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Whaa?
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Ah!
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Oh! Oh!
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Shut up!
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00:00:20,400 --> 00:00:21,480
Argh!
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Argh!
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Hello, thank you.
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I'm Greg Davies and I'm
a very nice man.
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You'll often find me whistling
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and skipping down the street,
tra la la la la la!
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I may stop, scoop up some abandoned
dog mess,
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lead a senior citizen across
the road.
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00:00:50,120 --> 00:00:53,200
I may restrain an errant youth
and correct his behaviour.
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00:00:53,240 --> 00:00:56,440
But even nice people need
a release sometimes,
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somewhere to let out
supressed anger,
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a howl in the night,
a place where darkness can run amok.
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Welcome to Taskmaster!
18
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CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
19
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And the very best of luck to...
Dara O Briain.
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CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
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Fern Brady.
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John Kearns.
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Munya Chawawa.
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And Sarah Millican.
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And to my left, a man who told me in
confidence he's scared
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of three things - slugs,
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small spaces
and women being allowed to vote.
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LAUGHTER
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Little Alex Horne!
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APPLAUSE
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Prize task time.
Yes, it is
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and it's something we all think
about once a week
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because you've asked them this week
to bring in
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the thing that you most want on
a Sunday morning.
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Ooh. Yes,
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I didn't have to think too long
about this one. You know...
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00:01:59,840 --> 00:02:02,280
So Greg will give
a big five to his fave
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and then at the end of the show
the person with the most points
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will take home all the ingredients
for a perfect Sunday morning. OK?
40
00:02:07,320 --> 00:02:08,960
Yes. Good. Hello, Sarah.
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What's your perfect thing for
a Sunday morning?
42
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Well, I stay in hotels a lot on tour
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and people in hotels think you
should be up at eight o'clock -
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cos they're dicks.
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And I always have a "do not disturb"
sign on my door in a hotel.
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I never want my room cleaned cos I'm
quite a dirty person.
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So I've brought my own
"do not disturb" sign.
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There it is.
That's the first prize on offer.
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I think there's nothing more
aggressive than
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a do not disturb sign that doesn't
match everybody else's
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do not disturb sign. Wow.
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Hmm. I can't tell if
the bar is high or low.
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Well, the rage is what I enjoyed.
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Oh, you always do, yeah.
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Well, we're moving onto
John now who's come last in
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the last two ones of these.
Hello, John.
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The very best of luck to you.
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Thank you. It's a business card.
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Oh...
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LAUGHTER
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Oh, and Fern's next, is she?
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Do you want to see?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
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It says "Know what you want
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00:03:07,080 --> 00:03:09,840
and have the confidence to go
after it." Yeah.
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LAUGHTER
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Look if you're walking down
the street
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and someone gave you that... Yeah.
That, you know...
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Hello, yes, bang.
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00:03:21,480 --> 00:03:23,800
Know what you want and have the
confidence to go after it.
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00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:27,480
A, you're keeping that for
the rest of your life
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00:03:27,520 --> 00:03:30,640
and it's also, it's all you're
thinking about all day.
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I would like it, I think, if someone
gave me that.
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Yeah, look, everyone reading that
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00:03:34,320 --> 00:03:36,280
know what you want, so that's
tricky, but...
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Yeah, and then have
the confidence to go after it.
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00:03:38,600 --> 00:03:40,840
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, we've read it.
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Um, Fern what have you brought in?
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It's my favourite breakfast soup.
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This is her favourite breakfast
soup. Lovely.
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It's like a savoury tofu pudding,
that people have in China.
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I think Alex has some.
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00:03:56,040 --> 00:03:59,240
Here you are. There's the slop. Yes.
Try it.
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Try it?
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IN MANDARIN: Please eat.
85
00:04:01,920 --> 00:04:03,120
Well, obviously.
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00:04:04,920 --> 00:04:05,920
Oh.
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Fishy. It's very spicy
and quite crunchy. Can I try some?
88
00:04:10,680 --> 00:04:12,280
Yes, please do.
Oh, my God.
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00:04:12,320 --> 00:04:14,880
Greg, I thought you weren't going to
try it, cos aren't you from
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Shrewsbury or something?
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00:04:16,360 --> 00:04:18,680
LAUGHTER
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00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:23,280
You seem like you just eat roasts.
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00:04:23,320 --> 00:04:26,360
LAUGHTER
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00:04:28,840 --> 00:04:31,400
Oh, God, yeah. That is...
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It is, isn't it?
Tastes like a farmyard.
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00:04:35,480 --> 00:04:38,080
Well, you'd like that, cos
of where you're from.
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It's the flavour
of hopelessness.
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00:04:40,560 --> 00:04:41,840
Um, Munya.
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Hello. I have brought in
the Super Grater 3000.
100
00:04:47,520 --> 00:04:49,440
Yes, here it is. The Super Grater.
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Oh, my God!
102
00:04:50,600 --> 00:04:53,240
He's grabbed
a grater on his way out the house.
103
00:04:53,280 --> 00:04:54,840
It's not, it's not a grater.
104
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This thing here is essentially
a cheese grater of the foot.
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Ugh!
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It can be used on wet and dry feet.
107
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I mean, it's one of
the bleakest images...
108
00:05:05,920 --> 00:05:07,920
It's the bleakest image
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I've had since I imaged sharing
breakfast with Fern.
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All right, Dara.
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This should be
a piece of piss, I imagine?
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I brought in a massive segmented
frying pan. And here it is.
113
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I find, look, that's supposed
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to be doing, you know, rashers in
one place,
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eggs in another, beans in another.
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00:05:25,680 --> 00:05:26,720
I'm sorry, Dara,
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are you under the impression
I haven't got one of these?
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I've got one.
119
00:05:31,440 --> 00:05:34,760
I find, often even on something like
a lighter breakfast, I like
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00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:36,400
a little bit of fresh food.
121
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Got some pineapples, cereal, er...
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I'm aware as well that any time
you do anything on television
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that looks like you've wasted food,
124
00:05:44,440 --> 00:05:46,800
people get very angry about that,
like it should be noted that
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00:05:46,840 --> 00:05:49,480
the pineapple and
the yoghurt go back in the fridge.
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00:05:49,520 --> 00:05:51,640
The bagel went back in
the bread basket.
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00:05:51,680 --> 00:05:53,840
The kids ate the Cheerios
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00:05:53,880 --> 00:05:56,480
and then, to get rid of
the orange juice, I got a straw
129
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so that we weren't wasting any food
at any stage.
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00:05:58,600 --> 00:06:00,280
Oh, it was you that sucked it up?
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00:06:00,320 --> 00:06:01,800
It wasn't that old man?
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00:06:01,840 --> 00:06:05,240
LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
133
00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:11,080
Um, all right, then. Ready?
134
00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:13,200
Uh, yes, right. Where we starting?
One?
135
00:06:13,240 --> 00:06:16,080
You know where were starting. We're
starting with old smooth feet.
136
00:06:16,120 --> 00:06:17,320
Ooh.
137
00:06:17,360 --> 00:06:18,600
Who's that?
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Is that his actual nickname?
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LAUGHTER
140
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I...I'm giving–poor old
Munya one point.
141
00:06:28,520 --> 00:06:30,080
OK. Munya, one point, well done.
142
00:06:30,120 --> 00:06:32,320
Sarah's rage delighted me.
143
00:06:32,360 --> 00:06:35,480
Oh, God, it's between Sarah
and the Chinese soup.
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For the sake of hotel staff,
I'm going to give her two points.
145
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OK, two to Sarah.
146
00:06:41,960 --> 00:06:44,640
Yeah, unbelievably, that soup gets
three points.
147
00:06:44,680 --> 00:06:45,680
I mean...
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00:06:46,760 --> 00:06:49,800
Now, this is where things
get controversial.
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00:06:49,840 --> 00:06:52,720
The truth is, if someone gave me
that business card in
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00:06:52,760 --> 00:06:56,240
the street I honestly think it would
make my day. What?
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00:06:56,280 --> 00:06:58,320
So, against all odds
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00:06:58,360 --> 00:07:01,040
and it just shows you how deeply
unfair this show is...
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00:07:01,080 --> 00:07:03,160
LAUGHTER
154
00:07:03,200 --> 00:07:06,480
..I'm giving John Kearns five points
and I'll stand by it.
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00:07:06,520 --> 00:07:08,440
Right, so it's four points to Dara
O Briain
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00:07:08,480 --> 00:07:10,240
but five huh, to John Kearns.
There it is!
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00:07:10,280 --> 00:07:13,280
CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
158
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Thank you.
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00:07:15,280 --> 00:07:16,680
Very good. All right,
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00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:18,960
my furry chum, what's next on
the agenda?
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Well, it's a gritty team task, Greg.
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Hello, Sarah.
Hi, Alex. Hello, Munya. Hi, Alex.
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00:07:39,160 --> 00:07:40,480
Hello, Fern. Hiya.
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00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:45,320
Fern, wait for your team.
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00:07:45,360 --> 00:07:47,880
Oh, sorry! Did I shut
the door on them?
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00:07:47,920 --> 00:07:50,800
Yeah.
I'm not really a team player.
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Secure the perimeter.
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Place half your hands on half
your hips...
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..and leave them there until
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00:07:57,320 --> 00:07:59,640
the second part of
the task is over. Also...
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00:07:59,680 --> 00:08:03,520
..the hands that are on hips
must only touch those hips...
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00:08:03,560 --> 00:08:06,280
..until the second part of
the task is over.
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00:08:06,320 --> 00:08:08,160
We've to touch each other?
174
00:08:08,200 --> 00:08:09,840
You can touch each other.
175
00:08:09,880 --> 00:08:11,160
You have two minutes.
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00:08:11,200 --> 00:08:14,120
Read it again.
Yeah, I need to...
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00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:18,680
Place half your hands. So one hand
on one hip. On half your hips.
