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(dark wind music)

(extended flatulence)

(man sighs)

(ominous music)

(hatchet whooshes) (man groans)

(man screams)

(hatchet whooshes)

(man screams)

(hatchet whooshes)

(man screams)

(hatchet whooshes)

(brain thuds)

(hatchet whooshes)

(man screams)

(hatchet whooshes)

(man screams)

(body thumps)

(heavy door slams)

(electronic dance music)

(ominous music)

- Wait a minute.

No.

No.

No, don't.

Please.

Anything.

No.

(gun fires)

(ominous music)

(heavy door slams)

(heavy door slams)

(electronic dance music)

(door closes)

- Oh, yeah.

Here we go.

Oh!

Oh, oh.

(man snaps fingers)

(ominous music)

(hatchet whooshes)

(knife whooshes) (man screams)

(blood splashes)

(man screams)

(blood splashes)

(man screams)

(man grunts)

(knife whooshes)

(man chokes and splutters)

(eerie tones drone)

(man chokes and splutters)

(brush whooshes)

(man screams)

(flesh squelches and crunches) (man screams)

(heavy door slams)

(heavy door slams)

(heavy door slams)

(dramatic orchestral music)

(birds chirp)

- Chief. Chief, listen to me.

This is Amityville.

We have tourist season starting in a month.

I've got reports.

I don't know if you have got that report, too.

There's a house in our town.

There's a toilet in a house that's killing people.

(dramatic music)

(man screams)

How in the world are we gonna get tourists

to come to our town, if a toilet is killing people?

(dark electronic music)

(gun fires) (man screams)

Chief, we got three weeks before the summer

vacation season starts.

Everything, put every deputy and detective you have on that.

Chief. Chief, this isn't the first time this has happened.

This is your career. This is my career.

This is the town's future.

Please solve this and find that toilet, now!

All right, all right. You know what?

I've heard that before. Your best hasn't solved this.

We need extra best from you. This has to be solved.

The town's future. We have three weeks, or this town dies.

Chief, get it done.

Take everybody off the street. Detectives.

This has to be solved.

We have to find this toilet that's killing people

(dramatic music)

(flesh squelches and crunches)

Or it's gonna kill this town.

I don't want another murderer, Chief. Get it done.

I need the best, absolutely the best you got,

right now, starting today.

I'm hanging up. Get it done.

I need plumbers. I need rotor rooters.

I need anyone that has anything to do with toilets

to help you find the death toilet.

It's in this town. It has to be found.

Chief, get it done.

(upbeat percussive music)

- Yeah, it's great out here.

Yeah. I just... (sighs)

I can't. You know, I can't thank the show enough.

It's been a long time since...

Yeah, the numbers. The numbers are great.

A lot of the, you know, we get new subscribers every day.

I get notifications con...

(dog barks) There goes one now.

Yeah. Just, the show's been really, really good to me.

And it's just great being out here,

being able to just sort of,

I don't know, relax and take in the scenery

and just the sights and the sound.

It's just great to be with Mother Nature.

Yeah. So, the vacation's going great.

I'm hoping to be able to stay on a couple more days here.

(phone rings) Actually, hold on a second.

I gotta take this. Hold on, I'll call you back.

Yes?

Yes, sir. This is Gregg G. Allin.

I am. Yes, I am.

I'm Greg the ghost guy. Yes.

Yes, sir.

Yes, sir.

That sounds serious.

Yes, sir. Yes, sir.

So, let me see if I got this right.

There's been a rash of killings in Amityville, by toilets?

Toilet killings in Amityville?

There's been a rash of toilet killings in Amityville?

(Greg chuckles)

Toilets killing people. Is that what you're telling me?

I'm sorry. Yes, sir.

Yes.

Right away.

So, are you telling me that you want me to go

to the actual Amityville house?

That's where this has happened?

You're saying that's where

the last toilet killing has happened?

At the Amityville House?

Well, you can count on me. Yes, sir.

I hate to be, I hate to be...

I hate to bring this up at such a delicate time

for your city, but is there there any...

Will I be pay...

Will there be any money involved in this or?

Hey, guys.

I just received a frantic phone call

from the Chief of Police in Amityville, New York.

That's right. That Amityville, New York.

Hey, everybody. Gregg G. Allin here from The Ghost Hunters.

Oh, wait. Sorry.

Hey, everybody.

Gregg G. Allin here from "Greg the Ghost Hunter".

I just received a frantic phone call

regarding haunted toilets in Amityville.

That's right. Amityville.

You've heard of it. You know, you love it.

You've seen the stories, you've seen the movies,

you've heard 'em all, you've read the books.

Now, there is supposedly a rash of murders in the city,

in the town of Amityville at the house,

the Amityville house.

I'm gonna head over there.

I'm gonna head over there and I'm gonna try

to see if I can't help these guys

take care of their problem.

And you know how Gregg G. Allin does it.

When he goes on a ghost hunt, when he goes on a haunting,

I get to the bottom of it.

So, stay with me. Stay with me.

This is sort of an emergency situation.

This is sort of a frantic call.

So, we're gonna be short equipment,

we're gonna be short gadgets and tech.

It's gonna be raw, like the first episode, guys.

Stay with me. Stay with me.

Promise you're not gonna be disappointed in what we see.

This is Gregg G. Allin out from "Greg's Ghost Hunting".

As you may or may not know, guys, Gregg G. Allin

is on vacation right now, and obviously I'm not in my normal

ghost hunting attire.

You know, I'm relaxing. I've needed this vacation.

But I'm cutting it short.

The phone call I received was quite frantic,

and I've gotta cut my vacation short.

Like I said before, this is gonna be a raw, raw hunt,

because I'm going it alone.

I'm going to...

I'm not gonna have all the gadgets

and the tech and the gear.

I'm gonna go on instinct and my

empathic energies

that I've had for years.

So, what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna change out

of my vacation attire,

and then we're gonna get on that plane.

Amityville is going to meet Gregg G. Allin,

and the ghost hunting team,

which will just be me, this time around.

This is Gregg G. Allin out.

Don't forget to like and subscribe.

Leave comments below.

Stick with me. Don't forget to smash that like button, guys.

Don't forget to just slam it. Slam it hard.

(distant plane engines roar)

(keyboard clacks)

- Hey, Melissa! Have you heard anything on the toilet yet?

We're waiting to hear. Please let me know, ASAP.

(keyboard clacks)

We have to find out what's happening.

Please try to get word,

so I can know where we are in this death toilet search.

(keyboard clacks)

Melissa, please find out what's going on with the crapper.

We have to get it done.

We have to find the crapper, before it kills someone else.

Please. Make this a priority.

(keyboard clacks)

Melissa, if we don't find this crapper and kill it,

this whole town is gonna lose a tremendous amount of revenue

'cause no one's coming.

No one likes dirty crappers.

No one likes anything but clean crappers

and we don't have one, we need to find it.

Melissa, makes this a priority, please.

(dramatic orchestral music)

(dramatic music continues)

(distant bell tolls)

(distant bell tolls)

(distant bell tolls)

(ominous orchestral music)

(distant bell tolls)

This is Mayor Dump of Amityville.

I'm so happy, and I'm so mad that we are in this situation.

The police chief has given me your name

and I'm contacting you.

- Yes, sir.

- We are in trouble here in Amityville.

We are desperately in trouble.

Tourist season is starting in three weeks.

We have a home where there's a toilet killing people.

- I got it. Yes.

- [Dump] We have to find it. We have to exorcize it.

- Yes, sir.

- I don't care how you do it, what your resources are.

I don't need to know how you get it done. Just get it done.

The police haven't got it done.

I need you to find this toilet. Kill this toilet.

It has to be done. It has to be done now.

Help us out. You got to do it.

You have to do it.

- Got it.

- Listen. You are the expert in this area.

That's why I am talking to you. We need to get this done.

I know you can get it done.

- Yes, sir.

- I've been in your situation before,

where we've had to solve...

We've had a major problem and we had to solve it.

And I don't know how you can do it, but please,

you're my last resort.

You're my last stop.

It has to get done. It needs to get done.

I trust you. You are my last hope.

I've been there. I know how terrible things can get.

I've been in 'Nam, I've been in Iraq,

I've been at Desert Storm.

It is terrible.

I've been in Kosovo. I know it has to get done.

We got it done. I need you to get it done.

Listen, this is Mayor Dump.

My career, the future of this town,

is right now, it has to be solved.

Solve it, please, for me.

This is Mayor Dump, begging you to find this toilet

and kill it.

- Keys in the mailbox. Got it.

I didn't bring extra, so don't sleep on the sheets.

Okay, if I'm gonna sleep over, don't sleep on the sheets.

Okay. Okay.

Paper towels. Got it.

Okay. Keys in the mailbox.

Yes, I got it. I understand.

Okay. Thank you.

I'm heading in now.

Hey, everybody. I've arrived.

I'm here, in Amityville, at the Amityville house.

We got that frantic phone call while I was on vacation

and I rushed out here, regarding the overzealous commode

that's overstepping his worldly bounds.

There's been a murder here.

There has been a string of hauntings.

Right now, I'm going to go onto the house.

I'm going to do my ritual.

I'm gonna check the vibe of the place.

I'm gonna display the crystal.

I'm gonna speak to the home.

Everything that we do here, on the ghost show.

Once I get more in tune with the vibe here,

I'll be checking in with you.

I'll set up the cameras and we'll see what happens here.

I gotta, you know, I always go in before.

You guys know this about me.

Before I set up the cameras, before I set up the tech,

before I set up any of the gear, the lighting, the EVTs,

the BRSs and and all the other equipment that I use.

I always go in and speak to the house.

I feel the intentions, I feel sort of the energy.

Be it good or bad, you know?

You know that we've had good or bad,

so, I'm gonna go in, I'm gonna get the vibe.

I'm gonna get the feeling, the lay of the land.

And then we're gonna get down to business here.

All right.

(ominous music)

(box clacks)

(lock clicks)

Hello?

Hello?

Gregg G. Allin.

Ghost hunter.

Hello?

(door closes)

(locks clack)

So, I'm in the Amityville house, everybody.

Beautiful home. It's a beautiful home.

Lived in. Well lived in.

Uh, there's a feeling.

I got a sense of immediate foreboding,

down into the family room here.

Well kept. A lot of love has grown in this home.

I can tell.

Things have changed.

Things have been changed around here, since it's been built.

This room was not originally here.

This has been added on, or at some point,

this room wasn't originally here.

Move through. Moving through the house a little bit.

There's a...

There's a foreboding.

Like, I feel,

right my heart here, I feel like there's

an overwhelming sense of pure...

(sniffs deeply)

It smells like evil.

It smells like evil.

- All right, we'll just move through

the rest of the house here, guys.

I'm trying to, uh...

You know, Greg Allin always carries his healing crystal.

So, I'm gonna hold onto this, while I speak to the house.

While I move through and sort of catch the feelings

of what's going on here.

Kitchen.

As of right now, I haven't heard of any issues

that've happened in the kitchen,

but we're gonna move through.

We'll just move through the house here.

And see what else is going on.

All right.

This looks like sort of a rumpus room?

Entertainment.

Entertainment room. Got television and things.

Big screen. Okay.

(ominous music)

Some of the earlier murders had taken place upstairs,

in this home.

In the children's room, the parent's room.

So, I have to admit, I'm a little freaked out.

So, we're gonna head on up,

but I'm not gonna stay upstairs very long.

I'm not here to investigate those particular murders,

but I'm gonna head upstairs

because curiosity is getting me a little bit.

But I just can't come into the Amityville house,

without having...

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. That's about as far as I'm willing to go with that.

So, I'm gonna head back downstairs

and we're gonna talk about the...

Have a look at the toilet in question.

(ominous music)

Okay. This is the bathroom.

Clean.

Well kept. Well kept.

All right.

(dramatic music)

(flesh squelches and crunches)

Now, that's the 1975 Max Flow B Series.

This is the toilet in question.

It's not a rare toilet.

It is an older toilet,

but nothing particularly interesting about...

(eerie music)

Okay, guys.

There's definitely something wrong with this toilet.

There's an issue here.

I'm gonna back away, for now.

(sighs) No, I can't.

Curiosity's got the better of me now, everybody.

(Greg sighs)

I'll just turn this camera around, just so you know.

You know, it's just a regular, you know?

You see one of these three-four times a day.

It doesn't seem out of the ordinary, but there is a...

(sniffs) There's a smell of evil coming off.

There's a smell of evil coming off of this toilet that is...

It's beyond any truck stop.

Any, um...

Any gas station.

There's an evil coming off of this toilet, guys.

I'm going to definitely have to investigate further.

(ominous music)

Okay, everybody. I've seen the house, I've seen the grounds.

I've been upstairs

and saw the rooms that the original murders were in.

I saw the toilet that is in question here that has

apparently caused a murder and some other various...

(muffled high-pitched call)

Some other various...

Hello?

- Hello? - Hey.

I was to understand that I was here by myself.

- Um...

Uh, my name's Sebastian and what is your name?

- Sebastian. My name is Greg.

Gregg G. Allin. I'm a ghost hunter.

I was called by Mayor Dump. - Oh, yes!

Yes!

- Is it okay if I get you on camera?

Is it okay if I get you on-

- Is that what that is? - This is a camera.

It's also a phone.

You know, I came in earlier and I checked the lock,

and I called out, I didn't hear anybody.

And I was actually in that room earlier,

and there was no one there.

Where'd you come from, my guy? Where'd you-

- Well, originally, the family, we were in Kansas.

- No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm sorry.

Where did you come from, in the house?

- Oh, I, I...

I was there.

Look, maybe we just didn't see each other.

It is a big house.

I am the groundskeeper.

Okay. Well, Sebastian, it's great to meet you.

You know, I was called by Mayor Dump.

They left the keys for me.

I was told that I was gonna do some investigating-

- Because of what happened?

- Well, yeah. A couple things have happened here.

Have you been here long?

- Oh, I'm the groundskeeper.

How many years have I been here?

It's been a little while. Been about 11 months?

- 11 months.

- Yeah.

- The last reported murder was-

- Should I face the camera? I've been here, 11 months!

- No, no, no. It's fine.

This is for my viewers.

I have a YouTube show where I'm an empath

and a ghost hunter.

- Oh, you're...

(sighs) My manners.

You're shooting. I'm so sorry.

- Sorry, I'm shooting. - I'm so sorry.

- Again, Gregg G. Allin.

- Pleasure meeting you. I will not be a bother.

I'm gonna go back upstairs. - Okay.

- [Sebastian] Sorry to bother you. Happy to be on the show!

Toodles!

- You didn't come from upstairs.

Okay.

It's great to meet you.

(Greg chuckles)

Okay.

Guys, that was weird.

That was weird. I was told I was gonna be here alone.

Yeah, I'm gonna sign off. I'm going to get something to eat.

I'm gonna regroup my thoughts. That was very peculiar.

He came from this room.

Earlier, I had been in that room,

and there was nobody in there.

There's no doors. There's a window.

It's a sealed window.

And then he said he was gonna "Go back upstairs."

So, I'm gonna get something to eat. I'm gonna regroup, guys.

All right. This is Gregg G. Allin signing off, for now.

(ominous music)

Yeah, well, I haven't really seen anything too...

Too haunted or too crazy here.

I haven't seen anything, out of the ordinary.

The last family that lived here all died of diarrhea.

Yeah.

All of 'em.

(chuckles) Yeah, there was a toddler.

I think that the toddler wasn't even potty trained yet,

and it died of diarrhea.

The child imploded.

Rhea!

So, I was just doing a sign off,

and suddenly, in the background,

this dude just pops into frame,

behind me, in a room that I had been in already.

That there was no one there. There's no door.

There's only one way in, there's a sealed window.

And this guy was just there. He didn't walk past me.

He didn't sneak in. Just, he was suddenly there.

(bright electronic tones)

I did a quick little impromptu interview with him.

He was the weirdest

man I think I've ever encountered.

He was just in these weird Christmasy pajamas.

The buttons weren't...

He was just a weird, weird little man.

Quite possibly looked like he may have already been dead.

I don't know. Face was gone.

It was just, you know, thin and sunken in.

He was real creepy and he introduced himself,

"Oh, hi. I'm Sebastian.

I'm the groundskeeper."

There was no... (chuckles)

I mean, get this. The guy just shows up in frame.

He didn't come into the house. He was already in here.

(ominous music)

Okay.

Things have quieted down in the house a little bit.

I've had a little bit to eat.

I had the run in with Sebastian,

which was completely bizarre because

no noises have been made in the house.

I haven't heard anything. In fact, it's...

Other than the things that have happened here before,

it's a fairly uninteresting home, as of yet.

So, I'm going to settle in for the night.

I've decided to take refuge here, in the rumpus room.

It's the less threatening of the rooms in the house to me.

I don't catch sort of the evil vibe

that I do in some of the other houses, so,

I'm gonna sign off for the night.

I'm gonna catch some Zs and I'll report in with you

in the morning, or as events happen,

through the rest of the evening.

So, I'm just going to sign off for now,

and we'll see what, uh, we'll see what happens.

(eerie music)

(suspenseful music)

(Greg screams)

(Greg gasps)

(ominous music)

All right.

You know that term, "Things that go bump in the night"?

Well, I was sound asleep and I heard an odd sound.

So, I'm going to investigate what that is here.

I was dead asleep and I heard a bump.

Just an odd sound. So, I'm gonna go and check it out.

And, uh...

Strange occurrences are happening here. Okay.

(door creaks)

- I beg your pardon! - I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

- Shut the door, please! - I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

- [Sebastian] I need to go to sleep!

(birds squawk)

- Okay.

All right, guys.

Gotta make a plan here.

We gotta see the grounds.

We have to give the house a full investigation.

Okay. Make some notes.

All right.

So, had an interesting evening.

Had to run in with my man, Sebastian,

who supposedly lives here, or does not live here.

I don't know. I walked in on him dropping a deuce.

I heard a bump in the night.

I wasn't sure what was going on.

But I tell ya, I'm gonna do a thorough search of the house,

investigate the rooms,

check the perimeter of the house really good.

I got a look when I first got here,

but I'm gonna give it a really good look.

For any sort of weirdness. Of course, I brought my crystal.

I bring my crystal with me, wherever I go.

You know that about me.

I brought my medicine man crow feather.

It keeps me protected.

I keep this new to my heart, at all times.

You guys know this about me and the show with my crystal.

My crow feather and my empath experiences,

I'm gonna hopefully pick up some,

possibly some other worldly sounds, sights,

investigate what's going on.

Maybe I find out what the deal is with Sebastian.

I don't know.

I brought my EVR.

We can check for various different

code signatures and things of that nature.

But I'm gonna finish up my breakfast here.

Having a tea, as well.

And then we will...

We'll get really, really deep into investigating.

You know, at first glance, guys,

and after spending the night,

it doesn't seem like there's a whole lot going on here.

So, it doesn't seem that haunted,

other than the weird dude that lives here, so...

But I'm gonna get out, I'm gonna really,

really check the bowels of this house.

I'm gonna get real deep in my investigation.

Finish my cereal,

and my tea,

and see what's what.

Like I said, previously.

Doesn't seem like this place is haunted at all.

It just seems like a really nice house in upstate New York.

(suspenseful percussive music)

(knocker clinks)

(music continues)

(dark orchestral music)

(birds chirp)

(dark orchestral music continues)

(prolonged flatulence)

(prolonged flatulence)

(prolonged flatulence)

(prolonged flatulence)

(prolonged flatulence)

(music continues)

(Greg sniffs)

Hey, guys. It's Greg, checking in.

You know, I've been at the Amityville house here,

about a day and a half now, and it's bunk.

There's just, this house isn't haunted.

There's nothing wrong here.

Nothing has happened out of the ordinary,

other than the groundskeeper, showing up outta nowhere.

I walked in on him dropping a deuce.

I haven't seen hide, nor hair of him, since then.

I haven't heard him. He hasn't interrupted me.

He hasn't stifled my investigation, in any way.

This house just isn't haunted, guys. You know?

I appreciate the trip out. You know?

I had a nice meal at the airport. I had some cereal.

I mean, other than that, this is not a haunted house.

I've burned so much footage and I've made such an effort

that this obviously is gonna make it as an episode,

maybe a blooper, maybe a debunked haunted series.

Maybe I do...

It's too late now.

I've got all the footage.

The mayor of the town was probably a pleasant gentleman,

but he was very frantic on the phone, insisting that

there'd been a murder here and that it's haunted,

and that a whole family died of diarrhea.

I just...

I think they're just trying to get their...

Something's happened.

They're trying to get their town on the map.

They're trying to, I don't know what the deal is.

They're trying to drum up some tourism.

I got a flight out in the morning.

I have a flight out in the morning.

