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1
00:01:15,420 --> 00:01:17,590
Welcome back to Celebrity Dance Factor.
2
00:01:18,170 --> 00:01:20,470
l'm Hutch Davidson
and we are live from Hollywood
3
00:01:20,510 --> 00:01:23,090
just moments away from crowning
our season champion.
4
00:01:23,470 --> 00:01:26,680
Now, we've just seen the last dances
from our first two finalists.
5
00:01:26,890 --> 00:01:28,970
Reality television star, Whitney Port.
6
00:01:33,940 --> 00:01:36,820
And Miami Heat basketball star,
Dwyane Wade.
7
00:01:43,160 --> 00:01:47,280
Which brings us to our last, but certainly
not least, finalist of the night.
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00:01:47,490 --> 00:01:51,120
Everyone's favorite tough love trainer from
the weight-loss show, Lose it and Weep.
9
00:01:51,330 --> 00:01:52,660
Oh, my God, l think l'm gonna throw up.
10
00:01:52,710 --> 00:01:55,250
-We got this. We got this, okay?
-You're right. We can do this.
11
00:01:55,340 --> 00:01:57,500
-Just one more dance. One more dance.
-We know how to do this.
12
00:01:57,630 --> 00:02:00,630
Jules Baxter
and her partner, Evan Webber!
13
00:02:50,890 --> 00:02:52,810
Alex, quick, come see this!
14
00:02:54,140 --> 00:02:55,270
What are you watching?
15
00:02:55,350 --> 00:02:56,730
Celebrity Dance Factor.
16
00:02:56,810 --> 00:02:58,560
-No.
-lt's the finals!
17
00:02:58,610 --> 00:03:00,270
Even l need a cold shower after that one.
18
00:03:00,360 --> 00:03:03,820
Let's turn to our esteemed panel ofjudges.
Tyce? Let's hear your score.
19
00:03:04,240 --> 00:03:05,570
Five stars!
20
00:03:09,660 --> 00:03:11,240
Okay. Cheryl Cole?
21
00:03:11,540 --> 00:03:13,910
You know what, if l had six stars,
l'd give you the six.
22
00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:16,120
But l've only got five,
so you can have those.
23
00:03:17,580 --> 00:03:20,290
-Jules is taking it.
-No. l think D-Wade has it.
24
00:03:20,380 --> 00:03:21,670
-What?
-Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
25
00:03:21,750 --> 00:03:24,590
And Taboo of The Black Eyed Peas,
let's have your thoughts.
26
00:03:24,630 --> 00:03:27,130
lt wasn't for me, so l gave you a three.
27
00:03:27,640 --> 00:03:29,890
-Dude. She's totally doing him.
-No way.
28
00:03:29,930 --> 00:03:32,010
Don't question the sage insights
of Star Buzz.
29
00:03:32,100 --> 00:03:34,390
We've tallied the judges' scores
and added them to our viewers' votes.
30
00:03:34,600 --> 00:03:39,100
And let me tell you, this is
the closest result we have ever recorded.
31
00:03:39,270 --> 00:03:41,270
May l have the envelope, please?
32
00:03:42,070 --> 00:03:43,110
Thank you.
33
00:03:45,530 --> 00:03:50,950
And the winner of Celebrity Dance Factor,
Season 1 5 is...
34
00:03:59,630 --> 00:04:00,830
l can't...
35
00:04:02,960 --> 00:04:05,260
Jules Baxter and Evan Webber!
36
00:04:35,660 --> 00:04:37,160
Jules? Are you okay?
37
00:04:37,210 --> 00:04:38,290
l'm sorry. So sorry.
38
00:04:38,670 --> 00:04:41,330
Let's hope she's not pregnant, folks.
39
00:04:44,960 --> 00:04:46,000
Fireworks!
40
00:04:57,890 --> 00:05:00,940
Book signing. Milk lt! the book!
41
00:05:01,020 --> 00:05:03,230
Pictures of breasts inside!
42
00:05:03,650 --> 00:05:06,070
Welcome, everyone, to The Breast Choice.
43
00:05:06,150 --> 00:05:10,030
l'm Wendy Cooper, wearing two hats today
as store owner
44
00:05:10,200 --> 00:05:14,200
and author of my very first
children's book Milk lt!
45
00:05:15,370 --> 00:05:16,870
Yay!
46
00:05:17,200 --> 00:05:19,370
So let's get started.
47
00:05:20,500 --> 00:05:21,870
Hi.
48
00:05:23,210 --> 00:05:25,340
"Goats do it.
49
00:05:25,960 --> 00:05:27,800
"Cows do it.
50
00:05:28,050 --> 00:05:29,800
"Kitties do it.
51
00:05:30,300 --> 00:05:33,050
"Even dolphins in the sea do it.
52
00:05:33,800 --> 00:05:38,060
"When your mommy uses her breasts
to feed a baby
53
00:05:38,220 --> 00:05:40,850
"she is feeding her baby the..."
54
00:05:40,890 --> 00:05:42,190
Tits!
55
00:05:42,230 --> 00:05:43,440
Gary!
56
00:05:44,310 --> 00:05:46,150
Okay, okay. Sorry. l got it. l got it.
57
00:05:46,690 --> 00:05:48,940
-Hey, kid!
-All right!
58
00:05:49,030 --> 00:05:51,740
-They're called breasts.
-Thank you all for coming.
59
00:05:51,900 --> 00:05:55,490
lt was just lovely. And hug your mommies
for breast-feeding you.
60
00:05:55,580 --> 00:05:58,160
-Thank you.
-Bye. Thank you. See you.
61
00:05:58,240 --> 00:06:00,830
-Hey! Great job, hon!
-Did you get that kid?
62
00:06:00,910 --> 00:06:02,120
No. He was too fast.
63
00:06:02,330 --> 00:06:05,210
But l said some choice words.
They were very choice.
64
00:06:05,250 --> 00:06:07,040
Punk. Next time, get him.
65
00:06:07,090 --> 00:06:10,380
Okay. l will. But what's important right now?
66
00:06:11,840 --> 00:06:13,090
That l just had my first reading.
67
00:06:13,130 --> 00:06:16,140
Yeah! Yeah, you did! You did great.
68
00:06:16,260 --> 00:06:18,560
-l gotta get back, okay?
-What? No! Gar!
69
00:06:18,600 --> 00:06:21,100
-Lil Wayne is waiting.
-Can't some other dentist do it?
70
00:06:21,180 --> 00:06:23,270
Squeaks, it's my first grill!
71
00:06:23,900 --> 00:06:25,270
-Right? Yeah.
-All right.
72
00:06:25,360 --> 00:06:27,110
-lt's a big deal.
-l was gonna take you to lunch, but okay.
73
00:06:27,150 --> 00:06:29,730
Next time, all right?
Congratulations! Great job!
74
00:06:33,110 --> 00:06:34,740
-Gar!
-Yeah?
75
00:06:40,040 --> 00:06:41,080
Two minutes.
76
00:06:41,250 --> 00:06:42,450
-l gotta go.
-Honey!
77
00:06:42,540 --> 00:06:43,830
-Honey, l got to go, l got...
-Honey!
78
00:06:47,920 --> 00:06:48,920
-Janice!
-Yeah.
79
00:06:48,960 --> 00:06:50,380
l'm taking Gary in the back.
80
00:06:55,220 --> 00:06:58,140
Look, we can do this the easy way
or we can do this the hard way.
81
00:06:58,220 --> 00:07:01,890
And l get it, you're naked, you're vulnerable
but this is a safe place, you know.
82
00:07:01,970 --> 00:07:04,640
No need to resort to cheap theatrics.
83
00:07:05,310 --> 00:07:08,730
We're better than that, right? We're artists.
84
00:07:08,820 --> 00:07:10,940
So, let's just keep it dignified.
85
00:07:14,860 --> 00:07:16,320
Look, kid.
86
00:07:16,360 --> 00:07:20,530
lf you don't smile, your mom doesn't buy
any prints and l don't get paid.
87
00:07:20,740 --> 00:07:21,990
So, suck it up.
88
00:07:23,000 --> 00:07:25,790
All right, baby. You like it when l'm bossy?
89
00:07:26,540 --> 00:07:28,880
Okay! Okay.
90
00:07:29,340 --> 00:07:33,880
Work the feet. Show me those gums!
That's it, baby!
91
00:07:37,140 --> 00:07:39,680
Holly, these are amazing.
92
00:07:39,760 --> 00:07:42,890
Well, l can give you 20% off
on prints if you order today.
93
00:07:44,980 --> 00:07:47,850
-Oh, my God! l am so sorry.
-Okay!
94
00:07:48,650 --> 00:07:51,570
That's okay. lt happens.
95
00:07:51,650 --> 00:07:53,690
You know the last guy
who threw up on me?
96
00:07:53,780 --> 00:07:55,860
You know what l did? l married him.
97
00:07:56,360 --> 00:07:58,990
You're so good with kids.
You should have one of your own.
98
00:07:59,030 --> 00:08:00,700
Yeah. That's kind of the plan.
99
00:08:00,740 --> 00:08:03,200
Well, don't wait too long.
You don't wanna miss your window.
100
00:08:03,240 --> 00:08:04,370
Right.
101
00:08:04,410 --> 00:08:07,870
Yeah! Let's get you cleaned up. Yeah.
102
00:08:09,080 --> 00:08:10,750
What do you got?
103
00:08:10,840 --> 00:08:12,880
Some wine, cheese and crackers,
your favorites.
104
00:08:12,960 --> 00:08:14,500
That's a real treat.
105
00:08:15,340 --> 00:08:16,970
So what's the movie anyway?
106
00:08:17,050 --> 00:08:18,760
Dirty Dancing.
107
00:08:18,840 --> 00:08:21,550
All right! That's a good one. Yeah.
108
00:08:24,270 --> 00:08:25,520
What are you...
109
00:08:26,020 --> 00:08:28,020
l would like to propose a toast.
110
00:08:28,060 --> 00:08:31,100
Okay. But you haven't had a drink
in two years.
111
00:08:31,440 --> 00:08:32,980
l just...
112
00:08:33,070 --> 00:08:35,230
l think we should take a break from trying.
113
00:08:35,280 --> 00:08:36,570
And just be us for a while.
114
00:08:37,240 --> 00:08:39,610
All right. l'll drink to that. Sure.
115
00:08:40,530 --> 00:08:41,740
To us.
116
00:08:41,780 --> 00:08:45,410
And if that doesn't work
we'll do three rounds of lVF.
117
00:08:47,250 --> 00:08:49,000
And if that doesn't work,
118
00:08:49,080 --> 00:08:50,370
we'll just adopt, which will be great,
119
00:08:50,420 --> 00:08:53,340
because l have no fears,
genetic or otherwise.
120
00:08:55,550 --> 00:08:56,670
To us.
121
00:08:56,920 --> 00:08:58,760
To not snuffing out the flame.
122
00:08:58,840 --> 00:09:00,010
-Okay.
-Okay.
123
00:09:03,470 --> 00:09:06,260
What are you doing? Oh, my God!
Are you gonna go for it?
124
00:09:06,560 --> 00:09:08,730
You're going for it. You did it.
125
00:09:08,890 --> 00:09:12,190
You just... You crushed it.
You crushed a glass of wine.
126
00:09:12,440 --> 00:09:13,770
Oh, my God, l'm wasted.
127
00:09:14,270 --> 00:09:15,610
Yeah, l bet you are!
128
00:09:15,820 --> 00:09:19,570
lt's so good. Why have l wasted two years
not drinking this?
129
00:09:20,030 --> 00:09:22,160
Oh, my God! The Big Pig is here.
130
00:09:22,280 --> 00:09:24,120
-l didn't even get a tweet!
-All right, people.
131
00:09:24,160 --> 00:09:26,620
lt's swine time, let's go!
What do you want, bud?
132
00:09:26,660 --> 00:09:30,080
Yeah, give me two carnitas tacos
and a jalapeno fritter.
133
00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:32,120
Good man. You have your cardiologist
on speed dial, right?
134
00:09:32,290 --> 00:09:33,880
Right? You do, right? Hey, girls.
135
00:09:34,290 --> 00:09:36,750
How are you?
Best meal on wheels right here.
136
00:09:36,840 --> 00:09:40,260
Tell that to my cheese and bacon panini.
Total foodgasm.
137
00:09:40,590 --> 00:09:42,050
Bacon?
138
00:09:43,510 --> 00:09:44,840
Have a good night.
139
00:09:47,350 --> 00:09:48,390
Bacon.
140
00:09:48,560 --> 00:09:51,730
You know what? l'm also gonna get
the Georgia Dog Special.
141
00:09:51,980 --> 00:09:53,900
-Yo, chef. Where're you going?
-Two seconds.
142
00:09:53,980 --> 00:09:55,770
l added to my order.
Do you think he heard it?
143
00:09:55,820 --> 00:09:58,020
l can't do anything with gloves on.
144
00:09:58,820 --> 00:09:59,820
What can l get you guys?
145
00:10:01,320 --> 00:10:02,360
All right, excellent choice.
146
00:10:02,490 --> 00:10:04,490
Hey! What do you think you're doing?
147
00:10:05,160 --> 00:10:06,490
There's a line if you want to order.
148
00:10:06,580 --> 00:10:10,410
The only thing l'm ordering is for you
to stop serving bacon, okay? Pig's our turf.
149
00:10:12,040 --> 00:10:14,330
Oh, my God! Your turf?
150
00:10:14,790 --> 00:10:16,000
-Yeah.
-ls this West Side Story?
151
00:10:16,090 --> 00:10:17,090
Are we gonna rumble at midnight?
152
00:10:17,170 --> 00:10:19,710
You know what, maybe l got
a whole gang of back-up dancers
153
00:10:19,800 --> 00:10:21,380
-just ready to go, okay?
-Wow!
154
00:10:21,510 --> 00:10:23,510
You're the cheese truck, so stick to cheese.
155
00:10:23,550 --> 00:10:25,640
-Can l order now?
-No! Just give me one second, please.
156
00:10:25,850 --> 00:10:29,060
That's funny, 'cause l noticed that those
jalapeno fritters you guys are serving...
157
00:10:29,140 --> 00:10:32,230
Are awesome, right? They're my invention.
l made them.
158
00:10:32,310 --> 00:10:33,850
They have ricotta cheese in them.
159
00:10:33,940 --> 00:10:35,810
Come on! That's like a little bit of cheese.
160
00:10:35,860 --> 00:10:37,520
That's nothing compared
to the bacon crutch
161
00:10:37,610 --> 00:10:39,150
you're propping these sandwiches up on.
162
00:10:39,190 --> 00:10:41,780
They're paninis, they're grilled peach
and blue cheese paninis,
163
00:10:41,860 --> 00:10:43,320
with a dash of bacon.
164
00:10:43,360 --> 00:10:45,110
Also awesome. Also my invention.
165
00:10:47,410 --> 00:10:50,240
All right, you wanna go? Let's go.
Your special against my special.
166
00:10:50,330 --> 00:10:51,910
Whoever sells the most tonight, wins.
167
00:10:52,200 --> 00:10:53,580
-Fine.
-Fine.
168
00:10:53,660 --> 00:10:55,710
All right, if l win,
you have to have a drink with me.
169
00:10:56,210 --> 00:10:57,710
And if you win, you may have
170
00:10:58,340 --> 00:11:00,000
-three drinks with me.
-That's cute.
171
00:11:00,050 --> 00:11:02,550
So you can stand me up again?
No thank you.
172
00:11:02,630 --> 00:11:05,840
That was five years ago.
But that's sweet you still remember that.
173
00:11:05,890 --> 00:11:08,260
l'm impressed, Rosie.
174
00:11:08,390 --> 00:11:09,430
l'll see you in the field, all right?
175
00:11:09,510 --> 00:11:11,390
-lt doesn't keep me up nights.
-Sure.
176
00:11:11,470 --> 00:11:12,850
Who's that?
177
00:11:13,480 --> 00:11:15,850
This guy from high school. Total player.
178
00:11:16,400 --> 00:11:18,400
l'd play with that.
179
00:11:18,480 --> 00:11:20,360
Don't be gross. Don't be that girl.
180
00:11:24,320 --> 00:11:26,150
You're not still hungry, are you?
181
00:11:26,240 --> 00:11:29,280
l don't know. lt depends on what you got left
in your picnic basket.
182
00:11:29,370 --> 00:11:32,580
Dr. Cooper. We're in a public place.
183
00:11:32,620 --> 00:11:35,330
l know. lt's all so unscheduled.
184
00:12:05,280 --> 00:12:06,440
l win.
185
00:12:07,280 --> 00:12:09,570
What did you think was gonna happen?
186
00:12:09,620 --> 00:12:13,790
Well, l asked you to prom first, all right.
And then you said, "Maybe"
187
00:12:13,830 --> 00:12:15,250
-so l decided to ask someone else.
-No, l didn't...
188
00:12:15,290 --> 00:12:18,080
Yes, you did. So l asked someone else.
Then you said, "Yes."
189
00:12:18,620 --> 00:12:22,250
So l tried to take you both.
What's so wrong with that?
190
00:12:22,800 --> 00:12:24,880
-l'm not saying it worked.
-Fine.
191
00:12:25,170 --> 00:12:27,220
l blocked out most of high school anyway.
192
00:12:27,300 --> 00:12:29,130
Hey. Where'd you get this guy?
193
00:12:30,300 --> 00:12:31,800
l fought a grill and the grill won.
194
00:12:31,890 --> 00:12:33,350
Why'd you fight the grill?
lt always wins.
195
00:12:33,430 --> 00:12:35,680
-"Chef hands." Occupational hazard.
-Yeah, guys love it, though.
196
00:12:35,850 --> 00:12:37,640
-Do they?
-Guys love burned hands.
197
00:12:37,730 --> 00:12:39,020
Yeah? Check this out. Okay.
198
00:12:39,100 --> 00:12:41,480
First time breaking down a pig
when l was 1 6.
199
00:12:41,610 --> 00:12:43,520
-Five stitches. Five. Yeah.
-Five?
200
00:12:43,610 --> 00:12:45,570
-That is adorable!
-l wasn't asking your opinion, that's okay.
201
00:12:45,650 --> 00:12:47,400
-That is adorable!
-All right, l wasn't asking your opinion.
202
00:12:47,490 --> 00:12:50,160
Look. A deli slicer
nearly took my whole thumb off.
203
00:12:50,240 --> 00:12:52,950
All right. Second-degree burn.
Making caramels.
204
00:12:53,200 --> 00:12:55,580
-Your own fault.
-Yeah, l know.
205
00:12:55,660 --> 00:12:57,250
Home-made is the best, though.
206
00:12:57,330 --> 00:12:59,660
-So good for you for trying.
-Never again. Never again.
207
00:12:59,750 --> 00:13:02,380
-Julienning shallots.
-Julienning shallots?
208
00:13:02,460 --> 00:13:04,960
'Cause Julianne, ex-girlfriend, right there,
she got me.
209
00:13:05,000 --> 00:13:07,210
-Julianne. l see what you did there.
-l know.
210
00:13:07,300 --> 00:13:09,380
-That's good.
-Yeah? lt was good, right? l saved it for you.
211
00:13:09,470 --> 00:13:11,380
Whoever she was, you probably deserved it.
212
00:13:11,680 --> 00:13:14,180
What? You are so mean.
Are you always this mean?
213
00:13:14,260 --> 00:13:16,680
-Always.
-ls that your gift?
214
00:13:17,180 --> 00:13:18,390
Always?
215
00:13:22,690 --> 00:13:24,310
Okay.
216
00:13:24,860 --> 00:13:27,360
Okay, Trouble. l'm gonna go.
217
00:13:27,690 --> 00:13:29,490
-You're gonna go?
-l'm gonna go.
218
00:13:29,700 --> 00:13:32,610
-lt's been super real.
-Where do you think you're going?
219
00:13:32,700 --> 00:13:36,530
-lt's been great catching up with you...
-Yes!
220
00:13:36,830 --> 00:13:38,290
Formal handshake. Good to see you.
221
00:13:38,370 --> 00:13:40,040
Maybe l'll see you on the truck line
222
00:13:40,080 --> 00:13:41,160
-again sometime, right?
-Yeah.
223
00:13:41,370 --> 00:13:42,620
Yeah, Rosie Brennan.
224
00:13:42,710 --> 00:13:44,830
-Your hands are on my waist.
-They are on your waist, aren't they?
225
00:13:44,880 --> 00:13:47,130
How did they find themselves there?
l don't know.
226
00:13:47,670 --> 00:13:49,590
This is really awkward, isn't it?
