All language subtitles for [SubtitleTools.com] (eng)Comet 2014 1080p BRRip x264 DTS-JYK

This is not a dream.

This is not a dream.

This is not a dream.

This is
not a dream.

This is not a dream.
This is not a dream.

How did I get here?
I don't know.

Some...somebody
just transferred me here.

I don't want to give you
my information again.

I just told someone
five times.

Can one of you behave
like a real person, please?

I'm calling about...

Right, yes. I'm her son.

What kind of cancer
are we talking about?

Well, what are her options?

What about a liver transplant?

Why not?

Ask about her Child-Pugh score.
Trust me.

What's her Child-Pugh score?

AB. Uh...

What about
her bilirubin levels?

If they're low enough,
they might consider yttrium-90.

Hold on. You know,
you have really bad social skills.

Can you at least pretend to
not listen to my conversation?

Nobody likes that guy.
Don't be that guy. Eyes on the prize.

Yeah.

What about yttrium-90?

Her bilirubin levels
are too high?

OK. Listen. I'm gonna
get on a flight in the morning.

So I should be at the hospital
by 3:00.

But just have her call me tonight,
so I know I'm wanted.

Thanks.

- Fuck!
-This is about your mom?

Yeah.

- How long are they giving her?
-I don't know. A few years.

- I'm so sorry.
-Yeah.

What are you doing?

I got to roll a joint before
the meteor shower starts.

- Why?
-What kind of question is that?

We're about to watch
a fucking meteor shower. "Why?"

Oh, here.

It's for when you apply to college
in a few years.

USE me 8S a YGfGFGHCG.

You're a postdoctoral scientist
at Tristana Pharmaceuticals.

- Yep.
-So you already...

Oh, that cancer-y stuff.
Yeah, I did.

Anyway, uh,
I should be able to help you

get into top 10 pre-med
in a few years.

What makes you think
I want to go pre-med?

Well, other than the fact
that you knew what yttrium-90 is

when most of your peers
are still...battling to crack

the mysteries of
parallel parking?

That's just because my mom...

Your mom died of liver cancer.
Yeah. I know.

Your book bag
has a cancer ribbon pinned to it.

It can only be
a picture of your mom.

Fits the age range.
You guys have the same nose bridge.

Makes sense you want to
become a doctor that saves people.

Right? Make up for the doctor
that couldn't save your mom.

You know, in time,
those good intentions will fade

and become about the money,
it always does,

and you become bitter,
like everyone always becomes.

And then you die,
probably from cancer.

You know, 'cause that's ironic.

-ls something wrong with you?

Probably, yeah.

Don't worry.
I'm working on it.

I just fired my therapist.

She was such an idiot, though.

She diagnosed me with

narcissistic personality disorder.

Said I'm under
the grand delusion

that I'm the smartest person
in the world.

To which I responded,
"What if I really am?"

- You know?
-Hey. Over here.

Watch out!

You OK?

You alright?

This...this doesn't feel real.

What?

I feel like my life
just flashed before my eyes.

You know, like in a movie

where the main character dies
in the beginning

but he keeps going,
not realising he's dead.

Like, what's that movie
I'm talking about?

You know what I mean.
It's like...

- What is it? it...it's...
-Oh, uh, sure. Uh...

Yeah, like Bruce Willis
in 'The Sixth Sense'.

Exactly, yeah. Wait, no.
You know what? I never saw that.

Shit. That's the twist
that everyone was talking about?

Bruce Willis dies
in the beginning of that? That sucks!

Oh, I really wanted to see that.
Fuck!

Sorry. I guess I just thought
everyone had seen it.

Oh, don't worry.
No, I'm not that mad. No.

I mean, I am,
but I'll get over it. Sorry.

That's a lie. I'll...

I'll probably harbour this
for a few more months at least.

And then...you know,
we'll see...see what happens.

That's cute.
You have an eating problem?

No. Not like... I'm... Sorry.
I shouldn't have said that.

Dude. Come on.

You do realise my date
isn't the one

with the eating problem,
right?

Oh.

What? Uh-oh.
Kimberly's annoyed.

Kimberly?

Kimberly?

Hey.

- How do you do that?
-What?

I haven't seen you
in a year when...

I was literally
just thinking about you.

- Gosh. Really?
-Yeah, because of that song.

I was listening to it
as I was walking here,

and it reminded me
of the hotel.

The one we stayed at
for my friend's wedding in Paris.

Yeah, yeah. Paris.
The City of Lights.

And pretension, as I recall.

We had one of
our biggest fights.

And that was your friend's wedding
from Wisconsin, right?

What was her name?
Lenora or Leonora?

- Sarah? Right.
-Right. I remember that wedding.

I remember that was the one
where the DJ

played that Montell Jordan song
twice.

Remember, the first time,
we thought it was ironic,

and then we realised
he just liked the song.

Definitely our biggest fight.

The beginning of the end,
really.

Yeah. Yeah.

Look, it's like
the Beatles, right?

I mean, I liked them
when I was five.

But at a certain point,
you just want something

with a little more nuance,
you know?

Don't get me wrong -
I could handle them a little better

when they had Pete Best
to ground them,

but past that, I don't know -
they just got so...pedestrian.

- Do you come here a lot?
-Do I come to the cemetery?

I like cemeteries, you know.

They're romantic.
Especially this one.

Soccer is by far
the most elegant sport.

It's gonna overtake football in America
in the next two years.

Oh, God. Really? Two years?

A friend of mine
described it perfectly.

Clock's ticking.

He blogs, "Soccer's...

-"Soccer's chess on the field."
-Oh.

Do you have any vomit bags
in there?

I guess we could just throw...
I'd hate to throw up at a grave.

Why didn't you just go to
the Griffith Park Observatory, then,

to watch the meteor shower?

Well, they have assholes there too.
Trust me.

And there are assholes
all over this city,

but rarely do you get to be
next to one so spectacular.

Only knock on him, I have to say,
he's from New York.

I can't stand that place.
Seriously. It's so overrated.

Why, because of all the bridges
and the culture

and the history they have?

Who needs it?
I'll take Orlando any day.

They got so many more
TGI Fridays.

That's why I love L.A.
Los Angeles is just more...

- Oh, no.
-Modern.

There's a relevancy about it.
New York doesn't have any...

Kimberly, I was wondering
if I could have your number.

- What?
-Your phone number.

Dude.

She's with me.

No.

Uh, yeah. She is.

No, she's not.
Not yet anyway.

At best,
this is a first date,

and I'm shocked that
that even happened.

I have nothing against you.
You might not be a bad guy.

Most likely, but maybe not.
You're incredibly handsome.

You were probably very handsome
when you were a kid too.

I think that explains your lack
of substance and personality.

Only because nobody's ever
really challenged you before.

So now as an adult,
you think everything you say

means something,
but it means nothing, actually.

