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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: s1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 3 00:02:01,867 --> 00:02:04,000 We need to call it, right? 4 00:02:06,134 --> 00:02:07,268 I think so too. 5 00:02:22,534 --> 00:02:24,201 -Hey. Hey, hey. -What? 6 00:02:27,034 --> 00:02:27,867 Hey. 7 00:02:28,601 --> 00:02:30,065 They're sleeping. 8 00:02:30,067 --> 00:02:32,098 I know. Do you think that-- 9 00:02:32,100 --> 00:02:33,465 Should I pack a bag and check into a hotel? 10 00:02:33,467 --> 00:02:34,898 No, no. That's dramatic. What? 11 00:02:34,900 --> 00:02:36,831 No, I know, just with the... 12 00:02:36,833 --> 00:02:38,132 -Or I could-- -What? 13 00:02:38,134 --> 00:02:39,532 I could make up a bed down on the couch too, 14 00:02:39,534 --> 00:02:41,432 -if that's gonna be... -No, no, no. 15 00:02:41,434 --> 00:02:42,465 -Really? -That's not necessary. 16 00:02:42,467 --> 00:02:43,865 Let's just... 17 00:02:43,867 --> 00:02:45,432 -Okay, what-- -Oh... 18 00:02:45,434 --> 00:02:47,432 -Hey, buddy, -TESS: Hey. Hey, buddy. 19 00:02:47,434 --> 00:02:49,567 -What are you doing up? -Are you guys fighting? 20 00:02:50,034 --> 00:02:51,434 -No. -No. No, no, no. 21 00:02:52,235 --> 00:02:54,032 No, actually, we're not-- we're not fighting at all. 22 00:02:54,034 --> 00:02:55,501 We never fight. 23 00:02:56,034 --> 00:02:57,098 That's true. 24 00:02:57,100 --> 00:02:58,933 Go back to bed, baby, okay? 25 00:02:59,367 --> 00:03:02,067 Come here, Charlie. Come on. Outside. 26 00:03:06,135 --> 00:03:08,467 Come on, Charlie. Charlie, come. 27 00:03:09,067 --> 00:03:10,235 Come on, Charlie, let's go. 28 00:03:27,833 --> 00:03:29,268 -Our last hurrah. -What? 29 00:03:30,933 --> 00:03:32,401 -You know, just with the-- -Yeah, yeah. 30 00:03:33,367 --> 00:03:35,032 The other day, we were watching this, like, 31 00:03:35,034 --> 00:03:36,332 just one of those doomsday docs, right? 32 00:03:36,334 --> 00:03:37,565 You know, meteors, the Earth, wars, 33 00:03:37,567 --> 00:03:38,365 -everything, all that stuff. -Uh-huh. 34 00:03:38,367 --> 00:03:39,565 And so, you know, he had 35 00:03:39,567 --> 00:03:41,065 the weirdest look on his face. 36 00:03:41,067 --> 00:03:42,300 And at the end of the doc, I looked at him, 37 00:03:42,301 --> 00:03:43,998 and I said, you know, 38 00:03:44,000 --> 00:03:46,432 "How do you feel about that? Does that bother you? Does it--" 39 00:03:46,434 --> 00:03:48,300 You know, fully expecting him to be like, 40 00:03:48,301 --> 00:03:50,065 "Hey, what-- What do we do about this?" 41 00:03:50,067 --> 00:03:51,465 Nothing. 42 00:03:51,467 --> 00:03:53,532 He's perfectly fine with the world coming to an end. 43 00:03:53,534 --> 00:03:55,332 He literally said, 44 00:03:55,334 --> 00:03:57,233 "Well, you know, I've had a good life up until now. 45 00:03:57,235 --> 00:03:58,565 What's there to be sad about?" 46 00:03:58,567 --> 00:04:01,898 Jalen, my 17-year-old boy. 47 00:04:01,900 --> 00:04:03,166 First of all, he's brilliant, right? 48 00:04:03,168 --> 00:04:05,499 He excels at everything he puts his mind to. 49 00:04:05,501 --> 00:04:07,898 But I just thought, "What kind of mindset is that?" 50 00:04:07,900 --> 00:04:11,399 My body does not say it, but I still feel... 51 00:04:11,401 --> 00:04:14,266 like I'm 24 years old, at best. 52 00:04:14,268 --> 00:04:16,066 Thank you, babe. Shut up, Stephen. 53 00:04:16,068 --> 00:04:17,199 But, you know, seriously, though. 54 00:04:17,201 --> 00:04:18,898 I'm not ready for shit to end, right? 55 00:04:18,900 --> 00:04:20,534 -Are you? No? -No. 56 00:04:20,900 --> 00:04:23,532 Well, because he lives in a world with the likelihood 57 00:04:23,534 --> 00:04:25,233 that we may blow ourselves up at any moment. 58 00:04:25,235 --> 00:04:26,332 What? 59 00:04:26,334 --> 00:04:27,465 But that's nothing new. 60 00:04:27,467 --> 00:04:28,399 We all grew up during the Cold War. 61 00:04:28,401 --> 00:04:29,898 Guys, it isn't that. 62 00:04:29,900 --> 00:04:30,931 Yeah, but remember, we were scared. 63 00:04:30,933 --> 00:04:32,099 It's not that. He's alive. 64 00:04:32,101 --> 00:04:34,199 You know? He just goes. 65 00:04:34,201 --> 00:04:37,499 He goes for it every day. He crushes it every day. 66 00:04:37,501 --> 00:04:38,365 -That's true. -Mm. Yeah. 67 00:04:38,367 --> 00:04:40,332 And he's in joy because of it. 68 00:04:40,334 --> 00:04:41,831 How 'bout joy? 69 00:04:41,833 --> 00:04:44,033 I mean, it's beautiful. 70 00:04:44,035 --> 00:04:46,499 Not giving a fuck about trying to be like other people 71 00:04:46,501 --> 00:04:48,168 or trying to be a grown-up. 72 00:04:48,367 --> 00:04:50,499 Uh! Fuck! 73 00:04:50,501 --> 00:04:51,831 Wait, are you talking about me? 74 00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:53,300 No, somebody alive! 75 00:04:53,301 --> 00:04:54,565 -Shit. -Jesus. 76 00:04:54,567 --> 00:04:56,235 -I was joking! -Also dead. 77 00:04:57,833 --> 00:04:59,900 Just joking. 78 00:05:00,301 --> 00:05:02,268 You are so alive, darling. 79 00:05:02,601 --> 00:05:03,565 -Hey, I found it! -"Darling"? 80 00:05:03,567 --> 00:05:05,033 Yes. 81 00:05:05,035 --> 00:05:06,965 -Oh, shit! -Oh, my God! 82 00:05:06,967 --> 00:05:08,432 -Oh, my gosh. -Are you all right? 83 00:05:08,434 --> 00:05:09,432 You all right? 84 00:05:09,434 --> 00:05:11,532 Oh, my God. Are you okay? 85 00:05:11,534 --> 00:05:14,199 -Oh, the rug. I'm sorry-- -Fuck. What the absolute fuck? 86 00:05:14,201 --> 00:05:15,432 -Balls! -I'm sorry! 87 00:05:15,434 --> 00:05:17,266 I'll go. No, no, no, it's okay. 88 00:05:17,268 --> 00:05:19,233 -No, no! There's milk in it! -I'll get more. I'll get more. 89 00:05:19,235 --> 00:05:20,931 -Balls. No. -It's right around the corner. 90 00:05:20,933 --> 00:05:22,099 -She doesn't need it. -Stay, it's fine. 91 00:05:22,101 --> 00:05:23,233 -It's like every week. -I'm sorry. Sorry. 92 00:05:23,235 --> 00:05:24,565 God. 93 00:05:24,567 --> 00:05:25,898 Don't cry over spilled oat milk, okay? 94 00:05:25,900 --> 00:05:27,365 Yeah, this is fine for you. 95 00:05:27,367 --> 00:05:29,166 -Jesus. -Oh, my God. 96 00:05:29,168 --> 00:05:31,300 -It's literally everyday. -Balls, it's perfect. 97 00:05:31,301 --> 00:05:32,999 -Thank you. -You all right? 98 00:05:33,001 --> 00:05:36,266 Uh, yeah. I'm a little... I'm just, like, a little nervous. 99 00:05:36,268 --> 00:05:37,467 -Yeah, you seem it. -'Cause, uh... 100 00:05:38,467 --> 00:05:40,168 one of the guys is, uh... 101 00:05:42,035 --> 00:05:43,266 not gonna be there next Saturday matinee, 102 00:05:43,268 --> 00:05:45,101 so if you wanna come... 103 00:05:45,567 --> 00:05:48,233 Oh, wow. Shit. Do you know all his lines? 104 00:05:48,235 --> 00:05:50,235 His lines? Yeah, I know all the disciples' lines. 105 00:05:50,567 --> 00:05:52,465 -Of Christ? -Yeah. 106 00:05:52,467 --> 00:05:54,599 I'm just so grateful I can grow such a hefty beard. 107 00:05:54,601 --> 00:05:55,865 You know what I mean? Do I look like a disciple? 108 00:05:55,867 --> 00:05:57,499 -Babe, what? What? -Am I doing it wrong? I'm sorry. 109 00:05:57,501 --> 00:05:59,066 No? I'm sorry. 110 00:05:59,068 --> 00:06:00,898 -Oh, my God. -This always happens. 111 00:06:00,900 --> 00:06:02,499 Half of me is always living in the play. 112 00:06:02,501 --> 00:06:03,831 -Jesus. -Yeah. 113 00:06:03,833 --> 00:06:04,999 It's the burden of my beautiful wife. 114 00:06:05,001 --> 00:06:06,332 Oh, God. 115 00:06:06,334 --> 00:06:07,900 You got it, St. Paul. 116 00:06:08,101 --> 00:06:11,365 Mm. Living with an artist, guys. Living with an artist. 117 00:06:11,367 --> 00:06:13,033 By the way, Oyster Bay? 118 00:06:13,035 --> 00:06:14,233 -Yeah? -We call the primary. 119 00:06:14,235 --> 00:06:15,266 Wait, you can't call it this far out. 120 00:06:15,268 --> 00:06:16,266 Yes, we just did actually. 121 00:06:16,268 --> 00:06:17,399 Why not? Let them. 122 00:06:17,401 --> 00:06:18,865 What do you mean? It's not forever. 123 00:06:18,867 --> 00:06:20,565 Let them. Babe, they're literally newlyweds. 124 00:06:20,567 --> 00:06:22,532 Plus, y'all two always take the love shack attic anyway. 125 00:06:22,534 --> 00:06:23,999 It's actually perfect. I love it. 126 00:06:24,001 --> 00:06:25,365 -Hey, you wanna know why? -Yeah. 127 00:06:25,367 --> 00:06:27,168 Because we made Jalen there. 128 00:06:27,401 --> 00:06:28,565 We're not making any more babies. 129 00:06:28,567 --> 00:06:30,033 -Yeah. -No. 130 00:06:30,035 --> 00:06:31,399 Well, you never know-- Oh no, that's true. 131 00:06:31,401 --> 00:06:32,399 You didn't even make your first two that way, right? 132 00:06:32,401 --> 00:06:33,599 Okay, wow. 133 00:06:33,601 --> 00:06:35,266 -Dude. -That's enough. 134 00:06:35,268 --> 00:06:36,399 -No, please. Babe, stop, stop. -All right. It's okay. 135 00:06:36,401 --> 00:06:37,865 -No, but you have to have sex. -Please stop talking. 136 00:06:37,867 --> 00:06:38,932 Okay. Sorry, sorry. 137 00:06:38,934 --> 00:06:40,233 We have sex, we just didn't-- 138 00:06:40,235 --> 00:06:41,532 You know what, you guys, 139 00:06:41,534 --> 00:06:42,565 maybe we should just kinda wrap this thing up? 140 00:06:42,567 --> 00:06:43,499 Wait, you did have sex to make--? 141 00:06:43,501 --> 00:06:44,399 Yeah, yeah. You know what? We gotta-- 142 00:06:44,401 --> 00:06:45,699 That's too much gardening for you, please. 143 00:06:45,701 --> 00:06:49,166 I thought that they put it-- No, I thought you created a zygote. 144 00:06:49,168 --> 00:06:50,999 -I'm so tired. -Christine. 145 00:06:51,001 --> 00:06:53,499 -What? -You baking your cookies? 146 00:06:53,501 --> 00:06:54,999 Oh, um... 147 00:06:55,001 --> 00:06:56,599 Why? Why? Does it smell like cookies? 148 00:06:56,601 --> 00:06:57,565 Mm-hmm. 149 00:06:57,567 --> 00:06:58,865 Really? 150 00:06:58,867 --> 00:07:00,033 No, I just-- I think my kitchen 151 00:07:00,035 --> 00:07:02,166 just always smells like that. You know? 152 00:07:02,168 --> 00:07:04,434 And you know what? Also, I was heating the food in the oven. 153 00:07:04,901 --> 00:07:06,334 Do you want dessert? 154 00:07:07,068 --> 00:07:09,201 -We called an Uber. -We have fortune cookies. 155 00:07:09,501 --> 00:07:10,999 Do you remember Macaulay Culkin? 156 00:07:11,001 --> 00:07:13,233 When they came back, he was changed forever. 157 00:07:13,235 --> 00:07:15,168 -And I believed it. -Babe. Let's walk them out. 158 00:07:15,833 --> 00:07:17,233 You asked her about it specifically? 159 00:07:17,235 --> 00:07:18,367 Yeah. She lied. 160 00:07:18,567 --> 00:07:19,833 Oh... 161 00:07:20,768 --> 00:07:23,001 She was hiding 'em till after we'd all gone. 162 00:07:23,567 --> 00:07:26,334 When they get even higher as fuck. Right? 163 00:07:29,467 --> 00:07:31,401 And Christine, when she's not high? 164 00:07:32,467 --> 00:07:33,868 -So grumpy. -Ugh. 165 00:07:37,567 --> 00:07:38,434 Good thing we didn't tell 'em. 166 00:07:40,601 --> 00:07:42,201 Would've been too much for them to take. 167 00:07:58,201 --> 00:08:00,301 Maybe I laid it on a little too thick. 168 00:08:00,501 --> 00:08:01,467 Too thick? 169 00:08:03,035 --> 00:08:04,235 What? 170 00:08:04,834 --> 00:08:07,365 Why, 'cause one time you called me darling? 171 00:08:07,367 --> 00:08:08,334 That's like... 172 00:08:10,035 --> 00:08:11,599 I mean, if that's your idea 173 00:08:11,601 --> 00:08:13,932 of laying it on too thick, I mean, that's-- 174 00:08:13,934 --> 00:08:15,268 Okay, okay! 175 00:08:25,834 --> 00:08:26,834 You took one? 176 00:08:27,168 --> 00:08:28,401 Fuck yeah. 177 00:08:29,135 --> 00:08:33,367 When I went to the bathroom, I was stealing it. 178 00:08:35,934 --> 00:08:37,135 It's gonna make you really fucking high. 179 00:08:38,467 --> 00:08:40,068 That's the idea. 180 00:08:44,901 --> 00:08:45,968 Mm. 181 00:08:59,235 --> 00:09:00,434 Fuck it. 182 00:09:10,301 --> 00:09:11,534 You ate more than I did. 183 00:09:17,934 --> 00:09:20,099 Oh shit, that was probably really stupid. 184 00:09:20,101 --> 00:09:22,201 I love it. 185 00:09:23,101 --> 00:09:24,401 Oh, my God. 186 00:09:34,567 --> 00:09:36,033 Wait. What are you doing? 187 00:09:36,035 --> 00:09:37,068 Oh, my God. What am I doing? 188 00:09:37,834 --> 00:09:39,467 Sorry. Shit. 189 00:09:42,035 --> 00:09:43,099 Oh! 190 00:09:43,101 --> 00:09:44,035 Shit. 191 00:09:44,467 --> 00:09:46,035 Hey. Hey! 192 00:09:47,567 --> 00:09:48,801 You okay? 193 00:09:49,268 --> 00:09:51,068 Are you gonna be okay? 194 00:09:52,901 --> 00:09:54,567 -I think so. -Yeah? 195 00:09:55,934 --> 00:09:57,199 You're okay? 196 00:09:57,201 --> 00:09:59,068 Yeah. The cookie hasn't hit me yet. 197 00:10:01,001 --> 00:10:02,599 I'm gonna be okay. 198 00:10:02,601 --> 00:10:03,534 I'll be okay. 199 00:10:18,268 --> 00:10:19,868 Holy shit. 200 00:11:09,068 --> 00:11:10,235 What's up? 201 00:11:10,901 --> 00:11:12,465 I just wanna come in and get a drink. 202 00:11:12,467 --> 00:11:13,501 Yeah, 15 buck cover. 203 00:11:15,135 --> 00:11:16,901 -To get a drink? -It's comedy. 204 00:11:19,434 --> 00:11:20,334 Is it funny? 205 00:11:22,101 --> 00:11:23,367 It's 15 bucks, man. 206 00:11:23,901 --> 00:11:25,300 Yeah, you already said that. 207 00:11:25,301 --> 00:11:27,332 Look, man, I don't have any money on me. 208 00:11:27,334 --> 00:11:28,901 Yeah, I don't know what to tell you. 209 00:11:29,834 --> 00:11:31,099 -Hey. -Yo. 210 00:11:31,101 --> 00:11:32,135 -Good luck. -Thank you. 211 00:11:33,534 --> 00:11:35,033 How come she didn't have to pay 15 bucks? 212 00:11:35,035 --> 00:11:36,101 She put her name down. 213 00:11:40,434 --> 00:11:41,434 Well, you're welcome. 214 00:11:42,367 --> 00:11:44,868 All right. Alex Novak, downstairs in two minutes. 215 00:11:46,501 --> 00:11:47,834 That's me. 216 00:11:48,301 --> 00:11:49,501 Well, you better head down there, then. 217 00:11:50,235 --> 00:11:52,066 -Where? -Just straight behind you. 218 00:11:52,068 --> 00:11:53,268 Down the stairs. 219 00:12:01,068 --> 00:12:02,899 Hey, hey. Hey. 220 00:12:02,901 --> 00:12:04,834 Why don't you leave that right over there with the other ones? 221 00:12:05,367 --> 00:12:06,934 -Right here? -Yeah. They'll watch it. 222 00:12:10,834 --> 00:12:11,901 Okay. 223 00:12:19,602 --> 00:12:20,600 Oh, my God. It's completely different. 224 00:12:20,602 --> 00:12:22,899 Like, you cannot have casual sex with a woman. 225 00:12:22,901 --> 00:12:24,199 Okay? You can't do it. 226 00:12:24,201 --> 00:12:27,566 You have to buy her dinner, um, at least. 227 00:12:27,568 --> 00:12:29,334 With men, I am the dinner. 228 00:12:31,001 --> 00:12:34,099 It's easy. It's easy. It's simple. It's simple. 229 00:12:34,101 --> 00:12:35,832 -Sorry. -What up, man? 230 00:12:35,834 --> 00:12:37,401 -They called me. -Yeah. 231 00:12:38,434 --> 00:12:40,301 When you see the light, just get off, all right? 232 00:12:41,901 --> 00:12:43,999 There you go. Just talk to 'em, have fun. 233 00:12:44,001 --> 00:12:45,465 ...orgasm from a man who embarrasses you. 234 00:12:45,467 --> 00:12:48,235 No, I'm leaving. I'm leaving. I'm going. 235 00:12:51,068 --> 00:12:52,465 Okay. 236 00:12:52,467 --> 00:12:55,099 That's Rolo, everybody! That was really funny. 237 00:12:55,101 --> 00:12:57,999 Alrighty, I got a lot of familiar names on here, 238 00:12:58,001 --> 00:12:59,832 but I'm gonna shake it up a bit. 239 00:12:59,834 --> 00:13:03,365 Uh, let's put your hands together for Alec Novak? 240 00:13:03,367 --> 00:13:04,602 Alec Novak. 241 00:13:07,035 --> 00:13:08,401 Alec Novak, everybody. 242 00:13:10,301 --> 00:13:11,101 Alec! 243 00:13:26,201 --> 00:13:27,434 Um... 244 00:13:32,301 --> 00:13:34,001 I don't have a ton of jokes. 245 00:13:36,535 --> 00:13:38,199 And, uh... 246 00:13:38,201 --> 00:13:41,467 Actually my name is Alex Novak, uh, for that lady. 247 00:13:43,334 --> 00:13:45,101 It's okay. 248 00:13:46,201 --> 00:13:47,568 My parents won't be mad. 249 00:13:50,901 --> 00:13:52,101 Um... 250 00:13:53,968 --> 00:13:55,135 What do I tell ya? 251 00:13:56,334 --> 00:13:57,901 Um... 252 00:14:01,201 --> 00:14:02,968 I think I'm getting a divorce. 253 00:14:04,934 --> 00:14:06,035 Yeah. 254 00:14:09,401 --> 00:14:11,133 What tipped me off was that, uh, 255 00:14:11,135 --> 00:14:13,602 I'm living, um, in an apartment on my own. 256 00:14:15,434 --> 00:14:16,999 Yeah. 257 00:14:17,001 --> 00:14:19,235 And my wife and kids don't live there. So... 258 00:14:22,602 --> 00:14:24,301 That was probably the-- the biggest clue. 259 00:14:27,068 --> 00:14:28,068 Um... 260 00:14:36,401 --> 00:14:38,535 I was, uh... Well, I was married for 20 years. 261 00:14:40,135 --> 00:14:41,968 Yeah. 262 00:14:42,568 --> 00:14:44,568 Uh, engaged-- Uh, engaged for two years. 263 00:14:45,868 --> 00:14:47,068 Dated for three. 264 00:14:50,135 --> 00:14:53,435 And... met a year before that. 265 00:14:55,934 --> 00:14:57,334 So, 26 years. 266 00:15:00,135 --> 00:15:01,201 Which makes sense... 267 00:15:02,834 --> 00:15:04,899 now, because my wife used to say being married to me 268 00:15:04,901 --> 00:15:06,402 was like running a marathon. 269 00:15:10,235 --> 00:15:12,402 I don't really know what happened, um... 270 00:15:15,135 --> 00:15:16,332 to my marriage. Uh... 271 00:15:16,334 --> 00:15:21,001 I came home one day, um... and my... 272 00:15:23,301 --> 00:15:25,068 I guess, still wife, but... 273 00:15:26,301 --> 00:15:28,068 Uh, Tess was her name. 274 00:15:29,934 --> 00:15:33,168 Her name is still Tess. 275 00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:37,301 I plan on, uh, letting her keep that in the divorce. 276 00:15:42,068 --> 00:15:43,332 Um... 277 00:15:43,334 --> 00:15:46,135 Yeah, I-- I came home, and, um... 278 00:15:46,868 --> 00:15:49,535 there was a conversation, I remember, and somebody said... 279 00:15:52,068 --> 00:15:56,068 It, um... "Should we end this thing?" 280 00:15:56,568 --> 00:15:58,301 And then there was an agreement. 281 00:16:00,035 --> 00:16:02,035 Um, I'm pretty sure she said-- 282 00:16:04,135 --> 00:16:06,201 This is what she meant about not paying attention. 283 00:16:09,101 --> 00:16:11,301 Yeah, she-- I came home. 284 00:16:12,934 --> 00:16:14,368 And, uh... 285 00:16:14,968 --> 00:16:17,868 I guess we both agreed it was over. 286 00:16:18,235 --> 00:16:21,402 Which is awesome... that at least we agreed on that. 287 00:16:24,602 --> 00:16:26,500 It was less awesome for our two kids. 288 00:16:26,502 --> 00:16:28,966 Yeah. 289 00:16:28,968 --> 00:16:30,135 It's okay. They're ten. 290 00:16:32,602 --> 00:16:34,335 The-- They're not-- They're not twins. 291 00:16:35,301 --> 00:16:36,502 They're Irish twins. 292 00:16:38,901 --> 00:16:40,001 Which is... 293 00:16:41,934 --> 00:16:43,901 ...why I pulled an Irish goodbye when I left. 294 00:16:46,135 --> 00:16:47,435 Oh, come on. 295 00:16:48,001 --> 00:16:49,333 I thought you guys told-- 296 00:16:49,335 --> 00:16:50,566 I thought this was a comedy... 297 00:16:50,568 --> 00:16:52,801 ...show. 298 00:16:55,402 --> 00:16:56,834 Anyway, um... 299 00:16:58,068 --> 00:17:00,502 I think I earned my keep here. Um... 300 00:17:03,602 --> 00:17:05,468 What do I say? My name's Alex. 301 00:17:10,201 --> 00:17:11,866 Alex Novak, everybody. 302 00:17:11,868 --> 00:17:13,267 Sorry. Is there a bathroom here? 303 00:17:13,269 --> 00:17:17,366 Wow. All right, let's hear it for Jill McKenzie. 304 00:17:17,368 --> 00:17:20,468 There she is. There she is. 305 00:17:22,068 --> 00:17:24,233 Keep it going for Kemp, you guys. Kemp rules. 306 00:17:24,235 --> 00:17:25,302 What's up? 307 00:17:26,235 --> 00:17:28,366 The side part is the skinny part. Agreed? 308 00:17:28,368 --> 00:17:31,199 Now, the skinny part, the side part-- same part. 309 00:17:31,201 --> 00:17:33,500 Same size, same part. You know what I'm talking about? 310 00:17:33,502 --> 00:17:35,233 You take it out and-- 311 00:17:35,235 --> 00:17:37,502 ♪ Allez, allez, allez ♪ 312 00:17:38,168 --> 00:17:40,435 ♪ Allez, allez, allez ♪ 313 00:17:40,968 --> 00:17:42,868 You have to favor a labia? 