All language subtitles for S01e14 - A Big Finish

I don't own a dog. I don't plan on
owning a dog. And furthermore, I don't

being called a liar by anybody. I don't
care what the reason is.

Oh, stop it. Not together. No, we got to
go again.

So, shall we hear the Birdman of
Alcatraz?

Well, this is our chance to be the
Dogman of Sing Sing.

Making music has been my claim.

Day after day, it gets down to fame.

I don't have any homework this weekend
because I'm doing the benefit.

You have anything to do with that
benefit, you're out of the school.

big dreams you want fame well fame comes
and right here is where you start

paying and sweat

Oh, good morning.

What are you doing here, sir?

Or madam, as the case may be.

Let me guess.

Either you're wearing the most
incredible leg warmers I've ever seen,

a dog.

And if you're a dog, you know what?

You're getting out of here right now.

Oh, no, you don't.

Sherwood, you all right? Oh, thank you,
Tim. I'm fine, really.

You better watch it, jogging inside like
that.

I usually do the floors this time of
morning before the kids get here.

I wasn't jogging. I was chasing that
idiot dog.

What dog?

The dog that was... You didn't see a dog
come tearing past you about three

seconds before I made my graceful
entrance?

No, I didn't.

Well... Weren't you out here?

Oh, I sure was.

Right over there.

I didn't see any dog.

Okay.

Thanks for your help, Tim.

Take care.

You be the one taking care. I wasn't the
one who fell down.

What are you doing here? Come here.

I'm in enough trouble.

Now, where's Bertie?

Where's Bertie, you jerk? Go find
Bertie. Go on. Go find him.

Passé.

Hold his balance. Be there. Come on.

Keep your center.

Passé. Now, really turn this knee out.
Roll this leg.

Roll over. Right.

And passe.

Pull up, darling. Come on.

Put it way back.

Come on, honey. Pull up. Pull up. You
can get rid of this. And releve.

Hold. And five, six, and seven, eight.
Come on. Pull up. Pull up.

Parabas. Come through.

Devlopay arabesque and turn around.

Potty beret.

Fourth and pirouette.

Tendu. Close fifth.

Tendu. Other side and... Mrs. Sharofsky.

What are you doing?

I'm measuring, and your room is perfect.

Oh, thank you. Perfect for what?

My doctor says I need exercise and uses
the only room in the school where I can

store my equipment.

What sort of equipment are we talking
about here?

Table tennis.

Falls hard up against the wall when I'm
not using it. You know about it all.

You're talking about a ping -pong table?
Please, table tennis, not ping -pong.

Well, yes, but...

Well, are you sure that's going to be
enough exercise for you? I mean, what

about real tennis? You know, they have
indoor courts you can use.

Table tennis is very real, thank you.

And what you call real tennis is bad for
pianos.

Builds up the forms in the wrong way.

Loses flexibility.

Well, it's just that it's going to start
looking like a summer camp around here.

Aren't we the cute ones, though? We are
just so funny.

It's all right with you, then?

Sure, fine, whatever.

Blessings. I'll tell them to bring it on
up. Mrs. Giroux.

Get on back in this room.

Oh, I know that must be the high point
of your day.

Oh, and I'm so happy for you because
you're getting ready to hit the low

right now.

Give me 50 entre -chicot royales. And
since we want to all be so together and

cute, if anybody misses one jump or
beat, we start again until we all get it

right together.

see them jump.

You're going to be wishing for a heart
transplant in about 30 seconds.

Five, six, seven. Are

you

done

already? Oh, no, I'm not, but
something's wrong. About what?

She's been like that the whole class.

I ask her what's wrong and she just
waves me off.

All right, Montgomery, you go back to
your seat.

I'll take care of this.

Doris, are you all right?

Sure. Doris, have a witness.

Well, I have to admit, I'm a little sad.

Mad.

Confused. Why?

It's that time of year.

Time of year?

