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1
00:00:03,297 --> 00:00:05,362
My fear isn’t
Irrational.
2
00:00:05,363 --> 00:00:07,263
Fear of fire is
Totally justified.
3
00:00:07,264 --> 00:00:08,956
Even one match can
Start an inferno.
4
00:00:08,957 --> 00:00:10,593
Hmm. It’s like my
Fear of poor people.
5
00:00:10,594 --> 00:00:12,593
Even one can start
A socialist uprising.
6
00:00:12,594 --> 00:00:14,263
You’d be the first
Against the wall.
7
00:00:14,264 --> 00:00:15,198
Yeah. Oh!
8
00:00:16,198 --> 00:00:18,362
Ooh, tired today.Here, finish mine.
Huh. Billing the
Most hours this year
9
00:00:18,363 --> 00:00:19,593
Almost killed me, but
It’ll be worth it.
10
00:00:19,594 --> 00:00:21,494
Oh, finally! Where
The hell were you?
11
00:00:21,495 --> 00:00:22,956
I had to get
My own latte.
12
00:00:22,957 --> 00:00:23,956
I picked up your
Dry cleaning
13
00:00:23,957 --> 00:00:25,527
And dropped it off
At your place,
14
00:00:25,528 --> 00:00:26,395
And did
Your dishes.
15
00:00:26,396 --> 00:00:28,032
Then I came here and
Tidied your office
16
00:00:28,033 --> 00:00:29,461
And spit-shined
Your pens.
17
00:00:29,462 --> 00:00:31,164
What the fuck
Happened to
Your face?
18
00:00:31,165 --> 00:00:32,428
Chicken pox, sir.
19
00:00:32,429 --> 00:00:33,461
Due to my home
Schooling,
20
00:00:33,462 --> 00:00:35,560
I was never exposed
To the virus.
21
00:00:36,363 --> 00:00:38,263
Or to the so-called
Theory of evolution.
22
00:00:38,264 --> 00:00:40,000
Chicken pox?
23
00:00:42,165 --> 00:00:44,725
My office is
Contaminated!
24
00:00:44,726 --> 00:00:46,791
This whole area
Is contaminated!
25
00:00:46,792 --> 00:00:47,692
You’re contaminated!
26
00:00:47,693 --> 00:00:50,395
I’ve never had
The chicken pox!
27
00:00:50,396 --> 00:00:51,428
Sanctuary!
28
00:00:55,132 --> 00:00:56,362
You dropped
Your coffee.
29
00:00:56,363 --> 00:00:58,098
One, two, three, four!
30
00:01:03,924 --> 00:01:05,230
♪ all hail
The working man ♪
31
00:01:05,231 --> 00:01:06,758
♪ he’s got the world
In his hand ♪
32
00:01:06,759 --> 00:01:08,197
♪ all hail
The working man ♪
33
00:01:08,198 --> 00:01:10,296
♪ the work is never done
34
00:01:10,297 --> 00:01:13,263
♪ way-oh, way-oh-oh
35
00:01:13,264 --> 00:01:15,956
♪ way-oh, way-oh-ho
36
00:01:15,957 --> 00:01:17,296
Huh!
37
00:01:17,297 --> 00:01:18,494
♪ I am the working man
38
00:01:18,495 --> 00:01:20,197
♪ through the night
Till the morning sun ♪
39
00:01:20,198 --> 00:01:21,593
♪ I am the working man
40
00:01:21,594 --> 00:01:23,362
♪ the work is never done
41
00:01:23,363 --> 00:01:26,527
♪ way-oh, way-oh-oh
Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!
42
00:01:26,528 --> 00:01:27,999
Hey! Hey!
♪ way-oh-way
43
00:01:28,957 --> 00:01:30,362
♪ pray for
The working man ♪
44
00:01:30,363 --> 00:01:31,923
♪ always there
With a helping hand ♪
45
00:01:31,924 --> 00:01:33,461
♪ pray for
The working man ♪
46
00:01:33,462 --> 00:01:34,890
♪ the work is never done
47
00:01:34,891 --> 00:01:36,395
♪ all hail
The working man ♪
48
00:01:36,396 --> 00:01:37,890
♪ another day
Has just begun ♪
49
00:01:37,891 --> 00:01:39,428
♪ all hail
The working man ♪
50
00:01:39,429 --> 00:01:41,693
♪ it’s never friggin’ done
51
00:01:44,924 --> 00:01:46,857
Psst! Robin.
52
00:01:47,891 --> 00:01:48,560
Why are you
Laughing?
53
00:01:48,561 --> 00:01:51,726
Uh, just a little
Tired, sir. Ahem.
54
00:01:54,099 --> 00:01:55,593
We have an announcement
To make.
55
00:01:55,594 --> 00:01:58,296
The lawyer who billed
The most hours
56
00:01:58,297 --> 00:02:02,065
Over the past year,
With 3331, is...
57
00:02:02,066 --> 00:02:03,758
Rockin’ robin howland.
58
00:02:05,066 --> 00:02:06,560
Guess I better start
Packing.
59
00:02:06,561 --> 00:02:09,000
However, first prize
Is no longer
60
00:02:10,825 --> 00:02:13,857
Two weeks in the
Cayman islands.What...?
It’s going to be an old-timey
Roast of robin!
61
00:02:13,858 --> 00:02:15,758
Like dino martin used to do.
62
00:02:17,891 --> 00:02:19,527
Okay, so let me get this
Straight.
63
00:02:19,528 --> 00:02:22,032
Instead of getting sun-
Tanned and cornrows,
64
00:02:22,033 --> 00:02:23,494
We’re going to make fun
Of you.
65
00:02:23,495 --> 00:02:25,659
Wow. Well, how do you feel
About that?
66
00:02:25,660 --> 00:02:28,131
I think it fucking sucks.
67
00:02:28,132 --> 00:02:30,329
Save the jokes for the roast.
68
00:02:34,000 --> 00:02:36,230
So you got a brazilian
For nothing.