227
00:13:49,670 --> 00:13:51,630
Well, if you don't stop me,
l'm just gonna kiss you.
228
00:13:51,720 --> 00:13:53,640
ls that gonna be okay?
229
00:14:09,570 --> 00:14:11,950
This is me getting in my car.
230
00:14:12,030 --> 00:14:13,400
This is you waving goodbye.
231
00:14:21,210 --> 00:14:22,910
My zipper's stuck.
232
00:14:23,500 --> 00:14:25,420
ls that our alarm?
233
00:14:25,460 --> 00:14:26,540
What?
234
00:14:26,590 --> 00:14:29,210
-Yeah. Definitely.
-No, l think our car's that way.
235
00:14:29,260 --> 00:14:30,670
No, it's this way.
236
00:14:47,610 --> 00:14:49,110
Water feels so good.
237
00:14:49,190 --> 00:14:50,530
Good, baby.
238
00:14:50,610 --> 00:14:51,780
Do you want some tea?
239
00:14:51,940 --> 00:14:53,240
No.
240
00:14:53,740 --> 00:14:55,410
Are you sure you're not freaking out?
241
00:14:55,450 --> 00:14:59,280
Seriously, l mean, just say so.
l can handle it.
242
00:15:00,080 --> 00:15:01,910
Freak out's a little strong.
243
00:15:01,950 --> 00:15:04,250
l really thought l had a bum fallopian tube.
244
00:15:04,500 --> 00:15:06,420
-l just don't wanna force it.
-Hey, Crazy.
245
00:15:08,170 --> 00:15:10,040
l wanted to be with you
before you were pregnant.
246
00:15:10,130 --> 00:15:12,380
This just speeds things up a little.
247
00:15:12,630 --> 00:15:14,670
-A lot.
-So?
248
00:15:15,510 --> 00:15:17,550
We're old enough. We love each other.
249
00:15:18,350 --> 00:15:20,640
What's to figure out?
250
00:15:20,680 --> 00:15:23,390
Apart from what are you gonna do
about your show?
251
00:15:23,480 --> 00:15:25,810
Well, we start filming in three weeks
252
00:15:25,850 --> 00:15:28,440
and l'll be finished before l have to deliver.
253
00:15:29,320 --> 00:15:33,900
So, basically, l am going to be
helping people get thin while l get fat.
254
00:15:34,400 --> 00:15:35,700
What are you doing?
255
00:15:36,860 --> 00:15:38,360
Yeah!
256
00:15:40,870 --> 00:15:44,040
-Shit! My tattoo!
-So what?
257
00:15:44,500 --> 00:15:47,920
You're not gonna be the only mom out there
with that Spring Break dolphin. Trust me.
258
00:15:48,000 --> 00:15:50,540
But those other moms
aren't getting judged like me.
259
00:15:50,840 --> 00:15:53,500
Good call, Holly.
"l'll never get tired of a dolphin."
260
00:15:54,510 --> 00:15:57,050
l'm not tired of it. l smile every time l see it.
261
00:15:57,130 --> 00:15:59,050
Oh, God! Stop!
262
00:16:03,770 --> 00:16:04,850
Let's do it.
263
00:16:04,890 --> 00:16:06,270
-Let's see.
-Okay.
264
00:16:07,690 --> 00:16:09,150
No, no, no!
265
00:16:09,190 --> 00:16:10,230
What? No!
266
00:16:10,560 --> 00:16:12,980
-Even our wedding photo?
-l'm not taking any chances.
267
00:16:13,230 --> 00:16:14,280
Okay?
268
00:16:15,320 --> 00:16:16,900
Be normal.
269
00:16:20,280 --> 00:16:23,240
And you're planning on
bringing the baby home here?
270
00:16:23,370 --> 00:16:24,490
-Yeah, we're...
-No.
271
00:16:24,540 --> 00:16:27,120
No, this is just a rental.
272
00:16:27,210 --> 00:16:29,460
We're buying a house, a really nice house.
273
00:16:29,540 --> 00:16:33,800
A big yard, one story,
no pool or sharp edges of any kind.
274
00:16:33,880 --> 00:16:36,630
Yeah, we're moving into a padded cell.
275
00:16:36,720 --> 00:16:39,260
And why did you choose Ethiopia?
276
00:16:40,260 --> 00:16:43,510
Honestly, we would have been happy
adopting from anywhere.
277
00:16:43,560 --> 00:16:47,140
We were on a waiting list for Guatemala,
but then they closed their adoptions.
278
00:16:47,230 --> 00:16:50,480
So we started researching Ethiopia
and we just...
279
00:16:50,730 --> 00:16:52,270
We just really fell in love with the culture.
280
00:16:54,150 --> 00:16:55,980
Plus, all the white babies were taken.
281
00:16:57,610 --> 00:16:59,070
You're a comedian?
282
00:17:00,070 --> 00:17:01,570
-No. He's not.
-No.
283
00:17:02,320 --> 00:17:04,450
-He's not even funny. At all.
-Yeah.
284
00:17:05,080 --> 00:17:09,120
What he does is, he actually picks songs
for commercials for an ad agency.
285
00:17:09,370 --> 00:17:11,420
-Great health insurance.
-Yeah.
286
00:17:11,500 --> 00:17:14,920
They're working on a big ad
for Delta Air Lines...
287
00:17:14,960 --> 00:17:17,460
Well, we're bidding on it.
lt's not a done deal yet.
288
00:17:17,880 --> 00:17:19,920
And how's the photography business?
289
00:17:20,010 --> 00:17:22,590
Well, l'm still waiting for the Guggenheim
to start collecting my work.
290
00:17:22,640 --> 00:17:25,390
But until then, l'm shooting at
the Aquarium.
291
00:17:25,430 --> 00:17:27,520
And, you know, it pays the bills.
292
00:17:29,520 --> 00:17:31,480
"All the white babies were taken"?
293
00:17:31,560 --> 00:17:33,020
What?
294
00:17:34,190 --> 00:17:35,270
Cookie?
295
00:17:35,320 --> 00:17:36,360
No, thank you.
296
00:17:37,530 --> 00:17:39,610
So you think we're looking at a year?
297
00:17:39,650 --> 00:17:43,110
Well, every case has its own timeline.
You just have to be patient.
298
00:17:43,570 --> 00:17:46,660
But on average, yes, a year. Maybe more.
299
00:17:46,990 --> 00:17:48,290
More?
300
00:17:49,330 --> 00:17:52,960
l could work with that, right?
Yeah, that sounds good.
301
00:17:53,290 --> 00:17:55,540
So does that mean you like us?
302
00:17:56,800 --> 00:17:58,340
l don't see any red flags.
303
00:17:58,510 --> 00:18:01,720
But you need to baby-proof
if you're going to stay here.
304
00:18:01,970 --> 00:18:03,340
Yeah. Of course.
305
00:18:03,760 --> 00:18:04,890
Do you have a wedding photo?
306
00:18:04,970 --> 00:18:07,260
The Ethiopian authorities really like to
see that in the packet.
307
00:18:07,310 --> 00:18:09,180
-No.
-Yeah, we do.
308
00:18:09,270 --> 00:18:11,480
-Of course we do. Yeah, we do.
-No, we don't. We lost it.
309
00:18:11,520 --> 00:18:14,650
-Yeah. We do. Where is it?
-No! No! No!
310
00:18:15,900 --> 00:18:18,820
l think it's right here.
311
00:18:20,900 --> 00:18:23,110
Vegas. lt was a costume wedding.
312
00:18:23,570 --> 00:18:25,570
l was Prince, Holly was a showgirl.
313
00:18:27,080 --> 00:18:28,620
He loves Purple Rain.
314
00:18:29,750 --> 00:18:32,040
You know what, why don't we just say
it got burned in a fire?
315
00:18:32,330 --> 00:18:33,620
Good one.
316
00:18:33,670 --> 00:18:35,170
-Here.
-Thank you.
317
00:18:36,210 --> 00:18:39,500
Wendy, can l go
on my 1 5-minute Facebook break?
318
00:18:40,840 --> 00:18:43,880
Wendy?
319
00:18:44,470 --> 00:18:46,010
Are you dead?
320
00:18:46,600 --> 00:18:47,850
Hey.
321
00:18:48,930 --> 00:18:52,430
Man, l was dreaming
that l had a kangaroo pouch.
322
00:18:52,890 --> 00:18:54,310
That sounds awesome.
323
00:18:54,770 --> 00:18:57,810
lt was like a purse.
l could hide my snacks in it.
324
00:18:57,940 --> 00:19:00,270
You're like a human-kanga hybrid.
325
00:19:02,780 --> 00:19:04,820
l like to rub my breasts, too.
326
00:19:12,160 --> 00:19:14,750
Gary! Gar Bear!
327
00:19:14,870 --> 00:19:18,500
Gar! Gary! Gar Bear! Gar!
328
00:19:21,340 --> 00:19:22,840
-Wendy!
-We're pregnant!
329
00:19:23,090 --> 00:19:25,050
l'm with child! We're pregnant!
330
00:19:25,090 --> 00:19:26,800
-Oh, my God!
-We did it!
331
00:19:28,390 --> 00:19:32,390
My balls work! My balls work! Oh, my God!
332
00:19:32,720 --> 00:19:34,680
Keep it in your lane, people.
333
00:19:34,730 --> 00:19:36,560
l did it! l did it!
334
00:19:37,060 --> 00:19:39,520
-We did it! We're gonna have a baby!
-We made a baby!
335
00:19:44,530 --> 00:19:45,990
Shit!
336
00:19:46,070 --> 00:19:48,820
Rosie, hurry up!
l need my lucky bra for my interview.
337
00:19:49,200 --> 00:19:50,490
Ro!
338
00:19:51,870 --> 00:19:54,200
Two seconds, that's all l wanted.
339
00:19:54,790 --> 00:19:57,420
What's her deal?
l thought she finally got laid.
340
00:19:57,460 --> 00:19:58,500
l don't know.
341
00:19:59,130 --> 00:20:01,250
l love these hardwood floors!
342
00:20:02,170 --> 00:20:05,010
This is it, baby. lt's so perfect.
This is the one.
343
00:20:05,380 --> 00:20:08,590
Are you insane?
We're not buying, we're just looking.
344
00:20:09,050 --> 00:20:11,220
You want the house or the baby?
345
00:20:11,260 --> 00:20:12,680
l want the house for the baby.
346
00:20:12,760 --> 00:20:14,970
We can't afford it.
347
00:20:15,100 --> 00:20:17,190
-Hi.
-Hi.
348
00:20:17,520 --> 00:20:18,850
Hi.
349
00:20:20,060 --> 00:20:22,650
Look, this is it.
This is the one we have to get.
350
00:20:22,770 --> 00:20:24,900
We're just looking.
351
00:20:26,700 --> 00:20:28,650
-Stop worrying.
-Okay, okay.
352
00:20:28,740 --> 00:20:31,950
lt's just, he gives me a hard time
when l'm late, you know.
353
00:20:33,370 --> 00:20:34,990
Don't let him get into your head.
354
00:20:35,080 --> 00:20:38,410
Yeah. Okay. You're right.
He can't ruin this. Not today.
355
00:20:38,460 --> 00:20:39,870
No.
356
00:20:43,090 --> 00:20:44,630
So, Dad.
357
00:20:44,880 --> 00:20:47,510
Wendy and l have
a little announcement to make.
358
00:20:48,300 --> 00:20:49,800
-We're pregnant!
-We're pregnant!
359
00:20:52,550 --> 00:20:53,680
Oh, my God!
360
00:20:54,180 --> 00:20:55,260
lsn't that great?
361
00:20:57,810 --> 00:20:59,100
-So are we!
-What?
362
00:20:59,140 --> 00:21:00,650
You're... What, are you... Are you kidding?
363
00:21:00,810 --> 00:21:04,360
Yeah, hell's bells.
l guess it's congratulations to all of us.
364
00:21:05,070 --> 00:21:08,440
Holy... l had no idea
that you guys were even trying.
365
00:21:08,740 --> 00:21:10,030
-We weren't!
-No.
366
00:21:10,110 --> 00:21:13,240
Now, look, son,
there's no blanks in this pistol.
367
00:21:13,330 --> 00:21:14,700
Boom!
368
00:21:16,540 --> 00:21:18,620
You guys, you've been trying
for quite a while.
369
00:21:18,660 --> 00:21:20,500
What two, three months?
Something like that?
370
00:21:20,790 --> 00:21:22,330
Two years.
371
00:21:23,840 --> 00:21:25,210
Not everything's a race, Dad.
372
00:21:25,460 --> 00:21:26,500
-Gar.
-No.
373
00:21:26,550 --> 00:21:28,050
-Yeah. Right?
-No. Not everything.
374
00:21:28,380 --> 00:21:30,470
Only things where you can come in first.
375
00:21:30,840 --> 00:21:32,640
-Okay.
-Come on.
376
00:21:32,680 --> 00:21:35,550
Gary, let's celebrate.
Let's go to Margaritaville.
377
00:21:35,640 --> 00:21:37,560
-l don't wanna go to Margaritaville.
-Come on.
378
00:21:37,640 --> 00:21:39,060
l don't wanna go to Margaritaville.
379
00:21:39,390 --> 00:21:41,770
Everybody wants to go to Margaritaville.
380
00:21:43,480 --> 00:21:45,520
-l don't wanna go.
-Come on!
381
00:21:45,570 --> 00:21:48,190
l'm gonna break out
the Don Julio "Blank-o."
382
00:21:48,400 --> 00:21:51,860
"Blanco," Dad. "Blanco."
That's how you pronounce it.
383
00:21:51,990 --> 00:21:54,490
And it's 1 1 :00 a.m., kind of early for shots.
384
00:21:54,870 --> 00:21:57,370
-lt's 5:00 somewhere.
-True.
385
00:21:57,620 --> 00:21:59,750
-Don't be a pussy.
-You know what?
386
00:21:59,960 --> 00:22:02,210
Margaritaville is abierto for business.
387
00:22:02,290 --> 00:22:05,880
Wendy, l just have to say, l am just
so happy to have a baby expert in the family.
388
00:22:06,500 --> 00:22:08,210
Are you feeling anything yet?
389
00:22:08,300 --> 00:22:09,340
Joy.
390
00:22:09,380 --> 00:22:11,050
-Yeah.
-Some exhaustion.
391
00:22:11,300 --> 00:22:14,550
A little nausea. Some heartburn.
And my boobs are killing me.
392
00:22:15,600 --> 00:22:16,930
Plus, l have to pee every five minutes.
393
00:22:17,010 --> 00:22:21,680
But it's just proof
that a miracle is happening inside of me.
394
00:22:21,730 --> 00:22:23,350
So l'm so happy.
395
00:22:24,020 --> 00:22:25,900
lt is a miracle, isn't it?
396
00:22:25,980 --> 00:22:28,730
l mean, l thought l'd have to
give up my Pilates, and my running
397
00:22:29,190 --> 00:22:33,320
-and tennis and my strip-aerobics.
-Sure.
398
00:22:33,410 --> 00:22:35,950
And kickboxing, just all my activities.
399
00:22:36,030 --> 00:22:38,280
But it just turns out
l have all this extra energy.
400
00:22:38,580 --> 00:22:40,580
-You know? You know?
-Oh, yeah.
401
00:22:40,620 --> 00:22:42,080
Plus,
402
00:22:42,160 --> 00:22:45,000
l'm like crazy-horny.
403
00:22:45,330 --> 00:22:47,500
-Okay. Okay.
-l mean,
404
00:22:47,630 --> 00:22:51,880
if l even get a whiff of Ramsey,
it's like l just have to pounce, you know?
405
00:22:51,920 --> 00:22:53,550
And l gotta give this old boy credit.
406
00:22:53,590 --> 00:22:57,890
He's still got that race car engine
that can go the distance.
407
00:22:58,600 --> 00:23:01,100
-Hormones. What're you gonna do?
-Yeah. Yeah.
408
00:23:01,180 --> 00:23:03,140
l don't know.
Maybe not talk about it at brunch?
409
00:23:03,230 --> 00:23:05,350
-Yep, that's what l'd do.
-That's what l'd do, too.
410
00:23:05,440 --> 00:23:07,100
We're on the same page on that one.
411
00:23:07,150 --> 00:23:09,020
Honey, l know you can't have any
412
00:23:09,110 --> 00:23:12,030
-so l'm gonna do one for you and the baby.
-The baby!
413
00:23:12,280 --> 00:23:13,440
Sweet.
414
00:23:14,320 --> 00:23:17,820
-Here's to the Coopers.
-Yeah, you know what, what the hell.
415
00:23:17,910 --> 00:23:19,530
Yeah.
416
00:23:20,580 --> 00:23:22,290
Well, that was delicious.
417
00:23:22,370 --> 00:23:25,120
Honey, l didn't make any of it.
You know Ramsey don't want me cooking.
418
00:23:25,250 --> 00:23:26,830
-Your mom and l...
-Not my mom.
419
00:23:26,920 --> 00:23:28,670
We sure wish y'all could stay longer.
420
00:23:29,210 --> 00:23:31,460
Yeah. That's the thing. lt's such a bummer,
421
00:23:31,550 --> 00:23:34,260
but the missus
and little Mini Cooper and l,
422
00:23:34,300 --> 00:23:35,510
we have an appointment.
423
00:23:35,590 --> 00:23:37,340
-Yes, at...
-Walmart.
424
00:23:37,430 --> 00:23:38,890
-For paint.
-Yeah. And mulch.
425
00:23:38,970 --> 00:23:43,020
Well, you know what they say.
Money isn't everything,
426
00:23:43,100 --> 00:23:45,310
but sure keeps you connected to your kids.
427
00:23:45,770 --> 00:23:47,140
-So how much you need?
-Dad, l don't need any money.
428
00:23:47,190 --> 00:23:48,650
-l don't need any money.
-Come on. How much you need?
429
00:23:48,730 --> 00:23:50,820
No, l don't need anything at all.
Thank you so much.
430
00:23:50,940 --> 00:23:53,070
-Man pats.
-Man pats, that's great.
431
00:23:53,150 --> 00:23:54,610
Come here, baby, give your mama a kiss.
432
00:23:54,650 --> 00:23:55,820
-What?
-Okay...
433
00:23:55,900 --> 00:23:57,490
-Baby.
-Okay.
434
00:23:57,570 --> 00:24:00,160
My baby boy. l'm so proud of you.
You've grown up so fast.
435
00:24:00,240 --> 00:24:02,240
Okay, Gary. Gar.
436
00:24:02,330 --> 00:24:03,700
-What? Yeah.
-Okay.
437
00:24:04,830 --> 00:24:06,960
-Awesome. This was so much...
-All right. We'll see y'all later.
438
00:24:07,000 --> 00:24:09,000
Yeah, great, this was a thing, you know?
439
00:24:09,040 --> 00:24:10,920
-Congratulations!
-Yeah, congrats.
440
00:24:11,000 --> 00:24:13,670
-Come back soon!
-Don't ever kiss her again.
441
00:24:15,630 --> 00:24:16,840
Well...
442
00:24:18,090 --> 00:24:20,720
Okay. Are you sure you took the test right?
443
00:24:21,970 --> 00:24:24,180
You pee on a stick. lt's idiot-proof.
444
00:24:24,220 --> 00:24:27,520
No, l know. lt's just, you know, one time.
445
00:24:27,600 --> 00:24:28,640
Yeah.
446
00:24:33,230 --> 00:24:35,480
So what do you want to do?
447
00:24:36,360 --> 00:24:37,820
l don't know.
448
00:24:38,450 --> 00:24:39,910
What do you want to do?
449
00:24:40,280 --> 00:24:42,780
Look, l don't know.
450
00:24:42,870 --> 00:24:47,080
l just found out, okay? You're the girl.
Don't you get to decide?
451
00:24:47,160 --> 00:24:49,040
Great, great. So then it's all on me?
452
00:24:49,120 --> 00:24:51,130
No. No, l didn't mean...
453
00:24:53,090 --> 00:24:55,840
Shit. Should we get married?
454
00:24:56,470 --> 00:24:59,550
"Shit. Should we get married?" Yeah.
455
00:25:00,340 --> 00:25:02,600
No, it's just,
when you put it like that, that's...
456
00:25:02,680 --> 00:25:04,810
l'm sorry, Rosie.
l'm just trying to do the right thing here.
457
00:25:04,890 --> 00:25:07,680
-l didn't mean to...
-Then don't ask the wrong questions.
458
00:25:08,690 --> 00:25:11,810
-Just forget that l said anything.
-No.
459
00:25:11,900 --> 00:25:15,230
Just forget it 'cause l'll figure it out.
