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♪ The end of the
Civil War Was near ♪
2
00:00:14,623 --> 00:00:17,936
♪ When quite accidentally ♪
3
00:00:17,960 --> 00:00:20,221
♪ A hero who sneezed
Abruptly seized ♪
4
00:00:20,245 --> 00:00:23,262
♪ Retreat And
reversed it to victory ♪
5
00:00:25,433 --> 00:00:28,046
♪ His Medal of Honor
Pleased and thrilled ♪
6
00:00:28,070 --> 00:00:29,990
♪ His proud little
Family group ♪
7
00:00:31,423 --> 00:00:33,501
♪ While pinning it on
Some blood was spilled ♪
8
00:00:33,525 --> 00:00:36,036
♪ And so it was
planned He'd command ♪
9
00:00:36,060 --> 00:00:37,572
♪ F Troop! ♪
10
00:00:37,596 --> 00:00:40,575
♪ Where Indian fights
Are colorful sights ♪
11
00:00:40,599 --> 00:00:42,577
♪ And nobody takes a lickin' ♪
12
00:00:42,601 --> 00:00:45,880
♪ Where paleface and redskin ♪
13
00:00:45,904 --> 00:00:48,549
♪ Both turn chicken ♪
14
00:00:48,573 --> 00:00:50,584
♪ When drilling and
fighting Get them down ♪
15
00:00:50,608 --> 00:00:53,387
♪ They know their
morale Can't droop ♪
16
00:00:53,411 --> 00:00:56,073
♪ As long as they
all Relax in town ♪
17
00:00:56,097 --> 00:00:59,777
♪ Before they resume
With a bang and a boom ♪
18
00:00:59,801 --> 00:01:01,717
♪ F Troop! ♪
19
00:01:43,728 --> 00:01:45,339
Good morning. Good morning, sir.
20
00:01:45,363 --> 00:01:47,391
Going someplace?
A scout patrol, sir.
21
00:01:47,415 --> 00:01:49,410
The Hekawis has been
a little restless lately.
22
00:01:49,434 --> 00:01:52,180
It's like sitting on a powder
keg with a sputtering fuse.
23
00:01:52,204 --> 00:01:54,265
I thought they were
temporarily contained.
24
00:01:54,289 --> 00:01:55,532
They're a tricky bunch, sir.
25
00:01:55,556 --> 00:01:56,834
Agarn and me don't like the way
26
00:01:56,858 --> 00:01:58,603
things are beginning
to smell up there.
27
00:01:58,627 --> 00:01:59,870
Hut!
28
00:01:59,894 --> 00:02:00,927
Hyah.
29
00:02:06,101 --> 00:02:08,011
Vanderbilt, ooh, wait, wait.
30
00:02:08,035 --> 00:02:09,846
The... The stake is over there.
31
00:02:09,870 --> 00:02:11,082
Well, what was I aiming at?
32
00:02:11,106 --> 00:02:12,783
The flagpole.
33
00:02:12,807 --> 00:02:15,287
Oh, no wonder it looked so tall.
34
00:02:20,649 --> 00:02:23,828
Well, your... Your distance
is just excellent, Vanderbilt.
35
00:02:23,852 --> 00:02:26,530
Now, you just have to
work on your direction.
36
00:02:35,413 --> 00:02:36,623
Smell good, huh?
37
00:02:36,647 --> 00:02:39,260
Phew, take a
whiff of that stuff.
38
00:02:39,284 --> 00:02:40,261
Ugh!
39
00:02:40,285 --> 00:02:41,529
You call this whiskey?
40
00:02:41,553 --> 00:02:42,896
You call it whiskey.
41
00:02:42,920 --> 00:02:45,933
Hekawi call it nazumahashamuma.
42
00:02:45,957 --> 00:02:47,101
Why?
43
00:02:47,125 --> 00:02:49,136
Uh, paleface translation,
"rat gut." Okay.
44
00:02:49,160 --> 00:02:51,172
Medicine man
use for sick braves.
45
00:02:51,196 --> 00:02:54,308
Not cure but make them
laugh even when it hurt.
46
00:02:56,267 --> 00:02:58,467
Turn that booze
boiler off, will you?
47
00:03:00,605 --> 00:03:02,015
Father?
48
00:03:02,039 --> 00:03:03,984
Hello, Silver Dove.
49
00:03:04,008 --> 00:03:05,386
Hi-yo, Silver.
50
00:03:05,410 --> 00:03:07,188
Hello, sergeant, corporal.
51
00:03:07,212 --> 00:03:08,655
What is it, my daughter?
52
00:03:08,679 --> 00:03:09,723
Mama says come to tepee
53
00:03:09,747 --> 00:03:11,676
and pound buffalo
steak for dinner.
54
00:03:11,700 --> 00:03:13,978
We have buffalo again?
55
00:03:14,002 --> 00:03:17,048
Not bad if marinated
in nazumahashamuma.
56
00:03:17,072 --> 00:03:19,016
Hey, that stuff will
marinate the customers.
57
00:03:19,040 --> 00:03:21,151
We have old Hekawi saying:
58
00:03:21,175 --> 00:03:26,311
When field mouse see
shadow, time to string beads.
59
00:03:27,114 --> 00:03:28,159
What's that mean?
60
00:03:28,183 --> 00:03:29,493
Not know.
61
00:03:29,517 --> 00:03:31,197
Nobody ever ask before.
62
00:03:41,696 --> 00:03:43,807
Shugs, they kidnap daughter!
63
00:03:43,831 --> 00:03:45,008
Well, them dirty, no good...
64
00:03:45,032 --> 00:03:47,592
Hey, what are you trying
to do, wing Silver Dove?
