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1
00:00:02,680 --> 00:00:06,996
When are they gonna learn that news
about China is an instant page-turner?
2
00:00:07,075 --> 00:00:08,164
What's that?
3
00:00:08,242 --> 00:00:10,572
It's a Wizard electronic organizer
for my dad.
4
00:00:10,645 --> 00:00:12,975
- I'm going to Florida for his birthday.
- How much was it?
5
00:00:13,047 --> 00:00:14,478
Two hundred. I'll tell him 50.
6
00:00:14,549 --> 00:00:17,379
He doesn't care for the gift,
he gets excited about the deal.
7
00:00:17,452 --> 00:00:19,645
Where are you getting
a Wizard for $50?
8
00:00:19,721 --> 00:00:24,053
I'll tell him I got it on the street and
maybe it's hot. That's his favorite.
9
00:00:24,125 --> 00:00:27,524
I got a message from the
Rosses at work today.
10
00:00:27,595 --> 00:00:30,126
Susan's parents?
When's the last time you talked with them?
11
00:00:30,331 --> 00:00:32,956
At the funeral, give or take.
12
00:00:33,468 --> 00:00:36,833
Deep down I always kind of felt that
they blamed me for Susan's death.
13
00:00:36,904 --> 00:00:39,495
Why? Because you picked out
the poison envelopes?
14
00:00:40,942 --> 00:00:42,737
That's silly.
15
00:00:45,613 --> 00:00:49,774
Darryl, these are people I know.
16
00:00:49,851 --> 00:00:52,044
Jerry, George.
17
00:00:52,120 --> 00:00:55,314
Nice meeting you. I gotta run,
Elaine. I'll see you later.
18
00:00:55,389 --> 00:00:56,956
Okay.
19
00:00:58,392 --> 00:00:59,516
Still no Puddy?
20
00:01:00,328 --> 00:01:03,261
I think his answering machine's
broken, so I just gave up.
21
00:01:04,365 --> 00:01:05,489
What do you think?
22
00:01:05,566 --> 00:01:08,134
What, about you dating a black guy?
What's the big deal?
23
00:01:08,202 --> 00:01:12,295
- What black guy?
- Darryl. He's black, isn't he?
24
00:01:12,373 --> 00:01:14,373
He is?
25
00:01:14,442 --> 00:01:17,340
- No, he isn't.
- Isn't he, Elaine?
26
00:01:17,411 --> 00:01:19,877
- You think?
- I thought he looked Irish.
27
00:01:20,648 --> 00:01:22,215
- What's his last name?
- Nelson.
28
00:01:22,283 --> 00:01:24,476
- That's not Irish.
- I think he's black.
29
00:01:24,552 --> 00:01:25,983
Should we talking about this?
30
00:01:26,053 --> 00:01:28,121
- I think it's okay.
- No, it isn't.
31
00:01:28,189 --> 00:01:30,052
- Why not?
- Well, it would be okay...
32
00:01:30,124 --> 00:01:31,714
if Darryl was here.
33
00:01:31,793 --> 00:01:34,225
- If he's black.
- Is he black?
34
00:01:34,295 --> 00:01:35,384
Does it matter?
35
00:01:35,463 --> 00:01:38,123
No, of course not.
I mean, I'd just like to know.
36
00:01:38,199 --> 00:01:40,995
- So you need to know?
- No, I don't need to know.
37
00:01:41,068 --> 00:01:43,762
I just think it would be nice
if I knew.
38
00:01:43,838 --> 00:01:45,098
Shall I take that?
39
00:01:45,173 --> 00:01:46,570
- One sec.
- Oh, here.
40
00:01:46,641 --> 00:01:48,003
Oh, yeah, hang on.
41
00:01:57,685 --> 00:02:01,084
- Mrs. Ross, it's George.
- Who?
42
00:02:01,689 --> 00:02:05,156
George Costanza. Susan's friend?
43
00:02:07,261 --> 00:02:09,454
Long time no speak.
44
00:02:09,530 --> 00:02:11,689
We're all out of lime juice.
45
00:02:11,766 --> 00:02:13,800
I told that woman to buy more.
46
00:02:14,368 --> 00:02:16,698
George,
the Susan Ross Foundation...
47
00:02:16,771 --> 00:02:18,771
is having an event this weekend.
48
00:02:18,840 --> 00:02:24,105
Oh, I just leased a house
out in the Hamptons...
49
00:02:24,178 --> 00:02:27,372
and I have got to get out there
this weekend and sign the papers.
