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1
00:00:03,370 --> 00:00:06,405
All right, be careful with the car, babe.
And don't move the seat.
2
00:00:06,440 --> 00:00:08,940
- I got it right where I like it.
- Good bye.
3
00:00:08,965 --> 00:00:11,636
- Two and 10, babe.
- Okay.
4
00:00:11,712 --> 00:00:14,508
- Don't peel out.
- I won't.
5
00:00:19,153 --> 00:00:23,417
Jesus is one, Jesus is all
6
00:00:23,491 --> 00:00:28,119
Jesus, pick me up when I fall
7
00:00:28,195 --> 00:00:31,560
And he said unto Abraham...
8
00:00:31,632 --> 00:00:34,292
Amen, amen
9
00:00:34,368 --> 00:00:35,526
So we pray...
10
00:00:35,603 --> 00:00:36,692
Faith...
11
00:00:36,770 --> 00:00:38,735
Jesus...
12
00:00:40,174 --> 00:00:42,299
Jesus?
13
00:00:47,047 --> 00:00:50,480
According to our latest
quarterly thing...
14
00:00:51,552 --> 00:00:56,112
Kruger Industrial Smoothing
is heading into the red.
15
00:00:56,190 --> 00:01:00,249
Or the black.
Or whatever the bad one is.
16
00:01:00,494 --> 00:01:02,459
Any thoughts?
17
00:01:03,931 --> 00:01:08,661
Well, I...
I know, when I'm a little strapped...
18
00:01:08,736 --> 00:01:15,173
I sometimes drop off my rent check
having "forgotten" to sign it.
19
00:01:15,242 --> 00:01:16,934
That could buy us some time.
20
00:01:17,711 --> 00:01:20,678
Works for me.
Good thinking, George.
21
00:01:20,748 --> 00:01:23,510
- Good idea.
- All right, George. Way to go, man.
22
00:01:23,617 --> 00:01:27,175
Or we don't even send the check...
23
00:01:27,254 --> 00:01:30,721
and then when they call,
we pretend we're the cleaning service.
24
00:01:31,125 --> 00:01:35,662
"Hello? I'm sorry, no here Kruger."
25
00:01:36,197 --> 00:01:37,286
Are you done?
26
00:01:38,999 --> 00:01:42,865
Silly voices.
Come on, people, let's get real.
27
00:01:42,937 --> 00:01:46,438
- Good one.
- That was bad.
28
00:01:50,010 --> 00:01:52,101
I had them, Jerry. They loved me.
29
00:01:52,179 --> 00:01:54,713
- And then?
- I lost them.
30
00:01:55,216 --> 00:01:58,114
I can usually come up with
one good comment during a meeting...
31
00:01:58,185 --> 00:02:02,051
but by the end, it's buried
under a pile of gaffes and bad puns.
32
00:02:02,723 --> 00:02:03,812
Showmanship, George.
33
00:02:03,891 --> 00:02:06,960
When you hit that high note,
you say good night and walk off.
34
00:02:07,027 --> 00:02:10,563
- I can't just leave.
- That's the way they do it in Vegas.
35
00:02:10,631 --> 00:02:13,962
- You never played Vegas.
- I hear things.
36
00:02:17,137 --> 00:02:19,034
Here's one.
37
00:02:19,106 --> 00:02:20,503
I borrowed Puddy's car...
38
00:02:20,574 --> 00:02:26,635
and all the presets on his radio
were Christian rock stations.
39
00:02:27,815 --> 00:02:30,076
I like Christian rock.
40
00:02:30,150 --> 00:02:32,081
It's very positive.
41
00:02:32,152 --> 00:02:36,416
It's not like those real musicians
who think they're so cool and hip.
42
00:02:37,791 --> 00:02:40,917
So you think that Puddy actually
believes in something?
43
00:02:40,995 --> 00:02:44,064
Well, it's a used car. He probably
never changed the presets.
44
00:02:44,131 --> 00:02:46,062
Yes. He is lazy.
45
00:02:46,133 --> 00:02:48,098
He doesn't know
how to program the buttons.
46
00:02:48,168 --> 00:02:50,998
Yes. He is dumb.
47
00:02:51,505 --> 00:02:54,267
So you prefer dumb and lazy
to religious?
48
00:02:54,341 --> 00:02:57,137
Dumb and lazy I understand.
