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1
00:00:20,988 --> 00:00:23,433
YOU DON'T KNOW
ME, I DON'T KNOW YOU.
2
00:00:23,457 --> 00:00:26,837
MAX, THE CHIEF HAS A VERY
DANGEROUS ASSIGNMENT FOR YOU.
3
00:00:26,861 --> 00:00:30,307
MAX? MAX? MAX!
4
00:00:30,331 --> 00:00:33,143
I BEG YOUR PARDON, MISS.
I DON'T BELIEVE WE'VE MET.
5
00:00:33,167 --> 00:00:35,245
MAX, I MEANT PRETEND
YOU DON'T KNOW ME
6
00:00:35,269 --> 00:00:37,180
AS FAR AS EVERYONE
ELSE IS CONCERNED.
7
00:00:37,204 --> 00:00:40,684
AND USE A NEWSPAPER. PEOPLE
CAN SEE YOUR LIPS MOVING.
8
00:00:42,877 --> 00:00:46,389
NOW LISTEN VERY CAREFULLY,
MAX. YOU MUST MEMORIZE THIS.
9
00:00:46,413 --> 00:00:48,925
KAOS HAS A SECRET
LAB IN THIS HOTEL.
10
00:00:48,949 --> 00:00:50,793
THEY'RE RECEIVING INFORMATION
11
00:00:50,817 --> 00:00:53,196
ABOUT THE NERVE GAS FORMULA
FROM BEHIND THE IRON CURTAIN.
12
00:00:53,220 --> 00:00:55,165
THE DEVICE USED FOR
RECEIVING THE INFORMATION
13
00:00:55,189 --> 00:00:58,035
IS A TINY AMPLIFIER BUILT
IN AN OLIVE WITH A PIMIENTO.
14
00:00:58,059 --> 00:01:00,437
A CONTROL DOUBLE
AGENT POSING AS A WAITER
15
00:01:00,461 --> 00:01:02,372
HAS STOLEN THE
OLIVE. NOW WITHOUT IT,
16
00:01:02,396 --> 00:01:05,341
WORK ON THE NERVE GAS WILL
COME TO A STOP. YOU GOT THAT?
17
00:01:05,365 --> 00:01:07,711
- NOT ALL OF IT.
- WHAT PART DIDN'T
YOU GET?
18
00:01:07,735 --> 00:01:09,968
THE PART AFTER "YOU
MUST MEMORIZE THIS."
19
00:01:11,038 --> 00:01:12,849
MAX.
20
00:01:12,873 --> 00:01:15,919
- WELL, WHAT DOES THIS
DOUBLE AGENT LOOK LIKE?
- I DON'T KNOW, MAX.
21
00:01:15,943 --> 00:01:17,821
YOU'LL HAVE TO TRY THE
PASSWORD ON EVERY WAITER
22
00:01:17,845 --> 00:01:20,523
- UNTIL YOU FIND HIM.
- WHAT'S THE PASSWORD?
23
00:01:20,547 --> 00:01:23,159
YOU SAY, "PUSSYCAT, PUSSYCAT,
WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?"
24
00:01:23,183 --> 00:01:26,062
AND HE'LL ANSWER, "I'VE BEEN
TO LONDON TO VISIT THE QUEEN."
25
00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:29,933
"PUSSYCAT, PUSSYCAT,
WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?"
26
00:01:29,957 --> 00:01:32,702
- RIGHT, MAX.
- LET ME GET THIS
STRAIGHT.
27
00:01:32,726 --> 00:01:35,471
I WALK UP TO EVERY
WAITER I SEE AND I SAY,
28
00:01:35,495 --> 00:01:37,841
"PUSSYCAT, PUSSYCAT,
WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?"
29
00:01:37,865 --> 00:01:39,275
THAT'S RIGHT, MAX.
30
00:01:39,299 --> 00:01:41,778
YOU'RE RIGHT. THIS IS A
DANGEROUS ASSIGNMENT.
31
00:01:41,802 --> 00:01:43,735
GOOD LUCK, MAX.
32
00:02:36,523 --> 00:02:40,670
LISTEN, BUD, I DON'T LIKE
PEOPLE TO LOOK AT ME FUNNY.
33
00:02:40,694 --> 00:02:42,806
WELL, IF YOU DON'T LIKE
THE WAY I'M LOOKING AT YOU,
34
00:02:42,830 --> 00:02:44,841
YOU'RE GONNA HATE
WHAT I'M GONNA SAY TO YOU.
35
00:02:44,865 --> 00:02:46,509
BESIDES, YOU DON'T
LOOK LIKE THE TYPE
36
00:02:46,533 --> 00:02:48,711
THAT WOULD GO TO
ENGLAND TO VISIT THE QUEEN.
37
00:02:48,735 --> 00:02:50,613
PUSSYCAT?
38
00:02:50,637 --> 00:02:52,849
PUSSYCAT, PUSSYCAT,
WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?
39
00:02:52,873 --> 00:02:54,818
I'VE BEEN TO LONDON
TO VISIT THE QUEEN.
40
00:02:54,842 --> 00:02:57,608
REALLY? WOULD YOU MIND
PUTTING ME DOWN NOW?
41
00:03:01,248 --> 00:03:02,892
HERE IT IS...
42
00:03:02,916 --> 00:03:05,862
WHEN YOU PUSH THE PIMIENTO
THIS WAY, IT BECOMES A RECEIVER.
43
00:03:05,886 --> 00:03:08,297
AND WHEN YOU PUSH THE OTHER
WAY, WHAT DOES IT BECOME?
44
00:03:08,321 --> 00:03:09,754
A PIMIENTO!
45
00:03:11,525 --> 00:03:14,570
NOW, BE VERY CAREFUL. IT'S
GOT A VERY LOUD SPEAKER IN IT.
46
00:03:14,594 --> 00:03:17,707
- YOU'VE DONE
A GOOD JOB, PUSSYCAT.
- WAIT!
47
00:03:17,731 --> 00:03:20,142
TELL THE CHIEF HE'S GOTTA
TAKE ME OFF THIS DUTY.
48
00:03:20,166 --> 00:03:22,545
I JUST CAN'T BE A
DOUBLE AGENT ANYMORE!
49
00:03:22,569 --> 00:03:24,314
MY NERVES CAN'T...
50
00:03:24,338 --> 00:03:25,748
TAKE IT.
51
00:03:25,772 --> 00:03:27,383
THERE THERE THERE NOW.
52
00:03:27,407 --> 00:03:30,252
TAKE IT EASY, NO
NEED TO GET ALL UPSET.
53
00:03:30,276 --> 00:03:32,288
BESIDES, I THINK I
FOUND YOUR TROUBLE.
54
00:03:32,312 --> 00:03:35,013
YOU'VE GOT A KNIFE ON YOUR BACK.
55
00:05:01,835 --> 00:05:04,647
ANNIE IS HERE, LOUD AND CLEAR!
56
00:05:04,671 --> 00:05:06,816
- HOWDY?
- IT'S VERY KIND
OF YOU
57
00:05:06,840 --> 00:05:08,818
TO GIVE US AN INTERVIEW DURING
YOUR LUNCH BREAK, MISS JONES.
58
00:05:08,842 --> 00:05:11,520
OH, FORGET THAT
"MISS JONES," BUSTER.
59
00:05:11,544 --> 00:05:14,423
I COME FROM A FAMILY
PART OF THE COUNTRY.
60
00:05:14,447 --> 00:05:16,826
TO YOU I AM ANNIE, OZARK ANNIE,
61
00:05:16,850 --> 00:05:19,863
LIKE I AM TO ANYONE
ELSE AMONG MY MILLIONS
62
00:05:19,887 --> 00:05:23,487
OF DEVOTED FOLLOWERS
AND FANS. PARK IT.
63
00:05:33,934 --> 00:05:36,112
HOLD IT! DON'T ANYBODY MOVE.
64
00:05:36,136 --> 00:05:38,882
SORRY, GANG, I DON'T USUALLY
BUST IN ON PEOPLE LIKE THIS
65
00:05:38,906 --> 00:05:40,616
AND SQUEEZE THEIR OLIVES,
66
00:05:40,640 --> 00:05:43,719
BUT THIS IS AN EMERGENCY.
67
00:05:43,743 --> 00:05:46,322
WHERE'S YOUR OLIVE? DON'T
TELL ME YOU SWALLOWED IT.
68
00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:48,557
I SWALLOWED IT.
69
00:05:48,581 --> 00:05:50,782
I ASKED YOU NOT TO TELL ME THAT.
70
00:05:52,519 --> 00:05:54,930
NOW, MY DEAR, THAT MAY HAVE BEEN
71
00:05:54,954 --> 00:05:57,800
THE COSTLIEST GULP IN THE
COURSE OF HUMAN HISTORY.
72
00:05:57,824 --> 00:05:59,569
WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT CRACK?
73
00:05:59,593 --> 00:06:02,838
I'M NOT AT LIBERTY TO SAY
WHAT I MEAN BY THAT CRACK.
74
00:06:02,862 --> 00:06:04,796
PARDON ME.
75
00:06:15,008 --> 00:06:17,520
HELLO, CHIEF?
76
00:06:17,544 --> 00:06:20,756
BOY, THERE ARE STRANGER ONES
IN THE CITY THAN IN THE COUNTRY.
77
00:06:20,780 --> 00:06:23,626
DON'T WORRY, CHIEF. I WON'T
LET HER OUT OF MY SIGHT.
78
00:06:23,650 --> 00:06:25,917
SHE'S LEAVING. I GOTTA GO.
79
00:06:42,102 --> 00:06:45,648
YOU FOOLS! DUMMKOPFS!
80
00:06:45,672 --> 00:06:49,386
SISSIES! YOU LET THE
CONTROL DOUBLE AGENT STEAL
81
00:06:49,410 --> 00:06:53,890
THE OLIVE RIGHT OUT FROM
UNDER YOUR STUPID NOSES?!
82
00:06:56,617 --> 00:07:00,329
THE MINUTE I GO AWAY,
EVERYTHING GOES KAPLOOT.