50
00:02:27,448 --> 00:02:29,175
I'm going back to bed.
51
00:02:29,717 --> 00:02:32,547
- Thank you for calling, George.
- Oh, sure.
52
00:02:32,620 --> 00:02:35,018
I mean, after all,
you were almost my....
53
00:02:35,089 --> 00:02:37,657
Okay, I gotta go.
54
00:02:39,293 --> 00:02:41,020
House in the Hamptons?
55
00:02:41,095 --> 00:02:43,026
I've been lying about my income
for years.
56
00:02:43,097 --> 00:02:46,098
I figured I could afford a fake
house in the Hamptons.
57
00:02:46,734 --> 00:02:48,096
- Well.
- Hey.
58
00:02:48,169 --> 00:02:51,295
Well, grab a cigar, boys.
59
00:02:51,372 --> 00:02:52,962
Yeah, it's time to celebrate.
60
00:02:53,040 --> 00:02:55,973
- What are we celebrating?
- You remember my coffee table book?
61
00:02:56,043 --> 00:02:57,576
With the little legs.
62
00:02:57,645 --> 00:02:59,440
That's the one.
63
00:03:00,181 --> 00:03:04,809
A big Hollywood so-and-so
optioned it for a movie.
64
00:03:07,421 --> 00:03:10,649
How are they gonna make
that book into a movie?
65
00:03:10,725 --> 00:03:13,419
Remember that photo book
on toy ray guns?
66
00:03:13,494 --> 00:03:16,688
- Yeah.
- Independence Day?
67
00:03:17,899 --> 00:03:19,364
How much are they paying you?
68
00:03:19,433 --> 00:03:22,400
Let's just say I don't have to
worry about working for a while.
69
00:03:22,470 --> 00:03:25,061
A long while.
70
00:03:25,773 --> 00:03:28,603
That's funny, because
I haven't seen you working...
71
00:03:28,676 --> 00:03:32,837
for a while. A long while.
72
00:03:32,914 --> 00:03:35,346
And you're not going to,
because I'm hanging it up.
73
00:03:35,416 --> 00:03:38,849
Boys, I'm retiring.
74
00:03:38,920 --> 00:03:40,317
From what?
75
00:03:40,421 --> 00:03:43,081
From the grind.
I mean, who needs it?
76
00:03:43,157 --> 00:03:45,885
You know, I've accomplished
everything I've set out to do.
77
00:03:46,928 --> 00:03:48,017
What's that?
78
00:03:48,095 --> 00:03:51,164
Oh, bought myself
a little retirement gift.
79
00:03:51,232 --> 00:03:53,527
A gold watch.
80
00:03:54,335 --> 00:03:56,733
It's not really gold.
81
00:04:09,317 --> 00:04:11,783
- Hey.
- Hey, great music.
82
00:04:11,852 --> 00:04:13,510
Oh, it's my neighbor.
83
00:04:13,587 --> 00:04:16,053
They blast that stuff
24 hours a day. I hate it.
84
00:04:17,224 --> 00:04:18,985
Turn it down!
85
00:04:21,395 --> 00:04:25,397
Oh, wow. These are nice.
86
00:04:25,466 --> 00:04:28,262
Do they have any
cultural significance?
87
00:04:28,336 --> 00:04:30,597
They're African.
88
00:04:31,505 --> 00:04:33,129
Right.
89
00:04:33,708 --> 00:04:36,208
- African.
- Well, not "Africa."
90
00:04:36,277 --> 00:04:37,844
Actually South Africa.
91
00:04:37,912 --> 00:04:40,310
South Africa.
92
00:04:40,381 --> 00:04:45,180
My family used to live there. We got
out years ago. For obvious reasons.
93
00:04:45,252 --> 00:04:49,186
- You know how it is.
- Maybe.
94
00:04:49,490 --> 00:04:52,150
You must hate hot dogs, huh?
95
00:04:53,361 --> 00:04:57,329
Or else you really like them
and that's why you do this.
96
00:04:58,933 --> 00:05:03,595
If I had one of these things
I'd be eating hot dogs all the time.
97
00:05:03,671 --> 00:05:05,602
You gonna buy a hot dog or not?
98
00:05:06,040 --> 00:05:07,630
No.
99
00:05:14,648 --> 00:05:17,046
Rise and shine, sleepyhead.
100
00:05:18,686 --> 00:05:21,050
It's 5:30 in the morning.
