Original subtitles

What's up, bro?

I've been calling you all morning. What the fuck?

Time to hit.

Time to get up.

My bad.

I didn't sleep that much.

Yo, let's go my shit Better

late than nothing my dad

ain't drastic, you know, yeah, man Let's get your shit together

happen again, Tony.

Sorry, Tony.

Do you know why people schedule things?

I'm asking you a fucking question.

No, sir.

The importance of scheduling things is having your shit together.

It's planning your ventures and having your priorities straight in the time

you're accepting.

Having a set schedule is professional.

Now I know you two are young and time don't mean shit to y 'all, but to

motherfuckers like me, we appreciate time.

Now why were you late?

I just woke up late.

And why the fuck did you wake up late?

Look, I said I was sorry. It won't happen again, all right?

Good.

Good.

You know, it's good to pay people for their time.

And you two worked for me.

That doesn't sound right.

Right?

Dipshit. Yes, Tony.

Swiping for Poonenika Waits.

But this is the only time you're going to be in Brooklyn.

Plus, I got a few matches already.

Lately, it's been these little hipster bitches, but I guess they really got a

thing for niggas out here.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah, man. It started back in, like, 2016 or 2015, I guess, but pussy's

flocking. And they're freaks, too.

Oh, really?

She got the math?

Man, they all got ass. Look at this.

Let me see.

I don't give a fuck about that.

Now give him the goddamn bags.

Wake up!

I swear, all this buffness and no brains, it's like I have fucking actors.

Fucking pitiful.

Everyone's the same.

Blood, flesh, bones.

But you, what makes you different is your self -regard.

Don't be a little bitch now.

You good?

Then get the fuck out. See ya.

Yo, I ain't gonna lie.

Shit and bricks out there, man.

Yo. Can you hear me now?

Yeah. Can you hear me now? Yeah.

Damn, Mr. Shorty got you all sprung, man.

Yeah.

He said she was asleep last night.

Yeah, man.

Shorty's in front of Recreational. She can wait for later, man.

Yeah, I'm going to wait out here.

What? Nigga, this is your boy.

No, this is your boy.

Oh, hello.

You're late.

What?

My boys!

I feel like it's been a couple months.

Nigga, it was two days ago.

What?

You're all hungry?

You look hungry.

Hey, I got some stuffers. No?

Lasagna?

No, okay. I know you'll be on the healthy shit, so I got you.

You want a carrot?

I'm good, bro.

I said you needed something.

The coke, bro, the coke.

The what? Ah, the coke. Yes, yes, yes. I got money, man.

Okay, but where is it? Wait, wait, wait.

Jenny!

Jenny!

Jenny!

Jenny!

Look at me. Oi, oi, oi.

You're running out. Please, darling.

For my friends. Come on.

Hey, I'll be back, huh?

Keep it together, man. That's your boy.

Man, it's always some extra shit. Never nothing small, would you? Don't put this

on, man. This ain't your fault. This ain't your fault? No. You're the reason

my childhood friend turned into a fucking cokehead. It was your idea to

him in the first place. It's your fault we're in this mess.

Wow,

that was quick.

Bro, Jenny, she's the fastest blonde girl in the whole fucking New York.

Bro, get the hell out of my face, man.

Some good shit, man.

Like the way that choke will look on you.

That's some fucking good shit you guys have.

Man, but the highest products, what are you gonna get from us?

What?

What's the matter with her?

Who? Sleeping Beauty over there.

I don't know.

Why don't you ask her?

Funny.

All right.

You ready to do it? Yeah, let's get up out of here, man. Huh? All right, fam.

Oh, wait, wait, wait.

I guess we're just going to smoke a knee. Yeah, we've got to bounce, man.

know what time it is. No, it's the morning. It's fine. We're okay.

No, no.

Come on. It's fine, bro.

We've got to go.

Okay, okay, well, can you say goodbye?

Come on, man. Bye.

Thank you, man.

Thank you.

Thank you for everything, man. Thank you.

What the fuck?

Oh, shit.

Oh, snap.

It's always happening.

Hey, hey, hey.

I told you. I told you about this. I told you it would come from this.

You're not going to blame this shit on me. That's not our shit.

Right here.

Bro, I don't know. She's on fucking everything.

Hey, hey, hey.

Hello? Hello? Charlie here.

Hello? Hello?

This is your friend.

Don't push me. Don't you start pushing me. This is your friend. You take care

it, okay?

I can't believe you. You're such a fucking scumbag. You never give a fuck

anybody else. Fuck yourself.

Me? Yeah, it's you. Me?

Look around at you, darling.

It looks like fucking Brooklyn in the 80s around here, okay?

This is your friend, and you keep bringing your friend, literally,

my fucking apartment.

