All language subtitles for White.Famous.S01E02.Heat.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DD+5.1.H.264-playWEB_track3_[eng]

Hey!

Here’s what’s been
happenin’ on White Famous.

I’m making this movie about
an African American attorney.

My mom’s gonna
be over the moon.

She’s always wanted me
to be an attorney so--

- No, you play the old woman.
- Wait, what?

This very proud brown man
is trying to make you

a very successful
black man.

The goal has always
been white famous.

Why do I have to be
white famous?

- Oh, hell nah.
- There a problem?

Do I look like
the fucking valet to you?

- You have a baby?
- Who’s in the lead?

- Do you have a woman?
- Got a baby mom.

You should be more worried
about what next.

How about we open
some wine and brainstorm,

and if it gets
a little too late,

- we can have a sleepover.
- No.

I happen to be producing
a movie with Jamie Foxx.

Try this bitch on.

Floyd fucking Mooney.

You don’t think you
actually still have

a dick anymore, do you?

- Oh, no.
- It’s gone, nigga.

I ain’t gonna be
able to do it, Foxx.

Foxxy wants you in
the movie, motherfucker.

Floyd.

♪ hip hop instrumental ♪

That’s a wrap
for Floyd Mooney.

It’s not because
I prefer white women,

they’re just easy to sleep with.

I would choose Puerto Rican,

but they’re a headache.

Okay, I’m sorry.

Yes, yes, I’ll meet her.

All right, I gotta go.
I love you, bye.

Whoa, whoa, whoa,
hold up.

Ye ye!

- You wrapped, motherfucker?
- Thanks, Floyd.

Yeah, man,
thank the Lord.

Ooh, the man with his
first movie in the can!

- Come on, man, chill out.
- How does it feel?

How does it feel?

Let’s see, it feels
like my first movie

pretty much fucked me
in the can, raw dog,

- no lube, bloody stool.
- Good work.

Wow, that is just
disgusting to think about.

What are you
talking about, bro?

Being on set is the goat.

It’s the goat?

Yeah, being on set
is awesome.

You just sit around all day

and they just take
your funny shit,

and give it to the white guy,

and you can’t see your girl,

and you sure as hell don’t
have time to do the one thing

that you’re actually
passionate about,

which is stand-up,

and the pay
is surprisingly shitty,

so yeah,
remind to fire my agent.

Yo, man,
you gotta think

about the big picture,
Floyd.

Baby steps, baby boy.

You read those scripts
I sent you?

I read a few, I tried,
man, but a lot of that shit

is like a dick punch
to the soul.

Floyd!

You are a young, black buck
who just finished

his first fucking movie
in the middle of pilot season.

It’s your time!

You gotta focus, son!

I need to breathe.

I wanna get back
to my life.

I miss my kid.
I miss Sadie.

Now, that I understand
’cause that woman

could make a dead man cum.

But that’s not the point.

The point is you actually
got some heat right now.

For the first time
in recorded history,

I’m actually gettingincoming calls

about your black ass.

So what you gotta do
is help me

so we can
capitalize on this

so we can figure out
your next move.

My next move is home, nigga.

Why do you call me that, man?

You know I can’t respond.

♪ hip hop instrumental ♪

Sadie!

Hello?

Yo, yo!

♪ Body’s aching ♪

♪ From the want
and the waiting ♪

♪ Coming down
with a sickness ♪

Floyd!

Jesus, you scared
the crap outta me, asshole!

I’m sorry.

You can’t just walk in here
whenever you want.

I can when you leave
the front door unlocked.

I mean, you’re practically
begging to get molested.

You gotta get out,
I gotta get dressed, get out.

- Are you sure?
- Really.

- Really?
- Out!

You look good.

So where’s the boy?

Play date at Zoe’s house.

Who that?

- What?
- You haven’t been around much.

That’s not fair.
I’ve been working my ass off.

Yeah, I understand that,
but he’s just a kid.

He misses his daddy.

Well, I’m here now,

and whatever y’all need,
I got you.

Good, because we
have an interview

- at Broken Arrow tomorrow.
- What’s that?

Just the private school
I’ve been yakking

your ear off about
for the past six months.

Sadie, you know
how I feel about

all that
private school shit!

You know how I feel about it!

I thought we both agreed
we weren’t gonna do

all the typical LA shit.

Well, it turns out
there’s a reason

people do all
the typical LA shit.

Public schools
are overcrowded.

Kids get lost.

But it prepares you
for life.

Shit, if I wouldn’t have been
in public school so long,

I wouldn’t be
so fuckin’ funny right now.

I was there, remember?

And if we have an opportunity

to give our kid
a better education than we got,

isn’t it our responsibility
to make that happen?

Why you gotta go
and get all sensible

and motherly about it?

You’re right,
you’re always right.

I’m glad you think so.

Because you need
to be there tomorrow.

If both parents
aren’t there,

they’re not
gonna take us seriously.

How much?

- Does it matter how much?
- Yes! Yes, it matters.

You making
all these snarky comments

about me not being around,
now it sounds like you

want me to hit the road
so I can pay for all this shit.

Floyd, you act like

you’re the sole breadwinner
around here.

Between the two of us,
we can figure it out.

I’ll be there.

Good, thank you.

You’re welcome.

So, I’m back...

Yeah, I see that.

And I’m available
for anything you need.

Anything.

You can take
the garbage out.

Okay, yeah, yeah,
I’ll do it.

I’ll do it, I’ll do that
for sure, my pleasure.

You know what, you could
pick up Trevor from Zoe’s house.

Maybe take him out to dinner,
he’d love that.

Okay, all right,
all right.

Well, after the trash
and before the pick-up,

if there’s anything else
that needs tending to...

Floyd...

I know, I know,
okay, okay, you’re tired.

I’m a little wiped myself.

You know, maybe we
should just, uh, I don’t know,

cuddle and brush
each other’s hair.

I’ve been seeing someone.

- What?! Seriously?
- Yeah, seriously.

What the fuck, Sadie?!

What the fuck what the fuck?
We’re not together, Floyd!

Sometimes, we’re not
together sometimes!

Moments of weakness!

You call them
moments of weakness,

I call them dope as fuck!

Why you gotta drop it
right now?

Damn, that shit is cold!

Look, I’m sorry,
I’m sorry!

I didn’t wanna tell you over
the phone or text it to you!

Oh, why, ’cause you think
I couldn’t handle it?

Thought I was gonna be
heartbroken or some shit?

- No!
- Get over yourself.

Hey, be nice before you say
something you can’t take back!

Maybe I don’t
wanna take it back!

Not only is there a snake
slitherin’ around

in my fuckin’ garden,
now she wants me to pay

for private school too,
how ’bout them apples, Balls?

Yo, man,
quit actin’ out, man.

Fuck you talkin’ ’bout, man?

Yo, take a moment.

Think about how
you really feel

about this shit
and express that.

I don’t wanna hear none of your
male bravado nonsense right now.

You know what?

Do better.

Look, you love this woman,
she’s a good girl,

great mama to your boy,
she deserves to be happy.

Only you want her to
be happy with you, man.

That’s understandable,
shit, the heart wants

what it wants,
motherfucker.

But what if her heart
isn’t in the same place

as yours right now?

Look, you gotta make your peace
with that shit, man,

or it’ll eat you alive.

Know what, Balls, I think
I miss you most of all.

I miss you too,
nigga.

I just keep thinking about
where we went wrong, man.

Come on, man, you two
were too fuckin’ young.

Shit, high school sweethearts
and big Hollywood dreams,

they don’t fuckin’ go together,

then you throw a kid in there?

It’s amazing you lasted
as long as you fuckin’ did.

Shit, you fought the good fight,
nigga, you lost.

Now it’s time to accept defeat
and move on, man.

Everything’s
moving so fast, man.

Come on, man,
that’s life.

It’s a fuckin’ storm
out there all day, every day.

Where’s your happiness at,
Balls, man?

Where’s the woman
of your dreams?

Shit.

Yo, she out there
somewhere, man.

I know it.

She’s a lucky fuckin’ girl.

♪ R&B instrumental ♪

You just tried to kiss me.

What the fuck you doing
in my bedroom, Malcolm?

Floyd, you haven’t
returned my calls,

my emails, or my
beautifully framed dick pics.

- Get the fuck out!
- I can’t.

It’s time
to strategize, okay?

Muhammad has come
to the mountain.

Now, I need you
to brush yo teeth,

because your breath
smells like prison ass.

Get the fuck out!

I’ll be outside.

It’s gonna be
a great day.

Okay, well, I think
the first order of business

is probably getting you out
of this fuckin’ shithole.

Ay, this is
my fuckin’ home, Hodgy.

Sim sim sala suck my dick!

Ay, don’t be disrespecting
the domicile.

This is Balls Mamont.

I’m so sorry, Mr. Testicles,
but guess what?

It’s Hammer time!

All right, you remember
that super gay, superhero

CW pilot that you read for
two weeks ago?

Guess what, Baby Bubba?

They trying to test you,
or that sitcom

that had you coon it up,
you know,

that new version of Friends
with the one black friend?

Guess what, Tommy Davidson,
they’re trying

to shove you down the
producer’s fuckin’ throat, bro!

Here’s the thing, though,

what if I don’t
wanna do none of that shit?

You gotta
do something, Floyd.

- Why?
- Why?

Because it is
pilot season,

in the golden age
of diversity,

and you have a superpower!

You’re Blackman, okay?

There’s never been
a better time in Hollywood

to be a POC.

Ay, don’t do nothing
set in space,

or put on a fuckin’ cape.

- That shit’s weak.
- Who the fuck asked you?

- Ay, sit and spin, Mowgli.
- Hey!

Whoa, whoa, not cool,
man, not cool!

This suit right here
is worth more

than this entire
roach-infested snuff film

of an apartment combined.

Where does
the superhero one shoot?

- Vancouver.
- Pass.

I don’t wanna be away
from my kid right now.

What about the sitcom?

Shoots in New York.

Fuck!
What else you got for me?

There’s one more.

It’s less money, more prestige.

It’s some black
responsibility project,

it’s like a musical version
of Hidden Figures.

Teddy Snow is writing
and directing.

No, that motherfucker’s
crazy, right?

And you’re some
walk in the park?

Listen, Floyd,
he’s a big fan of yours,

and that makes him aces
in my book.

Well, send it to me, and I’ll
have Balls take a look at it.

You already have
the fuckin’ script, Floyd,

it’s one of the ones
you were supposed to read.

Where are you going?

We have accomplished
nothing, zero!

I gotta go meet up
with Trevor and Sadie.

Oh, uh, well, do tell milady
that I had the head

of the agency
put in a good word

for young Trevor
at Broken Arrow.

Why you gettin’ involved
in my personal shit, Malcolm?

I don’t care about you.

I don’t care about your boy.

I care about Sadie.

I would do anything for her.

Talk to Balls,
figure this shit out.

So what’s the story,
motherfucker?

What’s the five-year plan
for our boy?

Or do you even have one?

How do you keep him
true to his base,

and expand his brand?

Or are you just on some
short-term, money-grab shit?

Go ahead, ISIS,
I’m fuckin’ waitin’.

♪ hip hop instrumental ♪

So, what do you think?

It’s not a school, Sadie.
School should feel like prison.

School should make
you wanna bust out

and do something different
with your life.

You know what,
you really want our kid

to pick an elementary school?

Listen, I am not in
the mood for a bit right now,

I think that the interview
went really well,

you were charming,
and you were funny--

Yeah, that’s what I do.

Of course he’s gonna get in.

What makes you so sure?

’Cause
he’s black, Sadie.

He’s black,
haven’t you heard?

It’s the golden age
of diversity,

plus it’s a shit load of money,

and we willing to write a check,

so why wouldn’t he get in?

Yeah. Hey, do you, um,
wanna watch him tonight?

Why, hot date?

Floyd, you know it’s
none of your business.

You know, I wanna go up
at the J Spot tonight,

you know it’s been
a minute, so...

Really, you’d rather do that
than hang out with our kid?

You want me to hire
a babysitter,

is that what you’re
telling me right now?

That’s not what I’m saying,

of course I wanna hang out
with my son,

but I don’t
wanna play fuckin’ manny

while you out there
gettin’ wined, dined,

and potentially 69’d
by somebody

with peanut butter brown eyes--

Okay, first of all,
I’m not even into that.

- You ain’t into it?
- I like to relax--

- Mom! Hey, Mom!
- Hi, honey!

What do you think?

Guess it’s all right.

It’s all right?

Well, looks like you’re
having a blast over there.

I mean, just seems
kind of expensive.

Although, it is
really nice, but...

I don’t wanna grow up
being soft.

I like where your head’s at,
little man,

but you don’t gotta
worry about that.

Not ever.

You like it here?

’Cause that’s all
that matters.

Yeah, it’s awesome!

- What’s not to like?
- Cool.

I wanna show you
the robotics lab.

All right, cool.

I’m gonna be right there,

I just gotta make
a call real quick.

Okay. Come on, Mom!

Floyd?

I’ll take the fuckin’ meeting.

♪ hip hop instrumental ♪

Hi, Floyd?

- Yeah, that’s me.
- Take a seat.

I don’t give a fuck.

What do you
wanna fuckin’ do?

You wanna fuckin’ start
some shit with me, too?

I’ll fuck you
in the ass.

Fuck you.

Teddy will be right with you.

Uh...

Is everything okay
in there or...?

Yup, all good.

Lloyd!

- Floyd. Yeah.
- Floyd.

Stu Beggs calls you Lloyd.

Yeah, well, Stu Beggs
is getting on in years,

you know, dementia and shit.

Yeah, he’s shot.

You know he once had
a year-long relationship

with a blow-up doll
of his ex-wife?

He brought her everywhere,
showed up

to a premiere with it once.

Huge horse cock, though,

and a wonderful
philanthropist.

Come on inside.

All right.

Do I seem infectious to you
or something?

No.

Well, actually, yes.

It’s not personal, you know,
we’re all just filthy animals.

Yeah, but it’s not
a racial thing,

I just have
some OCD stuff.

Yeah, man, whatever,
man, do your thing.

I do love eating pussy.

Now what is this I hear
about black guys?

You, uh...

You don’t like to eat pussy,
is that like a...

Is that a real thing?

I love it. Eat it all day.

I’m sorry, man,
I don’t know

what the fuck
you’re saying right now.

Sorry, I have a problem
swallowing pills.

I have to let them dissolve
in my mouth, can’t swallow ’em.

All right, so, uh, what do you
know about this project?

Not much, man.

It’s set in the music world,
is it hip hop?

No, not at all.

But in a way, yes.

In 1980, punk rock scene
was exploding in LA.

Fear, Black Flag, The Germs,
all white kids, of course.

But there was this
one band, Angry Black,

it was these three young
black dudes from Venice,

they were writing songs
about Ronald Reagan,

and police brutality,

they were NWA
before there was an NWA.

- You ever hear about them?
- Nope.

That’s because they
burned out quick.

But the lead singer,
Xavier Duvall,

he was brilliant,
he was charismatic,

and he was funny as fuck,

and they had a white manager,
that’s me,

that’s the part I’m playing.

He tried to take ’em
to the next level,

but they wind up destroying
his life in the process.

X moved into his house,
he started fucking his wife,

and his daughter--

Ray needs to talk to you.

Who’s Ray?

The production designer.

Oh, what,
the Chinese fella?

Sure.

Five minutes.

Take your time.

Do you need anything, Floyd?

- Nah, I’m good.
- Okay.

Caught you lookin’.

Huh? Nah.

I wasn’t looking,
just, uh, just sittin’ here,

minding my own damn business,
that’s all.

I love your stand-up,
by the way.

Oh, word, you seen me live?

No, I just saw some stuff
on the internet.

Okay, right on.

You like to go
on the internet?

Uh, sure.

Where do you like to go,
on the internet?

W-What do you mean?

Like, when you’re
just trying to relax,

and blow off some steam.

Where we goin’ with this?

I like this one,
it’s called Baby Got Blacked.

Teen girls,
huge black cocks.

You’re fucking
with me right now, right?

Do you want me
to fuck with you?

Uh, listen,
you fine as fuck,

but, uh, I’m 100%

not interested in this
right now.

Okay, maybe 75%.

And decreasing.

When he says 5 minutes,

he really means 15 minutes.

Well, you know, a lot
can happen in 15 minutes.

I typically do my best work
in under 15 minutes, so, uh...

He’s so mean to me.

He never lets me
out of the house,

- he hates all my friends.
- Who now?

Hey, what the hell
is going on here?

Uh, nothing, man, just, uh,
we just-just marinatin’.

I take you into my house,
I try to further your career,

- and this is how you repay me?
- Hey, hey, man,

I don’t know what the fuck
you talkin’ about,

but this bitch
thirsty as fuck.

Whoa, you talkin’
’bout my daughter that way?

This your daughter?

How was I supposed to know
it was your daughter?

All right, good.
Good, good, good.

Now say it again,
say this, say,

"Is it becauseI fucked your daughter?"

Huh? Hmm?

"Or is it because a black man
fucked your daughter?"

’Cause that’s the core of
the scene, go ahead, say it.

Scene?
The fuck you mean, "scene"?

Come on, I know you
haven’t acted much,

so I needed to get you
into a raw place,

so we could access
those emotions.

Okay, and do it again,
same energy.

So is this
your daughter or not?

No.

What do you think, I would
pimp out my own daughter,

and put her in some
twisted Mandingo scenario?

This is Gwen, she’s playing
my character’s daughter.

Sorry, Floyd, but thanks
for making my job so easy.

Whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, relax.

You don’t want
the director to feel

like you wanna
fuck someone else.

I mean, we’re not gonna
be sleeping together

on this project,
but you don’t wanna make me

feel like
it’s out of my reach.

As a director, I need to feel
strong, sexual magnetism,

and big, potent,
baby-makin’ balls.

Got it, sorry, boss.

Listen, Floyd,
I need you to--

Man, fuck all y’all, man!

I’m out, this shit wack!

What wack?
What, you don’t want the part?

Come on, Floyd, use your heat,

tell an untold story
about your people.

You don’t want it?

Then fuck off and die,
you fuckin’ ingrate.

He can pay for his own parking.

♪ hip hop instrumental ♪

This is it, man.
This is the one.

- What is it?
- That Teddy Snow thing.

Oh, no, I’m not doing that,
that motherfucker’s crazy.

He’s also one of the greatest
filmmakers of our time.

He’s like Mel Gibson,
you may not want

to invite him to
your boy’s bar mitzvah,

but he makes some
pretty good fuckin’ movies.

Life is short, Balls.

Except when it’s long,
man, and you broke,

regretting
the road not taken.

Read it.

Thank me later.

I can totally see you
in this joint.

♪ hip hop instrumental ♪

You’re right,
Balls, it is good.

I’m always right,
motherfucker.

- And you got a visitor.
- Who?

Hey, it was great
to meet you, Balls,

and I appreciate the kind words
and thoughts, I really do.

You’re welcome.

I like that kid.

There’s something
really special about him,

I like the cut of his jib.

What the fuck
you doing here?

Look, I came to
apologize, okay?

About my somewhat
unorthodox approach

to auditions,
okay, but I figured

since we’re gonna be
working together,

we should get to know
each other a little better.

Working together, who said
we’d be working together?

I spoke to your dipshit agent.

I got some choices.

You’ve got choices?

What’s your other choice?
A sitcom?

Come on.

Let’s get out of here,
I wanna show you something,

but you, uh, you gotta drive,
I kind of, uh...

I don’t have
a license right now.

Come on, Floyd, man up!

This is it!

This is it.

This is where it happened.

X and the boys, they
lived in a filthy squat

- right over there.
- Oh, yeah?

Used to play the Whisky a Go Go
every chance they got.

And X died right there.

Right there in front
of a fuckin’ AMPM.

Twenty-five years old,
he was beaten to death

by the LAPD, can you
believe that shit?

Some things never change,
am I right?

Listen, man,
it’s a cool story,

and I dig your script,

but I’m not
a fuckin’ actor, man,

I’m just a fuckin’ comic.

Look, I saw your audition.

All right, and the
raw material is there,

you just need me
to help you shape it.

Look, I want you
in my film, man,

but you’re
at a crossroads.

You gotta figure out
what you wanna do.

You wanna do some
inconsequential

television crap,
make some dough?

Huh? You wanna do that?

Or wouldn’t you wanna try
to do something great?

Something special?

A story for your own--

- People.
- That’s right.

- Yeah, right, I get it.
- That’s right.

Come on. Huh?

Let’s go out,
you and me, we go out,

let’s, uh...

Let’s get polluted.

You and me, come on.

Let’s go get some tattoos,

let’s get wacky, you and me,
let’s get crazy.

Come on, give me the keys,
I wanna drive this puppy.

Come on, man,
you’re fuckin’ drunk.

- I’m not fuckin’ drunk.
- I smell it on you, dude.

Ah, what, I had
a few too many,

I’m not too drunk to drive,
give me my keys, man.

Oh, you wanna fuck around?

I fuckin’ jumped you now,
you fuck--

Hey, man,
what’s wrong with you?

Let go of me, man!

How does that feel,
you prick?!

What’s wrong with you, man?

What’s the problem?

This asshole won’t
give me my keys back.

What are you, five?
Give the guy his keys.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, why you
so sure that they’re his keys?

’Cause he’s white?

No, it’s more because
you look like a punk.

Yeah. A punk who was just
saying how much he hates LAPD.

Oh, interesting, look
who’s being prejudiced now.

Hey, it’s not true,
all right?

This is just some weird,
method acting game

that he’s doing right now.

That’s all it is.

Yeah, because I want you
to know what it’s like

to live in fear
of these motherfuckers, man.

I know what it’s like
to live in fear

of these motherfuckers,
I’m black, motherfucker!

No offense, Officer.

You’re apologizing to
this fuckin’ pig, man?

He killed one of your own,
right there, man!

Hey, look, Officer, uh...

G-Gustan, this is just
a misunderstanding.

All right, hands
behind your back.

W-Wait, I didn’t do nothing!

Wait, for what? For what?

Ah, shit, man!

He didn’t fuckin’ do anything,
you fuckin’ pig, man!

You want some of this,
too, Hollywood?

Somebody get this
on their phone!

Fuck you and fuck your racist
fuckin’ pig brethren, man!

Black Lives Matter, man!

Attica! Attica! Attica!

Give me an excuse, motherfucker,
give me an excuse!

Cut. Cut.

Tommy, that was great.
Excellent, excellent work.

Listen, next time, don’t get
the cuffs on him fully

so he can really, you know,
rage against the machine,

but that was great.

I want you to take
an emotional snapshot

of what just happened,
’cause that was beautiful.

We’re gonna run it back
one more time.

You got one more in you?

- You bet.
- Wait a minute.

This was just another one
of your fuckin’ games?

This ain’t a game, man,
this is a master class, man.

Acting is just life
shot through a prism,

with all the boring shit
cut out, man!

Fuck!

That’s it!

That’s it, that was beautiful,
that’s the character,

Floyd, you’ve got it, man!

- You’re crazy.
- What’s the matter?

We’re gonna go again.
You got another one in you?

That was fantastic, Floyd!

You got it, man,
you’re a fuckin’ star!

♪ hip hop instrumental ♪

All right, I’m here.

Put your face on.

Don’t wanna go scare
the poor guy off.

What happened
at the J Spot?

Wasn’t feelin’ it.

Had a weird night, I guess
I was overcome with the urge

to do something a little
more apologetic, maybe.

And?

I’m sorry, Sadie.

Sorry for all that
male bravado bullshit.

Sorry for not
respecting your right

to sample new penises,
as much as it makes me

wanna throw the fuck up.

Thank you.

Yeah. Yeah.

Or should I be
thanking Balls?

Hey, Dr. Balls to you.

Motherfucker missed his calling,
he should’ve been a therapist.

You know what,
I’m sorry, too.

I should have thought
of a better way

to talk to you
about this stuff.

There’s never a right way.

No, but we can’t keep falling
into bed with each other

when we’re lonely.

It’s confusing for Trevor,
it’s not healthy for us.

Speak for yourself, woman.

Floyd, come on,
everything you ever wanted

is starting
to happen for you,

you should
enjoy the ride,

don’t try
to complicate things.

Okay, but what if all
this shit is an illusion?

What if while I’m out here,
chasing some dream,

I miss out on the best thing
that’s ever happened to me?

What if all I want is you?

I mean, I don’t know
why the hell you’re so worried,

who’s gonna want some
busted single mom anyway?

Hey, ain’t a damn thing
busted about you, woman.

You’re hot.

And I love me
some single moms,

that’s my favorite
variety of ladyness.

I’m fucked, Floyd.

No one’s ever
gonna be sweeter.

Mm-hmm, talk about it.

No one’s ever
gonna be funnier.

Obviously.

What do you say
if I’m still single

when we’re 60,
wanna get married?

- Sixty?
- Yeah.

I gotta wait till I’m 60
to get back in there?

- It’s the new 40!
- Uh-uh.

Not for vaginas,

60 is not 40 for a vagina,
60 is 60.

That’s a 60-year-old pussy

we talkin’ about,
and that 60-year-old pussy

will have seen
a lot of shady dick,

so no thank you to your
shitty consolation prize.

I can not believe
you’re talking trash

about my aging lady.

What about your
tired old junk, huh?

- What about it?
- What’s that gonna look like?

It’s gonna be pretty
as a motherfucker.

And if I get older,
it might stretch out

a little more, too.

- Oh, my God.
- Extra 5 inches.

That’s 14.

You know I’m gonna
keep trying, right?

♪ R&B instrumental ♪

I-I should--

Yeah, you should.

You’re a good man,
Floyd Mooney.

♪ If you love me like you say ♪

♪ You do ♪

♪ Why do I feel so blue? ♪

♪ I just need someone ♪

♪ If you love me like you say ♪

♪ You do ♪

♪ Then why do I feel so blue? ♪