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00:08:18,720 --> 00:08:22,000
I don't understand this!
I thought it meant half of my hand.
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00:08:22,040 --> 00:08:23,640
Yeah, but collectively.
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00:08:23,680 --> 00:08:25,640
And leave them there until
the second part of
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00:08:25,680 --> 00:08:27,520
the task is over.
So, until it's done.
182
00:08:27,560 --> 00:08:29,840
Depending what the task is, we might
be making it very difficult
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00:08:29,880 --> 00:08:32,720
for ourselves by all having one hand
where it could be much easier if
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00:08:32,760 --> 00:08:35,080
one person to have two hands.
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00:08:35,120 --> 00:08:36,880
We should keep one pair
of hands free.
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00:08:36,920 --> 00:08:39,240
Oh! Oh, you're so good at this!
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00:08:39,280 --> 00:08:40,560
I think your time starts now.
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00:08:40,600 --> 00:08:42,760
Like a conga?
Are we congaing this, right?
189
00:08:42,800 --> 00:08:45,920
So do you wanna conga me?
I'll conga you!
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00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:49,200
OK, fine. You have my consent. Yeah?
There we go.
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00:08:49,240 --> 00:08:51,480
I have your consent!
Yeah, my hips are unhanded.
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00:08:51,520 --> 00:08:54,080
And my hips are definitely
being handled.
WHISTLE BLOWS
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00:08:54,120 --> 00:08:56,000
At the moment there are four hands
on four hips.
194
00:08:56,040 --> 00:08:57,920
Yes, take your hand...that hand is
free.
195
00:08:57,960 --> 00:09:01,760
One hand on your hip. And Dara still
has both hands on...no!
196
00:09:01,800 --> 00:09:03,240
Take the hand off her!
197
00:09:03,280 --> 00:09:05,440
My hands are here.
198
00:09:06,640 --> 00:09:08,520
ALEX: You're fine, John.
So that hand's on that hip.
199
00:09:08,560 --> 00:09:10,240
FERN: I thought...I didn't
understand it
200
00:09:10,280 --> 00:09:13,360
but John really doesn't
understand it!
201
00:09:13,400 --> 00:09:17,000
I do understand it! With your hands
on those hips at all times, put
202
00:09:17,040 --> 00:09:19,520
the most sand in
the shopping trolley.
203
00:09:19,560 --> 00:09:20,640
You may only move
204
00:09:20,680 --> 00:09:23,440
the shopping trolley when there is
one minute left on
205
00:09:23,480 --> 00:09:25,480
the clock. Oh, my God.
You have ten minutes.
206
00:09:25,520 --> 00:09:27,040
Your time starts now.
207
00:09:27,080 --> 00:09:28,520
So where is the sand?
208
00:09:28,560 --> 00:09:29,680
Exactly. Where is the sand?
209
00:09:29,720 --> 00:09:30,960
Right, let's go look for the sand.
210
00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:33,240
OK, we got to go look
for it. OK.
211
00:09:33,280 --> 00:09:35,000
John, don't put your...
212
00:09:35,040 --> 00:09:37,600
You can only have one hand on my
hip.
213
00:09:37,640 --> 00:09:39,760
How do you not understand that?
Sorry.
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00:09:39,800 --> 00:09:42,240
APPLAUSE
215
00:09:46,400 --> 00:09:48,480
Team of three,
talk me through your tactics.
216
00:09:48,520 --> 00:09:50,080
DARA SIGHS
217
00:09:52,160 --> 00:09:54,640
We got the idea, hands have
to be on hips.
218
00:09:54,680 --> 00:09:56,280
Yeah, absolutely.
219
00:09:56,320 --> 00:09:59,360
But we forgot that they could just
be our own hips... Yeah.
220
00:09:59,400 --> 00:10:01,480
And that was probably
the most obvious thing to do, just
221
00:10:01,520 --> 00:10:03,880
for one person to stand like that
for the entire task.
222
00:10:03,920 --> 00:10:06,680
For some reason we, we felt that we
should human-centipede it.
223
00:10:06,720 --> 00:10:09,160
LAUGHTER
224
00:10:09,200 --> 00:10:12,960
But I think the fact that we all
didn't realise that we could just
225
00:10:13,000 --> 00:10:14,840
have one person doing that
226
00:10:14,880 --> 00:10:17,400
means that maybe the task
wasn't that well written.
227
00:10:17,440 --> 00:10:18,480
Yeah.
228
00:10:18,520 --> 00:10:19,760
AUDIENCE: Ooh!
229
00:10:19,800 --> 00:10:23,160
Well, listen I don't write them,
so...
230
00:10:24,480 --> 00:10:28,000
We were hoping for one of
the teams to be stupid enough
231
00:10:28,040 --> 00:10:29,640
to put their hands
on each other's hips
232
00:10:29,680 --> 00:10:32,240
but we weren't expecting everyone...
SARAH LAUGHS
233
00:10:34,680 --> 00:10:37,040
It felt like it was more of
a team when we were together.
234
00:10:37,080 --> 00:10:39,320
Yeah, we did both.
It was divide and conga.
235
00:10:39,360 --> 00:10:43,200
LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
236
00:10:46,200 --> 00:10:47,560
Wow.
237
00:10:48,640 --> 00:10:51,160
OK. Do you want to carry on? Yes.
Do you want a couple of minutes?
238
00:10:51,200 --> 00:10:52,960
No, go to VT.
Are you sure?
239
00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:54,240
Go to VT. OK.
240
00:10:54,280 --> 00:10:57,560
Well, we're gonna see
the Team Of Two first of all,
241
00:10:57,600 --> 00:11:00,440
so here's how Sarah
and Munya got on.
242
00:11:00,480 --> 00:11:05,200
It's really hard
to not do da-da, da, da, da, da, da.
243
00:11:05,240 --> 00:11:07,720
Hey. You may only move the shopping
trolley when there's
244
00:11:07,760 --> 00:11:10,200
one minute left on the clock.
245
00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:11,960
We need to get the
trolley sand-proofed
246
00:11:12,000 --> 00:11:13,760
so it doesn't all leak out.
247
00:11:13,800 --> 00:11:16,560
They've got rid of all the buckets.
248
00:11:16,600 --> 00:11:17,920
There you go.
249
00:11:17,960 --> 00:11:20,200
Right, so I'm gonna scoop.
250
00:11:20,240 --> 00:11:22,240
Good work!
251
00:11:22,280 --> 00:11:24,360
One pot's not gonna be enough,
is it?
252
00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:26,360
Open your legs,
cos I need to swing this.
253
00:11:26,400 --> 00:11:28,000
SHE LAUGHS
254
00:11:28,040 --> 00:11:30,120
Just slide it in, yeah? Yeah.
255
00:11:30,160 --> 00:11:34,320
Yeah, cos the thing is,
sometimes I lose my head.
256
00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:35,880
How many minutes have we got left,
Alex?
257
00:11:35,920 --> 00:11:38,160
Two minutes and 48.
Two minutes? OK. Shit. And 48.
258
00:11:38,200 --> 00:11:40,880
I'm gonna double-quick. Yeah.
Left around. Don't let me go.
259
00:11:40,920 --> 00:11:43,400
No, not letting you go.
260
00:11:43,440 --> 00:11:45,320
Argh! Oh, are you all right?
261
00:11:45,360 --> 00:11:47,680
I crushed my fingers. Keep going.
262
00:11:47,720 --> 00:11:50,280
You're such a hero. You've got
one minute and 50 seconds.
263
00:11:50,320 --> 00:11:53,000
We're gonna have to really run
for the trolley, you know.
Yeah, good work.
264
00:11:53,040 --> 00:11:54,560
Count us down when it's ten, yeah?
265
00:11:54,600 --> 00:11:56,760
OK.
As in one minute ten.
266
00:11:56,800 --> 00:11:57,800
It's now one minute ten.
267
00:11:57,840 --> 00:12:00,080
Let's get to the trolley.
Ready? Go, go.
268
00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:02,480
Go, go, go!
269
00:12:02,520 --> 00:12:04,520
Good, good,
good, good, good.
270
00:12:04,560 --> 00:12:05,560
OK.
271
00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:07,120
Argh!
272
00:12:07,160 --> 00:12:09,800
Go, go, go! Go, go!
273
00:12:11,880 --> 00:12:13,040
Whoa!
274
00:12:13,080 --> 00:12:14,240
Are you all right?
275
00:12:15,880 --> 00:12:17,600
How long? 25 seconds.
276
00:12:24,760 --> 00:12:27,160
OK, let's get it.
You get in first.
277
00:12:27,200 --> 00:12:28,960
Oh!
278
00:12:29,000 --> 00:12:30,960
Hold that open.
279
00:12:34,160 --> 00:12:35,880
How long?
280
00:12:35,920 --> 00:12:38,440
How long?
WHISTLE BLOWS
281
00:12:38,480 --> 00:12:39,480
Ah, shit!
282
00:12:39,520 --> 00:12:42,200
You didn't even count us down.
283
00:12:42,240 --> 00:12:45,000
You didn't even count down.
I said count at ten.
284
00:12:45,040 --> 00:12:47,520
One minute ten, you said.
285
00:12:47,560 --> 00:12:49,680
Oh, no! So close.
286
00:12:49,720 --> 00:12:51,520
You've got one bucket in.
287
00:12:54,960 --> 00:12:56,840
Can I let go now? It's up to you.
288
00:12:56,880 --> 00:13:00,800
APPLAUSE
289
00:13:00,840 --> 00:13:03,760
I would have liked a separate camera
just on Sarah
290
00:13:03,800 --> 00:13:06,240
and her contribution to the task,
which was this...
291
00:13:09,080 --> 00:13:10,760
I had a lovely time.
292
00:13:10,800 --> 00:13:14,000
It was sort of permission
to touch someone. Yeah.
