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1
00:00:00,370 --> 00:00:03,080
La Fabrique
www.sous-titres.eu
2
00:00:28,770 --> 00:00:30,940
Look, guys,
I know it was just the Dolphins,
3
00:00:31,070 --> 00:00:33,740
but Tebow is definitely
our quarterback of the future.
4
00:00:33,860 --> 00:00:35,280
What do you think, Nelson?
5
00:00:35,780 --> 00:00:37,370
I didn’t see the game.
6
00:00:38,030 --> 00:00:40,790
You didn’t see the game?
What the hell were you doing?
7
00:00:40,910 --> 00:00:44,330
Took the wife down to Denver
to see that new musical in town.
8
00:00:44,460 --> 00:00:45,750
A musical?
9
00:00:48,590 --> 00:00:52,210
Nelson couldn’t watch football
’cause he took his wife to a musical!
10
00:00:53,920 --> 00:00:56,800
Good for you, Nelson.
Did you get a blowjob afterwards?
11
00:00:56,930 --> 00:00:59,010
– Sure did.
– Nice!
12
00:00:59,680 --> 00:01:02,430
– What?
– I took my girl to see that show.
13
00:01:02,560 --> 00:01:05,230
Got the best hummer
of my entire life afterwards.
14
00:01:05,350 --> 00:01:07,230
Forty five minutes nonstop.
15
00:01:09,020 --> 00:01:09,980
It’s true.
16
00:01:10,110 --> 00:01:12,400
I’m taking my wife on Saturday, bro.
17
00:01:15,740 --> 00:01:18,620
I’m telling you, Randy,
put your time in with the musical,
18
00:01:18,740 --> 00:01:20,780
and the rewards are awesome.
19
00:01:21,870 --> 00:01:24,540
Must be a pretty hot and steamy show.
What’s it called?
20
00:01:24,660 --> 00:01:25,660
Wicked.
21
00:01:26,620 --> 00:01:27,620
Wicked.
22
00:01:28,460 --> 00:01:30,290
Heaven knows
23
00:01:30,420 --> 00:01:32,090
We know what goodness is
24
00:01:34,630 --> 00:01:36,420
Heaven knows
25
00:01:36,590 --> 00:01:39,800
Wicked people aren’t good
26
00:01:40,680 --> 00:01:42,850
From head to toe
27
00:01:42,970 --> 00:01:44,180
She was just
28
00:01:44,600 --> 00:01:46,850
Wicked people
29
00:01:47,270 --> 00:01:49,350
Head to toe
30
00:01:51,110 --> 00:01:52,980
You want some alcohol or something?
31
00:01:53,570 --> 00:01:54,730
I’m good, thanks.
32
00:01:55,320 --> 00:01:56,530
I’ll be right back.
33
00:02:02,370 --> 00:02:03,990
Can I get a scotch and soda?
34
00:02:05,620 --> 00:02:07,000
Enjoying the show?
35
00:02:08,000 --> 00:02:09,870
It’s not really what I expected.
36
00:02:10,500 --> 00:02:12,710
To be honest,
I’m here for the blowjob.
37
00:02:12,840 --> 00:02:16,380
From what I heard, I figured the show
must be really sexy and hot, but…
38
00:02:16,920 --> 00:02:19,630
– I don’t see it happening.
– It’ll happen. Don’t worry.
39
00:02:20,090 --> 00:02:23,680
Your wife is being shot so full
of subliminal messages.
40
00:02:23,810 --> 00:02:26,470
All she’ll be thinking about
is blowjob.
41
00:02:27,680 --> 00:02:28,980
Subliminal messages?
42
00:02:29,100 --> 00:02:30,600
It’s a musical thing.
43
00:02:30,730 --> 00:02:33,110
Women are so caught up
in the singing and dancing
44
00:02:33,230 --> 00:02:34,520
they don’t notice it,
45
00:02:34,650 --> 00:02:37,280
but there’s a blowjob reference
almost every ten seconds.
46
00:02:37,400 --> 00:02:39,530
Broadway writers call it subtext.
47
00:02:39,650 --> 00:02:41,870
Just listen really closely.
48
00:02:45,160 --> 00:02:49,000
You’ll do great in the Emerald City.