I'm gonna sleep over tonight, and um...

Once that's done, I'm gonna get back in the rental car.

Deuces. I'm peacing out.

This place, it's not haunted.

Lovely town, lovely home, but beyond that,

it's just a regular house and a regular old home.

This is Gregg G. Allin, signing off,

from the Amityville house.

(eerie music)

(heavy door slams)

(heavy door slams)

(heavy door slams)

(prolonged flatulence)

(Sebastian moans)

(prolonged flatulence)

- Hoo!

(prolonged flatulence)

Hoo!

(Sebastian groans) (water splashes)

(Sebastian moans)

(intense string music)

(knife whooshes)

(Sebastian groans)

(knife whooshes)

(Sebastian groans)

(knife whooshes) (Sebastian screams)

(knife whooshes)

(Sebastian screams)

(knife whooshes)

(Sebastian screams)

(knife whooshes)

(Sebastian screams)

(knife whooshes)

(Sebastian screams)

(knife whooshes)

(Sebastian screams)

(ominous music)

(prolonged flatulence)

- [Toilet] Leave!

(ominous orchestral music) (thunder thumps rhythmically)

(eerie music)

(birds chirp and squawk)

- Sebastian!

Sebastian?

I'm taking off.

My time's up here.

Sebastian?

Sebastian?

Oh, my God!

(ominous music)

Oh, my God!

(ominous music continues)

(Greg screams)

- [Toilet] Leave!

(eerie music)

- This is not the call I wanted to get.

What are you telling me? You can't kill this toilet?

You are not leaving town.

Don't even tell me you're leaving town.

I'll get the chief to put roadblocks

on every road out of Amityville.

You are not leaving, until you kill this toilet.

I've killed people, all over the world.

You can kill a freakin' toilet. Get it done.

I don't want to hear any excuses.

We need this death toilet dead.

- Yeah. No, there's no way.

I'm outta here. I'm outta here.

This is more than I think I'm capable of handling.

- I don't care what your plans were. You're in Amityville.

We have a problem. We have a death toilet that needs to die.

- You know, Sebastian is dead.

You didn't tell me about Sebastian.

He just appears and now he's dead.

- Before you're gonna do anything else,

before your vacation you're gonna start,

you're staying in this town and you're solving this problem.

Don't tell me you can't do it.

- This is not a situation that I'm equipped-

- This is your expertise.

This is what you're known for. Kill this toilet.

Listen to me.

If it's a challenge, life is a challenge.

This death toilet is a challenge to our community.

I'll tell you right now.

If you can't kill this toilet,

I'm gonna flush you down a toilet,

and you'll never work again.

Get this done.

- Okay. Yes.

I'll give it another try.

Okay.

Yes, sir.

- I'll tell you.

Get it done, or there's gonna be one big flush in this town,

and it's gonna be you.

(phone clacks)

(Dump sighs)

Why did I wanna be Mayor Dump in the town?

Why am I facing these problems?

A death toilet in a town.

In a home, in this town.

Lord, lord, lord. We have to kill it.

We have to kill it.

(sighs) Why, why, why me?

(eerie music) (birds chirp)

(Greg sighs)

- All right.

Get yourself together, Greg.

Get yourself together.

My followers.

My followers, my followers.

My followers are gonna wanna see this.

They're gonna want to see this.

All right, Greg.

Get yourself together. All right.

Okay, guys.

Greg, checking in.

Sebastian is dead.

(Sebastian groans)

(intense string music)

(Sebastian screams)

Sebastian is definitely dead.

I owe it to you guys to continue this investigation,

this haunted inquiry, that is in question here.

I'm going to...

I've never experienced or walked in

on a full murder, a fresh kill.

It shook me. I'm shook.

I'm shook. If I'm going to...

I'm an empath. I'm a paranormal investigator.

I gotta do this. I gotta do this for my followers.

I have 199 followers, subscribers.

I just need that one more to smash that subscribe button,

and then I get to keep the URL.

Guys, follow me along, 'cause this is about to get real,

real, real, real.

So hit that like button, please.

I just need one more subscriber.

Just smash that subscribe button. I get to keep the URL.

I can keep the show on.

(chuckles) If I make it through this investigation.

I'm going back in, guys. Camera in tow.

I'm exhausted, I'm frightened, but for the viewers,

for my own satisfaction, I'm heading back in.

All right, don't forget to hit that like button,

smash that subscribe and let get to keep that URL.

(ominous music)

Otherworldly commode.

I'm ready for you.

What have you got? I'm protected.

Speak to me!

What have you got?

Talk to me! - Leave!

(Greg gasps) (intense string music)

Leave!

Leave!

(toilet laughs)

(toilet laughs)

Leave.

(toilet laughs)

- I'm not equipped for what's going on here,

but this is a different story.

I've never had to battle an actual haunted toilet

where the toilet is doing the killing.

I'm not equipped for this. I came alone.

I was on vacation. I'm not even supposed to be here.

I came at the behest of the mayor of the town,

and I came in hot, I did what I could here,

but I'm not equipped for this.

If I have to come back, I will. I'll come back, for sure.

But then I'll have to come back with my crew, with my gear,

with my tech, my lighting, all my industrial EVPs.

All my equipment's gotta come, but for now,

this is over my head.

This is over...

Just, I can't. It's too much for me.

This toilet is unique.

This toilet is obviously very special.

Not in the way you would think. Not in a good way.

There's something going on here.

So, I gotta get outta here.

You know, I've taken all I can take here.

This is Greg, the Ghost Hunter, signing off.

That's that. I'm out.

It's okay to admit that you've lost.

It's okay to admit you've been beaten.

It's okay. You're a ghost hunter.

It's okay. This isn't a ghost, this is something...

It's okay.

(prolonged flatulence) (ominous music)

(suspenseful music)

(prolonged flatulence)

(toilet flushes)

Oh, I'm outta here.

I'm outta here.

(flies buzz)

Whoa!

Whoa!

Geez!

(Greg grunts) (flies buzz)

(Greg grunts) (flies buzz)

(flesh squelches and crunches)

(Greg grunts)

(Greg grunts)

(flesh squelches and crunches)

(bird squawks)

(Greg grunts)

Whoa!

(Greg groans)

(Greg grunts) (birds squawk)

(Greg grunts) (birds squawk)

Whoa!

(dinosaur roars)

(Greg grunts) (birds squawk)

(music continues)

(water bubbles)

(Greg gasps and grunts)

(shark roars)

(water bubbles) (music continues)

(shark roars)

(shark roars)

(music continues)

Whoa, oh!

(Greg pants) (music continues)

(toilet flushes)

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

- [Toilet] Leave!

- I am trying to!

I'm trying!

I am trying to!

You won't let me go!

- [Toilet] Leave.

- You won't let me leave!

I'm trying to leave!

You won't let me leave!

(tense music continues)

(explosion roars)

(gentle wind music)

(tense orchestral music)

All right.

What to do. What to do.

All right. What to do.

Come on, Greg.

Get it together, baby.

You're a ghost hunter. You're a professional.

There's gotta be something we can do.

Crystal.

Crystal didn't work.

Crow's feather did not work.

There's gotta be a...

(warm orchestral music)

No, it can't be as simple as a Bible.

It can't be as simple as just a Bible.

(chuckles) The Bible. Okay.

It's good.

As good a choices as any.

(ominous orchestral music) (thunder thumps rhythmically)

(dramatic orchestral music)

(explosion roars) (Greg groans)

(Greg groans)

(flames crackle) (Greg grunts)

(explosion roars) (Greg grunts)

(Greg grunts)

(explosion roars) (Greg grunts)

(Greg grunts)

(explosion roars)

(Greg grunts) (explosions roar)

(explosion roars) (Greg growls)

(dinosaur snarls)

(explosions roar) (Greg grunts)

(Greg grunts)

(explosion roars) (Greg grunts)

(Greg groans)

(Greg grunts)

(explosion roars) (Greg grunts)

(Greg pants)

(Greg grunts)

(explosions roar) (Greg grunts)

(Greg grunts)

(shark growls)

(Greg gasps)

(thunder claps)

(flames crackle) (dramatic music continues)

(Greg pants)

(explosion roars)

(explosions roar) (Greg grunts)

(Greg screams)

I don't even know what I'm doing!

(Greg screams)

I don't have any idea of what I'm doing!

I can't fight it!