69
00:02:36,231 --> 00:02:37,428
Sucks to be bald.
70
00:02:37,429 --> 00:02:38,560
Well, all the hours
I’ve billed
71
00:02:38,561 --> 00:02:40,362
Have definitely put me on
Partner track.
72
00:02:40,363 --> 00:02:41,923
I’ll just put up with this
Roast bullshit.
73
00:02:41,924 --> 00:02:43,560
I think you’re
Forgetting your skin
74
00:02:43,561 --> 00:02:44,956
Is thinner than
A burn victim’s.
75
00:02:44,957 --> 00:02:46,725
This roast is going
To destroy you.
76
00:02:46,726 --> 00:02:48,999
Uh, I spent the second half
Of that meeting
77
00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:50,594
Coming up with
Good retorts.
78
00:02:51,594 --> 00:02:54,395
Oh, yeah, that
Makes sense.You are a little
Retorted.
Oh shit, that’s
Better than
My material.
79
00:02:54,396 --> 00:02:56,792
All I have are six
Knock-knock jokes.
80
00:02:57,165 --> 00:02:58,890
Who’s there?
81
00:02:58,891 --> 00:02:59,758
Sam and robin.
82
00:02:59,759 --> 00:03:00,824
Sam and robin who?
83
00:03:00,825 --> 00:03:01,923
Oh, come on,
Just let us in!
84
00:03:01,924 --> 00:03:03,857
All right, only
If you suit up.
85
00:03:03,858 --> 00:03:07,132
I’ve already cut
Out the neck holes.
86
00:03:11,198 --> 00:03:12,692
This reminds me
Of halloween.
87
00:03:12,693 --> 00:03:14,824
My mom said I was
A california raisin,
88
00:03:14,825 --> 00:03:17,230
But all the other
Kids said it’s
Just a garbage bag
89
00:03:17,231 --> 00:03:19,264
And that I’m poor.
Mmm.
90
00:03:30,924 --> 00:03:32,461
Clean? Any spots?
91
00:03:32,462 --> 00:03:34,527
Close the door!
92
00:03:34,528 --> 00:03:35,858
Here.
93
00:03:37,660 --> 00:03:40,791
Whew...How could
You possibly
Avoid getting
The chicken pox
For 32 years?
94
00:03:40,792 --> 00:03:42,659
Well, I’m sorry,
Unlike some people,
95
00:03:42,660 --> 00:03:44,197
I wasn’t born in
The fucking gutter
96
00:03:44,198 --> 00:03:45,659
With rats crawling
All over me.
97
00:03:45,660 --> 00:03:48,527
Uh, chicken pox
Is not a poor
Person’s disease.
98
00:03:48,528 --> 00:03:50,824
Uh-huh... Hey,
Don’t touch!
99
00:03:50,825 --> 00:03:52,032
Put down
That...
100
00:03:52,033 --> 00:03:52,857
Well, what
Are they,
101
00:03:52,858 --> 00:03:54,857
And why do they
Have... Times
Written on them?
102
00:03:54,858 --> 00:03:58,197
I’m studying my fluids
For signs of disease.
103
00:03:58,198 --> 00:03:58,824
Ugh...
104
00:03:58,825 --> 00:03:59,923
Well, how many
Are there?
105
00:03:59,924 --> 00:04:01,263
You’ve only been
In here for an hour.
106
00:04:01,264 --> 00:04:03,692
Well, I had a lot
Of coffee to drink
This morning,
107
00:04:03,693 --> 00:04:05,329
Then I had to empty
The bottles to piss in.
108
00:04:05,330 --> 00:04:07,395
You know, it’s a...
Just a vicious cycle.
109
00:04:07,396 --> 00:04:08,362
Okay, clark...
Vicious.
110
00:04:08,363 --> 00:04:10,131
Clark,
Listen to me.
111
00:04:10,132 --> 00:04:11,098
Listen to me!
112
00:04:11,099 --> 00:04:12,032
You’ve got
To go home.
113
00:04:12,033 --> 00:04:14,296
Go home, watch
"Days of our lives",
114
00:04:14,297 --> 00:04:16,329
Masturbate when
Your mom goes
To the store...
115
00:04:16,330 --> 00:04:17,791
I can’t! I
Can’t get...
116
00:04:17,792 --> 00:04:19,527
Look, every inch
Of this firm
117
00:04:19,528 --> 00:04:22,164
Is infected by
That fucker, millie.
118
00:04:22,165 --> 00:04:24,956
Ew.
So how long is
Your quarantine?
119
00:04:24,957 --> 00:04:25,857
Too soon to say.
120
00:04:25,858 --> 00:04:28,461
I have to wait for
The test results.
121
00:04:35,099 --> 00:04:37,824
This is kind
Of exciting.
122
00:04:37,825 --> 00:04:38,956
Look at all
These people here,
123
00:04:38,957 --> 00:04:40,395
Just for me.
124
00:04:40,396 --> 00:04:41,758
What are you
Doing back here?
125
00:04:41,759 --> 00:04:43,626
The brass get
A whiff of
Your jokes?
126
00:04:43,627 --> 00:04:45,395
I’m not ragging
On robin publicly.
127
00:04:45,396 --> 00:04:48,197
She holds a grudge
Like the chick
From "The grudge".
128
00:04:51,264 --> 00:04:53,428
Welcome,
Ladies and germs.
129
00:04:55,099 --> 00:04:58,032
What can we say
About a woman
130
00:04:58,033 --> 00:05:00,462
Who is loved
By everyone?
131
00:05:01,165 --> 00:05:03,999
We can say she’s
Not the woman
132
00:05:04,000 --> 00:05:05,824
We’re roasting
Here tonight.
133
00:05:07,693 --> 00:05:10,395
Let’s get this show
On the road, already.
134
00:05:10,396 --> 00:05:11,098
Maxine!
135
00:05:11,099 --> 00:05:12,296
Take it to
The house.
