Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:21,420 --> 00:00:22,754
You're not going
to believe this.
2
00:00:22,788 --> 00:00:24,889
I'm coming out of my apartment
this morning--
3
00:00:24,923 --> 00:00:26,324
For the third time this week,
4
00:00:26,359 --> 00:00:29,661
Some jackass has double-parked
right in front of my car!
5
00:00:29,695 --> 00:00:32,430
I keep trying to get
the cops to do something,
6
00:00:32,465 --> 00:00:35,032
But apparently I have to clip
an old lady in a crosswalk
7
00:00:35,067 --> 00:00:37,769
To get anyone to pay
any attention to me.
8
00:00:37,803 --> 00:00:41,673
I mean, can you believe that?
9
00:00:41,707 --> 00:00:42,474
What did I tell you
10
00:00:42,508 --> 00:00:43,941
About chewing gum
in the office?
11
00:00:43,976 --> 00:00:44,942
What?
12
00:00:44,977 --> 00:00:46,043
It's not professional.
13
00:00:46,078 --> 00:00:47,345
I don't let linda
do it,
14
00:00:47,380 --> 00:00:49,314
So you shouldn't
do it either.
15
00:00:49,348 --> 00:00:49,881
Come on, out with it.
16
00:00:49,915 --> 00:00:50,882
Margaret, I...
Ah-ah-ah-ah!
17
00:00:50,916 --> 00:00:51,883
I need...
18
00:00:51,917 --> 00:00:53,285
Ah-ah-ah-ah!
19
00:00:53,319 --> 00:00:55,320
Margaret, that's
nicotine gum.
20
00:00:55,354 --> 00:00:57,222
I'm trying
to quit smoking.
21
00:00:57,256 --> 00:00:59,157
You know, if I don't
have that stuff,
22
00:00:59,191 --> 00:01:00,559
It's gonna be cold turkey,
like last time.
23
00:01:00,593 --> 00:01:02,994
Oh, please, god, chew.
24
00:01:03,029 --> 00:01:04,328
Excuse me.
25
00:01:04,363 --> 00:01:06,164
Oh, I'm sorry, sweetie.
John, this little girl
26
00:01:06,198 --> 00:01:08,033
Is selling tickets
to raise money
27
00:01:08,067 --> 00:01:09,768
For st. Steven's
youth group.
28
00:01:09,802 --> 00:01:11,569
Oh, good for you,
good for you.
29
00:01:11,603 --> 00:01:12,804
Who's up?
30
00:01:12,838 --> 00:01:15,206
The tickets are
for our pancake breakfast
31
00:01:15,241 --> 00:01:17,275
That helps the st. Steven's
youth group
32
00:01:17,309 --> 00:01:19,510
Pay for a trip
to washington, d.C.
33
00:01:19,544 --> 00:01:21,046
Gosh, well, I'm all in favor
34
00:01:21,080 --> 00:01:23,381
Of sending children
as far away as possible,
35
00:01:23,415 --> 00:01:25,083
But, uh, I'm a little busy
right now,
36
00:01:25,117 --> 00:01:26,851
So why don't you
come back later,
37
00:01:26,886 --> 00:01:29,821
Like when you're all grown up
and I'm dead.
38
00:01:29,855 --> 00:01:31,155
You're being rude.
39
00:01:31,591 --> 00:01:33,091
"st. Steven's
youth group
40
00:01:33,125 --> 00:01:35,694
"gives young boys
and girls at risk
41
00:01:35,728 --> 00:01:37,995
"a sense
of moral responsibility.
42
00:01:38,030 --> 00:01:40,998
"in our own way, we are trying
to build a better world
43
00:01:41,033 --> 00:01:42,500
"and a brighter tomorrow.
44
00:01:42,535 --> 00:01:45,236
Won't you contribute today,
please?"
45
00:01:48,073 --> 00:01:49,274
No.
46
00:01:49,308 --> 00:01:52,643
John, how can you say no
to that face?
47
00:01:52,678 --> 00:01:54,612
The trick is not to look
directly at her.
48
00:01:54,647 --> 00:01:57,048
Oh, come on, marg...
49
00:01:59,151 --> 00:02:01,052
All right, how much?
50
00:02:01,086 --> 00:02:02,854
A booklet of tickets
is only $20.
51
00:02:02,888 --> 00:02:06,558
So, how many booklets would you
like to buy today, sir?
52
00:02:06,592 --> 00:02:07,559
How many?
53
00:02:07,593 --> 00:02:09,628
Oh, yeah, nice try, slick.
54
00:02:09,662 --> 00:02:10,795
I'll take one booklet
55
00:02:10,829 --> 00:02:12,296
And only one.
56
00:02:12,331 --> 00:02:13,365
Thank you.
57
00:02:13,399 --> 00:02:14,532
You're welcome.
58
00:02:14,567 --> 00:02:17,334
Oh, gee, I feel bad.
59
00:02:17,369 --> 00:02:20,538
I only bought one ticket
for one dollar.
60
00:02:20,573 --> 00:02:23,107
You could buy just one?
61
00:02:23,141 --> 00:02:25,410
( laughing )
62
00:02:25,444 --> 00:02:27,212
Linda, you're late.
I know.
63
00:02:27,246 --> 00:02:29,347
I've been outside
racking my brain,
64
00:02:29,382 --> 00:02:31,749
Trying to figure a way
to bring up my vacation days.
65
00:02:31,784 --> 00:02:33,017
Vacation days?
66
00:02:33,051 --> 00:02:34,318
Well, since you
brought it up...
67
00:02:34,352 --> 00:02:35,553
No, look, please,
please, please.
68
00:02:35,588 --> 00:02:37,421
Can't we just talk
about this some other time,
69
00:02:37,590 --> 00:02:40,892
Like when you're all grown up
and I'm dead?
70
00:02:40,926 --> 00:02:42,394
Mrs. Snyder, you're up.
71
00:02:42,428 --> 00:02:45,730
Anyways, I've got two
vacation days coming.
72
00:02:45,765 --> 00:02:47,365
I'd like to roll
those over
73
00:02:47,400 --> 00:02:51,002
Along with any personal days
and sick days
74
00:02:51,036 --> 00:02:53,772
And take next summer off.
75
00:02:53,806 --> 00:02:56,174
Are you talking about days
when you're really sick
76
00:02:56,208 --> 00:02:58,376
Or days when you just say
you're sick?
77
00:02:58,410 --> 00:02:59,343
Both.
78
00:03:00,913 --> 00:03:02,247
You've got two
vacation days coming
79
00:03:02,281 --> 00:03:04,849
That you either have to use
by the end of the month
80
00:03:04,883 --> 00:03:06,051
Or you lose them.
81
00:03:06,085 --> 00:03:09,087
Wow, I never thought
I could lose a vacation.
82
00:03:09,121 --> 00:03:10,622
Although I once lost
83
00:03:10,656 --> 00:03:11,656
The month of November.
84
00:03:11,690 --> 00:03:13,224
Course, I didn't really lose it.
85
00:03:13,258 --> 00:03:15,392
I bought a calendar
that was missing November.
86
00:03:15,427 --> 00:03:16,961
But the christmas dinner
I cooked
87
00:03:16,996 --> 00:03:18,596
Fell right on thanksgiving,
88
00:03:18,631 --> 00:03:20,598
So it was okay.
Of course, I was
89
00:03:20,633 --> 00:03:22,800
All by myself on new year's eve
in times square,
90
00:03:22,834 --> 00:03:23,968
But the ball was just...
91
00:03:24,002 --> 00:03:25,703
Linda, I am growing old here.
92
00:03:25,737 --> 00:03:28,539
Are you going to take
the vacation days or not?
93
00:03:28,574 --> 00:03:31,943
Any chance I could have a couple
days off to think about it?
94
00:03:31,977 --> 00:03:33,010
Oy!
95
00:03:40,886 --> 00:03:43,087
Well, the trucks are out there
again this morning.
96
00:03:43,121 --> 00:03:44,956
My car is still blocked in.
97
00:03:44,990 --> 00:03:46,925
And when I call to complain
to the cops,
98
00:03:46,959 --> 00:03:48,259
Do I get a real policeman?
99
00:03:48,293 --> 00:03:49,494
No, no, no.
100
00:03:49,528 --> 00:03:52,096
I get the answering
machine, which cuts me off
101
00:03:52,130 --> 00:03:54,899
After the first
15 minutes.
102
00:03:54,933 --> 00:03:57,268
You know, becker,
I can solve this for you.
103
00:03:57,303 --> 00:03:59,604
Park your car on another street.
104
00:03:59,638 --> 00:04:00,671
Oh, you know, I'd love to,
105
00:04:00,705 --> 00:04:03,041
But as I may have mentioned,
I can't move my car!
106
00:04:03,075 --> 00:04:05,076
Uh, john, did you
just get a cigarette?
107
00:04:05,111 --> 00:04:06,410
I thought you quit smoking.
108
00:04:06,445 --> 00:04:07,411
Oh.
109
00:04:07,647 --> 00:04:10,081
That's right, I did.
110
00:04:10,449 --> 00:04:11,215
Becker, if you quit smoking,
111
00:04:11,250 --> 00:04:12,583
Why do you even keep
the cigarettes in there?
112
00:04:12,617 --> 00:04:14,519
They're in there
for the next time he quits.
113
00:04:14,553 --> 00:04:15,520
Hey, screw you.
114
00:04:15,554 --> 00:04:17,222
As a matter of fact,
I think I found
115
00:04:17,256 --> 00:04:19,624
A way out of this
cycle of dependency:
116
00:04:19,658 --> 00:04:20,691
Nicotine gum.
117
00:04:22,528 --> 00:04:24,261
Oh, yeah, there it is.
118
00:04:26,365 --> 00:04:27,332
( sighs )
119
00:04:27,366 --> 00:04:29,567
Hello, my old friend.
120
00:04:29,601 --> 00:04:31,636
So, you want something to eat?
121
00:04:31,670 --> 00:04:33,771
No, thank you. I'm-- ooh.
122
00:04:33,806 --> 00:04:36,941
I'm, uh, on my way
to a breakfast, a charity thing.
123
00:04:36,975 --> 00:04:38,242
So you didn't come here
to smoke
124
00:04:38,276 --> 00:04:39,844
And you didn't come
in here to eat.
125
00:04:39,878 --> 00:04:41,346
What are you doing here?
126
00:04:41,380 --> 00:04:45,016
I have no idea.
127
00:04:45,051 --> 00:04:47,652
Well, there's another bad habit
I'm gonna have to break.
128
00:04:48,054 --> 00:04:49,687
See you, guys.
129
00:04:51,624 --> 00:04:53,057
Excuse me.
130
00:04:53,091 --> 00:04:54,459
Hi.
131
00:04:54,493 --> 00:04:55,793
Uh, I'd like to make
a reservation
132
00:04:55,827 --> 00:04:56,894
For tomorrow at 1:00.
