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1
00:00:21,255 --> 00:00:23,424
Man: To arms! To arms!
The British are coming!
2
00:00:23,457 --> 00:00:26,527
The British are coming!
To arms! To arms!
3
00:00:28,729 --> 00:00:31,465
Mike: In america in 1775,
most of US Americans
4
00:00:31,499 --> 00:00:33,234
were afraid of the British.
5
00:00:33,267 --> 00:00:34,968
Oh, but, of course,
some Americans
6
00:00:35,002 --> 00:00:36,670
weren't afraid
of them at all.
7
00:00:39,273 --> 00:00:41,242
Reggie, baby!
8
00:00:43,577 --> 00:00:45,513
It's safe!
9
00:00:45,546 --> 00:00:48,482
He's gone to fight
your regiment
at Lexington.
10
00:00:48,516 --> 00:00:49,817
Oh, good show!
11
00:00:57,391 --> 00:00:59,260
Yes, back in those days,
12
00:00:59,293 --> 00:01:01,262
the American woman
admired the englishman
13
00:01:01,295 --> 00:01:03,097
for many things--
14
00:01:03,131 --> 00:01:05,333
the smart way he dressed--
15
00:01:05,366 --> 00:01:08,536
in contrast to their beatnik
American husband.
16
00:01:08,569 --> 00:01:10,671
Also, the englishman
was so proper.
17
00:01:10,704 --> 00:01:13,174
He always did
the so-proper thing
18
00:01:13,207 --> 00:01:15,209
at the so-proper time.
19
00:01:15,243 --> 00:01:17,545
Brisk instant tea,
my dear.
20
00:01:17,578 --> 00:01:20,581
Reggie, baby,
you think of
everything!
21
00:01:24,685 --> 00:01:27,321
Not quite, my dear.
22
00:01:27,355 --> 00:01:29,290
Lovely shot, old man!
23
00:01:31,125 --> 00:01:33,894
Hold my cup, darling,
will you?
24
00:01:33,927 --> 00:01:35,596
( Gasps )
25
00:01:43,371 --> 00:01:45,206
Well, that's how it was
with the englishman
26
00:01:45,239 --> 00:01:47,308
and the American woman.
27
00:01:47,341 --> 00:01:49,143
And unfortunately,
for US American men,
28
00:01:49,177 --> 00:01:51,745
it's still going on today.
29
00:01:51,779 --> 00:01:54,382
Well, this is the story
of an englishman--
30
00:01:54,415 --> 00:01:56,350
Bruce Patterson--
31
00:01:56,384 --> 00:01:58,352
who was a neighbor of mine
during the time
32
00:01:58,386 --> 00:02:00,221
he was associate professor
of archeology
33
00:02:00,254 --> 00:02:02,022
at a California university.
34
00:02:02,055 --> 00:02:03,757
**
35
00:03:27,941 --> 00:03:29,977
( All chewing gum )
36
00:03:42,756 --> 00:03:44,758
Oh, no! Listen!
37
00:03:44,792 --> 00:03:46,560
Listen!
38
00:03:46,594 --> 00:03:48,462
Radio announcer:
Miss Helen bushmill--
39
00:03:48,496 --> 00:03:49,830
well-known west coast
fashion designer--
40
00:03:49,863 --> 00:03:52,099
today announced
her engagement
41
00:03:52,132 --> 00:03:54,335
to British archeologist
Bruce Patterson.
42
00:03:54,368 --> 00:03:55,803
No.
It can't be.
43
00:03:55,836 --> 00:03:57,338
Impossible.
44
00:03:57,371 --> 00:03:59,273
Mr. Patterson at present
45
00:03:59,307 --> 00:04:01,141
is associate professor
of archeology
46
00:04:01,174 --> 00:04:03,377
at California university.
47
00:04:03,411 --> 00:04:05,078
I can't believe it.
48
00:04:05,112 --> 00:04:07,281
Yesterday he was so
wonderfully eligible.
49
00:04:07,315 --> 00:04:08,916
Yeah, well,
they aren't married yet.
50
00:04:08,949 --> 00:04:11,385
Let's draw straws
to see who kills her.
51
00:04:11,419 --> 00:04:13,521
Really, miss Turner.
52
00:04:13,554 --> 00:04:15,556
Oh, professor,
I'm sorry.
53
00:04:15,589 --> 00:04:17,725
I hope you'll be
very happy.
54
00:04:17,758 --> 00:04:19,927
Not if you draw
the short straw.
55
00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:21,395
Oh, professor Patterson?
56
00:04:21,429 --> 00:04:23,263
Yes, miss pilkington?
57
00:04:23,297 --> 00:04:26,534
I most sincerely wish you
and your beautiful
miss bushmill
58
00:04:26,567 --> 00:04:28,802
the very best
of British luck.
59
00:04:28,836 --> 00:04:30,971
Thank you,
miss pilkington.
60
00:04:31,004 --> 00:04:33,607
Naturally, you
would understand.
61
00:04:42,450 --> 00:04:45,886
Now, where did we
leave off?
62
00:04:45,919 --> 00:04:49,557
Oh, yes, the jolly old
cro-magnon man.
63
00:04:49,590 --> 00:04:51,359
Good looking fellow,
isn't he?
64
00:04:51,392 --> 00:04:53,794
Uh, very much
like the modern man,
65
00:04:53,827 --> 00:04:57,931
except for the fact that he,
as you notice, has a gap.
66
00:04:57,965 --> 00:05:00,934
As man gradually
progressed through the ages
67
00:05:00,968 --> 00:05:03,371
and became more and more
civilized,
68
00:05:03,404 --> 00:05:06,273
the teeth became
gradually more even
69
00:05:06,306 --> 00:05:08,676
and the gap disappeared.
70
00:05:08,709 --> 00:05:11,412
I rather think it gives him
something, in a way.
71
00:05:11,445 --> 00:05:13,481
( Laughing )
72
00:05:13,514 --> 00:05:16,917
There is a theory
that the gaps were used
73
00:05:16,950 --> 00:05:20,788
to make animal noises,
bird noises, signals,
74
00:05:20,821 --> 00:05:23,757
and also to decoy
other birds and animals.
75
00:05:23,791 --> 00:05:26,394
Um, this is purely
a theory, of course--
76
00:05:26,427 --> 00:05:28,195
I don't know whether
it's true or not--
77
00:05:28,228 --> 00:05:31,031
but I have carried out
some personal experiments,
78
00:05:31,064 --> 00:05:33,934
and at least I do know
that it's practical.
79
00:05:33,967 --> 00:05:37,405
For instance,
an English linnet Finch.
80
00:05:37,438 --> 00:05:39,540
( Imitating bird call )
81
00:05:43,677 --> 00:05:47,381
I hope you'll forgive me
for giving you the bird.
82
00:05:47,415 --> 00:05:49,783
( Laughter )
83
00:05:49,817 --> 00:05:51,852
**
84
00:05:57,591 --> 00:05:59,092
Mike:
Professor Bruce Patterson
85
00:05:59,126 --> 00:06:01,595
lives on the beach
in Santa Monica
86
00:06:01,629 --> 00:06:03,797
in a house he rents
from his fiancée--
Helen bushmill--
87
00:06:03,831 --> 00:06:07,100
who is in Paris on business,
viewing the new fashions.
88
00:06:07,134 --> 00:06:09,837
I live in that elegant
trailer on the left.
89
00:06:09,870 --> 00:06:11,739
Here I am,
doing what I usually do
90
00:06:11,772 --> 00:06:14,374
when I'm not studying law
or chasing girls.
91
00:06:14,408 --> 00:06:16,109
And speaking of girls,
92
00:06:16,143 --> 00:06:18,512
I happen to live
with this underslung female
93
00:06:18,546 --> 00:06:20,280
who is named Jessica,
94
00:06:20,313 --> 00:06:22,249
after an underslung
maiden aunt of mine.
95
00:06:22,282 --> 00:06:25,318
Jessica also is very fond
of the professor...
96
00:06:25,352 --> 00:06:28,355
Just like most
American girls.
97
00:06:28,388 --> 00:06:30,758
American girls really dig
the professor's
British charm.
98
00:06:32,693 --> 00:06:34,495
Oh, good afternoon,
Jessica.
99
00:06:34,528 --> 00:06:37,230
( Yawns )
100
00:06:37,264 --> 00:06:38,699
Don't tell your master
I'm home.
101
00:06:38,732 --> 00:06:40,501
I've got some papers
to correct.
102
00:06:40,534 --> 00:06:42,202
But maybe Jessica
is mercenary.
103
00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:44,672
Knowing the professor
is an archeologist,
104
00:06:44,705 --> 00:06:47,741
she probably figures
someday he'll come up
with some bones for her.
105
00:06:50,210 --> 00:06:52,613
( Humming )
106
00:07:00,353 --> 00:07:03,557
But here in his bachelor flat
on the pacific,
107
00:07:03,591 --> 00:07:05,292
the professor can relax
108
00:07:05,325 --> 00:07:07,861
and get away from all those
amorous college girls.
109
00:07:07,895 --> 00:07:10,163
He can brew his tea
and dream of getting
married for the first time
110
00:07:10,197 --> 00:07:12,566
to Helen bushmill.
111
00:07:12,600 --> 00:07:15,335
The professor thinks Helen
also is getting married
for the first time.
112
00:07:15,368 --> 00:07:17,671
But unfortunately,
Helen, like most women,
113
00:07:17,705 --> 00:07:20,808
hasn't told him everything
about her past--
114
00:07:20,841 --> 00:07:23,644
especially one little thing
that just happened
to have happened
115
00:07:23,677 --> 00:07:25,112
17 years ago.
116
00:07:25,145 --> 00:07:26,547
Mother?
117
00:07:30,417 --> 00:07:31,919
Mother?
118
00:07:36,156 --> 00:07:37,558
Mother!
119
00:07:50,538 --> 00:07:51,939
Mother?
120
00:08:06,086 --> 00:08:08,288
"To Bruce--
121
00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:10,057
"with all my love.
122
00:08:10,090 --> 00:08:14,261
Just you forever."
123
00:08:14,294 --> 00:08:16,129
( Humming )
124
00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:22,703
* this old man,
he played one *
125
00:08:22,736 --> 00:08:24,838
* he played knick-knack
on my drum, ooh *
126
00:08:24,872 --> 00:08:26,607
* with a knick-knack,
paddy-whack *
127
00:08:26,640 --> 00:08:27,841
* give a dog a bone
128
00:08:27,875 --> 00:08:29,910
* this old man
came rolling home *
129
00:08:29,943 --> 00:08:31,511
( humming )
130
00:08:31,545 --> 00:08:33,280
Mike: Hey, professor?
131
00:08:33,313 --> 00:08:34,948
Hmm? Ho.
132
00:08:34,982 --> 00:08:37,651
Michael? Yes,
I'm in the bedroom.
133
00:08:37,685 --> 00:08:40,020
I brought our
telephone back.
134
00:08:40,053 --> 00:08:42,189
Oh, thanks.
135
00:08:42,222 --> 00:08:45,425
Help yourself to
a refreshing glass
of soda water.
136
00:08:45,458 --> 00:08:47,628
You read what's left
of my mind.
137
00:08:47,661 --> 00:08:49,229
Sweet of you, professor.
138
00:08:49,262 --> 00:08:50,363
What's sweet?
139
00:08:50,397 --> 00:08:51,965
I mean,
it was sweet of you
140
00:08:51,999 --> 00:08:54,534
to build a doghouse
for Jessica.
141
00:08:54,568 --> 00:08:58,271
Doghouse?
It just arrived.
142
00:08:58,305 --> 00:09:01,108
Ah, I'll be.
A bone.
143
00:09:01,141 --> 00:09:03,844
A bone?
It's the leg bone
of a dinosaur.
144
00:09:03,877 --> 00:09:05,378
Catch it around here,
did you?
145
00:09:05,412 --> 00:09:07,447
As a matter of fact...
146
00:09:07,480 --> 00:09:08,816
I came across it
purely by accident
147
00:09:08,849 --> 00:09:10,450
while I was digging
last summer
148
00:09:10,483 --> 00:09:12,686
in an area quite some way
from their natural habitat.
149
00:09:12,720 --> 00:09:14,855
I sent it to Baxter
at Oxford.
150
00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:18,592
He said this is between
57 and 58 million years old.
151
00:09:18,626 --> 00:09:20,728
Hmm. I'd drink
to that, professor,
152
00:09:20,761 --> 00:09:23,030
but you've goofed.
You're, uh...
Out of scotch.
153
00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:25,065
There's plenty in
the cabinet over there.
154
00:09:29,737 --> 00:09:32,539
No scotch,
but lots of gin.
155
00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:34,642
I'm sure it's there.
156
00:09:40,447 --> 00:09:42,850
Hmm. I must be cracking.
157
00:09:42,883 --> 00:09:44,752
Fantastic devils.
158
00:09:44,785 --> 00:09:46,586
Someday I'll write
a book about them.
159
00:09:46,620 --> 00:09:47,988
Got the perfect
title for you--
160
00:09:48,021 --> 00:09:49,556
raising dinosaurs
in your backyard
161
00:09:49,589 --> 00:09:51,224
for fun and profit.
162
00:09:51,258 --> 00:09:52,626
Hmm? A ha!
163
00:09:52,660 --> 00:09:54,261
Careful, Michael!
What?
164
00:09:54,294 --> 00:09:56,296
Oh. Adolph--sorry.
165
00:09:56,329 --> 00:09:59,633
Difficult to find
decent shrunken heads
these days.
166
00:09:59,667 --> 00:10:01,068
Your troubles
are over, professor.
167
00:10:01,101 --> 00:10:03,070
I have got a laundry
that can shrink anything.
168
00:10:03,103 --> 00:10:05,038
Which reminds me,
I gotta pick up
some shirts.
169
00:10:05,072 --> 00:10:06,874
Got a hot one on
for tonight.
170
00:10:06,907 --> 00:10:08,508
Ah, and I must
buzz off.
171
00:10:08,541 --> 00:10:10,811
I'm dining with
professor bowman--
172
00:10:10,844 --> 00:10:14,514
not to mention
his lovely lady wife.
173
00:10:14,547 --> 00:10:17,050
Bowman--that's the guy
that's competing
against you
174
00:10:17,084 --> 00:10:18,485
for the same
digging Grant, huh?
175
00:10:18,518 --> 00:10:20,020
Not much competition,
I'm afraid.
176
00:10:20,053 --> 00:10:21,955
The college is bound
to give him the Grant.
177
00:10:21,989 --> 00:10:25,525
He's got seniority,
and he's a most
excellent man.
178
00:10:25,558 --> 00:10:28,628
Do you know, Michael,
if they did give me
the Grant,
179
00:10:28,662 --> 00:10:30,397
Helen and I
could go digging
180
00:10:30,430 --> 00:10:33,000
for the rest of
that fellow in the desert
on our honeymoon.
181
00:10:33,033 --> 00:10:35,135
What?
182
00:10:35,168 --> 00:10:38,238
You see, when Helen
gets back from this trip,
183
00:10:38,271 --> 00:10:40,640
she and I plan to spend
a whole year together,
184
00:10:40,674 --> 00:10:43,576
just digging.
185
00:10:43,610 --> 00:10:45,779
Sounds cozy.
186
00:10:45,813 --> 00:10:47,681
Just you two
and the sand flies.
187
00:10:47,715 --> 00:10:49,049
( Growling )
188
00:10:49,082 --> 00:10:51,151
Jessica! What on earth
are you doing?!
189
00:10:51,184 --> 00:10:53,420
Shame, Jessica!
And you just
had dinner.
190
00:10:53,453 --> 00:10:54,788
( Growling )
191
00:10:54,822 --> 00:10:56,223
You're a very
naughty dog.
192
00:10:56,256 --> 00:10:58,225
Come on, sweetheart.
193
00:10:58,258 --> 00:11:00,761
You don't care whose
heart you break, do you?
194
00:11:00,794 --> 00:11:02,763
Michael, this is
a very valuable bone!
195
00:11:02,796 --> 00:11:04,097
It's you or me,
professor.
196
00:11:04,131 --> 00:11:05,766
Either you get
a smaller bone,
197
00:11:05,799 --> 00:11:07,300
or I get
a bigger dog.
198
00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:08,869
Come on.
199
00:11:18,011 --> 00:11:19,747
Mmm.