I... I, uh... I... I, uh... What?

Allergies.

Oh, I see.

And that's what the tears and the
sniffles are about.

Uh -huh.

Anytime I get a... People who grow
flowers.

Places that are dusty.

Certain kinds of material.

Bless you.

Thank you.

Dogs. Or anybody who's been around dogs.

And there was a dog.

Bless you.

Thank you.

I gotta go see my allergist this
afternoon.

I gotta get some shots.

Doris, before you get those shots, could
you do me a favor?

I can.

In the old days, miners used to take
canaries with them down into the mines.

theory being that any poison gas would
knock out the little canaries long

it could affect a grown man, giving the
miners time to escape.

All this has to do with a favor?

I want to get you with Mr. O 'Banion,
the janitor, to be my canary in the

Straight ahead now. Good.

Mr. Swierowski, is that a ping -pong
table?

This is a table tennis table.

Around the corner.

Second group to your left.

Put it up against the wall.

Miller.

Sixth period. Do you have a rehearsal
hour scheduled? Is this correct?

Yes. I'm rehearsing the Schumann
concerto.

Nonsense. A waste of time. You have that
down pat.

What do you think I should rehearse?

Miller.

Did you ever play table tennis?

Look at that. Beautiful.

You got plenty of air coming through
there.

Well, I'd appreciate it if you'd check
the vent in the back of the room as

It seems to take forever for us to get
any heat in here once the thermostat

kicks in.

Well, it may take forever, but you gotta
remember this is a pretty old building.

Things slow up when you get older.

People and things.

Back to life. Just check it out, please.

All right.

Maybe I could get somebody over to
really check this out, but I don't think

necessary. I think it's doing just fine
the way it is if you want to know the

truth. Yes, I want to know the truth,
but I'm not talking about anything

concerning the vent.

I'm not sure I know what we're talking
about. We're talking about that dog I

in here this morning.

A dog in school? Is that such a big deal
to you?

I couldn't care less about a dog in the
school. What I do care about is someone

I work with lying to me.

And I think that's what you did this
morning. I'd like to know why, please.

You think Tim O 'Banion's a liar, is
that what you're saying?

Oh, Tim, for heaven's sakes, if you're
keeping a... No, no, it's not Tim.

It's Mr. O 'Banion, thank you very much.
If you're Miss Sherwood, I'm Mr. O

'Banion to you.

All right.

All I'm trying to do... And another
thing, I don't own a dog. I never owned

dog. I don't plan on owning a dog.

And furthermore, I don't like being
called a liar by anybody. I don't care

the reason is.

We're done.

I think Mr. Barnum's going to pay a
fortune for this act. Doris, come on.

Do you have to be anywhere in a hurry? I
mean a hurry to go home.

I live there. I go there. I recognize my
father. He remembers who I am. It's

really kind of nice.

Could you put it off for an hour or so?

Why? I need some help with a deprived
childhood.

I gave at the office.

No, listen, when I was little, nobody
ever taught me how to sneak.

Where do you want to sneak to?

The janitor's office.

Why?

Because this morning, Mr. O 'Banion
became a person.

It's probably the full moon.

No, I mean, there are people who aren't
really people.

They're just there.

Gas station attendants, movie ticket
takers, school janitors. You know, it's,

good morning, Mr. O 'Banion, how you
doing? And you never even slow down to

what he has to say.

And this morning, this transformation
happened.

Yeah. He looked like he was going to
cry.

I think he lied to Ms. Sherwood about
something.

Could someone tell me what we're talking
about?

Doris had a depraved childhood.

She needs sneaking lessons.

Intel band?

Janitor's office is down there. Yeah,
and if we get caught down there... No, O

'Banion's on the third floor waxing. He
won't be down there for at least a

couple hours.

Yeah, and if he's got a dog and he's got
it cooped up in there, it's not fair.

Doris, life isn't fair.

God put Bo Derek on Earth to prove that.