I’m sure you can’t wait to go!
49
00:02:49,410 --> 00:02:53,630
– Take me away to that special place
– That blowjob place
50
00:02:53,750 --> 00:02:57,340
– Where people like us can all live free
– Free to give blowjobs
51
00:02:57,510 --> 00:03:01,300
Take me away, and let’s live together
52
00:03:01,430 --> 00:03:05,510
– That’s the life for you and me
– Blowjobs!
53
00:03:06,560 --> 00:03:10,980
– Let’s try denying gravity
– Look at them, becoming friends
54
00:03:11,100 --> 00:03:13,980
Here in Oz
You love blowjobs
55
00:03:14,150 --> 00:03:18,190
Suddenly, this is a free blowjob
56
00:03:19,990 --> 00:03:21,610
That was so much fun!
57
00:03:21,740 --> 00:03:24,280
All the costumes
and the sets were amazing.
58
00:03:24,410 --> 00:03:27,870
I really loved the songs.
That Stephen Schwartz is a genius.
59
00:03:27,990 --> 00:03:29,950
I’ve got them all stuck in my head.
60
00:03:33,750 --> 00:03:36,960
That was such a treat.
How would you like a little treat?
61
00:03:40,050 --> 00:03:41,300
No way.
62
00:03:48,600 --> 00:03:49,770
Come on, Larry.
63
00:03:51,560 --> 00:03:53,350
Why does those happen every time?
64
00:03:53,480 --> 00:03:55,440
Do something, you stupid vegan!
65
00:03:55,560 --> 00:03:58,780
Coach, Feegan the Vegan
won’t jump off the diving board!
66
00:03:59,860 --> 00:04:01,110
You don’t get it.
67
00:04:01,240 --> 00:04:04,200
I’m telling you, go see Wicked.
It’s the best time.
68
00:04:04,700 --> 00:04:05,820
How long with it?
69
00:04:05,950 --> 00:04:08,790
She started in the car,
and it lasted the whole drive home.
70
00:04:08,910 --> 00:04:11,790
And then, she kept going
for like another twenty minutes.
71
00:04:11,910 --> 00:04:13,250
Nice, bro!
72
00:04:13,410 --> 00:04:15,210
Get tickets.
It’s worth it.
73
00:04:15,330 --> 00:04:16,790
What was the show about?
74
00:04:16,920 --> 00:04:19,500
Shit, I don’t know.
Some green chick and a goat.
75
00:04:22,260 --> 00:04:24,430
Come on, Feegan.
Either jump or get off!
76
00:04:24,760 --> 00:04:25,760
Go!
77
00:04:28,260 --> 00:04:30,720
I thought Broadway musicals
weren’t for me either,
78
00:04:31,060 --> 00:04:33,640
but I didn’t know
about the whole subtext thing.
79
00:04:33,770 --> 00:04:35,730
I couldn’t really
appreciate them till now.
80
00:04:36,060 --> 00:04:39,650
Wicked isn’t even the best.
You gotta check out Jersey Boys.
81
00:04:39,770 --> 00:04:42,650
– It makes women hummer crazy!
– Really?
82
00:04:43,070 --> 00:04:45,450
Have you seen South Pacific?
That’s a jawbreaker.
83
00:04:47,490 --> 00:04:50,120
How would you like to go to New York
for the weekend?
84
00:04:50,240 --> 00:04:52,370
What?
Are you serious?
85
00:04:52,500 --> 00:04:54,750
I got plane tickets and a hotel room.
86
00:04:54,870 --> 00:04:57,330
– We leave in three hours.
– Oh, my God!
87
00:04:57,460 --> 00:04:59,500
First, you take me to Wicked,
and now this?
88
00:04:59,790 --> 00:05:02,130
Are you guys really going away?
What about us?
89
00:05:02,510 --> 00:05:04,670
Don’t worry.
I’ve taken care of everything.
90
00:05:04,800 --> 00:05:06,930
You’re staying the weekend
with the Feegans.
91
00:05:07,640 --> 00:05:09,140
Not the Feegans!
92
00:05:09,260 --> 00:05:11,310
No, please don’t do this!
