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Subtitles resynced
and notes by AsifAkheir♪♪
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One, two. Two, two.
3
00:00:23,931 --> 00:00:25,566
♪ So please you, sir, we much regret
4
00:00:25,799 --> 00:00:28,002
♪ If we have failed in etiquette
5
00:00:28,237 --> 00:00:29,771
♪ Towards a man of rank so high
6
00:00:30,005 --> 00:00:31,839
♪ We shall know better by and by
7
00:00:32,073 --> 00:00:34,275
♪ But youth, of course, must have its fling
8
00:00:34,510 --> 00:00:36,513
♪ So pardon us, so pardon us
9
00:00:36,746 --> 00:00:38,281
♪ And don't in girlhood's happy spring
10
00:00:38,514 --> 00:00:40,617
♪ Be hard on us, be hard on us
11
00:00:40,852 --> 00:00:43,287
♪ If we're inclined to dance and sing
12
00:00:43,521 --> 00:00:44,789
♪ Tralalalala
13
00:00:45,057 --> 00:00:47,925
♪ But youth, of course, must have its fling
14
00:00:48,159 --> 00:00:49,126
♪ So pardon us
15
00:00:49,361 --> 00:00:51,964
♪ And don't in girlhood's happy spring
16
00:00:52,197 --> 00:00:53,298
♪ Be hard on us
17
00:00:53,533 --> 00:00:56,169
♪ But youth, of course, must have its fling
18
00:00:56,402 --> 00:00:57,270
♪ So pardon us
19
00:00:57,537 --> 00:00:59,439
♪ Tralalala la la la
20
00:00:59,673 --> 00:01:01,675
♪ Tralalala la la
21
00:01:01,909 --> 00:01:03,911
♪ Tralalala la la
22
00:01:04,178 --> 00:01:06,214
♪ Tra lalalalalala
23
00:01:06,448 --> 00:01:11,419
♪ Tralalalalalala la!
24
00:02:13,527 --> 00:02:16,496
- Sir Arthur, what are you doing?
- Going to the theatre.
25
00:02:16,730 --> 00:02:19,099
- No, it is not possible.
- I have no choice!
26
00:02:19,333 --> 00:02:22,802
- You must get back...
- Louis!
27
00:02:25,407 --> 00:02:29,512
- Hot coffee, very strong, please.
- D'accord.
28
00:02:41,492 --> 00:02:45,396
- Louis! "Schnell", please!
- Don't move.
29
00:02:46,163 --> 00:02:49,734
Clothilde, encore du café. Vite.
30
00:02:51,804 --> 00:02:54,039
Sir Arthur, la tasse, s'il vous plaît.
31
00:02:54,273 --> 00:02:57,411
- Bonne chance, Sir Arthur.- Merci.
32
00:02:57,645 --> 00:02:59,480
Nicht so schnell.
33
00:02:59,715 --> 00:03:01,616
Louis, ich muss das allein tun.
34
00:03:01,849 --> 00:03:05,453
I'll be fine. Now go and fetch the cab.
35
00:03:17,401 --> 00:03:19,235
- Canton.
- Good evening, sir.
36
00:03:19,504 --> 00:03:20,639
Arthur!
37
00:03:20,905 --> 00:03:22,940
- Arthur, is this wise?
- No, it's foolish.
38
00:03:23,174 --> 00:03:26,377
- Do you intend to go on?
- Yes, Helen. I've never missed one yet.
39
00:03:26,612 --> 00:03:28,046
I'll let everybody know.
40
00:03:28,280 --> 00:03:31,284
- Here, take a drink.
- Thank you.
41
00:03:31,518 --> 00:03:33,219
Oh, that's better, Frank.
42
00:03:33,453 --> 00:03:36,124
- Your gloves, sir.
- Very good, Louis.
43
00:03:36,358 --> 00:03:39,894
This "is" a surprise, sir.
44
00:04:22,810 --> 00:04:24,445
♪ As up we string the faithless king
45
00:04:24,679 --> 00:04:26,414
♪ In the old familiar way
46
00:04:26,649 --> 00:04:28,117
♪ We'll shout ha ha! Hip hip hurrah!
47
00:04:28,385 --> 00:04:31,420
♪ Hip hip hip hip hurrah!
48
00:04:31,654 --> 00:04:33,690
♪ As we make an end of her false papa!
49
00:04:33,924 --> 00:04:37,095
♪ Hurrah! Hurrah!
50
00:04:37,329 --> 00:04:40,097
- Permission, Mr Cook.
- Permission, Shrimp.
51
00:04:40,331 --> 00:04:41,132
Come!
52
00:04:41,366 --> 00:04:44,503
Five minutes, Mr Grossmith.
53
00:05:01,489 --> 00:05:04,927
♪ If you give me your attention
I will tell you what I am
54
00:05:05,161 --> 00:05:06,663
♪ I'm a genuine philanthropist
55
00:05:06,896 --> 00:05:08,362
♪ All other kinds are sham
56
00:05:08,597 --> 00:05:10,133
♪ Each little fault of temper
57
00:05:10,367 --> 00:05:11,935
♪ And each social defect
58
00:05:12,168 --> 00:05:13,536
♪ In my erring fellow creatures
59
00:05:13,771 --> 00:05:15,238
♪ I endeavour to correct
60
00:05:15,505 --> 00:05:17,007
♪ To all their little weaknesses
61
00:05:17,241 --> 00:05:18,776
♪ I open people's eyes
62
00:05:19,010 --> 00:05:21,846
♪ And little plans to snub
the self-sufficient I devise
63
00:05:22,081 --> 00:05:23,782
♪ I love my fellow creatures
64
00:05:24,016 --> 00:05:25,784
♪ I do all the good I can
65
00:05:26,019 --> 00:05:28,822
♪ Yet everybody says
I'm such a disagreeable man
66
00:05:29,056 --> 00:05:32,526
♪ And I can't think why
67
00:05:36,331 --> 00:05:38,131
♪ I'm sure I'm no ascetic
68
00:05:38,366 --> 00:05:39,968
♪ I'm as pleasant as can be
69
00:05:40,202 --> 00:05:43,372
♪ You'll always find me ready
with a crushing repartee
70
00:05:43,606 --> 00:05:46,942
♪ I've an irritating chuckle,
I've a celebrated sneer
71
00:05:47,176 --> 00:05:48,311
♪ I've an entertaining snigger
72
00:05:48,545 --> 00:05:50,346
♪ I've a fascinating leer
73
00:05:50,580 --> 00:05:53,583
♪ To everybody's prejudice
I know a thing or two
74
00:05:53,817 --> 00:05:56,888
♪ I can tell a woman's age
in half a minute - and I do
75
00:05:57,122 --> 00:05:59,024
♪ But although I try to make myself
76
00:05:59,258 --> 00:06:01,025
♪ As pleasant as I can
77
00:06:01,259 --> 00:06:04,096
♪ Yet everybody says
I am a disagreeable man
78
00:06:04,330 --> 00:06:06,098
♪ And I can't think why
79
00:06:06,333 --> 00:06:09,001
♪ He can't think why
80
00:06:09,268 --> 00:06:11,705
♪ I can't think
81
00:06:11,939 --> 00:06:15,408
♪ Why
82
00:06:19,148 --> 00:06:22,185
- Monsieur.- Bonsoir.
83
00:06:22,419 --> 00:06:25,989
- Vous avez lá un succés certain.- Merci.
84
00:06:26,223 --> 00:06:30,427
What do you expect me to do?
Kiss the carpenters?
85
00:06:33,531 --> 00:06:37,002
Arthur!
86
00:06:38,169 --> 00:06:39,871
Let's get him up.
87
00:06:40,105 --> 00:06:42,241
Come on, sir.
88
00:06:42,507 --> 00:06:44,342
Arthur, take some brandy.
89
00:06:44,577 --> 00:06:46,411
What happened? What happened?!
90
00:06:46,646 --> 00:06:50,151
Is Doctor Lynch in the house?
91
00:06:52,487 --> 00:06:54,320
Listen to this! Today's "Times".
92
00:06:54,589 --> 00:06:57,226
"'Princess Ida' will
probably run for a year...
93
00:06:57,459 --> 00:07:01,061
...keeping the Savoy treasury
agreeably replete all the while."
94
00:07:01,296 --> 00:07:02,932
"All London will flock to hear it."
95
00:07:03,166 --> 00:07:06,536
"So will our provincial,
American and continental visitors."
96
00:07:06,769 --> 00:07:10,273
"Copies of its words and music
will be sold by tens of thousands."
97
00:07:10,507 --> 00:07:14,613
"Everybody connected with it will have
a good time for at least twelve months."
98
00:07:14,847 --> 00:07:16,414
"So mote it be."
99
00:07:16,648 --> 00:07:20,018
- How splendid, Willie!
- Sugared words, Lucy.
100
00:07:20,252 --> 00:07:21,854
Listen.
101
00:07:22,087 --> 00:07:26,593
"The opera is above the level of all
other entertainments before the public."
102
00:07:26,827 --> 00:07:29,997
"Still, I cannot pronounce it
to be in any way...
103
00:07:30,230 --> 00:07:32,366
...an improvement upon its predecessors."
104
00:07:32,633 --> 00:07:35,270
"To me, words and music alike reveal...
105
00:07:35,503 --> 00:07:39,874
...symptoms of fatigue in their
respective composer and author."
106
00:07:40,109 --> 00:07:43,446
"Arthur Sullivan cannot write
other than in pleasing manner...
107
00:07:43,713 --> 00:07:47,650
...but several numbers in 'Princess Ida'
lack the freshness and spontaneity...
108
00:07:47,885 --> 00:07:50,488
...of 'The Pirates of Penzance',
'Patience, lolanthe'...
109
00:07:50,755 --> 00:07:52,956
...or 'The Sorcerer', his best operatic work."
110
00:07:53,191 --> 00:07:54,659
Oh! Is it?
111
00:07:54,893 --> 00:07:57,461
"Or 'HMS Pinafore', the most popular."
112
00:07:57,696 --> 00:08:02,501
"WS Gilbert abundantly proves
he is still the legitimate monarch...
113
00:08:02,735 --> 00:08:05,237
...of the realm of Topsy-Turvydom."
114
00:08:05,472 --> 00:08:08,708
Thank you very much(!)
115
00:08:08,942 --> 00:08:12,981
"But his incongruities are more
elaborately worked up than of yore...
116
00:08:13,215 --> 00:08:15,749
...and therefore less funny."
117
00:08:15,984 --> 00:08:19,789
"Moreover, the story is a dull one!"
118
00:08:20,023 --> 00:08:21,858
- Burn it, Pidgeon!
- Sir.
119
00:08:22,092 --> 00:08:23,926
Willie...!
120
00:08:24,194 --> 00:08:28,065
Your kidneys are getting cold!
121
00:08:30,634 --> 00:08:33,771
The show's doing splendidly.
Full houses and a healthy advance.
122
00:08:34,005 --> 00:08:35,773
- Capital.
- Three tours on the road.
123
00:08:36,007 --> 00:08:38,209
Pirates, Patience and lolanthe.
124
00:08:38,477 --> 00:08:40,512
- And four in rehearsal.
- Merveilleux.
125
00:08:40,746 --> 00:08:42,581
New York can't wait for "Ida".
126
00:08:42,816 --> 00:08:45,052
Ah, New York. How splendid.
127
00:08:45,318 --> 00:08:48,054
- Helen has us booked up to year's end.
- Tireless as ever.
128
00:08:48,288 --> 00:08:49,890
All part of my day's work.
129
00:08:50,158 --> 00:08:52,193
- Tea, Miss Lenoir?
- No, thank you, Louis.
130
00:08:52,427 --> 00:08:54,696
Very well.
131
00:08:54,030 --> 00:08:57,499
I hope your confinement
hasn't made you restless.
132
00:08:57,733 --> 00:09:00,736
How have you been passing the time?
133
00:09:00,969 --> 00:09:03,640
I've made some resolutions, Helen.
134
00:09:03,874 --> 00:09:08,879
- A little late in the new year, perhaps.
- Better late than never.
135
00:09:10,181 --> 00:09:13,117
May we know what they are, Arthur?
136
00:09:13,351 --> 00:09:15,787
Why not?
137
00:09:16,022 --> 00:09:17,857
One.
138
00:09:18,091 --> 00:09:20,993
To travel to the Continent
as soon as my health permits.
139
00:09:21,228 --> 00:09:23,028
- Very wise.
- I think so.
140
00:09:23,262 --> 00:09:24,798
Two.
141
00:09:25,032 --> 00:09:28,036
To look for a country house
where I may repair each summer...
142
00:09:28,269 --> 00:09:30,236
...without having to cross the Channel.
143
00:09:30,471 --> 00:09:33,841
- Three. To take more exercise.
- Excellent, Arthur. About time, too.
144
00:09:34,076 --> 00:09:37,213
A leaf out of your book, D'Oyly.
I must walk more.
145
00:09:37,480 --> 00:09:40,315
And is there a number four?
146
00:09:40,549 --> 00:09:42,952
Yes.
147
00:09:43,186 --> 00:09:47,257
To write no more operas for the Savoy.
148
00:09:50,028 --> 00:09:53,731
- And what is number five?
- To fly to the moon in his bed socks!
149
00:09:53,999 --> 00:09:57,103
No, I'm serious.
I have to write a grand opera.
150
00:09:57,336 --> 00:09:59,905
People expect it of me.
I must not disappoint them.
151
00:10:00,139 --> 00:10:03,409
I cannot waste any more time
on these trivial soufflés.
152
00:10:03,677 --> 00:10:07,148
Do you know I haven't written
a symphony for over 20 years?
153
00:10:07,382 --> 00:10:10,919
Not an unprofitable 20 years,
if I may say so.
154
00:10:11,153 --> 00:10:12,553
Arthur.
155
00:10:12,788 --> 00:10:15,791
If you would learn to organise
your time more efficiently...
156
00:10:16,024 --> 00:10:17,859
...you could do everything you wished.
157
00:10:18,094 --> 00:10:22,032
My time is finite, Helen. I must fill it
with that which is important to me.
158
00:10:22,266 --> 00:10:25,869
Is not the Savoy Theatre
important to you?
159
00:10:26,103 --> 00:10:29,541
This work with Gilbert
is quite simply killing me.
160
00:10:29,775 --> 00:10:33,111
Working with Gilbert would kill anybody.
161
00:10:33,346 --> 00:10:37,117
Is your contract with D'Oyly
and Mr Gilbert not important to you?
162
00:10:37,350 --> 00:10:39,652
But our present concern is your health.
163
00:10:39,919 --> 00:10:42,121
You must go to the South of France
and recover.
164
00:10:42,356 --> 00:10:45,592
We can discuss this on your return.
165
00:10:45,826 --> 00:10:47,395
I shall recover, D'Oyly.
166
00:10:47,629 --> 00:10:49,998
And I shall return.
167
00:10:50,232 --> 00:10:54,036
But there will be nothing to discuss.
168
00:10:54,537 --> 00:10:56,405
Did you dine at the Beefsteak Club?
169
00:10:56,639 --> 00:10:59,643
Yes. Somewhat unsatisfactory.
170
00:10:59,877 --> 00:11:01,711
Oh.
171
00:11:01,945 --> 00:11:04,181
Well, you missed Mrs Judd's rabbit curry.
172
00:11:04,415 --> 00:11:08,019
One gets the impression that everyone
is snickering behind one's back.
173
00:11:08,253 --> 00:11:10,856
Perhaps you could have some
for tomorrow's lunch.
174
00:11:11,123 --> 00:11:14,594
The king of Topsy-Turvydom.
175
00:11:14,828 --> 00:11:18,298
Humiliating.
176
00:11:20,067 --> 00:11:22,869
You look a little uncomfortable.
177
00:11:23,103 --> 00:11:25,506
I'm comfortable enough.
178
00:11:25,740 --> 00:11:27,575
I watched a bit from the wings.
179
00:11:27,843 --> 00:11:30,145
- Oh, did you?
- The first act.
180
00:11:30,378 --> 00:11:32,413
Seemed to be going well, surprisingly.
181
00:11:32,682 --> 00:11:36,153
There! You see?
182
00:11:41,258 --> 00:11:42,994
Would you like me to read to you?
183
00:11:43,228 --> 00:11:45,563
No, thank you. I'll leave you.
184
00:11:45,796 --> 00:11:47,665
You must be tired.
185
00:11:47,899 --> 00:11:49,700
No, I'm not in the slightest.
186
00:11:49,935 --> 00:11:51,803
Wrong of me to unburden myself on you.
187
00:11:52,037 --> 00:11:55,741
Don't be silly. That's why I'm here.
188
00:11:56,076 --> 00:11:59,112
Come and talk to your Kitty.
189
00:11:59,346 --> 00:12:03,684
Sometimes one wonders
why one bothers.
190
00:12:03,951 --> 00:12:07,288
They say jump... you jump.
191
00:12:07,522 --> 00:12:11,126
- Good night, my dear.
- Good night.
192
00:13:16,570 --> 00:13:19,807
Lady Colin is endeavouring
to persuade us to take up smoking.
193
00:13:20,041 --> 00:13:22,643
She's writing an article for
The Saturday Review.
194
00:13:22,877 --> 00:13:25,514
She proposes that nicotine
is a gift from the gods...
195
00:13:25,747 --> 00:13:28,583
...and if men may benefit
from its soothing qualities...
196
00:13:28,852 --> 00:13:31,721
...why, then, may women not also?
197
00:13:31,955 --> 00:13:33,956
My poor daughter now believes that...
198
00:13:34,190 --> 00:13:37,961
...smoking is an extension
of the communion...
199
00:13:38,195 --> 00:13:40,063
...between a woman and her husband.
200
00:13:40,331 --> 00:13:43,602
- Will she smoke on her wedding day?
201
00:13:43,836 --> 00:13:45,636
Heaven forfend!
202
00:13:45,870 --> 00:13:48,439
Lady Colin is... irresistible.
203
00:13:48,674 --> 00:13:51,311
She cannot conceive
why the Irish are starving...
204
00:13:51,545 --> 00:13:55,048
...when there's
"lots of good fish in the sea".
205
00:13:55,281 --> 00:13:57,116
She most probably has a point.
206
00:13:57,351 --> 00:13:59,554
- Oh, there's good news from Dublin.
- Mmm?
207
00:13:59,788 --> 00:14:02,491
The Churchills "are" to return to London.
208
00:14:02,724 --> 00:14:04,559
Forgiven, but not forgotten.
209
00:14:04,794 --> 00:14:08,263
I do hope so.
210
00:14:08,964 --> 00:14:11,601
Jenny says Winston is 11,
covered in freckles...
211
00:14:11,835 --> 00:14:15,838
...and has a total disdain for authority.
212
00:14:20,879 --> 00:14:22,713
Mmm.
213
00:14:22,948 --> 00:14:25,049
I shall miss this fragrance.
214
00:14:25,283 --> 00:14:28,487
Sicilian lemons.
215
00:14:28,721 --> 00:14:33,493
Have you chosen your Beethoven
for the Philharmonic Society?
216
00:14:33,727 --> 00:14:35,261
As a matter of fact, I have.
217
00:14:35,529 --> 00:14:36,797
Yes.
218
00:14:37,031 --> 00:14:39,966
- Nº 2?
- The Seventh.
219
00:14:40,201 --> 00:14:43,104
- Ah.
- More dramatic.
220
00:14:43,371 --> 00:14:46,875
And that is to be your work
whilst you're away?
221
00:14:47,109 --> 00:14:51,648
That... and only that.
222
00:14:52,515 --> 00:14:55,152
Will there be room for Mr Gilbert
in your baggage?
223
00:14:55,386 --> 00:14:58,122
Certainly not. He's far too large.
224
00:14:58,356 --> 00:15:00,791
Food for thought.
225
00:15:01,025 --> 00:15:03,895
Ce n'est pas á moi de dire.
226
00:15:04,129 --> 00:15:06,733
Indeed not.
227
00:15:06,967 --> 00:15:09,602
Which train will you catch?
228
00:15:09,835 --> 00:15:13,307
The tidal train.
229
00:15:13,674 --> 00:15:15,508
Up at seven.
230
00:15:15,742 --> 00:15:18,746
Arriver á Paris á 3:30?
231
00:15:19,014 --> 00:15:21,317
Á peu prés.
232
00:15:21,551 --> 00:15:25,054
How will you spend
your first night of liberty?
233
00:15:25,288 --> 00:15:27,122
I shall take some exercise.
234
00:15:27,356 --> 00:15:30,158
Hmm!
235
00:15:45,878 --> 00:15:48,948
La poupée de Paris, alors!
236
00:15:49,216 --> 00:15:50,550
♪ Les oiseaux
237
00:15:50,784 --> 00:15:57,692
♪ Dans la charmille
238
00:16:05,568 --> 00:16:08,237
C'est émouvant!
239
00:16:08,470 --> 00:16:10,272
Whoo!
240
00:16:16,713 --> 00:16:19,417
Allez, battez!
241
00:16:27,294 --> 00:16:29,696
C'est mes cuisses!
242
00:16:29,929 --> 00:16:33,533
Plus de cuisses!
243
00:16:38,206 --> 00:16:41,676
Whoo!
244
00:16:46,650 --> 00:16:47,884
Comment vous appelez-vous?
245
00:16:48,117 --> 00:16:51,754
Voilá Mademoiselle Fromage, monsieur.
246
00:16:51,890 --> 00:16:54,525
Oui, c'est vrai.
247
00:16:54,659 --> 00:16:57,328
Quelle sorte de fromage?
248
00:16:57,562 --> 00:16:58,830
Peut-ìtre un fromage suisse?
249
00:16:59,098 --> 00:17:00,031
Oui, oui!
250
00:17:00,298 --> 00:17:02,867
Avec des petits trous?
251
00:17:04,871 --> 00:17:06,439
Si je peux vous embrasser...
252
00:17:06,673 --> 00:17:09,409
Et vous aussi.
253
00:17:14,948 --> 00:17:16,816
♪ This helmet I suppose
254
00:17:17,051 --> 00:17:19,354
♪ Was meant to ward off blows
255
00:17:19,622 --> 00:17:22,523
♪ It's very hot and weighs a lot
256
00:17:22,757 --> 00:17:24,493
♪ As many a guardsman knows
257
00:17:24,728 --> 00:17:27,564
♪ As many a guardsman knows
258
00:17:27,798 --> 00:17:30,434
♪ As many a guardsman knows
259
00:17:30,700 --> 00:17:32,602
♪ As many a guardsman knows
260
00:17:32,836 --> 00:17:35,640
♪ So off
261
00:17:35,874 --> 00:17:38,676
♪ So off that helmet goes
262
00:17:38,911 --> 00:17:41,013
♪ Yes, yes, yes!
263
00:17:41,247 --> 00:17:44,150
♪ So off that helmet goes
264
00:17:44,417 --> 00:17:46,652
♪ This tight-fitting cuirass
265
00:17:46,886 --> 00:17:48,755
♪ Is but a useless mass
266
00:17:49,023 --> 00:17:51,926
♪ It's made of steel and weighs a deal
267
00:17:52,160 --> 00:17:54,061
♪ This tight-fitting cuirass
268
00:17:54,296 --> 00:17:56,765
♪ Is but a useless mass
269
00:17:56,999 --> 00:18:00,201
♪ A man is but an ass
270
00:18:00,435 --> 00:18:02,738
♪ Who fights in a cuirass
271
00:18:02,972 --> 00:18:05,642
♪ So off
272
00:18:05,876 --> 00:18:07,977
♪ So off goes that cuirass
273
00:18:08,211 --> 00:18:11,248
♪ Yes, yes, yes
274
00:18:11,482 --> 00:18:14,085
♪ So off goes that cuirass
275
00:18:14,318 --> 00:18:16,487
♪ Behold!
276
00:18:16,721 --> 00:18:20,960
My voice.
My voice - I've strained my voice.
277
00:18:21,194 --> 00:18:23,061
I've been trying too hard.
278
00:18:23,295 --> 00:18:25,731
The smaller the house,
the greater the effort.
279
00:18:25,965 --> 00:18:28,735
I'm very cross with myself.
I should know better.
280
00:18:28,970 --> 00:18:32,573
One's knocking one's pipes out
in a vain attempt to elicit a response...
281
00:18:32,807 --> 00:18:37,245
...from three colonial bishops, two elderly
ladies and an intoxicated costermonger!
282
00:18:37,478 --> 00:18:40,482
They're roasting in their own lard,
like the Christmas goose.
283
00:18:40,716 --> 00:18:42,818
And the costermonger left at the interval.
284
00:18:43,052 --> 00:18:44,554
- Did he?
- Mm.
285
00:18:44,821 --> 00:18:47,491
Ha! A man of infinite taste. Clearly!
286
00:18:47,724 --> 00:18:49,793
Will you take a wee gargle
of my salt water?
287
00:18:50,061 --> 00:18:52,796
No, thank you.
It would put me in mind of my boyhood.
288
00:18:53,064 --> 00:18:54,699
Mm. Do forgive me.
289
00:18:54,932 --> 00:18:58,370
Not at all.
290
00:18:58,504 --> 00:19:01,541
I fear that dear Mr Gilbert
has run out of ideas.
291
00:19:01,774 --> 00:19:04,143
- No.
- He doesn't know what to do with me!
292
00:19:04,377 --> 00:19:05,612
Ponder this.
293
00:19:05,846 --> 00:19:08,281
He thrusts me into
tight-fitting pots and pails...
294
00:19:08,515 --> 00:19:10,450
...and poaches me
like a fucking haddock!
295
00:19:10,685 --> 00:19:13,020
Forgive my Anglo-Saxon, Mr Butt.
Have a biscuit.
296
00:19:13,254 --> 00:19:16,123
Thank you, sir.
I'll take one 'ome with me for me supper.
297
00:19:16,358 --> 00:19:18,193
Dickie, it's just this heat.
298
00:19:18,460 --> 00:19:21,396
It addles the noodles.
It happened to me in Milan frequently.
299
00:19:21,665 --> 00:19:24,334
Ah, Milano. Bellissimo.
300
00:19:24,567 --> 00:19:28,039
The heat less hellish.
301
00:19:30,040 --> 00:19:32,476
I am humiliated.
302
00:19:32,743 --> 00:19:34,578
One might as well be in the chorus.
303
00:19:34,813 --> 00:19:37,315
Away wi' you, you wee monkey!
304
00:19:37,582 --> 00:19:39,117
Alas, no!
305
00:19:39,385 --> 00:19:43,556
The reign of the Emperor Gilbert
is all but at an end.
306
00:19:43,824 --> 00:19:46,493
I consider this to be his best piece so far.
307
00:19:46,727 --> 00:19:50,064
With all due respect, Durward,
your romantic opinion may be informed...
308
00:19:50,298 --> 00:19:54,234
...by the fact that you take a rather good
role, in which you are "trés splendide".
309
00:19:54,503 --> 00:19:57,339
- Mm, grazie.- Prego.
310
00:19:57,573 --> 00:20:00,041
But I consider "Princess Ida"
to be their worst.
311
00:20:00,275 --> 00:20:01,977
- Do you?
- I do.
312
00:20:02,211 --> 00:20:04,848
Where is the panache of "Pirates"?
313
00:20:05,082 --> 00:20:06,984
The wit of the "Pinafore"?
314
00:20:07,219 --> 00:20:10,054
From such a face and form as mine...
315
00:20:10,288 --> 00:20:13,058
...the noblest sentiments...
316
00:20:13,292 --> 00:20:15,326
...sound like the black utterances...
317
00:20:15,560 --> 00:20:17,763
...of a depraved imagination.
318
00:20:17,997 --> 00:20:19,566
It was very good, you know.
319
00:20:19,799 --> 00:20:22,202
- Yes, Dickie.
- Do forgive me, dear boy.
320
00:20:22,468 --> 00:20:24,704
I don't wish to be the prophet of doom.
321
00:20:24,938 --> 00:20:26,773
But one has the distinct feeling...
322
00:20:27,008 --> 00:20:32,880
...that the sword of Damocles hovers
ominously over the Savoy Theatre.
323
00:20:36,886 --> 00:20:38,286
How was Temple?
324
00:20:38,521 --> 00:20:41,291
Oh. Rather disgruntled, I fear.
325
00:20:41,525 --> 00:20:44,128
As though he wasn't
quite enjoying himself.
326
00:20:44,361 --> 00:20:46,262
His heart wasn't in it.
327
00:20:46,496 --> 00:20:49,534
No. One can usually rely
on Mr Temple, can't one?
328
00:20:49,768 --> 00:20:52,703
Mmm.
329
00:20:52,937 --> 00:20:57,042
And the ladies' chorus look as though
they could all do with a hearty meal.
330
00:20:57,310 --> 00:20:59,045
It's this infernal heat.
331
00:20:59,312 --> 00:21:03,750
One still has to feed oneself, Willie,
whatever the weather.
332
00:21:03,984 --> 00:21:06,053
And the audience
were fanning themselves...
333
00:21:06,287 --> 00:21:08,188
...with their programmes and libretti.
334
00:21:08,423 --> 00:21:12,227
Most distracting when one is striving
to concentrate on the performance...
335
00:21:12,461 --> 00:21:15,965
...to have in the corner of one's eye
this confounded flapping!
336
00:21:16,231 --> 00:21:18,300
Makes one want to stand up and shout!
337
00:21:18,534 --> 00:21:21,572
- I trust you restrained yourself.
- Of course I did, Willie.
338
00:21:21,805 --> 00:21:23,973
- More tea, ma'am?
- No, thank you, Pidgeon.
339
00:21:24,208 --> 00:21:25,743
- Coffee, sir?
- Yes.
340
00:21:25,977 --> 00:21:28,813
Pidgeon. Did my father say anything else?
341
00:21:29,047 --> 00:21:32,350
Nothing I should care to repeat, sir.
342
00:21:32,583 --> 00:21:35,421
There were more people
on the stage than in the audience.
343
00:21:35,656 --> 00:21:38,123
Did you count them?
344
00:21:38,391 --> 00:21:42,129
- No, of course I didn't.
- Then how do you know?
345
00:21:42,363 --> 00:21:44,231
I was speaking metaphorically.
346
00:21:44,465 --> 00:21:46,299
You were exaggerating.
347
00:21:46,534 --> 00:21:49,337
- Anything else, sir?
- No, thank you.
348
00:21:49,571 --> 00:21:52,640
Oh, horror!
349
00:21:52,908 --> 00:21:54,342
Horror!
350
00:21:54,576 --> 00:21:57,614
Horror!
351
00:21:57,848 --> 00:22:01,351
Willie.
352
00:22:02,953 --> 00:22:04,788
- Come in.
353
00:22:05,022 --> 00:22:07,991
- Good morning, my dear.
- Good morning, Richard.
354
00:22:08,226 --> 00:22:11,263
- Another scorcher.
- The everlasting bonfire.
355
00:22:11,497 --> 00:22:15,601
- Good morning, guv'nor.
- Morning, Barker.
356
00:22:17,303 --> 00:22:19,138
Thank you.
357
00:22:19,373 --> 00:22:22,142
- Shocking.
- Most alarming.
358
00:22:22,375 --> 00:22:24,746
A mediocre evening.
359
00:22:24,980 --> 00:22:26,814
- Three fainters.
- In the audience?
360
00:22:27,048 --> 00:22:28,882
I fear so. All women.
361
00:22:29,151 --> 00:22:31,386
- Any absentees?
- Four chorus members.
362
00:22:31,620 --> 00:22:35,624
- With doctors' notes?
- Yes.
363
00:22:35,725 --> 00:22:39,228
And... how are the returns?
364
00:22:40,264 --> 00:22:44,735
- Oh, good grief!
- It's an improvement on Monday.
365
00:22:47,305 --> 00:22:49,741
Seven dead horses
in the Strand this morning...
366
00:22:49,975 --> 00:22:52,011
Well, one down by Trafalgar Square.
367
00:22:52,244 --> 00:22:54,813
How can you sit there
in your hat and coat, Barker?
368
00:22:55,047 --> 00:22:57,584
I'm too hot to remove them, Mr Carte.
369
00:22:56,918 --> 00:23:00,554
- This is developing into a crisis.
- Indeed it is.
370
00:23:00,788 --> 00:23:04,592
- A man has a family to support.
- I fear we shall all have to "pray" for rain.
371
00:23:04,825 --> 00:23:07,828
If it's any consolation,
every theatre in town is afflicted.
372
00:23:08,062 --> 00:23:10,032
Even the Gaiety, graced as it is with...
373
00:23:10,266 --> 00:23:13,869
...Madame Bernhardt's
execrable Lady Macbeth. 38 per cent.
374
00:23:14,103 --> 00:23:16,505
- Who told you that, Barker?
- Hollingshead.
375
00:23:16,739 --> 00:23:20,010
I played a game of cricket
with him this morning at Coram's Fields.
376
00:23:20,244 --> 00:23:23,514
- In this heat?
- Er, yes, madam, but not in this attire.
377
00:23:23,748 --> 00:23:24,648
Good.
378
00:23:24,916 --> 00:23:27,451
- Mr Hollingshead told you a fib, Barker.
- Indeed?
379
00:23:27,686 --> 00:23:30,389
He's only playing to 29 per cent.
380
00:23:30,623 --> 00:23:33,893
Mr Hollingshead has no need
to lie to "me", Mr Carte.
381
00:23:34,127 --> 00:23:37,597
Mr Hollingshead has much need
to lie to everybody, Mr Barker.
382
00:23:37,831 --> 00:23:41,768
- Especially you.
- Gentlemen...!
383
00:23:48,109 --> 00:23:50,412
Are you there?
384
00:23:50,646 --> 00:23:52,547
Yes.
385
00:23:52,782 --> 00:23:56,253
8505.
386
00:24:04,329 --> 00:24:05,597
Hello!
387
00:24:05,831 --> 00:24:08,366
- Is that you, Mr Gilbert?
- Hello!
388
00:24:08,634 --> 00:24:11,436
- Hello?
- Good morning, Barker.
389
00:24:11,670 --> 00:24:14,139
This is Barker speaking!
390
00:24:14,374 --> 00:24:16,542
- Gilbert here!
- Good morning, Mr Gilbert.
391
00:24:16,776 --> 00:24:19,246
How are we today, Barker?
392
00:24:19,513 --> 00:24:23,250
Are we popular, or are we mad?
393
00:24:23,584 --> 00:24:26,287
Er... We are popular!
394
00:24:26,555 --> 00:24:27,889
Very good. Carry on.
395
00:24:28,157 --> 00:24:32,227
Here is your message for today!
396
00:24:32,695 --> 00:24:36,032
U, U, plus ten shillings and sixpence!
397
00:24:36,266 --> 00:24:38,734
- Can you repeat that, please?!
- Yes.
398
00:24:38,969 --> 00:24:40,838
U... U!
399
00:24:41,072 --> 00:24:42,974
So that's U for udder...
400
00:24:43,241 --> 00:24:46,277
...U for udder,
plus ten shillings and sixpence.
401
00:24:46,511 --> 00:24:49,047
So you have two udders, Barker!
402
00:24:49,315 --> 00:24:52,984
- Er... yes.
- I always suspected as much!
403
00:24:56,590 --> 00:24:58,192
- Thank you.
- Thank you!
404
00:24:58,426 --> 00:25:01,295
- Goodbye!
- Goodbye, Mr Gilbert!
405
00:25:01,529 --> 00:25:03,832
I'm going to hang up the telephone now!
406
00:25:04,066 --> 00:25:07,536
In... Indeed you are, sir.
407
00:25:16,379 --> 00:25:19,984
Well, I'm, er... going out to seek
a little Italian hokey-pokey...
408
00:25:20,218 --> 00:25:23,821
...and I care not who knows it.
- Thank you, Barker.
409
00:25:24,055 --> 00:25:27,459
I shall not return with any for you, sir,
because it would melt.
410
00:25:27,693 --> 00:25:30,996
Au revoir.
411
00:25:32,232 --> 00:25:35,969
I owe you an apology, Kitty.
I fear you weren't exaggerating after all.
412
00:25:36,237 --> 00:25:38,639
Apology accepted. Thank you, Willie.
413
00:25:38,873 --> 00:25:43,311
Schwenck speaks to the Savoy
every morning in code, Father-in-law...
414
00:25:43,546 --> 00:25:47,016
...just in case the telephone operator
should be eavesdropping.
415
00:25:47,283 --> 00:25:50,420
One might as well open the window
and shout down the street.
416
00:25:50,654 --> 00:25:54,491
- That will be more comfortable for you.
- Sheer waste of time.
417
00:25:54,758 --> 00:25:58,564
It will only result in the further erosion
of the written word.
418
00:25:58,797 --> 00:26:00,630
Would you care to sit down now?
419
00:26:00,865 --> 00:26:04,870
Er... er... thank you.
420
00:26:06,072 --> 00:26:09,876
- Ah, there you are, Pidgeon.
- Ma'am.
421
00:26:10,844 --> 00:26:14,615
I do apologise, sir,
that neither I nor Schwenck was here...
422
00:26:14,882 --> 00:26:17,384
...to welcome you
on your arrival last night.
423
00:26:17,618 --> 00:26:21,356
I do not appreciate being left
upon the doorstep like a hawker.
424
00:26:21,590 --> 00:26:25,762
If you'll only press the electric bell,
Father, you'll be admitted at once.
425
00:26:25,995 --> 00:26:28,397
- Is that not so, Pidgeon?
- Indeed it is, sir.
426
00:26:28,631 --> 00:26:33,336
I have no intention
of placing my life in danger, sir!
427
00:26:33,604 --> 00:26:36,308
How many doorstep deaths
have we had thus far, Pidgeon?
428
00:26:36,541 --> 00:26:38,508
Er, none to my certain knowledge, sir.
429
00:26:38,742 --> 00:26:41,579
There you are, Father.
The odds appear to be in your favour.
430
00:26:41,814 --> 00:26:43,683
- Anything else, sir?
- No, thank you.
431
00:26:43,916 --> 00:26:46,518
Would you tell Mrs Judd
Dr Gilbert will join us for lunch?
432
00:26:46,752 --> 00:26:48,054
Certainly, ma'am.
433
00:26:48,321 --> 00:26:52,258
You know, Father-in-law,
that you are most welcome in our home...
434
00:26:52,525 --> 00:26:53,959
...at any time.
435
00:26:54,194 --> 00:26:58,232
But, please, do try to inform us
of your intention to visit.
436
00:26:58,466 --> 00:27:01,301
A father should not have
to seek permission...
437
00:27:01,536 --> 00:27:03,337
...to visit his own son!
438
00:27:03,605 --> 00:27:06,541
The son shouldn't be expected
to be clairvoyant!
439
00:27:06,776 --> 00:27:10,313
Who does he think I am? Harlequin?
440
00:27:10,547 --> 00:27:13,718
Would you excuse me?
441
00:27:14,218 --> 00:27:18,789
I take it that you will be joining
us for lunch, Father-in-law?
442
00:27:19,023 --> 00:27:24,062
I-I have no idea where
I shall be taking luncheon...
443
00:27:24,296 --> 00:27:26,832
...thank you.
444
00:27:27,067 --> 00:27:31,070
Well, perhaps Schwenck
can persuade you.
445
00:27:32,506 --> 00:27:34,975
Take lunch with us, Father.
446
00:27:35,243 --> 00:27:38,713
We shall enjoy your company.
447
00:27:41,984 --> 00:27:43,786
Am I to understand, sir...
448
00:27:44,020 --> 00:27:46,855
...that you have been
in communication with your mother?
449
00:27:47,124 --> 00:27:50,594
No, Father, not for some
considerable time, I'm glad to say.
450
00:27:50,828 --> 00:27:53,230
You are a liar, sir.
451
00:27:53,464 --> 00:27:54,865
No, sir!
452
00:27:55,099 --> 00:27:57,301
I can assure you, Papa,
that the last person...
453
00:27:57,569 --> 00:27:59,905
...with whom I wish
to have any communication...
454
00:28:00,138 --> 00:28:02,006
...is your estranged wife!
455
00:28:02,241 --> 00:28:05,077
The vicious woman who bore me
into this ridiculous world!
456
00:28:05,311 --> 00:28:08,514
How dare you, sir! Have you no respect?
457
00:28:08,748 --> 00:28:10,549
Don't misunderstand me, Father.
458
00:28:10,784 --> 00:28:13,487
Nobody respects her more than I do,
and I can't stand her.
459
00:28:13,721 --> 00:28:15,389
She is a veritable gorgon!
460
00:28:15,623 --> 00:28:19,027
She is indeed!
And she has chosen her own path.
461
00:28:19,261 --> 00:28:22,265
And in so doing, she has turned
her back on yourself and myself.
462
00:28:22,498 --> 00:28:27,871
And for that small mercy,
we should both of us be eternally grateful.
463
00:28:35,514 --> 00:28:37,514
Those terrors...
464
00:28:37,748 --> 00:28:41,553
...that visit me in the night.
465
00:28:41,787 --> 00:28:43,622
They can never be vanquished.
466
00:28:43,891 --> 00:28:46,960
Ah! Insomnia. I suffer from it myself.
467
00:28:47,193 --> 00:28:49,028
But it is she who sends them.
468
00:28:49,263 --> 00:28:51,832
I know it is she!
469
00:28:52,066 --> 00:28:54,969
I know not what heathen oracle
she consults...
470
00:28:55,203 --> 00:28:59,408
...what filthy familiar she employs.
471
00:28:59,641 --> 00:29:04,581
I know that... they will come.
472
00:29:05,549 --> 00:29:08,252
Wh... Wh... What are these walls?
473
00:29:55,707 --> 00:29:57,141
£5,000?
474
00:29:57,410 --> 00:30:00,746
The last ten shares. Worth every penny.
475
00:30:01,012 --> 00:30:02,748
Trust me, Arthur.
476
00:30:02,982 --> 00:30:06,153
I do, D'Oyly.
477
00:30:06,387 --> 00:30:09,924
- What's this?
- Pull it.
478
00:30:14,363 --> 00:30:16,765
It's a reservoir pen. It contains its own ink.
479
00:30:16,999 --> 00:30:20,036
Good gracious me!
Whatever will they think of next?
480
00:30:20,270 --> 00:30:23,039
Try it.
481
00:30:30,815 --> 00:30:32,884
Now, how long is all this going to take?
482
00:30:33,118 --> 00:30:34,953
Two years.
483
00:30:35,188 --> 00:30:37,723
I shall begin the foundations next month.
484
00:30:37,957 --> 00:30:40,993
Thank you.
485
00:30:42,028 --> 00:30:43,630
To the Savoy Hotel.
486
00:30:43,864 --> 00:30:46,967
The Savoy Hotel.
487
00:30:47,201 --> 00:30:50,103
With its 70 bathrooms.
488
00:30:50,371 --> 00:30:52,373
The builder was much bemused.
489
00:30:52,606 --> 00:30:55,543
"What's the point of 'aving a bathroom
to every bedroom?"
490
00:30:55,811 --> 00:30:57,947
"Who's gonna be staying there?
Amphibians?"
491
00:30:58,213 --> 00:31:01,751
D'Oyly, I can't tell you how delightful
it is to see you here in Paris.
492
00:31:01,985 --> 00:31:05,389
- You're looking much better.
- A new man!
493
00:31:05,655 --> 00:31:08,758
Monte Carlo was most profitable.
494
00:31:08,992 --> 00:31:12,864
Florence was hideously hot.
I sampled the chartreuse at Certosa.
495
00:31:13,131 --> 00:31:15,867
The monks were uncommonly charming.
496
00:31:16,134 --> 00:31:20,806
The train journey through
the St Gotthard Pass is spectacular.
497
00:31:21,041 --> 00:31:23,477
You must go. And Lucerne...
498
00:31:23,711 --> 00:31:25,312
Tranquillity itself.
499
00:31:25,547 --> 00:31:27,415
I walked until I dropped.
500
00:31:27,648 --> 00:31:31,486
Did you receive my letter?
501
00:31:31,586 --> 00:31:33,088
Yes, I did.
502
00:31:33,322 --> 00:31:35,757
Good.
503
00:31:35,992 --> 00:31:38,493
And?
504
00:31:40,229 --> 00:31:42,064
It came to Brussels.
505
00:31:42,333 --> 00:31:44,335
I "sent" it to Brussels, Arthur.
506
00:31:44,568 --> 00:31:48,039
Yes, of course.
507
00:31:48,373 --> 00:31:51,209
Nous sommes prêts.
508
00:32:01,320 --> 00:32:03,523
Vouz avez tué ce pigeon vous-même?
509
00:32:03,758 --> 00:32:07,394
Non, monsieur.Je laisse au bourreau le soin de le faire.
510
00:32:07,628 --> 00:32:10,564
C'est mieux comme ça.
511
00:32:13,936 --> 00:32:17,906
So, what is your position?
512
00:32:20,043 --> 00:32:22,512
Much the same, I'm afraid.
513
00:32:22,779 --> 00:32:25,716
I fully realise, D'Oyly,
that you have me under contract.
514
00:32:25,950 --> 00:32:31,522
But I cannot write
any more operas for the Savoy.
515
00:32:32,458 --> 00:32:36,363
At least, not of that particular character.
516
00:32:37,930 --> 00:32:40,333
I think you should tell Gilbert.
517
00:32:40,567 --> 00:32:44,604
I shall. The moment I return.
518
00:32:44,838 --> 00:32:45,572
Messieurs...
519
00:32:45,807 --> 00:32:46,841
... je vous souhaite bon appétit.
520
00:32:47,075 --> 00:32:50,578
- Merci.- Merci.
521
00:32:54,650 --> 00:32:56,451
♪ The reason is not far to find
522
00:32:56,686 --> 00:32:58,454
♪ When we are near
523
00:32:58,688 --> 00:33:03,526
♪ For though they say that love is blind
524
00:33:03,761 --> 00:33:05,095
♪ Ah, never fear
525
00:33:05,329 --> 00:33:06,964
♪ Ah, ah, ah
526
00:33:07,198 --> 00:33:09,801
♪ We see our destinies entwined
527
00:33:10,034 --> 00:33:12,069
♪ In noonday clear
528
00:33:12,338 --> 00:33:17,577
♪ And love is over all
529
00:33:17,810 --> 00:33:20,447
♪ When shadows fall
530
00:33:20,681 --> 00:33:24,351
♪ And thou art
531
00:33:24,618 --> 00:33:28,556
♪ Here
532
00:33:46,010 --> 00:33:49,180
- Il est bien, Clothilde.
- "Oui, madame." You are a tonic for him.
533
00:33:49,415 --> 00:33:51,249
"Merci." Cherish him.
534
00:33:51,483 --> 00:33:54,352
Of course, "madame".
535
00:33:54,621 --> 00:33:57,024
Oh! Mrs Ronalds.
What an unexpected pleasure.
536
00:33:57,258 --> 00:33:59,092
- Mr Gilbert, how are you?
- How are you?
537
00:33:59,327 --> 00:34:00,927
- Quite well.
- I'm so pleased.
538
00:34:01,160 --> 00:34:03,998
- He's in excellent spirits.
- I look forward to his tales.
539
00:34:04,233 --> 00:34:05,934
- Good day.
- Good day to you.
540
00:34:06,168 --> 00:34:08,002
- Au revoir.- Madame.
541
00:34:08,236 --> 00:34:10,238
- Ça va, Clothilde?- Ça va, monsieur?
542
00:34:10,472 --> 00:34:12,207
- It is hot, no?
- Yes.
543
00:34:12,442 --> 00:34:14,177
- He awaits.
- Thank you.
544
00:34:14,411 --> 00:34:16,245
How was your crossing, Sullivan?
545
00:34:16,478 --> 00:34:18,313
Mercifully smooth, thank you.
546
00:34:18,582 --> 00:34:22,052
As smooth as D'Oyly Carte?
547
00:34:22,319 --> 00:34:24,955
No, not quite, Gilbert!
548
00:34:25,223 --> 00:34:27,058
- Lump sugar?
- Thank you, no.
549
00:34:27,292 --> 00:34:30,395
Oh, please do. I found it in Lucerne.
It's delicious.
550
00:34:30,662 --> 00:34:34,133
If you insist.
551
00:34:35,803 --> 00:34:39,305
- Mmm! Very good.
- Good.
552
00:34:41,375 --> 00:34:44,379
- Is Lucy well?
- Oh, she's in fine fettle.
553
00:34:44,612 --> 00:34:47,415
She sends you her love
and trusts you are in good health.
554
00:34:47,649 --> 00:34:49,518
Thank you. Please reciprocate.
555
00:34:49,785 --> 00:34:51,620
Oh, of course.
556
00:34:51,854 --> 00:34:53,889
Now, what's this Carte's been telling me?
557
00:34:54,123 --> 00:34:55,692
Oh, dear.
558
00:34:55,926 --> 00:34:58,261
- You can't be serious.
- I'm afraid I am.
559
00:34:58,495 --> 00:35:02,699
So you've torn up our contract into tiny
pieces and cast it to the four winds?
560
00:35:02,934 --> 00:35:06,405
- Don't be absurd!
- That would be the implication.
561
00:35:06,639 --> 00:35:08,506
I hardly think so.
562
00:35:08,740 --> 00:35:11,577
What else is one to deduce?
563
00:35:11,812 --> 00:35:13,646
Oh, Gilbert.
564
00:35:13,880 --> 00:35:16,215
There's so much that I have
yet to do for music...
565
00:35:16,449 --> 00:35:18,251
...for my queen, for my country.
566
00:35:18,485 --> 00:35:22,422
Even if God were to grant me two days
for every one I have left on this earth...
567
00:35:22,657 --> 00:35:25,260
...I still should not be able
to achieve everything.
568
00:35:25,493 --> 00:35:28,597
Come, come, Sullivan, you're a genius.
569
00:35:28,865 --> 00:35:30,865
I merely bask in your reflected glory.
570
00:35:31,099 --> 00:35:32,835
Oh, Gilbert, please.
571
00:35:33,103 --> 00:35:38,575
But I'm somewhat at a loss. What is
the precise nature of your dilemma?
572
00:35:38,676 --> 00:35:42,180
How shall I put this?
573
00:35:44,216 --> 00:35:47,852
My tunes, my orchestrations,
are becoming repetitious.
574
00:35:48,087 --> 00:35:51,691
I've rung all the changes possible
in the way of variety of rhythm.
575
00:35:51,924 --> 00:35:53,859
I have such respect for your words...
576
00:35:54,093 --> 00:35:58,465
...that I have continually kept down
my music in order that they can be heard.
577
00:35:58,699 --> 00:36:00,533
It's no more than word-setting.
578
00:36:00,768 --> 00:36:03,839
Sullivan, I have always
subordinated my words to your music.
579
00:36:04,106 --> 00:36:05,841
Oh, I think not.
580
00:36:06,108 --> 00:36:08,843
You've often expatiated
on the thorough good feeling...
581
00:36:09,077 --> 00:36:11,947
...with which we've worked together.
- Unquestionably.
582
00:36:12,181 --> 00:36:16,453
But I want a chance for my music
to act in its own proper sphere.
583
00:36:16,687 --> 00:36:19,056
It does. It always has and it always will.
584
00:36:19,290 --> 00:36:23,561
It must be allowed to intensify the
emotional depth not only of your words...
585
00:36:23,828 --> 00:36:28,802
...but of the situation, which can
be humorous, dramatic... What you will.
586
00:36:29,068 --> 00:36:30,936
Of course. It goes without saying.
587
00:36:31,170 --> 00:36:33,173
You teach me the ABC of my profession.
588
00:36:33,407 --> 00:36:37,243
Now. Would you care for me
to read this to you or not?
589
00:36:37,477 --> 00:36:41,249
- Where is it set?
- In the Sicilian mountains.
590
00:36:41,483 --> 00:36:46,455
Plenty of scope there for Gypsy music,
one might suggest.
591
00:36:46,588 --> 00:36:49,660
Now, the local alchemist
is killed in an explosion...
592
00:36:49,893 --> 00:36:53,863
...and there, amongst his effects,
a chorus of villagers discover a potion.
593
00:36:54,098 --> 00:36:55,600
- Magic, no doubt.
- Indeed.
594
00:36:55,866 --> 00:36:57,467
I thought as much.
595
00:36:57,701 --> 00:37:01,639
The effect of this magic potion is
to transform the character who takes it...
596
00:37:01,906 --> 00:37:04,842
...into whatever he or she
is pretending to be.
597
00:37:05,111 --> 00:37:08,147
- You and your world of Topsy-Turvydom!
598
00:37:08,381 --> 00:37:10,216
In 1881, it was a magic coin.
599
00:37:10,450 --> 00:37:12,753
And before that, it was a magic lozenge.
600
00:37:12,987 --> 00:37:18,125
And in 1877, it was an elixir.
601
00:37:19,026 --> 00:37:20,929
In this instance, it is a magic potion.
602
00:37:21,163 --> 00:37:23,030
"Act One. Scene:
603
00:37:23,265 --> 00:37:25,768
...a mountain inn
on a picturesque Sicilian pass."
604
00:37:26,002 --> 00:37:30,172
"A range of mountains
with Etna in the distance."
605
00:37:42,621 --> 00:37:45,790
- I've made you some beef tea, Mr Gilbert.
- Take it away.
606
00:37:46,025 --> 00:37:48,861
You've not had anything
since yesterday afternoon, sir.
607
00:37:49,095 --> 00:37:52,098
- Take it away.
- You can't work on an empty stomach.
608
00:37:52,333 --> 00:37:55,602
Can't work at all, Mrs Judd,
if I'm being constantly pestered...
609
00:37:55,870 --> 00:37:59,940
...by interfering women with hot beef tea,
cold compresses, mustard poultices...
610
00:38:00,175 --> 00:38:02,577
...and excessive attacks
of philanthropic zeal.
611
00:38:02,811 --> 00:38:05,849
- How's my wounded soldier?
- He's not doing as he's told, madam.
612
00:38:06,116 --> 00:38:07,950
Oh, isn't he now?
613
00:38:08,184 --> 00:38:11,854
Willie, are you intending
to visit the dentist tomorrow?
614
00:38:12,088 --> 00:38:15,458
- You really...
- Oh, for God's sake! You pair of harpies!
615
00:38:15,693 --> 00:38:19,664
Get out! I'm working!
616
00:38:29,909 --> 00:38:33,346
- Willie.
- Madam...
617
00:38:33,447 --> 00:38:37,418
I had rather spend an afternoon
in a Turkish bath with my mother...
618
00:38:37,652 --> 00:38:41,222
...than visit the dratted dentist.
619
00:38:42,892 --> 00:38:45,528
Very well.
620
00:38:45,794 --> 00:38:49,266
Good night!
621
00:38:59,777 --> 00:39:04,249
- She's being just a little bit tricky.
622
00:39:04,851 --> 00:39:08,354
She's coming.
623
00:39:09,623 --> 00:39:11,458
Well done, Mr Gilbert!
624
00:39:11,692 --> 00:39:13,393
Rinse.
625
00:39:13,627 --> 00:39:16,797
She's a beauty.
626
00:39:17,031 --> 00:39:20,502
- Open wide.
- Wh... What?
627
00:39:20,736 --> 00:39:25,207
- Bite... really hard.
628
00:39:26,008 --> 00:39:29,212
I must say, my wife and I
did find "Princess Ida"...
629
00:39:29,446 --> 00:39:31,783
...rather too long, don't you know.
630
00:39:34,085 --> 00:39:36,187
Try not to speak, old chap.
631
00:40:58,050 --> 00:41:00,519
I do hope you've enjoyed your evening...
632
00:41:00,753 --> 00:41:06,992
...but before we say farewell,
may I suggest an impromptu?
633
00:41:07,227 --> 00:41:09,931
Mr Walter Simmonds
has generously offered...
634
00:41:10,198 --> 00:41:13,669
...to accompany me on the harmonium!
635
00:41:17,272 --> 00:41:21,678
Now, we have another very young
hopeful with us this evening...
636
00:41:21,911 --> 00:41:28,385
...who has kindly agreed to accompany us
with a new composition of his own.
637
00:41:28,619 --> 00:41:32,123
The Lost Chord!
638
00:41:38,764 --> 00:41:40,933
Sir Arthur informed me
a few moments ago...
639
00:41:41,201 --> 00:41:44,371
...that he cannot entirely
recall his new piece.
640
00:41:44,637 --> 00:41:48,910
- Merci, madame.
641
00:42:20,814 --> 00:42:24,986
♪ Seated one day at the organ
642
00:42:25,219 --> 00:42:30,190
♪ I was weary and ill at ease
643
00:42:30,424 --> 00:42:35,831
♪ And my fingers wandered idly
644
00:42:36,065 --> 00:42:40,203
♪ Over the noisy keys
645
00:42:40,437 --> 00:42:45,174
♪ I know not what I was playing
646
00:42:45,443 --> 00:42:50,181
♪ Or what I was dreaming then
647
00:42:50,415 --> 00:42:54,954
♪ But I struck one chord of music
648
00:42:55,188 --> 00:43:00,726
♪ Like the sound of a great amen
649
00:43:00,960 --> 00:43:04,064
♪ Like the sound
650
00:43:04,298 --> 00:43:14,509
♪ Of a great amen
651
00:43:22,519 --> 00:43:23,754
It's ridiculous.
652
00:43:23,988 --> 00:43:26,357
It is. I sent him the thing
on Monday of last week.
653
00:43:26,591 --> 00:43:29,927
He could have read it on the same day.
At the very least on Tuesday.
654
00:43:30,161 --> 00:43:32,296
Now ten days have passed
and not a word.
655
00:43:32,564 --> 00:43:35,201
- This concerns me greatly.
- It concerns "me" greatly.
656
00:43:35,434 --> 00:43:38,904
- You'll have to go and see him.
- I'll be buggered if I do any such thing!
657
00:43:39,139 --> 00:43:41,509
I present the man with my idea,
he rejects it...
658
00:43:41,742 --> 00:43:45,578
...I respond in detail to his misgivings
but answer came there none.
659
00:43:45,846 --> 00:43:49,116
Either he hasn't read it,
or he has read it and he doesn't like it.
660
00:43:49,351 --> 00:43:52,687
If he doesn't, he should say so.
At least we shall know where we stand.
661
00:43:52,921 --> 00:43:55,724
- Go and see him.
- No, Carte! You go and see him.
662
00:43:55,959 --> 00:43:59,429
I've no more shots in my locker.
663
00:43:59,796 --> 00:44:01,631
Sullivan & Gilbert! Who are they?
664
00:44:01,865 --> 00:44:04,034
At least we're going to
revive "The Sorcerer".
665
00:44:04,269 --> 00:44:05,903
Only as a stopgap.
666
00:44:06,171 --> 00:44:09,006
- It's breathing space.
- It won't run more than three months.
667
00:44:09,240 --> 00:44:11,577
Your unbounded optimism
is inspiring, Carte.
668
00:44:11,844 --> 00:44:15,948
I have great confidence in "The Sorcerer",
but I'm not in the business of revivals.
669
00:44:16,182 --> 00:44:19,920
You are now. Since you've decided
to withdraw the ailing "Princess Ida"...
670
00:44:20,153 --> 00:44:22,355
...in spite of the cooler weather.
671
00:44:44,381 --> 00:44:47,551
♪ Sprites of earth and air
672
00:44:47,785 --> 00:44:50,989
♪ Fiends of flame and fire
673
00:44:51,224 --> 00:44:54,260
♪ Demon souls come here in shoals
674
00:44:54,526 --> 00:44:58,031
♪ This fearful deed inspire
675
00:44:58,265 --> 00:45:01,268
♪ Appear! Appear!
676
00:45:01,502 --> 00:45:04,639
♪ Appear!
677
00:45:09,612 --> 00:45:14,884
♪ Good master, we are here!
678
00:45:17,955 --> 00:45:20,958
♪ Noisome hags of night
679
00:45:21,192 --> 00:45:24,160
♪ Imps of deadly shade
680
00:45:24,394 --> 00:45:25,996
♪ Pallid ghosts
681
00:45:26,230 --> 00:45:27,665
♪ Arise in hosts
682
00:45:27,933 --> 00:45:30,702
♪ And lend me all your aid
683
00:45:30,970 --> 00:45:32,505
♪ Appear!
684
00:45:32,772 --> 00:45:34,473
♪ Appear!
685
00:45:34,707 --> 00:45:37,676
♪ Appear!
686
00:45:42,684 --> 00:45:47,321
♪ Good master, we are here!
687
00:45:48,423 --> 00:45:50,526
♪ Hark, hark, they assemble
688
00:45:50,760 --> 00:45:52,627
♪ These fiends of the night
689
00:45:52,862 --> 00:45:54,798
♪ Oh, Alexis, I tremble
690
00:45:55,031 --> 00:45:57,133
♪ Seek safety in flight!
691
00:45:57,368 --> 00:45:59,436
♪ Let us fly to a far-off land
692
00:45:59,670 --> 00:46:01,405
♪ Where peace and plenty dwell
693
00:46:01,639 --> 00:46:03,574
♪ Where the sigh of the silver strand
694
00:46:03,808 --> 00:46:05,710
♪ Is echoed in every shell
695
00:46:05,945 --> 00:46:08,112
♪ To the joys that land will give
696
00:46:08,346 --> 00:46:10,015
♪ On the wings of Love we'll fly
697
00:46:10,249 --> 00:46:13,586
♪ In innocence there to live
698
00:46:13,854 --> 00:46:17,791
♪ In innocence there to die
699
00:46:18,025 --> 00:46:21,563
♪ In innocence there to live
700
00:46:21,796 --> 00:46:26,067
♪ There to die
701
00:46:26,334 --> 00:46:28,771
♪ To live and die
702
00:46:29,005 --> 00:46:31,105
♪ Too late, too late
703
00:46:31,374 --> 00:46:33,109
♪ Too late, too late
704
00:46:33,376 --> 00:46:35,111
♪ That may not be!
705
00:46:35,345 --> 00:46:38,281
♪ It may not be
706
00:46:38,516 --> 00:46:39,850
♪ That happy fate
707
00:46:40,084 --> 00:46:42,253
♪ Is not for thee
708
00:46:42,487 --> 00:46:43,888
♪ That happy fate
709
00:46:44,122 --> 00:46:49,829
♪ Is not for thee
710
00:46:51,164 --> 00:46:54,234
♪ Now, shrivelled hags with poison bags
711
00:46:54,468 --> 00:46:57,805
♪ Discharge your loathsome loads
712
00:46:58,039 --> 00:47:01,007
♪ Spit flame and fire, unholy choir
713
00:47:01,242 --> 00:47:04,279
♪ Belch forth your venom, toads
714
00:47:04,513 --> 00:47:08,017
♪ Ye demons fell with yelp and yell
715
00:47:08,250 --> 00:47:10,953
♪ Shed curses far afield
716
00:47:11,187 --> 00:47:15,091
♪ Ye fiends of night, your filthy blight
717
00:47:15,325 --> 00:47:19,897
♪ In noisome plenty yield
718
00:47:20,131 --> 00:47:22,565
Number one!
719
00:47:22,800 --> 00:47:25,404
♪ It is done!
720
00:47:25,638 --> 00:47:28,440
Number two.
721
00:47:28,674 --> 00:47:30,643
♪ One too few!
722
00:47:30,877 --> 00:47:34,714
Number three!
723
00:47:36,550 --> 00:47:39,253
♪ Set us free! Set us free!
Our work is done
724
00:47:39,487 --> 00:47:40,588
♪ Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!
725
00:47:40,856 --> 00:47:45,527
♪ Ha ha ha haa!
726
00:47:46,362 --> 00:47:48,798
♪ Let us fly to a far-off land
727
00:47:49,032 --> 00:47:50,567
♪ Where peace and plenty dwell
728
00:47:50,800 --> 00:47:52,434
♪ Too late, too late
729
00:47:52,669 --> 00:47:56,307
♪ Let us fly where the silver strand
is echoed in every shell
730
00:47:56,574 --> 00:47:58,408
♪ Too late, too late
731
00:47:58,643 --> 00:47:59,977
♪ Let us fly! Let us fly!
732
00:48:00,211 --> 00:48:01,813
♪ That happy fate
733
00:48:02,047 --> 00:48:07,653
♪ Let us fly! Let us fly!
734
00:48:13,661 --> 00:48:17,131
- How many today, Jessie?
- Only nine, alas!
735
00:48:17,365 --> 00:48:20,135
"Oh, alas!"
736
00:48:20,369 --> 00:48:23,237
I have received none today.
737
00:48:23,471 --> 00:48:25,407
I'm utterly neglected.
738
00:48:25,641 --> 00:48:27,476
Have these, you poor soul!
739
00:48:27,710 --> 00:48:31,881
I don't want your scraps, Jessie Bond.
740
00:48:32,115 --> 00:48:35,119
Too vigorous, Emily. Apply the bandage.
741
00:48:35,353 --> 00:48:38,889
Beg your pardon, Miss Bond.
742
00:48:39,457 --> 00:48:43,362
- Shall I ever find anybody again?
- Don't be so gloomy, Leonora.
743
00:48:43,596 --> 00:48:48,434
Sadly, I seem to appeal
only to elderly gentlemen.
744
00:48:48,702 --> 00:48:51,538
Where are my young bucks and blades?
Quel dommage!
745
00:48:51,772 --> 00:48:53,807
I've told you what you must do.
746
00:48:54,041 --> 00:48:57,612
The last thing a girl wants
after an evening's performance...
747
00:48:57,846 --> 00:49:01,216
...is to have to go and sing
all night for London society.
748
00:49:01,450 --> 00:49:04,419
Idle ladies and their odious husbands.
749
00:49:04,653 --> 00:49:06,322
One has to sing for one's supper.
750
00:49:06,555 --> 00:49:08,757
It's damned exhausting. I detest it.
751
00:49:08,991 --> 00:49:10,860
Anyway, they're not all married.
752
00:49:11,095 --> 00:49:13,364
And some of them
are rather cute and courteous.
753
00:49:13,597 --> 00:49:15,732
You have them dangling
on a leash, Jessie.
754
00:49:15,967 --> 00:49:20,338
One must keep oneself amused,
don't you know?
755
00:49:22,574 --> 00:49:25,277
So terribly trying.
756
00:49:25,511 --> 00:49:28,281
When I meet a gentleman,
he invites me to supper.
757
00:49:28,515 --> 00:49:31,049
I mention my little... secret...
758
00:49:31,284 --> 00:49:33,153
...and then he's off, quick smart.
759
00:49:33,420 --> 00:49:35,255
C'est impossible!
760
00:49:35,490 --> 00:49:37,191
You shouldn't reveal your secret...
761
00:49:37,458 --> 00:49:40,061
...until he's fallen in love
with you and has proposed!
762
00:49:40,296 --> 00:49:42,063
Oh, Jessie, for goodness' sake!
763
00:49:42,298 --> 00:49:44,967
By the by, "monsieur",
you do realise I have a little boy?
764
00:49:45,201 --> 00:49:49,006
I couldn't possibly pretend
that Stanton doesn't exist. No.
765
00:49:49,239 --> 00:49:51,541
No, he's my precious little bundle.
766
00:49:51,775 --> 00:49:54,211
- How's his toothache?
- Earache.
767
00:49:54,445 --> 00:49:56,447
He suffers terribly, poor mite.
768
00:49:56,681 --> 00:50:00,618
- Shall I lace you up now, Miss Bond?
- Of course, Emily.
769
00:50:00,853 --> 00:50:03,321
Surely your Mr Barnes would be willing?
770
00:50:03,555 --> 00:50:06,326
Mr Baker. Jessie, please!
771
00:50:06,559 --> 00:50:09,696
I do not intend
to become a widow again before I'm 50.
772
00:50:09,930 --> 00:50:13,434
No. Neither do I.
773
00:50:13,568 --> 00:50:17,806
♪ No doubt, yet spite of all your pains
774
00:50:18,040 --> 00:50:21,410
♪ The interesting fact remains
775
00:50:21,643 --> 00:50:23,145
- Come in.
776
00:50:23,379 --> 00:50:26,115
♪... a little boy
777
00:50:26,383 --> 00:50:31,120
♪ He was a little boy
778
00:50:31,355 --> 00:50:32,823
Five minutes, Miss Braham.
779
00:50:33,056 --> 00:50:36,694
- Thank you, Shrimp.
- Pleasure, miss.
780
00:50:41,835 --> 00:50:45,104
♪ But soft, they waken one by one
781
00:50:45,338 --> 00:50:46,840
♪ The spell has worked
782
00:50:47,107 --> 00:50:49,276
♪ The deed is done
783
00:50:49,543 --> 00:50:53,347
♪ I would suggest that we retire
784
00:50:53,581 --> 00:50:56,417
♪ While Love, the housemaid
785
00:50:56,651 --> 00:51:00,922
♪ Lights her kitchen fire
786
00:51:01,156 --> 00:51:04,126
♪ While Love, the housemaid
787
00:51:04,361 --> 00:51:09,866
♪ Lights her kitchen fire
788
00:51:26,453 --> 00:51:27,520
♪ Why
789
00:51:27,788 --> 00:51:28,889
♪ Where be oi
790
00:51:29,122 --> 00:51:31,858
♪ And what be oi a-doin'
791
00:51:32,092 --> 00:51:35,130
♪ A-sleepin' out just when
792
00:51:35,364 --> 00:51:38,499
♪ The dew do rise?
793
00:51:38,733 --> 00:51:43,972
♪ Why, that's the very way
your 'ealth to ruin
794
00:51:44,207 --> 00:51:50,080
♪ And don't seem
quite respectable likewise
795
00:51:50,348 --> 00:51:52,682
♪ 'Ey, that's you
796
00:51:52,917 --> 00:51:55,186
♪ Only think of that now
797
00:51:55,421 --> 00:51:58,825
♪ What may you be at now?
798
00:51:59,057 --> 00:52:02,527
♪ Tell me do
799
00:52:05,799 --> 00:52:08,535
♪ 'Ey, what a nose
800
00:52:08,769 --> 00:52:10,971
♪ And oh, what eyes, miss
801
00:52:11,206 --> 00:52:13,775
♪ Lips like a rose
802
00:52:14,008 --> 00:52:16,143
♪ And cheeks likewise, miss
803
00:52:16,378 --> 00:52:18,546
♪ Oi'll tell you true
804
00:52:18,780 --> 00:52:21,283
♪ Which I never done, sir
805
00:52:21,550 --> 00:52:23,686
♪ Oi like you
806
00:52:23,920 --> 00:52:28,126
♪ As oi never liked none, sir.
807
00:52:30,528 --> 00:52:33,064
♪ 'Ey, but I do
808
00:52:33,297 --> 00:52:39,004
♪ Like you
809
00:53:07,304 --> 00:53:09,406
- Morning, Carte.
- Good morning, Gilbert.
810
00:53:09,640 --> 00:53:10,908
- Cigar?
- Thank you.
811
00:53:11,142 --> 00:53:13,011
- Gilbert.
- Sullivan. May I?
812
00:53:13,245 --> 00:53:14,645
- Certainly.
- Morning, D'Oyly.
813
00:53:14,914 --> 00:53:16,883
- Good morning, Miss Lenoir.
- Good morning.
814
00:53:17,149 --> 00:53:20,621
Good day, Helen.
815
00:53:22,455 --> 00:53:24,725
Now, gentlemen.
We all know why we're here.
816
00:53:24,992 --> 00:53:27,862
We seem to have come
to something of a standstill.
817
00:53:28,096 --> 00:53:31,899
- Indeed we have.
- Which, Arthur, is because...
818
00:53:32,133 --> 00:53:33,368
Oh.
819
00:53:33,602 --> 00:53:35,070
Because, Helen...
820
00:53:35,304 --> 00:53:38,973
...I am unable to set the piece
that Gilbert persists in presenting.
821
00:53:39,208 --> 00:53:42,980
The piece I persist in presenting
is substantially altered each time.
822
00:53:43,213 --> 00:53:46,216
Otherwise there'd be little point
in my presenting it to you.
823
00:53:46,450 --> 00:53:49,620
With respect, old chap,
it is not substantially altered at all.
824
00:53:49,854 --> 00:53:52,823
You seem merely to have grafted
on to the first act...
825
00:53:53,058 --> 00:53:56,395
...the tantalising suggestion
that we are to be in the realms of...
826
00:53:56,629 --> 00:53:58,497
...human emotion and probability...
827
00:53:58,732 --> 00:54:03,469
...only to disappoint us by reverting to
your familiar world of Topsy-Turvydom.
828
00:54:03,703 --> 00:54:07,674
That which I have grafted on to Act One,
Sullivan, has been at your request.
829
00:54:07,908 --> 00:54:10,244
But if you take exception
to Topsy-Turvydom...
830
00:54:10,512 --> 00:54:13,781
...you take exception to a great deal
of my work of the past 25 years.
831
00:54:14,015 --> 00:54:17,487
Not to mention much of what you and I
have written together since 1871.
832
00:54:17,753 --> 00:54:19,588
- That is patent balderdash!
- Is it?
833
00:54:19,823 --> 00:54:23,293
Gentlemen, if we might keep things
cordial, we may make some progress.
834
00:54:23,526 --> 00:54:27,097
Arthur, can you really not see
your way to setting this new piece?
835
00:54:27,332 --> 00:54:30,935
- Alas, Helen, I cannot.
- Cannot or will not?
836
00:54:31,169 --> 00:54:35,107
I am truly unable to set any piece
that is so profoundly uncongenial to me.
837
00:54:35,341 --> 00:54:37,409
Uncongenial though it may be to you...
838
00:54:37,676 --> 00:54:40,613
...I must remind you that we here
are conducting a business.
839
00:54:40,848 --> 00:54:43,184
May I remind you, Helen,
that I am not a machine.
840
00:54:43,418 --> 00:54:45,853
I would not suggest for one moment
that you were.
841
00:54:46,087 --> 00:54:48,423
You all seem to be treating me
as a barrel organ.
842
00:54:48,657 --> 00:54:50,226
You have but to turn my handle...
843
00:54:50,459 --> 00:54:52,861
...and out pops a tune!
- That's not strictly true.
844
00:54:53,095 --> 00:54:55,230
- Arthur.
- Come now, that's unfair.
845
00:54:55,465 --> 00:54:59,035
You are both contractually obliged
to supply a new work on request.
846
00:54:59,269 --> 00:55:03,874
The very act of signing a joint contract
dictates that we must be businesslike.
847
00:55:04,108 --> 00:55:05,943
Yes, Mr Gilbert.
848
00:55:06,178 --> 00:55:10,415
And I was wondering whether "you" might
be able to solve our wee difficulty.
849
00:55:10,649 --> 00:55:15,086
- How, pray?
- By simply writing another libretto.
850
00:55:17,791 --> 00:55:21,895
It's out of the question. I have worked
for many long months at this play...
851
00:55:22,129 --> 00:55:26,367
...which I have every confidence will be
the best we have produced at the Savoy.
852
00:55:26,634 --> 00:55:29,069
To abandon it would be
both criminal and wasteful.
853
00:55:29,304 --> 00:55:30,238
I see.
854
00:55:30,472 --> 00:55:34,076
Had the complaint been lodged earlier,
that might have been different.
855
00:55:34,310 --> 00:55:36,279
I did so when you presented the libretto.
856
00:55:36,512 --> 00:55:38,849
I was unable to present you
with the libretto...
857
00:55:39,115 --> 00:55:41,218
...until you returned from your grand tour!
858
00:55:41,452 --> 00:55:44,353
- That is neither here nor there.
- No, Sullivan. Indeed.
859
00:55:44,588 --> 00:55:47,592
I was here and you were there. Ha!
860
00:55:47,826 --> 00:55:49,728
What I don't understand, Arthur...
861
00:55:49,995 --> 00:55:51,829
...is why you cannot set this piece.
862
00:55:52,064 --> 00:55:54,834
You're our greatest composer.
Surely you can do anything?
863
00:55:55,068 --> 00:55:56,903
How very kind you are, Helen.
864
00:55:57,137 --> 00:56:00,039
But I say again to you all,
I am at the end of my tether.
865
00:56:00,274 --> 00:56:03,811
I have been repeating myself in this...
class of work for too long...
866
00:56:04,079 --> 00:56:06,580
...and I will not continue so to do.
867
00:56:06,814 --> 00:56:09,384
Neither of us runs any risk
of repeating himself.
868
00:56:09,618 --> 00:56:12,454
This is an entirely new story,
quite unlike any other.
869
00:56:12,689 --> 00:56:14,823
It's markedly similar to "The Sorcerer".
870
00:56:15,057 --> 00:56:17,160
People say we're repeating ourselves.
871
00:56:17,394 --> 00:56:19,229
How is it similar to "The Sorcerer"?
872
00:56:19,464 --> 00:56:21,398
Obviously both involve characters...
873
00:56:21,632 --> 00:56:24,167
...who are transformed
by the taking of a magic potion.
874
00:56:24,435 --> 00:56:27,672
A device which I continue to find
utterly contrived.
875
00:56:27,906 --> 00:56:31,075
Every theatrical performance is
a contrivance by its very nature.
876
00:56:31,310 --> 00:56:37,016
Yes, but this piece consists entirely
of an artificial and implausible situation.
877
00:56:37,250 --> 00:56:40,454
If you wish to write a grand opera
about a prostitute...
878
00:56:40,722 --> 00:56:42,757
...dying of consumption in a garret...
879
00:56:42,991 --> 00:56:45,159
...I suggest you contact Mr lbsen in Oslo.
880
00:56:45,393 --> 00:56:48,296
I'm sure he can furnish you
with something suitably dull.
881
00:56:48,531 --> 00:56:51,200
- Gilbert, please.
- Hmm?
882
00:56:51,433 --> 00:56:53,536
I do beg your pardon, Miss Lenoir.
883
00:56:53,803 --> 00:56:55,104
Oh, no. Granted.
884
00:56:55,338 --> 00:56:59,276
The opportunity to treat a situation
of tender, human and dramatic interest...
885
00:56:59,510 --> 00:57:02,146
...is one I long for
more than anything else in the world.
886
00:57:02,379 --> 00:57:06,617
If that is your sincere desire, I would
be willing, with Carte's permission...
887
00:57:06,851 --> 00:57:09,855
...to withdraw my services
whilst you write a grand opera...
888
00:57:10,123 --> 00:57:12,691
...with a collaborator
with whom you have more affinity.
889
00:57:12,959 --> 00:57:14,860
- No, Gilbert.
- I'm in earnest, Sullivan.
890
00:57:15,094 --> 00:57:17,397
No doubt we shall be pursuing that
in the future.
891
00:57:17,631 --> 00:57:20,669
Indeed.
892
00:57:20,902 --> 00:57:23,036
Well, that is your prerogative, Carte.
893
00:57:23,271 --> 00:57:27,076
However, we are concerned
with the present.
894
00:57:27,310 --> 00:57:33,216
Arthur. Will you or will you not set
Mr Gilbert's new and original work?
895
00:57:33,483 --> 00:57:36,153
Ma belle Héléne: Ce n'est pas possible.
896
00:57:36,386 --> 00:57:38,554
Truly?
897
00:57:38,788 --> 00:57:41,892
I'm afraid so.
898
00:57:42,027 --> 00:57:44,428
That being the case... Mr Gilbert...
899
00:57:44,662 --> 00:57:47,932
Am I right to suppose that
you remain unable to accommodate us?
900
00:57:48,201 --> 00:57:50,036
Indeed, Miss Lenoir.
901
00:57:50,270 --> 00:57:52,238
I have had what I deem
to be a good idea...
902
00:57:52,472 --> 00:57:55,775
...and such ideas are not three a penny.
903
00:57:56,043 --> 00:57:57,845
What a pity.
904
00:57:58,079 --> 00:58:02,917
This will be a very sad day
for many thousands of people.
905
00:58:03,151 --> 00:58:05,754
Well, gentlemen, I don't know about you...
906
00:58:05,988 --> 00:58:10,560
...but speaking for myself,
I could murder a pork chop.
907
00:58:16,667 --> 00:58:20,538
If you'll excuse me, I shall retrieve my hat.
908
00:58:36,923 --> 00:58:39,126
- Gilbert.
- Sullivan.
909
00:58:39,361 --> 00:58:41,195
Good day to you both.
910
00:58:41,430 --> 00:58:44,265
No doubt we shall be in communication
in the near future.
911
00:58:44,499 --> 00:58:48,237
- Good day, Mr Gilbert.
- Good day.
912
00:58:55,980 --> 00:58:57,815
You know where to find me.
913
00:58:58,083 --> 00:59:01,152
Arthur.
914
00:59:12,699 --> 00:59:14,567
- Where have you been?
- Shopping.
915
00:59:14,802 --> 00:59:16,036
Surprising(!)
916
00:59:16,269 --> 00:59:18,606
I was in Knightsbridge...
and guess what I saw?
917
00:59:18,840 --> 00:59:20,675
An elephant gilding two lilies.
918
00:59:20,910 --> 00:59:22,744
- No.
- I have no idea.
919
00:59:22,978 --> 00:59:25,380
Three tiny Japanese ladies!
920
00:59:25,648 --> 00:59:29,418
- How do you know they were Japanese?
- They had on their funny dressing gowns.
921
00:59:29,685 --> 00:59:30,685
Had they just got up?
922
00:59:30,920 --> 00:59:33,056
No, there's a Japanese exhibition
at Humphreys' Hall.
923
00:59:33,323 --> 00:59:35,525
Oh, yes. Japanese village of some sort.
924
00:59:35,760 --> 00:59:38,462
Yes! Yes, sounds rather intriguing.
Might we visit?
925
00:59:38,696 --> 00:59:42,168
- No.
- But the whole of London will be going!
926
00:59:42,401 --> 00:59:44,869
- Precisely!
- Don't be so stubborn!
927
00:59:45,104 --> 00:59:47,506
I have other things on my mind,
you know that!
928
00:59:47,740 --> 00:59:49,743
Yes, I do know that and I understand...
929
00:59:50,010 --> 00:59:52,177
...but a little distraction will do you good.
930
00:59:52,445 --> 00:59:55,748
- Kitty, I don't want to be distracted.
- Yes, you do.
931
00:59:55,983 --> 00:59:58,587
Oh, do I? You know my mind
better than I do, do you?
932
00:59:58,819 --> 01:00:00,721
I know you better than you think I do.
933
01:00:00,956 --> 01:00:04,226
Lucy, if you wish to visit Humphreys' Hall,
by all means do so...
934
01:00:04,461 --> 01:00:09,700
...but I shall not accompany you
for all the tea in China.
935
01:00:41,269 --> 01:00:43,104
What are you writing, sir?
936
01:01:39,104 --> 01:01:41,239
- Good afternoon, Lucy.
- Maude!
937
01:01:41,473 --> 01:01:43,308
Good heavens! What are you doing here?
938
01:01:43,543 --> 01:01:46,546
- How are you, Schwenck?
- How jolly! You must join us.
939
01:01:46,813 --> 01:01:48,715
Unfortunately, we're about to leave.
940
01:01:48,949 --> 01:01:51,051
- Oh, what a pity.
- What do you make of it all?
941
01:01:51,285 --> 01:01:53,287
- It's entrancing.
- It's frightful.
942
01:01:55,724 --> 01:01:57,559
- How's Mother?
- Quite well.
943
01:01:57,793 --> 01:01:58,993
She's in bed.
944
01:01:59,227 --> 01:02:00,428
Come along, Maude.
945
01:02:00,662 --> 01:02:03,399
- We mustn't keep you. Good day to you.
- Give her my best.
946
01:02:03,633 --> 01:02:04,567
Of course.
947
01:02:04,801 --> 01:02:07,103
- Well... "au revoir".
- Good day, Maude.
948
01:02:07,371 --> 01:02:11,242
Au revoir.
949
01:02:26,526 --> 01:02:29,796
- My goodness!
- Mmm.
950
01:02:30,030 --> 01:02:32,633
Perfectly green.
951
01:02:32,867 --> 01:02:36,804
- Spinach water.
- Oh, Willie!
952
01:02:37,573 --> 01:02:39,374
Thank you very much.
953
01:02:39,608 --> 01:02:41,577
Shikuspen, prease.
954
01:02:41,812 --> 01:02:45,147
- I beg your pardon?
- Shikuspen, prease.
955
01:02:45,415 --> 01:02:47,117
- She speaks English!
- What did she say?
956
01:02:47,351 --> 01:02:49,687
She said, "Sixpence, please"!
957
01:02:49,921 --> 01:02:53,957
- Shikuspence, prease.
- Oh, sixpence!
958
01:02:54,092 --> 01:02:58,230
- Thank you very much.
- Arigato gozaimasu.
959
01:02:58,498 --> 01:03:01,200
Shixpence, prease.
960
01:04:31,573 --> 01:04:34,042
Here we are, sir.
961
01:04:34,276 --> 01:04:37,913
- There, Pidgeon.
- Very good, sir.
962
01:04:39,616 --> 01:04:41,451
Comme ça.
963
01:04:41,685 --> 01:04:45,055
Yes, sir.
964
01:04:45,154 --> 01:04:48,659
Show it to me.
965
01:04:54,366 --> 01:04:57,336
To your right.
966
01:04:57,571 --> 01:05:01,141
More... Good. Down a bit.
967
01:05:01,375 --> 01:05:03,777
Down a bit... There.
968
01:05:04,011 --> 01:05:07,715
- Mark it there.
- Yes, sir.
969
01:05:07,981 --> 01:05:10,017
- Give it to me.
- Thank you, sir.
970
01:05:10,252 --> 01:05:12,521
That's a fine-looking instrument, sir.
971
01:05:12,754 --> 01:05:14,856
Now, would that be Spanish or Italian?
972
01:05:15,091 --> 01:05:19,663
- Neither, Pidgeon.
- Er, of course, sir.
973
01:05:34,113 --> 01:05:37,082
- Excellent! Thank you.
- Thank you, sir.
974
01:06:40,358 --> 01:06:44,929
Do we suppose that Lucy is... with child?
975
01:06:45,163 --> 01:06:48,600
- I beg your pardon, Mama?
- Lucy.
976
01:06:48,867 --> 01:06:52,203
Is she "enceinte"? With child?
977
01:06:52,437 --> 01:06:54,239
Why ever would you think that?
978
01:06:54,507 --> 01:06:56,843
One wouldn't have said she was sickly.
979
01:06:57,077 --> 01:07:02,016
Although... she did ask after "you", Mama.
980
01:07:10,092 --> 01:07:11,559
What did he say?
981
01:07:11,827 --> 01:07:14,864
- Who?
- Schwenck!
982
01:07:15,098 --> 01:07:17,200
He said nothing, Mama! Nothing!
983
01:07:17,467 --> 01:07:21,136
Nothing! Absolutely nothing!
984
01:07:26,745 --> 01:07:28,579
Your dear son said very little.
985
01:07:28,814 --> 01:07:33,887
And what he did say,
I have already told you.
986
01:07:34,020 --> 01:07:35,455
Now...
987
01:07:35,689 --> 01:07:39,159
Do you care for this or not?
988
01:07:39,426 --> 01:07:42,729
It is merely a piece of wood.
989
01:07:42,964 --> 01:07:47,569
Very well. I shall keep it for my collection.
990
01:07:48,503 --> 01:07:52,207
- Maude!
- Yes, Mama?
991
01:07:52,341 --> 01:07:56,647
Never bear a humorous baby.
992
01:07:56,881 --> 01:08:00,550
I shall endeavour not to, Mama.
993
01:09:52,715 --> 01:09:55,786
♪ Behold the Lord High Executioner
994
01:09:56,020 --> 01:09:59,122
♪ A personage of noble rank and title
995
01:09:59,390 --> 01:10:02,927
♪ A dignified and potent officer
996
01:10:03,195 --> 01:10:06,831
♪ Whose functions are particularly vital
997
01:10:07,066 --> 01:10:09,902
♪ Defer! Defer!
998
01:10:10,137 --> 01:10:13,273
♪ To the Lord High Executioner
999
01:10:13,506 --> 01:10:16,910
♪ Defer! Defer!
1000
01:10:17,144 --> 01:10:20,448
♪ To the noble Lord, to the noble Lord
1001
01:10:20,715 --> 01:10:25,754
♪ To the Lord High Executioner
1002
01:10:26,689 --> 01:10:29,859
♪ Taken from the county jail
1003
01:10:30,092 --> 01:10:33,630
♪ By a set of curious chances
1004
01:10:33,864 --> 01:10:37,467
♪ Liberated then on bail
1005
01:10:37,702 --> 01:10:41,206
♪ On my own recognisances
1006
01:10:41,473 --> 01:10:45,010
♪ Wafted by a favouring gale
1007
01:10:45,277 --> 01:10:48,781
♪ As one sometimes is in trances
1008
01:10:49,015 --> 01:10:52,552
♪ To a height that few can scale
1009
01:10:52,786 --> 01:10:56,290
♪ Save by long and weary dances
1010
01:10:56,557 --> 01:11:00,261
♪ Surely never had a male
1011
01:11:00,496 --> 01:11:03,732
♪ Under suchlike circumstances
1012
01:11:03,966 --> 01:11:07,102
♪ So adventurous a tale
1013
01:11:07,336 --> 01:11:11,942
♪ Which may rank with most romances
1014
01:11:12,176 --> 01:11:16,313
♪ Taken from the county jail
1015
01:11:16,547 --> 01:11:19,251
♪ By a set of curious chances
1016
01:11:19,518 --> 01:11:22,854
♪ Surely never had a male
1017
01:11:23,088 --> 01:11:26,758
♪ So adventurous a tale
1018
01:11:26,993 --> 01:11:29,095
"The Mikado, or the town of Titipu."
1019
01:11:29,329 --> 01:11:30,931
"Act One."
1020
01:11:31,197 --> 01:11:33,667
"Scene: Courtyard of
Ko-Ko's palace in Titipu."
1021
01:11:33,901 --> 01:11:36,570
"Japanese nobles discovered
standing and sitting...
1022
01:11:36,837 --> 01:11:39,174
...in attitudes suggested
by native drawings."
1023
01:11:39,408 --> 01:11:43,112
"Chorus: 'If you want to know who we are
We're gentlemen of Japan.'"
1024
01:11:43,345 --> 01:11:45,647
"'On many a vase and jar,
on many a screen and fan
1025
01:11:45,915 --> 01:11:48,952
we figure in lively paint,
our attitudes queer and quaint.'"
1026
01:11:49,186 --> 01:11:51,020
"'You're wrong if you think it ain't.'"
1027
01:11:51,255 --> 01:11:54,992
"'If you think we are worked by strings
like a Japanese marionette,
1028
01:11:55,225 --> 01:11:57,262
you don't understand these things -
1029
01:11:57,496 --> 01:11:59,263
it's simply Court etiquette.'"
1030
01:11:59,498 --> 01:12:02,635
"'Perhaps you suppose this throng
can't keep it up all day long.'"
1031
01:12:02,869 --> 01:12:04,904
"'If that's your idea, you're wrong.'"
1032
01:12:05,138 --> 01:12:07,107
"Enter Nanki-Poo, in great excitement."
1033
01:12:07,340 --> 01:12:11,411
"He carries a native guitar on his back
and a bundle of ballads in his hand."
1034
01:12:11,679 --> 01:12:13,313
"Recitative, Nanki-Poo."
1035
01:12:13,546 --> 01:12:15,282
"'Gentlemen, I pray you, tell me...
1036
01:12:15,517 --> 01:12:18,921
...where a lovely maiden dwelleth
named Yum-Yum, the ward of Ko-Ko.'"
1037
01:12:19,154 --> 01:12:21,188
"'In pity speak, oh, speak, I pray you.'"
1038
01:12:21,422 --> 01:12:24,259
"'I hurried back at once
in the hope of finding Yum-Yum...
1039
01:12:24,494 --> 01:12:26,796
...at liberty to listen to my protestations.'"
1040
01:12:27,030 --> 01:12:30,902
"Pish-Tush: 'It is true that Ko-Ko
was condemned to death for flirting...
1041
01:12:31,135 --> 01:12:33,704
...but he was reprieved
at the last moment...
1042
01:12:33,938 --> 01:12:37,441
...and raised to the exalted rank
of Lord High Executioner...
1043
01:12:37,675 --> 01:12:40,713
...under the following
remarkable circumstances.'"
1044
01:12:40,947 --> 01:12:42,782
"Song, Pish-Tush."
1045
01:12:43,016 --> 01:12:45,418
"'Our great Mikado, virtuous man,
1046
01:12:45,652 --> 01:12:47,419
When he to rule our land began
1047
01:12:47,654 --> 01:12:49,957
Resolved to try a plan whereby
1048
01:12:50,190 --> 01:12:52,692
Young men might best be steadied.'"
1049
01:12:52,960 --> 01:12:55,029
"'So he decreed in words succinct
1050
01:12:55,263 --> 01:12:57,466
That all who flirted, leered or winked
1051
01:12:57,700 --> 01:12:59,701
Unless connubially linked
1052
01:12:59,935 --> 01:13:01,804
Should forthwith be beheaded.'"
1053
01:13:02,037 --> 01:13:05,475
"'And I expect you'll all agree
That he was right to so decree.'"
1054
01:13:05,709 --> 01:13:07,476
"'And I am right, and you are right,
1055
01:13:07,710 --> 01:13:10,314
And all is right as right can be.'"
1056
01:13:10,548 --> 01:13:12,683
"'This stern decree, you'll understand,
1057
01:13:12,917 --> 01:13:15,185
Caused great dismay
throughout the land,
1058
01:13:15,419 --> 01:13:17,655
For young and old and shy and bold
1059
01:13:17,924 --> 01:13:19,792
Were equally affected.'"
1060
01:13:20,025 --> 01:13:21,859
"'The youth who winked a roving eye
1061
01:13:22,094 --> 01:13:24,563
Or breathed a non-connubial sigh
1062
01:13:24,797 --> 01:13:28,268
Was thereupon condemned to die.'"
1063
01:13:28,501 --> 01:13:30,336
"'He usually objected.'"
1064
01:13:30,605 --> 01:13:33,908
"'And you'll allow, as I expect,
That he was right to so object,
1065
01:13:34,142 --> 01:13:36,043
And I am right, and you are right
1066
01:13:36,277 --> 01:13:38,112
And everything is quite correct.'"
1067
01:13:38,346 --> 01:13:40,481
"'And so we straight let out on bail
1068
01:13:40,716 --> 01:13:42,685
A convict from the county jail
1069
01:13:42,920 --> 01:13:46,857
Whose head was next on some pretext,
Condemn-ed to be mown off,
1070
01:13:47,124 --> 01:13:49,260
And made him Headsman, for we said:
1071
01:13:49,494 --> 01:13:51,561
Who's next to be decapit-ed
1072
01:13:51,796 --> 01:13:55,768
Cannot cut off another's head
Until he's cut his own off.'"
1073
01:13:56,002 --> 01:13:59,405
"'And we are right, I think you'll say,
To argue in this kind of way,
1074
01:13:59,638 --> 01:14:01,473
And I am right, and you are right,
1075
01:14:01,708 --> 01:14:03,543
And all is right - too-loorallay!'"
1076
01:14:03,778 --> 01:14:06,713
"Chorus. End of song."
1077
01:14:06,947 --> 01:14:08,748
Highly amusing, Willie.
1078
01:14:08,983 --> 01:14:11,519
- Fatuous.
- Oh.
1079
01:14:11,753 --> 01:14:13,755
Surely Arthur likes it?
1080
01:14:13,988 --> 01:14:17,726
He hasn't said otherwise.
1081
01:14:17,826 --> 01:14:21,863
It certainly is rich
in human emotion and probability.
1082
01:14:22,098 --> 01:14:24,935
Hardly.
1083
01:14:25,903 --> 01:14:27,872
"Enter Pooh-Bah."
1084
01:14:51,699 --> 01:14:53,467
- It's a tragedy.
- It is.
1085
01:14:53,701 --> 01:14:54,802
Che bruto.
1086
01:14:55,037 --> 01:14:58,474
Absolutely. He simply hasn't
played with a straight bat.
1087
01:14:58,708 --> 01:15:00,442
- Who's that?
- His Majesty the Mahdi.
1088
01:15:00,676 --> 01:15:02,645
- Oh, yes.
- No, it just isn't cricket.
1089
01:15:02,879 --> 01:15:06,916
Quite so. It's completely contrary
to the rules of engagement.
1090
01:15:07,150 --> 01:15:10,187
The man was surrounded on all sides
and massacred mercilessly.
1091
01:15:10,421 --> 01:15:13,524
"What full fortune
doth the thick lips owe."
1092
01:15:13,758 --> 01:15:16,862
- What does that mean?
- Philistine.
1093
01:15:17,130 --> 01:15:19,565
It baffles me that you're baffled,
Barrington.
1094
01:15:19,799 --> 01:15:23,002
The Hottentot in the desert
doesn't play cricket.
1095
01:15:23,236 --> 01:15:26,406
His natural habitation
being the jungly-bungly tree...
1096
01:15:26,641 --> 01:15:29,944
...he is as yet hardly able
to walk upright, don't you know?
1097
01:15:30,178 --> 01:15:33,181
We strive to bring them civilisation...
1098
01:15:33,449 --> 01:15:36,985
...and this is their gratitude.
1099
01:15:38,187 --> 01:15:42,258
Did you know that 56 families were
slaughtered on the Island of Skye?
1100
01:15:42,526 --> 01:15:46,029
- Really? When was that?
- In '82, I think.
1101
01:15:46,263 --> 01:15:48,566
And who perpetrated the outrage, pray?
1102
01:15:48,800 --> 01:15:52,270
- Oh, merely the, er... English militia.
- Extraordinary.
1103
01:15:52,504 --> 01:15:56,008
Buon appetito.
1104
01:15:59,579 --> 01:16:01,581
Shall we indulge in another dozen?
1105
01:16:01,849 --> 01:16:04,953
- I rather think we ought, don't you?
- I think we might.
1106
01:16:05,187 --> 01:16:07,555
- Would you care for a second fish, Lely?
- No.
1107
01:16:07,789 --> 01:16:09,724
Or a veritable shoal, perhaps?
1108
01:16:09,958 --> 01:16:14,396
I've had an ample sufficiency,
thank you, my wee man.
1109
01:16:14,530 --> 01:16:16,999
I have an appointment
with Carte this afternoon.
1110
01:16:17,233 --> 01:16:19,903
- At what hour?
- Five o'clock.
1111
01:16:20,171 --> 01:16:22,839
Curious.
I shall be with him at half past four.
1112
01:16:23,073 --> 01:16:26,211
That's funny. I don't have
a meeting with him at four o'clock.
1113
01:16:26,445 --> 01:16:29,480
And it is my firm intention
to prise open his purse.
1114
01:16:29,713 --> 01:16:32,550
It will take a far stronger man
than you, Mr Barrington...
1115
01:16:32,785 --> 01:16:35,955
...to fulfil that Herculean labour.
1116
01:16:36,189 --> 01:16:38,391
What's "your" mission, Captain Grossmith?
1117
01:16:38,624 --> 01:16:42,429
Oh, there are certain little matters.
1118
01:16:42,563 --> 01:16:44,965
I should like to offer you
an increase in salary.
1119
01:16:45,199 --> 01:16:48,369
- Oh? Indeed?
- Indeed.
1120
01:16:48,603 --> 01:16:52,073
- That's most benevolent of you.
- It's no less than you deserve.
1121
01:16:52,307 --> 01:16:55,811
Thank you.
And by how much, might one enquire?
1122
01:16:56,045 --> 01:16:59,148
By 7 1/2 per cent.
1123
01:16:59,382 --> 01:17:01,284
Mm.
1124
01:17:01,518 --> 01:17:03,353
7 1/2.
1125
01:17:03,587 --> 01:17:06,390
Now, that would work out at, er...
1126
01:17:06,624 --> 01:17:08,993
- £30 per week.
- 30! Mm.
1127
01:17:09,227 --> 01:17:13,264
I see. Well, £30 per week
wasn't quite the sum I had in mind...
1128
01:17:13,532 --> 01:17:16,268
...as I wended my weary way here.
1129
01:17:16,502 --> 01:17:17,704
Indeed?
1130
01:17:17,971 --> 01:17:21,107
That would be three productions
with a negligible increase.
1131
01:17:21,375 --> 01:17:23,944
I don't consider an increase
of two pounds per week...
1132
01:17:24,211 --> 01:17:26,680
...over 12 months negligible, George.
1133
01:17:26,915 --> 01:17:29,952
One might have thought
the name of George Grossmith...
1134
01:17:30,185 --> 01:17:32,387
...my not inconsiderable contribution...
1135
01:17:32,655 --> 01:17:35,624
...would have been
more favourably recognised.
1136
01:17:35,892 --> 01:17:38,595
You do receive considerably more
than anyone else.
1137
01:17:38,829 --> 01:17:42,600
- Do I?
- Mm.
1138
01:17:44,135 --> 01:17:47,005
We should be terribly sorry to lose you.
1139
01:17:47,239 --> 01:17:50,475
Gilbert has written you
a particularly fine part in the new piece.
1140
01:17:50,709 --> 01:17:53,678
Precisely! As one would expect.
1141
01:17:53,913 --> 01:17:58,185
However, I should judge an increase
of a paltry two pound per week...
1142
01:17:58,451 --> 01:18:00,186
...to be wholly unacceptable.
1143
01:18:00,453 --> 01:18:03,957
Not to mention mildly insulting,
if one may say so.
1144
01:18:04,192 --> 01:18:10,233
And what figure had you in mind,
Mr Grossmith?
1145
01:18:11,768 --> 01:18:15,137
Er...
1146
01:18:15,238 --> 01:18:19,844
Forgive me, I seem to have
lost my train of thought.
1147
01:18:26,986 --> 01:18:31,090
Are you unwell, George?
1148
01:18:31,591 --> 01:18:34,894
I fear I may have come over a bit queer.
1149
01:18:35,128 --> 01:18:39,132
- Most embarrassing.
- You must take a little brandy.
1150
01:18:46,608 --> 01:18:49,278
A little water clears us of this deed.
1151
01:18:49,512 --> 01:18:51,346
I blame Grossmith for this.
1152
01:18:51,613 --> 01:18:53,515
- Only Grossmith?
- Thank you, Helen.
1153
01:18:53,749 --> 01:18:57,254
Confounded glutton.
1154
01:18:58,089 --> 01:19:00,323
- Are you feeling better?
- I do beg your pardon.
1155
01:19:00,557 --> 01:19:03,194
- This is awfully embarrassing.
- Not at all, Rutty.
1156
01:19:03,428 --> 01:19:06,397
Now why don't we return
to the subject of your salary?
1157
01:19:06,632 --> 01:19:09,034
Oh, yes.
1158
01:19:09,269 --> 01:19:14,707
Well, I must declare that I'm rather
at a loss for words, D'Oyly.
1159
01:19:14,841 --> 01:19:18,312
- Excuse me.
1160
01:19:18,513 --> 01:19:20,548
Oh, I do beg your pardon.
1161
01:19:20,815 --> 01:19:22,883
This is a bally nightmare, damn it!
1162
01:19:23,117 --> 01:19:26,521
I shall be in my dressing room!
1163
01:19:26,888 --> 01:19:31,593
The more I see of men,
the more I admire dogs.
1164
01:19:33,396 --> 01:19:35,231
I'm soon to have a meeting...
1165
01:19:35,499 --> 01:19:39,003
...concerning the cast for the next opera.
- Yes, indeed.
1166
01:19:39,237 --> 01:19:42,440
I've heard a little rumour
that I might be playing the part...
1167
01:19:42,674 --> 01:19:46,044
...of a 14-year-old schoolgirl.
- Somebody's been telling tales.
1168
01:19:46,278 --> 01:19:49,282
They have indeed, Mr Carte!
1169
01:19:49,516 --> 01:19:53,019
Mr Gilbert will be very angry.
1170
01:19:53,520 --> 01:19:56,957
With reference to your engagement
for the opera...
1171
01:19:57,191 --> 01:20:01,628
...I have a great concern
about your little weakness.
1172
01:20:06,934 --> 01:20:09,170
I'm a little shocked, Mr Carte.
1173
01:20:09,405 --> 01:20:13,676
I really do believe that my behaviour
this last year has been exemplary.
1174
01:20:13,909 --> 01:20:16,479
I'm pleased to say
your tendency has improved...
1175
01:20:16,713 --> 01:20:20,485
...but I am concerned about the future.
1176
01:20:22,120 --> 01:20:25,224
Yes.
You're perhaps suggesting, Mr Carte...
1177
01:20:25,458 --> 01:20:29,762
...that I shan't be performing
in the next production.
1178
01:20:29,996 --> 01:20:33,599
Yes, I'm afraid I am.
1179
01:20:33,734 --> 01:20:38,272
But the outcome of that, Leonora,
is in your own hands.
1180
01:20:43,111 --> 01:20:48,283
Sometimes, Mr Carte,
I can be a very silly young woman.
1181
01:20:48,518 --> 01:20:51,287
You have an extraordinary talent.
1182
01:20:51,521 --> 01:20:56,561
It saddens me beyond measure
to see someone throw it away.
1183
01:20:56,694 --> 01:21:00,931
I assure you, Mr Carte,
that I shall be in tiptop form.
1184
01:21:01,132 --> 01:21:03,034
I'm very pleased to hear that.
1185
01:21:03,302 --> 01:21:07,106
Much relieved.
1186
01:21:09,342 --> 01:21:11,744
Do we have an understanding?
1187
01:21:11,978 --> 01:21:16,116
Yes, we do, Mr Carte.
1188
01:21:17,918 --> 01:21:21,288
Good.
1189
01:21:22,457 --> 01:21:24,093
♪ Charlie, Charlie
1190
01:21:24,327 --> 01:21:26,896
♪ War would not follow thee
1191
01:21:27,129 --> 01:21:29,065
♪ King of the Highland hearts
1192
01:21:29,299 --> 01:21:32,902
♪ Bonnie Prince Charlie
1193
01:21:33,137 --> 01:21:36,206
- Chop chop, Butt! How long do we have?
1194
01:21:36,440 --> 01:21:38,743
- Eight minutes, Mr Temple.
- Oh, jolly good.
1195
01:21:38,977 --> 01:21:41,046
- Shocking news from Khartoum.
- Indeed.
1196
01:21:41,280 --> 01:21:43,582
Something will have to be done,
tout de suite.
1197
01:21:43,816 --> 01:21:45,050
Absolutely.
1198
01:21:45,284 --> 01:21:47,653
Mrs Temple hit the nail on the head,
as per usual.
1199
01:21:47,887 --> 01:21:48,921
Oh? What did she say?
1200
01:21:49,156 --> 01:21:52,058
"The nation loses a hero,
but the family loses a loved one."
1201
01:21:52,292 --> 01:21:55,128
- Ooh, how apt.
- Perspicacious woman is Mrs Temple.
1202
01:21:55,363 --> 01:21:57,198
Hat!
1203
01:21:57,465 --> 01:21:59,299
Consider this, my dear Butt.
1204
01:21:59,534 --> 01:22:02,503
Is it not the inevitable fate
of the professional soldier...
1205
01:22:02,737 --> 01:22:05,174
...that he may perish in battle?
- Indeed, sir.
1206
01:22:05,409 --> 01:22:08,011
But Dickie, have you heard
the "real" news of the day?
1207
01:22:08,244 --> 01:22:10,379
Yes, the Fenian bomb. Oh, dreadful.
1208
01:22:10,614 --> 01:22:12,449
No, Grossmith and Barrington.
1209
01:22:12,683 --> 01:22:14,517
- What?
- They're off tonight.
1210
01:22:14,785 --> 01:22:16,520
- Both of them?
- Yes.
1211
01:22:16,787 --> 01:22:18,490
- Why?
- Oysters.
1212
01:22:18,724 --> 01:22:20,891
- We shared luncheon.
- Did you swallow?
1213
01:22:21,126 --> 01:22:22,928
- No. I had sole.
- Off the bone?
1214
01:22:23,162 --> 01:22:26,131
- Yes. It was rather succulent.
- Wise man. Oysters can kill.
1215
01:22:26,366 --> 01:22:27,767
Unquestionably!
1216
01:22:28,001 --> 01:22:29,835
My aunt choked on a scallop
at Herne Bay.
1217
01:22:30,103 --> 01:22:32,206
- Really?
- Tragic.
1218
01:22:32,440 --> 01:22:34,207
Yes, they were away to see Carte.
1219
01:22:34,442 --> 01:22:36,142
- Oh, really?
- Mm.
1220
01:22:36,377 --> 01:22:38,880
- Will you be lobbying?
- No, I'll wait for my summons.
1221
01:22:39,147 --> 01:22:40,882
Quite right, dear boy.
1222
01:22:41,116 --> 01:22:43,318
One should not be rewarded
on one's ability...
1223
01:22:43,585 --> 01:22:45,787
...to ingratiate oneself
with the management.
1224
01:22:46,021 --> 01:22:48,724
Particularly when
the management have difficulty...
1225
01:22:48,958 --> 01:22:52,662
...locating the whereabouts
of the arse and the elbow!
1226
01:22:52,897 --> 01:22:56,367
Serves them both right.
1227
01:22:58,770 --> 01:23:01,140
Enter!
1228
01:23:01,373 --> 01:23:03,375
Five minutes, please, Mr Temple, Mr Lely.
1229
01:23:03,609 --> 01:23:06,978
- Thank you, Shrimp!
- Merci, Crevette!
1230
01:23:07,213 --> 01:23:08,782
One, two, three, four.
1231
01:23:09,016 --> 01:23:12,253
♪ And so, although I'm ready to go
1232
01:23:12,487 --> 01:23:14,488
- ♪ Yet recollect...
- Dolce!
1233
01:23:14,722 --> 01:23:17,492
- ♪ Did I neglect to thus effect...
- Expansive!
1234
01:23:17,726 --> 01:23:19,827
- ♪ So I object
- Good!
1235
01:23:20,062 --> 01:23:23,566
- ♪ And so, although
- Rutty, temper your volume, please.
1236
01:23:23,799 --> 01:23:27,103
- ♪ And greatly pine to brightly shine
- And now!
1237
01:23:27,338 --> 01:23:30,940
♪ With grief condign I must decline
1238
01:23:31,174 --> 01:23:33,143
♪ And go and show both friend and foe
1239
01:23:33,377 --> 01:23:35,146
♪ How much you dare, I'm quite aware
1240
01:23:35,380 --> 01:23:37,048
♪ It's your affair yet I declare
1241
01:23:37,282 --> 01:23:39,151
♪ I'd take your share but I don't
1242
01:23:39,384 --> 01:23:41,219
Bovill, that's very good, but...
1243
01:23:41,454 --> 01:23:44,256
...I've gone to great pain
to provide you with triplets.
1244
01:23:44,490 --> 01:23:46,726
- Triplets, Sir Arthur, yes.
- On his salary!
1245
01:23:46,960 --> 01:23:48,695
- Rutty, please.
- Apology.
1246
01:23:48,929 --> 01:23:52,066
Consequently,
if you would be so kind as to trip.
1247
01:23:52,300 --> 01:23:54,937
- Of course, Sir Arthur.
- One, two, three, four!
1248
01:23:55,170 --> 01:23:56,704
♪ And go and show both friend and foe
1249
01:23:56,938 --> 01:23:58,940
♪ How much you dare, I'm quite aware
1250
01:23:59,174 --> 01:24:00,908
♪ It's your affair yet I declare
1251
01:24:01,143 --> 01:24:03,379
♪ I'd take your share
but I don't much care
1252
01:24:03,613 --> 01:24:05,647
- Very much better.
- Thank you, Sir Arthur.
1253
01:24:05,882 --> 01:24:08,450
- The new man's doing awfully well.
- Quite splendid.
1254
01:24:08,685 --> 01:24:10,254
Breathe, Bovill, breathe!
1255
01:24:10,488 --> 01:24:13,124
- It's "piano", Barrington, "piano".
- I'll do my best.
1256
01:24:13,390 --> 01:24:16,927
- As many P's as you can muster, Rutland.
- Without landing us in the soup!
1257
01:24:17,162 --> 01:24:18,764
One, two, three, four!
1258
01:24:19,031 --> 01:24:20,498
♪ And go and show both friend and foe
1259
01:24:20,732 --> 01:24:22,534
♪ How much you dare, I'm quite aware
1260
01:24:22,769 --> 01:24:24,404
♪ It's your affair yet I declare
1261
01:24:24,672 --> 01:24:26,106
♪ I'd take your share but I don't
1262
01:24:26,340 --> 01:24:27,274
And going on!
1263
01:24:27,508 --> 01:24:29,308
- ♪ I must decline
- ♪ So I object
1264
01:24:29,543 --> 01:24:31,211
- ♪ I must decline
- ♪ So I object
1265
01:24:31,445 --> 01:24:32,947
- ♪ I'd take your share
- ♪ So I object
1266
01:24:33,180 --> 01:24:35,249
- ♪ I'd take your share
- ♪ So I object
1267
01:24:38,353 --> 01:24:40,822
♪ To sit in solemn silence in a...
1268
01:24:41,057 --> 01:24:44,293
Gentlemen. "Un poco piú viva", hm?
1269
01:24:44,527 --> 01:24:47,931
Now, before the double-bar line,
it's one, two, three, four.
1270
01:24:48,165 --> 01:24:50,700
And afterwards, one, two, three, four.
1271
01:24:50,934 --> 01:24:52,470
- Clear?
- Very quiet.
1272
01:24:52,704 --> 01:24:55,507
From here, please. One, two, three, four.
1273
01:24:55,741 --> 01:24:58,610
♪ Care, I don't much care,
I don't much care
1274
01:24:58,844 --> 01:25:01,714
♪ To sit in solemn silence
in a dull, dark dock
1275
01:25:01,948 --> 01:25:04,584
♪ In a pestilential prison
with a lifelong lock
1276
01:25:04,818 --> 01:25:07,353
♪ Awaiting the sensation
of a short, sharp shock
1277
01:25:07,587 --> 01:25:10,324
♪ From a cheap and chippy chopper
on a big, black block
1278
01:25:10,592 --> 01:25:13,061
♪ To sit in solemn silence
in a dull, dark dock
1279
01:25:13,294 --> 01:25:16,298
♪ In a pestilential prison
with a lifelong lock
1280
01:25:16,532 --> 01:25:18,968
♪ Awaiting the sensation
of a short, sharp shock
1281
01:25:19,236 --> 01:25:21,938
♪ From a cheap and chippy chopper
on a big, black block
1282
01:25:22,172 --> 01:25:23,406
♪ A dull, dark dock
1283
01:25:23,674 --> 01:25:24,808
♪ A lifelong lock
1284
01:25:25,075 --> 01:25:26,176
♪ A short, sharp shock
1285
01:25:26,410 --> 01:25:27,712
♪ A big, black block
1286
01:25:27,946 --> 01:25:30,414
♪ To sit in solemn silence
in a pestilential prison
1287
01:25:30,648 --> 01:25:33,351
♪ And awaiting the sensation
from a cheap and chippy chopper
1288
01:25:33,585 --> 01:25:34,819
♪ On a big
1289
01:25:35,053 --> 01:25:36,887
♪ Black
1290
01:25:37,156 --> 01:25:39,826
♪ Block
1291
01:25:40,059 --> 01:25:42,528
- Bravo!
- Splendid!
1292
01:25:42,797 --> 01:25:45,065
Louis! Wir brauchen etwas Kaffee!
1293
01:25:45,299 --> 01:25:47,134
Your coffee is ready, Sir Arthur.
1294
01:25:47,368 --> 01:25:50,670
- My word!
- First rate.
1295
01:25:50,905 --> 01:25:54,976
- Rutty, do go through.
- Thanks, old chap.
1296
01:26:01,617 --> 01:26:03,853
Do one's hands remain within,
Madame Leon?
1297
01:26:04,088 --> 01:26:06,656
Oh, no, my dear. No, no, no. Look! Here!
1298
01:26:06,890 --> 01:26:08,792
- Comme ça.
- Oh, I see!
1299
01:26:09,027 --> 01:26:10,995
Voilá!
1300
01:26:11,229 --> 01:26:14,365
Are you still troubled by
your understandings, Miss Bond?
1301
01:26:14,632 --> 01:26:17,836
- I'm in much pain this afternoon.
- I'm so sorry to hear it.
1302
01:26:18,070 --> 01:26:21,373
Ah, trés jolie, trés jolie. Superbe!
1303
01:26:21,608 --> 01:26:23,477
Such exquisite embroidery.
1304
01:26:23,710 --> 01:26:25,845
What are you wearing
underneath your gown?
1305
01:26:26,113 --> 01:26:27,515
Only my frillies.
1306
01:26:27,749 --> 01:26:30,217
Alas, no corsets, I'm afraid to say.
1307
01:26:30,452 --> 01:26:33,956
Shall we be revealing a little,
Madame Leon?
1308
01:26:34,189 --> 01:26:37,325
- I certainly hope not, Miss Braham.
- Oh, what a pity.
1309
01:26:37,594 --> 01:26:39,662
Do take care, Miss Morton!
1310
01:26:39,897 --> 01:26:42,099
Makes one rather drowsy.
1311
01:26:42,332 --> 01:26:45,568
- It does look comfortable, Sibyl.
- Indeed it is.
1312
01:26:45,837 --> 01:26:49,574
La kimono! Doucement, doucement!
Gently, gently.
1313
01:26:49,808 --> 01:26:52,309
Ooh, the silk is sublime, Madame Leon.
1314
01:26:52,544 --> 01:26:55,014
Indeed.
From Mr Liberty's store, don't you know?
1315
01:26:55,247 --> 01:26:59,318
Bona fide Japanese,
and just a soupçon from gai Paris.
1316
01:26:59,552 --> 01:27:02,422
- C'est magnifique!- Oui.
1317
01:27:02,657 --> 01:27:05,260
Is one to be prevented
from wearing one's corset?
1318
01:27:05,493 --> 01:27:09,095
None of the ladies shall be
wearing corsets during the performance.
1319
01:27:09,330 --> 01:27:13,035
- That's simply preposterous.
- Our aim is to emulate Japanese ladies.
1320
01:27:13,268 --> 01:27:15,069
And they are as thin as threadpaper!
1321
01:27:15,304 --> 01:27:17,540
As a Roman column
is opposed to a Grecian urn.
1322
01:27:17,774 --> 01:27:18,575
Quite so.
1323
01:27:18,809 --> 01:27:22,312
I fear for my reputation, don't you know?
1324
01:27:22,546 --> 01:27:24,548
I am following Mr Gilbert's instructions.
1325
01:27:24,782 --> 01:27:26,950
Mr Gilbert desires
the Japanese appearance.
1326
01:27:27,184 --> 01:27:30,554
That which Mr Gilbert desires,
Mr Gilbert must have. Fait accompli!
1327
01:27:30,789 --> 01:27:33,758
One can hardly cut a dash
in this... dressing gown!
1328
01:27:33,993 --> 01:27:35,861
Do stop fussing, Jessie, please!
1329
01:27:36,094 --> 01:27:38,630
- It's delightful, Madame Leon!
- Thank you.
1330
01:27:38,865 --> 01:27:41,468
- It's shapeless.
- Yes, Miss Bond, it is shapeless.
1331
01:27:41,701 --> 01:27:44,270
Japanese ladies are most shapeless...
1332
01:27:44,505 --> 01:27:46,741
...but there is no need
for "you" to be shapeless.
1333
01:27:46,974 --> 01:27:49,877
I have devised a solution -
if I may crave your indulgence.
1334
01:27:50,112 --> 01:27:53,615
Miss Morton... Miss Grey,
would you kindly raise your arms?
1335
01:27:53,883 --> 01:27:56,986
Merci, merci!
Now, the bow goes at the back.
1336
01:27:57,221 --> 01:27:59,555
The sash at the front, lined with calico.
1337
01:27:59,789 --> 01:28:02,793
Now... tournez. Tournez, s'il vous plaît.
1338
01:28:03,026 --> 01:28:05,929
Now, this may be laced
as tightly as you require.
1339
01:28:06,196 --> 01:28:07,832
Tournez... á gauche, á gauche.
1340
01:28:08,066 --> 01:28:09,400
Oui.
1341
01:28:09,634 --> 01:28:13,271
So you see, in effect, it is a corset!
1342
01:28:13,505 --> 01:28:16,342
- Where's the whalebone?
- There are no bones, Miss Bond.
1343
01:28:16,576 --> 01:28:19,981
Well, Madame Leon, I do fear
that if there are no bones...
1344
01:28:20,214 --> 01:28:22,081
...then it is plainly not a corset.
1345
01:28:22,315 --> 01:28:25,753
No, Miss Bond, it is not a corset,
but it may serve for a corset.
1346
01:28:25,987 --> 01:28:27,789
It may give you the shape you desire.
1347
01:28:28,022 --> 01:28:29,958
Tighter, please, Miss Morton, tighter!
1348
01:28:30,192 --> 01:28:32,494
I cannot appear on stage without a corset.
1349
01:28:32,761 --> 01:28:35,098
It certainly feels like a corset, Jessie.
1350
01:28:35,332 --> 01:28:37,934
You do resemble a birthday gift.
I could eat you.
1351
01:28:40,537 --> 01:28:44,675
Do forgive me, Miss Bond. One is
working to the best of one's abilities.
1352
01:28:44,909 --> 01:28:48,313
I fear sometimes it is not appreciated.
1353
01:28:50,416 --> 01:28:53,952
- That is the "hori". Am I correct, Wilhelm?
- Quite so, Mr Gilbert.
1354
01:28:54,186 --> 01:28:57,456
As opposed to the "zori",
which is the stocking, is it not?
1355
01:28:57,725 --> 01:29:00,427
- The stockings are the "tarbi", sir.
- Ah! "Tarbi".
1356
01:29:00,661 --> 01:29:03,630
- The sandals are the "zori".
- Exactly, sir.
1357
01:29:03,864 --> 01:29:05,899
I'm beginning to get it, Grossmith.
1358
01:29:06,134 --> 01:29:08,070
- Mr Gilbert.
- Lely?
1359
01:29:08,302 --> 01:29:11,374
Is this to be the length of my gown
for Nanki-Poo?
1360
01:29:11,640 --> 01:29:14,109
- I believe so. Wilhelm?
- Indeed it is.
1361
01:29:14,343 --> 01:29:15,144
Yes.
1362
01:29:15,378 --> 01:29:17,913
Do you not consider it to be perhaps...
too short?
1363
01:29:18,148 --> 01:29:19,817
Too short for what?
1364
01:29:20,085 --> 01:29:24,355
For propriety.
Might it not be rather unseemly?
1365
01:29:24,589 --> 01:29:28,493
- I'm sorry, unseemly to whom?
- To the audience of the Savoy Theatre.
1366
01:29:28,760 --> 01:29:31,997
Hmm. I shouldn't have thought so.
1367
01:29:32,231 --> 01:29:33,832
In any case, I shall be the judge.
1368
01:29:34,066 --> 01:29:37,904
Rest assured, Mr Lely, my designs
are properly researched and authentic.
1369
01:29:38,138 --> 01:29:41,675
No offence to you, Mr Wilhelm,
but your properly authentic costume...
1370
01:29:41,910 --> 01:29:44,311
...seems to have left me
in the buff somewhat!
1371
01:29:44,545 --> 01:29:46,380
- Quite.
- No more in the buff...
1372
01:29:46,615 --> 01:29:49,718
...than Japanese peasants
have been for the last 800 years.
1373
01:29:49,952 --> 01:29:54,323
May I draw your attention to the fact that
I am not, actually, a Japanese peasant.
1374
01:29:54,557 --> 01:29:58,193
No. You're a Scotch actor, who is
taking the part of a Japanese prince...
1375
01:29:58,428 --> 01:30:00,465
...who is posing as an itinerant minstrel.
1376
01:30:00,699 --> 01:30:03,869
Lely, I would be only too happy
for the tailor here...
1377
01:30:04,103 --> 01:30:08,073
...to chop off some of my surplus
and stitch it to your kilt.
1378
01:30:08,307 --> 01:30:11,311
Thank you, Grossmith.
I'm sure we shall reap the benefits...
1379
01:30:11,545 --> 01:30:13,245
...of your remonstrations in time.
1380
01:30:13,479 --> 01:30:17,384
Yes, GG. Do you not agree with me
that this garment is rather vulgar?
1381
01:30:17,618 --> 01:30:19,420
I do, as it happens.
1382
01:30:19,687 --> 01:30:21,254
Mr Grossmith...
1383
01:30:21,522 --> 01:30:23,524
...kindly oblige me by removing your hat.
1384
01:30:23,758 --> 01:30:25,593
Why, sir? Are you ready for me?
1385
01:30:25,828 --> 01:30:27,629
Would that I were, sir!
1386
01:30:27,863 --> 01:30:31,566
I'll thank you not to refer
to my designs as vulgar, Mr Lely.
1387
01:30:31,801 --> 01:30:36,473
Mr Wilhelm, to my eyes, your designs
are not only vulgar but obscene!
1388
01:30:36,707 --> 01:30:40,377
- How dare you, sir?
- Strong words, Lely. What do you mean?
1389
01:30:40,645 --> 01:30:45,317
Mr Gilbert, I'm a respectably married man
and I love my wife dearly.
1390
01:30:45,550 --> 01:30:47,752
One of the few pleasures
she has enjoyed...
1391
01:30:47,986 --> 01:30:50,989
...since the untimely demise
of my beloved mother-in-law...
1392
01:30:51,224 --> 01:30:53,559
...has been to watch me
perform upon the stage.
1393
01:30:53,793 --> 01:30:58,264
But I am not prepared to allow her to
suffer the embarrassment of seeing me...
1394
01:30:58,498 --> 01:31:04,672
...flaunted before the public like a...
half-dressed performing dog!
1395
01:31:04,806 --> 01:31:06,640
You have my sympathies, Lely.
1396
01:31:06,875 --> 01:31:09,311
But, unfortunately,
your avocation as an actor...
1397
01:31:09,545 --> 01:31:14,050
...compels you on occasion to endure
the most ignominious indignities...
1398
01:31:14,284 --> 01:31:16,386
...as Grossmith will doubtless testify.
1399
01:31:16,620 --> 01:31:19,556
- Without question, sir.
- Mr Lely, let me be clear.
1400
01:31:19,790 --> 01:31:22,059
I will not alter
one stitch of your costume...
1401
01:31:22,326 --> 01:31:24,763
...to protect the sensibilities of your wife...
1402
01:31:24,997 --> 01:31:28,199
...your children or any other member
of your unfortunate family.
1403
01:31:28,434 --> 01:31:32,004
Mr Wilhelm, I would strongly advise
you not to speak of my family...
1404
01:31:32,238 --> 01:31:34,073
...in such a despicable manner!
1405
01:31:34,307 --> 01:31:36,041
Sir.
1406
01:31:36,276 --> 01:31:38,078
Will you remove your corset?
1407
01:31:38,312 --> 01:31:41,115
I beg your pardon?!
1408
01:31:41,349 --> 01:31:43,183
Kindly remove your corset, Mr Lely.
1409
01:31:43,418 --> 01:31:47,190
It'll spoil the hang of the cloth.
1410
01:31:49,026 --> 01:31:50,960
Mr Gilbert.
1411
01:31:51,193 --> 01:31:53,062
I never perform without my corset.
1412
01:31:53,329 --> 01:31:56,666
- What, never?
- I'm afraid not, sir.
1413
01:31:56,901 --> 01:31:58,769
Why not?
1414
01:31:59,003 --> 01:32:01,640
One cannot produce
the required vocal vigour...
1415
01:32:01,873 --> 01:32:04,543
...without the necessary
diaphragmatical support...
1416
01:32:04,811 --> 01:32:06,545
...that the corset affords.
1417
01:32:06,811 --> 01:32:09,381
Come, come, Lely.
This is not grand opera in Milan.
1418
01:32:09,649 --> 01:32:13,085
It is merely low burlesque in a small
theatre on the banks of the Thames.
1419
01:32:13,319 --> 01:32:14,988
You have a fine, strong voice...
1420
01:32:15,222 --> 01:32:18,726
...which is more than adequate
for our purposes, corset or no corset.
1421
01:32:18,960 --> 01:32:20,962
Kindly remove it this instant.
1422
01:32:21,195 --> 01:32:23,397
You may retire behind the screen,
if you wish.
1423
01:32:23,631 --> 01:32:25,267
Very well, sir.
1424
01:32:25,501 --> 01:32:27,369
But, may I just say...
1425
01:32:27,603 --> 01:32:30,406
...that in five years
of loyal service to this company...
1426
01:32:30,640 --> 01:32:32,943
...I have never, until now,
lodged a complaint.
1427
01:32:33,210 --> 01:32:37,213
Your noble restraint
has been much appreciated.
1428
01:32:37,448 --> 01:32:39,952
Thank you, sir.
1429
01:32:43,621 --> 01:32:45,991
♪ A wandering minstrel I
1430
01:32:46,225 --> 01:32:50,331
♪ A thing of shreds and patches
1431
01:32:50,564 --> 01:32:53,466
♪ Of ballads, songs and snatches
1432
01:32:53,734 --> 01:32:57,271
♪ And dreamy lullaby
1433
01:32:57,505 --> 01:32:59,841
♪ My catalogue is long
1434
01:33:00,075 --> 01:33:03,912
♪ Though every passion ranging
1435
01:33:04,146 --> 01:33:07,482
♪ And to your humours changing
1436
01:33:07,716 --> 01:33:12,121
♪ I tune my supple song
1437
01:33:12,356 --> 01:33:21,532
♪ I tune my supple song
1438
01:33:22,034 --> 01:33:26,405
♪ Are you in sentimental mood?
1439
01:33:26,639 --> 01:33:28,874
♪ I'll sigh with you
1440
01:33:30,711 --> 01:33:33,814
♪ Oh
1441
01:33:34,048 --> 01:33:37,518
♪ Sorrow
1442
01:33:37,752 --> 01:33:42,090
♪ On maiden's coldness do you brood?
1443
01:33:42,324 --> 01:33:46,095
♪ I'll do so, too
1444
01:33:46,329 --> 01:33:51,167
♪ Oh, sorrow
1445
01:33:51,402 --> 01:33:55,072
♪ Sorrow
1446
01:33:55,306 --> 01:33:57,709
♪ I'll charm your willing ears
1447
01:33:57,976 --> 01:34:03,081
♪ With songs of lovers' fears
1448
01:34:03,315 --> 01:34:07,052
♪ While sympathetic tears
1449
01:34:07,286 --> 01:34:11,358
♪ My cheeks bedew
1450
01:34:11,593 --> 01:34:16,798
♪ Oh, sorrow
1451
01:34:17,031 --> 01:34:22,237
♪ Sorrow
1452
01:34:22,471 --> 01:34:23,706
Thank you, Seymour!
1453
01:34:23,973 --> 01:34:27,644
Miss Sixpence Please,
would you kindly come along with me?
1454
01:34:27,877 --> 01:34:29,278
Make haste, make haste!
1455
01:34:29,513 --> 01:34:31,348
- Johnny.
- Thank you very much.
1456
01:34:31,616 --> 01:34:35,552
Ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce
you all to Miss Sixpence Please?
1457
01:34:35,786 --> 01:34:39,557
You may have heard me speak of her
with reverence and respect. Thank you.
1458
01:34:39,791 --> 01:34:41,794
Very good.
Make yourselves comfortable.
1459
01:34:42,027 --> 01:34:43,895
Please be seated. Thank you.
1460
01:34:44,130 --> 01:34:46,833
Ah! Sir! My apologies.
I've been neglecting you.
1461
01:34:47,100 --> 01:34:48,935
Would you like to come this way?
1462
01:34:49,169 --> 01:34:51,871
No, it's all right, Seymour.
He can use your chair.
1463
01:34:52,139 --> 01:34:53,974
Here you are, sir. Be seated here.
1464
01:34:54,209 --> 01:34:57,512
Very good indeed. Pride of place, sir!
Make yourself comfortable.
1465
01:34:57,780 --> 01:34:59,414
Cellier!
1466
01:34:59,647 --> 01:35:01,283
Yes. Now.
1467
01:35:01,517 --> 01:35:05,721
D'Auban! Will you kindly withdraw
to the side of the stage immediately?
1468
01:35:05,955 --> 01:35:07,957
- Johnny!
- Thank you, "Monsieur" D'Auban!
1469
01:35:08,191 --> 01:35:10,293
Ladies, will you take up
your fans, please?
1470
01:35:10,528 --> 01:35:13,565
What I'd like you to do, sir,
is to observe the proceedings.
1471
01:35:13,798 --> 01:35:17,034
Would you give all your attention
to the performance? Thank you.
1472
01:35:17,269 --> 01:35:19,238
Barker, what are you doing? Joining in?
1473
01:35:19,471 --> 01:35:23,309
My dancing days are long over,
Mr Gilbert.
1474
01:35:23,575 --> 01:35:25,410
Over, Barker, but not forgotten.
1475
01:35:25,645 --> 01:35:27,781
Ladies, opening attitudes, s'il vous plaît.
1476
01:35:28,014 --> 01:35:30,618
From the beginning,
counting two bars, Mrs Russell.
1477
01:35:30,852 --> 01:35:35,656
- Thank you.
- One, two. Two, two.
1478
01:35:43,966 --> 01:35:45,635
♪ Three little maids from school are we
1479
01:35:45,868 --> 01:35:47,871
♪ Pert as a schoolgirl well can be
1480
01:35:48,139 --> 01:35:50,940
♪ Filled to the brim with girlish glee
1481
01:35:51,174 --> 01:35:52,810
- ♪ Three little maids from school
- Fans!
1482
01:35:53,044 --> 01:35:55,847
♪ Everything is a source of fun
1483
01:35:56,081 --> 01:36:00,252
♪ Nobody's safe, for we care for none
1484
01:36:00,486 --> 01:36:04,725
♪ Life is a joke that's just begun
1485
01:36:05,492 --> 01:36:07,394
♪ Three little maids from school
1486
01:36:07,661 --> 01:36:09,863
All fans rising slowly...
1487
01:36:10,098 --> 01:36:12,801
- And!
- ♪ Three little maids who all unwary
1488
01:36:13,034 --> 01:36:15,403
Stop! Thank you very much!
Now, Miss Sixpence...
1489
01:36:15,637 --> 01:36:17,973
Carte! I beg your pardon.
1490
01:36:18,208 --> 01:36:20,276
Let me introduce our Japanese guests.
1491
01:36:20,542 --> 01:36:23,512
Ladies. Mr D'Oyly Carte. Our proprietor.
1492
01:36:23,780 --> 01:36:25,816
- Please continue.
- Thank you very much.
1493
01:36:26,050 --> 01:36:28,084
Now. Miss Sixpence Please.
1494
01:36:28,318 --> 01:36:30,487
That performance
that you have witnessed...
1495
01:36:30,721 --> 01:36:34,559
...was not even remotely Japanese.
Am I right?
1496
01:36:35,161 --> 01:36:37,128
Japanese.
1497
01:36:39,432 --> 01:36:42,302
- Sir. Japanese?
- Japanese.
1498
01:36:42,536 --> 01:36:44,570
- No.
- No.
1499
01:36:44,804 --> 01:36:47,174
- Thank you very much.
- Excuse me, Mr Gilbert, sir.
1500
01:36:47,408 --> 01:36:50,177
- Japanese.
- Japanese.
1501
01:36:50,410 --> 01:36:52,479
- Yes.
- Yes.
1502
01:36:52,713 --> 01:36:56,518
- He hasn't got any idea what you mean.
- That's blatantly obvious, D'Auban!
1503
01:36:56,753 --> 01:36:59,488
- Parlate italiano?
- If he doesn't speak English...
1504
01:36:59,722 --> 01:37:01,724
...he's hardly likely to speak Italian!
1505
01:37:01,958 --> 01:37:03,393
I beg your pardon, Mr Gilbert.
1506
01:37:03,660 --> 01:37:05,561
Porca miseria!Non posso lavorare cosí!
1507
01:37:05,795 --> 01:37:07,298
It's a waste of time!
1508
01:37:07,532 --> 01:37:10,801
If you three ladies come with me,
please.
1509
01:37:11,035 --> 01:37:14,172
Please go to the back of the stage.
Thank you.
1510
01:37:14,406 --> 01:37:17,443
Yes, yes. Come upstage.
As quickly as you can. Come along.
1511
01:37:17,677 --> 01:37:20,412
Thank you.
1512
01:37:20,646 --> 01:37:23,049
- Thank you.
- Thank you very much indeed.
1513
01:37:23,283 --> 01:37:25,652
One, two, three.
1514
01:37:25,886 --> 01:37:27,655
Very good. Thank you.
1515
01:37:27,888 --> 01:37:30,824
Now, what I would like you to do
when the music commences...
1516
01:37:31,059 --> 01:37:33,062
...I would like you to advance downstage.
1517
01:37:33,295 --> 01:37:34,897
Thank you very much.
1518
01:37:35,131 --> 01:37:37,999
- Cellier.
- One, two. Two, two.
1519
01:37:38,267 --> 01:37:42,305
- Off you go. Come along.
1520
01:37:42,540 --> 01:37:43,640
Stop, stop!
1521
01:37:43,907 --> 01:37:46,777
Will this take long?
I'm to arrange a mazurka at four o'clock.
1522
01:37:47,012 --> 01:37:48,847
I have not made myself clear.
1523
01:37:49,081 --> 01:37:53,017
When Mrs Russell commences playing
the pianoforte, diddle-dum, diddle-dee...
1524
01:37:53,251 --> 01:37:56,888
...what I would like you to do
is to advance downstage.
1525
01:37:57,123 --> 01:37:59,826
Comme ça, diddle-dum, diddle-dee.
1526
01:38:00,059 --> 01:38:03,463
Do you understand?
I think you do. Let's try once more.
1527
01:38:03,697 --> 01:38:04,965
Cellier!
1528
01:38:05,199 --> 01:38:07,935
- One, two. Two, two.
1529
01:38:08,169 --> 01:38:11,506
Come along. That's it. Very good!
1530
01:38:11,740 --> 01:38:14,976
Excellent! That is exactly it!
Thank you very much indeed!
1531
01:38:15,210 --> 01:38:16,645
Excellent! First rate.
1532
01:38:16,879 --> 01:38:18,947
Thank you very much indeed.
1533
01:38:19,182 --> 01:38:20,884
D'Auban, that is exactly what I want.
1534
01:38:21,117 --> 01:38:23,920
I do beg your pardon,
but I appear to have missed the point.
1535
01:38:24,188 --> 01:38:27,358
- That is the very effect I need.
- And what effect exactly is that?
1536
01:38:27,626 --> 01:38:29,726
- What did they do?
- They walked downstage.
1537
01:38:29,961 --> 01:38:32,497
They appeared to me to be
ambling along the Strand.
1538
01:38:32,731 --> 01:38:35,734
They walked downstage
in the Japanese manner!
1539
01:38:35,968 --> 01:38:39,039
They walked in the Japanese manner
because they are Japanese.
1540
01:38:39,306 --> 01:38:42,743
Exactly! And that is precisely
why they are here.
1541
01:38:42,976 --> 01:38:45,946
Our maids are not Japanese.
However, they are very funny.
1542
01:38:46,180 --> 01:38:50,250
No funnier, however, than they would be
if they all sat down on pork pies.
1543
01:38:50,485 --> 01:38:53,188
- Young fella-me-lad, Mr Gilbert, sir.
1544
01:38:53,421 --> 01:38:55,891
I've arranged
Terpsichore, Chinese, Japanese...
1545
01:38:56,125 --> 01:38:58,427
...for pantomime, burlesque
and the ballet...
1546
01:38:58,661 --> 01:39:00,830
...for many a season,
always to great acclaim.
1547
01:39:01,064 --> 01:39:03,500
D'Auban... this is not low burlesque.
1548
01:39:03,734 --> 01:39:07,404
This is an entirely original
Japanese opera.
1549
01:39:07,638 --> 01:39:11,576
Miss Bond, Miss Braham and Miss Grey,
kindly resume your opening positions!
1550
01:39:11,811 --> 01:39:14,881
Please be seated once more.
Please be seated. Thank you.
1551
01:39:15,147 --> 01:39:17,851
Thank you!
1552
01:39:18,084 --> 01:39:21,420
Come along!
Come along, tortoise! Quickly, quickly!
1553
01:39:21,654 --> 01:39:24,825
What I would like you to do now
is to perform it...
1554
01:39:25,059 --> 01:39:28,328
...just as you have seen our guests
perform it. Thank you very much.
1555
01:39:28,563 --> 01:39:30,398
- Mr Gilbert!
- Yes, Jessie.
1556
01:39:30,666 --> 01:39:34,203
- Is that "exactly" as we have just seen?
- Exactly!
1557
01:39:34,470 --> 01:39:37,205
Without using "Monsieur" D'Auban's steps,
Mr Gilbert?
1558
01:39:37,439 --> 01:39:40,009
I want you to perform it
precisely as you have seen...
1559
01:39:40,244 --> 01:39:43,046
...our Japanese friends perform it.
Thank you very much!
1560
01:39:43,280 --> 01:39:46,650
- Exactement. C'est pas difficile.
- Very slowly and very boringly.
1561
01:39:46,885 --> 01:39:48,387
One, two. Two, two.
1562
01:39:52,658 --> 01:39:54,426
Very good!
1563
01:39:54,660 --> 01:39:56,529
First rate.
1564
01:39:56,763 --> 01:39:59,331
That is exactly right.
Thank you very much indeed!
1565
01:39:59,566 --> 01:40:03,739
That's as funny as when me tights caught
fire in Harlequin Meets ltchity-Switch.
1566
01:40:03,971 --> 01:40:05,705
Decorum in rehearsal, D'Auban.
1567
01:40:05,940 --> 01:40:07,775
That's the way, yes!
1568
01:40:08,009 --> 01:40:11,013
Very good indeed.
1569
01:40:11,247 --> 01:40:13,248
Try them together, try them together.
1570
01:40:13,482 --> 01:40:15,984
Three of them, do it all together.
The same noise.
1571
01:40:16,218 --> 01:40:17,754
One, two, three!
1572
01:40:17,988 --> 01:40:19,823
Ah! Excellent!
1573
01:40:29,167 --> 01:40:30,803
♪ Three little maids from school are we
1574
01:40:31,070 --> 01:40:32,905
♪ Pert as a schoolgirl well can be
1575
01:40:33,139 --> 01:40:35,741
♪ Filled to the brim with girlish glee
1576
01:40:35,975 --> 01:40:36,809
♪ Three little maids from school
1577
01:40:37,043 --> 01:40:40,548
♪ Everything is a source of fun
1578
01:40:41,382 --> 01:40:44,552
♪ Nobody's safe for we care for none
1579
01:40:44,786 --> 01:40:48,324
♪ Life is a joke that's just begun
1580
01:40:49,391 --> 01:40:53,229
♪ Three little maids from school
1581
01:40:54,030 --> 01:40:55,865
♪ Three little maids who all unwary
1582
01:40:56,100 --> 01:40:58,068
♪ Come from a ladies' seminary
1583
01:40:58,302 --> 01:41:00,737
♪ Freed from its genius tutelary
1584
01:41:00,971 --> 01:41:02,806
♪ Three little maids from school
1585
01:41:03,075 --> 01:41:07,245
♪ Three little maids from school
1586
01:41:11,050 --> 01:41:12,850
♪ One little maid is a bride, Yum-Yum
1587
01:41:13,085 --> 01:41:14,888
♪ Two little maids in attendance come
1588
01:41:15,154 --> 01:41:16,923
♪ Three little maids is the total sum
1589
01:41:16,291 --> 01:41:20,661
♪ Three little maids from school
1590
01:41:20,860 --> 01:41:22,996
♪ From three little maids take one away
1591
01:41:23,231 --> 01:41:24,899
♪ Two little maids remain and they
1592
01:41:25,133 --> 01:41:26,968
♪ Won't have to wait very long, they say
1593
01:41:27,236 --> 01:41:29,070
♪ Three little maids from school
1594
01:41:29,305 --> 01:41:31,207
♪ Three little maids from school
1595
01:41:31,474 --> 01:41:33,109
♪ Three little maids who all unwary
1596
01:41:33,343 --> 01:41:35,112
♪ Come from a ladies' seminary
1597
01:41:35,345 --> 01:41:37,581
♪ Freed from its genius tutelary
1598
01:41:37,815 --> 01:41:39,784
♪ Three little maids from school
1599
01:41:40,018 --> 01:41:45,223
♪ Three little maids from school
1600
01:41:49,095 --> 01:41:51,263
Laughing, ha ha, chaffing, ha ha
1601
01:41:51,497 --> 01:41:53,131
Nectar quaffing, ha ha ha haa,
1602
01:41:53,366 --> 01:41:55,868
But condemned to die is he,
1603
01:41:56,103 --> 01:41:59,106
Wretched meritorious B.
1604
01:41:59,339 --> 01:42:01,808
Mikado leads Katisha off.
1605
01:42:02,077 --> 01:42:06,214
Off, up the stairs...
1606
01:42:08,150 --> 01:42:10,553
Thus... the traditional Japanese posture...
1607
01:42:10,787 --> 01:42:14,389
...as adopted by well-meaning
but misguided underlings...
1608
01:42:14,623 --> 01:42:17,193
...upon the departure
of their august superiors.
1609
01:42:17,428 --> 01:42:21,131
- Thank you.
- Is that a recognised Japanese attitude?
1610
01:42:21,399 --> 01:42:25,238
Not as yet, Grossmith. But I have every
confidence that it will become one.
1611
01:42:25,471 --> 01:42:27,039
Much obliged.
1612
01:42:27,273 --> 01:42:31,209
I'm sure I've seen this
on a vase somewhere.
1613
01:42:32,613 --> 01:42:34,715
Jessie.
1614
01:42:34,949 --> 01:42:38,218
Thank you, Mr Gilbert.
1615
01:42:38,753 --> 01:42:41,423
Ha! A pretty picture! Eh, Seymour?
1616
01:42:41,657 --> 01:42:44,392
Charming, sir.
1617
01:42:44,626 --> 01:42:48,932
The Mikado has left. Grossmith.
1618
01:42:49,500 --> 01:42:53,237
Well...
another fine mess you've got us into.
1619
01:42:53,470 --> 01:42:56,574
No! My line is,
'A nice mess you've got us into.'
1620
01:42:56,840 --> 01:43:00,010
And I should be much obliged
if you would play it comme ça.
1621
01:43:00,278 --> 01:43:03,815
Well... a nice mess you've got us into.
1622
01:43:04,049 --> 01:43:07,553
Righto, sir.
1623
01:43:09,256 --> 01:43:12,393
- Well...
- No! Well...
1624
01:43:12,626 --> 01:43:13,960
Well...
1625
01:43:14,194 --> 01:43:17,097
...a nice mess you've got us into...
1626
01:43:17,331 --> 01:43:21,502
...with your nodding head and
the deference due to a man of pedigree.
1627
01:43:21,736 --> 01:43:25,340
Mr Grossmith,
you are under sentence of death...
1628
01:43:25,574 --> 01:43:27,675
...by something lingering.
1629
01:43:27,910 --> 01:43:30,347
Either boiling oil or melted lead.
1630
01:43:30,581 --> 01:43:34,818
Kindly bear that in mind. Thank you.
1631
01:43:35,052 --> 01:43:37,521
Well, a nice mess you've got us into...
1632
01:43:37,755 --> 01:43:42,361
...with your nodding head and
the deference due to a man of pedigree.
1633
01:43:42,595 --> 01:43:44,596
Merely corroborative detail...
1634
01:43:44,830 --> 01:43:48,268
...intended to give artistic verisimilitude...
1635
01:43:48,502 --> 01:43:51,037
...to a bald and unconvincing narrative.
1636
01:43:51,271 --> 01:43:55,275
No, Barrington. An "otherwise" bald
and unconvincing narrative.
1637
01:43:55,509 --> 01:43:58,077
Was that incorrect? I do beg your pardon.
1638
01:43:58,312 --> 01:44:00,214
No, sir. It has only just occurred to me.
1639
01:44:00,482 --> 01:44:04,620
Oh! To an otherwise bald
and unconvincing narrative.
1640
01:44:04,855 --> 01:44:08,024
- Much better.
- Corrobatative detail indeed!
1641
01:44:08,258 --> 01:44:12,196
- Corroborative detail.
- Corrobatative.
1642
01:44:12,430 --> 01:44:15,132
- Corroborative.
- Corroborative.
1643
01:44:15,400 --> 01:44:17,468
- Corroborative.
- Corroborative.
1644
01:44:17,703 --> 01:44:19,103
Thank you.
1645
01:44:19,337 --> 01:44:21,238
Splendid!
1646
01:44:21,473 --> 01:44:23,308
Corroborative detail indeed!
1647
01:44:23,543 --> 01:44:25,745
Corroborative fiddlestick!
1648
01:44:25,978 --> 01:44:28,347
And "you're" just as bad as he is...
1649
01:44:28,581 --> 01:44:31,150
...with your cock-and-bull stories.
- Cock and "a" bull.
1650
01:44:31,385 --> 01:44:35,756
Cock and a bull about catching his eye.
1651
01:44:35,990 --> 01:44:38,627
- Line?
- And his whistling an air.
1652
01:44:38,861 --> 01:44:41,697
- And his whistling hair!
1653
01:44:41,965 --> 01:44:45,668
- Boiling oil, Grossmith. Melted lead.
- Beg pardon, sir.
1654
01:44:45,902 --> 01:44:48,839
About catching his eye,
and his whistling an air.
1655
01:44:49,072 --> 01:44:52,308
But that's so like you!
You must stick your oar in.
1656
01:44:52,542 --> 01:44:56,914
- You must put in your oar.
- Over again.
1657
01:44:57,149 --> 01:44:59,350
And "you're" just as bad as he is...
1658
01:44:59,584 --> 01:45:03,222
...with your cock-and-a-bull stories
about catching his eye...
1659
01:45:03,457 --> 01:45:05,257
...and his whistling an air.
1660
01:45:05,525 --> 01:45:08,361
But that's so like you.
You must put your oar in.
1661
01:45:08,595 --> 01:45:11,832
- You must put in your oar.
- Over again.
1662
01:45:12,066 --> 01:45:14,468
You're just as bad as he is,
with your cock-and-a-bull stories...
1663
01:45:14,702 --> 01:45:16,705
...about catching his eye
and his whistling an air!
1664
01:45:16,939 --> 01:45:18,908
But that's so like you.
You must put in your oar!
1665
01:45:19,141 --> 01:45:23,645
- But how about your big right arm?
- Yes, and your snickersnee.
1666
01:45:23,879 --> 01:45:26,415
Well, well, never mind that now.
1667
01:45:26,684 --> 01:45:30,120
There's only one thing to be done.
Nanki-Poo hasn't started yet.
1668
01:45:30,354 --> 01:45:34,425
He must come to life again at once!
1669
01:45:34,659 --> 01:45:36,493
Appear! Appear!
1670
01:45:36,762 --> 01:45:38,229
- ♪ Appear!
1671
01:45:38,463 --> 01:45:41,100
Yes, now. Since Nanki-Poo
and Yum-Yum have decided...
1672
01:45:41,367 --> 01:45:43,402
...not to grace us with their presence...
1673
01:45:43,636 --> 01:45:50,176
...it would transpire, Mr Seymour, that
your moment of glory has finally arrived.
1674
01:45:50,477 --> 01:45:53,547
On your feet, slopkins!
1675
01:46:00,188 --> 01:46:02,424
Whence would you like us
both to enter, sir?
1676
01:46:02,658 --> 01:46:06,162
The honeymoon couple appear
at the upstage right entrance...
1677
01:46:06,396 --> 01:46:10,033
...travelling in a westerly direction
towards Knightsbridge.
1678
01:46:10,267 --> 01:46:12,903
But your journey is interrupted
by Mr Grossmith.
1679
01:46:13,137 --> 01:46:14,438
- Mr Gilbert.
- Jessie.
1680
01:46:14,672 --> 01:46:17,342
- Might I use my stick?
- By all means. Are you troubled?
1681
01:46:17,610 --> 01:46:19,444
I'm quite all right, thank you.
1682
01:46:19,679 --> 01:46:21,847
- Well, well.
- Well, well.
1683
01:46:22,080 --> 01:46:24,183
Well, well, never mind that now!
1684
01:46:24,417 --> 01:46:26,185
There's only one thing to be done.
1685
01:46:26,420 --> 01:46:28,521
Nanki-Poo hasn't started yet.
1686
01:46:28,755 --> 01:46:31,591
He must come to life again... at once!
1687
01:46:31,825 --> 01:46:34,929
- Here he comes.
1688
01:46:35,162 --> 01:46:39,200
'Ere... Nanki-Poo!
1689
01:46:40,169 --> 01:46:43,105
I've good news for you. You're reprieved.
1690
01:46:43,339 --> 01:46:46,943
I beg your pardon, Mr Gilbert.
I have failed to provide a valise.
1691
01:46:47,177 --> 01:46:50,713
Indeed, Seymour. And you have also
failed to provide two actors.
1692
01:46:50,947 --> 01:46:54,085
Pray continue.
1693
01:46:54,419 --> 01:46:56,988
Oh! But it's too late!
1694
01:46:57,222 --> 01:46:59,324
- I'm a dead man and I'm off...
1695
01:46:59,559 --> 01:47:00,926
...for my honeymoon.
1696
01:47:01,160 --> 01:47:02,428
Uncanny, is it not?
1697
01:47:02,663 --> 01:47:07,433
Mr Seymour, please inform Mr Lely that
his services will no longer be required.
1698
01:47:07,667 --> 01:47:09,436
Thank you very much, sir.
1699
01:47:09,671 --> 01:47:11,639
Nonsense!
1700
01:47:11,873 --> 01:47:14,742
A terrible thing has 'appened.
You're the son of the Mikado!
1701
01:47:15,010 --> 01:47:17,912
A terrible thing "has" happened!
You've become a cockney!
1702
01:47:18,146 --> 01:47:21,482
I thought one would suggest
something of his lowly station...
1703
01:47:21,717 --> 01:47:23,519
...being a cheap tailor and all.
1704
01:47:23,753 --> 01:47:27,423
Rubbish! We're in Japan,
not Stepney or Bow. Do it properly.
1705
01:47:27,691 --> 01:47:29,526
Oh. Very well.
1706
01:47:29,760 --> 01:47:35,299
Nonsense. A terrible thing has happened.
It seems you're the son of the Mikado.
1707
01:47:35,567 --> 01:47:38,504
Yes! But that happened some time ago.
1708
01:47:38,771 --> 01:47:41,508
Is this a time for airy persiflidge?
1709
01:47:41,742 --> 01:47:43,142
Persiflage, Grossmith.
1710
01:47:43,410 --> 01:47:45,144
- Is it?
- It is.
1711
01:47:45,412 --> 01:47:47,914
Is this a time for airy persiflage?
1712
01:47:48,149 --> 01:47:49,784
Doesn't sound right to me.
1713
01:47:50,051 --> 01:47:52,486
Persiflage, mirage, fromage.
1714
01:47:52,720 --> 01:47:55,023
- Decoupage.
- Exactly.
1715
01:47:55,291 --> 01:47:57,360
Your father is here...
1716
01:47:57,593 --> 01:47:59,428
...and with Ka-tisha.
1717
01:47:59,662 --> 01:48:03,232
- Katisha.
- It amuses me to say Ka-tisha.
1718
01:48:03,467 --> 01:48:06,603
It doesn't amuse me, Grossmith.
Nor does it scan.
1719
01:48:06,837 --> 01:48:10,141
My father? And with Katisha?!
1720
01:48:10,408 --> 01:48:12,142
Yes, he wants you particularly.
1721
01:48:12,411 --> 01:48:16,315
So does she.
1722
01:48:17,116 --> 01:48:19,118
- Ooh, but he's married now!
1723
01:48:19,352 --> 01:48:21,920
But bless my heart,
what has that to do with it?
1724
01:48:22,155 --> 01:48:28,328
Katisha claims me in marriage, but I can't
marry her because I'm married already.
1725
01:48:28,562 --> 01:48:32,133
Consequently,
she will insist on my execution...
1726
01:48:32,367 --> 01:48:38,507
...and if I'm executed,
my wife will have to be buried alive.
1727
01:48:38,909 --> 01:48:41,344
You see our difficulty.
1728
01:48:41,612 --> 01:48:46,717
- Yes, I don't know what's to be done.
- Make as to leave. Stop him.
1729
01:48:46,851 --> 01:48:48,686
There's one chance for you.
1730
01:48:48,920 --> 01:48:51,655
If you could persuade
Katisha to marry you...
1731
01:48:51,889 --> 01:48:54,560
...she would have no further claim on me.
1732
01:48:54,794 --> 01:48:59,465
And in that case, I could come to life
without any fear of being put to death.
1733
01:48:59,732 --> 01:49:01,867
I? Marry Katisha?
1734
01:49:02,136 --> 01:49:05,371
I really think it's the only course.
1735
01:49:05,605 --> 01:49:08,609
My good girl, have you seen her?
She's something awful.
1736
01:49:08,843 --> 01:49:10,678
- Appalling.
- Something appalling.
1737
01:49:10,912 --> 01:49:13,447
Ah... that's only her "face".
1738
01:49:13,682 --> 01:49:15,517
Ah, that's "only" her face.
1739
01:49:15,750 --> 01:49:18,153
She has a left elbow
which people come miles to see.
1740
01:49:18,387 --> 01:49:21,590
I'm told her right heeeeel
is much admired by connoisseuuuurs.
1741
01:49:21,825 --> 01:49:25,596
Could we do that line again, Barrington?
This time, try it in English.
1742
01:49:25,829 --> 01:49:29,433
I'm told her right heel
is much admired by connoisseurs.
1743
01:49:29,668 --> 01:49:30,936
That better, sir?
1744
01:49:31,170 --> 01:49:32,570
Marginally.
1745
01:49:32,804 --> 01:49:37,676
My good sir, I decline to pin my heart
upon any lady's right heel.
1746
01:49:37,911 --> 01:49:39,847
Make as to leave.
1747
01:49:40,080 --> 01:49:41,481
Stop him.
1748
01:49:41,716 --> 01:49:47,922
It comes to this. While Katisha is single,
I prefer to be a disembodied spirit.
1749
01:49:48,156 --> 01:49:50,190
When Katisha is married...
1750
01:49:50,424 --> 01:49:53,695
...existence will be as welcome
as the flowers in spring.
1751
01:49:53,930 --> 01:49:55,031
Tra la.
1752
01:49:55,298 --> 01:49:58,199
Very good. Over again, if you please.
1753
01:50:07,679 --> 01:50:11,816
- And!
1754
01:50:45,289 --> 01:50:46,991
Thank you, gentlemen.
1755
01:50:47,259 --> 01:50:49,794
Not surprisingly...
1756
01:50:50,061 --> 01:50:54,967
...we were somewhat foxed
by the abbreviated, er... restatement.
1757
01:50:55,201 --> 01:50:57,770
Er... letter A.
1758
01:50:58,004 --> 01:51:00,974
Discord bordering on cacophony.
Second fiddles?
1759
01:51:01,209 --> 01:51:04,646
- Indeed, Sir Arthur.
- My mistake. I do beg your pardon.
1760
01:51:04,880 --> 01:51:07,315
- My error, sir.
- I suspect we were a trifle early.
1761
01:51:07,549 --> 01:51:10,219
Indeed you were, Mr Harris.
And more than a trifle.
1762
01:51:10,452 --> 01:51:12,321
I really don't mind whose mistake...
1763
01:51:12,555 --> 01:51:18,127
...it was, Mr Plank,
as long as it doesn't happen again.
1764
01:51:18,362 --> 01:51:22,833
The entry is on the third beat of the bar,
not the first. I think that's quite clear.
1765
01:51:23,100 --> 01:51:24,535
- Yes, sir.
- It is, sir, yes.
1766
01:51:24,770 --> 01:51:25,804
Very good.
1767
01:51:26,038 --> 01:51:29,441
And now, we return to Mr Hurley.
1768
01:51:29,675 --> 01:51:34,413
- Good morning, Mr Hurley!
- Good morning, Doctor Sullivan.
1769
01:51:34,881 --> 01:51:37,283
You was late, Mr 'Urley.
1770
01:51:39,687 --> 01:51:42,023
My profuse apologies to you, sir.
1771
01:51:42,257 --> 01:51:43,558
Thank you.
1772
01:51:43,792 --> 01:51:46,561
I assumed it to be an error
on the part of the copyist.
1773
01:51:46,795 --> 01:51:49,231
The second beat
of the previous bar appeared...
1774
01:51:49,499 --> 01:51:52,501
...to me to be masquerading
as the first beat of the next.
1775
01:51:52,735 --> 01:51:54,971
Most alarming! But it was not.
1776
01:51:55,205 --> 01:51:58,374
Oh, indeed not, for which I do apologise,
Doctor Sullivan.
1777
01:51:58,608 --> 01:52:01,978
Mr Hurley, once again -
saving your blushes, maestro -
1778
01:52:02,212 --> 01:52:05,115
...Dr Sullivan is dead. Long live Sir Arthur.
1779
01:52:05,383 --> 01:52:08,053
Thank you, Mr Cellier.
1780
01:52:08,286 --> 01:52:10,488
- Mr Tripp.
- Sir?
1781
01:52:10,723 --> 01:52:13,658
Owing to the somewhat
tardy entry of Mr Hurley...
1782
01:52:13,892 --> 01:52:16,128
...you, quite understandably,
followed suit.
1783
01:52:16,363 --> 01:52:17,264
Absolutely, sir.
1784
01:52:17,498 --> 01:52:21,968
So assuming that Mr Hurley "does" enter
at the correct place, you will too.
1785
01:52:22,203 --> 01:52:25,540
- Assuming he does, sir, I will, sir.
- Very good.
1786
01:52:25,774 --> 01:52:27,541
- Thank you, Mr Tripp!
- Thank you, sir.
1787
01:52:27,776 --> 01:52:30,646
- Capital! Er, gentlemen...
1788
01:52:30,880 --> 01:52:35,718
...once more from the beginning, please.
I shall give you one bar.
1789
01:52:39,924 --> 01:52:42,392
♪ A more humane Mikado never
1790
01:52:42,659 --> 01:52:44,494
♪ Did in Japan exist
1791
01:52:44,729 --> 01:52:49,769
♪ To nobody second I'm certainly
reckoned a true philanthropist
1792
01:52:50,002 --> 01:52:52,705
♪ It is my very humane endeavour
1793
01:52:52,939 --> 01:52:55,809
♪ To make, to some extent
1794
01:52:56,043 --> 01:52:57,877
♪ Each evil liver
1795
01:52:58,145 --> 01:53:00,280
♪ A running river
1796
01:53:00,514 --> 01:53:05,086
♪ Of harmless merriment
1797
01:53:05,320 --> 01:53:07,255
♪ My object all sublime
1798
01:53:07,489 --> 01:53:09,692
♪ I shall achieve in time
1799
01:53:09,926 --> 01:53:11,894
♪ To let the punishment fit the crime
1800
01:53:12,128 --> 01:53:14,096
♪ The punishment fit the crime
1801
01:53:14,330 --> 01:53:16,699
♪ And make each prisoner pent
1802
01:53:16,933 --> 01:53:18,835
♪ Unwillingly represent
1803
01:53:19,103 --> 01:53:21,538
♪ A source of innocent merriment
1804
01:53:21,772 --> 01:53:25,244
♪ Of innocent merriment
1805
01:53:28,280 --> 01:53:30,049
♪ The advertising quack
1806
01:53:30,283 --> 01:53:32,619
♪ Who wearies with tales
of countless cures
1807
01:53:32,853 --> 01:53:34,488
♪ His teeth, I've enacted
1808
01:53:34,722 --> 01:53:37,090
♪ Shall all be extracted
by terrified amateurs
1809
01:53:37,324 --> 01:53:39,459
♪ The music-hall singer attends a series
1810
01:53:39,693 --> 01:53:41,462
♪ Of masses and fugues and ops
1811
01:53:41,697 --> 01:53:43,932
♪ By Bach interwoven
with Spohr and Beethoven
1812
01:53:44,165 --> 01:53:46,134
♪ At classical Monday pops
1813
01:53:46,368 --> 01:53:48,304
♪ The billiard sharp
whom anyone catches
1814
01:53:48,538 --> 01:53:50,705
♪ His doom's extremely hard
1815
01:53:50,940 --> 01:53:54,577
♪ He's made to dwell in a dungeon cell
1816
01:53:54,812 --> 01:53:57,414
♪ On a spot that's always barred
1817
01:53:57,648 --> 01:53:59,650
♪ And there he plays extravagant matches
1818
01:53:59,884 --> 01:54:02,052
♪ In fitless fingerstalls
1819
01:54:02,287 --> 01:54:04,390
♪ On a cloth untrue
1820
01:54:04,624 --> 01:54:06,491
♪ With a twisted cue
1821
01:54:06,725 --> 01:54:13,534
♪ And elliptical billiard balls
1822
01:54:13,767 --> 01:54:15,902
♪ My object all sublime
1823
01:54:16,137 --> 01:54:18,305
♪ I shall achieve in time
1824
01:54:18,540 --> 01:54:20,441
♪ To let the punishment fit the crime
1825
01:54:20,708 --> 01:54:22,644
♪ The punishment fit the crime
1826
01:54:22,878 --> 01:54:24,847
♪ And make each prisoner pent
1827
01:54:25,081 --> 01:54:27,250
♪ Unwillingly represent
1828
01:54:27,483 --> 01:54:28,985
♪ A source of innocent merriment
1829
01:54:29,219 --> 01:54:31,488
♪ Of innocent merriment
1830
01:54:31,722 --> 01:54:33,690
♪ His object all sublime
1831
01:54:33,925 --> 01:54:35,758
♪ He will achieve in time
1832
01:54:36,026 --> 01:54:37,962
♪ To let the punishment fit the crime
1833
01:54:38,229 --> 01:54:40,198
♪ The punishment fit the crime
1834
01:54:40,465 --> 01:54:42,366
♪ And make each prisoner pent
1835
01:54:42,601 --> 01:54:44,569
♪ Unwillingly represent
1836
01:54:44,803 --> 01:54:46,638
♪ A source of innocent merriment
1837
01:54:46,906 --> 01:54:50,609
♪ Of innocent merriment
1838
01:54:54,616 --> 01:54:56,450
Did I say come in?
1839
01:54:56,685 --> 01:54:59,287
You are required in the auditorium,
Mr Grossmith.
1840
01:54:59,521 --> 01:55:02,290
I requested five minutes' grace.
1841
01:55:02,524 --> 01:55:03,959
You've had eight, sir.
1842
01:55:04,227 --> 01:55:08,765
- Mayn't it wait until tomorrow?
- No, sir.
1843
01:55:16,774 --> 01:55:20,244
Thank you, Miss Braham.
1844
01:55:21,546 --> 01:55:23,581
Is that everyone, Seymour?
1845
01:55:23,815 --> 01:55:25,984
- All present and correct, Mr Gilbert.
- Good.
1846
01:55:26,219 --> 01:55:29,088
I won't keep you, ladies and gentlemen.
1847
01:55:29,322 --> 01:55:34,094
We're all extremely tired
and looking forward to our beds.
1848
01:55:34,695 --> 01:55:37,765
Observations. The use of fans,
particularly in Act One...
1849
01:55:38,032 --> 01:55:39,634
...was flabby and erratic.
1850
01:55:39,868 --> 01:55:41,770
- Very scrappy.
- Indeed, D'Auban.
1851
01:55:42,004 --> 01:55:46,041
We shall address this tomorrow afternoon
at two o'clock, Seymour.
1852
01:55:46,309 --> 01:55:47,743
Two of the clock.
1853
01:55:47,978 --> 01:55:50,213
Ko-Ko's entrance.
Mr Kent and Mr Cunningham.
1854
01:55:50,447 --> 01:55:54,151
Please ensure that you do not flinch
at Mr Grossmith's sword.
1855
01:55:54,385 --> 01:55:57,788
You must have confidence that
he is not about to chop off your heads.
1856
01:55:58,022 --> 01:56:01,259
Even if it may appear
that that is your inevitable fate.
1857
01:56:01,493 --> 01:56:02,895
I take it, Mr Grossmith...
1858
01:56:03,129 --> 01:56:07,165
...that today's performance
was an aberration.
1859
01:56:07,934 --> 01:56:10,003
Grossmith!
1860
01:56:10,271 --> 01:56:13,173
I beg your pardon, sir.
Were you addressing me?
1861
01:56:13,407 --> 01:56:15,743
I was indeed, sir. How are you?
1862
01:56:15,977 --> 01:56:17,646
Quite well, thank you.
1863
01:56:17,912 --> 01:56:20,214
I believe a good night's sleep
will cure all ills.
1864
01:56:20,448 --> 01:56:22,283
That I took to be the case.
1865
01:56:22,551 --> 01:56:25,287
Your performances were,
on the whole, promising.
1866
01:56:25,555 --> 01:56:29,091
Which is more than can be said,
alas, for that of the sliding doors.
1867
01:56:30,994 --> 01:56:33,497
One of which might have
thought it was in Japan.
1868
01:56:33,731 --> 01:56:37,869
The other was labouring under the
delusion it was on holiday in Yorkshire.
1869
01:56:41,107 --> 01:56:43,409
- Where was the man?
- Rest assured, Mr Barker...
1870
01:56:43,643 --> 01:56:45,978
...that tomorrow night
he will be with us in Japan.
1871
01:56:46,212 --> 01:56:47,814
Capital.
1872
01:56:48,048 --> 01:56:51,151
Now. Cuts. There is only one.
1873
01:56:51,385 --> 01:56:56,024
In Act Two, the Mikado's song.
1874
01:56:58,627 --> 01:57:01,264
- I beg your pardon, Mr Gilbert?
- Yes, Miss Brandram.
1875
01:57:01,498 --> 01:57:04,334
Surely you can't mean Mr Temple's solo?
1876
01:57:04,568 --> 01:57:07,771
That is exactly what I mean.
1877
01:57:07,905 --> 01:57:10,807
- I do think that's a shame, sir.
- It's a dreadful shame.
1878
01:57:11,075 --> 01:57:14,544
Hear, hear.
1879
01:57:17,917 --> 01:57:19,419
- My dear Mr Gilbert.
- Temple.
1880
01:57:19,652 --> 01:57:24,156
I am fully aware that the standard of
my singing was not quite up to the mark.
1881
01:57:24,390 --> 01:57:26,393
Your singing was exemplary, Temple.
1882
01:57:26,627 --> 01:57:31,298
But I can assure you that once
I have mastered the leg business...
1883
01:57:31,532 --> 01:57:34,768
...I shall most certainly
be at liberty to serve the lyric.
1884
01:57:35,036 --> 01:57:37,472
I do apologise.
I have not made myself clear.
1885
01:57:37,706 --> 01:57:41,343
My decision to cut the song in no way
reflects upon your performance...
1886
01:57:41,577 --> 01:57:44,013
...which was fine in every respect.
1887
01:57:44,247 --> 01:57:47,216
Fault, if there is one,
lies in my obtuse decision...
1888
01:57:47,451 --> 01:57:49,654
...to write the thing in the first place.
1889
01:57:49,887 --> 01:57:52,957
I have nothing more to say.
Thank you very much. Sullivan?
1890
01:57:53,191 --> 01:57:56,327
Excuse me.
1891
01:58:03,570 --> 01:58:05,137
Ladies and gentlemen.
1892
01:58:05,371 --> 01:58:09,310
If I might presume to take
a few more moments of your time.
1893
01:58:09,544 --> 01:58:12,213
I should like to thank
you all most passionately...
1894
01:58:12,480 --> 01:58:16,451
...for your tremendous hard work and
application during these last few weeks.
1895
01:58:16,718 --> 01:58:18,453
And if I may say so...
1896
01:58:18,687 --> 01:58:21,457
...the contribution of the chorus
was particularly fine.
1897
01:58:21,691 --> 01:58:25,194
I'm immensely proud of you all.
1898
01:58:25,429 --> 01:58:27,597
I do not wish to tempt the fates...
1899
01:58:27,831 --> 01:58:32,136
...but I feel that we will have
a great success.
1900
01:58:32,370 --> 01:58:34,238
I have nothing further to add.
1901
01:58:34,473 --> 01:58:36,708
Only remember...
1902
01:58:36,941 --> 01:58:41,714
... voce, voce, voce. Buonanotte a tutti.
1903
01:58:41,815 --> 01:58:44,149
Now then, young fella-me-lads.
1904
01:58:44,383 --> 01:58:46,720
The Terpsichore was
executed magnifiquely...
1905
01:58:46,954 --> 01:58:50,624
...notwithstanding the Topsy-Turvydom
befuddling Mr Ko-Ko's entrance.
1906
01:58:50,859 --> 01:58:54,095
Otherwise,
♪ In the sea, in the sea, in the sea...
1907
01:58:54,329 --> 01:58:59,067
...fans out on sea, not in. Bonsoir.
1908
01:58:59,301 --> 01:59:01,271
Should any gent require a libation...
1909
01:59:01,505 --> 01:59:04,874
...I shall be shortly located
at The Coal Hole with Mr Johnny Ward.
1910
01:59:05,108 --> 01:59:07,411
Thank you, Johnny.
1911
01:59:07,679 --> 01:59:09,480
Excellent. "Bravissimi."
1912
01:59:09,714 --> 01:59:11,382
A splendid achievement.
1913
01:59:11,616 --> 01:59:13,450
Be confident...
1914
01:59:13,719 --> 01:59:15,553
...and may you have a good night's rest.
1915
01:59:15,787 --> 01:59:17,022
Miss Lenoir.
1916
01:59:17,256 --> 01:59:19,492
My thanks and congratulations to you all.
1917
01:59:19,758 --> 01:59:22,595
To hasten you to your slumbers,
cabs have been ordered...
1918
01:59:22,829 --> 01:59:25,933
...and will meet you at the stage door
as soon as you are ready.
1919
01:59:26,200 --> 01:59:29,737
Please share a cab with a neighbour.
Remember, we're not made of money.
1920
01:59:29,971 --> 01:59:33,675
Thank you, ladies and gentlemen.
1921
01:59:38,881 --> 01:59:40,783
- I felt so terrible.
- Oh, so did I!
1922
01:59:41,017 --> 01:59:43,820
My heart broke for him.
I can't bear to see a man cry.
1923
01:59:44,054 --> 01:59:45,855
- Was he crying?
- He was crushed.
1924
01:59:46,124 --> 01:59:48,060
- Really sad.
- And he's so awfully funny!
1925
01:59:48,293 --> 01:59:50,594
Some people only come
to see Mr Temple perform.
1926
01:59:50,828 --> 01:59:54,633
My cousins are always asking about him.
They already have their tickets.
1927
01:59:54,867 --> 01:59:58,637
- They'll want their money back now!
- There are other people in this piece!
1928
01:59:58,871 --> 02:00:00,706
He's hardly in it now, though, is he?
1929
02:00:00,940 --> 02:00:03,710
- He's playing the Mikado.
- Thank you, Violet!
1930
02:00:03,944 --> 02:00:06,146
- Will you be long, Catherine?
- No, I shan't.
1931
02:00:06,381 --> 02:00:08,015
I wish we could do something.
1932
02:00:08,283 --> 02:00:10,785
There ain't.
Mr Gilbert's decided and that's that.
1933
02:00:11,019 --> 02:00:14,389
With Mr Gilbert, one never knows.
Particularly before a first night.
1934
02:00:14,623 --> 02:00:16,625
I suggest we get a good night's sleep.
1935
02:00:16,859 --> 02:00:18,694
Absolutely. I'm certainly off.
1936
02:00:18,963 --> 02:00:21,198
I think you should all
mind your own business.
1937
02:00:21,431 --> 02:00:24,634
- Good night!
- That was a little uncalled-for!
1938
02:00:24,868 --> 02:00:28,938
Good night, girls!
I don't want to be late for supper.
1939
02:00:29,173 --> 02:00:30,975
Oh, Bunny, you look charming!
1940
02:00:31,243 --> 02:00:33,646
It's a fine comic song.
He sings it splendidly.
1941
02:00:33,880 --> 02:00:36,282
Does the paying audience
not deserve to hear it?
1942
02:00:36,516 --> 02:00:38,217
I agree, Walter. They do.
1943
02:00:38,485 --> 02:00:40,320
Rotten luck for poor old Temple.
1944
02:00:40,554 --> 02:00:44,156
- I'm not convinced it's an immortal song.
- Nobody said it was, Mr Lewis!
1945
02:00:44,391 --> 02:00:46,160
It's not the Holy Grail!
1946
02:00:46,394 --> 02:00:48,797
Despite your reservations
about the song...
1947
02:00:49,031 --> 02:00:51,566
...you must concede
it is an original performance.
1948
02:00:51,801 --> 02:00:53,869
He should have cut
one of Grossmith's songs.
1949
02:00:54,103 --> 02:00:57,040
- Mr Grossmith is poorly.
- Then he should have stayed at home.
1950
02:00:57,273 --> 02:01:00,242
I think it's a misjudgement.
Someone should tell him.
1951
02:01:00,477 --> 02:01:02,145
- Tell who?
- Gilbert.
1952
02:01:02,379 --> 02:01:05,282
- He's only a man, like the rest of us.
1953
02:01:05,516 --> 02:01:07,351
He's not the devil incarnate.
1954
02:01:07,586 --> 02:01:09,654
He scares the living daylights out of me.
1955
02:01:09,921 --> 02:01:12,790
- What about us?
- Beg pardon, Price?
1956
02:01:13,024 --> 02:01:15,994
- Why can't "we" speak to Mr Gilbert?
1957
02:01:16,229 --> 02:01:19,299
Well, we could all go together.
1958
02:01:19,567 --> 02:01:22,235
There's no reason why we shouldn't.
1959
02:01:22,469 --> 02:01:23,705
Is there?
1960
02:01:23,939 --> 02:01:27,241
Tell a man you admire his lyrics,
he can only be gratified.
1961
02:01:27,475 --> 02:01:29,577
It's a splendid notion, Mr Price.
1962
02:01:29,844 --> 02:01:31,880
Well, here's food for thought.
1963
02:01:32,114 --> 02:01:36,719
Gentlemen, I have been a chorister
in this company for 28 seasons.
1964
02:01:36,953 --> 02:01:39,856
It is my intention to remain one
for at least another 28.
1965
02:01:40,124 --> 02:01:42,793
- I'm sure you shall.
- Be very careful, Mr Price.
1966
02:01:42,128 --> 02:01:44,862
You must consider yourself...
1967
02:01:45,128 --> 02:01:46,797
...and your position.
1968
02:01:47,031 --> 02:01:49,267
This is tantamount
to professional suicide.
1969
02:01:49,501 --> 02:01:51,335
Oh, WJ, that is a little excessive...
1970
02:01:51,604 --> 02:01:55,008
Gentlemen, let us repair
to The Coal Hole in the Strand.
1971
02:01:55,242 --> 02:01:57,977
Don't be long, chaps.
1972
02:01:58,245 --> 02:02:00,347
- Good night, gentlemen.
- Good night.
1973
02:02:00,581 --> 02:02:02,316
- Take heart.
- You'll be wonderful.
1974
02:02:02,550 --> 02:02:03,384
Quite so.
1975
02:02:03,618 --> 02:02:05,920
Is that not right, wee Durward?
1976
02:02:06,154 --> 02:02:07,922
Ach, he'll be grand, Helen.
1977
02:02:08,156 --> 02:02:10,125
This has taken us all quite by surprise.
1978
02:02:10,359 --> 02:02:12,995
And we all know Mr Gilbert.
1979
02:02:13,229 --> 02:02:15,364
- I'd have thought it was a fine song.
- It is.
1980
02:02:15,598 --> 02:02:16,433
Thank you.
1981
02:02:16,667 --> 02:02:20,871
Is there anything
we can arrange for you, Mr Temple?
1982
02:02:21,105 --> 02:02:23,140
No, thank you, Miss Lenoir.
1983
02:02:23,408 --> 02:02:26,144
I'll be fine.
1984
02:02:26,378 --> 02:02:28,446
It's very late. Congratulations, Lely.
1985
02:02:28,680 --> 02:02:32,284
- First class.
- Ach, no. Did you think so?
1986
02:02:32,518 --> 02:02:33,953
- Oh, yes.
- Better and better.
1987
02:02:34,188 --> 02:02:36,022
Thank you. Grazie. Grazie.
1988
02:02:36,288 --> 02:02:38,190
- The Beefsteak?
- I'm ravenous.
1989
02:02:38,425 --> 02:02:40,527
- Gentlemen, good night.
- Good night.
1990
02:02:40,761 --> 02:02:42,729
- Good night, Butt!
- Good night.
1991
02:02:42,963 --> 02:02:46,467
Dickie! Courage.
1992
02:02:50,672 --> 02:02:54,310
Well, there you have it, Dickie.
1993
02:02:54,544 --> 02:02:58,448
He's an absolute bastard.
1994
02:02:58,682 --> 02:03:00,951
I knew something of this order
would happen.
1995
02:03:01,185 --> 02:03:04,189
I sensed it, I told you so!
1996
02:03:04,423 --> 02:03:08,460
This really is unconscionably cruel.
1997
02:03:08,727 --> 02:03:12,598
You've missed your last train, Dickie.
1998
02:03:12,732 --> 02:03:15,167
It's too late to telegraph
the Mrs Temple now.
1999
02:03:15,401 --> 02:03:17,236
What'll you do?
2000
02:03:17,471 --> 02:03:23,612
I suppose I shall toddle across the river
to my mother's. She never sleeps.
2001
02:03:25,047 --> 02:03:27,514
"There's g'aye(damn) few like us...
2002
02:03:27,748 --> 02:03:30,852
...and they're all deed."(dead)
2003
02:03:31,086 --> 02:03:32,921
My father used to say that.
2004
02:03:33,156 --> 02:03:34,990
Laughter.
2005
02:03:35,224 --> 02:03:37,093
Tears.
2006
02:03:37,328 --> 02:03:40,798
Curtain.
2007
02:03:49,041 --> 02:03:51,810
- Good afternoon, Bovill.
- Good afternoon, Mr Gilbert.
2008
02:03:52,044 --> 02:03:54,880
- Good afternoon.
- Good afternoon, Miss Russell.
2009
02:03:55,115 --> 02:03:57,551
Good afternoon, Rhys... Good heavens!
2010
02:03:57,785 --> 02:03:59,886
- Afternoon, Mr Gilbert.
- Good afternoon.
2011
02:04:00,120 --> 02:04:03,758
- Might you, er... spare us a moment?
- Of course, we're here to rehearse!
2012
02:04:03,992 --> 02:04:06,794
- Please, Mr Gilbert, sir.
- Yes, Price, what is it?
2013
02:04:07,029 --> 02:04:10,467
- We, er...
- Hmm?!
2014
02:04:10,600 --> 02:04:15,071
The... ladies and gentlemen
of the chorus...
2015
02:04:15,306 --> 02:04:17,174
Yes?
2016
02:04:17,407 --> 02:04:21,678
Concerning Mr Temple's song, sir.
2017
02:04:21,913 --> 02:04:24,315
Ah, the Mikado's song.
2018
02:04:24,549 --> 02:04:25,750
Yes, sir.
2019
02:04:25,984 --> 02:04:28,152
What of that mercifully
released aberration?
2020
02:04:28,387 --> 02:04:32,993
- We all consider it... a very fine song, sir.
- Indeed we do.
2021
02:04:33,227 --> 02:04:34,894
Gratifying, I'm sure.
2022
02:04:35,128 --> 02:04:37,598
That must be a matter of opinion,
mustn't it, Price?
2023
02:04:37,832 --> 02:04:42,169
Well, yes, Mr Gilbert,
but we believe it a great loss.
2024
02:04:42,403 --> 02:04:44,572
- Do you?
- Yes, sir.
2025
02:04:44,807 --> 02:04:48,010
Especially after all our
extremely hard work.
2026
02:04:48,244 --> 02:04:50,146
And, of course, Mr Temple.
2027
02:04:50,413 --> 02:04:54,151
I'm really very sorry for you,
but as we all know, it's an unjust world.
2028
02:04:54,384 --> 02:04:57,353
We all feel it would have been
of great benefit to the opera.
2029
02:04:57,588 --> 02:04:59,924
And that perhaps
the audience should decide.
2030
02:05:00,158 --> 02:05:02,394
Is this the considered opinion of you all?
2031
02:05:02,627 --> 02:05:04,296
It is, sir.
2032
02:05:04,530 --> 02:05:07,433
- I am not party to this, Mr Gilbert.
- Ah, Mr Kent.
2033
02:05:07,667 --> 02:05:11,571
As ever, the sole voice of reason.
2034
02:05:11,805 --> 02:05:14,809
Temple, what do you make
of this occurrence?
2035
02:05:15,043 --> 02:05:16,877
I do beg your pardon, Mr Gilbert.
2036
02:05:17,111 --> 02:05:20,881
But I have absolutely no idea
what is taking place.
2037
02:05:21,115 --> 02:05:25,287
There has been a request
that your song be reinstated.
2038
02:05:25,521 --> 02:05:27,355
Ah.
2039
02:05:27,589 --> 02:05:29,692
Ah.
2040
02:05:29,926 --> 02:05:32,195
A most forceful request, I have to say.
2041
02:05:32,429 --> 02:05:33,998
Afternoon!
2042
02:05:34,232 --> 02:05:35,733
Do clear the way.
2043
02:05:35,967 --> 02:05:37,469
Oh. I beg your pardon, sir.
2044
02:05:37,734 --> 02:05:42,606
This is surprising indeed,
ladies and gentlemen.
2045
02:05:43,876 --> 02:05:47,346
And somewhat overwhelming.
2046
02:05:50,250 --> 02:05:54,888
Temple. Would you be prepared to sing
the song at this evening's performance?
2047
02:05:55,122 --> 02:05:58,325
Yes, sir. I would.
2048
02:06:09,339 --> 02:06:12,074
Then please be so good as to do so.
2049
02:06:12,309 --> 02:06:15,379
- Hip-hip...
2050
02:06:15,613 --> 02:06:17,815
- Hooray!
- Rehearsals in five minutes.
2051
02:06:18,049 --> 02:06:19,816
Seymour, where's D'Auban?
2052
02:06:20,051 --> 02:06:24,890
- Congratulations, Temple.
- Thank you, good chappie.
2053
02:06:25,525 --> 02:06:28,093
Right you are, Pidgeon!
Come along! Make haste!
2054
02:06:28,328 --> 02:06:31,931
- Sir, it's seven o'clock, sir.
- Ah, there you are, Willie.
2055
02:06:32,165 --> 02:06:34,968
Willie! Willie!!
2056
02:06:35,202 --> 02:06:37,872
The carriage is waiting, sir.
2057
02:06:38,139 --> 02:06:40,776
Sir!
2058
02:06:41,010 --> 02:06:43,578
- Out of my way, Pidgeon!
- I do apologise, sir.
2059
02:06:43,812 --> 02:06:48,351
Willie! We must be leaving!
2060
02:06:48,651 --> 02:06:50,953
We don't want to be late.
2061
02:06:51,221 --> 02:06:54,325
- You look beautiful, madam.
- Oh, thank you, Mrs Judd.
2062
02:06:54,559 --> 02:06:56,994
Oh, it's most pleasant to be appreciated.
2063
02:06:57,261 --> 02:07:00,365
Don't worry, madam.
2064
02:07:12,111 --> 02:07:15,916
- Good evening, Cook.
- Evening, sir.
2065
02:07:17,553 --> 02:07:19,821
- Come in!
2066
02:07:20,054 --> 02:07:23,324
- GG!
- Arthur!
2067
02:07:23,559 --> 02:07:25,795
- Your very good health.
- Yours too, Arthur.
2068
02:07:26,063 --> 02:07:28,198
- Splendid piece.
- Thank you.
2069
02:07:28,432 --> 02:07:30,567
We shall both be splendid tonight.
2070
02:07:30,801 --> 02:07:32,636
Too many words.
2071
02:07:32,871 --> 02:07:37,174
- I thought I'd just pop in.
- Much appreciated.
2072
02:07:37,275 --> 02:07:39,311
So very frightened of losing...
2073
02:07:39,578 --> 02:07:42,013
One had to stay by the door,
don't you know?
2074
02:07:42,247 --> 02:07:45,818
- I beg your pardon?
- £50 per week isn't too much to ask.
2075
02:07:46,052 --> 02:07:48,121
Behaves more like a man than a woman.
2076
02:07:48,355 --> 02:07:49,689
GG.
2077
02:07:49,923 --> 02:07:53,093
- Try to remember to breathe properly.
- Yes, yes, yes.
2078
02:07:53,328 --> 02:07:55,564
This year... next year.
2079
02:07:55,797 --> 02:07:57,631
Too much noise.
2080
02:07:57,899 --> 02:08:00,803
George. Shall we fetch you a doctor?
2081
02:08:01,037 --> 02:08:02,804
I know doctors!
2082
02:08:03,039 --> 02:08:05,375
Coming in here,
picking and fussing over one!
2083
02:08:05,608 --> 02:08:08,377
Magnetising the children.
2084
02:08:08,612 --> 02:08:11,716
We shall have a great triumph, you know.
2085
02:08:11,983 --> 02:08:15,454
What is the time, by the way?
2086
02:08:16,754 --> 02:08:19,490
A quarter past.
The dreaded hour approaches.
2087
02:08:19,724 --> 02:08:21,393
Now...
2088
02:08:21,660 --> 02:08:25,132
Take a deep breath.
2089
02:08:29,770 --> 02:08:31,738
Very good.
2090
02:08:31,972 --> 02:08:33,574
- Who is it?
- Gilbert.
2091
02:08:33,808 --> 02:08:36,377
Do come in, Mr Gilbert.
2092
02:08:36,612 --> 02:08:39,381
- A brief intrusion.
- How are you, Mr Gilbert?
2093
02:08:39,615 --> 02:08:41,851
As well as any condemned man
can expect.
2094
02:08:42,084 --> 02:08:46,021
- How are you, ladies?
- Oh, a little anxious, Mr Gilbert.
2095
02:08:46,255 --> 02:08:49,260
You have every right to be anxious
under the circumstances.
2096
02:08:49,493 --> 02:08:51,796
I don't suppose
you'll be with us this evening.
2097
02:08:52,063 --> 02:08:54,866
Indeed not. Why on earth
should I consort with the foe?
2098
02:08:55,100 --> 02:08:58,336
Oh, but I'm quite sure
we shall have a great success, Mr Gilbert.
2099
02:08:58,570 --> 02:09:00,739
I wish I possessed your confidence.
2100
02:09:00,974 --> 02:09:02,608
Well, Jessie!
2101
02:09:02,842 --> 02:09:04,044
Bonne chance!
2102
02:09:04,278 --> 02:09:06,446
- Thank you.
- And you, tortoise.
2103
02:09:06,680 --> 02:09:09,383
Thank you, Mr Gilbert.
2104
02:09:09,617 --> 02:09:12,887
Very good.
2105
02:09:14,289 --> 02:09:16,692
I shall put on my kimono now,
please, Emily.
2106
02:09:16,926 --> 02:09:20,396
Oh! Very well, Miss Braham.
2107
02:09:27,371 --> 02:09:28,907
- Good evening, Cook.
- Sir.
2108
02:09:29,140 --> 02:09:31,743
- Is Mr Grossmith respectable?
- I'm afraid not, sir.
2109
02:09:31,977 --> 02:09:37,082
- We'll return later, George.
- Oh, thank you.
2110
02:09:38,517 --> 02:09:40,586
- Good evening.
- Sir.
2111
02:09:40,820 --> 02:09:42,055
No, Cookie!
2112
02:09:42,288 --> 02:09:44,056
- Gilbert!
- I beg your pardon, sir.
2113
02:09:44,291 --> 02:09:45,559
May I come in?
2114
02:09:45,826 --> 02:09:47,628
I'm in my birthday suit.
2115
02:09:47,862 --> 02:09:50,797
- Ah. Are we not receiving?
- No, sir.
2116
02:09:51,065 --> 02:09:53,802
Good luck, Grossmith!
And be careful with the sword.
2117
02:09:54,069 --> 02:09:54,803
Righto!
2118
02:09:55,071 --> 02:09:57,238
- Walk, boy!
- Yes, sir.
2119
02:09:57,506 --> 02:09:58,973
Permission, Mr Cook.
2120
02:09:59,208 --> 02:10:01,043
Permission withheld, sir. On your way.
2121
02:10:01,277 --> 02:10:04,247
Thank you, sir. Good luck, sir.
2122
02:10:04,481 --> 02:10:07,784
Five minutes, sir.
2122.5
02:10:29,481 --> 02:10:32,784
[Miya-sama, miya-sama]
Military march melody
"Ton-yare Bushi"
2123
02:10:46,330 --> 02:10:49,067
♪ Miya-sama, miya-sama
(Oh noble Prince,...)
2124
02:10:49,301 --> 02:10:52,170
♪ On-uma no mae ni
(that thing in front of your horse...)
2125
02:10:52,404 --> 02:10:55,306
♪ Pira pira suru no wa
(...fluttering around,...)
2126
02:10:55,541 --> 02:10:58,944
♪ Nan ja na?
(...what is it?)
2127
02:10:59,178 --> 02:11:06,085
♪ Tokoton yare -ton yare na!
(onomatopes like Tarantara)
2128
02:11:14,162 --> 02:11:16,731
♪ Miya-sama, miya-sama
2129
02:11:16,966 --> 02:11:20,069
♪ On-uma no mae ni
2130
02:11:20,303 --> 02:11:23,073
♪ Pira pira suru no wa
2131
02:11:23,307 --> 02:11:26,577
♪ Nan ja na?
2132
02:11:26,811 --> 02:11:33,418
♪ Tokoton yare -ton yare na!
2133
02:11:47,135 --> 02:11:49,171
♪ From every kind of man
2134
02:11:49,404 --> 02:11:53,175
♪ Obedience I expect
2135
02:11:53,410 --> 02:11:55,511
♪ I'm the Emperor of Japan
2136
02:11:55,745 --> 02:11:59,182
♪ And I'm his daughter-in-law elect
2137
02:11:59,416 --> 02:12:00,650
♪ He'll marry his son
2138
02:12:00,884 --> 02:12:02,820
♪ He's only got one
2139
02:12:03,054 --> 02:12:05,289
♪ To his daughter-in-law elect
2140
02:12:05,523 --> 02:12:07,425
♪ My morals have been declared
2141
02:12:07,659 --> 02:12:11,330
♪ Particularly correct
2142
02:12:11,564 --> 02:12:12,831
♪ But they're nothing at all
2143
02:12:13,065 --> 02:12:17,503
♪ Compared with those
of his daughter-in-law elect
2144
02:12:17,738 --> 02:12:19,372
♪ Bow!
2145
02:12:19,606 --> 02:12:20,473
♪ Bow
2146
02:12:20,707 --> 02:12:23,977
♪ To his daughter-in-law elect
2147
02:12:24,211 --> 02:12:26,247
♪ Bow! Bow!
2148
02:12:26,514 --> 02:12:31,252
♪ To his daughter-in-law elect
2149
02:12:39,463 --> 02:12:41,498
♪ In a fatherly kind of way
2150
02:12:41,732 --> 02:12:44,668
♪ I govern each tribe and sect
2151
02:12:44,902 --> 02:12:47,104
♪ All cheerfully own my sway
2152
02:12:47,339 --> 02:12:50,975
♪ Except his daughter-in-law elect
2153
02:12:51,210 --> 02:12:52,645
♪ As tough as a bone
2154
02:12:52,911 --> 02:12:54,213
♪ With a will of her own
2155
02:12:54,447 --> 02:12:57,116
♪ Is his daughter-in-law elect
2156
02:12:57,350 --> 02:12:59,485
♪ My nature is love and light
2157
02:12:59,753 --> 02:13:03,191
♪ My freedom from all defect
2158
02:13:03,425 --> 02:13:05,492
♪ Is insignificant quite
2159
02:13:05,726 --> 02:13:09,497
♪ Compared with his daughter-in-law elect
2160
02:13:09,731 --> 02:13:12,534
♪ Bow! Bow!
2161
02:13:12,768 --> 02:13:15,737
♪ To his daughter-in-law elect
2162
02:13:15,972 --> 02:13:18,475
♪ Bow! Bow!
2163
02:13:18,709 --> 02:13:23,380
♪ To his daughter-in-law elect
2164
02:13:36,229 --> 02:13:38,665
♪ A more humane Mikado never
2165
02:13:38,898 --> 02:13:42,436
♪ Did in Japan exist
2166
02:13:53,750 --> 02:13:55,585
- Get off!
- Be good, be good.
2167
02:13:55,819 --> 02:13:57,754
- What are you do...?
- I'm good, I'm good.
2168
02:13:57,988 --> 02:14:01,492
- Get your hands off me!
- Oh, don't rub your smell off on me!
2169
02:14:01,759 --> 02:14:05,629
You stinking bitch!
Just let me go, you cow!
2170
02:14:05,863 --> 02:14:09,334
- Oh, you're a lovely big boy!
- Don't touch me!
2171
02:14:09,568 --> 02:14:15,041
Who made the world, arsehole?!
2172
02:14:24,954 --> 02:14:28,424
♪ The criminal cried
as he dropped him down
2173
02:14:28,657 --> 02:14:31,660
♪ In a state of wild alarm
2174
02:14:31,894 --> 02:14:35,498
♪ With a frightful frantic fearful frown
2175
02:14:35,732 --> 02:14:38,836
♪ I bared my big right arm
2176
02:14:39,070 --> 02:14:42,506
♪ I seized him by his little pigtail
2177
02:14:42,739 --> 02:14:44,574
♪ And on his knees
2178
02:14:44,809 --> 02:14:46,278
♪ Fell he
2179
02:14:46,512 --> 02:14:49,681
♪ As he squirmed and struggled
and gurgled and guggled
2180
02:14:49,915 --> 02:14:54,220
♪ I drew my snickersnee
2181
02:14:54,455 --> 02:14:58,826
♪ My snickersnee
2182
02:14:59,060 --> 02:15:01,896
♪ Never shall I forget the cry
2183
02:15:02,164 --> 02:15:06,133
♪ Or the shriek that shriek-ed he
2184
02:15:06,402 --> 02:15:09,105
♪ As I gnashed my teeth
when from its sheath
2185
02:15:09,338 --> 02:15:12,441
♪ I drew my snickersnee
2186
02:15:12,675 --> 02:15:13,976
♪ We know him well
2187
02:15:14,211 --> 02:15:16,013
♪ He cannot tell
2188
02:15:16,280 --> 02:15:19,582
♪ Untrue or groundless tales
2189
02:15:19,817 --> 02:15:23,255
♪ He always tries to utter lies
2190
02:15:23,521 --> 02:15:26,625
♪ And every time he fails
2191
02:15:26,858 --> 02:15:30,296
♪ He shivered and shook
as he gave the sign
2192
02:15:30,562 --> 02:15:33,899
♪ For the stroke he didn't deserve
2193
02:15:34,134 --> 02:15:35,535
♪ When all of a sudden
2194
02:15:35,802 --> 02:15:37,270
♪ His eye met mine
2195
02:15:37,505 --> 02:15:40,775
♪ And it seemed to brace his nerve
2196
02:15:41,042 --> 02:15:42,475
♪ For he nodded his head
2197
02:15:42,710 --> 02:15:44,545
♪ And kissed his hand
2198
02:15:44,779 --> 02:15:47,716
♪ And he whistled an air, did he
2199
02:15:47,950 --> 02:15:49,952
♪ As the sabre true
2200
02:15:50,186 --> 02:15:51,754
♪ Cut cleanly through
2201
02:15:51,988 --> 02:15:56,227
♪ His cervical vertebrae
2202
02:15:56,461 --> 02:16:00,865
♪ His vertebrae
2203
02:16:01,099 --> 02:16:02,668
♪ When a man's afraid
2204
02:16:02,902 --> 02:16:04,269
♪ A beautiful maid
2205
02:16:04,502 --> 02:16:07,839
♪ Is a cheering sight to see
2206
02:16:08,074 --> 02:16:09,676
♪ And it's oh, I'm glad
2207
02:16:09,910 --> 02:16:11,344
♪ That moment sad
2208
02:16:11,578 --> 02:16:14,814
♪ Was soothed by sight of me
2209
02:16:15,082 --> 02:16:16,684
♪ Her terrible tale
2210
02:16:16,917 --> 02:16:18,652
♪ You can't assail
2211
02:16:18,921 --> 02:16:21,956
♪ With truth it quite agrees
2212
02:16:22,190 --> 02:16:23,826
♪ Her taste exact
2213
02:16:24,060 --> 02:16:25,494
♪ For faultless fact
2214
02:16:25,761 --> 02:16:29,064
♪ Amounts to a disease
2215
02:16:29,299 --> 02:16:30,834
♪ Now though you'd have said
2216
02:16:31,067 --> 02:16:32,435
♪ That head was dead
2217
02:16:32,670 --> 02:16:36,073
♪ For its owner dead was he
2218
02:16:36,306 --> 02:16:37,641
♪ It stood on its neck
2219
02:16:37,876 --> 02:16:39,545
♪ With a smile well-bred
2220
02:16:39,778 --> 02:16:42,380
♪ And bowed three times to me!
2221
02:16:42,647 --> 02:16:46,084
♪ It was none of
your impudent offhand nods
2222
02:16:46,318 --> 02:16:49,788
♪ But as humble as could be
2223
02:16:50,022 --> 02:16:51,790
♪ For it clearly knew
2224
02:16:52,025 --> 02:16:53,527
♪ The deference due
2225
02:16:53,760 --> 02:16:57,998
♪ To a man of pedigree
2226
02:16:58,232 --> 02:17:02,504
♪ Of pedigree
2227
02:17:02,738 --> 02:17:04,439
♪ And it's oh, I vow
2228
02:17:04,673 --> 02:17:06,441
♪ This deathly bow
2229
02:17:06,676 --> 02:17:09,178
♪ Was a touching sight to see
2230
02:17:09,446 --> 02:17:11,181
♪ Though trunkless yet
2231
02:17:11,448 --> 02:17:12,748
♪ It couldn't forget
2232
02:17:12,983 --> 02:17:16,353
♪ The deference due to me
2233
02:17:16,588 --> 02:17:18,122
♪ This haughty youth
2234
02:17:18,356 --> 02:17:20,024
♪ He speaks the truth
2235
02:17:20,258 --> 02:17:23,462
♪ Whenever he finds it pays
2236
02:17:23,729 --> 02:17:25,064
♪ And in this case
2237
02:17:25,299 --> 02:17:26,866
♪ It all took place
2238
02:17:27,099 --> 02:17:29,402
♪ Exactly as he says
2239
02:17:29,636 --> 02:17:32,273
♪ Exactly, exactly, exactly
2240
02:17:32,507 --> 02:17:41,816
♪ Exactly as he says
2241
02:17:53,630 --> 02:17:56,433
- ♪ For he's gone and married Yum-Yum
- ♪ Yum-Yum
2242
02:17:56,668 --> 02:17:58,436
♪ Your anger pray bury
for all will be merry
2243
02:17:58,670 --> 02:18:00,906
- ♪ I think you had better succumb
- ♪ Cumb-cumb
2244
02:18:01,140 --> 02:18:03,008
♪ And join our expressions of glee
2245
02:18:03,242 --> 02:18:05,376
- ♪ On this subject I pray you be dumb
- ♪ Dumb-dumb
2246
02:18:05,645 --> 02:18:07,714
♪ Your notions, though many
are not worth a penny
2247
02:18:07,948 --> 02:18:10,184
- ♪ The word for your guidance is mum
- ♪ Mum-mum
2248
02:18:10,451 --> 02:18:12,285
♪ You've a very good bargain in me
2249
02:18:12,519 --> 02:18:14,755
♪ On this subject we pray
you be dumb, dumb-dumb
2250
02:18:14,989 --> 02:18:16,992
♪ We think you had better
succumb, cumb-cumb
2251
02:18:17,226 --> 02:18:18,794
♪ You'll find there are many
2252
02:18:19,027 --> 02:18:21,329
♪ Who'll wed for a penny,
who'll wed for a penny
2253
02:18:21,563 --> 02:18:23,432
♪ There are lots of good fish in the sea
2254
02:18:23,666 --> 02:18:25,768
♪ There are lots of good fish in the sea
2255
02:18:26,002 --> 02:18:27,903
♪ There's lots of good fish,
good fish in the sea
2256
02:18:28,171 --> 02:18:30,607
♪ There's lots of good fish,
good fish in the sea
2257
02:18:30,841 --> 02:18:33,945
♪ In the sea, in the sea, in the sea
2258
02:18:34,078 --> 02:18:36,114
♪ The threatened cloud has passed away
2259
02:18:36,348 --> 02:18:37,483
♪ And fairly shines the dawning day
2260
02:18:37,716 --> 02:18:38,916
♪ What though the night
may come too soon
2261
02:18:39,151 --> 02:18:40,985
♪ We've years and years of afternoon
2262
02:18:41,220 --> 02:18:44,623
♪ Then let the throng our joy advance
2263
02:18:44,891 --> 02:18:48,194
♪ With laughing song and merry dance
2264
02:18:48,429 --> 02:18:50,196
♪ Then let the throng our joy advance
2265
02:18:50,430 --> 02:18:51,765
♪ With laughing song and merry dance
2266
02:18:51,999 --> 02:18:53,801
♪ With laughing song and merry dance
2267
02:18:54,035 --> 02:18:57,071
♪ With laughing song
2268
02:18:57,305 --> 02:18:58,740
♪ With joyous shout
2269
02:18:59,007 --> 02:19:00,808
♪ With joyous shout and ringing cheer
2270
02:19:01,043 --> 02:19:04,246
♪ Inaugurate, inaugurate their new career
2271
02:19:04,480 --> 02:19:06,048
♪ With joyous shout and ringing cheer
2272
02:19:06,282 --> 02:19:07,650
♪ Inaugurate their new career
2273
02:19:07,884 --> 02:19:09,520
♪ With joyous shout and ringing cheer
2274
02:19:09,754 --> 02:19:11,288
♪ Inaugurate their new career
2275
02:19:11,522 --> 02:19:13,023
♪ With laughing song and merry dance
2276
02:19:13,291 --> 02:19:15,527
♪ With laughing song and merry dance
2277
02:19:15,760 --> 02:19:17,662
♪ With song
2278
02:19:17,930 --> 02:19:22,868
♪ And dance
2279
02:20:08,055 --> 02:20:11,527
Pish, Peep!
2280
02:20:15,129 --> 02:20:17,132
Mikado!
2281
02:20:22,872 --> 02:20:24,707
Ah!
2282
02:20:24,975 --> 02:20:28,278
- How bad was it?
- Utterly dreadful. A joke! I jest!
2283
02:20:28,512 --> 02:20:31,615
- And Grossmith?
- A lamentable spectacle.
2284
02:20:31,849 --> 02:20:34,152
- Are you ready, Gilbert?
- Ready for what?
2285
02:20:34,385 --> 02:20:37,589
The gibbet?
2286
02:20:47,335 --> 02:20:50,337
And... full company!
2287
02:20:50,570 --> 02:20:54,443
Ladies and gentlemen, bow!
2288
02:20:55,010 --> 02:20:58,881
Thank you very much.
2289
02:21:15,801 --> 02:21:19,538
There's something inherently
disappointing about success.
2290
02:21:19,772 --> 02:21:22,075
Climax and anticlimax, Willie.
2291
02:21:22,308 --> 02:21:24,477
I don't quite know how to take praise.
2292
02:21:24,712 --> 02:21:26,547
It makes my eyes red.
2293
02:21:26,813 --> 02:21:29,749
It must be rather pleasant
to receive it, nonetheless.
2294
02:21:30,018 --> 02:21:32,854
I suppose so...
if one feels one deserves it.
2295
02:21:33,088 --> 02:21:37,525
I don't think anyone would deny
that you deserve it, Willie.
2296
02:21:37,760 --> 02:21:39,595
I know my limitations.
2297
02:21:39,829 --> 02:21:43,432
I should rather like to be an actor,
upon the stage.
2298
02:21:43,700 --> 02:21:45,602
- An actor?
- Yes.
2299
02:21:45,836 --> 02:21:49,073
Wouldn't it be wondrous
if perfectly commonplace people...
2300
02:21:49,307 --> 02:21:52,644
...gave each other a round of applause
at the end of the day?
2301
02:21:52,878 --> 02:21:54,813
Well done, Kitty! Well done!
2302
02:21:55,047 --> 02:21:58,117
Well done, Kitty! Bravo! Encore!
2303
02:21:58,351 --> 02:22:00,286
Thank you, Willie.
2304
02:22:00,520 --> 02:22:02,989
- Well, you must be tired.
- Must I?
2305
02:22:03,257 --> 02:22:05,259
I shall leave you to your beauty sleep.
2306
02:22:05,492 --> 02:22:08,963
No, don't go.
2307
02:22:09,097 --> 02:22:11,966
Any thoughts racing round
in that old brain of yours?
2308
02:22:12,200 --> 02:22:15,638
Thoughts of what nature?
2309
02:22:21,878 --> 02:22:23,680
Concerning your next piece.
2310
02:22:23,913 --> 02:22:25,850
Ah! That monster.
2311
02:22:26,084 --> 02:22:29,553
No, not as yet.
2312
02:22:30,756 --> 02:22:34,559
Perhaps you should do something
completely different and unusual.
2313
02:22:34,793 --> 02:22:37,497
- Such as what?
- Oh, well, I don't know!
2314
02:22:37,730 --> 02:22:39,498
Come along, suggest something!
2315
02:22:39,733 --> 02:22:43,203
Oh...
2316
02:22:47,074 --> 02:22:52,246
Well, you should have
a young and beautiful heroine...
2317
02:22:52,715 --> 02:22:56,553
...who grows old and plain.
2318
02:22:56,751 --> 02:22:59,321
As she gradually becomes
older and older...
2319
02:22:59,556 --> 02:23:02,660
...the ladies' chorus
becomes younger and younger.
2320
02:23:02,894 --> 02:23:04,962
Ah. Topsy-Turvy.
2321
02:23:05,196 --> 02:23:08,700
Yes.
2322
02:23:08,800 --> 02:23:12,437
How would it commence,
this comic opera of yours?
2323
02:23:12,671 --> 02:23:16,643
With the gentlemen's chorus, of course.
2324
02:23:16,776 --> 02:23:18,644
A chorus of fat leeches.
2325
02:23:18,879 --> 02:23:20,713
- Leeches?
- Yes!
2326
02:23:20,981 --> 02:23:22,782
No, they'd be gentlemen.
2327
02:23:23,017 --> 02:23:26,455
They'd be in their carriages
and they'd be rushing across the stage.
2328
02:23:26,688 --> 02:23:29,257
The horses would be
galloping across the stage...
2329
02:23:29,491 --> 02:23:32,394
...with the ladies chasing after them
to talk to them...
2330
02:23:32,662 --> 02:23:37,832
...but they wouldn't be listening,
they'd be far too busy.
2331
02:23:38,101 --> 02:23:39,303
Hmm.
2332
02:23:39,536 --> 02:23:41,438
Expensive to stage.
2333
02:23:41,706 --> 02:23:43,540
And there'd be dozens of doors...
2334
02:23:43,773 --> 02:23:45,842
...and ticking clocks on the stage.
2335
02:23:46,077 --> 02:23:48,414
He's made a vow to give her the key...
2336
02:23:48,647 --> 02:23:50,481
...but he never does.
2337
02:23:50,716 --> 02:23:54,220
Who might "he" be?
2338
02:23:54,754 --> 02:23:56,922
Well, he's her husband, I suppose.
2339
02:23:57,156 --> 02:23:59,492
The hero.
2340
02:23:59,726 --> 02:24:01,561
No, not the hero.
2341
02:24:01,796 --> 02:24:03,298
Anyway.
2342
02:24:03,531 --> 02:24:05,298
One day...
2343
02:24:05,533 --> 02:24:07,135
No.
2344
02:24:07,369 --> 02:24:09,170
Late one night...
2345
02:24:09,404 --> 02:24:11,606
...she suddenly decides to try the door...
2346
02:24:11,840 --> 02:24:13,674
...and it opens!
2347
02:24:13,943 --> 02:24:16,980
Ah. So it wasn't locked after all.
2348
02:24:17,214 --> 02:24:19,449
And she climbs up the stairs...
2349
02:24:19,683 --> 02:24:21,684
...and there, on the sands...
2350
02:24:21,918 --> 02:24:27,758
...are hundreds of nannies
all pushing empty perambulators about!
2351
02:24:38,705 --> 02:24:42,475
And every time she tries to be born...
2352
02:24:43,444 --> 02:24:47,482
...he strangles her with her umbilical cord.
2353
02:25:05,370 --> 02:25:09,642
I shouldn't imagine
Sullivan'd much care for "that".
2354
02:25:18,319 --> 02:25:20,220
I'm proud of myself...
2355
02:25:20,453 --> 02:25:24,559
...triumphant, exhilarated,
exhausted, revived...
2356
02:25:24,826 --> 02:25:29,731
...and fed up to the back teeth
with these wretched kidneys.
2357
02:25:29,965 --> 02:25:33,470
Poor old thing.
2358
02:25:35,238 --> 02:25:40,211
Arthur, an old demon has come back
to haunt us at a most unwelcome time.
2359
02:25:40,445 --> 02:25:43,948
What on earth do you mean?
2360
02:25:49,388 --> 02:25:52,158
Oh.
2361
02:25:52,425 --> 02:25:55,262
I didn't want to tell you.
2362
02:25:55,496 --> 02:25:58,966
- Are you sure?
- Yes.
2363
02:25:59,367 --> 02:26:01,869
How long have you known?
2364
02:26:02,103 --> 02:26:05,573
Ten days.
2365
02:26:06,374 --> 02:26:09,846
Oh, Fanny.
2366
02:26:11,381 --> 02:26:14,084
I shall make the arrangements.
2367
02:26:14,351 --> 02:26:16,186
That won't be necessary.
2368
02:26:16,420 --> 02:26:19,322
I couldn't go through that again.
2369
02:26:19,590 --> 02:26:22,927
I'm sorry that you have to.
2370
02:26:23,061 --> 02:26:25,897
I've made my own arrangements.
2371
02:26:26,131 --> 02:26:27,532
Have you?
2372
02:26:27,767 --> 02:26:30,703
Someone has been recommended to me.
2373
02:26:30,937 --> 02:26:33,373
After all...
2374
02:26:33,607 --> 02:26:37,110
...it is 1885, Arthur.
2375
02:26:37,745 --> 02:26:41,082
I love "The Mikado".
2376
02:26:41,216 --> 02:26:45,087
You've put everything you are into it.
2377
02:26:45,688 --> 02:26:48,859
You light up the world.
2378
02:26:49,092 --> 02:26:52,562
You can't help it.
2379
02:27:00,739 --> 02:27:04,208
I must fly.
2380
02:27:18,928 --> 02:27:23,866
Yes, I am indeed beautiful.
2381
02:27:24,333 --> 02:27:26,568
Sometimes I sit and wonder...
2382
02:27:26,802 --> 02:27:30,373
...in my artless Japanese way...
2383
02:27:30,607 --> 02:27:33,510
...why it is that I am
so much more attractive...
2384
02:27:33,744 --> 02:27:37,414
...than anybody else in the whole world.
2385
02:27:38,383 --> 02:27:41,286
Can this be vanity?
2386
02:27:41,552 --> 02:27:43,788
No.
2387
02:27:44,022 --> 02:27:45,857
Nature is lovely...
2388
02:27:46,091 --> 02:27:48,895
...and rejoices in her loveliness.
2389
02:27:49,128 --> 02:27:51,431
I am a child of nature...
2390
02:27:51,665 --> 02:27:55,268
...and take after my mother.
2391
02:28:07,851 --> 02:28:10,687
♪ The sun whose rays are all ablaze
2392
02:28:10,955 --> 02:28:15,126
♪ With ever-living glory
2393
02:28:15,393 --> 02:28:17,862
♪ Does not deny his majesty
2394
02:28:18,096 --> 02:28:22,133
♪ He scorns to tell a story
2395
02:28:22,368 --> 02:28:24,870
♪ He don't exclaim, "I blush for shame
2396
02:28:25,104 --> 02:28:29,342
♪ So kindly be indulgent"
2397
02:28:29,576 --> 02:28:32,446
♪ But fierce and bold in fiery gold
2398
02:28:32,713 --> 02:28:38,686
♪ He glories all effulgent
2399
02:28:39,854 --> 02:28:44,026
♪ I mean to rule the earth
2400
02:28:44,260 --> 02:28:46,863
♪ As he the sky
2401
02:28:47,097 --> 02:28:51,334
♪ We really know our worth
2402
02:28:51,568 --> 02:28:55,139
♪ The sun and I
2403
02:28:55,373 --> 02:28:59,377
♪ I mean to rule the earth as he the sky
2404
02:28:59,611 --> 02:29:02,581
♪ We really know our worth
2405
02:29:02,816 --> 02:29:09,156
♪ The sun and I
2406
02:29:13,093 --> 02:29:15,662
♪ Observe his flame, that placid dame
2407
02:29:15,897 --> 02:29:20,168
♪ The moon's Celestial Highness
2408
02:29:20,435 --> 02:29:22,771
♪ There's not a trace upon her face
2409
02:29:23,039 --> 02:29:27,143
♪ Of diffidence or shyness
2410
02:29:27,377 --> 02:29:30,014
♪ She borrows light that through the night
2411
02:29:30,280 --> 02:29:34,518
♪ Mankind may all acclaim her
2412
02:29:34,752 --> 02:29:35,786
♪ And truth to tell
2413
02:29:36,021 --> 02:29:37,088
♪ She lights up well
2414
02:29:37,355 --> 02:29:43,127
♪ So I for one don't blame her
2415
02:29:44,598 --> 02:29:48,668
♪ Ah, pray make no mistake
2416
02:29:48,903 --> 02:29:51,104
♪ We are not shy
2417
02:29:51,339 --> 02:29:55,510
♪ We're very wide awake
2418
02:29:55,744 --> 02:29:59,147
♪ The moon and I
2419
02:29:59,380 --> 02:30:04,386
♪ Ah, pray make no mistake
We are not shy
2420
02:30:04,620 --> 02:30:07,423
♪ We're very wide awake
2421
02:30:07,658 --> 02:30:14,900
♪ The moon and I
2422
02:30:17,858 --> 02:30:21,101
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