200
00:11:23,483 --> 00:11:25,018
( Humming )
201
00:11:33,560 --> 00:11:34,762
( Bottle clanks )
202
00:11:34,795 --> 00:11:36,429
Michael?
203
00:11:38,531 --> 00:11:40,167
( Humming )
204
00:11:43,804 --> 00:11:45,806
( Clatter )
205
00:11:45,839 --> 00:11:48,341
Is that you, Michael?
206
00:11:48,375 --> 00:11:49,910
( Clatter )
207
00:11:51,779 --> 00:11:53,313
Michael?
208
00:12:00,220 --> 00:12:01,789
Ah-choo!
209
00:12:04,557 --> 00:12:06,159
Ah-choo!
210
00:12:06,193 --> 00:12:09,462
Jessica, what are
you doing in there?
211
00:12:10,630 --> 00:12:11,799
What the devil?!
212
00:12:13,300 --> 00:12:16,703
No, don't be angry.
I didn't do anything.
213
00:12:16,736 --> 00:12:18,705
You must be in
one of my classes.
214
00:12:18,738 --> 00:12:20,073
Classes?
No, no classes.
215
00:12:20,107 --> 00:12:20,941
You--
216
00:12:22,876 --> 00:12:25,078
you must be
"prehistoric maiden"
217
00:12:25,112 --> 00:12:26,746
or "young but willing",
218
00:12:26,780 --> 00:12:28,248
and if so,
where's your shovel?
219
00:12:28,281 --> 00:12:29,950
Let me go!
220
00:12:29,983 --> 00:12:32,319
I'll put a stop
to this nonsense
once and for all.
221
00:12:32,352 --> 00:12:34,154
You're all the same,
you sex-minded
college girls.
222
00:12:34,187 --> 00:12:36,123
I've never been
to college!
223
00:12:36,156 --> 00:12:38,058
Explain all that
to the police.
224
00:12:38,091 --> 00:12:39,827
Aah! Ah!
225
00:12:42,429 --> 00:12:44,564
Oh!
226
00:12:44,597 --> 00:12:47,034
What are you doing
to me?!
227
00:12:47,067 --> 00:12:50,270
No! You let me
out of here!
228
00:12:50,303 --> 00:12:51,839
No!
229
00:12:54,474 --> 00:12:56,576
Let me out!
230
00:12:56,609 --> 00:12:58,511
( Shouting )
231
00:13:00,047 --> 00:13:02,115
What are you doing?
232
00:13:03,316 --> 00:13:05,152
Quiet.
233
00:13:05,185 --> 00:13:06,820
No!
234
00:13:06,854 --> 00:13:08,288
You there, operator.
235
00:13:08,321 --> 00:13:10,223
No!
236
00:13:10,257 --> 00:13:11,959
Get me the police.
I've got a wayward
girl here.
237
00:13:11,992 --> 00:13:14,427
I'm not one of
your students!
238
00:13:14,461 --> 00:13:15,996
( Sobbing )
239
00:13:17,464 --> 00:13:18,999
Never mind.
240
00:13:22,135 --> 00:13:24,337
You're not really
one of my students?
241
00:13:25,873 --> 00:13:27,307
I'm really not.
242
00:13:27,340 --> 00:13:29,242
All right.
243
00:13:30,477 --> 00:13:32,112
Very sorry.
244
00:13:32,145 --> 00:13:34,181
But you can easily
make mistakes, you know.
245
00:13:34,214 --> 00:13:35,883
All you girls
look alike,
246
00:13:35,916 --> 00:13:38,018
dress alike
and act alike.
247
00:13:38,051 --> 00:13:39,819
Who are you, then?
248
00:13:41,521 --> 00:13:43,223
Libby...
249
00:13:43,256 --> 00:13:44,958
Smith.
250
00:13:44,992 --> 00:13:47,895
Where do you
come from, miss Smith?
251
00:13:49,930 --> 00:13:52,866
Originally or lately?
252
00:13:52,900 --> 00:13:56,436
I mean, what are you
doing in my house?
253
00:13:58,972 --> 00:14:01,008
Is this your house?
254
00:14:01,041 --> 00:14:02,910
Well, I pay the rent.
255
00:14:05,245 --> 00:14:07,247
Well...
256
00:14:07,280 --> 00:14:10,250
I came looking
for some food.
257
00:14:10,283 --> 00:14:12,385
See, I haven't eaten
since yesterday,
258
00:14:12,419 --> 00:14:15,555
and i'm
awfully hungry.
259
00:14:15,588 --> 00:14:17,590
You're really hungry?
260
00:14:19,459 --> 00:14:21,561
Well...
261
00:14:21,594 --> 00:14:24,264
Never mind. I'll find
someplace else.
262
00:14:24,297 --> 00:14:27,400
No, no, no, no, no.
If you're really hungry,
263
00:14:27,434 --> 00:14:29,602
I couldn't possibly
turn you away.
264
00:14:31,538 --> 00:14:32,505
Where's the kitchen?
265
00:14:32,539 --> 00:14:33,941
Through here.
266
00:14:38,178 --> 00:14:40,747
Oh, by the way,
i'm, uh--
267
00:14:40,780 --> 00:14:42,249
do forgive me,
but I was just--
268
00:14:42,282 --> 00:14:44,117
oh, that's all right.
269
00:14:44,151 --> 00:14:46,653
I'm professor
Bruce Patterson.
270
00:14:46,686 --> 00:14:50,057
Hope you'll forgive me
for treating you
so harshly, but...
271
00:14:50,090 --> 00:14:53,293
Believe it or not,
young women have done
this sort of thing before.
272
00:14:53,326 --> 00:14:54,962
Oh, it was really
my fault.
273
00:14:54,995 --> 00:14:57,130
I shouldn't have
sneaked in like that.
274
00:14:57,164 --> 00:14:59,166
But it looked like
such a friendly house,
275
00:14:59,199 --> 00:15:00,833
and that picture
in there--
276
00:15:00,867 --> 00:15:03,070
she looks so friendly.
277
00:15:03,103 --> 00:15:04,637
That's my fiancée,
and she is friendly.
278
00:15:04,671 --> 00:15:05,738
Well, I must
finish dressing.
279
00:15:05,772 --> 00:15:07,307
Help yourself
to the fridge.
280
00:15:07,340 --> 00:15:08,841
Have all you want,
and then, uh...
281
00:15:08,875 --> 00:15:10,443
Run along, eh?
282
00:15:18,618 --> 00:15:20,920
Why haven't you eaten
since yesterday?
283
00:15:20,954 --> 00:15:23,723
I ran away
from boarding school.
284
00:15:23,756 --> 00:15:26,693
Well, why didn't
you go back to
your parents' house?
285
00:15:26,726 --> 00:15:29,196
It's just my mother.
286
00:15:29,229 --> 00:15:31,264
I don't think
she wants me around.
287
00:15:33,300 --> 00:15:34,767
Having a daughter my age
288
00:15:34,801 --> 00:15:36,603
probably makes her
feel old.
289
00:15:36,636 --> 00:15:38,338
Well, that's rotten.
290
00:15:38,371 --> 00:15:39,872
Oh, well, you'll
have to go back
291
00:15:39,906 --> 00:15:41,408
to boarding school,
won't you?
292
00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:43,110
( Mutters )
I'm going to stay
right here.
293
00:15:51,851 --> 00:15:54,554
I wanted to stay
in my own house.
294
00:15:56,856 --> 00:16:00,293
I gotta be honest
with you, eh?!
295
00:16:00,327 --> 00:16:03,496
It wasn't
a boarding school
I ran away from.
296
00:16:03,530 --> 00:16:05,798
It was a...
297
00:16:05,832 --> 00:16:07,834
Juvenile delinquent
institution!
298
00:16:07,867 --> 00:16:10,070
The--the cops
are after me!
299
00:16:10,103 --> 00:16:13,440
I'm on the run,
brucie baby!
300
00:16:15,708 --> 00:16:17,110
What did you say?
301
00:16:17,144 --> 00:16:19,479
Hey, you're proud of
them legs, ain't you?
302
00:16:19,512 --> 00:16:22,115
I'm sorry. I didn't
have time to dress.
303
00:16:22,149 --> 00:16:23,950
Cute, but not the length
they're wearing.
304
00:16:23,983 --> 00:16:25,552
Never mind about that.
305
00:16:25,585 --> 00:16:27,187
Tell me about the cops--
I mean the police.
306
00:16:27,220 --> 00:16:29,722
Well, that's why
I couldn't eat nothin'.
307
00:16:29,756 --> 00:16:31,858
Why, if I went into
one of them eatin' joints,
308
00:16:31,891 --> 00:16:33,593
they would've
spotted me like that.
309
00:16:33,626 --> 00:16:35,728
I'd have been sent back
and beaten all over.
310
00:16:35,762 --> 00:16:37,597
You mean they beat you?
311
00:16:37,630 --> 00:16:39,866
You want I should show you
my black-and-blues?
312
00:16:39,899 --> 00:16:41,968
No, no, no!
All right!
313
00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:43,270
Hey, pretty good
chicken.
314
00:16:43,303 --> 00:16:45,004
TV dinner,
or you cook it?
315
00:16:45,038 --> 00:16:46,573
No, I didn't.
Now, listen to me.
316
00:16:46,606 --> 00:16:48,908
Mmm! Our fiancée's
a good cook.
317
00:16:48,941 --> 00:16:50,477
My fiancée
didn't cook it.
318
00:16:50,510 --> 00:16:53,846
Oh, you got a gal that
cooks for you, huh?
319
00:16:53,880 --> 00:16:55,848
I thought guys
only played around
320
00:16:55,882 --> 00:16:57,784
after they got married.
321
00:16:57,817 --> 00:16:59,786
Listen to me,
I don't play around.
322
00:16:59,819 --> 00:17:01,388
Want some?
No, thank you.
323
00:17:01,421 --> 00:17:04,023
That chicken was kicked
by an elderly cleaning lady
324
00:17:04,057 --> 00:17:05,725
who comes in here
every week.
325
00:17:05,758 --> 00:17:07,327
( Doorbell rings )
Oh, crumb! Who's that?
326
00:17:07,360 --> 00:17:08,995
What are you
scared of?
327
00:17:09,028 --> 00:17:10,530
I'm scared--
I'm afeared--
328
00:17:10,563 --> 00:17:12,899
I mean, I'm afraid
of anybody finding me
like this
329
00:17:12,932 --> 00:17:14,201
with an attractive
girl like you.
330
00:17:14,234 --> 00:17:16,403
You think
I'm attractive, huh?
331
00:17:16,436 --> 00:17:18,371
Miss Smith, would you
mind getting out of here?
332
00:17:18,405 --> 00:17:20,807
Listen, if that's the
elderly cleaning lady,
333
00:17:20,840 --> 00:17:22,542
tell her I like
beef stroganoff.
334
00:17:22,575 --> 00:17:25,278
We never get that
at the delinquent
factory. Ha!
335
00:17:28,948 --> 00:17:30,683
Here, brucie baby!
336
00:17:30,717 --> 00:17:32,485
Oh, god!
337
00:17:32,519 --> 00:17:34,454
Oh! Just like
my old lady.
338
00:17:34,487 --> 00:17:36,022
You'd make
a good pair.
339
00:17:36,055 --> 00:17:38,125
You both hate kids.
340
00:17:38,158 --> 00:17:40,227
I don't hate anybody.
Now, hide in my bedroom.
341
00:17:40,260 --> 00:17:42,095
And where are you
gonna sleep?
342
00:17:42,129 --> 00:17:44,097
Young lady, I happen
to have a reputation.
343
00:17:44,131 --> 00:17:46,366
Ha! At this rate,
you're gonna keep it.
344
00:17:46,399 --> 00:17:49,436
Can you keep quiet?
All right, legs.
345
00:17:50,937 --> 00:17:53,306
( Laughs )
346
00:17:55,442 --> 00:17:57,810
( Doorbell ringing )
347
00:18:00,680 --> 00:18:02,315
Coming, coming.
348
00:18:04,117 --> 00:18:06,186
( Doorbell ringing )
349
00:18:13,893 --> 00:18:15,295
Coming.
350
00:18:17,497 --> 00:18:20,167
Mmm. Hiya, beautiful.
351
00:18:21,968 --> 00:18:23,836
( Humming )
352
00:18:25,438 --> 00:18:26,806
What's all
the racket about?
353
00:18:26,839 --> 00:18:28,141
Having a party?
354
00:18:28,175 --> 00:18:29,942
No, no.
355
00:18:29,976 --> 00:18:31,311
No, I'm all alone.
356
00:18:31,344 --> 00:18:33,112
Ooh, not anymore!
357
00:18:33,146 --> 00:18:37,016
I brought
a few goodies. Mmm!
358
00:18:37,049 --> 00:18:39,786
Baked them in my own
little oven!
359
00:18:39,819 --> 00:18:41,321
Just for you.
360
00:18:41,354 --> 00:18:43,423
Excuse me, you must
have the wrong house.
361
00:18:43,456 --> 00:18:46,726
Oh, don't you worry
about a thing.
362
00:18:46,759 --> 00:18:49,696
**
a little mood music.
363
00:18:49,729 --> 00:18:51,198
Got a little...
364
00:18:51,231 --> 00:18:52,665
( Humming
365
00:18:52,699 --> 00:18:54,201
mmm, mmm, mmm.
366
00:18:54,234 --> 00:18:56,068
Mmm!
367
00:18:56,102 --> 00:18:57,704
Some mood smell.
368
00:18:57,737 --> 00:19:01,508
And...romantic
candlelight.
369
00:19:01,541 --> 00:19:03,843
Ooh!
370
00:19:03,876 --> 00:19:05,745
There we go.
371
00:19:05,778 --> 00:19:09,316
And I picked these
myself. Mmm!
372
00:19:09,349 --> 00:19:11,818
Please, you must have
lost your way.
373
00:19:11,851 --> 00:19:13,953
Ooh! My specialty.
374
00:19:13,986 --> 00:19:16,223
Mmm.
375
00:19:16,256 --> 00:19:18,658
One of them, anyway.
376
00:19:18,691 --> 00:19:19,392
( Squeals )
377
00:19:19,426 --> 00:19:22,529
Now, here we go.
378
00:19:22,562 --> 00:19:23,830
Oh, dear.
379
00:19:23,863 --> 00:19:28,735
Ooh! Martini time!
380
00:19:28,768 --> 00:19:30,403
( Squealing )
381
00:19:32,205 --> 00:19:34,207
Oh, dear. Are you
in one of my classes?
382
00:19:34,241 --> 00:19:37,610
Me? I'm too dumb
for college.
383
00:19:37,644 --> 00:19:40,213
You--you can
call me Gladys.
384
00:19:40,247 --> 00:19:43,149
Now, sit down
and tell me
385
00:19:43,182 --> 00:19:47,520
how you got that--
ooh, that cute gray
in your temples. Hmm?
386
00:19:47,554 --> 00:19:48,921
It must be white by now.
387
00:19:48,955 --> 00:19:50,457
Look, miss--
uh, Gladys--
388
00:19:50,490 --> 00:19:51,758
Mike:
Stay there, Jessie.
389
00:19:51,791 --> 00:19:53,092
Call me when Gladys
gets here.
390
00:19:53,125 --> 00:19:54,594
I'm just going
for a drink.
391
00:19:54,627 --> 00:19:56,162
Is junior
coming here?
392
00:19:56,195 --> 00:19:58,265
Are you his Gladys?
393
00:19:58,298 --> 00:20:00,467
Well...he thinks so.
394
00:20:00,500 --> 00:20:02,502
Um, where am I
gonna hide?
395
00:20:02,535 --> 00:20:04,304
Oh, he has
a vicious temper!
396
00:20:04,337 --> 00:20:06,205
Oh! What are
you doing?
397
00:20:06,239 --> 00:20:08,741
Oh, what are you--
you're ruining--
398
00:20:08,775 --> 00:20:10,643
oh!
Oh!
399
00:20:10,677 --> 00:20:11,844
( Shouting )
400
00:20:14,281 --> 00:20:16,583
Mom, did you make
a boo-boo.
401
00:20:16,616 --> 00:20:17,950
Hide in the clothes
cupboard.
402
00:20:17,984 --> 00:20:20,787
In the who?
In the closet!
403
00:20:20,820 --> 00:20:22,422
I can't get in here.
404
00:20:22,455 --> 00:20:25,758
Your clothes
are too fat. Ha ha!
405
00:20:25,792 --> 00:20:27,794
Hide in the bathroom,
the bathroom.
406
00:20:27,827 --> 00:20:29,462
( Muttering )
407
00:20:31,097 --> 00:20:33,733
Bathroom? Ohh.
408
00:20:36,102 --> 00:20:37,704
( Clatter )
409
00:20:46,346 --> 00:20:47,847
( Sighs )
410
00:20:49,549 --> 00:20:51,684
Oh! Hello,
Michael.
411
00:20:51,718 --> 00:20:52,952
I need a drink.
412
00:20:52,985 --> 00:20:54,754
Please, help yourself.
413
00:20:54,787 --> 00:20:56,889
I've got to
finish dressing.
I'm late for dinner.
414
00:20:56,923 --> 00:20:59,225
Me, too. Gladys promised
to bring some food over.
415
00:20:59,258 --> 00:21:00,827
Hasn't shown up yet.
416
00:21:00,860 --> 00:21:03,496
How about that? Hmm.
417
00:21:05,398 --> 00:21:07,367
Gladys? Gladys?
418
00:21:13,540 --> 00:21:15,742
Who's this?
Never mind.
419
00:21:15,775 --> 00:21:18,077
Is this the woman
you're going to marry?
Shh!
420
00:21:18,110 --> 00:21:19,879
I hear you're
just stringing
the gal along
421
00:21:19,912 --> 00:21:21,414
to get free rent.
422
00:21:21,448 --> 00:21:22,915
( Whispers )
Quiet, please.
423
00:21:22,949 --> 00:21:25,318
Hey, professor?
I just remembered something.
424
00:21:25,352 --> 00:21:27,119
Michael, just a minute!
Just a minute!
425
00:21:27,153 --> 00:21:28,721
I'm changing!
426
00:21:28,755 --> 00:21:30,523
Oh! Oh!
427
00:21:32,892 --> 00:21:34,361
What are you doing?
428
00:21:37,096 --> 00:21:39,366
Under the bed.
Under the bed?
429
00:21:39,399 --> 00:21:41,568
Nobody ever asked me
to do that before.
430
00:21:41,601 --> 00:21:42,735
Can I come in a second?
431
00:21:42,769 --> 00:21:44,371
Just a minute,
just a minute!
432
00:21:49,409 --> 00:21:51,411
Okay, Michael--oh!
433
00:21:51,444 --> 00:21:52,945
Uhh! Mmm!
434
00:21:55,181 --> 00:21:56,783
Come on.
435
00:22:02,088 --> 00:22:03,456
What's the matter,
professor?
436
00:22:03,490 --> 00:22:04,891
Don't you like me
anymore?
437
00:22:04,924 --> 00:22:06,493
No, that isn't it.
Sorry, Michael.
438
00:22:06,526 --> 00:22:08,327
A little jittery.
What do you want?
439
00:22:08,361 --> 00:22:10,463
The laundry--
it was cluttered.
440
00:22:10,497 --> 00:22:11,831
( Telephone ringing )
I was just wondering
if I could borrow--
441
00:22:11,864 --> 00:22:14,000
borrow anything
you like. Sorry.
442
00:22:14,033 --> 00:22:15,968
( Thud )
443
00:22:16,002 --> 00:22:17,804
Hello?
444
00:22:17,837 --> 00:22:20,473
Professor Patterson?
Did you forget?
445
00:22:20,507 --> 00:22:22,174
Oh, no, no, Dr. Bowman.
446
00:22:22,208 --> 00:22:23,643
The dinner party?
447
00:22:23,676 --> 00:22:25,878
I'm so sorry.
I've been detained.
448
00:22:25,912 --> 00:22:27,380
Detained?
449
00:22:27,414 --> 00:22:30,450
Your dry Martini is
liable to get damp.
450
00:22:30,483 --> 00:22:33,152
Ha ha! Dry marti--
what's detaining you?
451
00:22:33,185 --> 00:22:35,221
Oh, um--
452
00:22:35,254 --> 00:22:37,924
oh, a most interesting
dinosaur bone
453
00:22:37,957 --> 00:22:40,393
I dug up in a most
unexpected place.
454
00:22:40,427 --> 00:22:42,795
Really? Where
did you find it?
455
00:22:42,829 --> 00:22:44,731
Oh. Heh. That would
be telling--
456
00:22:44,764 --> 00:22:46,165
( clatter )
Michael!
457
00:22:46,198 --> 00:22:47,434
What?!
458
00:22:47,467 --> 00:22:48,801
Boy, are you edgy.
459
00:22:48,835 --> 00:22:50,470
I told you the laundry
was closed.
460
00:22:50,503 --> 00:22:51,638
I want to borrow
a shirt.
461
00:22:51,671 --> 00:22:52,839
Shirt? Of course.
462
00:22:56,108 --> 00:22:58,010
Boy, that was fast.
463
00:22:58,044 --> 00:23:00,079
( Doorbell rings )
Someone's ringing
on my doorknob.
464
00:23:00,112 --> 00:23:02,114
I mean, somebody's
knocking on my doorbell.
465
00:23:02,148 --> 00:23:03,516
Michael, go and see
who it is, will you?
466
00:23:03,550 --> 00:23:05,051
Yeah.
Please.
467
00:23:05,084 --> 00:23:06,486
Wait--
468
00:23:11,458 --> 00:23:14,260
Dr. Bowman?
Yes, professor
Patterson?
469
00:23:14,293 --> 00:23:15,528
I'll be with you
in a half an hour.
470
00:23:15,562 --> 00:23:17,630
All right, professor.
471
00:23:19,532 --> 00:23:21,100
A dinosaur--
472
00:23:21,133 --> 00:23:22,669
a dino--
473
00:23:22,702 --> 00:23:24,437
he's found
a dinosaur bone!
474
00:23:24,471 --> 00:23:26,138
Gladys?
475
00:23:26,172 --> 00:23:28,140
Gladys!
Hello there!
476
00:23:32,411 --> 00:23:33,980
Is he gone, beautiful?
477
00:23:34,013 --> 00:23:36,048
No, but you are--
out the window.
478
00:23:37,884 --> 00:23:39,952
( Grunting )
479
00:23:39,986 --> 00:23:42,489
Oh!
480
00:23:42,522 --> 00:23:44,691
Professor, there's
a Bobby out here
481
00:23:44,724 --> 00:23:45,224
that wants to
talk to you about
some kind of--
482
00:23:45,257 --> 00:23:46,526
oh!
483
00:23:49,395 --> 00:23:50,797
Come on.
484
00:23:50,830 --> 00:23:52,632
( Squeals )
485
00:23:52,665 --> 00:23:54,501
Professor, I just
want to tell you--
486
00:23:54,534 --> 00:23:55,802
( grunts )
487
00:24:00,607 --> 00:24:02,909
Thank you. Thank you.
488
00:24:15,087 --> 00:24:18,390
I said there's
a Bobby out here.
489
00:24:18,424 --> 00:24:20,359
Bobby who?
490
00:24:20,392 --> 00:24:22,261
Police?
491
00:24:22,294 --> 00:24:25,231
( Stammers )
492
00:24:25,264 --> 00:24:28,234
You're not edgy.
You're over the edge.
493
00:24:28,267 --> 00:24:29,669
Yes.
494
00:24:34,206 --> 00:24:35,542
Yes, officer?
495
00:24:35,575 --> 00:24:36,709
You live here?
496
00:24:36,743 --> 00:24:38,645
Yes, at night.
497
00:24:38,678 --> 00:24:41,313
Heh! I'm so sorry.
Of course.
498
00:24:41,347 --> 00:24:44,116
Bruce Patterson--
professor Bruce Patterson.
499
00:24:44,150 --> 00:24:46,418
I see.
You called about
a wayward girl.
500
00:24:46,452 --> 00:24:48,588
Yes. A wayward girl?
501
00:24:48,621 --> 00:24:50,422
Oh, no. Oh, no, no.
502
00:24:50,456 --> 00:24:51,791
Somebody called
from this number,
503
00:24:51,824 --> 00:24:52,892
and they canceled
the call.
504
00:24:52,925 --> 00:24:54,326
Are you sure
it wasn't you?
505
00:24:54,360 --> 00:24:56,963
Oh, no, no. Michael...
506
00:24:56,996 --> 00:24:58,731
Have you been using
the telephone?
507
00:24:58,765 --> 00:25:00,366
I don't get rid
of wayward girls--
I collect 'em.
508
00:25:00,399 --> 00:25:01,868
( Laughs )
I see.
509
00:25:01,901 --> 00:25:03,502
I, sir, am only
a wayward customer
510
00:25:03,536 --> 00:25:04,871
of this quaint
old pub.
511
00:25:04,904 --> 00:25:06,472
He's a near neighbor
of mine.
512
00:25:06,505 --> 00:25:08,541
Actually,
he's right next door,
as a matter of fact.
513
00:25:08,575 --> 00:25:10,209
I see. You mind
if I look around?
514
00:25:10,242 --> 00:25:11,678
Oh, please do.
515
00:25:11,711 --> 00:25:13,479
Ah-ah-ah! You got
a search warrant?
516
00:25:13,512 --> 00:25:15,214
Do I have a what?
517
00:25:15,247 --> 00:25:17,249
A search warrant. See,
the law clearly states--
518
00:25:17,283 --> 00:25:18,785
Mike, Mike, Mike.
519
00:25:18,818 --> 00:25:20,820
See, he's studying law.
520
00:25:20,853 --> 00:25:22,722
By all manner and means,
do look around--
521
00:25:22,755 --> 00:25:24,991
in here, in the kitchen.
522
00:25:25,024 --> 00:25:28,494
Heh. Excuse me.
I'll finish dressing.
523
00:25:28,527 --> 00:25:30,597
Well, a jacket--
a dinner jacket.
524
00:25:30,630 --> 00:25:32,699
I'm going out to dinner
with some friends,
525
00:25:32,732 --> 00:25:34,601
and I was almost
ready to go.
526
00:25:34,634 --> 00:25:36,769
Excuse me, thank you.
527
00:25:39,338 --> 00:25:40,873
Lawyer?
528
00:25:43,643 --> 00:25:46,212
Gladys?
Hello there!
529
00:25:46,245 --> 00:25:48,380
Oh! Oh!
530
00:25:48,414 --> 00:25:50,650
Gladys!
Hello there!
531
00:25:53,085 --> 00:25:55,254
Gladys? Gladys?
Are you there?
532
00:25:55,287 --> 00:25:56,488
Are you there?
533
00:25:56,522 --> 00:25:57,957
Come on, come on.
534
00:25:57,990 --> 00:26:00,593
Oh, I was just
having some fun.
535
00:26:00,627 --> 00:26:03,963
Whoo! See how much fun
we can have together?
536
00:26:03,996 --> 00:26:05,331
( Laughs )
537
00:26:09,068 --> 00:26:10,803
Who does he think
he's kidding?
538
00:26:15,642 --> 00:26:18,611
You're so wonderful,
not cheating on a friend.
539
00:26:18,645 --> 00:26:20,246
I can't wait till
you two become enemies.
540
00:26:20,279 --> 00:26:21,748
Mmm!
541
00:26:21,781 --> 00:26:23,349
Thank you.
542
00:26:30,890 --> 00:26:33,626
Well, hello there.
Eloping?
543
00:26:33,660 --> 00:26:36,462
Oh, yeah.
I got a midget in here.
544
00:26:36,495 --> 00:26:38,364
Come on, wayward.
545
00:26:38,397 --> 00:26:40,099
Get out of here
before that policeman
finds you.
546
00:26:40,132 --> 00:26:42,902
Did that cleaning lady
bring my beef stroganoff?
547
00:26:42,935 --> 00:26:44,036
I've never
seen her before
548
00:26:44,070 --> 00:26:45,504
and, with
a little luck,
549
00:26:45,537 --> 00:26:46,639
I'll never see her
again, or you.
550
00:26:46,673 --> 00:26:47,840
Come on.
551
00:26:49,642 --> 00:26:51,543
Buy yourself
some food.
552
00:26:51,577 --> 00:26:52,879
Hey, is this for real?
553
00:26:52,912 --> 00:26:54,847
Hey, are you for real?
554
00:26:54,881 --> 00:26:57,616
Hey, I'll tell the gang
never to Rob this house,
all right?
555
00:26:57,650 --> 00:26:59,251
Hey, you're an ace.
556
00:26:59,285 --> 00:27:00,653
( Grunting )
557
00:27:00,687 --> 00:27:02,288
Thanks for
the loot, pal!
558
00:27:02,321 --> 00:27:03,723
Whoo!
559
00:27:09,095 --> 00:27:10,529
Mm! Gladys!
560
00:27:10,562 --> 00:27:12,064
Hi, junior.
561
00:27:12,098 --> 00:27:13,833
This the wayward girl
you called about?
562
00:27:13,866 --> 00:27:16,102
No, no--
hey, my wayward girl.
563
00:27:16,135 --> 00:27:18,637
Then what was she doing
outside his back window?
564
00:27:18,671 --> 00:27:20,206
His back window?
My back window?
565
00:27:20,239 --> 00:27:21,941
Your back window.
I got the feeling
566
00:27:21,974 --> 00:27:23,710
she just climbed out
of that window.
567
00:27:23,743 --> 00:27:25,845
Professor,
what's going on here?
568
00:27:25,878 --> 00:27:29,248
Gladys: Was
just coming over
to keep our date.
569
00:27:29,281 --> 00:27:32,151
Uh, is this
professor Patterson?
570
00:27:32,184 --> 00:27:35,587
Uh, no.
You said you were
going to introduce US.
571
00:27:35,621 --> 00:27:38,090
Professor Patterson,
Gladys schmidlapp.
572
00:27:38,124 --> 00:27:40,626
Schmidlapp.
How are you, professor?
573
00:27:40,659 --> 00:27:42,428
( Laughs )
574
00:27:42,461 --> 00:27:44,430
They make a charming
couple, yes?
575
00:27:46,065 --> 00:27:48,067
( Sighs )
576
00:27:48,100 --> 00:27:49,769
Lovely night,
isn't it?
577
00:27:51,403 --> 00:27:53,372
You ever seen
once of these before?
578
00:27:53,405 --> 00:27:54,874
It's something, isn't it?
579
00:27:54,907 --> 00:27:57,309
It's a dinosaur--
the shin bone.
580
00:27:57,343 --> 00:27:59,578
Which reminds me of the story
of the dinosaur--
581
00:27:59,611 --> 00:28:02,214
the three dinosaurs--
I don't know if you know.
582
00:28:02,248 --> 00:28:04,550
They were called
foot-foot-foot,
foot-foot and foot.
583
00:28:04,583 --> 00:28:06,786
And one day, foot-foot-foot
and foot-foot and foot
were playing,
584
00:28:06,819 --> 00:28:08,721
and foot said to foot-foot,
"foot-foot,
585
00:28:08,755 --> 00:28:10,156
I'm not feeling very well."
586
00:28:10,189 --> 00:28:11,858
And foot-foot
said to foot-foot-foot,
587
00:28:11,891 --> 00:28:14,026
"foot-foot-foot,
did you hear?
588
00:28:14,060 --> 00:28:15,327
Foot isn't feeling
very well."
589
00:28:15,361 --> 00:28:18,030
Well, to cut a long
story short, foot died,
590
00:28:18,064 --> 00:28:20,032
and seven weeks later--
or it might've been one--
591
00:28:20,066 --> 00:28:22,268
I don't think it matters
very much to the story at all--
592
00:28:22,301 --> 00:28:23,903
foot-foot-foot and foot-foot
were playing,
593
00:28:23,936 --> 00:28:25,537
and foot-foot
said to foot-foot-foot,
594
00:28:25,571 --> 00:28:27,006
"foot-foot--
foot-foot-foot--
595
00:28:27,039 --> 00:28:28,607
I'm not feeling very well."
596
00:28:28,640 --> 00:28:30,910
And foot-foot-foot said,
"I do hope you'll recover,
597
00:28:30,943 --> 00:28:32,845
because we've got one foot
in the grave already."
598
00:28:32,879 --> 00:28:34,781
( Laughs nervously )
599
00:28:45,524 --> 00:28:47,059
( Sighs )
600
00:28:48,895 --> 00:28:50,763
Did you notice
how nervous
601
00:28:50,797 --> 00:28:52,531
professor Patterson
was all evening?
602
00:28:52,564 --> 00:28:54,133
Yeah.
603
00:28:54,166 --> 00:28:57,103
Like a dinosaur
on a hot tin roof.
604
00:28:57,136 --> 00:29:00,139
Yeah. I couldn't get
a thing out of him.
605
00:29:00,172 --> 00:29:03,943
But that man
never goes below
the paleolithic age.
606
00:29:03,976 --> 00:29:07,346
Where did he find
that dinosaur bone?
607
00:29:07,379 --> 00:29:10,983
Hmm. You don't suppose
that englishman
608
00:29:11,017 --> 00:29:13,886
discovered it here
in California--
in Santa Monica?!
609
00:29:13,920 --> 00:29:16,022
Literally in
my own backyard?!
610
00:29:16,055 --> 00:29:18,524
I'm glad he found it.
611
00:29:18,557 --> 00:29:20,793
Our disposal
couldn't handle it.
612
00:29:20,827 --> 00:29:24,296
Where did he find--
oh! Ow!
613
00:29:24,330 --> 00:29:26,532
**
614
00:29:40,479 --> 00:29:42,514
"Dear professor,
615
00:29:42,548 --> 00:29:44,716
"thanks for the loan.
616
00:29:44,750 --> 00:29:46,785
"I never take money
from strangers
617
00:29:46,819 --> 00:29:48,821
unless I steal it."
618
00:29:48,855 --> 00:29:50,589
Hmm!
619
00:29:50,622 --> 00:29:53,993
"P.s.: Don't worry,
I've found a place to sleep."
620
00:30:16,682 --> 00:30:19,285
( Ringing )
621
00:30:24,323 --> 00:30:26,558
Hello?
622
00:30:26,592 --> 00:30:29,461
Oh, Paul.
How are you?
623
00:30:31,263 --> 00:30:33,332
Oh, lunch?
624
00:30:33,365 --> 00:30:36,702
I'm afraid I can't.
I've got to go
to a showing.
625
00:30:36,735 --> 00:30:42,108
Libby? No,
she's in school.
626
00:30:42,141 --> 00:30:44,376
Later?
627
00:30:44,410 --> 00:30:46,545
Well...
628
00:30:46,578 --> 00:30:50,216
Yes. I'll be there.
629
00:30:50,249 --> 00:30:51,951
Okay.
630
00:30:51,984 --> 00:30:54,486
Au revoir.
631
00:30:54,520 --> 00:30:57,356
**
632
00:31:07,466 --> 00:31:09,501
Helen! Mon cheri!
633
00:31:09,535 --> 00:31:11,603
Oh, Paul!
634
00:31:11,637 --> 00:31:14,073
How good it is
to see you!
635
00:31:14,106 --> 00:31:16,808
Hurry, I have
a surprise for you!
636
00:31:16,842 --> 00:31:21,613
Yeah. I have a surprise
for you, too.
637
00:31:25,952 --> 00:31:27,987
Ohh. Ha ha! Every time
I climb those stairs,
638
00:31:28,020 --> 00:31:29,655
they get higher.
639
00:31:29,688 --> 00:31:33,492
Mon cheri, you look
lovelier than ever.
640
00:31:33,525 --> 00:31:35,594
You're a charming
and a lying friend.
641
00:31:35,627 --> 00:31:37,496
Oh, no, no,
I mean it.
642
00:31:39,932 --> 00:31:41,600
Now, we both have
surprises.
643
00:31:41,633 --> 00:31:43,569
Hmm.
Which one first?
644
00:31:43,602 --> 00:31:44,836
Yours.
645
00:31:44,870 --> 00:31:46,105
All right.
646
00:31:54,680 --> 00:31:57,283
Oh, Paul,
it's lovely.
647
00:31:57,316 --> 00:31:58,350
Lovely?
648
00:31:58,384 --> 00:32:01,353
Oh, not my work--
my models.
649
00:32:01,387 --> 00:32:03,189
It's yours.
650
00:32:03,222 --> 00:32:04,856
A gift
from the artist
651
00:32:04,890 --> 00:32:08,160
who adores both--
mother and daughter.
652
00:32:10,562 --> 00:32:13,132
Why did it have to
happen this way?
653
00:32:17,803 --> 00:32:19,571
**
654
00:32:24,476 --> 00:32:26,712
( ringing )
655
00:33:07,386 --> 00:33:10,656
Wow. What happened?
The professor
cooking breakfast?
656
00:33:10,689 --> 00:33:12,358
We eat, sweetheart.
657
00:33:13,525 --> 00:33:15,327
Hey, teach?
658
00:33:42,354 --> 00:33:44,490
( Napping )
Over here, teach.
659
00:33:46,024 --> 00:33:48,427
Morning! Ha!
660
00:33:48,460 --> 00:33:50,829
Hey, what's that
you're wearing?
661
00:33:50,862 --> 00:33:53,999
Morning.
662
00:33:54,032 --> 00:33:57,869
Merely a device for
keeping the sea mist
out of my hair.
663
00:33:57,903 --> 00:34:00,639
Why are you sacking
out here?
664
00:34:00,672 --> 00:34:03,575
'Cause someone was
sacking in my bed.
665
00:34:03,609 --> 00:34:06,312
But there's a big couch
in there.
666
00:34:06,345 --> 00:34:08,447
This way, miss Smith,
667
00:34:08,480 --> 00:34:11,917
nobody could say
we slept under
the same roof.
668
00:34:11,950 --> 00:34:14,586
Oh. Anyway,
I made you some chow.
669
00:34:14,620 --> 00:34:16,088
( Yawns )
670
00:34:16,122 --> 00:34:17,456
Mike: Come on, Jess--
we eat!
671
00:34:17,489 --> 00:34:18,657
Crumbs!
672
00:34:20,126 --> 00:34:21,527
Come on.
673
00:34:23,495 --> 00:34:26,432
Be quiet! He mustn't
know you're here.
674
00:34:30,936 --> 00:34:33,139
( Indistinct chatter )
675
00:34:33,172 --> 00:34:35,274
Hey, professor!
676
00:34:42,948 --> 00:34:44,916
Hey, professor!
Michael?
677
00:34:44,950 --> 00:34:49,087
Run down to the store.
I'm out of, uh, milk.
678
00:34:49,121 --> 00:34:51,690
Milk?
Yeah, milk! Milk!
679
00:34:51,723 --> 00:34:55,361
Yeah, get me, uh,
a couple of quarts!
680
00:34:55,394 --> 00:34:58,497
You know,
those big quarts--
the large size.
681
00:34:58,530 --> 00:35:00,899
Hope you know
what you're doing.
682
00:35:00,932 --> 00:35:02,934
Oh, dear.
683
00:35:02,968 --> 00:35:05,637
Please get dressed
and go before
he comes back.
684
00:35:05,671 --> 00:35:07,506
Who is that jerk,
anyway?
685
00:35:07,539 --> 00:35:09,608
Hmm, jerk?
He's a very nice fellow.
686
00:35:09,641 --> 00:35:11,177
He's temporarily
out of funds.
687
00:35:11,210 --> 00:35:12,544
He lives in the trailer
in the front.
688
00:35:12,578 --> 00:35:13,912
He was here when
I rented the place.
689
00:35:13,945 --> 00:35:15,881
A boarder, eh?
690
00:35:15,914 --> 00:35:18,016
I like him,
and he respects me.
691
00:35:18,049 --> 00:35:19,418
You're kidding.
692
00:35:19,451 --> 00:35:21,420
Well, i--
I have no intention
693
00:35:21,453 --> 00:35:23,855
of disillusioning him,
so please go.
694
00:35:23,889 --> 00:35:25,591
I didn't know how
you liked your eggs,
695
00:35:25,624 --> 00:35:28,126
so I made you
three one-minute eggs,
696
00:35:28,160 --> 00:35:29,861
two two-minute eggs,
697
00:35:29,895 --> 00:35:31,697
and one
three-minute egg.
698
00:35:31,730 --> 00:35:34,933
And fried, scrambled
and poached!
699
00:35:34,966 --> 00:35:36,468
What'll it be, teach?
700
00:35:36,502 --> 00:35:39,171
No, no, thanks.
I'm too nervous to eat.
701
00:35:39,205 --> 00:35:40,706
I'm gonna get awful
fat living here.
702
00:35:40,739 --> 00:35:42,073
Living here?
703
00:35:42,107 --> 00:35:43,342
Well, I slept here.
704
00:35:43,375 --> 00:35:44,576
I slept out there!
705
00:35:44,610 --> 00:35:46,745
Who's gonna
believe you?!
706
00:35:46,778 --> 00:35:48,914
Listen, this is
a good hideout, ace,
707
00:35:48,947 --> 00:35:51,650
and I'm shacking up
till the heat's over!
708
00:35:51,683 --> 00:35:53,852
So relax,
brucie baby!
709
00:35:53,885 --> 00:35:57,756
That sweet, adorable
child of yours.
710
00:35:57,789 --> 00:36:00,892
Any man would be happy
to be her father.
711
00:36:00,926 --> 00:36:03,195
What's wrong with him?
712
00:36:03,229 --> 00:36:05,397
There's nothing
wrong with Bruce.
713
00:36:05,431 --> 00:36:08,234
It's all my fault.
714
00:36:08,267 --> 00:36:11,069
See, I just...
715
00:36:11,102 --> 00:36:13,839
Didn't get around
to telling him that
I'd already been married,
716
00:36:13,872 --> 00:36:16,408
so it was pretty
hard to bring up
a 17-year-old daughter.
717
00:36:18,043 --> 00:36:19,211
An archeologist.
718
00:36:19,245 --> 00:36:20,546
Mm.
719
00:36:22,681 --> 00:36:24,750
Where'd you meet him,
in a cave?
720
00:36:24,783 --> 00:36:26,952
Not really.
I rented him
my beach house.
721
00:36:29,455 --> 00:36:31,423
And where was Libby?
722
00:36:33,191 --> 00:36:34,926
Away at school.
723
00:36:34,960 --> 00:36:37,095
Well, you must
tell him about Libby.
724
00:36:37,128 --> 00:36:39,531
Oh, I intend to.
725
00:36:41,500 --> 00:36:44,102
Of course, it may
scare him away.
726
00:36:44,135 --> 00:36:45,904
I may lose him.
727
00:36:45,937 --> 00:36:47,839
**
728
00:36:54,513 --> 00:36:56,415
( Engine revving )
729
00:37:08,860 --> 00:37:10,429
( Tires screech )
730
00:37:15,834 --> 00:37:17,703
( Humming )
731
00:37:19,971 --> 00:37:23,108
( Ringing )
732
00:37:23,141 --> 00:37:25,344
Yeah, hello there?
733
00:37:25,377 --> 00:37:28,314
Oh, it's you, junior.
734
00:37:28,347 --> 00:37:31,082
Well, junior would
just like to tell Gladys
735
00:37:31,116 --> 00:37:34,019
that she forgot something
in the englishman's
bedroom last night.
736
00:37:34,052 --> 00:37:37,789
What are you--
what are you
talking about?
737
00:37:37,823 --> 00:37:40,726
Then the cop was right--
you were in his bedroom
last night.
738
00:37:40,759 --> 00:37:43,529
All right. Suppose
the cop was right.
739
00:37:43,562 --> 00:37:45,631
You don't own me,
junior.
740
00:37:45,664 --> 00:37:47,999
That's all I wanted
to know.
741
00:37:48,033 --> 00:37:49,468
( Click )
Ohh!
742
00:37:53,705 --> 00:37:55,841
Heh.
743
00:37:55,874 --> 00:37:58,344
( Humming )
744
00:38:02,080 --> 00:38:03,515
Whoops!
745
00:38:05,351 --> 00:38:08,654
( Shivering )
Mmmmm!
746
00:38:08,687 --> 00:38:10,021
Ooh.
747
00:38:12,424 --> 00:38:14,393
( Humming )
748
00:38:22,868 --> 00:38:24,903
Hiya, ace!
749
00:38:24,936 --> 00:38:28,340
I say--i would like
some privacy while
I'm dressing.
750
00:38:28,374 --> 00:38:30,709
I knew you were dressed.
I already peeked
through the keyhole.
751
00:38:30,742 --> 00:38:33,812
Ah, they're still wet.
Never get drip-dry.
752
00:38:33,845 --> 00:38:35,213
Do you mean
to tell me that you
left those things
753
00:38:35,246 --> 00:38:36,615
in full view
of everyone?
754
00:38:36,648 --> 00:38:39,284
Yeah!
Oh, what's the use?
755
00:38:39,317 --> 00:38:41,086
Hey, where you goin'?
756
00:38:41,119 --> 00:38:43,389
Miss Smith, I cannot
forcibly evict you,
757
00:38:43,422 --> 00:38:45,824
because doubtless
you would accuse me
of manhandling you.
758
00:38:45,857 --> 00:38:47,493
Yeah, I figured it
pretty good.
759
00:38:47,526 --> 00:38:49,294
The papers are full
of lecherous men
760
00:38:49,327 --> 00:38:50,962
and innocent
little girls.
761
00:38:50,996 --> 00:38:54,232
Precisely.
In the language
of your world,
762
00:38:54,265 --> 00:38:56,635
I'm up the
diabolical creek.
763
00:38:56,668 --> 00:38:59,471
Hey, now, wait--
it ain't that bad.
764
00:38:59,505 --> 00:39:01,373
I tell you
what I'll do--
765
00:39:01,407 --> 00:39:03,008
if it gets too
dew-droppy out there,
766
00:39:03,041 --> 00:39:04,910
I'll give you my bed,
and take the couch, okay?
767
00:39:04,943 --> 00:39:07,245
I'll tell you
what I'll do.
768
00:39:07,278 --> 00:39:09,080
Miss Smith, you can
have the whole place
to yourself.
769
00:39:11,450 --> 00:39:13,619
What do you mean, eh?
770
00:39:13,652 --> 00:39:15,454
I mean that i'm
going to an hotel
771
00:39:15,487 --> 00:39:16,822
where I shall have proof
772
00:39:16,855 --> 00:39:19,357
that I have not been
consorting with you.
773
00:39:19,391 --> 00:39:21,693
Good day, miss Smith.
774
00:39:25,431 --> 00:39:28,434
Oh, boy, did I
underestimate you!
775
00:39:28,467 --> 00:39:30,536
You and your
sanctimonious yak-yak
about love and marriage,
776
00:39:30,569 --> 00:39:32,804
and all this time
you're playing around
with my Gladys!
777
00:39:32,838 --> 00:39:35,240
Gladys? Michael,
don't be so absurd.
778
00:39:35,273 --> 00:39:36,475
Absurd, huh?
All right.
779
00:39:36,508 --> 00:39:38,577
Blighty,
explain these.
780
00:39:56,428 --> 00:39:58,697
Exhibit a.
Exhibit b.
781
00:39:58,730 --> 00:40:01,132
These, your honor,
are the property
782
00:40:01,166 --> 00:40:02,901
of one Gladys schmidlapp.
783
00:40:02,934 --> 00:40:05,571
The prosecution
rests its case.
784
00:40:05,604 --> 00:40:08,406
Here, look,
Michael.
785
00:40:08,440 --> 00:40:11,409
Your honor, may I suggest
786
00:40:11,443 --> 00:40:13,512
that the prosecutor
gets himself glasses?
787
00:40:13,545 --> 00:40:15,246
For heaven's sake,
Michael.
788
00:40:15,280 --> 00:40:16,982
Gladys couldn't get
into that.
789
00:40:17,015 --> 00:40:18,650
And is this Gladys'?
790
00:40:25,356 --> 00:40:27,358
Uh...
791
00:40:27,392 --> 00:40:29,160
Couldn't be Gladys'.
792
00:40:29,194 --> 00:40:32,163
It, uh--
it's padded, too.
793
00:40:32,197 --> 00:40:34,500
Where do you get off?!
794
00:40:34,533 --> 00:40:36,602
The nerve!
795
00:40:36,635 --> 00:40:38,136
Padded! Little dab
of cotton,
796
00:40:38,169 --> 00:40:39,705
and you call it padded.
797
00:40:39,738 --> 00:40:41,206
Who's the small one
with the big mouth?
798
00:40:41,239 --> 00:40:42,608
Michael, I know
you're not going
to believe this,
799
00:40:42,641 --> 00:40:44,342
but I don't know
who she is.
800
00:40:44,375 --> 00:40:45,811
She broke in here
last night.
801
00:40:45,844 --> 00:40:47,713
She slept in my bed
last night,
802
00:40:47,746 --> 00:40:49,347
without my permission,
of course.
803
00:40:49,380 --> 00:40:52,183
She says she escaped
from a reformatory
for delinquents,
804
00:40:52,217 --> 00:40:53,785
where they beat her,
805
00:40:53,819 --> 00:40:55,453
and she's got
the black and blue
marks to prove it.
806
00:40:55,487 --> 00:40:57,723
Look, miss Smith,
please--
807
00:40:57,756 --> 00:40:59,457
this is the name
she gave--
808
00:40:59,491 --> 00:41:00,458
miss Smith,
for the last time,
809
00:41:00,492 --> 00:41:02,027
in front
of a witness,
810
00:41:02,060 --> 00:41:03,962
will you please
put on your clothes
and go?
811
00:41:03,995 --> 00:41:06,565
With a damp bra?
You want me to get
a chest cold or something?
812
00:41:06,598 --> 00:41:08,500
Or pneumonia.
Maybe even double pneumonia.
813
00:41:08,534 --> 00:41:09,868
Funny.
Good-bye, Michael.
814
00:41:09,901 --> 00:41:11,436
I'm going
to an hotel.
815
00:41:11,469 --> 00:41:12,738
Just a minute! Hey!
816
00:41:12,771 --> 00:41:14,072
Who do you think
you're groping?
817
00:41:14,105 --> 00:41:15,674
I intend to find out--
I'm his lawyer.
818
00:41:15,707 --> 00:41:17,475
You, a lawyer? A!
819
00:41:17,509 --> 00:41:19,578
Quite right.
Michael is studying law.
820
00:41:19,611 --> 00:41:20,579
You're my first client?
821
00:41:21,880 --> 00:41:23,549
Now...
822
00:41:23,582 --> 00:41:24,950
What's your name?
823
00:41:24,983 --> 00:41:27,418
Why don't you go
get another drink?
824
00:41:27,452 --> 00:41:28,820
You're nutty.
825
00:41:31,056 --> 00:41:32,423
Hey, small stuff,
826
00:41:32,457 --> 00:41:33,925
you're alone here
with two grown men.
827
00:41:33,959 --> 00:41:36,895
Anything can happen,
so answer the question.
828
00:41:36,928 --> 00:41:38,597
All right.
All right.
829
00:41:40,165 --> 00:41:42,834
All right.
What's your name?
Libby Smith.
830
00:41:42,868 --> 00:41:44,069
What'd you get
sent up for?
Stealing.
831
00:41:44,102 --> 00:41:45,671
And they beat you?
I got the bruises.
832
00:41:45,704 --> 00:41:47,372
I'd like to see 'em.
Michael!
833
00:41:47,405 --> 00:41:49,240
Well, as your lawyer,
834
00:41:49,274 --> 00:41:50,842
I feel I should be able
to view the evidence.
835
00:41:50,876 --> 00:41:52,343
However, if you don't
want to see her bruises--
836
00:41:52,377 --> 00:41:53,579
I do not.
837
00:41:55,714 --> 00:41:56,948
All right, so you got
sent up for stealing.
838
00:41:56,982 --> 00:41:58,516
For stealing what?
We stole cars.
839
00:41:58,550 --> 00:41:59,851
Who's "we"?
The gang.
840
00:41:59,885 --> 00:42:01,519
How'd you get
into the gang?
I met a guy!
841
00:42:01,553 --> 00:42:03,589
And then what?
He introduced me to
the rest of the gang.
842
00:42:03,622 --> 00:42:05,724
And you started stealing?
We call it "borrowing."
843
00:42:05,757 --> 00:42:07,292
And then you started
ducking the police?
Yeah.
844
00:42:07,325 --> 00:42:09,628
And the professor here--
he's your patsy?
Yeah.
845
00:42:09,661 --> 00:42:12,130
And if he throws you out,
you'll open your big mouth
and say you spent the night.
846
00:42:12,163 --> 00:42:13,498
That's it, Clarence.
847
00:42:13,531 --> 00:42:14,365
Professor,
unpack your bags.
848
00:42:14,399 --> 00:42:15,567
You're not going anywhere.
849
00:42:15,601 --> 00:42:18,136
Clarence--
I mean, Michael--
850
00:42:18,169 --> 00:42:20,706
for one moment, I thought
you had the makings--
851
00:42:20,739 --> 00:42:22,540
professor, I said
to unpack your bags.
852
00:42:22,574 --> 00:42:24,275
Now, miss, uh--
Smith.
853
00:42:24,309 --> 00:42:26,878
Yeah, Smith.
You couldn't have
spent the night here.
854
00:42:26,912 --> 00:42:28,880
Prove it.
I can, because I
didn't see you here.
855
00:42:28,914 --> 00:42:31,149
How could you see me
when I was in his bed?
856
00:42:31,182 --> 00:42:32,951
Because I was
in bed with him.
857
00:42:32,984 --> 00:42:34,753
You--
858
00:42:34,786 --> 00:42:35,854
the professor was having
one of his nightmares.
859
00:42:35,887 --> 00:42:37,488
I was here
giving him hot milk.
860
00:42:37,522 --> 00:42:40,091
So you couldn't have
been alone with him.
861
00:42:40,125 --> 00:42:42,227
I am his witness.
862
00:42:42,260 --> 00:42:45,296
That's a lyin' lie!
863
00:42:45,330 --> 00:42:47,699
Now you prove it.
864
00:42:47,733 --> 00:42:49,534
Well, I got a witness
says...
865
00:42:49,567 --> 00:42:51,770
Your girl Gladys--
866
00:42:51,803 --> 00:42:54,105
she was under his bed
last night!
867
00:42:54,139 --> 00:42:56,708
Gladys?
Under a bed?
868
00:42:56,742 --> 00:42:58,276
( Both laughing )
869
00:42:58,309 --> 00:43:00,578
Oh, ridiculous.
870
00:43:00,612 --> 00:43:03,214
No, no, you're not
gonna cause trouble
between US allies.
871
00:43:03,248 --> 00:43:04,850
Mm, that's right--
US allies.
Yes.
872
00:43:04,883 --> 00:43:07,786
Good-bye, Libby Smith.
873
00:43:12,624 --> 00:43:15,661
Well, professor,
you'd better
pop off to class.
874
00:43:15,694 --> 00:43:17,028
You're gonna
be late, you know.
875
00:43:17,062 --> 00:43:19,597
I'll stay here,
wait till she goes,
876
00:43:19,631 --> 00:43:21,366
lock up and all that.
877
00:43:21,399 --> 00:43:23,268
Thank you, Michael.
You know, you really
do have the makings
878
00:43:23,301 --> 00:43:24,836
of a very good barrister.
879
00:43:29,207 --> 00:43:32,143
With me gone,
who'll be your witness?
880
00:43:32,177 --> 00:43:35,280
Oh, professor!
881
00:43:35,313 --> 00:43:38,216
She's...just a kid.
882
00:43:38,249 --> 00:43:40,719
Exactly. I'll drop you off
at your class.
883
00:43:40,752 --> 00:43:43,354
Oh, but--but--
884
00:43:44,856 --> 00:43:47,325
oh, good morning,
professor Patterson.
885
00:43:47,358 --> 00:43:48,960
Professor bowman.
886
00:43:48,994 --> 00:43:51,196
A neighbor of mine--
Michael pulaski.
887
00:43:51,229 --> 00:43:54,833
Oh, how do you do, sir?
Hello.
888
00:43:54,866 --> 00:43:56,868
Well, how did you sleep
last night, professor?
889
00:43:56,902 --> 00:43:58,837
Fine.
Fine?
890
00:43:58,870 --> 00:44:00,839
I thought you might've
been up all night,
891
00:44:00,872 --> 00:44:03,341
looking for the rest
of your dinosaur.
892
00:44:03,374 --> 00:44:05,210
( Laughs )
Hardly.
893
00:44:05,243 --> 00:44:06,377
It's like--oh!
894
00:44:06,411 --> 00:44:08,046
Nice to meet you,
pulaski.
895
00:44:08,079 --> 00:44:10,281
I'll be seeing you
again, professor.
896
00:44:10,315 --> 00:44:11,750
Bye, professor.
897
00:44:14,352 --> 00:44:15,854
Got it!
Got what?
898
00:44:15,887 --> 00:44:17,655
You and bowman are after
the same thing, right?
899
00:44:17,689 --> 00:44:19,424
The university Grant?
Yes.
900
00:44:19,457 --> 00:44:20,726
And if you get in trouble,
then he's got the Grant
for sure.
901
00:44:20,759 --> 00:44:22,260
Trouble?
902
00:44:22,293 --> 00:44:24,229
Yeah, sort of
like a scandal.
Like a teenager.
903
00:44:24,262 --> 00:44:26,231
Oh, but, Michael,
the professor and I
904
00:44:26,264 --> 00:44:27,866
are in friendly
competition.
905
00:44:27,899 --> 00:44:29,868
Just remember--
that kid is in your house
906
00:44:29,901 --> 00:44:31,069
with that old bone that
he's so interested in.
907
00:44:31,102 --> 00:44:33,104
I flatly refuse
to believe this.
908
00:44:33,138 --> 00:44:34,873
Why did she go there?
Why did she pick your place?
909
00:44:34,906 --> 00:44:36,107
Why does she want to
stay there? Ow, think.
910
00:44:36,141 --> 00:44:38,343
Mm-hmm.
911
00:44:38,376 --> 00:44:41,479
He did press rather
a lot of martinis
on me last night.
912
00:44:41,512 --> 00:44:43,214
Aha! See?
913
00:44:43,248 --> 00:44:44,883
Now, if you'd
come home stiff
and found that kid there,
914
00:44:44,916 --> 00:44:47,352
who knows?
You're English,
but you're human.
915
00:44:47,385 --> 00:44:49,087
Thank you.
916
00:44:49,120 --> 00:44:51,122
Michael, will you
do me a favor?
917
00:44:51,156 --> 00:44:54,425
Will you drive
straight back home?
918
00:44:54,459 --> 00:44:56,327
Here's the key
to the door.
919
00:45:05,270 --> 00:45:06,471
Libby?
920
00:45:14,279 --> 00:45:15,814
Libby?
921
00:45:17,615 --> 00:45:20,151
( Dog barks four times)
922
00:45:20,185 --> 00:45:23,354
Four barks? A ha!
Gotta be jayne Mansfield.
923
00:45:28,593 --> 00:45:30,628
All right, Jess,
where is she?
924
00:45:30,661 --> 00:45:33,098
( Barking )
925
00:45:34,565 --> 00:45:36,201
Libby!
926
00:45:42,140 --> 00:45:44,009
Libby!
927
00:45:44,042 --> 00:45:46,377
Boy, am I glad
you're still here.
I thought you'd gone.
928
00:45:46,411 --> 00:45:48,046
I am gone.
I'm out of the house.
929
00:45:48,079 --> 00:45:49,747
You lied
to get me out, too.
930
00:45:49,781 --> 00:45:51,082
But I had to.
The professor's my buddy.
931
00:45:51,116 --> 00:45:52,918
But don't you worry--
no, I won't worry.
932
00:45:52,951 --> 00:45:54,986
But listen--i talked him
out of putting you out.
933
00:45:55,020 --> 00:45:56,922
You can stay, see?
934
00:45:56,955 --> 00:45:58,456
Yeah, why'd you
do that?
935
00:45:58,489 --> 00:45:59,958
Because, honey,
you're a--
936
00:45:59,991 --> 00:46:01,526
the name's Libby.
Sorry. Freudian slip.
937
00:46:01,559 --> 00:46:02,660
Now, come on.
Sit down.
938
00:46:02,693 --> 00:46:03,728
Come on, come on,
sit down.
939
00:46:03,761 --> 00:46:05,496
Look, please, please--
940
00:46:05,530 --> 00:46:08,366
now, I'll tell you why.
941
00:46:08,399 --> 00:46:10,301
You escaped from
a reformatory, right?
942
00:46:10,335 --> 00:46:12,037
Yeah, right.
943
00:46:12,070 --> 00:46:14,372
Well, if you are
innocent,
944
00:46:14,405 --> 00:46:15,907
you'll have to go back,
945
00:46:15,941 --> 00:46:19,010
and, uh,
if I could prove
946
00:46:19,044 --> 00:46:20,711
that, um, they beat you,
947
00:46:20,745 --> 00:46:23,815
then, uh...We'd have
ourselves a case.
948
00:46:23,849 --> 00:46:26,251
Wouldn't we?
Simple as that.
949
00:46:26,284 --> 00:46:30,488
Well, if you did
keep me out of jail,
950
00:46:30,521 --> 00:46:32,657
I don't know how
I'd ever repay you.
951
00:46:32,690 --> 00:46:36,227
Ohh! Even if
you were rich,
952
00:46:36,261 --> 00:46:37,762
I wouldn't take
any of your money.
953
00:46:37,795 --> 00:46:39,865
No?
No, no.
954
00:46:39,898 --> 00:46:42,067
Well,
I'm just a kid.
955
00:46:42,100 --> 00:46:43,134
Yeah.
956
00:46:46,838 --> 00:46:49,240
Well, all I could
give you is...
957
00:46:49,274 --> 00:46:52,377
Some...
Childish thing,
958
00:46:52,410 --> 00:46:54,045
like--like--
959
00:47:10,828 --> 00:47:12,730
Did he molest you,
child?
960
00:47:12,763 --> 00:47:15,066
Not him. He's got
a terrible overbite.
961
00:47:15,100 --> 00:47:17,068
Huh? That's a relief.
962
00:47:24,775 --> 00:47:27,478
Once more. Let's be
childish again.
963
00:47:27,512 --> 00:47:30,015
You are.
964
00:47:30,048 --> 00:47:31,582
So was I childish
to listen to you,
965
00:47:31,616 --> 00:47:33,284
to think that Dr. Bowman--
a scientist and gentleman--
966
00:47:33,318 --> 00:47:35,753
would behave
with such foolishness.
967
00:47:35,786 --> 00:47:37,255
Luckily, I just
arrived in time
968
00:47:37,288 --> 00:47:38,990
before you could
harm that child.
969
00:47:39,024 --> 00:47:40,391
Child?
That's no child.
970
00:47:40,425 --> 00:47:42,460
That's a
40-year-old dwarf.
971
00:47:42,493 --> 00:47:44,295
It takes time to learn
how to kiss like that.
972
00:47:44,329 --> 00:47:46,031
I can't throw you
off the property.
973
00:47:46,064 --> 00:47:47,432
Helen gave you
a parking space
974
00:47:47,465 --> 00:47:49,901
for that mobile
sex wagon of yours.
975
00:47:49,935 --> 00:47:51,970
She also gave you free
electricity and water,
976
00:47:52,003 --> 00:47:54,940
in exchange for which
you were supposed to
have done the chores.
977
00:47:54,973 --> 00:47:58,043
I've tried to emulate
Helen's generosity
by being kind to you,
978
00:47:58,076 --> 00:47:59,310
but in future,
stay out of my house,
979
00:47:59,344 --> 00:48:01,346
out of my bar
and out of my way!
980
00:48:08,419 --> 00:48:10,355
**
981
00:48:43,888 --> 00:48:47,392
So I stole cars.
I was the jag expert.
982
00:48:47,425 --> 00:48:49,194
You know, those jags
get a lot of loot
983
00:48:49,227 --> 00:48:50,628
from the used car
dealers.
984
00:48:50,661 --> 00:48:52,130
Oh?
Mm-hmm.
985
00:48:54,299 --> 00:48:55,600
You know Sam beezlebub?
986
00:48:55,633 --> 00:48:58,136
Beezlebub?
987
00:48:58,169 --> 00:49:00,638
Yeah, the grinning irishman.
He advertises on TV.
988
00:49:00,671 --> 00:49:03,741
Oh, no. I've only been
here for five months,
989
00:49:03,774 --> 00:49:06,511
so I haven't got round
to your better programs.
990
00:49:06,544 --> 00:49:08,546
Oh, that's too bad.
991
00:49:08,579 --> 00:49:12,017
Beezlebub bought
all the cars
that I stole.
992
00:49:12,050 --> 00:49:13,784
( Clatter )
993
00:49:13,818 --> 00:49:15,520
Ah, here he comes--
994
00:49:15,553 --> 00:49:17,655
the law student
in for his toddy.
995
00:49:17,688 --> 00:49:19,224
Not anymore.
996
00:49:19,257 --> 00:49:21,059
What do you want,
Michael?
997
00:49:21,092 --> 00:49:22,994
I've come to--
998
00:49:23,028 --> 00:49:25,030
the bar's over there,
bannister.
999
00:49:25,063 --> 00:49:26,564
Barrister.
1000
00:49:26,597 --> 00:49:29,267
All right, big deal.
So you can spell.
1001
00:49:29,300 --> 00:49:30,735
You're a lousy
kisser, though.
1002
00:49:34,939 --> 00:49:37,175
What is it, Michael?
1003
00:49:39,444 --> 00:49:41,479
One thing you said
before is right--
1004
00:49:43,448 --> 00:49:45,050
I did promise Helen
I'd do the chores
1005
00:49:45,083 --> 00:49:46,717
in exchange for
a free parking space.
1006
00:49:46,751 --> 00:49:48,553
You mind if I begin?
1007
00:49:48,586 --> 00:49:51,556
Well, Helen meant,
uh, raking the leaves
1008
00:49:51,589 --> 00:49:54,392
and shooing
the caterpillars
out of the garden.
1009
00:49:54,425 --> 00:49:57,628
You know perfectly well
Mrs. O'Connor does
the housework.
1010
00:49:57,662 --> 00:50:00,398
I know, but i'm
emotionally insecure,
going all out.
1011
00:50:00,431 --> 00:50:02,167
Libby and I are
also going out.
1012
00:50:02,200 --> 00:50:03,368
Going out where?
1013
00:50:03,401 --> 00:50:05,036
You'll see.
1014
00:50:05,070 --> 00:50:08,106
All right, well,
I'm gonna get dressed.
1015
00:50:10,375 --> 00:50:11,509
Mike: Come on, Jess.
1016
00:50:15,746 --> 00:50:17,982
That's a girl.
1017
00:50:18,015 --> 00:50:21,719
Michael, i--I'm sorry
I lost control
of myself today.
1018
00:50:21,752 --> 00:50:23,788
It's okay, professor.
1019
00:50:23,821 --> 00:50:26,491
I really am sorry.
It was most
unbecoming of me.
1020
00:50:28,393 --> 00:50:30,561
When I, uh...
Finish with the floors,
1021
00:50:30,595 --> 00:50:32,597
you want me to turn
her bed down?
1022
00:50:32,630 --> 00:50:36,234
Hmm? Oh, uh, no, no.
She's not coming back.
1023
00:50:38,636 --> 00:50:40,971
I'm taking her out
for a bite to eat
1024
00:50:41,005 --> 00:50:43,108
and then to the
sheriff's station.
1025
00:50:49,747 --> 00:50:51,349
There's nothing
like a nutburger
1026
00:50:51,382 --> 00:50:53,451
with chili sauce
on it.
1027
00:50:53,484 --> 00:50:55,286
No, there isn't,
is there?
1028
00:50:55,320 --> 00:50:57,755
Glad you're
enjoying it.
1029
00:50:57,788 --> 00:50:59,790
I like being with you.
1030
00:50:59,824 --> 00:51:02,693
I--i enjoy
your company.
1031
00:51:05,863 --> 00:51:08,433
Hey, this is
a crazy car.
1032
00:51:08,466 --> 00:51:10,601
I feel like
I'm driving
with no hands.
1033
00:51:10,635 --> 00:51:13,804
( Chuckles )
1034
00:51:13,838 --> 00:51:17,408
I'm beginning to see
why that woman you're
marrying went for you.
1035
00:51:17,442 --> 00:51:18,976
I don't know why she did,
1036
00:51:19,009 --> 00:51:21,446
but I'm certainly
glad she did.
1037
00:51:23,314 --> 00:51:25,350
Where are we going?
1038
00:51:25,383 --> 00:51:27,452
We'll be there
any minute.
1039
00:51:27,485 --> 00:51:28,753
Dancing!
1040
00:51:28,786 --> 00:51:32,056
Uh...not exactly, no.
1041
00:51:32,089 --> 00:51:35,193
Mmm. I love surprises.
1042
00:51:35,226 --> 00:51:37,195
( Laughs )
1043
00:51:44,302 --> 00:51:46,171
Sheriff's station?
Mm-hmm.
1044
00:51:54,011 --> 00:51:56,147
You want me to go in there?
1045
00:51:56,181 --> 00:51:57,582
You must.
1046
00:52:00,151 --> 00:52:02,987
Well, it--it was
a good nutburger
1047
00:52:03,020 --> 00:52:04,889
with chili sauce on it.
1048
00:52:07,725 --> 00:52:10,828
I thought you enjoyed
my company.
1049
00:52:10,861 --> 00:52:13,598
Please don't make it
more difficult.
1050
00:52:15,766 --> 00:52:17,568
Don't worry,
I won't involve you.
1051
00:52:17,602 --> 00:52:18,969
Of course you won't.
You're far too--
1052
00:52:19,003 --> 00:52:20,371
may I kiss you?
1053
00:52:25,843 --> 00:52:27,478
Daddy.
1054
00:52:43,861 --> 00:52:45,496
Yes, miss?
1055
00:52:45,530 --> 00:52:49,267
Do you know when
the next bus leaves
for Berkeley?
1056
00:52:49,300 --> 00:52:50,668
In about an hour.
1057
00:52:52,403 --> 00:52:53,938
Is there anything wrong?
1058
00:53:04,315 --> 00:53:07,285
Libby! Come here!
1059
00:53:10,621 --> 00:53:12,257
Come on.
1060
00:53:12,290 --> 00:53:14,492
What are you doing here?
1061
00:53:14,525 --> 00:53:16,494
I knew you wouldn't
turn yourself in.
Yeah?
1062
00:53:16,527 --> 00:53:17,662
I hate to see a kid
out in the cold
1063
00:53:17,695 --> 00:53:19,096
when I got a nice,
warm trailer.
1064
00:53:19,129 --> 00:53:20,565
You think I'm 15
or something?
1065
00:53:20,598 --> 00:53:22,066
No. And it kills me
to say this,
1066
00:53:22,099 --> 00:53:23,701
but I promise--
no passes.
1067
00:53:23,734 --> 00:53:25,303
And the professor--
he won't know
you're there.
1068
00:53:25,336 --> 00:53:26,937
Where would you sleep?
1069
00:53:26,971 --> 00:53:28,205
I'll take Jess' bed.
1070
00:53:28,239 --> 00:53:30,475
Oh, come on.
Honest.
1071
00:53:30,508 --> 00:53:32,877
Why would you want
to do it?
1072
00:53:32,910 --> 00:53:34,312
Because I'm a crazy,
mixed-up kid.
1073
00:53:34,345 --> 00:53:35,946
True.
True.
1074
00:53:35,980 --> 00:53:37,315
Besides, Jess barked
at you four times.
1075
00:53:37,348 --> 00:53:39,083
What does that mean?
1076
00:53:39,116 --> 00:53:40,818
She may never
do it again.
1077
00:53:40,851 --> 00:53:42,853
I want to be sure.
1078
00:54:07,478 --> 00:54:09,179
Libby:Echoing
you said you enjoyed
my company.
1079
00:54:09,213 --> 00:54:11,416
I do, I do.
1080
00:54:11,449 --> 00:54:12,950
You said you enjoyed
my company.
1081
00:54:12,983 --> 00:54:15,286
I do, I do.
1082
00:54:15,320 --> 00:54:17,288
You said you enjoyed
my company!
1083
00:54:17,322 --> 00:54:19,023
I do, I do.
1084
00:54:19,056 --> 00:54:20,925
You said you enjoyed
my company!
1085
00:54:20,958 --> 00:54:23,428
I do, I do.
1086
00:54:23,461 --> 00:54:26,063
Then why'd you
send me back?
1087
00:54:26,096 --> 00:54:28,198
You could've made
an honest woman
out of me!
1088
00:54:28,232 --> 00:54:29,534
I had to.
1089
00:54:29,567 --> 00:54:32,136
They beat me here!
1090
00:54:32,169 --> 00:54:35,205
Oh! Oh! Oh!
Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!
1091
00:54:35,239 --> 00:54:40,277
(Screaming)
1092
00:54:40,311 --> 00:54:42,313
Did they hurt you,
Libby?
1093
00:54:42,347 --> 00:54:44,582
Nah, I wore
my rubber girdle.
Hmm?
1094
00:54:44,615 --> 00:54:47,718
I wore
my rubber girdle!
1095
00:54:47,752 --> 00:54:50,388
Oh, good show.
1096
00:54:50,421 --> 00:54:52,490
( Chuckling )
1097
00:54:52,523 --> 00:54:54,559
I'm gonna get
out of here!
1098
00:54:54,592 --> 00:54:58,295
Hmm? O, no.
You mustn't, you mustn't.
1099
00:54:58,329 --> 00:55:00,898
I'm out already!
1100
00:55:00,931 --> 00:55:03,701
I'm not only gonna
steal jaguars,
1101
00:55:03,734 --> 00:55:06,704
I'm gonna kill
all jag drivers!
1102
00:55:06,737 --> 00:55:09,073
No, Libby, you mustn't!
You mustn't!
1103
00:55:09,106 --> 00:55:10,541
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Now, get out.
1104
00:55:10,575 --> 00:55:13,143
No, no. Libby!
1105
00:55:13,177 --> 00:55:16,080
Okay, blubber.
If it hadn't been
for "legs",
1106
00:55:16,113 --> 00:55:18,048
you might've
lived longer.
1107
00:55:18,082 --> 00:55:21,051
I say...
Don't kill blubber.
1108
00:55:23,788 --> 00:55:27,057
Libby! Don't kill
Mr. Blubber!
1109
00:55:27,091 --> 00:55:30,227
Libby!
Don't kill blubber!
1110
00:55:30,260 --> 00:55:31,562
Libby!
1111
00:55:33,197 --> 00:55:34,899
Libby! Libby!
1112
00:55:34,932 --> 00:55:36,701
Don't kill blubber!
1113
00:55:36,734 --> 00:55:38,769
Libby,
put that gun down!
1114
00:55:38,803 --> 00:55:40,871
No, stop!
1115
00:55:40,905 --> 00:55:42,873
Libby!
Don't shoot blubber!
1116
00:55:42,907 --> 00:55:45,275
Bullets hurt!
Don't shoot blubber!
1117
00:55:45,309 --> 00:55:47,011
Libby!
1118
00:55:47,044 --> 00:55:49,146
Libby...
1119
00:55:49,179 --> 00:55:51,148
Libby...
1120
00:55:51,181 --> 00:55:53,250
Hey.
I'm...
1121
00:55:53,283 --> 00:55:55,520
Sorry I took
you back to
the reformatory.
1122
00:55:55,553 --> 00:55:57,822
Honest?
Mm, I'm very sorry.
1123
00:55:57,855 --> 00:55:59,657
Well, that's all right,
'cause I didn't go.
1124
00:55:59,690 --> 00:56:03,293
I'm still here.
Hey, teach? Hey!
1125
00:56:03,327 --> 00:56:07,297
You didn't shoot that
lovely Mr. Blubber,
did you?
1126
00:56:07,331 --> 00:56:08,866
What?
1127
00:56:11,301 --> 00:56:13,538
You--you escaped
with your--
1128
00:56:13,571 --> 00:56:16,173
with your, um,
rubber girdle.
1129
00:56:16,206 --> 00:56:18,409
Girdle?
1130
00:56:18,443 --> 00:56:20,110
Hey, you must've had
a bad dream.
1131
00:56:21,712 --> 00:56:23,481
What are you
doing here?
1132
00:56:23,514 --> 00:56:25,450
You were screamin'.
1133
00:56:25,483 --> 00:56:27,685
Hmm? Here were you?
1134
00:56:27,718 --> 00:56:29,820
I was out sleeping
in Mike's trailer.
1135
00:56:29,854 --> 00:56:31,422
Oh. Hmm?
1136
00:56:31,456 --> 00:56:33,157
You sure were
screaming, professor.
Yeah.
1137
00:56:33,190 --> 00:56:36,861
What were you doing
in Michael's trailer?
1138
00:56:36,894 --> 00:56:40,097
Sleeping. But listen,
I don't like his bed.
1139
00:56:40,130 --> 00:56:41,766
It's too lumpy.
1140
00:56:41,799 --> 00:56:43,901
So I think
I'll move back in
and take the couch.
1141
00:56:43,934 --> 00:56:46,671
And if you have
any bad dreams,
1142
00:56:46,704 --> 00:56:48,839
I'll make you
some hot milk.
1143
00:56:48,873 --> 00:56:50,508
All righty?
1144
00:56:50,541 --> 00:56:52,176
Come on, kid.
1145
00:56:53,611 --> 00:56:55,145
Nighty-nighty.
1146
00:57:07,424 --> 00:57:09,026
Monsieur dukoff?
1147
00:57:09,059 --> 00:57:10,495
Just a moment, please.
1148
00:57:13,263 --> 00:57:15,199
Yes?
1149
00:57:15,232 --> 00:57:17,635
We were able to get you
on the next plane
to New York.
1150
00:57:17,668 --> 00:57:18,969
Oh, thank you.
1151
00:57:19,003 --> 00:57:22,707
Flight 729.
It leaves in one hour.
1152
00:57:22,740 --> 00:57:25,643
Thank you.
Thank you very much!
1153
00:57:33,684 --> 00:57:35,953
( Tires screech )
1154
00:57:35,986 --> 00:57:37,421
Guess who?!
1155
00:57:37,454 --> 00:57:38,889
( Laughs )
1156
00:57:38,923 --> 00:57:41,759
Mrs. Roberts...
I'd never have known.
1157
00:57:41,792 --> 00:57:44,662
I won't be Mrs. Roberts
very long.
1158
00:57:44,695 --> 00:57:46,597
My husband and I
have called it a day.
1159
00:57:46,631 --> 00:57:49,066
So my nights are free.
1160
00:57:49,099 --> 00:57:52,036
And Helen's away,
so you nights are free!
1161
00:57:52,069 --> 00:57:54,438
I'm late for class.
( Honks )
1162
00:57:54,471 --> 00:57:55,439
( Gasps )
1163
00:57:55,472 --> 00:57:56,841
Good-bye, Mrs. Roberts.
1164
00:58:01,879 --> 00:58:03,814
Radio announcer:
And this is
dick whittinghill,
1165
00:58:03,848 --> 00:58:05,850
inviting you back
to our first-run
second feature--
1166
00:58:05,883 --> 00:58:07,985
the trial of Mabel Smith.
1167
00:58:08,018 --> 00:58:10,087
Turn around, Jess.
You're gonna
like this.
1168
00:58:14,759 --> 00:58:17,494
Your name?
Mabel Smith.
1169
00:58:17,528 --> 00:58:19,496
And you claim
the reason you
escaped from jail
1170
00:58:19,530 --> 00:58:20,898
was that
you were beaten?
1171
00:58:20,931 --> 00:58:23,033
You want to see
my bruises?
1172
00:58:23,067 --> 00:58:25,002
That won't be
necessary.
1173
00:58:25,035 --> 00:58:26,971
Why were you in jail
in the first place?
1174
00:58:27,004 --> 00:58:29,439
For stealing.
For stealing what?
1175
00:58:29,473 --> 00:58:31,108
We stole cars.
1176
00:58:31,141 --> 00:58:33,177
"We"? Who's "we"?
1177
00:58:33,210 --> 00:58:35,212
The gang.
1178
00:58:35,245 --> 00:58:37,615
How did you get
in the gang?
1179
00:58:37,648 --> 00:58:40,651
I...met a guy.
1180
00:58:40,685 --> 00:58:42,720
He introduced me
to the rest of the gang.
1181
00:58:42,753 --> 00:58:44,822
He introduced me
to the rest of the gang.
1182
00:58:44,855 --> 00:58:46,523
And you started
stealing?
1183
00:58:46,557 --> 00:58:49,059
We called it "borrowing".
1184
00:58:49,093 --> 00:58:51,328
Well, we called it
"borrowing".
1185
00:58:51,361 --> 00:58:54,098
Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
1186
00:58:54,131 --> 00:58:56,300
**
1187
00:59:18,388 --> 00:59:20,157
( Clattering )
1188
00:59:32,937 --> 00:59:35,039
( Clatter continues )
1189
01:00:20,084 --> 01:00:22,252
( Whimpers )
1190
01:01:10,234 --> 01:01:11,035
( Thud )
1191
01:01:43,667 --> 01:01:45,202
( Snoring )
1192
01:02:00,785 --> 01:02:02,686
( Snoring )
1193
01:02:02,719 --> 01:02:05,089
( Whistling )
1194
01:02:25,442 --> 01:02:27,577
Oh, professor...
1195
01:02:27,611 --> 01:02:29,313
What are you doing?
1196
01:02:29,346 --> 01:02:32,282
Changing a tire,
miss Turner.
1197
01:02:32,316 --> 01:02:34,084
Oh, I see.
1198
01:02:34,118 --> 01:02:36,887
And then you're gonna
put on your spare tire.
1199
01:02:36,921 --> 01:02:38,722
That's right,
miss Turner.
1200
01:02:38,755 --> 01:02:41,425
How interesting.
Hardly.
1201
01:02:41,458 --> 01:02:46,196
I mean, it's interesting
that you always carry
two spare tires.
1202
01:02:46,230 --> 01:02:49,599
Miss Turner, I only
carry one spare tire,
1203
01:02:49,633 --> 01:02:51,268
like everybody else.
1204
01:02:51,301 --> 01:02:55,305
Well, then you're
wasting your time,
professor.
1205
01:02:55,339 --> 01:02:57,942
Miss Turner...
1206
01:02:57,975 --> 01:03:00,577
I don't wish
to appear rude,
1207
01:03:00,610 --> 01:03:03,747
but you would
please leave me
and my puncture alone?
1208
01:03:03,780 --> 01:03:05,850
Okay, professor.
1209
01:03:05,883 --> 01:03:09,286
I'll leave you and your
two punctures alone.
1210
01:03:11,121 --> 01:03:13,257
I wonder what
she meant by that.
1211
01:03:24,234 --> 01:03:25,903
Crumbs!
1212
01:03:41,651 --> 01:03:43,287
Miss Turner.
1213
01:03:45,923 --> 01:03:47,557
( Screeching )
1214
01:03:49,559 --> 01:03:50,961
I dig-dig you!
1215
01:03:50,995 --> 01:03:52,429
Miss Turner, keep your
eye on the road!
1216
01:04:00,204 --> 01:04:02,439
Miss Turner, are you
out of your mind?
1217
01:04:02,472 --> 01:04:05,242
Professor,
I can't sleep nights
because of you!
1218
01:04:05,275 --> 01:04:07,277
Take pills, miss Turner!
1219
01:04:07,311 --> 01:04:10,447
Professor, kiss me!
Kiss me or I'll scream!
1220
01:04:10,480 --> 01:04:11,982
Go ahead, scream!
1221
01:04:12,016 --> 01:04:13,750
I can scream
like Bette Davis!
1222
01:04:13,783 --> 01:04:15,785
No, no, no!
1223
01:04:15,819 --> 01:04:16,820
Don't scream
like Bette Davis.
1224
01:04:16,853 --> 01:04:18,355
Then kiss me!
1225
01:04:18,388 --> 01:04:19,623
Kiss me!
1226
01:04:33,470 --> 01:04:35,305
You missed a place!
1227
01:04:35,339 --> 01:04:37,274
Do it where
the lipstick is!
1228
01:04:37,307 --> 01:04:38,943
Please.
1229
01:04:41,778 --> 01:04:43,981
Why, professor...
1230
01:04:44,014 --> 01:04:46,483
Oh. Mrs. Roberts.
1231
01:04:46,516 --> 01:04:49,219
Come in, sweets.
It's drinky time.
1232
01:04:49,253 --> 01:04:50,921
No, thank you very much.
I'm just leaving.
1233
01:04:50,955 --> 01:04:53,190
Leaving?
You're not leaving.
1234
01:04:53,223 --> 01:04:56,460
I only took archeology
to be near you.
1235
01:04:56,493 --> 01:04:58,328
Miss Turner--
one of my students.
1236
01:04:58,362 --> 01:05:00,864
You must be
a good teacher.
1237
01:05:00,897 --> 01:05:03,233
Oh, thank you.
1238
01:05:04,568 --> 01:05:06,536
Professor?
1239
01:05:06,570 --> 01:05:08,772
Professor!
1240
01:05:08,805 --> 01:05:12,076
Do you realize
that i--
1241
01:05:12,109 --> 01:05:14,744
I even let the air
out of your tires
1242
01:05:14,778 --> 01:05:16,513
just to be near you?!
1243
01:05:16,546 --> 01:05:18,648
Thanks for the lift,
miss Turner.
1244
01:05:25,589 --> 01:05:27,391
**
1245
01:06:15,405 --> 01:06:17,674
Hi.
1246
01:06:17,707 --> 01:06:19,176
Hi. Where you been?
1247
01:06:19,209 --> 01:06:20,910
Barrister school.
1248
01:06:20,944 --> 01:06:23,080
When can we talk...
1249
01:06:23,113 --> 01:06:24,581
Car borrower?
1250
01:06:27,384 --> 01:06:29,953
Hey, what's the patch for?
You breaking out again?
1251
01:06:29,986 --> 01:06:31,521
Come on, let's talk.
You're not gonna
catch anything here.
1252
01:06:31,555 --> 01:06:33,657
I know.
1253
01:06:33,690 --> 01:06:35,759
But I do keep trying.
1254
01:06:42,999 --> 01:06:45,102
Oh! Hey,
I got a big one!
1255
01:06:45,135 --> 01:06:47,637
Get it! Catch it!
1256
01:06:47,671 --> 01:06:48,938
Ohh!
1257
01:06:48,972 --> 01:06:50,707
Give me that!
1258
01:06:50,740 --> 01:06:52,809
Hold on to it, now!
1259
01:06:52,842 --> 01:06:55,079
Hold on! Ohh!
1260
01:06:55,112 --> 01:06:57,381
Hold on, Mike!
1261
01:06:57,414 --> 01:06:59,283
Hey, come on,
give it!
It's my fish!
1262
01:06:59,316 --> 01:07:00,750
What do you mean?
Who's pulling him in?
1263
01:07:00,784 --> 01:07:02,086
You got him?!
I got him!
1264
01:07:02,119 --> 01:07:03,420
I got him!
1265
01:07:03,453 --> 01:07:04,721
You can't even hold on
to the pole!
1266
01:07:04,754 --> 01:07:07,091
Watch out! Aah!
1267
01:07:13,297 --> 01:07:16,533
Help! Can't swim!
1268
01:07:17,767 --> 01:07:19,503
**
1269
01:08:16,593 --> 01:08:19,763
Libby! You're worse
than Liz Turner!
1270
01:08:19,796 --> 01:08:21,165
He almost drowned.
1271
01:08:21,198 --> 01:08:22,532
What?
1272
01:08:22,566 --> 01:08:24,934
I'm giving him
artificial...
1273
01:08:24,968 --> 01:08:26,336
Respiration.
1274
01:08:27,971 --> 01:08:29,673
Get a fire department.
1275
01:08:29,706 --> 01:08:31,441
Right. Yes.
1276
01:08:46,256 --> 01:08:48,258
You stinker!
1277
01:08:48,292 --> 01:08:50,327
Wait'll I tell
the professor.
1278
01:08:50,360 --> 01:08:52,362
What are you
gonna tell him?
You're Helen's daughter?
1279
01:08:54,164 --> 01:08:55,865
What are you
talking about?
1280
01:08:55,899 --> 01:08:57,801
I should've noticed
the resemblance right off.
1281
01:08:57,834 --> 01:08:59,636
You're beautiful,
just like your mother.
1282
01:09:02,172 --> 01:09:05,275
And I'm nutty
about you.
1283
01:09:05,309 --> 01:09:07,811
You're nutty, period.
1284
01:09:07,844 --> 01:09:10,079
Where'd you get
the key to the attic?
That door's always locked.
1285
01:09:10,113 --> 01:09:12,516
It wa you.
1286
01:09:15,585 --> 01:09:17,254
Please don't say
anything.
1287
01:09:19,256 --> 01:09:21,791
Not for me, but...
For my mother.
1288
01:09:24,628 --> 01:09:26,263
All right?
1289
01:09:27,997 --> 01:09:29,566
It's a deal.
1290
01:09:29,599 --> 01:09:30,800
Thank you.
1291
01:09:35,705 --> 01:09:37,274
Lie down.
1292
01:09:39,075 --> 01:09:40,944
Thanks for saving my life.
1293
01:09:48,785 --> 01:09:49,953
What is this?
1294
01:09:53,457 --> 01:09:55,058
( Siren wailing )
1295
01:09:55,091 --> 01:09:56,626
The fire chaps are coming.
1296
01:09:56,660 --> 01:09:59,596
I'll sure be happy when
the pulmotor gets here.
1297
01:09:59,629 --> 01:10:01,665
I could use it for myself.
1298
01:10:05,034 --> 01:10:07,103
Come on, you chaps!
1299
01:10:07,136 --> 01:10:08,572
Okay, kids,
we'll take over.
1300
01:10:25,255 --> 01:10:27,791
( Muffled shouts )
1301
01:10:27,824 --> 01:10:30,494
( Laughs )
1302
01:10:30,527 --> 01:10:32,962
( Muffled shouts )
1303
01:10:38,067 --> 01:10:39,869
( Shouting continues )
1304
01:10:45,074 --> 01:10:47,010
**
1305
01:12:50,500 --> 01:12:52,902
I wonder
where it could be.
1306
01:12:52,936 --> 01:12:54,771
What are you
looking for?
1307
01:12:54,804 --> 01:12:57,441
My bone--
it's missing.
1308
01:12:57,474 --> 01:12:59,776
Missing? Ow could
that bone be missing?
1309
01:12:59,809 --> 01:13:01,811
I don't know.
Somebody must've taken it.
1310
01:13:01,845 --> 01:13:03,480
It couldn't
just walk away.
1311
01:13:03,513 --> 01:13:05,281
Why not?
It's a leg bone.
1312
01:13:05,314 --> 01:13:07,451
Michael, that is
a very important bone.
1313
01:13:07,484 --> 01:13:10,253
I want to show it
to Dean crowley tomorrow.
1314
01:13:10,286 --> 01:13:12,889
( Whines )
Michael...
1315
01:13:12,922 --> 01:13:14,724
Hmm?
1316
01:13:14,758 --> 01:13:17,326
You don't think that...
1317
01:13:17,360 --> 01:13:19,763
Jess took it? Ha!
Come on, professor.
1318
01:13:19,796 --> 01:13:21,831
Jess like you.
She's not gonna
take your old bone.
1319
01:13:21,865 --> 01:13:25,001
Are you, Jess?
( Whines )
1320
01:13:29,305 --> 01:13:31,675
Jessica looks
very guilty.
1321
01:13:31,708 --> 01:13:36,079
If she did take it,
she would've left traces
in the sand.
1322
01:13:36,112 --> 01:13:38,482
**
1323
01:13:40,617 --> 01:13:42,018
there you are--
she d drag it away!
1324
01:13:58,067 --> 01:14:00,537
Well, come on,
don't just stand there!
1325
01:14:05,174 --> 01:14:08,311
Hello,
professor Patterson.
1326
01:14:08,344 --> 01:14:11,280
Oh, hello,
miss pilkington.
1327
01:14:11,314 --> 01:14:12,782
Lovely day.
Excuse me.
1328
01:14:21,324 --> 01:14:22,559
There he is!
1329
01:14:22,592 --> 01:14:24,193
Here we are!
1330
01:14:25,895 --> 01:14:27,631
Oh, professor,
look...
1331
01:14:27,664 --> 01:14:29,999
Oh! E's digging
like a dog!
1332
01:14:30,033 --> 01:14:31,935
Probably
an English bull.
1333
01:14:33,603 --> 01:14:35,605
Here it is!
1334
01:14:35,639 --> 01:14:37,106
I knew it! I knew it!
1335
01:14:39,676 --> 01:14:41,845
( Grunting )
1336
01:14:41,878 --> 01:14:44,380
Look at the size
of that bone!
1337
01:14:44,413 --> 01:14:46,482
Ooh!
1338
01:14:46,516 --> 01:14:48,585
( Both chattering )
1339
01:14:48,618 --> 01:14:50,453
No! Don't do that!
1340
01:14:50,486 --> 01:14:52,622
( Shouting )
1341
01:14:52,656 --> 01:14:54,357
It's the shin bone
of a dinosaur!
1342
01:14:54,390 --> 01:14:56,225
A beautiful specimen.
1343
01:14:56,259 --> 01:14:58,895
Relax, professor,
you've got your old bone.
1344
01:14:58,928 --> 01:15:01,931
Michael,
it isn't the bone.
1345
01:15:01,965 --> 01:15:04,634
I'm sorry, professor.
So Liz Turner let the smog
out of your tire.
1346
01:15:04,668 --> 01:15:06,169
Then what?
1347
01:15:06,202 --> 01:15:08,337
Out of my tires.
1348
01:15:08,371 --> 01:15:10,439
Sit down. Tell me
all about it.
1349
01:15:10,473 --> 01:15:13,743
I'm so weary of it all.
1350
01:15:13,777 --> 01:15:16,580
Professor,
you've got the kind
of problem
1351
01:15:16,613 --> 01:15:18,414
that every American man
would like to have.
1352
01:15:18,447 --> 01:15:20,416
Michael,
it's no joking matter.
1353
01:15:20,449 --> 01:15:22,418
These girls will
drive me up the wall.
1354
01:15:22,451 --> 01:15:24,420
You can stop it
if you want.
1355
01:15:24,453 --> 01:15:26,522
How?
1356
01:15:26,556 --> 01:15:29,492
Be aggressive.
Chase them.
1357
01:15:29,525 --> 01:15:31,595
They'll leave
you alone.
1358
01:15:31,628 --> 01:15:34,430
Say that again.
1359
01:15:34,463 --> 01:15:37,734
Well, take me,
for instance.
1360
01:15:37,767 --> 01:15:42,371
I run after girls,
I come up empty.
1361
01:15:42,405 --> 01:15:45,308
I thought you were
supposed to have success
with the opposite sex.
1362
01:15:48,411 --> 01:15:50,947
To be perfectly honest
with you, professor...
1363
01:15:50,980 --> 01:15:54,150
The only girls I get
are the ones I promise
to introduce to you.
1364
01:15:54,183 --> 01:15:56,986
Oh, Michael,
you must be jesting.
1365
01:15:57,020 --> 01:16:00,690
It makes me sick
to be so honest.
1366
01:16:00,724 --> 01:16:03,860
Well, take Gladys,
for instance.
1367
01:16:03,893 --> 01:16:06,329
The only reason she
brings me food and drink
1368
01:16:06,362 --> 01:16:08,798
is so I'll
introduce her to you.
1369
01:16:08,832 --> 01:16:11,234
And Dolly--
remember Dolly?
1370
01:16:11,267 --> 01:16:13,502
Wasn't she the one
who hid in the back
of my car?
1371
01:16:13,536 --> 01:16:17,240
No, Dolly's the one
who pretended to faint
in your bathtub.
1372
01:16:17,273 --> 01:16:20,844
Gracious, yes,
how could I possibly
forget her?
1373
01:16:20,877 --> 01:16:23,780
Bend down to pull her out
and got all those bubbles
in my eyes.
1374
01:16:23,813 --> 01:16:26,616
Yes, yes, hmm, hmm.
1375
01:16:26,650 --> 01:16:30,186
Be aggressive,
chase them? Mm?
1376
01:16:30,219 --> 01:16:32,288
That's in, professor.
1377
01:16:32,321 --> 01:16:34,023
I couldn't do that.
1378
01:16:34,057 --> 01:16:36,793
It's against
my basic character.
1379
01:16:36,826 --> 01:16:39,629
You could do it with
a bit of stimulus.
1380
01:16:39,663 --> 01:16:41,197
Come.
1381
01:16:45,068 --> 01:16:47,370
Now, uh...
You know the story
1382
01:16:47,403 --> 01:16:49,438
of Dr. Jekyll
and Mr. Hyde.
1383
01:16:49,472 --> 01:16:52,976
Of course I do.
A classic tale of
split-personality.
1384
01:16:53,009 --> 01:16:55,344
The schizophrenic
Dr. Jekyll drinks
the potion
1385
01:16:55,378 --> 01:16:57,380
and turns into the
horrible Mr. Hyde.
1386
01:16:57,413 --> 01:16:59,582
That's right.
1387
01:16:59,615 --> 01:17:01,718
A scotch...
1388
01:17:01,751 --> 01:17:04,120
And bourbon...
1389
01:17:07,023 --> 01:17:08,725
Potion.
1390
01:17:10,626 --> 01:17:12,028
I know
you don't drink...
1391
01:17:12,061 --> 01:17:14,864
But greetings,
Mr. Hyde.
1392
01:17:18,067 --> 01:17:20,737
You really think
this will make
any difference?
1393
01:17:20,770 --> 01:17:22,839
Heh heh.
It'll take time--
1394
01:17:22,872 --> 01:17:24,741
a couple of seconds.
1395
01:17:36,986 --> 01:17:38,722
Will you bring in
the bags, please?
1396
01:17:38,755 --> 01:17:40,323
Yes, lady.
1397
01:17:40,356 --> 01:17:41,925
Oh, hello, frank.
1398
01:17:41,958 --> 01:17:44,928
Oh, hello,
miss bushmill.
1399
01:17:44,961 --> 01:17:47,096
So happy
to see you home.
1400
01:17:47,130 --> 01:17:49,165
Thank you.
It's good to be home.
1401
01:17:51,200 --> 01:17:52,702
You don't feel
anything?
1402
01:17:52,736 --> 01:17:54,570
Not a thing.
1403
01:17:54,603 --> 01:17:57,340
Don't particularly care
for the taste of it,
either.
1404
01:17:57,373 --> 01:17:59,442
Maybe I shouldn't
have made it with
scotch and bourbon.
1405
01:17:59,475 --> 01:18:00,944
I'll make this one
with vodka.
1406
01:18:00,977 --> 01:18:02,578
There's no taste
to vodka.
1407
01:18:02,611 --> 01:18:03,913
Look what it does
for nikita.
1408
01:18:15,024 --> 01:18:17,493
Paul! Are you
following me?
1409
01:18:17,526 --> 01:18:19,628
Well, I thought
perhaps I could be
of some help...
1410
01:18:19,662 --> 01:18:22,565
In case things do not
go as you wish.
1411
01:18:22,598 --> 01:18:25,368
Oh, Paul.
You are a dear.
1412
01:18:25,401 --> 01:18:27,003
Thank you.
1413
01:18:27,036 --> 01:18:28,704
I was just on the way
to the beach.
1414
01:18:28,738 --> 01:18:30,406
To tell him of Libby?
1415
01:18:30,439 --> 01:18:32,075
Yes, I'm going to
tell him about Libby.
1416
01:18:40,449 --> 01:18:42,318
( Barking )
1417
01:18:54,063 --> 01:18:56,766
Well, Jessie, honey,
are you glad to see me?
1418
01:18:56,800 --> 01:18:58,701
Oh!
How are you,
miss bushmill?
1419
01:18:58,734 --> 01:19:00,269
Is Bruce around?
1420
01:19:00,303 --> 01:19:02,171
Um...he's still
at the college.
1421
01:19:02,205 --> 01:19:05,574
Oh. Well,
I didn't call him
1422
01:19:05,608 --> 01:19:07,844
because I wanted it
to be a surprise.
Yeah.
1423
01:19:10,013 --> 01:19:12,481
( Laughing hysterically )
1424
01:19:16,986 --> 01:19:20,223
( Humming )
1425
01:19:34,838 --> 01:19:37,573
( Ringing )
1426
01:19:37,606 --> 01:19:39,843
Mm-hmm.
1427
01:19:51,354 --> 01:19:53,756
Guess who?
1428
01:19:53,789 --> 01:19:55,424
Splendid.
1429
01:19:59,896 --> 01:20:02,165
( Humming )
1430
01:20:06,669 --> 01:20:08,704
Professor...
1431
01:20:08,737 --> 01:20:11,774
I'm going to enroll
in your classes.
1432
01:20:11,807 --> 01:20:15,945
I dig that crazy
homework you do.
1433
01:20:15,979 --> 01:20:19,548
Mm! With your pupils.
1434
01:20:19,582 --> 01:20:23,786
Heh! Gorgeous
creature, you.
1435
01:20:23,819 --> 01:20:25,922
( Sighs )
1436
01:20:30,426 --> 01:20:33,429
Aah! Oh! Oh!
1437
01:20:35,264 --> 01:20:36,765
Uh--
1438
01:20:36,799 --> 01:20:38,534
professor Patterson!
1439
01:20:38,567 --> 01:20:40,503
What's happened to you?
1440
01:20:40,536 --> 01:20:43,006
Aah!
( Laughing )
1441
01:20:43,039 --> 01:20:45,274
Well, that's Bruce
and Mrs. Roberts!
1442
01:20:45,308 --> 01:20:47,710
( Screaming )
1443
01:20:47,743 --> 01:20:48,811
What's the matter
with you?!
1444
01:20:48,844 --> 01:20:50,179
Because, uh--
1445
01:20:54,317 --> 01:20:57,520
where are you,
maid Marion? Ah!
1446
01:20:57,553 --> 01:21:00,689
( Screaming )
1447
01:21:00,723 --> 01:21:02,625
Ha ha ha ha ha!
1448
01:21:02,658 --> 01:21:05,461
That is Bruce--
without his trousers!
1449
01:21:07,396 --> 01:21:09,565
Mister?
1450
01:21:09,598 --> 01:21:12,768
Martini time!
1451
01:21:12,801 --> 01:21:14,203
Wait for daddy.
1452
01:21:15,972 --> 01:21:17,106
( Muffled shouts )
1453
01:21:23,812 --> 01:21:27,283
Ooh, professor,
what cute shorts.
1454
01:21:27,316 --> 01:21:30,253
You going swimming?
I'll join you.
1455
01:21:30,286 --> 01:21:33,556
Why waste time swimming,
my little stuffed olive?
1456
01:21:33,589 --> 01:21:34,991
( Laughing )
1457
01:21:35,024 --> 01:21:37,493
Professor,
what's wrong with you?
1458
01:21:37,526 --> 01:21:41,097
Nothing! Ha ha ha ha!
1459
01:21:41,130 --> 01:21:43,967
Tally ho!
Not to mention...
Ole!
1460
01:21:44,000 --> 01:21:45,834
( Screaming )
1461
01:21:45,868 --> 01:21:47,470
Aha!
1462
01:21:47,503 --> 01:21:49,238
( Tarzan yell )
1463
01:21:51,707 --> 01:21:53,409
( Screaming )
( Laughing )
1464
01:21:55,711 --> 01:21:57,680
Whoops!
1465
01:22:00,016 --> 01:22:01,951
Yah!
1466
01:22:01,985 --> 01:22:03,919
( Screaming )
1467
01:22:03,953 --> 01:22:06,755
( Strings breaking )
1468
01:22:06,789 --> 01:22:08,257
( Screaming )
1469
01:22:11,527 --> 01:22:14,130
Ah, there you are!
1470
01:22:14,163 --> 01:22:16,132
( Indistinct chatter
and laughter )
1471
01:22:22,271 --> 01:22:24,507
Hello,
professor Patterson.
1472
01:22:24,540 --> 01:22:27,510
Oh, miss pilkington!
1473
01:22:27,543 --> 01:22:29,745
Another lovely day.
1474
01:22:29,778 --> 01:22:31,280
Oh, yes.
1475
01:22:33,882 --> 01:22:35,851
Tally ho!
1476
01:22:35,884 --> 01:22:37,286
( Laughing )
1477
01:22:44,593 --> 01:22:46,495
Miss bushmill,
don't do that because--
1478
01:22:46,529 --> 01:22:47,730
ohh!
1479
01:22:49,232 --> 01:22:50,633
Aha!
1480
01:22:50,666 --> 01:22:52,035
Aah!
1481
01:22:54,570 --> 01:22:56,305
( Laughing )
1482
01:22:56,339 --> 01:22:58,074
( Screaming )
Yah!
1483
01:22:58,107 --> 01:22:59,742
( Grunting )
1484
01:23:13,756 --> 01:23:16,425
Ha ha!
Lizzie Turner.
1485
01:23:16,459 --> 01:23:18,961
Oh, professor.
1486
01:23:18,994 --> 01:23:21,197
Aah! Hat are
you doing?
1487
01:23:26,001 --> 01:23:28,637
Huh! Mike! Mike?
1488
01:23:30,139 --> 01:23:33,342
( Screaming )
1489
01:23:40,083 --> 01:23:41,750
( Sighs )
1490
01:23:43,852 --> 01:23:45,388
Oh, Mike.
1491
01:23:46,855 --> 01:23:49,958
( Screaming )
1492
01:23:49,992 --> 01:23:51,427
( Yawns )
1493
01:23:51,460 --> 01:23:53,096
Bye-bye!
1494
01:24:01,036 --> 01:24:02,471
Mike, old boy!
1495
01:24:02,505 --> 01:24:04,840
It worked,
just as you said!
1496
01:24:04,873 --> 01:24:06,675
Yippee!
1497
01:24:17,520 --> 01:24:19,788
Miss bushmill,
let me explain.
1498
01:24:19,822 --> 01:24:21,023
I got him drunk.
You see--
1499
01:24:21,056 --> 01:24:22,991
no, no, I don't see.
1500
01:24:23,025 --> 01:24:24,527
There he is--
1501
01:24:24,560 --> 01:24:26,829
the shy englishman
I fell in love with.
1502
01:25:32,060 --> 01:25:34,062
While you were gone,
the phone rang.
1503
01:25:34,096 --> 01:25:36,699
I answered it.
Hmm?
1504
01:25:36,732 --> 01:25:39,268
It was Libby's school.
1505
01:25:39,302 --> 01:25:40,903
She has been missing
for a week.
1506
01:25:40,936 --> 01:25:42,538
Missing?!
1507
01:25:42,571 --> 01:25:44,740
They said they
tried to reach you.
1508
01:25:46,108 --> 01:25:47,843
Missing?
1509
01:25:47,876 --> 01:25:49,812
Where could she be?
1510
01:25:49,845 --> 01:25:51,547
Look!
1511
01:25:51,580 --> 01:25:53,782
Mother.
1512
01:25:55,518 --> 01:25:56,519
Libby!
1513
01:25:59,988 --> 01:26:02,558
Libby!
Mother?
1514
01:26:02,591 --> 01:26:04,693
Ha ha!
1515
01:26:04,727 --> 01:26:06,161
Mother.
1516
01:26:06,195 --> 01:26:08,264
Why did you run away?
1517
01:26:08,297 --> 01:26:09,698
I just heard
you'd been missing.
1518
01:26:09,732 --> 01:26:10,933
Ohh.
1519
01:26:13,135 --> 01:26:16,038
Ooh, he scares me
sitting there
like that.
1520
01:26:16,071 --> 01:26:18,641
What are you
whispering about?
1521
01:26:18,674 --> 01:26:20,943
He couldn't hear
a cape canaveral
blast-off.
1522
01:26:20,976 --> 01:26:24,179
I never saw
anybody that stiff,
not even my mother.
1523
01:26:24,213 --> 01:26:25,548
It's like he's dead.
1524
01:26:25,581 --> 01:26:27,783
Hey, easy on
the curves, huh?
1525
01:26:41,830 --> 01:26:43,266
Uhh...
1526
01:26:49,238 --> 01:26:51,307
You all right,
professor?!
1527
01:26:53,075 --> 01:26:55,177
Hang on, old boy!
1528
01:26:55,210 --> 01:26:57,413
We're almost there!
1529
01:27:07,856 --> 01:27:11,427
There he goes...
Just like mother.
1530
01:27:12,828 --> 01:27:14,330
Oh, thank you.
1531
01:27:17,232 --> 01:27:19,702
Honey, what's wrong?
1532
01:27:19,735 --> 01:27:21,804
I have to talk to you
about something.
1533
01:27:21,837 --> 01:27:23,806
Do you two ladies
wish to be alone?
1534
01:27:23,839 --> 01:27:25,374
No, Mr. Dukoff.
1535
01:27:25,408 --> 01:27:27,042
( Doorbell rings )
1536
01:27:27,075 --> 01:27:28,611
Excuse me.
1537
01:27:40,188 --> 01:27:41,790
Helen.
1538
01:27:41,824 --> 01:27:43,292
You--
1539
01:27:43,326 --> 01:27:45,328
you maniac!
1540
01:27:45,361 --> 01:27:47,930
Please listen to me.
1541
01:27:47,963 --> 01:27:50,132
I have done
all the listening
I intend to do,
1542
01:27:50,165 --> 01:27:52,868
you--you two-faced
Judas!
1543
01:27:52,901 --> 01:27:54,937
I saw you today--
1544
01:27:54,970 --> 01:27:57,340
you and your
ridiculous umbrella.
1545
01:27:57,373 --> 01:28:01,877
When I first met you,
that umbrella
was charming.
1546
01:28:01,910 --> 01:28:05,247
It was--it was
a bit of old england.
1547
01:28:05,280 --> 01:28:08,384
( Sobbing )
Now it's become a symbol
of my stupidity!
1548
01:28:12,521 --> 01:28:14,323
I should've known that
any man who carried an
umbrella in California
1549
01:28:14,357 --> 01:28:16,459
was a fool!
1550
01:28:16,492 --> 01:28:19,395
But not as big a fool
as I've been!
1551
01:28:19,428 --> 01:28:20,996
Mother, listen,
please.
1552
01:28:21,029 --> 01:28:22,431
Please listen.
1553
01:28:22,465 --> 01:28:23,932
And I'm happy
to tell you
1554
01:28:23,966 --> 01:28:25,601
that I did not
tell you the
whole truth!
1555
01:28:25,634 --> 01:28:28,537
I have
a 17-year-old
daughter.
1556
01:28:28,571 --> 01:28:30,473
I'm 18 today.
1557
01:28:30,506 --> 01:28:32,274
An 18-year-old
daughter.
1558
01:28:32,307 --> 01:28:34,009
Happy birthday.
1559
01:28:34,042 --> 01:28:35,511
Happy birthday.
1560
01:28:38,781 --> 01:28:40,383
( Sobbing )
1561
01:28:47,390 --> 01:28:50,292
That ridiculous
englishman.
1562
01:28:50,325 --> 01:28:53,962
Ridiculous umbrella!
1563
01:28:53,996 --> 01:28:55,531
( Thunder )
1564
01:28:56,899 --> 01:28:58,667
Come on!
1565
01:29:02,371 --> 01:29:04,407
( Thunder continues )
1566
01:29:17,019 --> 01:29:18,987
**
1567
01:29:27,129 --> 01:29:29,932
Darling,
please forgive me.
1568
01:29:29,965 --> 01:29:33,602
It's raining
in California!
1569
01:29:33,636 --> 01:29:36,171
Forgive me, too,
please!
1570
01:29:36,204 --> 01:29:37,706
I'm Libby.
1571
01:29:37,740 --> 01:29:43,812
Yes. Libby Smith
bushmill Patterson!
1572
01:29:43,846 --> 01:29:48,150
Libby Smith bushmill
Patterson...
1573
01:29:48,183 --> 01:29:49,852
Pulaski?
1574
01:29:49,885 --> 01:29:51,820
Mike: Well,
that's the way it was.
1575
01:29:51,854 --> 01:29:54,289
We were all wet
and all together
in togetherness.
1576
01:29:54,322 --> 01:29:57,359
And don't feel sorry
for Gladys schmidlapp.
1577
01:29:57,392 --> 01:29:59,127
She did all right.
1578
01:29:59,161 --> 01:30:00,863
Paul and Gladys are now
very happy in Paris,
1579
01:30:00,896 --> 01:30:02,097
where I think
they got married.
1580
01:30:02,130 --> 01:30:03,866
( Hiccups )
1581
01:30:03,899 --> 01:30:06,034
And Helen
and the professor--
1582
01:30:06,068 --> 01:30:08,737
they had their honeymoon
in the desert,
1583
01:30:08,771 --> 01:30:10,906
where they're
really digging.
1584
01:30:19,782 --> 01:30:21,517
And let's not forget
professor bowman.
1585
01:30:22,851 --> 01:30:25,954
You find any bones
yet, sweetheart?
1586
01:30:25,988 --> 01:30:27,856
Bowman: Echoing
nope, no bones!
1587
01:30:27,890 --> 01:30:31,159
But there's something
strange down here!
1588
01:30:31,193 --> 01:30:33,829
Strange?
What do you mean?
1589
01:30:33,862 --> 01:30:36,364
( Crashing )
1590
01:30:36,398 --> 01:30:38,534
( Rumbling )
1591
01:30:43,438 --> 01:30:48,544
**
108139
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