314 00:17:43,335 --> 00:17:45,502 ♪ We've conquered All of Europe ♪ 315 00:17:46,068 --> 00:17:47,968 ♪ We're never gonna stop ♪ 316 00:17:49,368 --> 00:17:51,269 ♪ Allez, allez, allez ♪ 317 00:17:52,568 --> 00:17:54,868 ♪ Allez, allez, allez ♪ 318 00:17:55,535 --> 00:17:57,066 because she wants me to feel good. 319 00:17:57,068 --> 00:17:58,999 Like, for instance, she's like a hot girl. 320 00:17:59,001 --> 00:18:00,300 You know what I mean? Like, she has the vagina 321 00:18:00,302 --> 00:18:01,966 that fits the little underwear, okay? 322 00:18:01,968 --> 00:18:03,300 She goes... And she... 323 00:18:03,302 --> 00:18:05,033 What was the advice she gave me? 324 00:18:05,035 --> 00:18:06,199 Oh, she said, "Boundaries?" 325 00:18:06,201 --> 00:18:07,333 You guys know about these boundaries? 326 00:18:07,335 --> 00:18:08,932 You guys talk about these boundaries? 327 00:18:08,934 --> 00:18:10,333 -She goes... -First time? 328 00:18:10,335 --> 00:18:12,066 She goes, um, "You need to learn how to set boundaries." 329 00:18:12,068 --> 00:18:13,433 Yeah. 330 00:18:13,435 --> 00:18:14,966 Stick around. Support your fellow comics. 331 00:18:14,968 --> 00:18:16,500 "I told my boyfriend he has to text me 332 00:18:16,502 --> 00:18:18,166 every night before bed, 333 00:18:18,168 --> 00:18:19,934 'Goodnight, I love you' or it's over." 334 00:18:21,868 --> 00:18:24,333 And she goes, "Now, he texts me every night before bed, 335 00:18:24,335 --> 00:18:26,500 'Goodnight, I love you.' And now everything's great." 336 00:18:26,502 --> 00:18:28,932 And I was like, "Oh, thank-- thank you. Thanks." 337 00:18:28,934 --> 00:18:31,466 If I said that to any man I've ever dated, they would be like, 338 00:18:31,468 --> 00:18:32,966 "Oh, perfect. I was on the fence anyway. 339 00:18:32,968 --> 00:18:34,035 Get the fuck outta here, bitch." 340 00:18:35,468 --> 00:18:37,832 You know what, I'm not fucking calling in favors. 341 00:18:37,834 --> 00:18:39,566 With me in a relationship, it's me going, "No, dude." 342 00:18:39,568 --> 00:18:42,466 I... I gotta date better men. I have to. 343 00:18:42,468 --> 00:18:44,400 My girlfriends are dating men who are, like, 344 00:18:44,402 --> 00:18:46,999 running 10Ks on the weekends for fun. 345 00:18:47,001 --> 00:18:49,466 My ex wouldn't let me touch his Magic: The Gathering cards 346 00:18:49,468 --> 00:18:51,600 'cause he was worried that I would bend them. 347 00:18:51,602 --> 00:18:54,068 They didn't say nothing about my sister's new ass. 348 00:18:54,335 --> 00:18:55,566 Not even a warning. 349 00:18:55,568 --> 00:18:56,966 Just a warning would have been nice. 350 00:18:56,968 --> 00:18:58,333 Something. Anything. 351 00:18:58,335 --> 00:19:00,400 "Hey Reggie, go in the kitchen. 352 00:19:00,402 --> 00:19:02,366 Meg Thee Stallion is in there." 353 00:19:02,368 --> 00:19:05,033 Now, I don't feel bad for looking at my sister's new butt. 354 00:19:05,035 --> 00:19:07,099 ...on PS5. Kung fu game. 355 00:19:07,101 --> 00:19:08,101 Got it right now? 356 00:20:05,602 --> 00:20:07,267 So, what happens now? 357 00:20:07,269 --> 00:20:09,568 Between, you know, Mom and you? 358 00:20:10,136 --> 00:20:11,500 What do you mean? 359 00:20:11,502 --> 00:20:14,999 Well, you know, you guys told us that you separated? 360 00:20:15,001 --> 00:20:16,366 Yeah. 361 00:20:16,368 --> 00:20:18,368 Does that mean you're going to get divorced? 362 00:20:19,535 --> 00:20:21,234 Well, I... 363 00:20:21,236 --> 00:20:22,899 -Remember that dragon? -What dragon? 364 00:20:22,901 --> 00:20:24,966 At the... at the assembly. 365 00:20:24,968 --> 00:20:27,100 The school assembly. The big red dragon. 366 00:20:27,102 --> 00:20:29,001 You mean the lion? 367 00:20:29,302 --> 00:20:30,899 Was it a lion? Looked like a dragon. 368 00:20:30,901 --> 00:20:32,167 It only had two people in it. 369 00:20:32,169 --> 00:20:33,832 Huh. 370 00:20:33,834 --> 00:20:35,566 What does a dragon have to do with anything? 371 00:20:35,568 --> 00:20:37,267 -It was a lion. -Whatever it was, 372 00:20:37,269 --> 00:20:38,966 -lion or dragon. -Lion. 373 00:20:38,968 --> 00:20:41,067 It was big and it was brave, 374 00:20:41,069 --> 00:20:43,100 and that's what I need you guys to be. 375 00:20:43,102 --> 00:20:44,600 That's not it at all. 376 00:20:44,602 --> 00:20:46,200 The lion chews up the lettuce, 377 00:20:46,202 --> 00:20:48,433 and that brings us wealth and prosperity for the new year. 378 00:20:48,435 --> 00:20:51,035 Right. That's it. That's exactly it. Right. 379 00:20:51,502 --> 00:20:53,234 Are you going to feed the lion, Dad? 380 00:20:53,236 --> 00:20:54,834 Me? I don't know, I... 381 00:20:55,302 --> 00:20:57,100 Are you? 382 00:20:57,102 --> 00:20:59,500 I fed it because I have goals this year I want to achieve. 383 00:20:59,502 --> 00:21:00,999 Do you have goals, Dad? 384 00:21:01,001 --> 00:21:02,300 No, of course I do. Of course-- 385 00:21:02,302 --> 00:21:04,102 -Dad, you should have goals. -We have goals. 386 00:21:06,335 --> 00:21:07,300 Good night, guys. 387 00:21:07,302 --> 00:21:08,234 -Settle in. -Dad-- 388 00:21:08,236 --> 00:21:09,267 Settle in. All right. 389 00:21:09,269 --> 00:21:10,999 -Love you. -Love you, too. 390 00:21:11,001 --> 00:21:12,932 Get down there. Get down there. 391 00:21:12,934 --> 00:21:14,834 All right, you guys. Good night, guys. 392 00:21:16,169 --> 00:21:17,868 -No talking, all right, guys? -Okay. 393 00:21:26,269 --> 00:21:28,267 I haven't told your father. 394 00:21:28,269 --> 00:21:29,366 What? 395 00:21:29,368 --> 00:21:31,134 Entre nous. 396 00:21:31,136 --> 00:21:33,466 No, Mom, there is no entre nous. We don't have any secrets. 397 00:21:33,468 --> 00:21:35,167 The boys know everything. You don't have to whisper. 398 00:21:35,169 --> 00:21:36,466 Well, you don't have to embarrass me. 399 00:21:36,468 --> 00:21:37,566 I just told you your father doesn't know. 400 00:21:37,568 --> 00:21:39,300 -Okay-- -What doesn't Grandpa know? 401 00:21:39,302 --> 00:21:41,034 That Mom and I are splitting up. 402 00:21:41,036 --> 00:21:42,400 Oh. 403 00:21:42,402 --> 00:21:43,566 Think you should tell him, Dada. 404 00:21:43,568 --> 00:21:45,134 -Great. -Yes, son, that's up to you. 405 00:21:45,136 --> 00:21:46,234 It's got nothing to do with me. 406 00:21:46,236 --> 00:21:47,400 Yeah, well tell that to our marriage. 407 00:21:47,402 --> 00:21:49,067 Look how you're going on. 408 00:21:49,069 --> 00:21:52,267 And stop being jealous of my friendship with Tess. 409 00:21:52,269 --> 00:21:54,866 I adore her. I love her so much. 410 00:21:54,868 --> 00:21:56,333 -Dad! Dad? -Yeah. I know it. What? 411 00:21:56,335 --> 00:21:57,832 -And you know something? -Dad! 412 00:21:57,834 --> 00:22:00,034 Look, you two have always been very different. 413 00:22:00,036 --> 00:22:00,899 Yeah, and you and Dad are twins? 414 00:22:00,901 --> 00:22:02,200 Dad? Dad? 415 00:22:02,202 --> 00:22:03,899 Your father is an immigrant to this country. 416 00:22:03,901 --> 00:22:05,832 -I know that. -And I've always been a woman 417 00:22:05,834 --> 00:22:07,134 who wants the taste of the exotic. 418 00:22:07,136 --> 00:22:08,932 -And that's what makes it work. -Mom! Jesus, Mom. 419 00:22:08,934 --> 00:22:09,932 I'm just saying this in front of the children... 420 00:22:09,934 --> 00:22:11,366 Can I have another apple juice? 421 00:22:11,368 --> 00:22:12,533 -I already said no. -...because there's no secrets, 422 00:22:12,535 --> 00:22:15,566 -so... Just pick a lane, okay? -I know. 423 00:22:15,568 --> 00:22:17,402 -Why not? -For crying out loud. 424 00:22:18,169 --> 00:22:19,267 Felix, it's your turn. 425 00:22:19,269 --> 00:22:21,067 Mom, do you have any... 426 00:22:21,069 --> 00:22:22,500 Do you have any more of those juice boxes? 427 00:22:22,502 --> 00:22:24,433 Your father drank them all. 428 00:22:24,435 --> 00:22:26,433 It's got little pretzels on it. 429 00:22:26,435 --> 00:22:28,433 They're all individual pretzels? 430 00:22:28,435 --> 00:22:30,134 They all started individual, 431 00:22:30,136 --> 00:22:32,400 and then I, uh, glued most of them together. 432 00:22:32,402 --> 00:22:33,533 Oh, oh. 433 00:22:33,535 --> 00:22:35,234 There's one or two separate. 434 00:22:35,236 --> 00:22:36,899 And you have the mustard and the ketchup there, too. 435 00:22:36,901 --> 00:22:37,967 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 436 00:22:37,969 --> 00:22:39,433 But the guy's got the day off. 437 00:22:39,435 --> 00:22:40,932 You know? 438 00:22:40,934 --> 00:22:42,267 He's got the day off like the rest of the town. 439 00:22:42,269 --> 00:22:44,169 Everybody's taking today off. 440 00:22:45,069 --> 00:22:47,169 She thinks I don't know, but I know. 441 00:22:47,834 --> 00:22:49,234 Here, put that there. 442 00:22:49,236 --> 00:22:50,069 And, uh... 443 00:22:51,602 --> 00:22:53,269 For me, it's no big deal. 444 00:22:54,202 --> 00:22:57,167 Well, it is kind of a big deal, Dad. 445 00:22:57,169 --> 00:22:58,500 I think that we're gonna get divorced. 446 00:22:58,502 --> 00:23:00,400 Ah, okay. Slow down. 447 00:23:00,402 --> 00:23:02,502 Slow down. 448 00:23:04,302 --> 00:23:06,202 Clean your plates everyone. 449 00:23:06,602 --> 00:23:08,236 Grandma, do you have any Jell-O? 450 00:23:08,535 --> 00:23:10,136 -In the fridge. -Okay. 451 00:23:12,136 --> 00:23:14,366 That's not what's going on. Nobody cheated. 452 00:23:14,368 --> 00:23:16,967 Yeah, well, so what is the problem then? 453 00:23:16,969 --> 00:23:17,801 I don't know, it's... 454 00:23:19,935 --> 00:23:21,167 ...complicated. 455 00:23:21,169 --> 00:23:22,335 It's complicated. 456 00:23:24,269 --> 00:23:25,868 You don't have to tell me that. 457 00:25:25,535 --> 00:25:27,935 Is Dada going to be okay? 458 00:25:28,302 --> 00:25:30,867 Of course. What do you mean? 459 00:25:30,869 --> 00:25:34,067 I don't know, he's just out there. On his own. 460 00:25:34,069 --> 00:25:35,333 But he's not alone. 461 00:25:35,335 --> 00:25:37,600 He loves when you boys stay with him. 462 00:25:37,602 --> 00:25:40,500 -But he sleeps on the couch. -Huh? 463 00:25:40,502 --> 00:25:42,167 We sleep in his bed. 464 00:25:42,169 --> 00:25:43,568 Yeah, it's awesome. 465 00:25:44,202 --> 00:25:45,236 Great. 466 00:26:05,036 --> 00:26:07,335 For fuck's sake. 467 00:26:12,402 --> 00:26:14,169 Hey there, I'm Alex Novak. 468 00:26:15,036 --> 00:26:16,236 How you doing tonight? 469 00:26:16,969 --> 00:26:19,333 Once again I didn't want to pay the 15 bucks, 470 00:26:19,335 --> 00:26:21,368 so... here I am. 471 00:26:23,935 --> 00:26:25,433 No, I'm joking, and... 472 00:26:25,435 --> 00:26:27,435 No, no, no, I'm joking. I, uh... 473 00:26:28,435 --> 00:26:30,833 I didn't pay last time, but I was willing to pay this time, 474 00:26:30,835 --> 00:26:31,635 but I wanted to, uh... 475 00:26:33,335 --> 00:26:35,967 I said, uh, I wanted to have fun. 476 00:26:35,969 --> 00:26:37,167 Wanted to have fun here tonight. 477 00:26:37,169 --> 00:26:38,502 Anybody else wanna have fun? 478 00:26:39,202 --> 00:26:40,933 Yeah? 479 00:26:40,935 --> 00:26:43,366 You know, I recently got fired. 480 00:26:43,368 --> 00:26:46,136 It's the fucking fifth time I've been fired. 481 00:26:47,468 --> 00:26:49,335 I've only had three jobs. 482 00:26:52,835 --> 00:26:55,435 That means I've gotten fired from two jobs fucking twice. 483 00:26:57,402 --> 00:26:58,533 Funny how things change... 484 00:26:58,535 --> 00:26:59,833 Bathroom's straight down and to the right. 485 00:26:59,835 --> 00:27:01,200 No, I think I'm next on the... 486 00:27:01,202 --> 00:27:02,134 How things become cool and uncool. 487 00:27:02,136 --> 00:27:03,267 They called my name. 488 00:27:03,269 --> 00:27:05,466 I drive a Tesla. 489 00:27:05,468 --> 00:27:06,468 And, um... 490 00:27:08,169 --> 00:27:09,366 I just have one question. 491 00:27:09,368 --> 00:27:12,900 Can you stop keying my fucking car? 492 00:27:12,902 --> 00:27:14,500 So, a couple months into it, 493 00:27:14,502 --> 00:27:18,200 they bring my folks in for like a parent's day. 494 00:27:18,202 --> 00:27:20,900 They kind of catch them up on our progress, you know? 495 00:27:20,902 --> 00:27:23,269 I'm-- I'm a teenager at this point and, uh... 496 00:27:23,969 --> 00:27:26,500 So they come in and, and Pete says, you know, 497 00:27:26,502 --> 00:27:28,034 "Alex has been great. 498 00:27:28,036 --> 00:27:29,466 He's opened up, and this is what's going on, 499 00:27:29,468 --> 00:27:31,100 and this is how he feels about this 500 00:27:31,102 --> 00:27:33,600 and this dynamic that's going on at home." 501 00:27:33,602 --> 00:27:35,535 My parents just kind of listen. 502 00:27:36,169 --> 00:27:38,833 We're driving home, little while later. 503 00:27:38,835 --> 00:27:40,200 And I remember this so clearly. 504 00:27:40,202 --> 00:27:43,566 I was in the back seat of my mom's station wagon. 505 00:27:43,568 --> 00:27:45,134 But my dad was driving. Doesn't matter. 506 00:27:45,136 --> 00:27:46,967 If my Dad was in the car, he was always driving, 507 00:27:46,969 --> 00:27:49,433 even though it was my mom's station wagon. 508 00:27:49,435 --> 00:27:53,000 And I remember her being in the passenger seat 509 00:27:53,002 --> 00:27:56,468 and spinning around, and looking at me and saying, 510 00:27:57,468 --> 00:28:00,335 "How dare you tell this stranger all our family secrets." 511 00:28:03,269 --> 00:28:06,234 And I was like, "You made go talk to the guy. 512 00:28:06,236 --> 00:28:09,200 You literally paid the guy to listen to the problem. 513 00:28:09,202 --> 00:28:11,867 You set this up. You drove me there." 514 00:28:11,869 --> 00:28:13,067 That's insane. 515 00:28:13,069 --> 00:28:14,335 That would be like... 516 00:28:15,368 --> 00:28:16,833 That would be like-- That'd be like your partner 517 00:28:16,835 --> 00:28:18,869 driving you to an orgy... 518 00:28:20,368 --> 00:28:21,933 ...and then saying, 519 00:28:21,935 --> 00:28:24,102 "I can't believe you fucked all those people." 520 00:28:26,036 --> 00:28:28,500 "That was the point of being there in the-- 521 00:28:28,502 --> 00:28:32,169 You knew where I was going. I was naked in the car." 522 00:28:33,869 --> 00:28:35,500 Anyway, uh, this is, uh... 523 00:28:35,502 --> 00:28:36,900 Boy, this is starting to actually get good 524 00:28:36,902 --> 00:28:38,200 and now my time is up. 525 00:28:38,202 --> 00:28:40,202 This is so awesome. I will see you next time. 526 00:28:41,969 --> 00:28:43,833 Same place. I'm coming back. We'll meet here, all right? 527 00:28:43,835 --> 00:28:45,333 We'll all meet here. All right, I've been Alex Novak. 528 00:28:45,335 --> 00:28:46,833 Thank you so much. 529 00:28:46,835 --> 00:28:48,566 Sad guy, you hanging out? 530 00:28:48,568 --> 00:28:50,234 Everyone's hanging out in the back booth to the right. 531 00:28:50,236 --> 00:28:51,200 We got some actually funny people 532 00:28:51,202 --> 00:28:53,167 -coming to the stage next. -Okay, thank you. 533 00:28:53,169 --> 00:28:54,400 Good. It takes the pressure off. 534 00:28:54,402 --> 00:28:55,900 That's how I feel about my dog. 535 00:28:55,902 --> 00:28:57,034 Hey. 536 00:28:57,036 --> 00:28:58,300 -Cool to sit down here? -Yeah. 537 00:28:58,302 --> 00:29:00,234 -Look who's back. -Just talked to Rolo upstairs. 538 00:29:00,236 --> 00:29:02,000 Hey, I remember you from my-- Yeah. 539 00:29:02,002 --> 00:29:04,366 -What up? Dan. What up? -Alex. 540 00:29:04,368 --> 00:29:06,833 How'd it go? I'm surprised you back. 541 00:29:06,835 --> 00:29:07,833 -Really? -Yeah. 542 00:29:07,835 --> 00:29:09,167 -That bad? -Yeah, I mean... 543 00:29:09,169 --> 00:29:10,533 -It wasn't bad. -It wasn't. 544 00:29:10,535 --> 00:29:12,100 -What do you even do? -Just say it. 545 00:29:12,102 --> 00:29:13,466 -He's gonna ask for a job. -Come on, what is it? 546 00:29:13,468 --> 00:29:15,067 I work in finance. 547 00:29:15,069 --> 00:29:16,300 If you wanna do it again, I'll tell you the website. 548 00:29:16,302 --> 00:29:17,466 Just DM me. 549 00:29:17,468 --> 00:29:19,002 -All right. -Yeah. Just... 550 00:29:19,435 --> 00:29:21,933 All the mics in the city, badsaliva.com. 551 00:29:21,935 --> 00:29:23,569 And just, keep going up. 552 00:29:24,435 --> 00:29:26,536 Yeah, yeah, yeah. You gotta go up five, six times a week. 553 00:29:28,202 --> 00:29:29,466 -Yeah. -Five or six times? 554 00:29:29,468 --> 00:29:31,267 No, sometimes we go five a night. 555 00:29:31,269 --> 00:29:32,567 On long nights, yeah. 556 00:29:32,569 --> 00:29:33,967 If you have like a bit you wanna work out, 557 00:29:33,969 --> 00:29:35,500 you go five times by the end of the night. 558 00:29:35,502 --> 00:29:37,567 You got a spot. Five minutes around the corner. 559 00:29:37,569 --> 00:29:39,067 -I'm Alex. -Lovely. 560 00:29:39,069 --> 00:29:40,466 That's the manager, and this is the one-- 561 00:29:40,468 --> 00:29:41,433 -Oh. -So, yeah, I have-- 562 00:29:41,435 --> 00:29:43,300 Don't make eye contact with her. Jesus. 563 00:29:43,302 --> 00:29:44,867 -Yeah, look down. -Shut up. 564 00:29:44,869 --> 00:29:46,167 -I have four rooms. -Sorry. 565 00:29:46,169 --> 00:29:48,567 You can see downstairs where you just were. 566 00:29:48,569 --> 00:29:49,435 Yeah. 567 00:29:50,036 --> 00:29:51,200 Stop showing off in front of your friend 568 00:29:51,202 --> 00:29:52,466 with Laverne and Shirley back there. 569 00:29:52,468 --> 00:29:54,100 Fuck you! 570 00:29:54,102 --> 00:29:55,967 -We got jobs. -I'm Laverne. I'm Laverne. 571 00:29:55,969 --> 00:29:57,167 What's your name again? 572 00:29:57,169 --> 00:29:59,034 -Alex. -Alex, come here. 573 00:29:59,036 --> 00:30:00,935 -Hey man, that's my white slave. -Shut up. 574 00:30:02,069 --> 00:30:03,267 You can have him. Take him. 575 00:30:03,269 --> 00:30:05,234 Come talk to some real comedians. 576 00:30:05,236 --> 00:30:06,433 What's up, man? 577 00:30:06,435 --> 00:30:08,136 Yo, you hold my pocket when we leave. 578 00:30:10,402 --> 00:30:13,134 You can't treat comedy like prison, man, Dan. 579 00:30:13,136 --> 00:30:14,466 He's Scared Straight -ing him. 580 00:30:14,468 --> 00:30:16,867 -Dan, don't Scared Straight him. -He's scared straight. 581 00:30:16,869 --> 00:30:18,333 He's scared white. 582 00:30:18,335 --> 00:30:20,100 You gonna be all right. How often are you getting up? 583 00:30:20,102 --> 00:30:22,534 I don't know, man. Tonight was my second time. 584 00:30:22,536 --> 00:30:24,067 I put it to you like, my pop used to let me 585 00:30:24,069 --> 00:30:25,967 watch Def Jam when I was six, 586 00:30:25,969 --> 00:30:28,400 but he would act like he was telling me not to watch it. 587 00:30:28,402 --> 00:30:31,100 "Hey, me and your stepmom are watchin' the program. 588 00:30:31,102 --> 00:30:33,534 It's on HBO. Go upstairs and watch something else." 589 00:30:33,536 --> 00:30:35,300 And then wink at me. And I'll be like, "Oh, shit." 590 00:30:35,302 --> 00:30:37,433 I actually got caught by my dad. 591 00:30:37,435 --> 00:30:39,167 I was trying to watch porn. 592 00:30:39,169 --> 00:30:40,833 You know, like, the, the late night HBO, 593 00:30:40,835 --> 00:30:42,400 the Taxicab Confessions or whatever. 594 00:30:42,402 --> 00:30:44,333 -Oh, yeah. Real Sex. -I was trying to watch porn, 595 00:30:44,335 --> 00:30:47,567 and it was Def Comedy Jam, and I saw Greer Barnes on stage 596 00:30:47,569 --> 00:30:50,134 doing a joke about Mike Tyson and Arnold Schwarzenegger 597 00:30:50,136 --> 00:30:51,400 sharing a jail cell together. 598 00:30:51,402 --> 00:30:53,100 I was dying laughing, 599 00:30:53,102 --> 00:30:55,034 and I asked my dad, I was like, "Is that a job?" 600 00:30:55,036 --> 00:30:57,433 And he was like, "Yeah. You gotta go to college first." 601 00:30:57,435 --> 00:30:59,400 -Been doing jokes ever since. -Gotta get up everyday. 