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1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
AmericasCardroom.com brings poker back
Million Dollar Sunday Tournament every Sunday
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00:00:27,037 --> 00:00:32,037
Subtitles by explosiveskull
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00:01:18,185 --> 00:01:21,186
No, you did not give my room
to some bum while I was at school.
4
00:01:21,188 --> 00:01:23,487
No, it's just unbelievable.
Is your nest that empty?
5
00:01:23,489 --> 00:01:25,757
Are you just that pathetic?
6
00:01:25,759 --> 00:01:27,428
Jenny, darling, I've asked you
not to speak to me that way!
7
00:01:28,661 --> 00:01:30,594
Oh.
8
00:01:30,596 --> 00:01:31,362
There's people in this world
that need our help...
9
00:01:31,364 --> 00:01:33,198
What is that?
10
00:01:33,200 --> 00:01:34,269
We should try to help
them as much as we can.
11
00:01:36,269 --> 00:01:37,668
You've got to be
fucking kidding me?!
12
00:01:37,670 --> 00:01:39,638
Mom!
13
00:01:39,640 --> 00:01:40,805
I'm really sorry,
you can have your room back.
14
00:01:40,807 --> 00:01:41,873
Yeah, yeah.
15
00:01:41,875 --> 00:01:42,876
No, no, no!
16
00:01:44,010 --> 00:01:44,946
Mom, she's using my hairbrush!
17
00:01:46,346 --> 00:01:47,478
Oh my God and now
you're naked.
18
00:01:47,480 --> 00:01:49,314
You're naked. Okay.
19
00:01:49,316 --> 00:01:49,917
Mom, she's using
my hairbrush.
20
00:02:17,177 --> 00:02:19,378
You know we're going to have to burn
everything in that room now, right?
21
00:02:19,380 --> 00:02:21,716
She's probably got lice and herpes
and God only knows what else.
22
00:02:54,248 --> 00:02:56,548
God did not put us on
this earth to endure suffering.
23
00:02:56,550 --> 00:02:59,050
He put us on this earth,
he put us here
24
00:02:59,052 --> 00:03:02,486
to receive salvation
from our Lord Jesus Christ!
25
00:03:02,488 --> 00:03:03,491
Because a great
distress is coming...
26
00:03:20,606 --> 00:03:22,908
What you doing here, girl
27
00:03:22,910 --> 00:03:25,213
Don't tell me, that spacey rich
bitch finally got tired of you?
28
00:03:25,979 --> 00:03:27,679
Claire was sweet.
29
00:03:27,681 --> 00:03:29,350
Her prodigal daughter
returned. Jenny.
30
00:03:30,717 --> 00:03:33,217
What did I tell you about
using words like prodigal?
31
00:03:33,219 --> 00:03:35,719
Keep talkin' like that
and you can take a one way bus
32
00:03:35,721 --> 00:03:37,154
right back to that small town
you ran away from.
33
00:03:37,156 --> 00:03:37,658
Shut up.
34
00:03:40,326 --> 00:03:42,193
Damn.
35
00:03:42,195 --> 00:03:44,261
How is it you manage to find
all the wealthy do-gooders
36
00:03:44,263 --> 00:03:46,264
this city has to offer
37
00:03:46,266 --> 00:03:49,134
and I meet all the
freaks and assholes?
38
00:03:49,136 --> 00:03:51,302
I told you to stop seeing that mother
fucker you're always crashing with.
39
00:03:51,304 --> 00:03:52,807
Watch your mouth, girl.
40
00:03:53,506 --> 00:03:55,606
Or you're gonna start
scaring society ladies away.
41
00:03:55,608 --> 00:03:58,009
Oh whatever 'cause
when we're famous,
42
00:03:58,011 --> 00:03:59,944
we're going to be like them.
43
00:03:59,946 --> 00:04:01,949
Oh that's right, when we have our
apartment on the Upper West Side.
44
00:04:02,182 --> 00:04:03,851
Oh and we paint
the walls yellow.
45
00:04:04,417 --> 00:04:07,185
And always have purple flowers
in the kitchen.
46
00:04:07,187 --> 00:04:09,587
Oh and a welcome mat so our guests
know they got a place to be.
47
00:04:09,589 --> 00:04:11,723
But they got to take
their shoes off
48
00:04:11,725 --> 00:04:12,890
'cause you know we don't want
no dirt in our place.
49
00:04:12,892 --> 00:04:13,859
Amen.
50
00:04:18,331 --> 00:04:20,098
Here.
51
00:04:20,100 --> 00:04:21,569
Just tell me when we have
enough for a place.
52
00:04:22,169 --> 00:04:23,191
That's it?
53
00:04:23,970 --> 00:04:26,136
You gotta at least leave me
enough to get a loosey.
54
00:04:26,138 --> 00:04:27,471
I thought you were quitting.
55
00:04:27,473 --> 00:04:28,874
I'll quit when we have a place.
56
00:04:28,876 --> 00:04:29,410
Deal.
57
00:04:37,718 --> 00:04:39,084
Yo I'm goin' fishing
tonight. You in?
58
00:04:39,086 --> 00:04:39,754
Yeah.
59
00:04:42,054 --> 00:04:44,956
Maybe I'll meet the prince who will
sweep me off my feet for once.
60
00:04:44,958 --> 00:04:46,391
Oh girl, you let me know, I'm
gonna be your chambermaid.
61
00:04:46,393 --> 00:04:47,395
Oh whatever.
62
00:04:48,795 --> 00:04:50,398
Fuck, Frank's here.
63
00:05:09,016 --> 00:05:10,949
All right, who's your target?
64
00:05:10,951 --> 00:05:11,552
What about him?
65
00:05:12,586 --> 00:05:14,052
Do you see that
dude's fingernails?
66
00:05:14,054 --> 00:05:15,252
He is a closet psycho.
67
00:05:15,254 --> 00:05:17,055
What about him?
68
00:05:17,057 --> 00:05:19,057
Are you kidding me? No.
69
00:05:19,059 --> 00:05:20,158
Too old.
70
00:05:20,160 --> 00:05:22,160
Too Mafia.
71
00:05:22,162 --> 00:05:23,263
Too ghetto.
72
00:05:24,364 --> 00:05:25,366
Wait, wait, wait him.
73
00:05:26,732 --> 00:05:27,567
He's perfect.
74
00:05:28,569 --> 00:05:30,237
- Good luck.
- Don't need it.
75
00:05:33,574 --> 00:05:34,341
Oh.
76
00:05:35,475 --> 00:05:37,242
Oh my God, I'm so sorry.
77
00:05:37,244 --> 00:05:38,646
Can I just like... oh you're wet.
78
00:05:39,379 --> 00:05:40,579
Just a little, yeah.
79
00:05:40,581 --> 00:05:42,379
I'm sorry. I'm such a klutz.
80
00:05:42,381 --> 00:05:43,451
It's okay. It's okay.
81
00:05:45,352 --> 00:05:46,483
Do you need a drink?
82
00:05:46,485 --> 00:05:47,519
Yes.
83
00:05:47,521 --> 00:05:48,954
Yes, I need a drink.
84
00:05:50,389 --> 00:05:51,855
What are you having?
85
00:05:51,857 --> 00:05:52,927
Um, vodka soda?
86
00:05:54,828 --> 00:05:57,932
Excuse me. Vodka soda please.
And two shots.
87
00:06:01,400 --> 00:06:03,470
So, what's your name, now that
I've put your hands all over you?
88
00:06:05,037 --> 00:06:06,036
Tom.
89
00:06:06,038 --> 00:06:07,072
Tom?
90
00:06:07,074 --> 00:06:08,740
Hailey.
91
00:06:08,742 --> 00:06:10,108
Hi, Hailey. It's
nice to meet you.
92
00:06:10,110 --> 00:06:11,112
Nice to meet you.
93
00:06:11,677 --> 00:06:12,713
Ah.
94
00:06:16,148 --> 00:06:17,214
Cheers.
95
00:06:17,216 --> 00:06:18,382
Cheers.
96
00:06:23,256 --> 00:06:24,357
So what do you do, Tom?
97
00:06:26,593 --> 00:06:27,427
I am...
98
00:06:29,496 --> 00:06:30,464
funeral director.
99
00:06:32,566 --> 00:06:34,098
You're a funeral director?
100
00:06:34,100 --> 00:06:35,435
That's amazing.
101
00:06:36,203 --> 00:06:37,203
And depressing.
102
00:06:39,006 --> 00:06:42,476
Well, that is why I need
a beautiful girl like you to...
103
00:06:44,845 --> 00:06:47,280
help me feel better.
104
00:06:50,249 --> 00:06:51,285
I'm sorry.
105
00:06:55,956 --> 00:06:56,924
Check, please?
106
00:08:20,574 --> 00:08:22,343
Alright, I got it, I got it.
107
00:08:24,174 --> 00:08:25,003
Oh, I'm sorry.
108
00:08:25,478 --> 00:08:26,780
- Nice catch.
- Are you okay?
109
00:08:28,881 --> 00:08:30,583
I'm really sorry. I absolutely was not
looking to see if I was going to...
110
00:08:32,251 --> 00:08:33,587
crush a human being
111
00:08:34,621 --> 00:08:35,823
in my quest to make
a perfect catch.
112
00:08:36,823 --> 00:08:38,391
Luckily, I'm gonna live.
113
00:08:39,059 --> 00:08:39,626
Um...
114
00:08:41,594 --> 00:08:42,629
Are you gonna be around here
for awhile?
115
00:08:44,131 --> 00:08:47,131
I've got my book, a sandwich,
and now I have a bruise,
116
00:08:47,133 --> 00:08:48,999
so where am I going to go?
117
00:08:49,001 --> 00:08:49,768
Dude, let's go!
118
00:08:49,770 --> 00:08:51,105
I'm Callie.
119
00:08:51,838 --> 00:08:52,506
David.
120
00:08:53,774 --> 00:08:54,775
Come on.
121
00:08:54,940 --> 00:08:55,942
Go.
122
00:08:58,911 --> 00:09:00,080
Yo, the Frisbee.
123
00:09:14,261 --> 00:09:15,994
Oh, whoa, sorry.
124
00:09:15,996 --> 00:09:16,961
I didn't mean to startle you.
125
00:09:18,165 --> 00:09:19,400
You look big from down here.
126
00:09:20,232 --> 00:09:21,166
Better?
127
00:09:21,168 --> 00:09:22,102
Yeah.
128
00:09:24,203 --> 00:09:26,004
The book is so good,
it put you to sleep?
129
00:09:26,006 --> 00:09:28,673
Yes, actually.
130
00:09:28,675 --> 00:09:33,443
Well, we're going to go to
Randolph's to get a drink,
131
00:09:33,445 --> 00:09:34,481
you should come with.
132
00:09:37,650 --> 00:09:38,919
No, really, put the guy out of
his misery, come on, let's go.
133
00:09:39,752 --> 00:09:40,985
Dude.
134
00:09:40,987 --> 00:09:41,952
Now you owe me a drink, too.
135
00:09:41,954 --> 00:09:43,187
Come on.
136
00:09:43,189 --> 00:09:44,023
All right.
137
00:09:44,290 --> 00:09:45,159
Here.
138
00:09:45,992 --> 00:09:47,328
- Thanks.
- Sure.
139
00:09:48,694 --> 00:09:50,427
- Avi, this is Callie.
- Nice to meet you, Callie.
140
00:09:50,429 --> 00:09:51,962
That's right.
141
00:09:51,964 --> 00:09:52,599
I remember
your name.
142
00:09:54,034 --> 00:09:56,301
Thank you very much.
143
00:09:56,303 --> 00:09:57,471
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
144
00:09:58,170 --> 00:10:00,907
Okay, I would like
to toast our new friend...
145
00:10:02,843 --> 00:10:05,679
No, let's... to you, David. To not
tackling women to pick them up.
146
00:10:07,046 --> 00:10:10,682
Uh, to Avi, for maybe someday
meeting a real girl
147
00:10:10,684 --> 00:10:12,752
so he doesn't break his hand
jerking off all the time.
148
00:10:15,955 --> 00:10:16,689
Ah.
149
00:10:19,025 --> 00:10:21,960
I will say that crashing into me
was kind of a good move.
150
00:10:21,962 --> 00:10:24,928
Oh, suck it Avi.
151
00:10:24,930 --> 00:10:27,197
No listen, David's ex
was a fake plastic bitch.
152
00:10:27,199 --> 00:10:29,767
Frankly, I'm surprised the man's
got any game left at all.
153
00:10:29,769 --> 00:10:31,369
Dude why are you bringing up
the ex laundry,
154
00:10:31,371 --> 00:10:32,604
we just met this girl.
155
00:10:32,606 --> 00:10:33,674
It's got to come out sometime.
156
00:10:34,907 --> 00:10:37,609
It's alright, I've had my
fair share of shitty exes.
157
00:10:37,611 --> 00:10:40,447
There was this one guy
who had an unfortunate fetish
158
00:10:41,080 --> 00:10:43,313
for teal wigs.
159
00:10:43,315 --> 00:10:46,653
So he wanted you to wear a wig?
160
00:10:48,154 --> 00:10:48,923
Yeah, yeah it was weird.
161
00:10:50,055 --> 00:10:51,224
Avi, you're up.
162
00:10:53,126 --> 00:10:55,426
I think we should move on.
163
00:10:55,428 --> 00:10:57,294
Because he doesn't have
any stories about women
164
00:10:57,296 --> 00:10:58,199
because he hasn't had one yet.
165
00:11:01,635 --> 00:11:03,934
Oh!
166
00:11:03,936 --> 00:11:07,572
He's no better with shuffle
board than he is with a Frisbee.
167
00:11:07,574 --> 00:11:09,640
Hey, no I believe Avi
threw that Frisbee,
168
00:11:09,642 --> 00:11:11,545
and I'm the one who made
the magnificent catch.
169
00:11:17,983 --> 00:11:19,052
How'd you get so good at this?
170
00:11:20,654 --> 00:11:22,489
I grew up in a tiny town,
you get good at weird things.
171
00:11:23,223 --> 00:11:24,757
Well, shit. Your game.
172
00:11:25,925 --> 00:11:27,524
What's my prize?
173
00:11:27,526 --> 00:11:29,027
Hmm...
174
00:11:29,029 --> 00:11:30,431
I play for tacos.
175
00:11:30,863 --> 00:11:33,197
Oh, I know exactly
where we're going to go.
176
00:11:33,199 --> 00:11:33,733
Yeah?
177
00:11:34,233 --> 00:11:35,133
Yep, follow me, come on.
178
00:11:35,135 --> 00:11:35,703
Okay.
179
00:11:42,909 --> 00:11:44,778
This is literally the best taco
I've ever eaten.
180
00:11:45,779 --> 00:11:47,177
- Yeah?
- Mhm.
181
00:11:47,179 --> 00:11:48,613
Taco truck tacos?
182
00:11:48,615 --> 00:11:49,550
Delicious.
183
00:11:53,185 --> 00:11:55,355
Whoa. You don't fuck
around, do you?
184
00:12:07,900 --> 00:12:09,670
So where do you live?
185
00:12:10,670 --> 00:12:11,639
Oh...
186
00:12:11,905 --> 00:12:14,371
Um, uh...
187
00:12:14,373 --> 00:12:17,274
Bumblefuck Brooklyn.
188
00:12:17,276 --> 00:12:19,076
It takes me like an
hour to get anywhere.
189
00:12:19,078 --> 00:12:20,477
Ugh, I would hate that.
190
00:12:20,479 --> 00:12:22,379
- Yeah?
- Mhm.
191
00:12:22,381 --> 00:12:23,516
What are you, one of those
Financial District guys
192
00:12:24,583 --> 00:12:25,852
making east of the
river less cool?
193
00:12:27,020 --> 00:12:28,251
Is that what you think of me?
194
00:12:28,253 --> 00:12:32,456
Finance? Really?
195
00:12:32,458 --> 00:12:34,225
Alright, alright, I'm sorry.
196
00:12:34,227 --> 00:12:36,760
So not finance but maybe
something in commercial?
197
00:12:36,762 --> 00:12:38,062
Graphic design?
198
00:12:38,064 --> 00:12:38,198
Advertising?
199
00:12:40,500 --> 00:12:42,265
Fuck!
200
00:12:42,267 --> 00:12:44,402
Oh shit, I'm right?
You work in advertising?
201
00:12:44,404 --> 00:12:46,870
Well close, it's
branding actually.
202
00:12:46,872 --> 00:12:48,673
Branding?
203
00:12:48,675 --> 00:12:51,743
Oh well, when the masses aren't
buying into a product anymore
204
00:12:51,745 --> 00:12:53,477
they call in the master
to make it cool again.
205
00:12:53,479 --> 00:12:55,846
Oh, so you're the reason
206
00:12:55,848 --> 00:12:58,115
that girls spend their money on shit
when they can't pay their rent?
207
00:12:58,117 --> 00:12:59,616
Hey, don't shoot the messenger.
208
00:12:59,618 --> 00:13:01,119
Okay.
209
00:13:01,121 --> 00:13:03,790
Well, maybe you can put me
in one of your commercials.
210
00:13:04,089 --> 00:13:05,222
You're an actress?
211
00:13:05,224 --> 00:13:07,057
Um, kind of. I want to be.
212
00:13:07,059 --> 00:13:08,625
Oh no, no, no.
213
00:13:08,627 --> 00:13:11,095
See if you're one of my clients
I would tell you to say
214
00:13:11,097 --> 00:13:13,663
that you're a serious actress
who's working on her craft
215
00:13:13,665 --> 00:13:16,033
and ready to hit it big
when opportunity strikes.
216
00:13:16,035 --> 00:13:17,503
Did you just brand me?
217
00:13:17,603 --> 00:13:21,371
Ah, sorry it's a force of habit.
218
00:13:21,373 --> 00:13:23,541
But it sounded
pretty good, right?
219
00:13:23,543 --> 00:13:25,913
Hmm... hit it big when
the opportunity strikes...
220
00:13:32,886 --> 00:13:35,452
Wait, wait, wait, this isn't
because you think I can get you
221
00:13:35,454 --> 00:13:36,990
like an acting job
or something right?
222
00:13:37,723 --> 00:13:39,657
I mean I'm not that
cool or big or...
223
00:13:39,659 --> 00:13:40,494
Shut up.
224
00:13:51,538 --> 00:13:53,171
I would love to live
around here someday.
225
00:13:53,173 --> 00:13:54,971
Yeah?
226
00:13:54,973 --> 00:13:56,908
You know we're famous for
the eight dollar cacao bar,
227
00:13:56,910 --> 00:13:58,042
that tastes like chalk.
228
00:13:58,044 --> 00:14:00,477
Sounds dreamy.
229
00:14:00,479 --> 00:14:01,447
So, is this is your train?
230
00:14:03,550 --> 00:14:05,352
What? Did I tire
you out already?
231
00:14:09,722 --> 00:14:11,391
We could meet for
dinner tomorrow.
232
00:14:12,858 --> 00:14:14,127
- Tomorrow?
- Yeah.
233
00:14:14,993 --> 00:14:15,828
I'll text you the plan tomorrow.
234
00:14:16,996 --> 00:14:17,798
Okay.
235
00:14:22,301 --> 00:14:25,536
Wow, what the fuck is that?
236
00:14:25,538 --> 00:14:27,270
- It's my phone.
- Please tell me you're not a drug dealer.
237
00:14:27,272 --> 00:14:28,639
Would you care?
238
00:14:28,641 --> 00:14:29,410
Maybe.
239
00:14:31,010 --> 00:14:31,912
I'm just not in to technology.
240
00:14:33,780 --> 00:14:35,645
So if I googled your name I wouldn't
find your Instagram account?
241
00:14:35,647 --> 00:14:36,346
No.
242
00:14:36,348 --> 00:14:37,347
But you still text?
243
00:14:37,349 --> 00:14:38,718
I still text.
244
00:14:42,222 --> 00:14:44,091
This is my number.
245
00:14:47,727 --> 00:14:48,661
See you tomorrow.
246
00:15:26,732 --> 00:15:28,298
Hey!
247
00:15:28,300 --> 00:15:31,472
Hey, Eric! It's um, it... Mandy.
248
00:15:33,205 --> 00:15:35,239
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
249
00:15:35,241 --> 00:15:36,773
From that bar on the
Lower East Side.
250
00:15:36,775 --> 00:15:38,509
So, what's up man?
251
00:15:38,511 --> 00:15:39,512
What are you doing tonight?
252
00:15:44,717 --> 00:15:46,687
Hey Sean, it's um,
it's... Kayleigh.
253
00:15:48,253 --> 00:15:49,155
Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
254
00:15:50,689 --> 00:15:53,990
So listen, what's up?
What are you doing tonight?
255
00:15:53,992 --> 00:15:54,694
You have plans?
256
00:16:01,099 --> 00:16:03,267
Hi, you've reached
Tom, leave a message,
257
00:16:03,269 --> 00:16:04,605
and I'll get right
back to you.
258
00:16:49,181 --> 00:16:50,716
Hey, Frank.
259
00:16:52,218 --> 00:16:53,386
What's up man? I'm
really sorry...
260
00:16:54,020 --> 00:16:55,155
I know it's late.
261
00:16:56,455 --> 00:16:58,191
We're full.
Most people got here hours ago.
262
00:17:00,827 --> 00:17:01,695
Come on, man.
263
00:17:11,570 --> 00:17:13,304
This is for me when I'm here.
264
00:17:13,306 --> 00:17:14,872
You want to stay,
you gotta share.
265
00:17:14,874 --> 00:17:15,576
You got a problem with that?
266
00:17:20,245 --> 00:17:21,113
Take off your shirt.
267
00:17:26,985 --> 00:17:28,120
And the bra.
268
00:19:22,367 --> 00:19:23,470
What's your name?
269
00:19:24,971 --> 00:19:25,739
Chrissie.
270
00:19:31,711 --> 00:19:32,878
Yes, yes.
Go start breakfast, fine.
271
00:19:33,578 --> 00:19:34,714
Yes, I'll be up in a little bit.
272
00:19:36,782 --> 00:19:37,783
Alright, I'll be there.
273
00:19:42,754 --> 00:19:43,887
You awake?
274
00:19:43,889 --> 00:19:44,724
Yeah.
275
00:19:56,769 --> 00:19:58,635
Here, for your head.
276
00:19:58,637 --> 00:19:59,405
Thanks.
277
00:20:12,084 --> 00:20:13,286
Last night was great.
278
00:20:15,053 --> 00:20:18,492
Yeah, Frank, thank
you for the bed.
279
00:20:21,726 --> 00:20:25,028
You know, I know the first gig I
got you only pays minimum wage,
280
00:20:25,030 --> 00:20:27,498
but if you'd like to make
a couple extra bucks
281
00:20:27,500 --> 00:20:29,834
I can get you a job
a few days a week.
282
00:20:29,836 --> 00:20:30,636
It pays better.
283
00:20:31,671 --> 00:20:32,606
Yeah?
284
00:20:34,540 --> 00:20:37,476
Yeah, that could
be great actually.
285
00:20:39,110 --> 00:20:40,579
Maybe I'll save enough
to get an apartment this month.
286
00:20:58,998 --> 00:21:00,530
What happened to you?
287
00:21:00,532 --> 00:21:02,232
Fuck.
288
00:21:02,234 --> 00:21:04,201
Oh, you didn't.
289
00:21:04,203 --> 00:21:06,470
Where were you?
290
00:21:06,472 --> 00:21:09,742
James made me keep my phone in
this cellphone dead box thingy.
291
00:21:11,511 --> 00:21:15,514
Yeah, well why do you let
that freak control you?
292
00:21:16,581 --> 00:21:18,315
You don't know what it's like
to be a shelter baby.
293
00:21:18,317 --> 00:21:19,618
James had my back.
294
00:21:28,293 --> 00:21:31,230
This one time, some asshole stole
the only pair of shoes I had,
295
00:21:31,931 --> 00:21:33,864
and James found him
and beat the shit out of him.
296
00:21:33,866 --> 00:21:35,532
I thought he was going
to choke him to death
297
00:21:35,534 --> 00:21:36,569
with his necklace he wears.
298
00:21:38,671 --> 00:21:41,538
And then he taught me how to put
my shoes in the spokes of my bed
299
00:21:41,540 --> 00:21:44,008
so that no one would ever
take them from me again.
300
00:21:44,010 --> 00:21:46,777
I know he gave you those bruises
you think you're hiding so well.
301
00:21:46,779 --> 00:21:48,778
You don't know
anything about it!
302
00:21:48,780 --> 00:21:50,314
It's better than fucking
Frank for a roof.
303
00:21:50,316 --> 00:21:52,182
I didn't fuck him.
304
00:21:52,184 --> 00:21:54,620
Whatever, you let him use you.
305
00:21:55,021 --> 00:21:57,086
He's getting me an extra job.
306
00:21:57,088 --> 00:21:58,188
I used him.
307
00:21:58,190 --> 00:21:59,292
Sure.
308
00:22:03,328 --> 00:22:04,998
Well, I have a date tonight.
309
00:22:05,731 --> 00:22:06,900
What?
310
00:22:07,832 --> 00:22:09,401
Yeah, I met a really
nice guy at the park.
311
00:22:11,236 --> 00:22:14,538
You met him yesterday and you left
him to come here and fuck Frank?
312
00:22:14,540 --> 00:22:18,244
No, you asshole, he wants
to take me out on a real date.
313
00:22:19,611 --> 00:22:21,614
Like flowers, and
candles, and shit?
314
00:22:22,581 --> 00:22:23,449
Yeah.
315
00:22:24,916 --> 00:22:28,154
He thought I was a regular girl
just like chillin' at the park.
316
00:22:28,386 --> 00:22:29,987
He bought me tacos.
317
00:22:29,989 --> 00:22:31,491
Oh, must be love!
318
00:22:36,361 --> 00:22:37,429
Well, you can't show up tonight
looking like that.
319
00:22:39,298 --> 00:22:40,967
You look like you slept in
sweaty old ball jizz.
320
00:22:45,972 --> 00:22:47,473
Baby, you
okay out there?
321
00:22:47,873 --> 00:22:49,209
Yeah mom, it's okay.
322
00:22:49,442 --> 00:22:51,374
Pssst.
323
00:23:01,354 --> 00:23:02,622
Hey man, comedy show.
324
00:23:05,323 --> 00:23:06,458
Come on, don't be a dick.
325
00:23:08,094 --> 00:23:09,759
Hey, there's a
comedy show tonight.
326
00:23:09,761 --> 00:23:11,127
You guys want to come?
327
00:23:11,129 --> 00:23:12,930
Uh sure. Thank you.
328
00:23:12,932 --> 00:23:13,633
Hilarity Hall, don't miss it.
329
00:23:14,567 --> 00:23:15,798
Comedy show?
330
00:23:15,800 --> 00:23:16,636
Comedy show!
331
00:23:23,175 --> 00:23:24,176
Oh.
332
00:23:25,277 --> 00:23:26,876
Hey Mickey.
333
00:23:26,878 --> 00:23:28,112
Oh, hey, hey, hey how'd it go?
334
00:23:28,114 --> 00:23:29,546
It was great.
335
00:23:29,548 --> 00:23:31,214
Hey, excellent.
336
00:23:31,216 --> 00:23:32,251
Yeah? Yeah, I'd love
to do it again.
337
00:23:33,085 --> 00:23:35,285
Alright and this is for you.
338
00:23:35,287 --> 00:23:37,086
- Yes, thank you.
- All right.
339
00:23:37,088 --> 00:23:39,757
Hey listen, do you think that I
could give you my direct number
340
00:23:39,759 --> 00:23:41,692
so we don't have to
go through Frank?
341
00:23:41,694 --> 00:23:43,626
Ah, I can't really
do that Chrissie.
342
00:23:43,628 --> 00:23:45,162
You know, Frank is in charge
of the program.
343
00:23:45,164 --> 00:23:46,462
Yeah, yeah, sure.
344
00:23:46,464 --> 00:23:47,765
But hey you did great.
345
00:23:47,767 --> 00:23:49,700
- We'd be happy to have you back.
- Ok.
346
00:23:49,702 --> 00:23:50,800
You know, talk to Frank.
347
00:23:50,802 --> 00:23:51,969
I will. Thanks.
348
00:23:51,971 --> 00:23:52,705
Alright babe.
349
00:24:30,776 --> 00:24:31,778
Who?
350
00:24:32,078 --> 00:24:33,646
James, he wants me to come over.
351
00:24:34,245 --> 00:24:36,346
Listen, if you're worried
about a place to crash
352
00:24:36,348 --> 00:24:37,580
fuck it, I'm not going
to go on the date.
353
00:24:37,582 --> 00:24:38,350
No! Go!
354
00:24:40,051 --> 00:24:41,852
I don't care, I mean, we both
know the two of us together
355
00:24:41,854 --> 00:24:43,519
it's better and it's safer.
356
00:24:43,521 --> 00:24:45,090
I'm good. Go pretend
like you have a real life.
357
00:24:48,860 --> 00:24:50,195
How do I look?
358
00:24:50,361 --> 00:24:52,031
Like a real girl.
359
00:25:04,976 --> 00:25:07,713
Voila!
The spice has been added.
360
00:25:09,581 --> 00:25:11,083
And the food is almost
ready for the lady.
361
00:25:13,452 --> 00:25:15,188
I can't believe you're
cooking for me.
362
00:25:16,521 --> 00:25:18,454
Well it's kind
of my other move.
363
00:25:18,456 --> 00:25:20,324
Well, you can't just go
telling me all your moves.
364
00:25:20,326 --> 00:25:21,724
It worked though, didn't it?
365
00:25:21,726 --> 00:25:22,728
It wasn't bad.
366
00:25:22,927 --> 00:25:25,162
So...
367
00:25:25,164 --> 00:25:29,199
I know that someday you're going
to be this big famous actress
368
00:25:29,201 --> 00:25:31,367
and totally forget
that you ever met me,
369
00:25:31,369 --> 00:25:34,707
but in the meantime,
what do you do to pay your rent?
370
00:25:35,573 --> 00:25:37,406
Well, I kind of do
a lot of things.
371
00:25:37,408 --> 00:25:39,143
Oh yeah, like freelancing?
372
00:25:39,145 --> 00:25:41,411
Yeah, yeah.
373
00:25:41,413 --> 00:25:42,779
A little of this,
a little of that.
374
00:25:42,781 --> 00:25:44,882
What kind of stuff?
375
00:25:44,884 --> 00:25:47,351
Well, I have a part
time job at a bakery,
376
00:25:47,353 --> 00:25:49,720
and today I worked
at a comedy club.
377
00:25:49,722 --> 00:25:50,586
I love comedy.
378
00:25:50,588 --> 00:25:51,191
Yeah?
379
00:25:52,390 --> 00:25:53,425
So, tell me a joke.
380
00:25:56,294 --> 00:25:57,594
I didn't say that
I was a comedian.
381
00:25:57,596 --> 00:25:58,530
Whatever, tell me one anyway.
382
00:26:01,867 --> 00:26:04,101
Oh, okay!
383
00:26:04,103 --> 00:26:08,137
A Priest, a Rabbi, a Nun, an
Irishman, a blonde, and a black guy
384
00:26:08,139 --> 00:26:10,007
all walk into a bar,
385
00:26:10,009 --> 00:26:12,041
and the bartender says,
386
00:26:12,043 --> 00:26:13,045
"What is this? Some
kind of joke?"
387
00:26:15,181 --> 00:26:16,145
That was it?
388
00:26:16,147 --> 00:26:17,151
That was it.
389
00:26:19,385 --> 00:26:21,250
That was terrible.
390
00:26:21,252 --> 00:26:22,318
Yeah, I
know, I told you.
391
00:26:22,320 --> 00:26:24,453
I mean you did... but...
392
00:26:24,455 --> 00:26:26,088
Well you're the one who works
at the comedy club
393
00:26:26,090 --> 00:26:26,990
so you tell me a joke.
394
00:26:26,992 --> 00:26:28,094
Okay.
395
00:26:31,696 --> 00:26:32,799
Alright, so Little
Red Riding Hood
396
00:26:34,800 --> 00:26:38,171
is on the way to bring her granny
a big basket full of sweets.
397
00:26:39,338 --> 00:26:41,270
She's skipping through the woods
398
00:26:41,272 --> 00:26:43,105
and on the path, she
gets very distracted
399
00:26:43,107 --> 00:26:45,275
by some very beautiful flowers.
400
00:26:45,277 --> 00:26:47,743
So she's picking
them and of course,
401
00:26:47,745 --> 00:26:49,915
up behind her jumps the Big
Bad Wolf, and he goes,
402
00:26:50,281 --> 00:26:52,751
"Little Red, I'm going
to steal all your sweets."
403
00:26:54,819 --> 00:26:58,321
And she very coyly lifts up
her skirt, and she goes,
404
00:26:58,323 --> 00:27:00,857
"No, you're not Mr. Wolf.
405
00:27:00,859 --> 00:27:05,095
You're going to eat me.
Just like the story says."
406
00:27:05,097 --> 00:27:07,029
Oh, my God!
407
00:27:07,031 --> 00:27:08,400
Wow!
408
00:27:10,735 --> 00:27:13,569
I hope you know you just ruined
every little girl's childhood.
409
00:27:13,571 --> 00:27:15,105
Yeah, well life kind
of does that anyways,
410
00:27:15,107 --> 00:27:16,108
so I don't feel bad.
411
00:27:22,647 --> 00:27:23,946
James?
412
00:27:26,284 --> 00:27:27,917
Do we have to do
this every time?
413
00:27:27,919 --> 00:27:28,587
Shut up.
414
00:27:41,133 --> 00:27:41,768
Jesus.
415
00:27:42,734 --> 00:27:43,901
No one's here.
416
00:27:43,903 --> 00:27:45,167
The government isn't here.
417
00:27:45,169 --> 00:27:46,769
No one gives a fuck about you.
418
00:27:46,771 --> 00:27:48,238
Oh no one gives a
fuck about me now?
419
00:27:48,240 --> 00:27:49,742
Besides me. You know I do.
420
00:27:49,908 --> 00:27:51,076
Stop it.
421
00:27:52,176 --> 00:27:53,780
Take your shoes off.
Take your shoes off.
422
00:27:56,181 --> 00:27:57,817
Don't forget your phone.
423
00:27:59,151 --> 00:28:00,851
I thought maybe I
could keep it out.
424
00:28:00,853 --> 00:28:02,786
- Chrissie is on a date with this guy...
- What?
425
00:28:02,788 --> 00:28:04,320
She said she would text me.
426
00:28:04,322 --> 00:28:05,321
I don't even wanna
hear that girl's name.
427
00:28:05,323 --> 00:28:06,690
Why are you hanging
out with that girl?
428
00:28:06,692 --> 00:28:08,357
Because she's my friend.
429
00:28:08,359 --> 00:28:10,259
No, she's not your friend.
She's a fucking tourist.
430
00:28:10,261 --> 00:28:12,395
Cece, she's using you.
431
00:28:12,397 --> 00:28:15,132
Oh my God! No she's not!
She needs me, she's clueless.
432
00:28:15,134 --> 00:28:16,400
No! That's fucking bullshit.
433
00:28:16,402 --> 00:28:17,770
Put the phone in the box or go.
434
00:28:19,405 --> 00:28:21,203
Put your phone in there.
435
00:28:21,205 --> 00:28:22,538
- What's so hard to understand?!
- Okay, okay.
436
00:28:22,540 --> 00:28:23,675
Fine, fine. Forget it.
437
00:28:26,712 --> 00:28:28,681
What's going on
with the windows?
438
00:28:30,081 --> 00:28:31,450
So...
439
00:28:32,684 --> 00:28:34,354
where was childhood
ruined for you?
440
00:28:34,986 --> 00:28:38,221
Um, middle of nowhere. Ohio.
441
00:28:38,223 --> 00:28:40,356
Boring. You?
442
00:28:40,358 --> 00:28:42,427
Long Island. Also boring.
443
00:28:44,762 --> 00:28:47,830
Son of Dr. and Mrs. Rosenberg.
Last in my Hebrew class,
444
00:28:47,832 --> 00:28:50,299
much to their disappointment.
445
00:28:50,301 --> 00:28:52,435
Oh you couldn't beat me in the
disappointing your parents' department.
446
00:28:52,437 --> 00:28:54,971
Ah, sounds intriguing.
447
00:28:54,973 --> 00:28:59,712
I guess if you are interested in
converting the world to evangelicalism.
448
00:29:00,745 --> 00:29:02,078
Praise Jesus!
449
00:29:02,080 --> 00:29:03,880
- Seriously?
- Yeah.
450
00:29:03,882 --> 00:29:05,414
They moved to Africa actually
451
00:29:05,416 --> 00:29:06,916
to save the unconverted.
452
00:29:06,918 --> 00:29:08,921
Whoa, you're kidding?
453
00:29:10,055 --> 00:29:13,923
Nuh-huh. So sorry if I don't
introduce you to mom anytime soon.
454
00:29:13,925 --> 00:29:16,058
Ah, parents love me.
455
00:29:16,060 --> 00:29:17,693
Well, 'cause you're charming.
456
00:29:17,695 --> 00:29:18,964
But mine aren't.
457
00:29:20,765 --> 00:29:23,666
Um...
458
00:29:23,668 --> 00:29:26,538
but hey, why don't you tell me
more about the branding world?
459
00:29:28,339 --> 00:29:29,675
It's pretty great actually.
460
00:29:29,875 --> 00:29:32,041
I'm working on this new spot
461
00:29:32,043 --> 00:29:34,778
for this local whiskey called
"Moon Drill" that's made Upstate;
462
00:29:34,780 --> 00:29:36,449
I'm heading up there pretty soon
to present the idea
463
00:29:37,182 --> 00:29:39,016
and get a green light.
464
00:29:39,018 --> 00:29:40,817
That's awesome.
465
00:29:40,819 --> 00:29:42,088
Yeah, yeah I mean
it's really great
466
00:29:43,321 --> 00:29:44,991
going into work and
loving what you do.
467
00:29:45,190 --> 00:29:46,091
I feel really lucky.
468
00:29:47,559 --> 00:29:49,061
I'd settle for making money,
fuck happiness.
469
00:29:50,396 --> 00:29:52,496
You mean, there isn't anything
you want to do
470
00:29:52,498 --> 00:29:54,500
that could make you money
and also make you happy?
471
00:29:55,733 --> 00:29:57,901
Doesn't mean I don't believe in
being happy.
472
00:29:57,903 --> 00:29:59,105
I'm happy now.
473
00:30:06,310 --> 00:30:07,347
Did you bring it?
474
00:30:08,746 --> 00:30:11,013
I thought maybe we could
475
00:30:11,015 --> 00:30:13,185
just have a quiet
night, you know?
476
00:30:13,484 --> 00:30:15,120
Stop it. Can I have my stuff?
477
00:30:16,155 --> 00:30:17,887
Just hold off for a bit.
478
00:30:17,889 --> 00:30:19,825
It's in the bag, just
hold off, come on.
479
00:30:21,393 --> 00:30:22,562
Are you fucking retarded?!
480
00:30:23,861 --> 00:30:25,030
You can't hear anything? What?
481
00:30:25,864 --> 00:30:27,700
No! What?
482
00:30:33,271 --> 00:30:34,374
What happened to your face?
483
00:30:36,774 --> 00:30:38,410
I put on some makeup.
484
00:30:38,743 --> 00:30:40,245
That's what that is?
485
00:30:49,288 --> 00:30:50,455
What's wrong?
486
00:31:05,838 --> 00:31:07,804
Okay.
487
00:31:07,806 --> 00:31:10,906
Come on get up. Come on,
let's go paint. Let's paint.
488
00:31:10,908 --> 00:31:11,977
We're going to paint!
489
00:31:13,278 --> 00:31:14,614
Get in there! I need
you to painting.
490
00:31:15,313 --> 00:31:16,181
Okay, come on go.
491
00:31:16,982 --> 00:31:18,350
Get up. Thank you.
492
00:31:20,051 --> 00:31:22,885
Okay, you just take some of this
493
00:31:22,887 --> 00:31:23,752
and get right there
and you paint the window...
494
00:31:23,754 --> 00:31:25,154
the glass! the glass!
495
00:31:25,156 --> 00:31:26,522
Yeah, good, good.
496
00:31:26,524 --> 00:31:27,325
Move over.
497
00:31:32,697 --> 00:31:33,498
One more.
498
00:31:35,099 --> 00:31:36,468
Get in there. Get in there.
499
00:31:37,235 --> 00:31:38,503
Yeah lick it, lick it.
500
00:31:40,806 --> 00:31:44,340
This place is amazing. I would
kill for something like this.
501
00:31:44,342 --> 00:31:46,244
Yeah? I'm thinking about moving
out, getting a one bedroom.
502
00:31:47,613 --> 00:31:49,011
I mean I love Avi,
503
00:31:49,013 --> 00:31:51,250
but just never
have my own space.
504
00:31:52,050 --> 00:31:54,217
This is huge though.
505
00:31:54,219 --> 00:31:56,489
Yeah, but never lived on my own,
506
00:31:57,955 --> 00:31:59,958
Can't beat the privacy,
507
00:32:00,425 --> 00:32:02,427
just me... a pretty girl...
508
00:32:09,934 --> 00:32:12,201
Hey, do you play, the keyboard?
509
00:32:12,203 --> 00:32:14,671
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
510
00:32:14,673 --> 00:32:16,108
I dabble, mainly just write
jingles for my commercials.
511
00:32:16,942 --> 00:32:18,240
I used to play.
512
00:32:18,242 --> 00:32:19,175
- Yeah?
- Mhm.
513
00:32:19,177 --> 00:32:20,512
Play something.
514
00:32:21,113 --> 00:32:24,381
No, my mom always was like,
515
00:32:24,383 --> 00:32:26,719
"You got no talent for that
devil music, girl."
516
00:32:28,453 --> 00:32:30,455
You're like really honest
for a first date.
517
00:32:30,621 --> 00:32:31,922
Is that bad?
518
00:32:31,924 --> 00:32:34,327
No! I mean, it's refreshing.
519
00:32:35,194 --> 00:32:37,696
Weird but refreshing.
520
00:32:39,263 --> 00:32:41,530
You should play something,
get back on the horse.
521
00:32:41,532 --> 00:32:43,666
I think the horse
is dead by now.
522
00:32:43,668 --> 00:32:45,203
Play for me. Your
audience awaits.
523
00:32:47,940 --> 00:32:50,874
Okay, but I only remember
how to play one thing
524
00:32:50,876 --> 00:32:52,078
and you're going to laugh.
525
00:33:13,698 --> 00:33:14,964
So you're a Disney girl?
526
00:33:14,966 --> 00:33:16,134
Yeah.
527
00:33:26,377 --> 00:33:28,380
Oh, you liked that?
528
00:33:29,047 --> 00:33:30,550
Yeah, I liked that.
529
00:34:29,374 --> 00:34:30,375
Hey...
530
00:34:31,676 --> 00:34:33,178
I'm ordering Chinese food,
do you want something?
531
00:34:34,046 --> 00:34:35,381
Um, fried rice.
532
00:34:36,113 --> 00:34:37,913
Chicken or vegetable?
533
00:34:37,915 --> 00:34:39,218
Vegetable.
534
00:36:27,926 --> 00:36:28,928
What?
535
00:36:30,060 --> 00:36:31,062
Nothing.
536
00:36:34,665 --> 00:36:36,299
There's just something about
watching you
537
00:36:36,301 --> 00:36:37,566
do the same thing every night,
538
00:36:37,568 --> 00:36:38,069
it...
539
00:36:39,136 --> 00:36:41,140
it makes the chaos go away.
540
00:36:44,075 --> 00:36:47,977
So my glasses make
everything balanced?
541
00:36:47,979 --> 00:36:49,682
Mhm, you have very
smart glasses.
542
00:36:53,785 --> 00:36:54,520
Let's watch Game of Thrones.
543
00:36:55,287 --> 00:36:56,455
I haven't seen it.
544
00:36:57,589 --> 00:36:58,520
Are you kidding me?!
545
00:36:58,522 --> 00:36:59,354
No.
546
00:36:59,356 --> 00:37:00,390
Are you kidding me?
547
00:37:00,392 --> 00:37:02,091
No, I've never seen it.
548
00:37:02,093 --> 00:37:03,428
Okay, alright, we are
watching the pilot
549
00:37:04,662 --> 00:37:05,530
right now.
550
00:37:06,997 --> 00:37:08,131
Prepare to have your
mind blown, okay?
551
00:37:08,133 --> 00:37:09,765
I'm prepared.
552
00:37:09,767 --> 00:37:11,002
Blow my mind.
553
00:37:31,222 --> 00:37:32,223
What do you need?
554
00:37:33,859 --> 00:37:35,661
Oh, I was just looking for a
Ziploc. For the sandwich...
555
00:37:38,363 --> 00:37:40,065
It's like nine in the morning.
556
00:37:40,631 --> 00:37:42,033
Yeah for later.
557
00:37:44,301 --> 00:37:46,935
Oh don't you have like...
558
00:37:46,937 --> 00:37:48,039
a lunch break or whatever?
559
00:37:49,540 --> 00:37:51,374
Look man, I didn't mean
to steal your food or anything,
560
00:37:51,376 --> 00:37:53,575
I just saw some
stuff in the fridge
561
00:37:53,577 --> 00:37:54,546
and I thought, you
know, Monday's suck.
562
00:37:56,948 --> 00:37:57,683
Yeah.
563
00:38:00,118 --> 00:38:01,187
Here.
564
00:38:02,086 --> 00:38:03,121
Thanks.
565
00:38:05,723 --> 00:38:06,855
Hey.
566
00:38:06,857 --> 00:38:07,493
Hey.
567
00:38:09,627 --> 00:38:11,727
I'm going to get
out of here, okay.
568
00:38:11,729 --> 00:38:14,363
Wait for me, I'll get dressed,
and I'll come with you.
569
00:38:14,365 --> 00:38:15,798
No, I want to get
out of the way,
570
00:38:15,800 --> 00:38:17,267
but see you tonight?
571
00:38:17,269 --> 00:38:18,935
Can we make it tomorrow
night actually?
572
00:38:18,937 --> 00:38:19,505
I'm working late tonight.
573
00:38:20,671 --> 00:38:21,206
What?
574
00:38:22,339 --> 00:38:23,475
Nothing, see you tomorrow.
575
00:38:31,182 --> 00:38:32,848
Ah, David,
see you tomorrow.
576
00:38:32,850 --> 00:38:35,584
Tomorrow, ah.
577
00:38:35,586 --> 00:38:36,588
Shut up.
578
00:38:39,990 --> 00:38:42,658
Question, did you ever make a
sandwich after spending the night
579
00:38:42,660 --> 00:38:45,995
at a girl's place to take
with you for later?
580
00:38:45,997 --> 00:38:48,730
I don't know, but I clogged a
girl's toilet once accidentally.
581
00:38:48,732 --> 00:38:49,799
I didn't tell her.
582
00:38:49,801 --> 00:38:50,767
That is so sweet.
583
00:38:50,769 --> 00:38:52,634
Yeah.
584
00:38:52,636 --> 00:38:55,904
Dude, she's not like
a one night stand.
585
00:38:55,906 --> 00:38:59,341
Yeah, I know, I mean
she's been here for days.
586
00:38:59,343 --> 00:39:02,779
I'm just saying maybe you could
eat her roommates' food,
587
00:39:02,781 --> 00:39:05,784
or annoy someone else
with the loud sex.
588
00:39:06,785 --> 00:39:08,517
She's seems kind of wild.
589
00:39:08,519 --> 00:39:12,020
She's not your typical blonde
uptight type, you know?
590
00:39:12,022 --> 00:39:15,026
Yeah, but I got
burned with Jessica.
591
00:39:17,595 --> 00:39:19,764
Maybe she's just the
kind of girl I need.
592
00:39:21,665 --> 00:39:23,035
All right, all right,
cheers to that.
593
00:39:23,767 --> 00:39:24,633
I support you.
594
00:39:24,635 --> 00:39:25,637
Thank you.
595
00:39:38,883 --> 00:39:40,118
You don't look good.
596
00:39:41,051 --> 00:39:44,587
Fuck! Yes! Tampons.
597
00:39:44,589 --> 00:39:47,390
Maybe this month I don't have to shove
Starbucks napkins up my snatch.
598
00:39:47,392 --> 00:39:49,094
What the fuck! I don't shoot!
599
00:39:49,627 --> 00:39:50,229
Okay.
600
00:39:51,696 --> 00:39:53,495
What you so bougie now
that you got a boyfriend
601
00:39:53,497 --> 00:39:55,365
you going to get all judge-y?
602
00:39:55,367 --> 00:39:57,133
No, I just didn't hear
from you for a few days,
603
00:39:57,135 --> 00:39:58,636
and I was worried.
604
00:39:59,504 --> 00:40:02,138
Tricking someone
into falling in love with you
605
00:40:02,140 --> 00:40:04,143
doesn't make you better
than anyone else here.
606
00:40:05,843 --> 00:40:08,276
Did you tell him you're a little homeless
girl, fucking him for a warm bed?
607
00:40:08,278 --> 00:40:09,948
It's not like that!
608
00:40:10,347 --> 00:40:12,247
No, that's how it's been before.
609
00:40:12,249 --> 00:40:13,551
Yeah, well this is different.
610
00:40:14,653 --> 00:40:15,721
Cece, look what I got.
611
00:40:17,354 --> 00:40:19,388
Those are
some dope kicks .
612
00:40:19,390 --> 00:40:21,624
Mom got them from
the Salvation Army.
613
00:40:21,626 --> 00:40:23,493
Did anyone teach you
how to take care of them?
614
00:40:23,495 --> 00:40:24,229
Nah, I'll just
wear them forever.
615
00:40:26,196 --> 00:40:29,064
I'm going to tell you what I was
lucky to have somebody tell me.
616
00:40:29,066 --> 00:40:31,334
If you are sleeping
in the city shelter,
617
00:40:31,336 --> 00:40:33,636
put the posts of your bed
inside the holes of your shoes,
618
00:40:33,638 --> 00:40:34,970
so no one yanks them
from you. Okay?
619
00:40:34,972 --> 00:40:36,571
Okay.
620
00:40:36,573 --> 00:40:38,441
Tell your
mom what I said.
621
00:40:38,443 --> 00:40:39,544
I'll beat anyone who tries
to mess with my shoes.
622
00:40:46,151 --> 00:40:47,950
You're like a tourist
in this world, Chrissie.
623
00:40:47,952 --> 00:40:50,289
You just don't get it.
624
00:40:51,388 --> 00:40:53,723
Yeah, well maybe I didn't grow
up in a shelter like you did,
625
00:40:53,725 --> 00:40:55,758
but I'm here right now
626
00:40:55,760 --> 00:40:59,227
so don't I deserve
just like one minute
627
00:40:59,229 --> 00:41:01,232
of pretending my
life doesn't suck?
628
00:41:01,332 --> 00:41:03,334
I mean, don't you deserve that?
629
00:41:07,839 --> 00:41:09,071
That's a cute bra.
630
00:41:09,073 --> 00:41:10,006
You want my bra too?
631
00:41:10,008 --> 00:41:11,573
Please?
632
00:41:11,575 --> 00:41:12,744
Ugh, fine.
633
00:41:18,249 --> 00:41:19,649
You've got the smallest
tits in the world.
634
00:41:19,651 --> 00:41:20,486
Fuck off.
635
00:41:21,385 --> 00:41:22,521
We can't all be like you.
636
00:41:24,421 --> 00:41:27,091
What else can I steal from you?
637
00:41:27,425 --> 00:41:28,924
What's this?
638
00:41:28,926 --> 00:41:29,892
It's David's.
639
00:41:31,062 --> 00:41:32,431
What?
640
00:41:33,263 --> 00:41:35,263
I was just being bitchy before,
641
00:41:35,265 --> 00:41:37,466
but you know you can't get
too attached, right?
642
00:41:37,468 --> 00:41:39,201
This guy is not your
happily ever after.
643
00:41:39,203 --> 00:41:41,256
How do you know?
644
00:41:42,073 --> 00:41:44,143
Guys like him will never stay
once he finds out who you are.
645
00:41:44,843 --> 00:41:46,611
Well who says he
has to find out?
646
00:41:48,213 --> 00:41:50,011
We are so close to getting
our apartment, Chrissie.
647
00:41:50,013 --> 00:41:51,848
Just focus on that.
648
00:41:51,850 --> 00:41:53,852
Don't let some dumb idea
of love distract you.
649
00:41:54,952 --> 00:41:57,220
Well, what if I
tell him the truth,
650
00:41:57,222 --> 00:41:59,354
and he finds out,
and it's just fine?
651
00:41:59,356 --> 00:42:01,557
People are people, Chrissie.
652
00:42:01,559 --> 00:42:03,294
They don't go around
in rose-colored glasses.
653
00:42:05,196 --> 00:42:06,828
If he passed you
begging on the street,
654
00:42:06,830 --> 00:42:08,631
he wouldn't look twice.
655
00:42:08,633 --> 00:42:10,466
Yeah, yeah I know.
656
00:42:10,468 --> 00:42:11,537
I just...
657
00:42:12,836 --> 00:42:15,173
I just really want it
to last a little longer.
658
00:42:23,046 --> 00:42:24,048
Hey Frank.
659
00:42:24,481 --> 00:42:26,415
Chrissie.
660
00:42:26,417 --> 00:42:28,017
I was hoping
you'd call your friend
661
00:42:28,019 --> 00:42:29,521
at the comedy club,
I want to work.
662
00:42:29,821 --> 00:42:30,653
Sure, no problem.
663
00:42:30,655 --> 00:42:33,256
Thanks.
664
00:42:33,258 --> 00:42:34,857
I'm really trying to turn it
around, you know,
665
00:42:34,859 --> 00:42:36,024
any dollar helps.
666
00:42:36,026 --> 00:42:37,459
Sure.
667
00:42:37,461 --> 00:42:38,794
Why don't you close the door.
668
00:42:38,796 --> 00:42:39,796
No problem, thanks.
669
00:42:39,798 --> 00:42:40,863
Chrissie?
670
00:42:40,865 --> 00:42:42,098
Yeah?
671
00:42:42,100 --> 00:42:43,469
I meant with you inside.
672
00:42:46,171 --> 00:42:48,640
Listen, do you think
we could skip it?
673
00:42:49,339 --> 00:42:51,406
I kind of met someone,
674
00:42:51,408 --> 00:42:53,276
and I don't know what it is yet
675
00:42:53,278 --> 00:42:55,578
like maybe it's nothing,
676
00:42:55,580 --> 00:42:58,781
but I'm kind of
hoping it's something
677
00:42:58,783 --> 00:43:01,082
and I just feel like this would
fuck it up, you know?
678
00:43:01,084 --> 00:43:02,588
Sure Chrissie,
whatever you want.
679
00:43:04,122 --> 00:43:06,125
Thanks Frank.
680
00:43:27,745 --> 00:43:29,281
That doesn't look like
Moon Drill Whiskey.
681
00:43:29,847 --> 00:43:31,413
Hey, Lysi.
682
00:43:31,415 --> 00:43:33,417
Who may I ask
is... Callie?
683
00:43:35,252 --> 00:43:37,588
Don't tell me you met someone?
684
00:43:39,890 --> 00:43:44,026
I don't know yet. Maybe.
685
00:43:44,028 --> 00:43:46,031
Too bad, I thought after
last weekend you'd call.
686
00:43:47,198 --> 00:43:49,832
I mean, I've been busy
687
00:43:49,834 --> 00:43:52,100
writing the copy for Moon Drill.
688
00:43:52,102 --> 00:43:55,303
Oh sure yeah, seems like
you've been really busy.
689
00:43:55,305 --> 00:43:56,071
Well hey,
writer's block is a bitch.
690
00:43:56,073 --> 00:43:58,307
Get it together.
691
00:43:58,309 --> 00:44:00,642
I'm really looking forward
to heading Upstate with you,
692
00:44:00,644 --> 00:44:03,247
getting drunk on whiskey,
dancing the night away.
693
00:44:03,647 --> 00:44:05,714
Booking a new client that'll
make us a fuck ton of money.
694
00:44:05,716 --> 00:44:07,649
Yeah, money
I could use.
695
00:44:07,651 --> 00:44:09,451
Speaking of which, you're
coming to my show,
696
00:44:09,453 --> 00:44:11,254
closing night
is tomorrow.
697
00:44:11,256 --> 00:44:13,122
Oh shit,
yes of course I'll be there.
698
00:44:13,124 --> 00:44:16,058
Good and bring your Callie.
699
00:44:16,060 --> 00:44:18,294
Yeah?
700
00:44:18,296 --> 00:44:19,528
I'll leave tickets
at the box office.
701
00:44:19,530 --> 00:44:20,464
Okay. Thank you.
702
00:44:31,075 --> 00:44:33,542
Free comedy show?
703
00:44:33,544 --> 00:44:35,211
It's awesome, come,
free comedy show.
704
00:44:35,213 --> 00:44:36,779
There you go.
705
00:44:36,781 --> 00:44:38,881
Free comedy show. Check it out.
706
00:44:38,883 --> 00:44:40,185
Check it out. Free comedy
show down the street!
707
00:44:42,452 --> 00:44:43,886
Hey, are you just
finishing up a shift?
708
00:44:43,888 --> 00:44:45,187
I can take over.
709
00:44:45,189 --> 00:44:46,955
No, I'm just working right now.
710
00:44:46,957 --> 00:44:48,658
Can you please go?
711
00:44:48,660 --> 00:44:50,426
Free comedy show!
712
00:44:50,428 --> 00:44:53,328
Hey listen, Frank actually
gave this job to me,
713
00:44:53,330 --> 00:44:55,564
and we talked about
it this morning.
714
00:44:55,566 --> 00:44:57,500
Oh shit, wait you're
Chrissie, right?
715
00:44:57,502 --> 00:44:58,203
Yeah.
716
00:44:59,269 --> 00:45:01,303
Oh girl, Frank told me to say
he's really sorry,
717
00:45:01,305 --> 00:45:02,872
but he gave the fucking job
to me, alright.
718
00:45:02,874 --> 00:45:04,140
Now get the fuck out of here.
719
00:45:04,142 --> 00:45:05,841
Are you fucking kidding me?
720
00:45:05,843 --> 00:45:08,109
- I am not fucking kidding you.
- Give me those fliers!
721
00:45:08,111 --> 00:45:09,477
- Bitch, it's my job!...
- It's my job!
722
00:45:09,479 --> 00:45:10,645
Hey! Hey! Hey!
723
00:45:10,647 --> 00:45:12,348
What's going on?
724
00:45:12,350 --> 00:45:12,915
You're supposed to
be bringing business
725
00:45:12,917 --> 00:45:14,850
not scaring people away.
726
00:45:14,852 --> 00:45:16,551
Hey, Mickey she just said
that she's taking this job,
727
00:45:16,553 --> 00:45:17,953
and that...
728
00:45:17,955 --> 00:45:18,988
Free comedy show.
729
00:45:18,990 --> 00:45:20,890
Frank told her to come today.
730
00:45:20,892 --> 00:45:22,892
Yeah, well Frank called and said
Laura was showing up today.
731
00:45:22,894 --> 00:45:24,229
Do you know why?
732
00:45:30,068 --> 00:45:32,336
Look, Frank told me you showed
up wasted at the shelter,
733
00:45:33,504 --> 00:45:35,674
and I shouldn't
trust you anymore.
734
00:45:36,207 --> 00:45:38,210
Are you serious? He said that?
735
00:45:38,843 --> 00:45:41,644
Listen, you did a great job
when you were here
736
00:45:41,646 --> 00:45:43,645
so why don't you
just talk to Frank.
737
00:45:43,647 --> 00:45:45,714
- Yeah.
- Figure it out.
738
00:45:45,716 --> 00:45:47,184
Yeah, I'll talk to
Frank, I'll figure it out, thanks.
739
00:45:49,586 --> 00:45:50,953
Fuck!
740
00:45:50,955 --> 00:45:52,721
Yeah, you should've.
741
00:45:52,723 --> 00:45:53,425
There you go, thanks.
742
00:48:47,899 --> 00:48:50,268
How are you?
743
00:48:51,035 --> 00:48:52,404
Shit.
744
00:48:54,571 --> 00:48:55,539
I'm sorry. I think I left
my wallet at home.
745
00:49:03,847 --> 00:49:05,747
I'm sorry.
746
00:49:05,749 --> 00:49:07,716
It's okay sweetie, I got it.
747
00:49:07,718 --> 00:49:10,222
I feel terrible, I'm so sorry.
Thanks ma'am.
748
00:49:39,482 --> 00:49:42,153
Wow, I just have to say
this place is so great.
749
00:49:44,589 --> 00:49:46,591
Oh my God, it's just like...
look at the neighborhood.
750
00:49:47,691 --> 00:49:49,493
Spare,
spare some change.
751
00:49:53,129 --> 00:49:54,830
And we are on
a high floor
752
00:49:54,832 --> 00:49:56,865
so as you can see
we get tons of natural light.
753
00:49:56,867 --> 00:49:58,834
It's gorgeous in the mornings
754
00:49:58,836 --> 00:50:01,437
and this area is
actually great for kids.
755
00:50:01,439 --> 00:50:04,205
There's a park just
down the street
756
00:50:04,207 --> 00:50:06,508
and the schools in this
neighborhood are some of the best.
757
00:50:06,510 --> 00:50:08,576
So if you're thinking
of starting a family
758
00:50:08,578 --> 00:50:10,578
it could be a really great
apartment for you guys.
759
00:50:10,580 --> 00:50:12,848
And there's lots of amenities
in the building.
760
00:50:12,850 --> 00:50:14,950
There's actually a washer and
dryer just down a floor,
761
00:50:14,952 --> 00:50:17,785
so that's very convenient
762
00:50:17,787 --> 00:50:19,790
but this place will probably be
gone by the end of the day, so...
763
00:50:20,725 --> 00:50:21,726
We're very interested.
764
00:50:22,859 --> 00:50:25,961
Great! All you need to move in
is three month's rent.
765
00:50:25,963 --> 00:50:29,631
That's $10,200.00. And tax returns
from the last three years
766
00:50:29,633 --> 00:50:31,667
showing that you make 80 times
the monthly rent.
767
00:50:31,669 --> 00:50:32,901
And if you are interested
768
00:50:32,903 --> 00:50:34,636
do be sure to apply quickly.
769
00:50:34,638 --> 00:50:35,937
We hope to hear from you.
770
00:50:35,939 --> 00:50:37,406
Thank you.
771
00:50:37,408 --> 00:50:39,207
- Have a great day.
- Thank you.
772
00:50:39,209 --> 00:50:40,711
Hello, how are you?
773
00:50:41,544 --> 00:50:43,946
Would you mind just signing in
on this sheet for me here?
774
00:50:43,948 --> 00:50:46,214
- Sure.
- That'd be great, thank you.
775
00:50:46,216 --> 00:50:48,850
As you can see this is a
beautifully renovated apartment.
776
00:50:48,852 --> 00:50:51,153
All new stainless
steel appliances,
777
00:50:51,155 --> 00:50:53,855
great hardwood floors,
the neighborhood is awesome,
778
00:50:53,857 --> 00:50:56,591
lots of bars and restaurants.
779
00:50:56,593 --> 00:50:59,227
This is for you. If you are
interested do let us know quickly,
780
00:50:59,229 --> 00:51:00,595
'cause this place is going
to fly off the market.
781
00:51:00,597 --> 00:51:01,497
Thanks.
782
00:51:01,499 --> 00:51:03,146
You're welcome.
783
00:51:32,796 --> 00:51:33,631
Hera!
784
00:51:34,432 --> 00:51:37,433
Goddess of Women
785
00:51:37,435 --> 00:51:38,570
We did it!
786
00:51:42,272 --> 00:51:44,908
I couldn't have done
it without you.
787
00:51:47,877 --> 00:51:50,048
I was wondering? Hoping!
788
00:51:52,682 --> 00:51:54,251
That if the peace
treaty was signed
789
00:51:56,419 --> 00:51:59,423
you would let me see him again.
790
00:52:18,676 --> 00:52:21,846
Peace won't last
791
00:52:22,613 --> 00:52:23,647
will it?
792
00:52:26,316 --> 00:52:28,652
I will see you again,
sweet Goddess.
793
00:53:06,256 --> 00:53:07,355
There she is.
794
00:53:07,357 --> 00:53:07,959
Oh.
795
00:53:08,792 --> 00:53:10,024
Hey, you were incredible.
796
00:53:10,026 --> 00:53:11,859
Oh thank you.
797
00:53:11,861 --> 00:53:13,060
- David.
- Fen.
798
00:53:13,062 --> 00:53:15,096
Nice to meet you, Fen.
799
00:53:15,098 --> 00:53:16,832
It only took you until
closing night to get here.
800
00:53:16,834 --> 00:53:18,667
Well I had to find a date.
801
00:53:18,669 --> 00:53:19,937
Callie, this is Lysi,
my partner at the firm.
802
00:53:21,104 --> 00:53:23,538
I'm boring by day,
but fabulous by night.
803
00:53:23,540 --> 00:53:24,109
You were amazing.
804
00:53:25,042 --> 00:53:28,046
I mean, like out of control.
805
00:53:28,146 --> 00:53:31,345
Seriously just congratulations.
806
00:53:31,347 --> 00:53:33,350
I would love to pick your brain
about acting...
807
00:53:33,450 --> 00:53:34,950
Thank you.
808
00:53:34,952 --> 00:53:36,955
She's charming.
809
00:53:37,488 --> 00:53:38,623
So tell me, really, what did
you think about the show?
810
00:53:40,024 --> 00:53:43,158
Well, I mean leave it to you to
create a geopolitical think-piece
811
00:53:43,160 --> 00:53:46,962
complete with full frontal
nudity and dick jokes.
812
00:53:46,964 --> 00:53:49,730
David, darling the dick jokes are
just to get the people in the house.
813
00:53:49,732 --> 00:53:50,935
I thought it was the boobs.
814
00:53:54,271 --> 00:53:56,037
I meant what did you
think about the piece
815
00:53:56,039 --> 00:53:57,906
as it relates to
the world today?
816
00:53:57,908 --> 00:54:00,975
Israel, Palestine.
Russian, Ukraine.
817
00:54:00,977 --> 00:54:03,645
America, and the entire fucking
Middle East.
818
00:54:03,647 --> 00:54:05,714
You definitely
got your point across.
819
00:54:05,716 --> 00:54:08,649
I mean, war is one of the
only constants in history.
820
00:54:08,651 --> 00:54:11,453
And what can we as artists
in a time of war actually do
821
00:54:11,455 --> 00:54:14,223
at a time of international
and domestic crisis
822
00:54:14,225 --> 00:54:16,158
when we ourselves
are the worst stereotypes?
823
00:54:16,160 --> 00:54:17,892
We revolt. We revolutionize.
824
00:54:17,894 --> 00:54:21,062
We embrace peace,
and understanding,
825
00:54:21,064 --> 00:54:24,399
and sex and bring it to as many
people that will buy a ticket.
826
00:54:24,401 --> 00:54:25,970
Short of storming Washington
that's the most we can do.
827
00:54:27,937 --> 00:54:28,906
I liked your friends.
828
00:54:29,740 --> 00:54:30,942
Yeah?
829
00:54:32,510 --> 00:54:35,113
You got a little quiet there
at the end of it.
830
00:54:36,814 --> 00:54:39,818
I just don't think that
geo-politics is exactly my thing.
831
00:54:40,917 --> 00:54:43,185
You know what?
Forget about that.
832
00:54:43,187 --> 00:54:44,122
I'm just glad that you met them.
833
00:54:46,789 --> 00:54:48,756
Do you want to see that bra
that I promised you?
834
00:54:48,758 --> 00:54:48,792
Okay.
835
00:54:56,499 --> 00:54:57,434
You like?
836
00:54:59,502 --> 00:55:00,305
I like you.
837
00:55:06,743 --> 00:55:08,745
Miss Rose isn't looking so good.
838
00:55:09,847 --> 00:55:12,147
I'm not gonna comment
on you naming that plant.
839
00:55:12,149 --> 00:55:14,149
Dude, it's all about
being sustainable,
840
00:55:14,151 --> 00:55:16,484
you know, growing
your own herbs;
841
00:55:16,486 --> 00:55:18,088
and if I name her,
she won't die.
842
00:55:20,024 --> 00:55:22,024
Pretty sure that's
not how that works.
843
00:55:22,026 --> 00:55:23,127
I
have an idea.
844
00:55:27,497 --> 00:55:28,165
Okay.
845
00:55:29,800 --> 00:55:32,470
This is Mr. Snufflegus.
846
00:55:33,002 --> 00:55:36,874
Okay and I think we can put Mr.
Snufflegus right here with Miss Rose,
847
00:55:37,073 --> 00:55:38,807
and he'll watch over her,
848
00:55:38,809 --> 00:55:39,477
and she won't die.
849
00:55:41,245 --> 00:55:43,915
You guys are fucking weird.
850
00:55:44,914 --> 00:55:47,918
I always wanted a lot of the plants
and wildlife in my apartment, so...
851
00:55:48,685 --> 00:55:49,687
Thank you.
852
00:55:53,323 --> 00:55:54,892
I'm
going to pee.
853
00:56:02,832 --> 00:56:04,098
Now she's redecorating?
854
00:56:04,100 --> 00:56:06,069
Dude, chill. All right?
855
00:56:07,937 --> 00:56:10,305
I'm gonna run to the deli, and grab
some snacks. You want something?
856
00:56:10,307 --> 00:56:12,310
Yeah, the jalapeƱo chips.
857
00:56:32,997 --> 00:56:34,198
What?
858
00:56:53,082 --> 00:56:54,285
That ain't right.
859
00:57:03,961 --> 00:57:05,629
The fuck?
860
00:57:19,075 --> 00:57:21,709
James! Help me with
these fucking locks!
861
00:57:21,711 --> 00:57:23,078
What are you doing?
Where are you going?
862
00:57:23,080 --> 00:57:24,613
I got to go!
863
00:57:24,615 --> 00:57:25,846
What do you mean you got to go?
864
00:57:25,848 --> 00:57:27,348
Out! I got to go out.
865
00:57:27,350 --> 00:57:28,450
Why? You said you'd help me
roll the coins.
866
00:57:28,452 --> 00:57:29,383
You gotta stay.
867
00:57:29,385 --> 00:57:30,387
And I will later, I promise.
868
00:57:31,187 --> 00:57:33,120
But I have to go out
and make money.
869
00:57:33,122 --> 00:57:34,622
No, it's dangerous out there.
870
00:57:34,624 --> 00:57:36,191
I really don't think
you should go.
871
00:57:36,193 --> 00:57:37,859
You got to stay right now.
You got to help me...
872
00:57:37,861 --> 00:57:38,959
Please don't get crazy on me.
873
00:57:38,961 --> 00:57:40,797
Oh crazy, right?
874
00:57:40,997 --> 00:57:42,229
That's what I'm getting on you?
875
00:57:42,231 --> 00:57:44,131
I'm getting crazy?!
876
00:57:44,133 --> 00:57:45,767
James is crazy. That's what
you always say, right?
877
00:57:45,769 --> 00:57:47,772
James is crazy! Crazy!
878
00:57:47,872 --> 00:57:48,602
You know what's fucking
crazy out there?
879
00:57:48,604 --> 00:57:50,238
You wanna go?
880
00:57:50,240 --> 00:57:51,605
- James, if we use everything I have,
- I don't care, go. Go.
881
00:57:51,607 --> 00:57:52,707
I have to go get more.
882
00:57:52,709 --> 00:57:54,209
I'll come back!
883
00:57:54,211 --> 00:57:55,379
No, don't come back.
I'll see you in hell.
884
00:57:57,580 --> 00:57:58,415
Hmmm.
885
00:58:00,818 --> 00:58:03,321
It's like one of those bags
from Harry Potter.
886
00:58:05,823 --> 00:58:07,622
What?
887
00:58:07,624 --> 00:58:11,459
Yeah, like there's this character
that has this magical bag
888
00:58:11,461 --> 00:58:13,397
that's actually really small
but she pulls out things
889
00:58:14,597 --> 00:58:16,099
that would never fit in it.
890
00:58:17,501 --> 00:58:19,169
Just a shirt.
891
00:58:19,435 --> 00:58:20,535
Yeah, yeah I know.
892
00:58:20,537 --> 00:58:22,240
But like...
893
00:58:23,539 --> 00:58:26,140
You think you'd be carrying your
whole life in that thing
894
00:58:26,142 --> 00:58:27,310
the way you carry it around.
895
00:58:30,948 --> 00:58:32,083
Oh.
896
00:58:33,517 --> 00:58:34,484
Okay.
897
00:58:35,419 --> 00:58:36,386
Why not.
898
00:58:55,705 --> 00:58:56,941
That makes no sense.
899
00:59:15,626 --> 00:59:17,627
Lizzie! Come here!
900
00:59:23,934 --> 00:59:26,269
Um, so...
901
00:59:29,272 --> 00:59:31,175
I have something for you.
902
00:59:33,377 --> 00:59:36,211
I wanted to make you something
903
00:59:36,213 --> 00:59:40,482
because you totally inspired the
idea for my whiskey commercial,
904
00:59:40,484 --> 00:59:43,087
and I'm going to kill it now
thanks to you.
905
00:59:48,691 --> 00:59:49,960
You gotta open it.
906
00:59:59,102 --> 01:00:00,571
It's beautiful.
907
01:00:04,207 --> 01:00:06,042
Yeah? Do you like it?
908
01:00:07,343 --> 01:00:09,513
You totally saved me today.
909
01:00:12,515 --> 01:00:15,519
This is amazing. I can't wait
to see the commercial.
910
01:00:17,754 --> 01:00:18,990
You okay?
911
01:00:21,024 --> 01:00:22,627
Yeah. Yeah, let's go to bed.
912
01:00:57,526 --> 01:00:59,394
Do you have to go?
913
01:00:59,396 --> 01:01:02,296
Well, I'm pretty
pumped actually.
914
01:01:02,298 --> 01:01:04,866
Because Moon Drill is going
to buy my commercial,
915
01:01:04,868 --> 01:01:07,736
and then I'm going to move into
this really fancy studio apartment
916
01:01:07,738 --> 01:01:09,740
on the water and I just...
oh my God, I love my life.
917
01:01:12,276 --> 01:01:13,908
Oh.
918
01:01:13,910 --> 01:01:15,843
That's what that was
all about? Okay.
919
01:01:15,845 --> 01:01:15,912
No, you're not going to go.
920
01:01:17,881 --> 01:01:19,848
No.
921
01:01:19,850 --> 01:01:21,419
Okay, okay come on I really...
I actually, I really have to go.
922
01:01:23,252 --> 01:01:25,720
Okay, well I'm going to make you
breakfast first
923
01:01:25,722 --> 01:01:27,555
because you haven't lived until
you've tried my eggs, okay?
924
01:01:27,557 --> 01:01:28,355
Yeah?
925
01:01:28,357 --> 01:01:29,026
Yeah.
926
01:01:39,803 --> 01:01:40,801
I love that you're
cooking for me.
927
01:01:40,803 --> 01:01:42,504
Yeah?
928
01:01:42,506 --> 01:01:44,107
How much do you like it?
929
01:01:44,341 --> 01:01:45,109
A lot.
930
01:01:48,178 --> 01:01:50,678
Guys, it's early. Can we confine the
PDA to our respective bedrooms?
931
01:01:50,680 --> 01:01:51,182
Hey Avi.
932
01:01:52,582 --> 01:01:54,149
There better be
some breakfast left for me.
933
01:01:54,151 --> 01:01:55,984
And I hope you washed your hands
934
01:01:55,986 --> 01:01:56,984
'cause I don't wany
any jizz eggs.
935
01:01:56,986 --> 01:01:58,021
Says you.
936
01:02:08,966 --> 01:02:10,234
- Thank you.
- Yup.
937
01:02:11,200 --> 01:02:13,200
These are you jizz eggs.
938
01:02:13,202 --> 01:02:13,801
They are the house
specialty today.
939
01:02:13,803 --> 01:02:15,106
Mmmmmm.
940
01:02:16,205 --> 01:02:17,305
Ketchup?
941
01:02:17,307 --> 01:02:19,741
No, I don't need any ketchup.
942
01:02:19,743 --> 01:02:21,308
What's wrong with you?
943
01:02:21,310 --> 01:02:23,111
My bad.
944
01:02:23,113 --> 01:02:24,946
Who doesn't put ketchup
on their eggs?
945
01:02:24,948 --> 01:02:26,384
These are perfection.
Perfection.
946
01:02:26,984 --> 01:02:28,152
Thank you.
947
01:02:29,419 --> 01:02:31,088
They could still use
some ketchup though.
948
01:02:32,289 --> 01:02:34,723
Listen, if you want to keep
some perfection,
949
01:02:34,725 --> 01:02:36,658
I could stay and hang around
with you this weekend,
950
01:02:36,660 --> 01:02:39,020
cook some more.
951
01:02:40,696 --> 01:02:43,464
Sorry Callie, I've got kind of
like a big date this weekend
952
01:02:43,466 --> 01:02:45,066
and David promised I'd have
the place to myself.
953
01:02:45,068 --> 01:02:46,633
Am I right? Am I right?
954
01:02:46,635 --> 01:02:48,470
Yeah, yeah,
I did. I did.
955
01:02:48,472 --> 01:02:50,270
Besides, doesn't your
roommate miss you?
956
01:02:50,272 --> 01:02:52,108
She's super busy. I don't know.
957
01:02:53,642 --> 01:02:56,276
Well, one of these days I'm going to
have to go over and force a meeting.
958
01:02:56,278 --> 01:02:58,245
I told you, my place
isn't that nice.
959
01:02:58,247 --> 01:03:00,251
I don't care about that.
As long as you're there.
960
01:03:03,252 --> 01:03:04,852
I think I'm gonna grab a shower
before we go, okay?
961
01:03:04,854 --> 01:03:05,856
Okay.
962
01:03:12,261 --> 01:03:13,263
What?
963
01:03:15,999 --> 01:03:17,001
Seriously?
964
01:03:18,368 --> 01:03:20,801
I mean, she hasn't left our
place since you two met,
965
01:03:20,803 --> 01:03:22,703
and now she wants to stay
while you're out of town.
966
01:03:22,705 --> 01:03:25,105
What is that? What's with her?
967
01:03:25,107 --> 01:03:27,875
Don't be jealous that I'm getting laid
every single night for two weeks.
968
01:03:27,877 --> 01:03:29,544
I can't believe you
just went there.
969
01:03:29,546 --> 01:03:30,481
I mean, there was
nowhere else to go.
970
01:03:34,950 --> 01:03:36,250
Don't you think
it's kind of weird
971
01:03:36,252 --> 01:03:37,618
you haven't seen her place
972
01:03:37,620 --> 01:03:39,053
or met any of her friends
973
01:03:39,055 --> 01:03:40,321
and she practically
moved in here?
974
01:03:40,323 --> 01:03:41,388
No dude, she didn't move in.
975
01:03:41,390 --> 01:03:42,823
Really, dude?
976
01:03:42,825 --> 01:03:44,725
She left a toothbrush here,
977
01:03:44,727 --> 01:03:46,794
she left an elephant.
978
01:03:46,796 --> 01:03:48,562
Okay, well I'm going to go see
her place when I get back.
979
01:03:48,564 --> 01:03:49,930
Happy?
980
01:03:49,932 --> 01:03:51,499
Whatever man, I'm just saying
981
01:03:51,501 --> 01:03:53,133
don't get stuck
with a clinger, you know?
982
01:03:53,135 --> 01:03:55,537
Two weeks is a long time
983
01:03:55,539 --> 01:03:57,772
to shack up with some
chick you just met.
984
01:03:57,774 --> 01:03:59,040
Well I'm going to be on a
business trip this weekend,
985
01:03:59,042 --> 01:04:00,210
and I won't see her there.
986
01:04:01,243 --> 01:04:03,544
Is that hot actress you work
with going to be there? Lysi?
987
01:04:03,546 --> 01:04:04,645
Yes. Lizzie is
going to be there.
988
01:04:04,647 --> 01:04:05,649
David.
989
01:04:06,450 --> 01:04:07,915
Go after Lizzie.
990
01:04:07,917 --> 01:04:09,216
We're just like friends.
991
01:04:09,218 --> 01:04:11,454
Besides she's way over the top.
992
01:04:12,955 --> 01:04:14,357
And I think I really
like this girl.
993
01:04:18,694 --> 01:04:20,028
So I'll see you on Sunday.
994
01:04:20,030 --> 01:04:22,397
Yep, Sunday.
995
01:04:22,399 --> 01:04:23,997
Yeah I'll just come over to
your place after I get back?
996
01:04:23,999 --> 01:04:25,433
My place?
997
01:04:25,435 --> 01:04:27,535
I mean, what happened
to your aversion
998
01:04:27,537 --> 01:04:29,671
to going more than three stops
into Brooklyn?
999
01:04:29,673 --> 01:04:31,439
For you, I'll get over it.
1000
01:04:31,441 --> 01:04:33,508
Yeah, but I mean
you don't have to.
1001
01:04:33,510 --> 01:04:35,276
I don't mind coming to yours.
Mine's always a wreck.
1002
01:04:35,278 --> 01:04:36,613
Are you hiding something?
1003
01:04:37,046 --> 01:04:39,050
What kind of a question is that?
1004
01:04:39,149 --> 01:04:40,751
Nothing. I mean...
1005
01:04:41,917 --> 01:04:43,551
I don't even know any
of your friends.
1006
01:04:43,553 --> 01:04:45,252
Yeah, well why would
you know my friends?
1007
01:04:45,254 --> 01:04:46,687
You don't know me that well.
1008
01:04:46,689 --> 01:04:47,855
You're not my fucking boyfriend.
1009
01:04:47,857 --> 01:04:48,892
Well...
1010
01:04:51,093 --> 01:04:52,262
What if I want to be?
1011
01:04:53,196 --> 01:04:54,294
You do?
1012
01:04:54,296 --> 01:04:57,300
Yeah. I do.
1013
01:04:57,533 --> 01:04:58,535
I do.
1014
01:04:58,901 --> 01:05:01,069
So I want to meet your friends,
1015
01:05:01,071 --> 01:05:02,636
and I want to see your place
when I get back.
1016
01:05:02,638 --> 01:05:03,805
Okay.
1017
01:05:03,807 --> 01:05:05,109
Okay.
1018
01:05:51,787 --> 01:05:54,124
She disappears and
then wants love.
1019
01:05:54,624 --> 01:05:56,794
He wants to see my place.
1020
01:05:57,359 --> 01:05:58,963
I told you so.
1021
01:06:01,397 --> 01:06:03,865
You don't have very
many options here.
1022
01:06:03,867 --> 01:06:05,600
You either have to tell him you've
been lying to him the whole time
1023
01:06:05,602 --> 01:06:06,604
or you got to ditch out.
1024
01:06:07,269 --> 01:06:08,970
He made me this graphic
design of my name
1025
01:06:08,972 --> 01:06:10,470
except it was the wrong name.
1026
01:06:10,472 --> 01:06:11,975
It was so fucking sad.
1027
01:06:12,943 --> 01:06:15,946
Yeah. Only the biggest parts of
your life remain a mystery to him.
1028
01:06:16,946 --> 01:06:18,979
Look, we're going to
get our apartment.
1029
01:06:18,981 --> 01:06:21,316
Maybe not today, but
it's going to happen.
1030
01:06:21,318 --> 01:06:23,283
And when it does, you can think
about dating a guy like David.
1031
01:06:23,285 --> 01:06:24,285
Yeah.
1032
01:06:24,287 --> 01:06:25,289
Thank you!
1033
01:06:28,057 --> 01:06:29,624
- Hey John.
- Hey.
1034
01:06:29,626 --> 01:06:30,928
- Pass it off?
- Yeah.
1035
01:06:31,894 --> 01:06:33,563
Nice doing business with you.
1036
01:06:34,631 --> 01:06:35,930
How much do we have?
1037
01:06:35,932 --> 01:06:37,497
With what you just gave me...
1038
01:06:37,499 --> 01:06:39,801
almost enough for
one month's rent
1039
01:06:39,803 --> 01:06:41,769
not including a
security deposit.
1040
01:06:41,771 --> 01:06:44,071
Yes!
1041
01:06:44,073 --> 01:06:45,939
Girl, keep that in the
front of your mind.
1042
01:06:45,941 --> 01:06:47,908
I can't keep the lie
going that long.
1043
01:06:47,910 --> 01:06:49,776
Oh bitch please, this
is getting boring.
1044
01:06:49,778 --> 01:06:51,546
Now, clean yourself up,
1045
01:06:51,548 --> 01:06:54,115
and find a nice guy to spend
the night with tonight.
1046
01:06:54,117 --> 01:06:56,120
Preferably one you
won't get attached to.
1047
01:06:57,988 --> 01:06:59,319
I love you.
1048
01:06:59,321 --> 01:07:00,223
Love you.
1049
01:07:09,966 --> 01:07:11,732
A handsome
model in a tux
1050
01:07:11,734 --> 01:07:13,734
is running through the rain
looking for her
1051
01:07:13,736 --> 01:07:15,102
the beautiful one
that he's lost.
1052
01:07:15,104 --> 01:07:15,972
He's in the middle
of Times Square.
1053
01:07:17,406 --> 01:07:18,042
He can't find her.
1054
01:07:18,774 --> 01:07:21,241
He stops running.
1055
01:07:21,243 --> 01:07:22,278
He takes the Moon Drill whiskey
out of his breast pocket
1056
01:07:24,113 --> 01:07:27,515
Boom! Thunder claps!
The music swells.
1057
01:07:27,517 --> 01:07:29,950
He unscrews the cap.
1058
01:07:29,952 --> 01:07:30,853
Everything freezes.
1059
01:07:32,088 --> 01:07:34,288
He sees her across the square.
1060
01:07:34,290 --> 01:07:35,593
Her eyes sear into his.
1061
01:07:38,060 --> 01:07:41,729
He strides over to her,
takes a sip of the whiskey,
1062
01:07:41,731 --> 01:07:45,299
the clouds part, the sun shines,
1063
01:07:45,301 --> 01:07:48,201
he dips her into a
passionate kiss.
1064
01:07:48,203 --> 01:07:49,305
He holds the whiskey up,
1065
01:07:50,173 --> 01:07:52,272
Moon Drill Whiskey.
1066
01:07:52,274 --> 01:07:54,377
"One sip makes the
chaos go away."
1067
01:07:58,414 --> 01:08:01,417
Good work David.
We are so getting drunk tonight.
1068
01:08:01,885 --> 01:08:04,555
It's something
Callie said to me.
1069
01:08:04,821 --> 01:08:06,654
I get it. You have a girlfriend.
1070
01:08:06,656 --> 01:08:07,858
Let's do karaoke.
1071
01:08:10,593 --> 01:08:13,560
Hey, what's going on?
You guys go to NYU, right?
1072
01:08:13,562 --> 01:08:14,828
You should definitely come
check out this party tonight.
1073
01:08:14,830 --> 01:08:16,430
It's gonna be awesome.
1074
01:08:16,432 --> 01:08:18,032
Free shots if you say
my name at the door.
1075
01:08:18,034 --> 01:08:19,300
Hey, what's
going on guys?
1076
01:08:19,302 --> 01:08:21,335
You guys go to
NYU, right?
1077
01:08:21,337 --> 01:08:22,805
Check out this party tonight. Say
my name at the door, all right?
1078
01:08:23,806 --> 01:08:25,872
You guys go to NYU?
1079
01:08:25,874 --> 01:08:27,541
You should definitely check
out that party tonight.
1080
01:08:27,543 --> 01:08:29,109
It's going to be awesome.
1081
01:08:29,111 --> 01:08:30,678
Hey, start of school
party tonight.
1082
01:08:30,680 --> 01:08:32,447
Open bar with your ID.
1083
01:08:32,449 --> 01:08:34,349
You should come.
1084
01:08:34,351 --> 01:08:35,853
It's going to be great. You
know, big back to school mixer.
1085
01:08:36,820 --> 01:08:37,554
Thanks. I think I will.
1086
01:08:38,821 --> 01:08:40,688
Yeah, yeah! I'm
Alex, by the way.
1087
01:08:40,690 --> 01:08:41,191
Jessie.
1088
01:08:42,292 --> 01:08:44,725
Jessie. It's nice to meet you.
1089
01:08:44,727 --> 01:08:46,661
- Nice to meet you too.
- I hope to see you there.
1090
01:08:46,663 --> 01:08:47,828
Yep, see you later.
1091
01:08:47,830 --> 01:08:48,739
All right.
1092
01:09:25,235 --> 01:09:26,701
Donna, Kelsey, I'm
glad you guys made it.
1093
01:09:26,703 --> 01:09:27,568
Good to see you...
1094
01:09:27,570 --> 01:09:29,903
Alex!
1095
01:09:29,905 --> 01:09:31,406
Hey! Jessie, right?
1096
01:09:31,408 --> 01:09:33,273
Yeah, yeah.
1097
01:09:33,275 --> 01:09:34,377
I'm glad you made it,
come on baby let's go inside.
1098
01:09:35,244 --> 01:09:37,344
I'm sorry you have to have ID.
1099
01:09:37,346 --> 01:09:40,881
Listen, I actually think
I forgot it at the dorm.
1100
01:09:40,883 --> 01:09:43,283
You're not going to make me
go all the way back are you?
1101
01:09:43,285 --> 01:09:44,885
Just bring your ID,
and I'll be happy to let you in.
1102
01:09:44,887 --> 01:09:45,853
Hey... Come on.
1103
01:09:45,855 --> 01:09:47,255
Are you fucking kidding me?
1104
01:09:47,257 --> 01:09:49,157
You can tell I'm a student.
1105
01:09:49,159 --> 01:09:50,957
Miss, a lot of people
look like students.
1106
01:09:50,959 --> 01:09:52,926
For all I know,
you're a serial killer stalker.
1107
01:09:52,928 --> 01:09:54,461
Now either come
back with your ID,
1108
01:09:54,463 --> 01:09:56,363
or leave and stop
blocking the door.
1109
01:09:56,365 --> 01:09:57,799
Whoa, everybody just
calm down, all right?
1110
01:09:57,801 --> 01:09:59,066
We can just walk
back to your dorm.
1111
01:09:59,068 --> 01:10:00,300
It's only a couple
blocks, right?
1112
01:10:00,302 --> 01:10:01,203
Yeah, well that's not the point.
1113
01:10:02,372 --> 01:10:03,904
And this party is going
to be fucking lame,
1114
01:10:03,906 --> 01:10:05,572
so let's go.
1115
01:10:05,574 --> 01:10:07,608
Actually, I got a lot
of friends in here,
1116
01:10:07,610 --> 01:10:09,242
so I'm not going to
blow this party off.
1117
01:10:09,244 --> 01:10:10,745
You can go back and get your ID,
1118
01:10:10,747 --> 01:10:12,412
or don't.
1119
01:10:12,414 --> 01:10:13,283
It's whatever.
1120
01:10:15,217 --> 01:10:16,818
Well, what are you looking at?
1121
01:10:16,820 --> 01:10:18,219
I mean, fuck you.
1122
01:10:18,221 --> 01:10:19,455
God...
1123
01:10:50,587 --> 01:10:54,024
Ah yes, alone at last.
1124
01:11:15,945 --> 01:11:17,678
Oh yeah, you
pretty little whore
1125
01:11:19,615 --> 01:11:21,448
Gag on it.
1126
01:11:24,320 --> 01:11:25,556
No, fucking way.
1127
01:12:05,861 --> 01:12:06,993
Oh my God.
1128
01:12:06,995 --> 01:12:08,198
Are you fucking kidding me?
1129
01:12:08,597 --> 01:12:10,266
I'm sorry. Here, come on.
1130
01:12:10,367 --> 01:12:11,933
Don't, don't, don't.
1131
01:12:11,935 --> 01:12:13,701
Do you have any idea how
expensive this shirt is?
1132
01:12:13,703 --> 01:12:15,702
I'm sorry, I'm a klutz.
1133
01:12:15,704 --> 01:12:17,772
Get the fuck off of me.
I don't want you to clean me.
1134
01:12:17,774 --> 01:12:18,939
Hey, hey, hey take it easy.
1135
01:12:18,941 --> 01:12:20,073
Who the fuck are you?
1136
01:12:20,075 --> 01:12:21,943
Is this your girlfriend?
1137
01:12:21,945 --> 01:12:23,077
I'm just trying to
have a good time.
1138
01:12:23,079 --> 01:12:24,545
Get her the fuck out here.
1139
01:12:24,547 --> 01:12:25,679
Can I get some club soda please?
1140
01:12:25,681 --> 01:12:27,514
Thank you.
1141
01:12:27,516 --> 01:12:30,354
Fuck you. Get the
fuck out of here.
1142
01:12:35,257 --> 01:12:36,260
Thank you.
1143
01:12:37,726 --> 01:12:39,693
That guy was a dick.
1144
01:12:39,695 --> 01:12:40,830
Right?
1145
01:12:43,932 --> 01:12:45,769
Can I get you
something to drink?
1146
01:12:46,269 --> 01:12:47,271
Vodka soda?
1147
01:12:54,377 --> 01:12:55,479
I told you, you were
putting it in the wrong way.
1148
01:12:58,013 --> 01:13:01,017
Okay, you open this,
and I'll be right back.
1149
01:13:19,802 --> 01:13:21,772
Fuck yeah. You
pretty little whore. Fuck.
1150
01:13:23,772 --> 01:13:24,540
Gag on it.
1151
01:13:28,211 --> 01:13:29,546
Yes, fucking bitch.
1152
01:13:35,885 --> 01:13:36,787
Oh fuck.
1153
01:13:37,453 --> 01:13:38,187
Fuck.
1154
01:13:53,770 --> 01:13:55,772
Dude, what the fuck?
1155
01:13:56,471 --> 01:13:58,005
She even told us about the
wig thing the first day
1156
01:13:58,007 --> 01:13:59,572
Do you remember that?
1157
01:13:59,574 --> 01:14:01,642
Talk about leaving out
part of the story!
1158
01:14:01,644 --> 01:14:04,077
I knew something didn't add up
about this chick.
1159
01:14:04,079 --> 01:14:05,578
She's barely left the
house for two weeks,
1160
01:14:05,580 --> 01:14:06,947
you pay for everything,
1161
01:14:06,949 --> 01:14:09,082
and now she's in porn?
1162
01:14:09,084 --> 01:14:10,483
I gotta tell you,
I went through her bag,
1163
01:14:10,485 --> 01:14:12,519
and I found wads of cash
1164
01:14:12,521 --> 01:14:14,654
and this weird notebook with
names, and locations, and stuff...
1165
01:14:14,656 --> 01:14:16,624
You went through her bag?
1166
01:14:16,626 --> 01:14:19,593
Well yeah, I just felt
like things didn't add up.
1167
01:14:19,595 --> 01:14:20,960
But that's not the point;
1168
01:14:20,962 --> 01:14:22,228
you haven't seen her friends,
1169
01:14:22,230 --> 01:14:23,730
you haven't seen her place.
1170
01:14:23,732 --> 01:14:25,566
She could be a hooker.
1171
01:14:25,568 --> 01:14:27,367
Or a porn star hooker.
1172
01:14:27,369 --> 01:14:29,205
I'm dating a porn star?
1173
01:14:32,775 --> 01:14:33,977
Come on, you got
to scrub it here.
1174
01:14:35,311 --> 01:14:36,477
Get it clean.
1175
01:14:36,479 --> 01:14:37,547
It's clean!
1176
01:14:38,181 --> 01:14:39,246
No it's not clean.
Put some elbow grease into it...
1177
01:14:39,248 --> 01:14:41,514
Ow, you're hurting me. Stop it!
1178
01:14:41,516 --> 01:14:43,718
What's wrong? Don't you
see the grime in there?
1179
01:14:43,720 --> 01:14:45,288
Just do it like
this. Clean. Yeah.
1180
01:14:46,521 --> 01:14:47,755
I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?
1181
01:14:47,757 --> 01:14:48,555
No, I'm fine.
1182
01:14:48,557 --> 01:14:49,392
I'm sorry.
1183
01:14:51,761 --> 01:14:53,893
Are you free right now?
1184
01:14:53,895 --> 01:14:56,529
Can I take you to get a late night
snack or something like that?
1185
01:14:56,531 --> 01:14:59,200
I know this great cafe,
it's just right down the block.
1186
01:14:59,202 --> 01:15:00,470
Yeah, would be great.
I'm starving actually.
1187
01:15:02,971 --> 01:15:04,438
I want to go to the bathroom
first though, okay?
1188
01:15:04,440 --> 01:15:05,342
Okay.
1189
01:15:37,205 --> 01:15:37,804
Hey.
1190
01:15:37,806 --> 01:15:38,973
Hey.
1191
01:15:38,975 --> 01:15:40,875
What are you doing?
1192
01:15:40,877 --> 01:15:42,809
I thought we had this
good vibe going,
1193
01:15:42,811 --> 01:15:45,845
so you know, why
wait until later?
1194
01:15:45,847 --> 01:15:47,480
Come on, let's just
go get some food...
1195
01:15:47,482 --> 01:15:49,750
You know, have a drink.
1196
01:15:49,752 --> 01:15:50,954
Oh, no, no, I'm done drinking.
1197
01:16:41,770 --> 01:16:43,439
Hey! Hey wait!
1198
01:16:44,707 --> 01:16:47,140
Hey, listen didn't you say
would go back to your place?
1199
01:16:47,142 --> 01:16:48,608
We're done here, all right?
1200
01:16:48,610 --> 01:16:49,710
Just take a taxi.
1201
01:16:49,712 --> 01:16:50,911
No, no, no come on.
1202
01:16:50,913 --> 01:16:51,978
You must be starving.
1203
01:16:51,980 --> 01:16:53,714
I make really good eggs.
1204
01:16:53,716 --> 01:16:55,081
What are you doing?
1205
01:16:55,083 --> 01:16:57,086
I said we're fucking
done. All right?
1206
01:17:08,064 --> 01:17:09,263
She comes in here
1207
01:17:09,265 --> 01:17:10,834
walks around, makes it dirty.
1208
01:17:15,937 --> 01:17:18,538
There's nobody here,
but you and me. Shhh...
1209
01:17:18,540 --> 01:17:19,505
No! Don't suffocate me!
1210
01:17:19,507 --> 01:17:20,506
It's gonna be okay...
1211
01:17:20,508 --> 01:17:21,977
Stop it! Don't.
1212
01:17:38,194 --> 01:17:40,393
I'm back.
1213
01:17:40,395 --> 01:17:42,565
Ready for a glass
of Hudson Valley's finest?
1214
01:18:05,354 --> 01:18:09,892
No, no. This is my cardboard.
You can't have it.
1215
01:18:12,695 --> 01:18:15,699
This is my cardboard. You go and
you find your own cardboard.
1216
01:19:27,802 --> 01:19:28,768
Shhh!
1217
01:19:36,678 --> 01:19:37,780
Fuck!
1218
01:19:39,147 --> 01:19:40,447
It's okay. I told
her she could come.
1219
01:19:40,449 --> 01:19:41,314
Oh, it's okay?
1220
01:19:41,316 --> 01:19:42,715
It's okay?
1221
01:19:42,717 --> 01:19:44,117
What the fuck is wrong with you?
1222
01:19:44,119 --> 01:19:45,551
Oh my God, don't hit her!
1223
01:19:45,553 --> 01:19:46,252
Babe!
1224
01:19:47,455 --> 01:19:49,322
Babe, it's
okay, alright?
1225
01:19:49,324 --> 01:19:51,291
She's only going to be here
for a little while.
1226
01:19:51,293 --> 01:19:52,963
Nothing to get too
excited over.
1227
01:19:53,128 --> 01:19:54,394
Why don't you
just lay down?
1228
01:19:54,396 --> 01:19:55,265
Come on. Come on.
1229
01:20:21,556 --> 01:20:23,424
Fuck.
1230
01:20:23,426 --> 01:20:24,894
You don't like me
very much, do you?
1231
01:20:24,994 --> 01:20:27,060
I don't like being here.
1232
01:20:27,062 --> 01:20:28,694
Hey, guess what? The
feeling is mutual.
1233
01:20:28,696 --> 01:20:30,063
I don't like you being here.
1234
01:20:30,065 --> 01:20:31,432
If I had anywhere else to go,
1235
01:20:31,434 --> 01:20:32,265
trust me I wouldn't be.
1236
01:20:32,267 --> 01:20:34,968
Awwww.
1237
01:20:34,970 --> 01:20:36,873
Poor Chrissie doesn't
have anywhere to go.
1238
01:20:38,540 --> 01:20:41,108
Well, I didn't used to have
somewhere to go either.
1239
01:20:41,110 --> 01:20:43,911
How did someone like you manage
to get a place anyway?
1240
01:20:43,913 --> 01:20:46,082
Don't worry about it. I did.
1241
01:20:46,582 --> 01:20:48,581
Whatever.
1242
01:20:48,583 --> 01:20:49,515
Someday I'm gonna get lucky.
1243
01:20:49,517 --> 01:20:50,951
Oh yeah?
1244
01:20:50,953 --> 01:20:52,618
Hold on a sec, where you going?
1245
01:20:52,620 --> 01:20:54,520
You're gonna get lucky?
1246
01:20:54,522 --> 01:20:56,857
You have to make your own luck.
1247
01:20:56,859 --> 01:20:59,393
Yeah. This is New York City.
1248
01:20:59,395 --> 01:21:02,462
Do you know how
many opportunities
1249
01:21:02,464 --> 01:21:05,099
there are for young good
looking people like yourself?
1250
01:21:05,101 --> 01:21:07,233
No, I don't want to hear it.
1251
01:21:07,235 --> 01:21:09,402
And I know the kind of shit
you and Cece do on the street.
1252
01:21:09,404 --> 01:21:11,237
And let me tell you
something, Chrissie,
1253
01:21:11,239 --> 01:21:13,206
if that is your
real name...
1254
01:21:13,208 --> 01:21:16,242
you don't have to do anything
you don't want to do
1255
01:21:16,244 --> 01:21:18,010
to get a place to
sleep for the night.
1256
01:21:18,012 --> 01:21:19,979
You're a tourist.
1257
01:21:19,981 --> 01:21:22,448
I don't know why you're
running around with Cece for.
1258
01:21:22,450 --> 01:21:24,785
Okay, so I'm not going
to let you in my house anymore
1259
01:21:24,787 --> 01:21:26,018
I'm not going to open
the door for you.
1260
01:21:26,020 --> 01:21:27,653
Okay, you fucked up
1261
01:21:27,655 --> 01:21:30,424
because you're not taking care
1262
01:21:30,426 --> 01:21:32,762
of what you need to
be taking care of.
1263
01:21:33,329 --> 01:21:34,130
Okay?
1264
01:21:36,198 --> 01:21:37,831
Now get me my box
will you please?
1265
01:21:37,833 --> 01:21:38,701
Whatever.
1266
01:21:41,837 --> 01:21:43,205
Unbelievable.
1267
01:21:52,381 --> 01:21:53,212
Here.
1268
01:21:53,214 --> 01:21:54,217
Thank you.
1269
01:22:00,823 --> 01:22:02,124
My name's not Chrissie.
1270
01:22:05,561 --> 01:22:07,564
Do you want to know what it is?
1271
01:22:09,731 --> 01:22:10,934
I would love to know.
1272
01:22:13,435 --> 01:22:16,705
It's Katie. Katie Jo.
1273
01:22:17,640 --> 01:22:18,874
Stupid name.
1274
01:22:19,675 --> 01:22:20,907
No it's a good name.
1275
01:22:20,909 --> 01:22:22,077
Katie Jo.
1276
01:22:43,065 --> 01:22:46,302
Katie Jo. That's a
good name. Katie Jo.
1277
01:22:56,611 --> 01:22:57,614
Katie Jo.
1278
01:23:29,278 --> 01:23:30,280
Wait. Wait...
1279
01:23:48,998 --> 01:23:51,401
Shhhhh. Shhhh. Shhh.
1280
01:24:32,440 --> 01:24:33,542
Chrissie?
1281
01:24:34,709 --> 01:24:35,608
Chrissie?!
1282
01:24:35,610 --> 01:24:36,613
What?
1283
01:24:38,547 --> 01:24:40,216
I don't think
he's breathing.
1284
01:24:45,053 --> 01:24:47,723
I think he might have OD'd
in the middle of the night.
1285
01:24:48,623 --> 01:24:49,626
Shit.
1286
01:24:50,525 --> 01:24:52,028
What are we gonna do?
1287
01:24:53,628 --> 01:24:55,631
I'm so sorry, okay.
1288
01:24:56,397 --> 01:24:57,967
I'm so sorry.
1289
01:25:26,061 --> 01:25:28,331
You said that he's
got no other family?
1290
01:25:29,664 --> 01:25:31,298
Nope.
1291
01:25:31,300 --> 01:25:32,502
They're all dead.
1292
01:25:36,771 --> 01:25:38,404
Cece, if we call the
police right now
1293
01:25:38,406 --> 01:25:39,409
who do you think they're
gonna to blame?
1294
01:25:41,176 --> 01:25:44,180
The little homeless girls who
were here when it happened.
1295
01:25:44,680 --> 01:25:46,813
Then they're gonna
take this place
1296
01:25:46,815 --> 01:25:48,818
and they're gonna turn
it over to the city.
1297
01:25:48,918 --> 01:25:51,187
Cece, we could lose this place.
1298
01:25:53,422 --> 01:25:54,524
What?
1299
01:25:57,226 --> 01:25:59,562
I know he meant
something to you, okay?
1300
01:26:00,162 --> 01:26:01,129
I know.
1301
01:26:03,931 --> 01:26:05,831
But look around you.
1302
01:26:05,833 --> 01:26:07,836
This place is our fucking dream.
1303
01:26:12,106 --> 01:26:13,943
We can do something with this.
1304
01:26:14,743 --> 01:26:17,413
I mean, we can make this work.
1305
01:27:26,582 --> 01:27:27,246
Hey.
1306
01:27:27,248 --> 01:27:27,382
Hey.
1307
01:27:30,118 --> 01:27:31,585
You didn't have to meet me.
1308
01:27:31,587 --> 01:27:33,053
I could have found it, you know.
1309
01:27:33,055 --> 01:27:34,220
I wanted to though.
1310
01:27:34,222 --> 01:27:35,188
- Come on.
- Oh, all right.
1311
01:27:35,190 --> 01:27:35,758
Come on!
1312
01:27:38,360 --> 01:27:39,492
Come on!
1313
01:27:39,494 --> 01:27:41,327
Slow down, slow down, I'm tired.
1314
01:27:41,329 --> 01:27:43,332
We can chill when we
get there. Come on.
1315
01:27:44,432 --> 01:27:45,331
What?
1316
01:27:45,333 --> 01:27:46,465
I don't know.
1317
01:27:46,467 --> 01:27:47,800
You're being weird.
1318
01:27:47,802 --> 01:27:49,169
I don't know, Callie.
1319
01:27:49,171 --> 01:27:50,402
David, you're freaking me out...
1320
01:27:50,404 --> 01:27:51,406
Do you do porn?
1321
01:27:51,739 --> 01:27:52,742
Excuse me?
1322
01:27:55,010 --> 01:27:57,042
Avi sent me this video
1323
01:27:57,044 --> 01:27:58,911
and don't try to
tell me it's not you
1324
01:27:58,913 --> 01:28:00,916
because it is you in this like...
1325
01:28:01,583 --> 01:28:04,149
trashy teal wig
1326
01:28:04,151 --> 01:28:06,585
which you totally mentioned
was a thing with your ex...
1327
01:28:06,587 --> 01:28:08,354
So I don't know that
fits into it but...
1328
01:28:08,356 --> 01:28:09,758
it's you, and you're
like getting...
1329
01:28:11,459 --> 01:28:13,462
crazy fucked.
1330
01:28:16,797 --> 01:28:19,232
And then Avi also said he found
this whole wad of cash in your bag
1331
01:28:19,234 --> 01:28:20,700
and that he thinks
that you're like...
1332
01:28:20,702 --> 01:28:23,286
a hooker or something.
1333
01:28:25,507 --> 01:28:27,506
I want to be cool with that
I really do, but...
1334
01:28:27,508 --> 01:28:29,712
So I'm just a trashy porn star
prostitute hooker?
1335
01:28:31,046 --> 01:28:31,814
That's what's
wrong with you.
1336
01:28:35,417 --> 01:28:37,019
No, Callie. Callie!
1337
01:28:39,555 --> 01:28:42,988
No, you know what? It is me
in that video David
1338
01:28:42,990 --> 01:28:45,191
and fuck you, I can't believe that
you would be a on a site like that!
1339
01:28:45,193 --> 01:28:45,925
Wait, What?!
1340
01:28:45,927 --> 01:28:47,762
No, Stop! Callie, stop!
1341
01:28:48,931 --> 01:28:50,466
It's revenge porn, David.
1342
01:28:52,167 --> 01:28:54,337
It only ruined my whole
fucking life okay?
1343
01:28:54,468 --> 01:28:56,670
I was a teenager
1344
01:28:56,672 --> 01:28:59,406
I had this older boyfriend, and
he made me do all kinds of shit
1345
01:28:59,408 --> 01:29:00,907
that you wouldn't even
want to know about!
1346
01:29:00,909 --> 01:29:02,642
I didn't know that.
1347
01:29:02,644 --> 01:29:04,243
Yeah 'cause you
didn't fucking ask.
1348
01:29:04,245 --> 01:29:07,246
Well, look I wasn't
watching it, ok?
1349
01:29:07,248 --> 01:29:08,982
Do you know what my parents
said when they found out?
1350
01:29:08,984 --> 01:29:10,319
They said that I'm unsaveable.
1351
01:29:12,421 --> 01:29:14,187
I can't believe that you would
think I'm a hooker.
1352
01:29:14,189 --> 01:29:15,921
I thought we had something.
1353
01:29:15,923 --> 01:29:18,058
We do! We do. I just
let Avi get to me.
1354
01:29:18,060 --> 01:29:20,260
And that perv actually
went through my bag?
1355
01:29:20,262 --> 01:29:22,265
I make cash under the table
at the comedy club.
1356
01:29:25,734 --> 01:29:26,936
Can we please start over?
1357
01:29:28,570 --> 01:29:31,574
Please, just forget
about it, okay?
1358
01:29:31,873 --> 01:29:36,009
Please, I am an idiot, okay?
1359
01:29:36,011 --> 01:29:36,546
I promise I'll make
this up to you.
1360
01:30:12,413 --> 01:30:13,679
Wow.
1361
01:30:13,681 --> 01:30:14,182
Yeah.
1362
01:30:15,550 --> 01:30:16,552
So...
1363
01:30:18,020 --> 01:30:20,022
This is your place?
1364
01:30:20,187 --> 01:30:21,690
It is.
1365
01:30:22,190 --> 01:30:24,124
Oh, this is my roommate Cece.
1366
01:30:24,126 --> 01:30:25,558
Hi, it's nice to meet you.
1367
01:30:25,560 --> 01:30:26,792
I've heard a lot about you.
1368
01:30:26,794 --> 01:30:27,993
Yeah, nice to meet you too.
1369
01:30:27,995 --> 01:30:29,629
I don't mean to be a pain
1370
01:30:29,631 --> 01:30:30,333
but do you mind taking
off your shoes?
1371
01:30:31,199 --> 01:30:32,432
Oh, no worries.
1372
01:30:32,434 --> 01:30:34,166
Outside dirt, you know.
1373
01:30:34,168 --> 01:30:34,769
Yeah, of
course, of course.
1374
01:30:37,105 --> 01:30:38,237
This place is great.
1375
01:30:38,239 --> 01:30:39,072
You think?
1376
01:30:39,074 --> 01:30:40,305
Yeah.
1377
01:30:40,307 --> 01:30:42,008
I can't believe you
kept it a secret.
1378
01:30:42,010 --> 01:30:43,910
Well it wasn't all
my fault I mean...
1379
01:30:43,912 --> 01:30:45,047
you didn't want to come
this far into Brooklyn.
1380
01:30:48,350 --> 01:30:51,184
Listen guys, I'm on my way out
to meet a friend
1381
01:30:51,186 --> 01:30:53,353
but you guys have fun, and I'll
see you later for the fireworks?
1382
01:30:53,355 --> 01:30:54,323
Okay bye.
1383
01:31:05,167 --> 01:31:06,369
Hey!
1384
01:31:08,302 --> 01:31:10,305
I brought you a present.
1385
01:31:13,542 --> 01:31:15,041
Cool.
1386
01:31:15,043 --> 01:31:16,475
It's more than cool.
It'll protect you.
1387
01:31:16,477 --> 01:31:17,046
How?
1388
01:31:17,712 --> 01:31:19,714
You'll find out.
1389
01:31:25,921 --> 01:31:27,423
Now, go play.
1390
01:31:34,730 --> 01:31:37,063
Sorry we don't have a TV yet.
1391
01:31:37,065 --> 01:31:39,131
We just moved in so still
kind of getting settled.
1392
01:31:39,133 --> 01:31:41,136
No worries. That
shit takes time.
1393
01:31:42,070 --> 01:31:43,339
So tell me about your weekend.
1394
01:31:44,638 --> 01:31:46,740
It was pretty sweet actually.
1395
01:31:46,742 --> 01:31:49,142
I think I may have a new client.
1396
01:31:49,144 --> 01:31:50,577
Yeah?
1397
01:31:50,579 --> 01:31:51,577
Fuck yeah!
1398
01:31:51,579 --> 01:31:52,580
Yeah.
1399
01:31:55,784 --> 01:31:59,789
Does the new official brand maker from
Moon Drill Whiskey want a back rub?
1400
01:31:59,888 --> 01:32:02,057
- Ah yeah.
- Yeah.
1401
01:32:08,497 --> 01:32:10,332
You're the best.
1402
01:32:11,399 --> 01:32:12,834
What about you? How
was your weekend?
1403
01:32:13,334 --> 01:32:14,367
Um...
1404
01:32:14,369 --> 01:32:16,038
It was fine.
1405
01:32:16,471 --> 01:32:18,140
Nothing exciting.
1406
01:32:36,992 --> 01:32:39,826
Happy Fourth! Woo!
1407
01:32:39,828 --> 01:32:42,428
U-S-A! U-S-A!
1408
01:32:42,430 --> 01:32:43,432
U-S-A!
1409
01:32:46,467 --> 01:32:48,934
Hey, I'm going to go
grab some drinks.
1410
01:32:48,936 --> 01:32:50,236
You guys want anything
other than beer?
1411
01:32:50,238 --> 01:32:51,537
Vodka.
1412
01:32:51,539 --> 01:32:52,705
Vodka, you got it. All right.
1413
01:32:52,707 --> 01:32:54,410
U-S-A! U-S-A!
1414
01:32:58,245 --> 01:32:59,147
Happy Fourth.
1415
01:33:00,748 --> 01:33:01,751
To our independence?
1416
01:33:02,918 --> 01:33:04,483
Fuck off bitch. To
the here and now.
1417
01:33:45,226 --> 01:33:47,492
All right, are
you ready for this?
1418
01:33:47,494 --> 01:33:49,164
Oh, I'm ready.
1419
01:33:49,631 --> 01:33:51,930
So, a leprechaun
walks into a bar...
1420
01:33:51,932 --> 01:33:53,867
Oh no, that's gonna be bad.
1421
01:33:53,869 --> 01:33:55,501
No, no it's going to
be amazing, okay.
1422
01:33:55,503 --> 01:33:56,501
- Okay.
- So...
1423
01:33:56,503 --> 01:33:58,136
I think you should stop there.
1424
01:33:58,138 --> 01:33:59,272
This is happening.
It is happening.
1425
01:33:59,274 --> 01:34:00,505
Okay.
1426
01:34:00,507 --> 01:34:01,743
The leprechaun walks into a bar
1427
01:34:02,610 --> 01:34:05,310
and asks for a drink.
1428
01:34:05,312 --> 01:34:07,880
Bartender says, "Okay,
that'll be $2.50."
1429
01:34:07,882 --> 01:34:10,750
So leprechaun puts two dollar bills
on the bar and starts walking away.
1430
01:34:10,752 --> 01:34:12,085
The bartender goes
1431
01:34:12,087 --> 01:34:13,823
"Hey, wait! You're
a little short."
1432
01:34:17,691 --> 01:34:19,192
You are so lucky
that I love you.
1433
01:34:19,194 --> 01:34:20,196
I know.
1434
01:34:20,595 --> 01:34:21,597
Chrissie?
1435
01:34:24,466 --> 01:34:25,467
Chrissie!
1436
01:34:29,003 --> 01:34:30,506
Cece, told me you
got an apartment.
1437
01:34:31,071 --> 01:34:33,005
That's so cool! Maybe I
can come over some time.
1438
01:34:33,007 --> 01:34:33,975
We all miss you at the shelter.
1439
01:34:35,543 --> 01:34:38,577
Tell Cece I'm wearing the
protection necklace she gave me
1440
01:34:38,579 --> 01:34:40,682
and I keep putting my shoes under
the bed like she told me to.
1441
01:34:43,253 --> 01:34:48,253
Subtitles by explosiveskull
1441
01:34:49,305 --> 01:34:55,475
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