You don't know what you're
talking about, it's upsetting,

and I think she probably
sees through that.

You're very pretty,
but you're shallow beyond belief.

Anyway, can I have
your number?

-What are you doing?

You just said all that shit.

Yeah, but it was
just an observation.

And you ask my girl out
in front of me?

Shit. Sorry. My mistake.
I see that now.

I shouldn't have done that.
She's way too beautiful.

- What?
-I should be more of a realist.

I should know I'm a C,
maybe a C+ in winter,

when I can cover up
my body more.

Even though you're a douchebag,
you're incredibly attractive,

so maybe it's only fair
you two pair.

What? It rhymed.

She's right. It rhymed.
Alright. Let's...

Can you just put me down?
This is...

This is embarrassing now
for everyone.

OK. Come on, Josh.
The line's moving. Let's just go.

- Come on.
-Wanna get a good seat.

The only thing wrong with you
is you're a chickenshit.

- That's all.
-it's not the only problem.

- Let's go. Excuse me. Excuse me.
-it's one of many.

- You OK?
-Yeah. I shouldn't talk.

That's when
I get into trouble.

I'm sorry I made fun of
your sandwich bag.

I didn't mean to.
That's not true. I did.

Sorry. I'm really nervous.

It's OK.
Well, I'm sorry he bothered you.

Oh. I'm not nervous
because of him.

OK. 'Bye.

She is so...

...beautiful.

Kim, come on.
The Wedding's in an hour.

- You got to get ready.

So...have you ever
dreamt about me?

- Dreamt about you?
-Yeah.

You know, in the 700+ days
we've dated.

You ever dreamt about me?

So...
Yeah, of course.

Oh, yeah? Like, uh...
like, sex dreams?

At first, but then we had sex
and that went away.

Ha. Is that how you
really want to say that?

I was all hot to trot for you,
or whatever, in the beginning,

and now, you know,
reality set in.

That's not what I meant.
I meant, like...

- I got it.
-A dream, like...

Ambiguous depictions
of what we are,

or were, or could be,
stuff like that.

Will you stop it already?
I got it.

- Why, I oughta...
-Hey! Whoa.

Put that down.
You're not yourself.

- What are you doing with that?
-I'm gonna give you what-for.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah.

We good?

OK.

OK. That was fun.

Does it bother you
that you don't make me happy?

- Always with the jokes.
-I'm serious.

Seriously, you went from sex dreams
to not being happy.

False. I wasn't talking about sex dreams.
You were.

And, secondly, I'm a girl,
so, yes, we're non sequitur.

- Ah, that's a little clichéd.
-I want a baby.

- Point taken.
-Seriously.

Don't you want a baby?

Some day, sure.

But let's...let's burn that bridge
when we get to it, OK?

See? Not making me happy.

How do you do that?
How do you do that?

Oh, my God, she's beautiful.
She's beyond beautiful.

She's real.
And she seems funny too.

And just have a hint of crazy.
I can feel it.

Beautiful, crazy and funny.

Jesus Christ, she's perfect.

It's really annoying.
Really...

That's...two near collisions for you now
in a row.

At least this one's not fatal.

OK.

-' Bye.
-Yeah.

What the fuck was that?

Comets were observed before
in ancient times by many...

Wait. Wait.

What are we doing?

Are we into chasing now?
What are we doing?

Hey. Just stop for a second.

I saw...
I thought I saw somebody,

a friend of mine, behind you,
coming over, so...

Well, that's why
I turned around and waited.

So, what's the big deal?

Wasn't because
you were watching me?

It looked like you were
kind of watching me.

No. It was because of a friend
that was behind you.

Well, so they're...so they're
not there now, obviously.

Besides, you were being weird.
You were talking to yourself.

- What were you saying anyway?
-You know, you say 'so' a lot.

-It's really annoying.
-So, do...

Are you trying
to make this awkward now?

- It feels awkward now.
-Awkward feels good to me.

And awkward
feels awkward to me.

That's a little on the nose,
don't you think?

I'm not trying to fuck you.

If that's what you're worried about.
I mean...

I'm not gonna ask you out,
because I don't believe in love.

I think all relationships
deteriorate

into hate, indifference or...

Well, yeah, those two things.

My parents have been together
for 32 years.

- And they are happily in love.
-No, they're not.

- Yes, they are.
-No, they're not.

If they haven't divorced by now,
probably means they've just

surrendered to the fact
that being apart is much better

than being together -
you know, the lesser of two evils.

It's like an emotional holocaust
between your parents right now.

They probably have
lukewarm feelings about you too.

- I'm Dell, by the way.
-So...

No offence, but I have a...
a thing about shaking hands.

Oh, my God.
You ARE a little crazy.

- That's great.
-You're not impressing me.

- I disagree.
-You know...

You should stop trying to sound so smart
all the time.

You just wind up
sounding really dumb.

I realised
why you date guys like that.

You have terrible taste in men
'cause you're superficial.

You're fooling yourself
in the hopes

of finding
something redeemable.

It's 'cause of love.
That's your blind spot.

You gotta give up on that.

Wow. OK.

Well, I thank you
for your insight, stranger,

but...l actually believe
love is real.

- I'm gonna go now.
-Wait.

Can I still get your number?

- Hello, boyfriend.
-Hey.

Hey. Listen, uh...Roxette's on
and the good part's coming up.

- Can I call you back?
-Wait, wait, wait.

I have to tell you something
more important really quick.

That book I'm reading,
'The Selfish Gene', Richard Dawkins.

There was this fascinating part
I just read about memes.

He basically says
that ideas are like genes

that self-replicate and mutate

like a...like a...cultural form
of evolution.

I was thinking about
how that applies to us,

you know, the idea of us,

how we've...we've really
mutated and evolved.

Because if you think about it,

we were just dumb young kids
when we first met,

then we broke up, got back together,
blah, blah, blah,

and now, now we're this
really mature, loving couple

who's grown respect
and admiration for each other -

you know what I mean?

Kimberly?

You hung up on me,
didn't you?

Well, maybe you could.

Well, because I'd like her to be
at the best place.

Well, then, maybe you could
introduce me to the head guy

at the cancer
and immunology lab.

Because I've taken an interest.
That's all.

Yes, Mom, I meditated.
Yeah, I meditate before every date.

But it didn't help.
Face facts.

No-one thinks I'm special
but you.

Well,
I'm still technically on it,

but it's not working out,
trust me.

He...called himself
a Bob Dylan song

and then proceeded to call me
a Britney Spears song.

I don't know what that means either,
but it sounds insulting.

No, not him.
The one with glasses, moustache.

Looks like a child trafficker.

Yeah. Yeah. That's the one.

Well, if I...

I got to go. I got to go.

Can I ask you
a serious question?

Do you think I have
terrible taste in men?

OK. I'm back.

Uh-huh.