101
00:05:21,756 --> 00:05:23,881
We let you sleep in.
102
00:05:24,759 --> 00:05:29,091
Well, as long as I'm up,
Dad, I got you a birthday present.
103
00:05:29,163 --> 00:05:30,855
Here. Happy birthday.
104
00:05:30,931 --> 00:05:33,795
Oh, Jerry. I should be
buying you presents.
105
00:05:34,602 --> 00:05:36,363
What does that mean?
106
00:05:36,437 --> 00:05:38,630
Leave your father alone.
It's his birthday.
107
00:05:40,808 --> 00:05:43,536
It's a radar detector.
108
00:05:43,944 --> 00:05:48,572
Radar detector. I've never seen
you go over 20 miles an hour.
109
00:05:48,749 --> 00:05:52,444
You're like the grand marshal
of the Rose Bowl parade.
110
00:05:52,987 --> 00:05:55,282
It's a Wizard organizer.
111
00:05:55,356 --> 00:05:56,821
This looks like too much money.
112
00:05:56,891 --> 00:05:59,721
No, I got it from a guy on the street.
It was like 50 bucks.
113
00:05:59,794 --> 00:06:01,657
- You think it's hot?
- Could be.
114
00:06:01,729 --> 00:06:06,232
Attaboy. Helen, Jerry got me
a hot Wizard computer.
115
00:06:06,300 --> 00:06:08,527
I'm right here.
116
00:06:09,070 --> 00:06:12,662
You can do everything with it. You can
get e-mail, fax, there's a calculator.
117
00:06:12,740 --> 00:06:15,001
So I can use it to figure out the tip?
118
00:06:15,076 --> 00:06:18,339
Yeah, I guess. But the really cool
thing is the daily planner.
119
00:06:18,412 --> 00:06:20,776
We can go to the restaurant
to figure out the tips.
120
00:06:20,848 --> 00:06:23,348
Jerry, you're getting your
father too excited.
121
00:06:26,120 --> 00:06:29,246
Hey, buddy. When did you get in?
122
00:06:30,624 --> 00:06:32,589
Kramer, what are you doing here?
123
00:06:32,660 --> 00:06:35,695
I told you I was retiring.
I moved in next door.
124
00:06:37,465 --> 00:06:40,432
Mr. Cornstein died,
and it's a beautiful apartment.
125
00:06:40,501 --> 00:06:44,037
Yeah, your folks said it was for rent,
so I jumped on it.
126
00:06:45,673 --> 00:06:47,502
Kramer, you can't live down here.
127
00:06:47,575 --> 00:06:50,576
This is where people come to die.
128
00:06:52,580 --> 00:06:54,204
Not you.
129
00:06:54,281 --> 00:06:55,973
Older people.
130
00:06:56,050 --> 00:06:58,948
Don't eat cookies for breakfast.
131
00:06:59,019 --> 00:07:02,885
I'll fix you something.
How about a feta cheese omelet?
132
00:07:02,957 --> 00:07:04,581
That sounds great, Mom.
133
00:07:04,658 --> 00:07:06,726
You feed him he'll never leave.
134
00:07:06,794 --> 00:07:10,728
I don't have any feta. How about
cottage cheese and egg beaters?
135
00:07:11,298 --> 00:07:13,457
I guess.
136
00:07:13,534 --> 00:07:15,864
- I don't believe this.
- I know, I know.
137
00:07:15,936 --> 00:07:17,663
Don't I look more relaxed?
138
00:07:50,504 --> 00:07:54,438
So, George, do you have any
thoughts on this Darryl situation?
139
00:07:54,508 --> 00:07:56,007
Actually, I did have a thought.
140
00:07:57,912 --> 00:08:00,173
Why don't you just ask him?
141
00:08:01,282 --> 00:08:06,581
Because if I ask him,
then it's like I really want to know.
142
00:08:08,522 --> 00:08:10,954
Maybe he's...
143
00:08:11,392 --> 00:08:13,460
mixed.
144
00:08:14,228 --> 00:08:15,659
Is that the right word?
145
00:08:15,729 --> 00:08:18,354
I don't think we're supposed
to be talking about this.
146
00:08:18,432 --> 00:08:21,365
- I'm just gonna go to the bathroom.
- You know what? I'm leaving.
147
00:08:21,435 --> 00:08:24,368
- I'll talk to Jerry when he gets back.
- All right.
148
00:08:25,673 --> 00:08:28,970
Oh, Mrs. Ross. Mr. Ross.
149
00:08:29,076 --> 00:08:31,644
Oh, you're George's friend.
150
00:08:31,712 --> 00:08:34,076
We saw him in the city
this weekend.
151
00:08:34,148 --> 00:08:37,308
What happened to his place
in the Hamptons?
152
00:08:37,384 --> 00:08:42,512
The Hamptons? George Costanza?
153
00:08:46,794 --> 00:08:49,089
I don't think so.
154
00:08:49,930 --> 00:08:51,759
Have a good one.
155
00:08:56,403 --> 00:08:58,027
Rosses.
156
00:08:58,105 --> 00:09:01,402
George. We were just
talking about you.
157
00:09:02,476 --> 00:09:04,806
Well, sorry I missed
that charity thing...
158
00:09:04,878 --> 00:09:07,879
but this was one of those truly
glorious Hampton weekends...
159
00:09:07,948 --> 00:09:10,846
- that you always hear about.
- Really?
160
00:09:10,918 --> 00:09:12,679
Yeah, I may move out there.
161
00:09:14,154 --> 00:09:16,381
I mean it. I'll do it.
162
00:09:18,525 --> 00:09:20,525
Okay, I'll see you later.
163
00:09:20,828 --> 00:09:22,520
Keep it real.
164
00:09:25,532 --> 00:09:29,728
Another fine meal. And now
for my Wizard tip calculator.
165
00:09:29,803 --> 00:09:32,201
Dad, it's got lots of other functions.
166
00:09:32,273 --> 00:09:35,001
Don't worry.
I'll get to the other functions.
167
00:09:35,075 --> 00:09:36,233
I can't get it open.
168
00:09:38,679 --> 00:09:41,247
Yay, Jerry got it open.
169
00:09:44,251 --> 00:09:47,878
The service was slow, and God
forbid they should refill the water.
170
00:09:47,955 --> 00:09:51,582
How does 12.4 percent sound?
171
00:09:52,293 --> 00:09:57,831
Well, your tip is
$4 and 36.6666 cents.
172
00:09:57,898 --> 00:09:59,625
We'll round down.
173
00:10:00,668 --> 00:10:04,226
Jerry, it was so nice of you to come
down here on your father's birthday.
174
00:10:04,305 --> 00:10:06,737
You've helped take his mind
off the condo election.
175
00:10:06,807 --> 00:10:09,569
Right. You can't run for
condo president because you were...
176
00:10:09,643 --> 00:10:12,405
- impeached at the other condo.
- I was never impeached.
177
00:10:12,479 --> 00:10:14,376
I resigned.
178
00:10:14,448 --> 00:10:16,982
Even so, the press would bury him.
179
00:10:17,051 --> 00:10:19,244
What press?
180
00:10:19,853 --> 00:10:22,751
The condo newsletter.
The Boca Breeze.
181
00:10:22,823 --> 00:10:25,517
Pinko commie rag.
182
00:10:27,661 --> 00:10:30,423
Hey, Morty. Your boy here.
183
00:10:30,497 --> 00:10:33,589
He just got a date with that
young aquacise instructor.
184
00:10:33,667 --> 00:10:35,632
She's 50.
185
00:10:35,703 --> 00:10:39,705
You know what he's got?
He's got charisma.
186
00:10:39,773 --> 00:10:41,431
- That's my man.
- I'll see you guys.
187
00:10:41,508 --> 00:10:42,836
Yeah.
188
00:10:45,112 --> 00:10:46,270
Yeah.
189
00:10:48,716 --> 00:10:51,785
Morty, what are you looking at?
190
00:10:51,952 --> 00:10:53,679
I'll tell you what I'm looking at.
191
00:10:53,754 --> 00:10:59,656
The next condo board president
of Del Boca Vista, phase three.
192
00:11:04,198 --> 00:11:07,233
Elaine, thank you for the Wizard.
193
00:11:07,568 --> 00:11:10,034
Wow, it's got so many functions.
194
00:11:10,104 --> 00:11:11,967
Yeah, yeah, forget about all that.
195
00:11:12,039 --> 00:11:16,007
First thing is first,
warranty information.
196
00:11:16,076 --> 00:11:19,168
Name. We know that. Hobbies.
197
00:11:19,246 --> 00:11:21,678
- Skiing, racquetball...
- Well, I don't do that stuff.
198
00:11:21,749 --> 00:11:24,374
It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter.
199
00:11:24,451 --> 00:11:27,179
Oh, Here's one. Race.