133
00:04:56,928 --> 00:04:59,664
( laughing ) ( laughing
)
134
00:04:59,698 --> 00:05:02,067
That shouldn't be a problem,
mister...?
135
00:05:02,101 --> 00:05:03,935
Hutchinson. Clark hutchinson.
136
00:05:03,969 --> 00:05:05,436
Reg, you sure you don't
want to double-check
137
00:05:05,471 --> 00:05:07,004
Your reservation book?
138
00:05:07,038 --> 00:05:08,305
( laughing )
( laughing )
139
00:05:09,941 --> 00:05:12,777
Oh, jake, you've got something
stuck in your teeth.
140
00:05:12,811 --> 00:05:13,811
Oh, really?
141
00:05:13,879 --> 00:05:15,813
Mm.
142
00:05:15,847 --> 00:05:17,716
Never mind them.
143
00:05:17,750 --> 00:05:20,118
It's just, most people
don't make reservations.
144
00:05:20,152 --> 00:05:21,820
Oh, sorry. It's just sort
of a special occasion.
145
00:05:21,854 --> 00:05:23,521
You see, my wife and I met here
146
00:05:23,555 --> 00:05:25,323
Exactly three years ago
tomorrow.
147
00:05:25,357 --> 00:05:26,590
Really?
Yeah.
148
00:05:26,625 --> 00:05:30,027
I mean, we sort of think
of this place as "our place."
149
00:05:30,061 --> 00:05:31,896
If this is your place,
what's your song?
150
00:05:31,930 --> 00:05:33,664
"the wreck
of the edmund fitzgerald"?
151
00:05:35,201 --> 00:05:37,001
Clark:
I'll never forget that day.
152
00:05:37,035 --> 00:05:39,036
I was miserable,
it was raining out,
153
00:05:39,070 --> 00:05:42,407
I'd just lost my job,
my car had been repossessed...
154
00:05:42,441 --> 00:05:44,209
Yep, this would be
the next stop.
155
00:05:44,243 --> 00:05:46,211
Clark:
So I ducked in here
156
00:05:46,245 --> 00:05:47,344
To get some coffee,
157
00:05:47,379 --> 00:05:50,915
And the most amazing-looking
woman came over to my table.
158
00:05:50,949 --> 00:05:54,051
You're so sweet.
159
00:05:54,085 --> 00:05:55,953
Oh, not you, though.
160
00:05:57,556 --> 00:05:58,823
I meant my wife claire.
161
00:05:58,857 --> 00:05:59,557
Oh.
162
00:05:59,591 --> 00:06:01,059
Ow.
163
00:06:01,093 --> 00:06:01,760
( laughing )
164
00:06:03,162 --> 00:06:06,164
Jake, your teeth.
It's still there.
165
00:06:06,198 --> 00:06:07,665
Ah, damn.
166
00:06:07,699 --> 00:06:11,169
Anyway, I fell in love
on the spot... With claire.
167
00:06:11,203 --> 00:06:12,337
How nice for you.
Yeah.
168
00:06:12,371 --> 00:06:13,504
There's more.
169
00:06:13,538 --> 00:06:15,106
Uh, right over there,
I bought a newspaper
170
00:06:15,140 --> 00:06:17,341
That had an ad for a job
with an internet company.
171
00:06:17,375 --> 00:06:18,742
Long story short, now I own it.
172
00:06:18,777 --> 00:06:20,178
I tell you,
173
00:06:20,212 --> 00:06:22,479
This is the luckiest diner
in the world.
174
00:06:24,416 --> 00:06:25,750
See you tomorrow.
175
00:06:29,455 --> 00:06:31,288
You realize what just
happened here, don't you?
176
00:06:31,323 --> 00:06:34,391
Three years ago, that guy
came in with all his bad luck
177
00:06:34,426 --> 00:06:35,927
And left it here.
178
00:06:35,961 --> 00:06:37,695
Then he took all my good luck,
179
00:06:37,730 --> 00:06:39,931
Walked out the door
with that bitch claire.
180
00:06:41,366 --> 00:06:44,368
No wonder my life is crap.
181
00:06:44,402 --> 00:06:45,970
So, what are you saying?
That you were born
182
00:06:46,004 --> 00:06:47,939
With only so much good luck
and that guy stole it?
183
00:06:47,973 --> 00:06:49,908
Do you have a better
explanation?
184
00:06:49,942 --> 00:06:52,309
No, no. Makes sense to me.
185
00:06:52,344 --> 00:06:53,644
Damn right it does.
186
00:06:53,679 --> 00:06:55,780
For three years, I've had
nothing but bad luck.
187
00:06:55,814 --> 00:06:57,848
Okay, how about now, reg?
Still there?
188
00:06:57,883 --> 00:07:00,184
Yes, jake,
it's stuck forever.
189
00:07:00,218 --> 00:07:01,753
Just like me.
190
00:07:03,088 --> 00:07:04,021
Okay, bob, do I
have something
191
00:07:04,056 --> 00:07:05,089
In my teeth or not?
192
00:07:05,124 --> 00:07:06,624
Jake, you never had
anything in your teeth.
193
00:07:06,658 --> 00:07:08,492
She was just
jerking you around.
194
00:07:08,526 --> 00:07:11,028
Might want to check
your nose, though.
195
00:07:28,213 --> 00:07:29,614
Hi. I'm mrs. Howarth.
Can I help you?
196
00:07:29,648 --> 00:07:31,549
Yeah, I'm here for the
pancake breakfast.