49
00:02:57,945 --> 00:02:59,842
I'll tell you how you could check.
50
00:02:59,913 --> 00:03:02,504
Reprogram all the buttons,
see if he changes them back.
51
00:03:02,583 --> 00:03:05,447
You know, the old switcheroo.
52
00:03:05,519 --> 00:03:08,281
No, no, the old switcheroo
is you poison your drink...
53
00:03:08,355 --> 00:03:11,049
and then you switch it
with the other person's.
54
00:03:11,125 --> 00:03:14,251
No, it's doing the same thing
to someone that they did to you.
55
00:03:14,328 --> 00:03:18,455
Elaine's gonna do the same thing to
Puddy's radio that the radio did to her.
56
00:03:19,300 --> 00:03:21,960
- Well, that's the gist of it.
- Quiet!
57
00:03:23,003 --> 00:03:27,130
- So where is this Sophie?
- She's picking me up in a few minutes.
58
00:03:27,207 --> 00:03:30,970
- How long have you been together?
- I don't know. Since the last one.
59
00:03:32,212 --> 00:03:34,109
Oh, here she is.
You wanna meet her?
60
00:03:37,251 --> 00:03:40,320
By the way, how did Puddy
get back in the picture?
61
00:03:40,387 --> 00:03:43,923
I... I needed to move a bureau.
62
00:03:48,962 --> 00:03:50,222
Jerry, you got any pepper?
63
00:03:50,297 --> 00:03:51,659
- Hey, Jerry.
- Hey, Mickey.
64
00:03:51,732 --> 00:03:53,493
- Check the peppershaker.
- Yeah.
65
00:03:54,301 --> 00:03:55,390
Mickey.
66
00:04:02,109 --> 00:04:05,337
See? It should sound like that.
Something like that.
67
00:04:07,981 --> 00:04:10,606
No, a little wetter.
See, I didn't believe it.
68
00:04:10,684 --> 00:04:12,251
What's with the fake sneezing?
69
00:04:12,319 --> 00:04:14,216
We're going down
to Mount Sinai Hospital.
70
00:04:14,288 --> 00:04:17,653
See, they hire actors to help
the students practice diagnosing.
71
00:04:17,725 --> 00:04:20,316
They assign you a disease
and you act out the symptoms.
72
00:04:20,394 --> 00:04:23,292
- It's an easy gig.
- Yeah.
73
00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:27,527
- Do medical schools actually do this?
- Well, the better ones.
74
00:04:29,103 --> 00:04:31,433
All right,
let's practice retching, huh?
75
00:04:31,505 --> 00:04:32,936
Ready?
76
00:04:35,242 --> 00:04:37,173
I think the phone is ringing.
77
00:04:37,511 --> 00:04:40,011
Would you hold it a second?
78
00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:43,679
Thank you. Will you get out of here
with that stuff?
79
00:04:43,751 --> 00:04:46,581
Mickey, D.T.'s, huh?
80
00:04:48,288 --> 00:04:50,720
- Hello?
- Hey, it's me.
81
00:04:50,791 --> 00:04:53,451
- Elaine?
- No. It's me.
82
00:04:53,527 --> 00:04:55,561
George?
83
00:04:57,231 --> 00:04:59,162
Jerry, it's Sophie.
84
00:04:59,233 --> 00:05:01,631
I can't believe
you don't recognize my voice.
85
00:05:01,702 --> 00:05:04,168
I knew it was you. I was joking.
86
00:05:04,238 --> 00:05:06,397
I'm a comedian.
87
00:05:07,941 --> 00:05:09,474
Hey, you got any ipecac?
88
00:05:09,877 --> 00:05:13,105
Ipecac? Kramer, I really think
you guys are going too far with this.
89
00:05:13,180 --> 00:05:17,216
- No. Mickey, he swallowed 12 aspirin.
- Did he overdose?
90
00:05:17,284 --> 00:05:19,750
No, it's just too much.
91
00:05:21,488 --> 00:05:23,055
And it gets worse.
92
00:05:23,123 --> 00:05:26,021
The team working on the statue
in Lafayette Square...
93
00:05:26,093 --> 00:05:28,161
kind of over-smoothed it.
94
00:05:28,228 --> 00:05:32,287
They ground the head down
to about the size of a softball.
95
00:05:32,366 --> 00:05:33,763
And that spells trouble.