- Well, I'm at...
-I have to talk to you.

- I'm on the phone.
-No... It's really important.

- Really important.
-I'm on the frickin' phone.

Have you ever cried at one of
these things? I was wondering.

Mom, I have to go.
Something weird is happening.

- One of what things?
-These meteor shower things.

- Cried?
-Yeah.

You know, like, tears of joy,
that kind of thing.

No. I've never cried
at one of these things.

Yeah, no.
Either have I, ever, ever.

In fact, I don't understand
people that do it.

It's kind of bullshit,
happy crying, isn't it?

What are you...what are
your thoughts on that?

So...l was on the phone.

So, yeah,
you were on the phone.

Sorry. Was it important?

More important
than your question?

- Yes.
-Yes.

My mistake. Sorry.

- I'll never interrupt you again.
- Thank you.

-Well...

- I should get back to my date.
-I want to keep talking to you.

- What?
-For multiple reasons.

You're beautiful, but it's more
than that, I promise.

Well, that's very nice,
but I should go.

Maybe I'll see you
in the winter, when you're a C+.

Oh. See? I knew it.
I knew you were superficial. I told you.

The only reason you're talking to me
is you think I'm hot.

The only reason why you won't
is because you think I'm not.

Fine. Give me a reason
why I should.

I was saying,
"Don't miss her."

When you saw me talking
to myself, "Don't miss her."

I'm always afraid I'm gonna miss
the important things in life,

and something about you has given me
a heightened curiosity

to know you better, and that is
a near-impossible feat

when it comes to me,
'cause I hate getting to know people.

But I can tell
you're not like the others.

- What others?
-People.

People? You can tell
I'm not a person?

Yeah.
You're not phoney like them.

I didn't say you were hot.
I said you're beautiful.

When is this dumb thing
gonna happen?

It's a beautiful night, though.

What?

I never know that means,
people saying it's a beautiful night.

What does that mean?

So... Well, to me...

It means it's...
it's comfortable, familiar.

Yet deeply moving.

Right. No, I feel you.
Like, um...

Like I'm stoned
and listen to Steely Dan.

No. Nothing at all like that.

Not like... No. I know.
More like an... Yeah.

Like...floating down
a serene lake in a rowboat

when the sun is setting

or like when the sun is...
being a part of nature.

- Stop speaking.
-Yep.

It's beautiful when
the weather's not hot or cold.

Kind of like you don't notice it,
kind of like it's perfect

'cause everything's
so balanced.

You don't even feel it.

And while you're feeling
that non-feeling...

...you look up in the sky

and you almost think,

"That's why,"

because how everything is
right now,

all the stars
and planets

and us and the ground
and the cells and molecules...

Right now...

...is exactly the reason.

Right now is comfortable.

You're a now person.

- True.
-Yeah.

See, I'm a five-minutes-from-now
person,

because five minutes from now,

a gust of wind could come
and blow H1 N1 in everyone's eyes.

Right.
Except that's highly unlikely.

Or five minutes from now,
an earthquake could erupt

and swallow us all whole.

Right. Except that... Shit.
That could actually happen.

Yeah - the point is
I'm way too anxious about

what could happen five minutes
from now to be content with now.

Can't do it.

What if something good happens

five minutes from now?

- Can't that happen?
-No.

What did you think
was gonna happen

five minutes
before you met me?

Just really paranoid
I'm gonna miss it.

I miss things a lot.

I don't care if I miss it
because“.

You're a now person. Got it.

So, another weird thing -

I don't mind your pessimism

as much as I usually mind pessimism.

That's great. I hate people
who think I'm too negative.

Also, I like your hat.

Yeah, I'm probably gonna
fall in love with you.

Wow.

That's it?

What were you hoping for?

"I'm going to
fall in love with you too?"

No, but...

Well, yeah.

So all that stuff about
not believing in relationships...

That's just
a pick-up line.

Do we have a deal, then?

'Cause you said you believe in love.
I don't.

So let's put it to the test-
date each other, me and you,

in a relationship.

Let's do it.

Why the hell
am I shaking your hand?

I should be scared to death
of who you are as a person.

Instead, I'm scared to death
of weddings - death, literally.

I'd probably have a coronary

right as I was
walking up the aisle.

Oh, God.
Please invite me to your wedding.

I'd love to see that.

Well, that's morbid and telling.

Yeah, well, if snuff films
were readily available,

I'd probably watch 'em -
not gonna lie.

- Is that a deal-breaker for you?
-No.

Because for some reason,
I still happen to be in love with you.

No, it's because
you didn't think

you'd be the one
marrying me.

Wait. You don't smoke weed.

What are you doing?
Don't do that.

- So do you still love me?

I tell you all the time.

If you died right now,
I'd visit your grave every single day.

Not every day. It's crazy.

That doesn't
answer the question.

Of course I love you.

It never sounds real
when you say it.

Like it doesn't exist.

So, what are you doing here?

I'm going up north.

- Why would you do that?
-I don't know.

- You don't know?
-I... Of course. I'm kidding.

I'm gonna...
I'm gonna meet someone.

So... Right. OK.

- How's your mom doing?
-Uh, she's actually fine.

I can't believe I haven't
talked to you this long.

Her doctors were huge idiots,
so I took matters in my own hands.

I figured out a way to dose her
with that experimental drug

we were developing
in the lab.

Wait. Are you allowed
to do that?

No.

Wasn't that...
extremely dangerous?

- Yeah. Oh, yeah.
-Well, she's fine now?

Yeah, completely.
She's in remission. So...

- Dell, that's great.
-Yeah.

I mean, other than
the totally unethical

recklessly risking your mom's life part,
that's...that's...

- You...y0u saved her.
-Yeah, I guess.

We should probably keep that
between us, by the way,

just because
there's a good chance

what I did was illegal...ish.

Right.

-Oh.

- All aboard!
-Right.

- Uh...
-We should probably...

OK, right.

Well, still. Wow.

Can't believe
you're curing cancer now.

Does that mean
you've stopped hating people?

Not at all.

Kill Zelda Fitzgerald.

Right?

- Who is that?
-Really?

I don't know who that is.

F. Scott Fitzgerald's
annoying...wife.

- Oh, really?
-Yeah.

I'd definitely marry
Rita Hayworth.

- Great hair.
-Hair, right.

Guys love her hair.

I definitely have to
shit out of this one.

- Olga Kordenstitch? Who is that?
-I don't know.

I've just always
wanted to fuck an Olga.

I would definitely
marry Tupac.

Kimberly Shakur.

It's got a good ring to it.

I would definitely eff
Edward R. Murrow.

I picture him
starting up sex with,

"Goodnight and good luck."

I'd probably laugh so much
that I'd have an orgasm

right then and there.

From the laughter, you know?

I lied about
not seeing 'The Sixth Sense'.

- You saw it?
-Of course I saw it.

Everybody saw it.
It's amazing.

Who didn't see
'The Sixth Sense'?

Why would you lie
about that?

I read in a woman's magazine
that every relationship,

whether it be short-term
or long-term,

there's usually one big lie
relative to that relationship,

and I just...l wanted to
get mine over with, I guess.

Why would you want to
get a jump start on the lying?

Because of...

Oh, because of
five minutes from now.

Well, yeah.

You're assuming that we're in
a relationship, or going to be,

when I'm still technically
on a date with someone else,

which I should probably
be getting back to, by the way.

What about the handshake?
We shook hands. You can't do that.

- I was leading you on.
-That's really fucked up.

- That's the business.
-Well, what about a friendship?

Actually,
what am I talking about?

I definitely don't
want to be friends with you.

I was raped, in high school,

by the quarterback
of the football team.

Jesus!

I know.

That is a terrible lie.

Hey. How do you know
that's a lie?

You were raped in high school

by the quarterback
of the football team?

I don't think after-school
specials are that cliché.

You couldn't have gone with,
like, a cornerback

or a defensive end
or something?

Well, I was just trying
to get mine over with.

- Your what over who?
-My lie to you.

- You can't.
-Why can't?

Because I saw it coming,
'cause we just talked about it.

You're very good at this.

You got to wait until I'm in
a completely vulnerable position

where I'd really
fall for it.

- Sounds really dangerous.
-Oh, yeah.

That's the problem
with relationships.

- Danger?
-Or worse.

- Worse?
-You change the other person.

You are a very broken man, Dell.

In theory.

Speaking of broken men,

your goateed philistine
is sashaying toward us.

- Run. Run! Run!
-What? What?

Well, that's settled.

Want a hit?

No way.

It has a weird effect on me.

For some reason, when I'm high,
I think people can't hear me

and I start speaking
really loudly.

Do you remember
memorising phone numbers?

I don't remember the last time
I memorised a phone number.

Yeah, I don't either, actually.
Remember...

Remember checking the newspaper
for movie show times?

Can remember that.

Or writing people those notes
in those, like,

folded-up triangles

and then...putting them
in their lockers?

Do you think
kids still do that,

as opposed to
just emails or texts?

No way. It's all about
emails and texts.

Those goddamn hugs and kisses.

Oh, I hate those things.

Whenever anybody emails me
hugs and kisses,

I want to just email them back
oral and penetration.

Are we old?

Are we talking
like old people?

Are we on the verge of joining
the sweatpants culture?

Was I just saying something?

- What? What'd I say?
-Give me that.

- Why?
-Give me that. OK.

That's it for you. Mmm.

I think you should, uh...

You should start drinking
some coffee.

-That's why I hate time.

I believe
I want to have sex with you.

Oh, I share in that belief.

Hey. Hey. OK.

- What?
-Yeah. We got to get ready.

- Come on.
-What the eff?

I thought we were
gonna make it.

I know,
but we got to go, Kim.

Really.

What's that?

What is that?

You ordered Chinese food?

Who orders Chinese food
in Paris?

Kim, they're gonna have dinner
at the wedding, you know,

the wedding that we're supposed
to go to in half an hour.

And you just ate lunch.
You're not full?

What does that
have to do with anything?

Jesus. This is the pot talking.
You shouldn't have smoked.

I knew it. You got to get ready.
What are you doing?

You made me promise to get you
there on time, no matter what.

- You warned me you'd do this.
-See? This is why I hate time.

I can't enjoy my sesame chicken
because of that.

Kim.

I wish I could just...
stop it or something.

Or at least just make it pause
when needed, like now.

Really, I'd just
get rid of it altogether.

You want to get rid of time?
How would you do that?

You know how there's
time-based art?

Movies, music, plays -
it's all time-based art.

There's a beginning
and a middle and an end.

And you have to see it
from beginning to end.

You're restrained
to that time line,

that way of experiencing it.

But then there's paintings -
no beginning, no middle, no end.

You see what you want to see
when you want to see it.

No restrictions.
It's just there.

OK. So you want life
to be a painting.

Great.

Come on.

Thanks.

So do you know
you really love me?

So, what's in your pocket?

My wallet.

It's stuffed with
our saved movie ticket stubs

'cause I'm a romantic
like that.

- Can you please get ready?
-Shh!

Can't you see
I'm trying to touch my toes?

I don't want to be that couple
that's always late for things.

Can we please not be
that couple?

At least for the tenure
of our relationship. Please?

You did it again.

What? What? I'm just saying
I want us to respect time.

- Not that.
-OK. What, then?

What did I do that I did
twice now and still not know?

You said
"the tenure of our relationship".

You keep speaking about
our relationship as if it's ending.

OK. You see how this relates to
the time thing?

Why don't you take
your own advice

and instead of seeing
a beginning, middle and an end,

just see it as a painting.

-Kimberly, what are you doing?

We're gonna be late! And I'm
gonna somehow get blamed for it.

I know it.

What...what are you reading?

Roald Dahl short stories.

So is it about a girl -
you're going up north, new girlfriend,

you're not telling me
'cause you think it'll make it awkward?

Right.

Yeah.

So, right? OK.

- A girl.
-I love Roald Dahl.

It's the best.
Which one are you reading?

And are you sleeping
with anyone?

The one about Hitler. And yes.

Shit.

I didn't know
he wrote one about Hitler.

Well, kind of.

Well, it's about this doctor
that saves this woman's life.

She's on the verge of death
through the whole delivery.

And this doctor is so determined
to save this woman's life

and the life
of her unborn child, right?

But...it turns out...
the child's Hitler.

OK. Did you just
give away the ending?

How can I tell you
what it's about

without giving away
the ending?

What are you talking about?

Just say it's a story about
a doctor who saves a woman

from a potentially fatal pregnancy.

- That's what the story's about?
-It is.

False, birdbrain.
That is not what the story's about.

It's about the...irony
that the baby's Hitler.

- OK. You're mad.
-I'm not mad.

- You're mad 'cause of the girl.
-I'm seeing a guy - Jack.

- You're seeing a Jack?
-He's an executive at MTV.

Looks like a cross
between Salvador Dali

and Dwayne Wayne
from 'A Different World', which is hot.

That's a weird combination.

I got to go to the bathroom
really quick.

Oh, that...fucking hurt.

- What?
-You hung up on me.

- What happened?
-Because.

OK, you realise that's not
an answer to my question, right?

What is it
I can help you with, sir?

Have I told you
how much New York reminds me

of why I hate L.A.
so much?

No, please do, because
the New Yorker who opines

the inferiorities of Los Angeles
is bursting with originality.

I'm serious, Kimberly.
We gotta move here.

It is the fucking best.
It's enough already with L.A.

It's like a mix of
moral nihilism and Disneyland.

- So are you.
-Hey. Uh...

Did I tell you
the proof of concept on our drug

passed with flying colours?

