Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:10,517 --> 00:00:13,657
Bubble, bubble, toil and trouble!
2
00:00:14,118 --> 00:00:17,301
Tell me the ponies
and the daily double~
3
00:00:17,981 --> 00:00:19,421
Now, now, Mama.
4
00:00:19,707 --> 00:00:21,901
You know you're not allowed
to go to the track, anymore.
5
00:00:22,617 --> 00:00:25,542
Poisoned one triple
crown contender,
6
00:00:25,567 --> 00:00:27,901
and everyone gets
their shorts in a knot.
7
00:00:28,275 --> 00:00:30,021
Now where the heck is Gomez?
8
00:00:30,295 --> 00:00:31,788
I have to start dinner.
9
00:00:34,333 --> 00:00:35,821
That sounds like him, now.
10
00:00:40,769 --> 00:00:41,870
Fantastic!
11
00:00:41,895 --> 00:00:43,544
It's like shooting
fish in a barrel.
12
00:00:43,697 --> 00:00:45,951
You are shooting
fish in a barrel.
13
00:00:54,760 --> 00:00:56,206
Nervous little
critters, aren't they?
14
00:00:59,557 --> 00:01:01,052
We bring the catch of the day!
15
00:01:01,077 --> 00:01:03,861
Well, don't come in
before the eyes go bad.
16
00:01:06,310 --> 00:01:07,489
Here you go!
17
00:01:08,309 --> 00:01:10,012
Oh, they look so tasty!
18
00:01:12,395 --> 00:01:14,887
As Gomez is suave,
19
00:01:15,575 --> 00:01:17,421
as Fester is frightening,
20
00:01:17,770 --> 00:01:19,848
to cook up these suckers
21
00:01:20,184 --> 00:01:24,022
please bring me some lightning~!
22
00:01:26,357 --> 00:01:29,099
Ah, bouillabaisse fit for a King!
23
00:01:29,318 --> 00:01:30,571
Or more importantly,
24
00:01:30,755 --> 00:01:31,778
his Queen.
25
00:01:32,392 --> 00:01:36,072
Gomez, darling, d'you think it's true
that bouillabaisse is the food of love?
26
00:01:36,174 --> 00:01:37,529
For us, my darling,
27
00:01:37,553 --> 00:01:38,701
of course!
28
00:01:39,539 --> 00:01:40,742
For the red snapper?
29
00:01:41,181 --> 00:01:42,181
Not so much.
30
00:01:49,326 --> 00:01:51,240
♪ Welcome to the Addams family ♪
31
00:01:51,306 --> 00:01:53,273
♪ How you do, the
Addams family? ♪
32
00:01:53,305 --> 00:01:55,145
♪ Come into the Addams family ♪
33
00:01:55,287 --> 00:01:55,863
Now!
34
00:01:55,977 --> 00:01:57,130
Chachacha!
*snap snap*
35
00:01:57,201 --> 00:01:58,858
♪ Wonderfully scary ♪
36
00:01:58,930 --> 00:02:00,865
♪ And pleasantly hairy ♪
37
00:02:01,039 --> 00:02:02,814
♪ Delightfully?
Very. ♪
38
00:02:02,995 --> 00:02:04,402
♪ It's the Addams family! ♪
39
00:02:04,481 --> 00:02:04,928
*snap snap*
40
00:02:04,988 --> 00:02:07,148
♪ Welcome to the Addams family ♪
41
00:02:07,173 --> 00:02:09,175
♪ Come into the Addams family ♪
42
00:02:09,200 --> 00:02:11,274
♪ Come into the Addams family ♪
43
00:02:11,324 --> 00:02:11,900
Now!
44
00:02:12,014 --> 00:02:13,145
Chachacha!
*snap snap*
45
00:02:15,088 --> 00:02:16,661
It's very simple, children.
46
00:02:16,686 --> 00:02:18,463
All you need is 20/20 vision,
47
00:02:18,501 --> 00:02:21,101
nerves of steel, and some
ridiculously overpriced footwear.
48
00:02:33,940 --> 00:02:35,261
Swish~!
49
00:02:35,810 --> 00:02:37,381
Bravo, darling.
50
00:02:37,724 --> 00:02:38,568
May I try?
51
00:02:38,607 --> 00:02:40,061
But, of course, querida~
52
00:02:41,443 --> 00:02:42,421
Thank you, Lurch.
53
00:02:57,646 --> 00:02:59,146
Nothing but net!
54
00:03:00,256 --> 00:03:02,821
They don't call you "Air"
Addams for the heck of it.
55
00:03:03,425 --> 00:03:04,609
That's all, children.
56
00:03:04,703 --> 00:03:06,061
That's the lesson for today.