(Greg grunts)

- Leave! (Greg yelps)

(explosion roars)

(flames crackle) (dramatic music continues)

(explosion roars)

Leave.

(toilet laughs)

(explosions roar)

Leave.

(toilet laughs)

(explosions roar)

(toilet laughs)

(explosion roars)

Leave.

(explosion roars)

(flames crackle) (dramatic music continues)

Leave.

(toilet laughs)

(explosions roar)

(Greg screams) (explosion roars)

(explosions roar)

(explosion roars)

Leave.

(toilet laughs)

(explosion roars)

(explosion roars)

(horse neighs)

(explosion roars)

(thunder claps)

(explosions roar)

(air whooshes)

(flames crackle) (dramatic music continues)

(lid clacks)

(rousing orchestral music)

(Greg breathes heavily)

- All right, guys.

It looks like I've bit off a little bit more than I can chew

with this particular case.

I didn't, uh...

I didn't expect quite the battle.

But never, never have I experienced a battle with an actual,

an actual porcelain

inanimate object.

The thing was possessed. I apologize.

I didn't get any of it on camera.

It was an epic battle.

But I can assure you that the toilet

has surrendered to Greg the Ghost Hunter.

And I'm gonna come back and do a full investigation

on the whole home.

The whole kit and caboodle.

We're gonna dissect everything.

We're gonna get into the bowels.

We're gonna get into the plumbing.

But for now, I need to see if I can get comped

for my plane fair, for my rental car,

and I gotta tell ya, this little rental car,

since this was an emergency, it was pinner.

You know, a big guy like me, I can barely fit.

So, I'm signing off for now.

I'm coming back as soon as

my schedule clears up.

Greg the Ghost Hunter will be back at the Amityville house

very soon and we will do a complete dissectional

of the entire building,

the entire acreage, the basement.

We're gonna get into it.

Again, I apologize to all my viewers out there.

Please hit that like button, slam that subscribe.

I just need one more subscriber to keep my URL, guys.

And that is it. Greg the Ghost Hunter, out.

(warm orchestral music)

(ominous music)

- [Toilet] Leave!

- This is the call I wanted to get.

I got it from you, and you're telling me now.

Thank you. Thank you.

You're telling me now that the death toilet is dead.

There will be no more death flushing.

No more death crappers. You have solved this town's problem.

We didn't have too much room to maneuver,

and I thank you for getting it done.

This is what you are all about.

This is your expertise.

You found the toilet and you killed it. Thank you.

You are a hero. We might name a building for you.

Not only am I gonna name a building for you,

but you're gonna be my guest in this town,

as long as you wanna stay.

Do you wanna stay here a week?

I'll put you up at our best Holiday Inn in Amityville.

We'll feed you. You need to be rewarded.

This has saved our town.

You have made my life so much easier.

No more bad flushings of any toilets in Amityville, again.

You have exorcized the demon

that has been the death toilet in our town.

Thank you.

Oh, thank you. Thank you so much.

Again, thank you, from the bottom of my heart.

Every resident in this town thanks you.

Have a great journey.

Visit us again. Just thank you for saving our town.

(Dump sighs)

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

I've got a lot of people to thank.

I have a lot of people to thank.

I'm gonna write them all right now and thank them.

Melissa!

The crapper crisis is over.

The death toilet is dead. We need to celebrate.

Get a hold of every city council member,

and I need them here, tomorrow.

We're gonna celebrate. We're gonna have a little shindig.

A little crapper's dead shindig. Get the city council here.

Get the city manager here.

Oh, life is so much better than it was yesterday.

(keyboard clacks)

Oh, life is so much better.

(chair creaks)

(Dump clears his throat)

I'll tell ya. We've just saved our town.

We've saved my job.

We're gonna make a lot of money.

Tourists are gonna flock to Amityville.

It's gonna be good for us.

(prolonged flatulence) (Dump coughs and groans)

Whoa. I don't feel...

Whoa!

(flatulence) Woo! I need to take a crap.

Whoa, whoa.

I need to get to the crapper, quick.

Whoa.

Oh, my goodness. Oh, my goodness gracious.

(door slams)

(knife whooshes) (Dump screams)

(dramatic orchestral music)

(flames crackle) (dramatic music continues)

(dinosaur roars)

(dramatic music continues)

(dramatic music continues)

(gentle wind music)