There's actually a bidding war
between a few pharmas right now.

Looks like we could be licensing it
for close to 25 million.

- Money for soul seems like...
-An even swap.

Yes. It's not like
I'm not happy for you.

But you did already tell me this
all this morning, remember?

- Did I really?
- Uh-huh.

Oh, shit.
Short-term memory must be shot.

What with the smoking pot
and whatnot.

I'm your new
second-term girlfriend, man.

Aren't you supposed to be,
like, impressing me still?

Your second-term boyfriend
just told you he made his bosses

close to $25 million today.

- I'm not materialistic.
-Yeah, I know that.

But $25 million sort of...

...I don't know,
makes that sound retarded.

OK, seeing as there's
no new information in this call,

I am gonna go -
I'm almost at the gun range.

Hey - don't you think it's cute
that you own a gun card

and I own a pot card?

Now you sound retarded.

Listen, we should probably
stop saying 'retarded'.

I'm starting to feel
like an asshole.

Oh, is that
just now starting?

What's going on?
You sound off.

- You're off.
-No, no, no. I'm serious.

Cadence is all over the place.

You sound a little like
Ms Teschmacher

when she betrayed
Lex Luthor.

Something's wrong.
I can tell.

What's going on?

God, this is gonna blow.

- What's going on?

Oh, shit.
This is bad, isn't it?

This is, like,
infidelity bad.

I definitely heard a silence
just now.

- What is going on?

- You OK?
-Yeah. You OK?

So...

-it's been a while.
-Yep.

- Glad you're finally here.
-Yeah. Me too.

Been trying to get a hold of you
for a long time now.

Do you want a tour
of the place?

- No.
-Oh. OK.

- Seriously?
-Oh, yeah.

You know I don't care about
stupid shit like that.

Sorry. I have adjusted to
normal people.

So your presence
is gonna take some realignment.

- Are you moving?
-Uh...

No. Kind of. Uh...

Do you want anything,
by the way, like, uh...

I want to talk.

What?

Nothing. For a second, I...

I forgot
what you looked like.

For the record, I've never
forgotten what you look like.

OK. Chill out, OK?
I didn't sleep with anyone.

OK. Did you see and/or touch
another man's penis in any way?

Really? Out of all the things you want to know,
this is what you want to ask most?

What kind of question's that?

Of course that's what
I want to know the most.

No. Penises
were not involved.

Were your boobs
and/or vagina?

No! It was...texts.

That's all it was.

Damn! I should never have
gone against my own advice.

I should always be the better-looking one
in the relationship.

I just sort of
hit an impasse on that.

Honestly! Gosh.
Dell, do you really think...

Who was it?

It was my...in-between ex, Jack.

Jack? The MTV exec?
Are you fucking serious?

I thought you hated MTV.

-Isn't he short?
-He's not tall.

Are you seriously defending him?
You can't call him short?

You have to go with "not tall"?
Jesus, you like him.

Why the fuck are you being
so sangfroid over this shit?

You're being way too easy
on yourself.

You should know
I'm standing in the middle

of a monsoon right now.

Well, so...
Maybe I should let you go, then?

Why? Because I'm standing
in the middle of a monsoon?

No, because you... Yes!

'Cause you're standing
in the middle of a monsoon.

Um...

Are you OK?
What are you staring at?

Oh! My thesis.

That reminds me. I've been
keeping articles about you.

They said that your drug
led to major breakthroughs

in cancer treatment.

That's amazing, Dell.
Your mom especially must be proud.

- That's me and...
-Jack.

How long you guys
been engaged?

So... What are you
talking about?

Well, you boxed up a lot of
old kitchen appliances over there.

You've either declared a fatwa
on General Electric

or you're wedding-registering
the fuck

out of your friends
and family.

You've been fidgeting
with your ring finger nonstop.

You're also
giving me that look

like you're trying
to think of a lie real quick.

I might beat the shit
out of you.

Wedding's in a few weeks.

Question is, where's the ring?

- Getting sized.
-Huh.

Question number two -
why didn't you tell me?

I was gonna tell you, before you did
your whole annoying MacGyver thing.

Yeah, I don't think that's the reference
you're looking for.

- Does Jack even know I'm here?

- Trust me. He knows you're here.
-What does that mean?

- Why'd you scoff?
-What scoff? I didn't scoff.

You scoffed.

You guys fought
about me coming.

I'm actually kind of flattered.

Didn't know yours truly
could threaten

the evil prince
of the MTV generation.

First of all,
Jack's leaving MTV.

His article in 'Esquire'
was optioned by George Clooney.

Yeah, well, I won my fantasy
baseball league last year.

Let's not talk
about Jack, OK?

I'm happy
to not talk about Jack.

What's the smoking rule
in here?

Is he making a face?
Is that a...?

That's just how he looks.

So, l...l had a very vivid dream
the other night about us.

A vivid dream?

What was it about,
this vivid dream?

It was a dream
of memories,

conversations that we've had.

I saved your life.

You owe the person
that saved you, don't you think?

You had a dream
that was really a series

of memories of conversations
we've had?

Yeah, don't hurt yourself.
It's not that complicated.

Well, 'cause to the brain,
there's no difference

between reality and dreams.

They were just memories of us
over the years.

What if I don't subscribe to
a culture of indentured servitude?

You can't unsubscribe.

It's a thing of nature.
It's here to stay.

But they weaved in and out
of each other

like those...
those M.C. Escher drawings,

so one second,
I'd be on the train

that time
that we got back together,

after our first break-up.

Another second,
I was on the phone in New York...

...the last time
we ever talked to each other.

But they...they blended together
like a...

Painting?

I saved your life.

If it weren't for me, you would
have been run over by that car.

You would have been splat,

just like my
timeless life painting thing.

And they were all real,

but there was one moment
in the dream that was...

Well, it was one we never had.
It was...it was the only one.

What was it about,
this made-up moment?

It's gonna sound weird -
it was...us talking,

after not having talked
for however long.

- Wait. I'm confused. It was...
-This moment. Yeah.

This moment
that we're having right now,

so me coming over,
seeing your apartment,

your life with Jack,
and reconnecting.

Oh, God, I feel sick.
I blame L.A. for this.

This is what happens when
you fall in love in Los Angeles.

Fuck.

So... What is this?

- Are you breaking up with me?
-I don't want to, no.

But...y0u like
this Jack guy, right?

You realise Jack Tripper
was one of my favourite characters

in all of fiction?

You've forever ruined
his good name.

Shit. Can I... Oh, shit.

I can't even order
a Jack and Coke anymore.

A vodka soda. Vodka soda.

- My life is ruined.

We should just get off the phone, OK?
You're mad.

And any words we exchange now
are gonna be bleak at best.

You used to never want
to get off the phone.

I used to want to get off the phone.
I just used to not.

And now you can't wait
to get off the phone.