93
00:05:14,020 --> 00:05:16,440
It takes a lot of guts
to be a vegan in today’s world.
94
00:05:16,560 --> 00:05:18,150
You get labeled soft or silly.
95
00:05:18,690 --> 00:05:21,150
But the truth is there isn’t a need
to eat animal product.
96
00:05:21,270 --> 00:05:23,150
Would you ever believe
that hotdog was vegan?
97
00:05:24,610 --> 00:05:26,150
Cancer, heart disease, drowning,
98
00:05:26,280 --> 00:05:28,660
all preventable
with a vegan diet and a life jacket.
99
00:05:28,820 --> 00:05:31,990
And if people wanna say we’re silly,
they can just laugh all they want.
100
00:05:32,120 --> 00:05:35,080
Because being vegan
is more important than being popular.
101
00:05:36,660 --> 00:05:39,420
Maybe you should let your son
decide that for himself.
102
00:05:44,760 --> 00:05:48,220
He does decide for himself.
He’s been a vegan since he was born!
103
00:05:50,760 --> 00:05:52,720
Maybe if Larry had a steak
once in a while,
104
00:05:52,850 --> 00:05:55,060
he wouldn’t get beat up
by every kid in school.
105
00:05:58,190 --> 00:06:00,520
When you think you have the flu,
you’re actually…
106
00:06:00,650 --> 00:06:03,650
Dad, you guys have to come back.
This isn’t working out.
107
00:06:04,530 --> 00:06:06,070
Please answer the phone.
108
00:06:18,120 --> 00:06:19,540
Man time!
109
00:06:21,500 --> 00:06:23,000
I need some man time!
110
00:06:26,670 --> 00:06:30,390
Horses fed and truck locked up
Been workin’ my fingers to the bone
111
00:06:30,760 --> 00:06:34,430
Now, I need a little bit of man time
Gonna see me a Broadway show
112
00:06:35,010 --> 00:06:37,180
– Anything goes
– Blowjob!
113
00:06:39,140 --> 00:06:40,140
Man time!
114
00:06:40,270 --> 00:06:42,520
Hear things more clearly
115
00:06:47,570 --> 00:06:51,570
I’m about to get drunk and loud
Gonna have me a rowdy good time
116
00:06:51,700 --> 00:06:55,540
All I need is my girl and my truck,
and some Rodgers and Hammerstein
117
00:06:56,240 --> 00:07:00,210
Sing, my angel
of… blowjob… music!
118
00:07:03,420 --> 00:07:06,590
But the tigers come at night
119
00:07:06,710 --> 00:07:08,260
On your face
120
00:07:24,560 --> 00:07:25,980
Man, it was great.
121
00:07:26,110 --> 00:07:28,400
A different Broadway show
every night.
122
00:07:28,530 --> 00:07:31,200
I’m telling you you guys,
New York is the place to be.
123
00:07:31,320 --> 00:07:32,820
Sounds like a dream, bro.
124
00:07:33,070 --> 00:07:34,700
It felt like a dream, bro.
125
00:07:34,820 --> 00:07:37,370
Broadway is simply
the greatest time a dude can have.
126
00:07:37,490 --> 00:07:39,870
Just kind of sucks
to be back here now.
127
00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:41,370
There’s no culture here.
128
00:07:41,500 --> 00:07:43,290
Only Broadway show
in Denver is Wicked,
129
00:07:43,420 --> 00:07:45,960
and I’ve already taken Sharon
to see it 23 times.
130
00:07:46,340 --> 00:07:48,840
And Wicked moves to Seattle
in a couple weeks.
131
00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:51,090
It’s gonna be blue balls
for all of us.
132
00:07:51,380 --> 00:07:53,800
Wish we could live in New York
where all the musicals are.
133
00:07:54,720 --> 00:07:55,720
Wait a minute.
134
00:07:55,850 --> 00:07:57,890
Why not bring Broadway
to South Park?
135
00:07:58,890 --> 00:08:02,060
Think about it, bros.
How hard can writing a musical be?
136
00:08:02,190 --> 00:08:03,940
We need some musicians, some actors.
137
00:08:04,060 --> 00:08:06,650
We can put on our own shows
right here in town.
138
00:08:09,320 --> 00:08:10,940
What a glorious Sunday.
139
00:08:11,110 --> 00:08:13,030
I know what I’d like to do
with my time.
140
00:08:14,280 --> 00:08:16,200
Would you like a blowjob?
141
00:08:16,320 --> 00:08:18,160
I would like a blowjob
142
00:08:18,280 --> 00:08:21,950
Nothing beats a blowjob
on football Sunday
143
00:08:22,080 --> 00:08:24,500
Excuse me,
I’m the queen of blowjobs
144
00:08:24,620 --> 00:08:26,920
Really?
I would love a blowjob
145
00:08:27,080 --> 00:08:30,630
A woman should give blowjobs
on football Sunday
146
00:08:30,800 --> 00:08:34,130
I want to be covered in semen
147
00:08:34,260 --> 00:08:37,890
On a bed in the Hotel Jerome
148
00:08:38,600 --> 00:08:41,890
A woman is prettiest covered in semen
149
00:08:42,060 --> 00:08:44,230
Give your husband a blowjob
150
00:08:44,350 --> 00:08:46,520
When you get home!
151
00:08:47,100 --> 00:08:49,270
And what about you, my fair lady?
152
00:08:49,400 --> 00:08:51,900
Could I trouble you
for a quick Lewinsky?
153
00:08:52,030 --> 00:08:53,320
I don’t know, kind sir.
154
00:08:53,440 --> 00:08:55,860
Blowjobs seem
a little degrading to me.
155
00:08:55,990 --> 00:08:58,700
Come now.
A blowjob isn’t with your mouth.
156
00:08:58,820 --> 00:09:00,540
It’s with your heart.
157
00:09:01,580 --> 00:09:06,080
Now, get on your knees
and put that heart to work
158
00:09:06,250 --> 00:09:08,710
Blowjobs!
Give us more blowjobs!
159
00:09:08,830 --> 00:09:11,710
Your duty is blowjobs
You love giving blowjobs
160
00:09:11,840 --> 00:09:14,550
’Cause what could be better
on a football Sunday?
161
00:09:14,920 --> 00:09:17,800
What could better
on a football Sunday?
162
00:09:26,310 --> 00:09:27,600
What do you want?
163
00:09:36,240 --> 00:09:40,530
Today, I went to 7-Eleven,
and I ate a Slim Jim.
164
00:09:41,410 --> 00:09:44,370
It was the greatest thing
I ever tasted.
165
00:09:45,160 --> 00:09:47,250
Nobody ever stood up for me before.
166
00:09:56,760 --> 00:09:57,840
Reginald!
167
00:09:58,720 --> 00:10:01,550
How about a hummer at halftime?
168
00:10:01,680 --> 00:10:04,890
A Super Bowl suckoff from me?
169
00:10:05,270 --> 00:10:07,770
A Super Bowl hummer at halftime
170
00:10:07,890 --> 00:10:11,060
From my lovely Blowjob Queen
171
00:10:11,190 --> 00:10:14,070
Two people in love, it’s amazing
172
00:10:14,190 --> 00:10:17,530
Tim Tebow, please don’t let us down
173
00:10:17,700 --> 00:10:19,610
How about a hummer at halftime?
174
00:10:19,740 --> 00:10:20,820
And hold.
175
00:10:20,950 --> 00:10:23,200
Sorry, we’re in a hold.
Just freeze right there.
176
00:10:23,490 --> 00:10:25,620
– This better be important.
– It is.
177
00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:28,660
I represent some of the biggest names
in all of Broadway.
178
00:10:28,790 --> 00:10:30,330
They wish to speak with you.
179
00:10:30,460 --> 00:10:32,540
Really?
Oh, my God!
180
00:10:32,670 --> 00:10:34,710
Take a break, guys.
This could be it!
181
00:10:38,760 --> 00:10:40,340
This is Andrew Lloyd Webber.
182
00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:42,850
– Stephen Schwartz.
– Hey, bro.
183
00:10:43,180 --> 00:10:44,430
Mr. Elton John.
184
00:10:45,890 --> 00:10:47,730
And Stephen Sondheim.
185
00:10:47,850 --> 00:10:49,060
’Sup, bro.
