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1
00:00:01,532 --> 00:00:03,921
I love going to the farmers
market on Sundays.
2
00:00:03,956 --> 00:00:05,556
Yeah. It was fun.
3
00:00:05,591 --> 00:00:07,792
It was bullshit.
4
00:00:07,826 --> 00:00:10,494
Or it was bullshit. Either way.
5
00:00:10,529 --> 00:00:12,697
You can't just show up
with four dirty turnips
6
00:00:12,731 --> 00:00:14,799
from the backyard and expect to sell them.
7
00:00:14,833 --> 00:00:18,836
Dad, you need a permit to sell food there.
8
00:00:18,870 --> 00:00:21,606
I need bullshit!
9
00:00:21,640 --> 00:00:23,774
They let those inflatable
bouncy-house deathtraps
10
00:00:23,809 --> 00:00:26,077
operate freely, and I need
a permit to sell produce?
11
00:00:26,111 --> 00:00:28,479
Don't blame this on the bouncy people.
12
00:00:28,513 --> 00:00:31,015
The sign clearly said "kids only."
13
00:00:31,049 --> 00:00:32,750
Bouncy house ageism,
14
00:00:32,784 --> 00:00:35,052
petting zoos that make you
wash your hands first...
15
00:00:35,087 --> 00:00:36,520
I got to wash my hands?
16
00:00:36,555 --> 00:00:37,822
It's a goddamn goat!
17
00:00:39,391 --> 00:00:42,093
And crazy, arbitrary limits on the samples!
18
00:00:42,127 --> 00:00:45,029
Dad, you ate an entire apple,
and you didn't buy any.
19
00:00:45,063 --> 00:00:46,964
I tried it. Was not a fan.
20
00:00:48,033 --> 00:00:49,567
No more farmers markets.
21
00:00:49,601 --> 00:00:51,736
You know what I'm gonna
call them from now on?
22
00:00:51,770 --> 00:00:54,038
Bullshit markets?
23
00:00:54,072 --> 00:00:55,973
Goddamn right I'm call
them bullshit markets,
24
00:00:56,008 --> 00:00:57,808
'cause that's what they are... bullshit!
25
00:01:01,213 --> 00:01:03,547
Okay, everybody, look at me.
26
00:01:10,585 --> 00:01:15,592
Synced and corrected by OussLP
- www.addic7ed.com
27
00:01:16,895 --> 00:01:18,663
So, can you guys stay for a while,
28
00:01:18,697 --> 00:01:20,498
or do you have to leave right away?
29
00:01:20,532 --> 00:01:23,367
- Uh, we have to go.
- We'd love to stay.
30
00:01:23,402 --> 00:01:24,089
Perfect.
31
00:01:24,209 --> 00:01:25,936
I have some ham left over from last night.
32
00:01:25,971 --> 00:01:27,138
I'll make some sandwiches.
33
00:01:27,172 --> 00:01:29,940
We had that ham last week, hon.
34
00:01:29,975 --> 00:01:33,210
Well, I'm sure it's fine.
Ham doesn't really go bad.
35
00:01:34,713 --> 00:01:35,218
You know what?
36
00:01:35,338 --> 00:01:36,590
I'm not gonna take this fascist
37
00:01:36,710 --> 00:01:38,168
turnip-permit business sitting down.
38
00:01:38,288 --> 00:01:40,685
Last time I checked, this is still America.
39
00:01:40,719 --> 00:01:42,787
Oh, no.
40
00:01:42,821 --> 00:01:44,891
The last time he did his
"this is still America" speech,
41
00:01:45,011 --> 00:01:47,958
we got kicked out of Red Lobster.
42
00:01:47,993 --> 00:01:51,028
And nobody gets kicked out of Red Lobster.
43
00:01:51,063 --> 00:01:53,531
I'm gonna write them a
strongly worded letter.
44
00:01:53,565 --> 00:01:54,498
That ought to get their attention.
45
00:01:54,618 --> 00:01:58,002
Give them a little of what
I gave the Coca-Cola people.
46
00:01:58,036 --> 00:02:01,288
Dad didn't like New Coke,
so he wrote them a letter.
47
00:02:01,408 --> 00:02:03,676
Off the shelves in a year. You're welcome.
48
00:02:05,278 --> 00:02:06,545
Those farmers market clowns
49
00:02:06,580 --> 00:02:08,447
are gonna rue the day
they denied Gil Durnin.
50
00:02:09,649 --> 00:02:10,649
Want to help me write it, Oliver?
51
00:02:10,684 --> 00:02:12,718
Um, I can't.
52
00:02:12,752 --> 00:02:14,854
I promised Jan I would help
her with the sandwiches.
53
00:02:14,888 --> 00:02:19,191
You know, help her not
make them from old ham.
54
00:02:19,226 --> 00:02:21,193
Enzo, want to help me write a letter?
55
00:02:21,228 --> 00:02:23,462
Sure, Gil. Who are we mad at today?
56
00:02:23,497 --> 00:02:24,964
The farmers market people.
57
00:02:24,998 --> 00:02:26,866
Of course. I hate those places.
58
00:02:26,900 --> 00:02:29,201
Everyone always thinks I work there.
59
00:02:29,236 --> 00:02:31,504
Let's go get my laptop.
60
00:02:31,538 --> 00:02:33,772
You sure you want turkey?
61
00:02:33,807 --> 00:02:38,777
Uh, yeah. Just not really
in a "ham" mood, I guess.
62
00:02:38,812 --> 00:02:40,513
Oh, Oli, would you mind bringing that bag
63
00:02:40,547 --> 00:02:41,580
of potatoes to the pantry?
64
00:02:41,615 --> 00:02:42,915
Yeah, sure.
65
00:02:51,691 --> 00:02:54,627
Hey, bro.
66
00:02:54,661 --> 00:02:56,028
Hey, where'd you get that jacket?
67
00:02:56,062 --> 00:02:57,863
Found it in the basement.
68
00:02:57,898 --> 00:02:58,931
Where in the basement?
69
00:02:58,965 --> 00:03:00,266
In a box.
70
00:03:00,300 --> 00:03:01,667
Yeah, in my box
71
00:03:01,701 --> 00:03:04,770
that says "Kelli's stuff."
72
00:03:04,804 --> 00:03:08,474
Yeah, it doesn't say that anymore.
73
00:03:08,508 --> 00:03:10,509
That's my favorite jean jacket.
74
00:03:10,544 --> 00:03:11,944
If it's your favorite, then why has it been
75
00:03:11,978 --> 00:03:13,612
in Mom and Dad's basement
the last 10 years?
76
00:03:13,647 --> 00:03:15,781
This is so like you...
77
00:03:15,815 --> 00:03:18,551
taking stuff that isn't
yours without asking,
78
00:03:18,585 --> 00:03:21,287
like you did with my Discman
and my Silver Moon boots,
79
00:03:21,321 --> 00:03:24,523
which you knew I needed
for my "Tron" costume.
80
00:03:24,558 --> 00:03:27,459
Maybe you need to get
better at letting things go.
81
00:03:27,494 --> 00:03:29,562
It doesn't even matter. It's mine.
82
00:03:29,596 --> 00:03:30,496
Give it back.
83
00:03:30,530 --> 00:03:32,264
Fine.
84
00:03:32,299 --> 00:03:36,435
If that basement door is
locked, you are dead!
85
00:03:38,939 --> 00:03:41,674
God damn it!
86
00:03:41,708 --> 00:03:43,542
What the hell, Blake?!
87
00:03:43,577 --> 00:03:46,045
Oliver, you need to help
me get out of here.
88
00:03:46,079 --> 00:03:47,813
But first, do you want to tell me
89
00:03:47,847 --> 00:03:49,682
what my little brother is doing naked
90
00:03:49,716 --> 00:03:51,317
in my wife's parents' pantry?!
91
00:03:51,351 --> 00:03:52,785
Okay.
92
00:03:52,819 --> 00:03:54,720
Uh, well, Dani and I were
having sex in the kitchen,
93
00:03:54,754 --> 00:03:56,322
and we heard the door
open, we both panicked,
94
00:03:56,356 --> 00:03:57,623
and I ran in here.
95
00:03:57,657 --> 00:03:59,425
What were you thinking hiding in here?
96
00:03:59,459 --> 00:04:00,993
I guess I was thinking, if I didn't,
97
00:04:01,027 --> 00:04:02,795
someone would see me naked!
98
00:04:02,829 --> 00:04:04,363
Wait a second.
99
00:04:04,397 --> 00:04:06,932
If you hid in here, then
where did Dani hide?
100
00:04:06,967 --> 00:04:08,901
And is she still naked?
101
00:04:08,935 --> 00:04:11,070
She could be anywhere. And yes.
102
00:04:11,104 --> 00:04:12,871
Blake!
103
00:04:12,906 --> 00:04:14,974
My mother-in-law is right on
the other side of this door
104
00:04:15,008 --> 00:04:16,542
making possibly toxic sandwiches.
105
00:04:17,744 --> 00:04:19,378
And Gil is in the next room
106
00:04:19,412 --> 00:04:21,580
trying to take down a friendly
neighborhood co-op!
107
00:04:21,615 --> 00:04:23,315
God, this is a nightmare!
108
00:04:23,350 --> 00:04:24,450
I know!
109
00:04:24,484 --> 00:04:25,584
And not only that,
110
00:04:25,619 --> 00:04:26,819
this pantry's packed with carbs!
111
00:04:28,088 --> 00:04:30,322
Thanks for typing, Enzo.
112
00:04:30,357 --> 00:04:31,590
For this to work,
113
00:04:31,625 --> 00:04:33,926
I really need to be up, moving,
114
00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:35,628
gesticulating.
115
00:04:38,365 --> 00:04:39,732
My name is Gil Durnin.
116
00:04:39,766 --> 00:04:42,635
As a teenager, they called
me "Turnin' Durnin."
117
00:04:42,669 --> 00:04:44,770
But that's not why I'm writing you today.
118
00:04:44,804 --> 00:04:46,005
I'm particularly concerned
119
00:04:46,039 --> 00:04:47,773
about some of the new policies in place
120
00:04:47,807 --> 00:04:49,441
at the 47th street farmers market,
121
00:04:49,476 --> 00:04:53,045
specifically the fascist
sales-permit requirement.
122
00:04:53,079 --> 00:04:55,514
Last time I checked, this was America,
123
00:04:55,548 --> 00:04:57,616
not Soviet Russia.
124
00:04:57,651 --> 00:04:58,817
So you listen to me.
125
00:04:58,852 --> 00:05:00,052
May I interrupt for one moment?
126
00:05:00,086 --> 00:05:01,787
Do you spell "Gil" with one "I" or two?
127
00:05:08,728 --> 00:05:09,928
What are you doing?
128
00:05:09,963 --> 00:05:11,964
I thought you were worried about carbs.
129
00:05:11,998 --> 00:05:14,600
It's called stress eating.
I'm freaking out!
130
00:05:16,002 --> 00:05:17,703
Gil cannot find out I'm here.
131
00:05:17,737 --> 00:05:18,871
That guy hates me.
132
00:05:18,905 --> 00:05:20,372
Well, yeah. Can you blame him?
133
00:05:20,407 --> 00:05:21,640
The last time you guys saw each other,
134
00:05:21,675 --> 00:05:22,641
it didn't go that well.
135
00:05:24,177 --> 00:05:27,780
Hey, Gil, I think that's
Oliver's brother Blake.
136
00:05:27,814 --> 00:05:29,048
Oh, it is.
137
00:05:29,082 --> 00:05:31,116
I'm gonna play a little trick on him.
138
00:05:35,689 --> 00:05:36,789
Get off!
139
00:05:36,823 --> 00:05:37,723
Ohh! Ohh!
140
00:05:37,757 --> 00:05:39,391
Ohh! Mr. Durnin?
141
00:05:39,426 --> 00:05:40,459
What
142
00:05:43,093 --> 00:05:44,460
Yeah, if Gil sees you in his house,
143
00:05:44,494 --> 00:05:45,661
he's gonna go insane.
144
00:05:45,695 --> 00:05:46,762
Then he's gonna call another one
145
00:05:46,796 --> 00:05:47,912
of his stupid "share squares"
146
00:05:48,032 --> 00:05:49,901
and make us all talk about
our feelings for three hours,
147
00:05:50,021 --> 00:05:51,567
then I'm gonna go insane.
148
00:05:51,601 --> 00:05:52,801
We got to get you out of here.
149
00:05:52,836 --> 00:05:54,103
Where are your clothes?
150
00:05:54,137 --> 00:05:56,372
Uh... Some are in Dani's room,
151
00:05:56,406 --> 00:05:58,841
some are in the living room, garage.
152
00:05:58,875 --> 00:06:00,509
Ooh, which reminds me.
153
00:06:00,543 --> 00:06:04,446
Gil's gonna need a new bicycle pump.
154
00:06:04,481 --> 00:06:07,049
Ew.
155
00:06:07,083 --> 00:06:11,286
Why don't you just have sex
in a bed like normal people?
156
00:06:11,321 --> 00:06:12,755
'Cause we're not married.
157
00:06:14,157 --> 00:06:15,391
Now, can you go find me my clothes,
158
00:06:15,425 --> 00:06:16,625
'cause I need to get out of here!
159
00:06:21,231 --> 00:06:22,765
Oliver.
160
00:06:22,799 --> 00:06:24,299
Can I get your thoughts
on my letter so far?
161
00:06:24,334 --> 00:06:27,274
Um, I'm gonna go out on a limb
162
00:06:27,394 --> 00:06:29,638
and say you're using
way too many "goddamn's."
163
00:06:32,418 --> 00:06:34,119
Hey, is that mine?
164
00:06:34,153 --> 00:06:36,054
No. It's mine.
165
00:06:36,088 --> 00:06:38,089
I found it.
166
00:06:38,124 --> 00:06:39,491
You can't just take that.
167
00:06:39,525 --> 00:06:41,726
Sure I can. It's what we do now, right?
168
00:06:41,761 --> 00:06:44,095
Find stuff that isn't
ours and just take it?
169
00:06:44,130 --> 00:06:49,067
You weren't using it, and now it's mine.
170
00:06:49,101 --> 00:06:51,503
A tablet is way different than a jacket.
171
00:06:51,537 --> 00:06:53,872
Dad, will you please tell Kelli
172
00:06:53,906 --> 00:06:56,007
that she is being a sociopath?
173
00:06:56,042 --> 00:06:57,976
I'm in the middle of something, sweetie.
174
00:06:58,010 --> 00:06:59,444
But "sociopath" I like that.
175
00:06:59,478 --> 00:07:01,980
Let's put that somewhere.
176
00:07:02,014 --> 00:07:04,311
Oh, maybe here, after
"Old Macdonald had a farm,
177
00:07:04,431 --> 00:07:05,203
"and he couldn't sell anything
178
00:07:05,323 --> 00:07:08,319
because he didn't have a goddamn permit."
179
00:07:08,354 --> 00:07:10,121
So, you're really not gonna give that back?
180
00:07:10,156 --> 00:07:12,323
Never.
181
00:07:12,358 --> 00:07:14,059
Oh, you are so going down.
182
00:07:14,093 --> 00:07:16,161
Hey.
183
00:07:16,195 --> 00:07:17,914
- You got to help me with something.
- I need your help with something.
184
00:07:18,034 --> 00:07:19,926
- I'm dealing with a huge Gil problem.
- I can't. I got a big Shawni thing.
185
00:07:20,046 --> 00:07:21,332
- Okay, talk later.
- Let's talk later.
186
00:07:21,367 --> 00:07:23,101
- Love you.
- Love you.
187
00:07:26,172 --> 00:07:28,973
Hey, uh, what are you doing there, Jan?
188
00:07:29,008 --> 00:07:30,909
Oh, just making some muffins
189
00:07:30,943 --> 00:07:34,012
to disarm the Gil bomb
going off in the living room.
190
00:07:35,948 --> 00:07:36,659
It's his favorite recipe.
191
00:07:36,779 --> 00:07:39,918
You have to stir it constantly
for 20 minutes.
192
00:07:39,952 --> 00:07:43,054
Seriously?
193
00:07:43,089 --> 00:07:44,989
Oh, honey, would you mind
grabbing me my phone?
194
00:07:45,024 --> 00:07:46,191
It's over there on the desk.
195
00:07:46,225 --> 00:07:47,325
Sure.
196
00:08:06,265 --> 00:08:07,965
Okay, I found Dani.
197
00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:09,092
She was on the patio.
198
00:08:09,212 --> 00:08:10,702
I got her some clothes.
Here's some for you.
199
00:08:10,736 --> 00:08:12,070
Uh, these aren't my clothes.
200
00:08:12,104 --> 00:08:13,137
Yeah, I know.
201
00:08:13,172 --> 00:08:14,339
All I could find was one sock
202
00:08:14,373 --> 00:08:16,174
and a t-shirt with the chest ripped open.
203
00:08:16,208 --> 00:08:18,576
Oh, yeah.
204
00:08:18,610 --> 00:08:19,977
So I grabbed you something of Gil's.
205
00:08:20,012 --> 00:08:21,346
Now, Dani's gonna come downstairs
206
00:08:21,380 --> 00:08:22,647
and help me distract Jan
207
00:08:22,681 --> 00:08:24,248
so you can sneak out the back.
208
00:08:24,283 --> 00:08:26,050
So, we need a code word, okay?
209
00:08:26,085 --> 00:08:28,052
Something I can say so you
know when the coast is clear.
210
00:08:28,087 --> 00:08:30,121
"Cougar."
211
00:08:30,155 --> 00:08:31,789
What? No.
212
00:08:31,824 --> 00:08:34,125
How am supposed to work
"cougar" into a conversation?
213
00:08:34,159 --> 00:08:37,228
I don't know. It's a pretty cool code word.
214
00:08:37,262 --> 00:08:38,863
"Lasagna."
215
00:08:38,897 --> 00:08:41,699
"Alligator"?
216
00:08:41,734 --> 00:08:43,101
Why are you doing this?
217
00:08:43,135 --> 00:08:45,703
When I say lasagna, you get out, okay?
218
00:08:45,738 --> 00:08:48,306
Okay. When I hear "lasagna"
or "alligator," then I...
219
00:08:48,340 --> 00:08:50,975
no! Not "alligator." "Lasagna."
220
00:08:51,009 --> 00:08:53,978
Wait, so if you say
"alligator," I stay here?
221
00:08:54,012 --> 00:08:57,281
I'm not gonna say... when I say "lasagna,"
222
00:08:57,316 --> 00:08:59,050
you go out the back. That's it.
223
00:08:59,084 --> 00:09:00,184
You got it?
224
00:09:00,219 --> 00:09:01,185
Got it.
225
00:09:01,220 --> 00:09:02,320
Okay.
226
00:09:02,354 --> 00:09:04,255
"I think I saw a cougar outside."
227
00:09:04,289 --> 00:09:05,656
What?
228
00:09:05,691 --> 00:09:07,358
That's how you could work "cougar"
229
00:09:07,393 --> 00:09:08,626
into a conversation.
230
00:09:08,660 --> 00:09:10,294
Would you just...
231
00:09:10,329 --> 00:09:12,063
You're an idiot!
232
00:09:13,165 --> 00:09:18,302
Man, that pantry is deep.
233
00:09:18,337 --> 00:09:21,038
Need a map just to find
your way out of that thing.
234
00:09:22,741 --> 00:09:24,709
Hey, do you want me to stir for a while?
235
00:09:24,743 --> 00:09:28,246
You know, you could go in
the other room or whatever.
236
00:09:28,280 --> 00:09:29,781
No, thanks, Oliver.
237
00:09:29,815 --> 00:09:30,948
I love stirring.
238
00:09:30,983 --> 00:09:32,383
I could stir forever.
239
00:09:33,919 --> 00:09:35,153
Hey, Mom.
240
00:09:35,187 --> 00:09:38,156
Oh, hi, Oliver.
241
00:09:38,190 --> 00:09:40,925
Hey, Dani. Long time, no see.
242
00:09:40,959 --> 00:09:42,226
Mm-hmm.
243
00:09:42,261 --> 00:09:45,296
Mom, do you like my dress?
244
00:09:45,330 --> 00:09:47,432
I do.
245
00:09:47,466 --> 00:09:50,802
Look real close, Jan.
Really decide if you like it.
246
00:09:52,070 --> 00:09:53,237
Lasagna.
247
00:09:53,272 --> 00:09:54,772
What?
248
00:09:54,807 --> 00:09:57,475
Oh, um, I was thinking, for dinner tonight,
249
00:09:57,509 --> 00:09:59,710
maybe we could have lasagna.
250
00:09:59,745 --> 00:10:01,824
Oh. Okay.
251
00:10:01,944 --> 00:10:03,214
Well, I guess I could...
252
00:10:03,248 --> 00:10:06,050
Alligator! Cougar!
253
00:10:06,084 --> 00:10:09,320
We don't usually keep
exotic meats in the house.
254
00:10:11,890 --> 00:10:13,391
Aah!
255
00:10:13,425 --> 00:10:14,926
Blake!
256
00:10:14,960 --> 00:10:16,994
Baby, are you okay?
257
00:10:17,029 --> 00:10:18,062
Blake?
258
00:10:18,096 --> 00:10:19,897
What is going on here?
259
00:10:19,932 --> 00:10:23,768
That's why you were in
the pantry for so long.
260
00:10:23,802 --> 00:10:25,770
Why are you wearing Gil's clothes?
261
00:10:25,804 --> 00:10:27,438
Oh, that's just because, uh...
262
00:10:27,473 --> 00:10:29,440
oh, my God, you two are dating.
263
00:10:29,475 --> 00:10:31,809
No, Jan. No.
264
00:10:31,844 --> 00:10:34,011
I love it!
265
00:10:34,046 --> 00:10:35,112
You do?
266
00:10:35,147 --> 00:10:36,414
Are you kidding?
267
00:10:36,448 --> 00:10:38,783
This is the most wonderful
news in the world.
268
00:10:38,817 --> 00:10:42,553
It is! We're in love, I think.
269
00:10:42,588 --> 00:10:47,825
Can you imagine two Weston
princes in the family?
270
00:10:47,860 --> 00:10:49,093
Do you think, if they get married,
271
00:10:49,127 --> 00:10:50,495
the wedding will be at your country club
272
00:10:50,529 --> 00:10:51,596
like yours and Kelli's was?
273
00:10:51,630 --> 00:10:53,531
So fancy!
274
00:10:53,565 --> 00:10:55,833
Cloth towels in the bathrooms...
275
00:10:55,868 --> 00:10:57,101
I stole six of them.
276
00:10:58,504 --> 00:11:00,071
Okay, before they get married,
277
00:11:00,105 --> 00:11:01,472
we have to get him out of here.
278
00:11:01,507 --> 00:11:03,007
Gil can never know about this.
279
00:11:03,041 --> 00:11:04,342
Oh, but he will.
280
00:11:04,376 --> 00:11:06,777
Gil and I don't keep
secrets from each other.
281
00:11:06,812 --> 00:11:08,045
I have to tell him.
282
00:11:08,080 --> 00:11:09,447
But Dad hates Blake.
283
00:11:09,481 --> 00:11:11,916
Remember, he said if
he ever sees him again,
284
00:11:11,950 --> 00:11:14,385
he's gonna punch him in the heart.
285
00:11:14,419 --> 00:11:16,854
Ah, Gil's always saying he's
gonna punch people in the heart.
286
00:11:16,889 --> 00:11:18,823
I can smooth things over between you two.
287
00:11:18,857 --> 00:11:21,025
But before we tell him
that you two are dating,
288
00:11:21,059 --> 00:11:24,495
we need him to forgive Blake
for the movie-theater incident.
289
00:11:24,530 --> 00:11:26,898
I have a plan that I think will work.
290
00:11:26,932 --> 00:11:29,834
Does it have a name?
291
00:11:29,868 --> 00:11:31,102
Does what have a name, honey?
292
00:11:31,136 --> 00:11:32,603
The plan. It should have a cool name,
293
00:11:32,638 --> 00:11:35,907
like, "Operation Cougar" or something.
294
00:11:35,941 --> 00:11:38,042
Enough with the cougar, man.
295
00:11:38,076 --> 00:11:40,878
It's called "Operation Jan," guys.
296
00:11:40,913 --> 00:11:42,914
And here's... "Jantastic."
297
00:11:44,383 --> 00:11:45,616
Gil's never gonna forgive you
298
00:11:45,651 --> 00:11:46,828
if you're wearing his sweatsuit,
299
00:11:46,948 --> 00:11:49,020
so you and Oliver need to sw... Janbalaya?
300
00:11:50,556 --> 00:11:53,991
You know who shouldn't
have been issued a permit?
301
00:11:54,026 --> 00:11:55,993
That smoothie guy.
302
00:11:56,028 --> 00:12:00,531
That thing went through me
like a kid in a water slide.
303
00:12:00,566 --> 00:12:02,233
Now, where were we?
304
00:12:02,267 --> 00:12:03,522
Uh, the last thing you said
305
00:12:03,642 --> 00:12:06,971
was "goddamn corporate bloodsucker."
306
00:12:07,005 --> 00:12:08,839
Oh, no.
307
00:12:08,874 --> 00:12:10,174
No!
308
00:12:10,208 --> 00:12:13,244
Did you seriously put on
my cheerleading uniform?
309
00:12:13,278 --> 00:12:15,846
I'm Kelli. I'm on the cheerleading squad.
310
00:12:15,881 --> 00:12:18,215
Hoo-rah!
311
00:12:18,250 --> 00:12:19,917
You have no right to wear that.
312
00:12:19,952 --> 00:12:22,386
Only girls who were voted
onto the squad by the school
313
00:12:22,421 --> 00:12:24,322
get the honor of wearing that uniform.
314
00:12:24,356 --> 00:12:26,657
You take that off right now!
315
00:12:26,692 --> 00:12:29,994
This is serious! You have crossed a line!
316
00:12:30,028 --> 00:12:31,896
I'm Kelli. I'm so popular.
317
00:12:31,930 --> 00:12:35,132
Everybody voted for me,
except for my little sister.
318
00:12:35,167 --> 00:12:37,234
I cheered at all the games
319
00:12:37,269 --> 00:12:39,203
while she smoked weed under the bleachers.
320
00:12:39,237 --> 00:12:42,106
I blew the entire football team.
321
00:12:42,140 --> 00:12:44,942
Right.
322
00:12:44,977 --> 00:12:48,312
Like a football team only has five guys.
323
00:12:48,347 --> 00:12:51,048
And then I got married
to my college sweetheart,
324
00:12:51,083 --> 00:12:53,050
and we had this big, fancy wedding.
325
00:12:53,085 --> 00:12:54,919
You take off my uniform right now.
326
00:12:54,953 --> 00:12:56,153
No.
327
00:12:56,188 --> 00:12:57,421
That uniform is sacred!
328
00:12:57,456 --> 00:12:59,290
- You take it off!
- Get off me, you psycho!
329
00:12:59,324 --> 00:13:00,992
"Psycho"... that's good. Put that down.
330
00:13:03,395 --> 00:13:05,296
Now I got my tablet. I got everything.
331
00:13:05,330 --> 00:13:08,032
Go, Shawni!
332
00:13:10,102 --> 00:13:11,435
If I knew that costume was down there,
333
00:13:11,470 --> 00:13:13,437
I'd have had her put it on a long time ago.
334
00:13:15,173 --> 00:13:17,274
Oh, I'll get it.
335
00:13:17,309 --> 00:13:20,177
Oliver, why are you wearing my sweatsuit?
336
00:13:20,212 --> 00:13:23,147
Um, 'cause Jan said I could.
337
00:13:23,181 --> 00:13:25,316
Yeah, I'm planning on
doing some sweating later,
338
00:13:25,350 --> 00:13:27,618
and... So I wanted a suit,
339
00:13:27,653 --> 00:13:31,155
because... I like to look official.
340
00:13:32,524 --> 00:13:36,360
Hello, Mrs. Durnin. Is your husband here?
341
00:13:36,395 --> 00:13:38,429
Holy hell. It's that Weston boy...
342
00:13:39,665 --> 00:13:41,966
the one who partially
deviated my septum.
343
00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:44,135
Enzo, get him.
Punch him in the heart.
344
00:13:45,270 --> 00:13:46,704
What are you doing here, Blake?
345
00:13:46,738 --> 00:13:48,305
Well, I-I wanted to apologize
346
00:13:48,340 --> 00:13:50,241
for what happened at the movie theater.
347
00:13:50,275 --> 00:13:54,378
And as a token of my
remorse, I brought this gift.
348
00:13:56,548 --> 00:13:59,083
Is this an authentic flint arrowhead?
349
00:13:59,785 --> 00:14:02,319
Yes, it is.
350
00:14:02,354 --> 00:14:03,621
How did you know I collect these?
351
00:14:04,489 --> 00:14:07,191
Uh, Oliver told me.
352
00:14:07,225 --> 00:14:09,760
It's beautiful. Where did you get it?
353
00:14:11,763 --> 00:14:13,164
Andy's house.
354
00:14:14,132 --> 00:14:15,633
I should probably look this Andy up.
355
00:14:15,667 --> 00:14:17,268
I bet he has quite a collection.
356
00:14:17,302 --> 00:14:18,369
What's his last name?
357
00:14:18,403 --> 00:14:20,271
Cougar.
358
00:14:21,540 --> 00:14:25,109
He's a Native American.
359
00:14:25,143 --> 00:14:27,511
Wow. Thank you, Blake.
This is very special.
360
00:14:27,546 --> 00:14:30,181
Oh, that is pretty nice, Gil.
361
00:14:30,215 --> 00:14:32,983
Don't you think it's time you forgave Blake
362
00:14:33,018 --> 00:14:35,720
for that silly little
movie-theater incident?
363
00:14:35,754 --> 00:14:39,290
All right, but you got to
get me two more of these...
364
00:14:39,324 --> 00:14:40,691
one of them a necklace.
365
00:14:40,726 --> 00:14:41,692
Done.
366
00:14:41,727 --> 00:14:42,727
Made of real leather,
367
00:14:42,761 --> 00:14:45,096
not that pleather bullshit.
368
00:14:45,130 --> 00:14:46,497
Turns my neck green.
369
00:14:49,401 --> 00:14:50,601
All right!
370
00:14:50,635 --> 00:14:51,736
I can't believe that worked!
371
00:14:51,770 --> 00:14:54,105
I know! What a rush!
372
00:14:55,440 --> 00:14:57,541
Ow.
373
00:14:57,576 --> 00:15:00,444
Wow. We do that now. Okay.
374
00:15:00,479 --> 00:15:02,996
All right, let's talk step two...
375
00:15:03,116 --> 00:15:05,250
telling Gil that Blake is Dani's boyfriend.
376
00:15:05,284 --> 00:15:08,019
It'll be complicated, take
a lot of time and patience,
377
00:15:08,054 --> 00:15:09,788
but if we manage Gil just right,
378
00:15:09,822 --> 00:15:12,190
eventually he will welcome
Blake with open arms.
379
00:15:12,225 --> 00:15:13,725
Okay, cool.
380
00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:15,060
So we should tell Blake
the rest of the plan
381
00:15:15,094 --> 00:15:16,361
- so he doesn't screw it...
- What?!
382
00:15:16,396 --> 00:15:18,663
You're dating my daughter? I forbid it!
383
00:15:18,698 --> 00:15:21,299
Now get out of my house before
I punch you in the heart!
384
00:15:33,845 --> 00:15:35,479
He picked up the knee chair.
385
00:15:35,513 --> 00:15:37,414
He actually picked it up.
386
00:15:37,448 --> 00:15:38,749
Yeah, I know. We saw.
387
00:15:38,783 --> 00:15:40,383
What the hell happened out there, Blake?
388
00:15:40,418 --> 00:15:42,018
It was all going so well,
389
00:15:42,053 --> 00:15:44,554
I thought I could just tell him.
390
00:15:44,589 --> 00:15:46,957
Aw, Blake, I don't know
if even I can fix this.
391
00:15:46,991 --> 00:15:48,825
Now this whole thing is janarchy!
392
00:15:50,828 --> 00:15:52,696
I might be able to fix it.
393
00:15:52,730 --> 00:15:54,698
I can't believe I'm about to say this,
394
00:15:54,732 --> 00:15:58,602
but... I'm calling a share square.
395
00:15:58,636 --> 00:16:01,004
If you're gonna go around
picking up chairs, Gil,
396
00:16:01,038 --> 00:16:02,672
- you need to lift with your legs.
- I know.
397
00:16:03,574 --> 00:16:06,977
I'm going on record that this
is not an official share square.
398
00:16:07,011 --> 00:16:08,478
Share square is my thing.
399
00:16:08,513 --> 00:16:09,946
I lead them.
400
00:16:09,981 --> 00:16:12,282
Oliver doesn't have the
training to lead a share square.
401
00:16:12,316 --> 00:16:14,751
Feelings circle? Sure.
402
00:16:14,786 --> 00:16:16,620
Talk triangle? Perhaps.
403
00:16:16,654 --> 00:16:19,790
But a share square? No way.
404
00:16:19,824 --> 00:16:21,805
Well, we need to do this, Gil, okay?
405
00:16:21,925 --> 00:16:23,159
Kelli and Shawni are fighting,
406
00:16:23,193 --> 00:16:24,394
you're mad at Blake,
407
00:16:24,428 --> 00:16:26,229
I'm mad at Blake for screwing up the plan.
408
00:16:26,263 --> 00:16:30,300
Ooh, don't forget about Gil and
the goddamn farmers market.
409
00:16:30,334 --> 00:16:32,001
Right, yes, okay.
410
00:16:32,036 --> 00:16:33,236
So let's do this.
411
00:16:33,270 --> 00:16:35,271
Feelings. Kelli, why don't you start?
412
00:16:35,306 --> 00:16:37,907
Tell us what's going on
between you and Shawni.
413
00:16:37,941 --> 00:16:40,143
I love that he thinks he can
start a share square like that.
414
00:16:40,177 --> 00:16:44,113
Hilarious. Totally against protocol.
415
00:16:44,148 --> 00:16:47,394
Okay. Shawni stole my jean jacket,
416
00:16:47,514 --> 00:16:50,115
and then put on my cheerleading uniform
417
00:16:50,150 --> 00:16:51,784
just because she knew it would hurt me,
418
00:16:51,904 --> 00:16:54,117
and indirectly Sloane, Pippa, Fiona,
419
00:16:54,237 --> 00:16:55,146
and every other member
420
00:16:55,266 --> 00:16:57,467
of the Roosevelt High
School Cheerleading Squad.
421
00:16:57,501 --> 00:17:00,203
Shawni has no respect
for other people's things.
422
00:17:00,237 --> 00:17:03,173
She thinks she can do whatever
she wants, but she can't.
423
00:17:03,207 --> 00:17:05,775
Okay. Nice.
424
00:17:05,810 --> 00:17:07,110
Good sharing.
425
00:17:07,144 --> 00:17:08,478
"Good sharing."
426
00:17:08,512 --> 00:17:10,447
You never say "good
sharing" in a share square.
427
00:17:10,481 --> 00:17:13,717
Who is this guy?!
428
00:17:13,751 --> 00:17:15,652
Okay. Shawni, why don't you talk
429
00:17:15,686 --> 00:17:17,787
about why the jacket
is so important to you?
430
00:17:17,822 --> 00:17:19,823
Did you ever think that maybe
I wanted to wear the jacket
431
00:17:19,857 --> 00:17:21,257
because you're my older sister,
432
00:17:21,292 --> 00:17:22,592
and everything you do turns out great
433
00:17:22,627 --> 00:17:24,194
and everything I do turns to horseshit?
434
00:17:25,596 --> 00:17:27,297
Or maybe I wanted to wear it
435
00:17:27,331 --> 00:17:29,366
'cause I want to feel like you
or look like you for a minute.
436
00:17:29,400 --> 00:17:30,467
You ever think about that?
437
00:17:30,501 --> 00:17:31,868
You can have your dumb jacket back.
438
00:17:34,205 --> 00:17:35,939
Shit.
439
00:17:37,475 --> 00:17:39,809
Um, guys, you're not supposed
to leave the share square.
440
00:17:39,844 --> 00:17:41,511
This is a terrible share square.
441
00:17:42,980 --> 00:17:44,748
You already lost two people.
442
00:17:44,782 --> 00:17:47,317
You're in way over your head, son.
443
00:17:47,351 --> 00:17:48,551
Why don't you go, Gil?
444
00:17:48,586 --> 00:17:49,919
Why don't you tell us
445
00:17:49,954 --> 00:17:52,422
why you don't want Dani dating Blake?
446
00:17:52,456 --> 00:17:54,391
Because of what happened at the theater.
447
00:17:54,425 --> 00:17:57,227
You were there. He tried to kill me.
448
00:17:57,261 --> 00:18:00,597
No, he didn't, and you
already forgave him for that.
449
00:18:00,631 --> 00:18:01,931
Just because I forgave someone
450
00:18:01,966 --> 00:18:03,800
doesn't mean I want
them dating my daughter.
451
00:18:03,834 --> 00:18:06,469
What if she tries to hug
him and he punches her?
452
00:18:06,504 --> 00:18:08,204
Now Dani's dead!
453
00:18:09,840 --> 00:18:11,307
And you know who killed her?
454
00:18:11,342 --> 00:18:12,676
You, with all your meddling questions!
455
00:18:12,710 --> 00:18:16,446
I'm dead? What?!
456
00:18:16,480 --> 00:18:18,448
Gil, it's a share square.
457
00:18:18,482 --> 00:18:20,316
You have to be honest.
458
00:18:20,351 --> 00:18:22,452
Tell us your real feelings.
459
00:18:24,422 --> 00:18:26,423
No. I don't want to say my feelings.
460
00:18:26,457 --> 00:18:27,657
You know why?
461
00:18:27,692 --> 00:18:29,459
Because this isn't a real share square.
462
00:18:32,930 --> 00:18:35,498
Guys, you're not supposed
to leave the share square.
463
00:18:37,268 --> 00:18:40,737
Guys, you're not supposed
to leave the share square!
464
00:18:40,771 --> 00:18:43,807
What's really going on, Gil?
465
00:18:43,841 --> 00:18:45,909
I don't want to lose Dani.
466
00:18:45,943 --> 00:18:47,844
What are you talking about?
467
00:18:47,878 --> 00:18:51,514
The last time a Weston boy
dated one of my daughters,
468
00:18:51,549 --> 00:18:53,750
she married him and I lost her.
469
00:18:53,784 --> 00:18:56,386
Dani's my baby, my last one.
470
00:18:56,420 --> 00:18:59,022
I'm not ready to let her go yet.
471
00:18:59,056 --> 00:19:00,657
Aww, honey.
472
00:19:00,691 --> 00:19:02,659
You're not losing anyone.
473
00:19:02,693 --> 00:19:05,261
She'll always be your baby.
474
00:19:05,296 --> 00:19:06,696
But Dani's an adult now.
475
00:19:06,731 --> 00:19:09,933
If she wants to date Blake
and move out and marry him
476
00:19:09,967 --> 00:19:13,436
and get us into the country
club, that's her decision.
477
00:19:16,006 --> 00:19:20,610
Shawni, I'm so sorry.
478
00:19:20,644 --> 00:19:22,979
I had no idea you felt that way.
479
00:19:23,013 --> 00:19:26,416
Look, I don't know why I was
such a bitch about the jacket.
480
00:19:26,899 --> 00:19:30,368
I guess it's just so easy to fall
in to how we were as kids.
481
00:19:30,488 --> 00:19:33,823
I'm sorry. I want you to have the jacket.
482
00:19:33,858 --> 00:19:35,458
Really? Forever?
483
00:19:35,493 --> 00:19:37,393
Of course. I love you.
484
00:19:37,428 --> 00:19:39,329
I love you, too.
485
00:19:39,363 --> 00:19:41,030
And I'll take off the cheerleading uniform.
486
00:19:41,065 --> 00:19:43,032
Thank you.
487
00:19:46,737 --> 00:19:49,072
Is it okay if she wears it
for a little while longer?
488
00:19:51,742 --> 00:19:53,710
Dani, could you come out here?
489
00:19:53,744 --> 00:19:56,045
What's up, Dad?
490
00:19:56,080 --> 00:19:57,981
You have my blessing to date Blake.
491
00:19:58,015 --> 00:20:00,450
Oh, it's okay. We broke up.
492
00:20:00,484 --> 00:20:01,818
- What?
- What?
493
00:20:01,852 --> 00:20:03,853
Once everybody found out about,
494
00:20:03,888 --> 00:20:05,755
it kind of lost its excitement.
495
00:20:05,790 --> 00:20:07,857
But thanks for going to bat for us.
496
00:20:07,892 --> 00:20:09,092
Really appreciate it.
497
00:20:09,126 --> 00:20:10,727
Totally.
498
00:20:10,761 --> 00:20:12,595
Hey, but we should do it one more time
499
00:20:12,630 --> 00:20:14,364
before it's officially over, right?
500
00:20:14,398 --> 00:20:17,834
Totally. Where haven't we done it yet?
501
00:20:17,868 --> 00:20:19,702
Uh... What about a bed?
502
00:20:19,737 --> 00:20:21,838
Ooh, that's kinky.
503
00:20:27,749 --> 00:20:28,618
Hey, are you gonna keep that
504
00:20:28,738 --> 00:20:30,800
cheerleading outfit on
when we get home tonight?
505
00:20:30,834 --> 00:20:31,801
No.
506
00:20:31,835 --> 00:20:34,971
Oh. Okay.
507
00:20:35,005 --> 00:20:37,974
Instead, I was thinking we
could drive to my high school,
508
00:20:38,008 --> 00:20:40,610
hop the fence, and do
it on the football field.
509
00:20:40,644 --> 00:20:43,179
Whoa! Okay, that's way better.
510
00:20:45,148 --> 00:20:46,816
So excited.
511
00:20:46,850 --> 00:20:50,753
I've never had sex on
the football field before.
512
00:20:55,192 --> 00:20:59,128
Yeah, probably best if
you don't respond there.
513
00:20:59,558 --> 00:21:03,514
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