All language subtitles for hope.and.faith.s02e16.hdtv.xvid-tcm

Here you go.

Enjoy your picnic.

Watch out for Yogi and Boo Boo.

I can't believe how well my picnic
baskets are selling.

I can't believe my head shots aren't
selling.

That wind machine cost me a lot of
money.

What are you working on there?

A screenplay.

I'm tired of waiting for the perfect
role to come along, so I decided to

one for myself.

Really? What's it about?

The Faith Fairfield story.

Kind of like that Ray Charles movie,
only a little more inspirational since I

had more to overcome.

Remember my lazy eye?

I remember the lazy part.

Anyway, all I needed was some rich
businessman to finance it.

Well, good luck with that.

I signed us up for the rehearsal hall at
3 o 'clock.

Justin and I are doing a duet for the
school talent show.

I thought you were going to sing by
yourself. I was, but apparently one of

kids has to be in it.

Excuse me, are you the creator of these
wonderful baskets?

Yes. Well, I'm throwing a cocktail party
honoring Clifford Bing for donating

money to our music department, and I
need a really good creative caterer.

Isn't Clifford Payton, like, rich?

Yeah, he owns, like, half of Glen Falls.

Oh, I'm not a professional caterer. Oh.

That's only because she doesn't pay
taxes.

Oh, that's just great.

We're accepting proposals tomorrow at
the Glen Falls Executive Suite. There's

car.

And I pay my taxes.

Come on, Hope.

I need a job.

God knows you need a reason to get up in
the morning.

And if this all goes well, you could own
25 % of my catering company.

Okay, so I do all the cooking. And what
do you bring?

My name, Hope.

Do you really think that Paul Newman
makes that salad dressing?

Or that Sally Fields makes those
cookies?

Makes all that soup.

Celebrity sells hope.

Excuse me.

Can I get like 20 of those?

See? I still got the sizzle. Matter of
fact, give me all you got.

I'm over at the fry booth. We ran out of
newspaper to catch all the grease.

So who should I make these out to?

Now look, we really want to get this
job, so why don't you not speak at all?

But I prepared the menu and the budget.
Well, all right, fine.

But is that what you're going to wear?

I thought I would, since I'm wearing it.

And we're here.

I got a good feeling about this, Hope.

I think we'll look back and remember
this as the first day of the rest of my

life.

You know what, Faith? I have to say,
it's great seeing you excited about

something else besides acting. Hey, save
the butt kissing for Arlene.

Okay, ladies, you're up.

Lovely. Did you lose weight?

Well, maybe just a little.

I want to remind you, the hotel will
provide the waiters, but you will be

responsible for your prep staff.

Great.

Here's our proposed menu and budget.

So, Arlene, Clifford Bing?

Nice guy.

Approachable. Brings his checkbook to
events.

So, as you can see, we've added a touch
of everything from Asian to

Mediterranean. It looks delicious, but I
know that Mr. Bing is looking forward

to more of a seafood buffet.

Ah, that's our specialty.

Shrimp, lobster, caviar, blowfish.

Blowfish?

Isn't that poisonous?

Oh, everything good is.

Look, Arlene, we'll dress this dump up
and give it a whole oceanic theme.

Everyone will find Nemo delicious.

It'll be a fish -tacular.

A fish -tacular.

I see it.

I'm sold.

No one else can do seafood on this
budget.

Let me get the paperwork.

Are you out of your mind?

How are we supposed to do all that?

We can do anything, Hope. That's why we
named our company You Gotta Have Faith.

No, we didn't.

Then why?

Is it on our business cards?

You make business cards?

Yeah, but two names cost more, so you'll
have to write yours in.

Faith, we cannot afford to do a seafood
buffet.

Sure we can.

We just won't pay the prep staff.

And how are we supposed to get a prep
staff to work for free?

I'm not saying it's going to be easy.

But you four give me your best here
tonight, and I can guarantee that you

have a future with You Gotta Have Faith
caterers.

And I want you to stay positive.

Stay enthusiastic.

And stay the hell away from the buffet.