Whatever it is, it's not your problem.
460
00:25:15,360 --> 00:25:16,570
-Rosie!
-lt's fine.
461
00:25:16,610 --> 00:25:18,150
l have to get back to the truck anyway.
462
00:25:28,790 --> 00:25:30,710
There he is!
463
00:25:31,420 --> 00:25:33,540
Perfect. Okay, guys, look right here.
464
00:25:34,090 --> 00:25:35,590
Big smile.
465
00:25:36,210 --> 00:25:38,920
Aristotle! Good smile!
466
00:25:39,720 --> 00:25:43,090
Okay, beautiful. You can pick up your prints
at the kiosk at the front.
467
00:25:43,300 --> 00:25:45,930
All right, everyone.
Aristotle needs his down time.
468
00:25:46,140 --> 00:25:47,890
Okay, can we all wave bye-bye?
469
00:25:48,270 --> 00:25:49,640
Bye!
470
00:25:49,980 --> 00:25:51,440
Thank you, nice friend.
471
00:25:51,600 --> 00:25:53,480
So, how's Alex? ls he excited?
472
00:25:53,560 --> 00:25:55,440
Yeah! Yeah! He's...
473
00:25:55,480 --> 00:25:59,110
No. Actually, he's... l don't know.
474
00:25:59,190 --> 00:26:01,450
l don't know. Maybe he's just not ready.
475
00:26:01,490 --> 00:26:03,490
-They're never ready.
-Yeah.
476
00:26:03,570 --> 00:26:05,620
Dude's group.
477
00:26:05,700 --> 00:26:07,030
-What?
-Dude's group.
478
00:26:07,120 --> 00:26:08,660
lt's like Fight Club,
479
00:26:08,750 --> 00:26:11,080
only there's no fighting,
everybody has babies,
480
00:26:11,120 --> 00:26:13,170
they don't talk about what they do there.
481
00:26:13,250 --> 00:26:15,250
l don't know what they do there
and l don't need to know.
482
00:26:15,290 --> 00:26:18,250
All l know is that Craig started going
when l was pregnant with Henri
483
00:26:18,300 --> 00:26:20,380
-and he's losing his shit.
-Yeah.
484
00:26:20,470 --> 00:26:24,130
Now, he loves being a dad
and he never misses a Saturday.
485
00:26:24,220 --> 00:26:27,140
You want Alex ready?
Send him to the dudes.
486
00:26:28,310 --> 00:26:30,810
Your blood pressure is low
and you are in good health.
487
00:26:30,890 --> 00:26:33,770
-And Dad's gonna keep you that way, right?
-Right.
488
00:26:33,810 --> 00:26:35,730
-Look at these pamphlets.
-Thank you.
489
00:26:35,810 --> 00:26:37,900
That's all we need to know.
Let's not go crazy with the research.
490
00:26:37,980 --> 00:26:40,150
l love research. lt soothes me.
491
00:26:40,190 --> 00:26:43,450
Well then, you'll love the wall.
l'll see you both in a month.
492
00:26:43,530 --> 00:26:45,200
Wow!
493
00:26:45,280 --> 00:26:47,120
-Look at the wall!
-No, no, no, no.
494
00:26:47,160 --> 00:26:49,370
l don't want to know about
everything that can go wrong.
495
00:26:49,450 --> 00:26:50,870
Oh, my God! Look at this.
496
00:26:50,950 --> 00:26:52,710
Okay, there's breast-feeding,
we have to know about this.
497
00:26:53,000 --> 00:26:55,080
Cord-blood-banking,
this is very important these days.
498
00:26:55,170 --> 00:26:58,340
You need to learn the Bradley Method.
And... What?
499
00:26:58,920 --> 00:27:00,630
"Circumcision: Yes or No?"
500
00:27:00,670 --> 00:27:02,840
Of course. How is that even a question?
501
00:27:02,920 --> 00:27:05,970
Actually, a lot of couples are choosing
not to circumcise these days.
502
00:27:06,430 --> 00:27:07,970
-lnteresting.
-Who said that?
503
00:27:08,010 --> 00:27:10,470
The expert, honey.
So clearly, there's a question.
504
00:27:10,520 --> 00:27:13,930
-That's why it says "Yes or No?"
-My answer is "Yes." Yes! Yes!
505
00:27:14,020 --> 00:27:16,190
-My answer is, "l need to read about it."
-No more...
506
00:27:16,440 --> 00:27:18,190
See you tomorrow, okay?
507
00:27:26,530 --> 00:27:28,700
l'm not gonna forget it.
508
00:27:31,370 --> 00:27:33,660
Can l get a "l can do it"? You can do it!
509
00:27:34,210 --> 00:27:37,420
-I can do it!
-Who are you doing it for?
510
00:27:37,500 --> 00:27:39,340
Oh, my God.
Damn, this show gives me the munchies.
511
00:27:39,380 --> 00:27:40,670
This is the beginning of the rest of your life!
512
00:27:40,710 --> 00:27:42,420
l so wanna do that slide-y thing.
513
00:27:42,510 --> 00:27:44,260
l feel so bad, but it's hilarious.
514
00:27:44,340 --> 00:27:47,720
-No, no, this is just so funny.
-l hope they're having fun.
515
00:27:51,220 --> 00:27:52,350
-Hi.
-Hi.
516
00:27:52,390 --> 00:27:54,140
Marco, this is Courtney and Molly.
517
00:27:54,390 --> 00:27:56,980
-Hey. Nice to meet you.
-And vice-versa.
518
00:27:57,060 --> 00:28:00,690
l thought you said "Cute Marco."
Not "Hot Marco."
519
00:28:00,900 --> 00:28:02,780
Well done, Rosie.
520
00:28:02,860 --> 00:28:04,530
-Well done.
-You said l was cute?
521
00:28:04,570 --> 00:28:06,030
-lgnore them.
-Yeah, we did.
522
00:28:06,660 --> 00:28:08,030
So, you're going, right?
523
00:28:08,070 --> 00:28:09,950
No, l'm not. l've already got friends.
524
00:28:10,080 --> 00:28:12,910
-But these guys all have babies.
-Yeah. That sounds terrible.
525
00:28:13,790 --> 00:28:16,410
Craig goes. You like Craig.
526
00:28:16,460 --> 00:28:19,380
l tolerate Craig at a barbecue.
Not as a forced play date.
527
00:28:22,590 --> 00:28:26,880
-lf you go, just once...
-Holly, l am trying to work here, okay?
528
00:28:27,680 --> 00:28:30,760
-Oh, my God!
-l'll give you one right here, right now.
529
00:28:31,640 --> 00:28:33,100
Really?
530
00:28:33,140 --> 00:28:34,850
-Right here, right now?
-Yes.
531
00:29:55,560 --> 00:29:56,680
Hey, Craig.
532
00:29:56,770 --> 00:29:59,060
Alex, Vic. Vic, Alex.
533
00:29:59,850 --> 00:30:01,100
Welcome to Happy Hour.
534
00:30:01,690 --> 00:30:02,770
Let's walk.
535
00:30:07,400 --> 00:30:09,690
l sense your fear, Alex. lt's cool.
536
00:30:10,070 --> 00:30:11,240
You're still on the other side.
537
00:30:11,530 --> 00:30:13,200
Stay on that side, Alex.
538
00:30:13,280 --> 00:30:14,990
This is the side
where happiness goes to die.
539
00:30:15,030 --> 00:30:16,620
Don't mind Craig. He's had a bad week.
540
00:30:17,200 --> 00:30:20,950
Kara just took a three-day business trip
and little Henry there just got sick.
541
00:30:21,410 --> 00:30:23,960
-Here you go, big boy. Walk it off.
-Thanks.
542
00:30:24,040 --> 00:30:27,750
By the way, when we're around Kara,
it's still "Henri." "Henry's" on the DL.
543
00:30:28,380 --> 00:30:30,050
-Henri.
-You got that, Alex?
544
00:30:30,130 --> 00:30:32,130
lt's very important. That's the first rule.
545
00:30:32,260 --> 00:30:34,590
-Don't talk about what we walk about.
-Rule #1 .
546
00:30:34,680 --> 00:30:35,760
Got it.
547
00:30:35,850 --> 00:30:39,060
See, Alex, women pretty much control
the baby universe. And why not?
548
00:30:39,100 --> 00:30:42,310
They carried the damn things,
pushed them outta their vaginas.
549
00:30:42,390 --> 00:30:45,150
l never used to use that word
for that part of the body but, trust me,
550
00:30:45,230 --> 00:30:47,610
once a baby comes out of it, it's a vagina.
551
00:30:47,770 --> 00:30:48,980
-Yeah!
-lt changes.
552
00:30:49,070 --> 00:30:51,990
Here, we're free.
No one's looking over your shoulder.
553
00:30:52,070 --> 00:30:54,740
lf you put the diaper on backwards
or forget to heat the bottle up,
554
00:30:54,910 --> 00:30:56,320
you go with it.
555
00:30:56,410 --> 00:30:59,030
lf you wanna ditch those carrot sticks
and feed your kid McNuggets
556
00:30:59,080 --> 00:31:00,370
-you go for it.
-Who cares?
557
00:31:00,450 --> 00:31:02,580
And if your wife named your kid "Henri"
558
00:31:02,620 --> 00:31:04,710
and you wanna ignore
that silent-H bullshit...
559
00:31:04,750 --> 00:31:07,330
-Bullshit!
-...you're in a safe place. What's up, Henry!
560
00:31:07,420 --> 00:31:08,710
-Good to know.
-Henri. What is he, a mime?
561
00:31:09,090 --> 00:31:11,920
Where does "Henri" come from anyway?
562
00:31:12,010 --> 00:31:14,260
-Cirque du Soleil.
-So dumb.
563
00:31:14,630 --> 00:31:16,970
lt looks like
you've got your hands full there.
564
00:31:17,050 --> 00:31:19,260
Yeah, l got four under five.
565
00:31:19,720 --> 00:31:23,600
One more, we can run a full court.
Two more and l got pallbearers.
566
00:31:23,850 --> 00:31:28,270
l got Evander here. Venus and Jeter
are my twins, and my main man Jordan.
567
00:31:28,650 --> 00:31:33,190
Sure, twice a year, l think about the price
of college and cry in my car for a half hour.
568
00:31:33,280 --> 00:31:36,070
But then l punch myself in the dick
and get over it.
569
00:31:36,110 --> 00:31:38,700
-l can go for four more.
-Really?
570
00:31:38,780 --> 00:31:39,990
Come on, Jordan. Keep up.
571
00:31:40,450 --> 00:31:42,830
Craig, do you have some sunscreen?
572
00:31:42,910 --> 00:31:45,750
Relax. Sunburn is full of vitamin D.
573
00:31:45,830 --> 00:31:48,460
-Guys! lt's Davis!
-Totally!
574
00:31:48,670 --> 00:31:50,670
-D-Bone!
-Hey, big guy!
575
00:31:50,800 --> 00:31:51,960
Fellas.
576
00:31:52,010 --> 00:31:53,170
What's up, bro?
577
00:31:53,970 --> 00:31:56,550
Offspring. New guy.
578
00:31:56,630 --> 00:31:57,630
What's up, man?
579
00:31:57,720 --> 00:31:59,300
-Everybody good?
-Yeah, man.
580
00:31:59,350 --> 00:32:02,180
So, D-Biscuit, haven't seen you
hanging around. Where you been?
581
00:32:02,270 --> 00:32:05,140
-Costa Rica, bro.
-Central America, classic.
582
00:32:05,180 --> 00:32:06,230
l had to do some work.
583
00:32:06,310 --> 00:32:07,390
-Really?
-Working it.
584
00:32:07,480 --> 00:32:10,360
-"Work!"
-This lucky bastard's a surf photographer,
585
00:32:10,440 --> 00:32:12,230
-travels all over.
-Sweet.
586
00:32:13,150 --> 00:32:14,480
What?
587
00:32:16,530 --> 00:32:18,490
Costa Rica.
588
00:32:21,830 --> 00:32:24,330
The mountains of Costa Rica.
589
00:32:24,410 --> 00:32:26,000
Whoa! Whoa!
590
00:32:26,210 --> 00:32:27,370
That's classified.
591
00:32:27,460 --> 00:32:29,830
Gotta watch it, Davis.
That one looks like a wife.
592
00:32:29,880 --> 00:32:30,960
She got "wife eyes."
593
00:32:31,340 --> 00:32:33,670
"Girlfriend tits," but definitely "wife eyes."
594
00:32:33,760 --> 00:32:35,960
l've got to get better pictures on my phone.
595
00:32:36,010 --> 00:32:37,380
Your phone ain't the problem, bro.
596
00:32:37,470 --> 00:32:40,010
Come on. You guys are the ones
living the real dream.
597
00:32:40,090 --> 00:32:42,100
l will Freaky Fridaywith you anytime.
598
00:32:42,350 --> 00:32:45,140
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So, Patel, what's the Camaro situation?
599
00:32:45,220 --> 00:32:47,600
-You ready to sell that bad boy or what?
-Never.
600
00:32:47,690 --> 00:32:48,810
-Never?
-Yeah.
601
00:32:48,850 --> 00:32:50,690
Ask him when was the last time he drove it.
602
00:32:50,730 --> 00:32:52,190
Plus, you can't even get
a car seat in that thing.
603
00:32:52,400 --> 00:32:55,190
Patel's wife wants him to trade in
his '69 Camaro.
604
00:32:55,530 --> 00:32:57,610
We have bets on how long he can last.
605
00:32:57,700 --> 00:33:01,200
Gabriel, l understand you've embraced
the minivan, and that's yourjourney,
606
00:33:01,240 --> 00:33:04,870
but l don't want to drive a vagina on wheels.
607
00:33:05,580 --> 00:33:08,000
My vagina seats seven, comfortably.
608
00:33:08,040 --> 00:33:09,460
l've been in it a million times.
609
00:33:09,540 --> 00:33:12,210
Plus, Patel test drove a minivan
last week anyway.
610
00:33:12,340 --> 00:33:13,750
-What?
-So?
611
00:33:14,050 --> 00:33:15,210
That doesn't mean anything!
612
00:33:15,250 --> 00:33:17,590
l look at houses with Holly,
but we're not buying one.
613
00:33:19,510 --> 00:33:21,550
-Bro, bro, bro.
-What?
614
00:33:21,590 --> 00:33:24,220
When your wife says
you're just test driving minivans,
615
00:33:24,310 --> 00:33:25,560
you're buying a minivan.
616
00:33:25,680 --> 00:33:27,720
And when she says
you're just looking at houses,
617
00:33:27,770 --> 00:33:29,350
-you're buying a house.
-No, l'm not.
618
00:33:29,390 --> 00:33:30,980
-Oh, yes, you are.
-l'm not buying a house.
619
00:33:31,060 --> 00:33:32,230
Check your receipts.
620
00:33:32,310 --> 00:33:34,060
Welcome to escrow, bitch.
621
00:33:34,480 --> 00:33:37,400
No, thank you. Have the Breast Day!
622
00:33:38,570 --> 00:33:40,400
Janice! Janice!
623
00:33:40,490 --> 00:33:42,490
-You're not gonna believe this.
-What?
624
00:33:42,570 --> 00:33:45,240
You are looking at
one of the keynote speakers
625
00:33:45,280 --> 00:33:47,740
at the next regional ABC Kids Expo.
626
00:33:47,830 --> 00:33:50,710
-Shut up! No!
-Yes!
627
00:33:50,830 --> 00:33:52,500
You're living your wisdom!
628
00:33:52,580 --> 00:33:53,670
l know!
629
00:33:53,750 --> 00:33:55,920
-She's speaking at the Expo!
-l'm speaking at the Expo!
630
00:33:56,250 --> 00:34:01,010
At the Expo, about the breast pump
And the lactation
631
00:34:08,680 --> 00:34:10,230
Sorry, l just... Sorry.
632
00:34:10,520 --> 00:34:12,690
No more cell phones.
Landlines only from here on out.
633
00:34:12,770 --> 00:34:16,980
l am protecting my miracle.
634
00:34:17,110 --> 00:34:19,740
Actually, that was my cell phone.
635
00:34:30,620 --> 00:34:33,960
Hey, guys. l'm sorry.
Can l just borrow Alex for two secs?
636
00:34:34,040 --> 00:34:35,330
-What?
-This is it!
637
00:34:35,420 --> 00:34:36,670
-Already?
-Yes!
638
00:34:36,750 --> 00:34:38,300
lt's supposed to be a year. Or more!
639
00:34:38,550 --> 00:34:41,470
You got lucky. l'm sending his pictures now.
640
00:34:41,510 --> 00:34:43,880
His name is Kaleb, he's six weeks old.
641
00:34:44,640 --> 00:34:48,220
We don't have any family medical history
and probably never will
642
00:34:48,310 --> 00:34:51,390
so you two will need to consider
whether that'll be an issue for you.
643
00:34:51,480 --> 00:34:52,980
-Well...
-lt's not!
644
00:34:56,480 --> 00:34:58,150
-Okay. lt's not.
-lt's not.
645
00:34:58,230 --> 00:35:00,480
Great, l'll leave you to it.
646
00:35:05,160 --> 00:35:09,530
Oh, my God! Alex, look at him!
He's gorgeous!
647
00:35:09,870 --> 00:35:11,500
Can you feel it?
648
00:35:12,910 --> 00:35:15,120
We're gonna be a family.
649
00:35:15,170 --> 00:35:17,790
Oh, yeah. Real soon.
650
00:35:19,460 --> 00:35:21,840
-Here, let's take a picture by the sign.
-All right.
651
00:35:23,010 --> 00:35:25,760
Okay, make sure you get the sign
and the house.
652
00:35:25,840 --> 00:35:27,140
And us.
653
00:35:33,520 --> 00:35:34,890
lt's a boy.
654
00:35:34,980 --> 00:35:37,350
-Wow!
-Honey!
655
00:35:37,940 --> 00:35:40,070
l just peed myself a little.
656
00:35:44,700 --> 00:35:45,860
A girl.
657
00:35:45,910 --> 00:35:48,030
-Yes!
-A mini-me!
658
00:35:51,660 --> 00:35:54,410
-We want it to be a surprise.
-lt's okay. We don't have to say.
659
00:35:54,500 --> 00:35:57,580
Evan, l'm pregnant. That's surprise enough.
We wanna know.
660
00:35:57,670 --> 00:35:58,830
lt's a boy.
661
00:35:58,880 --> 00:36:02,630
A boy! That's so cute! l love boys!
662
00:36:02,800 --> 00:36:05,380
lt looks like it's a little early to tell.
663
00:36:07,470 --> 00:36:08,930
That's okay.
664
00:36:11,310 --> 00:36:12,760
She looks good.
665
00:36:14,020 --> 00:36:16,060
-lt's a boy, Dad.
-Well...
666
00:36:16,310 --> 00:36:19,230
He kinda looks like
the Loch Ness Monster to me,
667
00:36:19,270 --> 00:36:20,940
but l'll take your word for it.
668
00:36:21,570 --> 00:36:22,690
He's beautiful, y'all.
669
00:36:23,230 --> 00:36:24,820
-Thank you.
-Now l will see your baby,
670
00:36:26,450 --> 00:36:28,910
and raise you one more.
671
00:36:33,240 --> 00:36:34,580
Twins!
672
00:36:34,910 --> 00:36:36,250
Twins.
673
00:36:36,370 --> 00:36:38,670
-Oh, my goodness! So great!
-God.
674
00:36:38,920 --> 00:36:40,920
Can you believe it? Two!
675
00:36:40,960 --> 00:36:42,380
Two número unos.
676
00:36:42,590 --> 00:36:45,300
-And you got the 4-D ultrasound video.
-Yeah.
677
00:36:45,380 --> 00:36:48,220
Don't you kinda wish you'd done it now?
l offered to pay for it.
678
00:36:49,050 --> 00:36:50,180
So, who wants dessert?
679
00:36:50,260 --> 00:36:52,760
l do! Park it here.
680
00:36:53,260 --> 00:36:55,850
-l don't know if you take it right off...
-What? Maybe you don't.
681
00:36:55,930 --> 00:36:58,270
-Take it easy.
-Wow!
682
00:36:59,100 --> 00:37:02,060
Two! Two número unos!
683
00:37:02,110 --> 00:37:03,980
Holy shit!
684
00:37:05,360 --> 00:37:07,190
-What?
-Whoa, whoa, stop, stop, stop!
685
00:37:07,280 --> 00:37:08,280
All right, turn to the side.
686
00:37:08,610 --> 00:37:11,110
Flash me the belly. l want to see it. Come on.
