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1
00:00:03,454 --> 00:00:06,121
(humming)
2
00:00:06,198 --> 00:00:09,541
- Okay, just stay calm,
Gerald, stay calm.
3
00:00:09,618 --> 00:00:11,677
(humming)
4
00:00:18,585 --> 00:00:21,687
Ah, just pick something
and close the door.
5
00:00:23,524 --> 00:00:26,141
- Guys, guys, look
what happened.
6
00:00:26,218 --> 00:00:28,444
I have peach fuzz on my
face, peach fuzz, see?
7
00:00:30,555 --> 00:00:32,481
- Congratulations Ubuntu.
8
00:00:32,557 --> 00:00:34,524
This is your first
step into manhood.
9
00:00:34,535 --> 00:00:36,245
The other steps
are a lot more fun
10
00:00:36,269 --> 00:00:38,195
and usually involve strippers.
11
00:00:38,271 --> 00:00:39,496
- You are becoming a man.
12
00:00:39,573 --> 00:00:42,199
In your native Africa,
there would be a wonderful
13
00:00:42,275 --> 00:00:44,334
culturally relative
scarification
14
00:00:44,411 --> 00:00:48,455
or body mutilation ritual but
we're stuck here in America.
15
00:00:48,532 --> 00:00:50,758
So a first shave
is a perfect way
16
00:00:50,834 --> 00:00:52,876
to commemorate your transition.
17
00:00:52,953 --> 00:00:54,544
- Shave me, Daddy.
18
00:00:54,621 --> 00:00:56,254
- I'd better handle this one.
19
00:00:56,331 --> 00:00:59,132
If he needs help shaving
his legs, he'll come to you.
20
00:00:59,209 --> 00:01:01,226
- We've got a problem out here.
21
00:01:02,754 --> 00:01:04,440
People were honking
at me but I figured
22
00:01:04,464 --> 00:01:07,224
they just agreed with
our bumper stickers.
23
00:01:07,300 --> 00:01:08,681
- I'll call the tow company.
24
00:01:08,682 --> 00:01:11,311
- What kind of man doesn't
know how to change a tire?
25
00:01:11,388 --> 00:01:14,272
- Dad, changing a tire
doesn't make you a man.
26
00:01:14,349 --> 00:01:15,816
Now changing the world...
27
00:01:15,826 --> 00:01:17,901
- Yeah, yeah, bottom
line is your boy
28
00:01:17,978 --> 00:01:19,622
is becoming a man
and I'm the one
29
00:01:19,646 --> 00:01:21,196
who needs to show him the way.
30
00:01:21,273 --> 00:01:22,572
- Ubuntu is becoming a man?
31
00:01:22,649 --> 00:01:24,407
What exactly did you see?
32
00:01:24,484 --> 00:01:26,159
- Peach fuzz, feel it.
33
00:01:26,236 --> 00:01:27,244
- You sure you weren't
kissing bunnies
34
00:01:27,254 --> 00:01:28,334
at the pet store again?
35
00:01:28,363 --> 00:01:29,830
- It's for real.
36
00:01:29,906 --> 00:01:32,883
Good thing Grandpa Charlie's
here to teach him the ropes.
37
00:01:32,960 --> 00:01:36,586
- I don't want my dad teaching
our son about manhood.
38
00:01:36,663 --> 00:01:38,691
Shaving is the Trojan
horse he's going to use
39
00:01:38,715 --> 00:01:40,641
to sneak in and corrupt Ubuntu.
40
00:01:40,717 --> 00:01:42,597
Remember when Dad
took care of Chay?
41
00:01:43,378 --> 00:01:45,187
- Get it while it's bloody.
42
00:01:54,222 --> 00:01:55,522
What?
43
00:01:55,599 --> 00:01:57,243
- It took nearly a
week of soy enemas
44
00:01:57,267 --> 00:01:59,276
for Chay to come
back to his senses.
45
00:01:59,352 --> 00:02:01,286
- Mm-hmm and now
he's more committed
46
00:02:01,363 --> 00:02:03,205
to a vegan lifestyle than ever.
47
00:02:04,024 --> 00:02:05,165
- Done.
48
00:02:08,546 --> 00:02:09,922
- Thanks for fixing
the tire, Trish.
49
00:02:09,946 --> 00:02:12,747
It's so good to have
a friend in the biz.
50
00:02:12,824 --> 00:02:15,500
Oh hi Mo, are you
working here now too?
51
00:02:15,511 --> 00:02:17,294
- No, I'm more of a fan.
52
00:02:17,304 --> 00:02:18,679
I just love the smell.
53
00:02:20,516 --> 00:02:21,673
- Hey ma.
54
00:02:21,750 --> 00:02:22,632
- What?
55
00:02:22,709 --> 00:02:24,467
- No ma, not mom.
56
00:02:24,478 --> 00:02:25,686
- What?
57
00:02:25,762 --> 00:02:27,262
- Got any money, I need
to hit the drug store
58
00:02:27,273 --> 00:02:28,680
for some peroxide.
