Original subtitles

Used all my options, worked off my dues.

Played all the cards, now there's nothing to lose.

Don't want tomorrow to be like today.

That's why I'm breaking away.

Not trying to run, not trying to hide.

What can I win if I'm losing my pride?

Won't let tomorrow be like today.

Why I'm breaking away.

Breaking away.

Got to find a better way.

She loves me.

She loves me not.

Oh, no, she loves me again.

Are you all right, Dennis? Yeah, I'm wonderful.

Yeah, you seem a bit down in the dust, man.

Oh, full of the joys of spring, I am, Odd. Oh, no, no, that's what you say,

but I can see different, man.

I mean, I can tell, look where they are laying them bricks. I mean, you're not a

happy man, Dennis, man.

You're listless.

It's the same with me budgie back home. Tommy, I mean, if he's not nutting seven

colours out that bell, well, now there's something wrong.

Oh, aye, you know, Den, you can learn a lot about human nature, you know, by

studying budgies.

Really? Yeah.

Right, er, suppose I was feeling a bit down in the beak.

Yeah. What do you do for budgie that you could do for me?

Huh?

Well, I mean, it varies, doesn't it? I mean, er, you know, sometimes I'll give

him a nice bit. Cuttlefish to peck at.

Or we'll shift these mirror around the cage a bit, you know, give them a bit of

change of season. That usually does the trick. Well, that doesn't kind of work

with me.

No, no, I don't suppose so.

Yeah, is this an official strike or what?

I'm just trying to cheer you all dead up, my love. I don't need cheering up,

thank you very much, Oz.

And as for you and your budgie, about the only thing we've got in common is

we're both sick of seeing your face through the bars of our kids.

Now,

that's not a depressed punter. You know...

What are you doing?

Vera, man. I know it's Vera, man. I'm just trying to find out what's going on,

man.

What's the matter with you two, eh?

It's just us, man. Dennis is a bit concerned about you, that's all.

Look, are you going back to England or are you not, that's all? What's that got

to do with you?

Well, you're my mate, aren't you? I mean, eh...

I just want to know what you're going to do before I decide what I'm going to

do. I mean, I don't want to be stuck on me jack in Germany working here if all

me mates have went home. I'm sure you're really concerned about you.

You're not concerned about me at all.

Look, I'll tell you exactly what I told Vera, right? I'll make my mind up at the

end of the week. And when I do, it's what's best for me that matters, right?

for Vera or for Dagmar or for you or for your flipping budgie.

For once in my life... I'm putting my interests first, okay?

Well, could you let me know by Thursday?

Are

you

all right, boy?

Yeah, terrific. Why?

Oh, no, no, no reason.

I'm just intrigued to know why the person who buys each bag is going to

with an inscribed skirt involved, that's all.

It's not for Ria Barry, it's for Krista. Oh, Krista!

So it's true then, is it? Yeah, yeah, it's true. There's no need to sound so

triumphant about it. I'm not going to hide anything, at least of all the six

foot piece of timber.

My, I say, Wayne, there is a highly original love token, that is.

A plank.

Aye, aye, Boxer.

No heart -shaped token for Wayne's girl, aye. Only the finest piece of skirting

board will survive.

Oh, well, I suppose there's one way of starting an arm together.

You're taking the Euro on, son.

Oh, well, you've got to admit it, mate.

It must have been a bit strange coming from you, mate.

I thought you were the woman leaving, mate.

John. Jump them and leave them, right? Now, that's the difference, Steve.

Instead of carving notches, I'm now carving names, aren't I?

Hello.

Hello.

Oh, hello,

Trimble. We were so busy that we didn't see you come in for a minute.

Could you stop working for a moment, please?

Oh, yes, please.

Thank you.

Now, I have to talk to all the British workers about the new labor regulations.

So, could you and your colleagues come to my office at one quarter of an hour

before the lunch break, please?

Well, gentlemen, as you probably know, there have been one or two changes in

federal government's attitude to Gustav Biden, the visiting worker.

This is because of increasing unemployment here in West Germany.

Oh, yes, we have it too.

Our brand is bigger than yours.

So, we have had to look at ways of keeping more jobs for our own people.

Up until now, you have worked here without paying tax or insurance.

And that has been very convenient for all of us, yeah?

But from next Monday, if you wish to stay and work here in Germany, you

will have to apply for official registration and be issued with a

Yeah, does that mean we've got to give up our British nationality? Because I'm

buggered if I'm becoming a German.

No, no, no, you do not understand.

As members of the EEC, you have the right to work here, but from now, you

accept your financial obligations to the German state.

Well, can we not just grasp here and then send what tax home?

Don't be ridiculous, though. I'm not being ridiculous.

I just think it's a bit strong with we give Germany all our skill and labour

now it's trying to issue us with dog licenses and take what little pittance

money we earn off us.

Just ignore him, Herr Grunwald.

So, if you could let me know as soon as possible if you wish to stay or not, we

can get on with the paperwork.

I can let you know straight away, Herr Grunwald. I'm going back to England.

Me too, Herr Grunwald.

Family calls.

I shall be sorry to see both of you go.

Anyone else?

Personally, I'm not quite sure yet, Herr Grunwald.

No, me neither.

And what about you, Mr Paddle?

I haven't decided yet, Herr Grumwald.

Well, it looks as if no one will be staying here.

I wouldn't be too sure about that, Herr Grumwald.

Well, this is a right puzzle, this one.

I don't want to go back home, but I don't really want to stop here working

Germany, especially if I'm just going to be working with Germans.

I thought she had a wife and her kids, I was.

That's why he doesn't want to go back.

True, true.

What about you, Moxie? You'll stop your others, won't you?

Much as I like her, I can't say I relish the idea of paying tax -like.

I mean, when you think about the squalid lifestyle that we lead at the moment,

it's going to be even worse with less money.

Sounds like another boy blighty -bound to me.

No way, Bob.

There's even less chance of that happening.

How's that like?

Huh? Look at her record, haven't I?

Oh, right. Yeah, I was in the nick for two years before I come out here.

Yeah? This was supposed to be me fresh start in life.

Oh, what did you get locked up for?

Huh?

Arson. Arson? Yeah, I know. I didn't want to tell you blokes, you know.

Arson? She got worried, like, you know, about being in the same hut as me, like.

But it don't matter now, though.

Arson, huh?

And you don't even smoke.

How did that come about, Marks?

I was working on this building site, you know, back in Liverpool.

Back to the site manager.

Had it in for us, like kept talking my wages for no reason.

Well, one day, you know, I just lost my rag.

I set fire to his hut.

What, was he still in it?

Not for long, no.

So there you go.

Record for arson.

Dog City address.

Where? Kirby.

I reckon my chances on Merseyside are even worse than Everton.

I see what you mean.

Well, stop on, Moxie. That's the only thing you can do, really.

Yeah, I know, Oz, but, you know, once they get me named down on their forms

their files, it'll only be a matter of time before they find out about me, Pat.

Hey, Dennis, you'll never guess what.

Moxie's an arsonist. Schnaps.

Just leave the button.

I'd forgotten all about it till he asked.

Yeah? Well, he was lucky I reminded you then, wasn't it, eh?

I mean, imagine what the scene would have been this coming Saturday, right?

You and Brenda locked passionately on the sofa together over a nice cup of

cocoa, eh?

Unable to control your ardour any longer, you slip off your pyjama jacket

well, look, Brenda's cries wake up half a bloody Tyneside, eh?

You've got five days to work out a good story, haven't you?

Whatever I tell her, she's not going to believe it, though, is she?

Have you finished yet?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just wanted to get a rough idea, you know.

What is it you're making, anyway?

Sort of a commemorative plaque, I suppose, you know.

Two arts intertwined forever.

Wayne and Christa.

A bit like Marks and Sparks or Neville and Lottie.

Look, instead of making tactless jokes, Wayne, why can't you use your rancid

imagination to help me find an explanation for this?

Yeah, you're right.

Let me think.

Oh, yeah, what about this? What about it was your first night out here, right?

You underestimated the strength of German beer, got pissed out your brains,

up in the morning buff with that on your arm.

That's no good. That's the truth.

Oh,

thanks a bunch, Wayne.

Any time, soldier.

Not really, Barry, thank you. Oh, no, no, no. Now you're going home, don't

forget about your little, you know, your little T -I -double -T -double -R, will

you? Barry, get S -T -U -double -F -E -D, will you?

Show me.

Ah, don't take offence, Barry.

There's a lot of chickens going home to roost this week.

Pressure's on, mate.

See, we've been in our own private cocoon here for six months.

Now real life's howling at the door again.

You know something, Ray?

There's a real serenity and wisdom about you these days, you know.

Yeah, well, it's the power of love, isn't it, Barry?

Yeah, I suppose it is, yeah.

What's it feel like?

Love, I mean, being in love.

Well, I don't really sparkle in that department, see, between you and me.

I ain't any other adjacent one either.

I'm the sort of bloke who looks at the three -year expiry dates with a packet

johnnies and wonder if I ever use them in time.

Hey, come on.

Your time will come, mate.

And you'll know when it hits you, I tell you.

Yeah.

What's it feel like?

What's it feel like?

Love is... Love is sitting in a hut on a German building site, carving two names

into a plank of wood without feeling a prat about it.

Now, I know I've been pretty viperish in the past with your concern, Wayne, but

that's... That was almost poetry.

Hold the book. I contributed to a German hut to be a charity fund.

And instead of one of them little flags from me lapel, they put this tattoo on

me arm. Oh, very ingenious. Even Brenda would see through that very deal, man.

I thought Dennis could come up with something.

Not a chance.

What's got into him?

I don't know, but he's certainly taken hold.

I'll have a word with him. He's talking to me. Just stop right where you are,

Oz. Come on, Den, we're your mates.

Whatever it is, share it with us.

Trouble shared's a trouble halved, eh?

No, that was one of Vera's favourite scenes, that was.

Come on, then.

Snap out of it, man. Snap out of it. Will you listen to this, lad, eh?

Have you lot any idea what it's like being kicked out of a marriage?

It's like being asked to take down all those walls we've been building, brick

brick, with your bare hands.

Imagine what that feels like, eh?

And then imagine what it would be like if they came along and said, right, now

put them all back up again.

We can help you then.

Thanks for the offer, bummer, but you can't. I'll help you with your problems.

Doesn't work the other way around.

That's how it is.

Do all of you. Just do me the only favour you can, will you?

Just leave me alone.

Na, meine Damen, hättet ihr Lust, was zu trinken heute Abend?

Nein, danke, wir haben schon was anderes vor.

Aber komm schon, sie werden euch nicht beißen.

Nein, wirklich nicht.

Ja, ja, so beschäftigt mit den verdammten Engländern.

You've got to see how desperate I am when I'm asking you, man. That's

to be flattery, is it, Oz? Supposed to melt my heart, is it? Well, I'm sorry,

it's not going to.

Hey, dear, you're wasting your time, you know. You won't get him to change his

mind. But what about you, Moxie? Do you not fancy... I'm sorry, Oz, but I've got

a face for whether I don't have an extradition treaty with Britain.

Yeah, well, try the Antarctic, eh? Why don't you? Somebody that lights fires

will be popular up there.

Bloody Germans. Why couldn't I just leave well alone, eh?

Morning, ladies.

Hello, Wayne.

Good morning, Wayne.

Erm... I bought you a little something.

Oh.

Beautiful. You made it yourself, yeah? Yeah, well, you know, my union card, it

says join it, but I'm a sculptor, really.

Dagmar, look, Weynard made me a paperweight.

Very nice.

No, no, no, it's not a paperweight.

It's a plaque, isn't it?

You know, you're supposed to put it on the wall, like, above your bed, like.

What?

Cool. Very nice there.

It's all right then, isn't it?

I want to fill in one of those forms as well, if you'd give us any.

Which forms?

The work permits, you know.

What do you call them?

Your staying?

Well, about the only one who is by the look of it, eh?

Of course, a couple of lads haven't quite made their minds up yet, you know.

Erm... You want me to, um, to write for you, yeah?

Yeah, please, if you would, love. My German never got much past Donner and

Blitzen.

OK.

Please, your full name.

Look, you do know why I'm doing this, don't you?

I think I can guess.