96
00:05:35,169 --> 00:05:37,567
Why don't we smooth the head
down to nothing...
97
00:05:37,638 --> 00:05:39,296
stick a pumpkin under its arm...
98
00:05:39,373 --> 00:05:42,033
and change the nameplate
to Ichabod Crane?
99
00:05:46,413 --> 00:05:49,573
All right. That's it for me.
100
00:05:49,650 --> 00:05:51,445
Good night, everybody.
101
00:05:55,923 --> 00:05:59,049
In your packets you will find
the disease you have been assigned...
102
00:05:59,126 --> 00:06:01,786
and the symptoms
you will need to exhibit.
103
00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:04,192
Bacterial meningitis.
104
00:06:04,264 --> 00:06:06,059
Jackpot!
105
00:06:08,368 --> 00:06:10,493
Gonorrhea?
106
00:06:15,709 --> 00:06:18,209
- You wanna trade?
- Sorry, buddy.
107
00:06:18,278 --> 00:06:20,346
This is the Hamlet of diseases.
108
00:06:20,414 --> 00:06:24,245
Severe pain, nausea, delusions,
it's got everything.
109
00:06:25,352 --> 00:06:26,817
How about you? You wanna trade?
110
00:06:26,887 --> 00:06:28,284
- Sure.
- Okay, what do you got?
111
00:06:28,355 --> 00:06:31,151
The surgeon left a sponge
inside me.
112
00:06:33,360 --> 00:06:35,121
Good luck with that.
113
00:06:36,663 --> 00:06:39,163
I knew I had hit my high note, so I...
114
00:06:39,233 --> 00:06:41,858
I thanked the crowd and I was gone.
115
00:06:42,336 --> 00:06:45,462
- What'd you do the rest of the day?
- I saw Titanic.
116
00:06:46,373 --> 00:06:48,498
So that old woman...
117
00:06:48,609 --> 00:06:50,677
she's just a liar, right?
118
00:06:50,744 --> 00:06:53,335
And a bit of a tramp, if you ask me.
119
00:06:53,881 --> 00:06:55,346
- Hello, boys.
- Hey.
120
00:06:55,415 --> 00:06:57,380
Did you give that radio
the old switcheroo?
121
00:06:57,451 --> 00:06:59,746
- I did.
- And the Christian rock?
122
00:06:59,820 --> 00:07:02,252
Resurrected.
123
00:07:03,290 --> 00:07:07,224
And look what I pried
off of his bumper.
124
00:07:07,294 --> 00:07:09,726
A Jesus fish.
125
00:07:11,031 --> 00:07:12,689
Jerry, you have any fish sticks?
126
00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:14,528
No.
127
00:07:15,002 --> 00:07:17,935
So you're disappointed
he's a spiritual person?
128
00:07:18,005 --> 00:07:21,404
Well, yeah. I got him because
he seemed so one-dimensional.
129
00:07:21,475 --> 00:07:23,668
I feel misled.
130
00:07:23,744 --> 00:07:25,402
I think it's neat.
131
00:07:25,479 --> 00:07:28,173
You don't hear that much
about God anymore.
132
00:07:30,317 --> 00:07:31,543
I hear things.
133
00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:35,484
So Sophie gave me the "it's me"
on the phone today.
134
00:07:35,556 --> 00:07:39,615
- "It's me"? Isn't that a little premature?
- I thought so.
135
00:07:39,693 --> 00:07:42,626
She's not a "me." I'm a "me."
136
00:07:42,696 --> 00:07:47,597
I'm against all "it's me" 's.
So self-absorbed and egotistical.
137
00:07:47,668 --> 00:07:51,226
It's like those hip musicians
with their complicated shoes.
138
00:07:55,409 --> 00:07:58,569
Well, I got gonorrhea.
139
00:08:03,584 --> 00:08:05,982
That seems about right.
140
00:08:06,053 --> 00:08:07,882
That's what they gave me.
141
00:08:09,489 --> 00:08:11,056
They?
142
00:08:11,858 --> 00:08:15,223
- The government?
- No, no.
143
00:08:15,295 --> 00:08:19,092
He's pretending he's got gonorrhea
so med students can diagnose it.
144
00:08:19,166 --> 00:08:22,531
And it's a waste of my talent.
It's just a little burning.
145
00:08:23,770 --> 00:08:26,395
Mickey, he got bacterial meningitis.
You know, that's....
146
00:08:26,473 --> 00:08:30,168
Well, I guess there are no
small diseases, only small actors.
147
00:08:30,243 --> 00:08:31,435
Yeah.
148
00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:35,911
All right, that's it for me.
149
00:08:35,983 --> 00:08:37,880
Good night, everybody.
150
00:08:39,453 --> 00:08:40,850
What was that? What was that?
151
00:08:40,921 --> 00:08:43,489
Showmanship. George is trying
to get out on a high note.
152
00:08:43,557 --> 00:08:46,956
See, showmanship. Maybe that's
what my gonorrhea's missing, huh?
153
00:08:47,027 --> 00:08:51,086
Yes. Step into that spotlight and belt
that gonorrhea out to the back row.
154
00:08:51,164 --> 00:08:53,357
Yes. Yes, I will.
155
00:08:53,433 --> 00:08:56,195
I'm gonna make people
feel my gonorrhea...
156
00:08:56,269 --> 00:08:59,031
and feel the gonorrhea
in themselves.
157
00:09:03,577 --> 00:09:06,271
And are you experiencing
any discomfort?
158
00:09:06,346 --> 00:09:09,040
Oh, just a little burning
during urination.
159
00:09:09,116 --> 00:09:11,582
Okay. Any other pain?
160
00:09:11,652 --> 00:09:15,916
The haunting memories of lost love.
161
00:09:16,990 --> 00:09:19,081
May I? Lights.
162
00:09:27,334 --> 00:09:31,666
Our eyes met
across the crowded hat store.
163
00:09:31,738 --> 00:09:37,504
I, a customer, and she,
a coquettish haberdasher.
164
00:09:38,378 --> 00:09:40,639
I pursued and she withdrew.
165
00:09:40,714 --> 00:09:44,181
And then she pursued
and I withdrew.
166
00:09:44,551 --> 00:09:46,983
And so we danced.
167
00:09:47,187 --> 00:09:49,687
And I burned for her...
168
00:09:49,756 --> 00:09:52,381
much like the burning
during urination...
169
00:09:52,459 --> 00:09:55,119
that I would experience
soon afterwards.
170
00:09:55,195 --> 00:09:58,025
- Gonorrhea.
- Gonorrhea.
171
00:10:04,604 --> 00:10:06,797
One message.
Hope it's not from you.
172
00:10:07,641 --> 00:10:10,266
Hey, Jerry, it's me. Call me back.
173
00:10:10,343 --> 00:10:12,707
- Sophie.
- She's still doing that?
174
00:10:12,779 --> 00:10:15,313
- Yep.
- All right, I'll tell you what you do.
175
00:10:15,382 --> 00:10:17,814
You call her back
and give her the "it's me," huh?
176
00:10:17,884 --> 00:10:19,679
Pull the old switcheroo.
177
00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:23,018
That's the "what's good for the goose
is good for the gander."
178
00:10:23,090 --> 00:10:25,124
What the hell is a gander, anyway?
179
00:10:26,059 --> 00:10:29,322
It's a goose that's had
the old switcheroo pulled on her.
180
00:10:31,098 --> 00:10:33,189
Hi, Sophie. It's me.
181
00:10:33,600 --> 00:10:34,826
Hey, Rafe.
182
00:10:34,901 --> 00:10:39,301
- She thinks it's someone named Rafe.
- Good, good. Let her think it.
183
00:10:40,307 --> 00:10:42,204
So, what's going on?
184
00:10:44,878 --> 00:10:46,240
Not a lot.
185
00:10:46,313 --> 00:10:48,040
Ask about you. Ask about you.
186
00:10:49,015 --> 00:10:51,811
So how are things with Jerry?
187
00:10:52,586 --> 00:10:54,313
Oh, I really like him...
188
00:10:54,387 --> 00:10:58,514
but, well, I still haven't told him
the tractor story.
189
00:10:58,592 --> 00:11:01,923
Right, right, the tractor story.
190
00:11:02,496 --> 00:11:05,429
Are you sick, Rafe?
You sound kind of funny.
191
00:11:05,499 --> 00:11:08,363
- I sound funny?
- Abort. Abort.
192
00:11:09,069 --> 00:11:10,761
Yeah, I better get to a doctor. Bye.
193
00:11:14,941 --> 00:11:16,975
That was close.
