All language subtitles for watch_banged_up_abroad_s15e10_hdtv_h264-rbb_-_voe_content_delive

I was a rebel and a party girl.

But I had big ambition.

I wanted money and power.

You're on your own.

But it was a man's world.

And I had to fight to get it.

I was running with the real big guys.

Our product is the best.

I felt invincible.

I was gonna be the dame of cocaine.

Hey, chill, guys.

I thought, I'm so clever that they will
never catch me.

In 1994, I was 31 years old, living in
Berlin,

working as a striptease dancer.

I grew up in a very, very small town in
Germany.

My father was a very successful
businessman, and I'm his only daughter.

My dad has tried to keep me at home.

But I wanted to leave that tiny little
village and that life.

So I left for Berlin.

I was always looking for more.

For adventures.

I wanted to travel the world. I wanted
to meet different people.

I wanted to have excitement.

I became the party girl and I loved
trucks.

In Berlin they were everywhere.

Whenever I wanted, whatever I wanted.

I found the truck business very
exciting.

And one night...

Wanna try? Listen?

Wanna try? I was partying with these
underground bosses who used

to have heaps of drug connections.

And they told me about the special
hotels in Quito, Ecuador.

You can buy really good quality cocaine
from the Colombian cartel.

And I thought that's exciting.

That's right.

I was ambitious and I was driven.

I thought the truck business could bring
me success.

But it was pretty much a man's world.

One night after work, we were winding
down.

And there was this guy standing there.

And immediately I was drawn to him. I
thought, yeah, wow.

Very sexy.

And we started talking and talking.

And his name was Werner.

I found out he lives in Melbourne. Even
he was German origin.

But he was on the run and living on a
fake passport.

I used to be a bad boy.

I found it very, very thrilling. You
know, this was like, hmm,

criminal attraction to me.

That was my kind of guy.

We had wild sex.

It was two with a wild stranger.

Can I say the word?

Werner was 18 years older, and probably
your parents

were a nightmare.

Werner told me that he had left his
criminal past behind him, and that he's

having a clean, fresh start now in
Australia.

And I knew I have to go where this guy
is living, so I

went to Australia.

I thought Australia would be a whole new
great adventure for me.

I was thrilled. I was excited.

And if I want to stay in Australia, I've
got to marry Werner.

Baby, you're married.

But very soon, reality set in and

it was just not as exciting as I thought
it should be.

When I wanted some cocaine, it wasn't
that easy to access.

There's no good cocaine around here.

None? No.

Anything which is rare, of course, is
more expensive.

Drugs in Australia, three times the
price than in Berlin.

I spotted the gap in the market pretty
fast.

So I thought, well...

That's my opportunity to show them what
a woman is capable of doing, and I can

bring them a party they will never
forget.

But I want to be independent from
anyone, especially Werner, my husband.

So I told Werner I need to go on
holiday, and he

bought it.

They grew this plan inside of me that I
will take my striptease money and go to

Ecuador Quito You can buy really good
quality cocaine from the Colombian

To go and find this hotel

When I arrived, all I felt was
excitement.

I was hoping to find in this hotel in
Ecuador the right people to bring

some cocaine back into Australia.

I could sense this must be the

owner of the hotel.

Hola.

One tequila, please.

I needed him to introduce me to the
cartel.

But you can't go straight to the point.

I thought let's get him to party a bit
with me.

He realized, oh gosh, this woman can

drink tequila as much as any Ecuadorian
man.

Maybe would there be some cocaine
available?

We started to have these lines of
cocaine.

I told him about the situation in
Australia, that they don't have as much

cocaine as one would think.

And then I've noticed, ah, yeah, yeah,
he's getting the drift, you know.

And he said, I actually do know guys in
Colombia.

I do have contact to the cartel, really
straight to the top.

So I said, I want to be introduced to
buy a few kilos.

He said to me, first of all, you've got
to show them that you do have

the balls.

You're going to go to Colombia?

You cannot fly or anything.

You've got to go through the jungle,
past the border, without getting a stamp

into your passport.

Then they might offer you to do business
with them.

I thought, great, here is my chance.

I wasn't thinking twice about it. I was
just saying, okay, off we go.

The next day, he showed me the border to
Colombia.

He showed me on the map where I had to
go.

There. I wasn't really sure what was in
the jungle.

I mean, I pictured all those things,
like snakes, crocodiles, poisonous

You're on your own.

Don't get caught.

I was not trying to think of anything
but the goal.

So I just tried to stay focused and that
one foot after

the other and walk through it.

Anyone else would have returned after
half an hour.

But I had big ambition.

I wanted money and power and I had to
fight to get it.

Of course, there were moments of despair
when I wanted to turn around, when I

didn't want to continue.

But I would never, ever have turned
around.

Failure was never an option.

So there was no way I was going to win.

After four or five hours, I stumbled out
of the jungle, and then I saw this

guy.

I had no idea if they ever even would
accept a woman.

I mean, this is here again a more male
-dominated world.

He was heavily armed.

They have those huge guns.

There was only the option either I die
or I survive.

I tried to tell myself to stay calm, but
one wrong move and

I wouldn't live to tell the story.

He looks at me.

There are not many other European women
stumbling out of this jungle.

But yeah.

It's just you, Andrea!

Yeah, it's just not it.

I got a little bit frightened.

But I would never lose faith in front of
the guys.

I got very nervous.

He drove me through the jungle to like a
little production factory

of cocaine.

Hi.

Our product is the best.

to not get as easily detected by the x
-ray.

Cocaine is sealed into slippers.

So you could transport 10 kilos?

He tells me it's only interesting for us
if you buy like 100 kilos.

Okay.

I had to make clear that I had only the
money now to buy seven kilos.

And if I get, like, these first loads
sold, I can get the money for a

higher amount.

We got a deal.

I paid 70 ,000 US dollars, but he made
clear where the lines are.

If you ever get caught, you don't know
me and you have never been here.

If I get interrogated by the police and
mention him, well, I

would be killed.

Now, I had to get the cocaine back into
Australia.

I'm about to walk through customs with
seven kilos of

cocaine in my bag.

I was thinking you're going to be in
serious trouble for this amount.

Where are you coming from?

Enjoy your stay.

Hi.

I have to say I felt a bit of fear, but
then there was no turning back.

Where are you coming from?

I said I'm just coming from a lovely
holiday in Ecuador.

Do you have anything to declare?

Well, I have... seven kilos of cocaine.

But I said, nothing to declare except a
suntanned skin.

And he said, Welcome to Australia.

Thank you.

That was it.

And The rush I had after was exciting,
was really good.

It's a thrill of getting away, but it's
also a thrill of success.

I didn't tell my husband anything about
what I've done.

I still stick with the story. I was
having a holiday.

And the deception made me feel powerful.

It made me feel in charge.

And I had the best sex ever after.

Now I'm back and I got the seven kilos
to move.

I knew this guy before I left who would
have cash to buy a few kilos.

Best I've ever had.

You got yourself a deal. I had the
money, so the job was done.

Where'd you get this?

All those men, those Australian guys,
couldn't deliver.

Don't you worry about that.

And the real big guys in Colombia, they
are...

Doing business with me, you see?

Only with me.

In my eyes, I was the queen.

This is only the start of my business.

I was seen to open a new train from
South America to

Australia.

Now, I had the money to buy again, so I
bought even more.

Then for the next go, this can go much
higher.

I was now really at a point where I
could start something, where I could

start a really good business going.

Okay. See you then.

When it gets more than 100 kilos.

It has to be moved by ship.

I traveled to South America.

I handed over the money.

And for the next three years, I
organized shiploads of cocaine.

Four or five deals a year.

The little woman coming from this little
town in Germany is doing worldwide big

business.

I had more than a million US dollars in
the cupboard.

It was very thrilling, and I couldn't
let go of it.

I was the Dame of Cocaine.

Werner didn't ask too much because he
knew my father was very wealthy.

I thought now

I made it.

I'm taking over the man's world.

I was such a fool.

Doing all these operations on my own was
now a big challenge.

I couldn't share anything with anyone.

I had to play a role.

I felt lonely.

I thought that success would bring me
happiness, but it

doesn't. It doesn't now.

Werner was asking how we could afford
this, that or the other.

You do things behind my back.

Of course, I couldn't explain it.

Let me. Who are you, my father?

And so we also fought a lot.

I can do what I want.

It all led up to being more and more
empty and isolated from everything.

So when Werner asked me again... What's
going on?

I thought maybe it is time to get
truthful with him.

I had been working with the Colombian
cartel.

I told him I was taking shiploads of
cocaine from South America

into Australia.

I just thought, I can't take it all on
my shoulders.

And I thought maybe if I share it with
Werner, he will help me.

But I didn't know what he would say.

He'd be lying to me all the time.

At first, he was pretty pissed off.

But then he took it as a challenge of
himself and wanted to get involved.

I should do it.

I'm the man.

I guess he wanted to go to show, you
know, that he is much cleverer, that he

do it better to satisfy his ego.

But I felt a sense of relief.

I thought maybe I should trust him.

I made a phone call to the Colombians
and I told them that this time the

gonna be picked up by my husband.

Yeah, not me.

I just hope you don't fail me.

Don't mess this up.

It's gonna work out fine.

I got the flights booked.

So he was ready to go on this trip.

Okay.

But the rest, I left it all up to him.

A few weeks later, Werner flew to pick
up cocaine from the

cartel.

And when he was gone, the Colombian
phoned me.

The drugs have to get picked up. They
can't just lay there.

Every day, Werner changed something of
this itinerary.

And I got all these invoices.

He was shopping in Berlin, in Milano, in
Paris, everywhere.

It was weird.

It was feeling really bad.

I thought he was a big time. I had this.

horrible feeling.

I did take more and more drugs to cope.

And the cocaine makes you paranoid.

I was suddenly feeling all the time ice
on me.

The stress and the paranoia, they did
get so intense.

I tried to blind myself doing heroin.

It was my mind.

A few weeks later, when I finally came
home

with the cocaine.

Hi, baby.

After all these weeks being gone, I'm a
mess.

So I was really happy to see him.

He looked happy, and out of a sudden I

heard a huge noise.

Police was storming my house.

When I was screaming,

Suddenly I had a gun pointed to my head.
I thought, I'm going to be

shot any second.

I'm going to be shot now.

The police got the cocaine and said, we
got it, we got it, we found it.

The detective turned around towards me
and said, we've got much more on you.

We've got far much more than you ever
think of.

You'll never ever get home again.

I'm in complete frozen shock.

It was the end of the day of cocaine.

From the moment of the arrest, they
separated Werner and me.

So I was driven alone to the Melbourne
Custodial Centre.

The police officer said, with every word
you have been saying the

last six months.

He explained they had listening devices
and every part of the house was bugged.

I thought, well, some... How about this
hotel?

The next eight hours, they were playing
the tapes to me.

They were saying, tell us all about your
husband's involvement.

And who else is involved in Colombia, in
Melbourne.

If I betray the Colombian, there would
be a dead person. That was for damn

So I always only said, no comment.

He said to me, you're done.

You're not going to see him.

daylight anymore.

I got taken out of the van at the
women's prison.

I actually wanted to

fall apart, crawl some corner and cry.

But yeah, I couldn't.

A screw took me in reception and I got
my first lip search

ever.

Open your mouth.

She combed through my hair with her
fingers.

Spread your legs.

Spread them.

And then I had to bend over and spread
my ass.

Grab yourself and get dressed.

I've been a 50s dancer and I was never
shy of being naked.

But it felt like my soul is stripped.

I wasn't a person anymore. I was a
prisoner with a criminal record number,

145768.

Of course, this was a very different
world.

I had no more power and no more control.

I tried just to forget everything, but I
couldn't.

I was about to fall apart, I think. I
became aware I've been in prison now.

And I felt really scared.

It was very noisy.

They were banging inside their cells at
the wall.

Suddenly, my door opened.

A woman barged in. One jumped on the bed
on top of me.

saying, come on, German, get out and
play a little bit.

Don't be boring, German. Come on.

I think some women were very dangerous.

I had the allowance of a call with my
family.

My parents knew already that I'm in
prison.

I didn't know what to say. What can I
tell them?

My mom came on first.

Hello, Mutti?

I'm so sorry.

No,

no.

Please don't come.

She handed the phone over to my dad.

He tried to say hello, but he couldn't
get the word out.

And then I heard this sobbing, and this
was heartbreaking for me.

I'm so sorry.

I always wanted to make my dad proud of
me.

But I did quite the opposite.

I made him feeling ashamed of me.

I hurt him really bad.

This was the moment when it did hit in,
what have I done to my family?

What have I done? I never thought of
them. I never before.

I was such a selfish... This

was the lowest and the most painful
moment.

In my entire life.

I have to go.

I'll call you as soon as I can.

I was in prison now, and I, yeah, and I
couldn't see how I ever get out of this.

My husband, Werner, was in tremendous
prison, and I certainly missed him.

I missed him very much.

But then I finally get my trial.

Of course, I was afraid to death of
being in prison forever.

I was sitting next to Werner.

The lawyer had this surveillance on
tape, and I heard about the

total extent of Werner's betrayal.

I am going to take an ex -girlfriend
with me. She thinks we are going on

holiday. Werner took his ex -girlfriend
with him.

to get the drugs from Colombia.

And I suspect he was having an affair.

And then it gets much worse.

I am going to be hiding a whole lot of
cocaine in her bag.

He wanted to abuse and use his ex
-girlfriend as his mule.

And she had no idea.

I felt like not only that he lied to me,
I just think this is love.

I felt complete disgust and no love
anymore.

All love was gone.

Werner pleaded not guilty.

He's a fool.

He's just a fool.

So Werner got...

13 years because he didn't show any
remorse.

But I pleaded guilty and I

got sentenced by the judge for eight
years.

After the sentencing, I told Vernon that
I would file for divorce.

I didn't care anymore.

He could just get...

Eight years is a long time, especially
behind bars.

I tried just to forget everything and
anything, but I couldn't.

So one day, this woman, Tiny, she

offered me drugs.

She offered me heroin.

I wanted to escape.

She pulled out the needle and she pulled
out the plunger.

We made the mixture and we were shooting
it up.

From that moment on, I was completely
out of it.

There were trucks in there, a ship load.

It was really bad in there.

I had to numb my brain, my feelings, my
everything.

So I did take more and more drugs.

Drugs was all I had to cope.

But one day, they called all the
prisoners into the hole.

Everyone get up. Time to go. Follow me.

We were going to be drug tested.

I knew I was because I had been taking
drugs.

Any more?

Positive. And I knew the consequences.

21 days in the slot in solitary
confinement.

From then on, my life was out of my
hands.

I was alone, no human contact,

no cigarettes,

no drugs, nothing anymore.

I was afraid to live without the drugs.

I got panic attack.

I hardly slept.

He told me what got him.

I was going berserk in that I started to
throw out my toenails.

Pulling out your toenails is self
-harming.

The real pain, which just doesn't stop.

But pain can be a trust.

Because the minute the pain sets in,
your thoughts to get distracted just

this drug.

But as the days went on I couldn't hide
anymore.

All I could think about was all of the
bad choices I made.

And all the people, especially my
family, I did hurt.

I had to deal with my demons.

My dad had the sense that the man has to
be tough, and the woman is allowed to

be weak.

I wanted to prove him wrong, and the
cocaine business made me feel powerful.

But I wasn't.

I thought about being addicted to drugs
all these years.

And I decided I didn't want to be that
person anymore.

I learned that I don't have to be always
the strong one, the one in charge, the

one in power.

It's also okay to be vulnerable.

I had to change my life.

Well, by the time I came out of the
slot, I had a whole new perspective

to how I would serve my time.

I stopped taking drugs.

It was much easier than I thought.

I was so relieved when I finally made
this decision, and I felt so much better

than I thought I would feel.

I decided to become a peer worker to
help other prisoners.

I decided to change this culture where
drugs seem to be a positive way to cope

with prison.

We have a program to help you get clean.

Yeah? I thought it might be useful.

Instead of getting each other drugs in,
we could help each other by applying for

bail.

filling in forms, helping the ones who
can't read and write.

Over the next three years, I started a
diary to write about everything I've

through in the past, and everything was
started to happen each day.

It made me happy, really happy, and so
happiness became my new

highness and my new addiction.

This is an addiction I can live with, I
thought.

On the morning of my release day, 16 of
August 2004,

I'll never forget the day, I got my life
back,

which I don't want to throw away
anymore.

My little hometown, the place I always
tried to run away from, was

the one place I couldn't wait to get
home to.

Because it was home.

It is home.

The Dame of Cocaine is a figure of the
past.

It was a very long journey to realize
that I don't need drugs or power.

I didn't want to run away from myself
anymore.

Finally, I proved to my dad and myself
that women can be successful.

Because that little diary I started and
failed became 800 pages.

It turned this diary into a book, and it
became a bestseller in Australia.

My parents were proud of something I had
done.

After all those roles I played, now I'm
finally just Andrea and I figure that's

the best one.