I don't know even know what
we're fighting about anymore.

If you want to yell about Jack,
fine, but I'm too tired

for another one
of your meta arguments.

There's no way I deserve
to be treated like this.

I thought you were supposed
to be my indentured servant.

- Whatever happened to that, huh?
-So...

What are you talking about
right now?

I'm talking about that
prescription-to-life thing.

Right, except it's
subscription to nature.

- Whatever.
-You've got this backwards, kid.

- I saved your life.
-But then I saved your life.

On the train. We ran into each together.
We got back together.

You mean when you stalked
and followed me onto the train?

You got off at Chico.
You weren't supposed to get off.

You were supposed to go to Portland,
but because of me,

you got off at Chico and weren't
on the train when it derailed.

- You could have died.
-No-one died, Dell.

- The point remains.
-No, that is not the same. OK?

You would absolutely have died
had I not saved you.

Plus, I saw that car coming.
I knew it was gonna hit you.

- And I knowingly saved you.
-Yeah, well...

That's starting to feel
like a minus, not a plus.

Be that as it may,
you didn't know you were saving me.

You were just trying
to get back in my pants.

No! I was trying
to get you back.

Which just happens to include
getting in your pants.

So yours was a sinister doing.
Mine was pure altruism.

But I knowingly saved you too.

We just went over this,
pothead.

You were supposed to get off
at Portland to meet Jack,

but I knowingly
saved you from him.

Except I didn't, did I?

Fuck.

I should have told you I loved you more,
when we were together.

I mean...
I was also such a dick to you.

I just thought you'd find it endearing
for some reason,

like the way people feel about
Don Rickles or Mussolini.

It's not an excuse.
It's just...just a reason.

Anyway, I'm sorry, OK?

I need a drink, in a bad way.

There's a bar car here,
and they sell drinks.

- Let's go.
-Does that mean we have to...

We have to walk
in between the cars while...

I can't do that
while the train's moving.

- Oh, don't be such a pussy.
-Said the dick?

The world's at war right now,

so I think we should
take every little opportunity

to put ourselves in harm's way,

alleviate some of the guilt,
you know?

No, no. There's all the scary
noises that the train makes.

And...what if I fell?

I don't have the best relationship
with gravity.

Put your iPod on.
Play something calming.

That'll drown out the sound.

And I'll hold your hand
so you don't fall.

Come on.

Come on.

I won't let you go. I promise.

You ever tried asking someone,
"Where's my fucking money?"

- Have you ever done that?
-You mean, like, at random?

Or when I'm actually owed money?

- No, at random, obviously.
-Right.

I don't know
what I was thinking.

It's fun.
You should try it. Ask me.

-Hm?

Ask me. Ask me,
"Where's my fucking money?"

- Where's my fucking money?
-Where's MY fucking money?

Oh, no, motherfucker.
Where's my fucking money?

If I don't get my fucking money
right fucking now...

Where is my goddamn money,
you motherfucker?!

Ifyouu.

What the fuck?

Jesus!

That was really fun.

Wait. It's just that...
Well, say what you were gonna say.

And then...after you say it,
maybe we should, like,

not talk for a minute -
you know, let a whole minute pass by

without saying something.

Say what you were gonna say.
We can start right after that.

I'm really gonna
miss you tomorrow.

So, wait - you're saying
you dreamt this conversation,

a conversation that didn't
take place until now?

I'm saying I dreamt
a bunch of conversations,

including this one,
which led me to come here,

because it made me think...
about how much I regretted...

You regret meeting me, Dell?

- No. Of course not.
-I'm glad we dated.

I needed to date you.

Before you, I only dated guys
that looked good on paper.

Yeah.

Wait, what?

You were really, really smart,
but also...selfish, crass.

Not always in
an entertaining way, mind you.

You hated your job
and your life,

and you were completely
comfortable being miserable.

You're horrible on paper.

And I loved you.

And being with you
made me realise

it doesn't have to look good on paper
to feel good.

- What kind of sandwich...?

Of course.

What's your favourite word?

- 'Comet'.
-'Comet'?

Right.

Not, like,
'proliferate', 'ensconce'?

'Kerfuffle'? 'Serendipity'?

'Comet'? Like...

'Comet'.

Yeah. Exactly like that.

What about
your least favourite word?

Oh... I don't strongly dislike
any word, I don't think.

I sort of have
a love-hate relationship

with the word 'finger-fuck',

but that's technically
two words,

and I like each one
separately.

Hm.

So...do you ever wish
you could, like,

control society
for a couple minutes?

Like make them all hate MTV
or something?

I don't think MTV is as important
as you think it is.

You're so wrong.
MTV is so manipulative.

It's like a drug
that you get hooked on at age 12

that you can't wake up from
until you're probably, like, 30,

when you finally realise
how awful it really was.

But by then, it's too late.
It's, like, won.

You've watched
all their commercials

during their week sweep.

I believe it's sweeps week.
Sweeps week.

You don't deserve me.
I can tell.

That's perfect.
I want someone I don't deserve.

You think you've won me.

I can't believe you think
you've won me already.

Are you...are you kidding?

You ditched a much prettier man
to stay with me.

I've definitely won you.

You are so wrong, my friend.

Holy shit.

You are so easily amused.

Because of the boots, huh?

Sarah's stupid idea.

Louis L'Amour is her favourite novelist,
so here we are.

You know, I just realised.
I don't even know why we're here.

I don't even like Sarah. Fire?

Just let me have this
and then we'll go.

What are you doing?

This feels like a dream.

I love it
when you look out windows.

Sir.

Did you damage the bathroom
about 30 minutes ago?

Well, I'm obviously
gonna tell you that I didn't.

- Sir?
-What?

I'm gonna have to ask you
to get off at the next stop.

Don't let me find you on here
after Chico.

- OK. Sorry.
-You got me?

Yes, sir. Thank you. Sorry.

I don't even want to ask.

Looks like our little tryst
is about to end.

Get off at Chico with me.
Please.

We can have
an hour- to two-hour talk.

If you want, get you
another ticket to Portland.

An hour- to two-hour talk?
That's a long time, Dell.

Well, I'm not meeting anyone,
so...

Wait, what?

There's no...girl.

So, what...what was this?

Just another one of
your stupid mind games, Dell?

Why did you lie?
And what happened to your hand?

You're always hiding things.
I'm sitting somewhere else.

Listen. Wait. No, no.
Stop, stop, stop, stop. I'm sorry.

I lied because I thought
it'd make it easier, OK?

- Thought it'd make it easier?
-Yeah.

You thought it'd make
what easier exactly?

- Talking to you.
-Why would it make it easier?

Because I don't think
you'd talk to me

if you knew I was trying
to get you back.

So, what was this?
Is this a plan to win me back?

Yeah, it was. It was a whim
that turned into a plan.

How did you even know
I was on this train?