194
00:11:17,043 --> 00:11:20,203
What drives me
to take chances like that?
195
00:11:20,280 --> 00:11:21,438
That was very real.
196
00:11:21,515 --> 00:11:24,607
She said there's some tractor story
that she hasn't told me about.
197
00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:27,412
Back it up, back it up.
198
00:11:29,456 --> 00:11:30,887
Tractor story?
199
00:11:34,027 --> 00:11:35,287
What are you doing?
200
00:11:40,967 --> 00:11:45,299
- So where do you wanna eat?
- Feels like an Arby's night.
201
00:11:46,673 --> 00:11:51,574
Arby's. Beef and cheese and....
Do you believe in God?
202
00:11:51,645 --> 00:11:52,769
Yes.
203
00:11:53,914 --> 00:11:57,177
- So you're pretty religious?
- That's right.
204
00:11:58,552 --> 00:12:01,450
So is it a problem
that I'm not really religious?
205
00:12:01,521 --> 00:12:02,883
Not for me.
206
00:12:02,956 --> 00:12:05,616
- Why not?
- I'm not the one going to hell.
207
00:12:18,738 --> 00:12:21,807
You know what I think?
I bet she stole a tractor.
208
00:12:21,875 --> 00:12:25,911
No one's stealing a tractor.
It's a five-mile-an-hour getaway.
209
00:12:27,314 --> 00:12:30,474
We're dancing around the obvious.
It's gotta be disfigurement.
210
00:12:30,817 --> 00:12:33,977
Does she walk around holding a pen
she never seems to need?
211
00:12:34,054 --> 00:12:36,088
No, she looks completely normal.
212
00:12:37,324 --> 00:12:40,052
Okay. Here it is. I got it.
213
00:12:40,160 --> 00:12:43,058
She lost her thumbs
in a tractor accident...
214
00:12:43,129 --> 00:12:46,460
and they grafted her big toes on.
215
00:12:48,401 --> 00:12:50,366
They do it every day.
216
00:12:50,770 --> 00:12:53,338
You think she's got toes for thumbs?
217
00:12:54,107 --> 00:12:56,072
How's her handshake?
218
00:12:56,142 --> 00:12:58,073
Little firm, isn't it?
219
00:12:58,144 --> 00:13:01,008
- Maybe a little too firm?
- I don't know.
220
00:13:01,414 --> 00:13:03,345
Hands a little smelly?
221
00:13:04,818 --> 00:13:06,886
Why do I seek your counsel?
222
00:13:08,755 --> 00:13:11,847
- Well, I'm going to hell.
- That seems about right.
223
00:13:11,925 --> 00:13:13,515
According to Puddy.
224
00:13:13,593 --> 00:13:16,594
Have you heard the one about the guy
with coffee and doughnuts...?
225
00:13:16,663 --> 00:13:20,324
- I'm not in the mood.
- I'll have some coffee and a doughnut.
226
00:13:21,167 --> 00:13:23,201
What do you care?
You don't believe in hell.
227
00:13:23,270 --> 00:13:24,860
I know, but he does.
228
00:13:24,938 --> 00:13:28,667
So it's more of a relationship problem
than the final destination of your soul?
229
00:13:28,742 --> 00:13:31,402
Well, relationships
are very important to me.
230
00:13:31,478 --> 00:13:34,138
Maybe you can strike one up
with the Prince of Darkness...
231
00:13:34,214 --> 00:13:36,339
as you burn for all eternity.
232
00:13:37,784 --> 00:13:39,374
And a slice of devil's food cake.
233
00:13:44,958 --> 00:13:47,288
Hey.
234
00:13:47,961 --> 00:13:51,622
- Where is everyone?
- They're all off the project.
235
00:13:51,698 --> 00:13:56,326
They were boring.
George, you are my main man.
236
00:13:56,636 --> 00:13:57,725
I am?
237
00:13:57,804 --> 00:14:00,805
I don't know what it is.
I can't put my finger on it.
238
00:14:00,874 --> 00:14:04,432
But lately, you have just seemed on.
239
00:14:04,511 --> 00:14:08,547
And you always leave me
wanting more.
240
00:14:10,016 --> 00:14:13,745
This is a huge project involving...
241
00:14:13,820 --> 00:14:16,889
lots of numbers and papers
and folders.