687
00:37:12,450 --> 00:37:13,870
l know. l'm finally starting to show.
688
00:37:14,740 --> 00:37:16,120
-l'm gonna take one every week.
-Nice.
689
00:37:16,200 --> 00:37:17,580
-Watch you two grow.
-That's a good one.
690
00:37:17,620 --> 00:37:19,000
That's a good one, huh?
691
00:37:19,500 --> 00:37:20,960
Little peanut.
692
00:37:22,460 --> 00:37:24,380
l'm really glad you're here.
693
00:37:24,460 --> 00:37:26,380
-Yeah?
-Yeah.
694
00:37:26,460 --> 00:37:28,590
Where else would l be?
695
00:37:42,480 --> 00:37:44,810
Marco? Wake up.
696
00:37:46,980 --> 00:37:49,030
l'm bleeding.
697
00:38:15,390 --> 00:38:22,310
Reminding, rewinding
Removing, regretting
698
00:38:24,900 --> 00:38:26,520
Forgetting
699
00:38:28,860 --> 00:38:35,700
Your smiles at the wake and
Your tears at the wedding
700
00:38:38,290 --> 00:39:11,110
Forgetting
701
00:39:44,480 --> 00:39:46,140
lt's my fault. l wished it.
702
00:39:46,230 --> 00:39:49,190
Don't say that. lt's not your fault. Okay?
703
00:39:51,530 --> 00:39:53,610
l never even felt it kick.
704
00:40:00,370 --> 00:40:01,870
Congratulations. You're off the hook.
705
00:40:01,950 --> 00:40:04,250
Rosie, don't say that. Come on. Hey!
706
00:40:04,870 --> 00:40:06,460
Hey!
707
00:40:09,290 --> 00:40:10,630
Rosie, hey!
708
00:40:13,630 --> 00:40:15,880
We're not a couple.
709
00:40:15,970 --> 00:40:19,140
We've never even been on a real date,
you know.
710
00:40:19,850 --> 00:40:22,310
l think we can do ourselves a favor
and stop pretending.
711
00:40:22,390 --> 00:40:25,060
Rosie! Hey, it's me!
712
00:40:25,810 --> 00:40:27,690
Tequila shots! Don't judge.
713
00:40:30,440 --> 00:40:31,980
Shit, Ro. You okay?
714
00:40:32,020 --> 00:40:34,150
-Yeah, l want to get inside.
-Come on.
715
00:40:50,330 --> 00:40:51,380
Fighting fit.
716
00:40:52,710 --> 00:40:55,210
All right, that's perfect. Let's see the bump.
That's great.
717
00:40:55,300 --> 00:40:56,510
-Turn to your right.
-Can we hurry this up?
718
00:40:56,590 --> 00:40:57,720
He's pushing on my bladder.
719
00:40:57,800 --> 00:40:59,340
Great. All right. We got it.
720
00:40:59,390 --> 00:41:00,680
Okay, but did you get my rack?
721
00:41:00,760 --> 00:41:03,140
Because l am gonna need evidence
that l had these.
722
00:41:03,180 --> 00:41:04,510
-We've got proof.
-You got it? Okay.
723
00:41:04,600 --> 00:41:05,810
Yeah. That's great. Thanks, Jules.
724
00:41:05,850 --> 00:41:07,770
-Jules, that was great.
-Thank you.
725
00:41:07,850 --> 00:41:09,850
We are so excited to have you
as our Spring cover mom.
726
00:41:09,940 --> 00:41:10,980
Me, too.
727
00:41:11,150 --> 00:41:13,060
Listen, can we just try to keep it positive?
728
00:41:13,150 --> 00:41:14,520
You know, there's a lot of articles out there
729
00:41:14,570 --> 00:41:17,490
that make women over 35 who are pregnant
feel like crap.
730
00:41:17,700 --> 00:41:19,030
-Right.
-And l just don't want...
731
00:41:19,110 --> 00:41:21,910
-No, it's gonna be so...
-Sorry, l've got to take this.
732
00:41:23,950 --> 00:41:25,620
Hey, you. Did you watch it?
733
00:41:25,700 --> 00:41:28,790
That circumcision video you sent me?
Give me a little heads up next time.
734
00:41:28,870 --> 00:41:30,710
l was eating lunch. Now l'm scarred for life.
735
00:41:30,830 --> 00:41:34,790
Yeah, gross! Nobody needs to see
how the sausage gets made, Jules!
736
00:41:35,130 --> 00:41:37,550
l'm not gonna let somebody
hurt my baby like that.
737
00:41:37,630 --> 00:41:39,880
Jules, trust me.
He's not even gonna remember it.
738
00:41:40,550 --> 00:41:42,300
lt's not even medically necessary.
739
00:41:42,390 --> 00:41:45,640
And besides, it actually makes the penis
less sensitive.
740
00:41:45,720 --> 00:41:48,890
That's why you do it. Give the kid
some endurance, a fighting chance.
741
00:41:48,980 --> 00:41:51,640
He's perfect as he is. l don't get the point.
What is it?
742
00:41:52,610 --> 00:41:54,060
Because l'm Jewish?
743
00:41:54,650 --> 00:41:58,440
Half Jewish.
Christmas tree Jewish, that's what you said.
744
00:41:58,530 --> 00:42:00,900
But my penis is full Jew.
This is my jurisdiction.
745
00:42:00,990 --> 00:42:03,410
Okay, so l have no say in
what happens to my son?
746
00:42:04,370 --> 00:42:08,120
Besides, if you had your foreskin,
maybe l would like you a little bit more.
747
00:42:08,200 --> 00:42:09,290
How much more?
748
00:42:09,370 --> 00:42:11,120
A tip more.
749
00:42:11,830 --> 00:42:16,380
Look, l would feel shafted if we didn't do it.
750
00:42:16,420 --> 00:42:18,380
Can we discuss this weirdness later?
l'm working.
751
00:42:18,420 --> 00:42:20,170
Okay.
752
00:42:20,260 --> 00:42:21,340
l love you. Bye.
753
00:42:21,430 --> 00:42:22,590
Love you, too.
754
00:42:23,550 --> 00:42:26,390
Well, if it's any consolation,
l like an uncut guy.
755
00:42:27,430 --> 00:42:30,020
Yeah, l once banged my way
straight across Eastern Europe.
756
00:42:30,100 --> 00:42:31,770
lt was fun.
757
00:42:32,100 --> 00:42:35,100
l don't know, man. Out of the blue,
l got this call and suddenly...
758
00:42:35,150 --> 00:42:36,560
-Jordan!
-...we got this baby.
759
00:42:36,610 --> 00:42:38,270
-That's right, you got a baby.
-lt's not good.
760
00:42:38,400 --> 00:42:41,990
They said it was gonna be
at least a year or more, all right?
761
00:42:42,070 --> 00:42:45,200
And that's the one thing you can count on
with adoption, right? Time.
762
00:42:47,120 --> 00:42:49,660
l need that time to save, to get ready.
763
00:42:49,750 --> 00:42:51,250
There's no such thing as ready.
764
00:42:51,290 --> 00:42:53,870
You just jump on a moving train
and try not to die.
765
00:42:54,290 --> 00:42:56,630
-Great.
-What's up, man? You terrified?
766
00:42:56,670 --> 00:42:58,420
Because you should be.
767
00:42:58,460 --> 00:43:00,960
Here's what's gonna happen.
You're gonna get to the hospital room.
768
00:43:01,010 --> 00:43:05,090
And she's gonna be laying there
with her legs splayed wide open.
769
00:43:05,300 --> 00:43:07,300
My woman gave birth doggie-style.
770
00:43:09,100 --> 00:43:10,810
They can do that, you know.
771
00:43:10,890 --> 00:43:13,810
And then out is gonna slide a little miracle.
772
00:43:13,890 --> 00:43:17,980
Half you, half her, your DNA all mixed
together in one magical baby cocktail.
773
00:43:18,070 --> 00:43:19,650
The best day of your life.
774
00:43:19,730 --> 00:43:21,570
That's sweet, but Alex here is adopting.
775
00:43:22,820 --> 00:43:24,700
Yeah, do it that way. No fuss, no muss.
776
00:43:24,780 --> 00:43:26,360
Come on, Jordan!
777
00:43:28,620 --> 00:43:30,830
-What if he hates me?
-He will.
778
00:43:30,870 --> 00:43:33,750
l mean, what if he tries to kill me
in my sleep when he's 1 5?
779
00:43:33,830 --> 00:43:35,620
Well, then l guess
you're not a very good father.
780
00:43:35,710 --> 00:43:37,670
That's normal.
That's like every Greek tragedy.
781
00:43:37,710 --> 00:43:38,840
-Yeah.
-Come on, guys.
782
00:43:38,920 --> 00:43:40,710
l'm serious, okay? l need help.
783
00:43:40,840 --> 00:43:41,960
Dude, you're gonna be fine.
784
00:43:42,010 --> 00:43:44,300
You've just got to get over
your fear of babies. They can smell fear.
785
00:43:44,840 --> 00:43:46,180
Like bears or wives.
786
00:43:46,260 --> 00:43:48,050
You need some practice.
Here, hold Henry for a second.
787
00:43:48,140 --> 00:43:49,350
-No, no, no, no, no!
-Do not do that.
788
00:43:49,430 --> 00:43:51,470
-Do not touch his baby!
-Shut up!
789
00:43:51,520 --> 00:43:53,560
That kid is a grenade, and he will go off.
790
00:43:53,640 --> 00:43:55,890
You know what, start with Evander here.
She never cries.
791
00:43:56,020 --> 00:43:57,150
No, l'm cool, thank you.
792
00:43:57,190 --> 00:43:59,560
She fell off the changing table last week,
didn't make a sound.
793
00:43:59,900 --> 00:44:02,110
You dropped your kid off a changing table?
794
00:44:02,780 --> 00:44:04,360
How was that even possible?
795
00:44:04,570 --> 00:44:05,650
lt's very possible.
796
00:44:05,700 --> 00:44:08,700
lt's much more common than you think.
But you know what? Rule number two...
797
00:44:08,780 --> 00:44:10,280
-We don't judge.
-No judging.
798
00:44:10,490 --> 00:44:14,000
Stuffjust happens, okay?
Last week my kid ate a cigarette.
799
00:44:14,040 --> 00:44:16,040
l caught him playing in the dryer yesterday.
800
00:44:16,080 --> 00:44:17,500
l picked up the wrong baby from day care.
801
00:44:17,540 --> 00:44:19,250
Found my baby swimming in the toilet.
802
00:44:19,340 --> 00:44:22,710
And for the record,
the roll-off did not happen on my watch.
803
00:44:22,760 --> 00:44:24,710
-Dodged a bullet.
-No judging.
804
00:44:24,800 --> 00:44:27,220
-Come on. Come on.
-No, really, that's okay.
805
00:44:27,300 --> 00:44:29,390
-Come on. Come on. Here you go!
-That's all right.
806
00:44:29,640 --> 00:44:31,100
Good catch.
807
00:44:32,970 --> 00:44:34,020
Take her back.
808
00:44:34,180 --> 00:44:35,220
Take her back!
809
00:44:35,480 --> 00:44:38,060
l hope that adoption agency
has a return policy.
810
00:44:38,150 --> 00:44:40,520
Big help, guys. Glad l came out.
811
00:44:41,360 --> 00:44:42,730
lt's Davis!
812
00:44:43,860 --> 00:44:45,650
Davis! Davis! Davis!
813
00:44:45,740 --> 00:44:47,740
-Yeah, bro!
-D-Bone!
814
00:44:47,820 --> 00:44:48,910
-What is up?
-Boom.
815
00:44:48,990 --> 00:44:51,910
S'up fellas, kids, Jordan!
816
00:44:54,620 --> 00:44:56,620
Dude, this kid is like Mickey Rourke
in The Wrestler.
817
00:44:56,830 --> 00:45:00,250
l wish he was that well behaved.
He's more like Mickey Rourke in real life.
818
00:45:02,090 --> 00:45:03,290
So tall.
819
00:45:03,380 --> 00:45:04,920
-Been working out?
-Yeah.
820
00:45:04,960 --> 00:45:08,590
l missed out on high fives before.
l'll take one if you had a spare.
821
00:45:10,510 --> 00:45:12,300
-l got you, Craig.
-Thank you.
822
00:45:12,640 --> 00:45:14,850
-Sorry, Davis.
-All right, l'm out of here.
823
00:45:17,600 --> 00:45:19,060
Nice job, Craig.
824
00:45:44,800 --> 00:45:45,960
Kara, what time is it?
825
00:45:46,170 --> 00:45:48,550
l've got 20 minutes to make it
to the crib sale at Babies "R" Us.
826
00:45:49,090 --> 00:45:50,880
l've been totally cracking out on baby stuff.
827
00:45:51,090 --> 00:45:54,600
Sneaker-socks.
l've got my 2-in-1 swing rocker.
828
00:45:56,890 --> 00:45:59,060
What is with the face?
829
00:45:59,140 --> 00:46:01,480
Holly, l'm sorry to tell you this
830
00:46:02,020 --> 00:46:04,310
but we just had our budget meeting,
831
00:46:04,400 --> 00:46:06,480
and l don't know
that we're renewing your contract.
832
00:46:07,030 --> 00:46:10,990
l've got to cut down on all my freelancers.
You were the last one hired.
833
00:46:13,160 --> 00:46:15,070
Wait. But this is my main job.
834
00:46:16,830 --> 00:46:18,830
We're about to close on the house.
835
00:46:19,120 --> 00:46:23,790
l'm doing what l can to keep you,
but it just isn't looking good.
836
00:46:36,050 --> 00:46:37,260
Okay.
837
00:46:37,350 --> 00:46:38,890
-Don't hate me.
-No.
838
00:46:43,520 --> 00:46:45,100
Do me a favor?
839
00:46:46,110 --> 00:46:49,360
Don't tell Alex
until l can find something else. Okay?
840
00:46:49,940 --> 00:46:53,280
Okay.
841
00:46:53,530 --> 00:46:55,030
-l'm sorry.
-No.
842
00:46:56,700 --> 00:47:00,580
And reach! And push.
Okay now, break starfish formation.
843
00:47:00,660 --> 00:47:03,870
Let's get back in position.
l want opposite sets. Crunch it up.
844
00:47:03,920 --> 00:47:06,130
l want 1 0 of those on each side.
That's 20, people.
845
00:47:06,290 --> 00:47:08,840
And l need a minute.
And don't think l won't be watching you.
846
00:47:08,880 --> 00:47:10,000
Keep it moving.
847
00:47:10,630 --> 00:47:14,930
"l'm Not Circumcising My Baby."
Well done. Well done. Front page.
848
00:47:15,010 --> 00:47:18,390
Okay, look, l was gonna tell you.
l did not say this to them.
849
00:47:18,430 --> 00:47:21,720
They overheard our private conversation.
l would never talk to them about us.
850
00:47:21,850 --> 00:47:23,180
Why is this such a big deal to you?
851
00:47:23,230 --> 00:47:25,730
Because l don't think that it's right.
And l'm his mother.
852
00:47:25,810 --> 00:47:28,900
And l'm his father.
Parenthood is about compromise.
853
00:47:28,940 --> 00:47:30,780
-Well, then compromise, Evan.
-l have.
854
00:47:30,980 --> 00:47:33,860
l stay at your place.
We spend the holidays with your family.
855
00:47:34,070 --> 00:47:36,450
Yeah, but l have sacrificed
my entire body for this.
856
00:47:36,530 --> 00:47:38,240
So that means
you just get to win every argument?
857
00:47:38,330 --> 00:47:40,910
No, that means that in every relationship...
858
00:47:40,950 --> 00:47:43,410
What are you guys doing?
Come on! Pick it up!
859
00:47:44,670 --> 00:47:47,250
ln every relationship,
there's an alpha and a beta.
860
00:47:47,330 --> 00:47:48,420
-And l'm the alpha.
-And l'm the alpha.
861
00:47:48,500 --> 00:47:50,550
-No, l'm the alpha. No, l am!
-No, l'm the alpha. No, l am!
862
00:47:50,590 --> 00:47:51,710
Jinx.
863
00:47:55,590 --> 00:47:58,760
You know, l'm just gonna
stay at my place tonight.
864
00:48:02,140 --> 00:48:05,560
Hey, Jules! lf you're interested,
l never got snipped.
865
00:48:20,490 --> 00:48:22,290
Only one star
on the tango last week, Megan,
866
00:48:22,330 --> 00:48:24,080
but the samba's still to come.
How do you feel?
867
00:48:24,120 --> 00:48:26,160
I don't know.
l don't really care about the trophy.
868
00:48:26,250 --> 00:48:27,540
I'm here for Evan.
869
00:48:27,880 --> 00:48:29,460
Right, Papa-daddy?
870
00:48:29,500 --> 00:48:32,130
Evan has promised
he's gonna knock me up next.
871
00:48:32,300 --> 00:48:33,380
She's kidding, Jules.
872
00:48:33,460 --> 00:48:35,970
No, I'm not, Jules.
We're gonna be sister-wives!
873
00:48:36,590 --> 00:48:39,390
Evan's gonna drive us
to worship in his buggy.
874
00:48:48,150 --> 00:48:50,310
Why don't you take a break. l have this.
875
00:48:50,400 --> 00:48:51,940
Thanks.
876
00:49:02,740 --> 00:49:05,540
Okay E-invite, draft 38.
877
00:49:05,620 --> 00:49:06,660
Okay.
878
00:49:06,750 --> 00:49:11,000
"Let's shower Wendy and Gary Cooper
with light and love
879
00:49:11,040 --> 00:49:13,500
"to honor the arrival of their Mini Cooper."
880
00:49:13,550 --> 00:49:14,840
That's cute.
881
00:49:14,880 --> 00:49:19,050
And then l put a picture of a Mini Cooper
882
00:49:20,090 --> 00:49:21,220
at the end.
883
00:49:21,300 --> 00:49:22,350
Where did you get the picture?
884
00:49:22,390 --> 00:49:24,390
l stole it from the lnternet.
885
00:49:26,520 --> 00:49:30,270
Wendy, shut your pregnant face.
You do not want to see this.
886
00:49:32,860 --> 00:49:36,320
lt's okay. She's my mother-in-law-ish.
Shit, hi!
887
00:49:36,740 --> 00:49:38,150
Wendy, hi!
888
00:49:38,200 --> 00:49:40,280
Skyler, hi!
889
00:49:40,360 --> 00:49:41,490
Look at our bellies.
890
00:49:41,530 --> 00:49:44,200
We are like twins!
Except l'm actually having twins.
891
00:49:44,410 --> 00:49:49,250
You really love to remind me about that
every time. Hi.
892
00:49:49,540 --> 00:49:51,870
l just came by to personally invite y'all
to our baby shower.
893
00:49:52,290 --> 00:49:55,800
Wow, this is your shower invite.
894
00:49:56,840 --> 00:50:00,630
Look, l know that Ramsey and Gary have not
always gotten along so well
895
00:50:00,720 --> 00:50:02,260
but we are family. Okay?
896
00:50:02,340 --> 00:50:04,720
And it would just mean the world to me
if y'all came.
897
00:50:04,850 --> 00:50:08,060
Of course, Skyler. That's... You...
898
00:50:10,100 --> 00:50:11,140
Wow!
899
00:50:11,350 --> 00:50:12,480
What is it?
900
00:50:14,650 --> 00:50:17,730
lt's Mini Coopers.
901
00:50:18,610 --> 00:50:19,650
Beep beep!
902
00:50:19,990 --> 00:50:22,360
Beep beep! Beep beep...
903
00:50:24,700 --> 00:50:27,910
You know, because there's two of them
and there's two in here, and they're pink.
904
00:50:28,080 --> 00:50:29,250
Yeah.
905
00:50:29,370 --> 00:50:32,040
So, Skyler, seven months.
How are you feeling?
906
00:50:32,580 --> 00:50:35,250
With the side effects, you know.
Because l know that
907
00:50:35,840 --> 00:50:39,010
at this point in the pregnancy, acne and
908
00:50:39,090 --> 00:50:42,800
bleeding gums, constipation,
it's all totally normal. Totally normal.
909
00:50:43,220 --> 00:50:46,180
When my sister was pregnant,
she got herpes.
910
00:50:46,510 --> 00:50:49,140
No, that's... She didn't get...
Not from being pregnant.
911
00:50:49,220 --> 00:50:51,930
No, l feel so whole.
912
00:50:52,270 --> 00:50:56,940
You know? And just feminine.
With all this life running through me.
913
00:50:57,020 --> 00:51:00,690
l felt the exact same way
when l had my phantom pregnancy.
914
00:51:02,450 --> 00:51:03,490
Don't pay attention to her.
915
00:51:03,950 --> 00:51:07,200
But, yeah, l mean, l just... lt's beautiful.
916
00:51:07,280 --> 00:51:09,830
But what am l saying?
You know exactly what this is like.
917
00:51:10,120 --> 00:51:11,410
Totally.
918
00:51:11,790 --> 00:51:14,790
Well, l just came
to drop off that little invitation.
919
00:51:14,880 --> 00:51:16,670
And l'm gonna go to my pregger 'lates.
920
00:51:16,960 --> 00:51:18,960
Sounds pregger-ific.
921
00:51:19,710 --> 00:51:21,460
-All right, one more time.
-Bring it in.
922
00:51:21,510 --> 00:51:22,970
Okay. l'll see y'all there?
923
00:51:23,050 --> 00:51:25,630
-Yes, l will tell Gary.
-Okay. Thank you.
924
00:51:25,720 --> 00:51:27,180
-Yeah.
-Okay.
925
00:51:27,720 --> 00:51:29,470
Hey, Wendy,
do you mind if l take one of these?
926
00:51:29,560 --> 00:51:32,180
-What's that?
-Holly Castillo Photography.
927
00:51:32,270 --> 00:51:35,390
Ramsey's been on me about getting
one of these pregnancy portraits done, so...
928
00:51:35,650 --> 00:51:39,730
Well, Holly's the best,
so she'll make you look amazing-er.
929
00:51:40,030 --> 00:51:41,070
Bye.
930
00:51:41,320 --> 00:51:43,360
Bye. Bye.
931
00:51:43,990 --> 00:51:45,070
Bye!
932
00:51:46,280 --> 00:51:50,030
l mean, look at her. No cellulite.
Not even in daylight.
933
00:51:50,290 --> 00:51:51,990
She's wearing six-inch heels.
934
00:51:52,200 --> 00:51:54,910
God, she's like
a magical pregnancy unicorn.
935
00:51:55,000 --> 00:51:57,290
Gary is gonna shit a sideways brick
when he sees this.
936
00:51:59,460 --> 00:52:03,340
Hey, come on! We started Mini Cooper.
That's our thing.
937
00:52:03,840 --> 00:52:05,170
We own it, right?
938
00:52:05,260 --> 00:52:07,180
All right! Thank you.
Hey, a little heads up, America.
939
00:52:07,220 --> 00:52:08,800
-Do we have to watch this?
-Yes.
940
00:52:08,850 --> 00:52:11,760
While we send these four home to train
on their own before our live finale
941
00:52:11,850 --> 00:52:15,430
some of our previous seasons' contestants
are going to get a little surprise.
942
00:52:15,890 --> 00:52:18,270
That's right. l'm gonna be dropping in
on some of you guys
943
00:52:18,360 --> 00:52:21,230
to see how you're keeping the weight off.
You've been warned.
944
00:52:23,900 --> 00:52:26,490
They can't get someone else to fly around
and do these interviews?
945
00:52:26,740 --> 00:52:28,860
l don't like you traveling this late.
946
00:52:28,910 --> 00:52:31,490
Nobody's asking you to stop doing yourjob.
947
00:52:31,540 --> 00:52:33,540
Besides, these are my contestants, Evan.
948
00:52:33,580 --> 00:52:36,710
l was there when they lost the weight
and l want to be there for them now.
949
00:52:36,790 --> 00:52:40,670
You're pushing yourself too hard, Jules.
Especially at your age.
950
00:52:40,750 --> 00:52:44,210
Wow! Thanks. That's super-supportive.
l appreciate that.
951
00:52:44,260 --> 00:52:46,090
What, l'm not even
supposed to mention reality?
952
00:52:46,220 --> 00:52:51,140
l am healthy. l have a low blood pressure.
Not that you're helping me any.
953
00:52:51,220 --> 00:52:53,890
Look, l just think someone should
go with you and little Jackson there.
954
00:52:53,930 --> 00:52:55,680
Well, you know what, l have my crew,
955
00:52:55,770 --> 00:52:58,350
and you are welcome to leave your show
and come along.
956
00:52:58,440 --> 00:52:59,980
And we are not naming him Jackson.
957
00:53:00,060 --> 00:53:01,400
You liked it last week.
958
00:53:01,480 --> 00:53:04,780
Obviously you caught me
in a moment of weakness.
959
00:53:04,860 --> 00:53:07,400
Honestly, God, seriously, l sometimes think
960
00:53:07,530 --> 00:53:10,610
that it would just be so much easier
if l could do this on my own.
961
00:53:10,700 --> 00:53:12,830
Really? You think that?
962
00:53:14,120 --> 00:53:15,330
Come on.
963
00:53:15,410 --> 00:53:18,000
Evan, we danced on a show
for three months together
964
00:53:18,080 --> 00:53:20,540
and suddenly we're supposed to
agree on everything?
965
00:53:20,670 --> 00:53:23,460
Fine. Why don't you make every decision
about our child's entire life
966
00:53:23,550 --> 00:53:26,010
and just send me an email
when you've got it figured out.
967
00:53:35,850 --> 00:53:37,350
Why do you do that, Jules?
968
00:53:38,850 --> 00:53:42,100
l know you've been busting ass with work
and getting everything ready for the baby.
969
00:53:42,150 --> 00:53:43,400
-l just wanted to...
-Alex, about work.
970
00:53:43,440 --> 00:53:44,570
-There's something that came up...
-No, no!
971
00:53:44,610 --> 00:53:47,650
No shop talk tonight, all right?
972
00:53:47,740 --> 00:53:49,150
l just want to remind you
973
00:53:49,280 --> 00:53:52,570
that even though we're gonna be parents,
we can still kick it old school. All right?
974
00:53:52,620 --> 00:53:54,740
Alex and Holly style.
975
00:53:56,450 --> 00:53:59,290
Surprise!
976
00:54:00,210 --> 00:54:02,370
Happy Baby Shower, bitches!
977
00:54:06,800 --> 00:54:10,510
Might as well face it
You're addicted to love
978
00:54:11,470 --> 00:54:14,640
Listen to that. Someone call the cops.
They're murdering a song.
979
00:54:14,720 --> 00:54:15,930
-l know, it hurts.
-Literally.
980
00:54:15,970 --> 00:54:18,430
l love it when you call me Big Poppa
981
00:54:18,480 --> 00:54:21,640
Throw your hands in the air
lf you're a true player
982
00:54:21,730 --> 00:54:23,940
l love it when you call me Big Poppa
983
00:54:24,150 --> 00:54:26,190
-We should have another baby.
-Oh, yeah!
984
00:54:26,270 --> 00:54:28,690
Come on, you gonna sweat that
weave out tonight.
985
00:54:28,820 --> 00:54:30,990
We got our twins.
Let's go for triplets, all right?
986
00:54:31,200 --> 00:54:33,660
No, no, no, that's baby juice!
987
00:54:37,830 --> 00:54:38,830
To us.
988
00:54:38,910 --> 00:54:40,580
To actually getting Rosie out of the house!
989
00:54:40,660 --> 00:54:42,920
ln something other than
stained pajama pants.
990
00:54:59,350 --> 00:55:00,680
l'll be right back.
991
00:55:03,560 --> 00:55:06,060
Don't you want a baby?
992
00:55:07,730 --> 00:55:10,900
Don't you want one, ohhh!
993
00:55:13,700 --> 00:55:17,530
Oh, wow. lt's 9:30, guys. lt's 9:30.
We've got to go. Yeah, we got to go.
994
00:55:17,620 --> 00:55:18,700
-What?
-Come on!
995
00:55:18,740 --> 00:55:20,540
-We've got to go. lt's 9:30.
-Come on, one more song.
996
00:55:20,620 --> 00:55:22,000
-Put your drink down! We're going.
-Not tonight!
997
00:55:22,040 --> 00:55:23,370
l'm gonna wait around front!
998
00:55:23,750 --> 00:55:25,870
Vic, don't go! Where are you going?
999
00:55:25,920 --> 00:55:27,960
lf we're not back by 1 0:00,
the baby-sitter charges double.
1000
00:55:28,040 --> 00:55:29,460
-And steals shit.
-Come on!
1001
00:55:29,550 --> 00:55:31,260
-Who's your... What?
-You guys.
1002
00:55:31,340 --> 00:55:32,880
-Go home.
-No, stay.
1003
00:55:32,970 --> 00:55:36,050
Have sex. Because it's gonna be a while.
1004
00:55:36,090 --> 00:55:38,140
-Okay.
-You're driving.
1005
00:55:38,760 --> 00:55:40,510
Thanks, Ms. K. You done us up right.
1006
00:55:40,560 --> 00:55:43,770
Hey, no problem. lt's the least l can do,
since Holly lost herjob.
1007
00:55:44,730 --> 00:55:45,770
What?
1008
00:55:47,610 --> 00:55:49,110
l'm sorry.
1009
00:55:50,400 --> 00:55:52,110
Baby shower!
1010
00:55:59,200 --> 00:56:00,410
Rosie!
1011
00:56:00,910 --> 00:56:02,410
Hey, Rosie?
1012
00:56:03,960 --> 00:56:05,410
Hey, stop!
1013
00:56:05,620 --> 00:56:08,040
Hey, Marco! l didn't see you.
1014
00:56:08,420 --> 00:56:10,590
That's bullshit. You looked right at me.
1015
00:56:12,130 --> 00:56:14,210
How you doing? You okay?
1016
00:56:14,920 --> 00:56:16,380
What are you doing here?
1017
00:56:16,550 --> 00:56:19,090
l'm just seeing my favorite band.
l asked how you were.
1018
00:56:24,930 --> 00:56:26,940
Sorry, l can't do this.
1019
00:56:28,270 --> 00:56:29,770
Rosie, l miss you.
1020
00:56:34,780 --> 00:56:36,610
Yeah, l miss me, too.
1021
00:56:38,660 --> 00:56:40,450
Well, l guess it just takes time.
1022
00:56:41,240 --> 00:56:43,790
Marco! What are you doing?
1023
00:56:47,790 --> 00:56:49,790
Really? How much time?
1024
00:56:50,750 --> 00:56:52,130
She's just a friend.
1025
00:56:56,840 --> 00:56:59,970
You lost your one steady gig
and you didn't even tell me.
1026
00:57:00,010 --> 00:57:01,930
-Are you kidding me?
-l know. l'm sorry.
1027
00:57:01,970 --> 00:57:03,310
l was just trying to get something else
1028
00:57:03,350 --> 00:57:04,770
-before you noticed.
-Right.
1029
00:57:04,810 --> 00:57:09,650
So it would be "Hey, l got some newjobs,"
and not "Holy shit, we can't afford our life."
1030
00:57:09,730 --> 00:57:12,020
You know, l know you've been
so worried about saving and the house...
1031
00:57:12,110 --> 00:57:13,690
Yeah, we're in this together.
1032
00:57:13,780 --> 00:57:15,980
Here l am,
trying to get ready for something that's...
1033
00:57:16,070 --> 00:57:17,150
Oh, my God!
1034
00:57:17,240 --> 00:57:18,950
-What?
-l knew it.
1035
00:57:18,990 --> 00:57:20,160
You're not even ready?
1036
00:57:20,240 --> 00:57:22,160
Look, l'm not like you, okay?
1037
00:57:22,200 --> 00:57:25,330
l can't just look at a picture
and feel some magical bond.
1038
00:57:25,370 --> 00:57:27,160
And you lying to me isn't helping.
1039
00:57:27,210 --> 00:57:30,330
-Look, l know, okay? l screwed up.
-Yeah. You did.
1040
00:57:32,500 --> 00:57:34,040
l just...
1041
00:57:36,170 --> 00:57:40,220
l just couldn't handle
another thing being my fault.
1042
00:57:41,340 --> 00:57:43,430
Okay? l'm the one with the bad eggs.
1043
00:57:43,850 --> 00:57:47,980
l'm the one who made us spend
the 401 K money on lVF.
1044
00:57:49,690 --> 00:57:54,690
And l'm the one who can't do the one thing
a woman is supposed to be able to do.
1045
00:57:54,860 --> 00:57:57,900
Holly, that's enough. Stop it.
1046
00:58:08,830 --> 00:58:10,960
You don't even want this, do you?
1047
00:58:11,710 --> 00:58:13,210
l never said that.
1048
00:58:14,380 --> 00:58:16,130
Not out loud.
1049
00:58:16,920 --> 00:58:18,800
l can't believe you didn't tell him.
1050
00:58:19,760 --> 00:58:21,970
You know what? Glass houses, Craig!
1051
00:58:22,720 --> 00:58:26,560
l know all about how you call your son
"Henry" when Kara's not around.
1052
00:58:26,640 --> 00:58:28,930
-Holly, let's go. Let's go.
-You what?
1053
00:58:29,600 --> 00:58:31,600
You don't like the name "Henri"?
1054
00:58:31,690 --> 00:58:36,360
That is such a bold-faced lie!
He's obviously joking!
1055
00:58:36,730 --> 00:58:38,320
Guess who's not getting any tonight?
1056
00:58:38,530 --> 00:58:39,570
First rule, Alex!
1057
00:58:40,030 --> 00:58:43,910
An obvious joke that Latins with their Latin,
spicy Latin sense of humor...
1058
00:58:44,030 --> 00:58:45,570
You've seen Univision. He was kidding.
1059
00:58:45,620 --> 00:58:47,910
When you look like him, you can have
1060
00:58:47,990 --> 00:58:50,410
-a spicy sense of humor, stupid! All right?
-Get in the car.
1061
00:58:50,460 --> 00:58:52,290
-He was obviously kidding.
-You get in the car!
1062
00:58:52,370 --> 00:58:54,080
Don't you talk to me like that!
1063
00:58:54,630 --> 00:58:56,500
Oh, my God, l am so sorry.
1064
00:58:56,590 --> 00:58:58,500
-Do not touch me.
-l love you so much.
1065
00:58:58,590 --> 00:59:00,960
-Shut up. l don't want to hear it.
-l love you so much.
1066
00:59:01,050 --> 00:59:02,510
Stop talking!
1067
00:59:05,260 --> 00:59:07,430
Okay, here we are in Atlanta, Georgia.
1068
00:59:07,510 --> 00:59:10,680
Home of one of the audience favorites
from Season 4.
1069
00:59:10,770 --> 00:59:12,180
Okay, we're popping in on him
1070
00:59:12,270 --> 00:59:14,940
and see how he's maintaining his weight
and healthy lifestyle.
1071
00:59:14,980 --> 00:59:16,400
Here we go.
1072
00:59:16,440 --> 00:59:17,940
Drop the pig, Gary Cooper!
1073
00:59:17,980 --> 00:59:19,270
-What?
-That's right.
1074
00:59:19,360 --> 00:59:20,900
Jules! Oh, my...
1075
00:59:20,940 --> 00:59:22,150
-lt's a documentary?
-Hi!
1076
00:59:22,240 --> 00:59:24,530
-No. lt's a real thing. lt's live.
-What do we got there?
1077
00:59:24,610 --> 00:59:27,740
This isn't actually for me.
l was just picking this up for a friend.
1078
00:59:27,780 --> 00:59:29,910
Remember this guy? See that guy?
1079
00:59:30,250 --> 00:59:31,750
-You remember him?
-Oh, jeez.
1080
00:59:31,790 --> 00:59:33,790
This is a one-time thing. lt's a treat.
1081
00:59:33,830 --> 00:59:35,540
That's what l thought you might say.
1082
00:59:35,630 --> 00:59:37,670
We've been doing a little recon on you.
1083
00:59:37,750 --> 00:59:39,960
-Nice sweater, by the way.
-Thank you.
1084
00:59:40,050 --> 00:59:42,210
My wife is pregnant, Jules, okay?
1085
00:59:42,300 --> 00:59:46,430
And you know, it's really common for guys
to put on a little weight as their wife does.
1086
00:59:46,470 --> 00:59:49,050
lt's called "Couvade Syndrome"
or "Sympathetic Pregnancy."
1087
00:59:49,140 --> 00:59:51,010
No. lt's called a crutch, Gary.
1088
00:59:51,100 --> 00:59:53,350
Come on. We need to deal with
what the real issue is.
1089
00:59:53,430 --> 00:59:56,400
You need to deal with it today,
not 1 00 pounds from now.
1090
00:59:56,480 --> 00:59:57,810
Do you wanna be this guy again?
1091
00:59:58,150 --> 00:59:59,230
Could we stop this, please?
1092
00:59:59,320 --> 01:00:01,020
Because you don't even understand
what l'm talking about.
1093
01:00:01,110 --> 01:00:03,650
-l don't understand?
-lt's not an issue you have in your life.
1094
01:00:03,740 --> 01:00:05,490
-Stop it.
-Ever since l've had this belly
1095
01:00:05,780 --> 01:00:08,490
people think it's okay,
not just to have an opinion about me
1096
01:00:08,580 --> 01:00:10,830
but to have an opinion about my baby.
1097
01:00:10,870 --> 01:00:14,040
Seriously, in what world
is it okay for a complete stranger
1098
01:00:14,120 --> 01:00:17,000
to comment on my son's penis
before he's even born?
1099
01:00:17,580 --> 01:00:21,500
Jesus! Somebody, anybody,
please ask me what l'm craving.
1100
01:00:23,170 --> 01:00:24,260
What are you craving?
1101
01:00:24,670 --> 01:00:26,300
That looks pretty good.
1102
01:00:26,510 --> 01:00:28,300
They are really good.
1103
01:00:28,340 --> 01:00:29,640
They're not good for you,
but they're really good.
1104
01:00:30,350 --> 01:00:33,180
Okay, we can cut that part out.
Are we still rolling? We good?
1105
01:00:33,310 --> 01:00:34,520
We good? Okay, here we go.
1106
01:00:34,560 --> 01:00:38,100
We are gonna deal with this issue, Gary,
in a very healthy way.
1107
01:00:38,190 --> 01:00:40,730
-Okay
-l wanna hear you say, "l can do it!"
1108
01:00:40,820 --> 01:00:42,360
-Just like you did in Season 4.
-Okay.
1109
01:00:42,400 --> 01:00:44,650
-l wanna hear it. Say it! "l can do it!"
-l can do it!
1110
01:00:44,690 --> 01:00:46,190
-l can do it! l can do it!
-l can do it!
1111
01:00:46,240 --> 01:00:48,360
-You and l are gonna do it together, Gary.
-Okay!
1112
01:00:48,410 --> 01:00:50,320
You and l, here we go.
We're gonna do lunges. Ready?
1113
01:00:50,370 --> 01:00:53,540
And l want it deep, to the knee,
and squeeze back up.
1114
01:00:53,580 --> 01:00:54,660
One more. Come on in.
1115
01:00:54,870 --> 01:00:56,040
Let's go.
1116
01:00:57,000 --> 01:00:59,500
-Jules! Oh, my God! Are you okay?
-Oh, my God!
1117
01:00:59,710 --> 01:01:02,000
-Are you okay?
-No! l'm okay. Oh, my God!
1118
01:01:02,210 --> 01:01:04,840
-Gary. Someone's gotta call 9-1 -1 .
-Okay, yeah.
1119
01:01:04,920 --> 01:01:05,960
Oh, God! No!
1120
01:01:14,060 --> 01:01:15,060
What's up, guys?
1121
01:01:17,690 --> 01:01:21,230
Guys! Hey! Whoa, whoa! Wait up.
1122
01:01:21,400 --> 01:01:23,900
Freeze! Don't take another step!
1123
01:01:24,530 --> 01:01:28,070
You told your wife
Craig likes to call Henri "Henry"?
1124
01:01:28,320 --> 01:01:31,870
-She did not take it well.
-Okay, my bad, my bad. l'm sorry.
1125
01:01:32,080 --> 01:01:34,700
We're here to let off a little steam.
Not break up families.
1126
01:01:35,370 --> 01:01:39,210
Craig shouldn't have to see his kids only
on weekends 'cause you got a big mouth.
1127
01:01:39,250 --> 01:01:41,420
Hey, l'm sorry. l wasn't thinking.
1128
01:01:41,460 --> 01:01:42,790
Darn right you weren't thinking.
1129
01:01:43,460 --> 01:01:46,210
You wanna adopt? Adopt some new friends.
1130
01:01:46,420 --> 01:01:48,130
Come on, guys. Really?
1131
01:01:48,380 --> 01:01:49,930
Unbelievable!
1132
01:01:52,600 --> 01:01:54,720
Craig! Come on, Craig!
1133
01:01:54,810 --> 01:01:57,470
Hey, don't think
that l won't punch you in the neck
1134
01:01:57,560 --> 01:01:58,890
just 'cause l have an infant strapped to me.
1135
01:01:58,940 --> 01:02:02,770
-l still have full range of motion.
-Look, l'm in crisis here. All right?
1136
01:02:04,440 --> 01:02:06,610
We had to pull out of the house.
1137
01:02:06,650 --> 01:02:09,780
Now Holly won't even talk to me.
She thinks l don't want the baby.
1138
01:02:09,990 --> 01:02:11,280
Well, do you?
1139
01:02:11,780 --> 01:02:12,990
Yeah.
1140
01:02:13,320 --> 01:02:14,490
Really?
1141
01:02:17,080 --> 01:02:19,450
Okay, l don't know. l don't know.
1142
01:02:19,960 --> 01:02:23,960
l mean, you said
this is where happiness goes to die.
1143
01:02:24,090 --> 01:02:25,540
Henry cries if you touch him.
1144
01:02:26,630 --> 01:02:28,960
You found your kid in the toilet, right?
1145
01:02:29,720 --> 01:02:32,760
Jordan is a spaz.
1146
01:02:35,260 --> 01:02:36,890
You're the spaz.
1147
01:02:37,140 --> 01:02:40,560
You just don't get it. We love being dads.
1148
01:02:41,060 --> 01:02:44,480
When l was young,
l used to think l was so happy.
1149
01:02:44,810 --> 01:02:47,150
But now, l know l'm happy.
1150
01:02:47,650 --> 01:02:49,530
Exhausted
1151
01:02:49,610 --> 01:02:51,450
but happy.
1152
01:02:51,490 --> 01:02:53,660
l wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.
1153
01:02:53,820 --> 01:02:57,410
Yeah. You don't know true love
till you've wiped someone's butt.
1154
01:02:58,410 --> 01:02:59,750
Look at me, man.
1155
01:03:00,000 --> 01:03:04,000
l love my baby so much,
l worry l'm gonna eat him.
1156
01:03:06,090 --> 01:03:10,090
l am a lackluster husband
but an above-average dad.
1157
01:03:11,510 --> 01:03:13,180
You gotta figure it out, bro.
1158
01:03:13,430 --> 01:03:15,340
You're on your own.
1159
01:03:17,140 --> 01:03:18,180
Burn!
1160
01:03:19,930 --> 01:03:22,930
That's it? What about the "no judging" rule?
1161
01:03:23,520 --> 01:03:26,020
'Cause l'm feeling a little judged right now.
1162
01:03:27,110 --> 01:03:29,020
You broke the code, bro.
1163
01:03:29,860 --> 01:03:31,150
Yeah! Go do your pull-ups!
1164
01:03:33,360 --> 01:03:36,910
Davis! Davis!
1165
01:03:37,450 --> 01:03:39,370
The hospital said l could fly pretty soon.
1166
01:03:39,830 --> 01:03:40,870
Nice try.
1167
01:03:41,160 --> 01:03:44,580
You need to stay in bed so we can keep
your contractions under control.
1168
01:03:44,670 --> 01:03:46,920
-You're having this baby in Atlanta.
-You don't understand.
1169
01:03:47,000 --> 01:03:49,500
l have to get back to L.A.
l have to finish my show.
1170
01:03:49,550 --> 01:03:52,380
And what?
Have your water break at 30,000 feet?
1171
01:03:52,800 --> 01:03:54,550
l climbed Everest, okay?
1172
01:03:54,880 --> 01:03:58,220
l'm pretty confident l can keep this baby in
until l get home.
1173
01:03:58,260 --> 01:04:00,060
l can do that, okay? l can do it.
1174
01:04:00,560 --> 01:04:03,480
No. You can't. You need to stay in bed.
1175
01:04:03,680 --> 01:04:05,560
Honestly, you don't have a choice.
1176
01:04:06,900 --> 01:04:10,190
Now who can you call
to come take care of you?
1177
01:04:12,150 --> 01:04:15,320
Gary, honey, slow down!
You're practically sprinting!
1178
01:04:15,780 --> 01:04:17,160
Okay. Okay.
1179
01:04:18,700 --> 01:04:20,200
Squeaks, are you sure you feel all right?
1180
01:04:20,240 --> 01:04:21,910
Quit asking me! l'm great!
1181
01:04:22,410 --> 01:04:25,410
Oh, my...
Sweet bird of paradise, what is that smell?
1182
01:04:26,080 --> 01:04:27,290
ls that you?
1183
01:04:27,380 --> 01:04:30,540
lf you must know it's the baby.
1184
01:04:30,670 --> 01:04:34,260
The baby has gas, okay?
The poor little thing can't help itself.
1185
01:04:34,420 --> 01:04:36,840
-Kinda smelt like you, actually.
-Don't talk about our baby like that!
1186
01:04:36,930 --> 01:04:38,180
-Hi.
-Hi.
1187
01:04:38,760 --> 01:04:40,760
-Wow, thank you!
-Thank you.
1188
01:04:45,430 --> 01:04:47,270
The baby just peed itself a little.
1189
01:04:49,230 --> 01:04:53,280
Are you sure that speaking at the Kids Expo
next week is the best idea?
1190
01:04:53,360 --> 01:04:55,440
l need support!
1191
01:04:55,530 --> 01:04:58,700
Hey! Look who made it!
1192
01:04:59,320 --> 01:05:02,450
Come on back!
These girls have got it goin' on back there!
1193
01:05:02,540 --> 01:05:05,330
You too, Gar. Come on!
Your mom's gonna be glad to see you.
1194
01:05:05,410 --> 01:05:08,790
Still not my mom. She was born in '86.
1195
01:05:10,130 --> 01:05:11,630
All right.
1196
01:05:22,810 --> 01:05:25,970
-Kickin' ass, J.B.
-Wendy! Come here, girl!
1197
01:05:26,020 --> 01:05:27,640
Foot massages and henna tats!
1198
01:05:27,690 --> 01:05:29,310
Neat!
1199
01:05:30,480 --> 01:05:33,980
Hey, you sure it's not Wendy
who's having the twins?
1200
01:05:34,030 --> 01:05:35,440
Dad.
1201
01:05:35,480 --> 01:05:40,160
Son, you gotta learn to lighten up,
or it's gonna be a hell of a long day.
1202
01:05:40,490 --> 01:05:43,240
Oh, my gosh!
1203
01:05:48,290 --> 01:05:49,920
-Hey, Gary.
-Hey.
1204
01:05:50,000 --> 01:05:52,460
We saw you on that Lose it and Weep show.
1205
01:05:52,500 --> 01:05:55,340
My wife and l cried every pound you lost.
1206
01:05:55,380 --> 01:05:58,380
-Don't you gain it back.
-Yeah, yeah. l'm working on it.
1207
01:05:58,510 --> 01:06:01,510
-Here you go, pal. Drink up.
-No, thanks. l'm good.
1208
01:06:01,590 --> 01:06:03,970
So, what is it like
to be the son of a racing legend?
1209
01:06:04,010 --> 01:06:06,060
-Yeah!
-Do you ever get on the track with that guy?
1210
01:06:06,140 --> 01:06:07,310
One time.
1211
01:06:07,350 --> 01:06:10,520
The Great Go-Kart Beatdown of 1 989.
1212
01:06:11,230 --> 01:06:13,730
-Dad, they don't wanna hear about this.
-Yeah, we do.
1213
01:06:13,810 --> 01:06:15,020
l won.
1214
01:06:15,110 --> 01:06:16,440
He cheated. He cheated.
1215
01:06:16,530 --> 01:06:19,860
No. lt was just an exercise
in gamesmanship.
1216
01:06:19,900 --> 01:06:21,950
And beatdownsmanship.
1217
01:06:22,030 --> 01:06:23,700
Yeah, you win again, Dad.
1218
01:06:23,780 --> 01:06:27,200
Hey, where are you going?
You can't walk away from a fresh margarita!
1219
01:06:27,330 --> 01:06:29,040
l'm not supposed to drink my calories, Dad!
1220
01:06:29,120 --> 01:06:31,500
We can always make it a Skinny Girl!
1221
01:06:32,630 --> 01:06:33,670
He's great.
1222
01:06:34,210 --> 01:06:36,340
He's a great kid, isn't he?
1223
01:06:39,010 --> 01:06:40,300
Ramsey Cooper.
1224
01:06:40,800 --> 01:06:42,630
l will not have my son treated like that.
1225
01:06:43,090 --> 01:06:44,260
Put your drink down,
1226
01:06:44,680 --> 01:06:47,640
get your ass out there
and fix what needs fixing.
1227
01:06:47,850 --> 01:06:50,600
We were just having a little fun.
l'm just trying to toughen him up.
1228
01:06:51,020 --> 01:06:54,060
He needs to heal, okay?
And you need to listen. l mean it, Ram Bam.
1229
01:06:54,150 --> 01:06:58,230
l will not have these babies come into this
world when there is strife in our family.
1230
01:06:58,280 --> 01:06:59,320
Now go.
1231
01:06:59,740 --> 01:07:01,360
Put your drink down.
1232
01:07:03,410 --> 01:07:04,450
And go.
1233
01:07:04,700 --> 01:07:06,280
Okay, Tater Tot.
1234
01:07:11,540 --> 01:07:14,750
lt's okay. Just 'cause you have a bad dad
doesn't mean you're gonna be a bad dad.
1235
01:07:15,080 --> 01:07:17,590
You will not ridicule, you will not compete.
1236
01:07:17,670 --> 01:07:19,340
l will not compete!
1237
01:07:19,420 --> 01:07:20,920
Are you talking to yourself again?
1238
01:07:21,010 --> 01:07:24,180
l need some alone time, Dad.
Need some alone time.
1239
01:07:24,470 --> 01:07:26,090
l will not compete!
1240
01:07:28,760 --> 01:07:30,430
You can't get rid of me that easy.
1241
01:07:30,520 --> 01:07:33,440
-Oh, God! Dad, l'm not racing.
-Neither am l.
1242
01:07:33,850 --> 01:07:35,480
l'm not falling for that trick.
1243
01:07:35,690 --> 01:07:37,610
Just get it off your chest, son.
1244
01:07:37,820 --> 01:07:39,940
l'm sick of competing with you, okay?
1245
01:07:39,980 --> 01:07:41,900
That's it. Just keep going. l'm listening.
1246
01:07:42,070 --> 01:07:44,990
-You named me Gary Cooper, for chrissake!
-Get it all out.
1247
01:07:45,110 --> 01:07:48,450
You're the reason l got fat!
You are the reason l got fat!
1248
01:07:48,490 --> 01:07:52,080
Whoa, ouch! That hurt. Slow down. Stop.
1249
01:07:54,750 --> 01:07:56,210
Really?
1250
01:08:02,630 --> 01:08:06,800
l guess l've been kind of a shit sandwich
in the old Dad department, huh?
1251
01:08:09,060 --> 01:08:12,430
l saw every episode
of your Lose it season.
1252
01:08:12,640 --> 01:08:16,140
l have the whole thing on DVD, Blu-ray.
1253
01:08:17,690 --> 01:08:19,440
And sometimes,
1254
01:08:19,480 --> 01:08:24,150
l stay up at night and l watch it
over and over again.
1255
01:08:25,240 --> 01:08:26,990
Really?
1256
01:08:27,070 --> 01:08:28,240
Yeah.
1257
01:08:29,870 --> 01:08:31,620
This is hard for me.
1258
01:08:32,660 --> 01:08:35,790
But there's something
that l really wanna tell you.
1259
01:08:36,290 --> 01:08:37,790
Okay, Dad.
1260
01:08:39,380 --> 01:08:41,340
Beat me home
and we never have to race again!
1261
01:08:41,420 --> 01:08:43,000
God damn it!
1262
01:08:43,050 --> 01:08:46,590
This is not good parenting!
l'm gonna beat you!
1263
01:08:47,680 --> 01:08:48,970
This is so ridiculous!
1264
01:08:50,390 --> 01:08:53,060
-Hey, Bob! Hey, Dave!
-Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
1265
01:08:53,270 --> 01:08:54,520
Sorry!
1266
01:08:54,640 --> 01:08:56,270
Where you going? Narnia?
1267
01:08:56,480 --> 01:08:59,520
You wanna go crazy? Let's go crazy!
1268
01:09:02,360 --> 01:09:04,110
Now that's the Cooper spirit!
1269
01:09:04,190 --> 01:09:05,400
Yes.
1270
01:09:07,110 --> 01:09:08,610
-Rubbing is racing!
-Hey!
1271
01:09:09,160 --> 01:09:11,120
Here's a little love tap for you.
1272
01:09:12,620 --> 01:09:13,910
You're still cheating!
1273
01:09:13,990 --> 01:09:16,040
Get ready! Here comes the checkered flag!
1274
01:09:16,210 --> 01:09:18,250
Stop it!
1275
01:09:18,330 --> 01:09:20,080
There's only one número uno, son.
1276
01:09:20,290 --> 01:09:21,790
l'm not número dos!
1277
01:09:21,880 --> 01:09:22,880
Toe-to-toe!
1278
01:09:58,500 --> 01:09:59,710
l won!
1279
01:10:04,210 --> 01:10:05,960
He wasted Margaritaville.
1280
01:10:06,050 --> 01:10:07,550
He won!
1281
01:10:10,300 --> 01:10:11,970
Yeah!
1282
01:10:16,970 --> 01:10:19,020
Your daddy's such a good dancer.
1283
01:10:24,900 --> 01:10:26,020
Hello?
1284
01:10:26,820 --> 01:10:28,860
-Hello.
-Oh, my God!
1285
01:10:28,940 --> 01:10:31,240
What are you doing here?
You're supposed to be on the show!
1286
01:10:31,280 --> 01:10:33,200
-Megan and l got kicked off.
-Oh, my God.
1287
01:10:35,620 --> 01:10:36,780
Watch this. Watch this.
1288
01:10:38,660 --> 01:10:41,160
Oh, God! Oh, my God!
1289
01:10:41,710 --> 01:10:43,370
You threw your samba for me.
1290
01:10:43,460 --> 01:10:46,380
The judges called it a "national disaster."
1291
01:10:46,460 --> 01:10:49,130
l don't want anyone else
taking care of you.
1292
01:10:49,170 --> 01:10:50,510
That's my job.
1293
01:10:53,510 --> 01:10:56,640
Okay, look. You were right, okay? You win...
1294
01:10:56,720 --> 01:10:59,430
Jules, l don't wanna be right.
l don't wanna win.
1295
01:11:00,810 --> 01:11:04,480
l just want you and our baby safe. Okay?
1296
01:11:06,820 --> 01:11:10,070
That was actually, like,
a national disaster right there.
1297
01:11:13,570 --> 01:11:18,990
Daddy's here.
1298
01:11:20,000 --> 01:11:23,290
l'm gonna give you the one,
but it's not for the right reasons.
1299
01:11:24,000 --> 01:11:25,670
See you tomorrow.
1300
01:11:34,050 --> 01:11:36,010
lf you want me to go, l'll go.
1301
01:11:38,100 --> 01:11:39,140
What happened to your hand?
1302
01:11:39,180 --> 01:11:42,100
Look. l want you to know that l get it.
1303
01:11:42,180 --> 01:11:44,190
l'll probably never really understand
what you went through.
1304
01:11:44,650 --> 01:11:46,850
But l don't want that to be the reason
we're not together.
1305
01:11:47,520 --> 01:11:50,530
You were right,
l never even took you out on a real date.
1306
01:11:51,780 --> 01:11:53,030
But l want to.
1307
01:11:55,990 --> 01:11:57,030
l made these for you.
1308
01:11:57,910 --> 01:11:59,620
Caramels.
1309
01:11:59,700 --> 01:12:01,200
Piece-of-shit double boiler.
1310
01:12:03,910 --> 01:12:05,120
l thought you said never again.
1311
01:12:05,960 --> 01:12:07,790
Well, l made an exception.
1312
01:12:12,670 --> 01:12:14,010
Marco, the reason we're not together
1313
01:12:14,050 --> 01:12:15,970
has nothing to do with the fact
we were gonna have a baby.
1314
01:12:16,050 --> 01:12:17,510
lt wouldn't have worked anyway.
1315
01:12:17,550 --> 01:12:20,810
That's bullshit, Rosie.
Give me one good reason.
1316
01:12:21,390 --> 01:12:23,680
Okay, you don't have a car.
1317
01:12:24,100 --> 01:12:27,230
What? Says the girl
with the duct-taped Civic.
1318
01:12:27,730 --> 01:12:30,190
-Seriously?
-Fine. lt's not the car.
1319
01:12:30,230 --> 01:12:33,110
-You got me.
-Then what, Rosie? What?
1320
01:12:33,190 --> 01:12:35,320
'Cause we were great.
1321
01:12:36,860 --> 01:12:38,950
You know, you have the worst taste in girls.
1322
01:12:39,030 --> 01:12:43,450
You go for the most obvious,
least-interesting chef groupies ever.
1323
01:12:43,540 --> 01:12:45,080
What does that say about me
if that's what you're into?
1324
01:12:45,160 --> 01:12:47,710
Well, they can't all be you, now can they?
1325
01:12:48,540 --> 01:12:50,420
-You wanna know what it is?
-Yeah.
1326
01:12:51,380 --> 01:12:55,420
Every time l look at your face, it kills me.
ls that enough of a reason?
1327
01:12:56,090 --> 01:12:58,470
Can we be done
with this conversation, please?
1328
01:13:00,100 --> 01:13:02,390
Yeah. We can be done.
1329
01:13:02,970 --> 01:13:04,430
Here.
1330
01:13:05,930 --> 01:13:09,520
No. l don't even like caramels.
Just keep them. Take them.
1331
01:13:21,120 --> 01:13:23,490
-Holly, thank you for coming.
-Sure.
1332
01:13:23,620 --> 01:13:25,910
-l can't wait to see this.
-lt's a little big.
1333
01:13:25,950 --> 01:13:28,830
-Well, you know we wanted it big.
-l know.
1334
01:13:30,130 --> 01:13:31,790
All right, let's see it.
1335
01:13:31,840 --> 01:13:35,050
You might wanna wait
till you get home to open it, l think.
1336
01:13:35,300 --> 01:13:36,630
No, l wanna see it right here.
1337
01:13:37,670 --> 01:13:38,970
Okay.
1338
01:13:40,840 --> 01:13:43,470
l did it exactly how you want.
1339
01:13:46,930 --> 01:13:48,640
l love it! l love it!
1340
01:13:48,690 --> 01:13:51,060
-You do? Good.
-l love it!
1341
01:13:52,310 --> 01:13:53,610
Holly!
1342
01:13:54,320 --> 01:13:55,980
And when you come back from Africa
1343
01:13:56,070 --> 01:13:59,280
l'm gonna get you to take a picture of
these twins, and my stepson's baby.
1344
01:13:59,320 --> 01:14:01,570
l mean,
you are gonna be our family photographer!
1345
01:14:02,700 --> 01:14:03,950
Hey!
1346
01:14:04,490 --> 01:14:05,870
l felt a kick in there!
1347
01:14:07,370 --> 01:14:09,660
l'm gonna cover this up for you.
1348
01:14:10,370 --> 01:14:11,460
Do you wanna feel?
1349
01:14:16,210 --> 01:14:17,260
Sure.
1350
01:14:18,130 --> 01:14:20,340
lt's two in there, yeah?
1351
01:14:27,020 --> 01:14:29,140
-Do you feel that?
-Yeah.
1352
01:14:33,360 --> 01:14:35,310
lt really is a miracle, isn't it?
1353
01:15:09,020 --> 01:15:12,020
-Wendy! There you are!
-Hi, here l am.
1354
01:15:12,060 --> 01:15:16,480
And looking so fantastic!
We are so glad you agreed to speak.
1355
01:15:16,570 --> 01:15:20,190
Hello, there! Aren't you just loving it?
1356
01:15:20,280 --> 01:15:22,900
Experiencing everything for yourself?
1357
01:15:22,990 --> 01:15:25,910
You must be ecstatic,
every second of every day.
1358
01:15:25,950 --> 01:15:29,160
Every day, every second, totally ecstatic.
1359
01:15:32,500 --> 01:15:33,580
Hey, Wendy.
1360
01:15:34,290 --> 01:15:37,880
We have to get some of these for the store.
lt tastes like real nipple.
1361
01:15:37,920 --> 01:15:40,000
Janice, l don't think l can do this.
1362
01:15:40,090 --> 01:15:43,420
l mean, l can't go out there
and just act like everything's peachy.
1363
01:15:43,550 --> 01:15:45,090
l really feel like crap.
1364
01:15:45,390 --> 01:15:46,800
lt's so hot.
1365
01:15:47,050 --> 01:15:49,560
You can do it.
Just put one cankle in front of the other.
1366
01:15:50,140 --> 01:15:53,140
Get out there and tell the truth
and share your wisdom.
1367
01:15:53,390 --> 01:15:56,270
Janice, l just peed myself.
1368
01:15:56,440 --> 01:15:58,310
-That's natural.
-No, Janice.
1369
01:16:00,440 --> 01:16:02,280
Like a lot.
1370
01:16:02,780 --> 01:16:06,110
And now, please welcome
our keynote speaker,
1371
01:16:06,160 --> 01:16:08,950
Wendy Cooper of The Breast Choice!
1372
01:16:18,380 --> 01:16:20,590
Hi. That's me, here?
1373
01:16:20,630 --> 01:16:22,380
Okay.
1374
01:16:22,460 --> 01:16:24,050
l sit here. Okay.
1375
01:16:27,640 --> 01:16:28,720
Janice?
1376
01:16:28,800 --> 01:16:31,140
-Janice? Sweetie?
-What?
1377
01:16:31,310 --> 01:16:33,100
Get my speech. Get my speech.
1378
01:16:33,350 --> 01:16:35,390
-ln my pocket!
-What?
1379
01:16:36,770 --> 01:16:38,310
Sorry.
1380
01:16:41,280 --> 01:16:42,820
-Okay.
-My God.
1381
01:16:43,490 --> 01:16:44,610
-Okay.
-Hi there.
1382
01:16:44,650 --> 01:16:47,200
What's this liquid on my butt?
1383
01:16:47,820 --> 01:16:49,700
No. Don't. Okay, thank you.
1384
01:16:49,780 --> 01:16:51,330
Maybe l just
1385
01:16:52,370 --> 01:16:55,750
-peed myself 'cause l'm pregnant.
-No. No.
1386
01:16:56,250 --> 01:16:57,290
-No.
-Yeah.
1387
01:16:57,330 --> 01:17:01,290
And that's why l go to The Breast Choice
for all my pregnancy needs.
1388
01:17:01,630 --> 01:17:03,050
Thank you, Janice.
1389
01:17:03,130 --> 01:17:04,510
Okay.
1390
01:17:05,050 --> 01:17:06,670
-Over to Wendy.
-Yep.
1391
01:17:06,880 --> 01:17:09,220
-Tell them about your glow.
-Thank you, Janice.
1392
01:17:11,680 --> 01:17:15,980
The magical, happy miracle,
experiencing pregnancy.
1393
01:17:18,810 --> 01:17:23,400
Pregnancy's glow is made
from two scoops of angel kisses.
1394
01:17:24,690 --> 01:17:29,160
lt begins when you feel the first...
1395
01:17:31,490 --> 01:17:33,080
Sorry.
1396
01:17:33,990 --> 01:17:36,370
Hormones! Right?
1397
01:17:38,500 --> 01:17:41,580
l just find myself crying all the time.
1398
01:17:45,010 --> 01:17:47,050
Okay, you know what? The truth...
1399
01:17:48,260 --> 01:17:49,720
The truth is...
1400
01:17:52,010 --> 01:17:55,390
l can't think with this thing on.
l'm sorry. l am so uncomfortable.
1401
01:17:55,560 --> 01:17:59,270
l don't even recognize my body anymore,
you know?
1402
01:17:59,350 --> 01:18:02,190
lt's like l could fit 20 of my old bras
1403
01:18:02,230 --> 01:18:06,070
into this one giant piece
of Granny spandex that's just...
1404
01:18:08,240 --> 01:18:09,570
Okay.
1405
01:18:09,660 --> 01:18:11,030
Thank you.
1406
01:18:11,070 --> 01:18:13,490
-Should we all take off our bras?
-l think we're good.
1407
01:18:13,580 --> 01:18:16,160
-lt's a bit small.
-No. Please don't.
1408
01:18:16,580 --> 01:18:19,210
l'm sorry.
l didn't think about any of this stuff
1409
01:18:19,410 --> 01:18:22,750
before l got pregnant.
1410
01:18:24,590 --> 01:18:26,170
l just wanted the glow.
1411
01:18:27,800 --> 01:18:32,590
The one they promise you on the cover
of those magazines, with the pretty lady
1412
01:18:33,800 --> 01:18:38,270
looking down at her perfectly round belly
with that sweet smile.
1413
01:18:40,730 --> 01:18:42,810
Well, l'm calling it.
1414
01:18:44,480 --> 01:18:45,860
l'm calling bullshit.
1415
01:18:47,070 --> 01:18:50,950
l'm calling bullshit on the whole thing.
Pregnancy sucks.
1416
01:18:50,990 --> 01:18:54,280
Making a human being is really hard.
1417
01:18:54,320 --> 01:18:57,120
l have no control over my body
or my emotions.
1418
01:18:57,160 --> 01:18:58,790
Gar Bear. l'm sorry.
1419
01:18:59,080 --> 01:19:01,460
All l wanna do is punch you in the face
1420
01:19:01,500 --> 01:19:03,370
but l love you so much so l don't mean it.
1421
01:19:03,460 --> 01:19:06,460
l love you too, Squeaks. You're doing great.
1422
01:19:07,130 --> 01:19:10,970
l don't know about you
but l didn't get the glow. l got bacne
1423
01:19:11,470 --> 01:19:15,260
and hemorrhoids.
Have you ever seen those?
1424
01:19:15,300 --> 01:19:17,010
Don't do it. Don't take the mirror down there.
1425
01:19:17,510 --> 01:19:21,310
And then l have these
purple stretch marks everywhere.
1426
01:19:21,850 --> 01:19:25,020
And pressure hanging from my uterus
1427
01:19:25,110 --> 01:19:28,440
that makes me walk like
l was kicked in the vag. l just...
1428
01:19:29,940 --> 01:19:32,610
Okay. Maybe it's time to stop there.
1429
01:19:33,160 --> 01:19:34,860
-Too far.
-That's the end.
1430
01:19:34,950 --> 01:19:37,030
l couldn't think of another way
to describe it.
1431
01:19:37,280 --> 01:19:38,830
That was really good.
1432
01:19:39,620 --> 01:19:40,950
-So...
-There we go.
1433
01:19:41,330 --> 01:19:42,660
Thank you.
1434
01:19:44,830 --> 01:19:47,670
They say when it's all over
1435
01:19:48,840 --> 01:19:50,670
you forget the whole thing.
1436
01:19:51,840 --> 01:19:53,840
l, for one, really hope that's true.
1437
01:19:56,850 --> 01:20:00,470
Like that. l really hope l forget that.
1438
01:20:00,520 --> 01:20:02,810
Wendy Cooper, everybody.
1439
01:20:05,400 --> 01:20:06,770
...hanging from my uterus
1440
01:20:06,860 --> 01:20:09,820
that makes me walk like
I was kicked in the...
1441
01:20:09,860 --> 01:20:12,320
No. l don't think you went too far at all.
1442
01:20:12,360 --> 01:20:14,610
Seriously. No one's even gonna see this.
1443
01:20:14,860 --> 01:20:16,700
This is gonna ruin my business.
1444
01:20:16,990 --> 01:20:19,580
This is all gonna blow over.
1445
01:20:19,830 --> 01:20:23,410
lt's not a big deal at all for sure.
1446
01:20:24,500 --> 01:20:26,000
Oh, God.
1447
01:20:26,670 --> 01:20:28,710
Gar. No.
1448
01:20:28,880 --> 01:20:31,960
lt's a mob. lt's a mob, Gar.
Look at them, they look angry.
1449
01:20:32,050 --> 01:20:34,090
-Hold your head high.
-l can't.
1450
01:20:34,380 --> 01:20:36,050
Just prop it on your boobs then.
1451
01:20:37,140 --> 01:20:38,970
Oh, no. l'm gonna have to go into hiding.
1452
01:20:40,430 --> 01:20:41,510
Janice.
1453
01:20:42,140 --> 01:20:43,890
-Oh, my gosh.
-Wendy.
1454
01:20:43,980 --> 01:20:47,020
Look, you got more hits
than that cow dancing video.
1455
01:20:47,100 --> 01:20:48,440
Two million!
1456
01:20:48,730 --> 01:20:50,310
Hormones, hormones
1457
01:20:50,400 --> 01:20:51,980
Punch you in the face
punch you in the face
1458
01:20:52,070 --> 01:20:53,650
All l want to do is punch you in the face
1459
01:20:53,740 --> 01:20:55,030
l just got bacne
1460
01:20:55,110 --> 01:20:56,990
Calling bullshit on the whole thing
1461
01:20:57,070 --> 01:20:58,160
Pregnancy sucks
1462
01:21:00,200 --> 01:21:01,910
All right, okay.
1463
01:21:01,990 --> 01:21:05,120
l'm coming. Just hold on to your va-jay-jays!
1464
01:21:05,250 --> 01:21:06,580
lt's pretty good.
1465
01:21:06,620 --> 01:21:07,830
Yeah, Wendy is here.
1466
01:21:08,330 --> 01:21:12,040
Welcome to the workplace of Wendy Cooper,
the star of lnternet.
1467
01:21:12,630 --> 01:21:14,340
-Wow, nice to meet you.
-Nice to meet you.
1468
01:21:14,630 --> 01:21:16,800
We're definitely gonna need
more nipple cream.
1469
01:21:20,890 --> 01:21:22,430
Wendy touched this.
1470
01:21:24,270 --> 01:21:25,600
Forty dollars.
1471
01:21:27,190 --> 01:21:28,390
All right, thank you.
1472
01:21:54,550 --> 01:21:55,920
Alex, Holly!
1473
01:21:55,960 --> 01:21:57,970
-Yes.
-Right this way.
1474
01:21:58,760 --> 01:22:00,220
Welcome to Ethiopia.
1475
01:22:00,470 --> 01:22:01,800
Thank you. Thank you so much.
1476
01:22:01,890 --> 01:22:03,800
-Are you excited?
-We're so excited.
1477
01:22:04,220 --> 01:22:06,180
Good, good. ls this your first time?
1478
01:22:06,270 --> 01:22:07,600
Yes. Yours?
1479
01:22:07,640 --> 01:22:08,730
Fifth.
1480
01:22:08,940 --> 01:22:09,980
Awesome.
1481
01:22:10,020 --> 01:22:13,650
All right then. Everybody gather up
your things, here we go. Follow me.
1482
01:22:14,020 --> 01:22:15,190
Right this way.
1483
01:22:15,650 --> 01:22:19,320
l will rip this baby out myself.
l swear to God, you'll see me on the news.
1484
01:22:19,400 --> 01:22:22,240
You want this baby on time?
Try walking. That helps sometimes.
1485
01:22:22,320 --> 01:22:23,660
Walking.
1486
01:22:25,040 --> 01:22:29,870
And amazingly, even Kara is calling him
Henry now. So l owe Alex big-time.
1487
01:22:30,370 --> 01:22:32,960
l hear you, l respect you,
1488
01:22:33,000 --> 01:22:35,420
-and l will take it under consideration.
-Thank you.
1489
01:22:35,670 --> 01:22:37,050
You're very welcome.
1490
01:22:37,880 --> 01:22:39,380
Look who we've got here.
1491
01:22:39,670 --> 01:22:41,340
Trying to get that labor started, huh?
1492
01:22:41,550 --> 01:22:42,840
You have no idea.
1493
01:22:42,930 --> 01:22:45,140
Try having sex. That's the really fun part.
1494
01:22:45,180 --> 01:22:48,060
We're here every Saturday, bro.
Tweak the nipples.
1495
01:22:48,350 --> 01:22:50,020
-Okay. Sounds good.
-Guys, look!
1496
01:22:50,520 --> 01:22:54,310
Davis! Davis!
1497
01:22:54,360 --> 01:22:55,770
Hey, wait! l got it. l got it.
1498
01:22:55,860 --> 01:22:57,110
-Vic, we've got to talk.
-What's up?
1499
01:22:57,360 --> 01:22:59,030
Hey, no pull-ups, man?
Are you sick or something?
1500
01:22:59,110 --> 01:23:00,360
What's wrong, D-Bone?
You always do your pull-ups.
1501
01:23:00,570 --> 01:23:01,860
Remember the girl from Australia?
1502
01:23:01,950 --> 01:23:05,490
l remember her well.
Excellent photos, Davis. Slutty, but artful.
1503
01:23:05,530 --> 01:23:06,700
Yeah, well...
1504
01:23:06,910 --> 01:23:09,450
Whoa! What is that?
1505
01:23:09,700 --> 01:23:11,250
ls that... ls she yours?
1506
01:23:11,790 --> 01:23:13,040
Yeah.
1507
01:23:13,120 --> 01:23:15,750
Her name's Ruby and they're moving here.
1508
01:23:15,840 --> 01:23:16,880
Vic, you've got to help me, man.
1509
01:23:16,960 --> 01:23:18,420
l don't know the first thing about
being a dad.
1510
01:23:18,710 --> 01:23:21,220
Fellows, say hello to our newest member.
1511
01:23:22,220 --> 01:23:23,720
-Yes!
-Let's walk, Davis.
1512
01:23:25,050 --> 01:23:28,220
l don't walk. l run.
1513
01:23:28,520 --> 01:23:31,350
Not anymore, bro. Not anymore.
1514
01:23:31,390 --> 01:23:33,230
Jordan! Get out of those bushes!
1515
01:23:37,230 --> 01:23:40,530
Davis, we are very,
very psyched to have you.
1516
01:23:40,570 --> 01:23:41,990
So psyched! Bam!
1517
01:23:42,070 --> 01:23:43,320
Don't ever touch me again.
1518
01:23:43,410 --> 01:23:45,740
Craig, stop creeping Davis out.
1519
01:24:01,720 --> 01:24:03,340
Sure you got everything ready?
1520
01:24:03,800 --> 01:24:05,300
Yes.
1521
01:24:15,600 --> 01:24:17,190
What are you doing?
1522
01:24:17,270 --> 01:24:19,940
l'm just making sure, that's all.
1523
01:24:26,320 --> 01:24:29,240
l'm just... Don't, okay?
l'm just trying to get ready.
1524
01:24:29,280 --> 01:24:31,450
l know. So am l.
1525
01:24:35,460 --> 01:24:37,880
lt's not that l'm not ready. l'm just...
1526
01:24:40,130 --> 01:24:41,590
l'm scared.
1527
01:24:46,180 --> 01:24:49,640
l know, honey.
1528
01:24:49,720 --> 01:24:51,430
l'm scared, too.
1529
01:24:52,600 --> 01:24:54,140
l don't know what the hell l'm doing.
1530
01:24:57,310 --> 01:25:00,940
But we can be scared together.
We just have to jump in. All in.
1531
01:25:01,020 --> 01:25:02,860
l know. l'm getting there.
1532
01:25:03,320 --> 01:25:04,900
Okay? And...
1533
01:25:07,820 --> 01:25:09,950
And l know l'm gonna love him.
1534
01:25:10,990 --> 01:25:13,120
Because l love the hell out of his mom.
1535
01:25:21,210 --> 01:25:23,130
Let's go meet our son.
1536
01:25:25,510 --> 01:25:27,010
Okay.
1537
01:25:32,680 --> 01:25:36,350
Welcome back to our live
Lose it and Weep finale.
1538
01:25:36,430 --> 01:25:38,850
We're just moments away
from finding out who our big,
1539
01:25:38,940 --> 01:25:41,980
or shall l say "small" winner is.
1540
01:25:44,360 --> 01:25:45,860
Oh, my God. l'm already crying.
1541
01:25:46,320 --> 01:25:47,530
They look amazing.
1542
01:25:47,860 --> 01:25:49,360
l'd totally let that one do me.
1543
01:25:49,410 --> 01:25:51,160
Now, before we get down to business,
1544
01:25:51,200 --> 01:25:53,530
we have a little surprise for you guys.
Take a look.
1545
01:25:54,580 --> 01:25:55,700
Hey, guys.
1546
01:25:55,750 --> 01:25:57,330
Hi, Jules!
1547
01:25:57,620 --> 01:25:58,830
l'm sorry l can't be there.
1548
01:25:58,920 --> 01:26:01,790
l just want to congratulate you all
on working so hard.
1549
01:26:02,380 --> 01:26:04,040
And forget about what
the scale says tonight.
1550
01:26:04,130 --> 01:26:05,750
You're all winners.
1551
01:26:08,550 --> 01:26:10,260
Son-of-a-bitch!
1552
01:26:11,720 --> 01:26:13,220
Jules, we're live.
1553
01:26:14,560 --> 01:26:15,720
Fuck!
1554
01:26:17,680 --> 01:26:18,810
Still live.
1555
01:26:18,890 --> 01:26:20,310
The censors are gonna love that.
1556
01:26:20,940 --> 01:26:23,560
Hey, that reminds me.
How you doing there, Tater Tot?
1557
01:26:25,110 --> 01:26:27,360
Contractions about 1 7 minutes apart,
Ram Bam.
1558
01:26:27,400 --> 01:26:28,940
Because we can leave any time.
1559
01:26:29,030 --> 01:26:32,200
l'm just trying to catch the part with Gary,
but l can always record it.
1560
01:26:32,240 --> 01:26:34,070
No, baby! lt's fine. l can wait.
1561
01:26:34,120 --> 01:26:35,410
Okay, then.
1562
01:26:36,040 --> 01:26:37,410
Gary, come on!
1563
01:26:37,500 --> 01:26:40,580
Yes, yes. l just cannot find my keys.
That's all l have to do.
1564
01:26:40,920 --> 01:26:42,580
Hey! Look at this. l've got them.
1565
01:26:42,630 --> 01:26:44,590
Honey, do you have your driver's license?
1566
01:26:44,920 --> 01:26:46,840
-Because l don't have my driver's license.
-Gar!
1567
01:26:47,050 --> 01:26:49,720
Calm the ef down and get the effing car.
1568
01:26:54,680 --> 01:26:57,260
Shitballs, man! Slow down!
1569
01:26:57,640 --> 01:26:59,890
-Sweetie, l just hate to see you like this...
-Red light!
1570
01:27:00,350 --> 01:27:01,690
Big Pig!
1571
01:27:05,440 --> 01:27:09,230
Jesus, Gar! Keep your eyes on the road,
you worthless piece of shit!
1572
01:27:09,280 --> 01:27:11,030
Sorry, baby, l love you.
You know l do, right?
1573
01:27:11,490 --> 01:27:13,070
l love you, too.
1574
01:27:14,490 --> 01:27:16,950
-Watch the tail.
-l'm watching the tail!
1575
01:27:18,160 --> 01:27:19,660
Oh, my God!
1576
01:27:20,210 --> 01:27:22,080
-My foot! My foot!
-Are you okay? ls it broken?
1577
01:27:22,920 --> 01:27:23,960
Don't be such a baby.
1578
01:27:24,130 --> 01:27:25,420
Just pull into any of these spots.
1579
01:27:25,460 --> 01:27:28,130
-Right here. Any of these spots.
-Which one?
1580
01:27:28,170 --> 01:27:29,210
Good. Perfect.
1581
01:27:32,010 --> 01:27:33,050
Don't touch!
1582
01:27:33,840 --> 01:27:36,680
Whoa! The floor's a little wet.
They've got to do something about that.
1583
01:27:36,890 --> 01:27:38,310
That's my water, you idiot.
1584
01:27:39,270 --> 01:27:40,560
You're doing great, hon.
1585
01:27:42,310 --> 01:27:44,560
Man! Why did you do that?
1586
01:27:45,440 --> 01:27:49,190
Stop! Here comes another one.
Here comes another one.
1587
01:27:51,570 --> 01:27:54,150
Where's the valet?
l don't see a valet around here.
1588
01:27:57,780 --> 01:28:00,410
-Wow. Are we moving?
-Yes.
1589
01:28:00,750 --> 01:28:02,750
-Babe, did you press the button?
-Yes.
1590
01:28:06,920 --> 01:28:08,250
You're doing great.
1591
01:28:08,630 --> 01:28:10,380
Baby, watch out, the floor's wet.
1592
01:28:11,590 --> 01:28:13,300
What the hell is that?
1593
01:28:15,760 --> 01:28:16,800
We're here, Jules.
1594
01:28:16,890 --> 01:28:19,720
l don't care about his penis.
Who gives a shit?
1595
01:28:20,310 --> 01:28:22,310
We're having a baby!
1596
01:28:22,890 --> 01:28:24,600
-Okay, okay, good.
-The Baby Center.
1597
01:28:24,690 --> 01:28:25,810
The Baby Center. So we're in the right place.
1598
01:28:25,850 --> 01:28:26,850
-Hi.
-Hi.
1599
01:28:26,940 --> 01:28:27,940
-We're the Coopers.
-Hi.
1600
01:28:28,020 --> 01:28:29,020
-We pre-registered.
-Yeah.
1601
01:28:29,070 --> 01:28:30,110
Okay. Got you.
1602
01:28:30,190 --> 01:28:32,320
-l've got my birth plan!
-Aren't you organized.
1603
01:28:33,070 --> 01:28:34,110
Skyler Cooper.
1604
01:28:34,320 --> 01:28:36,660
-Another Cooper?
-We reserved a deluxe suite.
1605
01:28:36,860 --> 01:28:37,910
And this is your father?
1606
01:28:38,120 --> 01:28:39,620
He's my husband.
1607
01:28:39,830 --> 01:28:42,040
Sorry. Husband. Great.
1608
01:28:42,250 --> 01:28:43,370
We're having a baby.
1609
01:28:43,620 --> 01:28:44,870
l know you.
1610
01:28:45,370 --> 01:28:46,370
l can do it!
1611
01:28:46,420 --> 01:28:49,540
That's it. With your help,
l've lost eight pounds.
1612
01:28:49,920 --> 01:28:51,380
Can you help me do the same?
1613
01:28:51,800 --> 01:28:53,710
Do you happen to have
a room service menu?
1614
01:28:53,800 --> 01:28:55,840
On a scale of 1 to 1 0,
how is your pain right now?
1615
01:28:56,800 --> 01:28:57,800
Two.
1616
01:28:57,890 --> 01:28:59,510
All right. Tough girl.
1617
01:29:00,310 --> 01:29:01,350
Maybe a three.
1618
01:29:02,390 --> 01:29:04,680
Was that a contraction? l barely even felt it.
1619
01:29:04,890 --> 01:29:07,940
Sure was. What's your pain level,
on a scale of 1 to 1 0?
1620
01:29:09,150 --> 01:29:12,070
Like a zero to a one.
Because l'm smiling, we're smiling.
1621
01:29:12,280 --> 01:29:14,190
You're number one, baby.
1622
01:29:15,190 --> 01:29:16,740
Okay, who wants to have a baby?
1623
01:29:16,820 --> 01:29:18,410
Where the hell have you been?
1624
01:29:18,450 --> 01:29:21,240
Okay, let's talk pain.
On a scale of 1 to 1 0, what do you feel?
1625
01:29:22,580 --> 01:29:23,910
What are you, l think, maybe a six?
1626
01:29:24,000 --> 01:29:26,710
What? l'm an eight! Frown, no tears. Eight.
1627
01:29:26,750 --> 01:29:27,960
Are you getting an epidural?
1628
01:29:28,040 --> 01:29:30,170
Do l look like somebody
who wants to drug my baby?
1629
01:29:30,250 --> 01:29:31,590
Are y'all planning an epidural?
1630
01:29:31,920 --> 01:29:34,420
-l don't know. l guess we'll see how it goes.
-Whatever.
1631
01:29:34,550 --> 01:29:35,880
So do you want an epidural?
1632
01:29:35,920 --> 01:29:37,880
Hell, no. Let's do this.
1633
01:29:38,090 --> 01:29:39,090
That's right.
1634
01:29:40,050 --> 01:29:41,720
-Here comes another one.
-Okay, breathe.
1635
01:29:53,860 --> 01:29:55,780
-Gar?
-Yeah?
1636
01:29:56,440 --> 01:29:59,570
l changed my mind. l want the epidural.
l want it, Gary.
1637
01:29:59,610 --> 01:30:01,660
No, no, honey. No, no, no.
You said you didn't want it
1638
01:30:01,740 --> 01:30:05,240
and you said that even if you did ask for it,
that would just be the crazy talking...
1639
01:30:05,290 --> 01:30:07,790
Gary! Get me the juice!
1640
01:30:07,830 --> 01:30:10,330
That seemed a little crazy.
l will get you the juice.
1641
01:30:10,420 --> 01:30:11,790
l need it, Gar.
1642
01:30:11,880 --> 01:30:14,460
l'm sorry, baby.
Just don't come back without it, okay?
1643
01:30:14,500 --> 01:30:15,750
-No anchovies on that, right?
-Hey, Dad!
1644
01:30:15,800 --> 01:30:18,260
Hey, son! Hey, you, too?
1645
01:30:18,300 --> 01:30:19,670
lt's not a race, Dad.
1646
01:30:20,430 --> 01:30:21,640
That's my son.
1647
01:30:21,680 --> 01:30:23,300
Hey! Are you the anesthesiologist?
1648
01:30:23,470 --> 01:30:24,470
-Yes, sir.
-Okay.
1649
01:30:24,560 --> 01:30:26,310
My wife changed her mind.
She needs the epidural right now.
1650
01:30:26,390 --> 01:30:28,480
l've got five women in front of her.
lt's gonna be a little while.
1651
01:30:28,560 --> 01:30:29,980
No, no, no, no. That's not okay.
She's in pain.
1652
01:30:30,060 --> 01:30:31,140
Everybody's in pain.
1653
01:30:31,190 --> 01:30:34,190
Okay, hold on. Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
1654
01:30:34,270 --> 01:30:35,770
-Wait, wait! Wait!
-Really?
1655
01:30:37,690 --> 01:30:38,860
-Dad! Dad!
-Yeah?
1656
01:30:38,950 --> 01:30:40,450
l need your money roll.
l need your money roll.
1657
01:30:40,490 --> 01:30:42,320
Sure. How much you need?
1658
01:30:42,370 --> 01:30:44,320
Yeah. Okay.
1659
01:30:46,660 --> 01:30:48,290
The crazy lady in 408 is next.
1660
01:30:48,500 --> 01:30:49,830
She most certainly is, sir.
1661
01:30:50,120 --> 01:30:54,790
You're gonna feel a little bit of pressure
in one or both legs. That's normal.
1662
01:30:55,130 --> 01:30:57,050
You are so clutch, baby.
1663
01:30:57,630 --> 01:30:59,130
So clutch.
1664
01:30:59,800 --> 01:31:01,720
You're at eight centimeters.
1665
01:31:02,680 --> 01:31:04,680
-Two more! l can push!
-Two more.
1666
01:31:05,050 --> 01:31:06,470
Nine centimeters.
1667
01:31:06,510 --> 01:31:07,640
Great!
1668
01:31:07,680 --> 01:31:09,140
What is that in inches?
1669
01:31:10,140 --> 01:31:12,390
You're at ten centimeters,
but the baby's not coming.
1670
01:31:12,650 --> 01:31:14,860
We need to prepare for a C-Section.
1671
01:31:14,900 --> 01:31:16,940
No, no, no, no. l have a birth plan.
1672
01:31:17,020 --> 01:31:18,020
Yeah, we...
1673
01:31:18,110 --> 01:31:19,440
l want to push. l want to push.
1674
01:31:19,650 --> 01:31:22,530
l know, Wendy, but the baby's heart rate
is falling. We need to move now.
1675
01:31:22,740 --> 01:31:23,780
lt's going to be okay.
1676
01:31:24,160 --> 01:31:28,030
But l typed it. lt's typed.
The birth plan, it's ready to go.
1677
01:31:28,120 --> 01:31:30,910
l'm ready to push. l wanna push.
Please, l wanna push.
1678
01:31:31,500 --> 01:31:32,540
Please?
1679
01:31:33,500 --> 01:31:35,880
So, Jules, you've been doing well.
Let's take a look, all right?
1680
01:31:37,630 --> 01:31:39,500
Okay. Let's do this.
1681
01:31:39,880 --> 01:31:40,960
Push.
1682
01:31:42,430 --> 01:31:43,630
Here we go.
1683
01:31:43,890 --> 01:31:45,470
-Let's do it.
-Say "l can do it."
1684
01:31:45,550 --> 01:31:46,600
-Push.
-l can do it.
1685
01:31:46,680 --> 01:31:47,720
Say "l can do it."
1686
01:31:47,760 --> 01:31:49,180
-l can do it!
-Come on, Jules. Yeah!
1687
01:31:49,220 --> 01:31:52,430
l can do... No, l can't do this!
1688
01:31:55,480 --> 01:31:56,610
Okay, Skyler.
1689
01:31:57,060 --> 01:31:59,770
You're doing great, Tater Tot.
Just hang in there.
1690
01:31:59,860 --> 01:32:03,400
Bear down and give it all you've got.
Ready?
1691
01:32:03,780 --> 01:32:05,530
Okay, hang on. l have to sneeze.
1692
01:32:10,500 --> 01:32:12,160
Wow. That's one baby out.
1693
01:32:12,250 --> 01:32:14,210
One down, one to go.
1694
01:32:22,340 --> 01:32:23,670
You did this to me!
1695
01:32:24,720 --> 01:32:27,390
That pig is wearing flippers.
1696
01:32:31,020 --> 01:32:32,100
Clamps.
1697
01:32:33,270 --> 01:32:35,100
l love morphine.
1698
01:32:36,690 --> 01:32:38,810
Don't you love morphine, Gar?
1699
01:32:39,020 --> 01:32:40,070
Yeah.
1700
01:32:40,360 --> 01:32:42,610
We should get some for the house.
1701
01:32:43,280 --> 01:32:44,400
Okay.
1702
01:32:44,950 --> 01:32:46,950
That's good. That's good. Almost there.
1703
01:32:47,370 --> 01:32:50,490
You're doing great, Squeaks.
This guy's got a real steady hand.
1704
01:32:52,120 --> 01:32:53,290
-You're fine.
-Yeah.
1705
01:32:58,040 --> 01:32:59,080
Here he is.
1706
01:33:05,680 --> 01:33:06,880
Congratulations.
1707
01:33:07,590 --> 01:33:09,430
Congratulations, Daddy.
1708
01:33:12,470 --> 01:33:13,930
Okay, Jules. This is it. Are you ready?
1709
01:33:14,270 --> 01:33:17,270
All right. l need you to bear down and push.
All right? Here we go.
1710
01:33:17,310 --> 01:33:18,690
-Okay.
-Push! Push! Push!
1711
01:33:18,770 --> 01:33:20,110
Come on, Jules. You can do it.
1712
01:33:20,310 --> 01:33:22,440
All right. All right.
1713
01:33:22,480 --> 01:33:23,730
l see his head, Jules.
1714
01:33:24,940 --> 01:33:26,440
-Give me one more giant push, all right?
-He's beautiful.
1715
01:33:26,530 --> 01:33:28,950
l need the shoulders out. And push!
1716
01:33:32,290 --> 01:33:33,620
That's good. That's good.
1717
01:33:36,040 --> 01:33:37,040
All right.
1718
01:33:37,580 --> 01:33:40,080
And it's a girl!
1719
01:33:42,630 --> 01:33:43,840
lt's a girl!
1720
01:33:47,800 --> 01:33:49,720
-A girl's good. l like girls.
-lt's a girl.
1721
01:33:53,810 --> 01:33:56,060
There she is. Hi.
1722
01:34:01,360 --> 01:34:04,190
Hi, baby girl.
1723
01:34:05,110 --> 01:34:07,990
Hello, Emerson. l'm your mommy.
1724
01:34:09,280 --> 01:34:10,610
Emerson is cute, right?
1725
01:34:10,820 --> 01:34:12,320
Emerson. l love it.
1726
01:34:19,960 --> 01:34:21,710
Jules, l knew you could do it.
1727
01:34:23,630 --> 01:34:24,960
Thank you.
1728
01:34:25,960 --> 01:34:27,010
Hi.
1729
01:34:29,340 --> 01:34:31,260
Hi, sweetheart.
1730
01:34:34,180 --> 01:34:38,770
Squeaks, say hi to little Theo.
1731
01:34:40,480 --> 01:34:43,440
Say hi to Mama. Can you say hi to Mama?
1732
01:34:44,360 --> 01:34:47,940
Say hi to Mama. Yeah, that's Mama's finger.
1733
01:34:49,400 --> 01:34:51,070
-Wendy? Hey, guys.
-We need more suction here.
1734
01:34:51,110 --> 01:34:52,110
We're getting some high blood pressure.
1735
01:34:52,200 --> 01:34:53,240
ls she supposed to be falling asleep?
1736
01:34:53,280 --> 01:34:54,280
Wendy?
1737
01:34:54,370 --> 01:34:55,870
-A lot of bleeding here.
-Hey! What is going on?
1738
01:34:55,910 --> 01:34:58,450
Okay, Mr. Cooper.
Mr. Cooper, l think you need to step out.
1739
01:34:58,540 --> 01:35:00,870
We have everything under control in here.
lt's okay. Come with me.
1740
01:35:00,920 --> 01:35:03,630
Wendy, are you gonna be all right? Wendy?
1741
01:35:10,630 --> 01:35:11,760
Hey.
1742
01:35:11,970 --> 01:35:13,590
-Hey.
-You've got doctor clothes on.
1743
01:35:13,680 --> 01:35:14,760
Yeah.
1744
01:35:15,970 --> 01:35:17,220
Everything okay?
1745
01:35:17,430 --> 01:35:18,770
We have a son.
1746
01:35:19,390 --> 01:35:21,270
But Wendy lost a lot of blood in there
1747
01:35:21,310 --> 01:35:23,270
so they made me wait out here.
1748
01:35:23,350 --> 01:35:26,150
So l don't know what's going on inside.
1749
01:35:26,230 --> 01:35:28,940
'Cause they made me wait out here.
1750
01:35:29,860 --> 01:35:31,190
lt's gonna be okay.
1751
01:35:32,240 --> 01:35:34,610
l'm here for you. All right?
1752
01:35:34,700 --> 01:35:36,120
Thanks, Dad.
1753
01:35:48,090 --> 01:35:49,090
Here they come.
1754
01:36:12,570 --> 01:36:17,530
l promise to watch over this child.
1755
01:36:20,290 --> 01:36:26,580
And to bring him up proud and strong.
1756
01:36:34,090 --> 01:36:43,140
And as one who will always remember
his Ethiopian heritage.
1757
01:36:45,060 --> 01:36:48,150
So help me God.
1758
01:36:48,360 --> 01:36:49,690
Amen.
1759
01:36:54,070 --> 01:36:55,530
Hi.
1760
01:36:56,240 --> 01:36:59,370
There we go, there we are.
1761
01:37:00,700 --> 01:37:03,700
l've been waiting for you!
1762
01:37:03,790 --> 01:37:06,040
Congratulations. You are parents.
1763
01:37:42,330 --> 01:37:44,540
Mr. Cooper? She's awake.
1764
01:37:50,420 --> 01:37:53,040
Name, "Emerson Jane Webber."
1765
01:37:54,130 --> 01:37:55,420
No.
1766
01:37:56,300 --> 01:37:59,550
-Baxter-Webber.
-l hate hyphenated names.
1767
01:38:00,640 --> 01:38:03,680
Are we ever going to agree on anything?
1768
01:38:04,560 --> 01:38:08,430
The little stuff, probably not.
The big stuff? Yes.
1769
01:38:08,940 --> 01:38:10,810
l can live with that.
1770
01:38:11,650 --> 01:38:12,690
Me, too.
1771
01:38:14,900 --> 01:38:16,110
Marry me.
1772
01:38:16,570 --> 01:38:18,150
No.
1773
01:38:19,450 --> 01:38:20,660
l'm just kidding.
1774
01:38:22,580 --> 01:38:24,240
l thought you'd never ask.
1775
01:38:30,330 --> 01:38:32,540
-ls that okay with you, too?
-ls that all right with you?
1776
01:38:32,630 --> 01:38:34,500
Yeah? Yeah?
1777
01:38:37,170 --> 01:38:39,300
Way to go, Tater Tot.
1778
01:38:42,340 --> 01:38:44,300
Hi, little Theo.
1779
01:38:45,640 --> 01:38:47,520
Hi, little guy.
1780
01:38:49,060 --> 01:38:52,810
Gary, he's so beautiful.
1781
01:38:53,690 --> 01:38:57,900
Look at his little nose
and his perfect little lips.
1782
01:38:57,990 --> 01:39:02,200
And he's so wise.
Can't you tell? He's so wise.
1783
01:39:04,240 --> 01:39:08,080
That was the scariest night of my life.
lt was awful.
1784
01:39:09,000 --> 01:39:10,080
No.
1785
01:39:10,870 --> 01:39:12,420
lt was beautiful.
1786
01:39:13,670 --> 01:39:16,670
lt was so incredibly beautiful.
1787
01:39:17,590 --> 01:39:20,720
Yeah. That's what l meant.
1788
01:39:20,930 --> 01:39:23,840
lt was incredibly beautiful.
1789
01:39:25,010 --> 01:39:26,890
l finally found it.
1790
01:39:29,020 --> 01:39:31,230
He's my glow.
1791
01:39:34,190 --> 01:39:37,440
He's my perfect, perfect glow.
1792
01:39:55,380 --> 01:39:57,040
-Feeling all right, Susie?
-Shut up.
1793
01:39:57,090 --> 01:39:58,170
Marco?
1794
01:39:58,550 --> 01:39:59,590
Rosie, hey.
1795
01:39:59,800 --> 01:40:01,760
Hey. What are you guys doing here?
1796
01:40:02,050 --> 01:40:03,550
Dip-shit ran over my toe.
1797
01:40:04,680 --> 01:40:05,760
Oh, my God!
1798
01:40:06,550 --> 01:40:08,720
That is... l'm sorry.
1799
01:40:08,760 --> 01:40:12,350
No, that's okay. lt's funny. Now.
1800
01:40:12,600 --> 01:40:14,190
l'll meet you in the truck, man.
1801
01:40:14,400 --> 01:40:16,270
-l'm really sorry.
-Okay.
1802
01:40:16,520 --> 01:40:19,400
-What are you doing here?
-My cousin,
1803
01:40:19,610 --> 01:40:22,150
the one married to that old...
The racecar dude.
1804
01:40:22,240 --> 01:40:24,950
-Oh, yeah.
-She had her babies, she had twins.
1805
01:40:25,200 --> 01:40:27,570
-Nice. Congratulations. That's great.
-Thanks.
1806
01:40:28,910 --> 01:40:30,280
l was gonna go see them.
1807
01:40:32,120 --> 01:40:33,410
Do you wanna?
1808
01:40:34,080 --> 01:40:36,710
-What?
-l don't know if that's weird.
1809
01:40:36,920 --> 01:40:38,750
lt's a little weird,
1810
01:40:39,800 --> 01:40:41,590
but, yeah, l'd love to.
1811
01:40:47,300 --> 01:40:48,590
You okay?
1812
01:40:49,100 --> 01:40:52,310
Yeah. l'll have another chance
when the time's right.
1813
01:40:52,810 --> 01:40:53,890
You will.
1814
01:40:56,940 --> 01:40:59,060
Those caramels were delicious, by the way.
1815
01:40:59,270 --> 01:41:01,610
The car-mels were really good,
weren't they?
1816
01:41:01,650 --> 01:41:02,900
-Car-mels?
-Yeah.
1817
01:41:03,400 --> 01:41:05,490
Caramels. What is wrong with you?
1818
01:41:07,110 --> 01:41:10,030
That's one good-looking kid you got there,
Dr. Cooper.
1819
01:41:10,240 --> 01:41:11,410
Thanks. You, too.
1820
01:41:11,450 --> 01:41:13,830
When you were born,
l wasn't even in the room.
1821
01:41:13,950 --> 01:41:15,460
Back then, no dad was.
1822
01:41:15,750 --> 01:41:17,920
Yeah. Maybe that was a good thing though.
1823
01:41:18,290 --> 01:41:20,630
l don't know. l missed a lot.
1824
01:41:21,460 --> 01:41:24,300
End of the day, family's all that matters.
1825
01:41:24,550 --> 01:41:27,260
Not the races, and the trophies,
and the endorsements.
1826
01:41:27,300 --> 01:41:31,470
Not the money and the women,
and the sex, and the drugs.
1827
01:41:32,970 --> 01:41:36,980
Partying with Jimmy Buffett
on the back of Willie Nelson's bus.
1828
01:41:39,100 --> 01:41:42,320
None of that means jack shit when l'm gone.
1829
01:41:42,820 --> 01:41:45,490
But you guys. My kids,
1830
01:41:46,150 --> 01:41:48,650
that's all we really leave behind.
1831
01:41:58,170 --> 01:42:01,830
Say, "Mommy." Say, "Mama."
139195
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