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Synced & corrected by -robtor-
www.addic7ed.com
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- _
- _
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Hey.
14
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Hey.
15
00:00:42,420 --> 00:00:43,553
How do I get off of this thing?
16
00:00:43,577 --> 00:00:44,544
Oh, I told you we should've
17
00:00:44,568 --> 00:00:46,355
broken with those people years ago.
18
00:00:46,379 --> 00:00:49,458
So, listen, uh, thanks for
grabbing lunch with me.
19
00:00:49,482 --> 00:00:51,827
There's kind of something
I wanted to talk to you about.
20
00:00:51,851 --> 00:00:53,362
Help yourself.
21
00:00:53,386 --> 00:00:55,965
So, I'm on my way to
an appointment this morning.
22
00:00:55,989 --> 00:00:57,600
And I get this call from Denver.
23
00:00:57,624 --> 00:00:59,468
Denver? Who do you know in Denver?
24
00:00:59,492 --> 00:01:00,870
Well, it's this guy, Will Harris.
25
00:01:00,894 --> 00:01:03,072
We overlapped for a few weeks
at Jackson Plumbing,
26
00:01:03,096 --> 00:01:04,673
and how he's over at Hinterland Sports.
27
00:01:04,697 --> 00:01:07,109
You ever heard of 'em?
Camping gear we can't afford?
28
00:01:07,133 --> 00:01:09,445
Right, so it's kind of crazy,
29
00:01:09,469 --> 00:01:11,881
but he says there's an opening
in his department
30
00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:14,116
and he wants to know if
I want to interview for it.
31
00:01:14,140 --> 00:01:16,018
Guess he thought I had sales chops.
32
00:01:16,042 --> 00:01:17,987
Wow, that's flattering.
33
00:01:18,011 --> 00:01:19,722
Is that something you might
actually want to do?
34
00:01:19,746 --> 00:01:20,890
I don't know.
35
00:01:20,914 --> 00:01:22,625
Seems kind of cool
and it's a national company,
36
00:01:22,649 --> 00:01:24,427
so you can move up and stuff.
But I don't know.
37
00:01:24,451 --> 00:01:27,396
They just want me to come out,
talk to 'em, and check it out.
38
00:01:27,420 --> 00:01:29,331
Well, maybe you should.
39
00:01:29,355 --> 00:01:31,901
Yeah, yeah, I mean,
I've got a day off owed to me,
40
00:01:31,925 --> 00:01:33,369
so I was thinking I could
drive out, interview,
41
00:01:33,393 --> 00:01:35,037
and come back the next day.
42
00:01:35,061 --> 00:01:37,039
So, uh, what should I do?
43
00:01:37,063 --> 00:01:38,174
You think it's a good idea?
44
00:01:38,198 --> 00:01:40,443
I do think it's a good idea.
45
00:01:40,467 --> 00:01:43,112
I'll tell you what's a bad idea,
though...
46
00:01:43,136 --> 00:01:44,613
- Hm?
- ...telling your mother.
47
00:01:44,637 --> 00:01:46,148
- Why?
- You know how your mom is.
48
00:01:46,172 --> 00:01:48,484
If she thinks there's even
a chance of you moving away,
49
00:01:48,508 --> 00:01:51,320
she'll get all worried
and freak herself out.
50
00:01:51,344 --> 00:01:52,755
So what do I tell her?
51
00:01:52,779 --> 00:01:54,657
It's a quick trip.
52
00:01:54,681 --> 00:01:56,725
You're in and out so much
53
00:01:56,749 --> 00:01:58,093
she probably won't even notice
you're gone.
54
00:01:58,117 --> 00:02:00,051
If she does, I'll cover for ya.
55
00:02:03,122 --> 00:02:04,333
What's with the basket?
56
00:02:04,357 --> 00:02:06,202
I'm putting it together
for Grandma for Mother's Day.
57
00:02:06,226 --> 00:02:08,103
Check it out. I've got
all her favorite stuff...
58
00:02:08,127 --> 00:02:11,440
Jordan Almonds,
a pre-highlighted "TV Guide,"
59
00:02:11,464 --> 00:02:13,876
and a pair of tweezers
'cause she kept asking me
60
00:02:13,900 --> 00:02:15,511
if I took her good tweezers
when she was here.
61
00:02:15,535 --> 00:02:16,712
And I yelled at her
62
00:02:16,736 --> 00:02:18,547
and then I realized
I actually had by mistakes.
63
00:02:18,571 --> 00:02:21,884
Oh, by the way, I'm really only
asking for planning purposes,
64
00:02:21,908 --> 00:02:23,686
are we doing anything Sunday
for Mother's Day?
65
00:02:23,710 --> 00:02:25,421
This Sunday?!
66
00:02:25,445 --> 00:02:26,655
Oh, my God.
67
00:02:26,679 --> 00:02:29,291
Oh, my God, I am the worst daughter ever!
68
00:02:29,315 --> 00:02:30,926
Gotcha.
69
00:02:30,950 --> 00:02:32,027
Bah-bam!
70
00:02:32,051 --> 00:02:35,364
Like, I'm ever gonna forget Mother's Day!
71
00:02:38,852 --> 00:02:41,511
_
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- _
- _
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00:02:47,417 --> 00:02:48,890
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00:03:00,370 --> 00:03:02,370
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77
00:03:14,394 --> 00:03:16,038
- Ahh!
- Oh!
78
00:03:16,062 --> 00:03:17,473
What are you doing?
79
00:03:17,497 --> 00:03:20,309
Look, sometimes when a woman
reaches a certain age,
80
00:03:20,333 --> 00:03:21,777
she gets hot in the middle of the night
81
00:03:21,801 --> 00:03:23,946
and she needs to get up
and go put ice cream sandwiches
82
00:03:23,970 --> 00:03:25,014
under her boobs.
83
00:03:25,038 --> 00:03:26,448
What are you doing up
at 3:00 in the morning?
84
00:03:26,472 --> 00:03:28,784
Getting a snack that will
never, ever again
85
00:03:28,808 --> 00:03:30,319
be ice cream sandwiches.
86
00:03:30,343 --> 00:03:31,554
Why do you have your briefcase?
87
00:03:32,446 --> 00:03:35,324
Oh, I'm going to work.
88
00:03:35,348 --> 00:03:37,860
Oh. What do you need
a duffel bag for at work?
89
00:03:37,884 --> 00:03:40,051
Did I say work?
90
00:03:40,076 --> 00:03:41,554
I meant work out.
91
00:03:41,688 --> 00:03:43,032
Yeah, now's the best time to go
92
00:03:43,056 --> 00:03:44,500
'cause I can get on any equipment I want.
93
00:03:44,524 --> 00:03:45,501
Hmm.
94
00:03:45,525 --> 00:03:48,170
So, anyway, I'm gonna be in and out,
95
00:03:48,194 --> 00:03:50,072
probably more out than in,
96
00:03:50,096 --> 00:03:53,309
so I'll see you when I see you.
97
00:04:01,867 --> 00:04:03,344
Brick! Are you not getting my texts?
98
00:04:03,369 --> 00:04:04,813
We have to figure out Mother's Day.
99
00:04:04,837 --> 00:04:06,348
Oh, if it were 1947,
100
00:04:06,372 --> 00:04:08,450
we could take her to
Collier's Family Restaurant,
101
00:04:08,474 --> 00:04:11,320
but it closed in 1983 due to
a fire and never re-opened.
102
00:04:11,344 --> 00:04:12,587
That's great!
103
00:04:12,611 --> 00:04:15,691
But we got to find someplace
to take Mom in this century.
104
00:04:15,715 --> 00:04:17,793
Ahh, 1983...
105
00:04:17,817 --> 00:04:19,261
that was Box Number Nine.
106
00:04:19,285 --> 00:04:20,462
I worked my way through
107
00:04:20,486 --> 00:04:23,031
all nine boxes of microfiche
I got from the library.
108
00:04:23,055 --> 00:04:24,866
And it's over.
109
00:04:24,890 --> 00:04:25,901
Really, Brick?
110
00:04:25,925 --> 00:04:27,869
You read all that microfiche?
111
00:04:27,893 --> 00:04:31,039
Yep. Nine years worth of stories... done.
112
00:04:31,063 --> 00:04:32,908
I should've appreciated it more.
113
00:04:32,932 --> 00:04:34,843
I guess I could go back
and look through 'em again.
114
00:04:34,867 --> 00:04:35,944
But, it's not the same
115
00:04:35,968 --> 00:04:37,698
knowing there aren't any new ones coming.
116
00:04:37,722 --> 00:04:38,714
Okay, get up.
117
00:04:38,738 --> 00:04:39,781
Get up. Get up!
118
00:04:39,805 --> 00:04:41,149
Stop living in the past.
119
00:04:41,173 --> 00:04:43,819
You have spent the last year
hunched over that thing,
120
00:04:43,843 --> 00:04:45,220
missing out on life.
121
00:04:45,244 --> 00:04:47,155
There is a whole world out there, Brick.
122
00:04:47,179 --> 00:04:48,490
It's called Orson, Indiana.
123
00:04:48,514 --> 00:04:51,059
Hey, you grieve for
the microfiche in your way,
124
00:04:51,083 --> 00:04:52,427
and I'll grieve in mine.
125
00:04:52,451 --> 00:04:53,996
Ugh, whatever.
126
00:04:54,020 --> 00:04:55,430
Just think of a Mom gift.
127
00:04:55,454 --> 00:04:56,865
I'm getting an ice cream sandwich.
128
00:04:56,889 --> 00:04:59,034
I hope they're not mushy like last time.
129
00:05:02,661 --> 00:05:04,106
I don't understand this.
130
00:05:04,130 --> 00:05:06,208
Phones are for emergencies
and ordering pizza.
131
00:05:06,232 --> 00:05:07,275
That's it.
132
00:05:07,299 --> 00:05:08,610
Look, we're lucky we have a daughter
133
00:05:08,634 --> 00:05:09,878
who wants to share with us.
134
00:05:09,902 --> 00:05:11,079
Not like Axl.
135
00:05:11,103 --> 00:05:12,881
He was acting really weird
the other night.
136
00:05:12,905 --> 00:05:15,751
And where's he been lately?
It's like he's never around.
137
00:05:15,775 --> 00:05:17,052
Oh, I saw him.
138
00:05:17,076 --> 00:05:18,620
He was in. And then out again.
139
00:05:18,644 --> 00:05:20,155
And the in again.
140
00:05:20,179 --> 00:05:21,323
Oh, he's in now?
141
00:05:21,347 --> 00:05:22,891
Um, y-yeah, I think so.
142
00:05:22,915 --> 00:05:24,626
Oh, 'cause I need to tell him that...
143
00:05:24,650 --> 00:05:26,561
What are you doing?
144
00:05:27,940 --> 00:05:29,940
_
145
00:05:30,790 --> 00:05:32,267
You know what, I was wrong.
146
00:05:32,291 --> 00:05:34,936
He is out, actually.
147
00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:36,071
He's working out.
