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[ Y2flix.cc - Watch Movies and TV Shows Online for Free ]
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[grunts]
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In your face, Captain Armorica!
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[grunts]
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00:00:16,666 --> 00:00:18,541
[laughs]
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00:00:18,625 --> 00:00:22,041
Metadata, we've been walking
all night and I'm pooped!
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Come on, Potus.
One more attraction to check.
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00:00:24,916 --> 00:00:26,666
Oh, I can't do roller coasters.
9
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The wind in my face dries out my sinuses.
10
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Not my cuppa tea at all.
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-I like hook-a-duck or splat the rat.
-Oh, who cares? Come on, Potus!
12
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Oh, no, water! We'll end up soaking wet.
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[charming folkloric music plays]
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[sighs]
15
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♪ It's a Roman world
No, Gallic it is not ♪
16
00:00:45,750 --> 00:00:49,708
♪ Clap your hands, you must
Respect all of our laws ♪
17
00:00:49,791 --> 00:00:53,958
♪ It's a Roman world
Not an Egyptian world ♪
18
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♪ Nor Greek or African
It's just a world that's pure Roman ♪
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00:00:57,833 --> 00:01:01,875
♪ In this Roman world
Oh, wow, it is so nice ♪
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00:01:01,958 --> 00:01:05,750
♪ A wonderful world
No nothing can compare ♪
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♪ If you don't like this
Then we will impose it ♪
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♪ We'll throw you to the lions
If you cause rebellion ♪
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00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:17,916
♪ Bread and circuses
Yes, that is our motto ♪
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♪ What the crowds all want
Is to have a good seat ♪
25
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♪ It's a Roman world
Wherever… ♪
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This tune'll be stuck in my head all day.
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♪ There is nothing bad here
In this Roman world ♪
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ASTÉRIX & OBÉLIX: THE BIG FIGHT
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Hello, I am Hannabarbera.
30
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Hello, and I'm Blackangus.
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00:01:36,791 --> 00:01:38,875
Welcome to the Big Fight, everyone!
32
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So, Blackangus,
who are the two fighters competing today?
33
00:01:42,166 --> 00:01:45,958
Well, Hannabarbera,
first we've the Gaul, Vitalstatistix.
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His strength is matched by his courage.
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He's the chief of the indomitables,
36
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and he intends to remain so
until the sky falls down on his head.
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[clangs]
38
00:01:55,375 --> 00:01:57,791
And the sky might well be his challenger!
39
00:01:57,875 --> 00:02:01,541
Aye! He will face Cassius Ceramix,
the Gallo-Roman.
40
00:02:01,625 --> 00:02:06,166
And by that, I mean a Gaul
who recognizes the greatness of Rome.
41
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And whether it be in speed,
in impact, in strength,
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and, of course, in fealty to Rome,
he is our champion!
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It'll be a clash packed with action.
Won't it, Blackangus?
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Aye, Hannabarbera, it will.
45
00:02:19,291 --> 00:02:21,291
We expect to see violence,
46
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and savagery, and cruelty,
47
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as a lot of the public
have come here with their families!
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00:02:26,875 --> 00:02:30,666
[woman on Tannoy] Little Romulus's waiting
for his parents near the wolves pen.
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Little Romulus, thank you.
50
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"So, at the end of the fight,
the chief who's vanquished
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will submit control of his tribe
to the winner."
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[all chatter nervously]
53
00:02:43,000 --> 00:02:45,958
No! I'll never submit to a Gallo-Roman.
54
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I know, but we're not there yet, are we?
55
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We're not far from it.
56
00:02:49,375 --> 00:02:51,625
Our druid's still lost
all sense of reason.
57
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["You Never Can Tell"
by Chuck Berry plays]
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And without magic potion,
you won't beat Cassius Ceramix.
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With a little bit of training
I don't see why I couldn't…
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You don't stand a chance at all!
Even I'd be a better option.
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-[scoffs]
-You may just have a point.
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Oh, come on, Pidiped,
you can't be serious.
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-With no stick, he'll fall down.
-You'll see if I fall down!
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-Ow!
-No, no, he's got me thinking.
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We should change our chief.
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Huh? Change our chief?
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Yes, 'cause to win the Big Fight
we need our strongest Gaul, Obelix.
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[brash musical flourish plays]
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But… are we allowed to do that?
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-Where does it say? Hmm.
-There.
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[Geriatrix] Oh, it's engraved
in small print.
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"If need be,
the village chief can be replaced
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by any member of the tribe
who is picked for the occasion."
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-[all chatter approvingly]
-There you are! We can make Obelix chief.
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00:03:46,416 --> 00:03:48,000
What about me?
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But what about you what?
77
00:03:49,541 --> 00:03:51,416
I don't see why you don't pick me.
78
00:03:51,500 --> 00:03:53,458
Because Obelix is the only one
who can win.
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00:03:53,541 --> 00:03:55,125
How many times we gotta say it?
80
00:03:55,208 --> 00:03:58,291
Do you honestly think
he's stronger than this, eh?
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-I do.
-We should let the people decide.
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My friends, name your blacksmith
chief of this village,
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00:04:04,750 --> 00:04:07,416
and we'll regain
our strength and serenity.
84
00:04:07,500 --> 00:04:10,500
With me, Fulliautomatix, the quiet forge.
85
00:04:10,583 --> 00:04:12,041
No, no, that won't work!
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There you are, thank you.
87
00:04:13,375 --> 00:04:16,333
What this village needs
is someone who has experience.
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-Not at all!
-As the former chief of the village…
89
00:04:18,708 --> 00:04:22,333
Here we go! Same old wine
in a new bottle? No.
90
00:04:22,416 --> 00:04:26,166
Not on your nelly.
The Gauls want to see new faces.
91
00:04:26,250 --> 00:04:29,083
In that case, we might as well try
a brand-new face.
92
00:04:29,166 --> 00:04:31,500
-Like me, for example.
-I'm with you, sister.