83
00:07:00,353 --> 00:07:02,599
BUT YOU WERE HERE ALL THE TIME.
84
00:07:02,623 --> 00:07:05,869
YOU'RE NOT MAKING IT ANY
EASIER ON YOURSELF, SHTARKER.
85
00:07:05,893 --> 00:07:08,405
IF X40 DOESN'T
GET THE OLIVE BACK,
86
00:07:08,429 --> 00:07:11,974
WE HAVE NO WAY OF RECEIVING
THE FINAL FORMULA FROM POPOVICH.
87
00:07:11,998 --> 00:07:13,743
BUT I THOUGHT THE
NERVE GAS WAS PERFECTED.
88
00:07:13,767 --> 00:07:16,212
WITHOUT THE FINAL FORMULA,
89
00:07:16,236 --> 00:07:18,948
WE CAN ONLY CONTROL THE
EMOTIONS OF THE FEMALE.
90
00:07:18,972 --> 00:07:22,418
- WHAT'S THAT?
- IT MUST BE X40
CALLING IN.
91
00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:25,288
WHO WILL HEAR ME
ON THIS FREQUENCY?
92
00:07:25,312 --> 00:07:27,523
OH, YOU'LL BE HEARD
ON X40'S WRISTWATCH,
93
00:07:27,547 --> 00:07:29,259
UND ON THE MISSING OLIVE.
94
00:07:29,283 --> 00:07:33,496
X40 BETTER BE CALLING IN TO SAY
THAT HE HAS RECOVERED THE OLIVE
95
00:07:33,520 --> 00:07:36,632
OR ELSE...
96
00:07:36,656 --> 00:07:40,456
YOU'D BETTER GIVE
IT TIME TO WARM UP.
97
00:07:41,027 --> 00:07:42,605
NOW IT'S READY.
98
00:07:42,629 --> 00:07:45,741
Siegfried: Hello?
99
00:07:45,765 --> 00:07:49,345
- HOWDY? Is that you, Siegfried?
100
00:07:49,369 --> 00:07:52,615
NO. IT'S ME, ANNIE.
101
00:07:52,639 --> 00:07:55,118
Siegfried: Where are you?
102
00:07:55,142 --> 00:07:57,074
WHERE ARE YOU?
103
00:08:03,283 --> 00:08:06,996
WHAT IS THIS? AM I
ON "CANDID CAMERA"?
104
00:08:07,020 --> 00:08:10,633
Siegfried: Answer
me! Where are you?
105
00:08:10,657 --> 00:08:12,802
I AIN'T TELLING YOU.
106
00:08:12,826 --> 00:08:15,471
YOU JUST GET OUT OF
HERE THE WAY YOU GOT IN!
107
00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:19,475
I've been hit. Control
agent 86 shot me.
108
00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:22,044
Siegfried: What happened
to the olive receiver?
109
00:08:22,068 --> 00:08:25,481
Without it, we cannot get
Popovich's 6:00 broadcast.
110
00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:27,872
Somebody swallowed it.
111
00:08:29,909 --> 00:08:32,622
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN THERE?
112
00:08:32,646 --> 00:08:34,857
GET OUT OF THERE!
113
00:08:34,881 --> 00:08:37,860
GET BACK HERE IMMEDIATELY!
114
00:08:37,884 --> 00:08:39,084
GOODBYE!
115
00:08:46,726 --> 00:08:48,737
PARDON ME, MISS, COULD I
SPEAK TO YOU FOR A MINUTE?
116
00:08:48,761 --> 00:08:50,406
- NO.
- GOOD.
117
00:08:50,430 --> 00:08:52,341
NOW LISTEN TO ME AND
LISTEN VERY CAREFULLY.
118
00:08:52,365 --> 00:08:54,677
YOUR LIFE IS IN GREAT DANGER.
119
00:08:54,701 --> 00:08:56,646
YOU'VE ACCIDENTALLY SWALLOWED
120
00:08:56,670 --> 00:09:00,216
A KAOS COMMUNICATIONS DEVICE.
121
00:09:00,240 --> 00:09:03,286
IF YOU'LL JUST PUT YOURSELF IN MY
HANDS, EVERYTHING WILL BE ALL RIGHT.
122
00:09:03,310 --> 00:09:06,055
- OH, SURE.
- NOW WAIT A MINUTE.
123
00:09:06,079 --> 00:09:09,013
I HAPPEN TO BE A SECRET AGENT.
124
00:09:15,521 --> 00:09:16,999
YOU'RE KIDDING.
125
00:09:17,023 --> 00:09:19,001
WHAT'S SO HARD TO
BELIEVE ABOUT THAT?
126
00:09:19,025 --> 00:09:21,871
WELL, FACE IT... YOU
AIN'T NO SEAN O'CONNERY.
127
00:09:21,895 --> 00:09:25,108
YOU KNOW, ALL HANDSOME
AND CONFIDENT...
128
00:09:25,132 --> 00:09:27,977
JUST TAKE A LOOK INTO
THE MIRROR, PUDDING.
129
00:09:28,001 --> 00:09:32,481
YES. WELL, I HAPPEN TO BE
VERY PROUD OF THIS DISGUISE.