Doris, it's a lot like breaking an
entrance.

Whose side are you on?

I'm committed to freedom.

My freedom.

So come on, let's get out of here. Okay,
fine.

I'll break and enter. You cut and run.

Suits me fine.

Dosh, are we here in the Birdman of
Alcatraz?

Well, this is our chance to be the
Dogman of Sing Sing.

We're deep in dog territory.

Take my word for it.

told you there was a dog.

Yeah, look how unhappy and mistreated
the poor thing is.

Hey, look, what's this?

That's Mr.

O 'Banion. He was a dancer. This is
Broadway stuff here.

Who's this?

Bertie Whalen.

Bertie Whalen.

My grandma talks about him all the time.
She said he was the best.

There's no one that even comes close.

Oh, he's probably gone by now.

Not quite, young lady.

I'm very much here.

And quite pleased about it, if I do say
so myself.

Oh, would you care to join me in a cup
of tea?

You've been here how long?

Oh, about three months.

Ever since I got booted out of my room.

I couldn't come up with the rent.

Had to spend the money on medicine.

What do you need the medicine for?

Well, I fell down and broke my hip.

And Mr. O 'Banion fixed this place up
for you? No, no, no, no, not at first.

The first thing he did was to try to get
me in with him at his place, but they

don't take pets there, you know. And
I've been with Clumpy, or he's been with

me, ever since I stopped dancing.

That's too many years to throw away just
because of what it says on some lease.

I think that's terrific.

To fall down and break your hip and get
thrown out of your room?

Not really, young man. No, I mean to
have a friendship with someone, like you

and Mr. O 'Banning have.

It's something that lasts for decades.

Well, we were not friends till I fell
down and broke my hip.

Why not?

Well, because producers were always
trying to play us against each other.

know, if they wanted me for a part, they
never failed to let Timmy know about

it. And if they really wanted Timmy,
they never failed to mention my name as

possibility. And when you broke your
hip?

Well, when I broke my hip...

God love him.

He came to me and... I came to him and
said, I said, Bertie,

you and I have gone through times, done
things few other human beings have

known.

There are tales we can tell that only
you and I can truly understand.

And, you know, it seems a shame for each
of us to ignore the only audience that

either one of us has got left.

That's right. That's what he said.

That's what got me and old Clumpy here.

Only question now is, are you going to
get to stay here?

Because if any one of those teachers
upstairs finds out that Bertie's staying

down here, he'll be out on his ear and
I'll be out of a job.

Well, you can't expect to stay here
forever.

Well, just until we can raise another $3
,000, huh?

You see, a friend of Bertie's runs a
trailer camp down in Bradenton, Florida.

Now, with what we've got so far, plus
another $3 ,000, we can make a down

payment on a trailer and place in the
park. Yeah, we'll put our touches in the

sand and our hooks in the water.

Just as long as nobody upstairs finds
out what's going on down here.

Well, if they won't. Then you can count
on it. We'd better get back upstairs

before someone comes looking for us.

Thanks for the tea. Yeah, thank you very
much.

Thanks. Is there anything I can get you?

Anything we can do?

Yes.

Yes, you can tell Leroy not to argue
with Miss Grant so much.

What? I can hear the dance class through
the vents.

She's a good teacher.

She knows what she's talking about.

Now, all he's got to do is listen.

Just a little bit harder.

Okay.

I'll pass it on.

I hope this doesn't hurt your feelings
too much, but it sure felt good talking

to somebody besides you.

I think I can handle it.

You might have some making up to do with
Clumpy, though.

Okay, Mr. Sharofsky. Serving. Zip, zip.

What was that?

That was the opening serve.

It was a floating insult.

Now serve properly, please.

Okay, but Mr. Sharofsky, like I said,
pretty good at this game.

Humor me.

Okay.

Okay.

Zero serving one.

Herschel, Doris?

Yeah. Uh, Mr. Wood.

I got to thinking after class, and I
remembered it's not dogs I'm allergic

It's cats.

You just remembered this?

Yeah, well, see, I heard you talking to
Mr. O 'Banion, and he seemed so sincere

about not lying about there being no
dog.

And then I remembered that it's not dogs
I'm allergic to. It's cats.

This just happened to come to you as you
overheard us talking, huh?

Yeah, well, see, after... Actually, I'm
allergic to both, but dogs give me a

cherry rash. It's cats that make me
sneeze.

And you have to admit, he did seem very
sincere when he told you he wasn't

lying. He never told me that.

Sure he did.

I heard him.

Doris, I'm quite careful about words and
their meaning.

Now, what he said was that he didn't own
a dog, that he wouldn't own a dog, and

that he didn't like being called a liar
by anybody. And I believe that last

part, because he didn't like it one
little bit, and he was lying.

You know something?

You'd make a terrific lawyer.

I think I would have been particularly
good at spotting perjury.

21 to 3. He killed me, that silly old 21
to 3. And I think he let up on me

towards the end. I could die.

See you tomorrow.

Have a nice evening.

How do we know whether or not I listened
to the woman? He can hear through the

vents. He can tell that much just by
listening? That's what he says.

Both of them were pretty big in the old
days.

That's bad. I mean, two old guys like
that having to hide out in a little room

in a basement.

But the main thing is not to let
everyone know they're down there. So

telling anyone about them. All right.

Yesterday I went down to the 42nd Street
Library.

I looked it up. Did they check out?

Yeah.

They were the best.

Either one of them could have packed the
theater.

Lots of choreographers still study the
stuff they were doing in the 40s. Does

Miss Grant know that a janitor in this
school is... No, and don't tell her.

It's very important the whole school
does not realize what is really going on

downstairs.

All right, I understand.

My dad said no one even came close to
what they did. He said he stood in line

for hours to see them.

Did they ever dance together?

No, they were always rivals, he said.

First rivals, last friends.

Now, that's sad. We ought to try to do
something for them.

Helped them raise the money they need.

Yeah, well, the main thing is not to
noise this thing around. We don't want

many people finding out about this.

Hey, Doris, I don't want to be pussy,
but if I can help, I want to help. On

stage, off stage, wherever you think.

Thank you.

What are we talking about?

The benefit for Tim O 'Banion and Bertie
Whalen.

How did you find out about them?

Well, Montgomery mentioned it in
biology.

And Julie was talking in history about
raising some money for them. And

Well, everybody knows about it, Doris.

Absolutely everybody.

Everybody knows about what? Nothing.

Everybody knows nothing.

That's why we're here. In school. To
learn. And we're all here learning.

And I'm very, very proud to be here.

Doris, are you practicing to accept some
kind of award, sweetheart?

Michelle, honey, come on. I need you to
help me out with the freshman class

after school. And I'm going to bribe you
with some yogurt.

Dopey idea.

Adolescent.

So who better to pull it off than a
bunch of dopey adolescents?

According to these figures, financially,
we could make it work out.

$5 a ticket is not out of line for
something like this. And if we can get a

place that seats 500, 600 people, we'd
be home free.

Hey, the Knights of St. Anthony seats
about that. Maybe a little less.

A few people could stand.

The main thing is we can deliver the
act. Clearly enough people are

in this thing to make it work out.

There's something very wrong with all of
this.

It's running too smoothly.

Precisely. Why do you two always look
for trouble?

I mean, there's two guys who need help,
and everybody wants to help. I can get

the lodge for free.

Everything's folding right in, so why
look for problems? Why ignore them when

they're staring you right in the face?

Like what? Like when are we going to
start rehearsing? I mean, we have to do

things for school.

Do you think the teachers would refuse
to allow us to help two people like Mr.

'Banion and Mr. Whalen?

Any one of the teachers would do
anything to help people like that. Hold

Time out.

Leroy's right.

Bruno and I aren't as cynical as you may
think.

Look, the teachers would not try to stop
us. The teachers don't have a choice.

We tell them we want to do a benefit.
They say, who for?

We tell them Bertie Whalen. Then they
find out that Bertie Whalen is living

downstairs in the janitor's office.

Listen, they'd have no choice but to ask
them to leave.

That's the rules of the school, and they
have to live by them.

And he couldn't go back to Mr. O
'Banion's because of the dog.

If he tried to get a place of his own,
that eats up part of the savings they

wanted to use to get to Florida.

You know, it seems like more and more
rules are being made to keep people from

helping each other around here. And the
trains still do not run on time.

You're all being very logical and very
realistic.

And you're about to let logic and
reality talk you out of something you

want to see happen.

Hey, Mickey Rooney and Judy Garland did
not think logically when they were

putting on a show.

Doris, my mom doesn't have an attic full
of clothes and your pop doesn't have a

barn. The times have changed.

Besides, you were the one who said all
that stuff about the, uh, rules.

For once in your life, ignore me.

Look, I don't know which way this is all
gonna turn out, but either we build a

bridge or build a wall.

Those two old guys used to be us.

Someday we're gonna be them. And I'd
like to think there'll be someone there

help me when I get to the short end of
the string.

You know, someone who can't enough not
to let rules tell them what to do.

Phoenicia, Derek, would you please go in
there and put that ping -pong table up

against the wall for me, please?

Mr. Sharofsky.

Yes, good morning. How are you?

I'm fine, thank you. You left that ping
-pong table.

Whatever you call it, you left it in the
middle of the dance floor. Now, you

were supposed to store it up against the
wall. That was our agreement.

Not my fault, I'm sorry. Not your fault?

I played Mr. Crandall last night. Beat
him three straight.

21 -4, 21 -3, 21 -5.

He just stormed out after the last game.
I couldn't move the table by myself.

Well, Mr. Sharofsky, sometimes I come in
early to rehearse. Now, I can't move

that big thing by myself either. Now,
what are we going to do about that?

Do you happen to play?

No, I do not.

I thought possibly you could settle it.

Play two out of three. I do not play,
Mr.

Sharofsky.

Pity.

Tanisha, Derek, didn't I just ask you to
put that thing up?

Be another two or three minutes yet.

Hey, you want to know what happened to
that soap opera you like so much?

You bet.

Cindy died.

What?

Well, I told you yesterday she was in
intensive care.

Yeah, but you didn't make it sound like
she was going to die.

Well, she didn't look that sick, to tell
you the truth.

Well, couldn't you build up to it a
little? I mean, soften the blow?

Not just Cindy died.

She was a little attacked or something.

Okay.

Cindy entered a contest to see who could
hold their breath the longest.

She won, and she's still competing.

Buddy.

meet two friends of mine.

This is Leroy Johnson and this is Julie
Miller.

Leroy, Julie.

Hey, you're the dancer I've heard so
much about, right?

Yes, sir.

I watch him sometimes in the booth.

He's good.

Really? You bet.

Well, go ahead.

That's why you came, Leroy.

Go ahead.

Well, I don't want to bother you guys
any, but I'd like to ask you both a

question.

Yeah, yeah.

Sure, sure. Go ahead. What is it? Fire
away.

Well... I'm sort of like just getting
started in this dancing thing. And I was

wondering, have you guys ever regret
being dancers? I mean, ever, in all

years?

Never. Not once.

You sure?

Leroy, all dancing is is the ability to
move the way children imagine angels

move.

Now, who could ever regret being able to
do something like that?

It's being able to carve a statue out of
thin air.

And you're the statue and the sculptor.
all at the same time, and even if the

routine is always the same, that stature
you were making changes with each new

performance. You know something? At this
benefit, I'm going to dance my butt off

for you guys.

Don't do that.

You need the counterbalance on spins.