200
00:11:27,788 --> 00:11:29,082
Isn't that optional?
201
00:11:29,156 --> 00:11:34,193
It certainly should be.
It's nobody's damn business.
202
00:11:34,661 --> 00:11:36,661
But they really would like to know.
203
00:11:37,965 --> 00:11:41,000
- All right. I'm Asian.
- What?
204
00:11:41,068 --> 00:11:42,430
Just to mess with them.
205
00:11:43,704 --> 00:11:46,329
Right. Good one.
206
00:11:46,407 --> 00:11:50,034
Average income.
Over a hundred thousand.
207
00:11:51,245 --> 00:11:53,108
- Really?
- So does that matter?
208
00:11:53,580 --> 00:11:58,447
No. But it's very nice to know.
209
00:12:02,356 --> 00:12:05,482
So did you figure out Darryl's...
210
00:12:06,193 --> 00:12:07,726
you know?
211
00:12:07,828 --> 00:12:12,024
I've given up. So now we're going
to a bunch of Spanish restaurants.
212
00:12:12,099 --> 00:12:14,030
Figure that'll cover us either way.
213
00:12:15,536 --> 00:12:17,968
You're a master of race relations.
214
00:12:18,038 --> 00:12:21,369
So Kramer's running
for president of the condo?
215
00:12:22,009 --> 00:12:25,078
Yeah. It's all my father's doing.
216
00:12:25,813 --> 00:12:28,074
He wants to install Kramer
in a puppet regime...
217
00:12:28,148 --> 00:12:30,546
and then wield power
from behind the scenes.
218
00:12:30,617 --> 00:12:33,447
Preferably from the sauna
in the clubhouse.
219
00:12:34,154 --> 00:12:36,381
- Who are they running against?
- Common sense...
220
00:12:36,457 --> 00:12:38,548
and a guy in a wheelchair.
221
00:12:39,760 --> 00:12:41,919
- Jerry?
- He's still down with his folks.
222
00:12:41,995 --> 00:12:43,392
What are you doing here?
223
00:12:43,464 --> 00:12:45,429
- Elaine. Elaine.
- I'm getting his mail.
224
00:12:45,499 --> 00:12:48,329
- Oh, no.
- He asked you to get the mail?
225
00:12:49,670 --> 00:12:51,670
Jerry,
why is Elaine getting your mail?
226
00:12:51,738 --> 00:12:55,797
George, listen to me.
I have a very important job for you.
227
00:12:57,344 --> 00:12:59,139
I want you to come by twice a day...
228
00:12:59,213 --> 00:13:02,339
and flush the toilet
so the gaskets don't dry out and leak.
229
00:13:04,318 --> 00:13:07,410
- What?
- Well, what about the mail?
230
00:13:07,488 --> 00:13:09,112
This is far more important.
231
00:13:09,189 --> 00:13:12,622
You must exercise the gaskets,
George.
232
00:13:13,994 --> 00:13:17,063
All right, Jerry, I'll do it. See you.
233
00:13:19,199 --> 00:13:22,029
So, ran into the Rosses again.
234
00:13:22,102 --> 00:13:24,033
Oh, right, at the coffee shop.
235
00:13:24,104 --> 00:13:27,537
Where did they get the idea that you
have a place in the Hamptons?
236
00:13:31,278 --> 00:13:33,312
- From me.
- What did you say?
237
00:13:33,380 --> 00:13:36,347
I told them I have a place
in the Hamptons.
238
00:13:36,917 --> 00:13:38,109
What did you say?
239
00:13:38,185 --> 00:13:39,775
I told them you didn't.
240
00:13:41,221 --> 00:13:45,451
And I laughed and I laughed.
241
00:13:46,493 --> 00:13:48,527
So they know.
242
00:13:48,595 --> 00:13:51,391
- Those liars.
- But you lied first.
243
00:13:51,465 --> 00:13:53,863
But they let me go on and on
all about the Hamptons.
244
00:13:53,934 --> 00:13:55,126
They never said a thing.
245
00:13:55,202 --> 00:13:57,202
You don't let somebody lie
when you know.
246
00:13:57,271 --> 00:13:59,635
- You call them a liar.
- Like you're a liar.
247
00:13:59,706 --> 00:14:01,740
Yes. Thank you. Was that so hard?
248
00:14:01,808 --> 00:14:06,208
So this is over? Not over?
I'm betting not over.
249
00:14:06,613 --> 00:14:08,544
Not by a long shot.