Because I f...l...l stalked you.

You could have called, Dell.

You haven't talked to me
in a long time.

- I know.
-You have my phone number.

You have my email.
But you haven't contacted me once.

- Not once in months.
-Just... Look.

I know a great public library
in Chico where we can talk.

We can talk about
all of this.

You want to go to
a public library to talk?

- That seems counterintuitive.
-They have a talking area.

You happen to know
of a public library in Chico

with a talking area?

Yeah.

First, answer my question.
How come you never proposed?

Come on, Kimberly.
You broke up with me.

How come
you didn't fight for me?

It felt like the end of days
when you left.

I ate ramen for months.
I had a huge sodium imbalance.

Barely got through it.
Didn't think I could do it again.

Felt like my...fucking world
was gonna blow up.

So me leaving you constitutes
your world blowing up?

- Yes. It does, actually.
- Next stop, Chico.

Listen. Come on.

I want you to do this.

Why wouldn't you
want this forever?

I'd like for once
to understand

why you wouldn't
want this always.

'Cause 'always' is scary.
There's a finality to it.

Just don't ever want you
to feel like a limitation.

OK. Let me go
a different way with it.

Why are girls so scared
of cockroaches, huh?

It's 'cause you think
they'll hurt you,

even though they can't,

just like I'm afraid 'always'
will hurt me.

- They're both irrational.
-False on so many fronts.

Well, why?

Girls are afraid of cockroaches

because they're gross
and they carry disease,

proven by the fact that they're
one of the biblical plagues.

Also, they love to lay eggs
in your vagina.

Secondly,
it's not irrational to think

that commitment can hurt you,
'cause it can.

Know that when you
steal a girl's 20s,

it's dangerous business,
buster.

You're officially on notice,
Mr Pink Lighter.

Duly noted, Mrs Pink Lighter.

No. You can't call me that.

You don't want to marry me,
remember?

I didn't say that.

Where's my phone?

Where's my phone?
Where's my fucking phone?

Hey, w-w-why don't I call it?

Why are you acting like that?

- Like what?
-Uncomfortable.

In the two years
we've known each other,

I have rarely seen you
uncomfortable.

I'm...I'm not.

You are.

You're hiding something
from me.

Oh, God. You just got
too stoned, Kimberly.

And I thought we were going
after your last cigarette.

- What are you doing?
-What are you hiding?

- You know something.
-There's no something.

You just got too high.

You best motherfucking believe
there's a something.

There is
always a something, OK?

This is not the first time
I have felt that.

- Felt what?
-You.

Saying something
like you've slipped.

I didn't slip.

Like a cartoon character
on a banana peel.

You know what?
You're actually starting to freak me out.

- There's nothing going on.
-it's about time you're freaked.

OK, I hate always feeling like the freak
in this relationship.

Why are you doing this?

Because there's something
you're not telling me.

OK, I know you, and I know
when you get uncomfortable.

And it's so rare
that I have formed

an acute discomfort detector
on you.

Are you gonna tell me
what it is,

or are you gonna force me to be late
to my own annoying friend's

Louis L'Amour
goddamn Western-themed wedding?

Kimberly, let's not do this.
This is paranoia.

Hey.

Kim.

Look at me.

Keep looking.

You're right. You're right.

There's something
I've been wanting to tell you.

In the dream, I told you
I wanted to be with you,

you to leave Jack
and walk out the door with me.

-Wow.

Do you feel that?

What?

OK. Calm down.

Maybe you just need some air.
Let's go up to the rooftop.

So, what else happens
in this dream? Do I...

Do I go with you,
all happily ever after and the like?

Or do I slap you
and tell you, "Begone"?

I don't know, actually.
We were looking at each other.

And I went to kiss you,

and before our lips touched,
I woke up.

-What?

Maybe I never saved you
that night we met.

Maybe you did die
hit by that car

and this...is just
some afterlife fantasy

playing out in your head.

- What?
-Something feels weird.

Remember how you
used to love flipping the pillow over

to feel the cool side?

Yeah.

That's what our relationship
felt like.

Constant tossing and turning,

looking for
that perfect balance.

Sometimes it was there.
And other times...

I know. I know.

You always expected us to break up.
Why was that?

Is that 'cause of your dumb
five-minutes-from-now rule?

After we stopped talking,

the five-minute rule
started shrinking.

Went...went to four minutes,
then three...

...then two, then one.

Let's go up to the rooftop.

Come on!

I thought my unconscious
was trying to tell me something -

you know, by dreaming that dream
a few nights ago,

coming here
and talking to you,

I might close the gap
that...that last minute.

Or...

Or none of this
is really happening.

This could still be your dream.

Dun-dun-dun!

- Oh, crap!
-What? What happened?

Fucking bird carcass
on my windshield.

What? OK. Slow down.
Tell me what's going on.

I'm saying a fucking bird
just committed suicide

on my windshield.

What? In the middle
of our conversation?

What does our conversation
have to do with anything?

It must mean something.
It must mean that...that...that...

Maybe the bird was commenting
on our situation.

Commenting?

- You think this is commentary?
-Definitely! I mean...

Something - the universe,
cosmos, all that, via the bird -

sent us a signal, yeah.

OK.

I want you to listen to me
very, very carefully, OK?

OK. You're gonna be mean,
aren't you?

On this already horrible call,

you're gonna be mean
on top of it.

You are very, very, very...

You know what,
I can't even say 'very' enough.

So just imagine an
infinite number of 'very's. OK?

Well, I don't have
that kind of imagination.

I can barely picture
odd-numbered things.

Well, freaking try, OK?

'Cause that number of 'very's
precedes sick, sick.

Told you you were gonna be mean,
and condescending,

as if I didn't already know
how to spell 'sick'.

You are not being
a nice person right now!

So...I'm at the gun range.

This is a nightmare.

Sartre was right.

- Hell is other people.
- I should go.

I've got my goggles on.

You did this on purpose,
didn't you?

You wanted me to find out
when I was 3,000 miles away.

You were telegraphing
all the signs

like you were
Samuel-fucking-Morse.

You wanted me to know.

That's the part
that hurts the most.

Why would I want that?

'Cause maybe your feelings for him
are real.

How long
has it been going on?

- About a month.
-A month?! Oh, shit.

I'm so sorry for interrupting
the honeymoon period.

Hear those are the best parts
of a relationship.

I'm gonna go, OK?
I've got my goggles on.

Yes, I fucking heard you!

Enough with the goggles already!
Jesus Christ!

How are you gonna
get off the phone

and just go about your day
after this, huh?

'Cause I don't think
all of our conversations

need to necessarily
feel good!

They should feel bad, then?

They should be whatever
the conversation should...

I don't know! Why are you
analysing this so much?

Oh, I'm not analysing it yet.

I'm just giving you
my initial gut reaction.

