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{\i1}Theorizing that one could time travel
within his own lifetime,{\i0}
2
00:00:04,560 --> 00:00:07,760
{\i1}Dr. Sam Beckett stepped
into the Quantum Leap accelerator...{\i0}
3
00:00:07,880 --> 00:00:09,800
{\i1}and vanished.{\i0}
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00:00:13,960 --> 00:00:16,920
{\i1}He awoke to find himself
trapped in the past,{\i0}
5
00:00:17,080 --> 00:00:20,000
{\i1}facing mirror images
that were not his own...{\i0}
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00:00:20,080 --> 00:00:24,400
{\i1}and driven by an unknown force
to change history for the better.{\i0}
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00:00:25,200 --> 00:00:29,400
{\i1}His only guide on this journey is Al,
an observer from his own time,{\i0}
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00:00:29,480 --> 00:00:33,880
{\i1}who appears in the form of a hologram
that only Sam can see and hear.{\i0}
9
00:00:34,200 --> 00:00:38,200
{\i1}And so, Dr. Beckett finds himself
leaping from life to life,{\i0}
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00:00:38,320 --> 00:00:41,040
{\i1}striving to put right
what once went wrong...{\i0}
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00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:44,080
{\i1}and hoping each time
that his next leap...{\i0}
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00:00:44,400 --> 00:00:46,840
{\i1}will be the leap home.{\i0}
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00:01:01,200 --> 00:01:03,880
You killed
my three brothers, Tyler.
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That just leaves you and me.
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Take him, Tyler.
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00:01:10,840 --> 00:01:14,520
And this town ain't big enough
for the two of us.
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Oh, boy.
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The question is, Tyler,
who's it gonna be...
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00:02:29,240 --> 00:02:32,120
me... or you?
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00:02:32,160 --> 00:02:34,600
- Put him away, Tyler.
- Couldn't we just, uh,
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00:02:34,720 --> 00:02:36,440
talk about... about this?
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00:02:36,480 --> 00:02:38,480
The time for talkin' is through.
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00:02:38,720 --> 00:02:41,520
Now's the time for hot lead.
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00:02:52,520 --> 00:02:55,000
I'm sorry, I...
I didn't think that...
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00:02:55,080 --> 00:02:57,440
He... He would, uh...
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Thank you! Thank you, all!
Now, let's give a big round of applause...
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for the man who single-handedly
cleaned up Coffin, Arizona.
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Tyler Means!
29
00:03:08,400 --> 00:03:10,560
And for those of you
who missed it,
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00:03:10,680 --> 00:03:14,520
Mr. Means will be reenacting
his legendary shootout,
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00:03:14,640 --> 00:03:17,920
in which he shot and killed
the four Claggett Brothers,
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00:03:18,040 --> 00:03:20,800
tomorrow at high noon!
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00:03:21,320 --> 00:03:23,960
Until then,
well, I hope you all...
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00:03:24,080 --> 00:03:27,720
eat, drink and spend lots of money!
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00:03:32,560 --> 00:03:33,800
You okay, Tyler?
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00:03:33,880 --> 00:03:36,040
Oh, I-I-I'm okay.
I just, uh... My spurs...
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00:03:36,160 --> 00:03:38,640
My spurs got caught on the steps, uh...
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Mr. Means,
can we have your autograph?
39
00:03:45,000 --> 00:03:46,760
Uh, sure.
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00:03:50,560 --> 00:03:53,240
"The Last Gunfighter:
The Life and Times of Tyler Means."
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00:03:53,360 --> 00:03:55,440
That's...
W-Well, what's your name?
42
00:03:55,520 --> 00:03:57,600
- Cindy and Kyle.
- All right.
43
00:03:57,880 --> 00:04:01,240
To Cindy and Kyle.
44
00:04:01,960 --> 00:04:04,600
- Hey.
- Tyler... Means... That's me.
45
00:04:04,720 --> 00:04:06,360
- Okay, there you go.
- Thanks.
46
00:04:06,480 --> 00:04:07,960
Have a good time.
47
00:04:08,840 --> 00:04:11,520
Grandpa T. Grandpa T.
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00:04:11,600 --> 00:04:14,600
- Can I carry your gun?
- No, you may not.
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00:04:14,720 --> 00:04:17,920
Stevie, guns aren't things to fool around
with, even if they're loaded with blanks.
50
00:04:18,040 --> 00:04:20,920
Aw, Mom! Grandpa T.
had a gun when he was 12.
51
00:04:21,040 --> 00:04:22,720
I'll tell you
what, uh, Stevie...
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00:04:22,840 --> 00:04:24,480
T., you've told
enough stories already.
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00:04:24,600 --> 00:04:26,960
One of these days,
I wish you'd get started on the truth.
54
00:04:27,160 --> 00:04:28,840
But they were true!
55
00:04:29,040 --> 00:04:32,160
Or else they wouldn't have been printed
in that {\i1}Reader's Digest,{\i0} would they?
56
00:04:32,240 --> 00:04:35,880
Stevie, not everybody can tell when T.'s
tellin' a story and when he's not.
57
00:04:36,320 --> 00:04:38,680
It's just too bad that fellow happened
to be from {\i1}Reader's Digest.{\i0}
58
00:04:38,800 --> 00:04:41,120
Lucy? We've got tables
that need waitin' on.
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00:04:41,240 --> 00:04:42,680
Okay, just a minute.
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00:04:43,160 --> 00:04:45,320
T., please don't let him play
with your gun, okay?
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00:04:45,370 --> 00:04:47,100
Just take it home and
put it away someplace.
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00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:48,290
Okay.
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00:04:48,340 --> 00:04:50,990
Okay. As soon as you wash up, come back.
I'll get you both some lunch.
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00:04:51,600 --> 00:04:54,920
Love you.
And you... love you too.
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00:04:57,520 --> 00:04:59,320
Come on, Grandpa T.
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00:04:59,680 --> 00:05:02,800
I just don't understand why you
got to have a gun when you were a kid...
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00:05:03,280 --> 00:05:04,720
I can't.
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00:05:04,880 --> 00:05:07,560
Well, times have changed a lot
since I was a kid.
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00:05:07,680 --> 00:05:10,960
Stevie, you know,
you don't need a gun nowadays.
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00:05:14,320 --> 00:05:16,160
That's easy, Stevie.
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00:05:16,600 --> 00:05:19,320
You just make it up
like your granddaddy did.
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00:05:19,440 --> 00:05:23,200
But he didn't make it up.
D-Did you?
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00:05:23,480 --> 00:05:24,760
Uh...
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00:05:24,830 --> 00:05:27,030
Well, I might have maybe
exaggerated a little bit, but...
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00:05:27,080 --> 00:05:29,200
And the rest he just lied about.
76
00:05:29,920 --> 00:05:32,960
See, Stevie, you can't believe
everything you hear.
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00:05:33,080 --> 00:05:34,840
Now, if the town
wasn't makin' money
78
00:05:34,920 --> 00:05:37,520
building a hero for this
centennial celebration,
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00:05:37,640 --> 00:05:40,720
why your granddaddy'd
be over at Mr. East's hotel,
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00:05:40,840 --> 00:05:42,880
having drinks
and telling stories...
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00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:44,800
and goin' to sleep
with a glass in his hand,
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00:05:44,920 --> 00:05:48,200
instead of parading around
in some dime-store outfit,
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00:05:48,320 --> 00:05:51,360
pretending to be
a gunslinger for a bunch of tourists.
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00:05:51,640 --> 00:05:55,160
But he wasn't pretending.
He really was one!
85
00:05:55,600 --> 00:05:57,400
You're the one who's a liar.
86
00:05:57,680 --> 00:06:02,160
Now, Stevie, is that the way your
granddaddy told you to speak to me?
87
00:06:02,280 --> 00:06:03,880
No, sir.
88
00:06:05,200 --> 00:06:08,680
He said never waste your breath
on anyone who's dumber than a mule.
89
00:06:09,320 --> 00:06:12,800
And that any sheriff that fat and slow
wasn't worth gettin' to know,
90
00:06:12,920 --> 00:06:14,900
'cause he'd he dead
before he knew it.
91
00:06:14,920 --> 00:06:17,140
We don't wanna be late for lunch.
Will you excuse us, Sheriff?