602 00:30:59,402 --> 00:31:01,900 Open that diary, Anne Frank. Get to it. 603 00:31:01,902 --> 00:31:03,200 What? What's wrong? 604 00:31:03,202 --> 00:31:04,833 You guys just write stuff down all day? 605 00:31:04,835 --> 00:31:06,400 I said to open up his diary if he gonna write any jokes. 606 00:31:06,402 --> 00:31:07,967 -You gotta write. -Work on your craft. 607 00:31:07,969 --> 00:31:10,102 You gotta write. 608 00:31:25,503 --> 00:31:28,835 Just-- I was just watching CNN, and they say it's official, 609 00:31:30,169 --> 00:31:31,969 according to scientists... 610 00:31:32,402 --> 00:31:35,067 No. According to scientists, it's official, 611 00:31:35,069 --> 00:31:36,469 guys get hotter with age. 612 00:31:37,835 --> 00:31:39,366 Big win. 613 00:31:39,368 --> 00:31:41,833 Then we convinced them, you know what's really hot? 614 00:31:41,835 --> 00:31:42,569 Dad bods. 615 00:31:43,536 --> 00:31:44,967 You kiddin' me? We're on a roll. 616 00:31:44,969 --> 00:31:46,567 It's like, we're playing with house money now. 617 00:31:46,569 --> 00:31:48,933 What else-- What else can we get away with? 618 00:31:48,935 --> 00:31:50,969 You know what's super hot? Being poor. 619 00:32:08,469 --> 00:32:10,234 -He stole it. -You can't take-- 620 00:32:10,236 --> 00:32:11,467 -Hello. Good morning. Hi. -He doesn't even need it. 621 00:32:11,469 --> 00:32:12,401 -Hey. Hi. -Hey. 622 00:32:12,403 --> 00:32:13,867 Hey. Look who's here? 623 00:32:13,869 --> 00:32:15,100 -Hi, guys! Hi! Hi, guys. -Dad? 624 00:32:15,102 --> 00:32:16,467 I thought Mom was taking us to school. 625 00:32:16,469 --> 00:32:17,867 -Yeah, me too. -Yeah, I know. 626 00:32:17,869 --> 00:32:19,900 But maybe there's a surprise outside 627 00:32:19,902 --> 00:32:21,401 and maybe this has something to do with it. 628 00:32:21,403 --> 00:32:22,567 Is that a new car? 629 00:32:22,569 --> 00:32:23,867 I don't know if the term "car" 630 00:32:23,869 --> 00:32:25,034 really does it any kind of justice. 631 00:32:25,036 --> 00:32:26,333 -Alex. -Let's go. It's right outside. 632 00:32:26,335 --> 00:32:27,167 Let's go, let's go, let's go. Come check it out. 633 00:32:27,169 --> 00:32:27,800 Hold on! We're eating breakfast here. 634 00:32:27,802 --> 00:32:29,269 Come on, here we go. 635 00:32:30,935 --> 00:32:32,601 -This is sick. -Look at that! 636 00:32:32,603 --> 00:32:34,367 Oh, wait, wait, wait. 637 00:32:34,369 --> 00:32:35,467 -Hey! Hold on a second! -Whoa, this is cool. 638 00:32:35,469 --> 00:32:36,534 -Hang on. Let me get your mom. -Whoa. This is cool. 639 00:32:36,536 --> 00:32:39,367 -What? What did you do? -I am gonna immortalize 640 00:32:39,369 --> 00:32:42,100 the first moment that you lay eyes on this beauty. 641 00:32:42,102 --> 00:32:43,501 This is not how it's gonna work. 642 00:32:43,503 --> 00:32:45,234 Look at this thing. This gives you the morning off. 643 00:32:45,236 --> 00:32:47,367 From what? The morning off from what? 644 00:32:47,369 --> 00:32:49,167 I don't know. The Olympics are here in two years. 645 00:32:49,169 --> 00:32:50,467 What? 646 00:32:50,469 --> 00:32:51,300 Who knows what you're capable of? 647 00:32:51,302 --> 00:32:53,134 -What did you say? -All right. 648 00:32:53,136 --> 00:32:56,102 The fucking Olympics? Does he think that's funny? 649 00:32:56,835 --> 00:32:58,167 Fuck him. 650 00:32:58,169 --> 00:33:00,202 I mean, does he think this is about me? 651 00:33:01,336 --> 00:33:03,169 No, 'cause it's not. 652 00:33:04,069 --> 00:33:07,002 No, he didn't say it. He never says anything. 653 00:33:07,436 --> 00:33:09,002 I mean, isn't that typical? 654 00:33:09,202 --> 00:33:11,536 My God, you should know, you're his mom! 655 00:33:12,835 --> 00:33:13,935 Marilyn! 656 00:33:14,536 --> 00:33:16,134 -Hey. -I rang the doorbell. 657 00:33:16,136 --> 00:33:18,234 I hate the phone. 658 00:33:18,236 --> 00:33:19,833 I just wanted to see you. 659 00:33:19,835 --> 00:33:21,034 -Come inside. You're sweet. -No, no, no. 660 00:33:21,036 --> 00:33:22,501 Jan doesn't even know I left the house. 661 00:33:22,503 --> 00:33:23,900 I gotta get right back. 662 00:33:23,902 --> 00:33:25,867 -Okay. -I just... 663 00:33:25,869 --> 00:33:27,167 You're both in shock. 664 00:33:27,169 --> 00:33:28,534 -Yeah. -That's all. 665 00:33:28,536 --> 00:33:29,933 It's okay. 666 00:33:29,935 --> 00:33:31,601 And I just wanted to tell you one thing. 667 00:33:31,603 --> 00:33:34,034 -Okay. -Well, two things. 668 00:33:34,036 --> 00:33:35,102 One... 669 00:33:37,236 --> 00:33:40,436 Give yourself the grace... 670 00:33:41,403 --> 00:33:43,136 to feel what you feel. 671 00:33:44,069 --> 00:33:45,501 Unfiltered. 672 00:33:45,503 --> 00:33:47,136 And number two... 673 00:33:48,835 --> 00:33:51,167 The Olympics are here in two years. 674 00:33:51,169 --> 00:33:52,833 Oh, my God. 675 00:33:52,835 --> 00:33:54,369 Marilyn, fuck you! 676 00:33:56,869 --> 00:33:58,434 -But I get it. -Do you? 677 00:33:58,436 --> 00:33:59,501 I get it. 678 00:33:59,503 --> 00:34:01,503 I think so. Come here. 679 00:34:05,236 --> 00:34:06,268 Are you gonna start fucking? 680 00:34:06,270 --> 00:34:07,167 Immediately. 681 00:34:07,169 --> 00:34:08,867 Yes! 682 00:34:08,869 --> 00:34:10,401 New dick. That's what you need. 683 00:34:10,403 --> 00:34:11,933 Some new deep dickin' too. 684 00:34:11,935 --> 00:34:13,167 No pity fucks. 685 00:34:13,169 --> 00:34:15,000 Maybe that's what you need. 686 00:34:15,002 --> 00:34:16,900 It's like the one good thing Balls and I have left. 687 00:34:16,902 --> 00:34:17,902 Really? 688 00:34:18,236 --> 00:34:20,100 Y'all ever fuck sober? 689 00:34:20,102 --> 00:34:22,100 No. I hate him too much to be able to do that. 690 00:34:22,102 --> 00:34:23,270 Well, that's a red flag. 691 00:34:24,102 --> 00:34:25,169 No duh. 692 00:34:25,469 --> 00:34:27,169 Hey. 693 00:34:28,069 --> 00:34:29,969 I'm gonna play for a club team, again. 694 00:34:31,403 --> 00:34:34,102 And I've been reaching out to people about coaching. 695 00:34:34,902 --> 00:34:37,369 -I just worry. -About what? 696 00:34:37,969 --> 00:34:40,336 Look, you have a full life. 697 00:34:40,935 --> 00:34:44,000 You're not defined by this one amazing thing you did. 698 00:34:44,002 --> 00:34:45,935 So, I just hope... 699 00:34:46,436 --> 00:34:50,567 that enough time has passed that you can re-enter this world, 700 00:34:50,569 --> 00:34:52,434 without giving it too much meaning. 701 00:34:52,436 --> 00:34:54,167 Yeah, but I'm not gonna be able to do that 702 00:34:54,169 --> 00:34:55,434 now that you said it out loud. 703 00:34:55,436 --> 00:34:57,067 I'm just reminding you, babe, 704 00:34:57,069 --> 00:34:58,501 you have done other amazing things. 705 00:34:58,503 --> 00:34:59,467 Like? 706 00:34:59,469 --> 00:35:01,401 Like being a mother. 707 00:35:01,403 --> 00:35:03,067 Like this house. 708 00:35:03,069 --> 00:35:05,569 I don't give a fuck about volleyball. You're great. 709 00:35:27,237 --> 00:35:28,369 Come on, puppies. 710 00:35:29,935 --> 00:35:31,169 Come on, babies. 711 00:35:32,869 --> 00:35:35,134 Come on, Charlie. Charlie, come to me. 712 00:35:35,136 --> 00:35:36,902 Come, Charlie. Yeah. 713 00:35:37,403 --> 00:35:39,102 Yes, baby. 714 00:35:40,869 --> 00:35:41,969 Come on. Come on. 715 00:35:42,902 --> 00:35:44,136 Yeah. 716 00:35:59,902 --> 00:36:01,933 -Don't move. -Hi, Mom. 717 00:36:01,935 --> 00:36:03,567 -Hey. -Are you lice free yet? 718 00:36:03,569 --> 00:36:06,069 -Yeah, I mean, I got it, but... -Mom. Mom, mom, mom! 719 00:36:06,336 --> 00:36:08,270 This guy's good. I'm just checking this guy. 720 00:36:08,902 --> 00:36:10,367 We're probably gonna have to check each other. 721 00:36:10,369 --> 00:36:12,034 -He's gonna give you lice. -Ew, that's disgusting. 722 00:36:12,036 --> 00:36:13,933 I gotta see if we... 723 00:36:13,935 --> 00:36:15,567 I can't tell if that's dandruff or... 724 00:36:15,569 --> 00:36:17,467 You got some more paper towels? 725 00:36:17,469 --> 00:36:19,601 I do have more paper towels. Just did a Costco run. 726 00:36:19,603 --> 00:36:21,367 There should some in the bedroom in the back. 727 00:36:21,369 --> 00:36:22,933 All right. 728 00:36:22,935 --> 00:36:24,135 -Dad, why do you have-- -See what I mean? 729 00:36:24,137 --> 00:36:25,534 Why are they in a doctor's office? 730 00:36:25,536 --> 00:36:28,469 So, you... using our old armoire? 731 00:36:29,536 --> 00:36:31,933 Yeah, I took it out of storage until I get some more furniture. 732 00:36:31,935 --> 00:36:33,034 Why, you want me to put it back? 733 00:36:33,036 --> 00:36:34,534 Immediately. 734 00:36:34,536 --> 00:36:37,000 No, it's just that hadn't talked about that kind of stuff. 735 00:36:37,002 --> 00:36:39,067 Yeah. Sorry. Probably should have asked first. 736 00:36:39,069 --> 00:36:40,403 It's fine. 737 00:36:41,469 --> 00:36:44,000 So, what do you think about your new style? 738 00:36:44,002 --> 00:36:45,268 You know what, I gotta get more paper towels. 739 00:36:45,270 --> 00:36:46,401 I think we should just go with this. 740 00:36:46,403 --> 00:36:47,334 -All the time. -Don't move. Don't move. 741 00:36:47,336 --> 00:36:49,000 -All right? -Don't move. 742 00:36:49,002 --> 00:36:49,469 You're lice-free, and we'll just keep this look. 743 00:36:54,303 --> 00:36:55,967 I think I might have lice. 744 00:36:55,969 --> 00:36:57,501 Hmm. 745 00:36:57,503 --> 00:36:59,534 Any-- Aren't you seeing it jump off me? Why are you-- 746 00:36:59,536 --> 00:37:01,034 Yeah, let's get you in the chair. 747 00:37:01,036 --> 00:37:02,501 I think that's what we gotta do. 748 00:37:02,503 --> 00:37:04,135 Yeah, you look-- One just crawled in between-- 749 00:37:04,137 --> 00:37:05,867 -No-- -Mom's pregnant. 750 00:37:05,869 --> 00:37:06,933 -You are so pregnant. -What? 751 00:37:06,935 --> 00:37:08,268 You hooked up with a bug. 752 00:37:08,270 --> 00:37:10,168 -All right, guys, enough. -Guys. 753 00:37:10,170 --> 00:37:11,467 But Dad, that's how you said you get lice. 754 00:37:11,469 --> 00:37:13,168 -Yeah... yeah. -Oh, is that how you said it? 755 00:37:13,170 --> 00:37:15,900 No. It's bec-- It was a joke, because the video said 756 00:37:15,902 --> 00:37:17,068 we're looking for baby eggs, all right? 757 00:37:17,070 --> 00:37:18,334 It was a joke. 758 00:37:18,336 --> 00:37:19,933 -Did you hook up with a bug? -No. 759 00:37:19,935 --> 00:37:22,168 -Well, you've got lice so... -Yeah, you did. 760 00:37:22,170 --> 00:37:24,135 -You hooked up with a bug -You promised not to tell them. 761 00:37:24,137 --> 00:37:26,367 -You have lice, too. -Yeah, sorry. I couldn't resist. 762 00:37:26,369 --> 00:37:27,833 All right, you know what? You guys need to rehearse. 763 00:37:27,835 --> 00:37:29,434 -Let's go. Let's go. -Okay. 764 00:37:29,436 --> 00:37:31,034 -Get busy. -I already know it. 765 00:37:31,036 --> 00:37:33,268 -Keep the volume down, too. -Turn the volume up? Okay. 766 00:37:33,270 --> 00:37:34,833 No, not up. Keep the volume down. 767 00:37:34,835 --> 00:37:35,501 Dad, do you know where the loudspeaker is? 768 00:37:35,503 --> 00:37:36,601 I'm serious about the volume 769 00:37:36,603 --> 00:37:38,334 So you're really not seeing anything? 770 00:37:38,336 --> 00:37:40,935 -There's no little bites or... -I don't think so. 771 00:37:41,436 --> 00:37:43,101 To be honest, just looking-- 772 00:37:43,103 --> 00:37:44,567 Now, it's making me itch. I think I-- 773 00:37:44,569 --> 00:37:45,902 I must have it. Would you check me? 774 00:37:46,469 --> 00:37:47,569 Sure. 775 00:37:49,835 --> 00:37:51,434 You can get like little bites or... 776 00:37:51,436 --> 00:37:53,467 Yeah, make sure to really check. 777 00:37:53,469 --> 00:37:55,035 Yeah. 778 00:37:55,037 --> 00:37:56,802 "Under Pressure"? 779 00:37:57,869 --> 00:37:59,835 Oh. That's what that is. 780 00:38:01,037 --> 00:38:02,434 You didn't recognize it? 781 00:38:02,436 --> 00:38:04,867 No. The first 40 million times I didn't recognize it. 782 00:38:04,869 --> 00:38:06,336 They're obsessed. 783 00:38:06,969 --> 00:38:08,168 It's all they talk about. 784 00:38:08,170 --> 00:38:09,833 That performance is so far from now too. 785 00:38:09,835 --> 00:38:11,967 I wonder where they get their work ethic from. 786 00:38:11,969 --> 00:38:13,536 Mm. Poor boys. 787 00:38:14,569 --> 00:38:16,503 Just check one more in here. 788 00:38:20,503 --> 00:38:25,070 I'm gonna dip my toe into the coaching world. 789 00:38:27,336 --> 00:38:28,902 Is that why you were in the city? 790 00:38:29,869 --> 00:38:32,070 No. I was in the city 'cause you called me. 791 00:38:33,436 --> 00:38:35,401 Oh. I just figured you were in the city, 792 00:38:35,403 --> 00:38:37,168 because you said you'd come right over. 793 00:38:37,170 --> 00:38:39,334 Yeah. I wanted to see the halfway house 794 00:38:39,336 --> 00:38:41,135 our kids are living in part time. 795 00:38:41,137 --> 00:38:42,601 I'm glad you got the vibe that I'm going for. 796 00:38:42,603 --> 00:38:44,070 Yeah, you did great. 797 00:38:44,835 --> 00:38:47,902 I haven't talked to any programs yet, just... 798 00:38:50,835 --> 00:38:52,168 I think that's great. 799 00:38:52,170 --> 00:38:54,003 Any program would die to have you, I'm sure. 800 00:38:54,569 --> 00:38:56,070 Yeah. 801 00:38:56,503 --> 00:38:57,569 I think it's great, too. 802 00:39:00,237 --> 00:39:02,369 Um, I think you're good. 803 00:39:03,436 --> 00:39:05,003 Good. Okay. 804 00:39:06,170 --> 00:39:07,534 Do you wanna take a shower with-- 805 00:39:07,536 --> 00:39:10,101 and rinse off with some of that special shampoo? 806 00:39:10,103 --> 00:39:11,201 Oh, oh... 807 00:39:11,203 --> 00:39:12,101 -Might as well. -Yeah. 808 00:39:12,103 --> 00:39:13,367 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 809 00:39:13,369 --> 00:39:15,003 Bathroom's right down there on the left. 810 00:40:01,103 --> 00:40:02,469 You got this. 811 00:40:04,170 --> 00:40:05,601 So I read that the number one 812 00:40:05,603 --> 00:40:06,968 fantasy for guys... 813 00:40:06,970 --> 00:40:07,668 -Can I help you? -Hey, man. 814 00:40:07,670 --> 00:40:09,268 Yeah, I'm here for the open mic. 815 00:40:09,270 --> 00:40:10,968 Yeah, right here. Just write your name down there. 816 00:40:10,970 --> 00:40:11,934 Okay. 817 00:40:11,936 --> 00:40:12,970 You're next. 818 00:40:13,137 --> 00:40:14,270 -I'm next? -Yup, be ready. 819 00:40:15,070 --> 00:40:16,301 Fuck. 820 00:40:16,303 --> 00:40:17,401 I'm getting the light, so I gotta go. 821 00:40:17,403 --> 00:40:18,567 Oh, the light. The light. 822 00:40:18,569 --> 00:40:20,037 The light. Yeah, the light. 823 00:40:33,369 --> 00:40:35,170 Ladies and gentlemen... 824 00:40:38,503 --> 00:40:39,968 -Yo, man. What's up? -Hey. 825 00:40:39,970 --> 00:40:41,201 I was actually hoping that I could just, 826 00:40:41,203 --> 00:40:42,501 you know, watch and hang tonight? 827 00:40:42,503 --> 00:40:45,101 -Yeah. -Yeah? I got 15 bucks on me. 828 00:40:45,103 --> 00:40:47,868 Nah. Keep your 15 bucks. Get yourself something nice. 829 00:40:47,870 --> 00:40:49,467 -Go on in. -Thanks, man. 830 00:40:49,469 --> 00:40:52,070 You got it-- Just... Yeah, just finish that before you go in. 831 00:40:53,137 --> 00:40:54,536 -Finish it? -Yeah. 832 00:40:55,469 --> 00:40:57,934 -Hey. -Hey. 833 00:40:57,936 --> 00:40:58,970 -There he is. -Make yourself comfortable. 834 00:40:59,536 --> 00:41:01,135 Am I okay here? 835 00:41:01,137 --> 00:41:03,035 -Yeah. No one's sittin' here. -You're fine. 836 00:41:03,037 --> 00:41:04,103 How was your night? 837 00:41:04,536 --> 00:41:06,003 It was pretty good. 838 00:41:06,336 --> 00:41:09,237 I went and did a different open mic and... 839 00:41:11,336 --> 00:41:12,834 Yeah. 840 00:41:12,836 --> 00:41:14,301 You know, I've been doing this for 25 years. 841 00:41:14,303 --> 00:41:15,567 You know what I mean? And I love it. 842 00:41:15,569 --> 00:41:17,035 I wouldn't wanna be anywhere else. 843 00:41:17,037 --> 00:41:19,068 But what I like about you is you're so innocent. 844 00:41:19,070 --> 00:41:20,268 You're not naive, you're innocent. 845 00:41:20,270 --> 00:41:21,567 And that's why it works. 846 00:41:21,569 --> 00:41:23,168 So that's good. It comes outta your head, 847 00:41:23,170 --> 00:41:24,501 you put it on a piece of paper, and you get up there. 848 00:41:24,503 --> 00:41:26,567 It's like therapy. But, people can relate to that. 849 00:41:26,569 --> 00:41:27,868 -I don't know what it is. -You don't know anything. 850 00:41:27,870 --> 00:41:29,467 But I just do know that coming here 851 00:41:29,469 --> 00:41:32,068 -has ended up making me feel... -Yeah. It's a safe space. 852 00:41:32,070 --> 00:41:33,037 -Well, a lot better. -Yeah. 853 00:41:34,037 --> 00:41:35,035 You are good-- I mean, you're bad at stand-up, 854 00:41:35,037 --> 00:41:36,467 but you're good. 855 00:41:36,469 --> 00:41:39,101 You have a good heart. You seem like a pure... 856 00:41:39,103 --> 00:41:40,934 like I believe you that you just found this thing, 857 00:41:40,936 --> 00:41:43,068 and now you're in love with stand-up. 858 00:41:43,070 --> 00:41:45,534 Other than the fact that I'm really insulted, thank you. 859 00:41:45,536 --> 00:41:48,035 But you're bad. You're really bad. 860 00:41:48,037 --> 00:41:49,301 Okay. 861 00:41:49,303 --> 00:41:50,834 So I was waxing. It didn't hurt, right? 862 00:41:50,836 --> 00:41:52,501 And then she finished really quickly, 863 00:41:52,503 --> 00:41:54,101 like I didn't even know what happened. 864 00:41:54,103 --> 00:41:56,970 And I was like, she goes, "Your triangle's done." Okay. 865 00:41:57,336 --> 00:41:59,334 "Your triangle's done." 866 00:41:59,336 --> 00:42:00,567 What she gave me... 867 00:42:00,569 --> 00:42:02,403 Okay, wait. Can I use your napkin? 868 00:42:03,870 --> 00:42:06,601 What I was expecting was this. 869 00:42:06,603 --> 00:42:08,970 This is what, what I was expecting. Okay? 870 00:42:09,203 --> 00:42:12,101 You see this? Reasonable. Reasonable. 871 00:42:12,103 --> 00:42:14,469 What she gave me... 872 00:42:22,103 --> 00:42:23,170 ...is this. 873 00:42:24,070 --> 00:42:26,567 -It is ridi-- Look at this. -No! 874 00:42:26,569 --> 00:42:28,301 Look at what I'm showing you. 875 00:42:28,303 --> 00:42:31,235 I'm not-- This is not-- It is tiny. 876 00:42:31,237 --> 00:42:33,270 Well, I brought my drink up. Um... 877 00:42:33,970 --> 00:42:35,534 -It's okay. -Is that all right? 878 00:42:35,536 --> 00:42:37,334 Hang on. Do you guys mind? I'm gonna put this right here. 879 00:42:37,336 --> 00:42:38,968 Use it! 880 00:42:38,970 --> 00:42:41,467 You okay? I'm watching it, all right? So, don't-- 881 00:42:41,469 --> 00:42:43,367 Oh, please roofie me. 882 00:42:43,369 --> 00:42:44,868 Oh. 883 00:42:44,870 --> 00:42:47,001 Please, I'd love to get roofie'd tonight. 884 00:42:47,003 --> 00:42:48,870 Please! 885 00:42:49,303 --> 00:42:52,467 Hey, is it true that you do magic? Is that a true story? 886 00:42:52,469 --> 00:42:54,601 Yes. That is my day job. 887 00:42:54,603 --> 00:42:57,068 One of my kids, he's obsessed with-with magic. 888 00:42:57,070 --> 00:42:58,567 -Oh, no. -Yeah, his birthday's coming up, 889 00:42:58,569 --> 00:42:59,968 and his mom's doing this thing, 890 00:42:59,970 --> 00:43:01,235 and I want to kinda add something to it. 891 00:43:01,237 --> 00:43:03,868 Would you ever consider doing something like that? Is that...? 892 00:43:03,870 --> 00:43:05,434 -Uh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. -Yeah? 893 00:43:05,436 --> 00:43:06,369 -I'd be down. Sure. -Okay. 894 00:43:12,903 --> 00:43:14,070 The driveway's okay? 895 00:43:16,270 --> 00:43:18,903 Okay in front of the driveway. They're not going anywhere. 896 00:43:29,137 --> 00:43:30,536 Shit doesn't even look gold. 897 00:43:32,170 --> 00:43:33,369 I should have picked the balloons. 898 00:43:37,170 --> 00:43:39,037 What? 899 00:43:39,369 --> 00:43:40,934 -Hey! -Hey. Hey. 900 00:43:40,936 --> 00:43:42,035 What are you doing out here? The door was open. 901 00:43:42,037 --> 00:43:42,601 I didn't know what the protocol was. 902 00:43:42,603 --> 00:43:44,101 What? Get in here. 903 00:43:44,103 --> 00:43:46,268 You guys all right? 