242
00:14:16,957 --> 00:14:20,424
I'm not too worried about it.
Let's get started.
243
00:14:20,860 --> 00:14:22,222
Okay.
244
00:14:22,295 --> 00:14:24,863
- George. Check it out.
- Yeah?
245
00:14:25,565 --> 00:14:27,997
Three times around with no feet.
246
00:14:28,535 --> 00:14:30,262
All me.
247
00:14:31,104 --> 00:14:33,104
All me.
248
00:14:35,675 --> 00:14:38,243
All right. And here are your ailments
for this week.
249
00:14:38,311 --> 00:14:40,936
By the way, Mr. Kramer,
you were excellent.
250
00:14:41,014 --> 00:14:42,411
Thank you.
251
00:14:42,482 --> 00:14:44,812
Cirrhosis of the liver with jaundice.
252
00:14:44,884 --> 00:14:47,282
All right, I get to wear makeup.
253
00:14:47,354 --> 00:14:50,480
- What did you get?
- Gonorrhea.
254
00:14:50,857 --> 00:14:52,788
Excuse me,
I think there's been a mistake.
255
00:14:52,859 --> 00:14:54,324
See, I had gonorrhea last week.
256
00:14:54,394 --> 00:14:57,463
Oh, it's no mistake.
We loved what you did with it.
257
00:15:00,567 --> 00:15:04,660
Boy, I don't believe this.
I'm being typecast.
258
00:15:07,240 --> 00:15:10,241
I move my knight here.
259
00:15:10,377 --> 00:15:11,466
Check.
260
00:15:11,544 --> 00:15:15,740
They should update these pieces.
Nobody rides horses anymore.
261
00:15:16,316 --> 00:15:19,146
Maybe they should change it
to a tractor.
262
00:15:19,853 --> 00:15:21,944
Jerry, are you embarrassed
that you're losing?
263
00:15:22,022 --> 00:15:23,487
Losing?
264
00:15:23,556 --> 00:15:27,854
You know, yesterday I lost control
of my car, almost bought the farm.
265
00:15:28,395 --> 00:15:30,292
Bought the farm?
266
00:15:30,764 --> 00:15:32,024
Tractor.
267
00:15:33,333 --> 00:15:35,663
This is an odd side of you, Jerry.
268
00:15:36,403 --> 00:15:37,936
I feel uncomfortable.
269
00:15:38,371 --> 00:15:41,497
Wait, don't go. Let's thumb-wrestle.
270
00:15:47,547 --> 00:15:48,807
A scar?
271
00:15:48,882 --> 00:15:53,043
A big long scar, where her leg
would dangle when she's riding a...
272
00:15:53,119 --> 00:15:54,311
A tractor.
273
00:15:54,387 --> 00:15:57,786
I'm sure she's a little self-conscious
and doesn't like to talk about it.
274
00:15:57,857 --> 00:16:00,858
She's more self-conscious about that
than her toe-thumbs.
275
00:16:00,927 --> 00:16:03,154
She doesn't have toe-thumbs.
276
00:16:04,397 --> 00:16:07,830
- She will if she keeps horsing around...
- All right.
277
00:16:08,401 --> 00:16:10,799
So how's the two-man operation
at Kruger?
278
00:16:10,870 --> 00:16:14,406
Two-man. It's all me.
Kruger doesn't do anything.
279
00:16:14,474 --> 00:16:18,169
Disappears for hours at a time,
gives me fake excuses.
280
00:16:18,244 --> 00:16:21,211
This afternoon, I found him
with sleep creases on his face.
281
00:16:21,648 --> 00:16:23,875
The only reason I got out
to get a bite today...
282
00:16:23,950 --> 00:16:27,213
was that he finally promised to
buckle down and do some actual work.
283
00:16:29,456 --> 00:16:31,820
Oh, I don't believe this.
284
00:16:34,094 --> 00:16:36,924
This is what I have to put up with,
Jerry.
285
00:16:38,798 --> 00:16:40,263
Mr. Kruger.
286
00:16:40,333 --> 00:16:43,231
Who said he was going to do
some actual work today?
287
00:16:43,303 --> 00:16:45,928
- Who?
- I'm not too worried about it.
288
00:16:46,739 --> 00:16:48,306
Well, I am.
289
00:16:48,374 --> 00:16:52,035
Couldn't you try to go through some
of that stuff I put in your shoebox?
