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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:44,700 --> 00:00:47,400 ACTORS 2 00:00:54,300 --> 00:00:55,400 You heard me... 3 00:00:56,300 --> 00:00:59,100 You heard me asking for a jar of hot water... 4 00:00:59,800 --> 00:01:00,400 Yes. 5 00:01:01,100 --> 00:01:02,200 Did I ask for it? 6 00:01:02,700 --> 00:01:03,500 Yes. 7 00:01:03,700 --> 00:01:05,400 Then why doesn't he bring it? 8 00:01:05,900 --> 00:01:08,300 Perhaps you were not quite convincing. 9 00:01:08,500 --> 00:01:09,800 Did I do it wrong? 10 00:01:10,000 --> 00:01:12,200 It seemed you wanted a jar of lukewarm water. 11 00:01:12,700 --> 00:01:16,500 Don't think about the jar, it could be any jar. 12 00:01:17,200 --> 00:01:19,600 You say nothing. You never say anything! 13 00:01:19,900 --> 00:01:21,200 What do you want me to say? 14 00:01:21,400 --> 00:01:23,000 Did you hear me asking for the water? 15 00:01:23,300 --> 00:01:24,500 - To whom? - The waiter. 16 00:01:24,700 --> 00:01:27,000 That hasn't left an unerasable memory. 17 00:01:29,100 --> 00:01:30,200 That's annoying. 18 00:01:30,800 --> 00:01:32,200 Were you listening to me? 19 00:01:32,400 --> 00:01:35,400 It's up to you to make yourself listened... 20 00:01:35,700 --> 00:01:37,900 if you want to be listened. 21 00:01:38,100 --> 00:01:39,100 Are you sure you asked for it? 22 00:01:39,300 --> 00:01:40,000 What? 23 00:01:40,300 --> 00:01:41,500 The jar of hot water. 24 00:01:41,700 --> 00:01:45,100 He asked for it. Ten minutes ago. 25 00:01:46,000 --> 00:01:49,200 It's the "how". That's the problem. 26 00:01:49,700 --> 00:01:50,600 Weren't you a bit soft? 27 00:01:50,800 --> 00:01:54,000 No. I was firm. Polite but firm. 28 00:01:54,600 --> 00:01:58,400 You don't look firm to me. More kind of helpless. 29 00:01:58,700 --> 00:02:00,500 Aren't you a bit helpless? 30 00:02:01,700 --> 00:02:04,800 Can you show us how you requested the hot water? 31 00:02:05,100 --> 00:02:06,800 - You want me to repeat it? - Yes. 32 00:02:07,100 --> 00:02:09,100 - Can you do the same twice? - Of course! 33 00:02:09,500 --> 00:02:10,800 We are listening. 34 00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:16,200 Waiter, please, can I have a small jar of hot water? 35 00:02:17,500 --> 00:02:19,800 Their coffee is good, but... 36 00:02:23,100 --> 00:02:24,000 Soft. 37 00:02:24,200 --> 00:02:24,900 What d'you mean �soft�? 38 00:02:25,200 --> 00:02:26,000 Soft. 39 00:02:27,500 --> 00:02:30,300 Besides, the guy, he did not hear you. 40 00:02:30,700 --> 00:02:32,700 It's the second time he hasn't heard you. 41 00:02:32,900 --> 00:02:35,000 He wasn't far away. He should have heard you. 42 00:02:35,500 --> 00:02:38,600 Then you show me how you ask for the hot water. 43 00:02:38,900 --> 00:02:40,300 I don't ask for hot water. 44 00:02:40,500 --> 00:02:42,300 Isn't your coffee too strong? 45 00:02:42,500 --> 00:02:44,400 - No, as I'm drinking it. - Doesn't it make you skittish? 46 00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:45,800 Of course. 47 00:02:46,000 --> 00:02:49,200 See I was right? Just look at you. 48 00:02:49,400 --> 00:02:50,800 I'll be fine. 49 00:02:51,100 --> 00:02:52,800 With some water you could water it down. 50 00:02:53,000 --> 00:02:54,200 I didn't ask for water. 51 00:02:54,500 --> 00:02:55,800 But I did, and it doesn't come. 52 00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:57,600 That's what makes us different. 53 00:03:00,400 --> 00:03:02,200 Do I speak clearly? 54 00:03:03,700 --> 00:03:07,200 No joke, I'm asking seriously. 55 00:03:08,100 --> 00:03:09,800 Do I speak clearly? 56 00:03:11,100 --> 00:03:13,000 I share your anguish. 57 00:03:13,600 --> 00:03:16,000 What is an actor who is no longer listened? 58 00:03:18,300 --> 00:03:21,000 He is a lost man, my old friend. 59 00:03:21,900 --> 00:03:24,000 - But I am listening to you. - Are you? 60 00:03:24,300 --> 00:03:25,100 I promise. 61 00:03:26,200 --> 00:03:27,700 What did I say to you? 62 00:03:28,000 --> 00:03:29,500 You were speaking about the hot water... 63 00:03:29,700 --> 00:03:30,600 What about it? 64 00:03:30,800 --> 00:03:32,600 I don't know, it was... 65 00:03:33,300 --> 00:03:34,800 Sorry to interrupt you... 66 00:03:35,100 --> 00:03:36,100 What? What's the matter? 67 00:03:36,300 --> 00:03:38,500 One hour and a half with that! 68 00:03:38,700 --> 00:03:39,700 We're just talking. 69 00:03:39,900 --> 00:03:40,700 Yes, but I don't give a damn. 70 00:03:41,700 --> 00:03:43,600 What a filthy job! 71 00:03:44,300 --> 00:03:46,600 At least we work. 72 00:03:46,800 --> 00:03:48,600 - Yeah, with whom? - That... 73 00:03:50,500 --> 00:03:52,100 Who's paying for the bill? 74 00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:56,000 It's just a missed lunch, it's not that serious. 75 00:03:56,400 --> 00:03:58,300 There are much worse things. 76 00:03:59,100 --> 00:04:02,800 That's the typical reasoning that really makes me mad. 77 00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:06,700 You break a leg, and the guy tells you: "It's only a broken leg, 78 00:04:06,900 --> 00:04:10,000 a cancer would be much worse.� Unbeatable! 79 00:04:10,500 --> 00:04:11,700 Nothing already matters. 80 00:04:11,900 --> 00:04:14,300 Your wife goes away, "that's nothing, 81 00:04:14,600 --> 00:04:16,500 thank God that you're not blind.� 82 00:04:16,700 --> 00:04:20,000 Your son is on drugs, "a war would be much worse." 83 00:04:20,200 --> 00:04:22,700 The war breaks out, "not serious, 84 00:04:22,900 --> 00:04:25,400 not nuclear, just the old kind with mortars." 85 00:04:25,600 --> 00:04:28,600 It's nothing! They smash you to bits, but it's nothing! 86 00:04:29,800 --> 00:04:31,300 All right, I have been drinking. 87 00:04:31,500 --> 00:04:35,300 I am an actor who drinks. A good actor drinks! 88 00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:37,000 Aren't you going to stone me? 89 00:04:37,200 --> 00:04:38,800 I wouldn't dare. 90 00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:40,500 All great actors drink! 91 00:04:41,200 --> 00:04:42,900 G�rard Philippe did not drink. 92 00:04:43,200 --> 00:04:44,900 Neither did Laurence Olivier. 93 00:04:45,400 --> 00:04:46,500 Carmet drank. 94 00:04:46,800 --> 00:04:48,400 I agree. Carmet drank. 95 00:04:48,600 --> 00:04:51,900 - Depardieu drinks. - Depardieu, I agree. 96 00:04:52,200 --> 00:04:53,600 Piccoli drinks. 97 00:04:54,200 --> 00:04:55,200 Piccoli? 98 00:04:55,600 --> 00:04:56,700 Piccoli drinks. 99 00:04:57,900 --> 00:05:01,700 Piccoli has never drunk. I have never seen him drunk. 100 00:05:02,200 --> 00:05:06,100 And me? You see me drunk? So? Waiter, pour me another one. 101 00:05:06,800 --> 00:05:08,600 Yes, Mr. Villeret, right now. 102 00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:11,600 He can hear when he is told something interesting. 103 00:05:23,000 --> 00:05:25,700 Thank you, my friend. Leave the bottle. 104 00:05:26,900 --> 00:05:28,700 Have you met Mr. Marielle? 105 00:05:29,200 --> 00:05:31,500 Delighted. I loved your last film. 106 00:05:31,700 --> 00:05:33,200 - You did? - Very good. 107 00:05:38,600 --> 00:05:40,200 Do you remember the title? 108 00:05:41,100 --> 00:05:44,700 Yes, er... Something with... "bush"? 109 00:05:45,100 --> 00:05:46,400 "Bushes"? 110 00:05:46,900 --> 00:05:47,700 "Behind the bushes"? 111 00:05:48,000 --> 00:05:50,800 No. There were no bushes. No bushes. 112 00:05:51,000 --> 00:05:52,600 What was there then? 113 00:05:52,800 --> 00:05:54,300 A jar of hot water. 114 00:05:54,700 --> 00:05:56,700 A jar of hot water, what for? 115 00:05:57,200 --> 00:05:58,900 - I am Jean-Pierre Marielle. - Yes. 116 00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:01,300 - The actor. - Yes, I see. 117 00:06:01,800 --> 00:06:03,100 - That's it. - Good. 118 00:06:04,300 --> 00:06:05,200 That's all. 119 00:06:06,900 --> 00:06:07,800 Sure. 120 00:06:14,400 --> 00:06:17,200 Do you want me to replace you for a while? 121 00:06:18,000 --> 00:06:21,600 With pleasure. I leave them to you. Going to take some fresh air. 122 00:06:25,900 --> 00:06:27,000 You'll see. 123 00:06:27,600 --> 00:06:30,900 That's a smiling good humored guy. 124 00:06:32,400 --> 00:06:34,100 Are you drinking Marielle's coffee? 125 00:06:34,300 --> 00:06:36,100 Of course, why not? 126 00:06:36,600 --> 00:06:37,600 It's cold. 127 00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:40,600 I like cold coffee. 128 00:06:43,600 --> 00:06:44,900 Then drink it. 129 00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:47,300 Of course I'll drink it. Of course. 130 00:06:50,700 --> 00:06:52,200 No sugar? 131 00:06:52,500 --> 00:06:54,200 Marielle never uses it. 132 00:06:54,400 --> 00:06:57,100 He's right. Much better. Thus you feel the bitterness. 133 00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:04,700 Well, guys, how is everything? 134 00:07:05,100 --> 00:07:06,300 Well, well. 135 00:07:08,700 --> 00:07:10,800 Always smiling, aren't you? 136 00:07:11,700 --> 00:07:13,000 Who? Me? 137 00:07:14,200 --> 00:07:17,600 Yes, you. Claude Rich. You're Claude Rich, right? 138 00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:19,600 Er... yes. 139 00:07:20,900 --> 00:07:21,800 Yes. 140 00:07:22,600 --> 00:07:23,800 The smiling actor... 141 00:07:24,000 --> 00:07:24,800 Yes. 142 00:07:25,400 --> 00:07:26,800 Always smiling? 143 00:07:27,200 --> 00:07:29,300 Er... I mean... Yes. 144 00:07:30,300 --> 00:07:32,700 I try to. As far as possible. 145 00:07:33,500 --> 00:07:37,400 Is it a natural smile or only a facade? 146 00:07:39,300 --> 00:07:40,600 I have always smiled. 147 00:07:42,400 --> 00:07:43,700 You have also smiled. 148 00:07:44,100 --> 00:07:46,300 I remember you smiling. 149 00:07:46,500 --> 00:07:49,200 I don't smile any more. 150 00:07:52,700 --> 00:07:54,600 Besides, neither do you. 151 00:07:55,600 --> 00:07:58,900 Now, right now, why don't you smile any more? 152 00:07:59,800 --> 00:08:03,600 I smile. Look. Look as I smile. 153 00:08:04,500 --> 00:08:06,600 I even laugh. 154 00:08:13,900 --> 00:08:17,100 A guy who smiles all the time has something to hide. 155 00:08:18,500 --> 00:08:19,900 What are you hiding? 156 00:08:21,300 --> 00:08:23,400 Answer when you're asked a question. 157 00:08:25,800 --> 00:08:27,000 Well, it's because... 158 00:08:28,700 --> 00:08:30,500 I've been so happy... 159 00:08:30,700 --> 00:08:34,300 I've always wondered why, why me. 160 00:08:34,500 --> 00:08:36,500 So much luck, how's that possible? 161 00:08:36,700 --> 00:08:39,700 Even when I fell down, I thought "lucky guy" 162 00:08:41,400 --> 00:08:43,700 You see these small eye wrinkles? 163 00:08:44,000 --> 00:08:45,600 That's called a "wrinkled". 164 00:08:47,000 --> 00:08:49,300 It means that the curtain is open. 165 00:08:50,500 --> 00:08:52,900 I give a charming performance. 166 00:08:53,600 --> 00:08:54,600 People love me. 167 00:08:54,900 --> 00:08:56,400 They think I'm brilliant. 168 00:08:56,700 --> 00:08:58,200 I feel light. 169 00:08:59,500 --> 00:09:01,500 I wear another man's costume. 170 00:09:01,900 --> 00:09:04,500 A powdered lady even helped me to put it on. 171 00:09:05,500 --> 00:09:07,100 Like when I was little... 172 00:09:08,600 --> 00:09:10,300 and my mother dressed me. 173 00:09:14,200 --> 00:09:15,300 Do you understand now? 174 00:09:17,100 --> 00:09:18,800 Is there anything to be undrestood? 175 00:09:20,000 --> 00:09:22,300 I'm explaining why I smile. 176 00:09:23,400 --> 00:09:24,200 Yes. 177 00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:26,900 I'm gentle enough to smile. 178 00:09:27,900 --> 00:09:28,900 Yes. 179 00:09:30,100 --> 00:09:33,400 You don't feel the same? The need to thank? 180 00:09:35,800 --> 00:09:36,800 No. 181 00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:39,200 No? Then what do you feel? 182 00:09:41,300 --> 00:09:44,000 Nothing. Only a feeling of emptiness. 183 00:09:45,300 --> 00:09:46,800 I'm like a container. 184 00:09:50,700 --> 00:09:52,500 A hot water jar? 185 00:09:53,600 --> 00:09:55,000 You know about that? 186 00:09:55,700 --> 00:09:58,600 Everybody knows about it. That's why I've come. 187 00:09:58,900 --> 00:10:00,700 - It seems the blow was hard. - Very hard. 188 00:10:02,200 --> 00:10:05,100 But what did he want to do with it? Drink it? 189 00:10:05,800 --> 00:10:07,700 We don't know. We didn't understand. 190 00:10:11,200 --> 00:10:13,100 What the heck should I do with this water jar? 191 00:10:13,400 --> 00:10:15,700 I'm only asking you to order it. 192 00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:18,700 You, move from there. Leave your place for this gentleman. 193 00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:23,600 And where shall I put myself now? 194 00:10:24,800 --> 00:10:27,000 You can take my place. 195 00:10:27,400 --> 00:10:29,300 My life is ruined. 196 00:10:29,600 --> 00:10:32,500 Thank you, you're very kind. If I can help you... 197 00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:35,900 Do you have a gun? 198 00:10:36,900 --> 00:10:37,900 On me? 199 00:10:39,300 --> 00:10:42,100 Forget it. He understands nothing. 200 00:10:43,600 --> 00:10:44,700 But wait! 201 00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:46,700 I don't know if I have a gun. 202 00:10:48,200 --> 00:10:50,000 Who's this idiot? 203 00:10:56,200 --> 00:10:57,700 What am I supposed to do? 204 00:10:59,100 --> 00:11:01,500 He doesn't know what he has to do. 205 00:11:03,000 --> 00:11:04,600 How should I know it? 206 00:11:04,700 --> 00:11:08,100 Think of your text. Always and above all, your text. 207 00:11:08,300 --> 00:11:10,900 Yes, but what text? No one gave me a text! 208 00:11:11,100 --> 00:11:13,400 Then clear off and stop annoying us. 209 00:11:13,600 --> 00:11:15,700 Come, you're at the wrong table. 210 00:11:16,200 --> 00:11:19,700 When I'm given a place I never give it up to anybody. 211 00:11:19,900 --> 00:11:21,700 - I'm not asking that. - What do you want? 212 00:11:21,900 --> 00:11:22,700 Nothing, nothing! 213 00:11:22,900 --> 00:11:25,100 Then shut up and stop this show. 214 00:11:25,300 --> 00:11:28,600 For some people here lunch is a time to rest. 215 00:11:29,200 --> 00:11:30,700 I won't ask for your jar of hot water! 216 00:11:30,900 --> 00:11:32,200 You want to be a bore! 217 00:11:32,400 --> 00:11:34,500 I won't ask for it. You do it yourself. 218 00:11:34,700 --> 00:11:36,300 Me? The guy doesn't hear me. 219 00:11:36,500 --> 00:11:37,600 I don't want to be filmed. 220 00:11:37,800 --> 00:11:39,000 No one is filming you. 221 00:11:39,200 --> 00:11:41,500 Don't believe you! There's always a hidden camera. 222 00:11:41,700 --> 00:11:44,400 Forget the camera, otherwise you'll be bad. 223 00:11:44,600 --> 00:11:46,900 Right now you're good. Forget the camera. 224 00:11:47,200 --> 00:11:48,600 A jar of hot water. 225 00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:51,600 Don't ask me. Ask the waiter. 226 00:11:51,800 --> 00:11:52,700 There are four waiters. 227 00:11:52,900 --> 00:11:55,900 The one who's going away, the thin one. Hurry up! 228 00:11:56,200 --> 00:11:57,700 Waiter! Please! 229 00:11:58,800 --> 00:12:00,900 Could I have a jar of hot water, please? 230 00:12:01,400 --> 00:12:03,800 Right away! A jar of hot water! One! 231 00:12:04,200 --> 00:12:06,500 Can I go to my date now? 232 00:12:13,300 --> 00:12:15,700 What do you do for a living? 233 00:12:16,900 --> 00:12:17,900 Actor. 234 00:12:18,400 --> 00:12:20,400 Are you acceptable? 235 00:12:22,100 --> 00:12:24,400 - Are you famous? 236 00:12:25,700 --> 00:12:27,300 I know Mr Villeret well. 237 00:12:27,500 --> 00:12:28,600 But I don't know you. 238 00:12:30,900 --> 00:12:33,300 I'm Decharme. Christian Decharme. 239 00:12:33,900 --> 00:12:36,300 - Businessman. - We don't care. 240 00:12:36,500 --> 00:12:38,400 - I had a partner... - We don't care. 241 00:12:38,600 --> 00:12:41,300 - A 30 year's friendship... - We don't care. 242 00:12:41,500 --> 00:12:43,300 This guy, how shall I put it... 243 00:12:43,600 --> 00:12:45,100 But we don't care. 244 00:12:45,300 --> 00:12:47,500 - He was more than a brother. - We don't care. 245 00:12:47,900 --> 00:12:50,900 Not a bit tired of saying "we don't care"? 246 00:12:51,100 --> 00:12:52,500 Yes. Beginning to. 247 00:12:53,500 --> 00:12:54,900 Where does it hurt? 248 00:12:55,200 --> 00:12:56,400 The trapeziuses! 249 00:12:57,080 --> 00:12:59,196 Take off your jacket, I'll give you a massage. 250 00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:53,031 You're not wanted here again, is that clear? 251 00:13:53,360 --> 00:13:57,114 You are "regurgitated". The restaurant "regurgitates" you. 252 00:13:58,720 --> 00:14:00,119 Poor idiot. 253 00:14:00,680 --> 00:14:04,070 I'm not a poor idiot. You're wrong. 254 00:14:04,320 --> 00:14:07,630 there aren't enough roles for all, that's the truth. 255 00:14:07,920 --> 00:14:11,674 We talked about it at the meeting, remember? 256 00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:15,788 At present the role is mine, tomorrow you'll have it. 257 00:14:16,280 --> 00:14:18,669 But for the moment, it's mine. 258 00:14:18,960 --> 00:14:21,679 So you go away and leave the place to me. 259 00:14:22,880 --> 00:14:25,155 Anyway, I will be better. 260 00:14:25,480 --> 00:14:27,277 You know that. 261 00:14:27,480 --> 00:14:28,595 It's not a role for you. 262 00:14:28,800 --> 00:14:31,439 The suit would be too large for you. 263 00:14:31,920 --> 00:14:33,990 Too much cloth. You would float. 264 00:14:35,560 --> 00:14:36,470 Good. 265 00:14:39,240 --> 00:14:41,196 Will you call me in at the countryside? 266 00:14:45,160 --> 00:14:47,355 may I know this idiot's name? 267 00:14:50,920 --> 00:14:53,115 We get along well, hey? 268 00:14:54,280 --> 00:14:56,316 Being together is a good idea. 269 00:14:56,520 --> 00:14:58,238 Yes. Excellent. 270 00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:01,271 The first time we've filmed together? 271 00:15:01,480 --> 00:15:03,072 Yes, the first. 272 00:15:04,360 --> 00:15:05,918 We are good, right? 273 00:15:06,720 --> 00:15:08,995 Not the worst for sure. 274 00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:12,199 Where are we going like this? 275 00:15:12,880 --> 00:15:14,518 I know nothing. 276 00:15:15,480 --> 00:15:16,959 Isn't he going to say "cut"? 277 00:15:17,920 --> 00:15:20,514 - Forget it, act natural. - I am natural. 278 00:15:20,840 --> 00:15:22,353 You could be more. 279 00:15:22,840 --> 00:15:25,434 Don't stay in the middle, we're filming a shot. 280 00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:27,313 A shot? What shot? 281 00:15:27,520 --> 00:15:29,875 A shot where there's some idiot passing who does not recognize us. 282 00:15:30,080 --> 00:15:31,957 But I recognize you! I want an autograph! 283 00:15:32,160 --> 00:15:34,276 - We don't give them. - You're not nice. 284 00:15:34,480 --> 00:15:36,630 I am nice. Got a paper? 285 00:15:36,840 --> 00:15:38,193 I even have a pen. 286 00:15:38,400 --> 00:15:40,038 Hurry up, losing precious time. 287 00:15:41,200 --> 00:15:43,270 My name is Andr� Dussolier. 288 00:15:43,920 --> 00:15:45,717 That's it! Signed! 289 00:15:45,920 --> 00:15:47,751 Clear off! I keep the pen. 290 00:15:48,960 --> 00:15:49,710 Where's the other idiot? 291 00:15:50,400 --> 00:15:52,038 Talking about me? 292 00:15:52,400 --> 00:15:53,753 No, not you. 293 00:15:53,960 --> 00:15:57,032 You said "the other idiot". Not very nice... 294 00:15:58,080 --> 00:15:59,718 I was talking about Sami Frey. 295 00:16:00,360 --> 00:16:01,679 Have you seen him? 296 00:16:01,880 --> 00:16:05,077 I haven't seen any Sami. But I've been around. 297 00:16:12,080 --> 00:16:13,354 Are you following me? 298 00:16:13,560 --> 00:16:15,437 Yes, I'm following you. 299 00:16:15,920 --> 00:16:16,830 Why? 300 00:16:17,120 --> 00:16:19,076 I have the right to follow whoever I want. 301 00:16:19,520 --> 00:16:21,431 If I want, I'll overtake you... 302 00:16:22,200 --> 00:16:24,953 Look, I'm overtaking you. 303 00:16:26,200 --> 00:16:28,077 It's you who's following me now. 304 00:16:29,200 --> 00:16:30,952 If I stop, you stop too. 305 00:16:31,480 --> 00:16:33,072 And if I turn around? 306 00:16:33,280 --> 00:16:35,396 - I also turn. - I go the other way. 307 00:16:35,600 --> 00:16:36,828 I keep following you. 308 00:16:38,800 --> 00:16:40,631 - What if I stop? - Where? 309 00:16:41,280 --> 00:16:43,111 Middle of the crossroads. And now? 310 00:16:43,320 --> 00:16:45,390 - I'm pissed off. - Finally! 311 00:16:45,600 --> 00:16:47,795 - The cars are shaving my buttocks. - At last! 312 00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:49,433 Move your ass, fag! 313 00:16:49,640 --> 00:16:50,516 I'm not a fag! 314 00:16:53,120 --> 00:16:54,872 What about fags? 315 00:16:55,080 --> 00:16:56,274 What do you mean? Nothing. 316 00:16:56,600 --> 00:16:58,670 - You don't like fags? - Yes, very much. 317 00:16:58,880 --> 00:17:00,233 I'm a fag! 318 00:17:00,600 --> 00:17:01,635 Since when? 319 00:17:01,840 --> 00:17:02,909 It's caught me recently. 320 00:17:03,120 --> 00:17:04,553 How? 321 00:17:04,760 --> 00:17:05,317 From behind. 322 00:17:05,600 --> 00:17:07,238 Yes, inevitably. 323 00:17:07,720 --> 00:17:08,630 Inevitably. 324 00:17:08,840 --> 00:17:10,034 I don't like that word very much. 325 00:17:10,240 --> 00:17:11,275 Me neither. 326 00:17:11,480 --> 00:17:12,549 I prefer "tenderly". 327 00:17:12,760 --> 00:17:14,671 I wasn't going to say "tenderly" 328 00:17:15,040 --> 00:17:16,951 - You could have. - I say what I want. 329 00:17:17,160 --> 00:17:19,799 - Me, I do what I want. - I don't give a damn. 330 00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:22,995 I can give you one. 331 00:17:23,320 --> 00:17:25,117 I forbid you to touch me. 332 00:17:25,840 --> 00:17:28,434 I'll touch you if I want to. 333 00:17:29,840 --> 00:17:31,478 You don't say! 334 00:17:31,680 --> 00:17:35,434 In showbusiness there are very important people who are homosexuals. 335 00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:36,829 Yes, I know some. 336 00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:39,679 I'm not talking about the known ones, those who admit it. 337 00:17:39,960 --> 00:17:42,554 What matters is those we don't know. 338 00:17:42,960 --> 00:17:44,075 Piccoli, for example. 339 00:17:44,280 --> 00:17:47,078 Piccoli? Come on, don't believe you. 340 00:17:47,680 --> 00:17:49,477 He's a fag, I'm telling you. 341 00:17:50,120 --> 00:17:50,870 He's a fag! 342 00:17:51,440 --> 00:17:52,953 It's not recent. 343 00:18:01,680 --> 00:18:04,877 You could have slapped him in the face, he deserved it. 344 00:18:07,040 --> 00:18:08,359 I was very firm. 345 00:18:08,560 --> 00:18:10,152 He always thinks he's firm. 346 00:18:10,360 --> 00:18:11,793 I've met some more firm. 347 00:18:12,280 --> 00:18:13,030 In Italy. 348 00:18:16,160 --> 00:18:18,390 Sorry, Pierrot. I'm a bit nervous. 349 00:18:20,680 --> 00:18:24,468 Tell me if there are things you don't like about me. 350 00:18:27,240 --> 00:18:30,312 Your skin still has the smell of women. 351 00:18:33,040 --> 00:18:35,031 The jar of hot water, 352 00:18:35,240 --> 00:18:36,798 when I asked you for it, 353 00:18:37,720 --> 00:18:40,917 did you hear me, or was it to piss me off? 354 00:18:43,040 --> 00:18:45,998 I heard someone... 355 00:18:46,600 --> 00:18:48,113 asking for something... 356 00:18:49,360 --> 00:18:51,157 but it was so blurred... 357 00:18:51,360 --> 00:18:52,270 so distant... 358 00:18:54,480 --> 00:18:56,710 It seemed somebody asking for help, 359 00:18:57,560 --> 00:18:58,993 but without hope. 360 00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:01,675 A drowning person? 361 00:19:03,760 --> 00:19:04,636 Yes. 362 00:19:06,120 --> 00:19:07,917 Not totally drowned yet, 363 00:19:08,640 --> 00:19:10,995 but getting used to the idea of dying. 364 00:19:11,720 --> 00:19:13,597 "I'm drowning", he says to himself. 365 00:19:13,800 --> 00:19:14,755 "Bah..." 366 00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:16,469 "At last..." 367 00:19:18,640 --> 00:19:20,358 Does someone pay you? 368 00:19:21,080 --> 00:19:22,911 - What for? - To get me down. 369 00:19:23,120 --> 00:19:24,633 I was already down. 370 00:19:25,240 --> 00:19:27,435 Who's plotting against me? 371 00:19:27,640 --> 00:19:31,519 It's not against you, it's against all actors. 372 00:19:31,720 --> 00:19:33,392 But why actors? 373 00:19:34,400 --> 00:19:36,277 What have they done wrong? 374 00:19:36,960 --> 00:19:37,790 Sir, 375 00:19:39,160 --> 00:19:40,070 Sir, 376 00:19:41,840 --> 00:19:43,910 I've something to ask from you. 377 00:19:44,920 --> 00:19:46,592 Can you give me an autograph? 378 00:19:46,920 --> 00:19:48,148 An autograph? 379 00:19:49,000 --> 00:19:49,830 From me? 380 00:19:50,600 --> 00:19:52,158 What for? 381 00:19:53,160 --> 00:19:54,513 I'm Pierre Arditi. 382 00:19:55,520 --> 00:19:57,511 yes, I've recognized you. 383 00:19:58,680 --> 00:20:00,272 One day I was at Quimper, 384 00:20:00,560 --> 00:20:02,391 with a woman I dreamt of marrying. 385 00:20:02,640 --> 00:20:05,029 I was proposing, confessing my love 386 00:20:05,240 --> 00:20:07,231 and you came for an autograph. 387 00:20:07,480 --> 00:20:08,754 Yes, I remember it very well. 388 00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:10,194 You didn't have a pen. 389 00:20:10,440 --> 00:20:12,271 - Yes, that's true. - Nor paper. 390 00:20:12,520 --> 00:20:13,077 Right. 391 00:20:13,720 --> 00:20:15,517 And me, to please that woman, 392 00:20:15,720 --> 00:20:19,554 to show her that an actor can be a simple commited person, 393 00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:23,355 I went for some paper and she ran off, never to be seen again... 394 00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:25,596 And now I live with Jean Claude Brialy! 395 00:20:25,840 --> 00:20:26,989 Very good, Brialy! 396 00:20:27,200 --> 00:20:28,838 Not bad, but I prefer a woman. 397 00:20:29,040 --> 00:20:30,598 Then you may have mine. 398 00:20:30,800 --> 00:20:32,119 - Do you have one? - Of course. 399 00:20:32,320 --> 00:20:33,514 - How's she? - Very well. 400 00:20:33,720 --> 00:20:36,314 She's the one you were crazy about. 401 00:20:37,800 --> 00:20:39,597 Did she leave with you? 402 00:20:39,800 --> 00:20:42,394 Yes, a crazy story. Do I sign the autograph? 403 00:20:42,600 --> 00:20:43,999 - Yes... - A pen? 404 00:20:44,200 --> 00:20:44,996 Yes... yes. 405 00:20:45,360 --> 00:20:47,920 Here's my card. Fran�ois N�gre. 406 00:20:49,560 --> 00:20:50,913 We might have lunch some day. 407 00:20:51,120 --> 00:20:54,430 Interesting projects? Cinema? Theatre? 408 00:20:54,680 --> 00:20:55,795 You do mainly theatre? 409 00:20:56,480 --> 00:20:57,879 You, you're above all an idiot! 410 00:20:58,320 --> 00:21:01,676 I try to alternate: idiot, intelligent... 