904 00:43:46,270 --> 00:43:47,601 Wow. 905 00:43:47,603 --> 00:43:49,201 -It's gonna be so good. -You really went all out. 906 00:43:49,203 --> 00:43:51,436 Hey, will you help me actually put some more food out? 907 00:43:52,170 --> 00:43:53,868 Crudités in the fridge. 908 00:43:53,870 --> 00:43:55,301 -There's two of 'em. -Okay. 909 00:43:55,303 --> 00:43:57,235 I just really need the carrots 910 00:43:57,237 --> 00:43:59,001 because they have not touched one vegetable. 911 00:43:59,003 --> 00:44:02,201 Hi, buddy. Oh, hey. Hi, hi, hi. You having fun? 912 00:44:02,203 --> 00:44:03,434 -Yeah. -Yeah? How's the magician? 913 00:44:03,436 --> 00:44:04,569 -Good. -Yeah? 914 00:44:05,103 --> 00:44:07,201 Your father's sorry he couldn't make it. 915 00:44:07,203 --> 00:44:09,235 -He's on one of his walks. -Okay. 916 00:44:09,237 --> 00:44:11,936 Hey! There he is. 917 00:44:13,303 --> 00:44:14,903 Hey, Charlie doesn't like to be picked up. 918 00:44:15,603 --> 00:44:17,101 Is that his name? 919 00:44:17,103 --> 00:44:18,068 Yeah. Did you really not know Charlie's name? 920 00:44:18,070 --> 00:44:19,401 No. 921 00:44:19,403 --> 00:44:21,168 -After all this time? -Dude, you look so good. 922 00:44:21,170 --> 00:44:22,367 -For real? -Yeah, yeah. 923 00:44:22,369 --> 00:44:24,068 Is that-- You look-- Did you lose weight? 924 00:44:24,070 --> 00:44:25,367 Is that a new sweater? 925 00:44:25,369 --> 00:44:27,834 Honestly, no, I've had this sweater for... 926 00:44:27,836 --> 00:44:29,268 Well, you should keep wearing it. 927 00:44:29,270 --> 00:44:31,001 It's the guilt eating away at you, I'm sure. 928 00:44:31,003 --> 00:44:32,268 -The guilt? -Christine. 929 00:44:32,270 --> 00:44:33,334 -What? -Don't say that. 930 00:44:33,336 --> 00:44:35,035 What? 931 00:44:35,037 --> 00:44:36,901 Guilt about what? What are you talking about, Christine? 932 00:44:36,903 --> 00:44:38,201 Is that your name? 933 00:44:38,203 --> 00:44:40,135 Christine, have I done something to offend you? 934 00:44:40,137 --> 00:44:42,567 Because if I have, or like upset you or something, then I'm-- 935 00:44:42,569 --> 00:44:44,035 No, no, no. You know what? Forget it. 936 00:44:44,037 --> 00:44:45,235 I'm not going to Oyster Bay. 937 00:44:45,237 --> 00:44:46,135 Don't apologize to me. What? 938 00:44:46,137 --> 00:44:47,201 -Guys. -Why not? 939 00:44:47,203 --> 00:44:48,467 -It's a birthday party. -Because. 940 00:44:48,469 --> 00:44:50,001 Go! Run, run, run! 941 00:44:50,003 --> 00:44:51,336 Go Judey, go Judey, go Jude! 942 00:44:53,237 --> 00:44:55,068 Oh, you got my... She got my... 943 00:44:55,070 --> 00:44:56,934 You're gonna be part of this trick, okay? 944 00:44:56,936 --> 00:44:58,101 -All right. -Can all three of us do it? 945 00:44:58,103 --> 00:44:59,268 -Yeah. -Yeah, 946 00:44:59,270 --> 00:45:00,903 all three of you can do it. Okay. 947 00:45:01,203 --> 00:45:03,569 -I think I took too much. -Honey. Oh. 948 00:45:05,237 --> 00:45:07,403 I didn't... I didn't know I was holding the dog. 949 00:45:08,503 --> 00:45:10,137 Well, this is pretty good. 950 00:45:11,436 --> 00:45:13,903 I'm not the reason you're not coming to Oyster Bay, am I? 951 00:45:15,270 --> 00:45:16,534 Oh, God, no. Not at all. 952 00:45:16,536 --> 00:45:18,168 I mean, 'cause we can all go. 953 00:45:18,170 --> 00:45:19,868 It doesn't have to be awkward. Right? 954 00:45:19,870 --> 00:45:22,868 No... you mean like it is now? 955 00:45:22,870 --> 00:45:25,602 Hey, sorry that I just kinda lost it earlier. 956 00:45:25,604 --> 00:45:26,567 I felt really attacked by all those guys. 957 00:45:26,569 --> 00:45:28,401 Yeah. 958 00:45:28,403 --> 00:45:29,301 I mean, why are we even talking about Oyster Bay now at all? 959 00:45:29,303 --> 00:45:31,268 -I know. -It's so far away. 960 00:45:31,270 --> 00:45:32,602 -They're crazy. -Those guys, 961 00:45:32,604 --> 00:45:33,968 you know they're psychos when it comes to planning. 962 00:45:33,970 --> 00:45:36,035 Yes. 963 00:45:36,037 --> 00:45:38,534 All I know is we made a couple wonderful boys. 964 00:45:38,536 --> 00:45:40,103 Right? 965 00:45:40,570 --> 00:45:41,970 Yeah. 966 00:45:44,003 --> 00:45:49,301 ♪ Happy birthday, dear Jude ♪ 967 00:45:49,303 --> 00:45:54,103 ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 968 00:46:43,203 --> 00:46:46,070 -You got it all over you. -I know! I-- 969 00:46:46,504 --> 00:46:48,469 You got it all over you, too. 970 00:46:49,137 --> 00:46:51,367 What does that have to do with, like, opening wine? 971 00:46:51,369 --> 00:46:52,836 -Hi. -Hi. 972 00:46:53,303 --> 00:46:54,434 Thank you so much for coming. 973 00:46:54,436 --> 00:46:54,901 Thank you so much for having me. 974 00:46:54,903 --> 00:46:56,502 You were awesome. 975 00:46:56,504 --> 00:46:57,535 -Yeah, I really appreciate it. -The kids loved it. 976 00:46:57,537 --> 00:46:58,568 -Hey, that was amazing. -Thank you. Thank you. 977 00:46:58,570 --> 00:46:59,602 Oh. My balance is off. 978 00:46:59,604 --> 00:47:00,968 -Nice to meet you. -You okay? 979 00:47:00,970 --> 00:47:01,434 -This is my buddy. -Nice to meet you. 980 00:47:01,436 --> 00:47:02,401 Balls. 981 00:47:02,403 --> 00:47:03,968 -Balls? -Yeah. 982 00:47:03,970 --> 00:47:05,434 Cool. Okay. 983 00:47:05,436 --> 00:47:06,401 Happens every time. 984 00:47:06,403 --> 00:47:07,504 Don't make my mom do that. 985 00:47:09,137 --> 00:47:11,334 -What happens every time? -Nothin'. 986 00:47:11,336 --> 00:47:12,470 Okay, what's the deal? 987 00:47:14,237 --> 00:47:15,901 You mean with why you still have that beard 988 00:47:15,903 --> 00:47:17,135 even though the play's been over for two months? 989 00:47:17,137 --> 00:47:18,901 I can't choose when the character leaves me. 990 00:47:18,903 --> 00:47:20,201 Characters, you mean. 991 00:47:20,203 --> 00:47:22,434 Actually, I feel like maybe it's providing, 992 00:47:22,436 --> 00:47:24,367 like, a new thing for casting directors, 993 00:47:24,369 --> 00:47:26,268 now that I'm working again. Thank you for coming by the way. 994 00:47:26,270 --> 00:47:27,968 Twice. I came twice. 995 00:47:27,970 --> 00:47:29,367 And you didn't even go on the second time. 996 00:47:29,369 --> 00:47:31,068 I know. 997 00:47:31,070 --> 00:47:34,568 It's because that asshole Paul said he was gonna be sick 998 00:47:34,570 --> 00:47:36,068 and then he showed up anyway. 999 00:47:36,070 --> 00:47:38,934 But I was psyched because he got St. Paul sick, 1000 00:47:38,936 --> 00:47:40,168 and I went up for two weeks straight. 1001 00:47:40,170 --> 00:47:41,901 -It was amazing. -Yeah, that's a bonus. 1002 00:47:41,903 --> 00:47:43,367 And people said that I was, like... 1003 00:47:43,369 --> 00:47:44,968 -Yeah. -...better. 1004 00:47:44,970 --> 00:47:46,101 -Than him? -Yeah. 1005 00:47:46,103 --> 00:47:47,268 Yeah. I bet. 1006 00:47:47,270 --> 00:47:48,968 -I got recognized on the street. -Did you? 1007 00:47:48,970 --> 00:47:51,001 Somebody literally thought I was a disciple. It was great. 1008 00:47:51,003 --> 00:47:53,237 But I think maybe they were, like, a Jesus freak. But... 1009 00:47:53,936 --> 00:47:55,367 They're not a fan of the play necessarily. 1010 00:47:55,369 --> 00:47:57,135 Well, they saw the play a lot. 1011 00:47:57,137 --> 00:48:00,435 I think they saw the play almost all the two weeks that I did it. 1012 00:48:00,437 --> 00:48:02,502 So, I didn't really tell them that I was the understudy. 1013 00:48:02,504 --> 00:48:04,268 -But anyway, this is about you. -Right. 1014 00:48:04,270 --> 00:48:07,303 Don't fucking... Don't fucking change the subject. 1015 00:48:09,403 --> 00:48:10,369 Let me rephrase it. 1016 00:48:11,570 --> 00:48:13,336 What's the deal, man? 1017 00:48:14,403 --> 00:48:16,303 Yeah, I don't know what to tell you, man. There is no deal. 1018 00:48:16,970 --> 00:48:18,103 Okay. 1019 00:48:18,604 --> 00:48:19,970 You don't want to tell me her name? 1020 00:48:22,170 --> 00:48:23,003 All right. 1021 00:48:25,369 --> 00:48:26,535 If I tell you something, you promise you won't tell anybody? 1022 00:48:26,537 --> 00:48:28,137 No. Keep going. What's her name? 1023 00:48:30,103 --> 00:48:31,369 I've been doing stand-up. 1024 00:48:32,037 --> 00:48:33,235 Oh. 1025 00:48:33,237 --> 00:48:34,535 I don't know who that is. 1026 00:48:34,537 --> 00:48:36,235 That's a crazy handle. What? Is she famous? 1027 00:48:36,237 --> 00:48:37,868 No, no, no. Dude, 1028 00:48:37,870 --> 00:48:40,201 I've been doing stand-up comedy on stage downtown. 1029 00:48:40,203 --> 00:48:41,103 Okay. 1030 00:48:42,237 --> 00:48:43,468 What? 1031 00:48:43,470 --> 00:48:44,504 Is it like a hobby? 1032 00:48:46,270 --> 00:48:48,502 Well, I'm not about to quit my job and go on tour. 1033 00:48:48,504 --> 00:48:49,369 Okay. 1034 00:48:52,103 --> 00:48:54,201 Yeah. It's just, I-I mean, I love it, man. 1035 00:48:54,203 --> 00:48:57,101 It's great. I-- You know, it's actually pretty amazing. 1036 00:48:57,103 --> 00:49:00,035 And it's terrifying, but I love every aspect of it, 1037 00:49:00,037 --> 00:49:01,968 and it's something I look forward to. 1038 00:49:01,970 --> 00:49:03,070 -Fuck. -What? 1039 00:49:08,470 --> 00:49:09,303 I knew it. 1040 00:49:10,936 --> 00:49:11,570 Knew what? 1041 00:49:13,203 --> 00:49:15,370 Just like... 1042 00:49:18,404 --> 00:49:21,135 You've always been the funniest guy in the room forever, right? 1043 00:49:21,137 --> 00:49:22,535 Ever since college, 1044 00:49:22,537 --> 00:49:24,101 and now that you're actually fucking pursuing it... 1045 00:49:24,103 --> 00:49:25,335 I'm not pursing anything. 1046 00:49:25,337 --> 00:49:27,103 You're gonna kill it. It's inevitable. 1047 00:49:27,870 --> 00:49:32,570 And it kills me that I hate it so much because I-I have... 1048 00:49:33,203 --> 00:49:34,901 ...always gotten comfort 1049 00:49:34,903 --> 00:49:36,101 in knowing that you settled. 1050 00:49:36,103 --> 00:49:37,370 That you're a settler. 1051 00:49:39,070 --> 00:49:41,870 And I-I'm the guy who... 1052 00:49:43,370 --> 00:49:45,934 Even though, you know, is going for it. That's my thing. 1053 00:49:45,936 --> 00:49:47,502 Jesus, Balls. 1054 00:49:47,504 --> 00:49:49,568 I know. It's been a lot for me to carry around. 1055 00:49:49,570 --> 00:49:51,301 Just so nothing gets misconstrued, 1056 00:49:51,303 --> 00:49:52,568 I don't have a girlfriend. 1057 00:49:52,570 --> 00:49:54,335 -Oh, you do whatever you want. -I don't. 1058 00:49:54,337 --> 00:49:55,435 Look, it doesn't matter. 1059 00:49:55,437 --> 00:49:56,602 You don't have to justify yourself. 1060 00:49:56,604 --> 00:49:58,268 You're famous now, anyway. So, whatevs. 1061 00:49:58,270 --> 00:49:59,502 What are you talking about, man? 1062 00:49:59,504 --> 00:50:01,035 Look, you don't have to justify yourself. 1063 00:50:01,037 --> 00:50:02,103 Listen to me. To anybody. 1064 00:50:02,437 --> 00:50:04,101 Not to Tess, not to anybody. 1065 00:50:04,103 --> 00:50:06,836 Just like Tess doesn't have to justify herself to you. 1066 00:50:07,537 --> 00:50:08,504 Justify what? 1067 00:50:10,970 --> 00:50:12,003 Nothing. 1068 00:50:12,437 --> 00:50:15,001 -Is Tess seeing someone? -No. 1069 00:50:15,003 --> 00:50:16,201 I mean, is she open to it? 1070 00:50:16,203 --> 00:50:17,235 I wouldn't know. I don't think so. 1071 00:50:17,237 --> 00:50:19,304 But is she? Yeah. Maybe. 1072 00:50:20,270 --> 00:50:21,435 Did Christine say something? 1073 00:50:21,437 --> 00:50:22,568 Who? 1074 00:50:22,570 --> 00:50:23,504 Christine? 1075 00:50:24,470 --> 00:50:25,568 Ab-About what? 1076 00:50:25,570 --> 00:50:27,101 About Tess seeing somebody. 1077 00:50:27,103 --> 00:50:28,137 No. Did she? 1078 00:50:28,504 --> 00:50:29,504 I'm asking you. 1079 00:50:31,370 --> 00:50:32,901 -What are you-- -Well, did you hear anything? 1080 00:50:32,903 --> 00:50:34,068 What did Christine say about it? 1081 00:50:34,070 --> 00:50:35,504 What did she say? 1082 00:50:35,936 --> 00:50:37,271 Dude, I'm asking you. 1083 00:50:41,870 --> 00:50:44,269 Hey, Olga? I just put a bunch of trash there. 1084 00:50:44,271 --> 00:50:46,068 -Is there anything else? -No. All good. Thank you. 1085 00:50:46,070 --> 00:50:47,836 Good. Okay. Thank you. 1086 00:50:51,170 --> 00:50:52,037 Hey. 1087 00:50:53,537 --> 00:50:55,070 -Yeah? -Are you leaving? 1088 00:50:57,337 --> 00:50:58,903 I was just finishing cleaning up. 1089 00:51:00,237 --> 00:51:01,570 Yeah, I-I gotta go. 1090 00:51:10,836 --> 00:51:11,903 How you doing? 1091 00:51:13,404 --> 00:51:14,570 All right. 1092 00:51:17,404 --> 00:51:19,868 Oh, man. I'm Alex. 1093 00:51:19,870 --> 00:51:21,137 How's everybody feeling tonight? 1094 00:51:22,203 --> 00:51:24,203 Good. I'm feeling pretty good. 1095 00:51:25,103 --> 00:51:28,468 I, uh-- I'm recently separated from my wife. 1096 00:51:28,470 --> 00:51:30,970 No. Oh, thank you. 1097 00:51:32,404 --> 00:51:37,168 And, uh, I think that she's maybe seeing someone. 1098 00:51:37,170 --> 00:51:38,535 Yeah, I just found out the possibility 1099 00:51:38,537 --> 00:51:40,001 that she's seeing someone, 1100 00:51:40,003 --> 00:51:41,834 and I'm handling it just fine, I think. 1101 00:51:41,836 --> 00:51:44,135 Right? And, uh... 1102 00:51:44,137 --> 00:51:46,502 So I just made up a list of, uh... 1103 00:51:46,504 --> 00:51:49,803 possible worst case scenarios, which I think is really healthy. 1104 00:51:50,037 --> 00:51:51,535 Number one. 1105 00:51:51,537 --> 00:51:54,537 This guy is a radiologist. 1106 00:51:55,003 --> 00:51:58,771 Because that would mean he's knowledgeable, 1107 00:51:59,238 --> 00:52:03,037 he's noble, and he makes a ton of money. 1108 00:52:03,836 --> 00:52:07,435 Terrible. So, that's number one. Number two. He surfs. 1109 00:52:07,437 --> 00:52:09,168 Because surfing is so fucking cool, 1110 00:52:09,170 --> 00:52:12,269 and those guys seem like they're really cool, 1111 00:52:12,271 --> 00:52:14,568 and that they, like, can do anything, 1112 00:52:14,570 --> 00:52:17,269 and they drive old trucks. 1113 00:52:17,271 --> 00:52:19,936 You know, and they don't care, they never wear shoes. 1114 00:52:20,504 --> 00:52:23,470 And, uh, they never met a jar they couldn't open. 1115 00:52:23,970 --> 00:52:25,468 You know what I mean? 1116 00:52:25,470 --> 00:52:27,901 And they don't need to cut their hair, or do anything. 1117 00:52:27,903 --> 00:52:30,337 And they're always suntanned. Um... 1118 00:52:30,836 --> 00:52:32,901 And they look like they got really strong forearms, 1119 00:52:32,903 --> 00:52:34,001 you know? 1120 00:52:34,003 --> 00:52:36,568 Which is, thinking about, um, 1121 00:52:36,570 --> 00:52:38,834 someone you love, like a lady you love, 1122 00:52:38,836 --> 00:52:40,903 with a guy with really strong forearms. 1123 00:52:42,238 --> 00:52:46,304 Uh, my forearms are basically atrophied. Um... 1124 00:52:47,370 --> 00:52:49,970 No, that's not true. I actually do work out a fair bit. 1125 00:52:50,870 --> 00:52:54,136 I've got, um, what I would describe as, um, 1126 00:52:54,138 --> 00:52:56,337 and a lot of ladies would describe, as a dad bod. 1127 00:52:59,171 --> 00:53:02,435 By the way, it occurs to me that men have done a really good job 1128 00:53:02,437 --> 00:53:06,537 of convincing women that dad bods are a good thing. 1129 00:53:07,204 --> 00:53:09,502 You know? Like, we go, like, "Oh, he's got a dad bod." 1130 00:53:09,504 --> 00:53:13,934 We're like, "Okay." It's like we all got together and conspired. 1131 00:53:13,936 --> 00:53:15,335 You know what I mean? Anyway. 1132 00:53:15,337 --> 00:53:16,602 Um... 1133 00:53:16,604 --> 00:53:20,171 So, yeah, so... radiologist, surfer. 1134 00:53:21,504 --> 00:53:24,271 Nightmare if he was a surfing radiologist. 1135 00:53:25,437 --> 00:53:28,070 Because that would be... that would be... 1136 00:53:34,570 --> 00:53:37,934 It would, like-- Like, what, he's gonna pull up to my house 1137 00:53:37,936 --> 00:53:41,502 with his dumb, beautiful Porsche. 1138 00:53:41,504 --> 00:53:45,204 Um, and take her out on-- on a date? 1139 00:53:47,337 --> 00:53:48,271 I mean... 1140 00:53:50,037 --> 00:53:52,238 Jill, this is where I got stuck. 1141 00:53:53,138 --> 00:53:54,535 Keep-- Keep going? 1142 00:53:54,537 --> 00:53:55,970 Yeah, I don't... Okay. 1143 00:53:56,504 --> 00:53:58,069 This is the... 1144 00:53:58,071 --> 00:54:00,001 What did I write on my thing after...? 1145 00:54:00,003 --> 00:54:01,169 You wrote-- 1146 00:54:01,171 --> 00:54:03,368 What did I say after I take them, uh... 1147 00:54:03,370 --> 00:54:04,335 I take them on a date? 1148 00:54:04,337 --> 00:54:05,502 It's right there on the thing. 1149 00:54:05,504 --> 00:54:07,335 It says "I have small penis." 1150 00:54:07,337 --> 00:54:09,202 It does not say I have a small penis! 1151 00:54:09,204 --> 00:54:11,238 "I have a very small penis." 1152 00:54:13,003 --> 00:54:14,468 Oh, I follow them. 1153 00:54:14,470 --> 00:54:16,535 I follow them. I follow them. Thank you very much. 1154 00:54:16,537 --> 00:54:17,602 -You're welcome. -That's my friend Jill 1155 00:54:17,604 --> 00:54:19,468 who's very helpful, um... 1156 00:54:19,470 --> 00:54:21,236 By the way, if I had a small penis, 1157 00:54:21,238 --> 00:54:23,169 I wouldn't need to remind myself. 1158 00:54:23,171 --> 00:54:25,602 I feel like I would, um... 1159 00:54:25,604 --> 00:54:27,169 By the way, I don't. 1160 00:54:27,171 --> 00:54:28,271 Anyway. 1161 00:54:30,337 --> 00:54:31,970 I don't know. Uh... 1162 00:54:32,470 --> 00:54:33,504 And... 1163 00:54:34,104 --> 00:54:35,337 So, anyway... 1164 00:54:36,903 --> 00:54:38,968 I-I left you a little something. 1165 00:54:38,970 --> 00:54:42,001 Just to for you to remember to have confidence. 1166 00:54:42,003 --> 00:54:44,535 The folder is unacceptable. Bright yellow? 1167 00:54:44,537 --> 00:54:46,302 Why? This is where I keep everything organized. 1168 00:54:46,304 --> 00:54:50,036 It's just, "I'm a dad coming to--" We don't do that. 1169 00:54:50,038 --> 00:54:52,535 We have it in here, like adults. 1170 00:54:52,537 --> 00:54:55,102 I like the way that you even wrote it in uppercase 1171 00:54:55,104 --> 00:54:56,602 just to make sure that it looks like I wrote it. 1172 00:54:56,604 --> 00:54:58,102 -Like a dude wrote it. -Yeah, yeah. 1173 00:54:58,104 --> 00:55:00,934 I embossed it. I matched your handwriting. 1174 00:55:00,936 --> 00:55:03,370 It's untraceable. To me. 1175 00:55:05,104 --> 00:55:07,934 I think we should fuck. I think we should fuck. 1176 00:55:07,936 --> 00:55:09,335 -You and me? -Yeah. 1177 00:55:09,337 --> 00:55:11,202 Is that crazy? I think we should fuck. 1178 00:55:11,204 --> 00:55:12,304 Is that crazy? 1179 00:55:12,537 --> 00:55:14,071 We're gonna fuck. 1180 00:55:43,936 --> 00:55:45,071 Are you a nurse? 1181 00:55:45,903 --> 00:55:47,435 No, I'm a comedian. 1182 00:55:47,437 --> 00:55:48,934 Are you a fucking nurse? 1183 00:55:48,936 --> 00:55:50,138 Don't let my cat out. 1184 00:56:09,437 --> 00:56:10,969 Jill? 1185 00:56:10,971 --> 00:56:13,271 And don't answer my buzzer. 1186 00:56:21,370 --> 00:56:24,002 I understand it now, so I'm good. 1187 00:56:24,004 --> 00:56:25,302 Same. 1188 00:56:25,304 --> 00:56:26,169 No, you don't understand it now, dude. 1189 00:56:26,171 --> 00:56:27,834 Yes, I do, anyways. 1190 00:56:27,836 --> 00:56:29,901 You guys gonna crush this "Under Pressure" thing or what? 1191 00:56:29,903 --> 00:56:31,602 -Gonna crush it. -You're screwing me up. 1192 00:56:31,604 --> 00:56:33,136 -Dad? -Yeah? 1193 00:56:33,138 --> 00:56:35,370 -Are you sad? -No. Why, do I look sad? 1194 00:56:39,470 --> 00:56:42,568 Hey! No, hey, hey. What the fuck, guys? 1195 00:56:42,570 --> 00:56:44,004 Sorry. 1196 00:56:45,104 --> 00:56:47,902 Guys, where'd you find this? 1197 00:56:47,904 --> 00:56:48,902 -By your bed. -By your bed. 1198 00:56:48,904 --> 00:56:50,402 Like where the stand is. 1199 00:56:50,404 --> 00:56:52,935 Okay. You're not supposed to touch other people's stuff. 