293
00:13:14,040 --> 00:13:15,320
It's nice.
294
00:13:15,360 --> 00:13:17,960
Munya said you could be more
rough with his hips.
295
00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:22,200
LAUGHTER
296
00:13:22,240 --> 00:13:25,520
Next... Well, actually,
before we see the Team Of Three,
297
00:13:25,560 --> 00:13:29,080
one of them would like me to play
a different video first.
298
00:13:29,120 --> 00:13:31,280
Mm-hm. So I'm gonna show you this.
OK.
299
00:13:35,160 --> 00:13:37,240
Hi, John.
300
00:13:40,040 --> 00:13:41,960
Hiya. You OK?
301
00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:43,400
Er, yeah.
302
00:13:45,920 --> 00:13:49,640
TINKLING MUSIC PLAYS
303
00:13:49,680 --> 00:13:52,240
LAUGHING: Oh, God, what the fuck
are you doing?
304
00:13:52,280 --> 00:13:53,280
Sh!
305
00:13:56,280 --> 00:13:57,600
Oh, man!
306
00:13:59,400 --> 00:14:01,760
Sabotage your team...
307
00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:02,960
What?!
308
00:14:03,000 --> 00:14:04,640
..in the next task.
309
00:14:04,680 --> 00:14:09,840
If your team loses the task,
you win five points.
310
00:14:10,920 --> 00:14:13,960
If your team wins the task,
311
00:14:14,000 --> 00:14:16,400
you win zero points.
312
00:14:18,760 --> 00:14:22,400
If your team accuses you
of sabotaging the task..
313
00:14:22,440 --> 00:14:27,400
WHEEZING LAUGH:
..you win zero points.
314
00:14:27,440 --> 00:14:30,320
So, the only way you win is if you
lose.
315
00:14:30,360 --> 00:14:31,680
You understand?
316
00:14:31,720 --> 00:14:34,200
Yeah, well, I do understand, sadly.
317
00:14:34,240 --> 00:14:36,800
That's... Do you know what?
That's nasty.
318
00:14:36,840 --> 00:14:38,760
Well, I'll let you think about that
for a bit, John.
319
00:14:38,800 --> 00:14:40,800
Oh, man.
Good luck.
320
00:14:40,840 --> 00:14:42,200
Yeah, yeah.
321
00:14:43,600 --> 00:14:44,920
Oh, dear.
322
00:14:47,440 --> 00:14:49,880
He's not even making eye contact
with us now,
323
00:14:49,920 --> 00:14:53,280
and this feels like one of your
relatives have been talking
324
00:14:53,320 --> 00:14:56,400
to the FBI about you and then just
silently lifts up their T-shirt
325
00:14:56,440 --> 00:14:59,280
and there's a microphone pack
on their body.
326
00:14:59,320 --> 00:15:01,120
Yeah, can I say, it's actually
kind of a relief,
327
00:15:01,160 --> 00:15:03,120
cos at the time I thought
he was an IDIOT.
328
00:15:03,160 --> 00:15:07,240
LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
329
00:15:10,760 --> 00:15:12,280
Oh, fucking hell.
330
00:15:13,360 --> 00:15:16,760
John's been sitting on this
for four months now.
331
00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:19,160
You had such a go at me.
332
00:15:19,200 --> 00:15:21,200
We're set for something special
here, aren't we?
333
00:15:21,240 --> 00:15:23,520
Yeah, but were gonna go to...
I know, were gonna go to a break.
334
00:15:23,560 --> 00:15:28,040
I mean, when you come back,
there'll be four chairs.
335
00:15:28,080 --> 00:15:30,440
OK, I've been working on
a new end-of-part link for you,
336
00:15:30,480 --> 00:15:31,880
and here it is.
337
00:15:31,920 --> 00:15:33,440
BYE!
338
00:15:33,480 --> 00:15:34,480
APPLAUSE
339
00:15:42,840 --> 00:15:45,480
Hello, welcome back
to Taskmaster,
340
00:15:45,520 --> 00:15:48,840
where a solo sabotage task
has been set.
341
00:15:48,880 --> 00:15:52,120
Yes, it's true. John Kearns was
given a secret task by me
342
00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:54,720
in a really cool, underhand
sort of way.
343
00:15:54,760 --> 00:15:57,520
The legit team task is to get
the most sand into
344
00:15:57,560 --> 00:15:59,720
the shopping trolley while they have
half their hands on
345
00:15:59,760 --> 00:16:02,480
half their hips. If John's team
loses the task,
346
00:16:02,520 --> 00:16:05,040
John will win five fat points
all to himself,
347
00:16:05,080 --> 00:16:06,800
but if his team wins,
he gets nothing.
348
00:16:06,840 --> 00:16:08,960
If you're Dara and Fern,
it's pretty cruel.
349
00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:11,600
If you're everyone else watching,
it's pretty exciting.
350
00:16:11,640 --> 00:16:14,840
So, here's how the
Team Of Three got on.
351
00:16:16,400 --> 00:16:18,640
How fast do you want me to walk?
352
00:16:18,680 --> 00:16:20,240
I'd say faster than this.
353
00:16:20,280 --> 00:16:22,520
OK, well, I... It's in case...
354
00:16:22,560 --> 00:16:25,000
Dafty in the middle.
355
00:16:25,040 --> 00:16:26,480
Er...
We need containers.
356
00:16:26,520 --> 00:16:28,160
Is there a bucket,
a bucket or something?
357
00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:29,480
Eight minutes.
358
00:16:29,520 --> 00:16:31,000
Hold on, John.
359
00:16:31,040 --> 00:16:34,240
Just move up nearer to my arse.
360
00:16:34,280 --> 00:16:36,880
You're crouching, you're crouching.
361
00:16:38,640 --> 00:16:40,960
You're just spreading it around.
No, no, no.
362
00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:43,520
Right, there's the pack of sand.
363
00:16:43,560 --> 00:16:45,760
There's so many better ways we could
have done this.
364
00:16:45,800 --> 00:16:48,240
I mean, that's the one thing
I have here, is time to reflect.
365
00:16:48,280 --> 00:16:50,160
I wouldn't complain, Dara,
I think just...
366
00:16:50,200 --> 00:16:51,440
You're doing a lot of complaining
367
00:16:51,480 --> 00:16:53,600
and I'm doing a lot of
the labour here.
368
00:16:53,640 --> 00:16:56,080
Honestly, you're both doing
a brilliant job there.
369
00:17:00,840 --> 00:17:02,680
I'm just reflecting.
370
00:17:02,720 --> 00:17:06,320
There's a much better way of
doing... John!
371
00:17:06,360 --> 00:17:08,120
Why did you do that?
372
00:17:08,160 --> 00:17:10,640
Oh, my God, did you knock it over?
Why did you do that?!
373
00:17:10,680 --> 00:17:12,320
It goes back on, look.
374
00:17:12,360 --> 00:17:14,840
OK. OK. Sorry, Fern.
375
00:17:14,880 --> 00:17:17,040
What if we get one
of these plant pots?
376
00:17:17,080 --> 00:17:19,040
Get that bucket over there,
yeah. How long's left?
377
00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:20,840
This is very...
You're got four minutes 20.
378
00:17:20,880 --> 00:17:22,800
Oh, brilliant.
This is the best plan.
379
00:17:22,840 --> 00:17:24,680
Hold on, John.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
380
00:17:24,720 --> 00:17:26,880
You coming in? Yeah.
381
00:17:26,920 --> 00:17:28,080
Here we go.
382
00:17:28,120 --> 00:17:29,600
How you doing, Dara?
383
00:17:29,640 --> 00:17:33,080
I mean, I would sooner not be in
this exact position
384
00:17:33,120 --> 00:17:34,880
for the entire task. Oh...
385
00:17:34,920 --> 00:17:37,040
Oh, hang on, watch the bucket,
it's sat behind me.
386
00:17:37,080 --> 00:17:40,440
I don't wanna knock over
the bucket of sand.
387
00:17:40,480 --> 00:17:42,200
You have to go that way,
you have to go that way.
388
00:17:42,240 --> 00:17:44,360
John, you have to go that way.
John, you have to go that way.
389
00:17:44,400 --> 00:17:47,120
Well, I don't wanna knock over...
You don't wanna knock it over.
No, no, no.
390
00:17:47,160 --> 00:17:49,440
John, be really careful because
you're... There we go.
391
00:17:49,480 --> 00:17:51,280
Where, where, where, where's the,
er...
392
00:17:51,320 --> 00:17:53,760
Careful, careful. Careful,
Careful, careful, careful!
393
00:17:53,800 --> 00:17:56,320
Oh, my God, we almost lost the hat.
Again.
394
00:17:56,360 --> 00:17:58,200
Right, another bucket.
Quick, another bucket.
395
00:17:58,240 --> 00:17:59,640
I don't know if there's time,
you know.
396
00:17:59,680 --> 00:18:02,200
I think we should just make our
way back. We've got time!
397
00:18:02,240 --> 00:18:03,800
Hold on, John!
398
00:18:03,840 --> 00:18:06,120
Under the rope, under the rope!
399
00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:07,760
Ah, fuck's sake.
400
00:18:07,800 --> 00:18:09,520
There's a hole in the bucket.
401
00:18:09,560 --> 00:18:11,840
Oh, no.
402
00:18:11,880 --> 00:18:13,360
I think we should just go back.
403
00:18:13,400 --> 00:18:14,760
I just wanna get...
404
00:18:14,800 --> 00:18:18,280
We can't move it until at the one
minute bell strikes.
405
00:18:18,320 --> 00:18:20,120
How long?
You've now got one minute.
406
00:18:20,160 --> 00:18:22,360
One minute. Can we move it?
Yes.
407
00:18:22,400 --> 00:18:24,600
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
408
00:18:24,640 --> 00:18:26,280
Right, come on, come on, come on.