148
00:05:36,095 --> 00:05:37,372
Again?
149
00:05:37,396 --> 00:05:39,875
He was working out at
the crack of dawn the other day.
150
00:05:39,899 --> 00:05:41,410
Hey, what's wrong with buffing up?
151
00:05:41,434 --> 00:05:42,978
Nothing wrong with going to the gym.
152
00:05:43,002 --> 00:05:45,047
You could certainly go to Curves more.
153
00:05:46,098 --> 00:05:48,083
Uh, well, if we're doling out
personal advice,
154
00:05:48,107 --> 00:05:49,907
you could answer your daughter's text.
155
00:05:52,928 --> 00:05:54,075
_
156
00:05:54,146 --> 00:05:55,679
Get me off this thing.
157
00:05:58,551 --> 00:06:00,429
Brick, what are you doing?
158
00:06:00,453 --> 00:06:03,065
You were supposed to be making
a list of potential Mom gifts.
159
00:06:03,089 --> 00:06:05,622
You said I was spending too much
time with the microfiche,
160
00:06:05,758 --> 00:06:06,768
and you were right.
161
00:06:06,792 --> 00:06:08,036
I thought I could never love again.
162
00:06:08,060 --> 00:06:09,805
But I've discovered something
so much better.
163
00:06:09,829 --> 00:06:12,240
Have you heard of this "Val-U Pack"?
164
00:06:12,264 --> 00:06:13,542
It's loaded with literally
165
00:06:13,566 --> 00:06:15,143
hundreds of dollars worth of savings,
166
00:06:15,167 --> 00:06:16,945
and it comes in this handy carrying case.
167
00:06:16,969 --> 00:06:18,814
Look at all these typefaces...
168
00:06:18,838 --> 00:06:21,983
italic, bold, serif, sans serif...
169
00:06:22,007 --> 00:06:23,718
it's a veritable font of fonts!
170
00:06:23,742 --> 00:06:25,520
And so much creative wordplay.
171
00:06:25,544 --> 00:06:30,292
Check out this gutsy spelling
of "Through"... T-H-R-U!
172
00:06:30,316 --> 00:06:31,593
It's almost naughty.
173
00:06:31,617 --> 00:06:33,895
Yeah, I've heard of 'em, Brick.
Everyone has.
174
00:06:33,919 --> 00:06:35,430
They come every week.
175
00:06:35,454 --> 00:06:36,531
What?!
176
00:06:36,555 --> 00:06:38,867
How could we be passing up
all these great deals?
177
00:06:38,891 --> 00:06:41,103
"Free brake inspection at Tire Time,"
178
00:06:41,127 --> 00:06:44,206
"$10 off Captain Suds power wash,"
179
00:06:44,230 --> 00:06:48,143
oh, and check this out, walk-in tubs.
180
00:06:48,167 --> 00:06:49,277
All these years,
181
00:06:49,301 --> 00:06:51,346
we've been climbing into
our tubs like idiots!
182
00:06:51,370 --> 00:06:53,081
This is not what I meant
183
00:06:53,105 --> 00:06:54,616
when I said you should start living life.
184
00:06:54,640 --> 00:06:56,852
"Half off your next pair
of contact lenses."
185
00:06:56,876 --> 00:07:00,055
I hope I have bad eyesight
'cause if they botch my...
186
00:07:00,079 --> 00:07:03,525
laser surgery...
this lawyer will hunt them down!
187
00:07:03,549 --> 00:07:04,926
Brick, get a grip!
188
00:07:04,950 --> 00:07:08,396
We are not gonna find a gift for
Mom in this stupid Val-U Pack!
189
00:07:08,420 --> 00:07:10,532
No, I had those in font groups!
190
00:07:10,556 --> 00:07:12,656
Wait, look at this.
191
00:07:14,360 --> 00:07:16,171
"King's Head Bar and Grill."
192
00:07:16,195 --> 00:07:18,406
Yeah, not a fan of Canterbury Bold.
193
00:07:18,430 --> 00:07:21,076
No, under "50% off fish and chips."
194
00:07:21,100 --> 00:07:23,044
"Trivia Contest Grand Prize...
195
00:07:23,068 --> 00:07:25,814
a trip for two to London
for the royal wedding."
196
00:07:25,838 --> 00:07:26,915
This is it.
197
00:07:26,939 --> 00:07:28,250
We got to win this for Mom, Brick.
198
00:07:28,274 --> 00:07:29,584
It's everything she loves...
199
00:07:29,608 --> 00:07:33,255
weddings, the royal family,
a trip to actual London?
200
00:07:33,279 --> 00:07:36,525
This would make up for a lot of
inflatable foot baths.
201
00:07:36,549 --> 00:07:39,094
True, but this is us we're talking about.
202
00:07:39,118 --> 00:07:41,196
Winning something?
You think we even have a shot?
203
00:07:41,220 --> 00:07:42,664
I always think I have a shot.
204
00:07:42,688 --> 00:07:44,688
I'm usually wrong,
but let's do it anyway.
205
00:07:48,994 --> 00:07:51,072
I cannot believe you have a fake ID.
206
00:07:51,096 --> 00:07:53,141
Font Club is very underfunded.
207
00:07:53,165 --> 00:07:54,409
That's how we used to raise money...
208
00:07:54,433 --> 00:07:56,645
our treasurer has low scruples
and a gift.
209
00:07:56,669 --> 00:07:59,147
Well, he did, until he got expelled.
210
00:07:59,171 --> 00:08:02,484
Yeah, but come on, Brick,
you don't exactly look 32.