250
00:14:08,615 --> 00:14:10,615
I'm calling the Rosses
and inviting them...
251
00:14:10,684 --> 00:14:12,649
to my nonexistent place
in the Hamptons.
252
00:14:12,719 --> 00:14:15,185
Then we'll see who blinks first.
253
00:14:15,622 --> 00:14:18,418
Haven't you done enough
to these people?
254
00:14:19,593 --> 00:14:24,130
This is not about them.
Now if you'll excuse me...
255
00:14:24,197 --> 00:14:27,528
I have to exercise Jerry's gaskets.
256
00:14:31,271 --> 00:14:33,032
Vote for Kramer. Cosmo Kramer.
257
00:14:33,106 --> 00:14:35,538
I'm running for condo president.
Like your vote.
258
00:14:35,609 --> 00:14:37,199
Thanks.
259
00:14:37,644 --> 00:14:41,441
Remember, ma'am, a vote for me
is a vote for Kramer.
260
00:14:41,949 --> 00:14:44,847
- Can you cut my meat?
- Gladly.
261
00:15:13,046 --> 00:15:14,807
- Coffee?
- Sure.
262
00:15:14,881 --> 00:15:16,039
Are you black?
263
00:15:18,051 --> 00:15:19,914
Or should I bring some cream?
264
00:15:19,987 --> 00:15:23,056
I'm black. Oh, you know what?
Bring a little cream.
265
00:15:25,659 --> 00:15:27,784
- Look at that.
- Did you hear that?
266
00:15:27,894 --> 00:15:29,723
- What?
- God, there are still people...
267
00:15:29,796 --> 00:15:32,626
who have trouble
with an interracial couple.
268
00:15:32,699 --> 00:15:34,426
Interracial? Us?
269
00:15:35,602 --> 00:15:37,135
Isn't that unbelievable?
270
00:15:37,204 --> 00:15:40,671
Yes. It's awful.
271
00:15:40,741 --> 00:15:44,800
They're upset because
we're an interracial couple.
272
00:15:44,878 --> 00:15:46,570
That is racism.
273
00:15:47,547 --> 00:15:49,581
- I don't feel like eating.
- Me neither.
274
00:15:49,650 --> 00:15:52,378
Well, maybe this turkey club.
275
00:15:53,754 --> 00:15:56,482
So here I am.
276
00:15:56,556 --> 00:15:59,420
Ready to take you to the Hamptons.
277
00:15:59,493 --> 00:16:01,584
Sounds grand.
278
00:16:01,662 --> 00:16:03,127
Do you have your bathing suits?
279
00:16:03,196 --> 00:16:04,456
It's March.
280
00:16:07,100 --> 00:16:11,193
Speak now or we are headed
to the Hamptons.
281
00:16:12,506 --> 00:16:14,369
It's a two-hour drive.
282
00:16:14,441 --> 00:16:19,308
Once you get in that car
we are going all the way...
283
00:16:19,746 --> 00:16:21,711
to the Hamptons.
284
00:16:25,419 --> 00:16:27,612
All right, you wanna get nuts...
285
00:16:27,688 --> 00:16:31,622
come on, let's get nuts!
286
00:16:34,895 --> 00:16:37,293
Dad, you know, you can
program this thing to beep...
287
00:16:37,364 --> 00:16:39,022
every time you need a vitamin.
288
00:16:41,368 --> 00:16:43,163
Dad, you look so different.
289
00:16:45,072 --> 00:16:46,867
We're campaigning, Jerry.
290
00:16:46,940 --> 00:16:49,873
To rule the people,
one must walk among them.
291
00:16:49,943 --> 00:16:52,443
This is the homestretch.
Tomorrow's the election.
292
00:16:52,512 --> 00:16:55,240
Right, yeah. The poll's close
after dinner. Three o'clock.
293
00:16:55,315 --> 00:16:56,882
But then when we win...
294
00:16:56,950 --> 00:17:01,953
the celebration goes all night
until the break of 8 p.m.
295
00:17:02,322 --> 00:17:05,220
You could put that whole
schedule right in your daily planner.
296
00:17:05,292 --> 00:17:09,055
- Daily what?
- Have you read today's Boca Breeze?
297
00:17:09,329 --> 00:17:11,556
Hey, look at that.
Picture of me, huh?
298
00:17:11,631 --> 00:17:17,033
Yeah, "Candidate Cosmo Kramer,
caught barefoot in clubhouse."