130
00:09:32,505 --> 00:09:33,983
DISGUISE?
131
00:09:34,007 --> 00:09:36,653
ACTUALLY, I'M A
POWERFULLY-BUILT,
132
00:09:36,677 --> 00:09:39,856
HANDSOME BLOND GIANT
WITH SUNBURNED SKIN,
133
00:09:39,880 --> 00:09:42,692
WIDE-SET EYES AND
A DIMPLE IN MY CHIN.
134
00:09:42,716 --> 00:09:45,327
- LET ME SEE.
- WELL, THAT WOULD
TAKE HOURS.
135
00:09:45,351 --> 00:09:47,763
RIGHT NOW, YOU'RE TO COME
TO MY APARTMENT WITH ME.
136
00:09:47,787 --> 00:09:52,168
UH-HUH. I THINK I'LL TAKE
MY CHANCES WITH THAT, UH...
137
00:09:52,192 --> 00:09:55,304
- KAOS BUNCH.
- Siegfried to X40.
138
00:09:55,328 --> 00:09:58,007
Find out who has
swallowed the olive,
139
00:09:58,031 --> 00:10:01,577
and cut it out of them!
140
00:10:01,601 --> 00:10:04,903
RECKON I'LL TAKE MY
CHANCES WITH YOU.
141
00:10:22,088 --> 00:10:24,066
HEY, YOU KNOW, I
AIN'T NEVER BEEN
142
00:10:24,090 --> 00:10:26,035
IN A REAL SPY'S
APARTMENT BEFORE.
143
00:10:26,059 --> 00:10:29,493
Max: I BROUGHT YOU HERE
TO BE SURE YOU'RE SAFE.
144
00:10:53,519 --> 00:10:57,566
HEY, YOU'RE MIGHTY RUGGED!
145
00:10:57,590 --> 00:11:00,636
COME ON, TURN INTO
THAT HANDSOME FELLA
146
00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:02,471
WITH THE DIMPLES.
147
00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:04,428
SHH!
148
00:11:13,106 --> 00:11:15,351
OKAY.
149
00:11:15,375 --> 00:11:19,355
BOY, I BET EVERYTHING IN HERE
LOOKS DIFFERENT FROM WHAT IT IS...
150
00:11:19,379 --> 00:11:21,323
LIKE YOU.
151
00:11:21,347 --> 00:11:23,092
THAT'S RIGHT.
152
00:11:23,116 --> 00:11:25,027
FOR EXAMPLE, TAKE THIS VASE...
153
00:11:25,051 --> 00:11:28,291
NOW, USE THIS IF YOU WANNA HIT
SOMEONE WHO'S STANDING BEHIND YOU.
154
00:11:28,822 --> 00:11:31,288
YOU'RE PULLING MY LARIAT.
155
00:11:33,493 --> 00:11:35,137
GO AHEAD, TRY IT.
156
00:11:35,161 --> 00:11:38,195
HMM, OKAY.
157
00:12:00,520 --> 00:12:04,333
YOU KNEW HE WAS THERE
ALL THE TIME, DIDN'T YOU?
158
00:12:04,357 --> 00:12:06,301
AND YOU JUST WANTED
ME TO HAVE THE PLEASURE
159
00:12:06,325 --> 00:12:08,737
OF DOING IT ALL BY MYSELF.
160
00:12:08,761 --> 00:12:10,795
OH, I LIKE YOU, PUDDING.
161
00:12:12,565 --> 00:12:15,800
YOU GOTTA STAY
LOOKING LIKE THIS, HUH?
162
00:12:17,003 --> 00:12:18,414
YES, I'M AFRAID SO.
163
00:12:18,438 --> 00:12:21,050
NOW HERE'S SOMETHING
THAT MIGHT INTEREST YOU...
164
00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:22,684
AN INVISIBLE WALL.
165
00:12:22,708 --> 00:12:24,920
AN INVISIBLE WALL?!
166
00:12:24,944 --> 00:12:26,810
BOY, WOULD I LIKE TO SEE THAT!
167
00:12:28,748 --> 00:12:30,693
NO, YOU SEE, YOU PRESS THIS,
168
00:12:30,717 --> 00:12:33,629
AND AN INVISIBLE WALL COMES
DOWN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROOM.
169
00:12:33,653 --> 00:12:36,699
- "WHAR"?
- OH, "THAR."
170
00:12:36,723 --> 00:12:38,834
UH, WELL, YOU
CAN'T REALLY SEE IT,
171
00:12:38,858 --> 00:12:40,469
BUT IT'S RIGHT
OVER "THAR"... THERE.
172
00:12:40,493 --> 00:12:43,406
UH, THERE... "THAR." IT'S IN
THE MIDDLE OF THE ROOM.
173
00:12:43,430 --> 00:12:46,375
IT'LL EVEN STOP A
BULLET. WANNA TRY?
174
00:12:46,399 --> 00:12:48,276
SURE. WHERE...
WHERE SHOULD I AIM?
175
00:12:48,300 --> 00:12:51,413
- OH, JUST ANYWHERE.
- OKAY.