93
00:04:31,583 --> 00:04:34,291
No… Yes, I do agree.
But not now, dear, all right?
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00:04:34,375 --> 00:04:35,958
Wait, wait, wait.
95
00:04:36,041 --> 00:04:39,791
Being the chief demands
a good relationship with the clientele.
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00:04:39,875 --> 00:04:42,250
-Oh, no, because…
-And as a fishmonger…
97
00:04:42,333 --> 00:04:43,791
You're a poisoner, huh!
98
00:04:43,875 --> 00:04:47,083
Pick me, and I'll move his shop
to the neighbouring village!
99
00:04:47,166 --> 00:04:50,000
-Oh, yeah?
-Further from the sea. Will that do?
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00:04:50,541 --> 00:04:51,625
[villagers] Ooh!
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00:04:51,708 --> 00:04:53,458
-Wait, hold on! No!
-[grunting]
102
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-No, no, no!
-[Vitalstatistix] Gauls!
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-[all clamouring]
-[sighs]
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[Hannabarbera] So here we are, Blackangus!
105
00:05:03,041 --> 00:05:04,291
Oh, yes, absolutely.
106
00:05:04,375 --> 00:05:07,916
This battle will be ugly,
and the public expect it that way.
107
00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:09,666
You're not wrong, Blackangus.
108
00:05:09,750 --> 00:05:12,708
-Is it true you've had over 90 fights?
-I have indeed.
109
00:05:12,791 --> 00:05:16,541
Five wins of the Raeburn shield,
12 executions, so I'm an old hand.
110
00:05:16,625 --> 00:05:18,541
That's very rare for a gladiator, no?
111
00:05:18,625 --> 00:05:21,250
Ah, well!
That's what I always say to the kids.
112
00:05:21,333 --> 00:05:23,083
The hardest part is to carry on.
113
00:05:23,166 --> 00:05:25,000
-I have a little question for you.
-Aye?
114
00:05:25,083 --> 00:05:27,333
How does one feel before such a fight?
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00:05:27,416 --> 00:05:31,083
Well, you gotta stay focused,
you gotta clear your head,
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and above all, you keep calm.
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[all clamouring]
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[grunting]
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-[clanging]
-[yelps]
120
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[chicken squawks angrily]
121
00:05:40,916 --> 00:05:42,000
Excuse me?
122
00:05:44,208 --> 00:05:45,375
Excuse me!
123
00:05:45,458 --> 00:05:47,250
[all yelling]
124
00:05:48,375 --> 00:05:50,541
Er, sorry to bother you!
125
00:05:53,250 --> 00:05:54,875
I'm looking for your chief.
126
00:05:55,458 --> 00:05:57,833
-Our chief?
-For the Big Fight.
127
00:05:58,833 --> 00:06:00,625
Oh, yeah, the Big Fight, sure.
128
00:06:01,125 --> 00:06:01,958
One minute.
129
00:06:02,041 --> 00:06:05,458
No rush, take your time,
I'll wait by the chariot outside.
130
00:06:05,541 --> 00:06:06,708
Cheers, thanks a lot.
131
00:06:06,791 --> 00:06:09,750
-Just outside the village.
-[Vitalstatistix] Yeah.
132
00:06:11,125 --> 00:06:12,875
Children, my wife is right.
133
00:06:12,958 --> 00:06:15,541
So you know
the fishmonger's, the blacksmith's…
134
00:06:15,625 --> 00:06:18,708
-[Vitalstatistix] We know where you are.
-I'll wait just there.
135
00:06:18,791 --> 00:06:21,166
So, I was saying, Impedimenta's right.
136
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The future of the village is at stake.
137
00:06:23,083 --> 00:06:26,583
I agree to hand over the role
of chief to Obelix.
138
00:06:27,833 --> 00:06:29,916
Has anyone actually seen Obelix?
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00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:32,458
-[Obelix] No.
-[Vitalstatistix] What do you mean, no?
140
00:06:32,541 --> 00:06:35,166
No, no, no. Asterix is right.
141
00:06:35,250 --> 00:06:38,708
I've done enough stupid things.
You deserve a better chief.
142
00:06:38,791 --> 00:06:41,750
No, Obelix.
It would be for the fight and no longer.
143
00:06:41,833 --> 00:06:43,166
No, no, no, no.
144
00:06:43,250 --> 00:06:45,166
I'm good for delivering menhirs.
145
00:06:45,250 --> 00:06:48,208
And that's all.
Huh. And I'm hopeless at that.
146
00:06:48,291 --> 00:06:50,791
[scoffs] Look, our chief isn't asking you,
147
00:06:50,875 --> 00:06:53,375
he's chosen you. So, you're our chief.
148
00:06:53,458 --> 00:06:54,416
Hmm?
149
00:06:55,375 --> 00:06:56,208
All right.
150
00:06:57,750 --> 00:06:58,625
Okay.
151
00:06:59,375 --> 00:07:00,458
All right, I accept.
152
00:07:00,541 --> 00:07:02,541
Ah! Thank you, Obelix.
153
00:07:02,625 --> 00:07:04,416
And as your chief,
154
00:07:04,500 --> 00:07:06,500
I name Asterix as our chief. There.
155
00:07:06,583 --> 00:07:07,791
Huh? Er, what?
156
00:07:07,875 --> 00:07:11,041
I'm your chief, I name you chief.
So you're chief, that's it.
157
00:07:11,125 --> 00:07:14,333
Oh, okay, I see.
Well, considering I'm your chief,
158
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I make you our chief. There.
159
00:07:16,000 --> 00:07:17,791
Hmm? And I'm reappointing you chief.
160
00:07:17,875 --> 00:07:20,041
-I re-reappoint you chief.
-No, you chief.
161
00:07:20,125 --> 00:07:21,500
-You chief! You!
-You chief.
162
00:07:21,583 --> 00:07:23,875
-Not allowed to reappoint.
-I'm one chief ahead.
