Original subtitles

Boris Mikhaylovich, you know what to do.

Let's get out of here.

Guys, weapons at the ready.

Follow me.

They won't get in. I hope.

Fire in the hole!

Archimedes.

What about him?

He was supposedly killed by the Romans.

He was so engrossed by his calculations

that he didn't notice the approaching enemies.

And?

It's a beautiful death for a mathematician.

Let's go.

Come on.

Well…

I told you so.

You and your Archimedes!

Stay here. Seal the facility.

Let's go.

What problem was your Archimedes working on?

It's unknown.

According to the legend, he was writing on the sand,

and the wave washed it off.

Anna Nikolayevna, it's a long shot, but…

You're the only one here who has seen Fatum.

Maybe he is among them.

Strangely,

none of them was willing to surrender.

Yes.

There is always room for heroism.

You just need to stay away from that room.

THE MOP 2

POLICE

Tania. Hi.

Kolia.

Yes.

-It's you. -You're observant.

And talkative.

So, tell me, the observant and talkative one…

What do you want to hear?

That I look good in this electric blue suit.

What kind of color is that?

You look great in this suit of this color.

-About the case… -What about it?

Your case is closed.

Don't thank me.

I'm not going to.

I mean…

I mean I was ordered to close your case.

It's probably general Sosnovskiy's doing.

I didn't ask him to.

Maybe. It doesn't change anything.

The case is closed.

For now.

For now.

I mean it is closed or now.

Also, ta-ta for now.

Because I'm going to stay on this case unofficially.

Bye.

I'm telling Ania. I mean, she's my friend.

Katia, it's not what you're thinking.

I'm not thinking anything. I saw you kissing your ex.

Or was it you kissing the investigator?

First of all, I wasn't kissing anyone.

Second, she doesn't investigate me anymore.

The case is closed. Thanks to your dad, obviously.

Sometimes he is great, isn't he?

I wonder if you are allowed to kiss your former investigator.

Katia, enough.

Better tell me why you women

renamed color blue electric blue.

The stripe on your car is blue,

and your ex-investigator's suit is electric blue.

Now, the lipstick on your cheek is carmine red.

Or maybe fuchsia…

We have a body. Good morning.

Good morning.

Never mind.

Okay.

Kitty, kitty!

Yes, Vitia.

Hi. Innokentiy has run away.

Who?

Innokentiy with two Ns. Katia's cat.

A cat?

Katia's cat.

What are you doing there?

I wanted…

Anna Nikolayevna, can you come to Katia's house?

It's very important.

No. I can't right now.

What is this pregnant pause?

Vitia?

-All right, I'm coming. -Thank you.

Kitty, kitty!

Vitia.

I've been looking for you. What happened?

As I said, the cat ran away.

Katia is going to kill me.

Mitia warned me when he gave me the key.

About the cat, I mean.

And Katia.

Relax. Katia isn't going to kill you.

She's going to kill Mitia, and Mitia will kill you.

What did you need their key for?

I can't tell you, Anna Nikolayevna, or Dad will kill me, too.

Vitia. I'm going to kill you

if you don't explain what's going on.

We've been waiting for 40 minutes.

One could have died 100 times in this time.

Here we go again.

Hi.

Hi. What do we have here?

A body. The downstairs neighbor called us.

Her apartment was being flooded. She went upstairs and found him dead.

Who is he?

Our neighbor. Gosha.

Our Gosha is gone.

Stay here. Don't go anywhere.

-They need us as witnesses. -Probably.

What does the cat have to do with it? What did you want with Mitia's apartment?

-I took Mitia's keys. -Okay.

So that Yeva and I could… well…

What?

Well… do it.

It? Is it the only word in your vocabulary?

Anna Nikolayevna, you're a grownup. You're supposed to understand.

Vitia, you are a grownup.

You need to explain yourself.

I understand. I don't know why you couldn't have done it at home.

Because of you.

Lately you've always been at home.

I'm sorry that I've been at home.

Again, I'm sorry.

Wow.

Don't be jealous.

Is that what I think?

Knowing you, yes, it's exactly what you think.

I'll be able to say more after the postmortem.

Anyway, whoever she was, she took a good care of her nails.

Don't be jealous.

Easy to say.

By the way, the scratches are rather fresh.

It's not what killed him, though.

Yes.

Looks like he has been poisoned. With nitrates.

Or he stuffed himself with blueberries and died.

It's not funny.

I agree. There is nothing funny about it.

So? Did you do it?

No. Because of this cat.

I can't.

Why?

-He is watching us. -Who? God?

No, the cat.

Hey, shoo!

Go away!

Give me a second.

So where were we?

What do you mean?

Do something!

In a second.

I kicked him out.

-Can I take it? -Yes.

Yes, Mitia.

I'll kill him when I find him.

Easy, easy.

Look! Is it him?

Your Innokentiy.

Where?

Over there.

Come here.

Come here.

Easy. You'll get yourself killed.

Have you found his papers? Let me see.

Here.

Igor Mokretsky.

Single.

Of course he is. Wives don't do such things.

I mean they don't have nails like these.

-Are there cameras at the entrance? -No.

Mitia, go talk to the old ladies. They are better than any cameras.

Well, is it Innokentiy?

I don't know. I don't think so.

Why? Do you remember how he looks?

I don't know.

Who does, then? Maybe Yeva does. Where is she, by the way?

Gone.

Where?

I don't know.

I was nervous, and then Mitia called to say not to let the cat out.

He said it before, too.

So I got mad.

At whom? Mitia?

No, the cat, for running away.

Then Yeva got mad, too.

-At the cat? -No, at me, for going to look for him.

She didn't want to wait, so she left.

I see. Listen, I think he looks like him.

Yes. Let's give him back to Katia and go home.

What do you mean? She'll know it's not him.

You can tell your fishes apart.

Well… They are fishes.

Ok, wait. Don't let him go.

Gosha? He has dozens of girlfriends.

He'd bring home a new one almost every day.

A he-cat, that's who he was, God rest his soul.

Excuse me. Hello?

Mitia, hi. Can you send me the cat's picture?

Car? What cat?

Katia's Innokentiy.

The one where his face is visible.

Okay. Thanks, bye. I'll explain later.

Excuse me.

All in all, he was a decent guy. He'd always say hi.

No one ever saw him drunk.

Did you see him coming home yesterday?

Do you think we're watching him?

At two.

Nonsense! My show starts at 1:40 p.m.,

and he came right before it.

You're right.

-It was 1:30, then. -Yes.

Did you see anyone with him?

Are you kidding us? Of course we saw her.

The one with the mini skirt.

Come on. The mini skirt was in the morning.

The one before the show was with the hair dyed pink.

-Right, right. -Two girls at a time?

Not at a time, but one after the other.

Two girls at a time is lechery.

One after another is free relationship.

Makes sense.

Do you remember when they left? I mean, Mini Skirt and Pink Hair.

The Mini Skirt didn't stay long.

An hour, I think. Right?

Yes.

Petrovna and I had a good laugh. No pillow talk?

And Pink Hair?

Pink Hair? We didn't see her leaving.

-As I said, the show was starting. -Yes.

Maybe it's him and maybe it isn't.

No. This one's nose is orange, and this one has white nose.

The eyes are different, too.

He has a bushy tail, and this one is… bald.

-The marks look similar, but… -No.

-Not him? -Vitia, no. Keep looking.

Keep looking.

Look at this goon! Look at him.

It's a different kind. His nose is squashed.

Anna Nikolayevna, I think it's him.

No.

God, it's Garfield.

Is it him?

This is horrible. Look how mean he is!

Our cat was peaceful.

Is it him?

What color is he?

I think it's him.