411 00:21:01,880 --> 00:21:04,155 Like me: theatre, cinema... 412 00:21:04,800 --> 00:21:05,949 Harmony in some way. 413 00:21:06,320 --> 00:21:07,833 That's it, harmony. 414 00:21:08,280 --> 00:21:10,077 That's very French, harmony. 415 00:21:11,080 --> 00:21:12,638 Of course, harmony is... 416 00:21:13,080 --> 00:21:14,559 Okay, ciao! 417 00:21:18,080 --> 00:21:18,751 Ciao! 418 00:21:33,360 --> 00:21:35,032 Are you Pierre Arditi? 419 00:21:35,240 --> 00:21:36,116 What do you care? 420 00:21:36,320 --> 00:21:39,039 - I admire you a lot. - Thank you. 421 00:21:39,320 --> 00:21:42,357 I run to see the plays you're in. 422 00:21:42,920 --> 00:21:44,239 Won't she shut up? 423 00:21:44,440 --> 00:21:46,908 To the cinema too. I see all your films. 424 00:21:47,120 --> 00:21:49,680 If I had to choose, I'd prefer the theatre. 425 00:21:49,920 --> 00:21:51,831 You're a stage man! 426 00:21:52,040 --> 00:21:53,359 You glue me, Madame! 427 00:21:53,560 --> 00:21:55,790 "I glue you"? Did I hear right? 428 00:21:56,000 --> 00:21:57,228 Yes, you glue me. 429 00:21:57,440 --> 00:21:59,237 What do you mean by that? 430 00:21:59,440 --> 00:22:00,714 You glue... 431 00:22:01,360 --> 00:22:02,588 to my balls! 432 00:22:02,920 --> 00:22:04,717 I feel sucked! 433 00:22:06,040 --> 00:22:07,393 Oh, you're so funny! 434 00:22:07,600 --> 00:22:10,114 - She thinks I'm funny! - And so Parisian! 435 00:22:10,320 --> 00:22:11,878 I'm going to kill her! 436 00:22:12,080 --> 00:22:13,195 No, don't do it! 437 00:22:13,400 --> 00:22:17,154 Yes, yes, I need it! I need it! 438 00:22:45,080 --> 00:22:47,992 Do not be afraid, Ladies and Gentlemen! They're actors playing! 439 00:22:50,600 --> 00:22:52,238 Greet them! 440 00:22:52,440 --> 00:22:53,998 I'll screw them! I'll screw them! 441 00:22:54,200 --> 00:22:57,875 Ok, but at the same time greet them. Nice, be nice... 442 00:22:58,320 --> 00:22:59,833 - Going to kill the fat woman. - This way. 443 00:23:01,000 --> 00:23:02,638 You're a pain! 444 00:23:02,840 --> 00:23:05,638 I have known big pains, but you beat them all. 445 00:23:06,040 --> 00:23:09,316 If there had been a paparazzo, what'd have happened to your career? 446 00:23:10,720 --> 00:23:11,914 Give me a present. 447 00:23:12,120 --> 00:23:15,032 Now you want a present! And why a present? 448 00:23:15,760 --> 00:23:18,149 - To console me. - Ok, a small one, then. 449 00:23:19,320 --> 00:23:21,390 Don't like them small, I prefer nothing. 450 00:23:21,600 --> 00:23:25,115 What a cross! You're pretty pampered already. 451 00:23:25,880 --> 00:23:27,677 Pampered? By what? By whom? 452 00:23:27,960 --> 00:23:28,949 By life! 453 00:23:30,480 --> 00:23:32,118 Old fag! 454 00:23:42,800 --> 00:23:44,552 I'm sorry, Jean-Claude. 455 00:23:49,240 --> 00:23:51,356 I am going to ask you a thing: 456 00:23:51,560 --> 00:23:53,710 you're going to be kind and respect me. 457 00:23:54,200 --> 00:23:55,553 I'm older than you... 458 00:23:56,160 --> 00:23:58,879 Not much, even so 15 years older. 459 00:23:59,440 --> 00:24:02,079 I knew Marl�ne Dietrich, 460 00:24:02,920 --> 00:24:05,150 and almost knew Sacha Guitry. 461 00:24:05,360 --> 00:24:06,873 I was famous before you. 462 00:24:07,440 --> 00:24:09,396 The Nouvelle Vague, have you heard about it? 463 00:24:09,960 --> 00:24:11,154 You rise, 464 00:24:11,360 --> 00:24:13,669 I step down. It's normal. 465 00:24:14,840 --> 00:24:17,229 They choke me, after 50 years. 466 00:24:17,840 --> 00:24:19,592 They're fed up. 467 00:24:19,800 --> 00:24:21,358 But I'm still here. 468 00:24:21,720 --> 00:24:24,075 And I still play husbands, 469 00:24:24,640 --> 00:24:26,995 bankers, furious lawyers. 470 00:24:28,200 --> 00:24:30,839 I am not proud, but I'm not ashamed either. 471 00:24:31,800 --> 00:24:33,392 I accept any role. 472 00:24:34,880 --> 00:24:36,632 But I would never accept 473 00:24:38,280 --> 00:24:39,679 to play a fag. 474 00:24:40,680 --> 00:24:41,954 Even so, you fuck up my ass! 475 00:24:45,520 --> 00:24:46,919 Who said "cut"? 476 00:24:47,120 --> 00:24:48,678 Did anyone say "cut"? 477 00:24:48,960 --> 00:24:49,949 Did you hear "cut"? 478 00:24:50,160 --> 00:24:51,673 I did not hear any "cut". 479 00:24:56,280 --> 00:24:57,793 Where were we? 480 00:24:58,040 --> 00:24:59,792 I was telling you: "Though you fuck me". 481 00:25:00,000 --> 00:25:02,719 You know that's a joke! All this is a joke! 482 00:25:02,960 --> 00:25:06,748 Everything in life is a joke: love,glory, even the stroke of genius ... 483 00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:09,760 Ah, the Caviar House! Let's go have a snack. 484 00:25:09,960 --> 00:25:10,949 No, thank you. 485 00:25:11,160 --> 00:25:14,470 I don't give a damn! I'm hungry! Haven't eaten since last night. 486 00:25:14,680 --> 00:25:15,829 I haven't had my present! 487 00:25:16,040 --> 00:25:17,553 Still your present! 488 00:25:17,760 --> 00:25:19,239 - What do you want? - A watch. 489 00:25:19,440 --> 00:25:20,634 You already have three! 490 00:25:20,840 --> 00:25:24,355 Then I'll have four. Give me a big slap! Slap me! Slap me! 491 00:25:25,680 --> 00:25:27,875 - Thanks, feeling better. - That hurt, didn't it? 492 00:25:28,080 --> 00:25:30,469 - It will vanish with the caviar. - How whimsical! 493 00:25:30,680 --> 00:25:32,955 Of course, yes, of course! 494 00:25:37,000 --> 00:25:40,037 Follow that idiot, that one, the one with a jar of hot water! 495 00:25:40,240 --> 00:25:42,993 All of them have one. Are you shooting a film? 496 00:25:43,200 --> 00:25:44,235 No, no, of course not! 497 00:25:44,560 --> 00:25:47,393 Where are you going? Where's the camera? 498 00:25:47,600 --> 00:25:49,318 Is that hot water for me? 499 00:25:49,520 --> 00:25:53,229 Don't stay in the middle! Who's this idiot? 500 00:25:54,000 --> 00:25:56,389 I have asked for a jar of hot water! 501 00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:02,028 Can I hold your arm? 502 00:26:02,240 --> 00:26:03,309 Leave me alone. 503 00:26:03,520 --> 00:26:06,671 Please! Let me be kind! My heart is inflated by Spring! 504 00:26:07,240 --> 00:26:08,673 You speak like Claude Rich. 505 00:26:08,880 --> 00:26:11,997 Yes, I've been told that often. Specially when I'm happy. 506 00:26:12,280 --> 00:26:13,713 I liked Claude Rich. 507 00:26:13,920 --> 00:26:15,114 Ah, yes! Me too! 508 00:26:15,440 --> 00:26:16,759 He was a fine actor. 509 00:26:16,960 --> 00:26:20,714 Yes, and you could smell something dangerous. 510 00:26:21,200 --> 00:26:22,553 The villain behind the smile. 511 00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:25,636 But why do we have to run? 512 00:26:25,840 --> 00:26:27,558 It's my wicked side! 513 00:26:28,000 --> 00:26:30,230 Are you crazy? See what you've done? 514 00:26:30,880 --> 00:26:33,348 I was here! I have seen everything! 515 00:26:33,720 --> 00:26:35,790 - What have you seen? - You hit that gentleman. 516 00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:38,275 Me? I did not have time! 517 00:26:38,480 --> 00:26:41,916 You don't need an hour to strike. Look. I'm striking you! 518 00:26:44,640 --> 00:26:47,200 Have you seen? Wasn't I good? 519 00:26:47,400 --> 00:26:48,799 - Magnificent! - Another one? 520 00:26:49,000 --> 00:26:49,716 Let's go! 521 00:26:55,480 --> 00:26:56,754 Ah, no! No! No! 522 00:26:56,960 --> 00:26:58,598 Ah, yes! Yes, yes! 523 00:27:20,920 --> 00:27:22,035 What's going on? 524 00:27:22,400 --> 00:27:23,515 Wait, don't move. 525 00:27:29,280 --> 00:27:31,236 What are you looking at? 526 00:27:32,080 --> 00:27:33,798 We'd like someone to tell us. 527 00:27:48,320 --> 00:27:49,912 I find it pretty beautiful. 528 00:27:50,560 --> 00:27:51,675 Don't you agree it's beautiful? 529 00:27:51,960 --> 00:27:54,110 Wait for me, I'm coming! 530 00:27:54,360 --> 00:27:56,555 Shut up! I'm viewing the exposition! 531 00:27:57,720 --> 00:27:59,836 How do you know it is an exposition? 532 00:28:00,480 --> 00:28:04,109 They expose a lot of things in the Champs Elys�es. 533 00:28:04,560 --> 00:28:06,915 It's hyper-realist... an American thing. 534 00:28:09,280 --> 00:28:11,350 It is well-built, by the way. 535 00:28:11,640 --> 00:28:12,595 Is it cold? 536 00:28:14,120 --> 00:28:15,235 What d'you mean? 537 00:28:15,680 --> 00:28:17,716 I'm asking you if it is cold. 538 00:28:19,120 --> 00:28:19,836 What? 539 00:28:20,040 --> 00:28:22,395 The statue! Is it cold? 540 00:28:24,160 --> 00:28:27,755 Isn't that Depardieu who smashed himself with his motorcycle? 541 00:28:28,440 --> 00:28:31,716 What motorcycle? There's no motorcycle. 542 00:28:31,960 --> 00:28:34,474 Yes, precisely! There is one, over there! 543 00:28:38,400 --> 00:28:39,719 Ah, this pisses me off! 544 00:28:39,960 --> 00:28:41,552 Shut up, we're seeing that motorcycle! 545 00:28:45,760 --> 00:28:47,432 That's not a motorcycle! 546 00:28:47,640 --> 00:28:48,789 Yes, it is a motorcycle. 547 00:28:49,640 --> 00:28:50,436 Hot? 548 00:29:03,600 --> 00:29:04,555 Are you dead? 549 00:29:05,080 --> 00:29:06,069 No! 550 00:29:07,840 --> 00:29:08,909 Drunk? 551 00:29:09,200 --> 00:29:10,349 Yes! 552 00:29:11,680 --> 00:29:14,956 What did I tell you? He's drunk. That's a good actor. 553 00:29:15,440 --> 00:29:16,998 Step aside, idiot! 554 00:29:21,440 --> 00:29:23,476 Doesn't come off, fucking helmet. 555 00:29:23,760 --> 00:29:25,193 Pull, damn! 556 00:29:25,400 --> 00:29:26,879 I'm pulling, shit! 557 00:29:28,280 --> 00:29:29,679 He must be swollen... 558 00:29:29,880 --> 00:29:30,915 Of course! 559 00:29:31,720 --> 00:29:33,312 You do it! 560 00:29:33,520 --> 00:29:34,111 No. 561 00:29:34,320 --> 00:29:36,550 - I don't know this guy. - Me neither. 562 00:29:39,440 --> 00:29:40,509 Andr�! 563 00:29:41,320 --> 00:29:42,833 Why's he shouting? 564 00:29:43,160 --> 00:29:46,436 I'm abandoned in the middle of the Champs-Elys�es! 565 00:29:46,760 --> 00:29:49,035 So what? Why the hell should I care? 566 00:29:49,240 --> 00:29:50,673 Leave him, he's a pain. 567 00:29:50,880 --> 00:29:52,711 You're right, he's a pain. 568 00:29:53,120 --> 00:29:53,996 Andr�! 569 00:29:54,200 --> 00:29:55,838 Yes, what d'you want from Andr�? 570 00:29:56,040 --> 00:29:58,713 - Forget him. - Wait, he's a cripple. 571 00:29:58,920 --> 00:30:00,717 For that reason! Precisely! 572 00:30:01,040 --> 00:30:03,235 Put me on the sidewalk! 573 00:30:03,720 --> 00:30:06,792 Which sidewalk? There are plenty! 574 00:30:07,160 --> 00:30:10,470 Don't be mean, come for me. They are going to wipe me! 575 00:30:10,680 --> 00:30:14,036 If we go, that means we're fond of you. 576 00:30:14,240 --> 00:30:16,993 No, that's not it, it's only about saving a guy. 577 00:30:17,240 --> 00:30:20,198 But that guy, if we don't like him? 578 00:30:20,400 --> 00:30:22,436 If we really dislike him? 579 00:30:22,640 --> 00:30:24,596 It's not real dislike! 580 00:30:24,880 --> 00:30:26,472 Yes! You may believe us! 581 00:30:26,680 --> 00:30:29,274 Me, I find you unpleasant! 582 00:30:29,480 --> 00:30:31,357 Me too! The same! 583 00:30:31,600 --> 00:30:33,158 Motherfucker! 584 00:30:33,440 --> 00:30:35,032 Assholes! 585 00:30:41,720 --> 00:30:43,073 Do you need help? 586 00:30:43,280 --> 00:30:44,952 No, thanks. Everything's fine. 587 00:30:45,280 --> 00:30:47,669 - Are you sure? - Completely. 588 00:30:50,080 --> 00:30:51,513 You don't seem very well. 589 00:30:54,320 --> 00:30:56,197 Who, me? 590 00:30:56,840 --> 00:30:58,239 Yes, you. 591 00:31:01,200 --> 00:31:02,918 Forget it. It's Depardieu. 592 00:31:03,400 --> 00:31:04,719 He crashed again? 593 00:31:05,160 --> 00:31:07,469 No, it's fake, it's for a film. 594 00:31:08,120 --> 00:31:09,473 A film you are shooting? 595 00:31:09,680 --> 00:31:11,591 Yes, yes, this very moment. 596 00:31:20,120 --> 00:31:23,157 - Where's the camera? - You can't see it. It's hidden. 597 00:31:24,400 --> 00:31:26,436 And where is it hidden? 598 00:31:26,640 --> 00:31:27,959 In my ass. 599 00:31:35,920 --> 00:31:38,388 - Where are the others? - What others? 600 00:31:38,600 --> 00:31:40,636 I was with Andr� Dussolier and Claude Rich. 601 00:31:40,840 --> 00:31:41,556 Ah, yes! 602 00:31:44,320 --> 00:31:47,869 Morons! Why are you hitting me on the head? 603 00:31:48,120 --> 00:31:49,075 Your papers! 604 00:31:49,280 --> 00:31:50,952 - My papers? What papers? - Your papers! 605 00:31:51,160 --> 00:31:53,549 I don't have papers, you're real morons. 606 00:31:59,120 --> 00:32:02,396 Look out! You want to be moved to Corsica? 607 00:32:02,840 --> 00:32:04,478 No,not Corsica, G�rard! Not Corsica! 608 00:32:04,680 --> 00:32:06,591 Be careful, I know people in the government. 609 00:32:06,800 --> 00:32:08,313 We're leaving, G�rard, we're leaving... 610 00:32:08,520 --> 00:32:09,555 Come on, move! 611 00:32:10,040 --> 00:32:13,715 Key! Motorcycle! Pull out! Move! Police headquarters! 612 00:32:13,920 --> 00:32:17,799 I also had a motorcycle! It exploded! Exploded! Headquarters! 613 00:32:31,120 --> 00:32:33,315 Is our group homogeneous? 614 00:32:34,120 --> 00:32:34,950 No. 615 00:32:35,560 --> 00:32:36,754 What d'you mean, no? 616 00:32:38,240 --> 00:32:41,073 Excuse me, but we're not a homogeneous group. 617 00:32:41,960 --> 00:32:43,996 Why isn't it homogeneous, then? 618 00:32:45,520 --> 00:32:47,158 There are enmities. 619 00:32:47,920 --> 00:32:49,319 Between who and who? 620 00:32:53,440 --> 00:32:55,715 It's Dussolier who sows discord. 621 00:32:57,520 --> 00:32:58,509 I sow discord? 622 00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:02,395 Yes, he's the one who sows discord. Dussolier's very disagreeable. 