299
00:17:18,105 --> 00:17:19,900
Barefoot in the clubhouse?
Kramer...
300
00:17:19,973 --> 00:17:22,166
don't you realize
this is against the rules?
301
00:17:22,242 --> 00:17:25,277
Well, I couldn't find my shoes.
302
00:17:25,345 --> 00:17:28,846
These people work and wait
their whole lives to move down here...
303
00:17:28,915 --> 00:17:33,315
sit in the heat, pretend it's not hot,
and enforce these rules.
304
00:17:33,386 --> 00:17:35,351
- Who wants hot chocolate?
- Oh, yeah.
305
00:17:36,022 --> 00:17:39,523
This is a huge scandal.
We need damage control.
306
00:17:39,593 --> 00:17:42,389
All right, look, people seem
to like those tip calculators.
307
00:17:42,462 --> 00:17:44,393
- Wizards.
- How about if we give one out...
308
00:17:44,464 --> 00:17:46,862
to every member
on the condo board?
309
00:17:46,933 --> 00:17:48,466
Kramer.
310
00:17:48,535 --> 00:17:50,227
There are 20 people on the board.
311
00:17:50,303 --> 00:17:52,598
Thank God you can get that deal.
312
00:17:53,140 --> 00:17:55,367
Payoffs. Now we're playing politics.
313
00:17:55,442 --> 00:17:58,909
All right, what do we do next,
Morty, huh? Wiretaps? Slush funds?
314
00:17:58,979 --> 00:18:00,205
First I need a nap.
315
00:18:01,148 --> 00:18:03,808
I'll get your electric blanket.
316
00:18:05,619 --> 00:18:07,812
Kramer, I can't get
that many Wizards.
317
00:18:07,888 --> 00:18:10,081
- What about your deal?
- I didn't have a deal.
318
00:18:10,157 --> 00:18:12,054
They're $200 a pop. What do I do?
319
00:18:12,125 --> 00:18:13,556
Don't worry. I know a guy.
320
00:18:13,627 --> 00:18:16,321
- Down here?
- Yeah. Bob Saccamano's father.
321
00:18:18,331 --> 00:18:21,594
And that leads
into the master bedroom.
322
00:18:21,668 --> 00:18:23,235
Tell us more.
323
00:18:23,303 --> 00:18:25,303
Wanna hear more?
324
00:18:26,139 --> 00:18:28,673
The master bedroom
opens into the solarium.
325
00:18:28,742 --> 00:18:31,538
- Another solarium?
- Yes, two solariums.
326
00:18:31,611 --> 00:18:33,338
Quite a find.
327
00:18:34,147 --> 00:18:37,512
- And I have horses too.
- What are their names?
328
00:18:41,254 --> 00:18:43,754
Snoopy and Prickly Pete.
329
00:18:45,992 --> 00:18:47,559
Should I keep driving?
330
00:18:47,661 --> 00:18:50,025
Oh, look, an antique stand.
331
00:18:50,096 --> 00:18:53,063
Pull over. We'll buy you
a housewarming gift.
332
00:18:54,401 --> 00:18:56,628
A housewarming gift.
333
00:18:56,937 --> 00:18:59,767
All right, we're taking it up a notch.
334
00:19:03,443 --> 00:19:06,171
- Long day?
- Yeah, I just worked a triple shift.
335
00:19:06,279 --> 00:19:08,040
I hear you, sister.
336
00:19:08,648 --> 00:19:10,010
- Sister?
- Yeah.
337
00:19:10,083 --> 00:19:12,981
It's okay. My boyfriend's black.
Here he is. See?
338
00:19:13,053 --> 00:19:15,087
- Hi, Elaine.
- Hey.
339
00:19:15,155 --> 00:19:17,223
- He's black?
- Yeah.
340
00:19:18,625 --> 00:19:21,216
- I'm black?
- Aren't you?
341
00:19:21,294 --> 00:19:24,124
I'll give you a couple
of minutes to decide.
342
00:19:25,799 --> 00:19:27,867
- What are you talking about?
- You're black.
343
00:19:27,934 --> 00:19:29,797
You said we were
an interracial couple.
344
00:19:29,870 --> 00:19:32,302
We are because you're Hispanic.
345
00:19:36,209 --> 00:19:38,300
- I am?
- Aren't you?
346
00:19:38,378 --> 00:19:40,309
No. Why would you think that?
347
00:19:40,380 --> 00:19:42,778
Your name's Benes. Your hair.
348
00:19:42,849 --> 00:19:45,213
You kept taking me
to those Spanish restaurants.
349
00:19:45,886 --> 00:19:47,920
That's because I thought
you were black.
350
00:19:49,389 --> 00:19:52,515
Why would you take me to a Spanish
restaurant because I'm black?
351
00:19:52,926 --> 00:19:55,688
I don't think we should
be talking about this.
352
00:19:55,762 --> 00:19:57,989
- So, what are you?
- I'm white.
353
00:19:58,064 --> 00:20:01,725
So we're just a couple
of white people?
354
00:20:02,969 --> 00:20:04,661
I guess.
355
00:20:06,673 --> 00:20:08,365
Yeah.
356
00:20:09,542 --> 00:20:11,610
- So do you want to go to the Gap?
- Sure.
357
00:20:16,483 --> 00:20:19,780
Well, I handed out all the Wizards.
358
00:20:19,853 --> 00:20:22,080
The polls close in one hour.
359
00:20:22,155 --> 00:20:25,816
I think we've got this baby
all sewn up, huh? Yeah.
360
00:20:26,993 --> 00:20:30,028
Yeah, there was an extra one.
Norman Bergerman.
361
00:20:30,096 --> 00:20:33,097
He won't be leaving any tips
where he is.
362
00:20:33,166 --> 00:20:34,858
Congratulations, Mr. President.
363
00:20:34,935 --> 00:20:38,004
Congratulations,
Mr. Puppet Master, huh?
364
00:20:38,071 --> 00:20:41,402
Hey, Morty, what's wrong
with these tip calculators?
365
00:20:41,474 --> 00:20:42,871
What are you talking about?
366
00:20:42,943 --> 00:20:46,308
It's overtipping.
I just left 5 bucks for a BLT.
367
00:20:46,379 --> 00:20:48,538
Let me see that.
368
00:20:48,648 --> 00:20:50,909
This isn't a Wizard. It's a Willard.
369
00:20:51,484 --> 00:20:55,076
It's a Willard?
Saccamano Sr. screwed me.
370
00:20:55,155 --> 00:20:56,779
Mine doesn't have a seven.
371
00:20:56,856 --> 00:20:58,150
I'm ruined.
372
00:20:58,224 --> 00:21:00,417
Jerry, why didn't you get
them Wizards?
373
00:21:00,493 --> 00:21:02,390
Because the real Wizard's $200.
374
00:21:02,462 --> 00:21:05,622
- You didn't have a deal?
- No deal. Not hot.
375
00:21:05,699 --> 00:21:09,326
Morty, you and Kramer.
You're finished.
376
00:21:09,402 --> 00:21:12,335
Everyone vote for the guy
in the wheelchair.
377
00:21:12,405 --> 00:21:15,372
- Let's go.
- The people have spoken.
378
00:21:16,209 --> 00:21:19,005
Well, that's it for me.
I'm heading back to New York.
379
00:21:22,282 --> 00:21:23,610
Dad, I'm sorry.
380
00:21:23,683 --> 00:21:24,807
You should be.
381
00:21:24,884 --> 00:21:28,613
How could you spend $200
on a tip calculator?
382
00:21:28,688 --> 00:21:31,814
It does other things!
383
00:21:44,204 --> 00:21:47,796
- Where are we, George?
- Almost there.
384
00:21:48,575 --> 00:21:50,540
This is the end of Long Island.
385
00:21:51,211 --> 00:21:52,801
Where's your house?
386
00:21:52,879 --> 00:21:56,142
We go on foot from here.
387
00:21:56,249 --> 00:21:58,010
All right.
388
00:22:09,029 --> 00:22:12,758
There's no house! It's a lie!
389
00:22:12,832 --> 00:22:15,765
There's no solarium.
There's no Prickly Pete.
390
00:22:15,835 --> 00:22:17,869
There's no other solarium.
391
00:22:17,937 --> 00:22:19,368
We know.
392
00:22:21,808 --> 00:22:27,210
Then why? Why did you make me
drive all the way out here?
393
00:22:27,280 --> 00:22:32,841
Why didn't you say something?
Why? Why? Why?
394
00:22:32,919 --> 00:22:36,045
We don't like you, George.
395
00:22:37,257 --> 00:22:41,054
And we always blamed you
for what happened to Susan.
396
00:22:45,799 --> 00:22:47,332
All right.
397
00:22:47,500 --> 00:22:49,625
Let's head back.
28087
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