He isn't ginger, Vitia.

-Does he look like him? -No.

Ours is small. Look.

I don't think we'll find him.

Okay. Thank you. Thanks a lot.

You're welcome.

-Bye. -Bye.

Your cat must have left because he was mad at you.

Left to some other neighborhood.

Yeva is mad at me, too. She won't take my calls.

Stop calling her.

Remember,

women like persistent men

and hate pushy ones.

It's like with a quadratic equation.

You find two solutions, then one,

and if you go on, you go into the complex plane.

Got it?

Anna Nikolayevna, I understand human language, too.

I guess.

Listen… Dad says love is like boxing:

you open up, you end up on the floor.

Funny.

Your dad is right, by the way.

In theory,

we can look at a person as a closed system.

In practice,

any system opening to another system loses energy.

The second law of love thermodynamics.

But even if Yeva doesn't want to talk, it doesn't mean you should die.

In the movies, people die of this.

In bad movies.

In good movies, they say that people die of love only in bad movies.

Also fifteen.

It appears our guy had tons of women.

Fifty-three, Mitia.

And it's just in the last six months.

-What do you mean? -We found his girlfriends list.

Come on. Fifty-three in six months? It means…

I've been wasting my life.

I mean, before I met you.

Right. The deceased was a true Casanova.

He would review every woman by fifteen parameters.

Yesterday, he had two dates.

-Simultaneously? -No, by turns.

Because two girls at a time is lechery. One after another is free relationship.

That's what the old ladies said.

What else did they say?

Okay… They said the first girl wearing a mini skirt entered at 11 a.m.

and stayed for about an hour.

The other one, with pink hair, came in around 1:30.

Preliminary time of death is between 2 and 4 p.m.

I'll be able to be more specific after the postmortem.

When did Pink Hair leave?

We don't know. Their show was starting.

TV shows are evil.

-What was he doing for the living? -Life coaching. That's what it says.

Nothing, then. At least now we know where he found women.

I chose the wrong profession.

At least you weren't killed, Mitia.

Not yet.

Kitty, kitty!

Enough, Vitia. Enough of cat meditations.

It's time to cry and repent.

She doesn't pick up the phone.

I don't mean Yeva, as you must understand.

We have to confess to Katia.

But probably to Mitia first.

Yes?

Okay. We'll be there.

Was it Mitia?

No, your father. You got lucky.

They have a body, and they need our help. Let's go.

Let's hope one dead body is enough for them.

By the way, we're going to tell your dad everything, Vitia. Right?

These index card are no use. Not a single picture!

The weird part is that there are no names here, only…

What do they call it?

-Nicknames, Grandpa Nikolay. -Thank you.

But there are 15 parameters for each one.

Creep.

He deserved to be poisoned, Grandpa Kolia.

I agree.

I'd like to know who Pink Hair and Mini Skirt are.

Anna Nikolayevna.

Has it ever happened to you?

What?

This? No.

I don't think so.

Why?

Someone was always in the way. A cat or someone else.

Anna Nikolayevna, come on. I'm serious.

I'm sorry. Seriously speaking,

I believe a relationship

is like an error matrix for statistical tests.

A chart of four different combinations for predicted and actual values.

It's good when two persons are a match. It's a true positive.

Get out of here!

But when they don't match it's also good.

It's called true negatives.

-What about you and dad? -What about us?

You are…

We're fine,

and I hope it's not a statistical error.

Why didn't you take it?

I don't know how to explain it.

It's like an ellipse.

A simple shape that can't be expressed through elementary functions.

Yes. Sometimes it's hard to translate from mathematese into a human language.

-Let's call it a classic type I error. -Type I.

Okay.

Here.

What can you tell us, Katia?

Well, inside he looks more or less like a normal human.

I'll tell you the rest tomorrow, after the tests.

Judging by the date, this is our Don Juan's last meal.

The Geraldi restaurant.

Can you figure out if he was alone?