65
00:03:49,955 --> 00:03:52,733
Now, what's going on here?
Are you and the Shugs feuding?
66
00:03:52,757 --> 00:03:54,535
War Cloud, that
son of Shug chief,
67
00:03:54,559 --> 00:03:58,272
he want to marry my
little girl, but I say no!
68
00:03:58,296 --> 00:04:02,876
Shugs not good enough to
lace moccasin of Hekawi maiden!
69
00:04:02,900 --> 00:04:06,781
Sarge, just like
Romeo and Juliet.
70
00:04:06,805 --> 00:04:08,316
What tribe they with?
71
00:04:08,340 --> 00:04:10,651
Look, what are you
standing around for?
72
00:04:10,675 --> 00:04:12,537
Why don't you get your
boys and go after them?
73
00:04:12,561 --> 00:04:16,173
Peaceloving Hekawi fight Indian?
74
00:04:16,197 --> 00:04:17,597
That's your job.
75
00:04:18,433 --> 00:04:19,660
Our job?!
76
00:04:19,684 --> 00:04:22,463
Why you think we
made palefaced brother?
77
00:04:22,487 --> 00:04:25,921
U.S. cavalry always
come to rescue.
78
00:04:40,021 --> 00:04:42,099
Mm, that... That's
very good, Hannibal.
79
00:04:42,123 --> 00:04:44,035
Well, you're getting
closer all the time.
80
00:04:44,059 --> 00:04:46,604
"Taps" ain't much of a
compliment to my cooking.
81
00:04:46,628 --> 00:04:47,905
Well, I'm sorry, Miss Jane,
82
00:04:47,929 --> 00:04:50,441
but that's the closest
thing to eating music I know.
83
00:04:50,465 --> 00:04:53,044
Wilton Parmenter,
look at your plate.
84
00:04:53,068 --> 00:04:54,529
You ain't hardly
touched a thing.
85
00:04:54,553 --> 00:04:56,831
Sure I have. You just piled
it too high to begin with.
86
00:04:56,855 --> 00:04:59,099
I was hoping you'd get
so took with my cooking
87
00:04:59,123 --> 00:05:01,085
you'd wanna eat it
the rest of your life.
88
00:05:01,109 --> 00:05:02,553
That's very kind of you, Janie,
89
00:05:02,577 --> 00:05:03,854
but what if I got transferred?
90
00:05:03,878 --> 00:05:05,039
How would you ship it to me?
91
00:05:05,063 --> 00:05:07,530
Oh, eat your dessert.
92
00:05:09,601 --> 00:05:11,879
Oh, excuse us for
busting in like this, captain,
93
00:05:11,903 --> 00:05:13,480
but this is a real
emergency, sir.
94
00:05:13,504 --> 00:05:14,515
Emergency?
95
00:05:14,539 --> 00:05:16,017
It's a catastrophe. Mm.
96
00:05:19,377 --> 00:05:21,321
Shugs have kidnapped
Wild Eagle's daughter,
97
00:05:21,345 --> 00:05:23,323
and I'd like, with the
captain's permission,
98
00:05:23,347 --> 00:05:24,976
to take the troop and fetch her.
99
00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:28,346
I don't know. I'll have to look
that up in the Regulations Act.
100
00:05:28,370 --> 00:05:30,948
Don't know if we're supposed
to rescue Indians from Indians.
101
00:05:30,972 --> 00:05:33,150
Wilton, will you forget
that consigned book?
102
00:05:33,174 --> 00:05:34,952
It'll be a great
chance to get in solid
103
00:05:34,976 --> 00:05:36,571
with the ferocious
Hekawis, captain.
104
00:05:36,595 --> 00:05:38,673
Well, I... I know that,
corporal. I know that.
105
00:05:38,697 --> 00:05:41,057
But there... There
must be some...
106
00:05:41,199 --> 00:05:42,543
Sergeant, I'll need your help.
107
00:05:42,567 --> 00:05:44,045
And yours too, corporal.
108
00:05:44,069 --> 00:05:45,913
Uh, but the troop?
They won't be needed.
109
00:05:45,937 --> 00:05:47,714
I'll handle this
myself. You, sir?
110
00:05:47,738 --> 00:05:49,517
But we can't take a
chance on losing you.
111
00:05:49,541 --> 00:05:51,052
There'd be bloodthirsty Indians
112
00:05:51,076 --> 00:05:52,670
lurking behind
every rock, captain.
113
00:05:52,694 --> 00:05:54,938
Men, you're forgetting
the old cavalry saying:
114
00:05:54,962 --> 00:05:56,439
There are two
sides to every rock,
115
00:05:56,463 --> 00:05:58,714
and it takes all kinds of
Indians to make the West.
116
00:05:59,851 --> 00:06:00,928
What does that mean?
117
00:06:00,952 --> 00:06:03,314
I don't know. Nobody
ever asked me before.
118
00:06:03,338 --> 00:06:04,470
Ah.
119
00:06:08,676 --> 00:06:11,121
Well, how do I look? Mm.
120
00:06:11,145 --> 00:06:12,756
Well, begging the
captain's pardon,
121
00:06:12,780 --> 00:06:14,425
like a sneaky Hiawatha.
122
00:06:14,449 --> 00:06:16,660
Ah, I think you look
just fine, sir. Oh.
123
00:06:16,684 --> 00:06:19,896
Hey, sarge, ain't you
kind of tall for an Indian?
124
00:06:19,920 --> 00:06:22,032
Well, I'll walk on my
knees. Nobody will notice.
125
00:06:22,056 --> 00:06:23,434
There's nothing to worry about.
126
00:06:23,458 --> 00:06:25,135
In The Last of the Mohicans,
127
00:06:25,159 --> 00:06:26,837
they did this sort
of thing all the time.
128
00:06:26,861 --> 00:06:28,038
And it worked?
129
00:06:28,062 --> 00:06:30,073
I... I don't remember that part.
130
00:06:30,097 --> 00:06:32,832
I'm afraid we better
get going. Mm.
131
00:06:36,103 --> 00:06:38,415
What's the matter?
132
00:06:38,439 --> 00:06:40,718
Oh, it's me.
133
00:06:40,742 --> 00:06:43,262
Oh, come on, Minnehaha.
134
00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:50,244
Dobbs, look.
135
00:06:50,268 --> 00:06:51,534
Indian attack!
136
00:06:52,486 --> 00:06:53,631
Indians?
137
00:06:53,655 --> 00:06:55,815
To the parapets, men!
138
00:07:01,396 --> 00:07:02,472
We're the Indians!
139
00:07:02,496 --> 00:07:03,980
And we're friendly!
140
00:07:05,400 --> 00:07:08,044
I got one! I got one!
141
00:07:08,068 --> 00:07:10,046
Vanderbilt, you nut head!
142
00:07:10,070 --> 00:07:12,549
It's me, Duffy!
143
00:07:12,573 --> 00:07:14,017
Oh, excuse me, Duffy.
144
00:07:14,041 --> 00:07:15,252
Ah!
145
00:07:15,276 --> 00:07:16,887
Will you get off of the captain?
146
00:07:16,911 --> 00:07:18,088
Everybody, let me go!
147
00:07:18,112 --> 00:07:19,411
All right, get up.
148
00:07:21,883 --> 00:07:23,293
Bunch of knuckleheads!
149
00:07:23,317 --> 00:07:25,851
Come on, Agarn,
let's get the horses.
150
00:07:31,960 --> 00:07:33,470
We... We're sorry, captain.
151
00:07:33,494 --> 00:07:35,472
You ain't mad 'cause you
got jumped on, are you?
152
00:07:35,496 --> 00:07:37,107
Oh, no, no, of course not.
153
00:07:37,131 --> 00:07:40,945
It shows that F Troop
is courageous and alert.
154
00:07:40,969 --> 00:07:43,113
All right, now, men, the
three of us are going out
155
00:07:43,137 --> 00:07:44,381
to raid the Shugs.
156
00:07:44,405 --> 00:07:45,849
And in case we
don't make it back,
157
00:07:45,873 --> 00:07:47,651
I want you all to
remember that it's...
158
00:07:47,675 --> 00:07:49,886
It's all part of
winning the West.
159
00:07:49,910 --> 00:07:52,556
Uh, Private Dobbs, you'll
be in charge with the fort.
160
00:07:52,580 --> 00:07:54,813
Well, thank you, sir.
161
00:07:55,734 --> 00:07:57,132
Time to mount up, captain.
162
00:08:03,274 --> 00:08:04,274
Oop!
163
00:08:05,810 --> 00:08:06,804
Dobbs.
164
00:08:06,828 --> 00:08:08,108
Dob...
165
00:08:14,169 --> 00:08:15,312
You all right, sir? Yeah.
166
00:08:15,336 --> 00:08:16,903
All right, here we go.
167
00:08:23,812 --> 00:08:27,658
I must leave to post
lookout, Silver Dove.
168
00:08:27,682 --> 00:08:29,626
Sleep without fear.
169
00:08:29,650 --> 00:08:32,396
I am not afraid, War Cloud.
170
00:08:32,420 --> 00:08:33,786
Good night.
171
00:08:36,691 --> 00:08:38,903
I didn't know Indians kissed.
172
00:08:38,927 --> 00:08:42,128
In The Last of the
Mohicans, they rub noses.
173
00:08:43,564 --> 00:08:46,199
Yeah, well, that's why they
were the last of the Mohicans.
174
00:08:57,562 --> 00:08:59,607
Heart Lips is leaving, captain.
175
00:08:59,631 --> 00:09:01,308
Shall we rush him? No, no, no.
176
00:09:01,332 --> 00:09:03,210
You two men, take
care of the guards.
177
00:09:03,234 --> 00:09:05,679
I'll sneak in through
the back and get the girl.
178
00:09:05,703 --> 00:09:06,913
Now, don't forget,
179
00:09:06,937 --> 00:09:09,015
if you're spotted,
you're an Injun.
180
00:09:09,039 --> 00:09:10,319
You betchum.
181
00:09:23,837 --> 00:09:24,837
Shh.
182
00:09:26,307 --> 00:09:28,385
Don't be afraid, Silver Dove.
183
00:09:28,409 --> 00:09:30,576
You comum with me.
184
00:09:32,113 --> 00:09:34,024
I am not going any place.
185
00:09:34,048 --> 00:09:36,182
I have been kidnapped
enough for one day.
186
00:09:40,188 --> 00:09:41,365
You cheat them on count.
187
00:09:41,389 --> 00:09:43,733
I no cheat them on count.
188
00:09:43,757 --> 00:09:46,603
Now... BOTH: Ibitty
bibitty sibitty sam
189
00:09:46,627 --> 00:09:48,038
Ibitty sibitty kanaba
190
00:09:48,062 --> 00:09:51,641
Kanaba in, Kanaba out
Kanaba over the waterspout
191
00:09:51,665 --> 00:09:54,100
Out goes Y-O-U!
192
00:09:55,487 --> 00:09:59,567
We with U.S. cavalry.
Cavalry. You, come.
193
00:09:59,591 --> 00:10:01,335
Come.
194
00:10:01,359 --> 00:10:02,503
Let's hurry up, captain.
195
00:10:02,527 --> 00:10:04,572
It can get drafty around
here without your scalp.
196
00:10:04,596 --> 00:10:06,139
Sergeant O'Rourke,
197
00:10:06,163 --> 00:10:08,843
aren't you a little old
to be playing Indian?
198
00:10:08,867 --> 00:10:10,110
Never mind about that.
199
00:10:10,134 --> 00:10:11,579
Now, come on.
We're gonna go home.
200
00:10:11,603 --> 00:10:12,947
I don't want to go home.
201
00:10:12,971 --> 00:10:14,782
Well, your father
wants you to go home!
202
00:10:14,806 --> 00:10:17,417
And I thought this
was a free country.
203
00:10:17,441 --> 00:10:18,801
Come on, let's go.
204
00:10:20,277 --> 00:10:21,989
We got her, corporal.
205
00:10:22,013 --> 00:10:23,958
Hey, sarge! They're coming to.
206
00:10:23,982 --> 00:10:25,559
Ibitty bibitty... We got no time
207
00:10:25,583 --> 00:10:27,717
for "Ibitty bibitty sam."
208
00:10:43,267 --> 00:10:47,147
Wild Eagle happy
Silver Dove back in coop.
209
00:10:47,171 --> 00:10:48,171
We drink.
210
00:10:54,646 --> 00:10:56,657
Oh that... That...
211
00:10:56,681 --> 00:10:58,191
It's smooth, huh, captain?
212
00:10:58,215 --> 00:11:02,084
Uh, Miss Dove, may I have
the pleasure of this dance?
213
00:11:30,481 --> 00:11:32,459
For shame, Wild Eagle,
214
00:11:32,483 --> 00:11:36,530
your daughter rescued, and
you forget ancient Hekawi custom.
215
00:11:36,554 --> 00:11:38,599
I not forget nothing.
216
00:11:38,623 --> 00:11:41,368
Wedding of daughter take
place one week from today.
217
00:11:41,392 --> 00:11:45,138
Hey, I didn't know Silver Dove
is gonna get married. Who to?
218
00:11:45,162 --> 00:11:48,375
Reward for save Hekawi maiden.
219
00:11:48,399 --> 00:11:50,744
Tradition say she
must marry captain.
220
00:11:50,768 --> 00:11:52,512
The captain?! Listen, chief.
221
00:11:52,536 --> 00:11:54,848
You'd better stay out of
that nashahashahamamuma.
222
00:11:54,872 --> 00:11:57,417
What's...? What's our captain
got to do with your tradition?
223
00:11:57,441 --> 00:12:00,253
Ah, very old. Go
back many moons.
224
00:12:00,277 --> 00:12:02,590
Many, many, many,
many, many, many...
225
00:12:02,614 --> 00:12:05,125
Stop with the moons.
226
00:12:05,149 --> 00:12:06,727
Before sun come up.
227
00:12:06,751 --> 00:12:08,395
Make arrangement for wedding.
228
00:12:08,419 --> 00:12:10,898
Listen, Wild Eagle, you can't
make the captain get married.
229
00:12:10,922 --> 00:12:12,232
He's not a redskin.
230
00:12:12,256 --> 00:12:14,201
Him pinkskin. That close enough.
231
00:12:14,225 --> 00:12:15,669
Well, it's against his religion.
232
00:12:15,693 --> 00:12:17,605
He's a... A... A
confirmed bachelor.
233
00:12:17,629 --> 00:12:21,174
Captain marry Silver
Dove, or we have big fight!
234
00:12:21,198 --> 00:12:22,576
Fight, hah. You?
235
00:12:22,600 --> 00:12:24,745
Ha-ha, the tribe that
invented the peace pipe.
236
00:12:24,769 --> 00:12:25,846
We fight.
237
00:12:25,870 --> 00:12:28,348
Tradition only thing
Hekawi fight for!
238
00:12:28,372 --> 00:12:29,583
You would?
239
00:12:29,607 --> 00:12:32,352
Even if we have to
hire Apache to do it.
240
00:12:32,376 --> 00:12:35,188
Go get blanket for smoke signal.
241
00:12:35,212 --> 00:12:37,424
Send out wedding announcement.
242
00:12:37,448 --> 00:12:38,692
Uh, listen, chief.
243
00:12:38,716 --> 00:12:40,794
Don't you say anything
to the captain about this.
244
00:12:40,818 --> 00:12:42,596
Now, please, just...
Just let me handle it.
245
00:12:42,620 --> 00:12:44,098
Okay, but you handle.
246
00:12:44,122 --> 00:12:45,966
Move daughter to fort,
247
00:12:45,990 --> 00:12:52,305
cook for captain, wash
clothes, one week engagement.
248
00:12:52,329 --> 00:12:54,864
Then... big wedding.
249
00:13:03,975 --> 00:13:06,208
They make lovely couple.
250
00:13:24,695 --> 00:13:27,140
Oh, you... You don't have
to cook for me, Silver Dove.
251
00:13:27,164 --> 00:13:28,608
I've got an orderly for that.
252
00:13:28,632 --> 00:13:31,711
It is part of Hekawi tradition.
253
00:13:31,735 --> 00:13:33,113
Do you not like my cooking?
254
00:13:33,137 --> 00:13:37,283
Oh, yes, yes, I... Why, I... I
love your... dried otter rump.
255
00:13:37,307 --> 00:13:40,154
It's... It's even better than
your pickled rattlesnake.
256
00:13:40,178 --> 00:13:44,730
This is my specialty. Candied
sumac and hawk giblets.
257
00:13:50,972 --> 00:13:52,383
Oh that's... That's...