Right.

Wayne Winston Norris.

Well, I still say we're being tricked like shit.

I mean, Germany takes us on as cheap labour when their going's good, right?

then what happens?

It cuts up a bit rough for them and wallop. They want to dump us overboard,

don't they? And it's just so their dole figures look all right.

We're not being dumped, Oz. Yeah.

We're being invited to stop them if we pay their tax or so.

If we don't, they'll let one of their lads have our jobs. It's quite fair

enough. Fair?

The words fair and German don't go together in my book, pal.

I've heard you going on about English since back home, man, Oz.

Mourning away about the Irish coming over and taking jobs off our lads and

paying the tax.

It's exactly the same here.

Only over here we're the Irish and the Germans are the English.

Well, they're right about one thing, Niddle.

The English have become the Irish of Europe.

No, he's wrong there, Oz. What?

The Turks are the Irish of Europe.

How can the Turks be the Irish of Europe when Turkey's not even in Europe, you

duck egg? It's in Asia, man.

All right.

So how come they think of the Eurovision Song Contest, then?

Well, so do Israel, don't they? They're even farther out of Europe than Turkey.

If you ask me, I think they're more like the gypsies of Europe.

Oh,

trapping the land in search of employment. Yes, except that the gypo

gruff, didn't he?

Ah, you are ridiculous, Oz.

I'm ridiculous, get this? I'm ridiculous.

You're the one stood there with his arm stuck out, hoping the sun will make his

tattoo go away.

That's very interesting, this is.

Yeah, it could have filled me.

What is?

This, this dissension in the lower ranks.

Oh, it's a sure sign that we're missing our tribal lady, you know.

I read about it in the Naked Ape.

There's this group of chimpanzees, right?

And I was suddenly deprived of their elder stage chimp, with the result that

rest of them took part in several days of fierce squabbling, right?

That's what's happening here.

We may not know it, but this is a primitive leadership struggle to see who

succeeds Dennis.

Marty, don't take this the wrong way, will you? But why don't you go and boil

your head?

I think I was just made the first bit for the job.

Two o 'clock.

Work on your heads, everybody.

There's no hurry.

Oh, hey, what a day.

Shut up.

All right, here I go.

When's it on, then, Art?

Yeah. Got to put it up with you, haven't I?

Oh, cheers. It's his charm that knocks me out, you know.

How's a cup of tea, now?

You know what, Ned?

He's getting really bossy these days, isn't he?

Hey, I reckon it's Barry's Planet of the Apes theory's gone to his head. Yeah.

Oh, wait, man, just pour the tea. Yeah, of course, the advantage of being a

chippy is you don't have to work in the hot sun all day, you know.

I'll be embodied with all this pullover, you know. He's got them convicts for

missing Denison's leadership.

Yeah, yeah, look, come on, what are we going to do about him, eh?

I mean, we've all lent on him enough for the past six months. It's time we gave

the old poor sod an end.

Oh, that's just the trouble, though. He'll not let her.

Maybe he doesn't pride her.

Maybe he just don't trust her.

Just to avoid any more embarrassing scenes, I, uh, I shan't be going over

club tonight.

I'm going down to the town to get the legless.

So you lot will be safe where you are.

I reckon instead of examining our behaviour, Professor bloody Barry should

a look at him.

Never seen a man so withdrawn.

He's not a nice sort of mate.

Why?

Maybe you should pool your knowledge of budgies with Barry's knowledge of

chimps. Between you, you might come up with a solution.

There's no need for that then. I'm just trying to... Oh, isn't there?

Seems to me you couldn't care less about Dennis.

I could, I could.

All right,

all right, I'll prove it then.

Same thing as you, by the looks of it, getting pissed.

Hey, you, get back.

Come on. Get back.

Join me, why don't you?

Thanks.

I thought you were out in the country avoiding the law.

I'm not letting any foxy German cop keep me out of town, you know.

Thought I'd just lie low for a couple of days, avoid the construction sites,

like, you know, might be a marked man, like.

That's a reasonable assumption in the circumstances.

So what you doing for doubts, Marks, didn't you?

Couldn't have got much for our dartboard.

Ah, I'm sorry about that.