Now she's fucking dying in my apartment, all right? And you see what?

Oh, no, no, no.

Don't fucking even start with that fucking pep -a -la -tee, you shit.

You know what? I should have fucking listened to my grandmother.

I should have stayed in my fucking apartment.

I'm not listening to you. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,

wait, wait, wait.

You trying to leave? Oh, yeah, I'm trying to leave. No, look, there's a

there dying.

Yo, when shit like this go down, you don't stick around. You heroes get out

the fuck out of there. You trippin'. I'm not standin' around to clean the scene.

When someone's about to bite the dust, man. Now, where the fuck did you go on

some fuckin' Superman hero shit, man? I ain't tryin' to get caught up. What if

the cops show up? Then let's go in there and tell them to stop freakin' arguing

and save this chick's life. Now, come on, man. I ain't signed up for this

man. Hey, yo, kill some kids. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop.

What I was pointless arguing.

Now, clearly, there's something more important going on.

Yo,

this bitch might be dead, man. Oh, my bad.

He's not dead.

My cousin and me can take care of it. We're not going to fucking dump her in

house.

She looks like a fucking mermaid.

Shut up already.

Get off me. Get off me. Get

off

me.

What the fuck I can't find that really do you think I put it on my ass yeah, I

don't know

That was the best fucking dream of my life.

Now can we please get the hell out of here?

See

what

I ain't wanting to fucking stick around? Some bullshit, bro.

Yeah, I hope that shorty is alright, man.

Yeah, she'll be alright, man.

But fuck all that, man.

Jessica Alba in 03, Kim Kardashian doing a Ray J tape.

Oh, and to make things a little harder, I'm adding the Lucy Liu with the

Charlie's Angels version.

Uh... Jennifer Lopez.

She ain't on the list, man.

All right, but you knew it at early 2000s era, right?

Yeah.

Don't get me wrong.

Kim K was super bad back then.

Yeah, she was really bad in that tape.

But that came out in 07, right?

So how are you even counting that, bro?

They filmed in 03, but the tape came out in 07. But you ain't know that, though.

Really?

Yes.

Perfect marketing.

She sat on it for four years getting her buzz up.

Then drops it at a pinnacle moment in her career when her name's all over VH1

and MTV.

Yeah, but let's be honest. You really think she planned all that?

I don't know. I'm high as fuck right now, but look at her now.

Keep it a bean. I'm going to have to change my answer.

All right, but business also plays a part.

Elaborate. All right, so in 03, streaming wasn't popping yet, right?

But J -Lo wasn't getting that white money.

For all we know, she probably had a 360 deal. Okay, cut the J -Lo shit out

already, man. I would have picked her too. That's why I didn't name her.

Lucy Lou.

Kim K, Jessica Albin, 03.

Go. Ah, you know, fine.

All right, all right, all right.

So, Kim K probably kept most of that money. We know that.

Right. But Jessica Albin and Lucy Liu was killing it in movies back then.

But there's no way that either of them kept 90 % of their cake like she did.

And somehow, she was able to use that.

To make her whole family rich.

And now, she has a whole empire.

Plus, when you add in the fact that you can see that booty from the front?

Come on, man.

Skip K all day, no question.

That's a fact, but knowing all these dudes has your girl don't bother you?

Stop, bro. The past is the past, right?

That's a double standard.

Besides, I wouldn't want anybody doing an investigation on my track record.

Would you?

I feel you, man.

Wanna know how much bread and tomatoes that take, really?

Oh,

shit, no.

My eyes, my eyes. Give me some of my fucking eyes, man.

Oh, shit. Hold on. Hold on.

Nigga. Well, you should have texted.

A little reminder doesn't hurt anybody.

Yeah, but pepper spray clearly does.

Still burns?

Still fucking sick, bro. All right, my bad, my bad. You're raw.

God.

Aw, new shorty.

Tell me about that.

Anyway, we're on a tight schedule.

You got that chicken ready?

These are all three ounces, right?

For this time. For the quality?

That's the cheapest shit I've seen since I moved from Richmond.

Alright. That actually makes things easier.

Take a look. They're all about a quap each. You can grab whichever one you

That's about four extra grand.

If you say so.

It's all there.

Alright.

This has been, um, fun.

Well, we got to get out of here.

You don't want to bump or anything?

I just got this rum from Costa Rica.

Diplomatica? Haven't even opened it yet.

Yeah.

Sounds cool, but, uh, we gotta go.

I think I'm both subconscious and wrong, and I want my cut.

Exactly. My way of saying sorry.

Don't get me wrong.

I don't know her like that. But her vibe?

Extra cool.

I don't know. She's just not like any other girl I met in the city.