92
00:06:17,160 --> 00:06:18,800
Thank you.
93
00:06:24,680 --> 00:06:27,560
Hey, Grandpa,
can I wear your gun belt after lunch?
94
00:06:27,840 --> 00:06:28,800
Uh...
95
00:06:28,920 --> 00:06:30,880
I mean,
I'll stay out of Mom's sight.
96
00:06:31,840 --> 00:06:35,080
I think maybe today we should
just do what she says, okay?
97
00:06:36,440 --> 00:06:38,680
Well, you want me to take this up
to your room?
98
00:06:40,240 --> 00:06:41,680
Okay.
99
00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:44,840
All right. But, listen.
You be careful with this, okay?
100
00:06:44,960 --> 00:06:49,000
You be very careful.
A gun is not a toy, you know.
101
00:06:49,400 --> 00:06:52,480
I don't know why Mom's got to go
ruin all the fun all the time.
102
00:06:53,120 --> 00:06:55,960
Nice hat. Nice!
103
00:06:56,080 --> 00:06:58,720
Really stylish. Awesome.
Fantastic outfit too.
104
00:06:58,840 --> 00:07:02,280
What happened... Did Tonto and
Bill Hickok have a collision?
105
00:07:02,400 --> 00:07:06,320
Very funny. I happen to be a
local hero or somethin' like that.
106
00:07:06,440 --> 00:07:09,800
You sure you're not
a walking ad for a fringe company?
107
00:07:13,480 --> 00:07:16,800
It's, uh, November 28, 1957,
108
00:07:16,880 --> 00:07:19,880
- and your name is...
- Tyler Means.
109
00:07:20,080 --> 00:07:21,680
Yeah. Ty...
Tyler Means.
110
00:07:21,800 --> 00:07:25,720
You're 82 years old,
and you live in Coffin, Arizona.
111
00:07:25,840 --> 00:07:27,440
Isn't that a nice name... Coffin.
112
00:07:27,560 --> 00:07:30,160
This place started out
as a robbers' hangout,
113
00:07:30,280 --> 00:07:31,960
and then it took off when...
114
00:07:32,080 --> 00:07:34,160
When they discovered
silver in the mid-1870s.
115
00:07:34,280 --> 00:07:36,880
Hey, you want me to tell you
this stuff or you want to read it?
116
00:07:37,440 --> 00:07:40,680
All right. Back then,
this place was wide open,
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00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:44,320
and it was controlled
by four vicious gunslingers...
118
00:07:44,440 --> 00:07:47,520
by the name of the Cl-Cl...
Claggett brothers.
119
00:07:47,600 --> 00:07:50,840
Anyway, apparently,
you rode into town...
120
00:07:50,920 --> 00:07:53,640
with an old gunfighter partner
of yours,
121
00:07:53,760 --> 00:07:55,280
and the next thing you know...
122
00:07:55,310 --> 00:07:57,160
We got into a shootout
with the Claggett boys.
123
00:07:57,280 --> 00:07:59,480
Yeah, and you saved the town.
124
00:07:59,560 --> 00:08:01,720
But then, you settled down.
125
00:08:01,800 --> 00:08:04,880
You're the B.M.O.C.,
and all the townsfolks,
126
00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:07,400
they're very amused
by your wild stories...
127
00:08:07,520 --> 00:08:09,200
and your boasting
and your bragging...
128
00:08:09,280 --> 00:08:11,080
and your gambling
and your drinkin', but...
129
00:08:11,200 --> 00:08:13,400
after a couple of decades
of sponging,
130
00:08:13,480 --> 00:08:17,280
the townsfolk kind of get sick of it,
and your tales get wilder,
131
00:08:17,400 --> 00:08:20,840
and you become a local joke...
the town drunk.
132
00:08:20,960 --> 00:08:23,720
You're weaving your tales
and mooching drinks.
133
00:08:23,960 --> 00:08:27,640
- Until I met this magazine writer.
- Mmm.
134
00:08:27,920 --> 00:08:29,960
And Ziggy doesn't have
anything more than that,
135
00:08:30,040 --> 00:08:32,040
because these little towns
didn't keep good records.
136
00:08:32,160 --> 00:08:33,840
But when something comes up...
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00:08:34,480 --> 00:08:36,080
You'll be the first to know.
138
00:08:37,160 --> 00:08:38,960
Uh, in the meantime,
139
00:08:39,080 --> 00:08:41,880
Hi-ho, Silver! Oy vey.
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00:08:50,960 --> 00:08:55,280
Ladies and gentlemen,
the hero of Coffin. Arizona,
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00:08:55,400 --> 00:08:58,520
Mr. Tyler Means!
142
00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:02,400
Thank you. Thank you.
No-no. No. No, thanks.
143
00:09:02,520 --> 00:09:05,720
- Oh, since when?
- Since, uh, now.
144
00:09:05,840 --> 00:09:07,810
T., you want to come over here?
145
00:09:08,240 --> 00:09:11,320
I swear, I don't know who's
a bigger handful... Stevie or him.
146
00:09:11,440 --> 00:09:14,560
You know, the boy has something
we can incorporate into the series.
147
00:09:14,680 --> 00:09:16,480
It could be very interesting.
148
00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:20,960
T., Mr. Steiner here wants to write
up your life story for the television.
149
00:09:21,080 --> 00:09:23,200
- He's from Hollywood.
- How you doin'?
150
00:09:23,560 --> 00:09:25,840
How does that idea
strike you, Mr. Means?
151
00:09:26,040 --> 00:09:29,840
You two sit yourself down here with
Mr. Steiner while I get you some lunch.
152
00:09:30,200 --> 00:09:33,640
And, Stevie, mind your manners.
It's T. Mr. Steiner wants to talk to.
153
00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:36,120
Let me lay it out for you,
Mr. Means.
154
00:09:36,560 --> 00:09:39,280
NBC's been looking for a good idea
for a new Western.
155
00:09:39,400 --> 00:09:41,360
Th-They're very popular
right now.
156
00:09:41,520 --> 00:09:44,040
Now we read your story
in the magazine,
157
00:09:44,160 --> 00:09:46,080
and it gave us an idea.
158
00:09:46,880 --> 00:09:52,520
"The Last Gunfighter:
The Life and Times of Tyler Means."
159
00:09:52,640 --> 00:09:55,480
- Grandpa T., you're gonna be on TV.
- Oh, I-I don't think...
160
00:09:55,600 --> 00:09:57,440
that's exactly what he meant,
Stevie.
161
00:09:57,760 --> 00:10:00,960
No. We were thinking of having someone
play him when he was younger.
162
00:10:01,080 --> 00:10:05,440
Uh, Randolph Scott, Robert Taylor,
uh, maybe Dana Andrews?
163
00:10:05,800 --> 00:10:07,840
Now, what I'd like to do,
Mr. Means,
164
00:10:07,920 --> 00:10:10,760
is have some of the people
who handle the business affairs for us...
165
00:10:10,880 --> 00:10:15,000
talk to you and work out a contract that
would cover the rights to your life story.
166
00:10:15,200 --> 00:10:18,640
And then we would sit down,
and you would tell me your history.
167
00:10:18,720 --> 00:10:20,480
Oh, Grandpa T.'s
got lots of stories.
168
00:10:20,600 --> 00:10:23,320
And that's just what
they are too-stories.
169
00:10:23,440 --> 00:10:25,640
Well, that's what TV is all about.
170
00:10:25,920 --> 00:10:28,000
Now, of course,
we'd have to fictionalize somewhat.
171
00:10:28,120 --> 00:10:30,080
Ain't no need to do that. Mister.
172
00:10:30,200 --> 00:10:32,120
Tyler's already done it.
173
00:10:33,840 --> 00:10:36,800
That all sounds all right.
That sounds fine.
174
00:10:37,280 --> 00:10:39,880
Um, as long as it's fair,
and you'd take care of my family.
175
00:10:39,960 --> 00:10:41,680
Oh, I don't think
that'll be a problem.
176
00:10:41,800 --> 00:10:44,760
Wow, Grandpa T.,
you're gonna be famous.
177
00:10:44,880 --> 00:10:47,600
Well, I'll tell you right now.
It don't matter who plays him.
178
00:10:47,920 --> 00:10:50,520
Nobody in his right mind's
gonna watch it.
179
00:10:50,880 --> 00:10:53,320
You gonna make book on that,
are you, Sheriff?
180
00:10:53,440 --> 00:10:55,360
What kind of odds you givin'?
181
00:10:55,560 --> 00:10:57,360
- Here we go.
- The sheriff s the local bookie?
182
00:10:57,480 --> 00:10:59,280
Ah, he's more like our local
cynic, I think.
183
00:10:59,400 --> 00:11:00,520
It comes with the job.
184
00:11:00,640 --> 00:11:02,600
The badge doesn't pay enough
for a man to live on.
185
00:11:02,720 --> 00:11:05,360
- The West has always been like that.
- Well, you're right.
186
00:11:05,480 --> 00:11:08,160
Wyatt Earp was a gambler
while he wore the star.
187
00:11:09,120 --> 00:11:12,120
Okay, Mr. Means.
Do we have a deal?
188
00:11:17,480 --> 00:11:19,040
All right. Yeah.
189
00:11:19,400 --> 00:11:21,440
Then we've got ourselves
a television series.
190
00:11:21,520 --> 00:11:22,600
Yeah.
191
00:11:22,720 --> 00:11:26,240
And the pilot will be the story
about how you cleaned up this town.
192
00:11:26,360 --> 00:11:27,640
Oh, uh... Well, uh...
193
00:11:27,760 --> 00:11:29,880
Sam. Sam.
You've got to get out of town.
194
00:11:30,000 --> 00:11:33,080
- What?
- Oh, it's a great way to start the series.
195
00:11:33,200 --> 00:11:35,320
We got to talk.
Now meet me outside.
196
00:11:35,880 --> 00:11:39,480
I'd like to start right away. We can clear
up some of the background while you eat.
197
00:11:39,600 --> 00:11:41,480
Yeah, listen, uh, tell you what.
198
00:11:41,600 --> 00:11:44,760
Could we, uh, maybe do that a little bit
later, all right? I gotta go right now,
199
00:11:44,880 --> 00:11:47,160
- if you'll excuse me and go take a nap.
- A-A nap?
200
00:11:47,280 --> 00:11:50,240
Yeah. When you get to be my age,
you gotta store energy, and sometimes...
201
00:11:50,330 --> 00:11:51,520
Are you feeling okay?
202
00:11:51,560 --> 00:11:52,920
Oh, I'm fine.
I'll see you later.
203
00:11:52,950 --> 00:11:54,920
- I think I've had enough too, Mom.
- No, no.
204
00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:56,760
You come sit down.
Finish your lunch.
205
00:11:56,880 --> 00:11:58,720
Hey! You look familiar.
206
00:12:00,200 --> 00:12:02,120
Didn't you come out on {\i1}Bonanza?{\i0}
207
00:12:03,800 --> 00:12:05,040
That was Hoss.
208
00:12:05,160 --> 00:12:07,760
Oh, Sam, I just saw
that guy from {\i1}Bonanza.{\i0}
209
00:12:07,840 --> 00:12:08,810
What?
210
00:12:08,840 --> 00:12:10,840
Yeah. He's drivin' that pair of...
pair...
211
00:12:10,960 --> 00:12:12,840
pair... pair...
212
00:12:12,920 --> 00:12:14,720
There, now, that's a pair!
213
00:12:14,840 --> 00:12:16,120
Ay-yi-yi.
214
00:12:16,240 --> 00:12:17,220
Al?
215
00:12:17,520 --> 00:12:19,360
What? Huh? Oh! Oh, listen...
216
00:12:19,480 --> 00:12:21,960
Listen. I've been talkin' to you
in the waiting...
217
00:12:22,080 --> 00:12:25,680
Uh, to-to Tyler, the guy you leaped
into, in the waiting room.
218
00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:29,080
And Ziggy rates the chances
of this guy telling a straight story...
219
00:12:29,160 --> 00:12:31,880
at 16% or less.
220
00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:34,360
I don't think the guy
knows what really happened.
221
00:12:34,440 --> 00:12:37,440
He-He spins yarns,
and he likes to be the hero.
222
00:12:37,560 --> 00:12:40,680
So, he likes to tell stories. What's
that have to do with me leaving town?
223
00:12:40,800 --> 00:12:42,680
- Tomorrow, at high noon...
- Yeah?
224
00:12:42,800 --> 00:12:45,880
- You get killed in a shootout.
- In a shootout?
225
00:12:45,960 --> 00:12:48,720
Yes. You got to be kidding me.
Who would want to shoot me?
226
00:12:48,920 --> 00:12:50,440
- Well, I-I...
- {\i1}Me.{\i0}
227
00:12:54,320 --> 00:12:56,400
Oh, boy.
228
00:13:08,360 --> 00:13:09,920
T?
229
00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:13,480
I don t know what's gotten into you.
But you shouldn't have just left...
230
00:13:13,600 --> 00:13:16,800
- Mr. Steiner hangin' there like that.
- I just needed to get some air.
231
00:13:16,880 --> 00:13:18,680
I'll give you some air.
232
00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:23,120
Uh, be cool, Sam.
Nothing happens until tomorrow.
233
00:13:23,240 --> 00:13:25,600
Russ, don't just stand there.
Arrest him!
234
00:13:25,880 --> 00:13:27,640
It's a centennial play.
235
00:13:27,760 --> 00:13:29,840
I'm kind of curious to see
where this is goin'.
236
00:13:29,960 --> 00:13:33,320
Pardon me, ma'am, for distressin' you.
My business is with this...
237
00:13:33,800 --> 00:13:36,160
lyin', double-faced cardsharp.
238
00:13:36,280 --> 00:13:38,240
I think he's talkin'
about you, Sam.
239
00:13:39,960 --> 00:13:42,880
So you killed the Claggett boys,
did you?
240
00:13:45,400 --> 00:13:49,760
Uh, yeah, I-I think so. Yeah.
241
00:13:49,920 --> 00:13:53,160
The mistake you made, mister,
was in assuming I was dead.
242
00:13:53,240 --> 00:13:55,160
I'm alive, Tyler.
243
00:13:56,080 --> 00:13:58,000
Outlivin' you is gonna be easy.
244
00:13:58,080 --> 00:14:00,960
I'm sorry. Um...
245
00:14:02,200 --> 00:14:06,400
I'm not quite getting
what's going on here.
246
00:14:06,480 --> 00:14:09,400
Uh, I'm Ben Steiner.
And you are?
247
00:14:10,640 --> 00:14:12,240
Tell him.
248
00:14:12,920 --> 00:14:14,440
Tell all of 'em.
249
00:14:14,640 --> 00:14:17,240
Yeah, Ziggy says there's a 96%
chance this is your old partner,
250
00:14:17,360 --> 00:14:18,840
uh, Pat Knight.
251
00:14:19,280 --> 00:14:21,120
This is, uh...
252
00:14:22,320 --> 00:14:26,200
- Pat Knight.
- Kinda like seein' Lazarus, isn't it?
253
00:14:26,480 --> 00:14:28,720
This guy's killed more
men than Clint Eastwood.
254
00:14:28,840 --> 00:14:30,560
It's a pleasure to meet
you, Mr. Knight.
255
00:14:30,640 --> 00:14:33,840
But I would appreciate it
if you would just put your gun away...
256
00:14:34,160 --> 00:14:35,680
and-and leave.
257
00:14:35,800 --> 00:14:37,960
I didn't come here to leave.
258
00:14:38,600 --> 00:14:40,760
Of course not.
You come here for the centennial,
259
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:42,840
He knows why I'm here.
260
00:14:44,520 --> 00:14:46,720
Tomorrow there's
gonna be a reckoning.
261
00:14:48,040 --> 00:14:51,440
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I need to see about a room and a...
262
00:14:52,400 --> 00:14:53,840
bath.
263
00:14:54,400 --> 00:14:56,040
Ma'am.
264
00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:05,200
Well, now,
265
00:15:05,560 --> 00:15:09,160
looks like our local hero's
been called out for real.
266
00:15:09,720 --> 00:15:11,640
Wonder what's
he gonna do about it.
267
00:15:11,880 --> 00:15:13,680
What's it all about, Tyler?
268
00:15:14,120 --> 00:15:17,920
Uh, it's just a kind of
a little misunderstanding is all.
269
00:15:18,160 --> 00:15:19,800
Uh, Mr. Means.
270
00:15:19,920 --> 00:15:21,840
I hate to say this,
but I've got a network...
271
00:15:21,960 --> 00:15:23,840
and an awful lot of money
riding on you.
272
00:15:23,960 --> 00:15:27,080
Does this have something to do with
your story in the {\i1}Reader's Digest?{\i0}
273
00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:29,360
Oh, Sam, uh,
in the original history,
274
00:15:29,480 --> 00:15:31,160
you get killed
before you make the deal,
275
00:15:31,280 --> 00:15:33,400
and that leaves Lucy and Steve
in a big jam.
276
00:15:33,520 --> 00:15:36,000
So I think you better talk
about this a little bit.
277
00:15:36,080 --> 00:15:37,760
Get away from here
and talk about it.
278
00:15:37,880 --> 00:15:39,160
I think, Mr. Steiner,
279
00:15:39,280 --> 00:15:42,040
if you just go ahead and have your
business people draw up the contracts,
280
00:15:42,320 --> 00:15:45,320
I will take care
of any little misunderstandings.
281
00:15:45,560 --> 00:15:48,440
Yeah, Grandpa T! Bam, bam, bam!
282
00:15:48,520 --> 00:15:49,720
Shhh.
283
00:15:49,800 --> 00:15:52,160
Yeah. I tell you what.
I'll lay 3-to-1 odds...
284
00:15:52,280 --> 00:15:56,480
Tyler either crawfishes or Pat
Knight shoots him deader'n a dog.
285
00:15:56,600 --> 00:15:59,760
- No way. I'll take a little piece of that.
- Let's make it 4-to-1.
286
00:15:59,880 --> 00:16:03,640
There's not gonna be any shooting.
Guns don't solve anything.
287
00:16:03,920 --> 00:16:06,560
Unless you're the last man standing.
288
00:16:07,160 --> 00:16:08,640
Sorry.
289
00:16:08,920 --> 00:16:10,840
Now if you'll excuse me.
290
00:16:11,240 --> 00:16:14,000
Gentlemen, I'm gonna go home
and get some rest.
291
00:16:15,200 --> 00:16:18,920
If I were you, Sheriff,
I wouldn't bet on any fight happening.
292
00:16:26,800 --> 00:16:29,960
So what is this Tyler guy sayin'
anyway back in the waiting room?
293
00:16:30,040 --> 00:16:33,400
Hm, he says he wants a drink,
and he wants another physical.
294
00:16:33,480 --> 00:16:36,040
- Another?
- He likes the nurses.
295
00:16:36,160 --> 00:16:38,160
- Ohh.
- Outside of that, nothing.
296
00:16:38,280 --> 00:16:40,520
Do you have anything more
on Stevie and Lucy?
297
00:16:40,640 --> 00:16:43,480
No, just... just what I said before...
it's tough times.
298
00:16:43,600 --> 00:16:46,160
Uh, Lucy's having trouble
making ends meet now.
299
00:16:46,280 --> 00:16:49,680
And when you get killed,
the TV deal gets canceled.
300
00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:53,280
And Stevie grows up,
runs away from home and becomes a hood.
301
00:16:53,400 --> 00:16:55,720
Spends the rest of his life
in and out of jail.
302
00:16:55,800 --> 00:16:57,440
Well, where's his
father in all of this?
303
00:16:57,520 --> 00:16:58,600
Uh...
304
00:16:58,720 --> 00:17:00,800
Peter Means is his father's name,
305
00:17:00,880 --> 00:17:02,960
and he was killed in action
in World War II.
306
00:17:03,080 --> 00:17:05,280
So then,
I'm-I'm his only father image.
307
00:17:05,400 --> 00:17:07,120
- Yeah.
- And he's counting on me...
308
00:17:07,200 --> 00:17:09,520
to be the hero that
I always told him I was,
309
00:17:10,000 --> 00:17:11,840
but when I'm not then...
310
00:17:11,960 --> 00:17:15,800
Then the bubble burst,
and he lashed out on his own.
311
00:17:15,960 --> 00:17:19,680
That sounds kind of simple,
but you get the gist of it.
312
00:17:19,800 --> 00:17:22,880
All right. So what am I supposed to do?
Am I supposed to kill Pat Knight?
313
00:17:23,120 --> 00:17:26,920
- Can I have his gun when you shoot him?
- Stevie, don't talk like that.
314
00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:28,720
Now, go wash up for dinner.
Go on.
315
00:17:28,840 --> 00:17:30,480
Aw, Mom.
316
00:17:35,120 --> 00:17:36,800
- T?
- Hmm?
317
00:17:36,920 --> 00:17:38,520
What's going on?
318
00:17:39,160 --> 00:17:43,600
- Nothin'. I was just talking to myself.
- About killing Pat Knight?
319
00:17:43,840 --> 00:17:45,600
Nobody's gonna kill anybody.
320
00:17:45,680 --> 00:17:47,880
Well. Then,
why are you even talking about it?
321
00:17:48,040 --> 00:17:51,360
Because I was remembering
a-a story...
322
00:17:51,480 --> 00:17:54,880
a time when I used to ride
with Pat, you know, and-and...
323
00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:59,000
And somebody came up to me
and offered me money to kill him,
324
00:17:59,240 --> 00:18:02,320
- but I turned him down.
- Ooh, Sam, that's pretty good.
325
00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:05,000
I don't remember
you telling me that story...
326
00:18:05,120 --> 00:18:07,120
or even talking about him.
327
00:18:07,280 --> 00:18:11,640
Well, there are a lot of things
I haven't... told you about.
328
00:18:11,880 --> 00:18:14,160
- I bet there are.
- Mmm.
329
00:18:14,840 --> 00:18:18,640
But, T., this-this man,
he wasn't kidding around.
330
00:18:18,760 --> 00:18:21,400
Lucy, please.
331
00:18:21,520 --> 00:18:23,520
I'm gonna be okay.
I won't do anything foolish.
332
00:18:23,640 --> 00:18:27,080
Good. 'Cause I couldn't stand
it if something happened to you.
333
00:18:27,160 --> 00:18:30,120
I swear to you.
I won't let you and Stevie down.
334
00:18:31,040 --> 00:18:33,880
T., you always say that,
but it never happens.
335
00:18:34,840 --> 00:18:38,040
Like when this Mr. Steiner showed up
and offered to pay you for your stories,
336
00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:40,960
I thought,
"Now we can send Stevie to college.
337
00:18:41,080 --> 00:18:44,120
"He can... He can be somebody
when he grows up."
338
00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:46,480
But now...
339
00:18:48,400 --> 00:18:51,000
I have a bad feeling about all this.
340
00:18:56,240 --> 00:18:58,160
You gonna change before dinner?
341
00:18:58,400 --> 00:19:00,800
- Yeah, in a minute.
- Okay.
342
00:19:09,520 --> 00:19:12,240
- Where are you going?
- I'm gonna settle this once and for all.
343
00:19:12,360 --> 00:19:14,000
You said in a minute.
344
00:19:28,360 --> 00:19:29,920
About time there, Tyler.
345
00:19:30,040 --> 00:19:32,640
I was afraid you weren't
gonna stop by this evening.
346
00:19:35,040 --> 00:19:37,080
Thanks.
I'm still not drinking.
347
00:19:38,200 --> 00:19:40,720
Runnin' out of spending money, Tyler?
348
00:19:41,200 --> 00:19:42,720
Evenin'.
349
00:19:43,920 --> 00:19:45,960
Be happy to buy you a drink.
350
00:19:46,920 --> 00:19:49,640
Just make sure you pay me back
before noon.
351
00:19:50,440 --> 00:19:52,040
Mr. Means.
352
00:19:52,440 --> 00:19:55,720
Mr. Knight has been telling me
some very interesting stories.
353
00:19:56,360 --> 00:19:57,960
Wish I could have been here.
354
00:19:58,080 --> 00:20:00,960
Yeah, that way, we'd all know
what we're talking about.
355
00:20:01,280 --> 00:20:04,200
{\i1}Mr. Steiner,
long distance phone call for you.{\i0}
356
00:20:04,280 --> 00:20:06,680
{\i1}It's from, uh,
Hollywood in California.{\i0}
357
00:20:06,800 --> 00:20:08,320
I'll take it in my room.
358
00:20:10,240 --> 00:20:12,000
Gentlemen.
359
00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:22,520
I don't recall
askin' you to join me.
360
00:20:24,200 --> 00:20:26,320
Look, Pat.
361
00:20:27,880 --> 00:20:32,040
I gotta be honest here. My mind's
not as good as it used to be, so I...
362
00:20:32,440 --> 00:20:35,760
I don't remember why you're here.
363
00:20:39,480 --> 00:20:42,120
Uh-uh. Not this time.
364
00:20:44,040 --> 00:20:46,080
I can see it in your eyes.
365
00:20:46,200 --> 00:20:48,760
You know exactly why I'm here.
366
00:20:49,800 --> 00:20:52,120
We're gonna settle it
at noon tomorrow.
367
00:20:52,480 --> 00:20:56,440
Look, whatever I did...
whatever happened... okay?
368
00:20:56,560 --> 00:21:00,360
I'm sorry, okay?
Uh, I'm sorry.
369
00:21:00,440 --> 00:21:03,880
That mean you're gonna give up
the TV deal too?
370
00:21:04,480 --> 00:21:06,240
What would I do that for?
371
00:21:09,240 --> 00:21:11,200
You haven't changed a bit.
372
00:21:12,240 --> 00:21:13,960
No, no, you...
You don't understand.
373
00:21:14,080 --> 00:21:16,200
I'm not interested
in the TV deal for myself.
374
00:21:16,320 --> 00:21:19,720
See, the TV deal
is for Lucy and Stevie.
375
00:21:20,000 --> 00:21:21,920
You know,
so he can go to college.
376
00:21:24,560 --> 00:21:27,960
- Remember that night in Abilene?
- Abilene.
377
00:21:28,080 --> 00:21:29,920
Uh, Abilene.
378
00:21:30,040 --> 00:21:31,680
I'm...
I'm a little hazy on that.
379
00:21:31,800 --> 00:21:35,240
- Uh, no. Nada. Zip. Zilch.
- Patience, that was her name.
380
00:21:35,360 --> 00:21:36,760
Patience.
381
00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:38,960
And she was anything but.
382
00:21:39,440 --> 00:21:41,960
You and I almost drew
down on each other then,
383
00:21:42,920 --> 00:21:46,080
but we settled it another way.
384
00:21:46,200 --> 00:21:50,000
And I'm glad we did.
I am very glad that we did.
385
00:21:53,920 --> 00:21:55,760
Once partners,
386
00:21:56,710 --> 00:21:58,070
always partners.
387
00:21:58,120 --> 00:22:00,840
Once partners, always partners.
388
00:22:03,640 --> 00:22:05,920
Last man standing is the winner.
389
00:22:08,120 --> 00:22:09,800
You better do it.
You better do it.
390
00:22:09,920 --> 00:22:11,880
Uh, it's better than swapping lead.
391
00:22:16,680 --> 00:22:18,320
To Patience.
392
00:22:30,920 --> 00:22:33,680
And then,
what about that bank...
393
00:22:33,800 --> 00:22:36,440
They hired us to guard
up in... Hoffberg.
394
00:22:36,520 --> 00:22:38,520
- Hoffberg? That was great.
- Yeah.
395
00:22:38,640 --> 00:22:41,080
We stole all them sacks
of gold dust...
396
00:22:41,200 --> 00:22:43,400
and found out
they were filled with sand!
397
00:22:43,520 --> 00:22:45,760
That was great.
398
00:22:46,160 --> 00:22:50,120
Too bad...
Too bad if I'd had to kill all them folks.
399
00:22:50,200 --> 00:22:52,520
Uh, yeah.
400
00:22:53,880 --> 00:22:57,040
Hey. Hey, how about that time when...
401
00:22:57,160 --> 00:23:01,240
When we stole those horses from
that guy with the cute daughters?
402
00:23:01,360 --> 00:23:03,680
I don't know... I don't know...
403
00:23:04,040 --> 00:23:07,800
what tired us out more
ridin'... wh-which one.
404
00:23:07,920 --> 00:23:10,600
Sam, what are you talking about?
405
00:23:11,240 --> 00:23:12,840
Wait a minute.
406
00:23:13,960 --> 00:23:16,760
I... I don't remember no daughters.
407
00:23:21,240 --> 00:23:23,360
Maybe I saw that in a movie
or somethin'.
408
00:23:24,280 --> 00:23:25,720
Yeah.
409
00:23:28,280 --> 00:23:30,000
Ooh, whoo-whoo-whoo.
410
00:23:30,080 --> 00:23:31,840
- You know, Ty?
- Mm?
411
00:23:33,560 --> 00:23:36,520
I sure am gonna hate havin' to kill you.
412
00:23:39,200 --> 00:23:41,080
Well, I tell you, why don't we...
413
00:23:41,320 --> 00:23:43,560
why don't we have another drink
and just forget the whole thing?
414
00:23:43,680 --> 00:23:47,720
- Just forget it right now.
- Oh, no. I can't do that.
415
00:23:47,760 --> 00:23:50,800
- Mm-hmm.
- Gotta uphold my honor.
416
00:23:53,320 --> 00:23:57,520
Besides,
I've got a side bet with the sheriff...
417
00:23:57,640 --> 00:23:59,680
on which way you're gonna fall.
418
00:24:01,320 --> 00:24:03,160
I'm sayin' face up.
419
00:24:03,440 --> 00:24:06,120
That, of course,
is assuming you can hit me.
420
00:24:09,800 --> 00:24:12,080
- Hey, what the...
- Hey!
421
00:24:18,240 --> 00:24:20,080
I reckon I can do that.
422
00:24:24,360 --> 00:24:28,760
Har-har. You'll have to walk
the plank if you're...
423
00:24:34,720 --> 00:24:39,440
Sam, you are gonna be
a mess in the morning.
424
00:24:39,520 --> 00:24:42,320
- And probably a dead mess.
- Quiet.
425
00:24:42,600 --> 00:24:44,700
- Nobody's gonna get killed.
- Shh, shh, shh.
426
00:24:44,750 --> 00:24:46,520
You're gonna shoot him,
though, aren't you?
427
00:24:46,640 --> 00:24:48,360
Ohh, boy.
428
00:24:49,280 --> 00:24:53,760
Stevie, there's a hole right there.
429
00:24:53,810 --> 00:24:55,030
Watch that hole.
430
00:24:55,200 --> 00:24:56,560
Stevie.
431
00:24:57,960 --> 00:25:00,720
This isn't a game that we're
talkin' about, you know.
432
00:25:01,440 --> 00:25:04,120
You know, guns kill people.
433
00:25:05,960 --> 00:25:08,080
You're not afraid
to face him, are you?
434
00:25:08,200 --> 00:25:10,840
Afraid to...
Yeah, I'm afraid to face him.
435
00:25:11,360 --> 00:25:14,360
Anybody who says they're not afraid
to stand in front of a loaded gun...
436
00:25:14,480 --> 00:25:17,040
is either crazy or stupid or
suicidal or nuts or out of their...
437
00:25:17,120 --> 00:25:18,920
But we can't back down.
438
00:25:19,520 --> 00:25:22,880
Everybody'll make fun of us.
And...
439
00:25:24,160 --> 00:25:27,400
An-An-And the kids'll go back
to teasin' me all over again.
440
00:25:27,520 --> 00:25:29,480
Oh, wait a second.
Wait a second.
441
00:25:29,600 --> 00:25:31,640
Sit down here.
Sit down.
442
00:25:32,960 --> 00:25:34,520
Now listen to me.
443
00:25:34,960 --> 00:25:38,560
I know this may sound corny
to you probably, but...
444
00:25:40,440 --> 00:25:42,440
life is precious.
445
00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:45,040
And, you see, once you're dead,
446
00:25:45,240 --> 00:25:47,680
you're... dead.
447
00:25:48,320 --> 00:25:50,480
But everybody's gonna laugh at us.
448
00:25:51,920 --> 00:25:54,520
Th... They're gonna say
you're just a drunk.
449
00:25:59,040 --> 00:26:03,240
It doesn't really matter
what other people do or say.
450
00:26:04,160 --> 00:26:09,480
What matters
is what you know in here...
451
00:26:10,080 --> 00:26:13,400
about yourself and about others.
452
00:26:14,120 --> 00:26:17,600
Because the most important person
you have to listen to...
453
00:26:17,840 --> 00:26:19,480
is you.
454
00:26:20,210 --> 00:26:21,560
Right?
455
00:26:23,320 --> 00:26:24,560
I... I guess so.
456
00:26:24,680 --> 00:26:26,360
Well, you guess right.
457
00:26:27,310 --> 00:26:29,790
So come on, come on. Give your ol'
grandpa a kiss good night. Huh?
458
00:26:29,840 --> 00:26:31,120
Okay.
459
00:26:31,280 --> 00:26:34,520
Now get some sleep, 'cause it's late.
I'm sure of it.
460
00:26:34,640 --> 00:26:38,200
- Okeydokey.
- Okay. Sleep tight.
461
00:26:39,720 --> 00:26:40,860
Whew!
462
00:26:40,920 --> 00:26:42,960
A lot of pride in that boy.
463
00:26:43,640 --> 00:26:46,400
Yeah, well, there's a lot of pride
in Pat Knight too.
464
00:26:46,520 --> 00:26:48,480
You know, Sam, uh,
465
00:26:48,680 --> 00:26:51,480
it might not be a bad idea
for you to, uh,
466
00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:54,920
familiarize yourself with Tyler's gun.
467
00:26:55,120 --> 00:26:56,520
No.
468
00:26:56,640 --> 00:26:58,400
- No?
- No, don't you see?
469
00:26:58,480 --> 00:27:00,520
There aren't gonna be any gunfights.
470
00:27:00,600 --> 00:27:02,160
- See, I got it all figured out.
- Wh...
471
00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:05,440
Listen to this.
I'm gonna get him thrown in jail, see?
472
00:27:05,560 --> 00:27:08,480
That way, there...
there won't be any gunfights.
473
00:27:08,600 --> 00:27:10,080
- No gunfights.
- Yeah.
474
00:27:10,200 --> 00:27:12,640
- No.
- You still get killed tomorrow.
475
00:27:13,800 --> 00:27:17,240
But, you know,
it only takes one guy...
476
00:27:17,360 --> 00:27:19,280
to decide to have a gunfight.
477
00:27:19,600 --> 00:27:22,440
In the Old West,
they were really ambushes.
478
00:27:22,560 --> 00:27:25,920
- Ambushes?
- Yeah, in the back kind of stuff.
479
00:27:26,440 --> 00:27:28,120
Ambushes?
480
00:27:28,380 --> 00:27:29,450
Yeah, ambushes.
481
00:27:29,480 --> 00:27:30,740
I better see if there are
some bullets in the house.
482
00:27:30,780 --> 00:27:32,880
- I didn't think... Ambushes.
- All right, fine.
483
00:27:38,800 --> 00:27:42,040
Now, are we in
the head-pounding stage...
484
00:27:42,160 --> 00:27:45,960
or in the spinning,
rising waves of nausea?
485
00:27:46,200 --> 00:27:48,400
- Hmm?
- Take your pick.
486
00:27:48,520 --> 00:27:51,880
- That's impressive.
- Yeah, I just...
487
00:27:52,400 --> 00:27:55,160
hope that Pat Knight
feels worse than I do.
488
00:27:56,520 --> 00:27:57,960
Oh, my gosh.
489
00:27:58,080 --> 00:28:00,560
Don't tell me you were a gunslinger
in the navy.
490
00:28:00,720 --> 00:28:02,640
Well, back in the old days,
491
00:28:03,280 --> 00:28:05,400
they were called
"gunfighters" or "pistoleros';...
492
00:28:05,520 --> 00:28:07,800
- or, uh, "shootists."
- Mm-hmm.
493
00:28:07,920 --> 00:28:12,720
And I had the best quick-draw artist
in America teach me.
494
00:28:12,840 --> 00:28:15,240
- Really?
- Yes, really.
495
00:28:15,640 --> 00:28:16,960
- Her name was...
- Her name...
496
00:28:17,080 --> 00:28:20,360
- Fifi "Boom-Boom" LaRue.
- Al.
497
00:28:20,480 --> 00:28:21,960
She was a stripper
in New Orleans.
498
00:28:22,040 --> 00:28:24,080
She had the finest
matched pair...
499
00:28:24,200 --> 00:28:25,440
Al!
500
00:28:25,680 --> 00:28:27,880
Matched pair of .44 pistols.
501
00:28:28,000 --> 00:28:31,040
She had 'em in little secret holsters...
real cute.
502
00:28:31,160 --> 00:28:34,280
It was part of her act.
But she could draw, lemme tell you.
503
00:28:34,400 --> 00:28:37,280
I know.
'Cause I studied her...
504
00:28:37,440 --> 00:28:39,160
- Yeah, I bet you...
- very closely.
505
00:28:39,280 --> 00:28:40,840
Yeah, I bet you did.
506
00:28:44,680 --> 00:28:46,440
- Now come with me.
- Wow!
507
00:28:46,620 --> 00:28:49,020
- You gotta learn this.
- Fifi taught you that?
508
00:28:49,070 --> 00:28:50,960
Yes.
She taught me a lot of stuff.
509
00:28:51,040 --> 00:28:52,870
- Wait a second. Wait-wait-wait...
- Now you're gonna learn.
510
00:28:52,900 --> 00:28:54,080
This is too close.
511
00:28:54,100 --> 00:28:55,320
Wait, wait, wait?
It's not too close!
512
00:28:55,350 --> 00:28:56,850
I wanna be back there.
It's farther back there.
513
00:28:56,910 --> 00:28:58,840
No-no-no. Fifteen to 20 feet,
that was normal for gunfighters.
514
00:28:58,960 --> 00:29:00,520
- Huh?
- Anything farther than that,
515
00:29:00,550 --> 00:29:01,720
that's just Hollywood.
516
00:29:01,840 --> 00:29:04,960
Now, line yourself up.
517
00:29:05,560 --> 00:29:08,640
No, face the target, Sam.
Turn this way. Face the...
518
00:29:08,720 --> 00:29:10,480
You're gonna shoot over
there, okay?
519
00:29:10,600 --> 00:29:11,720
Okay.
520
00:29:11,840 --> 00:29:13,720
Hang your hand down here,
nice and loose, loose, loose.
521
00:29:13,800 --> 00:29:16,480
You're gonna catch the hammer
of the gun with the inside of your thumb,
522
00:29:16,560 --> 00:29:19,920
and as you pull up,
you cock that sucker like that... Bang!
523
00:29:20,040 --> 00:29:22,160
- Okay, try it.
- Okay.
524
00:29:23,680 --> 00:29:26,280
Yeah. You almost got it.
Now try it again.
525
00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:31,480
Not bad. Not bad. But don't rush it.
Come on. Let's see you do it.
526
00:29:31,600 --> 00:29:34,720
You gotta catch the hammer with the inside
of your thumb as you're drawin' the gun up.
527
00:29:34,840 --> 00:29:38,080
Clear the holster,
and you're rea... That's it.
528
00:29:38,800 --> 00:29:40,020
Pull the trigger!
529
00:29:40,400 --> 00:29:42,000
Good!
Ay-yi-yi-yi-yi-yi-yi.
530
00:29:42,120 --> 00:29:43,840
"Ay-yi-yi'"?
That was a pretty good shot.
531
00:29:43,950 --> 00:29:46,160
I was aiming for the
one on the right. Shhh.
532
00:29:46,240 --> 00:29:49,240
Oh. Oh, well,
at least you're in the neighborhood.
533
00:29:50,640 --> 00:29:52,320
Al, this is impossi...
534
00:29:53,880 --> 00:29:56,120
Huh, huh, huh...
535
00:29:59,640 --> 00:30:03,840
Don't do to talk to yourself while you're
shootin'. Breaks your concentration.
536
00:30:04,080 --> 00:30:06,720
So much for him havin'
a hangover too.
537
00:30:06,960 --> 00:30:11,120
It's awful decent of you to give
your opposition shooting tips.
538
00:30:12,440 --> 00:30:14,560
What kind of opposition is that?
539
00:30:16,560 --> 00:30:19,800
I was just out takin' some air.
I heard the noise.
540
00:30:21,120 --> 00:30:23,760
You are pitiful, T.
541
00:30:23,880 --> 00:30:26,400
Look, Pat.
542
00:30:27,880 --> 00:30:31,360
You're better at this th-than, uh, I am.
We both know that.
543
00:30:32,160 --> 00:30:33,680
But doesn't it seem that...
544
00:30:33,800 --> 00:30:36,880
two reasonable men should
be able to figure out a solution...
545
00:30:37,000 --> 00:30:38,640
to all this without havin' to...
546
00:30:38,760 --> 00:30:41,320
Only one of us is reasonable.
The other's a liar.
547
00:30:41,800 --> 00:30:44,240
Look. I know you don't believe
me, but I don't know...
548
00:30:44,360 --> 00:30:46,360
what you're talking about.
549
00:30:50,720 --> 00:30:54,080
I was the one who walked out into the
street and fought the four Claggett boys...
550
00:30:54,200 --> 00:30:56,880
face-to-face
and shot 'em all... dead.
551
00:30:57,960 --> 00:30:59,320
Not you.
552
00:31:01,240 --> 00:31:04,400
Well, I guess Tyler
omitted that from his article.
553
00:31:04,880 --> 00:31:08,720
Look. I can understand
now why you're so angry at me,
554
00:31:08,840 --> 00:31:11,800
what... what with the article
and-and all.
555
00:31:11,920 --> 00:31:13,840
Angry doesn't begin
to describe it.
556
00:31:13,920 --> 00:31:18,080
No man likes to have his reputation
bushwhacked... by his partner.
557
00:31:18,640 --> 00:31:21,240
Oh, hey! Maybe...
Maybe he ambushed the Claggetts.
558
00:31:21,360 --> 00:31:23,160
- Try that.
- Wait a second.
559
00:31:24,840 --> 00:31:28,560
I was just thinkin' that maybe...
560
00:31:29,240 --> 00:31:31,320
- Ambush...
- Wait, I remember.
561
00:31:31,720 --> 00:31:35,720
You ambushed a couple
of the Claggett boys, didn't ya?
562
00:31:35,960 --> 00:31:38,440
I caught Elwyn
comin' off his horse.
563
00:31:38,920 --> 00:31:41,320
But Wendell had a gun
when he came out of that outhouse.
564
00:31:41,440 --> 00:31:44,360
And Jonah and Jamie,
I faced-off fair and square.
565
00:31:44,420 --> 00:31:46,560
- Yeah, with a little help from you.
- With a little help from me.
566
00:31:47,080 --> 00:31:49,040
All you ever did
was make 'em duck.
567
00:31:49,120 --> 00:31:53,680
Yeah, but the point is,
you didn't do it alone... or face-to-face.
568
00:31:54,160 --> 00:31:57,640
You bent your story,
same way I did.
569
00:31:57,720 --> 00:31:59,560
It-It's not so terrible.
570
00:31:59,680 --> 00:32:02,400
I didn't bend my story.
You outright lied.
571
00:32:02,520 --> 00:32:04,480
You said you did it alone.
572
00:32:08,840 --> 00:32:12,640
Yeah, well, if you wanted to be such a
big hero, why didn't you stick around?
573
00:32:14,000 --> 00:32:15,640
Good one.
574
00:32:18,160 --> 00:32:19,800
You know why?
575
00:32:21,040 --> 00:32:24,920
Someone had to ride out to the Claggett
place and break the news to Ruthie.
576
00:32:25,040 --> 00:32:26,560
Ruthie?
577
00:32:26,880 --> 00:32:30,320
Someone had to...
comfort that poor girl.
578
00:32:30,730 --> 00:32:33,440
Ruthie Claggett, younger sister of
the Claggett boys... Ruthie.
579
00:32:33,600 --> 00:32:37,040
Must've been some comforting,
considering that you never came back.
580
00:32:37,960 --> 00:32:41,400
Well, let's just say
it took longer than I expected.
581
00:32:41,520 --> 00:32:43,240
Oh, that sounds like
an interesting story.
582
00:32:43,360 --> 00:32:44,840
Look, Pat.
583
00:32:45,400 --> 00:32:49,040
If I change my story now,
I'll lose everything.
584
00:32:49,160 --> 00:32:51,960
You made the problem, mister,
and it's up to you to make it right.
585
00:32:52,080 --> 00:32:55,360
Yeah, but the only thing
that's at stake here is-is your pride.
586
00:32:55,480 --> 00:33:00,040
Now you can't believe that it's worth
killin' somebody over a matter of pride.
587
00:33:00,400 --> 00:33:03,280
What the hell else
did we ever have?
588
00:33:08,000 --> 00:33:10,960
I think we'd better
get some more bottles and...
589
00:33:11,920 --> 00:33:13,920
work on your fast draw.
590
00:33:16,680 --> 00:33:20,080
I'm not gonna go out there
and play his stupid game, Al.
591
00:33:20,160 --> 00:33:23,040
Well, you gotta do something.
We're running out of time.
592
00:33:23,400 --> 00:33:25,840
You're not gonna run away,
are you, Grandpa?
593
00:33:29,920 --> 00:33:33,280
Look, Stevie, in the Old West,
594
00:33:33,400 --> 00:33:37,680
when there were few laws
and even fewer lawmen,
595
00:33:38,080 --> 00:33:40,520
people wore guns
as-as part of their wardrobe.
596
00:33:40,640 --> 00:33:43,960
They used them to defend themselves.
But not anymore.
597
00:33:44,480 --> 00:33:47,560
Yeah, well, that's not what you said
before he came to town.
598
00:33:48,600 --> 00:33:50,680
Don't you remember
what we were talkin' about last night?
599
00:33:50,760 --> 00:33:52,760
Yeah, but a man doesn't quit!
600
00:33:52,880 --> 00:33:55,040
A man just doesn't run away!
601
00:33:57,440 --> 00:34:01,280
You see, you...
you always told me that.
602
00:34:02,480 --> 00:34:04,600
And now you're gonna run away.
603
00:34:05,640 --> 00:34:08,800
And the whole town's
gonna know you're just a coward.
604
00:34:20,160 --> 00:34:23,720
If Knight wants to kill me,
he's gonna have to do it in cold blood,
605
00:34:23,800 --> 00:34:25,640
because I'm not goin', Al.
606
00:34:25,760 --> 00:34:27,840
I am not goin'.
607
00:34:38,440 --> 00:34:40,960
Sam, sitting there isn't gonna do it.
608
00:34:41,040 --> 00:34:43,400
Ziggy says you still get killed.
609
00:34:43,840 --> 00:34:46,400
Okay, okay. Then maybe
I should do what Stevie said.
610
00:34:46,480 --> 00:34:48,360
Maybe I should just run away.
611
00:34:48,480 --> 00:34:50,920
Yeah. Bingo!
612
00:34:51,040 --> 00:34:52,840
- Sam, that's it.
- What?
613
00:34:52,960 --> 00:34:55,000
You run away.
You live to be 95,
614
00:34:55,080 --> 00:34:57,600
and you die of natural causes
in your sleep, peacefully.
615
00:34:57,720 --> 00:34:59,800
Great. Great. What about Stevie?
616
00:34:59,920 --> 00:35:02,960
Uh... Stevie...
Well, he still grows up.
617
00:35:03,080 --> 00:35:05,040
- Yeah.
- Uh, he runs away,
618
00:35:05,120 --> 00:35:08,160
and he still does
jail time like before.
619
00:35:08,320 --> 00:35:12,200
But it gets worse. He picks a
fight in some bar and gets killed.
620
00:35:12,320 --> 00:35:15,320
Al, I can't stand by and watch
this kid ruin his life, damn it!
621
00:35:15,440 --> 00:35:18,520
Well, it's better than committing
suicide facing off this guy Pat Knight.
622
00:35:18,600 --> 00:35:21,320
He could shoot your eyes out
before you blink.
623
00:35:23,640 --> 00:35:24,880
Could he?
624
00:35:25,000 --> 00:35:26,280
Huh?
What?
625
00:35:26,400 --> 00:35:27,840
- Outdraw me.
- Could...
626
00:35:28,000 --> 00:35:30,240
I mean,
the guy is 82 years old, right?
627
00:35:30,340 --> 00:35:34,110
Now, granted, he-he's more accurate
than I am, but, but my reflexes
628
00:35:34,170 --> 00:35:35,430
- have gotta be faster.
- Sam.
629
00:35:35,490 --> 00:35:37,440
My synapses have gotta be quicker,
because I'm 50 years younger!
630
00:35:37,470 --> 00:35:38,720
- Get real!
- What?
631
00:35:38,840 --> 00:35:41,200
Ziggy only gives
you a 17% chance...
632
00:35:41,320 --> 00:35:43,520
of drawing as fast as this guy.
633
00:35:43,800 --> 00:35:46,920
He's old, but he's still good.
634
00:36:00,360 --> 00:36:02,000
I'm gonna get my gun.
635
00:36:35,280 --> 00:36:38,720
Well, since I got some time to kill,
anybody interested in a hand?
636
00:36:59,520 --> 00:37:01,680
Aren't you going to do something?
637
00:37:03,200 --> 00:37:05,960
No law against playin' poker,
638
00:37:06,440 --> 00:37:09,080
even if you are
playin' by yourself.
639
00:37:22,920 --> 00:37:25,960
Morning, Stevie.
640
00:37:29,800 --> 00:37:31,720
My grandpa's not a liar.
641
00:37:35,960 --> 00:37:38,800
Kind of heavy,
the way it hangs there, isn't it?
642
00:37:43,120 --> 00:37:45,000
It's not that heavy.
643
00:37:45,400 --> 00:37:50,000
Sheriff.
Mr. Knight.
644
00:37:56,840 --> 00:37:59,200
- How old are you, son?
- Twelve.
645
00:37:59,720 --> 00:38:02,200
Bu-But I'm gonna be 13 in December.
646
00:38:05,520 --> 00:38:08,880
I was 15 before I killed my first man.
647
00:38:09,960 --> 00:38:14,600
But I guess, uh,
today you grow up faster.
648
00:38:17,560 --> 00:38:20,480
Al, have you seen my gun?
649
00:38:20,880 --> 00:38:22,400
What do you mean,
have I seen your gun?
650
00:38:22,520 --> 00:38:24,040
- I can't find my gun.
- Stevie?
651
00:38:24,160 --> 00:38:25,800
- You can't find your gun?
- Stevie?
652
00:38:25,920 --> 00:38:28,320
- Where did you leave it?
- T., have you seen Stevie?
653
00:38:28,420 --> 00:38:29,900
Uh-oh.
654
00:38:30,560 --> 00:38:33,320
- I gotta go to the saloon.
- You can't go to that fight!
655
00:38:33,440 --> 00:38:35,680
Sam, Stevie is gonna try and
quick draw with Pat Knight,
656
00:38:35,760 --> 00:38:37,200
and he's gonna get killed.
657
00:38:37,280 --> 00:38:39,000
If I don't go,
Stevie's gonna do it for me.
658
00:38:39,080 --> 00:38:40,760
- My Lord!
- Come on.
659
00:38:46,600 --> 00:38:49,240
Stevie, don't do anything stupid.
660
00:39:04,360 --> 00:39:06,920
Tell me, Stevie.
Your grandpa send you,
661
00:39:07,280 --> 00:39:10,360
- or did you come on your own?
- I came on my own.
662
00:39:13,720 --> 00:39:15,840
Got no quarrel with you, Stevie.
663
00:39:15,960 --> 00:39:18,160
You said you cleaned up the town.
664
00:39:18,960 --> 00:39:20,560
But you didn't.
665
00:39:22,240 --> 00:39:23,520
He did.
666
00:39:24,560 --> 00:39:27,360
No, Stevie. He didn't.
667
00:39:27,440 --> 00:39:29,160
Yes, he did!
668
00:39:30,640 --> 00:39:32,120
Stevie...
669
00:39:38,120 --> 00:39:42,640
You're on time.
Underdressed, as usual.
670
00:39:42,760 --> 00:39:44,560
Give me the gun, Stevie.
671
00:39:44,800 --> 00:39:46,840
No, no, no.
You're just going to run away again.
672
00:39:46,960 --> 00:39:49,080
No, I'm not.
Now, give me the gun.
673
00:39:57,160 --> 00:39:59,600
Now don't you think
there's been enough killing already?
674
00:40:00,480 --> 00:40:03,960
Easy to say when you're livin'
on another man's reputation.
675
00:40:06,440 --> 00:40:09,400
You just gonna hold that thing?
676
00:40:14,120 --> 00:40:16,720
Sam, this is completely loony.
677
00:40:17,520 --> 00:40:20,600
I guess sometimes you can't run away
from your fate, can you?
678
00:40:25,400 --> 00:40:29,440
Sometimes I guess you can't.
I'll be waiting.
679
00:40:30,070 --> 00:40:31,200
No!
680
00:40:31,280 --> 00:40:33,400
I'm not going to let you
get yourself killed!
681
00:40:33,880 --> 00:40:37,720
Tyler, I guess you'll be wantin' this.
682
00:41:14,720 --> 00:41:17,560
Uh, Sam, don't worry, okay?
683
00:41:17,680 --> 00:41:20,280
'Cause I-I'm gonna think of somethin'
clever to get you out of this.
684
00:41:20,400 --> 00:41:22,960
Mom, what's he doin'?
685
00:41:23,080 --> 00:41:25,760
Sometimes there isn't a clever way out.
686
00:41:26,440 --> 00:41:28,000
Praying, I hope.
687
00:41:28,120 --> 00:41:31,480
Uh...
See, I think you're too close.
688
00:41:31,600 --> 00:41:34,320
Anything closer than 20 yards,
and h-he can't miss.
689
00:41:34,400 --> 00:41:37,080
Anything over 20 feet,
and I don't stand a chance.
690
00:42:24,840 --> 00:42:27,560
Ladies and gents,
the drinks are on the house!
691
00:42:27,680 --> 00:42:29,720
Come over here.
Let me buy you a drink.
692
00:42:29,800 --> 00:42:34,400
How about a big round of applause
for our hero, Mr. Tyler Means!
693
00:42:38,600 --> 00:42:42,440
You did it. You sign the deal. Everything
turns out great for Lucy and Stevie.
694
00:42:43,000 --> 00:42:44,480
Great.
695
00:42:47,000 --> 00:42:48,720
Excuse me.
I'll be right back.
696
00:42:53,520 --> 00:42:57,800
You know, that didn't mean anything.
It did to them.
697
00:43:00,760 --> 00:43:02,720
Tell you what, uh...
698
00:43:03,400 --> 00:43:05,760
Give me... Give me a chance
to make it up to you, all right?
699
00:43:07,920 --> 00:43:11,320
Hey, Mr. Steiner,
come over here for a second, would ya?
700
00:43:11,840 --> 00:43:13,440
Listen, Mr. Steiner.
701
00:43:13,560 --> 00:43:17,040
I was wonderin' if maybe, uh...
maybe we could find...
702
00:43:17,160 --> 00:43:20,920
a consulting job or something
like that for Pat on my TV show.
703
00:43:21,200 --> 00:43:24,200
'Cause he would really help
me keep my memory fresh.
704
00:43:25,360 --> 00:43:27,880
Mr. Means, he just tried to kill you.
705
00:43:28,000 --> 00:43:29,440
I know that.
706
00:43:29,560 --> 00:43:32,200
But once partners,
always partners.
707
00:43:33,600 --> 00:43:35,160
Well, sure.
708
00:43:35,200 --> 00:43:36,880
- All right. Why not?
- All right.
709
00:43:36,960 --> 00:43:39,560
- Get ready to leap, partner.
- Hey, wait a second.
710
00:43:39,600 --> 00:43:42,240
Maybe we could
give him a part in the show.
711
00:43:43,440 --> 00:43:45,680
In the show?
Yeah, isn't that a good idea?
712
00:43:46,720 --> 00:43:48,560
You got a problem with that?
713
00:44:07,640 --> 00:44:11,240
Oh, God. They love us!
'Cause we're bad, girlfriend!
714
00:44:11,320 --> 00:44:13,640
They want an encore.
What are we gonna do, Cherea?
715
00:44:13,670 --> 00:44:15,760
- Let's go! Let's go! Let's go do it!
- We don't have any more songs.
716
00:44:15,800 --> 00:44:18,840
- Just do a reprise. Come on. Cherea!
- No, no. I don't... I don't...
717
00:44:18,920 --> 00:44:21,120
- Let's go!
- Oh, boy!
53873
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