163
00:07:23,958 --> 00:07:25,041
-You chief.
-You chief!
164
00:07:25,125 --> 00:07:27,625
-Chief! Chief! Chief!
-Chief! Chief! Chief!
165
00:07:27,708 --> 00:07:29,958
[both continue rapidly]
166
00:07:30,041 --> 00:07:32,583
Enough now! Stop acting like children.
167
00:07:32,666 --> 00:07:34,583
-He started it.
-He's such a liar.
168
00:07:34,666 --> 00:07:37,875
Obelix, our only hope is you.
169
00:07:37,958 --> 00:07:40,291
-You must agree to be chief.
-[exhales]
170
00:07:41,166 --> 00:07:45,500
Erm, can I open a wild boar shop,
for those people who don't like fish?
171
00:07:45,583 --> 00:07:47,291
Of course, you'd be the chief.
172
00:07:47,375 --> 00:07:49,291
But I won't have to make speeches, will I?
173
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You'll be chief.
You won't have to do anything.
174
00:07:51,958 --> 00:07:55,791
-Yes, but, will Asterix stop always…
-Finishing your sentences? Yes, Obelix.
175
00:07:57,000 --> 00:07:58,083
All right then, sure.
176
00:07:58,166 --> 00:08:01,833
[people chatter excitedly
and congratulate]
177
00:08:01,916 --> 00:08:03,916
[hopeful classical music plays]
178
00:08:06,958 --> 00:08:09,291
[grunts] There. I'm his trainer!
179
00:08:12,250 --> 00:08:15,416
[Obelix] Geriatrix, do you think
a wild boar shop is a good idea,
180
00:08:15,500 --> 00:08:17,166
as a first decision as chief?
181
00:08:17,250 --> 00:08:21,708
[Geriatrix] Eh, will you still do menhirs
and have a wild boar shop?
182
00:08:23,541 --> 00:08:25,750
[Blackangus] Well,
we're a few hourglasses away,
183
00:08:25,833 --> 00:08:29,500
or should I say, a few grains of sand away
from the beginning of the fight.
184
00:08:29,583 --> 00:08:31,875
The cheap seats are filling up
little by little.
185
00:08:31,958 --> 00:08:35,333
It's taking a while but I can feel it
in my bones that this is going to be…
186
00:08:35,416 --> 00:08:38,916
Hold on, Blackangus, I see a VIP
heading towards the red mosaic right now!
187
00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:40,916
["Whatta Man" by Salt-N-Pepa plays]
188
00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:42,458
[Blackangus] Aye, it's him!
189
00:08:42,541 --> 00:08:44,583
-[crowd cheers]
-[woman 1] Caesar!
190
00:08:44,666 --> 00:08:46,750
-[man 1] Caesar!
-[woman 2] I love you, Caesar!
191
00:08:47,708 --> 00:08:49,291
[man 2] I wanna be you!
192
00:08:51,625 --> 00:08:53,833
[Blackangus] Oh, what a handsome man!
193
00:08:58,708 --> 00:09:00,000
-There?
-Caesar!
194
00:09:00,083 --> 00:09:01,875
-Give a smile, Caesar!
-Hey, Mr. Caesar!
195
00:09:01,958 --> 00:09:03,916
-This way, this way!
-Give us a smile!
196
00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:06,291
[clicking rapidly]
197
00:09:06,375 --> 00:09:08,625
-Oh, yeah!
-Very noble.
198
00:09:08,708 --> 00:09:10,916
[paparazzo] One can see
why he's wearing laurels.
199
00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:13,125
-Simply marvellous!
-[man] Lovely!
200
00:09:13,208 --> 00:09:17,541
Not that I want to grovel at all,
but he's still extremely sculpturogenic.
201
00:09:18,875 --> 00:09:20,833
But you are kind of grovelling.
202
00:09:20,916 --> 00:09:23,125
Well, you're not wrong. You're not wrong.
203
00:09:23,750 --> 00:09:24,958
[paparazzo] Over here!
204
00:09:25,041 --> 00:09:27,083
Okay, thank you, but that's enough now.
205
00:09:27,166 --> 00:09:28,375
Julius, just one more!
206
00:09:28,458 --> 00:09:30,875
No, no more. You've had quite enough.
Julius, come on.
207
00:09:30,958 --> 00:09:32,625
[all sigh sadly]
208
00:09:32,708 --> 00:09:34,083
It's impossible to work.
209
00:09:34,166 --> 00:09:36,208
Look, look, look.
There! Look, she's coming!
210
00:09:36,291 --> 00:09:39,250
-Is it someone important?
-Of course, it is! Look, it's her.
211
00:09:39,333 --> 00:09:41,458
[woman] Cleopatra, this way please!
212
00:09:41,541 --> 00:09:42,916
Over here, Cleopatra!
213
00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:45,541
-[man 1] Look this way!
-[man 2] Can you face us as well?
214
00:09:46,583 --> 00:09:48,583
[man 3] Not just the profile,
if you please.
215
00:09:49,833 --> 00:09:50,958
This way, please.
216
00:09:51,541 --> 00:09:54,708
The referee, Twinpix, is waiting
for you inside.
217
00:09:54,791 --> 00:09:56,041
For the weigh-in.
218
00:09:57,375 --> 00:10:01,333
Okay then,
now, you can step on the scales.
219
00:10:03,833 --> 00:10:05,000
[Dogmatix whines]
220
00:10:06,208 --> 00:10:08,541
So, you're a heavyweight then.
221
00:10:08,625 --> 00:10:09,541
Really?
222
00:10:09,625 --> 00:10:10,958
And without Dogmatix?
223
00:10:11,041 --> 00:10:12,083
[panting]
224
00:10:12,791 --> 00:10:14,625
[adventurous music plays]
225
00:10:14,708 --> 00:10:17,125
[Blackangus] Oh, look, er… Barbera!
226
00:10:17,208 --> 00:10:19,958
The Gallic tribe is arriving
to see the big feat.