290
00:16:52,112 --> 00:16:54,703
All right, all right, I'm going.
291
00:16:56,983 --> 00:16:59,244
Have you ever seen
anything like this?
292
00:16:59,619 --> 00:17:01,414
Never.
293
00:17:06,359 --> 00:17:09,656
Elaine, they forgot to deliver
your paper today.
294
00:17:09,996 --> 00:17:13,623
- Why don't you just grab that one?
- But that belongs to Mr. Potato Guy.
295
00:17:13,700 --> 00:17:15,529
- That's his.
- Come on, get it.
296
00:17:17,871 --> 00:17:22,067
- Well, if you want it, you get it.
- Sorry, thou shalt not steal.
297
00:17:24,878 --> 00:17:27,105
Oh, but it's okay for me?
298
00:17:27,180 --> 00:17:29,612
Oh, what do you care?
You know where you're going.
299
00:17:30,817 --> 00:17:33,044
All right, that is it.
I can't live like this.
300
00:17:33,119 --> 00:17:34,777
- Oh, no.
- Come on.
301
00:17:34,854 --> 00:17:36,717
All right, what did I do?
302
00:17:37,190 --> 00:17:39,952
David, I'm going to hell.
303
00:17:40,026 --> 00:17:42,117
The worst place in the world.
304
00:17:42,195 --> 00:17:47,198
With devils and those caves
and the ragged clothing.
305
00:17:47,267 --> 00:17:50,564
And the heat, my God, the heat!
306
00:17:50,637 --> 00:17:54,138
- What do you think about all that?
- It's gonna be rough.
307
00:17:55,074 --> 00:17:58,007
- You should be trying to save me.
- Don't boss me.
308
00:17:58,077 --> 00:18:00,771
- This is why you're going to hell.
- I am not going to hell.
309
00:18:00,847 --> 00:18:04,383
And if you think I'm going to hell,
you should care that I'm going to hell...
310
00:18:04,450 --> 00:18:05,983
even though I am not.
311
00:18:07,387 --> 00:18:11,924
- You stole my Jesus fish, didn't you?
- Yeah, that's right.
312
00:18:17,030 --> 00:18:20,099
My liver. Why did I drink
for all those years?
313
00:18:20,567 --> 00:18:24,068
Why did I look for love in a bottle?
314
00:18:24,571 --> 00:18:26,696
Mr. Kramer, you're up.
315
00:18:28,274 --> 00:18:29,705
Oh, hey, Mickey.
316
00:18:29,776 --> 00:18:30,968
- Wait a minute.
- What?
317
00:18:31,044 --> 00:18:34,443
- You are doing gonorrhea, aren't you?
- Yeah, well, we'll see.
318
00:18:36,583 --> 00:18:40,016
So, what seems to be bothering you
today, Mr. Kramer?
319
00:18:40,086 --> 00:18:41,278
Well, I...
320
00:18:41,354 --> 00:18:46,118
I guess it started about 20 years ago
when I got back from Vietnam.
321
00:18:46,192 --> 00:18:49,318
And this was the only friend
I had left.
322
00:18:49,395 --> 00:18:53,522
Hey! That's my cirrhosis!
He's stealing my cirrhosis!
323
00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:56,999
You wanna be sick?
I'll make you sick!
324
00:18:57,870 --> 00:19:01,030
Cirrhosis of the liver
and PCP addiction?
325
00:19:05,345 --> 00:19:07,003
Let me see if I understand this.
326
00:19:07,380 --> 00:19:10,916
You're concerned that he isn't
concerned that you're going to hell.
327
00:19:10,984 --> 00:19:13,052
And you feel that she's too bossy.
328
00:19:13,920 --> 00:19:15,885
- Yeah, that's right.
- Yeah, that's right.
329
00:19:16,289 --> 00:19:19,620
Well, oftentimes,
in cases of interfaith marriages...
330
00:19:19,692 --> 00:19:21,521
couples have difficulty...
331
00:19:22,195 --> 00:19:23,887
No one's getting married here.
332
00:19:23,963 --> 00:19:25,894
- You aren't?
- No.
333
00:19:27,133 --> 00:19:28,825
We're just, you know...
334
00:19:28,901 --> 00:19:31,026
having a good time.
335
00:19:34,974 --> 00:19:38,271
Well, then it's simple.
You're both going to hell.