409
00:18:26,320 --> 00:18:27,800
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
410
00:18:30,280 --> 00:18:32,720
See, this is when it all pays off.
411
00:18:33,760 --> 00:18:36,880
Do we have to put it back anywhere?
No, you don't have to move it back.
412
00:18:36,920 --> 00:18:39,240
All the information's on the task
there, John.
413
00:18:39,280 --> 00:18:42,600
WHEEZING LAUGHTER
414
00:18:42,640 --> 00:18:44,520
20 seconds, John.
415
00:18:44,560 --> 00:18:46,840
When there is one minute left on
the clock...
416
00:18:46,880 --> 00:18:48,960
Put the, put the hat... Put the...
Sorry.
417
00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:51,240
Touch me.
Put that in there.
418
00:18:51,280 --> 00:18:53,480
What? No, what are you doing?
It has to be in the trolley.
419
00:18:53,520 --> 00:18:56,040
It's just in the trolley. Oh, I
thought it had to be in one thing.
420
00:18:56,080 --> 00:18:57,280
No. Ten seconds.
421
00:18:58,360 --> 00:19:00,960
It says it has to be in one.
No it doesn't say... What? Does it?
422
00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:03,280
Yeah, yeah.
Wait, does it say that?
423
00:19:03,320 --> 00:19:05,400
Does it say that? It does!
424
00:19:05,440 --> 00:19:07,920
John, you idiot. We've been
fucking robbed.
425
00:19:07,960 --> 00:19:10,000
John!
426
00:19:10,040 --> 00:19:11,840
Yeah, that's your time up.
427
00:19:11,880 --> 00:19:13,720
Why did you do that?
428
00:19:13,760 --> 00:19:15,720
John just went mad.
429
00:19:15,760 --> 00:19:17,680
No, no, no, no, no.
I dug that for ages.
430
00:19:17,720 --> 00:19:19,600
You threw all the sand out.
431
00:19:19,640 --> 00:19:21,280
There's so much fucking sand
in there.
432
00:19:21,320 --> 00:19:24,400
John, don't. Don't do more.
Please.
433
00:19:24,440 --> 00:19:26,800
You've just thrown all the sand out.
434
00:19:26,840 --> 00:19:30,120
I don't believe you threw out
all the sand. Oh...
435
00:19:34,440 --> 00:19:37,520
I don't, I don't know, I don't know.
436
00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:39,200
I don't know where to start.
437
00:19:39,240 --> 00:19:43,000
Fern had already called you "Dafty
in the middle",
438
00:19:43,040 --> 00:19:46,400
before the task sabotage even
started.
439
00:19:46,440 --> 00:19:47,640
LAUGHTER
440
00:19:47,680 --> 00:19:50,760
When he turned the hat upside down
and just started laughing...
441
00:19:50,800 --> 00:19:52,280
LAUGHTER
442
00:19:52,320 --> 00:19:54,400
..and you just both went, "What are
you doing?"
443
00:19:55,800 --> 00:19:57,320
I did so much work.
444
00:19:57,360 --> 00:19:59,120
I did most of the work in that task,
445
00:19:59,160 --> 00:20:03,320
and then, the whole time, Dara was
just barking orders from the back,
446
00:20:03,360 --> 00:20:07,520
while John just mischievously did
stuff in the middle... Yeah!
447
00:20:07,560 --> 00:20:09,560
..so I felt like I did the most
there.
448
00:20:09,600 --> 00:20:11,280
You were really industrious
449
00:20:11,320 --> 00:20:14,680
and I hope this pans out that you do
get some points and John doesn't.
450
00:20:14,720 --> 00:20:17,640
I admit that I'm a bit worried,
451
00:20:17,680 --> 00:20:21,720
because although, you know, I got
rid of the hat and that long tube,
452
00:20:21,760 --> 00:20:23,600
we both had one bucket of sand.
453
00:20:23,640 --> 00:20:25,400
Yeah, its close, it's very close.
454
00:20:25,440 --> 00:20:27,160
What do the scales say, baby?
455
00:20:27,200 --> 00:20:29,560
So, if the team of three win, John
loses.
456
00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:32,240
If the team of two wins, John wins.
Yep.
457
00:20:32,280 --> 00:20:36,480
The team of two got 21kg of sand.
21kg.
458
00:20:36,520 --> 00:20:38,040
How are you feeling?
459
00:20:38,080 --> 00:20:39,520
Hopeful.
460
00:20:39,560 --> 00:20:41,880
I'll wait till you've finished the
rest of the sentence.
461
00:20:41,920 --> 00:20:43,200
LAUGHTER
462
00:20:43,240 --> 00:20:46,600
So, the team of three put in 20...
463
00:20:46,640 --> 00:20:48,680
Oh!
464
00:20:48,720 --> 00:20:50,200
..point 9kg.
465
00:20:50,240 --> 00:20:51,920
THEY GROAN
466
00:20:53,640 --> 00:20:57,480
Some of it fell through the bottom
of the thing cos you...
467
00:20:57,520 --> 00:21:00,880
Did you scoop it off the...the slats
of the...of the trolley?
468
00:21:00,920 --> 00:21:03,560
The slats were very thin. There was
not a lot of sand on the slats.
469
00:21:03,600 --> 00:21:04,920
LAUGHTER
470
00:21:04,960 --> 00:21:07,000
So, there it is. So, what does that
do points-wise?
471
00:21:07,040 --> 00:21:09,720
Well, it means, unfortunately, Dara
and Fern don't get any points
472
00:21:09,760 --> 00:21:12,080
but all three - Sarah, Munya
and John get five points.
473
00:21:12,120 --> 00:21:13,280
There it is.
474
00:21:13,320 --> 00:21:14,480
APPLAUSE
475
00:21:17,280 --> 00:21:19,840
Sometimes, dirty deeds pay.
476
00:21:19,880 --> 00:21:22,040
Let's have a scoreboard, please,
Horne.
477
00:21:22,080 --> 00:21:23,800
OK, I've got the scoreboard right
here
478
00:21:23,840 --> 00:21:26,960
and John is having his best ever
episode by miles.
479
00:21:27,000 --> 00:21:28,600
He's in the lead with ten points.
480
00:21:28,640 --> 00:21:30,200
APPLAUSE
481
00:21:34,200 --> 00:21:36,760
Very good. Another task, please,
little dolly.
482
00:21:36,800 --> 00:21:40,240
Right you are. And let's all scream
for ice cream!
483
00:21:53,960 --> 00:21:55,520
Look what I made you.
484
00:21:55,560 --> 00:21:57,240
HE LAUGHS NERVOUSLY
485
00:21:57,280 --> 00:21:58,720
Ooh!
486
00:21:58,760 --> 00:22:00,000
LAUGHTER
487
00:22:00,040 --> 00:22:01,520
Ooh!
488
00:22:01,560 --> 00:22:05,200
Mm. Goddamn! What's been going on
in this room?
489
00:22:05,240 --> 00:22:07,440
Oh, ice cream.
490
00:22:07,480 --> 00:22:09,040
You like ice cream?
491
00:22:09,080 --> 00:22:10,720
I like some ice creams.
492
00:22:10,760 --> 00:22:12,920
Some of it looks gross.
493
00:22:14,360 --> 00:22:17,320
Identify the ice cream flavours.
494
00:22:17,360 --> 00:22:18,880
SHE LAUGHS NERVOUSLY
495
00:22:18,920 --> 00:22:22,400
The most correct ice cream flavours
identified wins.
496
00:22:22,440 --> 00:22:23,560
You have ten minutes.
497
00:22:23,600 --> 00:22:26,360
And you must find every flavour
delicious.
498
00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:27,760
Delicious?
499
00:22:27,800 --> 00:22:28,960
Delicious!
500
00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:30,800
That's...controlling.
501
00:22:30,840 --> 00:22:32,080
LAUGHTER
502
00:22:32,120 --> 00:22:33,880
Your time starts, now.
503
00:22:33,920 --> 00:22:36,000
Alex, I'm on a no-sugar diet.
504
00:22:36,040 --> 00:22:38,840
You lot have done me dirty cos
you've picked my one weakness.
505
00:22:38,880 --> 00:22:40,160
You want me to break my diet?
506
00:22:40,200 --> 00:22:42,520
Will it have an instant effect on
your body?
507
00:22:42,560 --> 00:22:43,800
Then, I'd love to see it.
508
00:22:43,840 --> 00:22:45,440
LAUGHTER
509
00:22:45,480 --> 00:22:48,040
It's very important to find each
flavour delicious. Mm.
510
00:22:48,080 --> 00:22:51,000
And there maybe more than one
flavour in all of them, in fact.
511
00:22:52,280 --> 00:22:53,640
What are you talking about?
512
00:22:53,680 --> 00:22:55,160
LAUGHTER
513
00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:57,840
Right, so, I've got ten minutes to
identify ice cream,
514
00:22:57,880 --> 00:22:59,280
not even tasting them.
515
00:23:02,280 --> 00:23:04,320
What is the sauce?
516
00:23:04,360 --> 00:23:06,040
What is it? Yes, what is it?
517
00:23:06,080 --> 00:23:07,720
APPLAUSE AND LAUGHTER
518
00:23:10,400 --> 00:23:12,640
I thought Fern sounded like she was
in a kebab shop
519
00:23:12,680 --> 00:23:14,560
at 3am in the morning. Oh, I know.
Play out?
520
00:23:14,600 --> 00:23:16,240
Yeah, I can play that sound. Here we
go.
521
00:23:16,280 --> 00:23:17,760
What is the sauce?
522
00:23:17,800 --> 00:23:19,360
What is it?
523
00:23:22,920 --> 00:23:26,920
I'm sorry to say I just have the
voice of a drunk person.
524
00:23:26,960 --> 00:23:28,360
LAUGHTER
525
00:23:28,400 --> 00:23:31,080
What's going on with this sugar
thing, then, Munya,
526
00:23:31,120 --> 00:23:33,080
before I start judging you?
527
00:23:33,120 --> 00:23:34,560
You see the thing is, yeah,
528
00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:38,080
the dentist told me I was 1mm away
from a root canal.
529
00:23:38,120 --> 00:23:40,840
Oh, my God, I'm going to penalise
you so heavily.
530
00:23:40,880 --> 00:23:42,240
No!
531
00:23:42,280 --> 00:23:45,040
Please, please! You want to see
some? Yeah!
532
00:23:45,080 --> 00:23:47,440
OK, we're going to start with three
of them first -
533
00:23:47,480 --> 00:23:50,720
Sarah, Munya and Fernya. Here we go.
534
00:23:50,760 --> 00:23:54,200
Mm... This one looks like it's going
to be poo-flavoured.
535
00:23:57,360 --> 00:23:58,800
You must find it delicious, please.
536
00:23:58,840 --> 00:24:00,520
Oh, that's very nice.
537
00:24:00,560 --> 00:24:02,000
LAUGHTER
538
00:24:04,640 --> 00:24:07,160
What the fuck is that?
539
00:24:09,280 --> 00:24:12,000
That's a bit salty, that is. Mm.
540
00:24:12,040 --> 00:24:13,400
Wait. So, I can eat this.
541
00:24:14,880 --> 00:24:17,920
I know what it is but I know what it
is.
542
00:24:17,960 --> 00:24:19,240
Dog biscuits.
543
00:24:20,800 --> 00:24:23,320
Argh, that's dog food, isn't it?
544
00:24:23,360 --> 00:24:24,640
That's dog food.
545
00:24:24,680 --> 00:24:26,480
Crisps, innit?
546
00:24:26,520 --> 00:24:28,200
Mm, delicious.
547
00:24:28,240 --> 00:24:30,200
That is fucking vile.
548
00:24:30,240 --> 00:24:31,520
Right, next one...
549
00:24:36,520 --> 00:24:38,360
Is it curry powder? OK.
550
00:24:38,400 --> 00:24:40,160
Tandoori ice cream.
551
00:24:40,200 --> 00:24:42,640
Coronation Chicken, innit?
552
00:24:42,680 --> 00:24:43,800
This one...
553
00:24:45,200 --> 00:24:46,600
Oh, wow!
554
00:24:48,680 --> 00:24:49,880
Wowzers.
555
00:24:51,960 --> 00:24:53,520
Oof!
556
00:24:55,320 --> 00:24:57,040
Just smells of nothing.
557
00:24:57,080 --> 00:24:58,640
Chilli and...
558
00:24:58,680 --> 00:25:00,560
..let's go mango.
559
00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:04,160
How about mash ice cream cos it's
got the consistency of mash?
560
00:25:04,200 --> 00:25:05,960
Some sort of Mexican flavour.
561
00:25:08,400 --> 00:25:09,920
I've been doing really well, so far.
562
00:25:12,640 --> 00:25:13,640
Mm.
563
00:25:13,680 --> 00:25:15,080
Cream flavour!
564
00:25:15,120 --> 00:25:17,040
Cream flavour ice cream?
565
00:25:17,080 --> 00:25:18,920
Uh-oh.
566
00:25:18,960 --> 00:25:20,720
Is there something else?
567
00:25:20,760 --> 00:25:22,440
Oh, is it breast milk?
568
00:25:22,480 --> 00:25:24,280
Coconut liquorice.
569
00:25:24,320 --> 00:25:25,840
That sounds nice.
570
00:25:25,880 --> 00:25:28,440
I think it's vanilla. I think it's a
curveball.
571
00:25:28,480 --> 00:25:31,760
White chocolate and breast milk. Mm!
572
00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:33,520
Cos that is a thing.
573
00:25:33,560 --> 00:25:36,520
I don't do olives. Tiny, shitty
grapes.
574
00:25:36,560 --> 00:25:38,920
You've only got one and a half
minutes. Oh, go to hell.
575
00:25:38,960 --> 00:25:40,880
I'm just going to have the green
stuff.
576
00:25:42,520 --> 00:25:44,440
You must find each flavour
delicious.
577
00:25:45,720 --> 00:25:46,920
LAUGHTER
578
00:25:46,960 --> 00:25:49,840
Olive green smoothie. That's
my...that's my answer.
579
00:25:49,880 --> 00:25:53,320
Oh, I've been excited about this
one. The last one.
580
00:25:53,360 --> 00:25:55,840
I've never said, "That's vile",
before and gone in for more.
581
00:25:55,880 --> 00:25:57,880
Also, you have to say it's
delicious.
582
00:25:57,920 --> 00:25:59,840
Oh, sorry! That's northern for
delicious.
583
00:25:59,880 --> 00:26:01,720
Petrol or something.
584
00:26:01,760 --> 00:26:04,320
Maybe something cheesy? OK.
585
00:26:04,360 --> 00:26:07,360
Fucking salt and petrol or
something.
586
00:26:07,400 --> 00:26:09,280
Urgh. Please, find it delicious.
587
00:26:09,320 --> 00:26:11,520
Urgh!
588
00:26:15,960 --> 00:26:17,320
It's so horrible!
589
00:26:17,360 --> 00:26:18,400
WHISTLE BLOWS
590
00:26:18,440 --> 00:26:19,640
You can stop now.
591
00:26:19,680 --> 00:26:20,880
Urgh!
592
00:26:20,920 --> 00:26:22,320
APPLAUSE
593
00:26:24,160 --> 00:26:25,440
I mean, on reflection,
594
00:26:25,480 --> 00:26:28,920
you sounded like you were in a kebab
house throughout.
595
00:26:28,960 --> 00:26:31,080
This whole thing, I don't know how
to...
596
00:26:31,120 --> 00:26:32,680
Whether I'm going to penalise people
597
00:26:32,720 --> 00:26:35,480
because you were supposed to make
out it was delicious throughout.
598
00:26:35,520 --> 00:26:39,000
Sarah, the very first thing you said
after tasted one is, and I quote,
599
00:26:39,040 --> 00:26:40,440
"What the fuck is that?"
600
00:26:40,480 --> 00:26:41,640
LAUGHTER
601
00:26:41,680 --> 00:26:44,760
Like, "Ooh, what the fuck is that?
Mm."
602
00:26:44,800 --> 00:26:46,400
LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
603
00:26:48,840 --> 00:26:52,240
Munya, you appeared to be trying to
smell flavours
604
00:26:52,280 --> 00:26:55,520
to avoid a solitary filling.
605
00:26:55,560 --> 00:26:58,800
I think it's more of an achievement
to have snorted ice cream
606
00:26:58,840 --> 00:27:00,520
cos I got that one right, didn't I?
607
00:27:00,560 --> 00:27:02,960
There were ten flavours, there. You
got one of the ten.
608
00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:05,600
Shall I tell you what the actual
flavours were? Please.
609
00:27:05,640 --> 00:27:09,000
The dog food one, they thought was
dog food was marmite and porridge.
610
00:27:09,040 --> 00:27:10,640
Then, we had curry and naan bread.
611
00:27:10,680 --> 00:27:12,480
We've accepted most of their curry
answers.
612
00:27:12,520 --> 00:27:15,120
Cornflakes and chilli. Most of them
got chilli.
613
00:27:15,160 --> 00:27:17,800
Then, we had white chocolate and
macaroni cheese,
614
00:27:17,840 --> 00:27:20,480
and then, the petrol one was
bechamel sauce
615
00:27:20,520 --> 00:27:21,960
and Brussels sprout puree.
616
00:27:22,000 --> 00:27:24,000
Bechamel, beautiful, beautiful.
617
00:27:24,040 --> 00:27:26,760
So, out of them, Munya only got one
flavour,
618
00:27:26,800 --> 00:27:29,160
Sarah - two, Fern - three of the
flavours.
619
00:27:29,200 --> 00:27:32,400
Does something cheesy not count as
macaroni cheese?
620
00:27:32,440 --> 00:27:33,640
No.
621
00:27:33,680 --> 00:27:35,200
LAUGHTER
622
00:27:35,240 --> 00:27:36,720
All right, it's the end of Part Two.
623
00:27:36,760 --> 00:27:39,160
Now, tell him to get his hands out
of his pyjama bottoms
624
00:27:39,200 --> 00:27:40,880
and go and make you a cup of tea.
625
00:27:40,920 --> 00:27:42,120
APPLAUSE
626
00:27:50,680 --> 00:27:51,920
APPLAUSE
627
00:27:51,960 --> 00:27:53,400
Oh, hello!
628
00:27:53,440 --> 00:27:56,680
Welcome back to Part Three of
Taskmaster. Where were we, Alex?
629
00:27:56,720 --> 00:27:59,120
Oh, I'm so sorry, I appear to have
gone all coy.
630
00:27:59,160 --> 00:28:02,440
I'm back! Ice cream flavour
identification,
631
00:28:02,480 --> 00:28:05,840
that's where we were, and now, for
the final two, it's John and Dara.
632
00:28:07,520 --> 00:28:09,040
This is going to be rancid.
633
00:28:11,840 --> 00:28:13,840
Oh, it's very nice.
634
00:28:16,480 --> 00:28:17,760
Delicious.
635
00:28:17,800 --> 00:28:20,040
I mean, that's like white chocolate.
636
00:28:20,080 --> 00:28:22,200
Is it white chocolate?
637
00:28:22,240 --> 00:28:24,720
OK, white chocolate... There's bits
in that, there's bits.
638
00:28:24,760 --> 00:28:26,880
Right, tell me about the bits.
639
00:28:26,920 --> 00:28:28,600
Marshmallow.
640
00:28:31,880 --> 00:28:34,120
Oh, a delicious kick off that.
641
00:28:34,160 --> 00:28:36,360
LAUGHTER
642
00:28:37,920 --> 00:28:40,640
Oh, Jesus Christ!
643
00:28:40,680 --> 00:28:44,200
Would you like a glass of water?
Oh, yeah.
644
00:28:44,240 --> 00:28:46,840
Delicious water coming up. Mm!
645
00:28:46,880 --> 00:28:48,360
Sweet Jesus.
646
00:28:53,640 --> 00:28:55,160
Oh!
647
00:28:55,200 --> 00:28:56,960
HE LAUGHS
648
00:28:57,000 --> 00:28:59,600
Chilli. Sounds nice.
649
00:28:59,640 --> 00:29:02,680
It's not just nice, it's delicious.
650
00:29:02,720 --> 00:29:04,480
This thing's driving me crazy.
651
00:29:08,360 --> 00:29:10,360
LAUGHTER
652
00:29:10,400 --> 00:29:12,280
Wasabi maybe?
653
00:29:12,320 --> 00:29:14,400
Wasabi.
654
00:29:14,440 --> 00:29:15,600
Wasabi?
655
00:29:17,280 --> 00:29:19,880
It's curry.
656
00:29:19,920 --> 00:29:21,680
Tikka Masala.
657
00:29:27,960 --> 00:29:30,040
OK, we're in the last 45 seconds.
658
00:29:30,080 --> 00:29:31,760
WHISPERS: It's delicious.
659
00:29:31,800 --> 00:29:33,200
LAUGHTER
660
00:29:33,240 --> 00:29:35,160
There might be more than one
flavour in...
661
00:29:35,200 --> 00:29:37,320
Yeah, no, I think you've really
gone to town here. Mm.
662
00:29:37,360 --> 00:29:38,760
Yeah, it's Marmite.
663
00:29:38,800 --> 00:29:40,160
Marmite. OK.
664
00:29:40,200 --> 00:29:41,400
WHISTLE BLOWS
665
00:29:41,440 --> 00:29:44,040
Delicious. Oh, it was delicious.
What a treat!
666
00:29:49,720 --> 00:29:51,480
Well, I must commend both gentlemen
667
00:29:51,520 --> 00:29:54,000
for making an effort with the
deliciousness. Thank you.
668
00:29:54,040 --> 00:29:57,240
The first contestants so far to
pretend they liked it.
669
00:29:57,280 --> 00:30:01,000
I particularly enjoyed Dara's,
"There's a delicious kick off that."
670
00:30:01,040 --> 00:30:03,120
LAUGHTER
671
00:30:03,160 --> 00:30:06,200
And you both did some great
face-acting as well.
672
00:30:06,240 --> 00:30:08,800
That was not acting. That was a
genuine human response
673
00:30:08,840 --> 00:30:12,120
to my body wanting to expel what I
just put into it.
674
00:30:12,160 --> 00:30:13,520
LAUGHTER
675
00:30:13,560 --> 00:30:15,040
They seemed pretty good, though.
676
00:30:15,080 --> 00:30:17,600
Well, they both got the Marmite,
which was very pleasing.
677
00:30:17,640 --> 00:30:19,360
They both got curry and white
chocolate.
678
00:30:19,400 --> 00:30:21,520
But Dara got one extra cos he got
the chilli as well.
679
00:30:21,560 --> 00:30:24,440
So, it means that Munya only gets
the one point, then.
680
00:30:24,480 --> 00:30:25,760
Sarah gets two points,
681
00:30:25,800 --> 00:30:28,520
John and Fern come joint second,
having guessed three flavours,
682
00:30:28,560 --> 00:30:30,040
so they get four points each.
683
00:30:30,080 --> 00:30:33,240
But the winner of this task is
Dara O Briain. He gets five points.
684
00:30:33,280 --> 00:30:34,520
APPLAUSE
685
00:30:35,800 --> 00:30:37,120
Next task, please.
686
00:30:37,160 --> 00:30:39,440
OK. Ready? Catch!
687
00:30:54,960 --> 00:30:56,920
What up, my slime?
688
00:30:56,960 --> 00:30:58,880
Ah! What up?
689
00:30:58,920 --> 00:31:00,720
Hello. Oh, hello, Fern.
690
00:31:05,480 --> 00:31:06,800
Catch something.
691
00:31:06,840 --> 00:31:08,240
Catch something.
692
00:31:08,280 --> 00:31:10,080
The most spectacular catch wins.
693
00:31:10,120 --> 00:31:11,560
You have 20 minutes.
694
00:31:11,600 --> 00:31:13,240
Time starts, now.
695
00:31:13,280 --> 00:31:15,440
Has anybody got Covid, no? No, I
don't have Covid.
696
00:31:15,480 --> 00:31:18,560
Have you got any sort of infectious
diseases?
697
00:31:18,600 --> 00:31:20,760
I had appendicitis, when I was
eight.
698
00:31:20,800 --> 00:31:21,840
Oh.
699
00:31:21,880 --> 00:31:24,400
I remember catching something, when
I was a kid.
700
00:31:24,440 --> 00:31:27,000
My dad kicked an American football
in the air.
701
00:31:27,040 --> 00:31:29,600
I really remember...
702
00:31:29,640 --> 00:31:31,200
..catching it.
703
00:31:31,240 --> 00:31:32,440
Are you good at catching?
704
00:31:32,480 --> 00:31:34,720
Yeah, if I can see the thing coming.
705
00:31:34,760 --> 00:31:37,200
But how much better and more
spectacular would it be,
706
00:31:37,240 --> 00:31:38,520
if I couldn't see it coming?
707
00:31:38,560 --> 00:31:41,360
Oh, my God! So, my first thought is
just illnesses
708
00:31:41,400 --> 00:31:44,080
but I just don't think any of us
have got time.
709
00:31:44,120 --> 00:31:46,400
So, first things first, I need a
ball.
710
00:31:46,440 --> 00:31:48,360
I'm just going to find a ball, Alex,
OK? OK.
711
00:31:48,400 --> 00:31:50,520
You stay right there, my slime.
712
00:31:50,560 --> 00:31:51,840
What do you catch?
713
00:31:51,880 --> 00:31:53,440
You catch a fish.
714
00:31:53,480 --> 00:31:56,000
But everyone's going to say catch a
fish.
715
00:31:56,040 --> 00:31:59,200
What could I catch? Nothing's alive
in here.
716
00:31:59,240 --> 00:32:02,240
You don't want to go outside and
just catch things?
717
00:32:02,280 --> 00:32:04,720
What would I catch outside, the
birds?
718
00:32:04,760 --> 00:32:07,400
Uh, I wouldn't worry about animals.
719
00:32:07,440 --> 00:32:08,680
People?
720
00:32:09,760 --> 00:32:11,040
Kidnap?
721
00:32:11,080 --> 00:32:12,400
LAUGHTER
722
00:32:12,440 --> 00:32:15,000
Also, whenever there's one of these,
you have to do it.
723
00:32:15,040 --> 00:32:16,120
HORN TOOTS
724
00:32:16,160 --> 00:32:17,160
SHE MIMICS THE HORN
725
00:32:17,200 --> 00:32:18,880
Mine's better. Mine's always better.
726
00:32:18,920 --> 00:32:20,320
It's shit.
727
00:32:20,360 --> 00:32:21,720
LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
728
00:32:24,240 --> 00:32:27,600
So, your first three instincts of
what you could catch, Fern,
729
00:32:27,640 --> 00:32:30,760
are a fish, a bird, people.
730
00:32:30,800 --> 00:32:32,680
Yes.
731
00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:35,440
I thought that was all obvious
things to say.
732
00:32:35,480 --> 00:32:37,880
John, do you want to tell us more
about the moving story
733
00:32:37,920 --> 00:32:39,560
from your youth, before we crack on?
734
00:32:39,600 --> 00:32:41,000
LAUGHTER
735
00:32:41,040 --> 00:32:43,840
Honestly, it's...it's a vivid
childhood memory
736
00:32:43,880 --> 00:32:47,200
that I caught it and I kept on
running.
737
00:32:47,240 --> 00:32:48,720
LAUGHTER
738
00:32:48,760 --> 00:32:51,680
And you've not...you've not seen any
of your family since.
739
00:32:54,960 --> 00:32:56,560
Let's see some spectacular catches.
740
00:32:56,600 --> 00:32:59,720
Fine. Yes, it's a simple task - most
spectacular catch wins.
741
00:32:59,760 --> 00:33:03,360
We're going to start with Mun and
Jun. Here we go.
742
00:33:03,400 --> 00:33:04,920
Alex...
743
00:33:04,960 --> 00:33:06,400
..how good are you at throwing?
744
00:33:06,440 --> 00:33:07,800
Pretty good.
745
00:33:07,840 --> 00:33:10,960
Well, I was thinking of maybe
punting it over the house,
746
00:33:11,000 --> 00:33:14,360
and then, running around and
catching it.
747
00:33:14,400 --> 00:33:16,440
I'm going to sit on Greg's shoulders
748
00:33:16,480 --> 00:33:19,080
and you're going to go all the way
to the other side of the house
749
00:33:19,120 --> 00:33:21,680
and throw the ball into my bucket,
yeah?
750
00:33:21,720 --> 00:33:22,920
Yes.
751
00:33:24,720 --> 00:33:26,960
Right then...
752
00:33:27,000 --> 00:33:28,320
Throw it!
753
00:33:30,880 --> 00:33:32,560
Oh, no.
754
00:33:32,600 --> 00:33:34,360
Alex, more power!
755
00:33:34,400 --> 00:33:36,000
More power.
756
00:33:41,320 --> 00:33:43,080
Right, I've just got to go high.
757
00:33:43,120 --> 00:33:44,360
Oh, dear.
758
00:33:44,400 --> 00:33:46,080
No, Alex. Come on!
759
00:33:46,120 --> 00:33:47,480
ALEX GROANS
760
00:33:47,520 --> 00:33:49,560
No, and again!
761
00:33:51,680 --> 00:33:53,640
More power! Oh, fuck!
762
00:33:53,680 --> 00:33:55,200
Don't swear at me, Alex.
763
00:33:56,640 --> 00:33:58,920
HE GROANS
764
00:33:58,960 --> 00:34:00,640
Go on, go on!
765
00:34:02,640 --> 00:34:04,560
Oh, fuck!
766
00:34:04,600 --> 00:34:07,160
The problem is I'm not around here,
when it lands.
767
00:34:07,200 --> 00:34:08,640
LAUGHTER
768
00:34:08,680 --> 00:34:10,240
No! My arm hurts.
769
00:34:10,280 --> 00:34:12,560
Everyone watching this right now
thinks we can't do it.
770
00:34:12,600 --> 00:34:13,800
I don't think we can do it.
771
00:34:13,840 --> 00:34:16,080
But that's what's going to make it
impressive, right?
772
00:34:16,120 --> 00:34:18,760
Let me see that fire. Go on, let's
say, "Argh!" Argh.
773
00:34:18,800 --> 00:34:21,280
No, listen to me, again, you're half
holding back.
774
00:34:21,320 --> 00:34:23,800
I want you to just go argh! I'm
cold. My shoulder hurts.
775
00:34:23,840 --> 00:34:25,240
Argh.
776
00:34:25,280 --> 00:34:26,760
Argh!
777
00:34:26,800 --> 00:34:29,200
Yes, nearly, Alex. One more!
778
00:34:31,520 --> 00:34:34,880
Oh, that's the way to go, though.
779
00:34:34,920 --> 00:34:36,440
Yeah! Oh, Alex, we nearly had it!
780
00:34:36,480 --> 00:34:37,880
AUDIENCE GROANS
781
00:34:37,920 --> 00:34:39,280
One more, one more!
782
00:34:39,320 --> 00:34:40,720
ALEX GROANS
783
00:34:42,200 --> 00:34:44,320
Yeah! Oh, no!
784
00:34:44,360 --> 00:34:46,720
WHISPERS: Oh, shit.
785
00:34:46,760 --> 00:34:48,360
Go on.
786
00:34:53,920 --> 00:34:55,920
Well, something's happened.
787
00:34:55,960 --> 00:34:57,320
Something's fucking happened!
788
00:34:57,360 --> 00:34:59,440
APPLAUSE
789
00:34:59,480 --> 00:35:01,880
I caught one. I'll take that.
790
00:35:01,920 --> 00:35:03,400
This is my last ball.
791
00:35:03,440 --> 00:35:04,960
Are you ready?
792
00:35:05,000 --> 00:35:07,080
Yeah! OK, here we go, Munya.
793
00:35:08,240 --> 00:35:09,400
WHISPERS: Come on.
794
00:35:21,200 --> 00:35:23,240
Argh!
795
00:35:23,280 --> 00:35:25,920
Did you catch it? Nooo!
796
00:35:25,960 --> 00:35:27,840
APPLAUSE
797
00:35:32,440 --> 00:35:36,160
What was it you said, when Munya
quite reasonably asked you
798
00:35:36,200 --> 00:35:38,120
to put more power into your throw?
799
00:35:38,160 --> 00:35:39,640
I don't know, what did I say?
800
00:35:39,680 --> 00:35:41,160
I'll tell you what you said. Right.
801
00:35:41,200 --> 00:35:43,480
You whispered to yourself, "Fuck
sake."
802
00:35:43,520 --> 00:35:44,960
LAUGHTER
803
00:35:49,880 --> 00:35:52,800
13 series and that's the first time
you've ever sworn. First time, yeah.
804
00:35:52,840 --> 00:35:55,080
Well, how do you think that made
Munya...
805
00:35:55,120 --> 00:35:56,680
Look at Munya's face, now. Yeah.
806
00:35:56,720 --> 00:35:58,520
He's only 21 or something.
807
00:35:58,560 --> 00:36:01,280
First time...first time I've ever
sworn.
808
00:36:01,320 --> 00:36:03,160
John, this is what I wrote down -
809
00:36:03,200 --> 00:36:05,920
"When I was at primary school there
was a boy called Morgan,
810
00:36:05,960 --> 00:36:07,280
"who got sent home one day
811
00:36:07,320 --> 00:36:09,680
"because he tried to eat the hood
off his own coat."
812
00:36:09,720 --> 00:36:11,360
LAUGHTER
813
00:36:15,920 --> 00:36:19,160
Throughout that task, you reminded
me of Morgan.
814
00:36:21,920 --> 00:36:25,680
OK, next up, like all of us, she's
scared of fires.
815
00:36:25,720 --> 00:36:27,400
Yes, it's Bern Afrady.
816
00:36:57,480 --> 00:36:59,120
Oh, lovely.
817
00:36:59,160 --> 00:37:01,040
20 minutes, 20 minutes.
818
00:37:01,080 --> 00:37:03,400
I caught a falling star.
819
00:37:03,440 --> 00:37:07,680
I know. Powered only by turquoise
fart.
820
00:37:07,720 --> 00:37:09,200
LAUGHTER
821
00:37:09,240 --> 00:37:10,400
Yes.
822
00:37:10,440 --> 00:37:13,080
Greg, I thought I'd show a little
making of video,
823
00:37:13,120 --> 00:37:16,360
so we can all admire the effort that
Fern put into hers.
824
00:37:21,840 --> 00:37:23,400
FERN GROANS
825
00:37:30,040 --> 00:37:31,280
OK, let's have a break.
826
00:37:31,320 --> 00:37:34,000
When we return, the high-octane
action continues
827
00:37:34,040 --> 00:37:36,680
and someone wins a dry skin foot
scraper.
828
00:37:36,720 --> 00:37:38,040
HE GASPS
829
00:37:38,080 --> 00:37:39,320
APPLAUSE
830
00:37:49,520 --> 00:37:51,160
APPLAUSE
831
00:37:51,200 --> 00:37:54,480
Oh, no! Oh, yes! It's the final part
of the show
832
00:37:54,520 --> 00:37:56,880
and the current task involves
catching.
833
00:37:56,920 --> 00:37:58,120
Recap, Alex.
834
00:37:58,160 --> 00:38:00,320
It's a simple task - most
spectacular catch wins.
835
00:38:00,360 --> 00:38:03,000
We've had some classic catching and
some CGI catching, so far.
836
00:38:03,040 --> 00:38:05,000
Next up, it's not the mayor of
silicon.
837
00:38:05,040 --> 00:38:06,760
No, It's Sarah Millican.
838
00:38:39,520 --> 00:38:41,080
APPLAUSE
839
00:38:41,120 --> 00:38:43,440
Pretty clever.
840
00:38:43,480 --> 00:38:45,800
She caught fire. Enchanting.
841
00:38:45,840 --> 00:38:47,520
I...I got it. Yeah, sorry.
842
00:38:49,360 --> 00:38:50,760
I particularly liked the...
843
00:38:50,800 --> 00:38:51,960
HE BLOWS
844
00:38:52,000 --> 00:38:56,000
Yeah. ..the romance of that with
this twat in the background.
845
00:38:56,040 --> 00:38:58,720
Yeah, I wasn't sure he was going to
be in the actual edit.
846
00:38:58,760 --> 00:39:00,160
Oh, really?
847
00:39:00,200 --> 00:39:03,280
I thought it was supposed to look
like I was blowing it out.
848
00:39:03,320 --> 00:39:05,920
It did sort of mess with the romance
of it a little bit, didn't it?
849
00:39:05,960 --> 00:39:08,520
I really enjoyed... I'd never used a
fire extinguisher before.
850
00:39:08,560 --> 00:39:09,800
I now use them all the time.
851
00:39:09,840 --> 00:39:11,760
Last one? Last one, yes.
852
00:39:11,800 --> 00:39:16,240
Finally, it's the date of birth
himself, DOB, Dara O Briain.
853
00:39:16,280 --> 00:39:17,960
Oh!
854
00:39:20,760 --> 00:39:23,600
Wait there, little one. You wait
there.
855
00:39:23,640 --> 00:39:25,320
I will close the door.
856
00:39:30,800 --> 00:39:33,040
Oh, my baby!
857
00:39:33,080 --> 00:39:34,480
No!
858
00:39:39,120 --> 00:39:41,320
What is happening to my baby?!
859
00:39:41,360 --> 00:39:43,520
Who will save my baby?!
860
00:39:47,520 --> 00:39:50,920
Nooo!
861
00:39:55,680 --> 00:39:57,400
Will somebody catch my baby?!
862
00:40:01,280 --> 00:40:02,560
Ooh!
863
00:40:02,600 --> 00:40:04,880
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
864
00:40:08,800 --> 00:40:11,800
Dara, it was a hauntingly beautiful
tale.
865
00:40:11,840 --> 00:40:13,760
All that we need to do is to give
the film a title
866
00:40:13,800 --> 00:40:15,840
and then we can move on
and give some points out.
867
00:40:15,880 --> 00:40:18,080
Well, obviously Ooh, My Baby.
868
00:40:19,880 --> 00:40:22,840
Ooh, My Baby it is. Right.
Here come some points.
869
00:40:22,880 --> 00:40:26,400
Yes. Do you wanna do the
least-spectacular catch first? Yeah,
course, and I feel sorry for him
870
00:40:26,440 --> 00:40:27,960
because he really did try,
871
00:40:28,000 --> 00:40:30,120
but someone didn't put enough power
872
00:40:30,160 --> 00:40:32,280
into their fucking throws,
did they?
873
00:40:32,320 --> 00:40:33,880
Fuck's sake. So...
874
00:40:35,440 --> 00:40:37,560
It's not right
hearing him swear, is it?
875
00:40:37,600 --> 00:40:39,920
No. Feels wrong.
He didn't actually do any catches.
876
00:40:39,960 --> 00:40:42,120
No, but give the boy a point,
for God's sake.
877
00:40:42,160 --> 00:40:44,800
Please. OK, so one point to
Munya Chawawa. Yes. OK.
878
00:40:44,840 --> 00:40:47,320
Amazingly, getting two points just
because there was
879
00:40:47,360 --> 00:40:50,920
a catch involved,
John gets two points.
880
00:40:50,960 --> 00:40:52,880
Well done, John. Three points -
881
00:40:52,920 --> 00:40:54,840
and I blame you for this as well,
882
00:40:54,880 --> 00:40:58,000
because if you'd been
airbrush CGI'd out of it
883
00:40:58,040 --> 00:41:00,240
and I could have just seen
her hauntingly blowing
884
00:41:00,280 --> 00:41:02,360
the flames out, then she might
have been up higher.
885
00:41:02,400 --> 00:41:03,760
So three points - your fault.
886
00:41:03,800 --> 00:41:05,760
Yep, good, good, good.
Three to Sarah.
887
00:41:05,800 --> 00:41:07,920
Four points for the disturbing
888
00:41:07,960 --> 00:41:09,480
and yet comforting film
889
00:41:09,520 --> 00:41:10,960
of a woman who plucked
890
00:41:11,000 --> 00:41:12,960
a star from the sky... Lovely.
891
00:41:13,000 --> 00:41:16,200
..under the power of her own
flatulence go to Fern,
892
00:41:16,240 --> 00:41:19,960
and finally... how could Ooh,
My Baby get
893
00:41:20,000 --> 00:41:23,120
anything than a deserved
five points?
894
00:41:23,160 --> 00:41:25,840
Five points to Dara O Briain.
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
895
00:41:28,280 --> 00:41:30,000
Please stay where you are while Alex
896
00:41:30,040 --> 00:41:32,720
and I head to the stage...
AUDIENCE: Ooooh!
897
00:41:32,760 --> 00:41:34,880
..for the final task of the show.
898
00:41:43,400 --> 00:41:46,120
Hello. Who will read the task?
899
00:41:46,160 --> 00:41:49,000
John Kearns, the leader.
900
00:41:49,040 --> 00:41:50,480
And a liar.
901
00:41:53,360 --> 00:41:58,280
"Predict whether an item will create
a higher or lower number of decibels
902
00:41:58,320 --> 00:42:01,000
"than the previous item.
903
00:42:01,040 --> 00:42:04,440
"If you are wrong, you are out.
904
00:42:04,480 --> 00:42:07,800
"Last player standing wins."
905
00:42:07,840 --> 00:42:09,400
Yes, so, very simply,
906
00:42:09,440 --> 00:42:11,360
Greg is gonna make a noise.
907
00:42:11,400 --> 00:42:14,720
I am. He's then gonna tell you what
he's gonna do with the next one,
908
00:42:14,760 --> 00:42:17,760
and you have to predict whether that
noise is gonna be louder or quieter
909
00:42:17,800 --> 00:42:19,360
than the previous noise.
910
00:42:19,400 --> 00:42:21,800
You have paddles there
with "higher" or "lower" on.
911
00:42:21,840 --> 00:42:24,400
If you're wrong, you're out, unless
all of you are wrong, and then
912
00:42:24,440 --> 00:42:26,880
we'll move onto the next one.
But once you're out, you're out.
913
00:42:26,920 --> 00:42:29,240
It's a rip-off of
Play Your Cards Right.
914
00:42:30,600 --> 00:42:33,560
So were going to start off with
the opening noise.
915
00:42:33,600 --> 00:42:35,200
A simple horn.
916
00:42:35,240 --> 00:42:37,080
Sarah, would you like
to do yours before I commence?
917
00:42:37,120 --> 00:42:39,160
IMITATES HORN PARPING
Thank you.
918
00:42:39,200 --> 00:42:41,440
And now the horn proper.
919
00:42:46,720 --> 00:42:51,280
And that is 107 decibels. 107.
920
00:42:51,320 --> 00:42:53,440
And now were in gameplay.
921
00:42:53,480 --> 00:42:55,080
CHUCKLING
922
00:42:55,120 --> 00:42:58,880
This noise is going to be
a packet of cereal landing on a bar.
923
00:43:00,120 --> 00:43:03,920
Will that be higher or lower
than 107 decibels?
924
00:43:03,960 --> 00:43:05,080
Have a think.
925
00:43:05,120 --> 00:43:08,000
Please reveal your guesses now.
926
00:43:09,840 --> 00:43:11,440
OK, we have three highers,
two lowers.
927
00:43:11,480 --> 00:43:14,080
We're going to lose some people
here. Some people are going out.
928
00:43:14,120 --> 00:43:17,240
John and Sarah think lower,
the rest think higher.
929
00:43:17,280 --> 00:43:18,760
Are you ready, Greg?
930
00:43:20,200 --> 00:43:22,920
MURMURING
That's got to be louder.
931
00:43:22,960 --> 00:43:25,880
Real problems cos I didn't press
the right button on the...
932
00:43:28,800 --> 00:43:31,160
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
933
00:43:34,640 --> 00:43:37,040
This is to beat 107 decibels.
934
00:43:37,080 --> 00:43:38,840
Tell me to release the cereal.
935
00:43:38,880 --> 00:43:40,240
Release the cereal.
936
00:43:42,080 --> 00:43:45,400
It's 101.9 decibels.
937
00:43:45,440 --> 00:43:46,640
GASPING
938
00:43:46,680 --> 00:43:48,560
It's already down to two people.
939
00:43:50,080 --> 00:43:53,200
The lowers are John Kearns
and Sarah Millican.
940
00:43:53,240 --> 00:43:57,240
This time Greg is going
to attack the marbles with
941
00:43:57,280 --> 00:43:58,800
an electric toothbrush?
942
00:43:58,840 --> 00:44:01,560
It's an electric toothbrush,
and I'll be thrusting it
943
00:44:01,600 --> 00:44:04,320
in and out of marbles
in a regulation manner.
944
00:44:07,400 --> 00:44:10,160
OK, so do you think that's gonna be
higher or lower than
945
00:44:10,200 --> 00:44:11,960
the release of cereal onto a bar?
946
00:44:12,000 --> 00:44:14,880
Are you gonna be jabbing
or are you gonna be rolling?
947
00:44:14,920 --> 00:44:16,360
I'm sorry, John, I did say
948
00:44:16,400 --> 00:44:18,920
I'd be thrusting it
in and out of the marbles
949
00:44:18,960 --> 00:44:20,520
in a regulation manner.
950
00:44:24,360 --> 00:44:26,640
So will it be higher or lower
than 101.9?
951
00:44:26,680 --> 00:44:29,080
Please release your paddles now.
952
00:44:30,400 --> 00:44:32,760
Ooh, this is going to be the end of
the task!
953
00:44:32,800 --> 00:44:34,240
Oh, we're going to get ourselves...
954
00:44:35,440 --> 00:44:39,000
We've got a higher and lower, and if
this is lower than 101.9,
955
00:44:39,040 --> 00:44:41,840
then Sarah Millican wins. If it's
higher than 101.9,
956
00:44:41,880 --> 00:44:44,280
John Kearns, the unlikely candidate,
wins.
957
00:44:44,320 --> 00:44:46,600
Let's dance.
958
00:44:46,640 --> 00:44:49,320
BUZZING
The brush is on.
959
00:44:49,360 --> 00:44:50,920
Let the thrust commence.
960
00:45:01,400 --> 00:45:03,760
You did what you said you were
gonna do.
961
00:45:03,800 --> 00:45:05,320
And that was
962
00:45:05,360 --> 00:45:09,000
90.7 decibels, which means the
winner - already -
963
00:45:09,040 --> 00:45:10,840
is Sarah Millican.
964
00:45:10,880 --> 00:45:12,840
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
There it is.
965
00:45:15,360 --> 00:45:18,840
Let's go back down and see how
that's affected the final scores.
966
00:45:25,520 --> 00:45:29,000
The points for that one, we have
three people in joint third.
967
00:45:29,040 --> 00:45:32,920
That was, of course,
Dara, Munya and Fern.
968
00:45:32,960 --> 00:45:35,120
They all get three points each.
969
00:45:35,160 --> 00:45:37,520
Four points for second place
was John,
970
00:45:37,560 --> 00:45:40,000
just behind Sarah Millican,
who gets five points.
971
00:45:42,840 --> 00:45:47,040
So... It's John Kearns in the lead,
with 20 points! Well done, John.
972
00:45:47,080 --> 00:45:49,560
CHEERING
973
00:45:49,600 --> 00:45:54,040
Wow! What?! John Kearns wins!
974
00:45:54,080 --> 00:45:59,000
Please go and surround yourself
with your Sunday funday prizes.
975
00:46:01,920 --> 00:46:04,600
So, what have we learnt today?
976
00:46:04,640 --> 00:46:07,280
We've learnt that if you find
yourself on a night out
977
00:46:07,320 --> 00:46:10,040
with your friends, and you've had
a little too much to drink
978
00:46:10,080 --> 00:46:13,280
and you're feeling peckish, before
you pop that late-night snack
979
00:46:13,320 --> 00:46:16,560
into your mouth, don't forget
to ask yourself...
980
00:46:16,600 --> 00:46:19,600
FERN: What is the sauce?!
What IS that?!
981
00:46:21,560 --> 00:46:23,720
This episode is over but I want you
to all go to bed
982
00:46:23,760 --> 00:46:25,360
thinking about tonight's winner.
983
00:46:25,400 --> 00:46:29,160
Unbelievably, it is John Kearns!
984
00:46:29,200 --> 00:46:31,840
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
985
00:46:51,480 --> 00:46:53,080
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