1200 00:56:52,937 --> 00:56:54,468 But it was like, right on your side table. 1201 00:56:54,470 --> 00:56:56,502 -I know, I know, I know. -It's right where I sleep. 1202 00:56:56,504 --> 00:56:57,902 I know, but when peop-- 1203 00:56:57,904 --> 00:56:59,036 It was right next to where we sleep. 1204 00:56:59,038 --> 00:57:00,435 I know, but when people leave stuff-- 1205 00:57:00,437 --> 00:57:02,302 When it's other people's personal property 1206 00:57:02,304 --> 00:57:03,902 that's obviously their property, 1207 00:57:03,904 --> 00:57:05,335 you don't touch it, okay? 1208 00:57:05,337 --> 00:57:07,069 Like, that's just like a rule in life. 1209 00:57:07,071 --> 00:57:08,435 Yeah, but it's weird. Like, really weird. 1210 00:57:08,437 --> 00:57:10,271 Okay, I know. But it's just... 1211 00:57:10,937 --> 00:57:13,204 It's just a joke book, okay? 1212 00:57:14,204 --> 00:57:15,437 Jokes? 1213 00:57:15,971 --> 00:57:18,537 No, more like... just maybe... 1214 00:57:20,071 --> 00:57:21,435 jokes that I've been thinking about. 1215 00:57:21,437 --> 00:57:23,302 You know, like, like made up... 1216 00:57:23,304 --> 00:57:24,902 -funny stories. -They aren't funny, Dad. 1217 00:57:24,904 --> 00:57:27,468 You write about so much stuff, like... radio-ologist. 1218 00:57:27,470 --> 00:57:28,871 And surfer. 1219 00:57:31,004 --> 00:57:34,570 -What's a radio-ologist? -And talk about us and Mom. 1220 00:57:35,470 --> 00:57:37,935 I know, I know, but you guys-- you guys are real. 1221 00:57:37,937 --> 00:57:39,368 And me and your mom are real. 1222 00:57:39,370 --> 00:57:42,335 And the radiologist is made up. He's a kind of doctor. 1223 00:57:42,337 --> 00:57:44,368 And the surfer... The surfer's made up. 1224 00:57:44,370 --> 00:57:46,904 Those are just characters, okay? And-- and it's like, I'm... 1225 00:57:49,304 --> 00:57:52,568 It's like I'm making up stories, you know, 1226 00:57:52,570 --> 00:57:55,069 because a lot of stuff is changing. 1227 00:57:55,071 --> 00:57:57,935 Right? And it's-- and it's kind of a way to process it all. 1228 00:57:57,937 --> 00:57:59,535 -Do you know what I mean? -Mm-hmm. 1229 00:57:59,537 --> 00:58:02,837 Oh, no. Come on. Come on, come on. Hey, hey. 1230 00:58:03,937 --> 00:58:05,502 Hey, listen. Hey, hey. 1231 00:58:05,504 --> 00:58:07,202 No, listen, none of it's real. 1232 00:58:07,204 --> 00:58:09,169 That's all made-up stuff, okay? 1233 00:58:09,171 --> 00:58:11,169 Come on. Come on. It's just made up. 1234 00:58:11,171 --> 00:58:14,337 None of it's real life, really. Okay? 1235 00:58:14,871 --> 00:58:16,871 You know how sometimes you use your imagination... 1236 00:58:17,871 --> 00:58:21,104 to make up stories, you know? And games and stuff? 1237 00:58:21,937 --> 00:58:22,771 It's like that. 1238 00:58:24,304 --> 00:58:26,535 It's like the grown-up version of that. 1239 00:58:26,537 --> 00:58:28,071 And I'm-- I'm just-- 1240 00:58:31,304 --> 00:58:33,238 I don't know what I'm doing. 1241 00:58:35,171 --> 00:58:36,402 But you can ask me anything 1242 00:58:36,404 --> 00:58:37,902 and I'll tell you the truth, okay? 1243 00:58:37,904 --> 00:58:40,269 Okay, but it's weird, Dad. 1244 00:58:40,271 --> 00:58:42,370 I know. Life's weird. 1245 00:58:53,238 --> 00:58:55,368 -Hey, Kemp. -Hey. I got a set for you. 1246 00:58:55,370 --> 00:58:56,537 O-Okay. 1247 00:58:56,971 --> 00:58:58,502 It's so weird. 1248 00:58:58,504 --> 00:59:01,104 -Like an open mic thing? -No, no, no, guest spot. 1249 00:59:01,271 --> 00:59:02,568 -Really? -Yep. 1250 00:59:02,570 --> 00:59:04,204 Wow. Okay. 1251 00:59:05,304 --> 00:59:07,568 -When? Is... -Tonight, 8:00. 1252 00:59:07,570 --> 00:59:09,537 -Tonight, as in today, tonight? -Yeah. 1253 00:59:11,038 --> 00:59:12,502 No, I don't know. I don't know if I can-- 1254 00:59:12,504 --> 00:59:14,871 I don't know if I can really step-- step away. 1255 00:59:15,504 --> 00:59:17,368 No, no. Wait. Sorry. Sorry. 1256 00:59:17,370 --> 00:59:18,869 No, no, no. Wait. I'll do it. I'll do it. 1257 00:59:18,871 --> 00:59:19,437 Fuck it. I'll do it. I'll do it. 1258 00:59:21,337 --> 00:59:22,568 -Hey. Hey. -Hey. 1259 00:59:22,570 --> 00:59:24,236 What's going on? Is everything okay? 1260 00:59:24,238 --> 00:59:25,236 Yeah, everything's great. Everything's great. 1261 00:59:25,238 --> 00:59:26,602 Everything's good. 1262 00:59:26,604 --> 00:59:28,136 -Are the boys okay? -Yeah, the boys are great. 1263 00:59:28,138 --> 00:59:29,435 Hey, listen, do you mind 1264 00:59:29,437 --> 00:59:31,069 if I drop them off here for a couple hours? 1265 00:59:31,071 --> 00:59:33,136 -I know it's last minute, but-- -What the fuck? 1266 00:59:33,138 --> 00:59:34,568 No, no, I-- Listen, Tess, please-- 1267 00:59:34,570 --> 00:59:37,136 Listen, don't ambush me like this in front of the boys 1268 00:59:37,138 --> 00:59:39,502 as though they can't come home whenever they want. 1269 00:59:39,504 --> 00:59:42,535 Like I'm trying to keep them from being inside? 1270 00:59:42,537 --> 00:59:44,570 Come on. That sucks. 1271 00:59:45,304 --> 00:59:47,038 -Look-- -You suck. 1272 00:59:48,404 --> 00:59:49,837 You suck! 1273 00:59:50,370 --> 00:59:52,136 -What the fuck? -Hey, where are you going? 1274 00:59:52,138 --> 00:59:53,935 You know, I got it covered. 1275 00:59:53,937 --> 00:59:55,502 -No, where are you going? -No, no, forget it. Forget it. 1276 00:59:55,504 --> 00:59:56,568 -Hey, Lucy! No! -Yeah. Good. 1277 00:59:56,570 --> 00:59:58,036 Let's go, Charlie, let's go! 1278 00:59:58,038 --> 00:59:59,969 -No, Charlie, stay! -No, I got 'em all. 1279 00:59:59,971 --> 01:00:01,102 -What? -I got it covered. 1280 01:00:01,104 --> 01:00:02,302 You don't even have leashes. 1281 01:00:02,304 --> 01:00:04,468 No, it's okay. I got my own leashes. 1282 01:00:04,470 --> 01:00:06,504 I got lots of leashes. 1283 01:00:09,038 --> 01:00:10,302 Okay. 1284 01:00:10,304 --> 01:00:12,271 -Hi, Grandma! -Puppy dogs! 1285 01:00:13,304 --> 01:00:16,269 -Hi, darlin's. -I'm sorry. Sorry about this. 1286 01:00:16,271 --> 01:00:17,568 I know it's last minute. Come on. 1287 01:00:17,570 --> 01:00:20,169 Please. I'm so happy that you thought of us. 1288 01:00:20,171 --> 01:00:22,236 Are you kidding? Who else would we think of? 1289 01:00:22,238 --> 01:00:24,468 -Please do not feed the dogs. -Hi, Grandpa. 1290 01:00:24,470 --> 01:00:25,902 Okay. 1291 01:00:25,904 --> 01:00:28,236 -Hey, Dad. Hi. Hey. -Hey, son. Hi. 1292 01:00:28,238 --> 01:00:29,568 No, no, no. 1293 01:00:29,570 --> 01:00:31,236 -I can't stay for dinner. -What? 1294 01:00:31,238 --> 01:00:33,236 -I gotta go back to the city. -Well, yes, you can. 1295 01:00:33,238 --> 01:00:36,835 It's not good to run around on an empty stomach. 1296 01:00:36,837 --> 01:00:39,335 Read between the lines, Marilyn. He's got a hot date. 1297 01:00:39,337 --> 01:00:41,102 -Dad, don't-- -Hot date? 1298 01:00:41,104 --> 01:00:43,136 -You can stay for a quick bite. -Dad has a hot date? 1299 01:00:43,138 --> 01:00:44,535 No, I can't stay for a quick bite. 1300 01:00:44,537 --> 01:00:46,335 -I gotta get back to the city. -Do you have any Jell-O? 1301 01:00:46,337 --> 01:00:48,568 I told you-- No, no, no. I have to go-- 1302 01:00:48,570 --> 01:00:50,468 If you must know, I gotta get changed 1303 01:00:50,470 --> 01:00:52,036 and I'm going to a comedy club. 1304 01:00:52,038 --> 01:00:53,969 What? Well, you can go later. 1305 01:00:53,971 --> 01:00:55,435 You know, you want to go later, 1306 01:00:55,437 --> 01:00:57,169 because they usually put the guys 1307 01:00:57,171 --> 01:00:58,535 who ain't so funny at the beginning, 1308 01:00:58,537 --> 01:01:00,468 and then... so the pros look better later on. 1309 01:01:00,470 --> 01:01:03,238 No, I can't-- I can't be late because I'm... 1310 01:01:03,837 --> 01:01:05,804 -I'm one of the guys going up. -What? 1311 01:01:06,937 --> 01:01:08,402 I've been doing open mic nights. 1312 01:01:08,404 --> 01:01:10,435 -What's an open mic? -I just-- And, they-- 1313 01:01:10,437 --> 01:01:11,568 I just got a call that one of the comics 1314 01:01:11,570 --> 01:01:13,302 who's emceeing at the club tonight, 1315 01:01:13,304 --> 01:01:15,435 they agreed to give me ten minutes on stage. 1316 01:01:15,437 --> 01:01:16,902 I'm one of the acts. One of the comedy acts. 1317 01:01:16,904 --> 01:01:18,468 -You? -Yeah, me. 1318 01:01:18,470 --> 01:01:22,537 Well-- so, I don't know-- What do you do, you tell jokes? 1319 01:01:23,271 --> 01:01:25,335 I mean, sort of. Well, kind of... 1320 01:01:25,337 --> 01:01:27,136 more like funny stories about my life. 1321 01:01:27,138 --> 01:01:28,568 -Oh, honey. -What's funny about your life? 1322 01:01:28,570 --> 01:01:30,269 I had no idea your life was so bad. 1323 01:01:30,271 --> 01:01:32,069 No, no, no, it's not so bad. 1324 01:01:32,071 --> 01:01:34,269 -This is why she threw you out! -What's funny about your life? 1325 01:01:34,271 --> 01:01:36,502 -She threw you out? -Nobody threw me out, guys. 1326 01:01:36,504 --> 01:01:38,969 No, I love her. Mom, what are you doing? 1327 01:01:38,971 --> 01:01:40,535 Nobody threw me out. Nobody threw me out. 1328 01:01:40,537 --> 01:01:41,603 -I left by mutual consent. -She threw you out? 1329 01:01:41,605 --> 01:01:44,402 No. Everybody knows that. I left by mutual consent. 1330 01:01:44,404 --> 01:01:47,236 And, by the way, I'm not in a bad place. I'm happy. 1331 01:01:47,238 --> 01:01:49,937 And doing this, it makes me feel good. 1332 01:01:50,337 --> 01:01:53,835 -You know? It helps. -How? How does it help 1333 01:01:53,837 --> 01:01:56,502 to have a roomful of people laughing at you? 1334 01:01:56,504 --> 01:01:58,136 -They're not laughing at me. -Son. Son. 1335 01:01:58,138 --> 01:01:59,869 And it's not bad to have them laugh. 1336 01:01:59,871 --> 01:02:02,269 Son, you know what this is? This is a mid-life crisis. 1337 01:02:02,271 --> 01:02:03,835 -That's what it is. -Oh, Dad... 1338 01:02:03,837 --> 01:02:06,368 So, why you... Just go get yourself a motorcycle. 1339 01:02:06,370 --> 01:02:08,002 I don't know. A leather jacket. 1340 01:02:08,004 --> 01:02:09,169 No. Dad, listen. I love you very much. 1341 01:02:09,171 --> 01:02:10,835 -I love you all. Love you guys. -Come on. 1342 01:02:10,837 --> 01:02:12,402 I will see you in the morning. Thank you so much. 1343 01:02:12,404 --> 01:02:14,335 Remember to pick us up on your new motorcycle! 1344 01:02:14,337 --> 01:02:16,036 Nobody's getting a motorcycle. 1345 01:02:16,038 --> 01:02:19,138 No, it is definitely not a date. 1346 01:02:19,537 --> 01:02:23,335 Because he has a wife, and he's had children. 1347 01:02:23,337 --> 01:02:25,204 They've been together for ages. 1348 01:02:25,904 --> 01:02:28,071 Yes, yes. Always just friends. 1349 01:02:28,571 --> 01:02:30,069 He called because he heard that 1350 01:02:30,071 --> 01:02:31,804 I was putting out feelers about coaching. 1351 01:02:49,071 --> 01:02:50,071 Okay. 1352 01:02:56,571 --> 01:02:59,002 -Hey. I'm meeting... -Hi, welcome. 1353 01:02:59,004 --> 01:03:01,004 I see him right there. Thank you. 1354 01:03:05,871 --> 01:03:07,904 Excuse me. Hey. 1355 01:03:08,538 --> 01:03:09,902 How you doing? 1356 01:03:09,904 --> 01:03:11,202 "We're gonna need that hand, Roche!" 1357 01:03:11,204 --> 01:03:14,102 Stop. 1358 01:03:14,104 --> 01:03:16,835 I used to slam the floor so fucking hard 1359 01:03:16,837 --> 01:03:18,603 and pretend it didn't hurt. 1360 01:03:18,605 --> 01:03:20,835 Look, that's what made you a champion. 1361 01:03:20,837 --> 01:03:23,138 Your singular focus, your dedication. 1362 01:03:24,204 --> 01:03:27,002 That's why I heard you wanted to get into coaching, 1363 01:03:27,004 --> 01:03:28,236 I had to reach out. 1364 01:03:28,238 --> 01:03:29,935 It's very flattering. 1365 01:03:29,937 --> 01:03:31,503 I was really excited you reached out. 1366 01:03:31,505 --> 01:03:33,902 Half the US Women's volleyball team 1367 01:03:33,904 --> 01:03:36,202 has come out of our program. 1368 01:03:36,204 --> 01:03:38,302 And the truth is, I've been missing it 1369 01:03:38,304 --> 01:03:40,337 every single day since I retired. 1370 01:03:40,971 --> 01:03:42,503 I just... 1371 01:03:42,505 --> 01:03:45,404 Yeah, I knew coaching would be a great way back in. 1372 01:03:45,837 --> 01:03:47,569 I guess part of me didn't want to accept 1373 01:03:47,571 --> 01:03:49,337 that I wasn't a player anymore. 1374 01:03:49,837 --> 01:03:52,302 You know, so much of my identity was wrapped up in it and... 1375 01:03:52,304 --> 01:03:54,435 I get that. But I'm telling you, 1376 01:03:54,437 --> 01:03:57,102 coaching fills that void for you. 1377 01:03:57,104 --> 01:03:58,935 It forces you to shift gears. 1378 01:03:58,937 --> 01:04:01,402 You stop using the phrase, "Hey, back when I played..." 1379 01:04:01,404 --> 01:04:02,536 Right. 1380 01:04:02,538 --> 01:04:05,337 You learn to make everyone better 1381 01:04:05,904 --> 01:04:08,236 without comparing them to yourself. 1382 01:04:08,238 --> 01:04:10,236 Right. Amazing. 1383 01:04:10,238 --> 01:04:12,102 Is-- Is it frustrating? 1384 01:04:12,104 --> 01:04:15,102 -Yes! Absolutely frustrating. -Oh. Okay. 1385 01:04:15,104 --> 01:04:16,302 That's just a given. 1386 01:04:16,304 --> 01:04:18,102 I think it'll always be that way. 1387 01:04:18,104 --> 01:04:21,269 But for me, I can't tell you how gratifying it is 1388 01:04:21,271 --> 01:04:25,471 to be part of a sport as it evolves, despite not playing. 1389 01:04:26,138 --> 01:04:28,002 -Wow. -That's what does it for me. 1390 01:04:28,004 --> 01:04:30,902 The best part, my three daughters, they love it. 1391 01:04:30,904 --> 01:04:33,169 They actually think their dad is cool. 1392 01:04:33,171 --> 01:04:36,102 Hey, how's Tracy? What a beast she was. 1393 01:04:36,104 --> 01:04:37,269 She's good. 1394 01:04:37,271 --> 01:04:39,603 She's, uh, in Salt Lake, doing her thing. 1395 01:04:39,605 --> 01:04:41,368 Oh, yeah. Is she skiing or...? 1396 01:04:41,370 --> 01:04:42,304 Polygamy. 1397 01:04:45,071 --> 01:04:46,835 Oh! 1398 01:04:46,837 --> 01:04:48,536 Yeah, look. It threw us for a loop. Don't get me wrong. 1399 01:04:48,538 --> 01:04:51,104 But... it's all worked out. 1400 01:04:51,304 --> 01:04:54,304 -I-I didn't know you'd split. -Seven years now. 1401 01:04:55,004 --> 01:04:56,902 I have to admit, being single 1402 01:04:56,904 --> 01:04:58,804 in your mid-to-late-forties is, uh... 1403 01:04:59,538 --> 01:05:01,505 What's the word here? Interesting? 1404 01:05:02,571 --> 01:05:04,335 -Okay? -Is that the word? 1405 01:05:04,337 --> 01:05:05,304 But... 1406 01:05:07,004 --> 01:05:09,202 I'd be lost without coaching. 1407 01:05:09,204 --> 01:05:10,505 It-- It saved me. 1408 01:05:11,871 --> 01:05:13,536 So... All right. Enough about me. 1409 01:05:13,538 --> 01:05:15,169 Alex. How's he doing? 1410 01:05:15,171 --> 01:05:17,069 -Two boys, right? -Two boys. 1411 01:05:17,071 --> 01:05:19,004 -How are they? -They are great. 1412 01:05:19,370 --> 01:05:21,835 Well, adjusting, 'cause, uh, 1413 01:05:21,837 --> 01:05:23,469 Alex and I decided to take a little break. 1414 01:05:23,471 --> 01:05:24,971 Oh, no. 1415 01:05:25,605 --> 01:05:27,337 I'm sorry. I hadn't heard that. 1416 01:05:27,605 --> 01:05:29,337 Yeah. No, it's... 1417 01:05:30,370 --> 01:05:32,304 Wait, it's not a break. 1418 01:05:33,238 --> 01:05:35,171 We split. He moved out. 1419 01:05:36,571 --> 01:05:38,469 -Wow. -Uh, it's over. Yeah. 1420 01:05:38,471 --> 01:05:40,071 Wow. Okay. 1421 01:05:40,538 --> 01:05:41,804 Yeah, it's actually good. 1422 01:05:43,038 --> 01:05:45,102 I gotta admit, I'm shocked. 1423 01:05:45,104 --> 01:05:47,304 You two just seemed like a perfect fit to me. 1424 01:05:48,605 --> 01:05:51,971 Yeah. Me too, but, um... 1425 01:05:55,371 --> 01:05:56,571 I guess we just... 1426 01:05:59,104 --> 01:06:01,069 ...slowly grew away from each other. 1427 01:06:01,071 --> 01:06:02,204 If that makes any sense. 1428 01:06:02,904 --> 01:06:03,871 I get that. 1429 01:06:05,004 --> 01:06:06,204 Jeez, Tess, I'm... 1430 01:06:07,538 --> 01:06:09,071 I'm glad I reached out. 1431 01:06:14,571 --> 01:06:15,835 Yeah. 1432 01:06:15,837 --> 01:06:18,238 Are you tired? 'Cause I'm not. 1433 01:06:18,937 --> 01:06:20,503 I'm not tired. Absolutely not. 1434 01:06:20,505 --> 01:06:21,869 My buddy says there's a great place 1435 01:06:21,871 --> 01:06:23,269 right around the corner, actually. 1436 01:06:23,271 --> 01:06:26,603 Oh. Amazing. I'm gonna just... 1437 01:06:26,605 --> 01:06:27,971 -Yeah. Okay. -...use the restroom and... 1438 01:06:28,505 --> 01:06:29,438 Be right back. 1439 01:06:45,038 --> 01:06:45,871 Yeah. 1440 01:06:46,605 --> 01:06:48,305 Fuck it. 1441 01:06:50,471 --> 01:06:51,971 -All right. Following you. -Okay. 1442 01:06:53,471 --> 01:06:55,036 Sounds fun. 1443 01:06:55,038 --> 01:06:56,969 No, I'm not gonna do it, but... 1444 01:06:56,971 --> 01:06:58,238 Absolutely not. 1445 01:07:03,305 --> 01:07:04,869 -They letting you go up tonight? -Yeah. 1446 01:07:04,871 --> 01:07:06,171 We'll see. I'm a little bit late. 1447 01:07:07,338 --> 01:07:08,869 -Fuck. Cutting it close. -Sorry. 1448 01:07:08,871 --> 01:07:10,605 I got held up. I'm sorry. 1449 01:07:12,305 --> 01:07:13,503 I was starting to think you were bailing on me. 1450 01:07:13,505 --> 01:07:15,069 What? No, no, no. No. 1451 01:07:15,071 --> 01:07:16,270 -Whatever, I just-- -You want a drink? 1452 01:07:16,272 --> 01:07:17,503 -No, no, no. I'm good. -Okay. 1453 01:07:17,505 --> 01:07:19,338 Oh, my God, I need a beer. 1454 01:07:21,471 --> 01:07:22,969 Big night. 1455 01:07:22,971 --> 01:07:24,469 -Big night tonight. -Oh, my God. 1456 01:07:24,471 --> 01:07:26,603 -You're gonna kill it. -I know, I know. 1457 01:07:26,605 --> 01:07:28,438 Then we'll see. I'll meet you up here. 1458 01:07:29,204 --> 01:07:30,605 I'll meet you back here when we're done. 1459 01:07:37,505 --> 01:07:40,837 ♪ I needed to know where The river came out, come on ♪ 1460 01:07:41,238 --> 01:07:43,236 Uh, Sam Jay has the light. You have two minutes. 1461 01:07:43,238 --> 01:07:44,305 Okay. 1462 01:07:45,871 --> 01:07:47,171 You're gonna be great. 1463 01:08:02,405 --> 01:08:05,071 We can't just fuck and make a kid. We can't do that. 1464 01:08:05,338 --> 01:08:06,869 So it's like, how we gonna do it? 1465 01:08:06,871 --> 01:08:08,837 Someone's gotta go buy nut and I'm not buying nut. 1466 01:08:10,204 --> 01:08:11,436 I'm not. I'm not goin' to the nut store, 1467 01:08:11,438 --> 01:08:12,603 ask nobody for no nut. 1468 01:08:12,605 --> 01:08:14,169 And she got upset when I told her that. 1469 01:08:14,171 --> 01:08:15,969 She's, like, "You're an asshole. 1470 01:08:15,971 --> 01:08:18,237 We don't just have to buy a nut. We can just adopt." 1471 01:08:18,239 --> 01:08:19,835 I'm like, "All right." Now we're going to the baby store 1472 01:08:19,837 --> 01:08:22,069 and buying a whole one, so... 1473 01:08:22,071 --> 01:08:24,138 Hey, my name's been Sam Jay. Thank you so much. 1474 01:08:27,538 --> 01:08:29,371 Yeah! 1475 01:08:30,871 --> 01:08:32,270 You guys, give it up for Sam Jay! 1476 01:08:32,272 --> 01:08:33,937 I hope there's somebody else. 1477 01:08:34,305 --> 01:08:36,371 -She was great. -She was great. 1478 01:08:37,538 --> 01:08:39,069 -This is so fun. -It's cool, right? 1479 01:08:39,071 --> 01:08:40,436 Love it. 1480 01:08:40,438 --> 01:08:40,969 Next comedian coming to the stage... 1481 01:08:40,971 --> 01:08:42,303 I'm glad we're here. 1482 01:08:42,305 --> 01:08:43,835 ...first time on this show. 1483 01:08:43,837 --> 01:08:45,969 Yeah, so I need you guys to give him a lot of energy. 1484 01:08:45,971 --> 01:08:47,503 Start clapping, make a lot of noise... 1485 01:08:47,505 --> 01:08:48,935 All right. Somebody else coming. 1486 01:08:48,937 --> 01:08:51,405 ...and give it up for Alex Novak! 