623 00:33:03,560 --> 00:33:04,470 With whom? 624 00:33:04,680 --> 00:33:05,669 With me. 625 00:33:07,120 --> 00:33:08,917 Claude Rich is also disagreeable. 626 00:33:10,000 --> 00:33:11,797 Claude Rich is usually nice, 627 00:33:12,000 --> 00:33:15,197 but with Dussolier, he gets very, very stupid. 628 00:33:15,600 --> 00:33:16,715 That's true. 629 00:33:17,120 --> 00:33:18,314 What d'you mean? 630 00:33:18,960 --> 00:33:20,678 Very bad, your influence on me. 631 00:33:20,880 --> 00:33:22,472 - Is it? - Very bad. 632 00:33:24,920 --> 00:33:26,035 I like Sami Frey very much. 633 00:33:26,320 --> 00:33:28,117 I also like him very much. 634 00:33:28,360 --> 00:33:29,839 I don't like him. 635 00:33:30,800 --> 00:33:32,279 I can't stand him. How can we like him? 636 00:33:34,680 --> 00:33:36,910 Me, I really can't stand you either. 637 00:33:37,400 --> 00:33:39,038 And you know exactly why? 638 00:33:39,240 --> 00:33:41,390 No... but it's strong. 639 00:33:41,920 --> 00:33:45,469 Funny, I also feel a certain displeasure. 640 00:33:46,600 --> 00:33:47,874 Towards whom? 641 00:33:48,960 --> 00:33:50,279 Towards you. 642 00:33:54,480 --> 00:33:55,071 Good! All right! 643 00:33:56,360 --> 00:33:58,078 There. I'm leaving the film. 644 00:33:58,280 --> 00:34:00,350 This is it, you've got it! 645 00:34:02,120 --> 00:34:03,394 Shitty film! 646 00:34:04,320 --> 00:34:05,594 Stinking film! 647 00:34:06,680 --> 00:34:07,669 Andr�! 648 00:34:08,920 --> 00:34:09,830 Andr�! 649 00:34:10,680 --> 00:34:12,033 I beg you, listen to me. 650 00:34:12,240 --> 00:34:13,832 What d'you want? What? 651 00:34:14,040 --> 00:34:16,554 We need you. Your absence creates a void. 652 00:34:16,880 --> 00:34:20,316 We're on three legs! Stay! Even Sami wants you to stay. 653 00:34:20,520 --> 00:34:22,272 Tell him to fuck off. 654 00:34:22,480 --> 00:34:25,040 Oh, that's disgusting! You're spitting in your soup. 655 00:34:25,680 --> 00:34:27,875 Mastroianni would never have left. Never. 656 00:34:28,080 --> 00:34:31,390 He did his job smiling. He always got up in a good mood. 657 00:34:31,640 --> 00:34:32,629 Like the sun. 658 00:34:32,840 --> 00:34:36,230 I'm not Mastroianni. No one can replace Mastroianni. 659 00:34:36,440 --> 00:34:37,634 Me, I cannot replace him. 660 00:34:37,840 --> 00:34:39,398 Who can? Any idea? 661 00:34:39,640 --> 00:34:42,313 Anyone who's good, no one will see the difference. 662 00:34:42,640 --> 00:34:45,438 If you say nothing, they'll think it's me. 663 00:34:55,560 --> 00:34:57,551 You have to stop being idiots. 664 00:34:58,360 --> 00:35:01,158 We all are talented, have desirable careers. 665 00:35:01,400 --> 00:35:03,311 There is no reason to be jealous. 666 00:35:05,680 --> 00:35:06,556 Well, 667 00:35:07,120 --> 00:35:07,996 Sami, 668 00:35:09,280 --> 00:35:10,918 I apologize to you... 669 00:35:11,800 --> 00:35:13,392 I've been aggressive, mean ... 670 00:35:13,960 --> 00:35:16,155 You're overreacting... You're overreacting... 671 00:35:16,480 --> 00:35:19,153 I was agressive and mean! Stop interrupting me! 672 00:35:19,360 --> 00:35:20,793 I was not interrupting you, I was trying to be kind. 673 00:35:21,000 --> 00:35:22,433 That doesn't work for you. You're not kind! 674 00:35:22,640 --> 00:35:24,949 Ms Dussolier, can I have an autograph? 675 00:35:25,160 --> 00:35:27,151 With pleasure. Right now. 676 00:35:27,880 --> 00:35:28,949 To whom? 677 00:35:29,160 --> 00:35:31,435 Charly, my husband. 678 00:35:31,640 --> 00:35:32,993 He collects autographs. 679 00:35:33,880 --> 00:35:35,791 I'll write "To Charly"... 680 00:35:36,720 --> 00:35:38,039 and I sign... 681 00:35:38,440 --> 00:35:39,953 Your name. Your name... 682 00:35:40,600 --> 00:35:41,635 Andr� Dussolier? 683 00:35:41,840 --> 00:35:42,716 For example. 684 00:35:42,920 --> 00:35:44,273 You don't care about the name? 685 00:35:44,480 --> 00:35:46,596 I know I like you without the autograph. 686 00:35:46,800 --> 00:35:48,199 I'll sign Piccoli. 687 00:35:48,440 --> 00:35:50,078 Well, that annoys me. 688 00:35:50,280 --> 00:35:51,269 You don't like him? 689 00:35:51,480 --> 00:35:52,595 Not really. 690 00:35:52,800 --> 00:35:55,633 He's a good actor, but he means nothing to me. 691 00:35:55,840 --> 00:35:57,558 I don't like him very much either. 692 00:35:57,760 --> 00:36:00,513 He doesn't seem to act, he's there, but he doesn't act. 693 00:36:00,720 --> 00:36:02,950 And you prefer an actor who really... 694 00:36:03,200 --> 00:36:04,394 Of course! An "actor". 695 00:36:04,800 --> 00:36:06,199 Like Sami Frey? 696 00:36:06,440 --> 00:36:09,113 Sami Frey, yes. I agree. 697 00:36:09,320 --> 00:36:10,469 I'll sign Sami Frey. 698 00:36:10,680 --> 00:36:12,671 Good idea. 699 00:36:12,880 --> 00:36:14,552 Sami, does it annoy you? 700 00:36:14,760 --> 00:36:16,910 Do not rack your brain. 701 00:36:17,480 --> 00:36:18,708 He's accommodating. 702 00:36:18,920 --> 00:36:22,037 I'll write "To Charly, with greetings from Sami Frey". 703 00:36:22,680 --> 00:36:25,035 And Jacques Villeret, do you like him? 704 00:36:25,320 --> 00:36:28,630 Villeret, oh my God, he's so funny! 705 00:36:29,040 --> 00:36:30,155 Because he is here. 706 00:36:30,640 --> 00:36:33,632 I know, I saw him. Of course he's here. 707 00:36:33,840 --> 00:36:36,593 I know. My God, he's so funny! 708 00:36:37,960 --> 00:36:39,598 Then I write "To Charly, 709 00:36:39,920 --> 00:36:43,629 with greetings from S. Frey and J. Villeret". 710 00:36:46,720 --> 00:36:49,598 I'll tell him I saw them at the same time. 711 00:36:51,200 --> 00:36:52,997 Two old mates together. 712 00:37:10,840 --> 00:37:14,230 What are they doing? We've got to hassle them. 713 00:37:15,640 --> 00:37:18,438 I've got a trainee in front of each van, 714 00:37:18,640 --> 00:37:20,119 knocking on the door until they come out. 715 00:37:20,320 --> 00:37:21,389 Why don't they come out? 716 00:37:21,600 --> 00:37:22,669 I don't know. 717 00:37:22,880 --> 00:37:25,235 Do I have to go there myself? 718 00:38:01,200 --> 00:38:03,270 You'll have to make do with what's left. 719 00:38:06,400 --> 00:38:08,038 I'm ready. 720 00:38:08,760 --> 00:38:10,432 You may go on. 721 00:38:18,960 --> 00:38:19,790 Engine! 722 00:38:20,760 --> 00:38:21,636 Rolling! 723 00:38:21,840 --> 00:38:22,750 Clapperboard! 724 00:38:23,200 --> 00:38:24,838 What do I write in the clapperboard? 725 00:38:25,040 --> 00:38:26,632 Cut, shit! What? 726 00:38:26,840 --> 00:38:27,875 What do I write in the clapperboard? 727 00:38:28,080 --> 00:38:29,274 I don't know! 728 00:38:29,560 --> 00:38:31,152 Write "Sicilian". 729 00:38:31,440 --> 00:38:33,112 - "Sicilian"? - "Sicilian". 730 00:38:33,440 --> 00:38:34,395 Silence! 731 00:38:37,120 --> 00:38:38,473 When you wish. 732 00:38:38,720 --> 00:38:39,630 Engine! 733 00:38:41,480 --> 00:38:42,276 Rolling! 734 00:38:42,520 --> 00:38:43,475 Clapperboard! 735 00:38:43,680 --> 00:38:45,033 Sicilian, one, first. 736 00:38:46,880 --> 00:38:47,790 Action! 737 00:38:48,680 --> 00:38:50,511 There won't be a lot of action. 738 00:38:51,040 --> 00:38:54,271 Then I don't say "Action!", I say "Go!" 739 00:38:55,040 --> 00:38:57,759 The best would be to say absolutely nothing... 740 00:38:58,680 --> 00:39:00,671 observe a moment of silence. 741 00:39:02,680 --> 00:39:05,035 I know when I must leave. 742 00:39:07,320 --> 00:39:09,117 D'you have a new store? 743 00:39:09,320 --> 00:39:10,514 New store. 744 00:39:10,800 --> 00:39:13,394 Then you can afford 10 minutes' silence. 745 00:39:15,560 --> 00:39:17,312 I am a silent guy. 746 00:39:18,600 --> 00:39:20,238 I have a silent mouth. 747 00:39:21,480 --> 00:39:23,675 Except that now I feel like talking. 748 00:39:25,480 --> 00:39:27,152 So, give me some news. 749 00:39:28,640 --> 00:39:31,074 How do the films go? Making a small profit? 750 00:39:32,760 --> 00:39:34,876 Can you face up the Americans? 751 00:39:35,800 --> 00:39:37,438 And your actors, how are they feeling? 752 00:39:39,000 --> 00:39:40,672 Actors are the most important. 753 00:39:42,880 --> 00:39:44,677 Me, I knew Gabin. 754 00:39:45,480 --> 00:39:47,038 Then also Lino. 755 00:39:48,520 --> 00:39:49,999 I filmed with them. 756 00:39:56,000 --> 00:39:58,514 Why isn't my chair with the others? 757 00:39:59,280 --> 00:40:01,157 We didn't know you were coming. 758 00:40:03,280 --> 00:40:04,474 And your manager? 759 00:40:05,640 --> 00:40:06,675 It's me. 760 00:40:08,240 --> 00:40:11,118 You should always have a chair for a friend passing by. 761 00:40:13,400 --> 00:40:14,913 A chair with his name on it. 762 00:40:15,360 --> 00:40:16,873 That's pleasant. 763 00:40:17,080 --> 00:40:18,593 He'll feel considered. 764 00:40:20,560 --> 00:40:22,357 Are there chairs for Bourvil? 765 00:40:23,280 --> 00:40:24,679 Simone (Signoret) and Yves (Montand)? 766 00:40:26,560 --> 00:40:27,595 Louis de Fun�s? 767 00:40:29,120 --> 00:40:30,439 We have all those chairs. 768 00:40:32,120 --> 00:40:33,758 Then take them all outside, 769 00:40:35,520 --> 00:40:37,192 so that we feel in family. 770 00:40:51,560 --> 00:40:52,629 Come in! 771 00:40:58,640 --> 00:41:01,438 We had asked for lunch at twelve, not three. 772 00:41:01,640 --> 00:41:03,437 - Sorry, I was busy. - With what? 773 00:41:03,840 --> 00:41:05,956 - Looking for a whore. - What whore? 774 00:41:06,200 --> 00:41:07,394 The one that took my role. 775 00:41:07,600 --> 00:41:09,591 You asked me to replace you. 776 00:41:09,800 --> 00:41:11,438 - Yes, but I came back. - Why? 777 00:41:11,640 --> 00:41:12,470 Because. 778 00:41:13,200 --> 00:41:16,237 Shit! Shit! A story that seemed to be magnificent! 779 00:41:23,680 --> 00:41:25,477 You may call me Josie, if you like. 780 00:42:17,640 --> 00:42:19,039 Good afternoon, Madame. 781 00:42:19,880 --> 00:42:21,791 I'm Jacques ViIleret. 782 00:42:23,560 --> 00:42:26,438 Have you met my companion Dussolier? 783 00:42:28,600 --> 00:42:30,397 We're sorry to bother you. 784 00:42:32,760 --> 00:42:35,593 May we come in? 785 00:42:36,080 --> 00:42:38,150 We'd like to talk to you. 786 00:42:38,520 --> 00:42:39,919 I'm not very... 787 00:42:40,120 --> 00:42:42,873 You look very well. Let's not lose time. 788 00:42:43,080 --> 00:42:45,116 It's a serious subject. 789 00:42:51,760 --> 00:42:53,034 What subject? 790 00:43:45,680 --> 00:43:47,910 You're going to tell me, or I'll cry! 791 00:43:48,960 --> 00:43:51,190 Do you know Jean-Pierre Marielle, Madame? 792 00:43:52,040 --> 00:43:53,632 - The actor? - Himself. 793 00:43:54,760 --> 00:43:56,591 Everybody knows J-P Marielle. 794 00:43:56,800 --> 00:44:00,634 Let's suppose one day he shows up at your door suddenly. 795 00:44:01,240 --> 00:44:03,196 What would you do? 796 00:44:05,200 --> 00:44:06,952 I'd offer him a drink. 797 00:44:07,280 --> 00:44:08,554 And us, are we shit? 798 00:44:08,760 --> 00:44:11,149 Does it cross your mind we may be thirsty? 799 00:44:14,440 --> 00:44:15,919 What do you want to drink? 800 00:44:16,320 --> 00:44:17,594 Double scotch. 801 00:44:18,280 --> 00:44:19,759 Cold beer. 802 00:44:24,760 --> 00:44:26,193 We come with you. 803 00:44:26,520 --> 00:44:27,794 What for? 804 00:44:28,400 --> 00:44:31,119 To see where you keep your bottles, all that. 805 00:44:38,640 --> 00:44:40,995 Are you planning to stay long? 806 00:44:41,320 --> 00:44:44,073 As long as it's needed to protect you, Madame. 807 00:44:44,640 --> 00:44:46,153 Against what? 808 00:44:47,600 --> 00:44:49,352 You're under threat, Madame. 809 00:44:49,800 --> 00:44:52,519 You still don't know it, but you're under threat. 810 00:44:52,720 --> 00:44:53,835 By whom? 811 00:44:57,600 --> 00:44:59,989 J-P Marielle is coming to visit you. 812 00:45:00,200 --> 00:45:01,713 - When? - Soon. 813 00:45:02,720 --> 00:45:04,233 We'll stay here. 814 00:45:04,880 --> 00:45:07,314 You never know what can happen. 815 00:45:07,800 --> 00:45:09,836 What do you mean? 816 00:45:10,240 --> 00:45:12,470 J-P Marielle isn't all right. 817 00:45:13,480 --> 00:45:14,674 What happened to him? 818 00:45:15,600 --> 00:45:16,794 He's not well. 819 00:45:18,560 --> 00:45:21,632 - Is it a bedroom? - No, no, the bed is not made. 820 00:45:21,880 --> 00:45:22,949 At 3 o'clock? 821 00:45:43,080 --> 00:45:44,479 We are staying here. 822 00:45:45,160 --> 00:45:48,436 Leave the door open, so that we can see and hear. 823 00:46:14,960 --> 00:46:15,949 Good afternoon. 824 00:46:17,480 --> 00:46:18,435 Monsieur... 825 00:46:19,720 --> 00:46:22,473 - Sorry to bother you. - No problem. 826 00:46:24,840 --> 00:46:26,558 Is your husband home? 827 00:46:28,480 --> 00:46:30,550 No, not now. 828 00:46:31,200 --> 00:46:32,792 Could I wait for him? 829 00:46:33,600 --> 00:46:34,555 Where? 830 00:46:36,120 --> 00:46:37,155 Here, for example. 831 00:46:38,680 --> 00:46:40,477 Is it convenient? 832 00:46:41,280 --> 00:46:42,952 I am Jean-Pierre Marielle. 833 00:46:50,120 --> 00:46:51,872 What time does your husband come home? 834 00:46:52,080 --> 00:46:53,433 It depends. 835 00:46:54,440 --> 00:46:55,998 What do you mean? 836 00:46:56,200 --> 00:46:57,758 Sometimes early, sometimes late. 837 00:46:57,960 --> 00:46:59,951 I'll wait for him even if he comes late. 838 00:47:05,000 --> 00:47:06,149 He doesn't sleep out? 839 00:47:07,200 --> 00:47:08,030 No... 840 00:47:09,280 --> 00:47:11,077 Except when he is travelling. 841 00:47:13,160 --> 00:47:14,513 But at present 842 00:47:15,280 --> 00:47:16,872 he isn't travelling. 