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This programme contains
strong language and adult humour
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Ooh! Oh, no, no.
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Yes! Ah!
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SHE HISSES, BELL RINGS
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Ah!
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Erm...
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Quite windy today. Yeah.
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Christ.
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Ooh! Wrong way.
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That's how you do it, baby.
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OK.
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Oh, my God!
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Ah! Ah! Ah! Ooh!
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SHE BABBLES
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CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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Hello, and welcome to Taskmaster.
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Or as my nan calls it - blyahr.
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Being as she is long since dead.
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Our calamitous comedians are
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hurtling ever faster towards
a total loss of credibility.
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So please give them an
uplifting cheer
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as we welcome back Joanne McNally...
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CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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..John Robins...
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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..Nick Mohammed...
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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..Sophie Willan...
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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..and Steve Pemberton!
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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And next to me,
a man who confided in me that he
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finds his neighbour's wife
"hot as hell and twice as spicy".
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S...
LAUGHTER
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Specifically the neighbours
to the left,
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if you're looking at
the house from the road.
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HIGH-PITCHED: It's little Alex Horne!
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CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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That's the worst-ever one.
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No.
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She is nice, you said.
They watch the show. Yep.
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You said you like it
when she puts the washing out.
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LAUGHTER
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Hi, Greg. All right?
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Yeah, I'm great.
I'm great, actually, now.
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You thinking about her? No.
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Pegging those...
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Pegging those sheets up.
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Anyway, I've got some statistics
for you. Yeah.
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From the channel, about how
people watch the show.
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So this is interesting. OK.
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20% of people apparently now watch
it on a device...
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..like a mobile or a juicer.
Erm, we've got six...
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64% of people, most people, project
it onto
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a sort of large bui...large
building into...in a town.
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Erm, normally a big hall. And,
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uh, the other 16% - traditional
flatscreen TV still.
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Right. Uh, but on the floor
and looking down at it
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and dancing around it with some
music on.
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That's, erm, some statistics
about the show. OK.
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Ready? Yeah, that was my bit.
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All right, we're off to
an absolute buzzing start.
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LAUGHTER
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Right, what's the prize category
this week, Alex?
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It's the best thing for a person
that is meant for an animal. OK?
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Greg will give the best thing
five points
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and Greg will give
the worst thing one point.
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John, I'm starting with you.
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Well, I wanted to get something
that was fitting of
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a man of your standing and stature.
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Lovely.
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So I have brought an elephant chair.
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Yes, here it is.
It's called a howdah.
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Ooh.
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ALL: Ooh.
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I sort of actually like it, though.
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LAUGHTER
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It's meant for an elephant's back
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and you would sit on it
on long journeys in the past.
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However... Sorry... Yeah? Oh, I see!
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LAUGHTER
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God, I mean, I genuinely did imagine
an elephant with
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a bad back sitting on it.
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LAUGHTER
Genuinely.
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However, they are, uh,
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quite cruel to be used on elephants.
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They're damaging to their skin
and their back.
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Yes. So by taking one off
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the open market, I feel we're all
doing a little bit of good today.
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Wow, so if I give this
five points, I'm...
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..I'm taking one for
the elephant team?
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Big time, big time.
You're sending out a message.
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You're welcome, big ears.
LAUGHTER
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Nick, what have you brought in?
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You know when a pet is ill... Yes.
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..and you give it one of those
cones?
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To stop... One of those.
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I just think one of those
for a human - if you had, like,
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an itch or something, you could wear
one on your hand
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to prevent you from itching.
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Shall I show you his cone that he's
brought in? Thank you.
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I mean, you can if you want
but I already know...
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..I already know how many points
it's getting. Yeah.
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I already regret it, Greg.
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Here's the cone, quite a small one.
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Not going to be a surprise,
but there you go.
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Wow, well, cheers, Nick.
It's, uh... Thank you.
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It's pretty bad.
LAUGHTER
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Steve.
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It's, uh, a scratching brush.
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Here is your scratching brush.
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Now, this promotes skin health,
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uh, gets rid of parasites.
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And, erm, I was imagining you in
the shower.
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Were you? Yes.
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Before the task was set? Yeah!
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You've got one of these
attached to your towel rail. Yes.
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And, yeah, you go up
and down on that and, uh...
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Y-You've...
..give yourself a good scratch.
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You've imagined that I have some
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difficult skin to slew off,
have you?
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No, it's skin health.
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It's an impressive
load of bullshit for a brush.
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LAUGHTER
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Joanne. Yes. Uh, can you beat a
brush? Yes, you can.
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The present I've brought you this
week, Greg,
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is a trough.
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LAUGHTER
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Here is...Here is Joanne's trough.
Meant for an animal,
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but better for a human.
LAUGHTER
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Yes. It's both insulting
and yet appeals.
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LAUGHTER
Keep talking.
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People are going back to the earth,
building their own
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vegetable patches. I feel the trough
is next. Is it?
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You're imagining trough parties,
are you? Yeah.
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It's all very Bear Grylls-survival
stuff. Is it? Yeah!
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Yeah. It's very...
LAUGHTER
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You know lads -
they love making their own ham.
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This is, I feel like...
LAUGHTER
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This is what's next. It'll be
like...
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You quite often make your own ham.
We're always making our own ham.
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It's all... They're all going back
to the land with the moustaches
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and eating off the ham hock and all,
and I feel like this is next.
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GREG WHEEZES
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Sophie, come on.
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I've gone in a different direction.
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Thank God.
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LAUGHTER
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Well, I've got a pet feeder.
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Yes, one of these timed cat feeders.
Here it is. Timed cat feeder.
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I thought it could be quite
good for you. For me?
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LAUGHTER
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Just a little bit of discipline
and structure in your life.
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LAUGHTER
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I mean, basically,
what you're saying in that prize is
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you're saying,
"I think you're fat."
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LAUGHTER
I was worried about fat shaming.
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Yeah. I did ask the producer.
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They said, "No, no, it'll be fine.
He needs to hear it."
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APPLAUSE
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Well, I'll hand out some...some,
uh, points.
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OK. You're going to start with
the... With Nick, correct. Right.
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LAUGHTER
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So Nick gets one point.
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Steve, sorry. Two points.
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There we go, OK. Aw.
I don't want Sophie
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to be in control of
when I can have a treat.
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LAUGHTER
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Are you sure? I'm pretty sure,
so I'm giving her three points.
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OK. Three to you, Sophie. Right.
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There's something about these young
lads
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munching on the ham hocks that got
me.
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Joanne, four points. And, uh, I just
want the elephant chair. So...
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Fair enough! Five points
to John Robins!
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Get your straps ready.
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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Let's have a task proper, shall we?
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I don't want to alarm you, Greg,
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but there's something mysterious
lurking in our tent.
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THEY GASP
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Hi, Joanne.
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Hi, John. Hello, Alex.
LAUGHTER
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You're taking extreme measures
to keep the sun off your face.
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Yeah, I feel like I should be in
Gilead or something.
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Feel like I'm in Handmaiden's Tale.
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00:07:31,680 --> 00:07:33,840
Hey, Alex.Hello, Nick.
LAUGHTER
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How are ya? Wowsers.
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Work out who is following you.
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Oh! Oh, gosh. Work out who is
following you.
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You must stare at the duck at all
times.
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Yes.
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And take an average-length step
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towards the duck every time it
quacks.
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If the person following you agrees
with you,
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they will say the
name of a mammal.
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If the person following you
disagrees with you,
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they will say the
name of a bird.
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If the person following you doesn't
know
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if they agree or disagree with you,
they will say
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00:08:07,240 --> 00:08:09,360
the name of an
amphibian, of course.
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I've very little animal experience.
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00:08:12,240 --> 00:08:14,120
Why have you got so little animal
experience?
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Cos I didn't study zoology. I
don't know what an amphibian is.
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Right. The correct answer
furthest from the duck wins.
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00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:23,160
Your time starts when the duck
quacks.
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When I say "now", press the green
button. OK.
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00:08:26,400 --> 00:08:27,960
I'm going to release the follower.
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00:08:28,000 --> 00:08:29,960
You need to keep looking
at the duck. All right.
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00:08:32,080 --> 00:08:35,080
OK, Steve. You may press the green
button.
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00:08:36,960 --> 00:08:39,640
Oh!I'm so sorry.
LAUGHTER
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00:08:39,680 --> 00:08:41,320
Oh, my goodness.
207
00:08:41,360 --> 00:08:43,280
Argh! No, don't...don't start yet.
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Ow. Are you OK? Yes.
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Joanne, tell me about your
lack of experience with animals.
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00:08:53,680 --> 00:08:56,160
Isn't that terrible? I don't know
what an amphibian is. Yeah.
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00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:58,240
What is it? Like a fishy...
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00:08:58,280 --> 00:09:00,080
Like a... You don't know either!
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00:09:00,120 --> 00:09:01,640
Is it like a lizard? An amphibian
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00:09:01,680 --> 00:09:03,840
has an aquatic, gill-breathing
larval stage,
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00:09:03,880 --> 00:09:04,920
followed by, typically,
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00:09:04,960 --> 00:09:06,840
a terrestrial lung-breathing adult
stage.
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00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:07,960
Huh! Yes, OK.
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00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:11,640
Newts, salamanders and, obviously,
caecilians. Love them.
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00:09:13,520 --> 00:09:16,280
Let's go. We begin with keen golfer
John Robins
220
00:09:16,320 --> 00:09:18,400
being chased by a keen golf trolley.