227
00:10:20,041 --> 00:10:22,416
And if I may add, their de-feat.
228
00:10:22,500 --> 00:10:25,000
-[both laugh]
-[Blackangus] That's funny.
229
00:10:30,875 --> 00:10:33,083
[lively classical music plays]
230
00:10:33,708 --> 00:10:36,750
[vendor 1] Kiddywinks!
Who wants a candy-floss moustache?
231
00:10:36,833 --> 00:10:39,333
It's full of sugar.
It's good for children.
232
00:10:42,125 --> 00:10:45,833
[vendor 2] Roll up, roll up,
hop in the bumper chariots!
233
00:10:45,916 --> 00:10:47,833
So if Cassius Ceramix wins today,
234
00:10:47,916 --> 00:10:50,125
it would see the conquest
of all Gaul by Caesar!
235
00:10:50,208 --> 00:10:53,958
Absolutely. So we expect to see
a fight fought with no mercy.
236
00:10:54,041 --> 00:10:55,583
And the sweet smell of triumph.
237
00:10:55,666 --> 00:10:58,375
Oh, well, er… [laughs]
I can't smell nothing.
238
00:10:58,458 --> 00:11:00,916
Not since the day
that I shoved a trident up my nose.
239
00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:04,333
Can't smell a thing.
Anyway, enough about me. [snorts]
240
00:11:05,916 --> 00:11:08,958
[vendor 3] Omen chicken!
Who wants an omen chicken?
241
00:11:09,041 --> 00:11:12,041
Yesterday's chickens tell
the news of tomorrow.
242
00:11:12,125 --> 00:11:13,291
Omen chicken,
243
00:11:13,375 --> 00:11:15,958
with the chick supplement special
on property,
244
00:11:16,041 --> 00:11:17,750
"Should I invest in Pompeii?"
245
00:11:17,833 --> 00:11:19,750
Of course, you should invest in Pompeii.
246
00:11:19,833 --> 00:11:23,666
If I could afford it, I'd get a little hut
right at the foot of the volcano.
247
00:11:23,750 --> 00:11:26,750
You wouldn't see me for dust.
It'd be a sound investment.
248
00:11:26,833 --> 00:11:28,833
I may be wrong, but I doubt it.
249
00:11:36,375 --> 00:11:40,375
Oh, what truly dreadful seats.
They are so uncomfortable.
250
00:11:40,875 --> 00:11:45,083
This is the worst birthday of my life.
Pompey wouldn't do this to his mother.
251
00:11:45,166 --> 00:11:46,125
[Caesar grumbles]
252
00:11:46,208 --> 00:11:47,750
[laughs] Here's another one.
253
00:11:47,833 --> 00:11:51,125
How do you tell the difference
between a Gaul and his wife?
254
00:11:51,208 --> 00:11:53,458
The length of their moustache! [laughs]
255
00:11:55,125 --> 00:11:57,250
And so for the rest of the program,
256
00:11:57,333 --> 00:12:00,041
after the loser hands
the shield to the winner,
257
00:12:00,125 --> 00:12:03,125
we thought we could dine tonight
in the Gaulish village.
258
00:12:03,208 --> 00:12:06,916
Really? My birthday dinner
in a village in Gaul? Charming.
259
00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:10,958
Oh, yeah! And the menu is Gallo-Roman.
Thought we'd go fusion. Yeah?
260
00:12:11,041 --> 00:12:14,083
What's fusion?
Is it good food mixed with bad food?
261
00:12:14,166 --> 00:12:16,250
Let's discuss this later, shall we?
262
00:12:16,333 --> 00:12:19,750
All right, what about this one?
A wild boar in a toga goes into a tavern…
263
00:12:19,833 --> 00:12:21,666
-[Caesar] Fastanfurius, come here.
-Mmm?
264
00:12:21,750 --> 00:12:22,958
I'll tell you later.
265
00:12:23,041 --> 00:12:25,375
[whispers] Do you have everything ready?
266
00:12:25,458 --> 00:12:27,666
Yes, all is ready, Caesar.
267
00:12:27,750 --> 00:12:29,708
[Caesar] Very good. Very good.
268
00:12:30,375 --> 00:12:33,291
[woman on Tannoy] Little Anonymus,
your parents are waiting
269
00:12:33,375 --> 00:12:34,958
at the bumper chariots.
270
00:12:35,041 --> 00:12:37,791
-Little Anonymus…
-[artist] Don't move.
271
00:12:37,875 --> 00:12:41,333
I'm nearly there,
just finishing my caricature.
272
00:12:41,416 --> 00:12:42,458
And there you are.
273
00:12:42,541 --> 00:12:43,708
[both laugh]
274
00:12:43,791 --> 00:12:45,708
-He put a lot into that!
-Oh!
275
00:12:45,791 --> 00:12:48,541
[riders exclaim and laugh]
276
00:12:48,625 --> 00:12:50,916
[both scream]
277
00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:53,000
[jolly carnival music plays]
278
00:12:53,083 --> 00:12:54,583
[both continue screaming]
279
00:12:57,541 --> 00:12:59,375
I'm sorry, Caesar.
280
00:12:59,458 --> 00:13:02,791
Would you mind if you posed
for a quick mosaic?
281
00:13:02,875 --> 00:13:04,708
No, but of course! My pleasure.
282
00:13:06,083 --> 00:13:07,583
[tiles rattle]
283
00:13:12,416 --> 00:13:13,416
[tiles rattle]
284
00:13:14,166 --> 00:13:15,625
-[tiles rattle]
-Ah.
285
00:13:21,500 --> 00:13:22,708
[tiles rattle]
286
00:13:25,166 --> 00:13:26,291
Mmm…
287
00:13:28,666 --> 00:13:29,666
[tiles rattle]
288
00:13:33,333 --> 00:13:34,333
[tiles rattle]
289
00:13:35,750 --> 00:13:38,041
I imagine you do this an awful lot.
Must be a pain.