1487 01:08:55,004 --> 01:08:56,239 How you doing? 1488 01:08:58,371 --> 01:09:01,170 Oh! How you guys doing tonight? 1489 01:09:01,172 --> 01:09:03,203 Yeah! Give it up for our host. 1490 01:09:03,205 --> 01:09:04,804 -Wait. -He's doing great, huh? 1491 01:09:05,138 --> 01:09:07,170 What the fuck is happening? 1492 01:09:07,172 --> 01:09:08,436 Give it up for me. I'm doing great! 1493 01:09:08,438 --> 01:09:10,369 I can promise you, I did not know... 1494 01:09:10,371 --> 01:09:11,569 I don't-- 1495 01:09:11,571 --> 01:09:12,403 My personal life's in the shitter... 1496 01:09:12,405 --> 01:09:13,971 -Does he do--? -No! 1497 01:09:14,305 --> 01:09:16,569 Yeah, I mean, I'm paying rent on a shitty apartment 1498 01:09:16,571 --> 01:09:19,469 and mortgage on a house I don't live in anymore. 1499 01:09:19,471 --> 01:09:21,969 You know? It's fine. And one of my teeth hurts. 1500 01:09:21,971 --> 01:09:24,336 And I don't even know where my dentist is. 1501 01:09:24,338 --> 01:09:26,303 My ex used to handle all that. 1502 01:09:26,305 --> 01:09:28,904 But other than that, you know... Hey... 1503 01:09:29,837 --> 01:09:31,835 I had sex with a woman. 1504 01:09:31,837 --> 01:09:34,139 Yeah, so like I said, I'm doing great. 1505 01:09:36,004 --> 01:09:37,239 Yeah. 1506 01:09:38,971 --> 01:09:42,038 I never thought I'd get applause for having sex with a woman. 1507 01:09:42,505 --> 01:09:45,102 Like, "You finally did it!" 1508 01:09:45,104 --> 01:09:46,338 Yeah! 1509 01:09:47,505 --> 01:09:51,172 Uh, yeah. No, I had sex with a... with a woman, um... 1510 01:09:51,904 --> 01:09:54,336 after, you know, being married for a number of years. 1511 01:09:54,338 --> 01:09:56,272 And... and it was... 1512 01:09:57,272 --> 01:09:58,569 ...scary. 1513 01:09:58,571 --> 01:10:00,036 Yeah. 1514 01:10:00,038 --> 01:10:02,471 But at least I was not very good at it. 1515 01:10:04,505 --> 01:10:08,403 I think that after-- I think after 20 years of marriage, 1516 01:10:08,405 --> 01:10:12,036 you know, you just get used to doing things a certain way. 1517 01:10:12,038 --> 01:10:14,036 You know what I mean? Like, sex with your wi-- 1518 01:10:14,038 --> 01:10:15,969 It's-- It's fine. It was great with my-- 1519 01:10:15,971 --> 01:10:18,403 It's like, you know when you go to an Airbnb, 1520 01:10:18,405 --> 01:10:22,036 and you go into the kitchen, and it kind of looks the same, like, 1521 01:10:22,038 --> 01:10:24,069 but it's just a little bit different? 1522 01:10:24,071 --> 01:10:26,935 Like, certain spoons are in different drawers? 1523 01:10:26,937 --> 01:10:28,403 So you're kind of looking around, 1524 01:10:28,405 --> 01:10:30,137 you're opening stuff up, and you're like-- 1525 01:10:30,139 --> 01:10:32,105 And I was doing that on a human body. 1526 01:10:33,505 --> 01:10:36,403 I don't know, I feel like sex now has really changed 1527 01:10:36,405 --> 01:10:40,536 since back when I was out there in the game 20-- 1528 01:10:40,538 --> 01:10:42,569 I never cheated on my wife, so this is the first-- 1529 01:10:42,571 --> 01:10:44,303 And it feels like now... 1530 01:10:44,305 --> 01:10:45,403 Are you sure you don't want to leave? 1531 01:10:45,405 --> 01:10:46,403 ...there are so many noises 1532 01:10:46,405 --> 01:10:48,002 -that she was making. -No. 1533 01:10:48,004 --> 01:10:49,002 -...so animalistic. -I don't want to go anywhere. 1534 01:10:49,004 --> 01:10:51,036 And it just felt like two apes fucking. 1535 01:10:51,038 --> 01:10:53,170 Obviously, apes do not make love, right? 1536 01:10:53,172 --> 01:10:55,303 Nobody imagines that apes are like this, 1537 01:10:55,305 --> 01:10:57,103 staring in each other's eyes, saying, 1538 01:10:57,105 --> 01:11:00,237 "I love you. And let's come at the same time." 1539 01:11:00,239 --> 01:11:02,137 Apes don't do that shit. 1540 01:11:02,139 --> 01:11:05,303 Apes are doing it, fucking, you know, dog-style. 1541 01:11:05,305 --> 01:11:07,902 Or ape-style. Whatever the fuck it is. 1542 01:11:07,904 --> 01:11:10,436 I don't know. 1543 01:11:10,438 --> 01:11:12,303 I gotta tell you, the whole experience, 1544 01:11:12,305 --> 01:11:14,203 to be honest, made me miss my wife. 1545 01:11:14,205 --> 01:11:15,971 It really did. Yeah. 1546 01:11:16,371 --> 01:11:20,072 Which was, um, surprising because... 1547 01:11:20,971 --> 01:11:22,237 we had a lot of fights. 1548 01:11:22,239 --> 01:11:24,804 Listen... And, um... 1549 01:11:25,272 --> 01:11:28,272 And I actually kind of ended up missing some of our fights, too. 1550 01:11:29,072 --> 01:11:31,371 Yeah, they were... Our fights were... 1551 01:11:31,571 --> 01:11:32,837 Uh... 1552 01:11:33,305 --> 01:11:35,336 ...psychological? 1553 01:11:35,338 --> 01:11:37,039 Do you know what I mean? Do you know what I mean by that? 1554 01:11:38,338 --> 01:11:41,037 All the dudes know what I mean. 1555 01:11:41,039 --> 01:11:42,869 They're like, "Yeah. Every interaction 1556 01:11:42,871 --> 01:11:45,272 is a fucking psychological minefield." 1557 01:11:46,105 --> 01:11:47,969 You know when your wife or your partner 1558 01:11:47,971 --> 01:11:49,835 gets really, really quiet, 1559 01:11:49,837 --> 01:11:52,338 and now you gotta guess what's wrong? 1560 01:11:52,605 --> 01:11:56,569 So, you have to ask a blanket, like, question. 1561 01:11:56,571 --> 01:11:58,203 Keep it really gener-- 1562 01:11:58,205 --> 01:12:01,403 I remember one time, my ex-wife and I were driving, 1563 01:12:01,405 --> 01:12:02,937 coming home from a friend's place. 1564 01:12:03,904 --> 01:12:06,305 And she is so quiet. 1565 01:12:07,305 --> 01:12:09,137 She's so quiet, like... 1566 01:12:09,139 --> 01:12:10,871 Do you remember Jacob's Ladder? 1567 01:12:11,972 --> 01:12:13,603 It was like that. Right? 1568 01:12:13,605 --> 01:12:16,203 I'm sort of dating myself a little bit, but it was... 1569 01:12:16,205 --> 01:12:19,270 It was like I was questioning my own existence on the planet, 1570 01:12:19,272 --> 01:12:20,403 it was so quiet. 1571 01:12:20,405 --> 01:12:22,869 Just the two of us, in the car, 1572 01:12:22,871 --> 01:12:26,438 and I'm so scared of what she's gonna say. 1573 01:12:27,139 --> 01:12:29,103 So I just go... 1574 01:12:29,105 --> 01:12:30,405 I muster up the courage. 1575 01:12:32,571 --> 01:12:34,139 "Honey, are you mad at me?" 1576 01:12:36,471 --> 01:12:38,103 And she looks at me and she goes, 1577 01:12:38,105 --> 01:12:42,369 "You know, sometimes I just wish that you'd talk to me 1578 01:12:42,371 --> 01:12:44,471 the same way that you talk to your friends." 1579 01:12:46,205 --> 01:12:47,505 And I go, "Okay." 1580 01:12:51,039 --> 01:12:53,039 "Dude, my wife is driving me crazy." 1581 01:12:56,139 --> 01:12:57,603 Awesome. You guys have been so great. 1582 01:12:57,605 --> 01:12:59,936 Thanks so much. I've been Alex Novak. 1583 01:12:59,938 --> 01:13:01,303 All right, guys, thanks so much. Good night. 1584 01:13:01,305 --> 01:13:02,538 Let's go. 1585 01:13:06,272 --> 01:13:09,103 You guys, give it up for Alex Novak! 1586 01:13:09,105 --> 01:13:11,503 Oh, my God! Alex, that was fantastic! 1587 01:13:11,505 --> 01:13:13,303 Yes! You were so good! 1588 01:13:13,305 --> 01:13:14,569 Hey, can I get some water, please? 1589 01:13:14,571 --> 01:13:16,203 Absolutely, man. Yeah. 1590 01:13:16,205 --> 01:13:18,037 -Yeah. -This is Laird. Sorry. 1591 01:13:18,039 --> 01:13:19,835 I'm Nina. Nice to meet you. Good to see you. 1592 01:13:19,837 --> 01:13:21,237 Good to-- Yeah, we're gonna... 1593 01:13:21,239 --> 01:13:23,105 Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I get it. 1594 01:13:23,438 --> 01:13:25,037 -It's a lot. -All right. 1595 01:13:25,039 --> 01:13:26,203 You guys ready for this next comedian? Say, "Hell yeah." 1596 01:13:26,205 --> 01:13:28,137 Hell yeah! 1597 01:13:28,139 --> 01:13:29,503 Start clapping right now. 1598 01:13:29,505 --> 01:13:34,505 Give it up right now for the legend, Mr. Dave Attell! 1599 01:13:37,405 --> 01:13:39,369 Wow! What a night! 1600 01:13:39,371 --> 01:13:41,469 -Hey! How was it? -It was so good. 1601 01:13:41,471 --> 01:13:43,103 -Was it good? -I'm so proud of you. 1602 01:13:43,105 --> 01:13:44,869 -I just opened for Dave Attell! -You ballsy motherfucker. 1603 01:13:44,871 --> 01:13:46,903 Yeah, you just did that set in front of your wife. 1604 01:13:46,905 --> 01:13:48,436 -I respect that. -What are you mean? 1605 01:13:48,438 --> 01:13:49,936 Tess is here with Laird. The tall-- 1606 01:13:49,938 --> 01:13:51,336 What do you mean, Tess? Tess is here now? 1607 01:13:51,338 --> 01:13:52,469 What are you talking about? Where? 1608 01:13:52,471 --> 01:13:53,037 Yeah, just saw them. They went outside. 1609 01:13:53,039 --> 01:13:54,336 Did you not invite them? 1610 01:13:54,338 --> 01:13:55,137 No, I didn't fucking invite them! 1611 01:13:55,139 --> 01:13:56,438 Jesus Christ. 1612 01:13:59,837 --> 01:14:02,336 -Holy shit. Okay. -'Cause I said so. 1613 01:14:02,338 --> 01:14:05,037 -Take it easy there, bruh. -Whoa! 1614 01:14:05,039 --> 01:14:06,938 -What? -You found a sitter? 1615 01:14:07,139 --> 01:14:09,137 No, I got them working at the falafel place right here. 1616 01:14:09,139 --> 01:14:10,336 They're at your folks' place? 1617 01:14:10,338 --> 01:14:11,205 Yeah. 1618 01:14:12,471 --> 01:14:14,835 -What the fuck are you--? -What the fuck? 1619 01:14:14,837 --> 01:14:16,303 What the fuck, me? What the fuck are--? 1620 01:14:16,305 --> 01:14:17,970 You've been moving on, huh? 1621 01:14:17,972 --> 01:14:20,270 Me, moving on? You show up with fucking Laird? 1622 01:14:20,272 --> 01:14:21,569 Who I just said goodbye to. 1623 01:14:21,571 --> 01:14:22,536 Okay, but Laird, of all fucking people. 1624 01:14:22,538 --> 01:14:23,569 What the fuck do you care? 1625 01:14:23,571 --> 01:14:24,369 How long have you been fucking him? 1626 01:14:24,371 --> 01:14:25,336 For years. 1627 01:14:25,338 --> 01:14:26,438 -No. -No. 1628 01:14:26,838 --> 01:14:28,338 Oh, fuck. 1629 01:14:29,005 --> 01:14:30,569 How long you been doing... 1630 01:14:30,571 --> 01:14:32,170 -stand-up comedy? -No, I only did that one time. 1631 01:14:32,172 --> 01:14:34,005 -Jesus Christ. -Oh. 1632 01:14:34,338 --> 01:14:35,804 Mmm. 1633 01:14:38,838 --> 01:14:39,838 Sorry, I thought you... 1634 01:14:41,205 --> 01:14:42,905 Yeah, stand-up I've been doing for a while. 1635 01:14:45,371 --> 01:14:47,137 So I'm the only one who doesn't know you do this? 1636 01:14:47,139 --> 01:14:48,571 Actually, tonight was kind of a big night. 1637 01:14:50,239 --> 01:14:53,072 I mean, it's obviously bigger now that... 1638 01:14:54,872 --> 01:14:56,569 I usually only do open mic nights, 1639 01:14:56,571 --> 01:14:57,972 and they're, like, half the crowd, and... 1640 01:14:59,205 --> 01:15:00,369 I don't know why I never told you. 1641 01:15:00,371 --> 01:15:01,970 I haven't even really told myself 1642 01:15:01,972 --> 01:15:03,139 that it's becoming a thing, you know? 1643 01:15:05,972 --> 01:15:07,105 It's hot. 1644 01:15:08,505 --> 01:15:09,405 Really? 1645 01:15:11,938 --> 01:15:13,172 Give me a drag. 1646 01:15:26,371 --> 01:15:27,972 Mmm. 1647 01:15:31,272 --> 01:15:33,037 Hey, will you pass me my smokes? 1648 01:15:33,039 --> 01:15:33,938 I think they're on the table there. 1649 01:15:35,505 --> 01:15:37,436 If you hit the light. The button's right on the... 1650 01:15:37,438 --> 01:15:38,838 You got it. 1651 01:15:39,371 --> 01:15:40,870 I think the lighter's there too, right? 1652 01:15:40,872 --> 01:15:41,805 Yeah. 1653 01:15:41,972 --> 01:15:42,872 Thanks. 1654 01:15:50,338 --> 01:15:52,039 What's with all the smoking? 1655 01:15:53,371 --> 01:15:55,436 I feel like we're in our twenties again. 1656 01:15:55,438 --> 01:15:57,338 Mmm. 1657 01:15:58,905 --> 01:16:00,039 Mmm. 1658 01:16:04,072 --> 01:16:05,970 I'm just, you know... 1659 01:16:05,972 --> 01:16:08,203 allowing myself the grace to... 1660 01:16:08,205 --> 01:16:10,471 -Marilyn? -Yeah. 1661 01:16:13,039 --> 01:16:15,072 Let's talk about Marilyn. 1662 01:16:16,239 --> 01:16:17,805 Sorry. 1663 01:16:21,072 --> 01:16:25,039 What the absolute fuck? 1664 01:16:26,139 --> 01:16:28,003 Oh, my God. 1665 01:16:28,005 --> 01:16:30,305 Look, I think we're just gracing the shit out of each other. 1666 01:16:30,872 --> 01:16:32,571 Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry... 1667 01:16:33,338 --> 01:16:34,903 Sorry. 1668 01:16:34,905 --> 01:16:37,272 I promise I won't bring my mom up again. 1669 01:16:39,005 --> 01:16:41,371 No, it's hot. No. 1670 01:16:45,039 --> 01:16:45,972 Oh. 1671 01:16:47,072 --> 01:16:48,239 Hey. 1672 01:16:52,105 --> 01:16:53,970 What about the boys? 1673 01:16:53,972 --> 01:16:55,538 Like, we can't tell anybody. 1674 01:16:57,338 --> 01:16:59,172 -No. No, of course. -Right? 1675 01:16:59,538 --> 01:17:01,172 We can't confuse them. 1676 01:17:02,105 --> 01:17:05,139 'Cause, I mean, yeah. This is confusing. 1677 01:17:06,172 --> 01:17:07,436 Yeah. No. 1678 01:17:07,438 --> 01:17:09,438 Of course. Yeah, it is. It is confusing. 1679 01:17:12,538 --> 01:17:13,938 I'm sleeping over. 1680 01:17:15,139 --> 01:17:16,872 -Okay. Yeah. -Yeah. 1681 01:17:17,338 --> 01:17:19,469 Uh, there's, like, boxers and T-shirts 1682 01:17:19,471 --> 01:17:20,936 in that top drawer there. 1683 01:17:20,938 --> 01:17:22,105 -Here? -Yeah. 1684 01:17:23,105 --> 01:17:24,872 I feel shaky. 1685 01:17:26,405 --> 01:17:27,405 Fuck. 1686 01:17:37,905 --> 01:17:40,005 I can't believe you fucked somebody! 1687 01:17:50,305 --> 01:17:52,471 Oh, my God. 1688 01:17:54,938 --> 01:17:58,237 Did you fuck her right here? In front of our armoire? 1689 01:17:58,239 --> 01:18:01,371 Come on. I never would have done it in front of our armoire. 1690 01:18:02,205 --> 01:18:04,403 Do-- Do you know how sick and twisted that'd be 1691 01:18:04,405 --> 01:18:06,338 if I did it in front of the armoire? 1692 01:18:13,938 --> 01:18:15,536 That was fucking insane. 1693 01:18:15,538 --> 01:18:17,172 That was fucking insane. 1694 01:18:18,305 --> 01:18:19,305 Mmm. 1695 01:18:21,838 --> 01:18:23,205 You kept looking at me. 1696 01:18:25,471 --> 01:18:26,905 I always do. 1697 01:18:28,471 --> 01:18:30,538 Have you upped your parenting since we split? 1698 01:18:31,405 --> 01:18:33,139 Out of necessity. 1699 01:18:33,438 --> 01:18:35,538 Well, yeah, that. But, I mean, like... 1700 01:18:36,905 --> 01:18:38,205 Do you find that you'll, like... 1701 01:18:39,838 --> 01:18:41,172 Do you find that you'll, like... 1702 01:18:42,872 --> 01:18:44,172 I don't know. You'll-- You'll... 1703 01:18:44,872 --> 01:18:47,436 get off your phone if the boys are around, 1704 01:18:47,438 --> 01:18:52,072 thinking that maybe they'll see you on it less than me? 1705 01:18:53,172 --> 01:18:55,003 Just, like, you know-- 1706 01:18:55,005 --> 01:18:57,170 being more attentive to be better than me? 1707 01:18:57,172 --> 01:19:00,838 To, like... to beat me at parenting? 1708 01:19:01,272 --> 01:19:02,972 Yeah. But I always do that. 1709 01:19:04,272 --> 01:19:06,170 Yeah, but, I mean, isn't that ridiculous? 1710 01:19:06,172 --> 01:19:07,272 Yeah. 1711 01:19:07,505 --> 01:19:09,005 But I always want to win. 1712 01:19:10,205 --> 01:19:12,972 Yeah, of course. 1713 01:19:19,938 --> 01:19:20,838 Fuck. 1714 01:19:23,505 --> 01:19:25,005 Yeah. I knew you'd say that. 1715 01:19:26,239 --> 01:19:28,471 Unbelievable. The passive aggressive. 1716 01:19:29,505 --> 01:19:32,237 My mom said that she didn't want to, uh, 1717 01:19:32,239 --> 01:19:35,005 meddle in-in my marriage. 1718 01:19:36,438 --> 01:19:38,371 Which is exactly what meddlers say... 1719 01:19:39,539 --> 01:19:41,239 before they meddle in your marriage. 1720 01:19:42,505 --> 01:19:45,072 Uh... My kids, um... 1721 01:19:46,272 --> 01:19:48,170 My kids though, I know... 1722 01:19:48,172 --> 01:19:51,170 They'd probably be happy to know that we're together. You know? 1723 01:19:51,172 --> 01:19:52,903 I mean, I think this would make them... 1724 01:19:52,905 --> 01:19:55,003 But we cannot tell 'em. 1725 01:19:55,005 --> 01:19:59,239 Because what if the wheels come off this particular bus? 1726 01:20:01,072 --> 01:20:02,371 That's what I'm worried about. 1727 01:20:03,371 --> 01:20:08,272 But until then, I'm just enjoying this wild ride... 1728 01:20:09,471 --> 01:20:10,272 of... 1729 01:20:13,139 --> 01:20:16,471 ...having an affair with my ex-wife. 1730 01:20:18,405 --> 01:20:20,037 Hey, man, just came down on my break. 1731 01:20:20,039 --> 01:20:22,239 I wanted to watch your act. It's good. Getting better. 1732 01:20:22,471 --> 01:20:24,436 -Come on. One more time! -Thanks, man. 1733 01:20:24,438 --> 01:20:25,369 Excuse me. 1734 01:20:25,371 --> 01:20:27,403 Well, well, well. 1735 01:20:27,405 --> 01:20:30,239 I heard you crushed the other night with some new material. 1736 01:20:31,972 --> 01:20:33,070 You smoked my weed and you owe me money. 1737 01:20:33,072 --> 01:20:35,270 Just gonna go out on a limb and say I think-- 1738 01:20:35,272 --> 01:20:36,903 Novak, let me get it straight. 1739 01:20:36,905 --> 01:20:40,103 So, your main is your side and your side is the main. 1740 01:20:40,105 --> 01:20:41,137 The new main. 1741 01:20:41,139 --> 01:20:42,170 -The new main. -Yeah. 1742 01:20:42,172 --> 01:20:43,369 That's like going to Popeyes 1743 01:20:43,371 --> 01:20:44,504 and gettin' chicken and chicken on the side. 1744 01:20:44,506 --> 01:20:46,938 "Let me get wings with a side of wings." 1745 01:20:47,172 --> 01:20:49,436 My grandma used to say gettin' back with a ex 1746 01:20:49,438 --> 01:20:51,472 is like taking a shit and trying to put it back in your asshole. 1747 01:20:52,938 --> 01:20:54,537 -Fuck you guys. -Just let go! 1748 01:20:54,539 --> 01:20:55,836 Fuck you too, Novak! 1749 01:20:55,838 --> 01:20:57,272 Hey, love you, young Novak. 1750 01:20:58,972 --> 01:21:01,037 Yeah. Here we go! Ready? Cover, cover! 1751 01:21:01,039 --> 01:21:03,037 Wait, you aced five. 1752 01:21:03,039 --> 01:21:05,103 I mean, she could not pass the float serve. 1753 01:21:05,105 --> 01:21:06,504 And our hitter was on fire, too. 1754 01:21:06,506 --> 01:21:08,239 Well, you had that great last swing. 1755 01:21:16,506 --> 01:21:17,905 You're nuts! 1756 01:21:21,072 --> 01:21:22,572 -What are you doing? -What? 1757 01:21:25,039 --> 01:21:27,870 You drove all this way from the city just to drive me home? 1758 01:21:27,872 --> 01:21:29,572 It's a 47-minute drive. It's not a big deal. 1759 01:21:33,205 --> 01:21:34,305 This is scary. 1760 01:21:35,205 --> 01:21:36,872 But fuck, it's fun. 1761 01:21:38,506 --> 01:21:39,439 Yeah. 1762 01:21:43,472 --> 01:21:44,604 -Is that Mom? -Is that Mom? 1763 01:21:44,606 --> 01:21:46,537 -Yeah. -Whoa! That's cool. 1764 01:21:46,539 --> 01:21:47,537 What do you think? 1765 01:21:47,539 --> 01:21:48,570 Pretty cool. 1766 01:21:48,572 --> 01:21:49,506 That's really cool, yeah. 1767 01:21:53,239 --> 01:21:54,437 Is that when she was in the Olympics? 1768 01:21:54,439 --> 01:21:57,039 Yeah. What do you think? It's pretty awesome right? 1769 01:21:57,406 --> 01:21:58,239 -Yeah. -Hi, Mom. 1770 01:22:18,239 --> 01:22:19,572 Oh, shit. 1771 01:22:21,072 --> 01:22:22,239 Shit. 1772 01:22:24,406 --> 01:22:26,537 Just like every year. There he is. 1773 01:22:26,539 --> 01:22:29,570 Oh! 1774 01:22:29,572 --> 01:22:31,870 I thought you guys didn't make it. 1775 01:22:31,872 --> 01:22:33,404 I was looking at all the-- 1776 01:22:33,406 --> 01:22:35,437 -Hey, buddy. -Hey, hey, hey! 1777 01:22:35,439 --> 01:22:39,103 Somebody actually fell asleep on my shoulder while I was there. 1778 01:22:39,105 --> 01:22:40,570 -Hey. -Hey. Can I give you a hand? 1779 01:22:40,572 --> 01:22:42,070 No, man, I got these. They're light. 1780 01:22:42,072 --> 01:22:43,404 How are you? 1781 01:22:43,406 --> 01:22:44,838 -I'm good. How are you doing? -Great. 