221
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Wait for the quack.
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00:09:24,840 --> 00:09:26,840
QUACK
Are you a man?
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00:09:26,880 --> 00:09:29,360
Badger. Are you a sportsman?
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00:09:29,400 --> 00:09:30,480
Crane.
225
00:09:30,520 --> 00:09:32,240
Are you a actor?
226
00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:33,680
Kiwi.
227
00:09:33,720 --> 00:09:36,040
Are you a politician?
228
00:09:36,080 --> 00:09:37,240
Turtle dove.
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00:09:37,280 --> 00:09:38,440
Are you famous?
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00:09:38,480 --> 00:09:39,840
Wildebeest.
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00:09:39,880 --> 00:09:41,200
Are you a chef?
232
00:09:42,320 --> 00:09:43,440
Common ostrich.
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00:09:44,440 --> 00:09:46,080
I don't know what...
Are you a comedian?
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00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:48,280
Ruddy duck.
235
00:09:48,320 --> 00:09:50,120
Are you... Are you human?
236
00:09:50,160 --> 00:09:51,240
Typical pigeon.
237
00:09:52,840 --> 00:09:54,920
Are you a male...?
Are you an animal?
238
00:09:54,960 --> 00:09:56,080
Yellow hammer.
239
00:09:56,120 --> 00:09:57,280
Are you a robot?
240
00:09:57,320 --> 00:09:59,120
Gouldian finch.
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00:09:59,160 --> 00:10:01,240
So you're... Ah, hang on.
242
00:10:01,280 --> 00:10:03,560
You're male, but you're not human.
243
00:10:03,600 --> 00:10:05,280
And you're not an animal.
244
00:10:05,320 --> 00:10:08,160
Are you some kind of connection
for like a...?
245
00:10:08,200 --> 00:10:10,560
Are you a cable?
LAUGHTER
246
00:10:10,600 --> 00:10:13,040
Short-toed treecreeper.
247
00:10:13,080 --> 00:10:16,400
Uh... Does your name begin with A?
248
00:10:17,480 --> 00:10:18,480
Emu.
249
00:10:18,520 --> 00:10:19,680
Does your name begin with B?
250
00:10:19,720 --> 00:10:21,080
Olive baboon.
251
00:10:22,120 --> 00:10:23,640
And you're not hu...
252
00:10:23,680 --> 00:10:25,600
Are you a human?
253
00:10:25,640 --> 00:10:27,640
Californian condor.
254
00:10:27,680 --> 00:10:29,320
Do you have genitals?
255
00:10:29,360 --> 00:10:30,840
Holy cross frog.
256
00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:32,840
That's ambiguous.
257
00:10:32,880 --> 00:10:34,560
How is that ambiguous?
258
00:10:34,600 --> 00:10:35,720
Is the second letter
259
00:10:35,760 --> 00:10:36,760
of your name an R?
260
00:10:36,800 --> 00:10:37,800
Grey parrot.
261
00:10:37,840 --> 00:10:38,840
An L?
262
00:10:38,880 --> 00:10:39,960
Capybara.
263
00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:41,480
Uh...
264
00:10:41,520 --> 00:10:43,840
Is the third letter a vowel?
265
00:10:43,880 --> 00:10:45,920
Malayan tapir.
266
00:10:45,960 --> 00:10:47,040
Is it A?
267
00:10:47,080 --> 00:10:48,160
Golden pheasant.
268
00:10:48,200 --> 00:10:49,760
Is it E? Is it I?
269
00:10:49,800 --> 00:10:50,800
O?
270
00:10:50,840 --> 00:10:51,840
Pygmy hippopotamus.
271
00:10:51,880 --> 00:10:53,680
OK so B-L-O.
272
00:10:55,680 --> 00:10:57,480
Are you Mr Blobby?
273
00:10:57,520 --> 00:10:59,080
Bactrian camel.
274
00:10:59,120 --> 00:11:00,600
Yeah, so you're Mr Blobby.
275
00:11:00,640 --> 00:11:01,920
You may have a look.
276
00:11:08,040 --> 00:11:10,640
Fucking hell. Not bad!
277
00:11:10,680 --> 00:11:12,680
APPLAUSE
278
00:11:12,720 --> 00:11:15,120
Come on, you. Let's get you home.
279
00:11:17,280 --> 00:11:18,880
Well done, John.
280
00:11:18,920 --> 00:11:21,400
Well, I guess we should briefly
discuss, "Are you a cable?"
281
00:11:23,720 --> 00:11:27,520
Cable is surely the only thing
that's not human that has a gender.
282
00:11:27,560 --> 00:11:30,880
Oh. Like, male-to-female connections.
Oh, I see! OK. Oh, wow.
283
00:11:30,920 --> 00:11:33,040
So I thought it might be a
scart lead.
284
00:11:36,840 --> 00:11:39,960
Well, you got there. He was 19 paces
from the duck.
285
00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:42,480
OK. Let's see how Steve and Joanne
got on with,
286
00:11:42,520 --> 00:11:44,400
to quote Joanne from episode one,
287
00:11:44,440 --> 00:11:46,960
"The best physical comedian
of our generation."
288
00:11:48,320 --> 00:11:50,520
QUACK
Jesus Christ!
289
00:11:51,560 --> 00:11:53,560
QUACK
290
00:11:53,600 --> 00:11:55,680
Hey, it's good being
a man, isn't it?
291
00:11:55,720 --> 00:11:56,840
Badger.
292
00:11:56,880 --> 00:11:58,120
Are you a human?
293
00:11:58,160 --> 00:11:59,160
Kiwi.
294
00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:00,200
Is a kiwi a mammal?
295
00:12:00,240 --> 00:12:01,440
What the fuck is a kiwi?
296
00:12:01,480 --> 00:12:03,560
LAUGHTER
Keep stepping, Joanne.
297
00:12:03,600 --> 00:12:04,720
So reading the news,
298
00:12:04,760 --> 00:12:05,760
do you enjoy that?
299
00:12:05,800 --> 00:12:07,280
Vulturine guinea fowl.
300
00:12:07,320 --> 00:12:08,520
Another step please, Steve.
301
00:12:08,560 --> 00:12:10,240
OK. Every quack.
302
00:12:10,280 --> 00:12:12,720
Are you...food?
303
00:12:12,760 --> 00:12:14,000
Glaucous gull.
304
00:12:14,040 --> 00:12:15,600
Are you a famous thing?
305
00:12:15,640 --> 00:12:16,680
Badger.
306
00:12:16,720 --> 00:12:19,560
Are you the Eiffel Tower, like,
something like that?
307
00:12:19,600 --> 00:12:20,920
Tawny frogmouth.
308
00:12:22,680 --> 00:12:24,280
What else is there?
309
00:12:24,320 --> 00:12:27,320
Being operated by another human
is tough, right?
310
00:12:27,360 --> 00:12:29,560
Hairy-eared dwarf lemur.
311
00:12:29,600 --> 00:12:31,880
Can I get inside you?
312
00:12:31,920 --> 00:12:34,000
LAUGHTER
313
00:12:34,040 --> 00:12:35,160
Aardvark.
314
00:12:37,680 --> 00:12:39,520
Are you a glove puppet?
315
00:12:39,560 --> 00:12:40,600
Gouldian finch.
316
00:12:40,640 --> 00:12:41,960
Are you some kind of
317
00:12:42,000 --> 00:12:43,560
children's TV character?
318
00:12:43,600 --> 00:12:45,840
QUACK
Pygmy jerboa. A jerboa!
319
00:12:45,880 --> 00:12:48,200
Please step.
LAUGHTER
320
00:12:48,240 --> 00:12:49,560
Do you have a one-word name?
321
00:12:49,600 --> 00:12:50,720
Northern shoveler.
322
00:12:50,760 --> 00:12:52,840
Oh! Is it Mr something?
323
00:12:52,880 --> 00:12:54,800
Rondo dwarf bushbaby.
324
00:12:54,840 --> 00:12:56,320
OK, Mr something.
325
00:12:56,360 --> 00:12:58,400
Have I met you? Have I been in you?
326
00:12:58,440 --> 00:13:00,520
Common midwife toad.
327
00:13:00,560 --> 00:13:01,560
What's that?
328
00:13:01,600 --> 00:13:04,120
We don't know if you've met him
or her.
329
00:13:04,160 --> 00:13:05,840
Has it been on telly?
330
00:13:05,880 --> 00:13:07,120
Olive baboon.
331
00:13:09,680 --> 00:13:11,200
Are you Mr Blobby?
332
00:13:11,240 --> 00:13:13,080
AUDIENCE EXCLAIMS
Donkey.
333
00:13:13,120 --> 00:13:15,080
What's that?
QUACK
334
00:13:15,120 --> 00:13:16,360
Amphibian?
335
00:13:16,400 --> 00:13:17,800
LAUGHTER
Does that mean they don't know
336
00:13:17,840 --> 00:13:18,920
if they're Mr Blobby?
337
00:13:20,440 --> 00:13:22,360
QUACK
Sorry, her replies are more
338
00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:24,800
confusing than anything else.
339
00:13:24,840 --> 00:13:28,000
Is it B, C, D, F, G, H?
340
00:13:28,040 --> 00:13:29,320
Eurasian lynx.
341
00:13:29,360 --> 00:13:30,440
Is it B, C?
342
00:13:30,480 --> 00:13:31,680
Etruscan shrew.
343
00:13:31,720 --> 00:13:33,160
So it's... Is it B?
344
00:13:33,200 --> 00:13:34,400
Slender loris.
345
00:13:34,440 --> 00:13:36,640
Mr B. Mr Bojangles.
346
00:13:36,680 --> 00:13:37,960
Are you Mr Blobby?
347
00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:40,000
Bengal tiger.
QUACK
348
00:13:40,040 --> 00:13:42,200
That's a tiger.
QUACK
349
00:13:42,240 --> 00:13:43,960
Agrees.
350
00:13:44,000 --> 00:13:46,760
Mr...Blobby!
351
00:13:46,800 --> 00:13:49,360
Exotic Shorthair cat.
QUACK
352
00:13:51,120 --> 00:13:53,440
I'm stopping there cos I think
I'm right.
353
00:13:53,480 --> 00:13:55,560
So you ARE Mr Blobby. Fuck off!
354
00:13:55,600 --> 00:13:57,200
Ah! Oh, my God!
355
00:13:59,560 --> 00:14:01,000
Come on, Blob.
356
00:14:05,560 --> 00:14:07,560
I don't want him. It's coming for
you, baby.
357
00:14:11,520 --> 00:14:13,520
LAUGHTER
358
00:14:18,520 --> 00:14:19,840
Well, Steve.
359
00:14:19,880 --> 00:14:23,160
If someone said Mr B, I wouldn't have
gone Bojangles.
360
00:14:23,200 --> 00:14:26,280
Hearing the quacks with the
Handmaid's Tale bonnet on,
361
00:14:26,320 --> 00:14:29,920
thinking about statements that had
to be not questions,
362
00:14:29,960 --> 00:14:33,240
being chased by Mr fucking Blobby...
LAUGHTER
363
00:14:33,280 --> 00:14:35,480
That is his first name.
..who kept hitting you.
364
00:14:35,520 --> 00:14:38,640
So like John, I only came up with
the sort of alphabet thing
365
00:14:38,680 --> 00:14:41,840
when the duck was pretty close.
15 paces from the duck.
366
00:14:41,880 --> 00:14:44,320
Joanne. Yeah. It's quite the
contrast to
367
00:14:44,360 --> 00:14:47,480
the forensic things we've seen
so far. Uh-huh.
368
00:14:47,520 --> 00:14:50,440
Uh, "Is a kiwi a mammal?"
369
00:14:50,480 --> 00:14:53,200
Pause. "What's a fucking kiwi?"
370
00:14:53,240 --> 00:14:54,440
LAUGHTER
371
00:14:54,480 --> 00:14:57,320
And then you went,
"If you're not human,
372
00:14:57,360 --> 00:15:00,720
"you must be the Eiffel Tower."
The Eiffel Tower.
373
00:15:02,200 --> 00:15:04,400
Then your next question was,
374
00:15:04,440 --> 00:15:06,960
"Can I get inside you?" Yeah.
375
00:15:07,000 --> 00:15:11,960
So I'm thinking, "Is it a building?"
Ah! "Can I step inside you?"
376
00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:14,840
Not, "Can I, like, penetrate you?"
Oh, right. Yeah.
377
00:15:14,880 --> 00:15:16,800
But you were kind of hurling out
just objects.
378
00:15:16,840 --> 00:15:19,080
And then, suddenly - Blobby. Yeah.
379
00:15:19,120 --> 00:15:21,240
And that's because your go-to thing
is Blob.
380
00:15:21,280 --> 00:15:23,600
I genuinely am a really big
Mr Blobby fan.
381
00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:25,640
Think he's amazing. I tried to buy
his outfit.
382
00:15:25,680 --> 00:15:27,320
Do you remember he went on sale?
Yeah!
383
00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:29,800
I mean, the woman's Blobby-obsessed!
384
00:15:29,840 --> 00:15:32,160
And it really helped. She got to
the correct answer
385
00:15:32,200 --> 00:15:33,480
much before the other two.
386
00:15:33,520 --> 00:15:35,560
She got 26 steps away from the duck,
387
00:15:35,600 --> 00:15:38,040
and that was after not believing it
was Blobby. She carried on
388
00:15:38,080 --> 00:15:40,520
stepping for quite a while after
getting the correct answer.
389
00:15:40,560 --> 00:15:43,200
And she was overjoyed when she
turned around and saw her hero.
390
00:15:43,240 --> 00:15:46,360
Right. So, yeah, at the moment,
it's Joanne, then John, then Steve.
391
00:15:46,400 --> 00:15:47,680
All right, advert time now.
392
00:15:47,720 --> 00:15:50,240
Hopefully, one of them will make
health claims for
393
00:15:50,280 --> 00:15:53,520
a food that they know full well
is pumped full of sugar.
394
00:15:53,560 --> 00:15:55,000
See you in a minute.
395
00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:08,040
Hello! Welcome back to Taskmaster.
396
00:16:08,080 --> 00:16:10,880
What were our contestants doing in
a field, young man?
397
00:16:10,920 --> 00:16:13,120
Well, it's a fine question.
They were trying to work out
398
00:16:13,160 --> 00:16:15,760
who's following them on an
automatic golf trolley, Greg.
399
00:16:15,800 --> 00:16:17,520
They can ask questions or make
statements.
400
00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:19,680
If the person agrees, they'll hear
a mammal in response.
401
00:16:19,720 --> 00:16:20,880
If they disagree, it's a bird.
402
00:16:20,920 --> 00:16:22,880
And if it's ambiguous, they'll hear
an amphibian
403
00:16:22,920 --> 00:16:25,080
because it sounds a little bit like
ambiguous.
LAUGHTER
404
00:16:25,120 --> 00:16:27,840
Finally, how long will it take
Nick and Sophie to work out that
405
00:16:27,880 --> 00:16:30,720
Mr Blobby's following them?
Here we go.
406
00:16:30,760 --> 00:16:33,320
QUACK
Erm...
407
00:16:33,360 --> 00:16:34,960
Have you got blonde hair?
408
00:16:35,000 --> 00:16:37,360
Kiwi. Kiwi?!
409
00:16:37,400 --> 00:16:39,920
That's a fruit!
LAUGHTER
410
00:16:39,960 --> 00:16:43,280
Are you, uh, human?
411
00:16:43,320 --> 00:16:44,760
Kiwi.
412
00:16:44,800 --> 00:16:47,440
Are you smaller than a large tree?
413
00:16:47,480 --> 00:16:48,560
Donkey.
414
00:16:48,600 --> 00:16:49,920
Are we friends from school?
415
00:16:49,960 --> 00:16:52,800
LAUGHTER
No, no, no, cos it's...
416
00:16:52,840 --> 00:16:55,040
Did I meet you in the last five
years?
417
00:16:55,080 --> 00:16:57,080
Common midwife toad.
418
00:16:57,120 --> 00:16:59,320
Ugh! Do you have four legs?
419
00:16:59,360 --> 00:17:01,320
Californian condor.
420
00:17:01,360 --> 00:17:02,680
Do you have two legs?
421
00:17:02,720 --> 00:17:04,040
Bengal tiger.
422
00:17:04,080 --> 00:17:05,760
Are you over 30?
423
00:17:05,800 --> 00:17:08,200
Donkey. OK.
424
00:17:08,240 --> 00:17:10,720
Have you used an Excel sheet?
425
00:17:10,760 --> 00:17:12,760
LAUGHTER
426
00:17:12,800 --> 00:17:14,160
Glaucous gull.
427
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:15,880
Are you on TV?
428
00:17:15,920 --> 00:17:17,360
Pygmy jerboa.
429
00:17:17,400 --> 00:17:19,240
Are you on BBC?
430
00:17:19,280 --> 00:17:20,680
Capybara.
431
00:17:20,720 --> 00:17:22,680
Oh, no. This duck's approaching.
432
00:17:22,720 --> 00:17:26,280
Have we ever been drunk together?
LAUGHTER
433
00:17:26,320 --> 00:17:28,120
Common mudpuppy.
434
00:17:28,160 --> 00:17:31,080
That means, yeah, I think.
Doesn't it?
435
00:17:31,120 --> 00:17:32,960
Oh, I can't wait... If you get to
the duck,
436
00:17:33,000 --> 00:17:34,960
you can just keep sort of pacing at
the duck
437
00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:36,640
and we'll just do it on time instead.
438
00:17:36,680 --> 00:17:37,680
Uh, British?
439
00:17:37,720 --> 00:17:39,160
Pygmy hippopotamus.
440
00:17:39,200 --> 00:17:40,440
Oh, you ARE British.
441
00:17:40,480 --> 00:17:41,680
Are you an athlete?
442
00:17:41,720 --> 00:17:42,760
Northern shoveler.
443
00:17:42,800 --> 00:17:44,280
Are you a cartoon character?
444
00:17:44,320 --> 00:17:45,680
Are you a big grasshopper?
445
00:17:45,720 --> 00:17:47,520
Are you a mascot of some kind?
446
00:17:47,560 --> 00:17:50,800
Are you on the box of any kind
of food-related stuff?
447
00:17:50,840 --> 00:17:52,120
Is it Alex?
448
00:17:52,160 --> 00:17:54,160
LAUGHTER
All right. Erm, yeah.
449
00:17:54,200 --> 00:17:57,520
I think you're just going to stay
here with the duck. Am I? Oh, right.
OK.
450
00:17:57,560 --> 00:18:00,200
Are you on a particular time
of day? Mid-afternoon?
451
00:18:00,240 --> 00:18:01,360
Crane.
452
00:18:01,400 --> 00:18:02,400
Early evening?
453
00:18:02,440 --> 00:18:04,440
Possum.
454
00:18:04,480 --> 00:18:05,840
QUACK
OK.
455
00:18:05,880 --> 00:18:08,560
Right. So I can take the duck where
I want?
456
00:18:08,600 --> 00:18:10,240
If you want, yeah. Oh! Oh!
457
00:18:10,280 --> 00:18:12,360
I'm so sorry, I saw him.
LAUGHTER
458
00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:14,040
I saw him!
459
00:18:14,080 --> 00:18:16,400
QUACK
It's Mr Blobby!
460
00:18:16,440 --> 00:18:17,960
Pygmy jerboa.
461
00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:19,680
You're welcome to say hello
to Mr Blobby.
462
00:18:19,720 --> 00:18:22,000
Yeah, thank you. God!
463
00:18:22,040 --> 00:18:24,000
BBC, larger than a human
464
00:18:24,040 --> 00:18:26,480
but smaller than a large tree,
465
00:18:26,520 --> 00:18:28,800
walks on two legs.
DUCK QUACKS
466
00:18:31,600 --> 00:18:34,360
On BBC One?
LAUGHTER
467
00:18:36,120 --> 00:18:37,520
Pangolin.
468
00:18:42,320 --> 00:18:43,880
OK.
469
00:18:43,920 --> 00:18:46,080
What's on at that time?
470
00:18:46,120 --> 00:18:47,480
Mr Blobby?
471
00:18:47,520 --> 00:18:48,760
CHEERING
472
00:18:48,800 --> 00:18:51,760
Pink fairy armadillo.
473
00:18:51,800 --> 00:18:54,720
Yaaaaaay!
474
00:18:59,240 --> 00:19:02,240
I mean, the question I've got,
Nick, is that you asked every
475
00:19:02,280 --> 00:19:06,280
question about every subject ever...
Yes. ..before you arrived at Blobby.
476
00:19:06,320 --> 00:19:08,920
Yeah, that was, I mean, just
to do it by process of elimination.
477
00:19:08,960 --> 00:19:10,160
I guess that's what that was.
478
00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:11,840
By eliminating everything in
the world?
479
00:19:11,880 --> 00:19:14,440
In the world. In the universe.
Yeah, yeah.
480
00:19:14,480 --> 00:19:16,160
I like the question,
481
00:19:16,200 --> 00:19:18,760
"Are you smaller than a large tree?"
482
00:19:21,200 --> 00:19:23,640
Cos how tall's a tree? A tree can
be various sizes. Wow.
483
00:19:23,680 --> 00:19:27,480
I mean, one of the great
philosophical questions of our time.
484
00:19:27,520 --> 00:19:30,320
How large is large? How large
IS large?
485
00:19:30,360 --> 00:19:33,000
This is large.You're larger than
me, yeah.
LAUGHTER
486
00:19:33,040 --> 00:19:34,480
Small. Yeah.
487
00:19:35,880 --> 00:19:38,360
Was there a logic
to Sophie's questions?
488
00:19:40,320 --> 00:19:42,400
I've written some down.
489
00:19:42,440 --> 00:19:44,320
"Have I met you
in the last five years?"
490
00:19:46,160 --> 00:19:48,040
"Have I got drunk with you?"
491
00:19:48,080 --> 00:19:51,320
"Have you used an Excel sheet?"
492
00:19:52,400 --> 00:19:55,320
I mean, you literally sound like
a dropped Alexa.
493
00:19:57,440 --> 00:19:59,440
I just thought you were going to
do something
494
00:19:59,480 --> 00:20:02,160
a bit like Surprise Surprise.
I thought you were going to...
495
00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:05,720
I thought it could've been my mate
Amy, to be honest. Right.
496
00:20:05,760 --> 00:20:07,960
I was really thinking she was
going to pop out. Yeah.
497
00:20:08,000 --> 00:20:11,000
And that we'd mounted her on a
golf trolley? Yeah.
LAUGHTER
498
00:20:11,040 --> 00:20:13,000
Obviously, Sophie can't have
a point, can she?
499
00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:15,000
Cos she saw Blobby.
AUDIENCE: Aw!
500
00:20:15,040 --> 00:20:16,200
I know. Terrible, actually.
501
00:20:16,240 --> 00:20:18,360
Tough shit.
LAUGHTER
502
00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:19,880
Shall we give out the points? Yes.
503
00:20:19,920 --> 00:20:21,960
Well, it's Sophie, unfortunately,
zero.
504
00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:23,920
Two points to Nick, three to Steve,
four to John.
505
00:20:23,960 --> 00:20:25,520
But the winner, the future
Mrs Blobby,
506
00:20:25,560 --> 00:20:27,280
is Joanne McNally! Whoa!
507
00:20:27,320 --> 00:20:28,320
CHEERING
508
00:20:30,760 --> 00:20:32,480
May I see a scoreboard, please?
509
00:20:32,520 --> 00:20:34,760
At the bottom, and it's been typical
of the series so far,
510
00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:36,680
we've got Sophie and Nick with
three points.
511
00:20:36,720 --> 00:20:39,040
At the top, it's John
and Joanne, both with nine points.
512
00:20:44,000 --> 00:20:45,400
Good. What's next?
513
00:20:45,440 --> 00:20:46,920
Ooh! Oh, no.
514
00:20:46,960 --> 00:20:49,640
It's childcare.
AUDIENCE: Ooh!
515
00:20:51,480 --> 00:20:54,400
BABY CRIES
516
00:20:59,960 --> 00:21:03,360
Hi. Hi, and congratulations.
517
00:21:03,400 --> 00:21:05,840
Thank you. This takes me back.
518
00:21:06,960 --> 00:21:08,560
Have you worn one of them before?
519
00:21:08,600 --> 00:21:11,440
Well, in my head it's a bulletproof
vest.
520
00:21:11,480 --> 00:21:14,200
And I am Detective Robins, homicide.
521
00:21:14,240 --> 00:21:16,880
Oh, hi, Joanne. What's going on?
522
00:21:16,920 --> 00:21:18,320
You've got to look after a baby.
523
00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:21,400
What is it?
524
00:21:21,440 --> 00:21:24,520
I'll pop her or him in.
I can't remember the gender.
525
00:21:24,560 --> 00:21:25,720
Oh, God.
526
00:21:25,760 --> 00:21:27,440
Ah!
527
00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:30,280
There we go. Nothing to be
frightened of.
528
00:21:30,320 --> 00:21:32,600
This is actually quite comfortable.
Good.
529
00:21:32,640 --> 00:21:34,120
Nice on the shoulders.
530
00:21:35,280 --> 00:21:38,160
Complete the jobstacle course.
531
00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:42,200
Each job must completed to
a satisfactory-quality level.
532
00:21:42,240 --> 00:21:44,760
The baby must remain in
the baby carrier at all times
533
00:21:44,800 --> 00:21:47,600
except during nappy change.
Yes. Yes.
534
00:21:47,640 --> 00:21:49,640
You must complete the jobstacle
course
535
00:21:49,680 --> 00:21:51,200
within eight minutes.
536
00:21:51,240 --> 00:21:53,640
The least baby spilled wins.
537
00:21:53,680 --> 00:21:55,560
I'd actually like to spill
a bit of it.
538
00:21:56,920 --> 00:22:01,920
LAUGHTER
We want a wet baby and a dry Steve.
539
00:22:01,960 --> 00:22:03,800
Your time starts when Alex blows
his whistle.
540
00:22:03,840 --> 00:22:05,840
WHISTLE BLOWS
Oh, God.
541
00:22:08,040 --> 00:22:10,040
Nick looks terrified of the baby.
542
00:22:10,080 --> 00:22:12,200
I've got three kids!
Have you really got three kids?
543
00:22:12,240 --> 00:22:15,800
Yeah, genuinely. It's weird,
isn't it? Yeah, I have, yeah. It is!
544
00:22:15,840 --> 00:22:17,600
Sorry, kids.
545
00:22:19,040 --> 00:22:21,920
Let's crack on. All right, then.
The first to look after
546
00:22:21,960 --> 00:22:24,120
the big wet baby are
Joanne and Sophie.
547
00:22:25,200 --> 00:22:28,560
I think my approach is going to be
to glide.
548
00:22:28,600 --> 00:22:32,960
Swift, fast and smooth, like a swan.
Do the dishes.
549
00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:34,920
They're in the caravan.
550
00:22:34,960 --> 00:22:37,560
I am curious about motherhood,
so I think this'll be good for me.
551
00:22:37,600 --> 00:22:38,800
Yeah, this'll be a good test.
552
00:22:39,800 --> 00:22:41,120
Like a swan.
553
00:22:42,760 --> 00:22:45,880
Daddy Horne hanging
around outside doing fuck all.
554
00:22:45,920 --> 00:22:48,160
LAUGHTER
555
00:22:50,120 --> 00:22:51,440
That's it. Done.
556
00:22:52,440 --> 00:22:54,640
Oh! That was unfortunate.
557
00:22:56,360 --> 00:22:57,800
Ah, now.
558
00:22:57,840 --> 00:22:59,760
Alex, pick up the basket.
559
00:22:59,800 --> 00:23:00,960
I'll pick up the basket.
560
00:23:01,960 --> 00:23:03,720
And the thing... I can't pick up
the thing.
561
00:23:06,000 --> 00:23:07,320
Bend from the knees.
562
00:23:08,720 --> 00:23:09,920
Now.
563
00:23:13,440 --> 00:23:14,480
Oh, no.
564
00:23:16,000 --> 00:23:17,880
His shoes need cleaning now.
565
00:23:19,800 --> 00:23:21,640
Argh.
566
00:23:21,680 --> 00:23:23,600
The state of your shoes, Greg.
567
00:23:23,640 --> 00:23:26,720
I'm trying to raise a jug of water
here.
LAUGHTER
568
00:23:27,720 --> 00:23:31,880
There's a suffragette turning in her
grave somewhere.
LAUGHTER
569
00:23:31,920 --> 00:23:33,480
Oh, fabulous. Done.
570
00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:37,360
OK. Does your big wet baby have a
name?
571
00:23:37,400 --> 00:23:39,400
Juicy.
LAUGHTER
572
00:23:41,080 --> 00:23:42,160
Get in. Get in.
573
00:23:42,200 --> 00:23:43,640
This is why women breast-feed,
574
00:23:43,680 --> 00:23:45,120
cos this is a pain in the hole.
575
00:23:46,360 --> 00:23:48,440
Watch your own baby, yeah.
576
00:23:48,480 --> 00:23:51,120
Is the last one done? Yeah.
WHISTLE BLOWS
577
00:23:51,160 --> 00:23:53,920
Whack it in, whack it in.
WHISTLE BLOWS
578
00:23:53,960 --> 00:23:55,080
Thank you.
579
00:23:59,080 --> 00:24:02,080
I think it's very impressive, Joanne,
for you to make points about
580
00:24:02,120 --> 00:24:05,120
the patriarchy when you've got a
bucket of water strapped to you.
581
00:24:05,160 --> 00:24:06,360
Any excuse.
582
00:24:06,400 --> 00:24:09,440
Can you tell me statistics about
who was the most effective parent?
583
00:24:09,480 --> 00:24:11,920
Sophie spilt a fifth of her baby,
584
00:24:11,960 --> 00:24:14,600
used some of the baby to
clean the shoes with. Ah!
585
00:24:15,600 --> 00:24:18,000
I spilt some out at the start.
Yeah. Cos I was like,
586
00:24:18,040 --> 00:24:20,440
"That's going to go anyway.
I might as well get rid of it."
587
00:24:20,480 --> 00:24:23,280
Not stress it. Speed up. Yeah, you
only spilt a sixth of your baby,
588
00:24:23,320 --> 00:24:25,120
so you are currently in the lead,
Joanne.
589
00:24:25,160 --> 00:24:30,320
Next up, it's two dads of three -
it's Nick and it's Steve.
590
00:24:30,360 --> 00:24:32,800
OK, let's do the shoes first.
591
00:24:32,840 --> 00:24:35,240
Oh, God. Right, here we go.
592
00:24:35,280 --> 00:24:37,160
For... Oh, what am I going to clean
them with?
593
00:24:37,200 --> 00:24:39,480
Oh, I can't use the baby!
594
00:24:39,520 --> 00:24:40,800
Sorry, baby.
595
00:24:40,840 --> 00:24:42,760
Just... I'm patting the baby's head.
596
00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:45,480
Baby's fine, though. Argh!
Baby's fine.
597
00:24:45,520 --> 00:24:47,960
You're not cleaning with
the baby at all, are you?
598
00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:50,800
A little bit of her went in the...in
the soapy water.
599
00:24:50,840 --> 00:24:53,480
# With rings on her fingers
600
00:24:53,520 --> 00:24:56,080
# And bells on her toes... #
601
00:24:57,520 --> 00:25:00,080
Ooh.
LAUGHTER
602
00:25:00,120 --> 00:25:01,400
I think your baby's been sick.
603
00:25:01,440 --> 00:25:04,920
Hang the laundry twixt the cow
and the caravan.
604
00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:07,440
Bit of baby spilt on your knee, then.
Yeah, but that...
605
00:25:07,480 --> 00:25:09,640
A lot of... Oh. That's handy.
606
00:25:09,680 --> 00:25:12,760
I'm assuming I have to create my own
line, yeah?
607
00:25:12,800 --> 00:25:16,800
To hang the... Sure, yeah.
..laundry.
608
00:25:18,280 --> 00:25:20,080
# Ta-da-da-da. #
609
00:25:20,120 --> 00:25:23,160
There we go. Is that... Are you
satisfied with that? Well, yeah.
610
00:25:23,200 --> 00:25:26,320
Yeah? So, hang the laundry,
dust the carpet.
611
00:25:26,360 --> 00:25:30,120
Oh, was that dusting the carpet?
CACKLES
612
00:25:30,160 --> 00:25:32,720
OK, best way to dust a carpet...
613
00:25:35,040 --> 00:25:37,240
LAUGHTER
614
00:25:39,320 --> 00:25:40,680
Satisfied?
615
00:25:40,720 --> 00:25:41,720
No.
616
00:25:42,800 --> 00:25:44,840
Oh, baby's not happy with this.
617
00:25:46,280 --> 00:25:48,480
Are you...thirsty?
618
00:25:48,520 --> 00:25:51,280
Oh, there we go.
619
00:25:51,320 --> 00:25:53,440
Now let's get that nap-nap changed.
620
00:25:53,480 --> 00:25:54,480
Ugh.
621
00:25:56,320 --> 00:25:58,000
She loves that.
622
00:25:58,040 --> 00:26:00,040
WHISTLE BLOWS
There you go. That's not bad.
623
00:26:00,080 --> 00:26:01,400
You've got three seconds left.
624
00:26:01,440 --> 00:26:04,160
Uh... Love you.
WHISTLE BLOWS
625
00:26:09,480 --> 00:26:15,360
Two actual fathers. And with
very contrasting approaches.
626
00:26:15,400 --> 00:26:19,600
Nick, you seemed a very cautious
and caring parent, I thought. Yeah.
627
00:26:19,640 --> 00:26:21,320
Did Nick spill a lot of baby?
628
00:26:21,360 --> 00:26:23,520
Yes, Nick spilt a quarter of his
baby,
629
00:26:23,560 --> 00:26:26,160
whereas Steve, in the end,
only 7% of baby spilt.
630
00:26:26,200 --> 00:26:29,480
Who would've thought that you would
come across in this competition as
631
00:26:29,520 --> 00:26:32,000
a more effective parent by
force-feeding your baby?
632
00:26:33,040 --> 00:26:35,480
I feel like I have to apologise
to my own children now,
633
00:26:35,520 --> 00:26:37,560
if that was anything like
the upbringing they had.
634
00:26:37,600 --> 00:26:38,760
Yeah.
635
00:26:38,800 --> 00:26:41,680
Time for a break now. I say that,
it doesn't seem to matter
636
00:26:41,720 --> 00:26:45,840
how much pressure I apply
to Alex's pelvis, it just won't snap.
637
00:26:45,880 --> 00:26:48,240
LAUGHTER
638
00:27:00,040 --> 00:27:05,320
Hello. Yes, you're back with us on
Taskmaster. Mm-mm.
639
00:27:05,360 --> 00:27:07,320
Comedy entertainment at its finest.
Am I right, guys?
640
00:27:08,320 --> 00:27:10,640
The current task...
LAUGHTER
641
00:27:10,680 --> 00:27:13,760
..sees our comedians busy trying
to complete a jobstacle course
642
00:27:13,800 --> 00:27:16,200
of household chores whilst looking
after their water bottle in
643
00:27:16,240 --> 00:27:19,040
a baby carrier. Least baby spilled
wins.
644
00:27:19,080 --> 00:27:21,640
Last up - Rohn Jobins.
LAUGHTER
645
00:27:23,120 --> 00:27:24,680
What are you going to do first, John?
646
00:27:24,720 --> 00:27:26,600
Well, I'm going to take
the baby out of this.
647
00:27:26,640 --> 00:27:28,600
It must stay in the baby carrier.
648
00:27:28,640 --> 00:27:31,400
It must remain in the baby carrier.
649
00:27:31,440 --> 00:27:34,440
But the baby carrier doesn't have
to remain on me.
650
00:27:34,480 --> 00:27:36,400
AUDIENCE: Ooh!
651
00:27:39,400 --> 00:27:41,360
There we go. Right.
652
00:27:41,400 --> 00:27:44,440
LAUGHTER
Do the dishes. Caravan.
653
00:27:47,680 --> 00:27:49,680
Dishes...done!
654
00:27:51,680 --> 00:27:53,280
Thank you, Greg.
655
00:27:53,320 --> 00:27:54,920
Dust the carpet!
656
00:27:54,960 --> 00:27:56,080
Four minutes left.
657
00:27:56,120 --> 00:27:57,120
Four minutes!
658
00:27:58,400 --> 00:27:59,920
Never done this before.
659
00:28:01,000 --> 00:28:03,680
The way my life's going,
I'll probably never do it again.
660
00:28:03,720 --> 00:28:05,840
LAUGHTER
Ugh!
661
00:28:05,880 --> 00:28:07,720
A lot easier without
a baby on your front.
662
00:28:07,760 --> 00:28:09,160
Oh, it's so much easier,
663
00:28:09,200 --> 00:28:11,440
and honestly that baby's been
664
00:28:11,480 --> 00:28:14,240
driving me crazy.
LAUGHTER
665
00:28:14,280 --> 00:28:15,440
One minute left, John.
666
00:28:17,120 --> 00:28:19,040
Just taking a bit of care
with this, Alex.
667
00:28:19,080 --> 00:28:20,720
How much more time have I got?
668
00:28:20,760 --> 00:28:23,880
Five, four,
669
00:28:23,920 --> 00:28:28,000
three, two...
WHISTLE BLOWS
670
00:28:28,040 --> 00:28:30,120
Thank you.
671
00:28:32,720 --> 00:28:34,840
If anything, he was tad smug.
672
00:28:38,640 --> 00:28:41,640
But, you know. Fast, wasn't it?
Yeah, and it wasn't even about that.
673
00:28:41,680 --> 00:28:43,800
There was zero percentage of
the baby spilt.
674
00:28:45,400 --> 00:28:49,400
Oh, don't leave a silence where
there's a "but" coming and you...
675
00:28:49,440 --> 00:28:51,720
No? There's no "but". I'm just
allowing you to enjoy it.
676
00:28:51,760 --> 00:28:52,960
Oh, that's sweet.
677
00:28:53,000 --> 00:28:55,200
How long do you want to give him
to enjoy it?
678
00:28:55,240 --> 00:28:57,200
LAUGHTER
679
00:28:58,200 --> 00:29:00,120
We'll give him ten more seconds,
shall we?
680
00:29:04,120 --> 00:29:05,440
LAUGHTER
681
00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:08,400
No, I unfortunately
don't have another VT.
682
00:29:08,440 --> 00:29:09,720
He has genuinely nailed it.
683
00:29:09,760 --> 00:29:12,520
I know he has, yeah.
Which is very frustrating.
684
00:29:12,560 --> 00:29:13,840
APPLAUSE
685
00:29:15,480 --> 00:29:16,800
So the points are - Nick gets one,
686
00:29:16,840 --> 00:29:18,920
Sophie two, Joanne three,
Steve four,
687
00:29:18,960 --> 00:29:20,920
five points to John Robins!
Well done, John.
688
00:29:25,440 --> 00:29:26,960
OK, what's next please, Alex?
689
00:29:27,000 --> 00:29:29,480
You're going to like this, Greg.
We started off in a tent
690
00:29:29,520 --> 00:29:33,960
and now we're going to be IN TENTS.
Intense. Do you...? Yeah?
691
00:29:34,000 --> 00:29:37,560
AUDIENCE CHUCKLES
692
00:29:51,560 --> 00:29:53,480
Oh, hello.
693
00:30:00,320 --> 00:30:02,160
Hello, Alex.
694
00:30:02,200 --> 00:30:03,200
You all right?
695
00:30:04,840 --> 00:30:05,840
Oh, no.
696
00:30:07,240 --> 00:30:08,320
What now?
697
00:30:14,120 --> 00:30:15,280
Is this right?
698
00:30:19,560 --> 00:30:22,440
Hello, you OK?
699
00:30:22,480 --> 00:30:25,080
Have you seen something bad?
700
00:30:25,120 --> 00:30:26,240
Have you had an accident?
701
00:30:27,440 --> 00:30:29,440
ALEX GRUMBLES
702
00:30:31,680 --> 00:30:33,400
AUDIENCE: Aw.
703
00:30:36,200 --> 00:30:37,760
Hmm.
704
00:30:37,800 --> 00:30:38,800
Oh, thank you.
705
00:30:42,200 --> 00:30:46,440
Create tension and you've just
given me a masterclass.
706
00:30:46,480 --> 00:30:49,440
Create tension. Oh,
707
00:30:49,480 --> 00:30:52,760
you were acting.
And you did it well.
708
00:30:52,800 --> 00:30:54,960
Most tension created wins.
709
00:30:55,000 --> 00:30:57,760
You have 20 minutes -
your time starts now.
710
00:31:00,640 --> 00:31:01,960
Have you started the attempt?
711
00:31:02,000 --> 00:31:03,920
I've started. This is tension. Yeah.
712
00:31:08,640 --> 00:31:10,320
So, like, just make it
really awkward?
713
00:31:10,360 --> 00:31:12,640
What did you think
of my tension that I created?
714
00:31:12,680 --> 00:31:13,920
Didn't feel tense.
715
00:31:13,960 --> 00:31:15,000
No, no. Oh, well.
716
00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:16,840
I'd give it a two out of ten...
Right.
717
00:31:16,880 --> 00:31:17,880
..for tension.
718
00:31:17,920 --> 00:31:18,920
Sexual tension?
719
00:31:20,880 --> 00:31:26,200
Hmm, I'm going to need some kind
of elasticated roping.
720
00:31:26,240 --> 00:31:32,720
I would like to challenge you to
a duel of...
721
00:31:32,760 --> 00:31:33,800
..hangman.
722
00:31:37,680 --> 00:31:40,960
Isn't quite working, that, is it?
723
00:31:41,000 --> 00:31:43,560
Got a tablecloth? Mm-hm. Yeah.
724
00:31:43,600 --> 00:31:45,920
I'm going to get some bits and bobs.
725
00:31:47,320 --> 00:31:49,400
APPLAUSE
726
00:31:53,600 --> 00:31:57,000
This will be interesting cos
I know how to make you tense.
727
00:31:57,040 --> 00:31:59,040
Yes, you do.
728
00:31:59,080 --> 00:32:02,760
And I'm not going to be the
only one, I suspect. Let's go.
729
00:32:02,800 --> 00:32:05,680
First of all, we're going to see
three lots of tension-makers -
730
00:32:05,720 --> 00:32:07,560
Sophie, John and Joanne.
731
00:32:08,720 --> 00:32:11,400
Tension. What is tension?
732
00:32:11,440 --> 00:32:12,640
Tension is
733
00:32:12,680 --> 00:32:16,400
the apprehension that something
bad's going to happen, innit?
734
00:32:16,440 --> 00:32:17,880
It's tense, we're worried.
735
00:32:18,920 --> 00:32:20,120
Alex, sit with me.
736
00:32:22,240 --> 00:32:23,480
Sit down beside me. Yeah.
737
00:32:23,520 --> 00:32:25,960
Actually, no.
Actually hop up here, hop up.
738
00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:27,640
Facing you? Like this?
739
00:32:27,680 --> 00:32:29,920
This is perfect, yeah. Look at me.
740
00:32:29,960 --> 00:32:31,080
Do I relax? No, don't relax.
741
00:32:31,120 --> 00:32:32,400
No? I want you on edge.
742
00:32:33,640 --> 00:32:36,440
In order to actually
measure the tension,
743
00:32:36,480 --> 00:32:40,600
we've got both analogue
and digital tension scales.
744
00:32:44,920 --> 00:32:48,280
Like, so like...tightrope walking,
but on a chair?
745
00:32:48,320 --> 00:32:49,320
Yeah.
746
00:32:51,560 --> 00:32:54,680
What's your salary?
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
747
00:32:54,720 --> 00:32:56,280
Don't lie, don't lie to your mother.
748
00:33:01,720 --> 00:33:05,400
LAUGHTER
749
00:33:14,320 --> 00:33:16,360
Are you ready? Yeah, I'm ready.
750
00:33:16,400 --> 00:33:18,520
Increase the tension. Oh!
751
00:33:19,600 --> 00:33:22,240
Alex, stand firm.
Let's take a reading.
752
00:33:23,240 --> 00:33:25,080
Alex, that's ten kilos of tension.
753
00:33:28,280 --> 00:33:30,560
Our genitals are not touching,
just to be clear.
754
00:33:31,760 --> 00:33:32,760
Sadly.
755
00:33:39,040 --> 00:33:40,400
Can I say something?
756
00:33:40,440 --> 00:33:42,120
I don't feel the
need to say anything.
757
00:33:47,960 --> 00:33:49,040
Two minutes left.
758
00:33:51,400 --> 00:33:54,120
SHE HISSES
759
00:33:54,160 --> 00:33:55,160
That WAS tense.
760
00:33:55,200 --> 00:33:57,240
SHE HISSES
761
00:34:01,480 --> 00:34:02,680
Feels so good.
762
00:34:02,720 --> 00:34:05,200
It's like my father's alive again.
763
00:34:05,240 --> 00:34:08,080
Uh... It's my father's anniversary
today - dead 21 years.
764
00:34:08,120 --> 00:34:09,920
Oh, is it? You smell just like him.
765
00:34:10,960 --> 00:34:13,840
SNIFFS DEEPLY
766
00:34:13,880 --> 00:34:14,960
Hmm.
767
00:34:15,000 --> 00:34:17,320
What am I doing with the net, John?
What are you doing?
768
00:34:17,360 --> 00:34:19,560
You're catching the
Marble of Certain Death. Oh, I see.
769
00:34:19,600 --> 00:34:21,160
OK. OK.
770
00:34:21,200 --> 00:34:22,960
Three, two,
771
00:34:23,000 --> 00:34:24,080
one.
772
00:34:26,800 --> 00:34:28,160
And there you go,
773
00:34:28,200 --> 00:34:29,920
the Marble of Certain Death
caught by Alex
774
00:34:29,960 --> 00:34:33,480
under pretty extreme tension here.
That's ten kilos of tension.
775
00:34:33,520 --> 00:34:35,600
WHISTLE BLOWS
That's your time up, John. Thank you.
776
00:34:35,640 --> 00:34:36,640
Phew.
777
00:34:38,600 --> 00:34:40,960
Ten seconds, Joanne. My whistle's
right down here though.
778
00:34:41,000 --> 00:34:42,000
Excuse me?
779
00:34:42,040 --> 00:34:43,880
Ignore the whistle - it's just
me and you now.
780
00:34:43,920 --> 00:34:45,080
I've got to get the whistle.
781
00:34:45,120 --> 00:34:47,440
I've asked the cameramen to leave.
782
00:34:47,480 --> 00:34:49,480
SNIFFS DEEPLY
Stop it.
783
00:34:49,520 --> 00:34:52,360
WHISTLE BLOWS
Oh, thank God.
784
00:34:52,400 --> 00:34:54,320
Don't even look me in
the eye ever again.
785
00:34:54,360 --> 00:34:55,360
Thanks, Joanne.
786
00:34:59,920 --> 00:35:02,440
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
787
00:35:02,480 --> 00:35:04,280
I told you someone would
crack the code.
788
00:35:06,840 --> 00:35:09,360
Consent at every point -
every point, there was consent.
789
00:35:09,400 --> 00:35:11,280
There was.
What the audience didn't hear is
790
00:35:11,320 --> 00:35:12,440
what you said as you, uh,
791
00:35:12,480 --> 00:35:15,040
walked out which was,
"Never look at me again."
792
00:35:17,360 --> 00:35:20,040
Sophie, watching you
793
00:35:20,080 --> 00:35:23,240
standing on one leg with
a cup on your head
794
00:35:23,280 --> 00:35:25,840
hissing like a fucking snake...
795
00:35:25,880 --> 00:35:27,720
..is the least tense I've ever felt.
796
00:35:27,760 --> 00:35:28,760
Oh, really?
797
00:35:29,800 --> 00:35:31,520
You've never been in that position
798
00:35:31,560 --> 00:35:34,040
cos you're always taller,
aren't you? But... Yeah.
799
00:35:34,080 --> 00:35:36,200
..actually having somebody...
800
00:35:36,240 --> 00:35:38,560
HISSES
801
00:35:38,600 --> 00:35:40,640
Well, let me...
Let me, yeah, go on.
802
00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:42,560
If you sit on the floor.
803
00:35:47,160 --> 00:35:48,280
AUDIENCE MEMBER: Woo!
804
00:35:48,320 --> 00:35:50,160
HISSES FORCEFULLY
805
00:35:53,000 --> 00:35:54,920
No. Nothing? Right.
806
00:35:54,960 --> 00:35:56,160
Well, that's fine.
807
00:36:00,040 --> 00:36:02,640
What about John, who took
a very literal version of tension?
808
00:36:02,680 --> 00:36:04,320
Did he create much tension?
809
00:36:04,360 --> 00:36:07,040
Well, yes 1kg on Earth
810
00:36:07,080 --> 00:36:10,000
is 9.8 Newtons of tension,
we know this. "We know this."
811
00:36:10,040 --> 00:36:12,560
And you had ten kilos. So
it was, yeah, it was 98 Newtons
812
00:36:12,600 --> 00:36:14,920
of tension, he created.
Which is about the same as
813
00:36:14,960 --> 00:36:16,800
a small monkey swinging on a tree.
814
00:36:18,760 --> 00:36:20,640
How heavy is the monkey?
815
00:36:22,120 --> 00:36:23,640
It said a small monkey.
816
00:36:23,680 --> 00:36:26,840
How many pounds
of tension did he create?
817
00:36:26,880 --> 00:36:29,840
But te...tension's not measured in
818
00:36:29,880 --> 00:36:32,240
stones or pounds.
It's not measured in monkeys, mate.
819
00:36:32,280 --> 00:36:34,600
It's measured in...
LAUGHTER
820
00:36:34,640 --> 00:36:36,520
APPLAUSE
821
00:36:39,920 --> 00:36:41,080
Who's left?
822
00:36:41,120 --> 00:36:43,480
Next up, time to vamp up
the tension
823
00:36:43,520 --> 00:36:46,200
with Nick Mohammed. Ooh.
824
00:36:57,560 --> 00:36:59,160
How long, Alex?
825
00:36:59,200 --> 00:37:00,320
Got one minute, Nick.
826
00:37:05,000 --> 00:37:10,400
OPERATIC MUSIC BUILDS
827
00:37:19,120 --> 00:37:20,760
APPLAUSE
828
00:37:23,960 --> 00:37:25,400
That's what I intended.
829
00:37:25,440 --> 00:37:27,280
Then that then goes over that.
830
00:37:27,320 --> 00:37:29,000
We'll do that. And this little...
831
00:37:30,600 --> 00:37:31,600
..little finish.
832
00:37:40,680 --> 00:37:42,480
Thanks, Alex. See you later.
833
00:37:52,160 --> 00:37:54,680
The old egg-misses-the-glass
trick, eh?
834
00:37:54,720 --> 00:37:57,760
That was genuinely stressful just
rewatching that.
835
00:37:57,800 --> 00:37:59,160
Yeah, there was tension there.
836
00:37:59,200 --> 00:38:02,120
And I've gotta say, it's not looking
bad for you on this one. Oh, great.
837
00:38:02,160 --> 00:38:05,240
Yeah, and bear in mind who you're
sitting next to.
838
00:38:08,160 --> 00:38:10,160
Right, we're nearly at the end of
the show,
839
00:38:10,200 --> 00:38:12,640
when one of the comedians
will scream with delight
840
00:38:12,680 --> 00:38:15,200
as they head home
with their very own trough,
841
00:38:15,240 --> 00:38:18,320
but first, have some badverts.
842
00:38:27,920 --> 00:38:30,120
Hello, welcome back to the
final part of the show,
843
00:38:30,160 --> 00:38:32,160
where things have been
pretty damn tense.
844
00:38:32,200 --> 00:38:34,120
Oh, you've been pretty,
I've been tense
845
00:38:34,160 --> 00:38:37,440
and that's because we've come to
the end of our create-tension task,
846
00:38:37,480 --> 00:38:41,040
and it ends with me versus
Steve at hangman.
847
00:38:57,520 --> 00:38:58,720
No vowels.
848
00:39:04,520 --> 00:39:05,600
P.
849
00:39:07,400 --> 00:39:09,480
BELL DINGS
850
00:39:13,280 --> 00:39:14,360
T.
851
00:39:21,080 --> 00:39:22,680
R.
852
00:39:22,720 --> 00:39:24,840
BELL DINGS
853
00:39:28,320 --> 00:39:30,160
L.
854
00:39:30,200 --> 00:39:32,360
BELL DINGS
855
00:39:32,400 --> 00:39:34,880
D.
856
00:39:34,920 --> 00:39:36,920
H.
BELL DINGS
857
00:39:36,960 --> 00:39:39,720
M.
BELL DINGS
858
00:39:39,760 --> 00:39:41,520
S.
859
00:39:41,560 --> 00:39:42,680
N.
860
00:39:50,560 --> 00:39:52,640
P.
BELL DINGS
861
00:39:52,680 --> 00:39:54,280
C.
862
00:39:56,440 --> 00:39:57,640
B.
863
00:39:59,680 --> 00:40:00,960
H.
864
00:40:03,720 --> 00:40:04,720
C?
865
00:40:06,160 --> 00:40:07,160
G.
866
00:40:10,480 --> 00:40:12,920
V.
LAUGHTER
867
00:40:12,960 --> 00:40:14,960
BELL DINGS
868
00:40:17,800 --> 00:40:18,800
Nightclub.
869
00:40:36,920 --> 00:40:38,120
It means assistant.
870
00:40:40,920 --> 00:40:43,800
APPLAUSE
871
00:40:47,640 --> 00:40:49,400
What an impressive production.
872
00:40:49,440 --> 00:40:51,520
Hmm. Amazing.
873
00:40:51,560 --> 00:40:55,440
The tension in that room between
Alex and I,
874
00:40:55,480 --> 00:40:58,000
and the no-vowels hangman rule,
875
00:40:58,040 --> 00:41:00,160
that really upped it 50%.
876
00:41:00,200 --> 00:41:01,720
It did.
877
00:41:01,760 --> 00:41:02,920
It was electric.
878
00:41:04,320 --> 00:41:07,520
If I were to pick perhaps
a small criticism -
879
00:41:07,560 --> 00:41:09,720
yoghurt, cheese and hot sauce
sounds quite nice.
880
00:41:09,760 --> 00:41:11,760
LAUGHTER
881
00:41:11,800 --> 00:41:13,440
Right, Sophie's getting one point
882
00:41:13,480 --> 00:41:15,440
then there's a gulf between Sophie
883
00:41:15,480 --> 00:41:16,480
and the others.
884
00:41:16,520 --> 00:41:19,240
So we jump up to three points.
885
00:41:19,280 --> 00:41:21,400
Right. Who's getting three points?
John is.
886
00:41:21,440 --> 00:41:24,720
I felt tense
with Nick and with Steve.
887
00:41:24,760 --> 00:41:27,520
Steve, I felt deliberately tense.
888
00:41:27,560 --> 00:41:30,680
And with Nick, I felt his gross
incompetence was...
889
00:41:30,720 --> 00:41:33,080
LAUGHTER
..as a magician, was going to result
890
00:41:33,120 --> 00:41:34,800
in someone being hurt.
891
00:41:34,840 --> 00:41:37,360
So I can draw a parallel there
and say four points for both.
892
00:41:37,400 --> 00:41:40,120
But we all know where the most
tension was in the room. Yeah.
893
00:41:40,160 --> 00:41:43,080
And it was a grown woman sniffing
your beard.
894
00:41:44,400 --> 00:41:46,480
So five points to Joanne,
and that's the end of it.
895
00:41:50,520 --> 00:41:52,000
Scoreboard, boy.
896
00:41:52,040 --> 00:41:53,720
Right, OK. Well, unfortunately,
Sophie,
897
00:41:53,760 --> 00:41:55,840
that means you've only got
six points, whereas John
898
00:41:55,880 --> 00:41:58,480
and Joanne are in the lead
with 17 points. Ooh.
899
00:41:58,520 --> 00:41:59,920
AUDIENCE: Ooh!
900
00:41:59,960 --> 00:42:02,360
APPLAUSE
901
00:42:02,400 --> 00:42:04,080
All right, then.
902
00:42:04,120 --> 00:42:05,720
Please can you vacate your chairs,
903
00:42:05,760 --> 00:42:08,240
head to the stage for
the final task of the show!
904
00:42:18,320 --> 00:42:19,640
Who's going to read the task out?
905
00:42:19,680 --> 00:42:21,280
Joanne McNally, my friend.
906
00:42:22,640 --> 00:42:24,080
Don't look at me, Alex.
LAUGHTER
907
00:42:24,120 --> 00:42:25,240
Don't look at me.
908
00:42:25,280 --> 00:42:27,720
Catch the most monsters in
your boxes.
909
00:42:27,760 --> 00:42:30,440
The monsters must
propel themselves from the table.
910
00:42:30,480 --> 00:42:34,240
Most monsters in boxes after
two minutes wins.
911
00:42:34,280 --> 00:42:36,680
And I should also say - if you catch
one in your arm,
912
00:42:36,720 --> 00:42:38,280
that's worth one monster.
913
00:42:38,320 --> 00:42:40,520
In your hat, that's worth
two monsters.
914
00:42:40,560 --> 00:42:42,920
It's three on the leg,
915
00:42:42,960 --> 00:42:44,760
four on the back bucket,
916
00:42:44,800 --> 00:42:46,440
five on the shoulder.
917
00:42:46,480 --> 00:42:48,160
Isn't the leg one a bit unfair?
918
00:42:48,200 --> 00:42:50,600
Someone's got an advantage.
HISSES
919
00:42:54,520 --> 00:42:56,720
OK, so it's two minutes, Greg.
920
00:42:56,760 --> 00:42:59,320
Let's dance. And they're off.
921
00:42:59,360 --> 00:43:00,960
Whoa!
922
00:43:02,040 --> 00:43:04,360
It's hard to even get the... Oh!
923
00:43:04,400 --> 00:43:06,680
How'd you do it?
They're not bouncing.
924
00:43:07,720 --> 00:43:08,720
Oh!
925
00:43:11,440 --> 00:43:13,360
AUDIENCE: Oh!
926
00:43:15,440 --> 00:43:16,840
NOW I'm tense, Sophie.
927
00:43:29,880 --> 00:43:30,920
Yes, yes!
928
00:43:30,960 --> 00:43:33,160
CHEERING
929
00:43:34,280 --> 00:43:36,240
Nick is pulling away here.
930
00:43:38,520 --> 00:43:39,520
Ah!
931
00:43:39,560 --> 00:43:41,160
24 seconds left now.
932
00:43:41,200 --> 00:43:42,280
How are you over there?
933
00:43:42,320 --> 00:43:43,320
Yes.
934
00:43:44,560 --> 00:43:46,800
Oh, Steve, that was so close.
935
00:43:46,840 --> 00:43:48,320
Tip the table, tip that table.
936
00:43:50,320 --> 00:43:51,560
Oh.
937
00:43:51,600 --> 00:43:53,680
WHISTLE BLOWS
Stop.
938
00:43:53,720 --> 00:43:57,880
APPLAUSE
Oh!
939
00:43:57,920 --> 00:43:59,800
Can I clarify one thing?
It did say in the task
940
00:43:59,840 --> 00:44:02,160
the monsters must propel themselves
from the table.
941
00:44:02,200 --> 00:44:05,400
Are we happy that the stage is
a table for Sophie?
942
00:44:05,440 --> 00:44:07,240
I mean, as an act
of charity, I think...
943
00:44:07,280 --> 00:44:09,280
LAUGHTER
944
00:44:09,320 --> 00:44:11,360
OK, I'm going to quickly count
the monsters.
945
00:44:11,400 --> 00:44:14,920
We have one in the top -
that's two monsters for Joanne.
946
00:44:14,960 --> 00:44:16,840
Lovely. Not bad.
947
00:44:16,880 --> 00:44:17,920
We have one in the top,
948
00:44:17,960 --> 00:44:19,520
we also have two bucket monsters,
949
00:44:19,560 --> 00:44:22,160
so that's a total of ten monsters.
Ooh. Wow.
950
00:44:22,200 --> 00:44:23,440
That's a lot of monsters.
951
00:44:24,480 --> 00:44:25,720
You have two in the leg -
952
00:44:25,760 --> 00:44:26,960
that's six monsters.
953
00:44:27,000 --> 00:44:30,640
Right. Unfortunately, the arm is
the lowest scoring.
954
00:44:30,680 --> 00:44:33,560
There are six in there, which is
also a total of six monsters.
955
00:44:37,080 --> 00:44:39,600
There is one in the hat
and there are two in the bucket,
956
00:44:39,640 --> 00:44:41,680
so that's a total of ten monsters.
957
00:44:44,360 --> 00:44:46,120
So why don't you all come down here
958
00:44:46,160 --> 00:44:48,240
and we'll see what that's done
to the final scores?
959
00:44:48,280 --> 00:44:50,320
APPLAUSE
960
00:44:55,200 --> 00:44:57,120
Greg, I need to show you
a couple of things.
961
00:44:57,160 --> 00:44:58,840
Oh, good - is it related to the show?
962
00:44:58,880 --> 00:45:01,040
LAUGHTER
963
00:45:01,080 --> 00:45:03,800
Unfortunately, yes. I need to, uh,
get your judgment on
964
00:45:03,840 --> 00:45:06,160
a couple of little bits
I caught during the task.
965
00:45:06,200 --> 00:45:08,680
AUDIENCE OOHS
966
00:45:08,720 --> 00:45:10,280
Some impropriety?
967
00:45:10,320 --> 00:45:12,360
LAUGHTER
968
00:45:12,400 --> 00:45:15,880
You need them - otherwise, you can't
see. Oh, yeah.
969
00:45:15,920 --> 00:45:19,040
OK, have a look up here.
The first thing I was saw this.
970
00:45:21,200 --> 00:45:23,640
ALL: Ooh!
971
00:45:23,680 --> 00:45:25,080
Outrageous.
972
00:45:25,120 --> 00:45:27,840
Yeah, so do you want to dock him one
monster or more?
973
00:45:27,880 --> 00:45:30,160
Oh, I mean he's disqualified from
the whole...
974
00:45:30,200 --> 00:45:33,000
GASPS
I'm joking. I'm joking.
975
00:45:33,040 --> 00:45:35,560
Yeah, just dock him one point,
yeah. One monster's gone.
976
00:45:35,600 --> 00:45:38,080
And then it's whether or not
Steve's final hat monster
977
00:45:38,120 --> 00:45:39,640
was before or after the whistle.
978
00:45:41,480 --> 00:45:43,560
WHISTLE BLOWS
Stop.
979
00:45:45,560 --> 00:45:48,040
Well, it was about three
years after the whistle.
980
00:45:49,240 --> 00:45:52,560
So there's not a lot of tension
in that decision, is there?
981
00:45:52,600 --> 00:45:53,720
So that means Joanne, uh,
982
00:45:53,760 --> 00:45:56,240
is last with the two monsters,
then it's Nick with five,
983
00:45:56,280 --> 00:45:58,320
Sophie with six, Steve with eight
984
00:45:58,360 --> 00:46:01,120
and John takes all five points
with the ten monsters.
985
00:46:01,160 --> 00:46:02,560
There it is.
986
00:46:05,280 --> 00:46:07,480
Exciting what that's done to
the final scoreboard.
987
00:46:07,520 --> 00:46:09,480
Because so far only Steve has won,
of course.
988
00:46:09,520 --> 00:46:13,080
Correct. In this episode,
Joanne was pipped to the post.
989
00:46:13,120 --> 00:46:15,320
She got 18 points
and John got 22 points.
990
00:46:17,640 --> 00:46:20,480
John Robins is the winner
of episode three!
991
00:46:20,520 --> 00:46:23,080
Go and gather your
alternative animal accessories.
992
00:46:23,120 --> 00:46:25,680
APPLAUSE
993
00:46:27,320 --> 00:46:29,880
So what have we learnt from
today's show?
994
00:46:29,920 --> 00:46:31,480
Well, we've learnt that everyone
995
00:46:31,520 --> 00:46:33,960
finds themselves in tense situations.
996
00:46:34,000 --> 00:46:36,840
A difficult negotiation, perhaps,
a feud with a neighbour,
997
00:46:36,880 --> 00:46:38,600
an argument with a partner.
998
00:46:38,640 --> 00:46:42,800
But remember, there's always a way
to defuse that awful tension.
999
00:46:42,840 --> 00:46:44,040
And this is it.
1000
00:46:45,000 --> 00:46:47,360
HISSES
1001
00:46:50,800 --> 00:46:53,360
But there's only one real winner
tonight, ladies and gentlemen -
1002
00:46:53,400 --> 00:46:55,280
that is John Robins!
1003
00:47:17,720 --> 00:47:21,480
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