All language subtitles for Spin City - 1x22 - Bone Free.DVD.SAiNTS.en

Another area of concern
is the scarcity

of city contracts
that are awarded

to female-owned businesses.

Mike, this is eerie.

She looks like the
first love of my life,

miss Lowell.

The first love
of your life,

and you called
her "miss ?"

Well, she was my high
school French teacher,

the first woman
I ever slept with.

Whoa, Mr. Mayor.

We're gonna have to
update your bio. Ooh.

In the same spirit,

I challenge the
administration to look inward.

Hello, Randall.

You're looking
good as ever.

Thank you, miss Lowell.

Merci.

Merci,
mademoiselle Lowell.

So, Randy, have you been keeping up

on your
conjugations,

or do I need to
keep you after class

for a few drills ?

Thank you
very much.

Sir, stand up,
sir.

I don't think that
would be prudent, Mike.

Sir, people are
staring at you.

What's the matter,
your foot asleep ?

No. No.

But there's another part of me that's...

very, very awake.

What are the ramifications
of the Mayor's sitting ovation ?

I expect it'll be a top
story in the news tonight.

There were
photographers there,

so the newspapers will pick it up.
By 6:00 tonight,

anyone with breasts
will hate us.

Welcome to my world.

Why couldn't the Mayor
just stand up ?

What ? What am I missing ?

How am I gonna
explain this ?

Ok, Nikki, um...

even though the Mayor
wasn't actually standing...

...he was
at full attention.

No !

Yes. Yes.
Now, the question is,

how are we gonna
explain this little snub

to the women's
action caucus ?

Snub ? The man paid the woman
the ultimate compliment.

Yeah, if they were
orangutans.

Now, come on. Somebody's
gotta have an idea.

We could say
he was paralyzed.

Of course the Mayor
would have to spend

the rest of his public life
in a wheelchair.

No, we could stage this
miracle operation,

like when they separated
those Siamese twins !

Think of the publicity !

Why don't we just say
he wasn't feeling well ?

Thank you.

You think
you can handle that ?

Press conference
first thing tomorrow.

That would be fine.

I'm still
not clear on this.

Can't you guys
control those things ?

Not always.

I mean, you can...
scold it...

...smack it around
a little bit.

But that only seems
to encourage it.

I am fascinated.

Sometimes all it takes
is a thought,

a memory.

Sometimes all it takes
is a slight breeze.

Yeah, it's
that easy, huh ?

Yet I have dated guys,

and they have thought
and thought and thought,

and in the end, they
still come up with nothing.

I wouldn't know
about that.

No, never
had a problem.

So, where
is this guy ?

He'll be here
any second.

I have two words
for you guys...

be-have.

This is the first time
since junior high

that I have not known
since day one

the relationship
was doomed.

Relax, Nikki,
you make the guy sound

like an endangered
species.

He is. He's single,
heterosexual,

and interested in me.

Bag him, tag him, and
breed him in captivity.

- What's up ?
- Hi !

Ohhh !

It's our 9-day
anniversary.

Oh, that's so sweet !

All I got you
was this.

Let's put these
in water.

Smooth move.

Those are
beautiful flowers.

Oh, yeah.
I was admiring those

when they were potted
in front of 2-g.

I picked up Chinese.

So he maybe stole
the flowers,

but he did just
buy us dinner.

And, oh, here's your
credit card, Nikki.

And we have
a loser.

So, yesterday
was a non-incident.

The Mayor simply
didn't feel well.

We have the highest respect
for Ms. Longley

and her organization,
and we hope

that she has
no hard feelings...

bad feelings...
no bad feelings.

The Mayor wasn't well ? What
do you mean ? Was he dizzy ?

Yes.

So it was like
a momentary blackout ?

Yeah, you could
say that, ok.

He couldn't stand because his
legs weren't getting circulation ?

Yeah, why not ? Ok. That's
right. Thank you very much.

Warm up the bus,
we are outta here.

You just described 3 major
symptoms of a heart condition.

Mike !
Mike !

Well, thank you,
dr. Lassiter.

If you had given me
a few more moments,

I could have
recovered.

Any more time, you'd have
pronounced the Mayor dead.

Hey, Mike,
if the Mayor croaks,

are you next in line,
and if so, am I after you ?

You're close.
It goes like this...

it goes me,
the public advocate,

the guy in the mailroom
that wears the helmet...

...then you.

Mike, this
is not good.

No. People will vote
for a sexist,

but not a Mayor with
a heart condition.

At least his problem
has migrated north.

You guys aren't seeing
the silver lining here.

The women's action caucus
has accepted our apology.

Our only downside
is that we seem to have

accidentally given the Mayor
a terminal illness.

I know how
to get rid of that.

Hold on one second.

Mayor's office.

Yeah, I'll accept
the charges.

Hi, George.

It's a simple fix. Release
the Mayor's medical records.

Then they'll know
he's in perfect health.

No problem.

Can you believe her ?