290
00:13:38,125 --> 00:13:40,000
Well, it is our era. I'm happy to.
291
00:13:41,916 --> 00:13:44,916
This wine is tip-top.
It's fermented in a vineyard nearby.
292
00:13:45,000 --> 00:13:48,166
You'll see, it's very woody,
with fruity notes. Would you care to try?
293
00:13:48,250 --> 00:13:51,000
Excuse me, excuse me.
Metadata, a change of plan.
294
00:13:51,083 --> 00:13:52,041
I wrote it down.
295
00:13:52,125 --> 00:13:55,166
You can taste chestnut
and cherries from the Pyrenees…
296
00:13:55,250 --> 00:13:57,583
It won't be Vitalstatistix any more.
297
00:13:57,666 --> 00:14:00,416
-They have a new chief, a certain Obelix.
-[gasps]
298
00:14:00,916 --> 00:14:02,708
I'll find something less tannic.
299
00:14:02,791 --> 00:14:04,375
Oh, no! Not Obelix!
300
00:14:04,458 --> 00:14:06,708
Or Obel-nine.
301
00:14:06,791 --> 00:14:10,416
I don't know if this is an "X",
or one and ten, and that's nine.
302
00:14:10,500 --> 00:14:11,541
What's the difference?
303
00:14:11,625 --> 00:14:14,125
Huge! Obelix fell
into the magic potion pot
304
00:14:14,208 --> 00:14:15,541
when he was just a kid.
305
00:14:15,625 --> 00:14:19,333
The effects on him were permanent! Oh, no.
306
00:14:19,416 --> 00:14:21,000
It's all gone wrong.
307
00:14:21,083 --> 00:14:22,083
Not Obelix.
308
00:14:22,916 --> 00:14:25,958
Or… Or… Obe-59.
309
00:14:26,541 --> 00:14:28,458
'Cause the "L" is 50.
310
00:14:28,541 --> 00:14:29,916
Not sure.
311
00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:30,958
[sighs]
312
00:14:35,750 --> 00:14:38,000
["It's A Roman World" plays distantly]
313
00:14:38,541 --> 00:14:40,125
[both] Mmm.
314
00:14:45,041 --> 00:14:47,041
Ah! Can you watch them for a bit?
315
00:14:47,125 --> 00:14:48,416
Chief.
316
00:14:50,291 --> 00:14:53,500
[Copacetix] Blimey, they'll be brimming
with energy after all that.
317
00:14:53,583 --> 00:14:55,250
[both snore]
318
00:14:55,916 --> 00:14:58,041
Chief, let me help you.
319
00:14:58,708 --> 00:15:00,583
It's a snack for Obelix before the meal.
320
00:15:00,666 --> 00:15:02,291
-I mean, before the fight.
-Mmm.
321
00:15:02,375 --> 00:15:05,875
I can't wait for this to be over
so that we can get back to normal.
322
00:15:05,958 --> 00:15:08,208
Well, I'm starting to enjoy our life now.
323
00:15:08,291 --> 00:15:10,375
Mmm, they're delicious,
these Greek meatballs.
324
00:15:10,458 --> 00:15:11,791
Hmm. What was that?
325
00:15:11,875 --> 00:15:15,083
I think they've got some veggies inside,
but they taste great to me.
326
00:15:15,166 --> 00:15:17,875
No, the bit about enjoying
this life now. What exactly?
327
00:15:17,958 --> 00:15:19,791
I love not being chief any more.
328
00:15:20,291 --> 00:15:23,541
Asterix, being the chief
is a weight on your shoulders.
329
00:15:23,625 --> 00:15:25,500
That's what my bearers often say too.
330
00:15:26,291 --> 00:15:28,125
I don't know, I feel lighter.
331
00:15:28,833 --> 00:15:30,541
I have more time for myself,
332
00:15:30,625 --> 00:15:32,458
-I sleep better at night.
-What nights?
333
00:15:32,541 --> 00:15:35,416
You were still chief this morning.
What are you talking about?
334
00:15:35,500 --> 00:15:38,708
I'm starting to think that Obelix
should be chief of our village
335
00:15:38,791 --> 00:15:39,958
even after the fight.
336
00:15:40,041 --> 00:15:43,333
Huh? No, but… No, no.
You can't… You can't be serious.
337
00:15:43,416 --> 00:15:45,166
Oh, yeah. I'm very serious.
338
00:15:45,250 --> 00:15:48,958
No, but as a fake chief to give smacks,
he's perfect, I agree.
339
00:15:49,041 --> 00:15:52,500
But to be chief of the village?
He just doesn't have any of the skills.
340
00:15:52,583 --> 00:15:55,125
-Don't see why not.
-Well, I do and I'm telling you.
341
00:15:55,208 --> 00:15:58,666
His wild boar shop idea isn't too bad,
so we should think on it.
342
00:15:58,750 --> 00:16:00,500
-See you!
-But it's ridiculous.
343
00:16:00,583 --> 00:16:02,125
-See you!
-No, er… Chief.
344
00:16:02,208 --> 00:16:03,125
Think on it.
345
00:16:03,708 --> 00:16:04,583
[sighs]
346
00:16:05,458 --> 00:16:06,333
Think on it.
347
00:16:09,875 --> 00:16:11,625
So I don't have skills then?
348
00:16:12,291 --> 00:16:15,291
Er, I didn't… say it exactly like that.
349
00:16:15,375 --> 00:16:17,708
You did. Exactly like that.
350
00:16:18,291 --> 00:16:20,250
-And that I was a fake chief too.
-Yeah.
351
00:16:20,833 --> 00:16:22,916
-No… Yeah. No, I said…
-Fake chief.
352
00:16:23,666 --> 00:16:26,291
Yes, well, okay.
Okay, I said "fake chief".
353
00:16:26,875 --> 00:16:30,166
Look, Obelix, you can't
seriously think you'd be chief forever?
354
00:16:30,250 --> 00:16:32,083
Not forever, but why not for a while?