57
00:03:06,209 --> 00:03:07,341
Thanks, Father.
58
00:03:07,964 --> 00:03:09,861
Come to the dungeon, Pugsley.
59
00:03:09,993 --> 00:03:12,381
So we can practice
your "hang" time.
60
00:03:15,008 --> 00:03:17,621
Isn't it lovely that the
children play so well together?
61
00:03:17,993 --> 00:03:19,421
As do we, darling.
62
00:03:19,784 --> 00:03:20,747
Did you say "oui"?
63
00:03:20,943 --> 00:03:22,376
Sometimes that's
French, you know.
64
00:03:25,015 --> 00:03:27,501
There you go, overcompensating again.
65
00:03:27,861 --> 00:03:28,861
What was that, old man?
66
00:03:28,886 --> 00:03:30,232
According to
this article I read,
67
00:03:30,256 --> 00:03:31,741
you two should be miserable.
68
00:03:32,009 --> 00:03:33,421
What article is that, Fester?
69
00:03:34,035 --> 00:03:35,934
In this month's Psychobabble Today,
70
00:03:35,968 --> 00:03:40,021
there's an article called "The Dangers
of a Happy Marriage" by Dr. Pierre LeBlanc.
71
00:03:40,118 --> 00:03:41,661
If our marriage is dangerous,
72
00:03:42,378 --> 00:03:45,541
I'm prepared to dance on the
edge of doom for all eternity.
73
00:03:46,239 --> 00:03:47,421
Music, Lurch!
74
00:03:48,041 --> 00:03:50,501
To underscore this magical moment.
75
00:03:51,864 --> 00:03:53,621
You don't understand.
76
00:03:54,036 --> 00:03:56,221
This doctor really
knows his stuff.
77
00:03:57,547 --> 00:03:59,779
He's French, for goodness sake!
78
00:03:59,804 --> 00:04:00,908
You may be onto something.
79
00:04:00,932 --> 00:04:02,581
If there's one thing the French know about,
80
00:04:02,606 --> 00:04:03,756
it's l'amour~
81
00:04:03,781 --> 00:04:05,849
Nonsense, I'm sure
you mean well, Fester.
82
00:04:06,115 --> 00:04:08,581
But Gomez and I
couldn't be happier.
83
00:04:08,606 --> 00:04:10,341
Well, Dr. LeBlanc
doesn't think so,
84
00:04:10,366 --> 00:04:11,334
and neither do I.
85
00:04:12,163 --> 00:04:13,449
He says that to be happy,
86
00:04:13,473 --> 00:04:15,181
you have to fight sometimes.
87
00:04:15,294 --> 00:04:15,981
You know,
88
00:04:16,091 --> 00:04:17,287
mix it up a little bit.
89
00:04:17,390 --> 00:04:20,390
Well, as much as I'd like to stay
and pursue this rational line of thought,
90
00:04:20,415 --> 00:04:22,329
I'm due at the
National Cigar Society.
91
00:04:22,353 --> 00:04:23,541
It's Macanudo Night.
92
00:04:23,732 --> 00:04:25,021
Have fun, dear.
93
00:04:26,122 --> 00:04:26,821
I'm off.
94
00:04:29,495 --> 00:04:31,013
I'm serious, Morticia.
95
00:04:31,045 --> 00:04:33,508
If you and Gomez don't
start airing your problems,
96
00:04:33,663 --> 00:04:34,501
they're just going to,
97
00:04:34,633 --> 00:04:35,795
pardon the expression,
98
00:04:35,974 --> 00:04:36,781
fester.
99
00:04:43,105 --> 00:04:44,381
Tighter, Lurch!
100
00:04:44,444 --> 00:04:47,187
How am I gonna get a tension
headache without the proper tension?
101
00:04:47,212 --> 00:04:50,676
Would you like me to whip up
some of my famous Headache Potion?
102
00:04:50,701 --> 00:04:51,733
No, thanks.
103
00:04:51,758 --> 00:04:53,604
I want my head firmly attached,
104
00:04:53,628 --> 00:04:55,421
what with the Gomez
and Morticia crisis.
105
00:04:56,298 --> 00:04:59,381
Do you really think this shrink
knows what he's talking about?
106
00:04:59,406 --> 00:05:00,861
Of course he does.
107
00:05:01,101 --> 00:05:01,804
I tell ya,
108
00:05:01,829 --> 00:05:04,453
if Gomez and Morticia don't
start blowing off a little steam,
109
00:05:04,478 --> 00:05:06,781
their marriage is headed
straight for Splitsville.
110
00:05:06,867 --> 00:05:08,581
And we'll be orphans.
111
00:05:08,606 --> 00:05:09,941
Then we've got to do something.