Why don't you just
go over to my apartment

and watch my TV ?

I'll get yours out of hock
this afternoon.

Why do women always
go for losers like him ?

Instead of losers
like you ?

We've gotta rescue Nikki
from that monster.

James, it's her
boyfriend, it's not Jason.

We can't turn our back on a friend
who's being taken advantage of.

It's resolved. We get
together and warn her,

and we don't quit
until she's as miserable

and alone
as the rest of us.

Mike, those medical records
will be delivered this afternoon.

What are you guys
talking about ?

Nothing.
We like George.

You guys are in here
trashing George ?

No, it's just that we think
he's taking advantage of you.

Back me up, guys.

That's awfully
presumptuous of you, carter.

That is so unfair.

George is not some kind
of deadbeat.

I will have you know,
he is a writer.

Ohhh ! Oh ! Ah !

He is writing
a screenplay !

Ohhh !
Ohhh !

What ? !

Oh, he's a writer !

That's like an actor

who's too lazy to work
in a restaurant !

Nikki, he's looking
for a free ride.

I know guys like him.

I am guys like him.

You are way
off base here.

George is too proud
to be a kept man.

Hey, great blouse.

And, uh...

some bad news.

Some stuff went down
with my apartment.

So I figured I'd crash
here for a while.

If that's cool with you.

Mike, did you get
my medical records ok ?

Yeah.

Uh, sir ?

You... you told me that you
had a clean bill of health.

Look at me.
I'm healthy as a horse.

Want to feel this ?

Desperately, sir.

Maybe later.
Uh...

no, what I'm concerned about
is your stay at the, uh...

shady brook facility ?

The golf resort ?

The mental hospital.

Oh ! That !

Yeah, you...

you think that'll be
a glitch ?

Just might.

I was only there
for one night,

and I have a very
valid explanation.

Thank god.

It was in the sixties,
I was at this party,

and this idiot
spiked the kool-aid.

And before I knew it,

I was 3/4 the way up a pine
tree, naked as a jay bird,

trying to get away from
all the giant bugs. There.

Well, there you have it.

Ok, so I just
explain to the press

that you were
in a mental hospital

because you were
taking acid.

Coincidentally, Mike,

that was the same night
I decided to become Mayor.

You don't say.

Ok, everybody,
grab a book.

The first person
to find a harmless disease

that matches
all the symptoms

Paul bestowed
upon the Mayor

is the big winner.

If only there were
someone we could call,

uh... someone trained
to diagnose diseases.

Let's see,
a butcher ?

No, he would
be meat.

A mechanic ? No.

Call a doctor !

No doctors,
not yet.

Mike, the odds of us
finding a matching disease...

got it !

"Rolio Pidgea."
It has all our symptoms,

lethargy, dizziness,
stiffness in joints.

This is excellent.

Now if you could
just find a condition

that doesn't include massive
inflammation of the buttocks...

...we'll be in business.

What's the plan ?

How do you feel about
sleep deprivation, sir ?

Yours or mine ?
Yours.

Not a big fan.
Why ?

The symptoms
Paul described

could have been brought about
by sleep deprivation. Oh !

We thought we'd keep you awake
for a while, bring a doctor in

and have him explain to the
press that you just need a nap.

Because I've been working
so hard for this city ?

It means staying here tonight
so we can keep an eye on you.

So I wouldn't be able
to go home to Helen ?

It's a get-out-of-
marriage-free card, sir.

See you around 7:00.

Hey, dudes.

Afternoon...

dude.

I miss you already.

Post-its !

You can take 'em home. Oh, cool !

Bathroom ?
Down the hall.

Cooler.

It's like he conserves energy by
saying as few words as possible.

He's a little shy.

He reached out
with a "hey, dude"

before he started stealing
our office supplies.

He borrowed
some post-it notes.

That was quick.

Oh, I didn't
need to go.

I just wanted to pick up
some T.P. for la casa.

I didn't know we were allowed
to take toilet paper home.

You're not.

This is for you.

I gotta get
back to work.

Work. Work.

Yeah, nose
to the grindstone.

Pace yourself.

Oh, look,
he wrote me a poem.

"I think of you and my legs are shaking,

"on the way
home from work,

please pick up
some eggs and bacon."

Please tell me his script
is better than that.

I don't know because
he writes it during the day.

He doesn't want me to
read it until it's done.

Aren't even you
just a little bit curious ?

Like, say some night,
when he's out on the...

fire escape...

smoking a cigarette butt
he found on his way home

from 50 cent beer night.

No, I trust him.

Don't you want to know
if he has any potential ?

I am not a snoop.

Hey, these guys
are snoops.

Oh, yeah. Absolutely. Not a problem.

I don't have
a problem with it.

I refuse to have you guys
break into my apartment

some night like tonight,
like around 9:00

when you know I'm not gonna be there,

so you can see if George's
screenplay really exists.

Keys are
in the top drawer.

Mm-hmm.

It's under
the address book.

So the staff
will sit up with you

in 4 hour shifts,
sir.

I don't want you
to get too excited,

but Paul is gonna be
teaching you origami.

Gin.

What time is it ?
I'm exhausted.

It's, uh, 7:30, sir.

Hey !

I think I found it.

Ha.

Donovan's last battle.

Ooh.

"Interior,
a modest living unit

on the clark-7
spaceport."

Get the...
ha ha.

"A door opens.

Donovan Fazer enters, for
this is his living unit."

You are making that up.
Wait a minute.

Oh, my...

"Donovan,
you promised me

the last battle would be
your last battle !"

"I guess it was

only my
second-to-last. My bad !"

Ohh.
This is unbelievable.

What are you doing ?
What are you doing ?

Just poking around. I've never
been here without Nikki before.

She probably didn't want you
getting into anything personal.

Oh, like what ?

Ooh.

A "c."

Congratulations. You've just
brought back the panty raid.

I'll put this script back
so we can get out of here.

And go !

4 seconds !

Ah, the summer of '78.

What was
that girl's name ?

You got Nikki's underwear
all over the place.

Wait a minute.

These are George's.

Spence had exactly
the same pair.

Oh, yeah,
Debbie Ellis.

Wow.

Whatcha doin' ?

Just sitting.

Uh, what are
you doing ?

Sittin'.

So, what's
the problem ?

No problem.

Hey, uh, you don't want to go, or...

do you ?

I could sit.

That's a great book.
I love that author.

He also writes
mysteries.

You wouldn't know that
'cause you're sleeping.

You sleep with your eyes
open, don't you, sir ?

Sir,
you're scaring me.

Mike, the Mayor's asleep. Mr. Mayor !

Sorry, I'm up. I'm up.

I thought
I made this clear.

I don't feel comfortable
disturbing the Mayor.

Whatever you do,

don't wake me up.

Do wake the Mayor up.

Don't.

Don't.

Do.

Don't, do.

Don't, do ?

Don't... don't, do.

I'm on that.

Ok, we should get started
on a little dialogue here.

I think...
oh, no.

Hello.

Hi.
I'm dr. Barrow.

Mike Flaherty. I thought
Dr. Purtz was coming.

He's at a high school
graduation.

Son-of-a-gun. He told me he
already graduated high school.

So, what's
the prognosis ?

Well, I thought
I'd examine him first.

Hey, you're
the doctor.

His pupils are
a little dilated.

That sounds like
sleep deprivation to me.

Why don't you write that down
and we'll be on our way ?

I'll handle this,
bobo.

So that'll be our little
pet name for me ?

I'm going to give him
a full check-up.

All right. Well, I'm
sorry. Just trying to help.

I'll just
be on my way.

Now, then,
could you strip down

to your briefs, please ?

Well, we just met,
but I'm game.

Hope you're all happy.

That's the sound
of a single woman.

Congratulations ?

Go away.

Aw. At least tell us
how you got rid of him.

Screaming fight ?
Changed the locks ?

Or my personal favorite,
the gorilla gram ?

No. I just told him
it wasn't working out.

I gave him cab fare.

We had sex one more time. He was gone.

You know, anytime you
want to break up with me...

you don't even have
to give me cab fare.

So, for all of you who let
your imaginations run wild...

and you know who you are...

...the answer is simple.

The Mayor was suffering
from sleep deprivation.

Needless to say,
he's resting comfortably now.

So I hope you've all
learned a lesson here.

Playing doctor should be left
to qualified professionals.

And of course,
curious youngsters.

Now, dr. Maria barrow
is gonna make a statement.

Doctor ?

Good morning. After
having examined the Mayor,

I've determined that he is in
extraordinarily good health.

His condition was
a result of stress

and excessively long hours.

This could happen to anyone
regardless of age

who works as hard
as he does.

Sorry.

Thank you, dr. Barrow.

You know, Mike...

you really should come up
to my office for a check-up.

I promise I'll be very...

very gentle.

You want to wrap it up ? Oh ! Oh ! Uh...

so... so that's it.

And, uh, thanks...
thanks for stopping by.

Mr. Flaherty !

Mike, they don't know
it's over till you leave.

Well...

they're gonna...

they're gonna have to
take my word for it, Paul.

That's it, people.

Trust me, Mike, you have to walk out.

Paul, let it go.

All right,
that's it.

Nothing to see here.

Just a man
and his podium.

Thank you,
dr. Barrow.

Did you all
see this variety ?

Let's see.

Ooh. 20-something
writer, George Eudell...

isn't that...
yes, it is. Go on.

Bla bla..."bidding war..."

bla bla...
"Jean-Claude Van Damme..."

bla bla...
"7-figure advance."

Whoa, 7 figures ?

Yeah, I'll save you all

from having to count that
on your little fingers.

That's one million dollars.

You all owe me
a rich husband,

and he'd better have

a rock-hard ass.

Well, I'd marry her,

but I'm a little
short on cash.

Sit, Ubu, sit.
Good dog.