Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:11,846 --> 00:00:13,890
WELL, YOU FELL FOR THE OLD
2
00:00:13,914 --> 00:00:18,495
REMOTE-CONTROLLED-SELF-PROPELLED-
SPINNING-DOORKNOB TRICK.
3
00:00:18,519 --> 00:00:21,765
WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT BRANCH
OF KAOS DO YOU WORK FOR?
4
00:00:21,789 --> 00:00:24,668
TALK NOW OR YOU'LL
NEVER TALK AGAIN.
5
00:00:26,093 --> 00:00:28,972
I'LL TALK. MY NAME IS OTTO.
6
00:00:28,996 --> 00:00:30,740
I WORK FOR...
7
00:00:32,933 --> 00:00:34,399
HOLD IT A MINUTE.
8
00:00:39,039 --> 00:00:41,885
- HELLO.
- Chief: Max, this is
the Chief.
9
00:00:41,909 --> 00:00:46,022
LISTEN, CHIEF, COULD YOU CALL BACK
IN A FEW MINUTES? I'M A LITTLE BUSY.
10
00:00:46,046 --> 00:00:49,025
R-6 emergency. Get down
to the office immediately.
11
00:00:49,049 --> 00:00:51,394
- BUT CHIEF, I...
- I said R-6 emergency.
12
00:00:51,418 --> 00:00:53,630
Drop whatever you're doing
and get right down here.
13
00:00:53,654 --> 00:00:55,353
RIGHT, CHIEF.
14
00:01:06,200 --> 00:01:08,611
- YES?
- 99? The Chief.
15
00:01:08,635 --> 00:01:10,380
R-6 emergency.
Get to the office.
16
00:01:10,404 --> 00:01:12,382
OH, CHIEF, I CAN'T
RIGHT NOW, I...
17
00:01:12,406 --> 00:01:14,484
Right now. Don't waste a second.
18
00:01:14,508 --> 00:01:16,275
RIGHT, CHIEF.
19
00:01:19,846 --> 00:01:22,125
- HEY, WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
- I'M TERRIBLY SORRY,
20
00:01:22,149 --> 00:01:24,727
BUT I'M AFRAID YOU'RE GONNA HAVE
TO GET YOURSELF ANOTHER MODEL.
21
00:01:24,751 --> 00:01:27,032
I HAVEN'T FINISHED THE
ASSIGNMENT, THOUGH.
22
00:01:29,457 --> 00:01:31,656
I GUESS YOU'RE GONNA
HAVE TO GET INTO THE TUB.
23
00:01:33,660 --> 00:01:34,926
PLEASE, MOM.
24
00:01:38,732 --> 00:01:40,377
WHAT'S THIS ALL ABOUT, 99?
25
00:01:40,401 --> 00:01:41,911
WELL, I WAS
WORKING AS A MODEL...
26
00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:44,414
- A MODEL?
- YES, THAT'S MY COVER
THIS MONTH.
27
00:01:44,438 --> 00:01:47,050
AND THEN RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE
OF THE SITTING THE CHIEF CALLED.
28
00:01:47,074 --> 00:01:50,287
OH. WELL, I GUESS IT MUST
BE BIG. IT'S AN R-6 EMERGENCY.
29
00:01:50,311 --> 00:01:51,743
COME ON.
30
00:01:57,784 --> 00:02:00,685
ALL RIGHT, WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT
ARE YOU DOING IN THE CHIEF'S OFFICE?
31
00:03:06,219 --> 00:03:08,632
MAX, I THINK IT'S THE CHIEF.
32
00:03:08,656 --> 00:03:11,267
IF THAT'S THE CHIEF,
I'M ABRAHAM LINCOLN.
33
00:03:11,291 --> 00:03:12,435
MAX!
34
00:03:12,459 --> 00:03:14,704
FOUR SCORE AND
SEVEN YEARS AGO...
35
00:03:14,728 --> 00:03:16,739
ALL RIGHT, MAX, NOW LET'S
GET DOWN TO BUSINESS.
36
00:03:16,763 --> 00:03:19,264
THE REASON I CALLED YOU
BOTH DOWN HERE IS BECAUSE...
37
00:03:21,068 --> 00:03:22,879
MAX, WILL YOU
PLEASE STOP STARING?
38
00:03:22,903 --> 00:03:24,381
IT'S NOT THAT
CONSPICUOUS, IS IT?
39
00:03:24,405 --> 00:03:27,183
- OH, NO NO NO! NOT AT ALL CHIEF, NO.
- NO, NO NO!
40
00:03:27,207 --> 00:03:29,452
AS A MATTER OF FACT
IT'S A VERY HANDSOME RUG.
41
00:03:29,476 --> 00:03:32,122
- IT'S NOT A RUG.
- THAT'S WHAT I SAY, CHIEF.
42
00:03:32,146 --> 00:03:34,357
IT'S NOT A RUG. WHAT IS IT?
43
00:03:34,381 --> 00:03:36,793
IT'S A HAIRPIECE. IT
AUGMENTS MY HAIR.
44
00:03:36,817 --> 00:03:39,295
THAT'S WHAT I SAY, CHIEF.
IT AUGMENTS YOUR HAIR.
45
00:03:39,319 --> 00:03:40,963
NOW WILL YOU STOP STARING?
46
00:03:40,987 --> 00:03:43,766
WE'RE WAITING FOR YOU TO TELL
US WHY YOU CALLED US, CHIEF.
47
00:03:43,790 --> 00:03:46,591
NOW I ASKED YOU BOTH TO
COME DOWN HERE BECAUSE...
48
00:03:47,828 --> 00:03:50,373
THIS MORNING I
RECEIVED A PHONE CALL
49
00:03:50,397 --> 00:03:54,777
THAT MAY CHANGE THE DESTINY
OF OUR ENTIRE ORGANIZATION.
50
00:03:54,801 --> 00:03:58,481
"WEEK NEWS" MAGAZINE IS GOING
TO DO A FEATURE STORY ON US.
51
00:03:58,505 --> 00:04:00,750
"WEEK NEWS" MAGAZINE?
52
00:04:00,774 --> 00:04:03,920
THEY PICKED US OVER
EDDIE FISHER, HO CHI MINH,
53
00:04:03,944 --> 00:04:05,588
AND THE PRESIDENT'S GRANDSON.
54
00:04:05,612 --> 00:04:07,924
DO YOU THINK PUBLICITY IS
SUCH A GOOD IDEA, CHIEF?
55
00:04:07,948 --> 00:04:09,926
OF COURSE IT IS.
56
00:04:09,950 --> 00:04:11,894
THE CIA IS IN THE
NEWSPAPERS ALL THE TIME.
57
00:04:11,918 --> 00:04:14,397
AND THE FBI HAS ITS
OWN TELEVISION SHOW.
58
00:04:14,421 --> 00:04:17,833
WE'RE THE ONLY SECRET ORGANIZATION IN
THE WORLD THAT NOBODY EVER HEARD OF.
59
00:04:17,857 --> 00:04:21,037
NO PICTURES WILL BE USED
AND NO NAMES AT ANY TIME.
60
00:04:21,061 --> 00:04:23,606
I CANNOT IMPRESS UPON
YOU THE IMPORTANCE IF THIS.
61
00:04:23,630 --> 00:04:26,442
A FAVORABLE STORY CAN
MEAN RECOGNITION FOR US,
62
00:04:26,466 --> 00:04:29,145
IMPORTANCE, AND AN
INCREASED BUDGET.
63
00:04:29,169 --> 00:04:31,447
NOW THE IMAGE WE
WILL HAVE TO PRESENT
64
00:04:31,471 --> 00:04:34,683
HAS TO BE VIGOROUS, EFFICIENT...
65
00:04:34,707 --> 00:04:35,919
YOUNG.
66
00:04:35,943 --> 00:04:38,955
I GUESS THAT'S THE REASON
FOR THE RUG, HUH, CHIEF?
67
00:04:38,979 --> 00:04:41,324
I'VE HAD THIS A LONG TIME.
68
00:04:41,348 --> 00:04:43,793
I'VE JUST NOT HAD ANY
REASON TO USE IT BEFORE.
69
00:04:43,817 --> 00:04:47,063
WELL, WHAT DO YOU
WANT US TO DO, CHIEF?
70
00:04:47,087 --> 00:04:49,498
I DON'T KNOW YET. ALL I KNOW
IS THAT MR. FITZMAURICE...
71
00:04:49,522 --> 00:04:51,301
HE'S THE MAN WHO'LL
BE WRITING THE ARTICLE...
72
00:04:51,325 --> 00:04:53,602
ASKED THAT YOU BE HERE.
73
00:04:53,626 --> 00:04:56,505
- YES?
- Larrabee:
Mr. Fitzmaurice is here.
74
00:04:56,529 --> 00:04:59,309
OH, OF COURSE, LARRABEE.
SEND HIM RIGHT IN.
75
00:04:59,333 --> 00:05:02,946
HE'S HERE NOW. NOW, MAX,
TRY NOT TO GET IN HIS WAY.
76
00:05:02,970 --> 00:05:04,635
AND STOP STARING!
77
00:05:07,240 --> 00:05:09,360
THIS WAY, MR. FITZMAURICE.
78
00:05:11,711 --> 00:05:16,192
MY SECRETARY AND RESEARCH
ASSISTANT, MISS MAGRUDER.
79
00:05:16,216 --> 00:05:17,693
HOW DO YOU DO?
80
00:05:17,717 --> 00:05:19,595
AH...
81
00:05:19,619 --> 00:05:22,932
PANELED,
OLD-FASHIONED OFFICES...
82
00:05:22,956 --> 00:05:25,034
MR. FITZMAURICE,
THIS IS AGENT 99.
83
00:05:25,058 --> 00:05:28,337
YOUNG, RAVEN-TRESSED 99.
84
00:05:28,361 --> 00:05:30,573
AND THIS IS AGENT 86.
85
00:05:30,597 --> 00:05:34,165
BEADY-EYED, BLACK-HAIRED 86.
86
00:05:35,235 --> 00:05:36,680
AND I'M THE CHIEF.
87
00:05:36,704 --> 00:05:39,516
MIDDLE-AGED, UH...
88
00:05:39,540 --> 00:05:40,972
TOUPEED CHIEF.
89
00:05:43,444 --> 00:05:44,653
UH, WON'T YOU SIT DOWN, SIR?
90
00:05:44,677 --> 00:05:47,278
DEEP, COMFORTABLE COUCH.
91
00:05:48,882 --> 00:05:50,259
I'M AFRAID THERE ISN'T TIME.
92
00:05:50,283 --> 00:05:52,429
I'LL COME STRAIGHT TO THE POINT.
93
00:05:52,453 --> 00:05:54,531
IN ORDER TO MAKE
THIS STORY DIFFERENT,
94
00:05:54,555 --> 00:05:56,232
I DECIDED PERSONALLY
95
00:05:56,256 --> 00:05:58,568
TO ACCOMPANY A TEAM
OF CONTROL AGENTS
96
00:05:58,592 --> 00:06:00,203
WHILE THEY'RE WORKING ON THE JOB
97
00:06:00,227 --> 00:06:01,904
FROM START TO FINISH.
98
00:06:01,928 --> 00:06:04,507
I'VE STUDIED
HUNDREDS OF DOSSIERS
99
00:06:04,531 --> 00:06:08,132
AND I'VE DECIDED ON YOU TWO.
100
00:06:09,202 --> 00:06:11,013
WELL, WE'RE VERY HONORED.
101
00:06:11,037 --> 00:06:13,416
WELL, WE'LL SEE.
102
00:06:13,440 --> 00:06:16,852
AGENT 86, WE WILL MEET
AT YOUR APARTMENT
103
00:06:16,876 --> 00:06:18,687
AT PRECISELY 9:00
TOMORROW MORNING.
104
00:06:18,711 --> 00:06:21,457
ALL OF YOU WILL GIVE YOUR FULL
COOPERATION TO MISS MAGRUDER
105
00:06:21,481 --> 00:06:24,693
IN ACQUIRING ANY
BACKGROUND MATERIAL.
106
00:06:24,717 --> 00:06:27,931
I THANK YOU.
107
00:06:27,955 --> 00:06:29,387
MISS MAGRUDER.
108
00:06:33,593 --> 00:06:37,240
WELL MAX, IT LOOKS LIKE THE
FATE OF CONTROL IS IN YOUR HANDS.
109
00:06:37,264 --> 00:06:39,508
- ANY QUESTIONS?
- YES, CHIEF.
110
00:06:39,532 --> 00:06:42,979
ARE YOU SURE YOU HAVEN'T
GOT THAT THING ON BACKWARDS?
111
00:06:43,003 --> 00:06:44,680
GET OUT, MAX.
112
00:06:44,704 --> 00:06:46,738
"GET OUT." COME, ON, 99.
113
00:07:07,460 --> 00:07:08,938
YOU NOW HAVE IN
YOUR POSSESSION...
114
00:07:08,962 --> 00:07:12,041
AND I TRUST YOU HAVE ABSORBED...
115
00:07:12,065 --> 00:07:13,776
THE SCHEDULE OF MAXWELL SMART'S
116
00:07:13,800 --> 00:07:16,312
AND 99'S ACTIVITIES
FOR TOMORROW.
117
00:07:16,336 --> 00:07:20,016
IT SHOULD BE EASY TO ARRANGE AN
AMBUSH AND ELIMINATE THE TWO OF THEM.
118
00:07:20,040 --> 00:07:22,018
THAT'S EXACTLY
WHAT WE DO NOT WANT.
119
00:07:22,042 --> 00:07:23,819
WE'RE AFTER BIGGER GAME...
120
00:07:23,843 --> 00:07:27,290
TO ELIMINATE CONTROL.
121
00:07:27,314 --> 00:07:29,092
I DON'T UNDERSTAND.
122
00:07:29,116 --> 00:07:32,661
I SPENT TWO YEARS GAINING
MR. FITZMAURICE'S CONFIDENCE.
123
00:07:32,685 --> 00:07:36,900
IT WAS I WHO SUGGESTED HE DO
THIS FEATURE STORY ON CONTROL.
124
00:07:36,924 --> 00:07:38,902
IF WE CAN MAKE THEM
125
00:07:38,926 --> 00:07:41,871
AND THE ENTIRE CONTROL
ORGANIZATION LOOK FOOLISH,
126
00:07:41,895 --> 00:07:45,408
MR. FITZMAURICE WILL WRITE
THE KIND OF FEATURE ARTICLE
127
00:07:45,432 --> 00:07:49,545
THAT WILL PUT CONTROL
PERMANENTLY OUT OF BUSINESS.
128
00:07:49,569 --> 00:07:53,482
WITH MAXWELL SMART IN CHARGE,
WHAT OTHER KIND OF STORY CAN HE WRITE?
129
00:07:53,506 --> 00:07:56,519
WE CANNOT DEPEND ON
SMART'S NATURAL STUPIDITY.
130
00:07:56,543 --> 00:07:58,754
WE MUST HELP IT ALONG,
131
00:07:58,778 --> 00:08:00,523
ADD TO IT.
132
00:08:00,547 --> 00:08:03,192
BORIS, OTTO,
133
00:08:03,216 --> 00:08:06,396
AS OF THIS MOMENT WE COMMENCE
134
00:08:06,420 --> 00:08:10,188
"OPERATION RIDICULOUS."
135
00:08:18,966 --> 00:08:21,077
THIS DOESN'T SEEM LIKE A
VERY INTERESTING CASE...
136
00:08:21,101 --> 00:08:23,346
PROTECTING THE FOREIGN MINISTER
137
00:08:23,370 --> 00:08:25,315
OF A NEUTRAL COUNTRY FOR A DAY.
138
00:08:25,339 --> 00:08:28,184
YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.
KAOS WILL DO ANYTHING
139
00:08:28,208 --> 00:08:31,008
TO STOP THAT FOREIGN MINISTER FROM
MAKING THAT SPEECH TOMORROW MORNING.
140
00:08:43,090 --> 00:08:44,700
JUST A MOMENT.
141
00:08:44,724 --> 00:08:47,270
YOU ARE ABOUT TO SEE
YOUR FIRST DEMONSTRATION
142
00:08:47,294 --> 00:08:49,538
OF ONE OF CONTROL'S
UNIQUE SAFETY DEVICES.
143
00:08:49,562 --> 00:08:52,976
NOW THAT PIPE LOOKS LIKE
AN ORDINARY RAINSPOUT.
144
00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:56,312
BUT ACTUALLY WHAT HAPPENS IS
WHEN YOU TURN THIS LITTLE KNOB,
145
00:08:56,336 --> 00:08:58,814
IT BECOMES A PERISCOPE
WHICH GOES UP TO THE ROOF,
146
00:08:58,838 --> 00:09:02,751
ENABLING YOU TO HAVE A BIRD'S-EYE
VIEW OF THE ENTIRE NEIGHBORHOOD.
147
00:09:02,775 --> 00:09:04,920
- VERY IMPRESSIVE.
- WOULD YOU LIKE TO TAKE
A LOOK?
148
00:09:04,944 --> 00:09:07,245
OH, I SHOULD BE DELIGHTED.
149
00:09:13,420 --> 00:09:15,531
WHAT IN THE NAME OF...?!
150
00:09:15,555 --> 00:09:17,622
AGENT 86!
151
00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:29,712
WELL HERE WE ARE,
MR. FITZMAURICE.
152
00:09:29,736 --> 00:09:33,983
AN OPEN CAR? ISN'T
THAT A BIT CONSPICUOUS?
153
00:09:34,007 --> 00:09:37,854
THERE IS NOTHING AS
INCONSPICUOUS AS A CONSPICUOUS CAR.
154
00:09:37,878 --> 00:09:39,377
GET IN.
155
00:09:51,124 --> 00:09:54,737
IT MAY INTEREST YOU TO KNOW,
MR. FITZMAURICE, THAT THIS CAR IS EQUIPPED
156
00:09:54,761 --> 00:09:57,941
WITH EVERY PROTECTIVE
DEVICE KNOWN TO SCIENCE.
157
00:09:57,965 --> 00:10:01,477
FOR EXAMPLE, THIS LITTLE BUTTON
158
00:10:01,501 --> 00:10:05,403
ACTIVATES A .50 CALIBER
CANNON MACHINE-GUN.
159
00:10:10,444 --> 00:10:12,255
SORRY ABOUT THAT.
160
00:10:12,279 --> 00:10:15,491
NOW THIS LITTLE KNOB OVER HERE
161
00:10:15,515 --> 00:10:18,160
ACTIVATES THE EJECTOR SEAT.
162
00:10:23,023 --> 00:10:26,035
NOW THIS KNOB OVER HERE
163
00:10:26,059 --> 00:10:28,826
ACTIVATES THE SMOKE SCREEN.
164
00:10:32,499 --> 00:10:34,343
NOW THIS KNOB OVER HERE
165
00:10:34,367 --> 00:10:37,835
FIRES THE .50 CALIBER
MACHINE-GUN CANNON.
166
00:10:59,793 --> 00:11:01,137
Max: WELL, WE MADE IT.
167
00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:03,995
Fitzmaurice: WE CERTAINLY DID.
168
00:11:05,231 --> 00:11:07,276
MR. FITZMAURICE, WHAT HAPPENED?
169
00:11:07,300 --> 00:11:10,312
I MET WITH AN ACCIDENT... HIM!
170
00:11:10,336 --> 00:11:12,882
I HOPE YOU'RE NOT GONNA LET
THAT LITTLE INCIDENT IN THE CAR
171
00:11:12,906 --> 00:11:14,250
CHANGE YOUR OPINION OF ME.
172
00:11:14,274 --> 00:11:17,920
OH, IT DOESN'T CHANGE
IT. IT MERELY CONFIRMS IT.
173
00:11:17,944 --> 00:11:20,222
MAX, WE MET WITH
THE FOREIGN MINISTER
174
00:11:20,246 --> 00:11:21,924
AND HE'S WILLING TO
MEET WITH MR. FITZMAURICE.
175
00:11:21,948 --> 00:11:24,293
MISS MAGRUDER AND I ARE
GOING BACK TO THE CHIEF'S OFFICE
176
00:11:24,317 --> 00:11:26,195
TO GET SOME MORE
BACKGROUND INFORMATION.
177
00:11:26,219 --> 00:11:28,397
VERY WELL, 99. BUT
BE VERY CAREFUL.
178
00:11:28,421 --> 00:11:30,454
THE STREETS DON'T
SEEM SAFE TODAY.
179
00:11:34,527 --> 00:11:38,207
WELL, MR. FITZMAURICE, YOU
ARE ABOUT TO SEE FOR YOURSELF
180
00:11:38,231 --> 00:11:41,778
THE THOROUGH, EFFECTIVE
AND INGENIOUS METHODS
181
00:11:41,802 --> 00:11:45,148
BY WHICH CONTROL PROTECTS
THOSE WHO REPRESENT
182
00:11:45,172 --> 00:11:47,183
THE FORCES OF
GOODNESS AND NICENESS
183
00:11:47,207 --> 00:11:50,386
IN THEIR EVER-RECURRING
BATTLE AGAINST THE FORCES
184
00:11:50,410 --> 00:11:52,922
OF EVIL AND BADNESS.
185
00:11:52,946 --> 00:11:55,725
YOU CAN USE THAT SENTENCE
IN YOUR ARTICLE IF YOU LIKE.
186
00:11:55,749 --> 00:11:59,996
NOW AS YOU KNOW, THE FOREIGN
MINISTER IS HERE IN ROOM 822A.
187
00:12:00,020 --> 00:12:04,155
NOW THIS MAY LOOK LIKE AN
ORDINARY DOOR TO YOU, BUT OBSERVE.
188
00:12:07,260 --> 00:12:08,571
YOU OPEN THE DOOR.
189
00:12:08,595 --> 00:12:11,362
NOT THIS DOOR. THAT DOOR.
190
00:12:13,033 --> 00:12:14,665
CLEVER!
191
00:12:22,542 --> 00:12:24,821
FALSE ROOM 822,
192
00:12:24,845 --> 00:12:27,090
FALSE FOREIGN MINISTER,
193
00:12:27,114 --> 00:12:29,726
AND...
194
00:12:29,750 --> 00:12:31,682
FALSE WINDOW.
195
00:12:39,192 --> 00:12:41,503
FALSE CORRIDOR B,
196
00:12:41,527 --> 00:12:43,939
FALSE ELEVATOR NUMBER ONE,
197
00:12:43,963 --> 00:12:46,208
FALSE MAID...
198
00:12:46,232 --> 00:12:50,201
NOT BAD, LARRABEE, BUT I THINK YOU'D DO
A LOT BETTER IF YOU SHAVED YOUR ARMS.
199
00:12:51,470 --> 00:12:54,738
AND HERE WE HAVE FALSE ROOM 822.
200
00:13:02,181 --> 00:13:04,449
WELL!
201
00:13:11,357 --> 00:13:13,702
FALSE ROOM 822A,
202
00:13:13,726 --> 00:13:16,360
FALSE FOREIGN MINISTER B,
203
00:13:17,463 --> 00:13:19,697
AND FALSE WINDOW C.
204
00:13:26,406 --> 00:13:28,117
FALSE CORRIDOR C,
205
00:13:28,141 --> 00:13:30,252
FALSE ELEVATOR TWO,
206
00:13:30,276 --> 00:13:33,489
FALSE MAID B, FALSE ROOM 822B.
207
00:13:33,513 --> 00:13:35,391
ALL SEEMS VERY EFFECTIVE.
208
00:13:35,415 --> 00:13:37,493
YES. IT'S A LITTLE HARD
ON ROOM SERVICE, THOUGH.
209
00:13:37,517 --> 00:13:39,962
ARE THERE ANY REAL
ROOMS ON THIS FLOOR?
210
00:13:39,986 --> 00:13:42,698
NATURALLY NOT, BECAUSE, YOU
SEE, THIS IS A FALSE EIGHTH FLOOR.
211
00:13:42,722 --> 00:13:44,600
OH, THIS IS A FALSE
EIGHTH FLOOR?
212
00:13:44,624 --> 00:13:46,802
YES, THE REAL EIGHTH
FLOOR IS ON THE NINTH FLOOR.
213
00:13:46,826 --> 00:13:49,037
OH, THEN THE FLOOR BELOW
THIS IS THE SEVENTH FLOOR.
214
00:13:49,061 --> 00:13:51,507
NO, YOU SEE, WE DIDN'T
HAVE ROOM IN THIS BUILDING
215
00:13:51,531 --> 00:13:54,443
FOR THE SEVENTH FLOOR SO WE
PUT IT IN THE BUILDING NEXT DOOR.
216
00:13:54,467 --> 00:13:56,645
NOW THE BUILDING NEXT DOOR
HAS TWO SEVENTH FLOORS.
217
00:13:56,669 --> 00:13:59,482
- TWO SEVENTH FLOORS?
- YES, IT'S A VERY
INTERESTING THING TO KNOW
218
00:13:59,506 --> 00:14:01,883
IN CASE YOU EVER GO THERE,
WHICH YOU PROBABLY WON'T,
219
00:14:01,907 --> 00:14:04,386
BECAUSE THE BUILDING NEXT
DOOR IS A FALSE BUILDING.
220
00:14:04,410 --> 00:14:06,288
THE BUILDING NEXT
DOOR IS A FALSE BUILDING?
221
00:14:06,312 --> 00:14:10,058
YES. NOW YOU SEE, THIS IS
CONTROL'S OWN SPECIAL FLOOR.
222
00:14:10,082 --> 00:14:12,661
THERE'S ONLY ONE REAL ROOM
ON THE WHOLE FLOOR AND THIS IS IT.
223
00:14:12,685 --> 00:14:15,286
- FANTASTIC!
- HERE, COME ON.
224
00:14:20,860 --> 00:14:25,774
WELL, MR. FITZMAURICE, I HOPE YOU SEE HOW
BRILLIANTLY CONTROL PROTECTS ITS FRIENDS.
225
00:14:25,798 --> 00:14:27,709
FOREIGN MINISTER
UDANO, I'D LIKE YOU TO MEET
226
00:14:27,733 --> 00:14:29,478
MR. FITZMAURICE OF "WEEK NEWS."
227
00:14:29,502 --> 00:14:31,435
HOW DO YOU DO?
228
00:14:35,375 --> 00:14:37,886
ANOTHER FALSE FOREIGN MINISTER?
229
00:14:37,910 --> 00:14:40,211
Max: NO, A DEAD ONE.
230
00:14:45,184 --> 00:14:47,952
WAIT A MINUTE.
231
00:14:51,557 --> 00:14:54,036
THIS MAN ISN'T DEAD.
HE'S UNCONSCIOUS.
232
00:14:54,060 --> 00:14:56,220
AT LEAST HE'S LYING DOWN.
233
00:14:59,298 --> 00:15:01,844
IT'S OBVIOUS THAT
HE'S BEEN DRUGGED.
234
00:15:01,868 --> 00:15:04,412
WE'D BETTER GET HIM OVER TO
THE CONTROL LAB RIGHT AWAY.
235
00:15:04,436 --> 00:15:06,156
THEY'LL KNOW WHAT TO DO.
236
00:15:26,926 --> 00:15:30,206
WHAT'S THE MATTER? HAVEN'T YOU EVER
SEEN ARTIFICIAL RESPIRATION BEFORE?
237
00:15:35,869 --> 00:15:39,047
RATHER A STRANGE
PLACE FOR A LABORATORY.
238
00:15:39,071 --> 00:15:42,284
YES, IT'S ANOTHER ONE OF
CONTROL'S INGENIOUS HIDEOUTS.
239
00:15:42,308 --> 00:15:45,654
YOU SEE, OUR CHIEF SCIENTIST,
DR. STEELE, IS A CHORUS GIRL.
240
00:15:45,678 --> 00:15:47,289
OH.
241
00:15:47,313 --> 00:15:50,693
- WARDROBE TRUNK DOOR.
- OH, NATURALLY.
242
00:15:50,717 --> 00:15:54,697
DO YOU HAVE SUCH A THING AS A
"DOOR DOOR" IN THIS ORGANIZATION?
243
00:15:54,721 --> 00:15:56,621
YES, BUT IT'S A WINDOW.
244
00:16:02,361 --> 00:16:04,907
OOPS.
245
00:16:04,931 --> 00:16:07,342
- DR. STEELE,
ARE YOU DECENT?
- UH-HUH.
246
00:16:07,366 --> 00:16:10,045
HAVE TO BE CAREFUL. LAST
TIME I JUST WALKED RIGHT IN
247
00:16:10,069 --> 00:16:12,036
AND SHE WAS... YOU KNOW.
248
00:16:15,475 --> 00:16:17,186
DR. STEELE, HERE'S THE PATIENT.
249
00:16:17,210 --> 00:16:19,491
PUT HIM THERE, PLEASE.
250
00:16:22,615 --> 00:16:25,661
DR. STEELE, THIS IS MR. FITZMAURICE
OF "WEEK NEWS" MAGAZINE.
251
00:16:25,685 --> 00:16:28,163
- NICE TO MEET YOU.
- HOW DO YOU DO?
252
00:16:28,187 --> 00:16:32,601
MR. FITZMAURICE, DR. STEELE IS
ONE OF THE WORLD'S GREATEST
253
00:16:32,625 --> 00:16:35,537
EXPERTS IN THE FIELD
OF DRUGS AND POISONS.
254
00:16:35,561 --> 00:16:39,141
GRADUATE OF STANFORD,
SIX YEARS AT JOHNS HOPKINS,
255
00:16:39,165 --> 00:16:42,344
FOUR YEARS AT THE WINTHROP
INSTITUTE OF RESEARCH,
256
00:16:42,368 --> 00:16:46,115
AND TWO YEARS ON THE
ROAD WITH "HELLO, DOLLY!"
257
00:16:46,139 --> 00:16:47,649
WELL!
258
00:16:47,673 --> 00:16:49,618
HE'S OBVIOUSLY BEEN
UNDER THE INFLUENCE
259
00:16:49,642 --> 00:16:51,520
OF SOME POWERFUL DRUG.
260
00:16:51,544 --> 00:16:53,655
HE HAS TO MAKE A SPEECH
BEFORE THE JOINT SESSIONS
261
00:16:53,679 --> 00:16:56,024
OF CONGRESS TOMORROW.
WILL HE BE ALL RIGHT BY THEN?
262
00:16:56,048 --> 00:16:59,595
IF I CAN'T FIND AN
ANTIDOTE BY TOMORROW
263
00:16:59,619 --> 00:17:02,253
I'LL GO BACK TO THE
RADIO CITY ROCKETTES.
264
00:17:08,728 --> 00:17:12,641
BRING HIM IN HERE. EASY...
265
00:17:12,665 --> 00:17:15,511
- WHAT HAPPENED?
- WE WERE TALKING TO HIM
266
00:17:15,535 --> 00:17:17,012
AND HE JUST FELL
OVER AT HIS DESK.
267
00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:19,315
HE'S ALIVE, BUT WE CAN'T
SEEM TO WAKE HIM UP.
268
00:17:19,339 --> 00:17:21,379
PUT HIM OVER HERE, PLEASE.
269
00:17:27,012 --> 00:17:30,158
IS THIS A NORMAL DAY AT CONTROL?
270
00:17:30,182 --> 00:17:32,695
OH, NO. THE DAY HAS JUST BEGUN.
271
00:17:32,719 --> 00:17:36,131
UH, WHAT I MEAN IS,
DR. STEELE WILL HAVE THEM BOTH
272
00:17:36,155 --> 00:17:37,995
BACK ON THEIR FEET IN NO TIME.
273
00:17:39,091 --> 00:17:42,137
HE'S UNDER THE INFLUENCE
OF THE SAME KIND OF DRUG.
274
00:17:42,161 --> 00:17:44,706
I'D VENTURE TO GUESS
IT'S AKIN TO CURARE,
275
00:17:44,730 --> 00:17:46,610
ONLY NOT AS DEADLY.
276
00:17:47,500 --> 00:17:50,112
HOWEVER, I AM SURE
THAT I CAN FIND AN AN...
277
00:17:50,136 --> 00:17:52,414
TI...
278
00:17:52,438 --> 00:17:54,183
DOTE.
279
00:17:54,207 --> 00:17:56,786
DR. STEELE! DR. STEELE!
280
00:17:56,810 --> 00:18:00,121
I THINK I'VE SEEN ENOUGH
OF CONTROL IN ACTION.
281
00:18:00,145 --> 00:18:02,758
I'M READY TO WRITE
MY FEATURE ARTICLE.
282
00:18:02,782 --> 00:18:05,427
COME, MISS MAGRUDER.
283
00:18:05,451 --> 00:18:07,596
Max: ONE QUESTION,
MR. FITZMAURICE...
284
00:18:07,620 --> 00:18:09,654
WILL IT BE A FAVORABLE ARTICLE?
285
00:18:11,291 --> 00:18:13,558
IS HE PUTTING ME ON?
286
00:18:15,961 --> 00:18:18,262
COME, MISS MAGRUDER.
287
00:18:23,135 --> 00:18:26,982
ALL RIGHT. WELL, THANK YOU
ANYWAY, PROFESSOR STAMEN.
288
00:18:27,006 --> 00:18:29,418
IT'S NO USE, MAX. WITHOUT
A SAMPLE OF THE DRUG,
289
00:18:29,442 --> 00:18:31,753
PROFESSOR STAMEN CAN'T
MAKE AN ANTIDOTE FOR IT.
290
00:18:31,777 --> 00:18:34,190
AT THIS RATE THEY MAY BE
ASLEEP THREE OR FOUR MORE DAYS.
291
00:18:34,214 --> 00:18:35,924
MAX?
292
00:18:35,948 --> 00:18:37,693
MAX!
293
00:18:37,717 --> 00:18:39,595
DON'T EVER DO THAT, 99!
294
00:18:39,619 --> 00:18:42,097
MAX, YOU FRIGHTENED ME. I
THOUGHT THEY HAD GOTTEN YOU TOO.
295
00:18:42,121 --> 00:18:45,067
I WAS JUST THINKING. I ALWAYS
THINK WITH MY EYES SHUT.
296
00:18:45,091 --> 00:18:46,468
- DO YOU?
- YES.
297
00:18:46,492 --> 00:18:48,370
MAYBE THAT'S WHY I HAD
SO MUCH TROUBLE IN SCHOOL.
298
00:18:48,394 --> 00:18:50,105
I ALWAYS KNEW THE RIGHT ANSWERS
299
00:18:50,129 --> 00:18:52,374
- BUT I COULD NEVER SEE
WHERE TO WRITE THEM DOWN.
- OH, MAX.
300
00:18:52,398 --> 00:18:56,945
99, I KNOW WHO
THE KAOS AGENT IS.
301
00:18:56,969 --> 00:18:58,814
WHO, MAX, WHO?
302
00:18:58,838 --> 00:19:00,738
WOULD YOU BELIEVE...
303
00:19:02,241 --> 00:19:03,940
AH, COME IN, 86.
304
00:19:05,411 --> 00:19:07,389
WELL, HOW IS THE ARTICLE
COMING, MR. FITZMAURICE?
305
00:19:07,413 --> 00:19:09,224
OH, SPLENDID. SPLENDID.
306
00:19:09,248 --> 00:19:11,659
- YOU KNOW,
I'M ALMOST FINISHED.
- I'M GLAD TO HEAR THAT...
307
00:19:11,683 --> 00:19:13,629
BECAUSE YOU'RE UNDER ARREST!
308
00:19:13,653 --> 00:19:14,996
I BEG YOUR PARDON?
309
00:19:15,020 --> 00:19:16,765
IT'S REALLY QUITE SIMPLE.
310
00:19:16,789 --> 00:19:19,667
YOU'RE A KAOS AGENT AND YOU'RE
TRYING TO DESTROY CONTROL.
311
00:19:19,691 --> 00:19:21,537
MAX, YOU CAN'T MEAN THAT!
312
00:19:21,561 --> 00:19:23,973
KEEP OUT OF THIS, 99. I
KNOW WHAT I'M DOING.
313
00:19:23,997 --> 00:19:25,808
TAKE ALL THIS DOWN,
MISS MAGRUDER.
314
00:19:25,832 --> 00:19:28,310
I MIGHT WANT TO
CHANGE MY ARTICLE.
315
00:19:28,334 --> 00:19:30,345
I FEEL I'VE BEEN A BIT TOO KIND.
316
00:19:30,369 --> 00:19:33,015
SO YOU THINK I'M A
MEMBER OF KAOS, DO YOU?
317
00:19:33,039 --> 00:19:35,850
NOW HOW DID YOU LEAP
TO THAT CONCLUSION?
318
00:19:35,874 --> 00:19:38,253
IT'S AN OPEN-AND-SHUT CASE.
319
00:19:38,277 --> 00:19:40,188
YOU HAD ACCESS TO ALL OUR FILES.
320
00:19:40,212 --> 00:19:42,190
YOU WERE IN THE ROOM
WITH THE FOREIGN MINISTER
321
00:19:42,214 --> 00:19:44,559
AND YOU WERE IN THE
ROOM WITH DR. STEELE.
322
00:19:44,583 --> 00:19:46,561
AND HOW DO YOU
EXPLAIN ABOUT THE CHIEF?
323
00:19:46,585 --> 00:19:48,163
I WAS WITH YOU ALL DAY.
324
00:19:48,187 --> 00:19:51,900
OH, WELL, EVERY OPEN-AND-SHUT
CASE HAS ITS LOOPHOLE.
325
00:19:51,924 --> 00:19:54,736
UH, BUT I'M SURE THERE'S
A CONNECTION SOMEPLACE.
326
00:19:54,760 --> 00:19:57,972
MAX, THE ONLY TWO PEOPLE
WITH THE CHIEF THIS MORNING
327
00:19:57,996 --> 00:19:59,741
WERE MISS MAGRUDER AND I.
328
00:19:59,765 --> 00:20:04,346
OH. 99, HAVE YOU HAD A
SECURITY CHECK LATELY?
329
00:20:04,370 --> 00:20:06,014
MAX.
330
00:20:06,038 --> 00:20:08,850
AND MISS MAGRUDER AND I
MET WITH THE FOREIGN MINISTER.
331
00:20:08,874 --> 00:20:11,486
MISS MAGRUDER, MAY I
BORROW YOUR PENCIL?
332
00:20:11,510 --> 00:20:13,870
SOMETIMES IT'S GOOD TO GET
ALL THE FACTS DOWN ON PAPER.
333
00:20:17,183 --> 00:20:19,728
PLEASE, MISS MAGRUDER,
IT'S ONLY A PENCIL!
334
00:20:19,752 --> 00:20:22,130
MAX, THAT'S IT!
THAT'S HOW SHE DID IT!
335
00:20:22,154 --> 00:20:24,500
IT'S A POISON DART
PENCIL! PUT IT DOWN!
336
00:20:24,524 --> 00:20:26,134
WHAT IS THIS ALL ABOUT?
337
00:20:26,158 --> 00:20:28,670
MISS MAGRUDER USED THAT
PENCIL TO DRUG THE CHIEF
338
00:20:28,694 --> 00:20:30,538
AND DR. STEELE AND
THE FOREIGN MINISTER.
339
00:20:30,562 --> 00:20:33,942
OF COURSE, MAX SUSPECTED HER
ALL THE TIME BUT HE HAD NO PROOF.
340
00:20:33,966 --> 00:20:36,444
PRETENDING TO ARREST
YOU WAS JUST A CLEVER RUSE
341
00:20:36,468 --> 00:20:37,846
TO GET HER TO SHOW HER HAND.
342
00:20:37,870 --> 00:20:39,982
UH, YES, UH...
343
00:20:40,006 --> 00:20:42,017
UH, THAT'S EXACTLY
RIGHT, WHAT SHE SAID.
344
00:20:42,041 --> 00:20:44,786
YOU SEE, I SUSPECTED
MISS MAGRUDER ALL ALONG
345
00:20:44,810 --> 00:20:47,255
BUT I PRETENDED TO ARREST YOU...
346
00:20:47,279 --> 00:20:50,426
UH, BECAUSE THAT WAS
ONE OF THOSE CLEVER RUSES
347
00:20:50,450 --> 00:20:51,960
THAT SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT.
348
00:20:51,984 --> 00:20:54,618
ALL RIGHT, MISS
MAGRUDER, LET'S GO.
349
00:20:57,456 --> 00:21:01,270
- DROP YOUR GUNS.
- IS THIS ANOTHER ONE
OF MY CLEVER RUSES, 99?
350
00:21:01,294 --> 00:21:03,205
I'M AFRAID NOT, MAX.
351
00:21:03,229 --> 00:21:06,263
OH. IT WOULD HAVE
BEEN A GOOD ONE.
352
00:21:07,333 --> 00:21:09,444
WE'RE OUT IN THE OPEN NOW.
353
00:21:09,468 --> 00:21:11,947
OTTO, YOU'LL DISPOSE
OF THESE THREE
354
00:21:11,971 --> 00:21:15,050
WHERE THEIR BODIES WON'T BE
DISCOVERED FOR AT LEAST A WEEK.
355
00:21:15,074 --> 00:21:18,153
I'LL DELIVER THE ARTICLE
TO THE EDITOR PERSONALLY.
356
00:21:18,177 --> 00:21:21,156
HE'LL RECOGNIZE
YOUR INIMITABLE STYLE,
357
00:21:21,180 --> 00:21:24,959
MY DEAR, STUPID MR. FITZMAURICE.
358
00:21:24,983 --> 00:21:27,896
MISS MAGRUDER, YOU'VE
BEEN A WONDERFUL SECRETARY.
359
00:21:27,920 --> 00:21:30,732
BUT AS OF NOW CONSIDER
YOURSELF DISMISSED
360
00:21:30,756 --> 00:21:32,501
WITHOUT SEVERANCE PAY.
361
00:21:32,525 --> 00:21:35,825
LET'S GO.
362
00:21:43,235 --> 00:21:45,368
HOLD IT.
363
00:21:50,810 --> 00:21:52,688
GET IN.
364
00:21:52,712 --> 00:21:54,078
GET MAGRUDER!
365
00:23:00,313 --> 00:23:03,225
WELL, I HOPE YOU'VE CHANGED
YOUR MIND ABOUT US, MR. FITZMAURICE.
366
00:23:03,249 --> 00:23:04,926
I CERTAINLY HAVE.
367
00:23:04,950 --> 00:23:07,829
I WAS VERY IMPRESSED AT HOW
QUICKLY AND HOW EFFICIENTLY
368
00:23:07,853 --> 00:23:09,865
YOU ROUNDED UP
THAT ENTIRE GROUP.
369
00:23:09,889 --> 00:23:11,900
THE FOREIGN
MINISTER WILL BE ABLE
370
00:23:11,924 --> 00:23:13,868
TO MAKE HIS SPEECH RIGHT
ON TIME TOMORROW MORNING.
371
00:23:13,892 --> 00:23:15,770
ONCE PROFESSOR STAMEN
HAD A SAMPLE OF THE DRUG,
372
00:23:15,794 --> 00:23:17,538
HE WAS ABLE TO MAKE
AN ANTIDOTE FOR IT.
373
00:23:17,562 --> 00:23:19,774
I KNOW YOU WILL BE
PLEASED THAT I AM WRITING
374
00:23:19,798 --> 00:23:22,511
A VERY FAVORABLE
ARTICLE ABOUT CONTROL.
375
00:23:22,535 --> 00:23:26,881
PERHAPS IT SHOULD GO LIKE THIS:
376
00:23:26,905 --> 00:23:31,853
"EFFICIENT, EXPERT
CONTROL ONCE AGAIN FOILS
377
00:23:31,877 --> 00:23:35,957
NASTY, NOT-SO-NICE
KAOS DUE TO THE EFFORTS
378
00:23:35,981 --> 00:23:40,451
OF BRILLIANT, BRAVE AGENT 86.
379
00:23:41,654 --> 00:23:45,722
UH, NOT TO MENTION
NICE, NEAT 99.
380
00:23:47,926 --> 00:23:51,773
AND CAPABLE, COMPETENT CHIEF."
381
00:23:51,797 --> 00:23:53,608
YOU KNOW, CHIEF,
382
00:23:53,632 --> 00:23:55,644
THIS IS REALLY A PRETTY
WILD CONTRAPTION.
383
00:23:55,668 --> 00:23:58,413
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS TAKE THIS
ERASER OUT AND YOU'VE GOT A BLOWGUN.
384
00:23:58,437 --> 00:24:00,003
OW!
385
00:24:01,907 --> 00:24:04,819
WELL, MR. SMART,
386
00:24:04,843 --> 00:24:07,211
I'M AFRAID YOU'VE
MADE ANOTHER...
387
00:24:09,182 --> 00:24:10,792
MAX!
388
00:24:10,816 --> 00:24:13,562
NOW TAKE IT EASY, CHIEF.
LET'S LOOK AT IT THIS WAY...
389
00:24:13,586 --> 00:24:16,030
MAYBE AFTER A NICE
REFRESHING LITTLE NAP
390
00:24:16,054 --> 00:24:18,589
HE'LL FIND SOME MORE NICE
THINGS TO WRITE ABOUT US.
30019
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof