All language subtitles for 04-Vi

And that's that.

Coffee, Joyce?

Love it, thanks.

Hello, can I help you? I'm here to see
Dr. Tracy.

Do you have an appointment?

Yeah, two.

My name is Paul Garvin.

Okay, the doctor will be right back.
Have a seat, please.

Thank you.

Hello, Paul.

How are you, Julie? Great.

How about some coffee?

No, thanks.

How's the film coming along?

Oh, just fine.

Good. The doctor will be back in a few
minutes.

You can wait in his office if you like.

Oh, thanks.

Lucky you. Not bad.

You think so?

So do you. I'm not blind, honey.

I don't know what to do, Joyce.

I know I shouldn't, but I've been dating
Paul.

I really like him.

Whatever you do, don't let the doctor
find out.

Your two o 'clock appointment is waiting
in your office, doctor.

Am I late?

He was early.

Thank you.

Any messages, Joyce?

Not you, doctor.

Hello, Paul.

Well.

Here we are.

How's work coming along?

Okay.

In fact, I just started a new picture.

Well, that's progress.

Come on, Paul. What is it?

Spit it out.

Is it the nightmares again?

The mannequin?

Yes. Tell me about it.

Look, Paul, I'm your doctor, not your
confessor.

The second you walk through that door, I
want you to drop your guilt like it's a

load of garbage.

There's nothing you can't tell me.
Believe me, I've probably heard it

Well, why can't I stop myself?

Just when I think it's getting better,
it starts in again.

What's wrong with me? All of us, and I
mean all of us, have deep, dark secrets

we lock up.

But they won't stay locked up.

They escape in unusual disguises.

And it's our business, yours and mine,
to find them out, to find the keys that

unlock these terrible secrets.

They're there, but we've got to find
them.

Okay?

Okay.

Now, let's get back to that party, the
masquerade.

You say that was the first time you ever
dressed completely as a woman.

Yes.

How did you feel?

I enjoyed it.

Well, not because of the dress, but,
well, because I was... I felt as though

was looking at the world from some
wonderful hiding place.

Well, it's difficult to explain.

Come on. Come on, Paul. Let it out.

By the craziest coincidence, I saw this
woman at the party.

She was...

older, and dressed like a man.

She seemed to know exactly where I was
at.

She came over to me and never said a
word.

Just took my hand and led me away from
that party.

We went to my apartment, and for the
first time in my life, I felt alive.

My nerves seemed to energize to surge It
was like some magic force had taken

over my body and was going to explode
between my legs

I

Had always been intimidated by women

The terrible specter of sexual failure
clung to me with dead fingers.

But Lisa's wonderful abandon, her
natural, joyous appetite for love,

her ache to touch and be touched, her
look, the way she moved,

her whole essence orchestrated for the
act of love swept my passion beyond my

fear, beyond my consciousness.

And I responded.

God, how I responded.

Thank you.

Take me. Take me.

I loved her.

I was hers.

I was possessed.

And that was the first time you ever
made love to a woman?

Yes. And she's the only woman that I've
ever loved.

And when did you see her last?

Three years ago.

She died.

Automobile accident.

And since then?

No one, really.

Well, I've tried.

I've tried.

Okay, Paul.

We'll take it from here Friday.

Same time.

Same time.

Goodbye. Still okay for tonight?

Oh, of course.

I'll pick you up after work.

Just remember the address.

How could I forget?

We'll see you later.

You are walking on eggshells, honey.

Good afternoon, Dr. Tracy's office.

Well, how about it, baby?

You mind after the performance tonight?

Not tonight. Sorry, Andy.

I thought we were all set.

I can't talk now.

Call me tonight.

Is this the way you talk to a star?

Tonight.

I'll talk to you tonight.

Hey, Andy, come in here.

Hey, Andy, get your ass in here.

That

was

Julie, wasn't it?

Jesus, she has you standing on your
head.

Fuck off.

Don't get mad, honey.

I don't care who you fuck, as long as I
get mine.

Hey, I thought this was going to be a
foursome.

There's plenty to eat here.

Does your mind take me on, you pussy?

I'd rather have it there than when your
girlfriend Julia keeps hers.

Now, what's that supposed to mean?

It means that weirdo Paul Howard.

She's been seeing that creep for weeks.

Hasn't she, Jack?

That's the rumor.

Anyway, don't get me involved, huh?

You know, I think making those fuck
films has softened your brain.

Wow.

Oh. Oh.

I adored being with Paul.

He was such fun and so easy to be with.

We seemed always to be laughing at silly
things or at nothing at all.

I loved his face, the gentle brown eyes
that surrounded and warmed my heart.

The half -smile that teased was never
unkind.

To me, he was the most beautiful man I
had ever met.

And yet, there was something.

He was almost too gentle, too passive.

More than anything now, I wanted him to
take me, to love me strongly,

forcefully. I wanted to drown in his
passion.

But whenever I approached, he withdrew.

The pain was too much.

I prayed so hard tonight would be
different.

Whenever I reach out to him, the door
closes.

I don't understand.

I feel so hurt and angry.

Hello, Andy.

Where are you?

Okay. Come on over.

Hey, Julie, honey?

Listen, I'm going to make myself a
drink. Would you like one?

Well, it's about time.

And why the hell am I sitting here
drinking as if I hadn't had enough?

I resent you coming in here with your
fly open.

Well, so what? So I'm honest.

I mean, I can't help it if I'm obvious,
you know. I let it all hang out.

You certainly do.

Oh, come here now, come here.

I'd love to make you laugh.

Oh, Julie, baby, you know, I can't help
it if you just don't like my style, you

know, but you know.

There's just nobody, nobody in this
world that turns me on like you do.

Julie, baby.

My baby.

Nobody in this world treats me like
that.

Julie.

Let's go to the bedroom. Come on.

Thank you.

I'd never made a film about lesbians,
even though the theme had always

fascinated me.

It seemed to me that the quality of
their love was different, deeper, more

erotic.

The mystery of a woman's love for a
woman, its depth, passion,

its fulfillment were facets of the human
condition that I could barely imagine.

Still the mystery of that private world
stimulated me Rarely had any sexual

manifestation proven so exciting

What's the matter, Stephanie?

At least you could have called.

I can understand a man playing games
like this, but a woman shouldn't be so

devious.

Called? I don't understand.

Oh, you cooked dinner. Stephanie, I'm
sorry. Really, I am.

I forgot. Please forgive me.

Why shouldn't? For getting me that way.

You went out for dinner?

Yes, with Dee Dee and James Heath.

Care for a cocktail?

No, not now.

I'm tired.

I think I'll take a shower and go to
bed.

I guess I had my expectations up.

James was very nice, and I wanted him to
come up, but he declined.

Now I'm feeling a little frustrated.

So, I'll take a shower, and I'll go to
bed.

I have a drink for you.

Lynn, I love your breasts.

The way your nipples come alive when I
touch them.

I can take the edge off for you.

I can make you relax.

Will you let me try?

Yes.

Again, I was looking at that familiar
stranger.

My mind burning with the images of the
film by the fire of their flesh.

I wanted my body to burn in that fire.

I wanted those lips to part and tongues
of fire to sear my flesh.

I wanted to be consumed in the oven of
their secret sex.

Is Paul here yet?

Yeah, he's inside.

Damn.

That Andy, it's like having lunch with a
centipede.

I think he's cute. Listen, whenever
you're through with him... He's all

Please.

Paul's different?

Different? God, Paul's from another
planet.

Gentle, considerate. Andy never gets his
mind above his navel.

Don't knock it, baby.

Hey, I've got an idea. You busy Sunday?

Not particularly.

How about staying over Saturday night?

Why? What's up?

Never mind.

I've just got an idea.

Okay. Surprise me.

Go on, Paul.

And after that, I become so involved
with the mannequin that I lose all

with the real world.

When I feel that hard, smooth face, I
become

excited.

I wanted to fondle me, hold me,

kiss me.

And yet I know it can't. Does the
thought of being kissed or fondled by a

person, man or woman, ever excite you?

It frightens me. Does it repulse you?

It frightens me.

I feel my chest tighten and my hands
sweat.

I try to fight it, but it's no use.

This young lady you were out with the
other night, were you uncomfortable with

her? No, not at all.

Not until the very end.

And then I... I just said goodnight and
left her standing there.

I wonder what she must think.

Do you intend seeing her again? I want
to.

Very much.

She's the first girl I've been attracted
to since... Since, uh...

Do you think I should see her again?

I think you should do what you want to
do.

Now, getting back to that fantasy again,
I don't know why or what does it,

but some word or look of Polly in that
film triggered me.

And then it begins.

Reality... How can I explain it?

Reality fragments in slow motion and
feeds energy into my... darkest dreams,

and then my fantasy comes to life.

Hmm.

I swallow it all the way down.

Go deeper!

Oof.

Oh yes.

And when I came out of it, I was sick.

Physically sick.

And frightened.

It was all so real.

And lately it's been getting worse.

Because we're coming close to the nerve.

Therapy is no rose garden, Paul. It's
blood and sweat and damn hard work.

Just remember those keys.

We'll find them.

Okay, Paul.

We'll take it from here Friday.

Same time.

Same time.

Hi.

Hi. Would you be interested in my plans
for this Sunday?

Fascinated.

Spend the day with you. Can you make it?

You've just caught me available.

I'm glad.

I'll call you.

Andy. Hey, Gordon.

There once was a man from St. Paul who
claimed he only had one ball.

Those son of a bitches pulled down his
britches and found he had none at all.

Shit. And I thought I finally had you.

Uh, where's the princess?

Out.

What do you mean out?

I'd like her to stay out.

We were supposed to go out.

I mean, did she leave any kind of a
message? I even brought my camera.

Read this.

Dearest Joyce, have an early date with
Paul.

Please wait. Have a surprise for you,
Julie.

What's the surprise?

You are, I think.

I don't get it.

I mean, it's not like her. If she wanted
to break the date, all she'd have to do

is call me.

I know it's not like her, but she knows
what she's doing.

Do you want a drink?

Yeah.

I'll have a drink.

Thank you, Jess.

You know, you're a very pretty girl.

If you got rid of that shrink of yours,
maybe I'd get you a screen test.

Yeah, with Horny Harry of Pubic
Productions.

No thanks. No, no, legit.

I've got my camera.

Sit down. Let me get a few pictures.

All you have to do is look beautiful.

Move this from you.

Why did I do this?

I'm crazier than you are. Come on, right
up on the ball.

I'm concentrating.

Is that what you call it?

My creative juices are coming to a head.

I feel it too.

All right.

That's it.

Come on, throw those arms up now. I want
you to be free, free to express

yourself. Throw them.

Wait a minute.

Oh, you're Aphrodite.

Hello, Troy.

You're crazy.

Oh, you're Venus.

We often went to the park and I loved
it. Daisy days, I called them. Sweet and

happy. Paul always liked to end up with
a carriage ride and always with the same

driver.

Sandra was an old friend of Paul, a
model he used to photograph.

She was lovely and Paul seemed more than
a little attractive.

And why not?

She exuded sex with easy and natural
grace.

More than once I felt Paul drawn to her
and had to fight my jealousy.

But then we would settle back and Paul
would laugh and I would laugh and the

world would turn into a daisy again.

I won't bite.

At least, not yet.

I really can't stay, Julie. Of course
you can.

We're all alone and all's right with the
world.

Oh, Paul, I do like you so much.

I could eat a whole apple pie.

Something is wrong.

God damn it!

I'm wrong, can't you see that?

Are you stupid?

I'm wrong.

Andy.

Andy!

Andy! Andy!

What the hell are you doing here?

Oh, boy.

Where's Joyce?

Oh, she's gone.

Some more. Why are you still here?

We had a date, remember?

Didn't Joyce tell you I was out?

Oh, yeah.

With that weirdo, Paul.

You're going to be dead in a minute. Why
did you leave?

Because I was mad.

Because you stood me up.

And you're making a schmuck out of me,
and I don't want this.

Fresh air will help.

Get out!

Oh, shut up. I mean... What's the rush?
You expect me out creepo back?

Get out.

What's with you and that jerk anyway?

I mean, he's strange.

He's freaky.

I worked on two films with him, I know.

I caught him in the makeup room, putting
mascara on, running down his face. He

was crying.

Do I have to call the doorman to get you
out?

All right.

I'm going. All right.

You know this whole fucking world is
crazy?

You.

And me.

Joyce.

Everybody.

But, baby, let me tell you one thing.

That Paul...

He stands out.

Even among...

The image of Sandra wouldn't leave.

Her signals were loud and clear.

The look, the smile, the moves.

So deliberate, so knowing.

She had turned on a switch and she knew
it.

I wanted her.

Beyond understanding, I wanted her.

I wanted to be drawn into the well of
her lean thighs.

To have my sex drawn in the strong,
sinewy body.

Now.

I wanted her now.

Sandra.

Hmm.

Awww.

Oh, that was good.

Julie, baby, what is it?

Come on, tell Joycey.

Oh, Joyce, I don't know what to do.

I just don't know what to do.

Is it Paul?

He doesn't feel the same way?

That's just it. He does.

I know he does.

And I love him.

Nothing seems to happen.

The other night...

I threw myself at him and he turned from
me like I was some kind of a monster.

He literally ran from me.

Then Andy implied all kinds of dreadful
things about Paul.

You mean he's gay?

No.

Freaky, weirdo things. Things I couldn't
even understand.

Maybe Andy's lying. I don't know.

You knew the risk when you started to
see him.

That's just it. I don't know.

I don't know what his problem is or what
the risk is.

If I knew, maybe I could help him.
That's the doctor's job, baby.

Give it time.

I guess you're right. Look, it's almost
five o 'clock. Go home. I'll finish

typing. Oh, no, Joyce.

Thanks, but I'm almost finished.

I'm all right, really.

Well, call me if you get the bluesies or
want to get bombed. I will.

Promise? I promise.

I've never had one of these inside me.
But what pleasure will you get?

The feel of your body. Our breasts
touching.

Your hard nipples touching mine. The
satisfaction of giving you pleasure.

obscure reason, the film now depressed
me.

I felt terribly lonely.

I tried walking it off, but I couldn't
shake it.

My mind was on Julie.

I was overcome with a need to see her,
to lose myself in the warmth and

tenderness of her love.

But I couldn't bring myself to call her,
to hurt her again.

My need for Julie was tearing at me.

It seemed to come deep within my soul.

I could feel her pulsing life, warmth,
even the smell of perfume.

Was I completely mad?

Look into my eyes, Paul.

See my love, my soul.

I can feel her breath, hold her
softness.

Paul, darling Paul, know it's me, alive,
loving.

Eating. Oh, please be real.

Oh, God, please be real.

It hurts.

Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh.

Amen.

time I saw Paul and Julie was on one of
my occasional walks in the park.

They were feeding nuts to the squirrels,
and looking at them, I felt rather

pleased. Though to be honest, I was
angry at the son of a bitch for taking

the best secretary I ever had.

As for me, well, as a good teacher
learns from his students, so a good

learns from his patients.

And for what I learned from Paul, I'll
be eternally grateful.