176
00:12:58,511 --> 00:13:02,858
YOU'VE DONE IT
AGAIN! YOU ARE CUTE!
177
00:13:02,882 --> 00:13:05,082
EXCUSE ME.
178
00:13:19,799 --> 00:13:22,277
VERY BAD JOB OF ENGINEERING...
179
00:13:22,301 --> 00:13:25,280
THIS IS THE CONTROL
FOR THE INVISIBLE WALL.
180
00:13:25,304 --> 00:13:28,116
THIS IS THE REMOTE CONTROL
FOR MY TELEVISION SET.
181
00:13:28,140 --> 00:13:31,676
THERE, THE WALL IS DOWN NOW.
182
00:13:38,785 --> 00:13:41,665
WOULD YOU MIND
PRESSING THAT BUTTON?
183
00:13:51,298 --> 00:13:54,310
HELLO? OH, HI THERE, CHIEF.
184
00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:56,345
UH, YES, I HAVE THE OLIVE.
185
00:13:56,369 --> 00:13:59,315
UH, WELL, THERE'S ONE
LITTLE COMPLICATION, CHIEF.
186
00:13:59,339 --> 00:14:01,517
IT'S INSIDE THE GIRL.
187
00:14:01,541 --> 00:14:04,653
YES, YOU'D BETTER
SEND OVER A DOCTOR.
188
00:14:04,677 --> 00:14:07,145
DR. McTAVISH. RIGHT, CHIEF.
189
00:14:09,382 --> 00:14:11,593
WELL, WE GOT A
LITTLE WHILE TO KILL.
190
00:14:11,617 --> 00:14:14,463
OH, UH, SURE IT SEEMS A SHAME
191
00:14:14,487 --> 00:14:17,866
TO JUST STAY AROUND HERE
DOING NOTHING TILL THEN.
192
00:14:17,890 --> 00:14:20,169
YES, IT CERTAINLY DOES.
193
00:14:20,193 --> 00:14:22,637
UH, YOU WANNA DO SOMETHING?
194
00:14:22,661 --> 00:14:25,207
YOU GOT SOMETHING IN MIND?
195
00:14:25,231 --> 00:14:27,831
AS A MATTER OF FACT, I DO.
196
00:14:28,901 --> 00:14:31,380
- FOR THE BOTH OF US?
- WELL,
197
00:14:31,404 --> 00:14:34,984
WHAT I HAVE IN MIND WOULDN'T
BE ANY FUN FOR JUST ONE.
198
00:14:38,578 --> 00:14:41,023
WOULD YOU LIKE TO SIT
DOWN ON THE COUCH?
199
00:14:41,047 --> 00:14:43,847
SURE.
200
00:14:56,195 --> 00:14:57,740
- COMFY?
- MM-HMM.
201
00:14:57,764 --> 00:15:00,676
SURE AM, PUDDING.
202
00:15:00,700 --> 00:15:05,035
OKAY, YOU WANNA DEAL OR SHALL I?
203
00:15:12,011 --> 00:15:15,357
THAT IS GIN-GEE-BOO.
204
00:15:15,381 --> 00:15:18,227
UH, THAT MUST BE THE DOCTOR.
205
00:15:18,251 --> 00:15:20,784
REMEMBER, YOU OWE ME 30¢.
206
00:15:30,463 --> 00:15:33,042
DOCTOR? - JA.
207
00:15:33,066 --> 00:15:36,412
- DR. McTAVISH?
- HOOT MON.
208
00:15:36,436 --> 00:15:38,414
WHERE IS THE WEE
LASSIE WITH THE OLIVE
209
00:15:38,438 --> 00:15:40,082
IN HER STOMACH?
210
00:15:40,106 --> 00:15:42,084
JUST A MINUTE, DOCTOR.
211
00:15:42,108 --> 00:15:44,086
THAT'S A VERY STRANGE
ACCENT YOU'VE GOT THERE.
212
00:15:44,110 --> 00:15:46,388
- YOU NOTICED?
- I CERTAINLY DID.
213
00:15:46,412 --> 00:15:49,591
VERY PERCEPTIVE. I
WAS BORN IN EDINBURGH,
214
00:15:49,615 --> 00:15:52,561
- BUT I STUDIED
IN HEIDELBERG.
- OH.
215
00:15:52,585 --> 00:15:55,719
WELL, THAT EXPLAINS IT. THE
PATIENT'S RIGHT OVER THERE, DOC.
216
00:15:59,992 --> 00:16:03,172
- OPEN WIDE,
PLEASE.
- AH-HH.
217
00:16:03,196 --> 00:16:06,875
AH, JUST AS I THOUGHT. WE
HAVE TO GET YOU TO A HOSPITAL.
218
00:16:06,899 --> 00:16:08,877
I HAVE AN AMBULANCE DOWNSTAIRS.
219
00:16:08,901 --> 00:16:11,202
JUST A MINUTE.
220
00:16:14,474 --> 00:16:16,585
VERY CLEVER,
221
00:16:16,609 --> 00:16:18,587
SIEGFRIED "McTAVISH."
222
00:16:18,611 --> 00:16:21,490
HOW DID YOU KNOW
I WASN'T A DOCTOR?