211
00:08:03,341 --> 00:08:04,986
Look at me from here to here.
212
00:08:05,010 --> 00:08:06,588
I see it now.
213
00:08:06,612 --> 00:08:08,890
I voted in the last election.
214
00:08:08,914 --> 00:08:10,158
Welcome to King's Head.
215
00:08:10,182 --> 00:08:12,194
We got a special tonight
on $2 whiskey shots.
216
00:08:12,218 --> 00:08:14,129
Oh, no, no, no. My ID is fake.
217
00:08:14,153 --> 00:08:17,532
Two ginger ales and we'll try
the 50% off fish and chips.
218
00:08:17,556 --> 00:08:19,201
I think you're gonna want to
roll out the red carpet
219
00:08:19,225 --> 00:08:22,659
when you see that we have
a coupon from the Val-U Pack.
220
00:08:26,027 --> 00:08:27,600
_
221
00:08:31,032 --> 00:08:33,032
_
222
00:08:34,659 --> 00:08:36,659
_
223
00:08:36,672 --> 00:08:37,906
_
224
00:08:42,448 --> 00:08:44,192
You don't need to find Axl.
225
00:08:44,216 --> 00:08:45,360
Just let me do it. I'm the man.
226
00:08:45,384 --> 00:08:47,095
Just let me bring home
the plumbing supplies.
227
00:08:47,119 --> 00:08:48,396
Don't go bugging him in Denver.
228
00:08:48,420 --> 00:08:49,731
Denver?
229
00:08:49,755 --> 00:08:52,300
What? I didn't say Denver.
230
00:08:52,324 --> 00:08:53,868
Get your hearing checked, lady. Heh.
231
00:08:54,934 --> 00:08:58,106
When I said Denver,
I meant Denver omelet.
232
00:08:58,130 --> 00:08:59,241
What?
233
00:08:59,265 --> 00:09:01,509
Yeah, he likes those now.
He likes Denver omelets.
234
00:09:01,533 --> 00:09:03,478
Okay, why are you telling me this?
235
00:09:03,502 --> 00:09:06,081
Boy, you say you like conversation.
236
00:09:06,105 --> 00:09:08,049
But when I go to start one,
I get shot down.
237
00:09:08,073 --> 00:09:10,418
Why are we talking about Denver omelets?
238
00:09:10,442 --> 00:09:12,187
I don't know. I just...
I just think it's interesting.
239
00:09:12,211 --> 00:09:13,855
Why is it called that?
240
00:09:13,879 --> 00:09:15,423
It's got ham and peppers...
241
00:09:15,447 --> 00:09:17,459
nothing about that screams Denver to me.
242
00:09:17,483 --> 00:09:19,561
Needs to be called a Western omelet.
243
00:09:19,585 --> 00:09:21,196
How'd Denver end up with it?
244
00:09:21,220 --> 00:09:23,531
I mean, I know it's out west,
but it's not that far out west.
245
00:09:23,555 --> 00:09:26,501
Why isn't it called the Reno
omelet or the Phoenix omelet?
246
00:09:26,525 --> 00:09:28,837
I know a lot of places
have food named after 'em...
247
00:09:28,861 --> 00:09:32,874
Buffalo wings, Texas toast,
Boston baked beans.
248
00:09:32,898 --> 00:09:35,877
Those make sense, but Denver omelet?
249
00:09:36,476 --> 00:09:38,535
I don't get it.
250
00:09:41,440 --> 00:09:43,018
The Seattle Space Needle.
251
00:09:43,042 --> 00:09:45,720
Correct! Another 10 points for Heck Yeah.
252
00:09:45,744 --> 00:09:47,989
Mmm, Brick, you are killing it!
253
00:09:48,013 --> 00:09:49,357
See? You made fun of me,
254
00:09:49,381 --> 00:09:51,593
but spending a year in front of
the microfiche really paid off.
255
00:09:51,617 --> 00:09:52,927
- Yep.
- And to think I might've wasted it
256
00:09:52,951 --> 00:09:55,563
- forging social bonds with my peers.
- Yeah.
257
00:09:55,587 --> 00:09:57,732
Okay, right now, we have a three-way tie
258
00:09:57,756 --> 00:10:02,804
between Figgy Puddings,
Colts Rule, and Heck Yeah!
259
00:10:02,828 --> 00:10:06,741
All right, this is it... final question.
260
00:10:06,765 --> 00:10:10,045
"What 1932 Marx Brothers movie
261
00:10:10,069 --> 00:10:13,948
is also a slang term for 'nonsense'?"
262
00:10:13,972 --> 00:10:15,650
Why'd you do that?!
263
00:10:15,674 --> 00:10:16,918
'Cause you always know the answer
264
00:10:16,942 --> 00:10:17,986
and you're slow on the buzzer.
265
00:10:18,010 --> 00:10:19,554
Well, I might not know this one.
266
00:10:19,578 --> 00:10:21,489
Um, Malarkey?
267
00:10:21,513 --> 00:10:23,224
Claptrap? Poppycock?
268
00:10:23,248 --> 00:10:24,626
10 seconds...
269
00:10:25,400 --> 00:10:26,861
"Horse Feathers"?
270
00:10:26,885 --> 00:10:28,430
Correct!
271
00:10:28,454 --> 00:10:29,864
Heck Yeah wins!
272
00:10:29,888 --> 00:10:31,566
Oh, my God, Mom's going to England!
273
00:10:31,590 --> 00:10:32,901
- We did it! We won!
- She's gonna see the Queen!
274
00:10:32,925 --> 00:10:34,433
- Ahh!
- Is this what sports people feel like?!
275
00:10:34,457 --> 00:10:36,905
Yeah! Ahh!
276
00:10:36,929 --> 00:10:38,973
Congratulations.
You guys really know your stuff.
277
00:10:38,997 --> 00:10:40,542
Oh, thank you, thank you!
278
00:10:40,566 --> 00:10:42,032
It is all because of my brother who...
279
00:10:43,802 --> 00:10:45,313
I'm sorry, what is this?
280
00:10:45,337 --> 00:10:46,715
Uh, your prize.
281
00:10:46,739 --> 00:10:49,217
A, uh, $20 bar tab courtesy of
King's Head Bar and Grill.
282
00:10:49,241 --> 00:10:50,852
No, no, no, we won the big prize.
283
00:10:50,876 --> 00:10:52,020
We're going to England.
284
00:10:52,044 --> 00:10:54,656
Oh, no. Tonight's just the semifinal.
285
00:10:54,680 --> 00:10:57,492
All the bars in town
have their own trivia contest.
286
00:10:57,516 --> 00:11:00,628
And those winners will compete
in the finals tomorrow night.
287
00:11:00,652 --> 00:11:03,932
If you win that, then you go to England.
288
00:11:09,228 --> 00:11:11,373
I'm gonna need something
stronger than this.
289
00:11:11,397 --> 00:11:13,698
Hit me with a Shirley Temple!
290
00:11:22,131 --> 00:11:23,165
_
291
00:11:23,232 --> 00:11:25,311
- _
- Ugh!
292
00:11:25,335 --> 00:11:27,579
I am too excited to sleep.
293
00:11:27,603 --> 00:11:28,914
And a little bit nervous.
294
00:11:28,938 --> 00:11:30,950
I've never made it to
a second round before.
295
00:11:30,974 --> 00:11:32,952
Don't worry.
I think we've got a good shot.
296
00:11:32,976 --> 00:11:35,187
Oh, can you imagine Mom's face
297
00:11:35,211 --> 00:11:37,723
when we give her
an actual trip to London?
298
00:11:37,747 --> 00:11:39,124
I know.
299
00:11:39,148 --> 00:11:42,294
Home of Charles Dickens,
Sherlock Holmes...
300
00:11:42,318 --> 00:11:45,097
oh, and I can't wait to hear
one of their ambulances.
301
00:11:45,121 --> 00:11:47,833
Wee-oo, wee-oo, wee-oo!
302
00:11:47,857 --> 00:11:49,735
What did you just say?
303
00:11:49,759 --> 00:11:52,071
Wee-oo, wee-oo, wee...
304
00:11:52,095 --> 00:11:55,207
Nope. The part about you going to London.
305
00:11:55,231 --> 00:11:57,609
Oh, well, it's a trip for two
and Dad won't want to go.
306
00:11:57,633 --> 00:11:59,345
He says we beat 'em in 1776
307
00:11:59,369 --> 00:12:00,913
and he doesn't want
anything to do with 'em.
308
00:12:00,937 --> 00:12:03,782
Brick, this trip is about
weddings and romance.
309
00:12:03,806 --> 00:12:07,319
Clearly Mom is gonna want to
take her one and only daughter.
310
00:12:07,343 --> 00:12:10,422
Besides, you're busy now
with your Val-U Pack.
311
00:12:10,446 --> 00:12:11,657
You know another one's gonna come
312
00:12:11,681 --> 00:12:13,192
and you won't be here to get it.
313
00:12:13,216 --> 00:12:15,094
Well, it's Mother's Day,
314
00:12:15,118 --> 00:12:17,930
and our mother can decide to
bring whoever she wants.
315
00:12:17,954 --> 00:12:20,666
And if a coupon for
10% off a deck sanding
316
00:12:20,690 --> 00:12:23,435
happens to find its way
into her purse, so be it.
317
00:12:28,798 --> 00:12:31,243
Frankie, I'm so glad I caught you.
318
00:12:31,267 --> 00:12:32,778
Could you bring in our mail on Monday?
319
00:12:32,802 --> 00:12:34,346
Ron's taking us all to Gatlinburg
320
00:12:34,370 --> 00:12:35,681
for Mother's Day weekend.
321
00:12:35,705 --> 00:12:38,784
We're staying at that hotel with
the giant walk-in totem pole.
322
00:12:38,808 --> 00:12:41,120
It's nice to mix in some culture.
323
00:12:41,144 --> 00:12:42,654
Hey, bring me back some taffy
324
00:12:42,678 --> 00:12:44,490
and I won't rifle through
your drawers while you're gone.
325
00:12:44,514 --> 00:12:46,425
Oh, you!
326
00:12:46,449 --> 00:12:48,694
- So, how's everything with you guys?
- Oh, we're good.
327
00:12:48,718 --> 00:12:50,529
Haven't seen much of Axl
'cause he's always in and out.
328
00:12:50,553 --> 00:12:51,964
And Mike's up to something
329
00:12:51,988 --> 00:12:54,833
'cause he's obviously lying
to me, but he's so bad at it.
330
00:12:54,857 --> 00:12:56,502
I think he's planning something
for Mother's Day.
331
00:12:56,526 --> 00:12:57,903
Oh, that's great!
332
00:12:57,927 --> 00:12:59,138
No, it's not.
333
00:12:59,162 --> 00:13:00,906
He's the worst gift giver of all time.
334
00:13:00,930 --> 00:13:02,541
It's gonna be horrible.
It's always horrible.
335
00:13:02,565 --> 00:13:04,643
Aww. Poor Mike.
336
00:13:05,701 --> 00:13:08,447
You know what, you're right. He does try.
337
00:13:08,471 --> 00:13:11,316
I feel bad 'cause I'm not good
at hiding my disappointment.
338
00:13:11,340 --> 00:13:13,452
But, you know, it's hard to
pretend to be excited
339
00:13:13,476 --> 00:13:15,387
when you open the box
and it's yellow pants.
340
00:13:15,411 --> 00:13:16,555
I'm not Meryl Streep.
341
00:13:16,579 --> 00:13:18,390
I hear you.
342
00:13:18,414 --> 00:13:19,925
Sometimes, you wish you could
just see the gift first
343
00:13:19,949 --> 00:13:21,727
so you can practice your reaction.
344
00:13:21,751 --> 00:13:23,128
Yeah.
345
00:13:23,152 --> 00:13:25,531
Hold on. You might be onto something.
346
00:13:25,555 --> 00:13:28,200
If I knew what my sucky gift was
ahead of time,
347
00:13:28,224 --> 00:13:31,437
I could pre-disappoint myself
and fake being grateful.
348
00:13:31,461 --> 00:13:33,105
Let me try it.
349
00:13:33,129 --> 00:13:34,506
Oh, look!
350
00:13:34,530 --> 00:13:37,209
Third notice on the gas bill. I love it!
351
00:13:37,233 --> 00:13:40,245
Frankie, you're so funny.
352
00:13:40,269 --> 00:13:42,403
Seriously, you need to pay that.
353
00:13:45,875 --> 00:13:48,754
Even against fiercer
competition in the finals,
354
00:13:48,778 --> 00:13:51,056
with knowledge and a pretty
good Shirley Temple buzz,
355
00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:52,558
Brick was on fire.
356
00:13:52,582 --> 00:13:54,259
The Yalta Conference.
357
00:13:54,283 --> 00:13:55,794
"Afternoon Delight."
358
00:13:55,818 --> 00:13:56,762
Moms Mabley.
359
00:13:56,786 --> 00:13:58,297
The Green Bay Packers.
360
00:13:58,321 --> 00:13:59,765
"Ring around the collar."
361
00:13:59,789 --> 00:14:01,867
Correct! 10 point for Heck Yeah!
362
00:14:01,891 --> 00:14:04,403
Okay, we're down to our final round.
363
00:14:04,427 --> 00:14:05,838
So, let's check the score.
364
00:14:05,862 --> 00:14:09,141
In, uh, third place,
with 200 points, London Calling.
365
00:14:09,165 --> 00:14:11,243
- Whoo!
- In second with 205,
366
00:14:11,267 --> 00:14:12,711
Trivia De Havilland.
367
00:14:12,735 --> 00:14:16,849
And on top with 215 points, Heck Yeah.
368
00:14:16,873 --> 00:14:18,817
Questions are now worth 20 points.
369
00:14:18,841 --> 00:14:20,152
So it's anybody's game.
370
00:14:20,176 --> 00:14:22,087
Ooh, I really have to go to the bathroom.
371
00:14:22,111 --> 00:14:23,345
- Now?!
- Well, you know we can't
372
00:14:23,370 --> 00:14:24,323
use the kid bathroom
373
00:14:24,347 --> 00:14:25,724
and Mom was in hers when we left.
374
00:14:25,748 --> 00:14:27,493
I have been holding it in for two hours.
375
00:14:27,517 --> 00:14:28,794
But you can't leave now!
376
00:14:28,818 --> 00:14:30,129
Well, that ship has sailed, Brick.
377
00:14:30,153 --> 00:14:31,463
And it is coming into port.
378
00:14:31,487 --> 00:14:32,698
You've been answering everything anyway.
379
00:14:32,722 --> 00:14:34,399
I'll be back as quick as I can.
380
00:14:34,423 --> 00:14:37,136
All right, next question.
381
00:14:37,160 --> 00:14:42,174
"What show won the Tony Award
for Best Musical in 1975
382
00:14:42,198 --> 00:14:45,210
and how many total Tonys did it win?"
383
00:14:45,234 --> 00:14:46,812
"The Wiz"!
384
00:14:46,836 --> 00:14:48,213
And it won 7 Tonys.
385
00:14:48,237 --> 00:14:49,281
Correct!
386
00:14:49,305 --> 00:14:52,151
Trivia De Havilland is in the lead!
387
00:14:52,175 --> 00:14:55,521
Okay, we are down to the final question.
388
00:14:55,545 --> 00:14:59,658
So for all the marbles
and the trip to London...
389
00:14:59,682 --> 00:15:02,961
"In the Taylor Swift song
'Stay Beautiful, '
390
00:15:02,985 --> 00:15:05,864
whose eyes are 'like a jungle'?
391
00:15:09,659 --> 00:15:11,327
_
392
00:15:11,328 --> 00:15:12,781
_
393
00:15:12,806 --> 00:15:14,711
"In the Taylor Swift song
'Stay Beautiful'...
394
00:15:14,712 --> 00:15:16,712
_
395
00:15:16,833 --> 00:15:18,833
_
396
00:15:19,669 --> 00:15:22,414
..."whose eyes are 'like a jungle'"?
397
00:15:23,506 --> 00:15:24,816
Zac Efron?
398
00:15:24,840 --> 00:15:27,419
Sorry, incorrect
399
00:15:27,443 --> 00:15:28,954
Anybody else?
400
00:15:28,978 --> 00:15:30,945
15 seconds...
401
00:15:34,217 --> 00:15:39,431
The answer to that question
about Taylor Swift...
402
00:15:39,455 --> 00:15:41,066
the singer...
403
00:15:41,090 --> 00:15:42,717
would be...
404
00:15:44,260 --> 00:15:46,004
Sue! Whose "eyes are like a jungle"?!
405
00:15:46,028 --> 00:15:47,806
Cory! Cory's eyes are like a jungle!
406
00:15:47,830 --> 00:15:50,175
That is correct! Heck Yeah wins!
407
00:15:50,199 --> 00:15:51,610
Yeah!
408
00:15:51,634 --> 00:15:52,978
Oh, my God! I'm going to London!
409
00:15:53,002 --> 00:15:54,646
Mom is going to London
and she's taking me!
410
00:15:54,670 --> 00:15:55,948
Except she's not 'cause she's taking me!
411
00:15:55,972 --> 00:15:57,037
Yeah!
412
00:15:58,265 --> 00:16:00,052
Hi, uh, sorry,
413
00:16:00,076 --> 00:16:02,254
but, uh, there seems to be a problem.
414
00:16:02,278 --> 00:16:04,690
One of our judges saw you
using your phone.
415
00:16:04,714 --> 00:16:06,558
And as we stated
at the beginning of the night,
416
00:16:06,582 --> 00:16:09,461
it's against the rules to
look up answers on your phone.
417
00:16:09,485 --> 00:16:11,096
Oh, but we weren't looking up answers.
418
00:16:11,120 --> 00:16:12,831
We were just texting.
Yeah, I can explain.
419
00:16:12,855 --> 00:16:14,466
See, the kid bathroom doesn't work
420
00:16:14,490 --> 00:16:16,235
and my brother went ahead
and flushed so...
421
00:16:16,259 --> 00:16:18,537
Sorry. We have a no-phones-out policy.
422
00:16:18,561 --> 00:16:20,806
So I'm afraid you're disqualified.
423
00:16:20,830 --> 00:16:24,977
That means our winners are
Trivia De Havilland!
424
00:16:25,001 --> 00:16:27,501
Yes!
425
00:16:29,839 --> 00:16:31,505
Okay, so what are we gonna get Mom?
426
00:16:35,970 --> 00:16:37,591
So, in order to
spare my family's feelings,
427
00:16:37,616 --> 00:16:38,927
I had to find the crap gift
428
00:16:38,951 --> 00:16:40,895
they were planning on giving me
for Mother's Day.
429
00:16:40,919 --> 00:16:43,832
Unfortunately, they may not
have been good at buying gifts,
430
00:16:43,856 --> 00:16:46,489
but they were sure good at hiding 'em.
431
00:16:50,329 --> 00:16:52,329
_
432
00:16:55,931 --> 00:16:57,931
_
433
00:16:57,991 --> 00:16:59,991
_
434
00:17:04,376 --> 00:17:06,154
Ahh!
435
00:17:06,178 --> 00:17:07,889
What are you doing down there?
436
00:17:08,302 --> 00:17:11,192
Oh, well, I woke up 'cause I was hot.
437
00:17:11,216 --> 00:17:13,862
And I was gonna put
a Nutty Buddy under my boobs.
438
00:17:13,886 --> 00:17:15,930
And then I remembered
it's cooler in your closet
439
00:17:15,954 --> 00:17:17,699
because of the vent.
440
00:17:17,723 --> 00:17:18,933
Why are you up and dressed?
441
00:17:18,957 --> 00:17:20,802
Uh...
442
00:17:20,826 --> 00:17:22,203
Are you going to the gym again?
443
00:17:22,227 --> 00:17:23,905
Yes.
444
00:17:25,027 --> 00:17:26,507
Yes, I am.
445
00:17:32,070 --> 00:17:34,449
Happy Mother's Day!
446
00:17:34,473 --> 00:17:37,719
Oh! Is that today? Yay!
447
00:17:37,743 --> 00:17:39,621
Hey, listen, I know we haven't
always delivered
448
00:17:39,645 --> 00:17:40,788
in the Mother's Day department.
449
00:17:40,812 --> 00:17:43,558
But this year, we had an amazing idea.
450
00:17:43,582 --> 00:17:46,661
We entered a trivia contest
where the grand prize was
451
00:17:46,685 --> 00:17:50,365
a trip to London
for Prince Harry's wedding.
452
00:17:50,389 --> 00:17:53,398
Oh, my God, I'm going to
the royal wedding?!
453
00:17:53,423 --> 00:17:54,800
Sadly, that did not pan out.
454
00:17:54,824 --> 00:17:55,935
Oh.
455
00:17:55,959 --> 00:17:57,803
So then we thought, "Wouldn't it be great
456
00:17:57,827 --> 00:18:01,340
if Mom woke up on Mother's Day
and the toilet was all fixed?"
457
00:18:01,364 --> 00:18:04,911
Well, it's not London,
but that is really sweet.
458
00:18:04,935 --> 00:18:06,979
Sadly, that did not pan out, either.
459
00:18:07,003 --> 00:18:09,804
But we finally came up with something.
460
00:18:12,342 --> 00:18:15,188
Where have you been hiding this?
461
00:18:15,212 --> 00:18:17,490
No, seriously.
Where have you been hiding it?
462
00:18:17,514 --> 00:18:20,059
Well, I am sure that whatever it is,
463
00:18:20,083 --> 00:18:22,884
I am going to love...
464
00:18:25,055 --> 00:18:27,867
Okay, seriously, nothing?
465
00:18:27,891 --> 00:18:29,669
You're giving me nothing?
466
00:18:29,693 --> 00:18:31,537
Are you kidding me?
467
00:18:31,561 --> 00:18:33,472
This is an all-time low.
468
00:18:33,496 --> 00:18:36,142
I can't even pretend
that this is a decent gift.
469
00:18:36,166 --> 00:18:37,677
I'm sorry. I don't know
how Meryl Streep does it.
470
00:18:37,701 --> 00:18:39,879
And if you tell me,
"Oh, this is a box full of love"
471
00:18:39,903 --> 00:18:41,314
or "It's to put my wishes in,"
472
00:18:41,338 --> 00:18:43,382
I am going to tell you to shove it.
473
00:18:43,406 --> 00:18:45,284
Hang on. There is a gift.
474
00:18:45,308 --> 00:18:47,019
It's just not one
that we can give you right now.
475
00:18:47,043 --> 00:18:48,454
But in a week...
476
00:18:48,478 --> 00:18:50,790
I'm gonna bring my big TV
out to the family room...
477
00:18:50,814 --> 00:18:53,326
And we're all gonna watch
the royal wedding with you.
478
00:18:54,033 --> 00:18:55,361
Really?
479
00:18:55,385 --> 00:18:57,597
You guys are seriously gonna
get up at the crack of dawn
480
00:18:57,621 --> 00:18:58,798
and watch it with me?!
481
00:18:58,822 --> 00:19:00,733
Not just that.
We're not gonna make fun of it.
482
00:19:00,757 --> 00:19:02,168
- Or you.
- Or the hats.
483
00:19:02,192 --> 00:19:03,869
- Or talk during it.
- Or read during it.
484
00:19:03,893 --> 00:19:06,172
Or call it "lame" or "snore"
485
00:19:06,196 --> 00:19:09,675
or pretend to gouge our eyes out... Axl.
486
00:19:09,699 --> 00:19:12,311
And we're all gonna stay awake
through all of it.
487
00:19:12,802 --> 00:19:14,814
Even the waving on the balcony part?
488
00:19:14,838 --> 00:19:17,883
Yep. And I'm even gonna study up
so I know who everybody is.
489
00:19:17,907 --> 00:19:19,585
Sue's making me royal flash cards.
490
00:19:19,850 --> 00:19:22,255
Oh, you guys.
491
00:19:22,279 --> 00:19:24,457
Oh, this is the best gift ever!
492
00:19:24,481 --> 00:19:27,093
And I am not even pretending or anything.
493
00:19:27,117 --> 00:19:28,361
I mean, your dad was acting so weird
494
00:19:28,385 --> 00:19:29,996
that I thought it was gonna be
something horrible.
495
00:19:30,020 --> 00:19:31,764
But I-I love it.
496
00:19:31,788 --> 00:19:33,388
I really love it.
497
00:19:34,824 --> 00:19:36,057
Ooh, your boobs are freezing.
498
00:19:38,895 --> 00:19:41,440
And for once, they actually delivered.
499
00:19:41,464 --> 00:19:43,709
It was the best Mother's Day yet.
500
00:19:43,733 --> 00:19:45,711
Oh, my God, her dress is gorgeous.
501
00:19:45,735 --> 00:19:47,747
Isn't her dress gorgeous? Stunning.
502
00:19:47,771 --> 00:19:49,849
You know, she had a little more
leeway with her dress
503
00:19:49,873 --> 00:19:51,784
'cause Harry's only
fifth in line to the throne.
504
00:19:51,808 --> 00:19:53,619
- Really?
- Fascinating.
505
00:19:53,643 --> 00:19:54,887
Hey, I've been there!
506
00:19:54,911 --> 00:19:56,756
You were at Windsor Castle?!
507
00:19:56,780 --> 00:19:58,658
No, no, no, no, no, no.
The bar across the street.
508
00:19:58,682 --> 00:20:00,526
I puked right where
that guard is standing.
509
00:20:00,550 --> 00:20:02,495
Can I just say this is great?
510
00:20:02,519 --> 00:20:04,196
I get to watch the thing I want to watch
511
00:20:04,220 --> 00:20:06,532
and I get to do it with my whole family.
512
00:20:06,556 --> 00:20:09,869
You know, these heat-n-serve
scones are actually pretty good.
513
00:20:09,893 --> 00:20:11,070
I'm gonna microwave up some more.
514
00:20:11,094 --> 00:20:13,661
Anybody want another? Sure.
515
00:20:15,231 --> 00:20:18,177
Okay, this guy getting out of the car is
516
00:20:18,201 --> 00:20:21,213
the, uh, Earl of Wessex.
517
00:20:21,237 --> 00:20:23,549
Yeah, he's the youngest son of the Queen.
518
00:20:23,573 --> 00:20:25,418
And a keen sports fan.
519
00:20:25,442 --> 00:20:26,752
Oh, well done.
520
00:20:26,776 --> 00:20:28,054
Mm-hmm.
521
00:20:28,078 --> 00:20:30,690
Yes, I think I've earned myself
a celebratory ale
522
00:20:30,714 --> 00:20:32,792
from Yon Frugal Hoosier.
523
00:20:32,816 --> 00:20:35,917
It's okay 'cause it's afternoon there.
524
00:20:38,588 --> 00:20:39,799
What's up?
525
00:20:39,823 --> 00:20:40,800
I got it.
526
00:20:40,824 --> 00:20:42,268
What?
527
00:20:42,292 --> 00:20:43,803
They offered me the Denver job.
528
00:20:43,827 --> 00:20:45,071
It's mine if I want it.
529
00:20:45,095 --> 00:20:47,104
What job?
530
00:20:47,997 --> 00:20:50,142
Uh...
38042
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