258
00:13:52,407 --> 00:13:55,469
That's... I think... I think it
needs a little more seasoning.
259
00:13:55,493 --> 00:13:57,170
I will go to the
kitchen and get some.
260
00:13:57,194 --> 00:14:00,139
Uh, you'll find it in a jar
marked "bicarbonate."
261
00:14:01,599 --> 00:14:03,560
Hawk giblets.
262
00:14:03,584 --> 00:14:05,728
I tell you, there
can't be a wedding.
263
00:14:05,752 --> 00:14:07,197
The captain marries Silver Dove,
264
00:14:07,221 --> 00:14:09,032
we might as well turn honest.
265
00:14:09,056 --> 00:14:10,233
Why don't we tell them
266
00:14:10,257 --> 00:14:12,202
he's got a wife in
Philadelphia and 20 kids?
267
00:14:12,226 --> 00:14:15,872
Knucklehead, would you believe
the captain has got 20 kids?
268
00:14:15,896 --> 00:14:18,508
Make it 19. I'll...
269
00:14:18,532 --> 00:14:20,310
Sarge, I'm just trying to help.
270
00:14:20,334 --> 00:14:21,644
Oh, big help, yeah.
271
00:14:21,668 --> 00:14:23,813
If the captain gets
palsy with the Hekawi,
272
00:14:23,837 --> 00:14:25,615
he'll find out they're
not so ferocious,
273
00:14:25,639 --> 00:14:27,751
and that they're making
whiskey for our saloon.
274
00:14:27,775 --> 00:14:29,319
What do you think
I'm worried about?
275
00:14:29,343 --> 00:14:31,288
That will be the end of
O'Rourke Enterprises.
276
00:14:31,312 --> 00:14:32,856
The saloon, the
laundry, the hotel,
277
00:14:32,880 --> 00:14:34,625
the real estate
office on Boot Hill.
278
00:14:34,649 --> 00:14:36,093
Boot Hill you can lose.
279
00:14:36,117 --> 00:14:37,260
It's a nice place to visit,
280
00:14:37,284 --> 00:14:39,124
but I wouldn't
want to live there.
281
00:14:39,687 --> 00:14:41,632
Here comes some more trouble.
282
00:14:41,656 --> 00:14:43,133
Oh, uh, Wrangler, I'm...
283
00:14:43,157 --> 00:14:45,435
I'm sorry, but you can't see
the captain for a few days.
284
00:14:45,459 --> 00:14:47,337
He's mapping out a
very important campaign.
285
00:14:47,361 --> 00:14:50,557
Yeah, a special request
from... General Custer. Mm.
286
00:14:50,581 --> 00:14:52,810
What's a tepee doing
on an army post?
287
00:14:53,935 --> 00:14:55,846
Tepee? What tepee?
Oh, the Injun tepee.
288
00:14:55,870 --> 00:14:57,714
Sarge, she means
the Injun tepee.
289
00:14:57,738 --> 00:14:58,816
Yeah, well, that belongs
290
00:14:58,840 --> 00:15:00,317
to the captain's
new housekeeper.
291
00:15:00,341 --> 00:15:01,718
She's an Indian. Housekeeper?
292
00:15:01,742 --> 00:15:03,187
What's he need a
housekeeper for?
293
00:15:03,211 --> 00:15:05,722
Now, now... He's
got an orderly and me.
294
00:15:05,746 --> 00:15:07,191
Now, wait a minute, Wrangler.
295
00:15:07,215 --> 00:15:08,992
There's nothing to
get all riled up about.
296
00:15:09,016 --> 00:15:11,828
She's one of them big, fat,
squaw-type housekeepers.
297
00:15:11,852 --> 00:15:14,548
Yeah, well, I don't like
it nohow. Out of my way.
298
00:15:14,572 --> 00:15:16,516
Wrangler, now, listen.
You can't go in there.
299
00:15:16,540 --> 00:15:18,985
It's off-limits to
blond female civilians!
300
00:15:19,009 --> 00:15:20,319
Wrangler!
301
00:15:20,343 --> 00:15:21,922
What's she gonna
do when she finds out
302
00:15:21,946 --> 00:15:23,557
the captain is getting married?
303
00:15:23,581 --> 00:15:25,981
What's he gonna do when he
finds out he's getting married?
304
00:15:28,035 --> 00:15:29,035
Come in.
305
00:15:33,040 --> 00:15:35,151
Oh, Janie, you're
just in time for dinner.
306
00:15:35,175 --> 00:15:37,788
In time for? I
thought I brung it.
307
00:15:37,812 --> 00:15:39,790
Baked quail. Shot it myself.
308
00:15:39,814 --> 00:15:42,092
Oh, well, thank you.
Thank you very much.
309
00:15:42,116 --> 00:15:45,245
S-say, would like some, uh,
hawk giblets and candied sumac?
310
00:15:45,269 --> 00:15:46,546
To eat?
311
00:15:46,570 --> 00:15:48,348
It's Silver's specialty.
312
00:15:48,372 --> 00:15:49,649
Silver?
313
00:15:49,673 --> 00:15:51,952
Wilton Parmenter, what do
you need a housekeeper for?
314
00:15:51,976 --> 00:15:53,319
Well, I don't really.
315
00:15:53,343 --> 00:15:55,122
It's just that I rescued
her from the Shugs,
316
00:15:55,146 --> 00:15:57,290
and O'Rourke says
it's Hekawi tradition.
317
00:15:57,314 --> 00:15:58,558
What's that got to do with it?
318
00:15:58,582 --> 00:16:00,426
You ain't no Hekawi.
319
00:16:00,450 --> 00:16:02,062
How fat is she anyway?
