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Saturn,
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Saturn,
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Saturn,
Mars, your butthole. These planets could
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Mars, your butthole. These planets could
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Mars, your butthole. These planets could
be our future homes once we destroy
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be our future homes once we destroy
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be our future homes once we destroy
Earth.
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Earth.
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Earth.
But in order to be a successful
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But in order to be a successful
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But in order to be a successful
interplanetary species, we must first
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interplanetary species, we must first
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interplanetary species, we must first
learn about this vital need. Sex. But
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learn about this vital need. Sex. But
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learn about this vital need. Sex. But
not just boring gravityass assisted sex.
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not just boring gravityass assisted sex.
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not just boring gravityass assisted sex.
>> Does that feel good?
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>> Does that feel good?
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>> Does that feel good?
>> I'm talking space.
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>> I'm talking space.
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>> I'm talking space.
To understand the difference, I sat down
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To understand the difference, I sat down
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To understand the difference, I sat down
with scientists Simon Dubet and Maria
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with scientists Simon Dubet and Maria
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with scientists Simon Dubet and Maria
Santea, two sexy sexologists studying
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Santea, two sexy sexologists studying
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Santea, two sexy sexologists studying
sex in space. Before we start having sex
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sex in space. Before we start having sex
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sex in space. Before we start having sex
in space, let me go over my ground
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in space, let me go over my ground
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in space, let me go over my ground
rules. I don't have any.
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rules. I don't have any.
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rules. I don't have any.
>> We're not going to have sex in space.
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>> We're not going to have sex in space.
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>> We're not going to have sex in space.
>> Wait, we're not going to have sex in
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>> Wait, we're not going to have sex in
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>> Wait, we're not going to have sex in
space?
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space?
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space?
>> No,
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>> No,
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>> No,
>> not today.
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>> not today.
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>> not today.
>> So, I guess I'll just ask you questions
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>> So, I guess I'll just ask you questions
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>> So, I guess I'll just ask you questions
and listen.
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and listen.
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and listen.
>> Why is sex in space important?
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>> Why is sex in space important?
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>> Why is sex in space important?
Abstinence is not a viable solution if
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Abstinence is not a viable solution if
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Abstinence is not a viable solution if
we intend to thrive and expand to the
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we intend to thrive and expand to the
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we intend to thrive and expand to the
universe.
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universe.
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universe.
>> The future of human civilization depends
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>> The future of human civilization depends
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>> The future of human civilization depends
on sex in space because there's many
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on sex in space because there's many
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on sex in space because there's many
existential threats to our civilization.
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existential threats to our civilization.
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existential threats to our civilization.
Climate change, nuclear war, asteroids.
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Climate change, nuclear war, asteroids.
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Climate change, nuclear war, asteroids.
>> In other words, in case [\h__\h] like this
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>> In other words, in case [\h__\h] like this
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>> In other words, in case [\h__\h] like this
happens,
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happens,
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happens,
we'll need to smash in space to keep our
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we'll need to smash in space to keep our
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we'll need to smash in space to keep our
species going.
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species going.
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species going.
>> So, there have been no official reports
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>> So, there have been no official reports
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>> So, there have been no official reports
of human sex in space. You're telling me
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of human sex in space. You're telling me
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of human sex in space. You're telling me
no one's ever joined the Thousand Mile
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no one's ever joined the Thousand Mile
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no one's ever joined the Thousand Mile
High Club, as far as you know,
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High Club, as far as you know,
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High Club, as far as you know,
>> or at least admitted to it.
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>> or at least admitted to it.
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>> or at least admitted to it.
>> Well, send me up. I'm ready. When
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>> Well, send me up. I'm ready. When
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>> Well, send me up. I'm ready. When
Costa's up there, it's not going to be
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Costa's up there, it's not going to be
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Costa's up there, it's not going to be
Houston, we have a problem. It's going
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Houston, we have a problem. It's going
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Houston, we have a problem. It's going
to be Houston, we got a boner.
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to be Houston, we got a boner.
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to be Houston, we got a boner.
And since they have no record of sex
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And since they have no record of sex
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And since they have no record of sex
outside our planet, they conduct studies
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outside our planet, they conduct studies
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outside our planet, they conduct studies
in space-like environments here on
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in space-like environments here on
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in space-like environments here on
Earth, minus the actual space part. But
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Earth, minus the actual space part. But
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Earth, minus the actual space part. But
lots of questions remained unanswered,
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lots of questions remained unanswered,
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lots of questions remained unanswered,
which is why I was chosen for this
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which is why I was chosen for this
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which is why I was chosen for this
interview because I'm not afraid to ask
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interview because I'm not afraid to ask
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interview because I'm not afraid to ask
the hard-hitting questions.
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the hard-hitting questions.
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the hard-hitting questions.
How do you initiate foreplay if your
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How do you initiate foreplay if your
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How do you initiate foreplay if your
partner keeps floating away? How do you
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partner keeps floating away? How do you
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partner keeps floating away? How do you
stimulate the G-spot in zero G and also
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stimulate the G-spot in zero G and also
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stimulate the G-spot in zero G and also
just in nonzero G like on Earth? How do
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just in nonzero G like on Earth? How do
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just in nonzero G like on Earth? How do
you have sex with aliens? Yeah, NASA can
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you have sex with aliens? Yeah, NASA can
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you have sex with aliens? Yeah, NASA can
land on the moon, but what happens if a
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land on the moon, but what happens if a
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land on the moon, but what happens if a
condom breaks in orbit? Let's talk jizz.
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condom breaks in orbit? Let's talk jizz.
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condom breaks in orbit? Let's talk jizz.
Where does it go in space? It can go
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Where does it go in space? It can go
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Where does it go in space? It can go
everywhere.
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everywhere.
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everywhere.
>> It needs to be contained. So, there's
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>> It needs to be contained. So, there's
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>> It needs to be contained. So, there's
the possibility of using condoms.
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the possibility of using condoms.
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the possibility of using condoms.
>> Isn't the whole point reproduction up
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>> Isn't the whole point reproduction up
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>> Isn't the whole point reproduction up
there?
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there?
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there?
>> But people don't just have sex for
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>> But people don't just have sex for
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>> But people don't just have sex for
reproduction. They also have sex for
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reproduction. They also have sex for
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reproduction. They also have sex for
pleasure.
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pleasure.
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pleasure.
>> This is what I tell my wife all the
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>> This is what I tell my wife all the
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>> This is what I tell my wife all the
time. But how do you do the nasty
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time. But how do you do the nasty
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time. But how do you do the nasty
outside our planet? One wrong thrust and
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outside our planet? One wrong thrust and
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outside our planet? One wrong thrust and
you're spat into the abyss like an
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you're spat into the abyss like an
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you're spat into the abyss like an
outofcrol fidget spinner. Luckily,
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outofcrol fidget spinner. Luckily,
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outofcrol fidget spinner. Luckily,
there's a solution.
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there's a solution.
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there's a solution.
>> Oh, hey.
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>> Oh, hey.
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>> Oh, hey.
>> These are sex suits. These look more
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>> These are sex suits. These look more
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>> These are sex suits. These look more
like Dr. Evil suits.
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like Dr. Evil suits.
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like Dr. Evil suits.
>> They are the two suit.
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>> They are the two suit.
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>> They are the two suit.
>> This is the two suit.
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>> This is the two suit.
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>> This is the two suit.
>> Yes.
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>> Yes.
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>> Yes.
>> Talk me through space intimacy in a two
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>> Talk me through space intimacy in a two
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>> Talk me through space intimacy in a two
suit.
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suit.
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suit.
>> Step one, get consent. Simon, would you
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>> Step one, get consent. Simon, would you
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>> Step one, get consent. Simon, would you
like to dock with me today?
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like to dock with me today?
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like to dock with me today?
>> You have my enthusiastic consent. Okay.
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>> You have my enthusiastic consent. Okay.
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>> You have my enthusiastic consent. Okay.
>> Step two, remove the front panel.
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>> Step two, remove the front panel.
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>> Step two, remove the front panel.
>> Oh my god. Nothing like the sweet,
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>> Oh my god. Nothing like the sweet,
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>> Oh my god. Nothing like the sweet,
soothing sounds of Velcro to get one in
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soothing sounds of Velcro to get one in
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soothing sounds of Velcro to get one in
the mood.
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the mood.
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the mood.
>> Step three, attach to your partner's
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>> Step three, attach to your partner's
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>> Step three, attach to your partner's
torso. Step four, have a good time.
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torso. Step four, have a good time.
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torso. Step four, have a good time.
These sexy suits were cosmic thirst
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These sexy suits were cosmic thirst
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These sexy suits were cosmic thirst
traps. Oh my god, I'm feeling the energy
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traps. Oh my god, I'm feeling the energy
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traps. Oh my god, I'm feeling the energy
already.
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already.
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already.
>> I was so turned on that I had to try
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>> I was so turned on that I had to try
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>> I was so turned on that I had to try
this two suit for myself and volunteer
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this two suit for myself and volunteer
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this two suit for myself and volunteer
my skills for science.
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my skills for science.
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my skills for science.
So step aside, Tom Hanks. You may have
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So step aside, Tom Hanks. You may have
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So step aside, Tom Hanks. You may have
saved Apollo 13, but for the first time
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saved Apollo 13, but for the first time
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saved Apollo 13, but for the first time
in recorded history, I'm going to have
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in recorded history, I'm going to have
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in recorded history, I'm going to have
sex in a space simulator.
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sex in a space simulator.
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sex in a space simulator.
One small ejaculation for man. One giant
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One small ejaculation for man. One giant
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One small ejaculation for man. One giant
population of mini castas for mankind.
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population of mini castas for mankind.
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population of mini castas for mankind.
>> Who's this lucky lady that's going to
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>> Who's this lucky lady that's going to
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>> Who's this lucky lady that's going to
make history with me and maybe make
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make history with me and maybe make
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make history with me and maybe make
babies?
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babies?
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babies?
>> Meet Judy.
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>> Meet Judy.
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>> Meet Judy.
>> Judy? What about like a real female
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>> Judy? What about like a real female
217
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>> Judy? What about like a real female
human?
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human?
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human?
>> I'll take her. Come here. Come here,
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>> I'll take her. Come here. Come here,
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>> I'll take her. Come here. Come here,
Judy.
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Judy.
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Judy.
It's time for Costa to put the ass in
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It's time for Costa to put the ass in
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It's time for Costa to put the ass in
astronaut.
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Oh.
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Oh.
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Oh.
Huh. Judy. Okay,
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Huh. Judy. Okay,
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Huh. Judy. Okay,
Judy. How do you feel about chest hair?
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Judy. How do you feel about chest hair?
233
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Judy. How do you feel about chest hair?
It's your preference. Awesome.
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It's your preference. Awesome.
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It's your preference. Awesome.
I thought unhooking a bra was tough,
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I thought unhooking a bra was tough,
237
00:04:12,080 --> 00:04:15,990
I thought unhooking a bra was tough,
huh?
238
00:04:15,990 --> 00:04:16,000
239
00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:17,590
>> We learned that we could maybe do some
240
00:04:17,590 --> 00:04:17,600
>> We learned that we could maybe do some
241
00:04:17,600 --> 00:04:19,430
>> We learned that we could maybe do some
modifications to the sue. Add some
242
00:04:19,430 --> 00:04:19,440
modifications to the sue. Add some
243
00:04:19,440 --> 00:04:20,949
modifications to the sue. Add some
handles.
244
00:04:20,949 --> 00:04:20,959
handles.
245
00:04:20,959 --> 00:04:22,870
handles.
>> All right, Costa. You're going to put a
246
00:04:22,870 --> 00:04:22,880
>> All right, Costa. You're going to put a
247
00:04:22,880 --> 00:04:25,350
>> All right, Costa. You're going to put a
condom on a banana. You got a bigger
248
00:04:25,350 --> 00:04:25,360
condom on a banana. You got a bigger
249
00:04:25,360 --> 00:04:30,710
condom on a banana. You got a bigger
one? Okay, here we go. Holy sh Okay,
250
00:04:30,710 --> 00:04:30,720
one? Okay, here we go. Holy sh Okay,
251
00:04:30,720 --> 00:04:33,590
one? Okay, here we go. Holy sh Okay,
here's the condom.
252
00:04:33,590 --> 00:04:33,600
here's the condom.
253
00:04:33,600 --> 00:04:36,950
here's the condom.
Here's the banana.
254
00:04:36,950 --> 00:04:36,960
Here's the banana.
255
00:04:36,960 --> 00:04:39,909
Here's the banana.
It's on.
256
00:04:39,909 --> 00:04:39,919
It's on.
257
00:04:39,919 --> 00:04:45,110
It's on.
>> That's for science.
258
00:04:45,110 --> 00:04:45,120
259
00:04:45,120 --> 00:04:47,510
>> We may need better candidates with
260
00:04:47,510 --> 00:04:47,520
>> We may need better candidates with
261
00:04:47,520 --> 00:04:49,350
>> We may need better candidates with
stronger stomachs.
262
00:04:49,350 --> 00:04:49,360
stronger stomachs.
263
00:04:49,360 --> 00:04:52,150
stronger stomachs.
>> We might also need more respectful
264
00:04:52,150 --> 00:04:52,160
>> We might also need more respectful
265
00:04:52,160 --> 00:04:54,710
>> We might also need more respectful
individuals with a sense of ethics. I'm
266
00:04:54,710 --> 00:04:54,720
individuals with a sense of ethics. I'm
267
00:04:54,720 --> 00:04:56,950
individuals with a sense of ethics. I'm
69ing on the moon.
268
00:04:56,950 --> 00:04:56,960
69ing on the moon.
269
00:04:56,960 --> 00:04:59,110
69ing on the moon.
>> The next steps will be to test some of
270
00:04:59,110 --> 00:04:59,120
>> The next steps will be to test some of
271
00:04:59,120 --> 00:05:02,550
>> The next steps will be to test some of
these experiments in zero G flights and
272
00:05:02,550 --> 00:05:02,560
these experiments in zero G flights and
273
00:05:02,560 --> 00:05:04,790
these experiments in zero G flights and
orbital flights. I did it. Judy's
274
00:05:04,790 --> 00:05:04,800
orbital flights. I did it. Judy's
275
00:05:04,800 --> 00:05:06,550
orbital flights. I did it. Judy's
probably pregnant. I put a condom on a
276
00:05:06,550 --> 00:05:06,560
probably pregnant. I put a condom on a
277
00:05:06,560 --> 00:05:12,870
probably pregnant. I put a condom on a
banana and I feel good about Sorry.
278
00:05:12,870 --> 00:05:12,880
279
00:05:12,880 --> 00:05:15,909
Next stop, space.
280
00:05:15,909 --> 00:05:15,919
Next stop, space.
281
00:05:15,919 --> 00:05:20,440
Next stop, space.
I think I [\h__\h] myself too a little bit.
23232
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