223
00:16:21,514 --> 00:16:23,825
VERY SIMPLE... YOU WENT
RIGHT TO THE PATIENT
224
00:16:23,849 --> 00:16:26,617
WITHOUT EVEN COMPLAINING
ABOUT HAVING TO MAKE A HOUSE CALL.
225
00:16:28,621 --> 00:16:30,754
YOU CAN CLOSE YOUR
MOUTH NOW, ANNIE.
226
00:16:31,857 --> 00:16:34,569
THANKS.
227
00:16:34,593 --> 00:16:37,439
ALL RIGHT, SMART, YOU CAN
PUT YOUR GUN AWAY NOW.
228
00:16:37,463 --> 00:16:41,899
IT'S NO USE. MY MEN ARE ALL
AROUND YOU IN THIS ROOM.
229
00:16:44,837 --> 00:16:46,548
ALL RIGHT.
230
00:16:46,572 --> 00:16:49,184
GOETHE, HANS, GODZILLA,
231
00:16:55,047 --> 00:16:57,648
UH... FELLOWS?
232
00:16:58,717 --> 00:17:00,729
OH, BOY.
233
00:17:00,753 --> 00:17:03,532
SORRY, SIEGFRIED, BUT
WE'VE ALREADY EXTERMINATED
234
00:17:03,556 --> 00:17:05,967
THE RATS THAT YOU
INFESTED THIS PLACE WITH.
235
00:17:05,991 --> 00:17:08,091
THAT'S TELLING HIM, PUDDING.
236
00:17:23,275 --> 00:17:25,654
NOW, THAT WASN'T VERY...
237
00:17:25,678 --> 00:17:29,413
I'M SORRY ABOUT THAT, PUDDING.
238
00:17:30,483 --> 00:17:32,294
THANK YOU, MY DEAR.
239
00:17:32,318 --> 00:17:36,932
IT WILL TOUCHING HAVING
TO KILL YOU AFTER THIS FAVOR,
240
00:17:36,956 --> 00:17:41,336
BUT FIRST... GOODBYE,
MAXWELL SMART!
241
00:17:52,571 --> 00:17:55,139
I SHALL RETURN, SMART.
242
00:18:02,715 --> 00:18:05,861
WOULD YOU MIND PUSHING
THAT BUTTON AGAIN?
243
00:18:05,885 --> 00:18:08,530
- I THINK WE'D BETTER
GET BACK TO CONTROL.
- YEAH.
244
00:18:08,554 --> 00:18:10,832
YOU'LL BE SAFE THERE.
245
00:18:17,696 --> 00:18:20,142
JA, ACCORDING TO SCHEDULE,
246
00:18:20,166 --> 00:18:21,966
HE'S COMING UP THE BACK WAY.
247
00:18:24,670 --> 00:18:26,715
SHTARKER, SMART DOES NOT REALIZE
248
00:18:26,739 --> 00:18:28,917
I HAVE THE REMOTE
CONTROL ACTIVATOR
249
00:18:28,941 --> 00:18:30,852
FOR THE EJECTION
SEAT OF HIS CAR.
250
00:18:32,611 --> 00:18:34,278
GET READY.
251
00:18:42,755 --> 00:18:44,688
BOARD, OUT!
252
00:19:01,340 --> 00:19:04,420
CONTROL INTELLIGENCE REPORTS THAT THEY
BROUGHT HER BACK TO A SECRET LABORATORY
253
00:19:04,444 --> 00:19:06,088
IN THIS HOTEL, BUT WHERE?
254
00:19:06,112 --> 00:19:08,657
I CAN JUST SEE SIEGFRIED
SITTING UP THERE, GLOATING.
255
00:19:08,681 --> 00:19:10,659
YOU DON'T HAPPEN TO SEE
HIS ROOM NUMBER, DO YOU?
256
00:19:10,683 --> 00:19:12,627
NO, MAX. BUT IF I
KNOW SIEGFRIED,
257
00:19:12,651 --> 00:19:15,597
HE'S UP THERE STUFFING
HIS FACE WITH FOOD.
258
00:19:15,621 --> 00:19:18,100
WAIT A MINUTE, 99.
THAT'S IT, YOU'VE GOT IT.
259
00:19:18,124 --> 00:19:19,768
WHAT HAVE I GOT?
260
00:19:19,792 --> 00:19:22,371
MAX, IF I GOT IT, I HAVE A
RIGHT TO KNOW WHAT IT IS.
261
00:19:22,395 --> 00:19:25,329
99, YOU'VE JUST GIVEN ME
A BRILLIANT IDEA. COME ON.
262
00:19:28,401 --> 00:19:30,312
HELLO, ROOM SERVICE, PLEASE.
263
00:19:30,336 --> 00:19:33,815
- MAX, ROOM SERVICE WON'T
DELIVER TO THE LOBBY.
- Man: Room service.
264
00:19:33,839 --> 00:19:36,485
HELLO, ROOM SERVICE,
WHAT'S GOING ON DOWN THERE?
265
00:19:36,509 --> 00:19:40,556
I ORDERED HOURS AGO. WHEN I
ORDER, YOU WILL DELIVER IMMEDIATELY.
266
00:19:40,580 --> 00:19:43,658
I don't understand, sir.
All our deliveries went out.
267
00:19:43,682 --> 00:19:46,695
BUT WHERE IS MINE? I ORDERED
KNOCKWURST, BRATWURST,
268
00:19:46,719 --> 00:19:49,664
LIVERWURST, FRIED
SAUERKRAUT AND A PRUNE DANISH.
269
00:19:49,688 --> 00:19:52,434
I see it on the list, but
the only order we had
270
00:19:52,458 --> 00:19:55,670
for bratwurst, knockwurst, liverwurst,
fried sauerkraut and a prune Danish
271
00:19:55,694 --> 00:19:57,839
was already
delivered to room 602.
272
00:19:57,863 --> 00:19:59,708
What room are you in?
273
00:19:59,732 --> 00:20:02,377
NEVER MIND, I'M NOT HUNGRY.
274
00:20:02,401 --> 00:20:05,147
- HE GAVE ME
THE ROOM NUMBER.
- MAX, THAT WAS BRILLIANT.
275
00:20:05,171 --> 00:20:07,516
OH, NOT REALLY, 99.
276
00:20:07,540 --> 00:20:09,784
IT REMINDED ME OF AN
OLD TRICK I USED YEARS AGO
277
00:20:09,808 --> 00:20:11,353
IN THE OPPENHEIMER CASE.
278
00:20:11,377 --> 00:20:13,722
YOU SEE, I REMEMBERED THAT
OPPENHEIMER WAS VERY FOND
279
00:20:13,746 --> 00:20:16,558
OF A JELLY DOUGHNUT ON
A RYE TOAST WITH GRAVY.
280
00:20:16,582 --> 00:20:19,861
WELL, THE CHIEF WAS ALL
FOR STORMING ROOM 401,
281
00:20:19,885 --> 00:20:23,432
BUT I WAS POSITIVE THAT
OPPENHEIMER WAS IN ROOM 802.
282
00:20:23,456 --> 00:20:26,001
CARLSON, ON THE OTHER HAND,
THOUGHT THAT HE WAS IN 903.
283
00:20:26,025 --> 00:20:29,004
WHICH WAS, 401, 802 OR 903?
284
00:20:29,028 --> 00:20:31,473
A CALL TO ROOM SERVICE
AND IT CONFIRMED MY OPINION.
285
00:20:31,497 --> 00:20:34,610
IT PROVED THAT
OPPENHEIMER WAS IN ROOM 802
286
00:20:34,634 --> 00:20:38,802
JUST AS SURELY AS
SIEGFRIED IS IN ROOM...
287
00:20:43,976 --> 00:20:46,510
ROOM SERVICE, PLEASE.
288
00:20:49,115 --> 00:20:51,093
PRACTICALLY NO INTERFERENCE.
289
00:20:51,117 --> 00:20:53,495
MADAM, YOU HAVE A
VERY QUIET STOMACH.
290
00:20:53,519 --> 00:20:55,163
THANKS A LOT.
291
00:20:55,187 --> 00:20:58,333
AND THIS ROOM IS THE
FEAR-GAS CHAMBER.
292
00:20:58,357 --> 00:21:00,602
WE ARE SAFE BEING IN HERE?
293
00:21:00,626 --> 00:21:02,403
JA, IT ONLY WORKS ON FEMALES.
294
00:21:02,427 --> 00:21:04,806
- YOU'VE SEEN
FOR YOURSELF.
- YEAH.
295
00:21:04,830 --> 00:21:09,044
IN THE ROMANCE-GAS
ROOM THE FEMALE RABBITS
296
00:21:09,068 --> 00:21:11,246
ARE CHASING THE MALE RABBITS;
297
00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:14,049
AND HERE THE FEMALES
RABBITS ARE SHRINKING
298
00:21:14,073 --> 00:21:17,619
FROM THE MALE RABBITS.
AND IN BOTH ROOMS
299
00:21:17,643 --> 00:21:19,755
THE MALE RABBITS ARE
JUST SITTING AROUND
300
00:21:19,779 --> 00:21:22,290
TRYING TO FIGURE OUT
WHAT THE HECK IT'S ALL ABOUT.
301
00:21:22,314 --> 00:21:24,626
IF WE GET POPOVICH'S
FINAL FORMULA,
302
00:21:24,650 --> 00:21:27,095
IT WILL WORK ON ALL
SEXES OF EVERY KIND.
303
00:21:27,119 --> 00:21:29,831
AH, BETWEEN ROMANCE AND FEAR,
304
00:21:29,855 --> 00:21:33,101
WE COULD RULE EIGHT
EIGHTHS OF THE WORLD.
305
00:21:33,125 --> 00:21:36,437
- WHY NOT
THE WHOLE WORLD?
- DON'T PUSH IT, SHTARKER.
306
00:21:36,461 --> 00:21:38,874
LET'S GO.
307
00:21:38,898 --> 00:21:41,509
This is Professor Popovich.
308
00:21:41,533 --> 00:21:45,213
Here is the final
formula for the nerve gas.
