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1
00:00:07,884 --> 00:00:09,364
My name is RJ Berger.
2
00:00:09,449 --> 00:00:11,930
Nature made me scrawny
and weird-looking,
3
00:00:12,014 --> 00:00:13,798
awkward and pale.
4
00:00:13,883 --> 00:00:15,537
Nature did a lot of things,
5
00:00:15,622 --> 00:00:19,495
but I'm not about to roll over
and be nature's bitch.
6
00:00:19,577 --> 00:00:21,188
I'm gonna beat it.
7
00:00:21,273 --> 00:00:22,753
♪ Something is not right
with me... ♪
8
00:00:22,838 --> 00:00:24,187
Beat the fact
that I have
9
00:00:24,273 --> 00:00:25,665
more pairs of glasses
than friends.
10
00:00:25,751 --> 00:00:27,665
Beat the fact
that I was born to lose.
11
00:00:27,750 --> 00:00:29,795
Oh, ride the dragon.
12
00:00:29,880 --> 00:00:31,708
Oh, ride the dragon.
Ride the dragon.
13
00:00:34,227 --> 00:00:35,794
Ride the dragon.
14
00:00:35,879 --> 00:00:37,272
Oh, yeah.
God.
15
00:00:37,357 --> 00:00:38,967
Oh, yeah.
16
00:00:39,052 --> 00:00:41,663
Hey, it's almost 7:00.
17
00:00:41,748 --> 00:00:43,097
Move that sweet little tuchus.
18
00:00:45,877 --> 00:00:47,531
Hello.
19
00:00:52,529 --> 00:00:53,835
RJ, are you okay?
20
00:00:53,920 --> 00:00:54,877
Fine.
21
00:00:54,963 --> 00:00:56,095
Are you crying?
22
00:00:56,180 --> 00:00:57,659
No.
23
00:00:57,746 --> 00:00:59,443
- RJ, look at me.
- Is something wrong?
24
00:00:59,528 --> 00:01:01,095
No. Can you just give me
another minute, please?
25
00:01:01,180 --> 00:01:03,356
I gave you a minute
15 minutes ago.
26
00:01:06,353 --> 00:01:07,528
Oh!
27
00:01:10,613 --> 00:01:11,701
Forgive me.
28
00:01:19,567 --> 00:01:20,351
♪ Hey ♪
29
00:01:26,697 --> 00:01:29,134
O-P-P.
"Objective, plan, perform."
30
00:01:29,218 --> 00:01:30,611
Our objective is clear.
31
00:01:30,696 --> 00:01:32,611
Get people to like us.
32
00:01:32,696 --> 00:01:35,699
Especially hot chicks
with low self-esteem.
33
00:01:35,782 --> 00:01:37,175
Our plan?
34
00:01:37,261 --> 00:01:39,219
Infiltrate the beauty mob
and charm them
35
00:01:39,303 --> 00:01:41,871
with our easy-going
awesomeness.
36
00:01:41,955 --> 00:01:44,131
Now all we got to do is...
37
00:01:44,216 --> 00:01:45,914
Dude.
38
00:01:45,999 --> 00:01:47,696
Dude, I'm trying to document
our rise to greatness.
39
00:01:47,780 --> 00:01:48,825
Are you paying attention?
40
00:01:50,867 --> 00:01:52,695
Jenny...
41
00:01:52,780 --> 00:01:53,694
Swanson.
42
00:02:02,126 --> 00:02:03,388
Be still, my beating balls.
43
00:02:04,560 --> 00:02:05,474
It's weird, you know?
44
00:02:05,560 --> 00:02:06,997
I know.
45
00:02:07,082 --> 00:02:07,996
Every year,
you think she...
46
00:02:08,082 --> 00:02:09,170
...can't get any hotter.
47
00:02:11,603 --> 00:02:13,605
Friday night's supposed
to be, like, insane.
48
00:02:13,689 --> 00:02:15,256
Swanson's pool party?
49
00:02:15,341 --> 00:02:17,299
Dude, it's the soiree
of the semester.
50
00:02:17,384 --> 00:02:20,431
I'm talking Robin Pretnar
in a bikini, okay?
51
00:02:20,514 --> 00:02:22,472
Bong rips and nip slips!
52
00:02:22,557 --> 00:02:24,690
It's the key to kicking off
our big year.
53
00:02:24,774 --> 00:02:26,341
That's one guest list
I don't think we're on.
54
00:02:28,513 --> 00:02:30,297
Robin Pretnar.
55
00:02:30,382 --> 00:02:32,645
Dude, I'd murder
everyone I love
56
00:02:32,730 --> 00:02:35,428
for one glimpse
of those pepperonis.
57
00:02:35,512 --> 00:02:37,296
'Sup, whores?
58
00:02:37,381 --> 00:02:39,383
Guess what's happening today.
59
00:02:39,467 --> 00:02:40,817
You're taking a weed whacker
to that mustache?
60
00:02:42,554 --> 00:02:44,600
Lipski's posting
sophomore study buddies.
61
00:02:44,684 --> 00:02:46,251
So?
62
00:02:46,336 --> 00:02:48,164
So perhaps I arranged
to be buddies
63
00:02:48,249 --> 00:02:50,294
with a certain someone.
64
00:02:50,379 --> 00:02:53,295
You know, for all those
late-night cramming sessions?
65
00:02:53,378 --> 00:02:55,729
Lily, why are you so eager
to ruin this friendship?
66
00:02:55,813 --> 00:02:58,511
Why are you so afraid
to ruin my sheets?
67
00:02:58,595 --> 00:03:00,336
Lily, if he wanted
to a dog,
68
00:03:00,421 --> 00:03:01,378
he'd just go to Amsterdam.
69
00:03:01,464 --> 00:03:04,511
Shut up, Miles.
70
00:03:04,594 --> 00:03:06,857
I thought about you
this morning, RJ.
71
00:03:13,071 --> 00:03:15,638
About our kiss
on the playground.
72
00:03:15,723 --> 00:03:16,985
That was
in kindergarten, Lily.
73
00:03:17,071 --> 00:03:18,333
Back when you weren't
74
00:03:18,418 --> 00:03:20,072
the only flat-chested girl
in our grade.
75
00:03:20,157 --> 00:03:22,028
Just because you
have bigger tits
76
00:03:22,113 --> 00:03:23,462
than half the girls in school...
77
00:03:33,068 --> 00:03:34,286
- There!
- That's what I'm talking about!
78
00:03:34,372 --> 00:03:35,939
What?
79
00:03:36,024 --> 00:03:37,460
Dude, Natsumi Taniko
just looked at you
80
00:03:37,545 --> 00:03:38,808
like you burned down her dojo.
81
00:03:38,893 --> 00:03:40,633
That's, like, the 15th time
she's done that.
82
00:03:40,719 --> 00:03:43,373
Did I tell you I have
a date with Raven on Friday?
83
00:03:43,457 --> 00:03:45,068
- Wait.
- Wait, I'm sorry.
84
00:03:45,153 --> 00:03:48,765
You're going out
with the Dark Knight?
85
00:03:48,848 --> 00:03:52,199
That kid is like five feet
of pure Columbine.
86
00:03:52,282 --> 00:03:53,631
Jealous?
87
00:03:53,717 --> 00:03:55,762
What, is he taking you
to the cemetery?
88
00:03:55,847 --> 00:03:57,501
You guys gonna drink
some absinthe?
89
00:03:57,586 --> 00:03:59,501
Maybe read from
the Twilightbooks?
90
00:03:59,585 --> 00:04:04,242
- Actually, he's taking me to
- Jenny Swanson's party, assholes.
91
00:04:04,324 --> 00:04:07,153
And I wouldn't have
to slum it with freshman goths
92
00:04:07,236 --> 00:04:11,588
if you would just man up
and take my offer, RJ.
93
00:04:11,670 --> 00:04:16,327
Any time, any place...
94
00:04:16,409 --> 00:04:17,932
any orifice.
95
00:04:29,754 --> 00:04:32,409
Oh, dude.
96
00:04:32,493 --> 00:04:36,192
Max Owens just gunned down
your boner in cold blood.
97
00:04:36,275 --> 00:04:37,494
What a choad.
98
00:04:47,664 --> 00:04:49,797
Hey, it's Lipski's
buddy list.
99
00:04:49,882 --> 00:04:50,839
I hope I got someone good.
100
00:04:50,925 --> 00:04:51,926
- Excuse me.
- Can I...
101
00:04:52,011 --> 00:04:53,970
Can I...
Excuse me.
102
00:04:54,055 --> 00:04:55,752
Can I...
103
00:04:55,837 --> 00:04:57,578
- Coming through!
- Look out!
104
00:04:57,663 --> 00:05:00,144
Move!
105
00:05:00,228 --> 00:05:01,751
Hey!
106
00:05:01,836 --> 00:05:04,926
Jake Dunbar and Alexina Kors.
107
00:05:05,009 --> 00:05:07,490
Brendan Jacoby
and Miranda Meyer.
108
00:05:07,574 --> 00:05:09,968
RJ Berger and...
109
00:05:12,139 --> 00:05:14,707
Jenny Swanson?
110
00:05:14,791 --> 00:05:17,054
What the [bleep]?
111
00:05:38,135 --> 00:05:39,702
♪ A-la-la,
a-la-la ♪
112
00:05:39,787 --> 00:05:41,179
♪ Give me three wishes ♪
113
00:05:41,264 --> 00:05:43,223
♪ I want to be
the dirty finger ♪
114
00:05:43,308 --> 00:05:45,005
♪ And his six bitches ♪
115
00:05:45,090 --> 00:05:46,875
♪ A-la-la,
a-la-la ♪
116
00:05:46,959 --> 00:05:48,482
♪ Give me more too ♪
117
00:05:48,568 --> 00:05:51,310
♪ I want to be
in that crazy band ♪
118
00:05:51,393 --> 00:05:53,874
Your dragon awaits,
my lady.
119
00:05:56,697 --> 00:05:58,437
Email me so I have yours.
120
00:06:11,564 --> 00:06:12,391
That's what she's doing!
121
00:06:14,824 --> 00:06:16,086
You gonna eat
that last piece, son?
122
00:06:16,171 --> 00:06:17,782
- No, thanks.
- I'm pretty full.
123
00:06:17,867 --> 00:06:19,956
- Oh, what about you, Bill?
- Last piece?
124
00:06:20,041 --> 00:06:21,782
Oh, better save
some room, Rick.
125
00:06:21,867 --> 00:06:23,390
Something tells me
I'm gonna be doing
126
00:06:23,475 --> 00:06:25,085
a lot of eating tonight.
127
00:06:25,170 --> 00:06:26,258
Ain't that right, Suze?
128
00:06:31,778 --> 00:06:33,997
As long as you don't spoil
your appetite, honey,
129
00:06:34,082 --> 00:06:36,302
'cause I brought
your favorite dessert.
130
00:06:36,386 --> 00:06:38,170
- Oh, I'll make room.
- I'll make room.
131
00:06:38,255 --> 00:06:40,518
Oh, you bring enough
for, uh, two?
132
00:06:40,602 --> 00:06:42,517
Or three?
133
00:06:42,602 --> 00:06:43,647
Oh, naughty!
134
00:06:43,732 --> 00:06:44,820
Three!
135
00:06:44,906 --> 00:06:47,126
Four!
136
00:06:47,210 --> 00:06:49,516
Nom, nom, nom, nom, nom,
nom, nom, nom, nom, nom!
137
00:06:49,601 --> 00:06:50,951
The buffet is open!
138
00:06:52,949 --> 00:06:55,603
You know, it's so funny,
139
00:06:55,687 --> 00:06:57,819
because you're talking
about Linda's vagina.
140
00:07:04,642 --> 00:07:06,600
I'm gonna go do drugs.
141
00:07:11,728 --> 00:07:14,818
I walked in on him
masturbating this morning.
142
00:07:17,075 --> 00:07:18,468
God bless him.
143
00:07:18,553 --> 00:07:21,556
He had his lotion
and his tissue all laid out.
144
00:07:21,639 --> 00:07:24,207
Just yesterday,
he was a baby in my arms.
145
00:07:24,291 --> 00:07:26,597
Now he's playing
with his baby arm!
146
00:07:28,856 --> 00:07:32,816
Oh, that's a...
oh, that's good.
147
00:07:35,289 --> 00:07:37,334
♪ Day and night ♪
148
00:07:37,419 --> 00:07:39,508
♪ I toss and turn
and I keep stressing my mind ♪
149
00:07:46,679 --> 00:07:49,333
God, it's so warm!
150
00:08:05,198 --> 00:08:08,201
- Yay!
- Whoo!
151
00:08:08,284 --> 00:08:10,852
I love you, RJ!
152
00:08:17,717 --> 00:08:18,979
What the [bleep], man?
153
00:08:19,065 --> 00:08:20,719
Hey, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa!
154
00:08:20,804 --> 00:08:22,806
- What the hell's your problem?
- 's your problem?
155
00:08:22,890 --> 00:08:24,109
Oh!
156
00:08:24,195 --> 00:08:25,500
Damn it, Patterson.
157
00:08:32,975 --> 00:08:34,411
Whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa!
158
00:08:36,758 --> 00:08:40,109
Canton, number 22, number 30.
159
00:08:40,192 --> 00:08:45,501
Pinkerton, number 21, number 18,
number 24, and number 6.
160
00:08:45,582 --> 00:08:46,758
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
161
00:08:46,843 --> 00:08:48,192
I don't have enough subs
to cover that.
162
00:08:48,278 --> 00:08:50,019
That leaves me
with four players!
163
00:08:50,103 --> 00:08:52,975
Then I guess
you'll have to forfeit.
164
00:08:53,059 --> 00:08:54,495
God damn it!
165
00:08:58,406 --> 00:09:00,495
Berger!
166
00:09:00,579 --> 00:09:01,711
Get over here.
167
00:09:06,144 --> 00:09:07,755
Please don't make me
mop up any more blood.
168
00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:09,406
Go put on a uniform.
169
00:09:09,491 --> 00:09:10,405
I don't even know how to play.
170
00:09:10,491 --> 00:09:12,102
God damn it, Berger!
171
00:09:12,187 --> 00:09:14,406
You go put on a uniform
or our deal is off.
172
00:09:14,490 --> 00:09:16,710
No more skipping gym.
173
00:09:16,794 --> 00:09:17,708
Now, hustle.
174
00:09:21,533 --> 00:09:23,883
God have mercy on us.
175
00:09:29,488 --> 00:09:32,056
♪ A modern day warrior,
mean, mean stride ♪
176
00:09:32,140 --> 00:09:34,839
♪ Today's Tom Sawyer,
mean, mean pride ♪
177
00:09:42,660 --> 00:09:45,575
Now, you listen to me.
178
00:09:45,660 --> 00:09:47,096
We are one basket away
from upsetting
179
00:09:47,181 --> 00:09:48,791
these undefeated pricks.
180
00:09:48,876 --> 00:09:53,446
All you got to do is stay out
of the way for 21 seconds.
181
00:09:53,528 --> 00:09:55,356
So just keep your
little toothpick arms down
182
00:09:55,440 --> 00:09:56,180
and lock your feet in place.
183
00:09:56,267 --> 00:09:57,921
You got it?
184
00:09:58,006 --> 00:10:00,269
- Yeah, okay.
- Good.
185
00:10:00,353 --> 00:10:01,833
Good.
186
00:10:01,918 --> 00:10:03,963
'Cause if you bone this
Cocker Spaniel,
187
00:10:04,047 --> 00:10:05,353
so help me,
I'll choke you to death
188
00:10:05,439 --> 00:10:06,701
in front of all these people.
189
00:10:09,091 --> 00:10:10,266
- All right.
- Okay.
190
00:10:10,351 --> 00:10:12,353
- I'll do my best.
- Good.
191
00:10:12,438 --> 00:10:15,136
Good.
Go get 'em.
192
00:10:17,611 --> 00:10:19,221
- Get 'em, bro!
- Get 'em!
193
00:10:22,262 --> 00:10:23,524
Get your ass...
194
00:10:23,610 --> 00:10:25,960
Hey, let's go, Pirates!
195
00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:31,219
That's how a man smells, bitch.
196
00:10:41,433 --> 00:10:42,826
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
197
00:11:27,730 --> 00:11:29,035
Dang!
198
00:11:35,033 --> 00:11:36,382
Oh, no.
199
00:11:36,467 --> 00:11:37,512
It's okay.
200
00:11:37,598 --> 00:11:39,426
At least he's got
his jockstrap...
201
00:11:42,076 --> 00:11:44,121
It's a god damn Buick Regal.
202
00:11:45,857 --> 00:11:47,903
Freaking tripod.
203
00:11:50,248 --> 00:11:51,728
We are saved.
204
00:11:51,813 --> 00:11:53,510
I'm soaked.
205
00:11:53,595 --> 00:11:55,292
me.
206
00:11:56,855 --> 00:11:58,683
You asshole!
207
00:11:58,768 --> 00:12:00,030
I can't believe
you never told me.
208
00:12:00,116 --> 00:12:02,728
Here I am looking
for our golden ticket.
209
00:12:02,811 --> 00:12:04,334
It's been draped over your balls
this whole time.
210
00:12:04,420 --> 00:12:06,335
Miles...
211
00:12:06,419 --> 00:12:07,550
Let me see that beautiful
bastard, I want to kiss it.
212
00:12:07,637 --> 00:12:08,899
- Miles, come on, man.
- Just the tip, all right?
213
00:12:08,984 --> 00:12:10,289
Just like this.
Totally non-gay.
214
00:12:10,375 --> 00:12:13,378
Miles!
215
00:12:13,461 --> 00:12:15,681
It's a curse, dude.
216
00:12:15,765 --> 00:12:17,985
What are you
talking about, curse?
217
00:12:18,070 --> 00:12:20,594
Okay, fine.
218
00:12:20,678 --> 00:12:21,940
Do you want to know
why Natsumi Taniko
219
00:12:22,025 --> 00:12:24,201
freaks every time
she sees me?
220
00:12:24,285 --> 00:12:25,678
Yeah.
221
00:12:29,242 --> 00:12:31,026
Last summer, remember
when I tutored her in English?
222
00:12:31,111 --> 00:12:31,721
Mm-hmm.
223
00:12:34,893 --> 00:12:38,200
Well, she was, like,
the first normal girl
224
00:12:38,283 --> 00:12:42,723
who ever saw me like...
like I was a normal guy.
225
00:12:42,805 --> 00:12:45,024
Mmm.
226
00:12:45,108 --> 00:12:46,457
You're a dope Frencher.
227
00:12:49,586 --> 00:12:51,457
I know.
228
00:12:51,542 --> 00:12:53,196
Um...
229
00:12:53,281 --> 00:12:55,544
My boner just got
all hard and...
230
00:12:58,411 --> 00:12:59,455
Oh, what?
231
00:13:08,235 --> 00:13:09,497
- Oh.
- Oh, yeah.
232
00:13:11,887 --> 00:13:14,237
- Natsumi, are you okay?
- Natsumi!
233
00:13:14,321 --> 00:13:15,583
Are you choking?
234
00:13:15,669 --> 00:13:17,802
Natsumi!
235
00:13:19,581 --> 00:13:20,974
- Wait.
- Wait. Wait.
236
00:13:21,059 --> 00:13:23,017
That's why you
kept it a secret?
237
00:13:23,102 --> 00:13:25,365
I almost killed her, dude.
238
00:13:25,449 --> 00:13:27,364
It was an accident, RJ.
239
00:13:27,449 --> 00:13:29,277
The Japanese mouth
isn't designed to handle
240
00:13:29,362 --> 00:13:30,668
that kind of size.
241
00:13:30,753 --> 00:13:33,103
You see those little
egg rolls they eat?
242
00:13:33,187 --> 00:13:36,495
She wasn't ready for an American
foot-long hot dog.
243
00:13:36,578 --> 00:13:39,276
Dude, you have something
that every guy in school
244
00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:41,493
would kill for.
245
00:13:41,578 --> 00:13:44,233
Okay, that may be,
246
00:13:44,316 --> 00:13:46,710
but they'd still always
find a way to tear me down.
247
00:13:46,795 --> 00:13:49,493
And who's always there
to pick you up, huh?
248
00:13:49,576 --> 00:13:51,186
Who's the only one
who showed up to Shakey's
249
00:13:51,271 --> 00:13:53,012
on your seventh birthday?
250
00:13:53,097 --> 00:13:55,578
Who's the only one
who in the ball pit?
251
00:13:55,662 --> 00:13:57,533
That could have been anybody.
252
00:13:57,619 --> 00:13:59,882
Miles, they're gonna
destroy me.
253
00:13:59,966 --> 00:14:03,143
Maybe they will
and maybe they won't.
254
00:14:03,226 --> 00:14:06,708
But at least they'll be
paying attention.
255
00:14:18,528 --> 00:14:20,530
Oh, wow.
256
00:14:20,615 --> 00:14:24,009
This is...
beautiful.
257
00:14:24,092 --> 00:14:25,616
We deserve this, right?
258
00:14:25,701 --> 00:14:26,919
- We so deserve this.
- We deserve this.
259
00:14:27,005 --> 00:14:29,573
This is, like,
out of a Young Jeezy video.
260
00:14:29,657 --> 00:14:31,659
- Yeah.
- Okay, hands in.
261
00:14:34,134 --> 00:14:36,745
Okay.
262
00:14:36,829 --> 00:14:38,831
Who invited those losers?
263
00:14:38,916 --> 00:14:40,788
- All right.
- All right.
264
00:14:40,873 --> 00:14:42,875
"Easy-going awesomeness,"
on three.
265
00:14:42,959 --> 00:14:44,787
All right.
One, two...
266
00:14:44,872 --> 00:14:46,264
Easy-going awesomeness.
267
00:14:46,349 --> 00:14:49,004
Okay, let's mingle, mingle.
268
00:14:49,088 --> 00:14:50,133
Okay.
269
00:14:50,219 --> 00:14:52,003
Play it cool.
Play cool.
270
00:14:54,392 --> 00:14:56,394
My whores made it!
271
00:14:56,479 --> 00:14:58,220
RJ, looking good.
272
00:15:19,257 --> 00:15:21,433
So, Berger...
273
00:15:21,517 --> 00:15:25,217
you ready to grab destiny
by the balls?
274
00:15:28,647 --> 00:15:32,172
So then I'm like,
"It's just my pinky."
275
00:15:32,255 --> 00:15:34,214
You get it?
276
00:15:34,299 --> 00:15:37,171
The pinky?
277
00:15:37,254 --> 00:15:40,214
Cold.
278
00:15:40,298 --> 00:15:41,386
Hot.
279
00:15:41,471 --> 00:15:43,299
But still a diss.
280
00:15:43,384 --> 00:15:44,211
Dude, we are striking out.
281
00:15:44,297 --> 00:15:45,733
Oh, my God.
282
00:15:45,818 --> 00:15:47,515
Is that sparkling malt liquor?
283
00:15:47,601 --> 00:15:49,733
- Robin, hey.
- Yeah.
284
00:15:49,817 --> 00:15:52,211
I love sparkling malt liquor.
285
00:15:55,338 --> 00:15:58,646
- You are so adorable,
- Robin Pretnar.
286
00:16:00,424 --> 00:16:04,211
You're like a little meerkat...
287
00:16:04,294 --> 00:16:05,817
with boobies.
288
00:16:06,946 --> 00:16:08,295
- Oh!
- Uh-oh!
289
00:16:08,380 --> 00:16:11,470
Shh! Shh!
Ooh! Ooh! Shh!
290
00:16:11,553 --> 00:16:13,250
Okay.
Okay.
291
00:16:13,335 --> 00:16:14,902
It's okay.
292
00:16:14,987 --> 00:16:17,947
No one saw that.
No one saw that.
293
00:16:18,031 --> 00:16:20,294
Not gonna let that
kill our vibe, are we?
294
00:16:24,682 --> 00:16:25,726
Ugh.
295
00:16:31,811 --> 00:16:33,030
- Is it stuck?
- No.
296
00:16:33,115 --> 00:16:34,943
I'm just a weakling.
297
00:16:35,028 --> 00:16:36,812
One of the drawbacks
of being little, I guess.
298
00:16:36,897 --> 00:16:39,421
Yeah.
299
00:16:39,505 --> 00:16:43,466
Maybe I can help.
300
00:16:43,548 --> 00:16:44,854
That is really...
301
00:16:46,156 --> 00:16:47,288
That is really stuck
right there.
302
00:16:47,374 --> 00:16:48,723
Yeah.
303
00:16:48,808 --> 00:16:52,464
Hey, you're RJ Berger, right?
304
00:16:52,547 --> 00:16:54,767
Why, yes, I am.
305
00:16:54,851 --> 00:16:57,680
Maybe you should try pushing
with your [bleep].
306
00:17:04,892 --> 00:17:07,460
So the big Lipski test?
307
00:17:11,326 --> 00:17:13,328
Bio's my worst subject.
308
00:17:13,412 --> 00:17:15,414
I could really use the grade
to make honors,
309
00:17:15,499 --> 00:17:19,373
so I'm counting on you,
study buddy.
310
00:17:20,281 --> 00:17:21,499
I mean...
311
00:17:21,586 --> 00:17:23,979
Lipski.
312
00:17:30,888 --> 00:17:32,411
Wait.
313
00:17:32,496 --> 00:17:34,063
Lipski's test.
314
00:17:34,148 --> 00:17:38,152
Yes, I would love
to study you... with you.
315
00:17:38,234 --> 00:17:42,412
Um, biology's actually, like,
one of my best subjects,
316
00:17:42,494 --> 00:17:45,889
and I can name, like,
six different types of zygotes
317
00:17:45,972 --> 00:17:47,539
off the top of my head
right now.
318
00:17:47,625 --> 00:17:48,800
But I'm not going to.
319
00:17:51,189 --> 00:17:52,930
Great.
320
00:17:54,536 --> 00:17:56,625
Well, you have my email.
321
00:17:56,710 --> 00:17:58,582
- I do.
- I do.
322
00:17:58,667 --> 00:18:01,713
- Cool. Thanks.
- Yep, cool.
323
00:18:01,796 --> 00:18:05,844
♪ You spin my head
right round, right round ♪
324
00:18:05,926 --> 00:18:09,103
♪ When you go down,
when you go down, down ♪
325
00:18:10,186 --> 00:18:11,143
- Oh!
- Oh, my God.
326
00:18:15,577 --> 00:18:16,926
You ever talk to her again,
327
00:18:17,011 --> 00:18:19,970
I'll kill you,
donkey dick.
328
00:18:24,532 --> 00:18:26,447
Dude, are you okay?
329
00:18:26,531 --> 00:18:28,272
Of course he's not okay,
asshole!
330
00:18:28,357 --> 00:18:31,055
Oh, man.
331
00:18:31,139 --> 00:18:32,576
Oh, man.
332
00:18:32,661 --> 00:18:34,924
Come on.
Let's bounce, man.
333
00:18:35,008 --> 00:18:36,792
Ow.
334
00:18:46,007 --> 00:18:49,140
No.
335
00:18:49,223 --> 00:18:50,442
RJ, don't!
336
00:18:57,179 --> 00:18:58,659
Hell you doing talking
to that guy?
337
00:18:58,744 --> 00:18:59,658
Are you trying to embarrass me?
338
00:18:59,744 --> 00:19:01,746
I mean, the kid's a freak.
339
00:19:01,830 --> 00:19:02,918
What the
do you want?
340
00:19:08,090 --> 00:19:09,744
Oh!
341
00:19:17,871 --> 00:19:22,223
That's how a man smells, bitch.
342
00:19:26,043 --> 00:19:27,392
I'll email you tomorrow.
343
00:19:37,215 --> 00:19:40,262
- Dude, you just served
- Max Owens a cup of nut musk!
344
00:19:40,345 --> 00:19:41,955
I know.
345
00:19:42,041 --> 00:19:43,216
- You realize you're dead
- Monday, right?
346
00:19:43,301 --> 00:19:46,348
Yeah.
347
00:19:46,431 --> 00:19:48,781
But that's Monday.
348
00:19:48,866 --> 00:19:49,911
Yeah.
349
00:19:49,996 --> 00:19:51,824
♪ I'm on the highway to hell ♪
350
00:19:51,909 --> 00:19:54,389
My name is RJ Berger.
351
00:19:54,473 --> 00:19:57,868
Nature made me scrawny
and weird-looking,
352
00:19:57,951 --> 00:20:00,650
awkward and pale...
353
00:20:00,734 --> 00:20:02,692
but it also
gave me a gift,
354
00:20:02,776 --> 00:20:04,256
and I intend to use it.
355
00:20:07,602 --> 00:20:10,039
Next on The Hard Times
of RJ Berger...
356
00:20:10,123 --> 00:20:12,082
How are my two
favorite study buddies?
357
00:20:12,166 --> 00:20:14,647
- Dude, I'm tired of being
- Max Owens' bitch.
358
00:20:14,732 --> 00:20:15,907
I'm gonna run
for SGA president.
359
00:20:15,992 --> 00:20:17,559
It's a suicide mission.
360
00:20:17,644 --> 00:20:20,124
- He's unbeatable!
- No one's unbeatable, Miles.
361
00:20:20,208 --> 00:20:22,515
For every Max Owens,
there's ten of us.
362
00:20:22,599 --> 00:20:23,513
We could really win this.
363
00:20:23,599 --> 00:20:25,035
Travis Barker!
24155
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