186
00:10:49,560 --> 00:10:51,060
Not much.
’Sup with you guys?
187
00:10:52,610 --> 00:10:55,730
I mean, ’sup, bro?
188
00:10:56,030 --> 00:10:58,110
Sit down.
We need to have a talk.
189
00:10:59,070 --> 00:11:02,110
We got wind of your musical.
What the hell are you doing?
190
00:11:02,410 --> 00:11:03,490
Same as you guys.
191
00:11:03,620 --> 00:11:06,450
Trying to get men everywhere
lengthier, better quality blowjobs.
192
00:11:06,620 --> 00:11:08,580
You’re making it too obvious.
193
00:11:08,700 --> 00:11:10,920
Women are gonna figure out
what we’re doing.
194
00:11:11,080 --> 00:11:13,130
Musicals are about subtext.
195
00:11:13,460 --> 00:11:15,090
My musical has lots of subtext.
196
00:11:15,420 --> 00:11:19,170
“A blowjob isn’t with your mouth.
It’s with your heart.
197
00:11:19,510 --> 00:11:22,590
“Now, get on your knees
and put that heart to work.”
198
00:11:22,930 --> 00:11:24,430
It’s a metaphor.
199
00:11:24,930 --> 00:11:28,720
Bro, what’s metaphorical
about a musical called
200
00:11:28,850 --> 00:11:31,730
Splooge-Drenched Blowjob Queen?
201
00:11:32,020 --> 00:11:35,480
Tricking bitches
into hour-long blowjobs is an art form.
202
00:11:35,610 --> 00:11:37,860
You have to leave it
to the professionals.
203
00:11:38,480 --> 00:11:41,650
Sorry if you guys
think you have a monopoly on subtext,
204
00:11:41,780 --> 00:11:43,490
but up-and-comers have a voice too.
205
00:11:43,820 --> 00:11:45,990
You’re gonna ruin everything,
you idiot!
206
00:11:46,330 --> 00:11:48,740
Sorry if my work
isn’t up to your standards.
207
00:11:49,080 --> 00:11:51,000
But now,
I need to get back to rehearsals.
208
00:11:52,540 --> 00:11:55,580
If Splooge-Drenched Blowjob Queen
wins the Tony,
209
00:11:55,840 --> 00:11:58,250
don’t expect
to be invited to my afterparty.
210
00:12:06,140 --> 00:12:07,720
What do you want?
211
00:12:08,640 --> 00:12:13,350
You make me come out of my shell
212
00:12:14,350 --> 00:12:17,980
You give me strength
where there was only fear
213
00:12:18,980 --> 00:12:22,360
I ate at a Burger King today
214
00:12:23,110 --> 00:12:26,570
And stood up to a boy
who called me queer
215
00:12:27,120 --> 00:12:31,830
When you pushed me off
the diving board, I fell
216
00:12:32,120 --> 00:12:35,670
And you make the world a nicer place
217
00:12:36,540 --> 00:12:41,550
So I can come out of my shell
218
00:13:06,240 --> 00:13:09,070
You wanna play
Settlers of Catan on Xbox?
219
00:13:11,200 --> 00:13:13,250
Blowjob Queen
220
00:13:13,950 --> 00:13:18,170
Don’t stop giving that blowjob
even when you’re tired
221
00:13:18,420 --> 00:13:21,170
Don’t stop, Sharon!
222
00:13:21,300 --> 00:13:23,760
And hold.
Sorry, we’re in a hold.
223
00:13:25,670 --> 00:13:29,300
– What is it now?
– Stephen Sondheim is pissed off.
224
00:13:29,430 --> 00:13:31,810
He wants to challenge you
to a bro-down.
225
00:13:33,640 --> 00:13:36,390
He wants to bro down?
I’ll bro down!
226
00:13:38,100 --> 00:13:40,900
Stephen Sondheim is the greatest
Broadway composer alive today,
227
00:13:41,020 --> 00:13:43,030
perhaps the greatest of all time.
228
00:13:43,150 --> 00:13:45,150
You do not want to bro down with him.
229
00:13:45,440 --> 00:13:47,110
What am I supposed to do?
Run?
230
00:13:47,360 --> 00:13:49,950
Don’t bro down against Sondheim.
It’s suicide.
231
00:13:50,240 --> 00:13:52,790
I’ve studied musicals.
I’ve seen them all.
232
00:13:53,080 --> 00:13:54,160
I can do this.
233
00:13:54,620 --> 00:13:55,660
Let’s bro down!
234
00:13:57,710 --> 00:13:59,170
You built another settlement?
235
00:13:59,500 --> 00:14:02,710
And I got a victory point
for roads connecting settlements.
236
00:14:04,340 --> 00:14:07,680
They’re having such a great time.
I really wanna thank you.
237
00:14:08,220 --> 00:14:10,760
Larry is really making Shelley
come out of her shell too.
238
00:14:10,930 --> 00:14:15,020
I’m a little nervous having Larry
without a life preserver on,
239
00:14:15,140 --> 00:14:17,060
but we have
to take chances sometimes.
240
00:14:17,350 --> 00:14:19,980
That’s what we’re doing,
putting our faith in Randy’s musical.
241
00:14:20,310 --> 00:14:22,980
I hear his musical
is getting a lot of attention.
242
00:14:23,110 --> 00:14:24,900
That it has a chance of making it.
243
00:14:25,030 --> 00:14:26,150
More than a chance.
244
00:14:26,280 --> 00:14:29,740
Randy’s having a meeting right now
with Stephen Sondheim.
245
00:14:32,160 --> 00:14:33,660
– What’s up, bro?
– What, bro?
246
00:14:34,160 --> 00:14:36,250
– Take a swing, bro!
– I’m right here, bro!
247
00:14:37,580 --> 00:14:40,750
Let’s go, Sondheim!
Wipe the street with his punk ass.
248
00:14:40,920 --> 00:14:43,880
– What makes you the bro-thority, bro?
– West Side Story, bro!
249
00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:45,960
– What, bro?
– Sweeney Todd, bro!
250
00:14:46,460 --> 00:14:48,220
Merrily We Roll Along, bro!
251
00:14:48,340 --> 00:14:50,760
– Why you gotta disrespect, bro?
– I do respect you, bro!
252
00:14:50,890 --> 00:14:53,050
– Show some respect, bro!
– I do respect you, bro!
253
00:14:53,180 --> 00:14:55,470
– Stop disrespecting, bro!
– I respect you, bro!
254
00:14:55,600 --> 00:14:56,770
I respect you too!
255
00:15:01,850 --> 00:15:05,610
The bro-down is over.
Let’s bro out!
256
00:15:05,730 --> 00:15:07,030
Bro out!
257
00:15:07,150 --> 00:15:09,070
Party, people!
258
00:15:12,870 --> 00:15:15,740
I’m so glad
we put our differences aside.
259
00:15:15,870 --> 00:15:17,540
That’s what bros do.
260
00:15:17,660 --> 00:15:19,620
That’s what bros fucking do!
261
00:15:19,750 --> 00:15:21,170
You’re all right.
262
00:15:21,290 --> 00:15:22,670
If it’s cool with you, bro,
263
00:15:22,790 --> 00:15:26,250
Elton and Andrew and all of us
wanna help you with your musical.
264
00:15:26,380 --> 00:15:27,170
Really?
265
00:15:28,340 --> 00:15:31,130
We can help you out a little bit
with the subtext.
266
00:15:31,720 --> 00:15:34,720
How about instead of
Spooge-Drenched Blowjob Queen,
267
00:15:34,850 --> 00:15:35,850
we call it…
268
00:15:36,430 --> 00:15:38,140
The Woman in White?
269
00:15:38,720 --> 00:15:39,890
That is beautiful!
270
00:15:42,230 --> 00:15:44,270
Cheers to Randy Marsh.
271
00:15:44,610 --> 00:15:46,860
Welcome to bro-dway.
272
00:15:46,980 --> 00:15:48,690
Bro-dway!
273
00:15:54,410 --> 00:15:55,910
– Hey, hon.
– Hi, babe.
274
00:15:56,030 --> 00:15:58,540
Sorry, I was kind of hanging out
with the guys.
275
00:15:58,990 --> 00:16:01,000
It’s fine.
You do plenty with me.
276
00:16:01,120 --> 00:16:02,210
You had a good time?
277
00:16:03,250 --> 00:16:05,420
We really made
some progress with the show.
278
00:16:05,540 --> 00:16:07,880
Andrew Lloyd Webber and those guys
are gonna help us.
279
00:16:08,670 --> 00:16:11,220
That’s great!
I’m really proud of you.
280
00:16:11,880 --> 00:16:13,010
You’re the best.
281
00:16:13,130 --> 00:16:15,550
I’m not feeling a hundred percent.
You care if I lay down?
282
00:16:15,680 --> 00:16:17,220
Of course not.
Go ahead.
283
00:16:17,350 --> 00:16:19,970
– All right.
– I’m just gonna wait up for Shelley.
284
00:16:20,270 --> 00:16:22,810
– What’s Shelley doing?
– I gave her those tickets to Wicked.
285
00:16:22,940 --> 00:16:25,060
She’s seeing it
with her little boyfriend.
286
00:16:26,150 --> 00:16:27,360
She’s what?
287
00:16:27,690 --> 00:16:30,400
Her and little Larry Feegan.
They’re going to see Wicked together.
288
00:16:30,530 --> 00:16:32,320
It’s Shelley’s
first Broadway musical.
289
00:16:34,740 --> 00:16:35,740
Oh, God!
290
00:16:39,370 --> 00:16:41,580
Slow down, Jesus Christ!
291
00:16:41,750 --> 00:16:43,910
Why didn’t you tell me
she was gonna see Wicked?
292
00:16:44,210 --> 00:16:45,540
Why does it matter?
293
00:16:45,670 --> 00:16:48,340
– She’s too young for that stuff!
– Too young?
294
00:16:48,590 --> 00:16:49,750
This is what l get.
295
00:16:49,880 --> 00:16:53,170
I drank from the lie that is Broadway,
and now it has my daughter.
296
00:16:53,300 --> 00:16:56,220
That’s it.
Turn this car around right now!
297
00:16:56,340 --> 00:16:58,390
– I can’t!
– Why?
298
00:16:59,680 --> 00:17:00,810
All right, look.
299
00:17:00,930 --> 00:17:03,390
There’s something
I should have told you.
300
00:17:03,520 --> 00:17:05,810
Broadway musicals
aren’t what you think they are.
301
00:17:06,310 --> 00:17:09,230
They’re subliminal propaganda
to get women to give more blowjobs.
302
00:17:09,360 --> 00:17:13,240
Buried in are commands
to perform oral sex.
303
00:17:13,360 --> 00:17:15,860
– It’s called subtext.
– That’s ridiculous.
304
00:17:16,030 --> 00:17:18,740
Musicals don’t make me
wanna give blowjobs.
305
00:17:19,370 --> 00:17:21,160
Remember the night
after we saw Wicked?
306
00:17:23,200 --> 00:17:25,210
– But…
– After Lion King in New York?
307
00:17:25,330 --> 00:17:26,750
Godspell?
Mamma Mia?
308
00:17:26,870 --> 00:17:28,380
Oh, my gosh.
309
00:17:28,500 --> 00:17:32,000
Broadway’s purpose is to make women
famished for blowjobs.
310
00:17:32,130 --> 00:17:33,880
I’m so sorry.
311
00:17:35,970 --> 00:17:37,050
This is crazy.
312
00:17:37,180 --> 00:17:41,220
Musical theater people
are respected, refined, cultured!
313
00:17:41,680 --> 00:17:43,390
They’re bros.
314
00:17:43,850 --> 00:17:46,310
Stephen Sondheim, Elton John,
Andrew Lloyd Webber…
315
00:17:46,640 --> 00:17:48,810
They’re total bros
who hang out at Hooters.
316
00:17:48,940 --> 00:17:49,980
I’m so sorry.
317
00:17:50,810 --> 00:17:51,900
It can’t be.
318
00:17:52,020 --> 00:17:53,320
I’ve loved musicals
319
00:17:53,440 --> 00:17:57,030
since I saw Grease with Jacob Harrison
and his brother Kip, and we…
320
00:17:57,150 --> 00:17:58,410
Oh, my God!