197
00:07:31,583 --> 00:07:33,351
Oh, great. Grab an apron
and a spatula, 'cause we...
198
00:07:33,385 --> 00:07:35,453
No, no, no, no, no.
I'm here to eat.
199
00:07:35,487 --> 00:07:38,622
Oh. Well, there must have been
some misunderstanding.
200
00:07:38,657 --> 00:07:41,059
The breakfast is
for the children.
201
00:07:41,093 --> 00:07:42,894
I know, I know.
To send them all
away somewhere.
202
00:07:42,928 --> 00:07:44,863
But, uh, where do
you want me to sit?
203
00:07:44,897 --> 00:07:46,830
I'm sorry,
perhaps I'm being unclear.
204
00:07:46,865 --> 00:07:49,367
Although everyone donates
for the breakfast,
205
00:07:49,401 --> 00:07:50,668
The meal itself
206
00:07:50,702 --> 00:07:52,370
Clearly...
207
00:07:52,404 --> 00:07:54,873
Is only for the children to eat.
208
00:07:54,907 --> 00:07:56,740
Yeah, look, I bought
a book of tickets
209
00:07:56,775 --> 00:07:58,042
For a pancake breakfast.
210
00:07:58,076 --> 00:07:59,577
I'm at the
pancake breakfast.
211
00:07:59,678 --> 00:08:00,611
All I want--
212
00:08:00,646 --> 00:08:02,813
And this may come
as no surprise to you--
213
00:08:02,848 --> 00:08:04,248
Are said pancakes.
214
00:08:04,282 --> 00:08:07,418
Don't you feel you might be
a little uncomfortable?
215
00:08:07,453 --> 00:08:09,454
Lady, you don't know me.
I'll be fine.
216
00:08:09,488 --> 00:08:10,254
Well, sir, it's just that...
217
00:08:10,288 --> 00:08:11,288
Look, you know something?
218
00:08:11,323 --> 00:08:12,423
When I bought
these tickets,
219
00:08:12,457 --> 00:08:14,225
Nobody told me it was
for kids. Ask her.
220
00:08:14,259 --> 00:08:15,627
As a matter of fact,
221
00:08:15,661 --> 00:08:16,761
That's the girl
who sold them to me.
222
00:08:16,795 --> 00:08:17,762
Hi, dr. Becker.
223
00:08:17,796 --> 00:08:18,763
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
224
00:08:18,797 --> 00:08:19,797
She's sweet, isn't she?
225
00:08:19,831 --> 00:08:22,667
Yeah, she looks sweet.
226
00:08:22,701 --> 00:08:23,634
Well, I suppose
that we could make
227
00:08:23,669 --> 00:08:25,370
Some room for you
at one of the tables.
228
00:08:25,404 --> 00:08:26,704
Good. Where do you
want me to sit?
229
00:08:26,738 --> 00:08:28,505
Uh, sir? Gum?
230
00:08:28,540 --> 00:08:29,439
Oh.
231
00:08:50,529 --> 00:08:53,698
You snooze, you lose, kid.
232
00:08:53,732 --> 00:08:55,199
Excuse me, boys and girls.
233
00:08:55,301 --> 00:08:57,702
Okay, now that we've
all cleaned our plates,
234
00:08:57,736 --> 00:09:01,039
It's time to find out
who the lucky winner is
235
00:09:01,073 --> 00:09:05,676
Of this year's door prize,
a beautiful new bicycle!
236
00:09:05,710 --> 00:09:08,246
Kids:
Whoa!
237
00:09:08,280 --> 00:09:09,880
Now, in just a moment,
238
00:09:09,915 --> 00:09:12,450
We want you all to
check the bottoms
of your plates,
239
00:09:12,484 --> 00:09:14,885
And whoever finds
a happy face sticker there
240
00:09:14,919 --> 00:09:16,387
Will win the bicycle.
241
00:09:16,421 --> 00:09:18,389
Okay, on the count of three.
Ready?
242
00:09:18,423 --> 00:09:19,757
One...
243
00:09:19,791 --> 00:09:22,026
Ho! Got it right here!
244
00:09:31,770 --> 00:09:33,804
Hey, margaret.
245
00:09:36,408 --> 00:09:38,776
Linda, isn't this
the first day of your vacation?
246
00:09:38,810 --> 00:09:40,177
Uh-huh.
247
00:09:40,211 --> 00:09:42,112
So, what are
you doing here?
248
00:09:42,381 --> 00:09:43,448
I was in the neighborhood,
249
00:09:43,482 --> 00:09:45,816
Thought I'd drop by and see
how you were doing.
250
00:09:47,386 --> 00:09:48,986
So, how you doing?
251
00:09:49,288 --> 00:09:50,254
Fine.
252
00:09:50,489 --> 00:09:51,322
( phone ringing )
253
00:09:51,356 --> 00:09:52,490
Oh, I'll get that.
254
00:09:52,524 --> 00:09:54,492
Doctor's office.
Can I help you?
255
00:09:54,793 --> 00:09:56,861
Sure, I'll check on that
and get right back to you.
256
00:09:58,497 --> 00:10:00,264
I got to be honest, linda.
257
00:10:00,566 --> 00:10:03,000
This is the last place
I would expect to see you
258
00:10:03,034 --> 00:10:04,101
On your day off.
259
00:10:04,269 --> 00:10:05,836
Think about it, margaret.
260
00:10:05,871 --> 00:10:09,406
If you're here working,
where else could you see me?
261
00:10:12,310 --> 00:10:13,377
Morning, margaret.