Isn't that right, Bertie? It sure is.
You should know.

Oh, that's good.

I just thought I'd come in here early to
rehearse. You don't mind if I do that,

do you?

No. Since you're always telling me to
rehearse, well, here I am, bright and

early, ready to rehearse, just like
you're always telling me to.

Leroy, why are you talking so loud?

I guess I'm talking loud because I'm so
full of energy, that's it.

You ever get up in the morning and
you're so full of energy that you just

wait till you get in here to rehearse?
Well, yes, sometimes, but I don't... Was

that pretty good?

Well, that was fierce.

What do you call that step in French?

Cabriolet grand jeté.

That's it. So I just did a pretty fierce
cabriolet grand jeté. How about that?

And I came in here early to do it this
morning.

Well, Leroy, I must say I am impressed.

Thank you, Miss Grant. You know what? I
think I'm going to keep doing stuff like

this until I get the hang of it.

Shoot, I thought I got rid of that cold.

I think I better ease up off these early
rehearsals, Miss Grant. The air's kind

of damp in here.

Leroy, you better do something about
that cough now.

Don't you worry, Miss Grant.

I will.

You can count on it.

What's this place?

Lady in my building overheard me talking
about this exercise kick you're on, and

she asked if I could set up a match
between the two of you.

That's her name, and she'll be calling
you.

Mrs. Peyton Smythe.

Sounds English.

It is. Her husband's with the trade
delegation at the U .N. Is Mrs. Peyton

Smythe a good sport? Because I'm likely
to beat her, you know.

Well, she said she played some ping
-pong when she was in school, but that

10 or 15 years ago, and she hasn't
played again since then.

Fine, have her give me a call by all
means.

I will do my best to keep it close.

You are so considerate.

Hi.

Who rained on your parade?

I picked up my dry cleaning this
morning. That was in the window.

It's about a benefit featuring
performers from the School of the Arts.

Well, if it's for some kind of charity.

I'm sure that's how the kids are looking
at it.

But I did some calling, some checking
around. Any of our students that put on

that stage Saturday night, they're out
of this school like a shot.

And no more than a thousand words and no
less than 500. And please, take some

care with your handwriting.

I mean, half the time I can't tell
whether I'm supposed to be reading an

or breaking some sort of secret code.

Schwartz, Miller, Johnson, Amatillo,
stick around.

Party slips? What for?

Because you're going to be late for your
next class.

We had some talking that we did.

About what?

About how you're going to cancel the so
-called benefit tomorrow night.

Well, I'm not going to be late for my
next class because I'm not listening to

any of that talk. If you have anything
to do with that benefit, you're out of

the school.

Period.

Why? For trying to help somebody?

No. For breaking a rule of the school.

A rule that's there for a reason.

and a rule that won't be changed or
appealed regardless of good motives.

What rule?

Mr. O 'Banion is an employee of the
Board of Education.

Students raising money for employees to
use for personal benefit is not allowed

under any circumstances.

It looks as if you're courting favor. It
looks as if it might be a bribe. Excuse

me, isn't it a little difficult to court
favor from a janitor? An employee is an

employee. The rule doesn't make any
differentiation between a supervisor and

janitor and a teacher. No employee
accepts money from any student for any

reason. And you think we'd get expelled?

I think there's a good chance of it,
yes.

Well, I don't have any homework this
weekend, because I'm doing the benefit.

Leroy, that's very noble. Look, don't
you know who Mr. O 'Banion and Bertie

Whelan are? Don't you know who they used
to be?

Look, they were very special people. You
can look it up. I know what Mr. O

'Banion used to do. And I don't want to
hear any of you mention the name of

Bertie Whalen because I don't want to
know anything about him or where he

happens to be living at the moment.
Because if I knew about it, I might have

do something about it. But since I don't
know about it, there's nothing I can

do. Do I make myself clear?

You really were talking to the people
tonight, St. Anthony, weren't you?

Yes. And you're in a box, right?

And if we were having this conversation,
I would have to tell you that I don't

see any way for you to do what you're
trying to do without jeopardizing your

place here.

But since we're really not having this
conversation, and you're not officially

telling us... Because I do not
officially know anything about Bertie

I wasn't slamming the door.

It sure sounded like it.

Well, I was slamming the situation. I
wasn't slamming you.

Thanks for clearing that up.

What are you doing?

What are you doing?

What do you think?

Thing of beauty, isn't she?

Where did me sign the papers on it last
night?

It's so banging.

She's gorgeous.

Really, never seen a better one. Thank
you.

Congratulations to you both.

Doris.

You're right. We're going to be late for
our next period.

Really a thing of beauty.

A definite ten.

Ah, beautiful.

Now if we could just keep up the
payment.

Doris. What are you, crazy?

You know what Miss Sherwood said.

There's a way.

There's always a way. There's got to be
a way.

All we got to do is find it.

May I help you?

Are you Mr. Sharofsky?

Yes.

I'm Mrs. Peyton Smythe.

I believe Lydia Grant mentioned me to
you.

You are Mrs. Peyton Smythe?

Yes. Hello.

Hello. Lovely coat.

Thank you.

Benjamin, I was just on my way home.

Hey, why don't I give you a hand setting
this up so you all can get started?

You told me she was English. No, you
told me her name sounded English, and I

told you her husband was with the trade
delegation at the U .N.

He is English.

He'd been doing the same job when he met
her a few years ago. Where did he meet

her?

Canton, China.

I'm told the Chinese are very good table
tennis players.

Do tell.

Well, you two kids have a good time, and
I can't wait to hear how everything

turns out.

Where's the pity?

If there weren't such a big turnout, we
could look the other way.

Ladies and

gentlemen, it's my pleasure to announce
the host of tonight's festivities, Mr.

Montgomery McNeil.

Some of you may not know what the
purpose of this evening is. Well, it's

to tell you.

We're here to honor courage tonight and
loyalty and love between two kindred

spirits.

The kind of love that accepts and
forgets.

Tonight, we have the great good fortune
to honor... Clumpy.

when Clumpy walked out here, but he
suffers from an arthritic hip.

And although it may look like he's
walking on four legs, he really has only

three to rely on.

Now, we're here to raise money to send
Clumpy to a warmer climate where he can

run in the fields and rest his bones.
But I think it would be a great

to just drop him off at Kennedy Airport
with a tourist ticket in his mouth.

Those two gentlemen have graciously
offered to be Clumpy's traveling

and his watchdog.

So it's clumpy we're honoring tonight.
That's what the money's for.

Not a teacher or a person.

Welcome to the first annual clumpy fund.

Making music has been my claim.

Day after day it can sound the same.

Look for the hook is the name of the
game.

Going for the fortunate fame.

And even when it is sounding good,
there's something that should be

Though I'm doing what I want to do, I've
really got to share it with you.

The music -

A few nights ago, this young man came up
to Tim and myself and asked us how we

felt about dancing.

Well, I forgot to mention one very
important thing to him about that when

asked us, and that is because of
dancing, we feel young.

Because as long as a dancer can tap his
toe and count up to four in the clear...

Not easy.

He'll be a dancer, and dancers are
always young.

Oh, there are some that are smooth and
some that are wrinkled, but

we're all young.

You know, there's one problem with being
a hoofer in situations like this.

We never have an ending to the act.

I mean, there's no such thing for guys
like Bertie and me.

No such thing as talking up to a big
finish.

We weren't taught that way.

Matter of fact, one time a student of
Ohio...

The Vanderbilt have asked us up for tea.

Here we go.

We would drive up the avenue, but we
haven't

got the price. We would skate up the
avenue, but

there isn't any ice.

We would ride on a bicycle, but we
haven't got

a bike.

Yes, we walk up the avenue. And we walk

up the avenue.