1782 01:22:46,506 --> 01:22:48,903 -You like my 'stache? -Yeah. What's with the look? 1783 01:22:48,905 --> 01:22:50,504 The look? I've got a... 1784 01:22:50,506 --> 01:22:53,437 I got a fourth callback of a ranch hand 1785 01:22:53,439 --> 01:22:55,103 in a western TV series. 1786 01:22:55,105 --> 01:22:56,370 -What? No! -Good. 1787 01:22:56,372 --> 01:22:57,604 -Yeah. -It's a strong 'stache. 1788 01:22:57,606 --> 01:22:59,604 -Yeah, yeah. I'm just grateful. -Nice. 1789 01:22:59,606 --> 01:23:01,003 -Here. -Thanks, man. 1790 01:23:01,005 --> 01:23:02,005 Shotgun! 1791 01:23:04,305 --> 01:23:05,836 Yeah, I know where it is. 1792 01:23:05,838 --> 01:23:08,003 -Yeah. Yeah. -Jesus. Wow. 1793 01:23:08,005 --> 01:23:09,404 I'm just excited. What do you want me to say? 1794 01:23:09,406 --> 01:23:10,270 -Yeah, all right. -Wow, thrilling. 1795 01:23:10,272 --> 01:23:12,205 What do you know? 1796 01:23:12,938 --> 01:23:13,872 Jesus. 1797 01:23:17,439 --> 01:23:18,272 Where's she at? 1798 01:23:19,606 --> 01:23:21,370 Hey! Welcome to Oyster Bay! 1799 01:23:21,372 --> 01:23:23,139 -Hey! -Whoo! 1800 01:23:24,539 --> 01:23:25,936 My God. 1801 01:23:25,938 --> 01:23:27,003 I can't believe it's been a year already. 1802 01:23:27,005 --> 01:23:28,237 -I know. -Did that Hopkins thing. 1803 01:23:28,239 --> 01:23:29,936 -You've been working hard. -Learn it 250 times. 1804 01:23:29,938 --> 01:23:31,437 You're in the attic, of course. 1805 01:23:31,439 --> 01:23:32,936 -Great. -I'm so happy to be back here. 1806 01:23:32,938 --> 01:23:34,903 Geoffrey, Stephen, you guys are in the primary. 1807 01:23:34,905 --> 01:23:36,437 Game night tonight still? 1808 01:23:36,439 --> 01:23:37,903 -Are we still doing that? -Yeah. 1809 01:23:37,905 --> 01:23:39,370 -For sure. -What are we playing? 1810 01:23:39,372 --> 01:23:41,003 Alex, you want something to drink? 1811 01:23:41,005 --> 01:23:42,472 -Yeah, yeah, yeah. -Same thing we play every year. 1812 01:23:43,105 --> 01:23:45,037 -Why don't we play... -Same thing we... 1813 01:23:45,039 --> 01:23:46,203 Why don't we do Bananagrams? 1814 01:23:46,205 --> 01:23:47,370 -I got all the-- -What? 1815 01:23:47,372 --> 01:23:48,404 -What did you say? -Are you unhappy wi-- 1816 01:23:48,406 --> 01:23:50,239 Whoa, whoa, whoa. We know what game we're playing. 1817 01:23:52,005 --> 01:23:53,237 I'm just saying, why don't we start with Bananagrams? 1818 01:23:53,239 --> 01:23:54,437 No! 1819 01:23:54,439 --> 01:23:55,836 Why would we change it? 1820 01:23:55,838 --> 01:23:56,936 What are you talking about? 1821 01:23:56,938 --> 01:23:58,337 It's the best game in the-- It's why we come here. 1822 01:23:58,339 --> 01:23:59,304 Okay. 1823 01:23:59,306 --> 01:24:00,406 Hey, hey, hey... 1824 01:24:11,039 --> 01:24:12,572 Hey guys, wait, don't start without me. 1825 01:24:17,172 --> 01:24:18,836 Come on, y'all. 1826 01:24:18,838 --> 01:24:20,470 None of this fighting shit. Come on. 1827 01:24:20,472 --> 01:24:22,370 Fun weekend. Let's go. Come on, honey. 1828 01:24:22,372 --> 01:24:23,570 -Yeah. -Okay. 1829 01:24:23,572 --> 01:24:25,170 -Remember what I said. -I know. 1830 01:24:25,172 --> 01:24:26,870 -Jesus. -Did they start without us? 1831 01:24:26,872 --> 01:24:28,537 -No. I told them not to. -Okay. 1832 01:24:28,539 --> 01:24:30,170 -Yeah, so, it's our time to ask. -All right. 1833 01:24:30,172 --> 01:24:31,238 Obviously I meant... 1834 01:24:31,240 --> 01:24:32,404 Are you sure? Okay. 1835 01:24:32,406 --> 01:24:33,936 Look, I have four left. 1836 01:24:33,938 --> 01:24:35,238 Well, you think. 1837 01:24:35,240 --> 01:24:36,472 Wait, wait. I can't see. I can't see. 1838 01:24:37,072 --> 01:24:39,304 I-- Ho-- Whoa, whoa, whoa. 1839 01:24:39,306 --> 01:24:41,271 Mm-mmm. -Hold on. 1840 01:24:41,273 --> 01:24:42,537 God, I'd love to know what this process is. 1841 01:24:42,539 --> 01:24:45,271 Second floor-- I know! Gosh! 1842 01:24:45,273 --> 01:24:47,370 I know. What? 1843 01:24:47,372 --> 01:24:49,903 -Does this person-- -Guys, we gotta get serious now. 1844 01:24:49,905 --> 01:24:52,003 Does your person hold on to library books 1845 01:24:52,005 --> 01:24:53,037 past their due date? 1846 01:24:53,039 --> 01:24:54,404 Yes! 1847 01:24:54,406 --> 01:24:56,103 -That's a good one! -Yes, yes. 1848 01:24:56,105 --> 01:24:57,170 -No, no, no. No. -No. That's a librarian. 1849 01:24:57,172 --> 01:24:58,304 -Yeah. -Keep her up. 1850 01:24:58,306 --> 01:24:59,238 -No. -You know, every year, 1851 01:24:59,240 --> 01:25:00,836 -this does not end well. -No. 1852 01:25:00,838 --> 01:25:02,370 -No. Does not keep it past the-- -These two. 1853 01:25:02,372 --> 01:25:03,537 This person does not. 1854 01:25:03,539 --> 01:25:05,037 No. It's this person does. 1855 01:25:05,039 --> 01:25:06,170 It's this person, it's this person. 1856 01:25:06,172 --> 01:25:07,103 Okay, we're ready to make a guess. 1857 01:25:07,105 --> 01:25:08,204 Okay. Is your person... 1858 01:25:08,206 --> 01:25:09,105 -...Joan? -Joan. 1859 01:25:09,306 --> 01:25:12,003 Joan! Oh my God! 1860 01:25:12,005 --> 01:25:14,070 Yes! Yeah! 1861 01:25:14,072 --> 01:25:16,037 How good was that! 1862 01:25:16,039 --> 01:25:17,206 How good was that! 1863 01:25:20,139 --> 01:25:20,972 Hey. 1864 01:25:23,206 --> 01:25:24,439 -Hey, man. -What are you doing? 1865 01:25:26,273 --> 01:25:27,805 Just having a smoke. 1866 01:25:30,306 --> 01:25:32,072 -Sit with you? -Yeah. 1867 01:25:35,139 --> 01:25:36,240 Starting to rain. 1868 01:25:43,039 --> 01:25:44,304 Not gonna ask me what I was doing 1869 01:25:44,306 --> 01:25:45,970 coming out of the fucking darkness? 1870 01:25:45,972 --> 01:25:48,539 Sorry, man. What were you doing? 1871 01:25:52,872 --> 01:25:54,372 I just want to say... 1872 01:25:55,838 --> 01:25:57,139 I gotta hand it to you. 1873 01:25:58,606 --> 01:26:01,039 -You do? -Yeah. You look happy. 1874 01:26:03,339 --> 01:26:06,572 Happier than you've been in a... long time. 1875 01:26:09,372 --> 01:26:10,472 Okay. 1876 01:26:11,339 --> 01:26:13,140 If anything, you're an inspiration. 1877 01:26:14,072 --> 01:26:16,037 I mean, you're proof positive that it's never too late 1878 01:26:16,039 --> 01:26:18,273 for a man of a certain age to turn his life around, you know? 1879 01:26:19,140 --> 01:26:20,206 Make a fresh start. 1880 01:26:20,905 --> 01:26:23,339 Find out who you really are. 1881 01:26:25,372 --> 01:26:26,404 Thank you, man. 1882 01:26:26,406 --> 01:26:28,070 Right. 1883 01:26:28,072 --> 01:26:30,404 Which is why I'm gonna ask Christine for a divorce. 1884 01:26:30,406 --> 01:26:31,504 What? 1885 01:26:31,506 --> 01:26:32,539 Yeah. 1886 01:26:33,072 --> 01:26:34,406 No. I hear ya. 1887 01:26:35,206 --> 01:26:37,005 I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna take control. 1888 01:26:37,838 --> 01:26:39,506 No, what are you talking about, man? 1889 01:26:39,872 --> 01:26:41,204 I just told you. You inspired me. 1890 01:26:41,206 --> 01:26:42,604 No, no, no. I didn't inspire you... 1891 01:26:42,606 --> 01:26:43,972 Yeah. You did. 1892 01:26:47,240 --> 01:26:48,970 I've been unhappy for such a long time. 1893 01:26:48,972 --> 01:26:50,604 I was just too chicken-shit to ever do anything about it. 1894 01:26:50,606 --> 01:26:52,104 No. Don't do this, man. 1895 01:26:52,106 --> 01:26:52,972 -Don't do it. -Why not? 1896 01:26:53,938 --> 01:26:55,171 Our son's going to college. 1897 01:26:55,173 --> 01:26:58,106 If I get this job, it shoots in Texas. 1898 01:26:59,039 --> 01:27:01,003 I've never auditioned for anything outside the city 1899 01:27:01,005 --> 01:27:02,570 'cause I never wanted to be away from Jay. 1900 01:27:02,572 --> 01:27:03,872 That's over. 1901 01:27:05,372 --> 01:27:07,005 I want to be happy. 1902 01:27:07,339 --> 01:27:09,171 Okay, that's fine. But that doesn't mean that you-- 1903 01:27:09,173 --> 01:27:11,539 -Don't you want me to be happy? -No, of course I do, man. 1904 01:27:11,972 --> 01:27:13,306 Look... 1905 01:27:15,306 --> 01:27:17,005 Give me one good reason why I shouldn't. 1906 01:27:24,240 --> 01:27:26,905 'Stache feels right. Feels good. 1907 01:27:33,339 --> 01:27:36,439 -Sorry. Kinda small, right? -Hmm. 1908 01:27:40,506 --> 01:27:41,972 You need more blankets? 1909 01:27:42,372 --> 01:27:43,836 -No. I think I'm-- -Are you sure? 1910 01:27:43,838 --> 01:27:45,204 This one's kinda old. 1911 01:27:45,206 --> 01:27:47,204 No, they seem, they seem okay. That's-- 1912 01:27:47,206 --> 01:27:48,470 -Okay. Any more pillows? -I'm good. 1913 01:27:48,472 --> 01:27:49,838 Anything? 1914 01:27:50,106 --> 01:27:51,570 No, this is great. Thank you. 1915 01:27:51,572 --> 01:27:54,073 Sorry. I know it's not the biggest couch in the world. 1916 01:27:54,872 --> 01:27:56,339 It's gonna be fine. Thank you. 1917 01:27:57,406 --> 01:27:58,572 You want to know my secret? 1918 01:28:01,439 --> 01:28:02,372 Do I? 1919 01:28:02,838 --> 01:28:03,506 Yeah. 1920 01:28:05,106 --> 01:28:07,173 The real reason I despise you. 1921 01:28:09,472 --> 01:28:10,306 Yeah, I guess. 1922 01:28:13,040 --> 01:28:14,805 It's because you remind me of myself. 1923 01:28:16,872 --> 01:28:18,439 Surprise. 1924 01:28:19,938 --> 01:28:22,537 And watching you wither away all these years 1925 01:28:22,539 --> 01:28:25,970 just keeps reminding me of how hot you used to be. 1926 01:28:25,972 --> 01:28:27,537 How funny you were. 1927 01:28:27,539 --> 01:28:28,938 Just, magnetic. 1928 01:28:31,838 --> 01:28:33,470 I was even attracted to you back in the day. 1929 01:28:33,472 --> 01:28:35,439 And I'm not hitting on you, I'm just making a point. 1930 01:28:37,206 --> 01:28:39,204 Watching you disappear in front of my eyes 1931 01:28:39,206 --> 01:28:43,306 has just been this fucking reminder to me. 1932 01:28:45,306 --> 01:28:46,905 That marriage doesn't fucking work. 1933 01:28:48,938 --> 01:28:50,372 I mean, it didn't work for my parents. 1934 01:28:51,539 --> 01:28:54,104 I literally watched it kill them. 1935 01:28:54,106 --> 01:28:55,437 And then it killed you. 1936 01:28:55,439 --> 01:28:57,805 And now it's doing the same thing to me. 1937 01:29:00,106 --> 01:29:03,836 And I wake up every day, 1938 01:29:03,838 --> 01:29:07,040 and the first thing I feel is anger. 1939 01:29:08,838 --> 01:29:11,106 I'm just fucking angry all the time. 1940 01:29:12,539 --> 01:29:14,537 So, yes, when I see you, I see me. 1941 01:29:14,539 --> 01:29:16,472 And I just fucking lash out, you know? 1942 01:29:19,306 --> 01:29:21,040 I'll deny we ever had this conversation. 1943 01:29:22,439 --> 01:29:23,306 Okay. 1944 01:29:25,306 --> 01:29:26,870 But I'm glad we talked. 1945 01:29:26,872 --> 01:29:28,273 It's like we needed it, maybe? 1946 01:29:30,206 --> 01:29:31,539 Yeah. Get some sleep. 1947 01:30:18,006 --> 01:30:22,504 ♪ Amazing grace ♪ 1948 01:30:22,506 --> 01:30:23,973 Morning. 1949 01:30:25,073 --> 01:30:29,206 ♪ How sweet the sound ♪ 1950 01:30:31,439 --> 01:30:36,973 ♪ That saved a wretch ♪ 1951 01:30:37,306 --> 01:30:41,838 ♪ Like me ♪ 1952 01:30:42,372 --> 01:30:48,073 ♪ I once was lost ♪ 1953 01:30:48,539 --> 01:30:54,238 ♪ But now am found ♪ 1954 01:30:54,240 --> 01:30:56,971 ♪ Was blind ♪ 1955 01:30:56,973 --> 01:31:02,836 ♪ But now I see ♪ 1956 01:31:02,838 --> 01:31:05,570 Ooh. 1957 01:31:05,572 --> 01:31:11,238 ♪ Amazing grace ♪ 1958 01:31:11,240 --> 01:31:16,572 ♪ How sweet the sound ♪ 1959 01:31:17,173 --> 01:31:22,604 ♪ That saved a wretch ♪ 1960 01:31:22,606 --> 01:31:27,006 ♪ Like me ♪ 1961 01:31:28,906 --> 01:31:29,937 How'd you sleep? 1962 01:31:29,939 --> 01:31:31,372 -Amazing. -Yeah? 1963 01:31:33,040 --> 01:31:34,971 -Really good. -Did you? 1964 01:31:34,973 --> 01:31:36,839 -The couch is good. -Is it? 1965 01:31:38,939 --> 01:31:40,337 I got it. 1966 01:31:40,339 --> 01:31:45,606 ♪ Was blind, but now... ♪ 1967 01:31:47,106 --> 01:31:48,240 -Yeah. -You know? 1968 01:31:49,206 --> 01:31:53,040 I know it's been a difficult time for... some. 1969 01:31:53,539 --> 01:31:55,006 A lot of change. 1970 01:31:55,939 --> 01:31:57,439 But that's okay. 1971 01:31:58,073 --> 01:32:01,240 Um... You know, I read a line in a book once. 1972 01:32:02,006 --> 01:32:03,537 I don't remember exactly how it goes, 1973 01:32:03,539 --> 01:32:05,038 but it was something like, 1974 01:32:05,040 --> 01:32:08,406 "People change. But love always stays the same." 1975 01:32:09,973 --> 01:32:11,106 Anybody? 1976 01:32:12,306 --> 01:32:15,604 Mmm. Yeah, I don't see how that relates exactly, but okay. 1977 01:32:15,606 --> 01:32:17,937 -No. I loved it. I loved it. -It's really nice. 1978 01:32:17,939 --> 01:32:18,937 -I think it's nice. -Actually, 1979 01:32:18,939 --> 01:32:20,372 since you brought it up. 1980 01:32:20,973 --> 01:32:23,470 I have my own toast that I would like to make 1981 01:32:23,472 --> 01:32:24,937 to a very special friend of mine. 1982 01:32:24,939 --> 01:32:25,937 Oh, thank you. 1983 01:32:25,939 --> 01:32:27,238 -Her name is Tess. -Oh. 1984 01:32:27,240 --> 01:32:28,904 Um, as you all know, 1985 01:32:28,906 --> 01:32:30,904 she recently returned to her life's passion. 1986 01:32:30,906 --> 01:32:32,171 Mmm. Okay. 1987 01:32:32,173 --> 01:32:33,537 And even though she's only been at it 1988 01:32:33,539 --> 01:32:35,238 for a short period of time... 1989 01:32:35,240 --> 01:32:36,404 What, like a few months? 1990 01:32:36,406 --> 01:32:37,439 Yeah, but-- 1991 01:32:37,973 --> 01:32:40,071 No, this is amazing. 1992 01:32:40,073 --> 01:32:43,537 She has already been asked to be the assistant coach 1993 01:32:43,539 --> 01:32:46,171 for the US Women's Team, 1994 01:32:46,173 --> 01:32:48,171 -LA '28! -What? 1995 01:32:48,173 --> 01:32:50,204 -What? Oh my God! -No decisions, guys. 1996 01:32:50,206 --> 01:32:51,271 No. It's just... 1997 01:32:51,273 --> 01:32:52,537 -You! Get up here! -No. 1998 01:32:52,539 --> 01:32:54,337 -Yes, please. -Come here. Oh, my God. 1999 01:32:54,339 --> 01:32:55,372 That is so... 2000 01:32:58,073 --> 01:33:01,470 Okay. So, it was not supposed to go down like that. 2001 01:33:01,472 --> 01:33:02,238 Don't worry about it. It's totally fine. 2002 01:33:02,240 --> 01:33:03,537 I'm really sorry she announced it. 2003 01:33:03,539 --> 01:33:05,038 She happened to be at the house. 2004 01:33:05,040 --> 01:33:06,138 It's okay. It's great. 2005 01:33:06,140 --> 01:33:07,304 It's great news! 2006 01:33:07,306 --> 01:33:08,271 It's just such a big deal to tell you. 2007 01:33:08,273 --> 01:33:09,837 -I know. -But it is a big deal. 2008 01:33:09,839 --> 01:33:11,038 -It's big-- a huge deal. -Right? That they asked me. 2009 01:33:11,040 --> 01:33:12,337 That's so-- You deserve it, too. 2010 01:33:12,339 --> 01:33:14,171 But I have no idea if I want to do it. 2011 01:33:14,173 --> 01:33:15,904 -You should. -It would be a lot. 2012 01:33:15,906 --> 01:33:18,871 It would be a lot. You know. 2013 01:33:18,873 --> 01:33:20,370 And the boys. And... 2014 01:33:20,372 --> 01:33:22,171 -Actually, you know what? -I don't know how I feel. 2015 01:33:22,173 --> 01:33:23,570 I don't even know what it would be like, 2016 01:33:23,572 --> 01:33:25,273 -or what the commitment is. -Look at, look at this. 2017 01:33:26,472 --> 01:33:28,104 -What? -Something funny I just-- 2018 01:33:28,106 --> 01:33:29,240 Look at that. 2019 01:33:29,906 --> 01:33:31,604 -That's you. -Wait. Where is this? 2020 01:33:31,606 --> 01:33:33,837 That's-- I found that photo of you 2021 01:33:33,839 --> 01:33:36,404 and I blew it up and I put it on the wall of my apartment. 2022 01:33:36,406 --> 01:33:37,570 'Cause I wanted the boys to see 2023 01:33:37,572 --> 01:33:38,839 what a fucking legend their mom is. 2024 01:33:41,106 --> 01:33:44,806 Why didn't you pick a photo of me with the kids for your wall? 2025 01:33:45,273 --> 01:33:49,204 No, because I got a photo of you at the height of your power. 2026 01:33:49,206 --> 01:33:51,238 Look at you. Look how high you are. 2027 01:33:51,240 --> 01:33:53,038 That is sick! I mean, are you kidding? 2028 01:33:53,040 --> 01:33:56,204 Just be like... Smash! You know? 2029 01:33:56,206 --> 01:33:59,038 Like, that's unbelievable. It's their favorite thing. 2030 01:33:59,040 --> 01:34:01,506 I love it, too. I think-- That photo is awesome. 2031 01:34:03,173 --> 01:34:04,306 It's not me now. 2032 01:34:08,206 --> 01:34:09,140 Yeah, it is. 2033 01:34:11,873 --> 01:34:12,939 No, it isn't. 2034 01:34:14,106 --> 01:34:14,973 Here. 2035 01:34:19,040 --> 01:34:21,004 Do you have to sleep till like two fucking thirty every day? 2036 01:34:21,006 --> 01:34:22,238 Why? Did people wake up already? 2037 01:34:22,240 --> 01:34:23,306 Oh, my God. 2038 01:34:24,006 --> 01:34:25,873 What are we looking at? Oh! 2039 01:34:26,973 --> 01:34:27,971 I'm not sure what's happening right now. 2040 01:34:27,973 --> 01:34:28,939 I'm upset. 2041 01:34:29,939 --> 01:34:31,006 That's what's happening. 2042 01:34:31,372 --> 01:34:32,273 Okay. 2043 01:34:34,140 --> 01:34:36,240 You can upset me, and I can upset you. 2044 01:34:37,106 --> 01:34:38,173 Right? 2045 01:34:38,906 --> 01:34:40,539 It's what happens in a relationship. 2046 01:34:41,406 --> 01:34:44,339 I never said that we couldn't get upset. 2047 01:34:47,073 --> 01:34:48,973 I know you were trying to do a nice thing. 2048 01:34:53,306 --> 01:34:56,339 It hurt my feelings. Let's go in. 2049 01:34:58,539 --> 01:35:01,271 Are you... Do you still want me to come to the attic tonight? 2050 01:35:01,273 --> 01:35:03,406 What? 2051 01:35:05,273 --> 01:35:06,171 What about this? 2052 01:35:06,173 --> 01:35:07,306 That's fine. 2053 01:35:08,106 --> 01:35:09,339 -Space? -Okay. Jesus. 2054 01:35:12,572 --> 01:35:13,939 I'm starving. 2055 01:35:14,939 --> 01:35:16,904 Well, why don't you use a spoon like a person? 2056 01:35:16,906 --> 01:35:19,140 Oh. Well, I don't want to dirty any more dishes. 2057 01:35:19,506 --> 01:35:21,437 Well, we can wash them in the morning. 2058 01:35:21,439 --> 01:35:22,806 Oh, okay. 2059 01:35:24,372 --> 01:35:26,006 It's so good with my fingers. 2060 01:35:29,240 --> 01:35:30,971 Shouldn't have done that one thing, you know? 2061 01:35:30,973 --> 01:35:32,472 Jesus Christ. 2062 01:35:54,472 --> 01:35:57,171 House is busy tonight. 2063 01:35:57,173 --> 01:35:58,873 Anybody see you come up? 2064 01:35:59,173 --> 01:36:01,138 No, everybody was kind of in their own world. 2065 01:36:01,140 --> 01:36:04,370 I was watching this video of a therapist talking to couples, 2066 01:36:04,372 --> 01:36:08,071 and had them, as a healthy exercise, 2067 01:36:08,073 --> 01:36:10,006 ask each other what they don't like about each other. 2068 01:36:12,306 --> 01:36:14,372 That you slept with somebody, for starters. 2069 01:36:15,040 --> 01:36:16,837 Well, I only did because I thought you were 2070 01:36:16,839 --> 01:36:17,472 and I was jealous. 2071 01:36:19,106 --> 01:36:21,271 How you never respond to photos I send you. 2072 01:36:21,273 --> 01:36:23,004 Photos you always ask for. 2073 01:36:23,006 --> 01:36:25,171 I always send a thumbs-up or a heart emoji or something. 2074 01:36:25,173 --> 01:36:26,937 I'm sitting there, rushing around, 2075 01:36:26,939 --> 01:36:30,339 trying to get some perfect angle of a photo for them. 2076 01:36:30,939 --> 01:36:32,904 Just so that... You know, 2077 01:36:32,906 --> 01:36:34,404 I just felt like a psycho. 2078 01:36:34,406 --> 01:36:36,971 Feel like an idiot, knowing you could care less. 2079 01:36:36,973 --> 01:36:38,372 I love getting those photos. That's not true. 2080 01:36:40,040 --> 01:36:41,906 How quiet you got at home. 2081 01:36:43,939 --> 01:36:45,337 As if you were a different person 2082 01:36:45,339 --> 01:36:46,605 than you are with everybody else. 2083 01:36:46,607 --> 01:36:48,304 That drove me crazy. 2084 01:36:48,306 --> 01:36:51,071 Well... no, first... 2085 01:36:51,073 --> 01:36:52,971 Jeez, you're good at this game. 2086 01:36:52,973 --> 01:36:54,540 First that confused me. 2087 01:36:55,173 --> 01:36:57,372 Then made me sad, then drove me crazy. 2088 01:37:00,240 --> 01:37:02,806 As if we clearly weren't interesting enough for you. 2089 01:37:03,540 --> 01:37:05,273 I wasn't. 2090 01:37:07,339 --> 01:37:08,939 It was like you weren't even there. 2091 01:37:10,540 --> 01:37:11,973 I wasn't there? 2092 01:37:12,906 --> 01:37:15,104 -You checked out. -Me? 2093 01:37:15,106 --> 01:37:16,571 Just like you would after a loss. 2094 01:37:16,573 --> 01:37:18,004 Except for I wouldn't know the cause, 2095 01:37:18,006 --> 01:37:19,439 and so I'm just like, alone. 2096 01:37:21,273 --> 01:37:23,607 Well, good thing we aren't together. 2097 01:37:27,439 --> 01:37:28,806 Aren't we? 2098 01:37:29,806 --> 01:37:33,073 Well, I don't think us hiding is us back together. 2099 01:37:33,507 --> 01:37:35,573 Well, what do you care what anyone thinks, anyway? 2100 01:37:37,372 --> 01:37:38,906 Maybe I'm embarrassed. 2101 01:37:39,839 --> 01:37:40,939 By what? 2102 01:37:43,006 --> 01:37:44,406 -Me. -Why? 2103 01:37:47,372 --> 01:37:49,273 'Cause I don't know if you even love me. 2104 01:37:53,406 --> 01:37:56,173 You love some idea of me, hanging on your wall. 2105 01:37:57,906 --> 01:37:59,904 But not the woman you're looking at right now, 2106 01:37:59,906 --> 01:38:01,304 -in front of you -Don't tell me 2107 01:38:01,306 --> 01:38:02,471 -in this moment. -how I feel and think. 2108 01:38:02,473 --> 01:38:03,573 That's not-- 2109 01:38:05,473 --> 01:38:07,971 I mean, maybe I don't love you. I don't know. 2110 01:38:07,973 --> 01:38:10,104 Maybe I fucked you because you fucked that woman, 2111 01:38:10,106 --> 01:38:12,038 or 'cause it felt good to hear you say 2112 01:38:12,040 --> 01:38:13,370 you missed me in front of strangers, 2113 01:38:13,372 --> 01:38:15,138 -which is... embarrassing. -Whoa, whoa, whoa. 2114 01:38:15,140 --> 01:38:17,238 It was a stupid fucking thing I did, and I hate myself for it. 2115 01:38:17,240 --> 01:38:21,038 Why? We had no responsibility to each other. 2116 01:38:21,040 --> 01:38:22,937 Even now, there's no real commitment. 2117 01:38:22,939 --> 01:38:24,571 -Of course there is. -To what? 2118 01:38:24,573 --> 01:38:26,505 To making each other happy. 2119 01:38:26,507 --> 01:38:28,238 Because we're doing things that make us happy 2120 01:38:28,240 --> 01:38:29,571 as individuals now. 2121 01:38:29,573 --> 01:38:31,571 And if we're happy, that's it. 2122 01:38:31,573 --> 01:38:34,238 Then we make the people we love happy too. 2123 01:38:34,240 --> 01:38:36,140 That's it? What are you, eight years old? 2124 01:38:37,006 --> 01:38:39,204 A real relationship 2125 01:38:39,206 --> 01:38:42,271 is finding somebody you can also be unhappy with. 2126 01:38:42,273 --> 01:38:43,507 Somebody who has your back. 2127 01:38:45,073 --> 01:38:47,372 We stopped having each other's backs. 2128 01:38:47,573 --> 01:38:50,206 I always tried to have your back. Are you kidding me? 2129 01:38:50,939 --> 01:38:52,337 There just wasn't enough room 2130 01:38:52,339 --> 01:38:53,605 because had to have your own back. 2131 01:38:53,607 --> 01:38:55,871 There wasn't any room left on your back. 2132 01:38:55,873 --> 01:38:58,271 Trust me, I heard. "Alex, he loves it so much. 2133 01:38:58,273 --> 01:38:59,571 He's always there for you. 2134 01:38:59,573 --> 01:39:01,605 He goes to everything. He loves it." 2135 01:39:01,607 --> 01:39:04,440 -I did. -Yeah? And when I retired? 2136 01:39:07,607 --> 01:39:11,071 When I let go of the thing I loved since I was 11? 2137 01:39:11,073 --> 01:39:12,140 You shut off. 2138 01:39:14,240 --> 01:39:15,971 You said you felt alone? 2139 01:39:15,973 --> 01:39:18,806 Baby, you left me alone years ago in this relationship. 2140 01:39:23,473 --> 01:39:25,006 Okay, you want to know the truth? 2141 01:39:25,507 --> 01:39:26,573 Yes. 2142 01:39:27,006 --> 01:39:28,140 I wasn't the downer. 2143 01:39:29,839 --> 01:39:30,806 You were. 2144 01:39:37,273 --> 01:39:40,473 You're right. I was a downer. 2145 01:39:43,373 --> 01:39:46,140 After years of dedicating myself to a thing, 2146 01:39:46,906 --> 01:39:48,006 I thought I could just stop. 2147 01:39:50,206 --> 01:39:53,407 And have my own children, and you be the replacement. 2148 01:39:57,340 --> 01:39:58,540 I did. 2149 01:40:01,440 --> 01:40:02,438 Never acknowledging 2150 01:40:02,440 --> 01:40:05,305 that it was the end of this whole other life, 2151 01:40:05,307 --> 01:40:07,540 or where I was gonna put all those feelings. 2152 01:40:07,973 --> 01:40:10,371 And then I was doing six years of in vitro, 2153 01:40:10,373 --> 01:40:12,471 and injecting myself full of all those chemicals, 2154 01:40:12,473 --> 01:40:14,271 whatever that was doing. 2155 01:40:14,273 --> 01:40:16,507 And by the way, and I love that challenge. 2156 01:40:18,307 --> 01:40:23,338 But I was having trouble with you and them 2157 01:40:23,340 --> 01:40:26,973 being the only thing fulfilling me. 2158 01:40:30,173 --> 01:40:32,873 And you knew I was struggling. 2159 01:40:34,440 --> 01:40:36,540 But that I was too proud to ever ask for help. 2160 01:40:38,307 --> 01:40:39,873 You hid behind that. 2161 01:40:41,839 --> 01:40:43,571 And I felt relieved. 2162 01:40:43,573 --> 01:40:45,405 That you never asked. 2163 01:40:45,407 --> 01:40:48,173 Because then I could avoid it too. 2164 01:40:48,473 --> 01:40:49,971 I couldn't ask you that. 2165 01:40:49,973 --> 01:40:51,837 -Of course you could. -No! 2166 01:40:51,839 --> 01:40:53,040 -Of course you could. -Baby, baby... 2167 01:40:54,373 --> 01:40:55,837 You left me alone. 2168 01:40:55,839 --> 01:40:57,305 I left you alone? 2169 01:40:57,307 --> 01:40:59,138 You checked out. 2170 01:40:59,140 --> 01:41:00,871 You think that was fun to be around? 2171 01:41:00,873 --> 01:41:03,438 I don't want to go back to that. I won't! 2172 01:41:03,440 --> 01:41:05,272 -So what are you saying then? -What I'm s-- 2173 01:41:05,274 --> 01:41:07,038 Fuck! Oh, fucking stupid-- 2174 01:41:07,040 --> 01:41:08,171 What the fuck? 2175 01:41:08,173 --> 01:41:10,038 Jesus fucking Christ, Christine! 2176 01:41:10,040 --> 01:41:12,405 Why don't you mind your own fucking business for once? 2177 01:41:12,407 --> 01:41:13,904 Whoa. 2178 01:41:13,906 --> 01:41:15,440 Maybe take care of your own shit first. 2179 01:41:15,939 --> 01:41:17,071 What the fuck is that supposed to mean? 2180 01:41:17,073 --> 01:41:18,906 ...comedy, make some noise right now! 2181 01:41:19,407 --> 01:41:22,939 For my main man, the one and only, Alex Novak everybody! 2182 01:41:50,540 --> 01:41:52,173 Fucking relationships suck. 2183 01:41:55,407 --> 01:41:57,171 And I don't mean that they-- they're like a downer. 2184 01:41:57,173 --> 01:41:58,839 I mean, they fucking suck. 2185 01:42:00,906 --> 01:42:02,904 I don't think you're fucking hearing what I'm trying to say. 2186 01:42:02,906 --> 01:42:05,004 I'm telling you that relationships suck. 2187 01:42:05,006 --> 01:42:07,605 Like, if you are in a relationship with somebody, 2188 01:42:07,607 --> 01:42:09,104 they are literally trying to suck 2189 01:42:09,106 --> 01:42:10,274 the fucking life out of you. 2190 01:42:12,274 --> 01:42:14,307 Okay? They're fucking vampires. 2191 01:42:17,973 --> 01:42:20,205 And the moment that you're happy, fucking look out. 2192 01:42:20,207 --> 01:42:22,138 The moment that you are fucking happy, 2193 01:42:22,140 --> 01:42:25,871 they see that as pure, unfiltered fucking blood, 2194 01:42:25,873 --> 01:42:28,038 and they will suck it right out of your fucking body 2195 01:42:28,040 --> 01:42:30,605 until you are gaunt and fucking drained. 2196 01:42:30,607 --> 01:42:33,272 And they will take every fucking morsel of it out. 2197 01:42:33,274 --> 01:42:36,873 Because you know why? Because happiness is the sun to them. 2198 01:42:37,507 --> 01:42:40,305 Okay? Happiness is like a stake to the fucking heart. 2199 01:42:40,307 --> 01:42:41,571 They don't want it. 2200 01:42:41,573 --> 01:42:43,839 They don't want you to be fucking happy. 2201 01:42:45,040 --> 01:42:46,505 And there are only two ways out 2202 01:42:46,507 --> 01:42:50,205 of this fucking bleak, miserable existence. 2203 01:42:50,207 --> 01:42:53,106 You either become one of them or you fucking die. 2204 01:42:55,006 --> 01:42:56,141 Well, I don't want it. 2205 01:42:57,507 --> 01:43:00,939 I don't wanna be a fucking vampire. Okay? 2206 01:43:03,274 --> 01:43:05,373 I don't want it. 2207 01:43:23,906 --> 01:43:25,040 Dad. 2208 01:43:25,906 --> 01:43:26,904 What the fuck are you doing here? 2209 01:43:26,906 --> 01:43:28,006 Son, uh... 2210 01:43:28,973 --> 01:43:31,904 Well, I just came down to see what the fuss is. 2211 01:43:31,906 --> 01:43:33,305 Jesus... 2212 01:43:33,307 --> 01:43:36,573 You... really yelled at those guys. 2213 01:43:39,207 --> 01:43:42,038 Yeah, sorry, I don't really know what that all was. 2214 01:43:42,040 --> 01:43:47,107 Yeah, well, I wouldn't say it was funny, but it was, uh... 2215 01:43:48,340 --> 01:43:49,507 ...a bit dangerous. 2216 01:43:51,973 --> 01:43:52,937 -Dad, look-- -Son. 2217 01:43:52,939 --> 01:43:53,873 -No, Dad, listen-- -Son. 2218 01:43:55,307 --> 01:43:57,939 You're a decent man, Alex. 2219 01:43:59,006 --> 01:44:01,004 And you can give yourself 2220 01:44:01,006 --> 01:44:03,207 the grace to work through all of this. 2221 01:44:04,074 --> 01:44:05,274 You know? 2222 01:44:06,174 --> 01:44:07,937 Mom. 2223 01:44:07,939 --> 01:44:10,605 Yeah, well, we rub off on each other. That's a good thing. 2224 01:44:10,607 --> 01:44:14,373 Your mother and I, we're lucky like that. 2225 01:44:15,307 --> 01:44:16,407 It's rare. 2226 01:44:18,340 --> 01:44:22,241 It's really rare. You understand? 2227 01:44:29,074 --> 01:44:30,006 Okay. 2228 01:44:31,174 --> 01:44:32,473 It's okay. Come on. 2229 01:44:33,839 --> 01:44:34,806 Come on. 2230 01:44:36,041 --> 01:44:36,973 Hey. 2231 01:44:37,939 --> 01:44:39,141 There you go. 2232 01:44:42,573 --> 01:44:44,505 Now. 2233 01:44:44,507 --> 01:44:46,438 I'm sorry... I'm sorry about... 2234 01:44:46,440 --> 01:44:48,871 You-- You don't have to be sorry about anything. 2235 01:44:48,873 --> 01:44:52,205 Life happens to us, you know? 2236 01:44:52,207 --> 01:44:54,904 What we have to do is recognize 2237 01:44:54,906 --> 01:44:57,041 where we stand and what's good about it. 2238 01:44:59,307 --> 01:45:00,274 It's gonna be okay. 2239 01:45:01,241 --> 01:45:03,141 Yeah? You work it through. 2240 01:45:06,007 --> 01:45:08,041 As for this, next time... 2241 01:45:09,873 --> 01:45:11,107 a few more jokes. 2242 01:45:12,007 --> 01:45:13,373 -See you. -See ya. 2243 01:45:14,440 --> 01:45:16,141 I'll add a joke. 2244 01:46:00,540 --> 01:46:03,571 Hey, man. I got bagels. 2245 01:46:03,573 --> 01:46:05,041 Oh, for fuck's sake. 2246 01:46:06,440 --> 01:46:09,141 So, they didn't say it, like, outright, 2247 01:46:10,041 --> 01:46:12,305 but my agent did tell me that production 2248 01:46:12,307 --> 01:46:14,473 called them, like, several times. 2249 01:46:14,906 --> 01:46:16,338 Maybe they want their hat back. 2250 01:46:16,340 --> 01:46:18,473 Will you just let me dream, bro? 2251 01:46:19,107 --> 01:46:20,473 No, you're probably right. 2252 01:46:21,207 --> 01:46:22,972 Look, man, I think it's great that you got the job 2253 01:46:22,974 --> 01:46:25,837 and that you had that experience, but... 2254 01:46:25,839 --> 01:46:27,205 I don't know, now that you're back in town, 2255 01:46:27,207 --> 01:46:30,005 don't you think maybe it's time that you face reality? 2256 01:46:30,007 --> 01:46:33,239 I have no delusions. Okay? 2257 01:46:33,241 --> 01:46:37,172 I know they killed my character, but just think about it. 2258 01:46:37,174 --> 01:46:40,072 What if they bring him back as a ghost seeking revenge? 2259 01:46:40,074 --> 01:46:41,405 I sketched out this little storyline 2260 01:46:41,407 --> 01:46:42,905 I'm gonna send to production. 2261 01:46:42,907 --> 01:46:44,940 But I'm definitely gonna give the hat back first. 2262 01:46:45,607 --> 01:46:47,873 But you never know. I'm a good writer. 2263 01:46:49,174 --> 01:46:50,440 I was talking about your marriage. 2264 01:46:51,074 --> 01:46:53,407 Oh. What about it? 2265 01:46:54,274 --> 01:46:56,571 Well, I mean, just, everything, you know, with Christine 2266 01:46:56,573 --> 01:46:59,307 and you leaving her and all that. 2267 01:46:59,573 --> 01:47:01,573 Oh, no, no, no. No, we're good. 2268 01:47:02,607 --> 01:47:04,239 -Really? -Yeah. 2269 01:47:04,241 --> 01:47:06,205 Yeah, yeah. We talked it out. 2270 01:47:06,207 --> 01:47:07,272 Yeah. 2271 01:47:07,274 --> 01:47:09,072 She said her piece-- 2272 01:47:09,074 --> 01:47:12,072 ...which was hard to hear, was good. 2273 01:47:12,074 --> 01:47:15,007 And then I said mine and then, yeah. Yeah. 2274 01:47:16,107 --> 01:47:17,837 Oh. Check this out. 2275 01:47:17,839 --> 01:47:20,538 She wants me to go back more than I do. 2276 01:47:20,540 --> 01:47:22,305 Yeah, she keeps saying, "You should just write them. 2277 01:47:22,307 --> 01:47:24,107 They need to bring back your character." 2278 01:47:25,440 --> 01:47:27,373 -Is that crazy? -Mmm. 2279 01:47:29,174 --> 01:47:30,074 Yeah. 2280 01:47:32,974 --> 01:47:34,340 Hey, man, is there, um... 2281 01:47:37,207 --> 01:47:39,074 Is there a chance that she's... 2282 01:47:40,440 --> 01:47:41,874 I don't know, that she wants you to... 2283 01:47:43,839 --> 01:47:45,407 I don't know, she wants to get some time away from you? 2284 01:47:47,573 --> 01:47:48,573 Why? 2285 01:47:48,974 --> 01:47:50,438 You'll be out of town or... 2286 01:47:50,440 --> 01:47:52,174 She came with me to Texas. 2287 01:47:52,874 --> 01:47:53,571 -Really? -Yeah. 2288 01:47:53,573 --> 01:47:55,005 She did? 2289 01:47:55,007 --> 01:47:56,407 Yeah. She was there all nine days. 2290 01:47:58,440 --> 01:48:00,007 It was her idea to steal the hat. 2291 01:48:01,141 --> 01:48:03,239 Yeah, she's like, thinks I look... 2292 01:48:03,241 --> 01:48:05,074 you know, really handsome. 2293 01:48:06,141 --> 01:48:07,373 Wow, I'm confused. 2294 01:48:08,974 --> 01:48:10,438 Yeah, well, confused is good. 2295 01:48:10,440 --> 01:48:12,274 I'm confused most of the time. 2296 01:48:12,974 --> 01:48:14,307 I just like being confused with her. 2297 01:48:16,207 --> 01:48:18,039 Who would have thought Jalen... 2298 01:48:18,041 --> 01:48:20,039 I love that guy... 2299 01:48:20,041 --> 01:48:22,107 but going away would be actually good for us? 2300 01:48:24,207 --> 01:48:25,974 -Hmm. -What is that behind me? 2301 01:48:28,041 --> 01:48:30,107 -That's a picture of Tess. -Oh. 2302 01:48:31,207 --> 01:48:32,907 I can't see her face. 2303 01:48:33,440 --> 01:48:35,072 Well, yeah, the photo's taken from behind. 2304 01:48:35,074 --> 01:48:37,074 Yeah, well, you should just turn her around. 2305 01:48:37,507 --> 01:48:39,373 Yeah, I don't think-- I don't think they can do that. 2306 01:48:41,440 --> 01:48:42,573 Someday. 2307 01:49:09,407 --> 01:49:11,872 She's competed every single night 2308 01:49:11,874 --> 01:49:13,305 of her college career. 2309 01:49:13,307 --> 01:49:15,239 She doesn't have as much international experience, 2310 01:49:15,241 --> 01:49:17,505 but to be able to grind through the Big Ten season 2311 01:49:17,507 --> 01:49:20,371 and make a big run in the tournament... 2312 01:49:20,373 --> 01:49:22,005 -She's got what it takes. -Played for John Cook too. 2313 01:49:22,007 --> 01:49:23,305 -John Cook. -Exactly. 2314 01:49:23,307 --> 01:49:25,139 Is that Rachel, 2315 01:49:25,141 --> 01:49:27,074 who Arch was saying came out of UVA? 2316 01:49:35,007 --> 01:49:36,107 -Hi. -Hey. 2317 01:49:37,074 --> 01:49:38,605 -Uh, is everything-- -Everything's fine, yeah. 2318 01:49:38,607 --> 01:49:40,105 I just dropped the boys off at school, 2319 01:49:40,107 --> 01:49:41,239 but I wanted to come by here 2320 01:49:41,241 --> 01:49:42,571 before I drove back to the city-- 2321 01:49:42,573 --> 01:49:44,239 I'm just in the middle of it 2322 01:49:44,241 --> 01:49:45,838 -with the coaching staff, so I-- -Okay. Okay, I just want-- 2323 01:49:45,840 --> 01:49:47,207 I just wanna show you something really quick. 2324 01:49:49,174 --> 01:49:51,972 -Look at that. -What is that, Alex? 2325 01:49:51,974 --> 01:49:54,072 It's you. It's you. First time you saw the minivan. 2326 01:49:54,074 --> 01:49:55,505 Look how unhappy you are. 2327 01:49:55,507 --> 01:49:56,940 It's my favorite thing. 2328 01:49:58,907 --> 01:49:59,807 I see that. 2329 01:50:01,507 --> 01:50:03,507 I realize that I was the one who was unhappy. 2330 01:50:06,407 --> 01:50:09,074 I was unhappy in our marriage. 2331 01:50:09,407 --> 01:50:12,174 I wasn't unhappy with our marriage. 2332 01:50:20,573 --> 01:50:22,207 I wanna be unhappy with you. 2333 01:50:25,974 --> 01:50:27,207 Let's be unhappy together. 2334 01:50:46,874 --> 01:50:49,172 Fuck! 2335 01:50:49,174 --> 01:50:50,274 I'll think about it. 2336 01:51:23,607 --> 01:51:27,272 ♪ Pressure Pushing down on me ♪ 2337 01:51:27,274 --> 01:51:30,340 Pressing down on you No man ask for 2338 01:51:31,373 --> 01:51:33,338 And in that moment, I stood up and I said, 2339 01:51:33,340 --> 01:51:36,907 "Hey. Your mom is not going anywhere... 2340 01:51:37,540 --> 01:51:39,573 till she helps me open this jar." 2341 01:51:47,907 --> 01:51:52,139 ♪ That's the terror of knowing What this world is about ♪ 2342 01:51:52,141 --> 01:51:54,872 ♪ Watching some good friends Screaming ♪ 2343 01:51:54,874 --> 01:51:56,305 ♪ "Let me out!" ♪ 2344 01:51:56,307 --> 01:52:00,007 ♪ Pray tomorrow takes us higher ♪ 2345 01:52:00,540 --> 01:52:04,172 ♪ Pressure on people People on streets ♪ 2346 01:52:04,174 --> 01:52:07,074 Mmm. 2347 01:52:10,141 --> 01:52:11,274 ♪ Okay ♪ 2348 01:52:13,340 --> 01:52:15,471 ♪ Chippin' around ♪ 2349 01:52:15,473 --> 01:52:17,305 ♪ Kick my brains 'Round the floor ♪ 2350 01:52:17,307 --> 01:52:21,172 ♪ These are the days It never rains, it just pours ♪ 2351 01:52:21,174 --> 01:52:22,974 ♪ People on streets ♪ 2352 01:52:25,307 --> 01:52:26,473 ♪ People on streets ♪ 2353 01:52:29,007 --> 01:52:33,305 ♪ It's the terror of knowing What this world is about ♪ 2354 01:52:33,307 --> 01:52:35,838 ♪ Watching some good friends Screaming ♪ 2355 01:52:35,840 --> 01:52:37,272 ♪ "Let me out!" ♪ 2356 01:52:37,274 --> 01:52:39,272 ♪ Pray tomorrow ♪ 2357 01:52:39,274 --> 01:52:41,471 ♪ Takes us Higher, higher, high ♪ 2358 01:52:41,473 --> 01:52:45,074 ♪ Pressure on people People on streets ♪ 2359 01:52:47,840 --> 01:52:51,174 ♪ Turned away from it all Like a blind man ♪ 2360 01:52:52,141 --> 01:52:55,107 ♪ Sat on a fence But it don't work ♪ 2361 01:52:55,974 --> 01:52:59,305 ♪ Keep coming up with love But it's so slashed and torn ♪ 2362 01:52:59,307 --> 01:53:04,874 ♪ Why, why, why ♪ 2363 01:53:10,473 --> 01:53:14,338 ♪ Love, love, love Love, love, love, love ♪ 2364 01:53:14,340 --> 01:53:18,239 ♪ Insanity laughs under pressure We're cracking ♪ 2365 01:53:18,241 --> 01:53:22,105 ♪ Can't we give ourselves One more chance? ♪ 2366 01:53:22,107 --> 01:53:26,072 ♪ Why can't we give love That one more chance? ♪ 2367 01:53:26,074 --> 01:53:30,005 ♪ Why can't we give love Give love ♪ 2368 01:53:30,007 --> 01:53:33,974 ♪ Give love, give love, Give love, give love... ♪ 2369 01:53:35,440 --> 01:53:40,272 ♪ 'Cause love's Such an old-fashioned word ♪ 2370 01:53:40,274 --> 01:53:44,905 ♪ And love dares you To care for ♪ 2371 01:53:44,907 --> 01:53:50,506 ♪ The people on The edge of the night ♪ 2372 01:53:50,508 --> 01:53:55,338 ♪ And love dares you to change Our way of ♪ 2373 01:53:55,340 --> 01:53:59,905 ♪ Caring about ourselves ♪ 2374 01:53:59,907 --> 01:54:03,905 ♪ This is our last dance ♪ 2375 01:54:03,907 --> 01:54:07,972 ♪ This is our last dance ♪ 2376 01:54:07,974 --> 01:54:09,207 ♪ This is ourselves ♪ 2377 01:54:12,407 --> 01:54:13,874 ♪ Under pressure ♪ 2378 01:54:16,174 --> 01:54:17,574 ♪ Under pressure ♪ 2379 01:54:20,874 --> 01:54:21,873 ♪ Pressure ♪ 162387