112
00:05:09,966 --> 00:05:10,661
I know.
113
00:05:11,040 --> 00:05:12,172
We work together.
114
00:05:12,468 --> 00:05:15,408
We can get them into a
knockdown drag-out fight.
115
00:05:15,470 --> 00:05:17,461
Then they'll yell and scream.
116
00:05:17,531 --> 00:05:19,101
And kiss and make up.
117
00:05:19,189 --> 00:05:22,701
We'll give them the gift of an emotional
rollercoaster called Marriage.
118
00:05:22,805 --> 00:05:23,621
Everyone in?
119
00:05:23,646 --> 00:05:24,461
I am.
120
00:05:25,291 --> 00:05:27,102
Rollercoaster.
121
00:05:27,984 --> 00:05:28,621
Thing?
122
00:05:30,243 --> 00:05:33,581
Then 'Operation: Blow Up'
is now in progress.
123
00:05:41,227 --> 00:05:42,209
Oh, no.
124
00:05:42,233 --> 00:05:43,421
I'm choking.
125
00:05:49,826 --> 00:05:50,741
Oh, dear.
126
00:05:54,424 --> 00:05:55,704
Hang in there, old man!
127
00:05:59,055 --> 00:06:00,019
Thank you, Gomez.
128
00:06:00,043 --> 00:06:01,021
That was close.
129
00:06:01,164 --> 00:06:01,769
No problem.
130
00:06:01,793 --> 00:06:03,421
Whatever were you
choking on, Fester?
131
00:06:03,688 --> 00:06:04,694
A halogen bulb.
132
00:06:04,866 --> 00:06:05,558
I tell you,
133
00:06:05,582 --> 00:06:07,741
those 300 watts are killers.
134
00:06:08,098 --> 00:06:10,821
Tish, how is it possible
Fester's still single?
135
00:06:15,140 --> 00:06:16,421
Morticia, my pet.
136
00:06:17,792 --> 00:06:18,649
You didn't,
137
00:06:18,673 --> 00:06:19,671
perchance,
138
00:06:20,661 --> 00:06:22,301
rearrange the board just now?
139
00:06:22,820 --> 00:06:23,400
... Did you?
140
00:06:23,549 --> 00:06:25,369
Gomez, my darling.
141
00:06:25,565 --> 00:06:26,940
You're not accusing
me of fudging.
142
00:06:27,396 --> 00:06:29,222
Forgive me, amorita mia.
143
00:06:29,284 --> 00:06:30,737
Of course, not.
144
00:06:35,061 --> 00:06:36,928
My King stalemates your King.
145
00:06:36,952 --> 00:06:37,928
It's a draw!
146
00:06:38,343 --> 00:06:39,901
Neither of us wins.
147
00:06:40,285 --> 00:06:41,501
It had to be.
148
00:06:42,229 --> 00:06:44,940
We are so perfectly
matched, my love.
149
00:06:48,731 --> 00:06:51,101
I do so feel like dressing
up for dinner tonight.
150
00:06:51,727 --> 00:06:53,202
But I can't decide
between these two.
151
00:06:53,265 --> 00:06:53,757
Mama?
152
00:06:54,192 --> 00:06:55,101
Well,
153
00:06:55,126 --> 00:06:57,616
I wouldn't wear
that one if I were you.
154
00:06:57,641 --> 00:06:59,181
Definitely not that one.
155
00:07:00,279 --> 00:07:00,827
Why?
156
00:07:01,179 --> 00:07:02,085
That's the one,
157
00:07:02,110 --> 00:07:03,601
Gomez says,
158
00:07:03,626 --> 00:07:04,936
makes you look fat.
159
00:07:05,740 --> 00:07:06,740
Gomez said that?
160
00:07:06,811 --> 00:07:07,983
Yes, he did.
161
00:07:08,008 --> 00:07:08,621
Really?
162
00:07:12,051 --> 00:07:13,781
Perhaps I should have
a word with Gomez.
163
00:07:13,973 --> 00:07:15,341
Excuse me, won't you?
164
00:07:26,604 --> 00:07:28,941
Well, I guess I could always
learn to sleep sitting up!
165
00:07:29,498 --> 00:07:30,301
Gomez?
166
00:07:30,851 --> 00:07:31,581
Yes, querida?
167
00:07:32,167 --> 00:07:34,647
Is it possible that you think
I'm gaining weight on my...
168
00:07:35,122 --> 00:07:35,941
... derrière?
169
00:07:36,754 --> 00:07:37,176
Tish!
170
00:07:37,527 --> 00:07:38,261
That's French!
171
00:07:42,368 --> 00:07:43,289
Please, Gomez.
172
00:07:43,398 --> 00:07:44,621
Do you think I'm gaining weight?