321
00:18:05,750 --> 00:18:08,750
No one cares about wicked people
322
00:18:09,250 --> 00:18:11,630
Now, she’s gone, but we don’t care
323
00:18:15,670 --> 00:18:17,010
Come on.
We have to go.
324
00:18:17,130 --> 00:18:20,340
– What are you doing here?
– Right now!
325
00:18:21,470 --> 00:18:23,600
You’re not watching this trash.
Come on!
326
00:18:23,720 --> 00:18:24,680
Would you mind?
327
00:18:24,810 --> 00:18:27,390
I’m trying to enjoy this musical
I’m with my granddaughter.
328
00:18:27,520 --> 00:18:29,440
You fucking pervert!
329
00:18:29,560 --> 00:18:31,650
All right, get the hell outta here.
330
00:18:42,160 --> 00:18:43,450
What are you doing?
331
00:18:43,700 --> 00:18:46,910
It’s time to put an end
to Broadway once and for all.
332
00:18:54,170 --> 00:18:58,010
You’ll do great in the Emerald City.
I’m sure you can’t wait to go!
333
00:19:00,180 --> 00:19:04,390
– Take me away to that special place
– That blowjob place
334
00:19:04,510 --> 00:19:08,310
– Where people like us can all live free
– Free to give blowjobs
335
00:19:09,100 --> 00:19:10,440
It’s Spider-Man.
336
00:19:11,940 --> 00:19:12,900
Sorry.
337
00:19:24,030 --> 00:19:27,490
Take me away to that special place
338
00:19:35,250 --> 00:19:38,210
Sorry, folks, we are in a hold.
339
00:19:54,190 --> 00:19:56,110
The musical
came to a screeching halt,
340
00:19:56,270 --> 00:19:59,320
as patrons flooded out the exits,
and water flooded the theater.
341
00:19:59,440 --> 00:20:03,160
The only fatality was a young boy
who could not get out in time.
342
00:20:03,280 --> 00:20:07,120
The fire chief said it was unfortunate
he wasn’t wearing a life preserver.
343
00:20:13,250 --> 00:20:16,340
I’m sorry you’re little friend
was killed by Spider-Man tonight.
344
00:20:19,210 --> 00:20:22,300
Just know that for Spider-Man
to have done what he did,
345
00:20:22,590 --> 00:20:24,380
he must have had a very good reason.
346
00:20:26,800 --> 00:20:29,180
Spider-Man works in mysterious ways.
347
00:20:29,310 --> 00:20:31,810
And wherever he is, he loves you.
348
00:20:38,480 --> 00:20:43,200
It’s just so wrong,
for men to manipulate women like that.
349
00:20:43,320 --> 00:20:46,700
Screw the singing and the dancing.
A woman’s mouth is sacred!
350
00:20:47,570 --> 00:20:50,040
Tomorrow,
I’ll call Women’s Day magazine
351
00:20:50,160 --> 00:20:52,250
and expose the whole conspiracy.
352
00:20:54,160 --> 00:20:56,710
I’m sorry.
I love you.
353
00:20:57,080 --> 00:21:00,710
I shouldn’t had tried to brainwash you.
You have every right to be mad.
354
00:21:02,090 --> 00:21:04,050
I don’t know
if I can really be mad at you
355
00:21:04,170 --> 00:21:06,840
for doing something
every guy in America does.
356
00:21:07,140 --> 00:21:08,140
Really?
357
00:21:11,010 --> 00:21:13,640
The bottom line is
I love going to those shows.
358
00:21:13,770 --> 00:21:17,230
If the fallout from that
is I make you really happy for a while,
359
00:21:17,350 --> 00:21:19,820
I guess they’re actually
a pretty magical thing.
360
00:21:20,650 --> 00:21:21,780
You’re the best.
361
00:21:23,990 --> 00:21:26,530
What Broadway show
you think is coming to Denver next?
362
00:21:26,700 --> 00:21:30,160
Whatever it is,
it’s worth the ticket price.
363
00:21:30,280 --> 00:21:32,830
Because couples that pay to see it
are gonna be stronger,
364
00:21:32,950 --> 00:21:35,040
better and much, much happier.
365
00:21:36,420 --> 00:21:37,540
You’ll get a blowjob.
26971
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