336
00:19:38,911 --> 00:19:42,037
No way. This is bogus, man.
337
00:19:43,416 --> 00:19:44,915
Well, thank you, Father.
338
00:19:45,318 --> 00:19:47,409
Did you hear the one
about the guy in hell...
339
00:19:47,487 --> 00:19:49,919
who's talking to the devil
by the coffee machine?
340
00:19:49,989 --> 00:19:52,580
I'm really not in the mood.
I'm going to hell.
341
00:19:53,826 --> 00:19:55,325
Lighten up.
342
00:19:55,395 --> 00:19:58,055
It'll only feel like an eternity.
343
00:20:06,039 --> 00:20:09,973
You know, Jerry, there's this thing
that I haven't told you about.
344
00:20:10,043 --> 00:20:15,012
See, there was this tractor, and....
345
00:20:16,182 --> 00:20:18,773
You know, boy, this is...
This is really difficult.
346
00:20:18,851 --> 00:20:20,543
Sophie...
347
00:20:20,620 --> 00:20:22,119
it's me.
348
00:20:23,623 --> 00:20:27,784
I know about the tractor story
and I'm fine with it.
349
00:20:27,860 --> 00:20:29,791
How could you know?
350
00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:34,889
It's not important.
351
00:20:34,967 --> 00:20:38,195
What's important is I'm not gonna
let a little thing like that...
352
00:20:38,271 --> 00:20:43,638
ruin what could be a very long-term
and meaningful relationship.
353
00:20:44,143 --> 00:20:45,642
I didn't say that, no.
354
00:20:45,712 --> 00:20:47,871
You gave me gonorrhea,
you didn't even tell me!
355
00:20:47,947 --> 00:20:49,309
Well, I'm sorry.
356
00:20:49,382 --> 00:20:53,043
I gave you gonorrhea because
I thought you'd have fun with it.
357
00:20:53,119 --> 00:20:55,414
Hey, hey, I'm with someone.
358
00:20:56,756 --> 00:20:58,255
Hello.
359
00:20:58,658 --> 00:21:02,524
No, I understand. This could be
a tough thing to deal with.
360
00:21:02,595 --> 00:21:06,324
The important thing is that you have
a partner who's supportive.
361
00:21:06,999 --> 00:21:10,000
You know, she's right.
362
00:21:10,737 --> 00:21:15,001
Unfortunately, I didn't have a partner.
I got gonorrhea from a tractor.
363
00:21:16,342 --> 00:21:18,967
You got gonorrhea from a tractor?
364
00:21:19,045 --> 00:21:21,943
And you call that the tractor story?
365
00:21:22,014 --> 00:21:24,139
You can't get it from that.
366
00:21:24,217 --> 00:21:26,376
But I did. My boyfriend said
I got gonorrhea...
367
00:21:26,452 --> 00:21:29,146
from riding the tractor
in my bathing suit.
368
00:21:29,222 --> 00:21:32,621
All right, that's it for me.
You've been great.
369
00:21:32,692 --> 00:21:34,817
Good night, everybody.
370
00:21:57,316 --> 00:22:00,647
Would you mind helping me out
with some of this stuff?
371
00:22:01,254 --> 00:22:03,345
You seem like you've got
a good handle on it.
372
00:22:03,423 --> 00:22:05,184
No, I don't!
373
00:22:05,258 --> 00:22:08,259
Don't you even care?
This is your company.
374
00:22:08,327 --> 00:22:11,396
It's your name
on the outside of the building.
375
00:22:11,464 --> 00:22:16,024
Speaking of which, the R fell off
and all it says now is "K-uger."
376
00:22:16,102 --> 00:22:19,000
K-uger. That sounds like
one of those old-time car horns, huh?
377
00:22:19,071 --> 00:22:21,605
K-uger! K-uger!
378
00:22:24,377 --> 00:22:27,742
You are too much, Mr. Kruger.
Too much.
379
00:22:27,814 --> 00:22:30,883
Thank you, George.
You've been great. That's it for me.
380
00:22:30,950 --> 00:22:33,883
Oh, no, you're not going out
on a high note with me, Mr. Kruger.
381
00:22:33,953 --> 00:22:35,782
It's K-uger.
382
00:22:36,088 --> 00:22:38,122
No! No!
383
00:22:38,191 --> 00:22:40,782
Good night, everybody.
27870
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