173
00:07:44,899 --> 00:07:45,929
I certainly hope so.
174
00:07:46,257 --> 00:07:47,484
Then there'd be
more of you to love.
175
00:07:47,879 --> 00:07:49,461
Oh, darling.
176
00:07:52,504 --> 00:07:54,301
Great idea, Mama.
177
00:07:54,638 --> 00:07:56,598
You got a better one, Sparky?
178
00:07:56,944 --> 00:07:58,328
Well, not at the moment.
179
00:07:58,640 --> 00:08:00,168
But I'll think of something.
180
00:08:01,046 --> 00:08:02,766
Have I ever let you down before?
181
00:08:03,883 --> 00:08:05,261
Okay, since lunch?
182
00:08:06,054 --> 00:08:07,180
What about this?
183
00:08:07,541 --> 00:08:10,021
We put gunpowder
in Gomez's cigar.
184
00:08:10,302 --> 00:08:12,070
When it blows up in his face,
185
00:08:12,094 --> 00:08:13,802
we'll tell him that
Morticia did it.
186
00:08:14,049 --> 00:08:14,889
You forget.
187
00:08:15,178 --> 00:08:16,341
He likes that.
188
00:08:16,473 --> 00:08:17,261
Oh, right.
189
00:08:21,411 --> 00:08:22,501
Fester, here.
190
00:08:22,981 --> 00:08:23,668
Gomez?
191
00:08:24,014 --> 00:08:25,221
May I ask who's calling?
192
00:08:26,771 --> 00:08:28,781
The National Cigar Society?
193
00:08:29,922 --> 00:08:30,922
Just a minute.
194
00:08:31,565 --> 00:08:32,381
No, wait.
195
00:08:33,540 --> 00:08:37,421
Gomez told me to tell you that his
wife insists he quit your stupid club.
196
00:08:37,918 --> 00:08:40,141
And he wants you to
pay him back his dues.
197
00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:42,249
What can I say?
198
00:08:42,273 --> 00:08:44,341
She wears the pants around here.
199
00:08:47,059 --> 00:08:48,581
Now you've done it.
200
00:08:48,871 --> 00:08:51,613
Gomez loves the
National Cigar Society.
201
00:08:51,638 --> 00:08:53,504
He'll blow his top!
202
00:08:53,529 --> 00:08:56,106
Awooooooo!
203
00:08:59,585 --> 00:09:00,550
Yes?
204
00:09:00,575 --> 00:09:03,541
I demand to see Gomez Adams.
205
00:09:07,360 --> 00:09:08,341
You are?
206
00:09:08,972 --> 00:09:11,215
I am Fidel Cojiba,
207
00:09:11,429 --> 00:09:14,301
the President of the
National Cigar Society.
208
00:09:14,735 --> 00:09:16,341
Follow, me.
209
00:09:17,033 --> 00:09:18,421
President Cojiba.
210
00:09:19,403 --> 00:09:20,181
Fidel!
211
00:09:20,699 --> 00:09:22,278
What brings you to our
humble abode?
212
00:09:22,303 --> 00:09:23,668
Mr. Addams.
213
00:09:23,911 --> 00:09:26,901
I have a cheque to cover
the full refund of your dues.
214
00:09:27,230 --> 00:09:28,101
But why?
215
00:09:30,100 --> 00:09:32,209
Well, perhaps your wife
can explain that to you.
216
00:09:32,233 --> 00:09:33,821
The one with the pants.
217
00:09:34,066 --> 00:09:36,529
I figured Morticia
had a hand in this.
218
00:09:36,553 --> 00:09:37,511
Who else?
219
00:09:38,383 --> 00:09:39,156
She said,
220
00:09:39,180 --> 00:09:41,421
the society was stupid.
221
00:09:41,446 --> 00:09:42,581
She did?
222
00:09:42,871 --> 00:09:43,895
Then it must be.
223
00:09:44,059 --> 00:09:45,254
Sorry, old pal.
224
00:09:45,279 --> 00:09:46,629
I'll take that cheque now.
225
00:09:47,195 --> 00:09:49,061
And don't even think
about coming back.
226
00:09:49,237 --> 00:09:51,250
Your inability to
control your wife,
227
00:09:51,274 --> 00:09:54,749
impunes the integrity of all the
real men in the society.
228
00:09:55,801 --> 00:09:56,661
Good night.
229
00:10:00,389 --> 00:10:01,187
Nice fellow.
230
00:10:01,266 --> 00:10:02,501
A little tightly wound, though.
231
00:10:02,739 --> 00:10:03,701
Darling,
232
00:10:04,020 --> 00:10:05,559
did I hear a strange voice?
233
00:10:05,727 --> 00:10:06,501
Indeed.
234
00:10:06,769 --> 00:10:08,061
It was the voice in my head.
235
00:10:08,621 --> 00:10:12,061
And it's telling me I spent far too
much time at the National Cigar Society.
236
00:10:13,467 --> 00:10:15,667
It's also telling me we must
do more things together.
237
00:10:15,957 --> 00:10:16,901
Splendid.
238
00:10:16,926 --> 00:10:18,184
Perhaps another honeymoon.
239
00:10:18,209 --> 00:10:19,421
Capital idea!
240
00:10:19,629 --> 00:10:20,824
Let's look into Bosnia.
241
00:10:25,337 --> 00:10:27,381
Nice work, forehead.
242
00:10:27,721 --> 00:10:29,329
Oh, this is not over.
243
00:10:29,769 --> 00:10:32,529
Desperate situations call
for desperate measures.
244
00:10:32,871 --> 00:10:34,621
And I, have a plan.
245
00:10:41,882 --> 00:10:42,851
"Dr. LeBlanc."
246
00:10:42,876 --> 00:10:45,009
"There's a Mr. Fester
Addams on the line,
247
00:10:45,033 --> 00:10:46,351
he says it's an emergency."
248
00:10:46,429 --> 00:10:47,484
Isn't it always?
249
00:10:47,722 --> 00:10:48,495
Put him through.
250
00:10:50,869 --> 00:10:51,541
Pierre LeBlanc.
251
00:10:51,618 --> 00:10:52,415
Dr. LeBlanc?
252
00:10:52,454 --> 00:10:53,735
Have I got a problem for you.
253
00:10:53,806 --> 00:10:56,261
I just read your article and I think
you're the only one that can help.
254
00:10:56,286 --> 00:10:57,421
You're an astute man.
255
00:10:57,564 --> 00:10:59,532
What makes
you think that you have marriage troubles?
256
00:10:59,653 --> 00:11:01,661
Oh, it's not me. It's
my brother and his wife.
257
00:11:01,686 --> 00:11:03,024
They're happy all the time.
258
00:11:02,901 --> 00:11:05,741
Ah, a recipe for disaster.
259
00:11:05,920 --> 00:11:07,842
I've had five
marriages of my own.
260
00:11:08,101 --> 00:11:10,621
Each one blissfully
ideal, and then poof!
261
00:11:10,646 --> 00:11:11,569
Five marriages?
262
00:11:11,593 --> 00:11:13,021
You must really
understand women.
263
00:11:13,046 --> 00:11:14,462
Oh, I adore them.
264
00:11:14,486 --> 00:11:16,301
I've dured three men for women!
265
00:11:16,326 --> 00:11:17,357
A true romantic.
266
00:11:17,382 --> 00:11:19,221
Then you must help Gomez
and Morticia.
267
00:11:19,349 --> 00:11:21,037
Please come to the
house and observe them.
268
00:11:21,062 --> 00:11:22,420
But don't let them
know you're a doctor.
269
00:11:22,445 --> 00:11:23,678
Tell him you're a friend of mine.
270
00:11:24,084 --> 00:11:25,781
That would be
unethical.
271
00:11:25,974 --> 00:11:28,661
I'm sorry, you'll have to excuse me.
I have another phone call.
272
00:11:28,686 --> 00:11:33,141
But we can't let a beautiful woman like
Morticia go through life as a lonely divorcée.
273
00:11:33,166 --> 00:11:34,741
Beautiful, did you say?
274
00:11:34,766 --> 00:11:35,857
Exquisite.
275
00:11:36,140 --> 00:11:39,501
Ah, well, after all, I have my
professional obligation.
276
00:11:40,896 --> 00:11:41,560
Bye-bye.
277
00:11:43,149 --> 00:11:44,501
What's that you're sewing, Mama?
278
00:11:44,668 --> 00:11:47,701
Oh, it's a little idea
I've been working on.
279
00:11:47,771 --> 00:11:48,611
I call it,
280
00:11:48,635 --> 00:11:50,060
a "discomforter."
281
00:11:50,085 --> 00:11:51,861
How very cutting edge.
282
00:11:52,053 --> 00:11:53,092
That's the plan!
283
00:11:54,150 --> 00:11:55,541
Fester, friend.
284
00:11:56,241 --> 00:11:58,261
Oh, LeBlanc!
Ol' buddy, ol pal!
285
00:11:58,630 --> 00:12:00,731
You must be Morticia.
286
00:12:01,989 --> 00:12:03,052
Enchantée~
287
00:12:03,756 --> 00:12:04,603
It's French,
288
00:12:04,627 --> 00:12:05,771
and I don't care who says it.
289
00:12:06,628 --> 00:12:08,421
Yes, the French are so suave,
290
00:12:08,566 --> 00:12:11,861
but the Castilian so much more
exciting in his ardour~
291
00:12:13,173 --> 00:12:15,581
Mama, this is Fester's friend,
Monsieur LeBlanc.
292
00:12:15,747 --> 00:12:19,101
My, you are dashing.
293
00:12:20,612 --> 00:12:21,612
Thank you.
294
00:12:23,302 --> 00:12:25,849
Ah, what an unusual quilt.
295
00:12:26,178 --> 00:12:27,178
What is it made of?
296
00:12:28,029 --> 00:12:30,461
I see you found the machete.
297
00:12:31,256 --> 00:12:32,974
Shall we retire to the den?
298
00:12:32,999 --> 00:12:34,021
But, of course.
299
00:12:34,295 --> 00:12:35,990
So much more intime.
300
00:12:37,345 --> 00:12:38,889
Can you take it
easy with the French?
301
00:12:39,210 --> 00:12:40,661
I'm feeling a little
conflicted here.
302
00:12:43,438 --> 00:12:44,478
Allow me.
303
00:12:44,771 --> 00:12:46,209
Why, thank you.
304
00:12:46,719 --> 00:12:48,689
I'll give Lurch a
hand in the kitchen.
305
00:12:48,962 --> 00:12:50,581
Thing? To the kitchen.
306
00:12:57,411 --> 00:13:00,646
I don't mind saying that from
the moment I let my eyes on you,
307
00:13:01,490 --> 00:13:02,998
I was transfixed.
308
00:13:04,423 --> 00:13:07,501
I find you totally captivating, Morticia.
309
00:13:08,522 --> 00:13:09,812
Monsieur LeBlanc.
310
00:13:09,846 --> 00:13:11,901
I do believe you are
abusing our hospitality.
311
00:13:12,146 --> 00:13:13,740
I happen to be happily married.
312
00:13:13,765 --> 00:13:15,821
Well, I don't mean to brag,
313
00:13:16,013 --> 00:13:19,170
but I've made women forget
their husbands, in one day.
314
00:13:19,357 --> 00:13:20,806
Please, I love Gomez.
315
00:13:20,830 --> 00:13:22,021
Who is Gomez?
316
00:13:22,107 --> 00:13:22,943
My husband.
317
00:13:22,968 --> 00:13:23,701
You see?
318
00:13:25,373 --> 00:13:27,428
I've already forgotten him.
319
00:13:29,261 --> 00:13:29,981
Excuse me.
320
00:13:35,480 --> 00:13:36,381
Men,
321
00:13:37,607 --> 00:13:40,193
some of you will not be
coming back from this mission.
322
00:13:42,821 --> 00:13:44,333
Gomez, we got trouble!
323
00:13:44,358 --> 00:13:45,369
I certainly hope so.
324
00:13:45,393 --> 00:13:46,461
You don't understand.
325
00:13:46,596 --> 00:13:49,841
Morticia and LeBlanc are getting
pretty cozy out there on the couch.
326
00:13:49,882 --> 00:13:51,865
No wonder. I just had
the spings ripped out.
327
00:13:51,890 --> 00:13:52,865
Listen to me.
328
00:13:52,890 --> 00:13:54,662
He's trying to break
up your marriage.
329
00:13:54,687 --> 00:13:57,021
You got to get out there
and straighten Morticia out.
330
00:13:57,217 --> 00:13:59,739
I can't believe my darling querida
would even look at another man!
331
00:14:00,193 --> 00:14:01,513
It must be that cad.
332
00:14:01,941 --> 00:14:03,861
I go now to defend
the Addams' honour!
333
00:14:15,075 --> 00:14:17,603
Mr. Addams, your charming wife...
334
00:14:17,205 --> 00:14:18,301
I will not hear of it!
335
00:14:18,457 --> 00:14:20,221
You, sir, have trifled
with my marriage.
336
00:14:24,960 --> 00:14:26,141
Choose your weapons.
337
00:14:29,235 --> 00:14:31,381
These rapiers, in one hour.
338
00:14:31,406 --> 00:14:32,809
I was thinking silly string,
339
00:14:32,833 --> 00:14:33,821
but you're the guest!
340
00:14:34,171 --> 00:14:37,343
You will rue the day that
you crossed swords with Pierre LeBlanc!
341
00:14:37,108 --> 00:14:37,917
Not to worry.
342
00:14:37,941 --> 00:14:39,101
I am an Addams, sir.
343
00:14:39,126 --> 00:14:40,179
We live to rue.
344
00:14:50,781 --> 00:14:52,573
Thomas, what are you doing?
345
00:14:52,598 --> 00:14:54,329
Watch very carefully, Fester,
346
00:14:54,915 --> 00:14:58,261
as I slice this candle,
clean in half.
347
00:15:19,164 --> 00:15:20,742
... Uwahhhh.
348
00:15:55,900 --> 00:15:57,061
Poor Gomez,
349
00:15:57,086 --> 00:15:59,140
that guy's gonna turn
him into a hackysack.
350
00:15:59,405 --> 00:16:00,541
I'm afraid you're right.
351
00:16:00,871 --> 00:16:02,605
As much as I adore a good duel,
352
00:16:02,723 --> 00:16:05,305
it pains me to think of life
without my beloved Gomez.
353
00:16:05,805 --> 00:16:06,616
Fester,
354
00:16:07,132 --> 00:16:08,741
you've got to
put a stop to this.
355
00:16:09,700 --> 00:16:10,781
I don't know.
356
00:16:11,074 --> 00:16:13,425
I seem to be much
better at starting things.
357
00:16:13,496 --> 00:16:14,206
Haha!
358
00:16:23,403 --> 00:16:24,536
How's it going?
359
00:16:24,581 --> 00:16:25,165
Splendid,
360
00:16:25,189 --> 00:16:26,701
I hope I have collision on this.
361
00:16:26,889 --> 00:16:29,505
I just checked with the
cemetery and it's really full.
362
00:16:29,530 --> 00:16:30,958
There's no room for Pierre.
363
00:16:30,983 --> 00:16:33,143
So, I guess you're gonna
have to call off the duel.
364
00:16:33,360 --> 00:16:34,181
Nonsense.
365
00:16:34,254 --> 00:16:36,715
I'll just move Uncle Milo
on top of Cousin Henrietta.
366
00:16:36,856 --> 00:16:38,141
Trust me, she won't mind.
367
00:16:38,638 --> 00:16:39,101
See?
368
00:16:39,126 --> 00:16:39,802
The secret,
369
00:16:39,827 --> 00:16:40,872
is all in the wrist.
370
00:16:41,113 --> 00:16:43,818
I guess you're going to want to
keep your wrist in shape, then.
371
00:16:43,872 --> 00:16:44,356
Here.
372
00:16:45,220 --> 00:16:46,760
Let me massage it for you.
373
00:16:48,861 --> 00:16:49,621
How's that feel?
374
00:16:49,646 --> 00:16:51,381
Like you're digging
for bone marrow.
375
00:16:52,160 --> 00:16:53,021
Keep going.
376
00:17:00,621 --> 00:17:01,901
Sorry, Gomez.
377
00:17:02,540 --> 00:17:04,548
I guess you're gonna
have to call off the duel, now.
378
00:17:05,367 --> 00:17:07,301
Not when I still have one good hand.
379
00:17:08,992 --> 00:17:10,421
Well, what do you know?
I'm ambidextrous!
380
00:17:10,446 --> 00:17:11,954
Equally skilled with both hands.
381
00:17:13,414 --> 00:17:15,141
Yeah, equally awful.
382
00:17:17,829 --> 00:17:18,840
Monsieur Leblanc,
383
00:17:19,254 --> 00:17:20,535
would you care for some tea?
384
00:17:21,567 --> 00:17:22,421
Merci.
385
00:17:22,591 --> 00:17:23,427
De rien.
386
00:17:23,569 --> 00:17:25,369
Please, Morticia, speak English.
387
00:17:25,658 --> 00:17:27,581
It sets my soul afire~
388
00:17:28,022 --> 00:17:29,360
Monsieur LeBlanc,
389
00:17:29,814 --> 00:17:31,012
about this duel.
390
00:17:31,308 --> 00:17:32,609
You'll not talk me out of it.
391
00:17:32,835 --> 00:17:34,901
In three strokes,
you'll be a widow.
392
00:17:35,521 --> 00:17:37,141
How fortunate I
look good in black.
393
00:17:37,571 --> 00:17:39,020
Well, since I cannot
talk you out of it,
394
00:17:39,045 --> 00:17:40,593
then we must plan
for our honeymoon.
395
00:17:40,800 --> 00:17:41,649
Yes.
396
00:17:41,922 --> 00:17:43,061
Where shall we go?
397
00:17:43,338 --> 00:17:44,861
Man, I've always liked Bermuda.
398
00:17:44,959 --> 00:17:46,301
Islands.
399
00:17:46,326 --> 00:17:47,221
Triangle.
400
00:17:47,395 --> 00:17:48,837
But Fester, Mama,
and the children
401
00:17:48,861 --> 00:17:50,927
have their hearts set
on an ocean cruise.
402
00:17:51,363 --> 00:17:52,221
Excuse me.