Hey, I left the darts though, didn't I?

Oh, you're stupid.

I'll keep the tray here with you.

I just, you know, put it on the outside.

I don't understand.

Keep what this should do us for a while then, eh?

Bloody hell, McGowan.

Another one?

Good thing a drink with you, McGowan, eh?

You get good service.

So what are you actually doing?

I'm working as a bouncer, you know, at this gay nightclub.

Any of them etiquettes get out of order.

You know, I have to... Drag them.

Yeah, that's right, drag them down the stairs, not kick them into the alley.

Is it voluntary work like, eh? 20 quid a night, like, and all I can drink.

It must cost nearly 100 pound a night then, eh?

Listen, Charlie, I'm only drinking with you because you're the bread. Don't take

the pit, OK? Otherwise they treat you just the same as they do the customers.

Oh, they've got customers in here, do they? I'm surprised you haven't broken

them all off.

Right, as soon as I finish this lot, I'm going to give you a thump. Ah, thump,

thump, thump away. Why do I care? I'm going.

You're tired of life. Ah, you could say that.

Sounds like a couple of addicts asking for trouble if you ask

me. Just get out of this, McGone. I'll handle it.

Go home with your wife.

Maybe I'll have Dagmar.

Sounds like he's provoking you. Do you want me to sort him out for you? You

stay out of this, McClurey. I'll handle it.

You're not hard enough for this, Jody. Oh, no.

and be all right?

Aye. Aye, they've just sedated him.

Had to give him a blood transfusion.

Over two litres.

It's a good job that ambulance got there so quick.

What happened, for God's sake?

Oh, there was a bit of a rumble in this vehicle with some German lads.

McGowan turned up.

Oh, he's got his arm slashed with a beer glass.

McGowan, I might have known. That man could start a fight in an empty house.

And I'll get him far behind.

Oh, you've got it wrong, Neville.

It's my fault.

I started out with Trump.

You did?

Aye.

Doctor,

this is one of Mr Osborne's colleagues, Neville Hope.

Hello. How do you do, Doctor?

Your friend is a very lucky man.

Aye, I know.

We're very grateful for what you've done.

Don't thank me for doing my job, Mr Hope.

Guten Abend.

Alles gut? Alles gut.

I just wish you men could settle arguments without resorting to violence.

That isn't typical, Doctor.

I see a lot of people injured in stupid, drunken fights about football or women.

Yeah.

Is he going to be all right, then?

Oh, yes.

He's lost a lot of blood, but that's been replaced.

And I've given him a sedative to help him rest.

And fortunately, the wound isn't too large.

He'll have a scar, of course.

But if he wishes, that can be put right.

Put right?

Yes.

Cosmetic surgery, skin graft, whatever.

I hope you don't mind me asking, Doctor, but while you're here, is there

anything I can do about this?

Look, Neville, I just don't think this is the right place at the time. What

would you mind, Dennis?

And I've got to do something about it.

Who is Lottie?

I don't know.

But it's not the wife.

That's just the trouble.

So, this is an unwanted souvenir of your time in Germany.

Very much unwanted.

I've already lied to the wife once about it.

I bandaged it up and told her it was an injury.

Well, I can't keep doing that all my life, can I?

Oh, I'm sure he'll be all right. Yeah, strong as the knocks. Yeah, I mean, if

anything was really bad, we'd have heard about it already, wouldn't we?

Yeah, I know, but, you know, all the same, though, it just seems a bit

incongruous, like, you know, us being in hospital, you know, beaten up.

All right, Nev's back.

Wait, what's the word then, Nev?

Couldn't do anything.

Oh, God.

Unbelievable.

What? No, for me tattoo, not for us.

No, us, it's fate.

Very comfortable out of danger.

Believe that, Nev.

You had us all going there. Yeah, right, right. And who wants to be back to your

poxing, napping tattoo, Nev? I'm sorry.

I was just a bit preoccupied.

Yeah, well, you know, what happened, Leith?

Well, this lady doctor said I should stop being so pathetic and just tell

straight. The whole relationship was sound, you understand?

Neville, Neville, how about if we pulled your arm off some? Would that solve the

problem, eh? As odds, for Christ's sake.

Well, it seems you've followed Dan down to the beer killer.

Kind of garden him like.

Anyway, there was a bit I grew, and he got his arms flat with a glass.

All right, give me the beer, please.

Funny thing was, Dennis said it was his fault, not others, that he started the

rook. Yeah,

it's true, bummer.

Because of me, Oz was nearly killed.

I don't care.

I've acted like the right prick.

You know, these last few days, and, uh... wallowing in me own problems and

shooting all you lads out and that, and, uh... Well, I'll apologise to Oz when

he's feeling better, like, but in the meantime, I've got a lot of apologies to

make, and you lads will do for a start, like... I'm sorry.

Come on, you bad -tempered old bastard.

Buy us all a drink.

Good morning.

I'm sorry to hear about us.

Yeah, yeah, me too.

Look, can I see you this evening? I think we should have a chat.

Yes, I know.

Well, this is hardly the time of place, is it?

All right.

Come to the flat at seven?

Well, won't your mother be there?

I can always go out on a train, can't I?

All right, great.

Seven o 'clock, OK?

Look, I've got dust because we're a bit sore without those.

See you later.

Oh, yeah.

So I was listening, eh?

Playing 349.

Thought you were going to level with Brenda.

I am, I am. Oh, yeah.

Just wanted to do it in my own time.

Don't want her to blame me for homecoming, do I?

Hello. Anyone expecting a telegram?

Oh, don't give me a hand, anybody, will you? No, no, it's all right. I'll just

give it a ruck to myself, that's all.

What's the score then, Barry?

Indoor motor.

Oh,

Faithfully is going to get me to Jeddah, isn't she?

I think I'd better give her a complete service before I set off.

Well, you're not riding that all the way to Saudi Arabia.

No, no, I thought I might run alongside it, you know.

Here, hold on, Barry.

This is all a bit previous, innit? I mean, it's all right for you lot. You

all go your separate ways at the weekend, right?

But this is still my home.

I know it's the pits, but I don't want it turned into the pits.

Do you know what I mean?

Don't worry, I'll be tidy.

I used to be able to build a whole Meccano set to a tea tray, you know,

was a kid without losing one single piece.

Yeah?

If the match is one not all boats, drive off this trice, Dan.

It's on your bike.

Oh, hello, Dan. Nice to see you, mate.

How are you doing, killer?

I'm all right, you know. I'm just a bit bored with this German hospital radio.

It just sounds like interference and splunking, conting, splunking. Aye,

I've brought you a little something.

What, floors?

No, man, look. Look at that, man.

Oh. Yeah?

That'd have been a... A idea.

Had a bit of a problem getting it in with that lady doctor, you know. I think

she's got a bit of a down on the drink, like.

So, after what happened last night... Yeah?

Speaking about which, what exactly did happen last night?

Well, er... How much do you remember?

Er, well, let's see. I remember that German with a glass.

Aye. Bastard.

And I remember the ambulance.

Yeah.

And that's it, really, the rest of the blue.

I woke up in here this morning, I thought I'd painted the hut.

Ah, you see, you passed out in the ambulance.

Loss of blood, see?

Hey, you're a lucky lad, you know.

Lucky? Me?

If I'd hit score drawers up, they'd probably lose me bloody coupons.

You know what this is going to mean? I've lost me money from work.

I'm going to get a whacking great hospital bill when I get out. Oh, look,

don't worry about that, right? I'll take care of all that in the circumstances.

That's the least I can do, man.

Oh, bollocks. No, I'm not getting at you then. I mean, you would have done the

same for me, wouldn't you? I mean, that's what mates are for, aren't they?

mean, money doesn't come into it, mate.

Well, one good thing did come up last night, apart from me getting shaken up,

like.

What's that?

My going's back behind bars.

Oh. Aye.

He was dismembering those two Erics when the police got there, so they called it

in for the whole incident.

You and me's just down as innocent bystanders.

Oh, well, er...

Well, in that case, I want a little sort of... Go on, open it. I'm choking. What

a pain. Ah, good lad. You'll do us.

All right.

Not bad for a bloke who's just had a blood transfusion, eh?

We thought there was blood transfusion. Well, I might not have to give you

nearly four pence if... Are you trying to tell me? There's four pints of German

blood swelling about inside of me. Well, I'm only surmising it was... Oh, man,

you know what this means, don't you?

I'm half bloody German now, man. Probably got a special English tank,

aside for emergencies, you know. Ah, bollocks. All right, us? How are you

feeling, mate?

Bloody suicidal at the moment, sure.

Neville, I thought you were under strict instructions to cover that up.

Cover water.

Look, it's no good playing dumb now, my Neville. He's noticed the plaster.

You see, according to medical ethics, blood donors are supposed to remain

anonymous. But, I mean, there's no point.

Now, I mean, you might have worn a smaller plaster, Neville. What do you

Neville? Aye, it was Neville. It was Neville. Neville, if you won't tell us

will, I'm proud of you, man. I'm proud of you.

Neville gave you four pints of his blood, man. Didn't you, Nev? Didn't you,

Aye.

I did. Oh, well.

Well, what a relief. I mean, well, how can I ever thank you, Nev, for what

you've done?

It's all right. There was nothing.

Nothing? Nothing, nothing?

I've always said you were a good lad, Nev.

Hey, you know what this means, don't you? Me and you's blood brothers now.

Supposed to do it, aye. Aye, well, I'll give you a blood brother of the English

people, Nev.

Thanks, poor kid. Poor kid. Well, look, I've got to get off. I've got to go and

see young Dad, my poor kid. Oh, what, you made your decision, then? Well, I

have, Oz, yeah, but I'd rather tell her first, you know, if you don't mind.

What? Cool.

Cool, then. I understand. And listen, I can make my decision without having to

lean on you, so don't think you'll be holding to me at all, OK?

Oh, thanks. Thanks a lot, mate. Right.

I'll see you back at the hut, Dennis. Are you OK? So long, Oz. So long. Thanks

for the flowers. Look, if he ever finds out we are dead... Right.

I don't believe it.

What?

It's worth me and you get by.

And know this, it's a saying, isn't it?

Well, I've got to go home, you realise that? That's what it means, I've got to

go home.

Look, man.

Oh, yeah, there's no doubt about that.

Mind you, we've got a bridge over the Tyne, you know, that's just like that.

Well, not exactly like that, but beautiful in its own sort of way, you

You sound as if you were homesick.

You?

What is it going to be?

Ryan? At the time?

Well, I'll tell you, Bonnie, the last few days have been amongst the worst in

life. I mean, I know there hasn't been a picnic for you either, but... Well, the

way I see things now is this.

If I, er... If I was Dennis the Bald, I'd

be starting off a new life in a new country with...

with the lovely ladies accompanying him.

But unfortunately, Dennis the Brave is also a selfish sod, you know, who gets

his mates all carved up when he tries to act big.

So he goes back to being Dennis the Realistic.

And his role in life is to be there for other people to lean on.

And if three of those people happen to be his wife and his kids...

I mean to put realism before bravery every time.

Would you have stayed if Vera hadn't come last weekend?

Yeah, probably, yeah.

Don't you think that I need to lean on you just as much as she does?

No. But why not? Because Vera's got the kids, Dagmar. Don't you see? It's the

kids. They make the difference.

I mean, and because of the way I am, I mean, I'll always get pulled into the

area of greatest need. Look, look, I'm sorry, Dagmar. I really am.

How's it going?

Going to be for readying time.

Oh, thanks, sir, yeah.

I've just got one or two more adjustments to make and I think I'd

her a complete change of oil.

Oh, well, you're going to the right place for that, eh? What?

Oil.

Oil. Oil's sadly ripe, you're all. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Huh? Yeah, happy mood, isn't she?

Aye, well, the lack there, isn't it? Brilliant, man.

Been over to admin for the pack of boats, got the ticket for the Geordie

Oh, and I just rang Brenda and guess what?

What? You're throwing a surprise party for us when I get back.

Well, how can it be a surprise if you've not had it already?

Oh, don't quibble there, Barry.

Where's all you other lads, then?

Having a club, getting the stores open this afternoon.

What's happening this afternoon, Lee?

There's not been a ceremony either on your beach.

Top and out ceremony?

But our bit's not finished yet.

Don't quibble, ain't it?

Not long now.

What? One of these might be the last brick I lay in Germany.

Hey, don't start getting all sentimental, never.

Put down, put down, put down.

Keen, ain't ya?

That's all right, mate.

Keen's the guy with the bevy. Hey, not before five o 'clock, eh, lad? You don't

want to spoil our noise -exemptly work record whilst you're changing the axe on

our last day, do we? Don't do it, Dad!

What are you doing up here, then? That's different from me, isn't it? I'm a

skilled worker, mate. I'm not labourers like you lot.

I work on miniature masterpieces of war, and I do. It's got to be constrained by

mere units of time.

Oh, where's the time, by the way? It must be getting pretty close.

About 30 seconds to go, I think.

I'll give you a countdown on my superbly accurate digital watch, shall I?

Right.

15, 14...

To Oz. To Oz.

I don't believe it.

Can I drop in, lads?

I knew I had to go home on a rent.

I mean, can you imagine the difference he's going to make?

Kevin Keegan at St. James. First division football for us next season. I

Cheers. Cheers.

I bet you'd find a nurse out there,

right, that would turn plastic frank into a stiffy thing.

You reckon?

Yeah, of course. That's why they call them angels, innit?

Between you and me, Barry, I lost my cherry to a nurse.

What is that? Some depraved, dirty, hostile party, was it? No, no.

Oh, gee. No, no, no. When the children won't watch out for the hospital, I'll

dab in my crinkles out at the time.

All casual labour, no names, no factual.

Yeah, it's half of the half of that one. Well, you know, I don't think it's the

most tactful place in the world for an ex -artist to work like, you know, on

field. Oh, do you know how much you'd come in handy, man, burning all the

stubble? Oh, very good.

Look, I've got to get up. I'm going to go and see young Dagmar.

You've not changed your mind, have you?

No, I just said we'd have a farewell drink, you know.

See how beat a Jane like.

All right, then.

Take care. Hey, give a word for me, will you?

Take the place of us.

Last 4 ,000 years, this, will you not?

I tell you,

there'll always be a place for skilled labour.

Is that funny smell?

Good.

It's a bit smoky, isn't it?

No, it's definitely not socks, mate.

Stronger than socks, that is.

Stronger. It's petrol.

Hey!

Your bloody bike has been leaking petrol all over my home, you idiot.

Commission. Look, look, I really think we ought to get out of the way, you

Stop cracking her up.

But just again.

I'm glad we could say goodbye like this.

Yeah, yeah.

Well, it's better than jumping off bridges and all that nonsense.

You were... You're going to be all right?

I think so.

I have to be.

I got over relationships before, you know.

Yeah.

You were right to me.

Yeah, of course, yeah, of course.

I'll have a lot of free time on me hands when I'm back on the door.

I'll send you my new address when I move. Yeah, yeah.

Well, getting out of here will be a boom.

Have you told Vera yet?

No, no.

The arrangement was I'd give her a ring tomorrow morning.

So we could spend one last night together?

You're not expecting anybody, are you? No.

I'm sorry to disturb you, but there's been a bit of an accident.

Accident? What accident?

The hood's burnt down.

Oh, who's done that, Moxie? No, no, man. Oh, don't tell me McGowan's brought out

of the nick. No, it was Barry's bike caught fire. But, look, anyway, we've

everything. The money, the passport, the ticket, the clothes.

Oh, bloody hell.

Well, Neville, you'd better come in.

You can't play the night.

Thanks, Dagmar.

There's a couple of the lads and all.

Hi, Dagmar. Hello, Dagmar. How's it going? Hi, Dagmar.

Oh, this is how we do it, isn't it?

Working on the site from morning till night.

That's living alright.

That's living alright.

Then a pint with the boys in a buffalo noise.

That's living alright.

But you don't ask their names That's living alright

No work, no money, no prospects.

Oh, I met a bloke in the bar before and he reckons we'll be needing bricklayers

of all ways soon.

Oh, how was that?

Well, it was just a whisper, like, but he had heard that they're going to

rebuild Hadrian's Wall.

Just to keep you in beer.