262
00:10:13,411 --> 00:10:15,546
Oh, hey, did I get a call
from the police
263
00:10:15,580 --> 00:10:17,281
About that parking problem
on my block?
264
00:10:17,315 --> 00:10:18,649
'cause it's still going on.
265
00:10:18,684 --> 00:10:20,718
No, no calls.
Oh.
266
00:10:20,752 --> 00:10:21,886
Uh, what are you
doing with that?
267
00:10:21,920 --> 00:10:23,053
Oh, oh.
268
00:10:23,088 --> 00:10:25,989
I went to the pancake breakfast
this morning.
269
00:10:26,024 --> 00:10:27,425
John, that was supposed
to be for the...
270
00:10:27,459 --> 00:10:28,692
Oh, don't-don't you start, too.
271
00:10:28,726 --> 00:10:30,560
Look, if they didn't
want adults there,
272
00:10:30,595 --> 00:10:32,562
They should've put that
on the ticket.
273
00:10:32,597 --> 00:10:34,498
Fine, but that still
doesn't explain
274
00:10:34,532 --> 00:10:36,834
What you're doing with
a little kid's bike.
275
00:10:36,868 --> 00:10:39,737
Oh, it's not a little kid's
bike, this is my bike.
276
00:10:39,771 --> 00:10:41,238
I won it fair
and square, too.
277
00:10:41,273 --> 00:10:43,007
I had the little
happy face sticker
278
00:10:43,041 --> 00:10:44,375
On the bottom of the plate.
279
00:10:44,410 --> 00:10:46,444
I tell you
something, margaret,
280
00:10:46,478 --> 00:10:49,980
First time in my life,
I'm a winner.
281
00:10:51,617 --> 00:10:53,985
Yeah, nothing screams winner
282
00:10:54,019 --> 00:10:57,054
Like a six-foot man
on a two-foot bike.
283
00:10:57,088 --> 00:11:00,291
Just please tell me
you're not going to
actually keep it.
284
00:11:00,325 --> 00:11:02,760
No, no, of course
I'm not going to keep it.
285
00:11:02,794 --> 00:11:04,028
I'm going to sell it.
286
00:11:04,063 --> 00:11:05,530
Hey, willy wonka,
287
00:11:05,564 --> 00:11:07,198
Back off,
that's mine!
288
00:11:14,806 --> 00:11:17,375
Reggie:
Ow!
289
00:11:17,409 --> 00:11:20,478
I just cut my hand
on the damn can opener.
290
00:11:20,512 --> 00:11:22,280
You realize whose fault
this is, don't you?
291
00:11:22,314 --> 00:11:25,683
Well, I know better than
to suggest it was yours.
292
00:11:25,717 --> 00:11:27,051
Damn right it wasn't mine.
293
00:11:27,086 --> 00:11:28,586
It's mr. Perfect's fault.
294
00:11:28,620 --> 00:11:30,088
He took all my good luck.
295
00:11:30,122 --> 00:11:31,922
You know, reg, you're
obsessing about this.
296
00:11:31,957 --> 00:11:34,658
I bet his "beautiful wife"
is the size of a building
297
00:11:34,693 --> 00:11:36,794
With a face
like a horse.
298
00:11:36,828 --> 00:11:39,663
Why would a building have
a face like a horse?
299
00:11:39,698 --> 00:11:41,365
Two separate
things, bob.
300
00:11:41,399 --> 00:11:45,035
Huge like a building,
ugly like a horse.
301
00:11:45,069 --> 00:11:46,737
"luckiest diner in the world."
302
00:11:46,771 --> 00:11:49,807
Yeah, if you're ever
lucky enough to leave it.
303
00:11:49,841 --> 00:11:53,210
Bob loves big girls.
304
00:11:53,244 --> 00:11:56,881
Hey, jake, I'm going
to get some more
nicotine gum.
305
00:11:56,915 --> 00:11:58,883
Hey, there's only one pack.
306
00:11:58,917 --> 00:12:00,217
Where's the rest?
307
00:12:00,552 --> 00:12:01,252
You bought the rest.
308
00:12:01,286 --> 00:12:02,920
Hey, don't screw around with me.
309
00:12:02,954 --> 00:12:05,056
I have cravings,
I need satisfaction.
310
00:12:05,090 --> 00:12:08,392
Far east massage,
two blocks over.
311
00:12:08,427 --> 00:12:09,927
Ask for number three.
312
00:12:09,961 --> 00:12:12,596
She's a big girl.
313
00:12:12,630 --> 00:12:13,731
Come on, jake.
314
00:12:13,766 --> 00:12:16,768
How's one pack supposed to
get me through the night?
315
00:12:16,802 --> 00:12:19,103
One pack is supposed
to get you though the week.
316
00:12:19,137 --> 00:12:21,005
Reggie:
You realize you're
just trading
317
00:12:21,039 --> 00:12:22,339
One addiction for another?
318
00:12:22,373 --> 00:12:23,207
It's not an addiction.
319
00:12:23,241 --> 00:12:24,374
I just think they're cuddly.
320
00:12:25,944 --> 00:12:28,513
I am not trading
addictions, reg.
321
00:12:28,547 --> 00:12:29,313
This is nicotine.
322
00:12:29,347 --> 00:12:31,215
It's the exact
same addiction.
323
00:12:31,249 --> 00:12:33,117
Truth is
324
00:12:33,151 --> 00:12:34,584
I'm-I'm happy I stopped smoking.
325
00:12:34,619 --> 00:12:37,421
I mean, I feel better
and my clothes don't stink.
326
00:12:37,455 --> 00:12:40,324
And, you know, let's face it,
it's a pretty disgusting habit.
327
00:12:41,459 --> 00:12:43,827
See you, guys.
328
00:12:56,007 --> 00:12:58,609
They make me sick.
329
00:12:59,845 --> 00:13:01,746
Bob, what's the wife
look like?
330
00:13:01,780 --> 00:13:04,114
Jake, I don't know
where to start.
331
00:13:04,149 --> 00:13:06,017
I mean, face
like an angel,
332
00:13:06,051 --> 00:13:08,519
Incredible body,
full pouty lips.
333
00:13:08,553 --> 00:13:12,056
Another 60 pounds and bob
could really go for her.
334
00:13:12,090 --> 00:13:14,057
You know, I'll just bet
mr. Clark hutchinson
335
00:13:14,092 --> 00:13:16,393
Isn't half as rich
as he pretends to be.
336
00:13:16,428 --> 00:13:17,761
Bob saw his watch.
337
00:13:17,795 --> 00:13:20,364
It's like a fake
rolex, but real.
338
00:13:20,398 --> 00:13:22,066
S-so what?
339
00:13:22,100 --> 00:13:23,567
You know how these
rich guys are.
340
00:13:23,601 --> 00:13:25,369
All they really care
about is business.
341
00:13:25,404 --> 00:13:27,538
I bet you he doesn't
even really love her.
342
00:13:27,572 --> 00:13:29,005
Bob:
What a kiss!
343
00:13:29,040 --> 00:13:31,775
I mean, have you
ever seen anything
that romantic?
344
00:13:31,809 --> 00:13:34,578
That's my kiss.
345
00:13:34,612 --> 00:13:35,979
Bob:
He just gave her
346
00:13:36,013 --> 00:13:37,781
The most amazing
bracelet I've ever seen!
347
00:13:37,815 --> 00:13:41,185
That's my bracelet!
348
00:13:41,219 --> 00:13:42,419
So she's beautiful.
So they're rich.
349
00:13:42,454 --> 00:13:44,889
You know what,
there's more to life than that.
350
00:13:44,923 --> 00:13:48,292
Hey, everybody,
we're having a baby!
351
00:13:48,326 --> 00:13:51,462
That's my baby!
352
00:13:51,496 --> 00:13:53,697
That's it, get out!
353
00:13:53,731 --> 00:13:54,798
What?
354
00:13:54,832 --> 00:13:55,933
You heard me, out!
355
00:13:55,967 --> 00:13:58,102
But we haven't
had anything...
356
00:13:58,136 --> 00:14:00,103
Haven't you taken enough
from me?!
357
00:14:00,138 --> 00:14:01,839
If I could...
358
00:14:01,974 --> 00:14:03,040
Go on!
359
00:14:03,075 --> 00:14:04,242
Go!
360
00:14:08,881 --> 00:14:11,081
You know,
it occurs to me
361
00:14:11,115 --> 00:14:14,217
That you just sent the luckiest
guy in the world out of here.
362
00:14:14,252 --> 00:14:17,087
Now, wouldn't it have been
smarter to keep him around here
363
00:14:17,121 --> 00:14:19,390
So some of his good luck
could rub off on us?
364
00:14:19,791 --> 00:14:20,758
Oh, please.
365
00:14:20,792 --> 00:14:23,460
Everyone knows luck doesn't
go in that direction.
366
00:14:23,495 --> 00:14:27,364
Yeah, jake, what
were you thinking?
367
00:14:27,398 --> 00:14:29,433
Reggie:
Who am I kidding? As long
as I'm stuck in this place,
368
00:14:29,467 --> 00:14:32,169
I'm never gonna have
a chance for anything better.
369
00:14:32,203 --> 00:14:33,270
Excuse me,
could I get some change?
370
00:14:33,304 --> 00:14:35,472
Sure.
What do you want, quarters?
371
00:14:35,506 --> 00:14:37,174
Actually,
that's a 50.
372
00:14:37,208 --> 00:14:38,275
Oh, right.
373
00:14:38,309 --> 00:14:39,376
You know, when
I was modeling,
374
00:14:39,411 --> 00:14:40,978
I used to meet guys
all the time.
375
00:14:41,012 --> 00:14:43,047
I think I have this version
on cassette.
376
00:14:43,081 --> 00:14:44,481
Mm-hmm.
377
00:14:44,515 --> 00:14:46,150
Boy, these muffins
look great.
378
00:14:46,184 --> 00:14:48,319
Did you make them yourself?
379
00:14:48,353 --> 00:14:50,754
Huh? Uh, no, they come
three to a can.
380
00:14:50,788 --> 00:14:52,689
You know, between
work and school,
381
00:14:52,724 --> 00:14:54,992
When am I supposed
to have time for a life?
382
00:14:55,027 --> 00:14:56,160
I just don't get how
other people do it.
383
00:14:56,194 --> 00:14:57,962
So, what time do you
close up around here?
384
00:14:57,996 --> 00:15:00,597
7:00. It's on the door.
385
00:15:00,631 --> 00:15:03,033
I mean, it's
just hopeless.
386
00:15:03,067 --> 00:15:04,835
I'm gonna be stuck
in this stupid diner
387
00:15:04,869 --> 00:15:06,069
For the rest
of my life.
388
00:15:06,104 --> 00:15:07,872
You know, I'm kind
of new around here.
389
00:15:07,906 --> 00:15:09,907
I just moved my company
from toronto.
390
00:15:10,008 --> 00:15:11,742
Sure could use someone
to show me around.
391
00:15:11,910 --> 00:15:14,211
Chamber of commerce,
three blocks that way.
392
00:15:14,245 --> 00:15:16,413
Anyway...
393
00:15:16,447 --> 00:15:19,049
Well, okay then,
thanks for the change.
394
00:15:19,083 --> 00:15:20,517
Whatever.
395
00:15:22,654 --> 00:15:26,323
Uh, reg, you realize what just
happened here, right?
396
00:15:26,357 --> 00:15:28,458
Yeah, reg, I think you
kind of blew it.
397
00:15:30,194 --> 00:15:33,597
Oh, my god, you're right.
398
00:15:33,632 --> 00:15:36,333
I could've sold
that guy a muffin.
399
00:15:45,710 --> 00:15:46,810
Good morning, margaret.
400
00:15:46,845 --> 00:15:49,179
Appointments for today
401
00:15:49,213 --> 00:15:50,914
Are all confirmed,
files are on the desk.
402
00:15:50,949 --> 00:15:52,750
I picked up doughnuts
on the way in
403
00:15:52,784 --> 00:15:54,251
And there's fresh coffee.
404
00:15:54,353 --> 00:15:56,519
All right, I'm confused.
405
00:15:56,755 --> 00:15:58,689
You spent all day
here yesterday,
406
00:15:58,723 --> 00:16:00,858
And now you're
here again today.
407
00:16:00,892 --> 00:16:03,527
Are you working
or are you on vacation?
408
00:16:03,562 --> 00:16:05,795
Vacation.
409
00:16:05,830 --> 00:16:10,967
Did you ever think about
just staying on vacation?
410
00:16:11,002 --> 00:16:14,338
Why don't we talk about that
when I get back.
411
00:16:14,372 --> 00:16:15,406
Morning.
412
00:16:15,440 --> 00:16:17,874
Morning, dr. Becker.
413
00:16:17,909 --> 00:16:20,511
Wait a minute,
what are you
doing here?
414
00:16:20,545 --> 00:16:22,012
She's on vacation.
415
00:16:22,047 --> 00:16:23,180
I'm confused.
416
00:16:23,214 --> 00:16:24,548
Yes, thank you!
417
00:16:24,582 --> 00:16:26,050
Linda:
Uh, dr. Becker,
418
00:16:26,084 --> 00:16:28,185
A detective cross
from the 44th precinct called.
419
00:16:28,219 --> 00:16:31,055
He wants you to go down and
talk to him after work today.
420
00:16:31,089 --> 00:16:32,957
Oh, fantastic! The police are
finally going to do something
421
00:16:32,991 --> 00:16:34,859
About the parking problem
on my street.
422
00:16:34,893 --> 00:16:36,360
See, margaret, it
does pay to complain.
423
00:16:36,394 --> 00:16:38,495
It does pay to be
a pain in the ass.
424
00:16:38,529 --> 00:16:40,998
Then why aren't you
a millionaire?
425
00:16:47,472 --> 00:16:49,940
Yeah, come in.
426
00:16:49,975 --> 00:16:50,941
Detective cross.
427
00:16:50,975 --> 00:16:52,109
John becker.
428
00:16:52,143 --> 00:16:53,844
Boy, I can't tell
you how happy I am
429
00:16:53,878 --> 00:16:57,247
We're going to finally fix this
parking problem on my street.
430
00:16:57,281 --> 00:16:58,481
Actually, this isn't
about parking.
431
00:16:58,516 --> 00:16:59,883
This is about an incident
432
00:16:59,918 --> 00:17:02,053
That took place last night
in your neighborhood
433
00:17:02,087 --> 00:17:03,253
That we believe
concerns you.
434
00:17:03,287 --> 00:17:04,488
Really?
Yeah.
435
00:17:04,522 --> 00:17:07,223
Apparently, someone left
a crime scene
436
00:17:07,258 --> 00:17:08,792
After damaging a car.
437
00:17:08,827 --> 00:17:10,661
Well, you know
something,
438
00:17:10,962 --> 00:17:12,729
Come to think of it,
I think I did notice
439
00:17:12,764 --> 00:17:14,665
An extra ding on
my car this morning.
440
00:17:14,699 --> 00:17:15,899
Good work.
441
00:17:16,168 --> 00:17:17,801
This isn't about
your car, dr. Becker.
442
00:17:17,836 --> 00:17:19,970
This is about a car that was
parked outside
443
00:17:20,004 --> 00:17:22,072
An all-night convenience store
last night
444
00:17:22,374 --> 00:17:23,607
Over on kaden avenue.
445
00:17:23,641 --> 00:17:25,509
You wouldn't know anything
446
00:17:25,577 --> 00:17:27,410
About that, would you?
447
00:17:27,479 --> 00:17:29,446
Me?
448
00:17:29,481 --> 00:17:31,181
No, no, I was
home all night.
449
00:17:31,215 --> 00:17:33,149
Uh, there's no
way I could've...
450
00:17:33,184 --> 00:17:35,118
Oh, well, wait a sec.
451
00:17:35,152 --> 00:17:38,121
Are-are you suggesting
I had something
to do with that?
452
00:17:38,155 --> 00:17:39,556
Because that's absurd.
453
00:17:39,891 --> 00:17:42,960
Look, I am, I am a
respected member
of this community.
454
00:17:42,994 --> 00:17:45,529
I mean, you can ask,
you can ask...