355
00:16:32,166 --> 00:16:34,333
-There are dozens of reasons why not.
-Why?
356
00:16:34,916 --> 00:16:37,875
You worried that for once
I'll make the decisions? Is that it?
357
00:16:37,958 --> 00:16:39,833
Yes, when you throw menhirs, I am.
358
00:16:39,916 --> 00:16:42,083
That's just so petty. Ha! Typical.
359
00:16:42,166 --> 00:16:43,125
[gasps softly]
360
00:16:43,208 --> 00:16:45,208
No one else in my tribe is worried though.
361
00:16:45,291 --> 00:16:51,125
"Your tribe"? Oh, but I'm sorry
if I offended you, o great Chief Obelix!
362
00:16:51,208 --> 00:16:55,083
If you don't like it, the doors
to my village are open, so you can go!
363
00:16:55,166 --> 00:16:57,791
Hang on, hang on.
So you want me to go, just like that?
364
00:16:57,875 --> 00:17:00,541
Banishing me from your village,
is that what you're saying?
365
00:17:00,625 --> 00:17:02,958
[Obelix laughs] You know what?
Apothika was right.
366
00:17:03,041 --> 00:17:05,666
Once again, you're talking for me.
367
00:17:05,750 --> 00:17:08,791
Well, okay!
I'll shut up then. Come on, spit it out!
368
00:17:08,875 --> 00:17:10,125
That's it, you're banished!
369
00:17:10,208 --> 00:17:12,458
[melancholic music plays]
370
00:17:13,875 --> 00:17:14,791
Hmph.
371
00:17:18,125 --> 00:17:20,125
Is that your first decision as chief?
372
00:17:26,833 --> 00:17:27,750
[sighs softly]
373
00:17:33,208 --> 00:17:38,791
[horn blares]
374
00:17:38,875 --> 00:17:40,875
[woman on Tannoy]
Please return to the arena.
375
00:17:40,958 --> 00:17:42,916
The Big Fight will begin soon.
376
00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:44,250
Thank you.
377
00:17:44,333 --> 00:17:45,833
[people chatter happily]
378
00:17:45,916 --> 00:17:48,125
♪ Living in Armorica ♪
379
00:17:48,208 --> 00:17:49,416
♪ Do-day, doo-dee ♪
380
00:17:49,958 --> 00:17:51,416
♪ Do-day, doo-da ♪
381
00:17:52,916 --> 00:17:54,250
So Mummy, do you like it?
382
00:17:54,333 --> 00:17:56,625
No. I asked for bread, it isn't here.
383
00:17:56,708 --> 00:17:58,708
My bread, yoo-hoo! Bread?
384
00:17:59,250 --> 00:18:01,250
[riders scream]
385
00:18:04,541 --> 00:18:05,916
-Call me chief.
-No, it's me.
386
00:18:06,000 --> 00:18:07,875
-No, call me chief.
-No, call me chief.
387
00:18:07,958 --> 00:18:11,583
Oh, look over there, children.
A real Gaul. That's a rare sight.
388
00:18:11,666 --> 00:18:13,375
Soon they'll all be gone.
389
00:18:13,458 --> 00:18:14,708
Call me chief!
390
00:18:14,791 --> 00:18:17,791
-Or why don't we call each other chief?
-Oh, yeah!
391
00:18:19,916 --> 00:18:21,708
[laughs] So cool to be your best mate!
392
00:18:21,791 --> 00:18:23,750
-Cooler to be your best mate.
-No, it's not!
393
00:18:23,833 --> 00:18:24,666
Yeah, it is!
394
00:18:24,750 --> 00:18:27,458
[young Asterix] That's what friends
are for, right?
395
00:18:27,541 --> 00:18:29,250
-[clucking]
-[gasps]
396
00:18:29,333 --> 00:18:30,750
-[laughs]
-[Apothika clucks]
397
00:18:30,833 --> 00:18:32,166
[horn honks]
398
00:18:32,250 --> 00:18:33,458
[dramatic music plays]
399
00:18:33,541 --> 00:18:35,625
[both laugh]
400
00:18:36,333 --> 00:18:37,833
Ah, ah, ah, ah! [clicks tongue]
401
00:18:38,500 --> 00:18:39,458
[sighs]
402
00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:41,000
[attendant] Okay.
403
00:18:41,083 --> 00:18:43,666
-[Getafix laughs]
-[Apothika quacking]
404
00:18:45,416 --> 00:18:46,291
Getafix!
405
00:18:46,375 --> 00:18:48,458
-[Getafix] Woohoo!
-Apothika!
406
00:18:48,541 --> 00:18:49,791
[suspenseful music plays]
407
00:18:49,875 --> 00:18:50,708
[groans]
408
00:18:50,791 --> 00:18:52,041
[exclaims]
409
00:18:53,458 --> 00:18:54,625
[screams]
410
00:18:54,708 --> 00:18:55,541
[chickens squawk]
411
00:18:55,625 --> 00:18:56,791
[Getafix exclaims]
412
00:18:57,458 --> 00:18:58,666
[gobbles]
413
00:18:58,750 --> 00:19:00,833
[light comic classical music plays]
414
00:19:00,916 --> 00:19:01,875
[groans]
415
00:19:05,041 --> 00:19:06,791
[Getafix laughs] Woohoo!
416
00:19:07,791 --> 00:19:09,166
[horns honk]
417
00:19:09,250 --> 00:19:10,541
Ah! [pants]
418
00:19:11,041 --> 00:19:12,416
[exclaims repeatedly]
419
00:19:13,708 --> 00:19:14,833
[groans]
420
00:19:14,916 --> 00:19:16,250
[in wild voice] Hello!
421
00:19:16,791 --> 00:19:17,625
[grunts]
422
00:19:18,291 --> 00:19:20,041
Hello again!
423
00:19:20,708 --> 00:19:23,833
[Asterix exclaims repeatedly]
424
00:19:25,416 --> 00:19:27,708
[Apothika laughs]
425
00:19:28,875 --> 00:19:29,750
Whoa!
426
00:19:29,833 --> 00:19:31,791
Whoa!
427
00:19:31,875 --> 00:19:33,458
[music peaks then stops]
428
00:19:33,541 --> 00:19:35,416
-[bell rings]
-[yells]
429
00:19:35,500 --> 00:19:37,416
Go on, kiddo, try your luck.
430
00:19:37,500 --> 00:19:40,708
You just gotta knock one of 'em down
and you win the figurine.
431
00:19:41,500 --> 00:19:42,958
-[groans]
-[child gasps]
432
00:19:43,041 --> 00:19:44,166
[yells happily]
433
00:19:44,250 --> 00:19:46,250
-[both laugh]
-All right, fair game.
434
00:19:46,958 --> 00:19:48,041
[both laugh]
435
00:19:50,958 --> 00:19:52,958
[both hum melodically]
436
00:19:53,583 --> 00:19:54,583
[groans]
437
00:19:54,666 --> 00:19:56,666
[ominous music plays]
438
00:20:00,875 --> 00:20:05,750
[gasps] Hold on. I've just got an update.
Vitalstatistix won't be fighting.
439
00:20:05,833 --> 00:20:08,291
And a new chief
will be fighting instead, Obelix.
440
00:20:08,375 --> 00:20:09,833
What? Give me that!
441
00:20:10,666 --> 00:20:12,458
Er, oh, yeah. I forgot I can't read.
442
00:20:12,541 --> 00:20:14,958
-[horn blares]
-Huh? The buccina!
443
00:20:15,041 --> 00:20:17,291
So, kids, it's about to start.
444
00:20:17,375 --> 00:20:19,416
Hooray! Enjoy the spectacle!
445
00:20:19,500 --> 00:20:21,500
[grandiose classical music plays]
446
00:20:22,291 --> 00:20:24,250
[crowd cheers]
447
00:20:28,541 --> 00:20:30,041
[crowd cheers wildly]
448
00:20:33,750 --> 00:20:34,958
[music peaks, stops]
449
00:20:35,041 --> 00:20:37,375
Wow! Magnificent!
450
00:20:37,458 --> 00:20:39,541
Ah, it still gets me, you know?
451
00:20:39,625 --> 00:20:41,291
Hey? It gives me goosebumps.
452
00:20:42,791 --> 00:20:45,458
Pompey treated his mother
to the Venice illuminations
453
00:20:45,541 --> 00:20:48,166
so let's not get over-excited
by sparklers.
454
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:51,000
[crowd cheering]
455
00:20:56,708 --> 00:20:59,541
[enunciating floridly but indistinctly]
456
00:21:04,625 --> 00:21:07,208
Sorry to be rude, we don't understand you.
457
00:21:07,750 --> 00:21:09,208
Oh, my bad. Sure.
458
00:21:09,291 --> 00:21:11,458
[grandly but clearly]
In the left-hand corner,
459
00:21:11,541 --> 00:21:13,666
in green skirt and feathered plume,
460
00:21:13,750 --> 00:21:16,291
the serum's pilum,
461
00:21:16,375 --> 00:21:17,833
stronger than the forum,
462
00:21:17,916 --> 00:21:19,750
more stable than marble,
463
00:21:19,833 --> 00:21:21,875
the most Gallo of Romans,
464
00:21:21,958 --> 00:21:24,416
the most Roman of Gallos…
465
00:21:24,500 --> 00:21:29,000
Cassius Ceramix!
466
00:21:29,083 --> 00:21:32,083
["Turn Down for What"
by DJ Snake and Lil Jon plays]
467
00:21:32,166 --> 00:21:33,375
[crowd cheers]
468
00:21:33,458 --> 00:21:35,833
Oh, yes, that was good.
We understood everything.
469
00:21:37,708 --> 00:21:40,083
[hollering rhythmically]
470
00:21:46,125 --> 00:21:47,250
[music distorts]
471
00:21:48,541 --> 00:21:51,000
-Yeah!
-[Gauls boo]
472
00:21:52,375 --> 00:21:53,291
[Cassius yells]
473
00:21:54,833 --> 00:21:55,750
[grunts]
474
00:21:58,500 --> 00:22:01,375
And in the right-hand corner,
475
00:22:01,458 --> 00:22:04,041
blue and white braccae,
476
00:22:04,125 --> 00:22:05,916
with red braids…
477
00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:08,375
Come on then, it's our turn, champ.
478
00:22:08,458 --> 00:22:10,541
The Celtic firkin,
479
00:22:10,625 --> 00:22:13,541
the menhir of Armorica,
480
00:22:13,625 --> 00:22:18,000
Obelix!
481
00:22:18,083 --> 00:22:19,000
Hmm?
482
00:22:19,083 --> 00:22:20,375
Obelix?!
483
00:22:22,166 --> 00:22:25,708
["Turn Down For What?" continues playing]
484
00:22:25,791 --> 00:22:26,750
Huh?
485
00:22:30,583 --> 00:22:33,166
[Geriatrix] Don't forget, tire him out.
486
00:22:33,250 --> 00:22:35,791
Think of your legwork.
Mind out for his right hook and…
487
00:22:35,875 --> 00:22:38,916
-I'll give him a smack.
-Oh, yeah, that works too.
488
00:22:39,000 --> 00:22:43,666
Hey, hey! Look who it is!
He's hit me loads o' times!
489
00:22:43,750 --> 00:22:46,625
Obelix, yoo-hoo!
490
00:22:46,708 --> 00:22:48,666
[stairs creaking]
491
00:22:53,416 --> 00:22:55,208
[metal strains]
492
00:22:56,333 --> 00:22:57,416
[music stops]
493
00:22:58,541 --> 00:23:00,375
[sniffs and grumbles]
494
00:23:00,458 --> 00:23:02,625
[whimpering]
495
00:23:03,208 --> 00:23:05,458
Now, come to the centre of the platform.