If I catch any of you stuffing your
faces on the job, you're fired.

I think what Faith is trying to say is,
thank you all for doing this.

Good caterer, bad caterer. I like it.

You heard me, people!

Why don't you go out to the banquet room
and check on everything? I'll start

sending out the appetizers.

Fine, but remember, we only have ten
oysters, so tell the waiters to keep

tray moving. You only bought ten
oysters?

What?

You mean caught.

Let me tell you something. Those mamma
jammas can swim.

Faith.

Everything looks wonderful.

People are raving about the food.

And have you heard about our special
entertainment?

Mr. Bing's favorite singer, Mr. Barry
Manilow, is going to be here.

Isn't that exciting?

Well, it would be if I was a heavyset
woman with a gay best friend.

Personally, I'm more excited to see Mr.
Clifford Ka -ching Bing.

Oh, well, he's right over there.

Excellent. Would you excuse me, Arlene?
I have to make an important calamari.

Tar -tar, as we say in the trade.

I got it.

Is this real fur?

Of course.

Then I'll just hang it up by a trap so
it feels comfortable.

Okay, you two, break time.

Why don't you run outside and get some
fresh air? But it's cold out there.

So? Grab a coat.

Cool ching chilla.

Where's Faith? The sirtuna corn cakes
with crown fresh and caviar haven't gone

out. The what?

The smelly fishy things.

Go take those out. Look for your aunt.

This is a lot of work. Are you sure you
want to go into the catering business?

Especially with your sister?

Charlie, this is for my sister.

Faith is really excited about us being
in business together.

I haven't seen her this excited about
anything.

Except acting.

What about when the new phone book came
out?

Well, to be fair, her name was in it.

The point is...

This might be just what she needs to
move on with her life.

You know what?

I think she's given up on Hollywood.

Excuse

me.

Faith Fairfield?

Star of TV stage?

A fire safety video to fulfill a court
order?

The big screen.

How do you do?

What I'm offering you, Clifford, is the
opportunity to get in on the ground

floor of, and I don't want to oversell
it here, the greatest movie ever made.

The Faith Fairfield story.

Picture this.

Faith Fairfield presents a Clifford Bing
production of a Faith Fairfield film

starring... Faith Fairfield.

I'm not interested.

Fade in. Glen Falls, Ohio, 1975.

A beautiful little girl is covered in
chicken pox.

She desperately struggles not to
scratch.

But she does.

And forever has a tiny little scar right
here. Can you see that?

And to this day, she still struggles to
go sleepless.

I'm in a meeting.

Steven Spielberg is on the phone for you
in the kitchen.

And she's really angry.

Will you excuse me, CB?

Spielberg really wants to get in on this
picture, but I mean, come on.

Schindler's List? It was all right, but
it was no Hogan's Heroes.

Excuse me.

Wow, Aunt Faith, you look beautiful.

Maybe you could wear... that to the
school talent show.

Justin, it's a fourth grade talent show.

I gotta show a lot more skin than this
if we're going to win.

If you'll excuse me.

Thank you.

You two keep your mouth shut and I'll
let you check coats at the Oscars.

I don't have time for small talk, Hope.
Now quick, hand me another tray of those

smelly fishy things.

Where are you wearing those earrings?

What? A caterer can't accessorize?

What's next, Hope, huh?

We can't vote? We can't marry? We can't
ride in the front of the catering truck?

This is America, Hope.

Or at least it used to be.

What are you doing?

What? So now a caterer can't... I can't
wear couture.

Where does it end, Hope? Faith!

All right, look.

I pitched my movie to Clifford Bing, and
he seems pretty intrigued.

I think he might want to finance it.

Ow! I cannot believe you. You never
wanted us to go into business together.

Catering isn't my dream. It's yours.

No, it isn't. Well, it should be. You
looked happier scraping crap out of the

shrimps than you looked on your wedding
day.

I guess I was just hoping you had given
up on Hollywood.

Why should I give up on Hollywood?

Because it's given up on you.

I'm sorry, Faith.

But what is so wrong about having a
normal life?

Normal lives are for normal people,
Hope.

And I am abnormal.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a very
important business meeting to finish

over by the shrimp tempura, which, by
the way, is a little soggy. There.

I said it.

There you are, CB.

Now, I've told you all about the
protagonist of the Faith Fairfield

have not yet told you about the villain.

It's her evil older sister, Dope, who
tries to keep Faith down in Glen Falls

because she's insanely jealous of her
fame and fortune.

Have you told them about your palatial
estate over my garage?

Oh, great.

Excuse me.

Faith, the only reason Hope is doing
this whole catering thing is to help

But as usual, all you want to do is help
yourself.

Just for that, Danny DeVito is playing
you in my movie.

Could you help me with this?

Sure. Oh.

Don't rub it in. Let me get some club
soda.

So, is our guest of honor enjoying
himself, I hope?

Well, I'm trying to. But this ditzy
blonde keeps trying to sell me on some

screenplay. You mean Faith Fairfield.

I noticed she was here.

She's an amazing actress.

Wow. If she says she has a screenplay, I
bet it's fantastic.

I'd sure invest in it.

But I'm just a totally unbiased caterer.

Who loves a good biopic like the rest of
America.

Well, there.

All out.

Well, thank you for your help.

Here you go.

You know, you really amaze me.

You're always helping me out no matter
what.

Ah, go put your pretty dress back on
and... Talk to Mr. Bing. Nah, I can

I want to help you out for a change.

I mean, you may think that you've done
all this for me, but look around you,

Hope. You're the star here.

I mean, your slimy little crusty things
on toast, people love, though.

And those crumbly little throw -up
doodads, I can't get enough of them.

You were born to do this.

Because of you, this party is a hit.

This party is a disaster.

It is? Why?

Mr. Harry Manilow's plane has been
delayed.

I don't know what I'm going to do.

Arlene, what is the name of this
company?

Excuse me? What is the name of the
company you hired to cater this party?

You've got to have faith.

Exactly. So have some. Now, get out
there and stop.

What do you think you're doing? What do
you mean?

It's showtime!

May I have everyone's attention?

Oh, boy.

What's going on?

Barry Manilow is late, and Faith has a
plan.

Faith has a plan?

For scariest words in the English
language.

I regret to inform you that Mr. Barry
Manilow has been delayed.

Oh, no.

But we still have entertainment.

Please join me in welcoming the musical
stylings of me, Faith Fairfield.

You grab the kids, I'll start the car.

And Justin Schenau...

You're the top.

You're the Louvre Museum.

You're a melody from a symphony by
Strauss.

You're a bundle bonnet, a Shakespeare
sonnet, you're Mickey Mouse.

You're the Nile.

You're the Tower of Pisa.

You're the smile on the Mona Lisa.

I'm a worthless check, a total wreck.

You're the purple lights of a summer
night.

It was a wonderful party.

And Clifford loved the entertainment so
much, he doubled his donation to the

music department. Bravo, bravo.

Thank you.

I'm proud of you, honey.

I'm proud of me, too.

Three more people asked me to cater
their event.

Actually, four.

But one of them wanted Justin to pop out
of a cake.

How much did they offer?

I thought you were just doing this
catering thing for Faith.

Well, so did I. But you know what?

It's time I did something for myself.

People love my funghi crostini.

Those crumbly little throw -up doodads.

Those are tasty doodads.

I really want to do this.

And I think I'll call my company,
There's Always Hope.

And Faith.

Congratulations on a great party.

Oh, well, I couldn't have done it
without you.

So, when's our next big event?

You really want to do this?

I thought you were abnormal.

You know what I realized, Hope?

You're pretty abnormal yourself.

And together, I think we can do some
pretty substandard things.

What do you say?

I'd say you need to buy a dictionary.

If I agree to do this with you, you
can't just quit.

You have to make a real commitment.

Okay.

Okay.

Oh, and I already got us another gig.

But Justin has to jump out of a cake.

No, no.

I'm not letting Justin jump out of a
cake. Why not?

What are you talking about? It's a weed
-free cake. What could be bad?