309
00:21:45,237 --> 00:21:48,483
NOW, CUT THAT OUT!
310
00:21:48,507 --> 00:21:53,021
WELL, I'M SORRY.
I DIDN'T MEAN IT!
311
00:21:53,045 --> 00:21:55,846
Precisely 23 F.
312
00:21:56,916 --> 00:21:58,393
ONE MORE HICCUP
313
00:21:58,417 --> 00:22:00,584
AND I WILL KILL YOU RIGHT NOW.
314
00:22:01,754 --> 00:22:05,067
WAIT, I KNOW A SURE
CURE FOR HICCUPS.
315
00:22:05,091 --> 00:22:06,534
WHAT IS IT?
316
00:22:06,558 --> 00:22:07,991
SCARE ME.
317
00:22:10,262 --> 00:22:11,395
BOO.
318
00:22:13,699 --> 00:22:16,000
IT WORKED.
319
00:22:17,770 --> 00:22:20,716
- - THAT WAS IT. I'LL
SHOOT YOU RIGHT NOW.
320
00:22:20,740 --> 00:22:22,873
NO.
321
00:22:34,487 --> 00:22:37,166
ALL RIGHT, SIEGFRIED,
DROP IT! HANDS UP!
322
00:22:37,190 --> 00:22:40,902
PUDDING, YOU'RE AS WELCOME
AS A NEW ROOSTER IN A HENHOUSE.
323
00:22:40,926 --> 00:22:44,073
WHAT KIND OF NONSENSE IS THIS?
FOUR OF US AND ONLY ONE OF HIM.
324
00:22:44,097 --> 00:22:47,242
PUT DOWN YOUR HANDS, PULL OUT YOUR
GUNS. HE CAN ONLY SHOOT ONE OF US.
325
00:22:47,266 --> 00:22:48,343
YOU'RE THE ONE.
326
00:22:48,367 --> 00:22:50,312
PLEASE, EVERYBODY, HANDS UP.
327
00:22:50,336 --> 00:22:52,769
PUDDING, LOOK OUT!
328
00:22:58,210 --> 00:23:02,357
OH, PUDDING, I'M SO GLAD WE...
329
00:23:05,517 --> 00:23:07,162
WHAT IS IT? WHAT IS IT?
330
00:23:07,186 --> 00:23:09,664
- DON'T YOU
COME NEAR ME!
- WHAT IS IT?
331
00:23:09,688 --> 00:23:11,499
WHAT IS IT?
332
00:23:13,192 --> 00:23:16,226
YOU TAKE YOUR THUMB
OUT OF YOUR MOUTH!
333
00:23:18,330 --> 00:23:21,365
ANNIE? ANNIE?
334
00:23:24,904 --> 00:23:26,837
Annie: HI.
335
00:23:33,245 --> 00:23:35,624
TAKE IT EASY, ANNIE. I'M
NOT GONNA TOUCH YOU
336
00:23:35,648 --> 00:23:38,727
AND I'M NOT GONNA
HURT YOU. JUST...
337
00:23:38,751 --> 00:23:43,164
ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
338
00:23:43,188 --> 00:23:46,267
WHAT'S THE MATTER
WITH YOU, ANNIE?
339
00:23:46,291 --> 00:23:49,371
I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU,
I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU,
340
00:23:49,395 --> 00:23:51,540
- I LOVE YOU,
I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU.
- ANNIE... ANNIE, STOP.
341
00:23:51,564 --> 00:23:53,709
- JUST TAKE IT EASY.
- KISS ME, KISS ME, KISS ME,
342
00:23:53,733 --> 00:23:55,544
- KISS ME, KISS ME, KISS ME.
- ANNIE, TAKE IT EASY.
343
00:23:55,568 --> 00:23:57,880
HEY, ANNIE, JUST TAKE IT EASY.
344
00:23:57,904 --> 00:23:59,837
OH-HH, HOW I LOVE YOU!
345
00:24:01,641 --> 00:24:04,853
- KISS ME, KISS ME,
KISS ME, KISS ME.
- ANNIE, WILL YOU STOP IT?
346
00:24:04,877 --> 00:24:06,588
GET AHOLD OF YOURSELF.
SIEGFRIED IS OUTSIDE.
347
00:24:06,612 --> 00:24:08,657
- WE'RE LIABLE TO GET KILLED.
- I KNOW, KISS ME, KISS...
348
00:24:08,681 --> 00:24:10,025
MAX?
349
00:24:10,049 --> 00:24:12,093
MAX, WHERE ARE YOU?
350
00:24:12,117 --> 00:24:13,495
MAX, WAIT, THE
BACK WAY IS CLEAR.
351
00:24:13,519 --> 00:24:15,130
- I'LL COVER IT FOR YOU.
- I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU...
352
00:24:15,154 --> 00:24:16,999
99, THE STRANGEST THING
HAS HAPPENED TO ANNIE.
353
00:24:17,023 --> 00:24:18,734
MAX, I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU,
354
00:24:18,758 --> 00:24:20,891
I LOVE YOU, I LOVE
YOU, KISS ME...
26850
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