136
00:05:17,330 --> 00:05:17,924
Ah...
137
00:05:21,957 --> 00:05:25,395
You know, robin
Doesn’t put on airs.With all she eats,
She has enough
Trouble just putting
On her pants!
138
00:05:27,660 --> 00:05:31,065
Robin’s the most colourful
Personality I know.
139
00:05:31,066 --> 00:05:33,857
She’s usually
Green with envy,
140
00:05:33,858 --> 00:05:36,626
And has a yellow
Streak down her back.
141
00:05:41,066 --> 00:05:42,329
Why’s everyone
Laughing?
142
00:05:42,330 --> 00:05:43,131
That joke sucked.
143
00:05:43,132 --> 00:05:46,890
She’s saying you’re
A jealous coward!
144
00:05:48,825 --> 00:05:52,230
Now, it’s time to hear
From clark claxton!
145
00:05:52,231 --> 00:05:54,891
Whoo-hoo!
146
00:05:59,462 --> 00:06:01,065
Go ahead, bubble boy.
147
00:06:01,066 --> 00:06:03,626
All right. Great to
Be here, everyone.
148
00:06:03,627 --> 00:06:06,164
Robin howland,
Look at that face.
149
00:06:06,165 --> 00:06:07,999
Vic, point at
Robin’s face.
150
00:06:08,000 --> 00:06:09,593
I’m doing it now.
151
00:06:09,594 --> 00:06:10,362
Yeah.
152
00:06:10,363 --> 00:06:12,593
Look at that face,
Just amazing.
153
00:06:12,594 --> 00:06:15,627
I’ve seen happier faces
On milk cartons.
154
00:06:15,957 --> 00:06:18,527
I’ve seen prettier faces
On mount rushmore.
155
00:06:19,627 --> 00:06:22,999
Yeah. She’s got the eyes
Of a giant squid.
156
00:06:23,000 --> 00:06:24,329
Oh, and the arms too.
157
00:06:24,330 --> 00:06:25,957
Show us, vic.
158
00:06:26,396 --> 00:06:28,660
She’s always doing that...
159
00:06:29,066 --> 00:06:31,362
Seriously, seriously,
She’s a total idiot.
160
00:06:31,363 --> 00:06:32,593
Total idiot. Wow.
161
00:06:32,594 --> 00:06:34,560
Someone punch her
In the neck for me.
162
00:06:34,561 --> 00:06:35,999
Robin’s a loser!
163
00:06:36,000 --> 00:06:37,296
Good night, everybody.
164
00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:40,296
That wasn’t
Even a joke!
165
00:06:46,825 --> 00:06:49,627
Robin...
166
00:06:59,759 --> 00:07:02,626
I took a whiff of
Robin’s box once,
167
00:07:02,627 --> 00:07:05,428
And it smells worse
Than my mom’s freezer!
168
00:07:06,033 --> 00:07:09,725
And it’s about
The same size too!
169
00:07:09,726 --> 00:07:10,659
And temperature!
170
00:07:10,660 --> 00:07:13,461
And it probably has
The same warranty.
171
00:07:13,462 --> 00:07:14,824
Which is expired!
172
00:07:17,462 --> 00:07:18,890
Oh, seriously,
Folks,
173
00:07:18,891 --> 00:07:22,263
Robin’s always
Said that I’m a
Cunning linguist!
174
00:07:25,396 --> 00:07:27,428
I’m just
Kidding...
Don’t touch me!
175
00:07:27,429 --> 00:07:28,428
Just kidding.
176
00:07:30,231 --> 00:07:33,726
Oh, oh, oh!
177
00:07:34,957 --> 00:07:37,890
Now, as is
Roast tradition,
178
00:07:37,891 --> 00:07:42,263
She who has received
Shall give.
179
00:07:42,264 --> 00:07:44,824
I welcome
Fagen & harrison’s
180
00:07:44,825 --> 00:07:48,527
Lawyer of the year,
Robin howland!
181
00:07:55,033 --> 00:07:58,725
Thank you all for
Honouring me tonight.
182
00:07:58,726 --> 00:08:00,065
It means a lot
183
00:08:00,066 --> 00:08:02,329
To have you all here...
184
00:08:02,330 --> 00:08:03,659
Laughing at me...
185
00:08:03,660 --> 00:08:05,924
Making fun of me...
186
00:08:07,561 --> 00:08:08,362
Knock, knock.
187
00:08:08,363 --> 00:08:09,857
Who’s there?
188
00:08:09,858 --> 00:08:10,956
Who is it?
189
00:08:10,957 --> 00:08:12,362
Fuck you!
190
00:08:12,363 --> 00:08:13,956
Fuck you,
That’s who!
191
00:08:13,957 --> 00:08:15,329
Huh? You think
You’re funny?
192
00:08:15,330 --> 00:08:17,560
You think you’re all
So fucking hilarious?
193
00:08:17,561 --> 00:08:19,758
Well, guess again,
Cocksuckers!
194
00:08:19,759 --> 00:08:21,330
Okay...
195
00:08:25,627 --> 00:08:27,890
Let’s get started with
My "Bestest fwiends",sam and clark,
The bert and ernie
Of fagen & harrison.
196
00:08:27,891 --> 00:08:31,065
Another pair of
Puppets passing
As straight guys.
197
00:08:31,066 --> 00:08:33,791
And hey, mr. Fagen,
You senile jackass,
198
00:08:33,792 --> 00:08:36,593
You’re so old, you
Shit dinosaur bones!
199
00:08:36,594 --> 00:08:37,263
And maxine,
200
00:08:37,264 --> 00:08:40,197
I’ve seen younger faces
On rotting corpses.
201
00:08:41,462 --> 00:08:43,032
Maxine and I
Were at the gym the
Other day, changing,
202
00:08:43,033 --> 00:08:45,956
And her tits looked
Like tube socks
Full of nickels!