403
00:17:52,413 --> 00:17:54,541
Fester has a thing
for Kathy Lee Gifford.
404
00:17:55,077 --> 00:17:57,061
They cannot come
on our honeymoon.
405
00:17:57,256 --> 00:17:59,235
But they must.
We're the Addams.
406
00:17:59,259 --> 00:18:00,276
We're inseparable.
407
00:18:00,374 --> 00:18:02,621
And with Gomez gone,
we'll have to stick together.
408
00:18:02,958 --> 00:18:03,763
And to you.
409
00:18:04,427 --> 00:18:06,901
This is not exactly what I had in mind.
410
00:18:08,252 --> 00:18:09,341
Don't worry, darling.
411
00:18:10,075 --> 00:18:12,036
In a few years,
they'll grow on you.
412
00:18:13,091 --> 00:18:14,216
Like a fungus.
413
00:18:17,140 --> 00:18:20,120
You know, maybe this whole
duel business is a bit impetuous.
414
00:18:20,751 --> 00:18:23,861
And I suddenly remembered
my 'Fear of Intimacy' meeting in...
415
00:18:24,075 --> 00:18:25,239
Oh my, I'm late.
416
00:18:25,571 --> 00:18:27,649
Say goodbye to your
lovely husband for me.
417
00:18:28,164 --> 00:18:29,473
He's a lucky man.
418
00:18:32,073 --> 00:18:33,333
And I'm a lucky woman.
419
00:18:33,366 --> 00:18:34,381
Where is he?
420
00:18:34,466 --> 00:18:36,575
\ I'll cut his heart
out and wear it on my sleeve.
421
00:18:37,077 --> 00:18:39,369
You're too late,
my love. He just left.
422
00:18:39,433 --> 00:18:41,221
I'm afraid he turned
out to be a coward.
423
00:18:41,398 --> 00:18:42,422
He was afraid of me.
424
00:18:42,446 --> 00:18:43,381
I knew it!
425
00:18:43,769 --> 00:18:44,769
Yes, darling.
426
00:18:45,042 --> 00:18:47,341
He was very, very afraid.
427
00:18:48,085 --> 00:18:48,981
Oh, Tish.
428
00:18:49,567 --> 00:18:51,958
I'd be lying if I
wasn't a little disappointed.
429
00:18:53,300 --> 00:18:56,480
I find the idea of potentially
dying for you incredibly romantic.
430
00:18:56,575 --> 00:18:58,177
You always do.
431
00:18:58,272 --> 00:18:59,849
You're absolutely
right, querida.
432
00:19:00,067 --> 00:19:01,541
I must become less predictable.
433
00:19:02,456 --> 00:19:03,102
Dance?
434
00:19:04,979 --> 00:19:05,741
Tango?
435
00:19:06,044 --> 00:19:07,219
Not tonight, my love.
436
00:19:07,629 --> 00:19:08,137
Tonight,
437
00:19:08,489 --> 00:19:09,661
we get jiggy.
438
00:19:41,589 --> 00:19:44,581
William Tell shot an
apple off his son's head.
439
00:19:44,933 --> 00:19:46,621
Could you pass me the
moonblock, my love?
440
00:19:46,646 --> 00:19:48,461
I believe I may have
been out here too long.
441
00:19:49,273 --> 00:19:53,381
It's so gratifying to see the children
take such a keen interest in history.
442
00:19:53,642 --> 00:19:54,786
It says here.
443
00:19:54,701 --> 00:19:55,621
Now, Fester,
444
00:19:55,934 --> 00:19:58,341
what have we decided about
you and magazine articles?
445
00:19:58,366 --> 00:19:59,181
I know,
446
00:19:59,270 --> 00:20:01,169
but I'm taking this Cosmo quiz,
447
00:20:01,194 --> 00:20:04,061
and I'm starting to think that my
love life isn't all that it could be.
448
00:20:04,086 --> 00:20:05,493
Don't be ridiculous.
449
00:20:05,672 --> 00:20:07,181
Right now, you
don't have a love life.
450
00:20:07,413 --> 00:20:08,221
Good point.
451
00:20:09,628 --> 00:20:11,101
Thanks a lot, Gomez.
452
00:20:18,543 --> 00:20:19,543
That's gotta hurt.
453
00:20:20,026 --> 00:20:23,141
And yet, such a small price
to pay for learning the classics.
454
00:20:23,410 --> 00:20:25,901
How did we become
so blessed, cara mia?
455
00:20:26,004 --> 00:20:28,261
Sometimes it's better
not to question, darling.
456
00:20:28,534 --> 00:20:32,261
Sometimes it's better just to
revel in the glory that is our love.
457
00:20:43,637 --> 00:20:46,559
Awooooo... !
31056
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof