Original subtitles

(loud, dramatic music)

(deep, rumbling tune)

(eerie music)

- [Train Station Attendant] Train will depart

in approximately three minutes.

The following...

(attendants speech fades out)

(creepy, dark music)

(footsteps)

(creepy, dark music)

(footsteps)

(keys clanging)

(loud traffic)

(door closing)

(deep, eerie rumbling) (girl screaming)

(rumbling intensifies)

(banging)

(creepy, dark music)

(woman whimpering)

(creepy, intense music)

(woman faintly crying)

(creepy opera music)

- [Woman] No! (Crying)

(stabbing guts, woman gurgling)

(creepy opera music)

(gentle piano music)

- [Ella] Kevin.

Kevin!

- Yeah?

- What are you doing?

- I've been doing some research,

hear me out here.

See this is what I think,

see how you can see the Empire State building there?

Do you notice how you can see all of those buildings

all the way in the distance?

You know up Madison Avenue there?

- Yeah?

- Okay, well I feel like since I can see all

of those buildings, not just the Empire State building,

but like literally all of them all the way in the distance

from the sidewalk up,

there's only one conclusion I can make.

- And that would be?

- That the earth is flat.

- Oh Jesus!

- I'm serious I mean there should be some sort of curvature

there, some drop-off.

It only makes sense, scientifically and...

- Zip it.

Kevin, I don't care what you think,

where the Madison Avenue has a curve,

the buildings go sideways, flat, forwards, whatever,

the earth is round, it's always been round.

Check your information.

- Okay wait, look way down there in the distance,

the Freedom Tower, the former site of the Twin Towers.

Anyways, scientists have confirmed that no matter

where the sun was in the sky during the day,

the towers would never cast a shadow on each other,

it was just magical.

- You know what?

Before you open up your mouth,

make sure you confirm with me the topic

of your conversation, okay?

- I just...

- It's not negotiable.

Can we get outta here?

And can we also find somebody else to hang out with?

Kevin is a complete basket-case,

I mean don't you know any like really cool hot

soho guys who would crash a party or something?

- Yeah, I'll get right on that, find hot gay guys.

- Are you listening to me

or are you just whisking me away with your words?

- Both.

- What are you doing?

- What?

- What are you doing? - What are you reading?

- This is an encyclopedia of the serial killers

of New York State.

- Oh God, what did I do to deserve this?

I'm hanging out with a reject

and the walking dead over here.

- If I had any respect for you,

I would take offense to that, skank.

- Skank? Skank?

I'm not the one whose mom named me Tiffani with an "I",

I mean shouldn't you be stripping somewhere

in maybe some black lingerie or...

- Ella, drop it.

You're just lonely and horny.

Why don't you go hook up with Kevin over there?

You're both recently single.

- Ewww, Kevin?

All right.

All right Kevin boy,

here we are.

It looks like you two with me this weekend,

and I'll tell you what we're not gonna do,

we're not gonna dick around here anymore,

so why don't you try to keep up.

(eerie piano music)

(train bustling)

(traffic)

- Let's just get outta here.

- Let's just get outta where?

- The city, just for a couple days.

- Yes! And go where?

- Upstate.

My friend gave me this good connect for an.

I-stay bed and breakfast house in Swamp Hollow.

- Swamp Hollow?

No fucking way, that town keeps popping up in this book

all the time.

That place is ripe with murders and murderers.

- Oh great choice, Kevin.

- I mean, I didn't know about all that,

just thought it would be fun for the three of us.

- I think it's a fun idea buddy 'ol pal.

I can't think of a better idea myself.

We'll go upstate for a few days,

explore all the sites of the famous murders and murderers,

it'll be a blast.

- (laughs) You make it sound so relaxing.

- Come on, don't puss out on us.

- All right guys, the one thing I don't do is puss out.

Fine, let's do it.

- Okay great.

Just hold on a second and let me call my friend

and set this up.

I'm excited!

- Listen, I'm all up for going to the country,

and maybe possibly seeing some really cute country boys.

But, do we have to take Kevin?

He's such a dweeb.

- All guys are gross most the time.

- Yeah I know but...

- [Tiffani] But, he is cute sometimes,

when he's not being annoying,

which is hardly ever.

- Hardly.

- But, it does seem like he has a house connect

and if we don't offer him money,

he'll probably be too chicken shit to ask for it.

- [Ella] Free ride?

- You bet your ass free ride.

- All right, but if he ruins things man,

we may as well just get our own ticket and go our own way,

seriously.

- Okay, we all good, we got the place.

Check-in is tonight.

- Perfect, let's try to make the train.

I had to start working on the itinerary.

So many murder sites to see, so little time.

(traffic bustling)

- [Train Attendant] Ladies and gentlemen,

if you are not exiting at the next station

please move away from the doors and allow exiting customers

to leave the train quickly.

Thank you for your cooperation.

- [Ella] Would you put that thing down for a second?

- [Tiffani] Butcher Bill is one of the most notorious

of serial killers in the greater New York region

with a body count totaling over 35

that the authorities know of.

It's not that he killed that many

but the way in which he did so.

Most of Bills victims were missing men and women.

Runaways, hookers, you name it.

He would snatch 'em up off the street

then transport them to his barn compound

where he proceeded to torture and kill

with various pieces of farm equipment,

even parts of one victim were found inside freshly

made bales of hay.

- Hookers in the hay?

And you call me a freak.

Now that guy sounds like a super freak,

he's super freaky.

- Okay, you two are a different level of freak,

and by the way, one is not better than the other, trust me.

- There are like three different murder sites alone

right in the neighborhood were we'll be staying,

including our friend Butcher Bill's barn.

We're definitely checking out all three sites

and taking selfies to document.

- Oh my God, what have I gotten myself into?

A weekend of this shit?

- Did someone say selfie?

Selfie time, yes.

(camera clicks)

Our chariot awaits.

- Oh my God,

- you have got to be... - be shitting me.

- Howdy city folk, how was the ride up?

- In retrospect, luxurious.

- Well, she may not be much to look at,

but old Betsy here will get us where we need to go.

(trunk slams shut)

(deep, dark, eerie music)

- What brings y'all all the way up to these parts

I mean, why would you come here?

- Well for one, we're bored out of our fucking minds,

but from the looks of this,

I honestly don't think this was the brightest idea.

- Actually, what my friend here is trying to say is

this town is filled with such a rich history.

We couldn't help but be drawn to experience it first-hand,

There's no place we'd rather be.

- History?

I'm not aware of much of anything goin' on around here

to be makin' any kind of history.

- Serial killers.

The history of serial killers.

Apparently you guys in this town are trying to

corner the market.

- [Driver] I don't know what you all heard about this town,

but that kinda stuff,

killin' and all,

that happens everywhere, not just here.

You're talkin' about Butcher Bill and the likes

of him I reckon.

Well, he's done long gone

down in the penitentiary, rottin' away.

We all good people up here now.

Besides, it wasn't always Bills fault.

Sometimes them whores

be comin' in from the city,

be comin' up, stirring up all sorts of trouble.

Trouble that makes it hard to stay out of.

- Hey fuck-face, what're you fuckin' lookin' at?

(engine blows)

- Oh shit!

(car screeches)

- Pop the trunk.

Today, pop the trunk.

Kevin, how far is it to the house?

- It's about another

two miles straight down the road it looks like.

- I said to pop the trunk!

Today!

I don't know about you guys, but we walk from here.

- No charge, 'till next time.

Be safe.

(deep, dark, eerie rumbling)

- What a whack job.

I mean seriously,

if this trip is gonna be nothin' ut hanging out

with crazies like these,

I am takin' the next train back to the city pronto.

- He was harmless.

I mean, can you blame him?

You do have really nice legs,

and your dress is really short,

and your boobs are really nice,

and they are practically hanging out.

- Oooh!

- Don't worry, the women are in charge this weekend,

and besides, aren't you guys excited to see

some of the actual sites

of some of the greatest murders of all time?

- Okay,

you need help, the both of you, all right?

Oh, and by the way, try to catch up.

It's getting dark.

(creepy music)

Whoa,

this place is creepy!

- Yeah, sure is.

Isn't it awesome?

(Ella laughs)

- [Tiffani] You think it's open?

- Here, come this way.

They said there's a key in the front somewhere.

(creepy, dark music)

- Well, here we are in front of the house.

- Oh, real secure, leave the key right in the corner.

- It's the country, what could possibly happen up here?

- [Ella & Tiffani] (laughs) Butcher Bill.

- Whooo.

Oh you magician, you.

Now for your next trick,

you think you could find out which door we go through?

- Give me that.

Only one way to find out.

(slow, dark, eerie music)

Voila.

- Thank you.

Okay, so they said the whole upstairs is ours.

As for the rest of the house, off limits.

Lemme go first.

- [Ella] If must be safe, he's going first.

Giant wuss.

(screams frighteningly)

(girls gasp)

- [Kevin] Just kidding.

- You jackass.

- [Tiffani] I almost peed myself.

- Not bad, not bad.

I could do this for a couple of days.

Sure beats garbage day in the city.

- Okay, this is my room.

- Me too.

Uh-oh, it looks like the sofa for you Mobidra.

- That's fine by me.

Share a bed with perv-tastic, no thanks.

And he probably snores.

- No doubt.

(both laugh)

- Um, hello, I can hear you.

I'm standing right here.

- Don't even worry about it,

he's not gonna get under the covers.

And if it's a problem,

there's always the wooden floor for you darling.

(laughs)

Come on, let's go get our drink on.

Woohoo!

All right, who's in?

- Me.

- Me.

- Nice.

For you.

All right.

(cans pop open)

- To friends.

- To murderers.

- To some hot country boy up in this bitch!

(strumming guitar)

Whoooo!

- [Tiffani] Wow.

- Thank you, thank you.

- I didn't know you were a rock star.

15 more of these,

and I just might make out with you tonight.

- [Ella & Tiffani] Not! (Both laugh)

- Like I'd get with either of you anyways.

I do have standards you know.

- Oh really?

It's not what I heard.

That's not what Sandy said when she dumped your ass

for filling up a waitress in Charlie's.

Beer me.

- That's not what happened.

That's what she told you?

- What did happen?

- Forget it.

- We are officially out.

No more beer,

I guess that means it's time to hit the hay.

- Oh hell no, we ain't doin' that.

- What do you mean?

We have a long day scheduled tomorrow,

we have a lot of sight-seeing to do.

We need all the rest we can get.

- Yeah I'm actually a little tired myself.

- Okay.

You all have voiced your concerns,

and I hear you loud and clear.

But unfortunately,

you're going to have to kill me

if either one of you two wanna get any sleep tonight.

So, let's take a vote on it.

All in favor for going to bed tonight

raise your hand.

All in favor for not going to bed tonight

raise your hand.

Ah, well,

I guess that settles it.

Get your I.D., get your wallets,

we are gonna find a bar up in this country ass town

and we gonna find some drinks and stuff.

Kevin, get your phone darling.

You're navigating.

- Can I just say,

I'm having a really great time with you guys so far.

(laughs)

(deep, eerie music)

(upbeat rock music)

- This will have to do.

- You're buying the first round.

- Somebody please shoot me now.

- Well hello stud, my name is Ella.

- Howdy Ella, name's Steve.

Did you three stumble into these parts accidentally or,

plane crash? Land in a corn field?

- Ooh, you do have a wild imagination Steve.

I like that in a guy, it's sexy.

However, we just happen to be in town

and decided to come in.

Really, it's my friend Tiffani's idea.

- Tiffani, much obliged.

- Fuck it was,

I'd be dead right now.

- I don't know if I can mix that drink up but uh,

what would y'all like?

- Beer me.

- Make that three,

and two shots of tequila, one for me, and one for you.

- I, I like your style, I think.

- Cheers guys.

Cheers.

You know what that was to?

- What's that?

- The luckiest bartender in the world.

- [Steve] Why's that?

- You'll find out.

- Howdy beautiful.

Can I buy you some bourbon?

Real smooth stuff.

It'll keep you warm.

From the inside, real warm.

- Fuck off.

- Bitch.

- So hey, I just saw your moves there,

they were pretty funny there.

I liked it.

- Oh yeah? You like that?

- Yeah I did.

- You wanna see some more?

I got more. (Gina chuckles)

(Gina laughs)

- Really?

- Yeah.

That's how I do it, Kevin, by the way.

- You don't look like you're from here.

- I'm from the city actually.

I live in Brooklyn currently.

- Oh yeah?

- Yeah.

- I'm from here. (Laughs)

- Oh are you?

- Yeah.

- So you just like to come here and

scout guys with nice dance moves like myself?

Where are your moves at, show me somethin'.

- Well well well, it looks like Kevin's

nabbed himself an admirer,

and she's not half bad either.

- Oh that's Gina.

She's a regular,

and she likes to fuck.

(laughing)

- Well, that makes the two of us.

Way to go bro.

(laughs)

When do you get off?

Well, that was fun.

Well I guess we have to go now,

we'll be taking a long walk through

a very dark woods,

who knows what might be lurking around the corners

of this place

in the cold,

dark night.

- I can get Jimmy to, (blows smoke)

wrap up and I could give you and your friends a ride home.

- Wow, I thought you'd never ask.

Shotgun!

- Can I come?

- Yeah, of course hun.

- We do have to stop for some smokes on the way.

- Of course, let's lock and load.

- All right.

(upbeat rock music)

So, what does a hunk like you do here for fun?

- You know, nothing much,

hiking, dirtbikin',

huntin'.

- (laughs) That's a lot of N's.

- Wranglin', - wrangling?

- Stuff like that.

- I like that.

- How about you? - How's the big city?

- Eh, you know.

- I was thinkin' about movin' down there,

gettin' outta the sticks, ya know but,

time and, you know, it never happens like that.

- [Kevin] We're back.

- Let's go.

(creepy, menacing music)

- Nice place.

- Hey, that part of the house is off limits.

You're gonna get me in trouble,

it's my name in the I-stay app,

they will charge me a penalty fee.

- Too bad fuckboy, we're going exploring.

- Mm, fuckboy, I like that.

(laughs)

(deep, creepy music)

- Now that's what I call a bedroom.

- You sure it's cool to be in here?

Your friend seemed concerned.

- It's fine, should be fine, come on.

(erotic music)

I'll take that.

I got something for you.

(giggles)

Surprise.

(Ella moaning)

(erotic music)

- Oh, shit.

Oh, damn.

Take that shirt off.

(grunting)

Your ass.

(moaning)

- Wait.

(moaning)

- Gross.

(Ella moaning and grunting)

- Mmm.

That was great. (Giggles)

- I gotta go,

they'll be wondering where I am.

- They?

Girlfriend? Wife perhaps?

Aww, don't worry farm boy,

your secret's safe with me.

I won't tell anybody.

(giggles)

Y'all come back now, ya hear?

Toodles.

Man.

(deep, sharp, menacing music)

- Whoo!

(choking and gurgling)

(deep menacing music)

(creepy opera music)

(Steve gasping for air)

(gurgling)

(heavy blood splatter)

(creepy opera music)

(gurgling and gagging)

- I'm tired.

- Yeah, I think me and you should just go to sleep.

- Let's do it.

- Yeah, that was a long night.

- Pinch my nipples.

(Gina giggles)

(chopping)

(loud, menacing tunes)

- Okay.

(breathing hard)

(fire crackling)

(slightly creepy piano music)

(bones clanking in bucket)

- My God, it's the worst.

I'm not drinking tequila shots again.

Make it stop.

Okay.

(slightly creepy piano music)

Oh God.

- [Kevin] Fuck.

- So, lovebirds,

breakfast is served.

- How can you be so chipper man this morning,

my head is on fucking fire.

- Yeah, I think I'm gonna puke.

- Well first of all,

I wasn't hitting the tequila shots like you,

secondly, I wasn't up fucking all night

like the both of you,

and thirdly...

- Thirdly what?

- Thirdly, eat your breakfast and get your shit together.

We have a long day today,

and the first stop of the Tiffani murder tours

is the Codebrook Motel triple homicide.

- Oh God.

(creepy music)

(faucet running)

- [Tiffani] Kevin,

can you help me with the dishes?

- Coming.

- [Tiffani] Nathan Jackson

was the owner of the Flashback Motel,

since renamed the Codebrook Motel.

Nathan was good with electronics.

He had each room bugged with pinhole cameras

overlooking the bed and a bathroom.

In fact, each room had approximately 10 hidden cameras

hooked up to the master console.

Every night, Nathan would sit at the console

in his back office watching.

To say that he was aroused by this footage

would be an understatement.

Over a seven year span back in the '90s,

Nathan began sneaking in the rooms

of the guest that gave him a real good cam show

and would torture and kill them right where they lay,

and of course, it was all on camera still.

(deep, haunting music)

Candace was Butcher Bills seventh victim.

Her friends called her Bubblegum.

She was a working girl.

She was working all the way up until the one night

she ended up in the wrong vehicle.

Butcher Bills beige pickup truck.

Knocked unconscious, she didn't feel anything

until she woke up dangling from a meat hook

inside of Bill's barn.

And here it is.

- Terrific.

- Candace was drugged up just enough

that when the butcher had peeled all the skin

off her right arm, she screamed bloody murder,

but did not lose consciousness.

Same with the left arm.

In fact, it wasn't until the butcher...

- Aargh.

(Ella gasps in shock)

- You fuckin' jerk.

(laughs)

- Where did you get that?

- From behind the barn there.

There's all sorts of rusty things over there.

- Put that thing back, you're disturbing a piece of history.

- You are loopy.

Does your mother know how screwed up you are?

- My mother's dead.

- Sorry about that.

- I killed her.

(all laugh)

- Okay, okay.

Look, this is a lovely story and all,

and I can't wait to hear the rest of Candace

the dead hooker,

but, you know,

all the body arts and stuff and yeah,

serial killers and shit hangin' in barns and

fuckin' tools that you're rip people apart with but really,

I really wanna get outta here 'cause I'm startin'

to feel a little sick.

- Okay, fine,

just one more quick stop before we head home.

- What?

Why, why?

(gentle piano music)

Oh, how fitting, a graveyard, gee.

I wonder who and how many people died here,

and what was the tools that they used to kill them with?

Oh, and how bad did they suffer?

Gee, give me all the gory details.

- Actually, this story involves a young girl named Nora.

There are different accounts of the Nora murders.

So, it's almost like local folklore at this point.

But most can agree on some of the facts.

It was Halloween night almost 20 years ago.

She went trick or treating with her brothers.

She ran off without them seeing her

to the house at a corner of the street.

Again, details are sketchy as to which house,

what street, even her last name.

What they do know

is that the next time that Nora was found,

she was nailed to the inside of the front door

of that house,

just hanging there

like a big X.

- Oh that's it,

we are getting the fuck outta here right now.

- I didn't even get to Nora murders parts.

- I don't give a shit.

- Okay, fine, but tonight,

we are having a seance

to try and wake the spirits of Swamp Hollow.

- Oh the fuck no we're not.

Oh come on, man,

I had enough of this spook shit.

I just wanna see my stud bar boy tonight please.

- Yeah, me too,

but not stud boy, more like stud girl.

She kinda snuck out last night while I was sleeping.

I didn't even get the chance to say goodbye.

- I would take that as a hint dude.

Anyways, you all got to do what you wanted last night,

now it's my turn to choose.

It's my day.

- Your turn?

We have been doing this spook shit all day long!

All I wanna do is spend a nice day in the country

and this is not my idea of doing it.

Kevin.

- Well actually,

it was kinda cool.

- Okay, let's vote on it.

All in favor of a seance tonight

raise your hand.

Great that's two against one.

Let's go.

- Shit.

(creepy music)

- Hey guys,

I told you that we're not allowed to use any of the

rooms downstairs in this house,

they're off limits.

You're gonna get me in trouble,

they have my credit card information.

- Oh will you relax?

It's not like the rental office is next door.

I mean, don't you know where we are

in the middle of nowhere?

Did you not hear what the rapist cab driver said?

Middle of nowhere, okay?

And besides, they left a key right out in front

so we got full reign, and I don't care what you say,

but I am loving my king size bed.

- What in the hell are you wearing?

- This outfit will help me to better communicate

with the dead.

(laughing)

- You're hilarious, classic.

What do you do, carry that thing with you everywhere you go?

- You know how we roll,

always carry at least two changes of clothing

in our bags at all times,

just in case the day takes us somewhere unplanned.

Raver rule number 47,

I happen to carry three changes of clothes with me

just in case we were to encounter

this very situation.

- That's cool, always be prepared.

- Yeah well, you know how I get prepared?

Always carry lingerie.

Prepared!

(giggles)

- This isn't a card table.

- Is it not a bar either?

- No, it isn't.

- All right. (Laughs)

Let's get on with this, call up the dead.

I wanna see this shit for real.

- This is not how it works.

We need to focus and unite our connective energies.

Focus!

- [Kevin] Fine.

- Come on guys, please.

Let's take each others hands,

close our eyes.

Oh spirits of Swamp Hollow,

we thank you as visitors of your realm

for your hospitality.

Ooohm.

We are not here to disturb you,

but to ask you to enlighten us with your knowledge.

Knowledge that you're willing to impart upon us.

Nora,

Nora,

the secular world longs to know

what happened to you that horrible night.

Where were you?

Who were you with?

What happened to you?

Where were you?

Who were you with?

What happened to you?

- At the corner of a yellow maple road.

- [Kevin] Old man Detmar,

the owner of the corner store in town.

- I choked on his lollipop.

(both laugh)

- That's just great you guys.

You just ruined any chance of any connection.

- Oh, so fucking sue me man, I'm going to bed.

- [Kevin] Sue me too I guess.

(laughing)

(cards clapping against wall)

- I'm sorry Nora.

My friends are assholes.

(deep spiritual music)

(slightly grunting)

(angrily grunting)

(gasps in shock)

(blunt hit)

(creepy opera music)

- What the f...

What the fuck happened?

Oh my God!

(creepy opera music)

(deep eerie music)

- Don't worry I'm not mad at you guys

anymore for last night.

I realized you must have had gore overload, my bad.

- I'm not worried,

and did you just apologize to me?

- Barely.

Hey has Ella been in touch with you?

I haven't seen her this morning,

and I went to try and find her downstairs,

that place is creepy down there.

- How many times do I have to tell you guys

not to go down there?

Okay, you're going to get me in trouble.

Seriously, how come nobody listens to me?

- Anyway, she wasn't down there.

The bed isn't made and she isn't anywhere to be found.

(knocking on door)

- Oh shit.

(raindrops splashing)

- Ella?

- Hello?

Ella?

- Ella, you here?

- Strange.

- Is Ella fucking with us?

(sudden deep menacing tune)

Jesus!

- Um, can we help you?

- I've seen the vision since the dawn of time.

The curses are upon us.

There's nowhere to run

and nowhere to hide.

- Lady, what're you talking about?

Who are you? Why are you here?

- Why am I here?

That's a good question.

I haven't been in these parts and 40 years.

- Hold on a second.

Yo, this chick is crazy.

40 years ago?

This chick would've been...

- Negative 16 years old.

- Exactly.

She's hot though.

Ow!

Let's just find out what she wants.

- Beware of the danger that lurks in this world.

The spiritual presence is strong and deep in these parts.

The energy here does more harm than good.

- What about the energy on me?

Don't I get a face rub too?

- Why do you feel like old souls?

What purpose do you have here?

Are you here to disturb the dead?

- No we're not here to disturb anybody,

we're just taking some time off from the bustle of the city.

- Your lies do not become you.

Leave this place,

leave this place.

Why must you test the spirits?

Leave, leave, and leave now.

(rain splashing)

- C'mon, finish your breakfast.

Don't let broom Hilda ruin our last day.

- She just creeps me out.

(glass spills)

- [Kevin] Shit.

I think I saw some towels in the hallway closet.

(message tone)

- Sorry, ran off to hang with my sexy bartender today.

All your death talk yesterday got me all

hot and bothered I guess.

- [Both] Don't do anything I wouldn't do,

winky face, winky face, smiley face.

X-O-X-O.

- Well, there you have it.

I guess just you and me today.

- Yes, and today is my day, so no voting necessary.

We do as I say.

- And what do you say?

Well I guess the bedroom is outta the question?

- I will cut you fucker, don't go there.

- I was just joking,

you don't have to be a bitch about it.

- Okay, fine.

I'm sorry. Let's go fuck.

I'm kidding, geez.

So gullible.

- Anyway, let's just get outta here.

Figure it out on the road.

We can just walk into town I guess.

- [Tiffani] At least you have a plan.

- Let's go.

(creepy opera music)

(thud)

(grunting)

- So Kev, how do you like the country life up here?

I think it's kinda cool.

Laid back, but cool.

- Yep. I remember it like it was yesterday.

- Remember what?

- I mean, I remember country living like it was yesterday.

This is what I used to do.

I mean, not here but, you know.

It's all the same shit.

Whichever bum-fuck town you grow up in.

So I remember

all this like it was yesterday.

- And? Bueno?

No bueno?

- Well, aside form waste products for parents,

it wasn't all that bad.

I woulda punch my father back if knew he would

remember it the next day.

You know, that kinda shit.

- Wow, sorry.

- Same goes for my mother.

Bitch.

- Well, my perfect upbringing wasn't that much more fun

from what I remember.

At least yours was interesting

in a fucked up freak show kinda way.

- Thank you?

- Where the fuck are we anyway?

- It's just a little further.

(Ella crying) (menacing music)

- Oh my God.

- So, why did you and Sandy break up?

If it wasn't action with that waitress.

- It's a log story.

Action with a big black guy.

Story over.

- That's a joke right?

You and a big dude?

- No.

I walked in on her fucking her neighbor.

She didn't know I had the key to her place,

she was all mad at me for coming in without knocking.

- You are such a buzzkill.

- Apparently.

But I don't blame him though,

he was just another guy screwing some random chick.

She was the one that was unforgivable.

Whore bitch.

- Hey,

I'm sorry I brought it up.

I didn't know.

- That's okay.

It's all good now.

(menacing music)

- Oh God.

(crying)

(horrified gasp)

(menacing suspense music)

(creepy opera music)

- I'm gonna go have a smoke quick.

- I reckon you'll have a knee slapping

good 'ole time with that.

See, I'm kinda liking this country vibe.

- You are weird.

(creepy opera music)

- Boo!

- Oh shit. (Laughing)

- I got you.

- You bitch.

Scared the shit outta me.

Made me drop my smoke.

- I got you though.

This mask looks real, right?

I found it in one of the bedroom drawers.

C'mon, it's our last night.

Ella's not allowed to have all the fun.

(opera music fades, chair rocks)

(creepy piano music)

♪ Up here in the woods

♪ I'm getting drunk with all my friends ♪

♪ I'm up here in the woooooooods ♪

♪ Up here in the woods

♪ I'm getting drunk with all my friends ♪

♪ I'm up here in the wooooooooods ♪

- I like the direction your music was taking.

Much better than that uppity pop crap you usually play.

- Thank you I guess?

So, what's your story for real?

We've been friends for a while now but,

I hardly know anything about you.

Why are you so withdrawn all the time?

- And what do you wanna know?

- I don't know,

like who's the last guy you slept with?

- (laughs) Just like a man,

one track mind.

Last guy I slept with,

Lisa

the barista

at East Village Cafe.

- Get out of here.

- You're welcome.

For your wet dream tonight.

I like guys by the way,

just not boys like you.

- Like I'd want you anyways.

I mean what is there to want?

- Wouldn't you like to know.

You would wouldn't you?

Ella's more my type anyway.

Strong, sexy, funny,

you should take notes.

- Now it all makes sense.

- Keep telling yourself that.

If I were straight, I'd be all over you.

- Anyways, how about another song?

(strumming guitar)

(ice clacking in glass)

- We haven't even finished a bottle yet.

- [Kevin] Bourbon.

- [Tiffani] You lightweight.

Hey, so you know,

that Lisa thing was two years ago.

- Better was.

- Yeah.

Long fucking time without sex.

- Sex, I like sex.

- Maybe I should've done like you guys.

Get me a nice country boy, or girl.

I just kinda hopes that Ella would slip up and

play my team for the night.

That didn't happen.

- Play on your team, huh. Okay.

- By the way, you are cool.

I like hanging out with you.

- [Kevin] Gee, thanks.

- You are very talented.

I wish I could play the guitar like you can.

- Bet you do.

- You are even cute sometimes.

I'm sorry I give you so much shit.

I'm just fucked up.

- Very fucked up.

- I guess I deserve that.

I like you, you know.

You're very sweet.

A lot sweeter than the other friends.

- [Kevin] Thanks.

- You're not gonna rememeber any of this are you?

- Nope.

- Hey,

I'm gonna go take a bath.

Come and say hi.

- Hello.

Oh shit.

(slow, mysterious music)

(water running)

(door creaking)

(footsteps)

- Kevin, is that you?

I thought you weren't gonna come.

I've been waiting for you.

Well, aren't you gonna join me?

(loud thud, blood squishing)

(gagging)

(creepy music)

- You know, you really think I wanna hear this shit

from you all day long?

Ella, Ella, Ella,

I know,

you don't wanna fuck me.

Okay, so, I got it loud and clear.

You're not that hot anyways stripper.

Always yapping your mouth, you're just too cool for school.

Why do I even hang out with you?

Just say it, say it to my face.

Call me a loser okay, I can take it.

I take it from everyone all day long.

Even Tiffani.

Tiffani,

I thought you'd be cool to me.

Pretending like you're into me sometimes

and then you just go off on me,

it's verbal assault.

Where do you even get off up in black dahlia?

Oh, you're so obsessed with murders, whoopty shit.

Like anyone gives a shit.

Why the fuck do I even hang out with the two of you?

I mean isn't there anyone out there in the world

that is not a total dick,

I mean a real fucking veiny certifiable cock?

I mean what the fuck am I gonna do with myself?

Am I just gonna keep takin' this shit?

I am not going to let these toxic relationships

get to the point they get to next time around,

I mean you say a couple bad things to me, about me,

and that is it.

I can make new friends easy enough.

I don't have to continually take shit from nobody.

Like you for example.

Are you really just gonna treat me like that

and expect me to do nothing?

How do you expect someone to just sit there and take it?

You really think I wouldn't find out that you were

just totally screwing me,

fucking with me, using me?

You deserved everything you got.

Burn in hell.

(deep menacing music)

(thud)

And you, you sloppy motherfucker.

You left Sandy's blood all over the fucking place.

I saw it all dried up all over the house,

all over doorknobs, walls, all over the fucking place.

Are you fucking kidding me,

you think nobody would notice?

Fucking Sandy.

Did you think I wouldn't find out you were

totally using me?

Playing me, fucking with me?

You just think I wouldn't notice?

Are you listening to me?

First of all, thank you.

Thank you for taking care of that bartender for me.

I mean he just walks in here and fucks Ella just like that?

I've been trying to get with he for months

and he just strolls in here and ruins everything?

Thank you for noticing my dislike in that hick,

hope he begged for his life, scum.

(thud)

Bones in the fucking campfire?

Are you fucking kidding me,

you're just gonna burn up that asshole's body

right outside when I had guests sleeping in the house here?

Are you fucking crazy,

what if any of them got up in the middle of the night

to go pee and they look outside the window

and see you cooking human flesh on a fucking campfire?

You fucking moron,

I should just kill you right here at the table

for having shit for brains.

And then there's Ella.

What the fuck are you doing with her up in the barn

all day long, are you kidding me?

You don't think I saw you turning lights

on and off up there,

I was fucking looking in the window.

How the fuck do you expect to keep up with this killing

without somebody finding out?

I mean, it's just really fucking sloppy,

I mean what if Tiffani was looking in the window,

she woulda freaked the fuck out.

The last thing I need are chicks running around

the property and we have to catch them

just so we can kill them.

It's just really fucking sloppy

I mean, how embarrassing.

Nora would be ashamed if she was here right now,

if she saw how half assed you are sometimes.

Why did you have to leave us, Nora?

Why did you have to go over to Mr. Welman's

house that night?

What did he say to you?

What did he do to you?

Did he touch you?

Huh? Did he fucking touch you?

I'll tell you what we did to Mr. Welman, Nora.

We waited 'till he least expected it

and broke into his house.

Same house where he took your innocent little life from us.

We gagged that motherfucker before he knew what hit him,

that wiry little fuck gagged him.

That murderer.

Heroin is such a great drug.

It just leaves you wide awake and able to take

some really horrible shit.

And that's what we wanted for Mr. Welman,

really horrible shit.

We tied him up in his very own living room

and preceded to amputate his limbs

limb by limb, one by one,

while he is just staring up at us in shock

that he's not even able to feel any of it,

lying there on his living room floor

sobbing like a four year old boy.

Well good, good riddance to you Mr. Welman,

may you burn in hell, burn in hell.

(crying) I'm sorry sweet brother for slapping

you like that.

You know it's for your own good, right?

'Cause I love you brother,

sweet, sweet brother.

(crying)

You and me, we make a great team.

I think Nora would be proud.

Thank you for being my brother,

for doing the work that you do.

We're making the world a better place.

That's all that Nora would want us to do.

I just wish you was here to see us right now.

Okay, I'm sorry, I keep going on and on.

So here's to us,

two bro's

making a difference in the world.

May we continue to do the good work for as long

as the universe will let us.

Oh and thank you for Tiffani.

It's what beautiful work you do.

I just hope I can get the bloodstains outta the bathtub,

(giggles)

but don't worry.

No-one will ever find out what you do, what we do.

For Nora, nobody ever, and I will make sure of it.

You can count on it.

So, sweet brother,

with glasses held high, let us toast

to family

forever.

(glasses ding)

(knocking on door)

(creepy music)

Can I help you?

- Hi, I'm John.

- John?

- Ella's boyfriend,

ex boyfriend.

I was just wondering is she here?

I thought I saw her come up this way.

- Oh, that John, got it.

All the way up here in the country able to

track down sweet Ella I see.

Well yeah, of course she's here.

- Well, can I see her?

- Yep, sure.

Come right in.

(menacing music)

(door closes)

(John screaming horridly)

(creepy piano music)