Freak? What? You trying not to cuss?

You're born again, Christian.

Very funny.

Just trying to clean up my act a bit. You know, sound more professional.

Yeah, help me out, dude.

Hold on to that, my bad.

Alright, just put your face down.

Move to the right.

All right, you're good. You're good.

So, she threw you up on the first date.

Well, it wasn't really a date, per se. It was more like a nightcap.

That's worse.

Yeah, that is worse.

You missed out on pussy.

Okay, that's both of y 'all.

Look, it was late. I had a long day. My nuts probably smelled like Lord knows

what. I didn't want to go over there anyway.

Well, she sounds pretty cool, aside from the standing you up part.

I don't know if this is wrong or what.

Yeah, yo, but it's starting to feel better.

It's Bear Maze. It only has 45 minutes. You'll be fine. Bear Maze?

Yo, she did you dirty, son.

That shit ain't even funny, man.

Okay, so I've been reading about laws of attraction.

There you go with this mystical zodiac. No, it's not that.

But do you know her sign? No, because that stuff is not real.

It's a good conversation starter, though. How did I know your sign, then,

we first met?

Okay, so laws of attraction is when you...

generate positive thinking and positive attitudes, and that shit comes right

back to you and manifests your destiny.

Sounds like some self -Yoda Jedi shit, no self -help bullshit.

I don't even know what I mean.

But you guys smoke so much weed that you just sound like white conservatives.

Speaking of weed.

Okay, listen.

There is a study that this scientist did.

What scientist?

It doesn't matter. He has some weird -ass name. I don't know.

So he said that we have these things in our brains called mirror neurons, which

allow us to imitate what we see. So whatever's happening in their brain is

happening in yours.

So it's like when you see someone spark up, you want to spark up. Exactly. And

whenever I see someone smoking on TV, even though I quit, I start jonesing.

Okay. Do you remember when you were a kid and... That first person handed you

that first joint, and you started acting like them, talking like them, listening

to whatever they put you on to.

So you said that whoever you hang with starts to show through you. Exactly.

Okay. All right. So it's like, choose your friends wisely. Or it's like laws

attraction. Bro, no matter how much you say it, I'm never going to be with that

Zodiac, mystical, unicorn, whatever the freak. It's a scientific study.

Sounds kind of cool to me.

Okay, so are you feeling better because of the coke or are you just not thinking

about the pain?

That's a good question.

Shit, this fucking kid ding -dong ditching again.

Um, what is that? A truncandomelidosaur.

Hey,

get back here!

Oh, hell nah.

Yo, we gotta get out of here, son.

We out.

Yeah,

we're on our way there now.

I don't know, bro. Like, five minutes away?

Come on, bro. Here you go.

All right. And what am I supposed to tell... All right.

Okay. Tomorrow.

Yo, for real, for real, I'm feeling kind of good right now. You screwed up, bro.

You can't deliver in East Harlem anymore.

Why not? What happened?

Man, we took too long. That's what happened.

These niggas talking about this block is hot in the late afternoon.

I don't know, bro. It's always hot in the afternoon.

Damn. What happened to not aiming the 3 p .m. traffic?

Oh, you got jokes.

So whatever, man.

They said tomorrow, but that's them niggas. We're just going to keep it.

Keep it? Keep it. Yeah, bro.

We're going to keep it.

But, uh...

I think you got bigger problems to worry about than J .O.

Matter of fact, let me see.

Yo,

you need some eye drops, son? I can't believe that bitch pepper sprayed me. I

mean, you had a little time.

You could have ducked. Yeah, you could have jumped in front of me. Anyway, what

the fuck are you going to tell Tony?

Man, I got a little breath saved up. I'm going to just give it to him and pocket

the rest tomorrow.

I'm really not struggling.

Cool, but for what?

For what? What you mean?

Girls like to cope.

I like to cope. You like to cope.

At this point, there's more reason to keep it than to give it away.

You know what? I could dig it.

Consider it done.

Ah, man.

What a day, bro.

What a day. Crazy, huh?

Yeah, I know.

Ah.

Polka dot huh?

Yeah, I can't believe shorty really violated me man tore my eyes up

Fucking Xena sword waving ass bitch.

Where the fuck she get bear make from anyway?

Yo.

Yo.

Someone's at the door, man. Watch out, bro.

I gotta drop the kids off at the pool.

Hey, it's about time you went to this fucking door.

Looks like a pigsty.

Hey, where's your butt, buddy?

It's in the bathroom, taking a shit.

With his butt.

Got the money for my ass?

You wanna go in there and give him a hand?

Yeah, yeah, help yourself.

Consider a forfeiture for wasting my time.

Forfeiture? What?

Y 'all gotta expand your lexicon.