It's unclear. Pickled fennel salad, burrata with bottarga…

I wouldn't eat it if they paid me. Pickled fennel?

Fennel means dill.

Dill for 1,500?

-Mitia, you're going to this restaurant. -Now?

Yes, Mitia, now.

Cool. I'll see the people who call dill fennel.

Buy cat food, please.

At the restaurant?

At a store. Not dry but wet, okay?

Good thing the cat doesn't eat fennel.

Here he is.

Are you joining us?

Kolia said there was some index.

There is. He is in the office with Katia.

What about you?

I'm doing the hardest part, as always. Also, buying food for the cat.

Speaking about the cat…

Mitia, you see…

I can't be certain until I run the tests,

but the preliminary conclusion is, as I said, a nitrate poisoning.

Who was poisoned? Hi.

Hi. Someone who wasn't normal.

Ania, tell us how norm isn't a mathematical notion.

First of all, hello, Nikolay.

Hi.

Second, speaking about norm, it is a completely mathematical notion.

In mathematics, a norm is a function

from a real or complex vector space to the nonnegative real numbers

that behaves in certain ways.

Ania, I love you a lot, but please. It has been a long day.

Besides, there is Euclid's norm and Manhattan norm.

Ania.

I'm sorry but since you value your cat above your baby's father…

-What's wrong with Kesha? -That's what I'm talking about.

Innokentiy is fine.

-He's screwing Masha from downstairs. -Mitia.

I mean he is making love to his beloved gray cat.

Don't worry, it's the fourth time he has escaped.

I don't know how he does it.

The first time I had been looking for him for hours

before the neighbors brought him back.

By the way, have you found the killer?

Me? I don't even know who the victim is.

A guy who…

coupled with 53 women.

-Pardon the language. -I'm not a child.

He had a card with 15 parameters for each woman.

Maybe it's love. Like Innokentiy and Masha.

Speaking about love.

Vitia and I have been thinking about love in the mathematical sense.

Love is when she prefers you to the cat.

Mitia. Please.

Everyone, please, let's get back to work.

Katia, please brief Ania.

Mitia. To the restaurant.

I want to be a cat in my next life. A ginger cat.

Ania, please think of something.

Sine, cosine, tangent, cotangent.

Is everything okay?

Everything is great.

Where are you going?

It's work. I'll call you.

Ania.

We have two suspects so far.

I see.

If you expect me to tell you who the killer is, I can't.

What I can do is a cluster analysis of spatial distribution density.

Can we?

Tell me about the poisoner.

She has either a mini skirt or pink hair.

These aren't mathematical terms.

Anna Nikolayevna means a profile.

You know, like in the movies.

Okay.

All right. She is smart. Cruel.

Probably vulnerable.

Interesting.

It's a nonstandard combination. You can help.

Anything else?

I think she has some discontent.

Mental, maybe even physical. I don't know how to explain.

It's like the ellipse.

A seemingly simple shape, but…

…you can't express its perimeter through elementary functions.

Sometimes things that are hard to express in human language

are easily formulated through mathematics.

Okay, we'll try.

I think we can use Fourier's series.

That's right. Fourier. We could.

We even should.

Meanwhile, I'll go buy some meat.

For the cat?

No. For Mitia.

Sometimes things that are hard to express in human language

are easily formulated through a good meal.

Bye.

Okay.

I'll try the cluster analysis, and you go with Fourier.

Where are you going?

To work.

What time is it? It's morning.

Ania, will you translate it for me?

There is nothing to translate.

I'm trying to analyze these three parameters.

Why three? There were 15 on the cards.

Yes. Mokretsky used 15 parameters,

but he didn't have enough women.

Not enough?

Yes. For 15-dimensions vectors you need

at least coupe thousand girls.

Anyway, I used the main component method,

singular decomposition of the feature matrix,

and according to the Kaiser rule

the three components

that give us 94.3% of explained dispersion…

Ania, the only thing I understood from what you've just said

is that it's almost 100%, right?

Right. But it doesn't matter.

What does?

What matters is that it doesn't work.

What does?

Nothing.

Neither time series

nor power spectrum density

or Fourier's series

or the Hamming window.

Nothing.

So there.

Ania.

Why don't I make us coffee?

We'll sit down and you'll explain it to me in a human language.

Because…

In a human language…

You see, all these women have…

I mean, the Mokretsky-women system has periodicity.

If you see them not as women but as an assemblage of numbers

or, say, vectors…

Remember… in prison, when you arrested me…

Ania, it was a holding cell, not prison.

It doesn't matter.

I explained to you then what an outlier is.

This is the solution.

It's an outlier.

I remember.

You were also talking about harmonious and unharmonious murders.

That's when I fell in love with you.

Yes. Mathematics lies in the basis of this world.

You can call it harmony, but it is mathematics.

The world is harmonious, and the people aren't.

They are different. Criminals, serial killers.

They make this world inharmonious. They break the laws.

Your criminal laws and, more importantly, the laws of mathematics.

Here…

we have another outlier.

That's why I mentioned periodicity.

Okay, look. The calendar. Days of the week, seasons.

Spring, summer, autumn, and winter.

They are harmonious. They come every year.

And here, it's like someone took away the winter.

You're right.

You're absolutely right, Ania. In everything.

Your mathematics is right.

I took away the winter.

I don't know why I did it. I mean I know why I did it.

It's… my ex-wife. Vitia's mother.

Well, it doesn't say that it's Vitia's mother.

But we had been married for ten years.

I just didn't want you to know. The past should stay in the past.

Ania, I'm sorry.

I didn't know it would interfere with your calculations.

I don't know how to explain it.

In human language.

It's like the ellipse's perimeter.

It's hard to express the ellipse's perimeter

through elementary functions.

That's what Vitia said.

That's what it is.

He is right…

your son.

Okay. You need to go to work.

And I need to…

You want to be alone?

Yes, I need to finish the calculations.

Have you found her?

Whom?

Your wife.

My ex-wife, Ania. Yes, I have.

She wasn't in this city at the time of the murder. She has an alibi.

She only met this Mokretsky once, by accident.

I know what you're going to say. There is no such thing.

But believe me, it was an accident.

It's good that you told me. It will help my calculations.

I'm sorry.

I really don't know how to explain it all.

Sometimes it's hard to say things

in a human language.

It's ill fit for it.

Good thing that there are other languages.

And you.

Yes?

Katia, hi. Do you have anything?

Hi. I don't have the final lab results yet.

But according to the preliminary ones, Mokretsky might have suffered

from methemoglobinemia.

What?

Just don't tell me, Katia,

that he had all these women because of your meta-something.

It's not mine, thank God.

But it's a disease, and he could have died because of it.

Permission to report.

I've just been to the restaurant.

I didn't make it yesterday because of the traffic.

Hi.

Anyway, five more people also had a fennel poisoning on that day.

-Five more bodies? -No.

Fennel?

Pardon my French. I meant dill.

They just had the runs, pardon my French again.

Please give me more details.

About the runs?

The restaurant has already conducted its own investigation.

Anyway, their chef, a Frenchman or a Tajik, I'm not sure,

accidentally filled the salt shaker with saltpeter.

Here goes your nitrate poisoning.

Why did everybody just have the runs and our guy died?

Karma. Fifty-three women in six months.

Mitia, come on. He was supposed to live till he were 400.

I started telling you.

It's methemoglobin reduction enzyme deficiency.

The amount of nitrates that didn't do much harm to others proved fatal for him.

I'm telling you, it's karma. Fifty-three women…

Mitia. First of all, shut up. Second, it's in six months.

Besides, there were traces of tadalafil and sildenafil in his system.

-What? -A selective inhibitor.

Known to you as Viagra.

Thank God. He was giving me an inferiority complex.

In his case, the Viagra could have intensified the nitrates' effect.

There is something I don't understand. How could he make such a mistake?

Accidentally, I suppose. The sacks were next to each other.

The taste is similar.

Saltpeter is less salty, so you add more.

So we can close the case.

Yes, but let's wait for the methemoglobin reduction enzyme test results.

Let's.

Yes, Tania.

Okay, send her in.

-Smart girl. -Aren't I?

She came. The girl with pink hair.

Good morning.

How are we doing?

I've solved it.

What do you mean? What is it?

What was it about? You've been working on it all night.

Just…

Nothing.

Nothing serious.

What's wrong with you?

Why do you stare at me like this? Do you hate my hair?

We were looking for you.

We're happy to see you.

I realize I shouldn't have run away from his apartment, of course.

Let's start from the beginning.

How long have you known Mokretsky?

About three years.

We all need to do it from time to time… to stay healthy.

Did you know he dated other women?

Of course. I didn't care.

I was happy with the arrangement up until the day when…

What happened on that day?

He died.

Could you be more specific?

On that day we came to his place, as usual, and had sex.

Then I went to the bathroom but came back for my phone,

and he was dead.

And then?

Then I got scared and ran away.

And you forgot to turn off the tap.

Yes.

Well… I had other things on my mind.

Anna Nikolayevna, water?

No, I'm okay.

I just need to lie down.

I didn't have enough sleep.

I need some rest, and it'll pass.

Anna Nikolayevna, I meant to tell you.

Yeva and I have made up.

Everything's fine. So it's over.

No, I think it's just the beginning.

It's good that you have made up.

Vitia, tell me… Do you use protection?

Of course.

I mean we haven't used it yet, but I always have it on me.

I'm not an idiot.

It's good thing someone isn't.

What do you mean?

Right.

What are you doing, Nikolay?

Why did I say that?

You idiot! And so am I.

I don't remember if I took my pills today.

Okay, the distribution of the probability of pregnancy in relation to the cycle

is subjected to G-distribution.

You can't calculate the probability in an elementary function.

To hell with elementary functions.

God, don't stop. Yes!

Yes!

Yes…

What did you mean, Anna Nikolayevna?

What time is it?

Yes, I can make it.

Will you be at home?

Yes. Why?

I'll just go out for a quick errand.

Thanks.

Okay, bye. Bye.

-The test results are back. -And?

As I thought, he had a congenital methemoglobinemia.

So, an accident.

Yes. We can close the case.

Thank you.

-Can I go now? -Yes.

I'll sign your pass card.

I'm sorry for your loss. We apologize.

Goodbye.

When is Igor's funeral?

Do you want to come?

I guess.

At least one of his girlfriends should be there to mourn the bastard.

We'll let you know.

Thank you.

It's her right.

Do you need help?

No, thanks.

Here it is. I need one of these. With a 100% guarantee.

Miss, you realize that no test can give you a 100% accuracy?

You mean the probability?

Yes. These are made in Germany, 98% accuracy.

These are locally made, 95%.

So I recommend this one.

Okay. Give me… the locally made. Two.

-Are you a patriot? -A mathematician.

Some mathematicians are women, and they sometimes get pregnant.

I understand that. What I don't understand is…

-The probability? -Yes.

It's simple.

The probability of the German test making a mistake is 2%.

The probability of two cheap ones both making a mistake

is 0.1, or 1%.

Listen, I took 15 tests when I got pregnant the first time.

They were all negative.

You are a mathematician. You are supposed to be logical.

Maybe.

If you need a test, I'm sorry but it means that you…

Didn't use protection? Yes.

Yes, I'm a mathematician, but I'm also a woman.

As for women's logic, it's simple. It doesn't exist.

Thank God that it doesn't.

Well…

Two lines on a plane either are congruent,

or meet,

or are parallel to each other.