320
00:16:02,086 --> 00:16:04,047
Silver? SILVER: Yes, captain?
321
00:16:05,405 --> 00:16:06,482
Housekeeper?
322
00:16:06,506 --> 00:16:07,717
Yes, uh, Silver Dove,
323
00:16:07,741 --> 00:16:09,519
I'd like you to meet
Jane Angelica Thrift.
324
00:16:09,543 --> 00:16:10,921
She brought us some baked quail.
325
00:16:10,945 --> 00:16:11,939
Us?
326
00:16:11,963 --> 00:16:13,673
Thank you, Miss Thrift.
327
00:16:13,697 --> 00:16:15,978
I'll put it in the
kitchen and cool it.
328
00:16:17,067 --> 00:16:20,046
Yeah, you do that.
329
00:16:20,070 --> 00:16:22,215
Wilton Parmenter, I
don't like this arrangement
330
00:16:22,239 --> 00:16:23,350
one picayune little bit.
331
00:16:23,374 --> 00:16:24,451
Get rid of her.
332
00:16:24,475 --> 00:16:26,353
What? And make Wild Eagle mad?
333
00:16:26,377 --> 00:16:27,854
Look, if I mess
up their tradition,
334
00:16:27,878 --> 00:16:29,356
he's liable to get
ferocious again
335
00:16:29,380 --> 00:16:30,624
and wipe out this whole fort.
336
00:16:30,648 --> 00:16:32,192
Fiddle-faddle. But, Janie,
337
00:16:32,216 --> 00:16:34,093
it's just part of
winning the West.
338
00:16:34,117 --> 00:16:36,630
Yeah, well, you don't have
to do it one girl at a time.
339
00:16:36,654 --> 00:16:40,055
"Fat housekeeper."
Oh, Janie, look...
340
00:16:44,678 --> 00:16:46,998
Here's the seasoning, captain.
341
00:16:54,888 --> 00:16:56,154
She doesn't look fat.
342
00:17:00,661 --> 00:17:02,639
Will you stop
pacing up and down?
343
00:17:02,663 --> 00:17:03,807
You make me nervous.
344
00:17:03,831 --> 00:17:05,776
You asked me to
help, didn't you?
345
00:17:05,800 --> 00:17:08,344
How am I gonna get that
chief to stop the wedding?
346
00:17:08,368 --> 00:17:10,079
How?
347
00:17:10,103 --> 00:17:11,515
Sarge! Huh? What?
348
00:17:11,539 --> 00:17:13,082
A great idea!
349
00:17:13,106 --> 00:17:14,451
What is it? You got one?
350
00:17:14,475 --> 00:17:16,119
No, that's what we
need, a great idea.
351
00:17:16,143 --> 00:17:17,621
You little pig.
352
00:17:17,645 --> 00:17:18,645
Why, I should...
353
00:17:22,316 --> 00:17:23,326
What are you doing?
354
00:17:23,350 --> 00:17:25,429
Listen to that beat. It's wild.
355
00:17:25,453 --> 00:17:27,864
It's a message from the chief.
356
00:17:27,888 --> 00:17:28,965
What does it say?
357
00:17:28,989 --> 00:17:30,967
When are you gonna
learn how learn to read?
358
00:17:30,991 --> 00:17:32,702
Gee, a night letter.
359
00:17:32,726 --> 00:17:34,025
Wait a minute.
360
00:17:35,429 --> 00:17:39,275
"Medicine Man check tradition.
361
00:17:39,299 --> 00:17:44,536
"Wedding must take
place in full moon.
362
00:17:46,373 --> 00:17:47,350
Tonight!"
363
00:17:47,374 --> 00:17:48,652
Tonight?!
364
00:17:48,676 --> 00:17:50,053
Sarge, what are we gonna do?
365
00:17:50,077 --> 00:17:52,255
Wait a minute. There's more.
366
00:17:52,279 --> 00:17:53,857
"Bring present."
367
00:17:53,881 --> 00:17:55,992
I'll bring him a present.
368
00:17:56,016 --> 00:17:57,727
Listen, you get the captain.
369
00:17:57,751 --> 00:17:59,463
Take him up there,
but for Pete's sake,
370
00:17:59,487 --> 00:18:01,397
don't let him know
it's his own wedding.
371
00:18:01,421 --> 00:18:03,733
Now, just stall
until I get there.
372
00:18:03,757 --> 00:18:05,168
Where are you going?
373
00:18:05,192 --> 00:18:07,303
Where do you think I'm
going? To get a present.
374
00:18:07,327 --> 00:18:08,438
Mm-hm.
375
00:18:13,601 --> 00:18:15,612
Hi, I come in peace.
376
00:18:15,636 --> 00:18:17,703
Uh, where's your boss?
377
00:18:19,473 --> 00:18:21,351
Him Ibitty. Mm.
378
00:18:21,375 --> 00:18:23,753
Ibitty bibitty Sibitty sam
379
00:18:23,777 --> 00:18:28,191
Ibitty bibitty Sam
Uh, whoa. Kanaba.
380
00:18:28,215 --> 00:18:31,717
Ibitty bibitty Sibitty sam
381
00:18:33,870 --> 00:18:35,014
Half hour long enough.
382
00:18:35,038 --> 00:18:36,205
Call them tie.
383
00:18:38,342 --> 00:18:40,587
I've never been to an
Indian wedding before.
384
00:18:40,611 --> 00:18:41,688
Which one's the groom?
385
00:18:41,712 --> 00:18:43,356
The groom? Oh, the groom.
386
00:18:44,415 --> 00:18:46,193
He's around here someplace.
387
00:18:46,217 --> 00:18:47,961
I wish I knew where sarge was.