Holy crap!

It's Book Cavity and the Stunned -Ass Kid!

What the fuck is that?

Really?

1969, Spaghetti Western.

Dynamic Duel.

Gun Robbers with Trains and Horses.

Chill, my bad, but I ain't never heard of that shit before.

Really?

You can't compare people to characters they don't know.

Like, what if I said your dumbass statement reminds me of my cousin

You don't know my cousin Marcus, so how are you going to relate?

Yeah, I don't know no fucking spaghetti western. From New York City, not Iowa.

It's a really good movie.

Why don't you just say Thing 1 or Thing 2, or Kenan and Kel?

Bert and Ernie, Patrick and SpongeBob.

Roger 3000 and Big Boy.

Frodo and Sam from Lord of the Rings.

There's Fred Flintstone, Barney Rebels. Oh, and, uh, Ren and Simby.

Exactly. Batman and Robin.

Will Smith and Carlton of Tom and Jerry. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Tom and Jerry don't

count. Why not?

Because they were enemies.

All right.

If you guys don't mind, we got somewhere to be.

We were waiting for you to finish taking a shit. Well, I'm done.

Listen, let's make something perfect.

Wash your hands.

Tony wants to both of you tomorrow afternoon.

He wants to talk to you both about something.

It's a long ass trip, man. We just made that shit. It wasn't a fucking option.

See you clowns later.

Yeah. You have a cycle, right?

Can you open this fucking door?

Hey, you blowin' my spot up. I actually like that place.

There's like a hundred other places in this area that's better than this. Yeah,

get outta here with that.

Ladies, ladies.

There's two of you and one of me, but there's three sides to a triangle if you

get the point.

Is this seriously how you talk to girls?

I thought it was funny. It was actually kind of clever.

But what kind of triangle are you?

Equilateral, because the three of us are having a really good time, you feel me?

Ding, ding, ding.

And the wagons pick up my gun.

Hey, yo.

Where'd you learn how to salsa?

Half a minute ago, baby.

Salsa is Cuban?

So, where are you from?

Why do you ask?

Why wouldn't I?

Maybe I don't want you to know where I'm from.

Well, how about this?

We play 21 questions until the blunt is done, and then we can decide if we like

each other.

Wow, that is super bold, but, uh...

I'm Gabe.

I'm a Scorpio.

Comes with a territory.

So you believe in astrology.

Not exactly.

All that, you're moon and Saturn, so you might die tomorrow, shit, no, I don't

believe it. But I do believe there are similarities between those who were born

the same season.

Hmm.

So you put it that way?

Might actually change people's perspective.

Only the cute ones.

So where are you from?

Nope, you never answered my question.

So that's a foul, and I get to hold on to the L longer.

The L?

Oh, you're definitely from the East Coast.

Let me get it. Early?

Nope.

Close, though.

Your turn.

Where do you come from?

Milwaukee.

Milwaukee?

Specifically Waukesha.

I just say Milwaukee because, let's be honest, No one's ever heard of Waukesha.

Were you born there?

Nah, my parents are actually Nigerian.

They moved us here when we were little.

It was either Milwaukee or New Zealand.

They still chose New Zealand.

Do you have brothers and sisters?

Now who's committing fouls?

See, I let you get one extra question because you're kind of cute or whatever,

but... So you going to tell me where you're from or what?

South Jersey.

Wow, when you said coast, I didn't know you meant literally next door.

That's what's up, though. So you're a Jersey girl? No.

And if you're referring to those Jersey Shore people, then fuck no.

I didn't even realize people like that existed until that show came out.

Gotta admit though, the show kinda changed everything.

Okay.

Impressive.

I'm a pro.

Hey, Miss Brown.

So do you ever miss it?

Jersey, that is.

Not really.

I love New York.

You know, I could be myself here.

We could always restart here. There's always a new job, a new group of

a new wave.

Why did you move out here?

Well, I lived in Philly for a while.

Did a lot of dumb stuff.

I mean, I'm still doing dumb stuff.

But here I can at least try to make something of myself.

I mean, it's like you said, right?

And this restarts.

Oh.

So, have you decided if you like me or not yet?

I'm still deciding.

Does that mean you like me?

What? Girl, I like you like five plus.

36 hours ago.

The real question is, where do we go from here?

Well, going with the flow is never a bad

option.

I can dig that.

Are you starting to feel good?

Altoids?

Something more on your heart.

Oh, it's like that.

Mm -hmm.

See?

I should be together while worlds do us apart.

But the way I feel won't get me through the night.

You and I must be together

as shadows do collide.

Whispers in tongues, your dressing gown.

Together you can see it in the stars.

Those maps of lights collide into my heart.

But tonight there won't be another. Just

don't wait for return.

... ... ... ...

... ...

don't think it's trying to but

What's good, my guy?

Why are you jerking off on my couch?

I slept over last night.

Yeah, I can see that.

But why are you jerking off on my couch?

I do.

I have to rub one out. Bro, you can open your eyes. I ain't fucking like

dealing. I ain't gonna paint your walls.

Oh, bring some girls around.

Let's go create.

You're always talking about it. Then when I bring you not one, But two bad

you don't even close.

You're lucky they didn't rob you. I got my dick out, balls in hand, you gonna

grill me about it?

Don't you think I know that? I fucked up.

But that's part of it.

What?

Beating your dick, nigga.

It affects the way you present yourself and talk to girls.

I mean, look around you. I'm not in high school anymore.

You can't talk to women like all you want is sex.

That's all I want though.

Okay.

Put your nuts away and we'll continue this conversation later.

I'm going to deal with you now.

Anyway, so now I'm about to go in on Denny, right?

Do a bunch of lines.

She got a nice lip, green eyes.

It was perfect timing, right? I'm about to lay it on her.

She got the nerve to stop me and tell me, I don't think of you that way, and

continues to snore my shit.

Yeah.

I thought you were digging lava, though.

I was, but I was fucked up.

Plus, I like hard to get, man.

Okay. You can't go from complaining about getting none to neglecting one.

You get that from a fucking fortune cookie?

I'm just saying, you gotta crawl before you can walk, right?

How about you? You got boys last night?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

She was too cool to treat like a pussy or anything like that.

She was, um, like, uh... She got you sprung like a motherfucker.

How was that shit? Shit was good?

Gentlemen never tell.

Yo, you sound like a bitch right now.

Gentlemen never tell.

Get the fuck out of here with that shit, man.

Yo, you trying to get the pads after this?

I'm with it.

Whoa.

Yo,

we should bag that up so our quantity can double up. I'm down for that.

You know, I'll clone anything until next time, son.

Go back on schedule.

I can't believe you gave him three grand like that. What? Come on, man. I got

about ten pages up.

Goddamn. What? My paper's low as fuck.

You get paid the same amount.

You got something going on.

Well, I don't know how you stack it.

The city got too much mileage, and that gas tank costs.

Remember Nico?

Nah. My sister's husband. He comes through to pick up a knee. A knee?

That concha.

All right.

We're going to have Carteri to come through anyway.

It's time we're going to Tony's, though.

Dang. I got that nigga.

Man, he owns us. Man, he's going to want us to push more weight.

How do you feel about that?

Man, you don't even have a choice.

It's true.

The quicker we deal with his ass, the quicker he's out the picture. You

Hang on, boy.

Yo, I ain't gonna lie.

I'm kind of a fiend in this t -shirt, man.

Yeah, she got you like that, huh?

What do you mean, stunting on me like that? You're not coming through. Man, I

don't want it if I can't have both.

You know what?

Maybe we'll have a fiesta, fiesta. Whoa, whoa.

What?

Surviving Artelio?

Man, I still fuck with his music.

You a wild boy.

You motherfuckers are finally on time.

Just be careful.

Waxed the floor a few days ago. Couldn't have told me that earlier.

I'll be with you two in a second.

Here you go.

Have you made up your mind?

You know this tough girl shit's not going to get you very far.

It's a shame.

Because you're pretty thick. You know what I'm saying? Usually I take a girl

like you and try to muscle her out.

Maybe another time. Let me get some...

Whoa, you serious?

That's just funny?

I need a favor.

I'm okay.

Yo, what the hell was that, man?

I have a meeting up today with the Supreme Court.

And while I'm up there, these dirty, stinking, fucking little pigs will

raid and shit on my fucking property. Fucking rat bastards.

And fucking jigs.

Yo, bro.

You know like 1 .5 million Americans used coke in the last month?

We don't even supply a third of that energy. Really? More like 1 million in

York alone.

You think so? I think more. Yo, let me tell you a story. Actually, my cousin

Jerry moved here last year.

I gave him an 8 on Friday.

And my money. He had a Russian girlfriend.

And a roommate while I'm out resting. A rich -ass financial district. Wait, bro.

Yo, man.

I'm a dead ass.

I'm telling you. I'm in a valid connect.

No, not even. I hear you, Bruce.

No.

Listen.

Can you guys just shut the fuck up for 30 seconds?

My empire's on the line here, and you two are talking about your cousin's cock

in a pen -out?

Seriously! This is not an episode of Empire.

The power's a better example.

Shut the fuck up!

This is serious.

I need a favor from you, pal.

I have six kilos tucked away, and obviously I can't flush that down the

I need you two to hold it for me.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

We all do respect, Tony.

I'm not trying to be responsible for your money, man.

Yeah, that's a lot, man. You might as well hand the ring over to the damn

program. That's a no -go.

They are associates of mine.

They will get checked out and searched.

I can't take that chance.

That's a lot of weight, man.

For you, it is.

I know.

That's why if you do this for me, your debts will be paid.

One message.

Now listen.

You guys don't have to sell anything.

But if you do, you're only going to pay his price.

Nothing changes.

This is a favor in itself.

Sounds good to me.

To be real, trust me, don't fuck.

Yo,

let me get one of those.

What happened?

Let me get a cigarette.

Oh, you smoke bogeys now?

Yeah, I'm kind of stressing.

Kind of?

Bro, what the fuck did we just do?

It's harder to say no to people's faces, man. You know that.

Yeah, fuck that, man. We should give it back, bro. Six keys?

Nigga, you know where we at right now? The walls have ears.

Bro, six keys.

All right.

Look, I'll keep it at my crib.

You said it's just one day, right?

Then we're done with Tony, and we never have to deal with him or his stupid

bones again.

So chill, all right? We got this. You're staying fucked up all weekend, man.

That reminds me.

Still got a hit up out there.

What?

Yo, it should be us trapped inside that apartment with a bunch of guns, movies,

and a ton of chicken papas until this shit is gone, man.

Bro, why would we do that? Hey!

Yeah, I was thinking we can kick it at my place tonight.

Get some bottles, some buns, some white girl, and just chill.

Oh, you with Zenni and Lala right now?

That works out. I'm actually with Rolo.

Okay.

Bye.

Yo, you really wildin' right now, B. You buggin', man.

Let me guess.

You wanted the circle jerk instead.

Yeah, that's what I thought.

You be alright?

I mean, am I good?

I mean, I feel like I'm on like 5 Adderall. Like, it's that nofap wave,

telling you, it got me feeling like I'm fucking Anthony Joshua.

Bro,

it will change your fucking life.

Make a pizza. What's up? I don't smoke.

For real? When?

Two weeks ago. I'm looking good, right?

Get the fuck out of here.

Are you just going to cop on me? Your sister's waiting for me. She wanted this

shit a few hours ago.

Oh, God.

Yeah. Be a good thing, though, man. Be safe out there, all right?

All right, y 'all. Well, it's been fun, but I got to hit the road. All right.

Take care, man. See ya.

You got some pizza by the end of the store.

Shit, I lost my papers at home.

I mean, I got a phone.

Yeah, fuck that.

Hey,

yo. You want to go to the store? Who you at?

Oh, could you grab me some Nilla wafers?

The cookies are the rest of your cardboard box thingies.

Cardboard thingies? The cookies are called Nilla wafers?

Way different, but those kind of sound good, too. Could you grab both?

No, no, no, no, no.

Get the ruffle potato chip and the dip.

Not the salsa, not the bean, not the fucking ranch.

I want that French onion dip. The same shit the guy's been making for 50 years.

If we're being fucking specific, there better not be no broken wafers in the

bag.

That's funny, but for real Kara, don't fuck it up. You know I only eat

friendship. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

We're going to the corner store, okay?

We're not going to the grocery shop.

How long, Sarah?

Snacks are way more fun, okay?

Ooh, I got it, I got it.

Caramel popcorn.

No, no, it's fine. We can get what you want.

For real.

Not politically correct to have a black person in a Popeye's commercial.

Or KFC.

Shit like that just looks bad.

How, though?

Black people love fried food just as much as Asian people, white people.

It really shouldn't matter.

Fried food is fucking awesome.

It does matter.

Because stereotypes lead to racist shit.

Like, I'd rather fuck with fried chicken than a taco.

Look, that's you.

So you're telling me you deny that black people cook the best fried chicken?

Fuck no.

All right, then. You can't say that.

Okay, but black people cook the best, period, though.

Ooh, that's an opinion. Because I think Spanish people cook the best. Hmm,

that's a bold statement.

Because barbecues is shit, and black people can barbecue.

I'm telling you right now, your favorite restaurant, probably got a Spanish

person in the back cooking right now.

Bullshit. No matter, no matter. I don't care if they're Dominican, Mexican,

Spanish, whatever.

Okay, I don't doubt that. But who invented the food in the first place?

Rilo, I'm not fooling with you.

I'm just thinking those facts, girl.

Let me not even get the Italian food. That's a whole nother.

Oh, no.

What the fuck? This is not my fault.

How is this not your fault?

I'm so tired of all these fucking episodes with you. Wow.

You know what? And I'm tired of you and Tara always blaming me for the shit that

happened. So you're saying this isn't your fault?

Yeah, I am. It's an accident.

And normal people have it happen to them all the time.

All right, you're confusing a fuck -up with an accident, honey.

Ooh, and you're confusing me with somebody who gives a fuck.

All right, well, maybe we should. And we would have a little bit less of these

issues.

Oh, Virgo. Just hurry up, bitch.

Not everything can be Gucci in your tiny, perfect world.

There you go. Clean it up, sweetie.

What a fucking lame plan.

Yo, get up, y 'all, man. Y 'all want to eat fucking dinner off the floor? Come

on, man.

Follow me to the fucking kitchen. Hold on, man.

Oh, my fucking God. What, are you serious?

It's like Christmas all over again, baby.

What? Does this have, like, an insurance policy on it or something?

Nah, it's on the house. Who wants to do some shots?

Yes, please. Are you telling me?

It's on me, man.

I'm down for shots.

It's a little something I got from Costa Rica.

Diplomatica. Yay!

I must say, this has been a

good night.

Okay.

You guys are not even with me. Cheers.

What the fuck?

Damn. So selfish.

Cheers.

Some more wild nights.

I'm really starting.

What were you saying?

I was saying... It

tastes like rainbow.

Should probably get back. Yeah, okay

Yeah, so that's why I broke up with him. I'm just not into feminine men.

Don't feminists believe in that shit, like masculine men turning them into

-ass niggas?

If feminism makes you feel emasculated, then your manhood wasn't that strong

enough to forgive with.

I'm taking.

Yeah.

I would say I'm about 100 % feminine.

Probably 110%. But I need a masculine man. I can't deal with these bitch -ass

niggas. So your boyfriend wanted a finger in his ass and you thought that

too gay or something?

Nah, nah. I totally get stimulated in the male prostate.

If I'm going down on you, of course I'm going to play with your ass. But he

didn't want a pinky or an index.

He wanted three fingers in.

That's crazy.

It got to the point where he would be on all fours, ass up in the air.

I felt like we were two months away from me wearing a strap -on and blasting his

fucking butt. Yo, that's aggressive, man.

Yeah.

So you're not into that?

Hmm?

What? Wear a strap -on and fucking do it. No.

Are you?

Oh, hell no. I mean, I don't mind him taking it, we're being honest, but, um,

was he way too late?

Oh, black and a football player.

NFL? No, just college.

Oh, fuck it.

Really, that's not true.

What kind of penis is on the street right now? Yo, for real, though, but

just down the block. They've been going a long time.

Music got the best in me ever since I was a

child.

And now it's doing its ugly face.

What can I do?

Music creeps into my dreams.

Wakes me in.

What can I do?

So I better use my legs and run Before it is too late

to flee I feel there is no other way

It's what I can do, what I can do And

I want to be with you But you know there's music too

Stop this get by.

Stop this get by.

Oh, God.

How long have we been going?

A feeling, I guess.

Okay. Gosh. Where are these other A -holes at?

Okay, Miss Gigi.

This bitch is always cheaping the blood. Oh, there's two bloods. Come on.

So Cartera tells me you want to be a model.

Yeah, I mean, till I get done.

Have you ever worked on your walk?

My walk?

Yeah, and runway, you gotta have a certain swag about you when you walk the

runway.

Okay, I mean, I never thought about that, but I feel you.

She hasn't gotten that for you.

No. Since we are in New York City, you will be doing a lot of work on it. All

right. Yeah, usually at black events, they want you to have Addison, swag, a

certain type of finesse. They call it the UPN of modeling.

You know?

Okay.

All right. Yes.

And then we have the regular walk, the standard.

I call it the dunk because it's more of a European style.

Shoulders back, straight corners of the eyes, and walk straight and normal.

Yes, kills it every time.

And then he has a New York City style.

It's high energy, more serious, and quick.

Oh, like the thing.

Hey,

do you guys want to play Chicago?

What's that?

You never heard of Chicago?

Take your clothes off.

Don't you want roses on the

floor?

Take your clothes off.

Thank you.

We'll be right back.

Yo Yo The girls leave Hey here, baby. I just woke up

a little while ago.

Yeah, but you're a price in my business Yo,

you got one last night, you know, I'm the perfect gentleman.

Come on man. Just me and you man

Yeah,

we've been doing it.

I ain't gonna lie.

The sex drive is crazy, son.

I ain't never been with another girl like that.

Rub it in, huh?

You asked.

But, uh, let's go with you.

Fucking passed out again, man. I got too fucked up.

Do you see the pattern here?

Know what?

Stop getting trashed.

Man, whatever, man.

Hey, yo.

You still gotta go to Tony's later.

At least we give him all his shit back and we off his fucking leash, man.

For real.

Yo.

What's good? I know.

After this, there's no more coke, no more money.

I'm out.

I'm out.

I know, I know, man, but... Maybe it's for the best, man, you know?

But you better fuck this game up with this model and shit, though.

100%.

Fuck outta here, man. I'ma go home freshen up.

Meet you at Tony's in an hour.

Alright, that's cool.

Alright, bro.

Your call has been forwarded to an automatic voice message system.

Your call has been forwarded to an automated voice...

Yo, where the fuck you at, man?

Whoa,

whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down. What you mean she took everything? Who?

I told you that was a dumbass place to keep the money in the fucking drawer

it's the 90s.

I ain't got they number, bro. I never got it.

I can't believe you really got pussy whipped by a wild one on some Jon Snow

shit.

Yeah, and I gotta get the fuck out of here, man. Fuck.

Yeah, man, whatever.

Fall in love, my sacred sentiment Fall in love

There are some kind of aids.

I was going to like them. Yeah, me too, but come on, can you believe me?

I mean, in the grand scheme of things, it makes sense.

Well,

I thought it was a tad bit of griminess mixed with thottiness.

That's a tad whole.

When you mix body fluids and mac and boost, things can get kind of personal.

I know you felt something, Katera.

Well, yeah. I mean, he was cute.

I liked him, but... Like, come on! We've got to have a time of our lives!

Chris, the hotel in Puerto Vallarta?

For two weeks?

Come on, girls, you know, you're not gonna... You're not being good friends

you're just gonna bitch a complaint hole right there.

All I'm saying is that it looks pretty deep to me, and I just don't think

ever gonna change.

And you're not a good friend, so you can't call us bad friends, like,

essentially. Oh, yeah, fuck that.

The three of us. How long has it been just the three of us? The three amigas?

The two best.

The Powderpuff Girls.

Destiny's Child.

Charlie's Angels.

Snap, Crackle, and Pop.

Winifred, Mary, and Sarah.

Yeah, yeah, continue.

Yes, and you know, I could have kept it all to myself, all his yo -yo, all his

money, but that would have been selfish.

That's what you do, though. You meet niggas and beat niggas.

You're so nice.

Big love and lots of love. Okay.

Yeah, Lala was cute.

They were both cute.

Why does it feel like you two are not with us?

Listen, I'm just saying, why do you always have to be every guy you come

See, that's your problem. Too many bodies on some Scorpio shit.

Whatever. You know, I'm going to check to see when the train's coming.

All right.

See, let's do not tell me that was all you brought.

No, no, no.

Lala, girl.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Nothing, huh?

What do you want me to say?

Something. Just give me something.

So all that was nothing?

No.

Then why?

Am I an idiot or what?

Like, is this what you do? Go around breaking niggas' hearts and stealing

them?

I don't know.

Whoa.

You were catching feelings?

You're one hell of an actress. I thought you were too.

I do.

That feeling for you actually made me too much feeling.

You sure have a funny way of showing it.

I guess I'm just a shitty person.

The more I thought of you, the more I wanted to pull away.

Why? It's the opposite of what people do.

It's the opposite of what I want to do. What did you want to do?

What were your intentions when you first came up to me?

Sex? A fuck buddy? No. A one night stand? No.

And even if it was, it doesn't give you the right to just rob me.

Is that really what you thought of me?

Yes.

No, no, I... Okay.

You have no idea what I've been through.

Just tell me instead of shutting me down. I track the worst guys.

Whether it's bruises or broken heart or shitloads of peppermint ice cream just

to boost my self -esteem.

No matter what.

I always end up with the fucking Chris Brown type of guy. Did I really come off

like that?

You know, not every guy in this city is a jerk.

Some of us might want a real relationship.

Some of us might want a family. Some of us might want to fall in love.

What did I do to make you afraid of me?

Fear of falling in love and ending up heartbroken.

You know, I know it sounds stupid, but Zenny's always telling me that since I'm

a Scorpio, I'm cursed and that I have really bad trust issues.

And you know what? I'm starting to believe her.

Well, she's not wrong about the trust issues, but I don't believe in that

stuff. And I don't think you're that screwed up either.

I mean, don't get me wrong, what you did was very, and I do mean very messed up.

But I know that you're not one of them.

There's no explanation.

For what it's worth, Scorpio or not, stung me.

Definitely had it bad.

What's your sign?

It doesn't even matter.

Yeah, it doesn't matter.

Well, look, here's all your stuff.

Look, 20 minutes ago, I was so clear, very clear on what I wanted to do, but

how I'm feeling now, what it's worth, I'm really sorry.

Wait.

You don't have to leave.

Look, I'm no good for you, okay?

What the?

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

Thank you.

We'll be right back.