59
00:02:28,757 --> 00:02:32,526
My girlfriend says my tongue
ring's infected again.
60
00:02:34,304 --> 00:02:37,322
- Oh God, ew, get
away from me Kevin.
61
00:02:38,308 --> 00:02:39,324
Pig.
62
00:02:39,401 --> 00:02:41,234
- Get a room, you two.
63
00:02:41,311 --> 00:02:42,551
It's like they never broke up.
64
00:02:45,565 --> 00:02:46,565
- Ew!
65
00:02:47,025 --> 00:02:49,326
(laughing)
66
00:02:49,402 --> 00:02:51,369
- They grow up so fast.
67
00:02:51,446 --> 00:02:52,695
- That's why.
68
00:02:52,773 --> 00:02:55,299
Well, we haven't told
anyone else this but,
69
00:02:56,710 --> 00:02:58,627
we're gonna have another baby.
70
00:02:58,703 --> 00:03:00,378
- I had a feeling when I saw you
71
00:03:00,455 --> 00:03:01,338
but I didn't want
to say anything
72
00:03:01,414 --> 00:03:02,756
in case you weren't pregnant.
73
00:03:02,766 --> 00:03:04,341
That would be so embarrassing.
74
00:03:04,417 --> 00:03:05,417
- I'm not pregnant.
75
00:03:06,628 --> 00:03:08,011
- I was talking about Trish.
76
00:03:08,022 --> 00:03:09,229
- I'm not either.
77
00:03:10,015 --> 00:03:12,349
- See, Gerald?
78
00:03:12,425 --> 00:03:13,861
- We're still trying
to get up the courage
79
00:03:13,885 --> 00:03:15,352
to ask a sperm donor.
80
00:03:15,428 --> 00:03:17,938
It's kind of an awkward
subject to approach.
81
00:03:17,948 --> 00:03:20,941
- What about Kevin's
biological father?
82
00:03:21,017 --> 00:03:22,367
- Kevin was an accident.
83
00:03:23,311 --> 00:03:25,028
- How is that possible?
84
00:03:25,105 --> 00:03:26,571
- You guys are great parents.
85
00:03:26,648 --> 00:03:29,032
I'm sure you'll have no
trouble finding a donor.
86
00:03:29,109 --> 00:03:31,877
- We'd like it to be
someone we feel close to.
87
00:03:34,289 --> 00:03:36,331
- I am so happy!
88
00:03:36,408 --> 00:03:38,750
- Now do you accept
competitor's coupons
89
00:03:38,827 --> 00:03:41,595
and do you consider a
dry cleaner a competitor?
90
00:03:43,724 --> 00:03:45,340
- So Gerald, what do you think
91
00:03:45,417 --> 00:03:47,103
about Mo and
Trisha's proposition?
92
00:03:47,127 --> 00:03:48,343
- Great, just great.
93
00:03:48,420 --> 00:03:49,636
You know I always say,
94
00:03:49,713 --> 00:03:52,356
more gay couples
should have children.
95
00:03:52,432 --> 00:03:54,349
- Yeah, if I were Kevin's moms,
96
00:03:54,360 --> 00:03:55,767
I'd want a do-over too.
97
00:03:55,844 --> 00:03:58,061
- I'm so proud of
you Gerald Goode.
98
00:03:58,138 --> 00:04:00,730
- Well, thank you but.
99
00:04:00,741 --> 00:04:03,400
(yells)
(tires screeching)
100
00:04:03,476 --> 00:04:06,286
Oh my God, Mo and
Trish want my sperm!
101
00:04:07,331 --> 00:04:09,656
(upbeat music)
102
00:04:09,667 --> 00:04:12,417
(energetic music)
103
00:04:15,622 --> 00:04:19,424
(singing in foreign language)
104
00:04:27,709 --> 00:04:29,393
♪ The Goode Family ♪
105
00:04:34,433 --> 00:04:35,807
- I'm so excited!
106
00:04:35,884 --> 00:04:37,820
Giving a baby to a gay
couple is one of the
107
00:04:37,844 --> 00:04:40,770
greatest things any
human being can do.
108
00:04:40,847 --> 00:04:43,323
Margo's gonna crap
herself when I tell her.
109
00:04:43,400 --> 00:04:45,525
- Oh God, this is a nightmare.
110
00:04:45,602 --> 00:04:47,986
My ex-boyfriend is going
to be my half brother?
111
00:04:48,063 --> 00:04:49,487
Are you trying to screw me up?
112
00:04:49,564 --> 00:04:51,114
- We haven't really decided yet.
113
00:04:51,191 --> 00:04:52,532
- Are you kidding?
114
00:04:52,543 --> 00:04:54,617
This is the kind of
thing you guys live for.
115
00:04:54,628 --> 00:04:55,735
Look at mom right now!
116
00:04:57,447 --> 00:04:59,175
I'd better find a way
to deal with Kevin.
117
00:04:59,199 --> 00:05:00,957
- Let's keep this between us.
118
00:05:01,034 --> 00:05:02,762
Mo and Trish might
not want the whole
119
00:05:02,786 --> 00:05:04,461
neighborhood to know.
120
00:05:04,537 --> 00:05:06,588
- What do Mo and Trish
not want the whole
121
00:05:06,664 --> 00:05:08,048
neighborhood to know?
122
00:05:08,124 --> 00:05:10,186
- Gerald is donating sperm
to our lesbian friends
123
00:05:10,210 --> 00:05:11,593
so they can have a baby.
124
00:05:11,669 --> 00:05:13,011
- Please, Helen.
125
00:05:13,088 --> 00:05:15,513
- I know a place that
gives you 70 bucks a visit.
126
00:05:15,590 --> 00:05:19,017
Paid for my truck and the
boat that's hitched to it.
127
00:05:19,094 --> 00:05:20,810
- That's a lot of visits.
128
00:05:20,887 --> 00:05:22,362
- $70, huh?
129
00:05:22,439 --> 00:05:25,482
- Did I hear you say you're
giving Mo and Trish a baby?
130
00:05:25,558 --> 00:05:26,558
- We're not sure...
131
00:05:26,601 --> 00:05:27,994
- Yes.
132
00:05:27,995 --> 00:05:30,987
- If you give it to them,
Gerald, you can't take it back.
133
00:05:31,064 --> 00:05:33,573
Like the watering can.
134
00:05:33,650 --> 00:05:36,576
- Hey if you guys
are just giving out
babies, I'll take one.
135
00:05:36,653 --> 00:05:38,493
A child will solve
all my problems.
136
00:05:39,906 --> 00:05:42,632
- Go, go, Ubuntu needs
a new pair of clogs.
137
00:05:45,453 --> 00:05:46,453
Oh, I win!
138
00:05:47,506 --> 00:05:48,838
Grandpa, call our bookie.
139
00:05:48,849 --> 00:05:50,548
- I'm on it!
140
00:05:50,625 --> 00:05:53,676
- Mom, Dad, Grandpa's teaching
me how to invest in horses.
141
00:05:53,753 --> 00:05:56,012
- Gambling on animals?
142
00:05:56,023 --> 00:05:58,515
- Real men will
gamble on anything.
143
00:05:58,591 --> 00:06:00,442
- Charlie, I never gamble.
144
00:06:01,469 --> 00:06:03,436
- My point exactly.
145
00:06:03,513 --> 00:06:05,739
A real man grabs
life by the nicks.
146
00:06:05,816 --> 00:06:07,919
He starts the day on the
floor of the drunk tank
147
00:06:07,943 --> 00:06:09,826
and ends it on a
bed in a bordello.
148
00:06:09,903 --> 00:06:11,714
He gets a hernia and he
doesn't get it treated
149
00:06:11,738 --> 00:06:14,072
until his stomach
drops out of his thigh.
150
00:06:14,149 --> 00:06:15,149
- Cool.
151
00:06:16,609 --> 00:06:18,096
- A real man gives
lesbians his seed
152
00:06:18,120 --> 00:06:19,702
to father a child for them.
153
00:06:19,713 --> 00:06:21,955
Like Gerald is doing
for Mo and Trish.
154
00:06:22,031 --> 00:06:22,822
- Helen!
155
00:06:22,900 --> 00:06:24,457
- That's so awesome.
156
00:06:24,534 --> 00:06:25,208
- No, it isn't!
157
00:06:25,285 --> 00:06:26,876
Strippers are awesome.
158
00:06:26,953 --> 00:06:28,873
- I'm gonna have a
little half brother!
159
00:06:28,913 --> 00:06:30,138
I need to make him a card.
160
00:06:33,251 --> 00:06:34,737
- Are you sure
that being a donor
161
00:06:34,761 --> 00:06:36,886
for Mo and Trish is
the right thing to do?
162
00:06:36,963 --> 00:06:39,764
- Gerald, this is the
perfect way to show Ubuntu
163
00:06:39,841 --> 00:06:42,484
that real manhood is
not about selfishness
164
00:06:42,561 --> 00:06:44,227
but about selflessness.
165
00:06:44,304 --> 00:06:46,604
You'll get absolutely
no pleasure
166
00:06:46,681 --> 00:06:48,731
but potential responsibilities.
167
00:06:48,808 --> 00:06:51,234
Talk about leading
by example, huh?
168
00:06:51,311 --> 00:06:53,027
- Well that does sound right.
169
00:06:53,104 --> 00:06:56,156
- Helen, this
should interest you.
170
00:06:56,166 --> 00:06:58,992
The Greenville art
council just tapped me
171
00:06:59,068 --> 00:07:01,911
to curate this year's
irreverent and courageous...
172
00:07:01,922 --> 00:07:03,891
- Gerald is giving his
sperm to our lesbian friends
173
00:07:03,915 --> 00:07:05,248
so they can have a baby.
174
00:07:08,953 --> 00:07:11,096
- Damn it, Kent, I
can't do everything!
175
00:07:18,263 --> 00:07:21,440
(humming happily)
176
00:07:22,884 --> 00:07:24,985
(kissing)
177
00:07:27,013 --> 00:07:28,447
- Kevin, we need to talk.
178
00:07:29,682 --> 00:07:31,043
I just wanted to say
some things have changed
179
00:07:31,067 --> 00:07:33,276
and I think we should
try to be friends.
180
00:07:33,353 --> 00:07:36,529
You know, in case we ever
become related or something.
181
00:07:36,540 --> 00:07:38,300
- Oh, so you wanna
marry me, huh?
182
00:07:38,358 --> 00:07:39,524
- Ew, no.
183
00:07:40,443 --> 00:07:41,487
- How bout you get
the hell out of here
184
00:07:41,511 --> 00:07:42,551
before I bust you up.
185
00:07:43,630 --> 00:07:47,048
- Fight, fight, fight, fight,
kiss, fight, fight, fight!
186
00:07:48,201 --> 00:07:49,881
- Look, nitro
burning funny cars.
187
00:07:53,623 --> 00:07:54,631
- Hey, guys.
188
00:07:54,707 --> 00:07:56,299
Mo, put on some pants.
189
00:07:56,310 --> 00:07:59,186
Gerald and Helen are here
and they bought booze.
190
00:08:00,380 --> 00:08:02,931
- Mo, Trish, we have good news.
191
00:08:03,007 --> 00:08:07,861
Helen and I have discussed it
and well, our answer is yes!
192
00:08:09,698 --> 00:08:12,866
(screaming in joy)
193
00:08:12,943 --> 00:08:14,817
- Yes to what?
194
00:08:14,894 --> 00:08:16,119
- To what?
195
00:08:16,196 --> 00:08:17,621
Well to giving you a baby.
196
00:08:18,982 --> 00:08:20,698
(laughing)
197
00:08:20,775 --> 00:08:24,211
- Gerald, no offense, but we
may not want to have a girl.
198
00:08:25,738 --> 00:08:28,998
- Well, we're looking for
a man's man, no offense.
199
00:08:29,075 --> 00:08:31,626
- Well I appreciate that
you keep saying no offense
200
00:08:31,703 --> 00:08:34,963
but it might be easier if you
just stopped insulting me.
201
00:08:35,039 --> 00:08:38,183
- I'm confused, you said
it was awkward to ask.
202
00:08:39,419 --> 00:08:41,594
- And getting more
awkward by the minute.
203
00:08:41,605 --> 00:08:43,772
(laughing)
204
00:08:54,434 --> 00:08:55,858
- Not a man's man?
205
00:08:55,935 --> 00:08:57,944
I get hit on by
men all the time.
206
00:08:58,021 --> 00:08:59,715
- They're talking
nonsense, Gerald.
207
00:08:59,739 --> 00:09:00,863
They're lesbians!
208
00:09:00,940 --> 00:09:03,366
Their view of
masculinity is skewed.
209
00:09:03,443 --> 00:09:05,919
The important thing is
that Ubuntu can't find out
210
00:09:05,996 --> 00:09:08,329
or we'll lose him
to Charlie forever.
211
00:09:08,340 --> 00:09:09,706
- Find out what?
212
00:09:09,782 --> 00:09:10,982
- Nothing.
213
00:09:11,059 --> 00:09:13,137
- Mo and Trish don't
think I'm manly enough
214
00:09:13,161 --> 00:09:14,678
to give them a baby.
215
00:09:14,754 --> 00:09:15,971
Isn't that crazy?
216
00:09:18,750 --> 00:09:19,515
Isn't it?
217
00:09:19,593 --> 00:09:20,883
- I don't know, Gerald.
218
00:09:20,960 --> 00:09:22,885
You do wear women's jeans.
219
00:09:22,962 --> 00:09:24,721
- I have a wide pelvis.
220
00:09:24,731 --> 00:09:28,141
- Gerald, you carry
pepper spray in your bag.
221
00:09:28,151 --> 00:09:31,269
- So no one thinks I'm manly.
222
00:09:31,280 --> 00:09:32,737
Penny?
223
00:09:33,931 --> 00:09:36,035
- Well you always treat me
with respect and equality.
224
00:09:36,059 --> 00:09:38,401
You know, like a sissy.
225
00:09:38,412 --> 00:09:39,911
- Hmm.
226
00:09:42,231 --> 00:09:43,781
- Hi Mom, hi Dad.
227
00:09:43,858 --> 00:09:46,743
Were Mo and Trish super
happy about having your baby?
228
00:09:46,819 --> 00:09:50,255
- Well Ubuntu, let's just say...
229
00:09:51,449 --> 00:09:53,135
- Yes, they were
downright giddy.
230
00:09:53,159 --> 00:09:54,917
So Ubuntu, ready to get shaving?
231
00:09:54,994 --> 00:09:57,170
Because your father
is ready to teach you.
232
00:09:57,246 --> 00:09:58,129
- Yes, let's go...
233
00:09:58,206 --> 00:09:59,672
- He can't shave yet!
234
00:09:59,683 --> 00:10:02,091
He has to wait till the
beard and mustache connect.
235
00:10:02,102 --> 00:10:03,142
Every guy knows that.
236
00:10:04,754 --> 00:10:06,482
Women are like underwear,
you should change 'em
237
00:10:06,506 --> 00:10:07,606
every three days.
238
00:10:08,725 --> 00:10:09,932
- Gerald, this is terrible.
239
00:10:10,009 --> 00:10:11,434
We can't let this happen.
240
00:10:11,445 --> 00:10:13,072
Can you imagine if
that old buzzard
241
00:10:13,096 --> 00:10:15,071
gets his talents
into our Ubuntu?
242
00:10:16,140 --> 00:10:18,742
(evil laughing)
243
00:10:26,526 --> 00:10:28,960
- [Women] Chug it, chug, chug!
244
00:10:30,196 --> 00:10:33,089
- Sell, buy, sell, buy,
sell, buy, sell, buy!
245
00:10:34,793 --> 00:10:37,636
(evil laughing)
246
00:10:39,205 --> 00:10:40,838
- Oh God, what do we do?
247
00:10:40,915 --> 00:10:42,799
- There's only one thing
that's gonna trump Charlie
248
00:10:42,809 --> 00:10:44,425
and we know what that is.
249
00:10:44,502 --> 00:10:46,811
You have to father
Mo and Trisha's baby.
250
00:10:46,888 --> 00:10:49,347
- But they don't
want to have my baby.
251
00:10:49,424 --> 00:10:50,765
- Oh they will.
252
00:10:50,842 --> 00:10:52,901
(cool music)
253
00:11:03,279 --> 00:11:04,862
- I feel silly, Helen.
254
00:11:04,939 --> 00:11:06,114
- Listen, Gerald.
255
00:11:06,190 --> 00:11:08,991
Your job is to stay
silent and nod.
256
00:11:09,068 --> 00:11:10,785
And put this down your pants.
257
00:11:10,862 --> 00:11:12,370
- Helen, size doesn't matter.
258
00:11:12,447 --> 00:11:14,956
You explained that to
me on our fourth date.
259
00:11:15,032 --> 00:11:17,125
- I know that and you know that
260
00:11:17,201 --> 00:11:19,168
but lesbians don't know that.
261
00:11:19,245 --> 00:11:21,262
Now do it for Ubuntu.
262
00:11:30,357 --> 00:11:31,815
- Hey Helen.
263
00:11:31,891 --> 00:11:34,192
Gerald, is that you?
264
00:11:35,511 --> 00:11:37,520
Is everything okay
with the tires?
265
00:11:37,597 --> 00:11:40,523
- The tires are fine but
after we got home last night,
266
00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:42,742
Gerald and I kinda
ruined the shocks
267
00:11:42,819 --> 00:11:44,360
if you know what I mean.
268
00:11:44,437 --> 00:11:46,446
- We had car sex.
269
00:11:46,522 --> 00:11:47,864
(screams)
270
00:11:47,874 --> 00:11:48,874
Oh.
271
00:11:49,793 --> 00:11:51,159
- That's his mating call.
272
00:11:51,235 --> 00:11:52,752
Not now big guy!
273
00:11:58,168 --> 00:12:00,262
He's probably gonna see
if the vending machine
274
00:12:00,286 --> 00:12:01,919
has beer or tools.
275
00:12:01,996 --> 00:12:03,763
Men and their tools (laughs).
276
00:12:05,842 --> 00:12:08,727
(Gerald screams)
277
00:12:12,557 --> 00:12:14,315
- Is that a squash?
278
00:12:19,639 --> 00:12:22,565
- Yo, Ubuntu, I think your
sister's still into me.
279
00:12:22,642 --> 00:12:24,233
- Really?
280
00:12:24,310 --> 00:12:26,903
You should date her,
she's a wonderful person.
281
00:12:26,913 --> 00:12:29,405
- Yeah but I'm still
chilling with Amber.
282
00:12:29,482 --> 00:12:30,915
She buys me stuff.
283
00:12:32,109 --> 00:12:33,846
- My grandpa says
a real man can have
284
00:12:33,870 --> 00:12:35,578
as many girls as he wants.
285
00:12:35,655 --> 00:12:38,998
God put them on Earth
to make men happy.
286
00:12:39,009 --> 00:12:41,092
- I do deserve to be happy.
287
00:12:45,891 --> 00:12:46,964
- See ya, Daddy.
288
00:12:47,041 --> 00:12:48,881
Grandpa's taking me
to the news stand
289
00:12:48,927 --> 00:12:51,219
so I can decide what
my gentleman's magazine
290
00:12:51,295 --> 00:12:53,221
of choice is gonna be.
291
00:12:53,297 --> 00:12:54,931
- I like Dwell but...
292
00:12:55,007 --> 00:12:58,067
- We're talking about
nudie magazines, Gerald.
293
00:12:58,144 --> 00:12:59,144
- Bye Dad.
294
00:13:00,396 --> 00:13:03,064
- I used to get
Chocolate Nurse Magazine
295
00:13:03,074 --> 00:13:05,107
but they heavily
edited my letters
296
00:13:05,184 --> 00:13:06,910
so I canceled my subscription.
297
00:13:11,458 --> 00:13:13,950
- I feel so lost, Helen.
298
00:13:14,026 --> 00:13:16,911
I know Charlie isn't the
answer to showing Ubuntu
299
00:13:16,988 --> 00:13:20,048
how to be a man but now
I'm not sure I am either.
300
00:13:21,284 --> 00:13:23,134
I'm gonna go draw a bath.
301
00:13:23,211 --> 00:13:24,844
- Stop right there, Gerald.
302
00:13:24,921 --> 00:13:26,128
You are a man.
303
00:13:26,205 --> 00:13:28,223
You've just lost
your confidence.
304
00:13:29,542 --> 00:13:31,810
But I know how you're
gonna get it back.
305
00:13:33,421 --> 00:13:34,637
- A drum circle?
306
00:13:34,714 --> 00:13:37,315
- At the learning annex.
307
00:13:37,392 --> 00:13:39,943
- Reawaken your manhood
with the ancient
308
00:13:40,019 --> 00:13:42,946
Native American art
of drum circling.
309
00:13:43,022 --> 00:13:45,084
- They teach you how to
summon the mighty eagle
310
00:13:45,108 --> 00:13:46,315
inside of you.
311
00:13:46,392 --> 00:13:48,472
You're always saying
how you wanna do that.
312
00:13:49,562 --> 00:13:50,870
- Well that does sound good.
313
00:14:00,239 --> 00:14:01,664
Is this everybody?
314
00:14:01,675 --> 00:14:02,740
- This it.
315
00:14:02,817 --> 00:14:04,917
You ready to unleash
your inner man?
316
00:14:04,994 --> 00:14:08,671
- Okay, let's go
back in time when men
317
00:14:08,748 --> 00:14:12,216
sat in circles and
told tales of the hunt.
318
00:14:12,227 --> 00:14:13,968
And if you need to
go to the bathroom,
319
00:14:13,979 --> 00:14:16,012
you don't need to
raise your hand.
320
00:14:16,088 --> 00:14:18,022
(drumming)
321
00:14:23,095 --> 00:14:25,071
- Oh, easy friend.
322
00:14:25,148 --> 00:14:27,273
You wanna leave yourself
somewhere to go.
323
00:14:27,350 --> 00:14:29,025
- Wow, I'm really digging this.
324
00:14:29,101 --> 00:14:32,069
It's so raw, so tribal.
325
00:14:32,146 --> 00:14:33,362
- Who are we?
326
00:14:33,439 --> 00:14:35,072
- [Men] We are men!
327
00:14:35,083 --> 00:14:37,375
- Yes, yes, I am a man!
328
00:14:40,237 --> 00:14:41,245
- Good news, Bliss.
329
00:14:41,322 --> 00:14:42,463
We're back on.
330
00:14:42,540 --> 00:14:44,624
- What, ew, I'm not
interested in you.
331
00:14:44,700 --> 00:14:47,710
- But are you interested
in taking a shower with me.
332
00:14:47,787 --> 00:14:50,212
- You're not listening
to me, Kevin.
333
00:14:50,289 --> 00:14:51,472
I hate you.
334
00:14:51,549 --> 00:14:54,050
- There's a fine line
between love and hate.
335
00:14:54,126 --> 00:14:55,259
- No, there's not.
336
00:14:55,270 --> 00:14:56,270
You are so vile.
337
00:14:56,346 --> 00:14:59,013
- And now we kiss.
338
00:14:59,090 --> 00:15:00,090
- Ew.
339
00:15:03,603 --> 00:15:04,603
- Bliss?
340
00:15:04,679 --> 00:15:05,679
Bliss?
341
00:15:08,057 --> 00:15:09,057
Hey Amber.
342
00:15:10,367 --> 00:15:12,535
I guess we'll just keep
it you and me for now.
343
00:15:19,735 --> 00:15:22,161
(drumming)
344
00:15:22,238 --> 00:15:23,663
- It was amazing, Helen.
345
00:15:23,739 --> 00:15:26,207
I felt so alive in that circle.
346
00:15:26,283 --> 00:15:28,051
- You seem different.
347
00:15:28,127 --> 00:15:29,385
You even smell different.
348
00:15:32,131 --> 00:15:33,514
- I'd say musky.
349
00:15:35,101 --> 00:15:37,343
- Gerald, Ubuntu
needs to see you drum
350
00:15:37,420 --> 00:15:39,095
in all your primal glory.
351
00:15:39,171 --> 00:15:41,263
Charlie can never
compete with that.
352
00:15:41,340 --> 00:15:42,395
- You're right.
353
00:15:42,396 --> 00:15:44,266
Gambling and
pornography have nothing
354
00:15:44,343 --> 00:15:46,486
on the ancient
rhythms of the forest.
355
00:15:50,683 --> 00:15:52,617
Nice face paint, Chad.
356
00:15:52,694 --> 00:15:55,569
Did you finally tell your
boss how you feel Timothy?
357
00:15:55,646 --> 00:15:57,196
You will.
358
00:15:57,207 --> 00:16:00,032
Hey Franklin, we have to
hit the skins hard today.
359
00:16:00,043 --> 00:16:02,203
My son's coming straight
from football practice
360
00:16:02,278 --> 00:16:03,411
to watch us.
361
00:16:03,487 --> 00:16:05,755
- Damn, and my carpal
tunnel acting up.
362
00:16:05,832 --> 00:16:08,165
Drum it away,
Franklin, drum it away.
363
00:16:08,242 --> 00:16:10,093
- Okay, men, let's hit it.
364
00:16:11,504 --> 00:16:12,795
- Step it up, boys.
365
00:16:12,872 --> 00:16:14,171
Drum like thunder.
366
00:16:14,248 --> 00:16:15,640
Now we're hitting it.
367
00:16:15,717 --> 00:16:17,466
- Ladies.
368
00:16:17,477 --> 00:16:19,602
We're in the spreadsheet
class next door
369
00:16:19,679 --> 00:16:21,479
and we can't hear
ourselves think.
370
00:16:22,691 --> 00:16:25,224
So bring down the tippy
tappy to a pitter patter.
371
00:16:25,301 --> 00:16:26,067
You got it?
372
00:16:26,144 --> 00:16:29,112
- Sorry, it won't happen again.
373
00:16:33,517 --> 00:16:35,568
- Wait, we're in a
drum circle class.
374
00:16:35,644 --> 00:16:37,537
We shouldn't have
to keep it down.
375
00:16:37,613 --> 00:16:40,081
- Oh yeah, I say you do.
376
00:16:41,567 --> 00:16:43,543
So I'm gonna adjust
your volume control.
377
00:16:44,779 --> 00:16:47,121
- He done knocked a
hole in your drum.
378
00:16:47,132 --> 00:16:48,340
- What do you say?
379
00:16:48,341 --> 00:16:50,260
Your inner man wanna
do something about it?
380
00:16:50,284 --> 00:16:52,135
Huh, does it?
381
00:16:57,383 --> 00:17:01,060
- No, I'm sorry,
we'll keep it down.
382
00:17:01,137 --> 00:17:02,137
- Thought so.
383
00:17:08,594 --> 00:17:11,771
- Oh God, you guys are gonna
Eyes Wide Shut me, aren't ya?
384
00:17:11,847 --> 00:17:13,573
- Dad, I'm connected.
385
00:17:13,649 --> 00:17:14,741
I'm ready to shave.
386
00:17:15,827 --> 00:17:17,493
Teach me, teach me!
387
00:17:20,898 --> 00:17:22,415
- Go with your grandfather.
388
00:17:22,492 --> 00:17:24,412
He can teach you what
you need to know.
389
00:17:39,809 --> 00:17:41,175
- So how did it go?
390
00:17:41,252 --> 00:17:42,384
Did Ubuntu like it?
391
00:17:42,461 --> 00:17:43,561
I'm sure he was...
392
00:17:45,631 --> 00:17:47,482
Uh oh, what happened?
393
00:17:48,610 --> 00:17:50,893
- Some spreadsheet
bullies broke my drum
394
00:17:50,970 --> 00:17:52,853
and I didn't do
anything about it.
395
00:17:52,864 --> 00:17:57,691
- Oh, well restraint and
passivism are manly attributes...
396
00:17:57,768 --> 00:17:58,768
- Don't, Helen.
397
00:18:00,646 --> 00:18:02,374
- [Grandpa] Now in a few
years, you'll need to learn
398
00:18:02,398 --> 00:18:03,398
how to shave drunk.
399
00:18:09,914 --> 00:18:11,163
- Mo, Trish?
400
00:18:11,240 --> 00:18:12,623
What are you guys doing here?
401
00:18:12,634 --> 00:18:14,291
- Sorry, Gerald.
402
00:18:14,368 --> 00:18:16,346
Kevin climbed up your
tree and won't come down.
403
00:18:16,370 --> 00:18:18,232
- [Kevin] And I'm not
coming down until Bliss
404
00:18:18,256 --> 00:18:20,381
takes me back or Amber.
405
00:18:20,457 --> 00:18:22,424
- We've never seen
him like this.
406
00:18:22,501 --> 00:18:23,926
We don't know what to do.
407
00:18:24,003 --> 00:18:26,178
We can't burn him out.
408
00:18:26,255 --> 00:18:27,255
Can we?
409
00:18:30,268 --> 00:18:31,584
- [Kevin] Ubuntu,
you said I could have
410
00:18:31,585 --> 00:18:34,270
as many girls as I wanted
and now I have none.
411
00:18:34,346 --> 00:18:35,363
- You said that?
412
00:18:36,607 --> 00:18:37,731
- That's what Grandpa
told me, right, Grandpa?
413
00:18:37,742 --> 00:18:38,742
- Damn straight.
414
00:18:40,311 --> 00:18:42,444
- Now I may not know
everything about women
415
00:18:42,521 --> 00:18:45,206
but I do know that
that is dead wrong.
416
00:18:45,283 --> 00:18:47,908
You should always treat
women with respect
417
00:18:47,985 --> 00:18:50,286
and as individuals
now come on down.
418
00:18:50,362 --> 00:18:51,829
- [Kevin] I'm not coming down.
419
00:18:51,906 --> 00:18:54,715
My heart is broke
over Bliss or Amber.
420
00:18:57,503 --> 00:18:59,795
- Kevin, I know you
think you're angry.
421
00:18:59,872 --> 00:19:01,264
But you really aren't.
422
00:19:01,340 --> 00:19:03,841
What you're feeling
is sad and rejected
423
00:19:03,918 --> 00:19:07,186
but those are scarier feelings
to let out, aren't they?
424
00:19:07,972 --> 00:19:09,430
- Yes.
425
00:19:09,506 --> 00:19:11,307
- It's okay, Kevin.
426
00:19:11,383 --> 00:19:14,476
I always tell Ubuntu that it
takes real courage to cry,
427
00:19:14,553 --> 00:19:15,978
especially for a man.
428
00:19:16,055 --> 00:19:17,646
- Oh God.
429
00:19:17,723 --> 00:19:18,803
- Go ahead, let it out.
430
00:19:19,934 --> 00:19:22,234
(Kevin crying)
431
00:19:22,311 --> 00:19:23,311
- I wanna come down.
432
00:19:27,024 --> 00:19:28,490
I don't wanna be alone.
433
00:19:28,567 --> 00:19:30,826
I wanna be with Bliss or Amber.
434
00:19:30,903 --> 00:19:33,662
- Kevin, if you learn how
to make a girl feel special
435
00:19:33,739 --> 00:19:36,749
you will never need to
worry about being alone.
436
00:19:36,825 --> 00:19:40,178
But you really do need to
decide between Amber or Bliss.
437
00:19:41,997 --> 00:19:42,997
- What, no!
438
00:19:43,791 --> 00:19:46,350
- I strongly suggest Amber.
439
00:19:49,964 --> 00:19:50,964
- Amber!
440
00:19:52,091 --> 00:19:53,474
- Wow, Gerald.
441
00:19:53,550 --> 00:19:55,559
That was impressive.
442
00:19:55,636 --> 00:19:57,353
- Manly even?
443
00:19:57,429 --> 00:20:00,397
- In a weird way, yes.
444
00:20:00,474 --> 00:20:03,359
- You know we realize we have
our hands full with Kevin
445
00:20:03,435 --> 00:20:06,028
and we'll probably be
raising a baby of his anyway.
446
00:20:06,105 --> 00:20:08,656
So we're not gonna have
another of our own.
447
00:20:08,732 --> 00:20:11,784
- But if we did, you'd
be the type of man
448
00:20:11,860 --> 00:20:14,286
we'd want to be the donor.
449
00:20:14,363 --> 00:20:15,363
- Really?
450
00:20:16,690 --> 00:20:18,218
- Would you two mind
telling Margo that?
451
00:20:18,242 --> 00:20:19,750
- Come on Ubuntu, let's
leave these crybabies.
452
00:20:19,761 --> 00:20:20,968
It's time to shave.
453
00:20:21,954 --> 00:20:23,337
- No, Charlie.
454
00:20:23,414 --> 00:20:24,880
Ubuntu is my son.
455
00:20:24,957 --> 00:20:25,957
I'll shave him.
456
00:20:34,317 --> 00:20:37,810
Now the first step when
shaving is to exfoliate.
457
00:20:37,820 --> 00:20:39,520
- Exfoliate, got it.
458
00:20:39,596 --> 00:20:40,729
With what?
459
00:20:40,806 --> 00:20:42,949
- Well chamomile is
not just for tea, son.
460
00:20:49,073 --> 00:20:50,906
Let's turn it up a notch.
461
00:20:50,917 --> 00:20:53,334
- What about the
spreadsheet guys?
462
00:20:53,411 --> 00:20:55,091
- Oh, I'm not
worried about them.
463
00:20:58,124 --> 00:21:00,258
They come on
Wednesdays and Fridays.
464
00:21:01,127 --> 00:21:02,051
(cheers)
465
00:21:02,128 --> 00:21:03,794
- Then I'm taking my shirt off.
466
00:21:03,805 --> 00:21:05,930
(drumming)
467
00:21:09,168 --> 00:21:11,894
(energetic music)
468
00:21:29,813 --> 00:21:33,582
(singing in foreign language)
469
00:21:37,196 --> 00:21:40,047
♪ The Goode Family ♪
32708
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