388
00:18:47,985 --> 00:18:48,979
Tug of war over.
389
00:18:49,003 --> 00:18:51,982
You have other paleface
wedding tradition?
390
00:18:52,006 --> 00:18:53,483
The paleface wedding tradition.
391
00:18:53,507 --> 00:18:55,352
Well, once, we've had...
392
00:18:55,376 --> 00:18:57,153
dancing around the maypole,
393
00:18:57,177 --> 00:18:58,655
we've had, uh,
dunking for apples,
394
00:18:58,679 --> 00:19:00,357
The potato-sack race,
395
00:19:00,381 --> 00:19:02,425
the snipe hunt... And wait...
396
00:19:02,449 --> 00:19:04,227
Musical chairs. Corporal.
397
00:19:04,251 --> 00:19:07,697
Oh, captain, a wedding wouldn't
be legal without musical chairs.
398
00:19:07,721 --> 00:19:10,534
Now, all of you, Hekawi
form one big, oblong circle...
399
00:19:10,558 --> 00:19:11,535
Stop!
400
00:19:11,559 --> 00:19:13,570
You hung them up long enough.
401
00:19:13,594 --> 00:19:14,704
Wedding begin.
402
00:19:14,728 --> 00:19:16,205
Start music.
403
00:19:16,229 --> 00:19:18,125
A one, a two.
404
00:19:21,785 --> 00:19:24,297
You know, if this were any
other kind of a wedding ceremony,
405
00:19:24,321 --> 00:19:27,033
I'd be standing exactly
where the groom should be.
406
00:19:27,057 --> 00:19:30,470
Yeah, well, the Indians don't
do it that way no more, captain.
407
00:19:30,494 --> 00:19:31,771
A whole new system.
408
00:19:31,795 --> 00:19:34,274
Oh, yeah, well, where does
the groom usually stand?
409
00:19:34,298 --> 00:19:36,409
Oh, anyplace.
410
00:19:36,433 --> 00:19:38,711
Sometimes, he
doesn't even show up.
411
00:19:38,735 --> 00:19:40,680
Just like the sarge.
412
00:19:40,704 --> 00:19:42,282
Yeah, I was just
telling the corporal
413
00:19:42,306 --> 00:19:44,467
that I've never been this
close to a wedding before.
414
00:19:44,491 --> 00:19:46,068
You never get any closer.
415
00:19:46,092 --> 00:19:47,654
Who's the lucky man?
416
00:19:47,678 --> 00:19:49,922
Me. Unload one daughter.
417
00:19:57,955 --> 00:19:59,299
Go ahead, doc.
418
00:20:02,526 --> 00:20:04,905
"Dearly belovum..." AGARN: Wait!
419
00:20:04,929 --> 00:20:08,074
If you don't wanna play musical
chairs, how about charades?
420
00:20:08,098 --> 00:20:09,509
Oh, it's a barrel of fun.
421
00:20:09,533 --> 00:20:11,044
Be quiet!
422
00:20:11,068 --> 00:20:14,714
What fun got to do
with get married?
423
00:20:14,738 --> 00:20:16,405
"Dearly belovum..."
424
00:20:16,873 --> 00:20:17,934
Wait.
425
00:20:17,958 --> 00:20:19,302
Why didn't I think of it before?
426
00:20:19,326 --> 00:20:21,855
A chess tournament!
Practically ain't no fun at all.
427
00:20:21,879 --> 00:20:24,557
Corporal, you're really
getting out of line now.
428
00:20:24,581 --> 00:20:27,260
This lovely girl should have
been married hours ago.
429
00:20:27,284 --> 00:20:28,495
Ain't that the truth.
430
00:20:28,519 --> 00:20:30,062
You're not to interfere again,
431
00:20:30,086 --> 00:20:31,664
and that's an order.
432
00:20:31,688 --> 00:20:32,666
Go ahead, doctor.
433
00:20:32,690 --> 00:20:33,900
Some wedding.
434
00:20:33,924 --> 00:20:36,803
Hope marriage last this long.
435
00:20:36,827 --> 00:20:40,006
"Dearly belovum..." Not yet.
436
00:20:40,030 --> 00:20:41,930
Groom move out of place.
437
00:20:43,967 --> 00:20:44,944
Uh, who, me?
438
00:20:44,968 --> 00:20:46,179
Heh-heh-heh. No, no.
439
00:20:46,203 --> 00:20:47,631
No, no, I'm not the groom.
440
00:20:47,655 --> 00:20:49,365
You not flower girl.
441
00:20:49,389 --> 00:20:52,368
No, no, I'm...
442
00:20:52,392 --> 00:20:54,070
No, no. Oh, now, wait a minute.
443
00:20:54,094 --> 00:20:55,138
W-wait, no, there's...
444
00:20:55,162 --> 00:20:56,806
There's been a
terrible mistake here.
445
00:20:56,830 --> 00:20:58,307
No, no, I'm not getting married.
446
00:20:58,331 --> 00:21:00,810
You save Hekawi,
you marry Hekawi.
447
00:21:00,834 --> 00:21:02,278
Tradition.
448
00:21:02,302 --> 00:21:05,414
Oh, look, chief,
your Silver Dove
449
00:21:05,438 --> 00:21:06,916
i-is a lovely girl
and everything,
450
00:21:06,940 --> 00:21:09,119
but what... She hasn't
even met my mother.
451
00:21:09,143 --> 00:21:12,022
Back home in Philadelphia,
we believe in long engagements.
452
00:21:12,046 --> 00:21:14,374
Why, I... I... I don't even
know you're daughter.
453
00:21:14,398 --> 00:21:16,999
You get to be real good
friends on honeymoon.
454
00:21:18,335 --> 00:21:21,381
- "Dearly belovum..."
- Wait!
455
00:21:21,405 --> 00:21:23,884
Uh, ch-chief...
Chi-chi... I'm sorry,
456
00:21:23,908 --> 00:21:26,552
but I-I just remembered I
have to be back at the fort.
457
00:21:26,576 --> 00:21:29,022
I'm the officer in charge, and
I have to make a bed check.
458
00:21:29,046 --> 00:21:31,324
Uh, good night, heh.
459
00:21:31,348 --> 00:21:32,325
Hey, come on, please.
460
00:21:32,349 --> 00:21:33,393
You want me to be A-W-O-L?
461
00:21:33,417 --> 00:21:35,095
I forgot to write myself a pass.
462
00:21:35,119 --> 00:21:36,429
Sarge!
463
00:21:36,453 --> 00:21:37,898
Will you put me down, please?
464
00:21:37,922 --> 00:21:39,565
I don't wanna get married!
465
00:21:39,589 --> 00:21:41,473
Uh, no offense, Silver Dove.
466
00:21:43,643 --> 00:21:45,155
"Dearly belovum..."
467
00:21:45,179 --> 00:21:46,489
I forgot a ring.
468
00:21:46,513 --> 00:21:48,558
He forgot a ring. I-I-I-I
don't have a ring. I...
469
00:21:48,582 --> 00:21:49,859
Excuse me, one and all,
470
00:21:49,883 --> 00:21:51,961
I-I have to go back to
Philadelphia and get a ring.
471
00:21:51,985 --> 00:21:53,897
Nice trip, sir. Yes, thank you.
472
00:21:53,921 --> 00:21:57,400
"Dearly belovum,
"many moons ago,
473
00:21:57,424 --> 00:22:00,936
many, many, many, many..."
474
00:22:05,131 --> 00:22:10,202
Mishuaga, Minnehaha,
wapan, Wapaka.
475
00:22:13,540 --> 00:22:15,451
Big showoff.
476
00:22:15,475 --> 00:22:17,420
Hear this, all Hekawis.
477
00:22:17,444 --> 00:22:20,273
I bring prophesy from
Happy Hunting Ground.
478
00:22:20,297 --> 00:22:22,708
Spirit of wedding very angry.
479
00:22:22,732 --> 00:22:24,477
This marriage without love,
480
00:22:24,501 --> 00:22:26,947
and love greatest
of all tradition.
481
00:22:26,971 --> 00:22:27,981
I gotta get out of here.
482
00:22:28,005 --> 00:22:29,816
My blood pressure's
ready to pop.
483
00:22:29,840 --> 00:22:36,122
Autumn night, spirit of
wedding will deliver true husband
484
00:22:36,146 --> 00:22:37,623
for this bride.
485
00:22:50,361 --> 00:22:53,306
See, now spirit of
wedding be happy.
486
00:22:53,330 --> 00:22:55,641
Hear me, oh, Hekawis.
487
00:22:55,665 --> 00:22:58,066
Medicine man go
back to Great Spirit.
488
00:23:10,331 --> 00:23:12,142
Now, that's what I
call a medicine man.
489
00:23:12,166 --> 00:23:15,000
Bah, him just flashy quack.
490
00:23:29,683 --> 00:23:32,662
We have wise old Indian saying:
491
00:23:32,686 --> 00:23:38,134
Ingalakahaka... manasha hoya.
492
00:23:38,158 --> 00:23:40,536
What does that mean?
493
00:23:40,560 --> 00:23:46,343
"If I wise old Indian, would I
have him for medicine man?"
494
00:23:59,612 --> 00:24:00,890
There you are!
495
00:24:00,914 --> 00:24:03,726
Big help you turned out
to be! What's the matter?
496
00:24:03,750 --> 00:24:05,929
You asked me to stall the
wedding. Where were you?
497
00:24:05,953 --> 00:24:08,331
Well, I got tied up.
You know how it is, hm.
498
00:24:08,355 --> 00:24:09,665
It's a good thing I was there,
499
00:24:09,689 --> 00:24:11,667
or the captain would
be married right now!
500
00:24:11,691 --> 00:24:12,835
If it wasn't for me and...
501
00:24:12,859 --> 00:24:14,804
devil face. Who's that?
502
00:24:14,828 --> 00:24:17,206
You should have seen him, sarge.
503
00:24:17,230 --> 00:24:19,342
That medicine man must
have been 12 feet tall,
504
00:24:19,366 --> 00:24:21,811
sitting up on top
of a wild horse.
505
00:24:21,835 --> 00:24:23,813
Smoke, flames
coming out of his nose.
506
00:24:23,837 --> 00:24:24,914
I'm telling you,
507
00:24:24,938 --> 00:24:26,582
he scared the heck
out of the Hekawis.
508
00:24:26,606 --> 00:24:28,084
Didn't bother you, though none?
509
00:24:28,108 --> 00:24:31,153
No, I don't take nothing
from no medicine man.
510
00:24:31,177 --> 00:24:32,956
I stood right up to
him and I told him,
511
00:24:32,980 --> 00:24:35,391
"I don't care if
you're 20 feet tall.
512
00:24:35,415 --> 00:24:37,360
"There ain't gonna
be no wedding.
513
00:24:37,384 --> 00:24:41,364
Not while my name is
Corporal Randolph Agarn."
514
00:24:41,388 --> 00:24:43,299
Namashumahamakama.
515
00:24:43,323 --> 00:24:44,455
Yeah, that's just...
516
00:24:45,458 --> 00:24:46,458
Ah.
517
00:24:51,147 --> 00:24:52,848
Goodnight, Randolph.
37128
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