843 00:47:17,240 --> 00:47:18,229 No, no. 844 00:47:18,840 --> 00:47:20,319 Would you tell me? 845 00:47:21,200 --> 00:47:22,394 I don't understand. 846 00:47:22,600 --> 00:47:24,591 Would you keep me waiting for him 847 00:47:24,800 --> 00:47:27,075 even if he was at Limoges? 848 00:47:27,840 --> 00:47:29,990 Why would I do that? 849 00:47:33,800 --> 00:47:36,314 However, you do not look unhappy. 850 00:47:37,760 --> 00:47:38,715 Well, no... 851 00:47:39,720 --> 00:47:40,709 actually... 852 00:47:43,680 --> 00:47:45,193 Not unhappy, but... 853 00:47:45,800 --> 00:47:47,358 no longer... 854 00:47:48,480 --> 00:47:49,993 What d'you mean? 855 00:47:53,800 --> 00:47:55,438 Tell me about your husband. 856 00:47:56,760 --> 00:47:59,797 Why should I talk about my husband with a stranger? 857 00:48:01,200 --> 00:48:02,838 I am not a stranger. 858 00:48:03,560 --> 00:48:06,120 I'm interested in your husband. I want to know things. 859 00:48:06,320 --> 00:48:07,594 But what things? 860 00:48:12,720 --> 00:48:14,517 Do you laugh with him? 861 00:48:16,240 --> 00:48:17,958 Yes, sometimes. 862 00:48:21,160 --> 00:48:22,593 Is he funny, the guy? 863 00:48:23,480 --> 00:48:24,879 Sometimes. 864 00:48:26,440 --> 00:48:27,953 But not very funny? 865 00:48:28,280 --> 00:48:31,397 Shit! I don't know any more. 866 00:48:31,640 --> 00:48:33,437 Tell me he is funny, I beg you. 867 00:48:33,640 --> 00:48:37,315 Yes and no, like everyone else. It depends. 868 00:48:43,160 --> 00:48:45,230 Does he play tricks? 869 00:48:47,120 --> 00:48:49,315 - What kind of tricks? - Mean tricks! 870 00:48:52,440 --> 00:48:54,715 - Did he play a mean trick on you? - Very mean. 871 00:48:55,040 --> 00:48:56,792 - Look, there he is. - Who? 872 00:48:57,000 --> 00:48:59,514 - My husband. Stay where you are. - I won't move. 873 00:49:11,120 --> 00:49:12,792 What's this guy doing here? 874 00:49:14,800 --> 00:49:16,756 I am Jean-Pierre Marielle. 875 00:49:19,680 --> 00:49:21,875 I know, I've recognized you. 876 00:49:22,760 --> 00:49:25,320 I am Jean-Pierre Marielle, "the real one"! 877 00:49:27,080 --> 00:49:28,195 Of course. 878 00:49:29,680 --> 00:49:30,749 The actor. 879 00:49:32,000 --> 00:49:33,638 I'm an actor too. 880 00:49:35,760 --> 00:49:36,909 May I know your name? 881 00:49:38,480 --> 00:49:39,515 Piccoli. 882 00:49:40,640 --> 00:49:41,470 Piccoli what? 883 00:49:43,120 --> 00:49:44,838 What d'you mean, "Picoli what"? 884 00:49:46,120 --> 00:49:48,395 There are many Picolis in the list. 885 00:49:49,920 --> 00:49:51,672 What do you want? 886 00:49:52,520 --> 00:49:54,476 I've come for my jar of hot water. 887 00:49:57,000 --> 00:49:59,434 Can you release my hand? 888 00:49:59,720 --> 00:50:02,871 I will, when I have my jar of hot water. 889 00:50:03,080 --> 00:50:04,479 - Darling... - Yes... 890 00:50:05,080 --> 00:50:08,311 Give the hot water to J-P Marielle, it seems important to him. 891 00:50:08,520 --> 00:50:09,839 Very important. 892 00:50:10,080 --> 00:50:11,957 I don't want to finish a puzzle 893 00:50:12,360 --> 00:50:14,078 and find out a piece is missing. 894 00:50:14,280 --> 00:50:15,713 Certainly. Certainly. 895 00:50:19,840 --> 00:50:22,274 An actor is in crumbs at the end of his career. 896 00:50:22,960 --> 00:50:24,234 That's right. 897 00:50:27,240 --> 00:50:29,800 Look, I believe my eyes are wet. 898 00:50:31,680 --> 00:50:32,795 Yes, indeed. 899 00:50:34,880 --> 00:50:36,233 Tears. 900 00:50:39,640 --> 00:50:41,676 You're seized by an emotion. 901 00:50:41,880 --> 00:50:44,030 I think I'm a good actor at last. 902 00:50:44,240 --> 00:50:44,956 Oh, yes? 903 00:50:45,160 --> 00:50:47,071 I needed an entire life. 904 00:50:47,720 --> 00:50:48,675 Really? 905 00:50:50,000 --> 00:50:53,231 In the beginning I acted, but not any more. 906 00:50:54,080 --> 00:50:56,389 Things come to me as in reality. 907 00:50:58,120 --> 00:50:59,439 I have never acted... 908 00:51:00,880 --> 00:51:02,438 Not even as a youth? 909 00:51:02,920 --> 00:51:03,909 Right away I was good. 910 00:51:05,160 --> 00:51:07,116 I remember. I remember. 911 00:51:07,320 --> 00:51:08,594 At ease in any role. 912 00:51:08,920 --> 00:51:10,353 Without effort. 913 00:51:10,720 --> 00:51:11,835 A parade. 914 00:51:12,040 --> 00:51:15,555 I had to force myself. It was necessary to put it over. 915 00:51:15,760 --> 00:51:17,910 Not to mention my voice effects. 916 00:51:18,160 --> 00:51:19,434 Ah, your famous voice effects! 917 00:51:19,640 --> 00:51:21,471 In fact, I was full of tics. 918 00:51:21,680 --> 00:51:22,510 Not always. 919 00:51:22,720 --> 00:51:23,869 Of course, indeed, always. 920 00:51:25,440 --> 00:51:27,317 My God, how I was bad! 921 00:51:29,080 --> 00:51:30,752 And now you're good? 922 00:51:32,480 --> 00:51:33,390 Very good. 923 00:51:34,760 --> 00:51:36,113 Erased all my tics. 924 00:51:37,320 --> 00:51:39,629 I'm like a rock. 925 00:51:39,840 --> 00:51:41,592 Remarkable trajectory. 926 00:51:41,800 --> 00:51:43,119 I think so. 927 00:51:43,400 --> 00:51:45,391 Here, your jar of hot water. 928 00:51:45,600 --> 00:51:47,238 Thank you. Very kind. 929 00:51:51,800 --> 00:51:53,791 Are you leaving with me or staying a while? 930 00:51:54,280 --> 00:51:55,713 Why would I leave? 931 00:51:56,160 --> 00:51:57,309 To go home. 932 00:51:58,240 --> 00:51:59,719 This is my home! 933 00:52:05,000 --> 00:52:06,797 Are you sure? 934 00:52:07,240 --> 00:52:09,470 It's my furniture, it's my wife! 935 00:52:09,680 --> 00:52:11,033 You compare your wife to a piece of furniture? 936 00:52:11,240 --> 00:52:12,719 No! Absolutely! 937 00:52:14,280 --> 00:52:16,316 This woman is not your wife. 938 00:52:16,520 --> 00:52:18,272 - Really? - I assure you. 939 00:52:19,120 --> 00:52:20,633 Whose wife is she, then? 940 00:52:20,840 --> 00:52:24,071 I don't know. A bastard with a cold fish face, 941 00:52:24,280 --> 00:52:26,475 who's a waiter at the Caviar House 942 00:52:26,680 --> 00:52:28,671 and who pretends being deaf when I speak to him. 943 00:52:28,920 --> 00:52:31,673 No shame being a waiter at the Caviar House! 944 00:52:31,880 --> 00:52:35,031 A waiter is a man like any other. He deserves some respect! 945 00:52:35,440 --> 00:52:37,078 Even if he goes to bed with your wife? 946 00:52:37,280 --> 00:52:39,316 Even if he goes to bed with my wife! 947 00:52:45,960 --> 00:52:48,394 And how do you know that? 948 00:52:49,760 --> 00:52:51,193 I've followed him. 949 00:52:52,240 --> 00:52:53,468 How far? 950 00:52:53,760 --> 00:52:54,988 This far. 951 00:52:56,040 --> 00:52:57,792 - To my house? - Affirmative. 952 00:52:58,920 --> 00:53:02,117 Every day around four, after his first shift ends, 953 00:53:02,680 --> 00:53:06,150 he leaves the restaurant and comes to meet your wife, 954 00:53:06,840 --> 00:53:09,798 with whom he stays at least until six, 955 00:53:10,000 --> 00:53:11,831 enough time for a shag. 956 00:53:14,160 --> 00:53:15,957 My love! My love! 957 00:53:16,160 --> 00:53:17,718 Don't be afraid, my darling. 958 00:53:17,920 --> 00:53:20,115 This idiot isn't going to separate us. 959 00:53:21,000 --> 00:53:22,319 And now you may go away! 960 00:53:22,520 --> 00:53:24,795 What are you waiting for? 961 00:53:25,920 --> 00:53:28,878 Everywhere you pass by 962 00:53:29,080 --> 00:53:31,992 nothing grows any more, except black flowers. 963 00:53:40,960 --> 00:53:42,678 I've seen some male nurses! 964 00:53:42,880 --> 00:53:44,313 Does it happen often, seeing male nurses? 965 00:53:44,520 --> 00:53:45,475 What male nurses? 966 00:53:45,680 --> 00:53:46,999 There are people who see male nurses. 967 00:53:47,200 --> 00:53:50,988 We don't see them! If we see them, we'll call you! 968 00:53:56,240 --> 00:53:58,629 - Don't get nervous. - I'm nervous, shit. 969 00:54:00,120 --> 00:54:02,111 - I don't like it. - Neither do I. 970 00:54:02,320 --> 00:54:04,276 He has to restrain himself! 971 00:54:06,720 --> 00:54:08,676 I forbid you to call my wife a vixen! 972 00:54:08,880 --> 00:54:09,995 I didn't call her that! 973 00:54:10,200 --> 00:54:11,952 - But you thought of it! - So did you! 974 00:54:13,080 --> 00:54:14,115 Exactly. 975 00:54:16,600 --> 00:54:18,431 You must admit that it's justified. 976 00:54:21,880 --> 00:54:23,791 I don't like the word "vixen". 977 00:54:25,400 --> 00:54:27,356 You have just been awesome. 978 00:54:28,000 --> 00:54:29,558 - You think so? - Magnificent! 979 00:54:30,040 --> 00:54:32,600 No, it's the reply that's magnificent, you only have to say it. 980 00:54:33,080 --> 00:54:34,798 The reply is beautiful, 981 00:54:35,000 --> 00:54:36,797 but you are deeply moving. 982 00:54:37,000 --> 00:54:38,433 It's my weakness... 983 00:54:38,640 --> 00:54:40,278 It's everyone's weakness... 984 00:54:40,880 --> 00:54:43,030 men and women at last together, 985 00:54:43,680 --> 00:54:45,796 equal before the great mystery... 986 00:54:46,960 --> 00:54:48,313 What mystery? 987 00:54:49,080 --> 00:54:49,990 Love... 988 00:54:50,480 --> 00:54:53,313 If I were you I wouldn't be so confident, 989 00:54:53,520 --> 00:54:55,909 cause you're a woman whose house anyone can get in easily. 990 00:54:56,120 --> 00:54:58,076 - You could get in? - Yes, so could you. 991 00:54:58,280 --> 00:54:59,076 I had the keys! 992 00:54:59,320 --> 00:55:02,517 And the waiter at the Caviar House, does he have the keys? 993 00:55:02,840 --> 00:55:06,116 Don't you ever look under your bed at night? 994 00:55:06,320 --> 00:55:07,594 Under my bed? 995 00:55:08,120 --> 00:55:10,759 In case an unscrupulous guy is there. 996 00:55:23,320 --> 00:55:25,197 I trust Genevi�ve. 997 00:55:26,920 --> 00:55:29,718 Fascinating, the stupidity of a loving guy. 998 00:55:30,720 --> 00:55:34,349 I met her in 1989 at Gers, 999 00:55:34,840 --> 00:55:36,273 we were shooting a film. 1000 00:55:36,960 --> 00:55:38,439 She was a makeup assistant. 1001 00:55:40,400 --> 00:55:41,389 And this? 1002 00:55:42,200 --> 00:55:43,235 Is he a makeup assistant? 1003 00:55:43,440 --> 00:55:45,510 - Do you go to bed with Villeret? - What an idea! 1004 00:55:45,720 --> 00:55:48,792 I find a guy in pyjamas in my wife's bedroom, 1005 00:55:49,000 --> 00:55:50,672 you don't have to be a genius! 1006 00:55:50,880 --> 00:55:53,030 - The first idiot he gets. - What did you say? 1007 00:55:53,240 --> 00:55:55,390 Me? Did I say something? 1008 00:55:55,600 --> 00:55:56,919 I saw your lips move! 1009 00:55:57,120 --> 00:55:59,031 How could you see them? You had your back on me. 1010 00:55:59,240 --> 00:56:02,232 I saw them in her eyes, your accomplice. 1011 00:56:02,440 --> 00:56:05,159 I can move my lips without a word! Look! 1012 00:56:06,200 --> 00:56:08,668 Repeat what you've just said, bastard! 1013 00:56:09,680 --> 00:56:12,069 Repeat it, if you have the guts! 1014 00:56:12,360 --> 00:56:15,636 Repeat it, comedian! Comedian! Repeat it! 1015 00:56:18,560 --> 00:56:21,677 There! I can see her! She's moving! She's moving! 1016 00:56:22,440 --> 00:56:23,429 She's moving! 1017 00:56:23,720 --> 00:56:24,789 What's the matter? 1018 00:56:26,440 --> 00:56:28,032 I see people on the corners. 1019 00:56:28,280 --> 00:56:29,998 - What corners? - All of them! 1020 00:56:30,200 --> 00:56:31,838 - Was it sudden? - Yes! 1021 00:56:32,720 --> 00:56:34,790 No, I've always seen them. 1022 00:56:35,000 --> 00:56:35,830 On the corners? 1023 00:56:36,040 --> 00:56:39,589 Sometimes on the corners, sometimes in the middle of the room,they look at me. 1024 00:56:39,800 --> 00:56:41,518 And on the street, they follow me. 1025 00:56:41,720 --> 00:56:43,597 In lifts, they are there. 1026 00:56:43,800 --> 00:56:46,234 No need to ask them "What floor", 1027 00:56:46,440 --> 00:56:48,317 they always go to the same as myself. 1028 00:56:48,520 --> 00:56:49,953 The ambulance is down on the street. 1029 00:56:50,520 --> 00:56:52,954 Proceed with discretion. Don't wake people up. 1030 00:56:57,800 --> 00:57:00,189 Don't fight, no scenes. 1031 00:57:00,400 --> 00:57:02,038 Relax, I'm very soft. 1032 00:57:02,240 --> 00:57:03,878 Even with a jar of hot water? 1033 00:57:04,080 --> 00:57:06,355 - I want to see a doctor. - Are you an actor? 1034 00:57:06,560 --> 00:57:08,835 - At the public's service. - Then, to Belgod�re. 1035 00:57:09,040 --> 00:57:10,837 - Ah, no, not Belgod�re! - Yes. 1036 00:57:12,600 --> 00:57:14,352 That's despicable, what you're doing. 1037 00:57:14,560 --> 00:57:15,834 We're doing our job! 1038 00:57:16,040 --> 00:57:17,519 Do you know who Belgod�re is? 1039 00:57:17,720 --> 00:57:20,996 The actors' doctor. Sorry. I didn't choose him. 1040 00:57:25,040 --> 00:57:26,234 Hello, my friend Marielle. 1041 00:57:27,040 --> 00:57:28,837 So, what's up? 1042 00:57:33,200 --> 00:57:34,474 Why doesn't he answer? 1043 00:57:35,160 --> 00:57:37,469 Marielle! It's me, Belgod�re! 1044 00:57:37,880 --> 00:57:39,313 Don't you recognize a friend? 1045 00:57:40,440 --> 00:57:41,839 Hello, Villeret. 1046 00:57:42,160 --> 00:57:43,434 Are we drinking at present? 1047 00:57:44,200 --> 00:57:45,633 Look out, he's leaving. 1048 00:57:45,840 --> 00:57:47,876 I'm here old man. 1049 00:57:48,120 --> 00:57:49,792 You know I'm here. 1050 00:57:50,560 --> 00:57:54,189 Come with him. He'll feel more comfortable. 1051 00:57:56,080 --> 00:57:58,514 Hello, Dussolier. How about that prostate? [Note: I know women do not have them, but that's what he says!!Olga] 1052 00:57:58,720 --> 00:58:01,393 Sometimes it bothers me. 1053 00:58:02,360 --> 00:58:03,588 We'll have to remove it. 1054 00:58:04,200 --> 00:58:06,839 Of course, it is not cancerous, but ... 