496
00:23:05,541 --> 00:23:08,833
[Obelix's steps thud heavily]
497
00:23:08,916 --> 00:23:11,458
Let's go over all of the moves.
498
00:23:11,541 --> 00:23:13,625
Kick, punch, neck, carpus,
499
00:23:13,708 --> 00:23:15,625
metacarpus, humerus, malleolus.
500
00:23:15,708 --> 00:23:18,750
You all right there?
Knee, head, no holds barred!
501
00:23:19,291 --> 00:23:21,708
So, no… no rules?
502
00:23:22,291 --> 00:23:25,833
The combat continues until one
of you is defeated or withdraws.
503
00:23:25,916 --> 00:23:27,791
Ah-ah! Defeat or withdrawal?
504
00:23:27,875 --> 00:23:29,166
I'd like to say "Alas"
505
00:23:29,250 --> 00:23:31,250
because we don't fight
to the death any more.
506
00:23:31,333 --> 00:23:32,958
Blackangus, things change.
507
00:23:33,041 --> 00:23:34,625
I know, I know, Hannabarbera.
508
00:23:34,708 --> 00:23:36,750
Wild beasts can't even fight now,
can they?
509
00:23:36,833 --> 00:23:38,750
A lion against an elephant, forbidden!
510
00:23:38,833 --> 00:23:40,833
Maybe 'cause it's a bit cruel to animals?
511
00:23:40,916 --> 00:23:42,916
They were fed with slaves, Hannabarbera!
512
00:23:43,000 --> 00:23:46,500
Is that cruel? Seriously?
What's the world coming to, eh?
513
00:23:46,583 --> 00:23:48,500
Maybe it makes us more human though.
514
00:23:48,583 --> 00:23:51,583
But aren't we becoming less cruel?
Just a question!
515
00:23:52,333 --> 00:23:53,250
[shell feeds back]
516
00:23:53,333 --> 00:23:55,791
So, er, Ave Caesar.
517
00:23:56,541 --> 00:23:59,208
The one about to die
salutes you, as they say.
518
00:23:59,291 --> 00:24:01,208
So, er, Ave then.
519
00:24:03,125 --> 00:24:04,458
Your turn, Obelix.
520
00:24:05,000 --> 00:24:06,375
Er, what do I do?
521
00:24:06,458 --> 00:24:09,541
Your speech to the crowd.
It's your turn, we're all ears.
522
00:24:09,625 --> 00:24:11,791
-[man in crowd] Speech!
-A speech?
523
00:24:13,333 --> 00:24:15,458
-[Vitalstatistix exclaims excitedly]
-Asterix…
524
00:24:18,125 --> 00:24:19,541
[whines curiously]
525
00:24:19,625 --> 00:24:21,000
[tense music plays]
526
00:24:24,125 --> 00:24:25,000
This menhir…
527
00:24:25,083 --> 00:24:26,458
[panting]
528
00:24:26,541 --> 00:24:28,041
Oh, no, Obelix!
529
00:24:29,500 --> 00:24:31,833
Right, er… [clears throat] Okay.
530
00:24:32,833 --> 00:24:35,750
Gentlemen, have a good fight.
531
00:24:35,833 --> 00:24:40,083
[audio fades] And when you hear
the buccina, you can rumble!
532
00:24:40,666 --> 00:24:42,708
[horn blares distantly]
533
00:24:42,791 --> 00:24:44,583
[heart beating]
534
00:24:50,416 --> 00:24:52,000
[high-pitched ringing]
535
00:24:55,541 --> 00:24:56,583
[audio distorting]
536
00:24:56,666 --> 00:24:58,791
[heart beats rapidly]
537
00:25:03,291 --> 00:25:04,291
[crowd gasps]
538
00:25:05,083 --> 00:25:06,083
[gasps]
539
00:25:10,250 --> 00:25:11,333
One…
540
00:25:11,416 --> 00:25:12,833
[suspenseful music plays]
541
00:25:17,375 --> 00:25:18,250
Two…
542
00:25:22,166 --> 00:25:26,583
He didn't touch him! What is this?
No blows, no bites, nothing!
543
00:25:26,666 --> 00:25:29,083
Come on! I'm 27 and I've never seen that!
544
00:25:29,166 --> 00:25:31,375
-Four!
-[Geriatrix] Come on, get up!
545
00:25:31,958 --> 00:25:33,208
What are you doing?
546
00:25:33,291 --> 00:25:34,208
[Twinpix] Five!
547
00:25:37,083 --> 00:25:38,500
Six!
548
00:25:40,416 --> 00:25:43,416
-Seven!
-It's rubbish! What is going on?
549
00:25:43,500 --> 00:25:45,083
I can't believe my eye!
550
00:25:45,166 --> 00:25:46,125
[Twinpix] Eight!
551
00:25:46,208 --> 00:25:47,166
[whines]
552
00:25:47,250 --> 00:25:49,250
Nine!
553
00:25:49,333 --> 00:25:51,250
Obelix!
554
00:25:52,708 --> 00:25:54,625
-And ten!
-[bell rings]
555
00:25:54,708 --> 00:25:57,458
It's over!
556
00:25:58,500 --> 00:25:59,458
So I won?
557
00:25:59,541 --> 00:26:00,958
[triumphant music plays]
558
00:26:01,041 --> 00:26:03,541
[grunting in joy]
559
00:26:03,625 --> 00:26:04,500
[gasps]
560
00:26:10,375 --> 00:26:12,916
[music peaks, stops]
561
00:26:15,125 --> 00:26:17,541
[lively classical theme music plays]
562
00:26:48,125 --> 00:26:50,541
ASTERIX & OBELIX: THE BIG FIGHT
563
00:27:28,750 --> 00:27:32,000
[musical arrangement turns
sweeping and sentimental]
564
00:29:52,333 --> 00:29:54,333
[upbeat Celtic folk music plays]
41840
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