203
00:08:45,957 --> 00:08:47,692
Don’t even try it,
Mr. Kaplan,
204
00:08:47,693 --> 00:08:48,956
I’m just
Getting started!
205
00:08:48,957 --> 00:08:50,065
Huh, you have
Fun last night
206
00:08:50,066 --> 00:08:51,527
At the bathhouse,
You old queer? Huh?
207
00:08:51,528 --> 00:08:53,593
Sucking cocks
Like lollipops?
208
00:08:55,297 --> 00:08:57,824
That fraud in
Accounting... Fuck you!
209
00:08:57,825 --> 00:08:59,494
You fucker, you
Think you’re smart?
210
00:08:59,495 --> 00:09:01,362
Huh, you think
You’re smart?
211
00:09:01,363 --> 00:09:03,264
You’re just
A fucking asshole!
212
00:09:08,627 --> 00:09:10,725
Hey!
Oh, I feel like a pig
Shat on my brain.
213
00:09:10,726 --> 00:09:13,065
I was up all
Night practising
Being remorseful.
214
00:09:13,066 --> 00:09:14,890
Because of your
Little tirade
At the roast?
215
00:09:14,891 --> 00:09:17,296
No, because
I’m wearing a
Poly-cotton blend
216
00:09:17,297 --> 00:09:18,362
And pretending
It’s cashmere.
217
00:09:18,363 --> 00:09:19,692
Of course
Because of
The roast!
218
00:09:19,693 --> 00:09:21,263
Mr. Kaplan.
Robin!
219
00:09:21,264 --> 00:09:23,329
How are you this
Lovely morning?
220
00:09:23,330 --> 00:09:25,857
I’m, uh...
221
00:09:25,858 --> 00:09:26,890
I’m well, sir.
222
00:09:26,891 --> 00:09:29,198
Well, you have yourself
A great day!
223
00:09:30,363 --> 00:09:31,527
Well, I wasn’t
Expecting that.
224
00:09:31,528 --> 00:09:33,593
Hi, robin! Here’s
Your coffee.
225
00:09:33,594 --> 00:09:34,923
Did you
Spit in it?
226
00:09:34,924 --> 00:09:36,725
Oh, ha, ha, ha,
You are funny!
227
00:09:36,726 --> 00:09:38,098
And so pretty too.
228
00:09:38,099 --> 00:09:39,626
I wish I had
Your hair.
229
00:09:39,627 --> 00:09:42,197
You have yourself
The best day!
230
00:09:42,198 --> 00:09:44,626
Okay, everyone’s
Being nice, sam.
231
00:09:44,627 --> 00:09:45,725
What’s going on?
232
00:09:45,726 --> 00:09:46,626
I fixed it.
233
00:09:46,627 --> 00:09:47,560
How’d you
Do that?
234
00:09:47,561 --> 00:09:48,956
I told everyone you
Went off your meds
235
00:09:48,957 --> 00:09:50,329
And you had a
Psychotic episode.
236
00:09:50,330 --> 00:09:51,197
What’d you
Do that for?
237
00:09:51,198 --> 00:09:52,296
If everyone
Thinks I’m insane,
238
00:09:52,297 --> 00:09:53,230
I’ll never
Make partner!
239
00:09:53,231 --> 00:09:54,659
Oh, I never
Thought of that.
240
00:09:54,660 --> 00:09:55,890
Well, at least
If they fire you,
241
00:09:55,891 --> 00:09:57,131
You can sue for
Wrongful dismissal.
242
00:09:57,132 --> 00:09:59,825
Okay, I have
To fix this now.
243
00:10:00,132 --> 00:10:02,296
Maybe I should have
Told them her mom died.
244
00:10:08,627 --> 00:10:09,890
What do you want?
245
00:10:09,891 --> 00:10:13,956
Clark asked me
For a copy of
Sexy "Tetris".
246
00:10:13,957 --> 00:10:15,395
Hey. Pass it in.
247
00:10:15,396 --> 00:10:16,923
Ooh, chicken.
248
00:10:16,924 --> 00:10:18,329
What? What is it?
249
00:10:18,330 --> 00:10:20,956
Nothing. You
Just have a
Lot of stubble.
250
00:10:20,957 --> 00:10:22,494
Nose hairs.
251
00:10:22,495 --> 00:10:24,560
Well, a couple
More days in here
252
00:10:24,561 --> 00:10:26,032
And I’ll be
In the clear.
253
00:10:26,033 --> 00:10:27,230
The only
Downside is I’m...
254
00:10:27,231 --> 00:10:29,296
I’m missing my
Daily fix of courtney
255
00:10:29,297 --> 00:10:31,231
In her slutty
Outfits.
256
00:10:32,231 --> 00:10:34,659
That is one mean case
Of chicken pox.
257
00:10:34,660 --> 00:10:37,131
You stay here.
Don’t let clark
Out of the office.
258
00:10:37,132 --> 00:10:39,593
He’s got "Sextris",
Where’s he going to go?
259
00:10:39,594 --> 00:10:42,362
Clark has
The chicken pox!
260
00:10:42,363 --> 00:10:44,098
Clark has the
Chicken pox!
261
00:10:44,099 --> 00:10:46,000
Clark has
The chicken pox!
262
00:10:49,891 --> 00:10:51,428
Ooh... Ugh!
263
00:10:51,429 --> 00:10:52,527
Get out of here!
264
00:10:52,528 --> 00:10:53,692
Leave me alone! Aah!
265
00:10:53,693 --> 00:10:57,263
Sam says robin’s
Got some serious
Mental problems.
266
00:10:57,264 --> 00:10:59,791
Yeah? Maybe we
Should take her
To the casino
267
00:10:59,792 --> 00:11:01,131
To have her
Count cards.
268
00:11:01,132 --> 00:11:03,395
She’s nuts,
Not autistic.
269
00:11:05,858 --> 00:11:07,231
Oh...
270
00:11:07,825 --> 00:11:08,593
The swatting?
271
00:11:08,594 --> 00:11:11,461
Oh! Oh, that? No...
I’m not crazy!
272
00:11:11,462 --> 00:11:13,362
Honest. It’s...
It’s the flies.
273
00:11:13,363 --> 00:11:15,032
The flies are
Everywhere!
274
00:11:15,033 --> 00:11:18,725
Someone keeps
Leaving fruit
In my office!
275
00:11:18,726 --> 00:11:21,461
Stupid bananas.
Stupid bananas!
276
00:11:21,462 --> 00:11:22,791
Hey, robin.
277
00:11:22,792 --> 00:11:24,593
Indoor voice, please.
278
00:11:24,594 --> 00:11:26,999
For instance, if
We were outside
I would’ve said...
279
00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:28,231
"Hey, robin!"
280
00:11:29,726 --> 00:11:32,923
But we’re inside,
So I said,
"Hey, robin."
Okay, mr. Kaplan, I-I
Want to talk to you.
281
00:11:32,924 --> 00:11:35,329
Sam was just
Joking around when
He said I was crazy.
282
00:11:35,330 --> 00:11:37,593
I’m not crazy.
I’m far from crazy.
283
00:11:37,594 --> 00:11:39,296
I’m so sane,
It’s almost crazy.
284
00:11:39,297 --> 00:11:40,626
All right,
Whatever you say.
285
00:11:40,627 --> 00:11:42,395
Why are you talking
To me that way?
286
00:11:42,396 --> 00:11:44,098
That’s how I talk
To my uncle jimmy.
287
00:11:44,099 --> 00:11:46,593
Now, he’s crazy. He’s
In an institution.
288
00:11:46,594 --> 00:11:47,758
Maybe it’s genetic.
289
00:11:47,759 --> 00:11:49,032
He’s my mom’s
Boyfriend,
290
00:11:49,033 --> 00:11:50,264
He just asked me
To call him uncle.
291
00:11:52,594 --> 00:11:56,330
Point is,
I’m not crazy!Sure, sure.
Oh, I-I think I hear
Your phone ringing.
292
00:11:57,165 --> 00:11:58,857
I... I don’t
Hear anything.
293
00:11:58,858 --> 00:12:01,231
That’s good!
See, you’re
Making progress.
294
00:12:13,231 --> 00:12:15,329
Okay, kids,
Go, go, go, go,
Go, go, go, go!Get in there,
Gerald.
Make dad proud!
What the hell?
295
00:12:15,330 --> 00:12:17,065
Get out of here!
No chance, doll.
296
00:12:17,066 --> 00:12:18,329
We’re throwing
A chicken pox party
297
00:12:18,330 --> 00:12:20,263
And you’re the
Guest of honour.
298
00:12:20,264 --> 00:12:21,362
A chicken pox what?
Party!
299
00:12:21,363 --> 00:12:23,329
These kids need
To get chicken pox
300
00:12:23,330 --> 00:12:24,659
And get it over
With it already.
301
00:12:24,660 --> 00:12:26,890
You’re not getting
Out till they
Get infected.
302
00:12:26,891 --> 00:12:27,428
I have chicken pox?
303
00:12:27,429 --> 00:12:30,032
I thought it was
A reaction to
Drinking my own pee!
304
00:12:30,033 --> 00:12:32,395
Keep a guard on this
Door at all times.
305
00:12:32,396 --> 00:12:33,593
But, I can’t...
306
00:12:34,561 --> 00:12:36,494
Ah! My sores!
307
00:12:36,495 --> 00:12:38,164
If he tries to
Escape, mace him!
308
00:12:38,165 --> 00:12:40,824
Who needs mace when
I got these guns.
309
00:12:40,825 --> 00:12:43,198
Mwah, mwah.
310
00:12:45,792 --> 00:12:46,824
Ah-h!
311
00:12:46,825 --> 00:12:48,560
Goddamn it!
312
00:12:48,561 --> 00:12:52,791
Ugh, they’re like a
Pack of rabid lemurs.
313
00:12:57,495 --> 00:12:58,999
Whose kid are you?
314
00:12:59,000 --> 00:12:59,593
My mom’s.
315
00:12:59,594 --> 00:13:01,999
Yeah, I know
That, dummy.
What’s her name?
316
00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:03,461
Lauren chambers.
317
00:13:03,462 --> 00:13:06,198
Ugh. You must
Be adopted.
318
00:13:06,759 --> 00:13:07,857
I’m adopted?
319
00:13:07,858 --> 00:13:09,791
Yeah.
320
00:13:09,792 --> 00:13:10,329
Stop it!
321
00:13:12,132 --> 00:13:13,032
Stop it!
322
00:13:23,495 --> 00:13:26,890
This apple juice is
Warm, uncle clark.
323
00:13:31,825 --> 00:13:34,494
I finished my nap,
Uncle clark.
324
00:13:34,495 --> 00:13:37,494
All right,
I’m coming.
325
00:13:37,495 --> 00:13:38,858
I’m coming.
326
00:13:39,495 --> 00:13:41,792
There we go.
327
00:13:42,627 --> 00:13:44,263
Good job.
328
00:13:44,264 --> 00:13:46,164
What do we do
Now, uncle clark?
329
00:13:46,165 --> 00:13:49,396
I don’t know,
Hop on your foot
Or something.
330
00:13:51,132 --> 00:13:52,659
Stop, stop, stop.
331
00:13:52,660 --> 00:13:54,395
What do we do now,
Uncle clark?
332
00:13:54,396 --> 00:13:57,297
Uh, pat your head,
Rub your belly.
333
00:13:57,528 --> 00:14:01,758
Stop. What, are
You going to do
Everything I say?
334
00:14:01,759 --> 00:14:03,033
Yeah?
335
00:14:03,561 --> 00:14:04,923
They’ll obey any
Order I give ’em,
336
00:14:04,924 --> 00:14:07,560
Like a little
Child army.
337
00:14:07,561 --> 00:14:09,164
My child army.
338
00:14:09,165 --> 00:14:10,230
Children!
339
00:14:10,231 --> 00:14:12,362
Scratch my pox!
340
00:14:12,363 --> 00:14:13,758
Ah...
341
00:14:13,759 --> 00:14:15,230
Oh, that’s
The stuff!
342
00:14:15,231 --> 00:14:16,428
Nice. Now get away,
That’s enough.
343
00:14:16,429 --> 00:14:17,824
Now, get out,
Get out of here.
344
00:14:17,825 --> 00:14:19,956
Now, what do
We do next?
345
00:14:19,957 --> 00:14:22,999
Um, what do you
Kids know about
Digging tunnels?
346
00:14:24,132 --> 00:14:25,428
As the contract
Currently stands,
347
00:14:25,429 --> 00:14:27,560
The client would be
Crazy to sign it.
348
00:14:27,561 --> 00:14:28,593
No offence, robin.
349
00:14:28,594 --> 00:14:30,164
Sir, I’m not crazy.
350
00:14:30,165 --> 00:14:32,230
Oh, robin, he’s not
Calling you crazy.
351
00:14:32,231 --> 00:14:34,461
He’s just saying
No offence
Should be taken
352
00:14:34,462 --> 00:14:35,659
When none
Was intended.
353
00:14:35,660 --> 00:14:36,758
Exactamundo!
354
00:14:36,759 --> 00:14:37,758
Ah...
355
00:14:37,759 --> 00:14:38,692
Huh...
356
00:14:38,693 --> 00:14:39,461
What are you doing?
357
00:14:39,462 --> 00:14:41,626
Nothing. I wasn’t
Doing anything.
358
00:14:41,627 --> 00:14:43,395
Was I doing anything?
359
00:14:43,396 --> 00:14:44,560
Okay, I know
What that means.
360
00:14:44,561 --> 00:14:46,659
It’s the universal
Sign for crazy.
361
00:14:46,660 --> 00:14:48,263
Oh, sweetie,
Not in bangkok.
362
00:14:48,264 --> 00:14:50,428
In bangkok, it means,
"Cheque, please"!
363
00:14:50,429 --> 00:14:52,098
You little bastard...
364
00:14:52,099 --> 00:14:55,461
Boy, crazy people
Can be so sensitive.
365
00:14:55,462 --> 00:14:56,395
I’m not crazy!
366
00:14:56,396 --> 00:14:58,164
Okay, I’m
Not crazy.
367
00:14:58,165 --> 00:14:58,857
What are
You doing?
368
00:14:58,858 --> 00:15:01,494
God, I’m not crazy!
369
00:15:01,495 --> 00:15:03,494
I’m not crazy!
370
00:15:03,495 --> 00:15:06,032
Time to call the boys
With the butterfly nets.
371
00:15:08,693 --> 00:15:10,560
Private nicolette,
Your squad’s mission
372
00:15:10,561 --> 00:15:12,230
Is to acquire me
Calamine lotion,
373
00:15:12,231 --> 00:15:13,527
Cigars, and a good
Bottle of scotch.
374
00:15:13,528 --> 00:15:16,395
Best place to look
Is mr. Fagen’s office.
375
00:15:16,396 --> 00:15:17,725
Yes, sir.
Single malt?
376
00:15:17,726 --> 00:15:22,065
The fact that you’re
Asking me that question
Concerns me, private,
377
00:15:22,066 --> 00:15:24,363
But yes. Now
Move, soldier.
378
00:15:25,330 --> 00:15:26,395
Private levon.
379
00:15:26,396 --> 00:15:27,461
This is usually
The time of day
380
00:15:27,462 --> 00:15:28,659
I cruise over
To accounting
381
00:15:28,660 --> 00:15:30,999
To check out courtney’s
Considerable assets,
382
00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:32,263
If you know
What I mean.
383
00:15:32,264 --> 00:15:34,758
Take this camera and
Be my eyes, soldier.
384
00:15:34,759 --> 00:15:36,791
Your country’s
Counting on you.
385
00:15:36,792 --> 00:15:38,999
Yes, sir.
Now move.
386
00:15:39,000 --> 00:15:39,857
Ha-ha.
387
00:15:39,858 --> 00:15:40,923
Oh, and, uh...
388
00:15:40,924 --> 00:15:44,197
None of that soft-
Focus arty shit!
389
00:15:44,198 --> 00:15:45,923
Okay, sam, tell
Them I’m not crazy.
390
00:15:45,924 --> 00:15:47,098
Tell them you
Made it up.
391
00:15:47,099 --> 00:15:48,824
Yeah, it’s all
Sam’s fault.
392
00:15:48,825 --> 00:15:50,131
But... Sam!
393
00:15:50,132 --> 00:15:50,890
Sam, this isn’t funny.
394
00:15:50,891 --> 00:15:52,758
I’ll visit!
I promise.
Sam, sam!
395
00:15:52,759 --> 00:15:54,626
Sam, you’re
A dead man!
396
00:15:54,627 --> 00:15:55,857
Sam, you
Fucking bastard!
397
00:15:55,858 --> 00:15:58,065
I’ll rip your lying
Tongue out and
Feed it to pigs!
398
00:15:58,066 --> 00:16:00,296
You know, I really
Thought they’d have
Butterfly nets.
399
00:16:00,297 --> 00:16:02,726
Yeah, I’m a little
Disappointed myself.
400
00:16:09,132 --> 00:16:10,890
Oh, stupid banana.
401
00:16:10,891 --> 00:16:11,999
Oh, hey, robin!
402
00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:13,494
So how’d you escape
The nut house?
403
00:16:13,495 --> 00:16:14,659
Tie your bed
Sheets together?
404
00:16:14,660 --> 00:16:16,098
Ah, the doctor
Quickly surmised
405
00:16:16,099 --> 00:16:17,659
That I’m not
Fucking crazy!
406
00:16:17,660 --> 00:16:19,098
Yeah, sure, I’ve
Got trust issues,
407
00:16:19,099 --> 00:16:21,329
But maybe that’s
Because a close
Friend of mine
408
00:16:21,330 --> 00:16:23,131
Committed me to a
Mental institution.
409
00:16:23,132 --> 00:16:24,857
Hey, I was
The only one who
Visited, wasn’t I?
410
00:16:24,858 --> 00:16:26,362
I’ve got to
Go find kaplan
411
00:16:26,363 --> 00:16:27,857
And try and
Salvage my career.
412
00:16:27,858 --> 00:16:28,560
Well, don’t
Sleep with him.
413
00:16:28,561 --> 00:16:30,494
It won’t do anything
For your crazy rep.
414
00:16:30,495 --> 00:16:32,890
Won’t do anything for
Your slutty rep either.
415
00:16:34,264 --> 00:16:37,098
Where’s my
Glacier water?
416
00:16:37,099 --> 00:16:38,923
Oh, there it is.
417
00:16:38,924 --> 00:16:41,230
Well done. Soldiers?
418
00:16:41,231 --> 00:16:41,956
Well done.
419
00:16:41,957 --> 00:16:45,230
Soon the entire
Floor will be ours.
420
00:16:45,231 --> 00:16:45,824
Ha-ha.
421
00:16:45,825 --> 00:16:48,561
Ah. Where’s my
Calamine lotion?
422
00:16:48,660 --> 00:16:50,659
All I could find was
Cream cheese, sir.
423
00:16:50,660 --> 00:16:52,164
Ah, well,
That’ll do.
424
00:16:52,165 --> 00:16:54,197
Mm, double whipped.
425
00:16:56,165 --> 00:16:58,923
Ah, sweet relief!
426
00:16:58,924 --> 00:17:01,098
Wait, wait,
Where’s levon?
427
00:17:01,099 --> 00:17:03,098
He hasn’t come
Back yet, sir.
428
00:17:03,099 --> 00:17:04,791
It’s been
Over an hour!
429
00:17:04,792 --> 00:17:07,494
Soldiers, we
Don’t rest until
We find him.
430
00:17:07,495 --> 00:17:10,462
No child left behind!
Not on my watch!
431
00:17:11,033 --> 00:17:12,428
Where’s my watch?
432
00:17:12,429 --> 00:17:14,428
Gerald...
433
00:17:14,429 --> 00:17:15,726
Hmm-hmm.
434
00:17:22,033 --> 00:17:22,858
All right!
Oh!
435
00:17:23,891 --> 00:17:28,131
Please,
Don’t hurt me.I-I’m too
Pretty to hurt.
Mr. Kaplan, this
Little piece of paper
436
00:17:28,132 --> 00:17:32,000
Certifies that
I am not crazy.
437
00:17:32,165 --> 00:17:33,659
You just might
Be crazy enough
438
00:17:33,660 --> 00:17:35,197
To have stolen
Something like this
439
00:17:35,198 --> 00:17:36,263
From a sane person.
440
00:17:36,264 --> 00:17:39,230
A sane person
Wouldn’t have
Proof of...
441
00:17:39,231 --> 00:17:40,923
Let me
Rephrase that.
442
00:17:40,924 --> 00:17:43,230
I insist you put me
Back on partner track.
443
00:17:43,231 --> 00:17:44,527
We never took you
Off partner track.
444
00:17:44,528 --> 00:17:46,923
Well, sure, that’s
What you told
"Crazy robin",
445
00:17:46,924 --> 00:17:48,560
But now you’re
Talking to the robin
446
00:17:48,561 --> 00:17:50,627
Who is
Certifiably sane.
447
00:17:52,000 --> 00:17:53,164
Did you just
See that?
448
00:17:53,165 --> 00:17:53,824
See what?
449
00:17:53,825 --> 00:17:57,692
The... Tiny little
Hand, the...
450
00:17:57,693 --> 00:18:00,792
Huh... I give up.
451
00:18:02,033 --> 00:18:02,956
I’m nuts.
452
00:18:02,957 --> 00:18:05,461
I am a loopy
Fruit loop.
453
00:18:05,462 --> 00:18:06,858
I’m crazy.
454
00:18:07,165 --> 00:18:08,758
A little crazy
Never hurt anybody.
455
00:18:08,759 --> 00:18:12,791
If mental illness
Got in the way
Of being partner,
456
00:18:12,792 --> 00:18:14,956
Then there’d be
No one at the helm.
457
00:18:14,957 --> 00:18:15,923
What do you mean?
458
00:18:15,924 --> 00:18:17,999
Come on,
Follow me.
459
00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:18,692
The last time
You said that,
460
00:18:18,693 --> 00:18:21,197
I ended up getting
Electroshock therapy.
461
00:18:21,198 --> 00:18:22,528
Come on.
462
00:18:25,726 --> 00:18:28,296
Oh, levon! There
You are, soldier.
463
00:18:28,297 --> 00:18:30,098
You okay?
You all right?
464
00:18:30,099 --> 00:18:31,560
Ah. Ha-hah!
465
00:18:31,561 --> 00:18:33,560
Oh, you magnificent
Bastard.
466
00:18:33,561 --> 00:18:35,065
Let’s see what
We got here.
467
00:18:35,066 --> 00:18:37,527
Oh, you got right
Under her desk.
468
00:18:37,528 --> 00:18:38,494
Cotton, huh?
469
00:18:38,495 --> 00:18:40,725
I also got pictures
Of bums, sir.
470
00:18:40,726 --> 00:18:41,461
I can see that.
471
00:18:41,462 --> 00:18:44,032
Oh! And robin
Got a brazilian.
472
00:18:46,396 --> 00:18:48,923
I’m so proud of you!
473
00:18:48,924 --> 00:18:51,264
Soldiers,
Attention!
474
00:18:52,792 --> 00:18:55,824
Now...
475
00:18:55,825 --> 00:18:57,561
Who’s got a light?
476
00:18:57,891 --> 00:18:59,890
Are you sure this
Is going to work?
477
00:18:59,891 --> 00:19:02,527
One way to find
Out. Come on!
478
00:19:02,528 --> 00:19:04,461
We call this
"Crazy exhibit a".
479
00:19:04,462 --> 00:19:05,494
At least this time,
480
00:19:05,495 --> 00:19:07,923
We won’t be finding
Dead rabbits
Lying around.
481
00:19:09,396 --> 00:19:13,923
Oh, what sights you’ve
Seen, my children.
482
00:19:13,924 --> 00:19:16,197
And what fine treasures
You’ve brought me.
483
00:19:16,198 --> 00:19:19,131
But now... Now
Is the time we
Look outward,
484
00:19:19,132 --> 00:19:23,131
As alexander did
When he sized up
The persian empire.
485
00:19:23,132 --> 00:19:25,461
Now is the time
To conquer!
486
00:19:25,462 --> 00:19:28,626
Ye-e-eah!
487
00:19:28,627 --> 00:19:29,890
All right,
Come on, kids,
488
00:19:29,891 --> 00:19:31,164
Playtime’s over.
Let’s go.
489
00:19:32,528 --> 00:19:33,725
What the fuck?
No, no, no, no!
490
00:19:33,726 --> 00:19:35,725
We were just about
To take over the
I.T. Department!
491
00:19:35,726 --> 00:19:39,429
If you control the media,
You control the nation!
492
00:19:40,429 --> 00:19:42,197
Fine, take ’em.
493
00:19:42,198 --> 00:19:44,923
Be glad to get rid
Of them, anyway.
494
00:19:54,957 --> 00:19:56,890
Soldiers!
495
00:19:56,891 --> 00:19:57,692
I, uh...
496
00:19:57,693 --> 00:19:59,725
I just wanted you to
Know, before you leave,
497
00:19:59,726 --> 00:20:02,065
That... You served
Your uncle clark
498
00:20:02,066 --> 00:20:04,098
With valour
And honour today.
499
00:20:04,099 --> 00:20:06,131
Men, you’re dismissed.
500
00:20:06,132 --> 00:20:09,824
Now, uh...
Give me a hug.
501
00:20:09,825 --> 00:20:10,560
Yeah. Yeah.
502
00:20:10,561 --> 00:20:13,428
Okay, that’s enough!
That’s enough.
That’s enough.
503
00:20:13,429 --> 00:20:15,792
Ah, ha-ha...
504
00:20:17,033 --> 00:20:18,692
I’ve taught you
Well, gerald.
Now get out of here,
Get out of here.
505
00:20:18,693 --> 00:20:21,890
You’re like
The artful dodger
To my fagin.
506
00:20:21,891 --> 00:20:24,131
Yeah! I’m fagin!
507
00:20:24,132 --> 00:20:27,198
I’m fagi-I-in!
508
00:20:28,561 --> 00:20:29,494
See?
509
00:20:29,495 --> 00:20:30,560
Claxton’s fucking
Crazy too.
510
00:20:30,561 --> 00:20:33,660
Oh, I’ve known
That since I found
His batman costume.
511
00:20:34,231 --> 00:20:35,791
And this is
A picture I drew
512
00:20:35,792 --> 00:20:37,131
Of their alien
Home world.
513
00:20:37,132 --> 00:20:39,659
The aliens who
Abducted you live
On a purple planet?
514
00:20:39,660 --> 00:20:40,461
Well, it’s
Green, actually,
515
00:20:40,462 --> 00:20:42,725
But my marker
Ran out, so I had
To improvise.
516
00:20:42,726 --> 00:20:45,065
May I present
The king of crazy,
517
00:20:45,066 --> 00:20:46,890
Our founder,
Mr. Fagen.
518
00:20:46,891 --> 00:20:48,230
You fit right in.
519
00:20:48,231 --> 00:20:49,494
Oh, thank you, sir.
520
00:20:49,495 --> 00:20:51,494
By the way, what
Makes you crazy?
521
00:20:51,495 --> 00:20:52,296
Nothing.
522
00:20:52,297 --> 00:20:53,165
I’m the sane one.
523
00:20:54,660 --> 00:20:58,758
I keep everyone
Grounded.Ah.
Their furniture?
All wicker!
524
00:20:58,759 --> 00:21:00,065
Well, why not?
525
00:21:00,066 --> 00:21:10,726
Now, I’ve got some
Lovely recipes.
526
00:21:14,132 --> 00:21:15,362
It’s sam.
527
00:21:15,363 --> 00:21:16,494
From the outside?
528
00:21:16,495 --> 00:21:20,131
Ah, I brought you
Some apple sauce.
529
00:21:20,132 --> 00:21:21,263
I’m totally lucid.
530
00:21:21,264 --> 00:21:22,824
If you even try to
Feed me that shit,
531
00:21:22,825 --> 00:21:23,791
I will tear
Off your arms
532
00:21:23,792 --> 00:21:25,296
And beat you
With the stumps.
533
00:21:25,297 --> 00:21:26,791
Not unless
You’re houdini.
534
00:21:26,792 --> 00:21:28,956
Just go tell the
Doctors I’m sane.
535
00:21:28,957 --> 00:21:30,890
Wow, this
Is awesome.
536
00:21:30,891 --> 00:21:32,791
Just like those
Bouncy castles
537
00:21:32,792 --> 00:21:34,494
The stupid carnies
Won’t let me play on
538
00:21:34,495 --> 00:21:37,330
Even though I
Meet the height
Restrictions.
539
00:21:37,660 --> 00:21:38,725
Woo!
No, sam!
540
00:21:38,726 --> 00:21:40,098
We don’t have
Time for this!
541
00:21:40,099 --> 00:21:42,263
Woo-hoo!
542
00:21:42,264 --> 00:21:43,560
I am so going
To kill you.
543
00:21:45,132 --> 00:21:47,296
One, two, three, four!
38235
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