1055 00:58:07,400 --> 00:58:09,436 without being pessimistic, 1056 00:58:09,640 --> 00:58:11,073 it might become. 1057 00:58:11,680 --> 00:58:14,035 But, eh, eh, actors are 1058 00:58:14,240 --> 00:58:15,275 incredible, 1059 00:58:15,480 --> 00:58:16,913 they don't let themselves be treated. 1060 00:58:17,360 --> 00:58:20,079 The doctor has to tell them: "You're magnificent", 1061 00:58:20,280 --> 00:58:23,192 "as fit as a fiddle", "how do you manage to rejuvenate?" 1062 00:58:23,400 --> 00:58:25,709 If you say all that, you're a good doctor. 1063 00:58:26,400 --> 00:58:28,391 On the other hand, if you say: 1064 00:58:28,760 --> 00:58:31,320 "We have to examine that, 1065 00:58:31,520 --> 00:58:35,308 make an echography... the results aren't very good... 1066 00:58:35,520 --> 00:58:38,956 This pain when you're examined is worrying... 1067 00:58:39,280 --> 00:58:42,033 actually, I'm worried". Then you should see them! 1068 00:58:42,480 --> 00:58:45,199 "What a complete idiot, this Belgod�re! 1069 00:58:45,400 --> 00:58:47,356 How sinister! 1070 00:58:47,760 --> 00:58:49,910 You get sick only by looking at him..." 1071 00:58:52,120 --> 00:58:54,509 I don't give a damn if I'm not funny. 1072 00:58:54,720 --> 00:58:56,358 I'm not here to be funny. 1073 00:58:56,880 --> 00:58:59,713 I'm not here to applaud you, but to take care of you. 1074 00:59:00,640 --> 00:59:03,154 You'll tell me that actors 1075 00:59:03,440 --> 00:59:05,317 are fragile people, 1076 00:59:05,520 --> 00:59:07,238 we have to protect them, 1077 00:59:07,680 --> 00:59:09,432 handle them with care. 1078 00:59:09,680 --> 00:59:12,990 Is that a reason to let them die 1079 00:59:13,200 --> 00:59:14,474 if we can save them? 1080 00:59:14,960 --> 00:59:18,236 We wonder if they can stand the test. 1081 00:59:18,960 --> 00:59:21,918 I tell them the truth. 1082 00:59:22,600 --> 00:59:26,479 Is it important, the truth? They don't listen. 1083 00:59:27,400 --> 00:59:29,436 Just a week ago, 1084 00:59:29,720 --> 00:59:31,438 what's her name... 1085 00:59:31,640 --> 00:59:33,915 this comic actress, 1086 00:59:35,240 --> 00:59:37,754 a pretty well-known girl, she has debuted 1087 00:59:38,560 --> 00:59:42,519 at the night spot with Jugnot, Blanc, Lhermitte... 1088 00:59:43,520 --> 00:59:44,396 A fat one? 1089 00:59:45,240 --> 00:59:47,515 Yes, rather fat. Rather coarse. 1090 00:59:48,120 --> 00:59:48,950 Balasko? 1091 00:59:49,400 --> 00:59:51,311 Yes, Josiane Balasko! 1092 00:59:52,040 --> 00:59:54,429 - I've never liked her. - She's nice. 1093 00:59:54,680 --> 00:59:55,635 A whore, yes! 1094 00:59:56,120 --> 00:59:58,031 Yes, a whore, anyway, 1095 00:59:58,240 --> 01:00:00,071 we're not here to judge. 1096 01:00:00,280 --> 01:00:01,679 Everyone should do as they please. 1097 01:00:01,880 --> 01:00:04,269 We're here only to worry 1098 01:00:04,560 --> 01:00:07,120 about everyone's state of health. Then she comes here 1099 01:00:07,760 --> 01:00:11,719 all smart and happy, you know her... 1100 01:00:12,360 --> 01:00:14,237 the joy of living. 1101 01:00:15,840 --> 01:00:18,195 I immediately stopped that joy of living. 1102 01:00:20,240 --> 01:00:22,071 You'll see what I did. 1103 01:00:22,280 --> 01:00:25,078 "My dear Josiane", I tell her, "how are you?" 1104 01:00:25,280 --> 01:00:26,633 "No diseases?" 1105 01:00:26,840 --> 01:00:29,877 "No, no, everything's fine, the machine works." 1106 01:00:30,080 --> 01:00:31,832 "The periods, abundant?" 1107 01:00:32,040 --> 01:00:33,951 "As always", she says boldly. 1108 01:00:34,160 --> 01:00:36,230 "Still eating meat?" 1109 01:00:36,440 --> 01:00:39,273 "I have eaten less." Be careful with meat, 1110 01:00:39,480 --> 01:00:40,833 it's dangerous now. 1111 01:00:42,160 --> 01:00:44,310 I know. There's nothing we can eat now. 1112 01:00:44,600 --> 01:00:46,670 Not even maternal milk is reliable. 1113 01:00:48,600 --> 01:00:50,033 It's true, no kidding, 1114 01:00:50,560 --> 01:00:52,630 if a woman eats calf's head very often 1115 01:00:53,000 --> 01:00:56,959 when she gives her chest the child sucks calf's head! 1116 01:01:00,480 --> 01:01:01,959 That was the moment when I 1117 01:01:02,320 --> 01:01:05,835 struck at the heart of her impregnable optimism. 1118 01:01:09,080 --> 01:01:12,868 "And that little black thing you have on your cheek?" 1119 01:01:13,440 --> 01:01:14,634 I ask her: 1120 01:01:15,600 --> 01:01:16,953 "Have you had it long?" 1121 01:01:17,520 --> 01:01:19,112 What? Where? 1122 01:01:19,400 --> 01:01:21,231 Just below your eye. 1123 01:01:24,280 --> 01:01:27,033 It's a beauty spot... 1124 01:01:29,400 --> 01:01:30,833 May I have a look? 1125 01:01:47,200 --> 01:01:49,156 I feel uneasy about it. 1126 01:01:50,680 --> 01:01:53,148 What d'you mean? 1127 01:01:53,920 --> 01:01:55,990 Have you had many sexual intercourses 1128 01:01:56,200 --> 01:01:57,599 since last time? 1129 01:01:58,720 --> 01:01:59,994 What last time? 1130 01:02:00,280 --> 01:02:01,998 The last time I saw you. 1131 01:02:03,120 --> 01:02:06,237 That was six months ago, I air myself once in a while. 1132 01:02:07,040 --> 01:02:08,234 With anyone? 1133 01:02:08,960 --> 01:02:10,871 What d'you mean, "anyone"? 1134 01:02:11,440 --> 01:02:14,113 A bisexual, for example. 1135 01:02:15,880 --> 01:02:18,792 I do not ask them what they are... 1136 01:02:19,360 --> 01:02:21,430 You practice sodomy, of course. 1137 01:02:45,760 --> 01:02:48,354 What about me? My disease? Who takes care of it? 1138 01:02:48,560 --> 01:02:52,109 Marielle, you drive me crazy. Dussolier has just slapped me. 1139 01:02:52,320 --> 01:02:55,630 Well, I've got much more to do than listen to the stupidity 1140 01:02:55,840 --> 01:02:58,832 of an actor who wants to remain as he was 30 years ago. 1141 01:03:00,920 --> 01:03:02,717 Ok, what's the matter with you? 1142 01:03:04,640 --> 01:03:06,278 Nobody listens to me any more. 1143 01:03:06,920 --> 01:03:08,433 And me? Does anyone listen to me? 1144 01:03:08,840 --> 01:03:10,751 I listen to you. 1145 01:03:12,360 --> 01:03:14,078 What do you expect me to tell you? 1146 01:03:15,080 --> 01:03:17,036 Something comforting. 1147 01:03:19,240 --> 01:03:20,958 You're crazy, Marielle. 1148 01:03:22,000 --> 01:03:23,513 I've thought so for a long time. 1149 01:03:23,720 --> 01:03:26,029 I won't say it as I like you so much, you're a good actor, 1150 01:03:26,240 --> 01:03:27,878 I still want to see you some time more. 1151 01:03:28,880 --> 01:03:30,598 I do not have the courage, 1152 01:03:30,800 --> 01:03:33,314 such a nice guy, who honors 1153 01:03:33,520 --> 01:03:36,398 the actors' profession. I apologize, but 1154 01:03:36,640 --> 01:03:38,073 I don't have the guts, I do not have the guts. 1155 01:03:39,200 --> 01:03:41,031 The guts for what? 1156 01:03:42,040 --> 01:03:43,314 To tell you the truth! 1157 01:03:45,080 --> 01:03:46,354 To tell me I'm crazy? 1158 01:03:47,120 --> 01:03:48,314 You're crazy. 1159 01:03:50,480 --> 01:03:51,754 How crazy? 1160 01:03:52,040 --> 01:03:54,873 What d'you mean? Crazy, old man. Crazy! 1161 01:03:56,320 --> 01:03:57,435 No treatment? 1162 01:03:58,720 --> 01:04:01,917 None known. The only one I know is... 1163 01:04:02,480 --> 01:04:03,595 The law forbids it. 1164 01:04:05,680 --> 01:04:08,752 - I want to know it! - I'm forbidden by law. 1165 01:04:08,960 --> 01:04:12,191 Do not insist, Marielle! And leave this office. 1166 01:04:12,400 --> 01:04:13,958 The consultation is over. 1167 01:04:17,280 --> 01:04:19,953 Tell what the treatment is, you swine! 1168 01:04:20,160 --> 01:04:21,912 Talk or I'll strangle you. 1169 01:04:22,120 --> 01:04:24,554 - Pig! - Release me, idiot! 1170 01:04:27,000 --> 01:04:28,479 I have an idea for you. 1171 01:04:28,680 --> 01:04:29,669 What idea? 1172 01:04:31,360 --> 01:04:32,634 Can you kill? 1173 01:04:32,840 --> 01:04:35,593 - Of course. - Then try killing somebody. 1174 01:04:37,120 --> 01:04:39,076 That's what can do you some good. 1175 01:04:39,280 --> 01:04:41,032 - You think so? - I'm sure. 1176 01:04:41,240 --> 01:04:43,390 The best way to find reality. 1177 01:04:43,640 --> 01:04:45,392 Yes, but who shall I kill? 1178 01:04:45,920 --> 01:04:47,512 You have no one to kill? 1179 01:04:47,720 --> 01:04:48,391 No... 1180 01:04:49,920 --> 01:04:52,992 - Kill a viewer. - Why a viewer? 1181 01:04:53,200 --> 01:04:55,634 Think of your films that are flops. 1182 01:04:56,600 --> 01:04:59,194 Films you love. 1183 01:04:59,800 --> 01:05:01,438 Sometimes good films. 1184 01:05:01,960 --> 01:05:03,359 True! Those morons! 1185 01:05:03,560 --> 01:05:05,471 Actors are dead. 1186 01:05:05,680 --> 01:05:06,999 Dead for not being loved. 1187 01:05:08,560 --> 01:05:10,232 I feel better already. 1188 01:05:12,240 --> 01:05:15,198 Viewers commit crimes. 1189 01:05:15,920 --> 01:05:17,353 You know what their weapon is? 1190 01:05:18,200 --> 01:05:19,235 Indifference. 1191 01:05:26,120 --> 01:05:28,953 If I say Patrick Dewaere what does it suggest to you? 1192 01:05:31,280 --> 01:05:32,713 He was a great artist. 1193 01:05:34,880 --> 01:05:36,279 He looked so gentle. 1194 01:05:37,240 --> 01:05:38,593 We miss him a lot. 1195 01:05:39,120 --> 01:05:40,678 We miss him a lot, yes. 1196 01:05:41,280 --> 01:05:42,269 Ok, move on! 1197 01:05:48,000 --> 01:05:49,831 He was so young... 1198 01:05:50,960 --> 01:05:52,951 When I see his movies I tell myself: 1199 01:05:53,160 --> 01:05:55,390 "Good Lord, what an injustice! What an injustice!" 1200 01:05:55,640 --> 01:05:57,835 I'm not going to talk about that junkie. 1201 01:05:58,040 --> 01:05:59,837 Such a feeble guy... 1202 01:06:00,400 --> 01:06:01,719 I never liked him. 1203 01:06:03,080 --> 01:06:04,957 And parking lots, do you like them? 1204 01:06:05,400 --> 01:06:06,674 No, I don't like them either. 1205 01:06:08,000 --> 01:06:09,877 Why don't you like them? 1206 01:06:11,280 --> 01:06:12,952 They remind me of Depardieu. 1207 01:06:13,600 --> 01:06:15,670 You don't like Depardieu either? 1208 01:06:15,880 --> 01:06:18,189 I used to like him, he was funny, then 1209 01:06:18,400 --> 01:06:22,234 one day I was going on holiday with my wife, the kids,the dog, 1210 01:06:22,440 --> 01:06:23,919 the station wagon full, ready to depart 1211 01:06:24,120 --> 01:06:26,873 he came head on talking on the phone, 1212 01:06:27,080 --> 01:06:29,071 in a bend he crashed into us. 1213 01:06:29,280 --> 01:06:31,430 I found him less funny. 1214 01:06:31,640 --> 01:06:33,232 Besides he had sex with my wife. 1215 01:06:33,800 --> 01:06:36,712 - Right there? - I was in a coma, 1216 01:06:36,920 --> 01:06:38,672 she was all twisted, he did it 1217 01:06:38,880 --> 01:06:40,791 - in front of the kids! - Are you kidding us? 1218 01:06:41,000 --> 01:06:42,991 - Of course. - Are you kidding us? 1219 01:06:44,160 --> 01:06:47,197 - Certainly! - Fuckhead! He thinks he's gonna fuck us! 1220 01:06:47,400 --> 01:06:49,550 We�ll take care of you! 1221 01:06:52,000 --> 01:06:54,468 - You see this fan? - Yes. 1222 01:06:57,080 --> 01:06:58,479 Going to remove the grate... 1223 01:06:58,680 --> 01:07:01,672 We're going to hold you horizontally, 1224 01:07:01,880 --> 01:07:02,995 like a salami sausage, 1225 01:07:03,200 --> 01:07:06,237 and we're going to slowly push your head into the fan. 1226 01:07:06,480 --> 01:07:07,629 What did you say? 1227 01:07:07,840 --> 01:07:10,638 - Are you deaf? - It's for the fan! Stop the fan! 1228 01:07:10,840 --> 01:07:12,751 How, you idiot? 1229 01:07:12,960 --> 01:07:16,396 I cannot hear at all. Shit! I don't want to die! 1230 01:07:16,600 --> 01:07:18,830 - What do you want? - Go to the cinema. 1231 01:07:19,800 --> 01:07:20,710 See what? 1232 01:07:20,920 --> 01:07:24,515 - Anything good on? - An impressive one 1233 01:07:24,720 --> 01:07:26,392 called "Sad Plain". 1234 01:07:26,600 --> 01:07:28,591 It takes place in the North. 1235 01:07:28,800 --> 01:07:31,360 It's about the anguish of a jobless guy in front of his mine. 1236 01:07:31,560 --> 01:07:35,075 Black and white, camera in hand, acted by amateurs. 1237 01:07:36,040 --> 01:07:38,235 - Go on, kill me. - Go see it. 1238 01:07:38,440 --> 01:07:41,000 - Not that one! To the fan! - If you go see it, you'll live! 1239 01:07:41,640 --> 01:07:44,791 I'm sick and tired of living like a jackal! 1240 01:07:47,400 --> 01:07:49,311 Are you Fran�ois N�gre? 1241 01:07:49,520 --> 01:07:51,431 - Yes... - I'm Jean-Claude Brialy. 1242 01:07:51,640 --> 01:07:54,154 - Yes... - You don't give a damn? 1243 01:07:54,360 --> 01:07:56,316 - Yes... - Thanks, I'm glad I came. 1244 01:07:56,520 --> 01:07:57,589 Do you know what time it is? 1245 01:07:57,800 --> 01:07:59,472 Actors live by night. 1246 01:07:59,680 --> 01:08:01,352 After theatre, we have supper. 1247 01:08:01,720 --> 01:08:04,518 Then a small Dom P�rignon at a friend's house. 1248 01:08:05,360 --> 01:08:07,874 - I don't have Dom P�rignon. - I thought so. 1249 01:08:08,080 --> 01:08:10,310 A guy like you doesn't have Dom P�rignon. 1250 01:08:10,520 --> 01:08:11,475 You cannot afford it. 1251 01:08:11,680 --> 01:08:14,911 Well, I bought one, 600 Francs. We'll have to try it. 1252 01:08:15,240 --> 01:08:16,593 Have you got champagne glasses? 1253 01:08:18,120 --> 01:08:19,997 Hide your enthusiasm. 1254 01:08:20,200 --> 01:08:21,633 I'm going to blush. 1255 01:08:22,120 --> 01:08:23,473 Well, shall we open it or not? 1256 01:08:23,680 --> 01:08:24,999 There's a draught. 1257 01:08:25,320 --> 01:08:26,594 What do you want? 1258 01:08:34,040 --> 01:08:35,632 Is your wife home? 1259 01:08:35,840 --> 01:08:38,149 Yes! Where do you think she should be? 1260 01:08:38,360 --> 01:08:39,918 - She might have left. - Where? 1261 01:08:40,120 --> 01:08:42,190 With another guy, or her mother's house 1262 01:08:42,400 --> 01:08:43,674 which ends up being exactly the same 1263 01:08:43,880 --> 01:08:46,189 according to the tradition of conservative theatre. 1264 01:08:46,800 --> 01:08:48,552 And I am a conservative actor. 1265 01:08:51,120 --> 01:08:53,509 Why aren't you sleeping? 1266 01:08:54,320 --> 01:08:55,275 Have you looked at the time? 1267 01:08:55,480 --> 01:08:56,595 Yes... 1268 01:09:00,000 --> 01:09:01,718 Your wife left for her mother's house 1269 01:09:02,400 --> 01:09:05,836 she dared do that and you cannot sleep. 1270 01:09:06,680 --> 01:09:08,910 You called her, she didn't answer. 1271 01:09:09,560 --> 01:09:11,516 That means two things: 1272 01:09:12,040 --> 01:09:15,555 your wife is elsewhere and your mother-in-law is deaf. 1273 01:09:16,200 --> 01:09:17,315 My wife never leaves me. 1274 01:09:17,520 --> 01:09:18,555 - Never? - Never. 1275 01:09:20,480 --> 01:09:22,311 Isn't that a burden? 1276 01:09:23,720 --> 01:09:25,631 It's the lightest burden. 1277 01:09:25,840 --> 01:09:27,558 How elegant! 1278 01:09:28,440 --> 01:09:31,034 Ah, that is a friend, do you mind? 1279 01:09:31,560 --> 01:09:34,233 It's Pierre Arditi, the theatre player. 1280 01:09:34,440 --> 01:09:35,839 - And cinema actor. - Yes, cinema. 1281 01:09:36,040 --> 01:09:39,077 - I also make films. - The whole world knows it. 1282 01:09:39,280 --> 01:09:41,510 You say "theatre", as if you said "shit". 1283 01:09:41,720 --> 01:09:43,676 - You've got a nerve! - Take it easy. 1284 01:09:43,880 --> 01:09:45,029 He drives me crazy! 1285 01:09:45,360 --> 01:09:48,397 My friend doesn't feel comfortable with his homosexuality. 1286 01:09:49,360 --> 01:09:51,032 What do I care? 1287 01:09:51,240 --> 01:09:52,070 And you? 1288 01:09:52,760 --> 01:09:53,988 Are you fulfilled? 1289 01:09:54,200 --> 01:09:56,156 - What? - With your wife. 1290 01:09:56,360 --> 01:09:57,509 Leave her alone. 1291 01:09:58,080 --> 01:09:59,798 May be she wants 1292 01:10:00,040 --> 01:10:01,359 some champagne. 1293 01:10:01,840 --> 01:10:03,273 Elle dort � poings ferm�s. She sleeps like a log. [dormir � poings ferm�s=sleep like a log, but the expression is literally translated as "sleep with clenched fists" There is a pun I cannot translate!] 1294 01:10:03,640 --> 01:10:05,870 How do you know that? 1295 01:10:11,080 --> 01:10:13,071 My wife has her fists clenched. 1296 01:10:14,000 --> 01:10:16,912 From night to morning and morning to night. 1297 01:10:18,080 --> 01:10:19,832 Sometimes when I open them 1298 01:10:20,640 --> 01:10:23,598 we see the marks on the flesh. 1299 01:10:24,520 --> 01:10:26,351 We adopted 2 children. 1300 01:10:29,160 --> 01:10:30,878 I'm ridiculous 1301 01:10:32,280 --> 01:10:33,998 but I welcome your visit. 1302 01:10:34,680 --> 01:10:36,272 I was waiting for you. 1303 01:10:37,560 --> 01:10:39,516 No one comes to see us. 1304 01:10:40,360 --> 01:10:43,318 No one dares disturb us, love isolates us. 1305 01:10:45,240 --> 01:10:46,832 It's like... 1306 01:10:48,280 --> 01:10:49,429 a church... 1307 01:10:50,600 --> 01:10:51,828 where... 1308 01:10:52,200 --> 01:10:53,838 you wouldn't dare enter. 1309 01:10:54,600 --> 01:10:57,114 Do you want to uncork the champagne? 1310 01:10:59,880 --> 01:11:01,472 Take a seat, gentlemen. 1311 01:11:02,520 --> 01:11:05,080 Sorry for the oilcloth, it's clean. 1312 01:11:15,240 --> 01:11:17,151 Do you recognize me? 1313 01:11:19,120 --> 01:11:19,916 Yes. 1314 01:11:21,760 --> 01:11:22,749 Is it her? 1315 01:11:26,680 --> 01:11:27,715 I don't know. 1316 01:11:29,640 --> 01:11:32,074 You remember? Quimper... 1317 01:11:32,840 --> 01:11:33,955 Crazy love 1318 01:11:34,640 --> 01:11:36,392 and my husband who tortured me, 1319 01:11:36,880 --> 01:11:38,313 whom I wanted to quit. 1320 01:11:38,800 --> 01:11:40,950 It was him, my husband. 1321 01:11:41,240 --> 01:11:42,229 Fran�ois... 1322 01:11:43,880 --> 01:11:46,075 who pretended to ask you for an autograph 1323 01:11:46,680 --> 01:11:49,558 and told me "no more bullshit, let's go." 1324 01:11:49,760 --> 01:11:50,431 It was him. 1325 01:11:53,000 --> 01:11:55,594 I lived with him, I didn't know I loved him. 1326 01:11:58,080 --> 01:12:01,231 A woman sometimes makes mistakes. 1327 01:12:02,080 --> 01:12:03,991 I've done them all. 1328 01:12:05,400 --> 01:12:07,231 At 18, orgies. 1329 01:12:09,720 --> 01:12:10,948 At 22, 1330 01:12:11,160 --> 01:12:13,674 I was chased by the police for being a murder accomplice. 1331 01:12:14,240 --> 01:12:15,832 I was dating a terrorist. 1332 01:12:16,600 --> 01:12:17,828 At 30, 1333 01:12:19,680 --> 01:12:22,672 I sold drugs to afford to buy them. 1334 01:12:24,840 --> 01:12:26,796 During all those years, 1335 01:12:27,000 --> 01:12:28,353 Fran�ois never left me. 1336 01:12:30,520 --> 01:12:32,875 I mean, he followed me ... 1337 01:12:36,560 --> 01:12:38,152 with his teacher's salary... 1338 01:12:38,520 --> 01:12:40,750 he protected me from afar... 1339 01:12:41,760 --> 01:12:44,274 he looked for me, he took care of me... 1340 01:12:45,200 --> 01:12:46,758 I ran away... 1341 01:12:46,960 --> 01:12:48,552 I stole his dough... 1342 01:12:48,760 --> 01:12:51,433 I sold my jewellery. 1343 01:12:53,160 --> 01:12:54,149 And him, 1344 01:12:54,800 --> 01:12:55,915 always there, 1345 01:12:57,760 --> 01:12:59,910 without any reproaches. 1346 01:13:07,560 --> 01:13:10,632 I am Maria Schneider. This scene makes me feel good. 1347 01:13:13,360 --> 01:13:15,476 And you, how's it going? 1348 01:13:16,880 --> 01:13:18,472 How have you been doing? 1349 01:13:19,360 --> 01:13:20,429 Well, 1350 01:13:21,040 --> 01:13:22,189 not bad... 1351 01:13:22,960 --> 01:13:24,313 I've been doing odd jobs. 1352 01:13:24,960 --> 01:13:26,518 I've met some women... 1353 01:13:28,880 --> 01:13:30,757 I agree with J-C Brialy, 1354 01:13:31,400 --> 01:13:32,628 it's a mistake. 1355 01:13:36,160 --> 01:13:37,878 A nice mistake, but a mistake anyway. 1356 01:13:39,840 --> 01:13:41,671 He knows it. He's sensitive. 1357 01:13:41,880 --> 01:13:43,472 Do you agree? 1358 01:13:45,560 --> 01:13:47,312 Do you agree we'd better separate? 1359 01:13:50,640 --> 01:13:52,119 Do as you like it. 1360 01:13:53,240 --> 01:13:55,071 I've already been coated. 1361 01:13:58,000 --> 01:13:59,558 Still, I'll miss you. 1362 01:14:01,760 --> 01:14:03,273 We may see each other sometime. 1363 01:14:04,200 --> 01:14:05,997 No, thanks, I'd rather not. 1364 01:14:09,360 --> 01:14:11,032 Forgive me, Jean-Claude. 1365 01:14:15,040 --> 01:14:15,756 Pierre... 1366 01:14:18,280 --> 01:14:20,111 I love women too much. 1367 01:14:22,520 --> 01:14:24,033 That's perhaps what I like. 1368 01:14:25,440 --> 01:14:27,431 Pardon? I don't understand. 1369 01:14:28,880 --> 01:14:30,472 Neither do I. 1370 01:14:32,480 --> 01:14:33,959 No one understands anything. 1371 01:14:35,480 --> 01:14:36,310 About what? 1372 01:14:37,760 --> 01:14:38,988 About men, 1373 01:14:40,960 --> 01:14:41,915 about women, 1374 01:14:44,480 --> 01:14:45,310 about everything. 1375 01:14:48,920 --> 01:14:50,239 It's high time I was there. 1376 01:14:50,440 --> 01:14:52,396 You leave them alone for 5 minutes, 1377 01:14:52,760 --> 01:14:54,193 and hoops, 1378 01:14:54,560 --> 01:14:56,312 they make you a marshmallow! 1379 01:14:56,720 --> 01:14:59,598 Be careful! Madame, don't stay in front of me! 1380 01:14:59,800 --> 01:15:02,598 - You see I'm in a hurry! - Why should I know you're in a hurry? 1381 01:15:02,800 --> 01:15:04,711 If I weren't in a hurry, I wouldn't walk like this... 1382 01:15:04,920 --> 01:15:06,148 but like this. 1383 01:15:07,840 --> 01:15:09,751 - Was I walking like this? - No! Absolutely! 1384 01:15:09,960 --> 01:15:10,949 How was I walking? 1385 01:15:11,160 --> 01:15:13,754 - Like this! - There you are! 1386 01:15:13,960 --> 01:15:16,190 You understand when you make an effort! 1387 01:15:18,480 --> 01:15:21,631 Don't stick to me! 1388 01:15:22,120 --> 01:15:23,997 But you are Michel Serrault! 1389 01:15:24,480 --> 01:15:26,277 No, I'm not Michel Serrault! 1390 01:15:26,480 --> 01:15:28,232 Do I look like Michel Serrault? 1391 01:15:29,600 --> 01:15:31,033 Just a bit of powder. 1392 01:15:31,240 --> 01:15:32,593 I'm not presenting the Actors. 1393 01:15:52,320 --> 01:15:54,595 Why do I have the worst place? 1394 01:15:55,560 --> 01:15:56,834 What place? 1395 01:15:58,640 --> 01:15:59,959 Where's the camera? 1396 01:16:00,840 --> 01:16:01,829 What camera? 1397 01:16:05,640 --> 01:16:07,949 - There's always a camera. - Where? 1398 01:16:08,880 --> 01:16:11,269 Do you often eat sitting like an amazon!? 1399 01:16:12,480 --> 01:16:13,754 When there's not a camera!? 1400 01:16:14,480 --> 01:16:16,675 An amazon? I don't understand. 1401 01:16:17,200 --> 01:16:18,758 The table is here, 1402 01:16:19,080 --> 01:16:21,196 and you stay like this, like an amazon. 1403 01:16:22,080 --> 01:16:23,877 Why are you sitting like that? 1404 01:16:25,960 --> 01:16:27,598 He, too, is like you! 1405 01:16:30,640 --> 01:16:32,710 Aren't you facing the camera? 1406 01:16:34,160 --> 01:16:35,718 Isn't the camera around? 1407 01:16:37,840 --> 01:16:40,718 Marielle, he doesn't give a damn, he's in the middle. 1408 01:16:42,320 --> 01:16:44,356 He can't be missed! 1409 01:16:46,080 --> 01:16:48,310 Well, then... 1410 01:16:48,640 --> 01:16:49,675 if this is the way it is, 1411 01:16:50,240 --> 01:16:51,389 I'll sit like this. 1412 01:16:51,640 --> 01:16:52,311 There! 1413 01:16:52,800 --> 01:16:54,791 It's a natural position! 1414 01:16:55,000 --> 01:16:56,433 Yes, but it annoys me. 1415 01:16:56,920 --> 01:16:58,433 What are you saying? 1416 01:16:58,680 --> 01:17:00,636 I'm saying you're annoying me. 1417 01:17:01,400 --> 01:17:02,389 Well, 1418 01:17:03,160 --> 01:17:04,229 I'm annoying you. 1419 01:17:05,640 --> 01:17:08,154 - And why am I annoying you? - You're on my wife's back. 1420 01:17:08,840 --> 01:17:09,750 Am I? But... 1421 01:17:11,200 --> 01:17:13,668 - What's the problem? - You're looking at her nape. 1422 01:17:14,640 --> 01:17:16,835 She feels your look, that bothers her. 1423 01:17:17,520 --> 01:17:18,919 You're too near her. 1424 01:17:21,280 --> 01:17:22,952 Excuse me, I'm Michel Serrault. 1425 01:17:23,160 --> 01:17:25,799 I'm shooting a film, above all, don't shout. 1426 01:17:26,000 --> 01:17:29,834 Go on eating, and everything will be ok. 1427 01:17:30,240 --> 01:17:32,276 I forbid you to talk to my wife! 1428 01:17:33,520 --> 01:17:34,669 I am Michel Serrault! 1429 01:17:35,000 --> 01:17:36,672 And I'm Jacques Fran�ois! 1430 01:17:36,920 --> 01:17:38,638 Good day! How's it going? 1431 01:17:38,840 --> 01:17:40,353 Don't take my hand! The bill! 1432 01:17:40,560 --> 01:17:42,152 - I'm inviting! - No way! 1433 01:17:42,360 --> 01:17:44,396 Yes, you and your wife. 1434 01:17:44,600 --> 01:17:46,352 I'm not the wife of J. Fran�ois. 1435 01:17:47,200 --> 01:17:49,350 Stop reminding me that. 1436 01:17:49,880 --> 01:17:53,111 All these people, this milieu I hate, 1437 01:17:53,640 --> 01:17:55,039 which has harmed me so much! 1438 01:17:55,280 --> 01:17:57,032 Leave me alone, 1439 01:17:57,240 --> 01:18:00,437 all of you! Puppets! Jesters! 1440 01:18:01,760 --> 01:18:04,399 It's not me who's pretending! 1441 01:18:04,720 --> 01:18:06,790 I have a heart that beats! 1442 01:18:07,160 --> 01:18:08,752 My tears are real! 1443 01:18:10,680 --> 01:18:11,396 Well, 1444 01:18:14,160 --> 01:18:15,513 listen, 1445 01:18:15,880 --> 01:18:17,836 I cannot work under these conditions! 1446 01:18:19,680 --> 01:18:23,559 Rebuild the setting, and when you're ready, 1447 01:18:23,760 --> 01:18:26,558 call my lawyer and my agent, both! 1448 01:19:22,800 --> 01:19:25,678 Would you have a small note for a poor actor? 1449 01:19:26,640 --> 01:19:27,993 Aren't you Jean-Paul Belmondo? 1450 01:19:28,760 --> 01:19:30,239 Don't give me away to the cops. 1451 01:19:30,440 --> 01:19:32,192 - What cops? - The special ones. 1452 01:19:32,400 --> 01:19:33,355 The actors' cops. 1453 01:19:34,320 --> 01:19:36,993 - Actors' cops? - 8 days they've been after me. 1454 01:19:45,120 --> 01:19:47,998 Are you Michel Serrault? 1455 01:19:48,320 --> 01:19:50,038 Who's Michel Serrault? 1456 01:19:51,040 --> 01:19:51,870 An idiot. 1457 01:19:52,760 --> 01:19:53,590 Is he? 1458 01:19:54,480 --> 01:19:56,311 An idiot who plays an idiot. 1459 01:19:57,480 --> 01:19:59,277 That's often like that. 1460 01:19:59,640 --> 01:20:02,552 Except that, in this case, he also risks his skin. 1461 01:20:02,920 --> 01:20:03,670 Does he? 1462 01:20:04,840 --> 01:20:05,955 Absolutely. 1463 01:20:06,520 --> 01:20:08,556 He plays the idiot, he plays the idiot... 1464 01:20:08,760 --> 01:20:10,193 How does he play the idiot? 1465 01:20:11,160 --> 01:20:13,116 For example, he refuses to cooperate. 1466 01:20:14,040 --> 01:20:14,870 With whom? 1467 01:20:15,240 --> 01:20:16,150 With us. 1468 01:20:19,200 --> 01:20:20,269 I'm sorry, 1469 01:20:21,240 --> 01:20:23,595 I've been unwell, 1470 01:20:25,960 --> 01:20:27,518 I haven't left my room 1471 01:20:27,720 --> 01:20:29,312 and with this migraine, 1472 01:20:29,520 --> 01:20:31,078 I did not watch TV. 1473 01:20:32,480 --> 01:20:36,109 Well, I watched it, but it was off. 1474 01:20:37,000 --> 01:20:38,319 Was it interesting? 1475 01:20:40,600 --> 01:20:42,113 Not bad, not bad. 1476 01:20:43,120 --> 01:20:44,838 As interesting as if it were on, 1477 01:20:45,760 --> 01:20:47,557 for an old man like me, 1478 01:20:48,640 --> 01:20:49,789 and who, therefore, 1479 01:20:50,920 --> 01:20:53,753 has known a time in which TV was 1480 01:20:54,240 --> 01:20:55,275 neither on 1481 01:20:56,040 --> 01:20:57,155 nor off. 1482 01:20:58,560 --> 01:21:00,915 That was, in my opinion, when it was most noticed... 1483 01:21:01,120 --> 01:21:02,473 by its absence. 1484 01:21:03,560 --> 01:21:05,357 All this to say that... 1485 01:21:06,160 --> 01:21:08,435 I'm not very up-to-date. 1486 01:21:08,880 --> 01:21:10,472 You'll understand. Follow me. 1487 01:21:10,680 --> 01:21:12,955 I can't, I'm tied up. 1488 01:21:13,160 --> 01:21:14,275 With your chair! 1489 01:21:34,720 --> 01:21:36,551 Do you know this man? 1490 01:21:36,840 --> 01:21:38,671 No. Never seen him. 1491 01:21:40,000 --> 01:21:41,319 And him, does he know you? 1492 01:21:41,520 --> 01:21:44,034 Ask him. 1493 01:21:45,800 --> 01:21:47,631 As everyone else, he won't answer. 1494 01:21:48,200 --> 01:21:49,315 Why not? 1495 01:21:50,440 --> 01:21:51,793 He sems not to be very fond of us. 1496 01:21:52,280 --> 01:21:54,714 However, he is a smart guy. 1497 01:21:55,720 --> 01:21:57,039 I agree with you. 1498 01:21:57,600 --> 01:21:58,749 We understand nothing. 1499 01:22:00,120 --> 01:22:01,872 What does he do for a living? 1500 01:22:02,280 --> 01:22:03,395 He's an actor. 1501 01:22:04,880 --> 01:22:05,915 That's bad! 1502 01:22:06,240 --> 01:22:07,275 I agree. 1503 01:22:08,120 --> 01:22:09,997 What're you going to do with him? 1504 01:22:10,960 --> 01:22:12,075 Execute him. 1505 01:22:12,760 --> 01:22:13,749 Well, yes... 1506 01:22:14,800 --> 01:22:16,552 what else can you do!? 1507 01:22:17,080 --> 01:22:17,990 It's a pity. 1508 01:22:18,640 --> 01:22:19,709 Look, 1509 01:22:20,360 --> 01:22:22,749 he's not a great actor, I don't know him. 1510 01:22:23,760 --> 01:22:24,988 Do you know others? 1511 01:22:27,680 --> 01:22:29,272 Well, I, actors... 1512 01:22:30,560 --> 01:22:31,709 You don't go to the cinema? 1513 01:22:32,200 --> 01:22:33,474 The least I can. 1514 01:22:33,840 --> 01:22:35,319 - Theatre? - Never! 1515 01:22:36,200 --> 01:22:37,633 By the way, I never go anywhere! 1516 01:22:37,840 --> 01:22:39,114 Not even toilets! 1517 01:22:39,760 --> 01:22:41,512 That's why you're always bristly! 1518 01:22:42,400 --> 01:22:44,356 How d'you know I'm always bristly? 1519 01:22:44,560 --> 01:22:45,629 You're famous for it! 1520 01:22:45,840 --> 01:22:47,592 - Who? - You! Michel Serrault! 1521 01:22:48,320 --> 01:22:50,356 I'm not Michel Serrault! 1522 01:22:50,640 --> 01:22:51,868 Then who are you? 1523 01:22:52,440 --> 01:22:54,032 I don't know who I am any more. 1524 01:22:54,320 --> 01:22:56,311 I've been disturbed all my life! 1525 01:22:56,840 --> 01:22:58,478 I am dilapidated! 1526 01:22:58,680 --> 01:23:01,148 I want something to sit on! 1527 01:23:01,840 --> 01:23:03,478 Use your chair! 1528 01:23:07,040 --> 01:23:07,790 Action! 1529 01:23:14,720 --> 01:23:18,508 That was the execution of an actor who hasn't cooperated. 1530 01:23:19,120 --> 01:23:20,838 What does it mean, "cooperate"? 1531 01:23:22,000 --> 01:23:24,230 Give us other actors' names. 1532 01:23:28,200 --> 01:23:30,077 I had fun... 1533 01:23:48,920 --> 01:23:50,956 You know, I always had fun... 1534 01:23:55,920 --> 01:23:58,992 And after you had fun, what did you do? 1535 01:23:59,440 --> 01:24:00,873 I went on having fun. 1536 01:24:02,080 --> 01:24:03,593 You had fun all the time? 1537 01:24:04,000 --> 01:24:04,955 All the time... 1538 01:24:07,640 --> 01:24:09,198 even during the night... 1539 01:24:10,080 --> 01:24:11,513 I dreamt I had fun. 1540 01:24:23,200 --> 01:24:25,111 For example, this very moment, 1541 01:24:25,360 --> 01:24:26,793 I'm having fun. 1542 01:24:37,600 --> 01:24:39,079 He's not Belmondo. 1543 01:24:40,040 --> 01:24:42,554 All right, Belmondo always had a ... 1544 01:24:44,840 --> 01:24:47,035 but not to this point! 1545 01:24:48,480 --> 01:24:50,391 This guy is just a vegetable! 1546 01:24:53,120 --> 01:24:54,553 Now, my boy, 1547 01:24:55,720 --> 01:24:57,438 you enjoyed yourself a lot? 1548 01:24:58,880 --> 01:25:00,393 I had fun... 1549 01:25:00,680 --> 01:25:03,831 When you say "fun", then... 1550 01:25:05,040 --> 01:25:08,510 was it real "fun" or simply "fun"? 1551 01:25:09,200 --> 01:25:11,668 - I had "fun"! - Ah, well... 1552 01:25:13,080 --> 01:25:15,992 You've done right because all this merriment, 1553 01:25:16,280 --> 01:25:18,157 I think it's over. 1554 01:25:18,520 --> 01:25:20,636 - I had fun... - Yes... 1555 01:25:20,840 --> 01:25:23,513 Look, me too, when I think of it. 1556 01:25:24,400 --> 01:25:26,470 I used to laugh my head off. 1557 01:25:37,360 --> 01:25:38,998 Do you think I'm an idiot? 1558 01:25:39,360 --> 01:25:40,475 Not necessarily. 1559 01:25:42,560 --> 01:25:43,709 Not necessarily, 1560 01:25:45,040 --> 01:25:46,234 a guy who looks like an idiot... 1561 01:25:50,160 --> 01:25:51,752 isn't necessarily an idiot. 1562 01:25:53,240 --> 01:25:56,471 There are exceptions. 1563 01:25:57,880 --> 01:26:00,997 They're uncommon, one must say... 1564 01:26:05,800 --> 01:26:06,755 And like this? 1565 01:26:07,360 --> 01:26:08,554 Do you still have fun? 1566 01:26:08,960 --> 01:26:11,633 Well, no, things become very different. 1567 01:26:14,000 --> 01:26:16,036 I'll stop at once fooling around. 1568 01:26:20,280 --> 01:26:21,633 Good day, Gentlemen. 1569 01:26:22,360 --> 01:26:23,634 Congratulations. 1570 01:26:24,600 --> 01:26:26,192 It's an incredible job. 1571 01:26:38,760 --> 01:26:41,069 What can I do for you? Tell me. 1572 01:26:41,840 --> 01:26:43,592 What's your problem? 1573 01:26:46,520 --> 01:26:48,112 I had fun... 1574 01:26:48,320 --> 01:26:51,949 - Yes, we know! - Sometimes, with my chums, 1575 01:26:52,160 --> 01:26:53,878 we had so much fun that we pissed everywhere! 1576 01:26:54,960 --> 01:26:55,836 For laughing! 1577 01:26:56,560 --> 01:26:58,676 Shut up this bloke, 1578 01:26:58,880 --> 01:27:01,474 - I can't take him any longer. - Once, in Manaos... 1579 01:27:03,960 --> 01:27:06,599 You're going to shut up your mouth, you madman! 1580 01:27:07,480 --> 01:27:09,436 Can't you see what's gonna happen to both of us? 1581 01:27:10,080 --> 01:27:11,832 We have to find a gimmick! 1582 01:27:12,040 --> 01:27:13,519 They kill actors! 1583 01:27:18,640 --> 01:27:20,392 Why are you killing all the actors? 1584 01:27:23,800 --> 01:27:25,631 Why don't you care about actors? 1585 01:27:26,040 --> 01:27:27,189 Aren't you one of them? 1586 01:27:27,560 --> 01:27:28,879 Yes, finally. 1587 01:27:29,840 --> 01:27:31,432 That's why I don't care. 1588 01:27:32,240 --> 01:27:33,514 What do you do for a living? 1589 01:27:33,800 --> 01:27:34,789 Nothing. 1590 01:27:37,200 --> 01:27:38,713 I'm a stockholder. 1591 01:27:39,320 --> 01:27:41,550 My parents left me some money. 1592 01:27:41,760 --> 01:27:43,796 - I increased it. - Then, 1593 01:27:44,200 --> 01:27:46,794 you could have given me a small note to buy a bottle! 1594 01:27:47,000 --> 01:27:49,195 - Shut up. - They say you're stingy. 1595 01:27:49,400 --> 01:27:51,595 Will you shut up, for once in your life? 1596 01:27:53,000 --> 01:27:55,673 Don't you see we have to fool them?! 1597 01:27:56,880 --> 01:27:59,030 We have to try and deceive them! 1598 01:28:00,000 --> 01:28:01,638 Don't listen to him, guys. 1599 01:28:02,280 --> 01:28:03,429 I know him, 1600 01:28:04,200 --> 01:28:05,792 he'll do anything for a role. 1601 01:28:06,080 --> 01:28:09,038 He'll get in front of his chums so that we see it's him. 1602 01:28:09,800 --> 01:28:11,677 That's rubbish you're saying. 1603 01:28:11,960 --> 01:28:12,836 Is it? 1604 01:28:13,200 --> 01:28:14,155 It's mean, 1605 01:28:14,720 --> 01:28:17,393 unfair and altogether absurd. 1606 01:28:17,920 --> 01:28:18,670 Why? 1607 01:28:20,280 --> 01:28:22,111 This guy is too idiot, 1608 01:28:22,560 --> 01:28:24,551 he can't be Belmondo! 1609 01:28:25,440 --> 01:28:27,396 Belmondo is not such an idiot! 1610 01:28:27,600 --> 01:28:29,113 Listen to me, guys, listen! 1611 01:28:30,320 --> 01:28:33,198 I have to tell you why I had fun. 1612 01:28:34,520 --> 01:28:35,999 I'm a good-humoured guy. 1613 01:28:36,880 --> 01:28:38,108 I was born and... 1614 01:28:39,240 --> 01:28:40,912 I'm gonna die good-humoured. 1615 01:28:43,080 --> 01:28:45,116 I never got pissed off by my fears. 1616 01:28:46,080 --> 01:28:49,038 Anyway, I was kind enough 1617 01:28:49,680 --> 01:28:52,274 not to share them. 1618 01:28:53,440 --> 01:28:55,192 I must tell you: 1619 01:28:56,080 --> 01:28:57,559 you're assholes. 1620 01:28:58,800 --> 01:28:59,516 Come on, 1621 01:29:01,360 --> 01:29:02,270 knock me down, 1622 01:29:03,680 --> 01:29:05,238 cut me to pieces. 1623 01:29:10,560 --> 01:29:11,629 Have you seen that, 1624 01:29:12,960 --> 01:29:14,951 a guy that dies having fun? 1625 01:29:22,920 --> 01:29:25,036 Go sit with the others 1626 01:29:25,320 --> 01:29:26,878 and not even a word! 1627 01:29:48,680 --> 01:29:49,635 Jacques... 1628 01:29:50,680 --> 01:29:51,954 Listen to me... 1629 01:29:52,600 --> 01:29:54,272 Let's think of our public. 1630 01:29:59,120 --> 01:30:00,394 Have you understood? 1631 01:30:01,080 --> 01:30:04,470 Have you seen what happened to Marielle, a great actor? 1632 01:30:05,120 --> 01:30:06,348 Shall I kill another? 1633 01:30:07,400 --> 01:30:08,515 A Villeret, for example? 1634 01:30:10,560 --> 01:30:11,675 A Dussolier? 1635 01:30:13,400 --> 01:30:15,675 Isn't it fun, to play the bad guy? 1636 01:30:16,360 --> 01:30:18,112 Now I have the good part! 1637 01:30:19,680 --> 01:30:22,592 I'm sick and tired of playing society men! 1638 01:30:22,800 --> 01:30:24,552 Fuck them, society men. 1639 01:30:25,400 --> 01:30:27,595 I, too, can say "my balls"! 1640 01:30:27,800 --> 01:30:29,438 "My cock and my dick"! 1641 01:30:29,960 --> 01:30:32,110 "Fucked off"! "Son of a bitch"! 1642 01:30:33,480 --> 01:30:35,357 "Motherfucker"! 1643 01:30:36,400 --> 01:30:37,879 "Look, it's raining". 1644 01:30:42,200 --> 01:30:44,668 Why am I so tired? 1645 01:30:47,720 --> 01:30:49,836 I'm not an old actor! 1646 01:30:50,640 --> 01:30:52,710 I'm very much dangerous. 1647 01:30:55,440 --> 01:30:57,954 A jar of hot water. Anyone interested? 1648 01:30:58,360 --> 01:31:00,157 And me, who's interested in me? 1649 01:31:00,800 --> 01:31:02,518 I'm not even playing a character! 1650 01:31:03,200 --> 01:31:05,156 And where this shit's director? 1651 01:31:05,800 --> 01:31:07,518 Where's that moron Blier? 1652 01:31:07,960 --> 01:31:10,520 He doesn't give a damn, he's shooting another film. 1653 01:31:23,360 --> 01:31:26,477 Attention, everyone, we're going to shoot. 1654 01:31:27,760 --> 01:31:28,954 - Hubert! - Yes? 1655 01:31:29,440 --> 01:31:32,352 - Time for the rain? - Yes, Bertrand. Ready. 1656 01:31:32,760 --> 01:31:35,228 Attention, send the rain! 1657 01:31:40,320 --> 01:31:41,230 Engine! 1658 01:31:42,000 --> 01:31:42,955 - Rolling! - Announce! 1659 01:31:44,040 --> 01:31:45,439 31 First! 1660 01:31:48,680 --> 01:31:49,556 Action! 1661 01:31:59,200 --> 01:32:02,192 Anyway, I don't care about this slut! 1662 01:32:05,800 --> 01:32:07,631 If she's dead or alive. 1663 01:32:11,760 --> 01:32:13,637 She's a slut, that's all. 1664 01:32:15,960 --> 01:32:17,188 Cut! 1665 01:32:17,880 --> 01:32:20,440 Bitch, a drop on my back! 1666 01:32:21,880 --> 01:32:23,438 Not a real bitch! 1667 01:32:26,560 --> 01:32:28,391 There's something I don't like 1668 01:32:28,600 --> 01:32:29,510 What? 1669 01:32:30,200 --> 01:32:32,316 Isn't that a bit misogynic? 1670 01:32:32,760 --> 01:32:35,991 You're much fun! The word has a connotation. 1671 01:32:36,200 --> 01:32:38,031 Maybe less violence. 1672 01:32:38,440 --> 01:32:39,395 Are you sure? 1673 01:32:40,080 --> 01:32:42,913 That "slut" becomes a love word. 1674 01:32:44,160 --> 01:32:46,754 I may try, if you want. 1675 01:32:58,120 --> 01:33:01,032 Anyway,I don't care about this slut! 1676 01:33:03,080 --> 01:33:04,149 Cut! 1677 01:33:05,320 --> 01:33:08,153 Who's the idiot that forgot to turn off his mobile? 1678 01:33:12,560 --> 01:33:13,754 I think it's me. 1679 01:33:14,640 --> 01:33:15,709 Then answer! 1680 01:33:26,000 --> 01:33:26,796 Yes... 1681 01:33:31,080 --> 01:33:32,229 Yes, but... 1682 01:33:33,600 --> 01:33:35,397 I'm shooting now. 1683 01:33:51,880 --> 01:33:53,074 It's my father. 1684 01:33:56,080 --> 01:33:57,798 My respects to him. 1685 01:34:01,560 --> 01:34:03,596 Hello, dad, yes? 1686 01:34:38,120 --> 01:34:40,793 He's with a friend who wants to talk to tou. 1687 01:34:43,840 --> 01:34:44,875 Hello. 1688 01:34:47,040 --> 01:34:48,792 How are you doing, dad? 1689 01:34:50,080 --> 01:34:50,956 Yes... 1690 01:34:52,880 --> 01:34:53,756 Yes... 1691 01:34:55,880 --> 01:34:57,518 Yes, of course... 1692 01:34:59,680 --> 01:35:02,274 Not bad. I'm just... 1693 01:35:02,600 --> 01:35:04,033 shooting a film. 1694 01:35:05,080 --> 01:35:07,469 What? I cannot hear... 1695 01:35:09,120 --> 01:35:10,872 It's a film... 1696 01:35:11,440 --> 01:35:12,873 about actors. 1697 01:35:15,240 --> 01:35:17,276 Of course I think of you... 1698 01:35:18,120 --> 01:35:19,951 I think of you every day. 1699 01:35:20,720 --> 01:35:22,756 I'll even tell you a secret... 1700 01:35:23,840 --> 01:35:26,195 The more days pass, the more I miss you. 115729