Can I please get off the phone with you
and not feel like shit?

You hurt me!

You really hurt me this time,
Kimberly.

I want to break up with you.

I don't love you.

No. That's not
what you want to say.

That is what I want to say,
actually.

I don't...
I don't love you, Kimberly.

Honestly, I don't know
if I ever really did.

You definitely didn't.

If you're capable
of making choices

that knowingly hurts the other person,
that's not love.

OK. You're mad.
You're mad. You...

How can you say that?

Reality is I could have met
any number of girls

to be with
for a few years.

That was your lie. Alright?

Texting Jack behind my back.
It came when I least expected it.

And I fell for it
hook, line and sinker.

And it fucking hurts.
That was your lie.

- Bravo.
-OK! Fine.

You want to hurt me?
You want to be right? Fine.

Go ahead. Be right.

All I ever wanted
was the truth.

No. No.
You want to be right.

Truth is not what you're after,
because if you wanted the truth,

then you would have to accept
the fact that I do...

Who is this?

I'm sorry.
Is this Dell?

- Who's this?
-Yes. Hi. This is Nancy.

I'm your mother's nurse.

- We met a few times.
-Yeah.

I'm really sorry
to have to tell you this.

Your mother passed away.

What? It's impossible.
She's been OK for years now.

Her cancer's been in remission.

She had a heart attack.

Heart attack?

Why?

Sometimes these things
just happen.

This feels strange.

Not what I expected my train ride
to feel like at all.

What were you expecting?

I was expecting to read
that short story.

The...the Roald Dahl one?
You...you already read it.

You know the ending.

Sometimes it's not about
knowing the ending.

It can't be the same
like it was last time.

It has to be different or we'll
wind up right where we started.

I know. I know.

I promise you I'll change.

I promise, OK?

You know I'm falling out of love
with you, right?

Just shut up for a second,
please.

What do you want to
tell me, Dell?

Kimberly...

I used to find it
really annoying

that you said 'so'
all the time.

Bugged the shit out of me.

And l...l love it.

I love it now.

After we have sex
and you shrug your shoulders

and you say,
"I'm here all week,"

love that.

I love that
a single strand of your hair

can fall so perfectly
to the side

and you don't even know.

I love the little blue veins
behind your eyes.

-I love your eyes.

Knowing you goes down
as easily the best thing

that's ever happened to me.

Easily.

If I were a restaurant,
you'd be my special,

but nobody could order you,

'cause I'd just want you
to be mine,

just all mine.

Not in, like,
a biblical slavery-owning sense

or a pimp-prostitute dynamic of
"You be mine, bitch,"

but...but just in that...
you're my love.

- You're my love.

But my favourite thing of all...

...I like you
'cause you like me.

I don't know -
I think that says a lot

about how great you are
as a person.

So, um...

Dell.

Believe me.

Believe me when I say...

...you almost had me.

Isn't it weird to imagine
that one day,

this'll all be old to us?

This walk, us meeting.

Just be an old memory.

This sounds...

...sad.

Hey. I gotta...l gotta ask you
a really big question.

I don't know if you can handle it
since it...it's really big.

What?

- Forget it. It's stupid.
-What?

Forget it. Stupid joke.
You can probably even figure it by now.

- Why would I know the joke?
-Because I've already said it.

- When?
-Earlier in the conversation.

When? Hey. Come on.
I'm so confused.

Sometimes I want to
stop people in the streets.

- Who?
-Anybody, all walks of life.

On the way to work,
to the gym, to school.

- Grab them, like you right now.
-Right now?

Right now -
look right into their eyes

and I want to ask them
one simple question.

"Where's my fucking money?"

I think I'm gonna
fall in love with you too.

- Are you crying?
-Shut up.

There's still my theory,

that this is just...
part of that strange dream.

And so...even if we do kiss,

you'll just wake up
and it'll all be over.

- This can't be a dream.
-What if it is?

What are you doing?

Something's wrong.

I know it, Kimberly.
I know you.

You have circles
under your eyes.

You were the type of girl
that could sleep through wars.

In spite that, you're still
looking so beautiful -

more beautiful than ever,
in fact.

It's usually a sign

you want to remind the world
that you're a sexual being,

'cause your man's
not picking up the signal.

You've checked out of this relationship,
haven't you?

You're not happy.

Also, you're listening
to Roxette,

and I know that means
the beginning of the end.

And let's get real for a second
about the ring, alright?

You're not having it sized.

I'm sure you had your ring size

burned into Jack's memory years ago.

Fuck, I still remember it.
4.5.

You don't wear the ring
'cause you didn't want me to see it.

Don't marry him, OK?
I want you back.

And I know you want me back too.
That's why I'm here.

That's what you've been wanting
to say to me this whole time.

- Dell?
-What?

I'm pregnant.

What?

The morning sickness
has been keeping me up.

I just really love Roxette.

And I dress this way not to announce
to the world anything.

It was you.
I wanted to look good for you.

'Cause no matter
how bad our relationship got,

I wanted to say thank you from
the bottom of my heart for it.

Because I needed it.

I needed you in this life.

That's what I wanted to say.

I gotta...l gotta sit down.

I'm sorry.

I'm not leaving Jack.

I love him.

Wow. You're pregnant.

I didn't see that coming.

Do you know what it is yet?

Not yet.

Hoping it's a girl.

Uh...l almost proposed to you,
you know.

When we were
in that hotel room in Paris.

I even picked out the ring.
I had it with me.

I was about to
give it to you.

I took it, and...

I flushed it down the toilet.

I keep replaying that moment

over and over again
in my head.

'U..

Why are you crying?

I'm just happy to see you.

And it's such a beautiful night.

I feel like
I'm in the wrong world.

'Cause I don't...
I don't belong in a world

where we don't end up together,
I don't.

There are parallel universes out there
where this didn't happen.

Where I was with you
and you were with me.

And whatever universe that is,

that's the one
that my heart lives in.

I wanted so badly
to go back into that dream

I had the other night.

L...tried so hard
to go back to sleep.

You know, I never thought
love was real. I didn't.

And now I think life isn't real
without it.

And that sounds like
a really bad greeting card.

Don't.

Don't make it a joke.

Truth?

I think you always
believed in love.

This is so stupid.

So irrational.

Why am I so hell-bent
on getting you back?

You fucking hate Pixar movies,
for crying out loud.

You still have an AOL account.

I don't want to be with
a person like that.

Why does it feel so impossible
to let you go?

It's an addiction, you know?
That's all it is.

It's a biochemical addiction.
It's so stupid.

If you think about it,

relationships
are all totally narcissistic,

'cause basically,
you're just looking for someone

who will love you as much
as you love yourself.

- That's all it is.
-No, it's not!

- Yes, it is.
-No, it's not.

No, it's not.

I don't know anything anymore.

But I know I do love you.

- Dell?
-Just...give me a minute, OK?