455
00:17:45,564 --> 00:17:46,897
What's that?
456
00:17:48,200 --> 00:17:52,069
Surveillance tape from
the store parking lot.
457
00:17:52,103 --> 00:17:53,737
Really?
458
00:17:53,771 --> 00:17:55,439
You know, actually,
come to think of it,
459
00:17:55,473 --> 00:17:57,807
You know, I did pop out
for a moment last night.
460
00:17:57,842 --> 00:17:59,877
Yes, I did.
I, uh...
461
00:17:59,911 --> 00:18:01,378
I had to go get
some nicotine gum.
462
00:18:01,413 --> 00:18:04,181
Boy, I tell you, this stuff
really reduces the old craving.
463
00:18:04,215 --> 00:18:06,150
I'm proud to say
that I've managed to stay
464
00:18:06,184 --> 00:18:08,318
Clean and smoke-free
for almost three whole days now.
465
00:18:08,353 --> 00:18:10,387
Do you smoke, detective?
Do-do you smoke?
466
00:18:21,932 --> 00:18:25,335
Well, at least we know
you're being completely honest.
467
00:18:25,370 --> 00:18:26,937
( guilty laughter )
468
00:18:26,972 --> 00:18:28,705
How can you tell
that's even me?
469
00:18:28,739 --> 00:18:30,107
You're wearing
the exact same raincoat
470
00:18:30,141 --> 00:18:31,375
You're wearing right now.
471
00:18:31,409 --> 00:18:33,143
That doesn't
prove anything.
472
00:18:33,178 --> 00:18:34,811
I wear this coat every day.
473
00:18:39,817 --> 00:18:42,452
You see there
by the car, dr. Becker?
474
00:18:42,487 --> 00:18:45,355
Do you recognize
that little kid's bike?
475
00:18:45,390 --> 00:18:46,890
Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa.
476
00:18:46,925 --> 00:18:49,093
I did not steal that,
if that's what
you're implying.
477
00:18:49,127 --> 00:18:52,295
You know, I won that
bike fair and square
at the pancake breakfast.
478
00:18:52,330 --> 00:18:54,798
I had that little yellow
sticker on the bottom...
479
00:18:54,833 --> 00:18:56,700
I-I had to ride that bike
to the store last night,
480
00:18:56,735 --> 00:18:57,735
Because some idiot
double-parked in front of
481
00:18:57,769 --> 00:18:59,102
My car so I
couldn't get out.
482
00:18:59,137 --> 00:19:01,505
Which you people don't seem
to give a rat's ass about!
483
00:19:01,540 --> 00:19:04,241
I'll tell you something, I did
not, I don't care what you say,
484
00:19:04,275 --> 00:19:05,576
I did not damage anybody's car.
485
00:19:17,255 --> 00:19:19,123
You know, it's customary
to leave a note
486
00:19:19,157 --> 00:19:21,258
When you scratch
an unattended car.
487
00:19:21,292 --> 00:19:23,660
Come to think of it,
it's the law.
488
00:19:23,694 --> 00:19:24,894
Oh, come on, I fell.
489
00:19:24,929 --> 00:19:28,332
I mean, clearly I didn't know
I scratched the car, I mean...
490
00:19:41,078 --> 00:19:45,048
Well, that was sort of nice
of me, don't you think?
491
00:19:52,090 --> 00:19:55,259
Now, look at you throwing
your cigarette down there.
492
00:19:55,293 --> 00:19:57,394
That kind of looks like
littering to me.
493
00:19:59,997 --> 00:20:02,433
Gee, I'm looking
real hard here, dr. Becker,
494
00:20:02,467 --> 00:20:05,436
And I don't see you wearing
a helmet, either.
495
00:20:05,470 --> 00:20:07,604
So let's review, shall we?
496
00:20:07,638 --> 00:20:08,438
So far, we've got you
497
00:20:08,473 --> 00:20:10,707
For leaving the scene
of an accident,
498
00:20:10,741 --> 00:20:12,743
Littering,
and not wearing a helmet.
499
00:20:14,545 --> 00:20:18,315
Yeah, I am appalled,
absolutely appalled!
500
00:20:18,349 --> 00:20:20,149
I mean, big new york city
police department.
501
00:20:20,184 --> 00:20:21,918
You put all your
resources together
502
00:20:21,952 --> 00:20:24,120
And y-you caught
the big criminal mastermind!
503
00:20:24,154 --> 00:20:26,055
I mean, what else
have you got on me?
504
00:20:26,090 --> 00:20:28,057
Video footage of me at home
in my underwear
505
00:20:28,092 --> 00:20:29,993
Ripping the tag off my mattress?
506
00:20:30,027 --> 00:20:31,895
I mean, is this
why I pay my taxes?!
507
00:20:31,929 --> 00:20:34,465
So you techno-wizards can get
your little spy cameras
508
00:20:34,499 --> 00:20:37,467
And your magnifying glasses
and track down a litterbug?
509
00:20:37,501 --> 00:20:39,369
Oh, come on, please!
510
00:20:39,403 --> 00:20:41,171
You know what else pisses
me off about you fellows...
511
00:20:41,205 --> 00:20:43,040
Before you finish,
512
00:20:43,074 --> 00:20:44,574
You might want
to watch this.
513
00:20:47,178 --> 00:20:49,112
What?
514
00:20:49,147 --> 00:20:52,815
What am I looking at?
515
00:20:52,850 --> 00:20:53,750
What?
516
00:21:04,095 --> 00:21:06,429
Never mind.
37180
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof