All language subtitles for The.Last.Drive-in.with.Joe.Bob.Briggs.S33E21.House.on.Haunted.Hill.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H.264-BFM_track4_[eng]

-♪ Hey, everybody,
have you heard the news? ♪

♪ Joe Bob is back in town ♪

♪ He's over at the drive-in,
hanging around ♪

♪ Watching crazy movies,
so come on down ♪

♪ To Joe Bob's
"Last Drive-In" show ♪

♪ Blood, beasties,
boobies, and more ♪

♪ Joe Bob's
"Last Drive-In" show ♪

♪ It's a spooky good time
with monsters and ghosts ♪

♪ Crazy, kooky fun with
the world's greatest host ♪

♪ Joe Bob's
"Last Drive-In" show ♪

♪ It's gonna be legendary ♪

♪ Joe Bob's
"Last Drive-In" show ♪

♪ It's gonna be very scary ♪

♪ Joe Bob's
"Last Drive-In" show ♪

♪ Let's go ♪

-Welcome
to haunted sleepover night!

-Whoo!
-Aha!

An evening of classics
that start out with

"I have a bad feeling,"

"I don't think
we should go in that place,

so let's go in."

Haunted houses are
just basics in horror.

Haunted houses are Horror 101,
right, Darcy?

-Yes.

Because we can all identify
with spooky things in the house.

-Darcy the Mail Girl,
ladies and gentlemen,

here to help me guide you
through the world

of doors and windows
and attics and basements and...

Haunted house stories
always use doors, windows,

staircases, hallways,
places of entrance and exit

to suggest that something is
there that shouldn't be there.

But I've been reading a lot
of horror scripts lately,

and I had this thought, Darcy.

- Oh, no.
- No?

Tell me if you agree with me
on this.

A lot of horror stories
waste a lot of time

explaining
why the characters are isolated,

alone, cut off from the world,
helpless.

-"My phone doesn't work here."
-Exactly.

But no filmmaker,
as far as I know,

has ever just set the story
in Point Nemo.

-We have no horror movies
about a Disney clownfish?

-No, this, Darcy, is Point Nemo,

the most isolated place
on the planet.

See? There's nothing here.

The remotest setting
for a movie.

In fact, the formal name
for this

is the oceanic point
of inaccessibility.

It's not claimed by any nation.

It's 1,670 miles
from the nearest land.

There are no shipping lanes
that go through there.

The water is about two
and a half miles deep.

It has the worst weather
in the world

because there's no land masses
around it to slow anything down,

so you have 70-foot waves.

If you manage
to get to Point Nemo on a boat,

the closest you'll get to
any other human being

will be the astronauts aboard
the International Space Station

when they pass sort of overhead
to the north about once a week,

because they're
only 250 miles away.

Is that isolated, Darcy?
-That is isolated.

-Okay, here's the best part.
-Okay.

-When spacecraft and satellites
go out of commission,

you got two choices.

You can push them
into deep space

where they just float forever.

But guess what?

You're never able to do that

because they don't have enough
fuel to just say, "Floor it.

Push this mother past
the gravitational
pull of the planet."

Takes a huge amount of force,

or your second choice is
crash 'em into the ocean.

But guess what?

If you decide to crash
something into the ocean,

the margin of error
is like a thousand miles.

You're trying to hit
the Gulf of Mexico,

and instead you kill
some old lady crossing

the street in Kentucky.

Nobody wants that, right?

So what you do is you point
that sucker at Point Nemo.

There are 250 wrecked spacecraft
on the ocean floor

right around Point Nemo.

Why aren't they making
horror movies there?

-Maybe because you can't get
there and nothing happens there?

-Well, but -- but here's
where I got this idea.

-Okay.
-Just last year,

two guys from England
went to Point Nemo

and jumped into the water

so they would become
the first human beings

to swim at Point Nemo.

They took video and everything,

but I'm thinking
that's not good enough.

Has to be one person.

If it's the loneliest place
on the planet,

you got to be lonely there.

Somebody's got to do
solo Point Nemo,

and then we'll send a crew
to make the movie.

-But then it wouldn't be solo.

-Well, you know,
we'll go one day later.

-Okay. And what
would your movie be about?

-Well, the two guys
that went there last year,

they got attacked
by an albatross.

That's how it could start out.

-Okay. Okay. That's one scene.
-But -- But look --

look what you got to work with.

-Okay.
-Isolation.

You can be damn sure
the phones don't work.

-True.
-Hostile environment.

-Okay.

-Potential
for vicious creatures

never dreamed of
by Jacques Cousteau.

-True.
-Endless black ocean.

Ancient alien sludge.

We put the cast in a submarine

where they're forced
to deal with one another

like in "Alien."
-Yes. That's creepy.

-They get a sonar signal
from 150,000 feet down,

and it's impossible for
anything to be alive down there,

but something is breathing.

And the crew members start
coughing up seaweed,

and the walls start sweating
blood, and somebody mutates.

-Mutation always works.

-Yes. Somebody mutates...
into a squid.

I don't know, Darcy. We'll
work out the details later.

But bio mutation fu,

and then something
floats up out of

the dead Russian spy satellite
that's on the ocean floor

and we go to the
Werner Herzog voiceover.

-Okay, now you've lost me.

-Yeah, me too,
but I'm just saying,

you want isolation,
you want remote?

Point Nemo.

-Did they really name it
after "Finding Nemo"?

-Well,
I think it's like that guy,

"Twenty Thousand Leagues
Under the Sea."

What's -- What's the guy's
name in --

-Oh, Captain Nemo.
-Captain Nemo, right.

-Well,
I would be interested to see

how you connect all of this
to "House on Haunted Hill."

-Well, it's directly connected.
-Is it?

-But you just gave away
our title for the night.

-I'm so sorry.
How is it connected?

-Well, when Vincent Price says,

"Come to my house
and spend the night,

and if you last till morning,
I'll give you $10,000,"

then that's basically saying,
"My house is Point Nemo.

This is the end of the world
for you."

-No.

- It's not like that.
- Alright.

"House on Haunted Hill"
is written

and directed
by the great William Castle,

best known for his
gimmick horror flicks.

And the gimmick in this one is
that when the skeleton appears,

an actual skeleton would fly
over the heads

of the audience in the theater,
and it's called Emergo.

He always had a name
for the gimmick,

and Emergo means
a skeleton jumps up out of a box

next to the screen and travels
up to the projection booth

while everybody screams.

In the meantime,
it's a pretty dang good movie

because in jump scare after
jump scare after jump scare

is a group of six strangers
trying to make it
through the night

without becoming part
of the body count.

Sure, we've seen it before,

but have we seen it with a
decapitated head in a suitcase?

I think not.

Let's look at those
Drive-In Totals and get started.

We have two dead bodies,

one dead rat,
acid-bath spa treatments,

random disembodied heads,

falling chandelier,

ceiling blood-dripping,

chain clanking, door creaking,

ghost hovering,
with snaking rope.

Firearm party favors,
monster hand,

ghost organ recital,

gratuitous creepy caretakers,

gratuitous screaming,
heads roll,

gaslighting fu,
skeleton puppet fu.

Drive-In Academy Award
nominations for Carolyn Craig

as the cute-but-dimwitted
ingenue

for going into hysterics
repeatedly,

Richard Long
as the handsome pilot who says,

"I'm going to my room

and if anybody comes in,
I'll shoot him,"

Julie Mitchum as the
alcoholic gossip columnist

who asks the sensible question,
"Who would want to haunt me?,"

Alan Marshal as
the psychiatrist who says,

"Fear makes people
do amazing things,"

Elisha Cook Jr.
as the owner of the house

for being certain
that everyone is going to die

and for saying,
"The ghosts are moving tonight,

restless, hungry,"

Carol Ohmart as the entitled
fourth wife who sneers,

"Darling, the only ghoul
in the house is you,"

Vincent Price
for hating his wife right back

and for doing that creepy thing,

and William Castle,
the producer-director,

for making the audience part
of the movie.

Four stars.
Joe Bob says, "Check it out."

Did you ever watch Vincent Price
before he became a horror guy?

-I have. My kid actually
made me watch "Laura."

-Oh, "Laura." The Otto Preminger
movie. Yeah. Me too.

That movie got
numerous Oscar nominations,

and you would not
even recognize Vincent Price

as the same person.

He's this oily rich kid who's
never had a job in his life,

and he just scams women
for sport.

He must have been
in his 20s maybe.

-Vincent Price was
never in his 20s.

Have you ever seen pictures
of him as a kid?

-I don't think
I ever saw pictures of him.

-He looked 45 when he was 9.

He was, like, born 45
and stayed 45 forever.

-That's kind of true.

And you think of him
as an upper-class Brit,

but he's actually
from St. Louis.

-Maybe that's
why we can never be sure

whether he's a good guy
or a bad guy.

-'Cause he's a shapeshifter.

-It's the stash, man.
-True. The mustache.

Did he ever not wear
the mustache?

-Very rarely.
-In the dictionary,

Vincent Price's picture
is next to the word "sly."

He's always sly.
-And cunning.

-Sly and cunning.

We don't know what you're
up to, Vincent,

but we know it's cunning.
-And sly.

-The ghosts are moving tonight.
Restless, hungry.

May I introduce myself?

I am Watson Pritchard.

In just a minute, I'll show you
the only really haunted house

in the world.

Since it was built
a century ago, seven people,

including my brother,
have been murdered in it.

Since then,
I have owned the house.

I've only spent one night there,

and when they found me
in the morning, I...

I was almost dead.

-I am Frederick Loren,

and I've rented the House
on Haunted Hill tonight

so that my wife
can give a party.

A haunted house party.

She's so amusing.

There'll be food and drink
and ghosts,

and perhaps even a few murders.

You're all invited.

If any of you will spend
the next 12 hours in this house,

I will give you each $10,000.

Or your next-of-kin,
in case you don't survive.

Ah, but here come other guests.

It was my wife's idea

to have our guests
come in funeral cars.

She's so amusing.

Her sense of humor is,
shall we say, original.

I dreamed of the hearse.

It's empty now,
but after a night

in the House of Haunted Hill,
who knows?

This is Lance Schroeder,
a test pilot,

so no doubt a brave man.

But don't you think
you can be much braver

if you're paid for it?

And I happen to know
that Lance needs

the $10,000 I'll give him...

if he is brave enough
to stay all night.

This is Ruth Bridgers.

You've no doubt read her column
in the newspapers.

She says her reason
for coming to the party is

to write a feature article
on ghosts.

She's also desperate for money.
Gambles.

You've already met
Watson Pritchard --

a man living in mortal
fear of a house

and yet he is risking his life
to spend another night here.

I wonder why.

He says it's for money.

This is Dr. David Trent,
a psychiatrist.

He claims that my ghosts
will help his work on hysteria,

but don't you see
a little touch of greed there,

around the mouth and eyes?

This is Nora Manning.

I picked her from the thousands
of people who work for me

because she needed
the $10,000 more than most.

Supports her whole family.

Isn't she pretty?

The party is starting now
and you have until midnight

to find
the House on Haunted Hill.

-Well, where is everybody?

-It isn't a very warm welcome,
is it?

-Only the ghosts in this
house are glad we're here.

-Are we all strangers
to each other?

Don't you two know each other?

-I'm afraid I don't
even know your name.

-I am Nora Manning.
-Lance Schroeder.

-Is Frederick Loren
a friend of yours?

-I've heard of him,
but I've never met him.

-I work in one of his companies,
but I've have never seen him.

-I've never met the man either,
just a phone call.

-Do you know him?
-No.

-Well then, you're the
only one of us who does.

-I don't know him.

All the details about
renting the house

were done by mail.

-He's quite wealthy, isn't he?
-Millions.

-And five wives, I believe.

-Four, I think so far.

-A $50,000 party
for only five people

is a little steep even
for a millionaire.

Well, if I were going
to haunt anybody,

this would most certainly
be the house I'd do it.

-Who closed the door?

-This thing's made
of solid steel.

-Annabelle?

Our guest are here
and fortunately still alive.

Is your face on yet?

-Dust and dirt everywhere.
The water barely trickles.

Couldn't you have had
the place cleaned?
-Atmosphere, darling.

You know how ghosts are,
they never tidy up.

Well, that's
a very fetching outfit,

but hardly suitable for a party.

-I'm not going to the party.

-Mm, "You Spend the Night Ghost
Party" was your idea, remember?

Since it's going to cost me
$50,000, I want you to have fun.

-The party
was
my idea, until
you invited all the guests.

Why all these strangers?
Why none of our friends?

-Friends?
Do we have any friends?

-No. Your jealousy
took care of that.

-I had a reason for
inviting each guest.

I wanted kind of
a cross section,

from psychiatrist to typist,

and from drunk to jet pilot.

They share one thing.
They all need money.

Now let's see if they're
brave enough to earn it.

-And you call this a party?

-Could be.

-Why do you always do that?
It spoils the champagne.

-It might explode.
-Never does.

-Would you guarantee that?

-That isn't funny, Frederick.
-Would make a good headline.

"Playboy kills wife
with champagne cork."

Would you join me?
-No, thank you.

-Just a sip.
Might improve your humor.

-My humor is fine, thanks.

And I haven't poisoned it.

-It's always good to know that.

Have some,
you'll enjoy the party more.

Go on.

-Your trust is so touching.

And I'm not going to the party.

-Of all my wives,
you are the least agreeable.

-But still alive.
-Hm.

Would you go away for
a million dollars in tax-free?

You want it all, don't you?

-I deserve it all.

Your jealousy isn't tax free...

and your possessiveness
is maddening.

-If ever a man had
grounds for divorce.

-But can't prove them.
-The time will come.

You'll slip up
one of these days.

-You think so?

-If I live long enough.

You remember the fun we
had when you poisoned me?

Something you ate,
the doctor said.

-Yes, arsenic on the rocks.

Annabelle...

You'd do it again if you thought
you could get away with it,
wouldn't you?

-Darling, what makes you
think that?

-Something about you.

I hear that hanging is
very uncomfortable,

in case you get any more ideas.

Don't let the ghosts and
the ghouls disturb you, darling.

-Darling, the only ghoul
in the house is you.

-And don't sit up all night,

thinking of ways
to get rid of me.

It makes wrinkles.

-This is what she used on
my brother and her sister.

Hacked them to pieces.

We found parts of their bodies
all over the house.

In places you wouldn't think.

The funny thing is the heads
have never been found.

The hands and feet,
and things like that,

but no heads.

-The wife, probably in a rage,

threatened her husband
with a knife

and then,
carried away by hysteria,

took a swing at him,
and simply went on from there.

-Well, she certainly went on.

How many people did she kill,
Mr. Pritchard?

-Only two. Her husband
and her sister.

No one else was here.
-So there are two loose heads

just floating around in here
somewhere?

-You can hear them at night.

They whisper to each other
and then cry.

-Since our host isn't here,

would anyone care
to mix me a drink?

-Certainly. What will you have?

-Good evening.

I'm your host, Frederick Loren.

Since we're all strangers
to each other,

let's get acquainted
with a drink, shall we?

-Mr. Loren.

I advise you to
call this party off now.

The ghosts are already moving,
and that's a bad sign.

-Let me apologize for my wife.
She will join us later.

What do we have?
-"Scotch and."

-Doctor?
-I'll have the same.

-Now before the party begins,

let's go over the details.

The caretakers will
leave at midnight,

locking us in here until they
come back in the morning.

Once the door is locked,
there is no way out.

The windows have bars that
a jail would be proud of,

and the only door to the outside
locks like a vault.

There is no electricity,

no phone,

no one within miles,

so no way to call for help.

-Like a coffin.

-So, if any of you decide
not to stay for the party

you must let me know
before midnight.

Of course, if you leave,

I shan't be able
to pay you anything.

-I'm interest in your reasons
for this, uh, party.

Besides some pleasant company.

-Ghosts, doctor.

I think everyone wonders
what they would do

if they saw a ghost.

And now my wife is giving us
all the opportunity to find out.

-Amusing.

Ghosts, et cetera, being
only creations of hysteria,

your party should be a success.

-Oh, Pritchard here promises us
genuine ghosts.

-Seven now,

maybe more before morning.

-That's cheerful.

-Four men have been murdered
this house.

And three women.

-You planned your party
very well, Mr. Loren.

Four of us are men,
three are women.

There's a ghost for everybody.

-So, Pritchard,
why don't you take us

on a tour through the house
and let's see what happens, huh?

-See that stain?

Blood.

A young girl was killed here.

And whatever got her
wasn't human.

Don't stand there!
-What do you mean? Where?

-It's too late.
They've marked you.

-Ridiculous.
The roof probably leaks.

-Oh, that must be what it is.
Who would want to haunt me?

-I would say any
self-respecting male ghost.

-I hope it doesn't come back.

-Oh, Mr. Pritchard,
you're the life of the party.

-Oh, he hasn't even started yet.

Wasn't there a man
who threw his wife

into a wine vat or something?

-That was in the cellar.

There's been a murder almost
every place in this house.

All this belonged
to a Mr. Norton,

who didn't die here.

He was electrocuted later.

Mr. Norton did a good deal
of experimenting with wines,

but his wife didn't think
it was any good.

So he filled a vat with acid
and...threw her in.

She was supposed to stay down...

...but the bones came up.

It's a funny thing,

but none of the murders here
were just ordinary,

just shooting or stabbing.

They've all been sort of wild...

violent and different.

-Look out!

-Thank God she didn't fall in.

-You mean
there's still acid in there?

-Destroys everything
with hair and flesh.

Just leaves the bones.

My, it's dry
and dusty down here.

-Well, there's a --
a cure for that.

That stinks. Come on.

-How'd you get
invited to this party?

No.

Let them go on.

I mean, what did he tell you?

Mr. Loren said
everybody would get $10,000.

-But he didn't say anything
about being locked in?

-No.
-Ah.

He just made a deal
with me on the phone.

But nothing about
having to stay.

-Aren't you going to stay?

-If I don't, I lose $10,000.

-I'm going to stay, too.

$10,000.
-Yes.

Do you believe in ghosts?

I don't know.

-Well, I believe
in what that doc says.

You can spook yourself.

I've done it in planes,

seeing things
that aren't really there.

Or
were
they?

What're you gonna do
with your $10,000?

If we get it.

-What do you mean
"if we get it"?

Won't he pay us if we stay?

-Oh, sure he will.

$10,000 is no more to him
than a nickel is to us.

-We were in
a automobile accident.

Now I am the only one in the
family who can make any money.

-Boy, I've never
seen so many doors.

Closet.

Bottles.

-Does it go any where?

Lance!

Lance!

Help me! Please!

Lance is gone!

And there's a ghost!

-See what I mean?
-Please, come on!

-Did you say Lance is gone?
Gone where?

-We'll have to break it down!
It's locked!

-Locked?

-Are you alright?

-Nothing that money won't cure.

I must have...
must have bumped my head.

-The only way you could
bump your head in here...

is to run head-on into the wall.

You didn't do that, did you?

Let's get a bandage on that.

-I wonder why
they didn't kill him.

-Who?

-He didn't bump his head.

They hit him.

-They?

-Well, that's one way to get all
the exposition out of the way,

just have Vincent Price describe
each person in the movie

while their disembodied heads
pop up on the screen.

Uh, William Castle
never wasted time, did he?

But actually,
the writer is Robb White,

who's never talked about when
any of the William Castle films

are screened because Castle was
such a big personality.

But Robb White wrote every one
of Castle's most famous films --

"Macabre," "The Tingler,"
"Homicidal," "13 Ghosts" --

as well as a lot
of "Perry Mason" episodes.

But writing for the screen
wasn't even his main job.

He was a children's
adventure novelist.

He wrote action stories
for young boys,

with titles like "Secret Sea"
and "Flight Deck"

and "Up Periscope"
and "The Survivor"

and "Torpedo Run,"

using his wartime experiences
as a naval officer.

But the single-most famous thing
he wrote was "The Lion's Paw."

"The Lion's Paw" was this kind
of a Huckleberry Finn-type story

set in Florida
about three runaway orphans,

only instead of
the Mississippi River,

they ran away
on the Intracoastal Waterway,

fighting their way
through swamps

and small towns on a sailboat,
trying to find a magic seashell.

Heartwarming story, affirmative,

lots of kids remember it
fondly...

but it's not as famous
as his William Castle films.

But who cares about the writer?

Let's talk about

the va-va-va-voom blonde
bombshell Carol Ohmart,

who plays Vincent Price's
gold-digger fourth wife.

People who watch this movie
for the first time tend to go,

"Wow, who is that
and where did she come from?"

Whenever you read about
beautiful blonde models

in the 1950s,
their bio will always say

"groomed to be
the next Marilyn Monroe."

And in Carol Ohmart's case,
that was true.

Um, she was raised in Seattle
by an abusive single mom.

She started working at age three
in her uncle's vaudeville act.

She lived in many places
in the western states

before starting
her beauty career at age 19,

when she became Miss Utah.

And then she got fourth
runner up for Miss America,

and fourth runner up
was good enough

for a New York modeling career,

some early TV commercials,
Broadway,

and then doing
the floor wax commercials

for a TV show called
"Versatile Varieties,"

which she co-hosted

along with Anne Francis
and Eva Marie Saint.

She finally got
her big chance at the age of 28,

when Paramount was impressed by
her famous bikini photo shoots,

and they signed her and billed
her as "the next Marilyn."

And then they cast her
right away in a movie

called "The Scarlet Hour,"

directed
by the great Michael Curtiz,

famous for "Casablanca,"

"White Christmas,"
"Yankee Doodle Dandy."

Um, and then Paramount assigned
the legendary Edith Head

to do her costumes,

and she had the starring role,

and Nat King Cole was
in the movie.

He sang in a nightclub scene.

The movie was a bomb,
no fault of her own.

The dreary script was written
by Frank Tashlin,

rarely rose above melodrama,

and Carol Ohmart's character
was not at all likable.

So, Paramount gave her
one more chance, though,

in a movie called
"The Wild Party."

Once again,
her character did her no favors.

She played this wealthy
socialite who gets robbed

and kidnapped by Anthony Quinn
and a pack of lowlifes.

Despite a $2 million
publicity campaign

to make her a superstar,
she had two flops in a row,

and that made everybody forget
the bathing suit photos.

Mainly because
they didn't really --

they didn't really sex her up
in the roles that they gave her.

She came across
as conniving and sarcastic,

just the way
she is in this movie,

but it's highly appropriate
in this movie.

So after Paramount
wrote her off,

she ended up guesting on a lot
of TV series where she was --

she was the hot girl
on "Perry Mason,"

she was the hot girl
on "Route 66,"

she was the hot girl on
"Mannix," "Hawaiian Eye,"

and of course, this movie,

which turned out to be what
most people remember her for,

along with
Jack Hill's "Spider Baby."

And then she retired
at the age of 47.

She was addicted to meds

that she'd probably
been taking for years

in order to
keep her weight down,

but she got clean
and then she never looked back.

She devoted herself to a quiet
life of painting and gardening

and writing poetry in Colorado,

where she died in 2002
at age 74.

Anyway, I love the scene

where Vincent Price
and Carol Ohmart

talk about killing each other,

but they do it in
that delightful way

that rich, witty people
discuss horrible things.

It's probably
the best-written dialogue scene

in the whole flick.

Back to the movie.

Hollywood just chewed her up
and spit her out, Darcy.

-Sounds like it.

-The one thing a contract player
could not influence

was the script.

You know, you get
the right script, you're a star.

You get the wrong script,
you're the hot girl on "Mannix."

-I mean, is that a bad thing,
though?

-No, being the hot girl on
"Mannix" is a wonderful thing.

-I would love
to be the hot girl on "Mannix."

-Darcy,
I
would love
to be the hot girl on "Mannix."

-All of that.

-Nora, when you came in, you
said something about a ghost.

-There was something.
-What did it look like?

-Well, it was wearing
a black thing

that went all the way
to the floor.

-Weren't you a little
frightened at the time?

-Oh, well, yes.

-That, Mr. Loren, is hysteria.

-Well, then, doctor, how do you
explain what happened to Lance?

Was that hysteria too?

-You better get that
checked in a day or so.

-Thanks, doc.

-Wait for me in the hall.

-The ghosts are
coming closer, Mr. Loren.

-You really believe
in your pet ghosts,

don't you, Pritchard?

-Before the night's over,
you will too.

-Would you like a drink, Lance?
-No, thanks.

-I'd like one. Scotch and.

Mr. Loren, are you really
going to pay anyone
who stays all night?

-Certainly. $10,000.

-Will there be much
red tape or...delay?

-In a hurry, dear?
-Frankly, yes.

Or frantically.

-Here you are, my dear.

-Someone or something was in
here when I came in, but where?

And if the door was locked,
how did it get out?

What you saw might
have been a ghost, Nora,

but what was in here
with me was no ghost.

-I don't know.
I was so scared.

-That sound different to you?

-Yes.

3, 6, 9, 12.

12 feet.

Three, six...

Now I'm going to knock
on the other wall.

When you hear me,
you knock on this wall.

Tap lower down!

Oh, Lance! I saw it again!

-Where did it come from?
-From in here.

-But if it ran out of here,
I'd have seen it.

-Lance, it doesn't run,
it just floats.

-Yeah, but why didn't I see it?

-You don't believe me!

How can I?

-I'm Annabelle Loren.

You must be Miss Manning.

I realize this is a very unusual
and a very, very dull party.

Wouldn't you like to freshen up?

This is your room.

Depressing, isn't it?

-I doubt if I'll spend
much time here.

-It's going to rain.

The perfect atmosphere
for my husband's party.

Why did you come here?

-He said he'd give me
$10,000.

-Why did he pick you?
-I don't know.

My supervisor just came
and said I've been invited.

-How long have you
known my husband?

-I just met him tonight.

-So...

...why you?

What were you doing,
wandering around by yourself?

-Well, I was in the cellar
with Lance.

Mr. Schroeder.

I just left, that's all.

-Don't do it again.

Don't go anywhere in this house
by yourself.

Now, fix you face and I'll come
by for you in a few minutes.

-But I...

-You're in danger.

We all are.

-But who?

-I hope for your sake
you'll never find out.

I'm Annabelle Loren.
Are you looking for something?

-Not exactly.
-Are you the doctor?

-No. No, I'm Lance Schroeder.

-The pilot.
You've hurt yourself?

-Oh, it's just a bump
on the head.

Which is my room?
-I believe this is it.

-Thank you, Mrs. Loren.

-Annabelle, Lance.

You were with the young girl
in the cellar.

Why was she so upset?
-Was she?

-And you don't look like
the type

to go around bumping his head.

What did it really happened,
Lance?

-Well, Nora thought
she saw a ghost,

but I didn't see anything.

-She was just frightened then?

-And mad at me I think.
I kidded her about it.

-I wouldn't joke about anything
else that happens here tonight.

-Now, don't tell me that you're
taking all this seriously.

-Aren't you?

-Well, I'd like to
find out what hit me.

-Lance...

...if I need help,
may I count on you?

-Yeah, sure, I guess so.

Look, what's going on here
anyway?

I mean, what is with
this party business?

-This is no party.
He is planning something.

-Your husband?
-I wish I knew what it was.

-Must be pretty big if he is
going to lay out $50,000.

-The money doesn't mean
anything.

He has a reason
for getting us all up here

to this dreadful old house.

-Well, what for?
He doesn't even knows us.

-Maybe that's exactly
why you're here.

-Well, what can he get away
with?

-Oh, he thinks that big money
like his

can get away with anything.

You know of course
that I'm his
fourth
wife.

The first simply disappeared.

The other two died.

Lance,

I don't want to join them.

-You mean he, uh...?

-All his doctors said
they died of heart attacks.

Two girls...in their 20s.

-Well, what can he do?

-My husband is sometimes
insane with jealousy.

Nothing matters to him then.

Please be careful.

-Would he hurt you?

-He would kill me if he could.

-This is that part of the movie
where Vincent Price says,

"It's close to midnight."

It's hard to even say
those words without singing --

without singing them, right?
-Yep.

-♪ It's close to midnight ♪

'Cause -- 'Cause they would
become the first words

of the most successful
music video in the history

of the world,
Michael Jackson's
"Thriller."

And when this movie came out,
Michael Jackson --

Michael Jackson
would have been six months old

when the movie came out,

indicating that he
must have watched it later

as a kid growing up
in Gary, Indiana,

on one of the late-night
Chicago horror shows,

possibly
the original Svengoolie.

He could have watched that show.

Anyway, Michael Jackson
was the world's

biggest Vincent Price fan,

as evidenced by Price doing
the zombie cemetery voiceover

on
"Thriller"
right
before the ghouls start dancing.

And when you see
this movie today,

it seems natural that
William Castle would hook up

with Vincent Price,
but actually it happened --

it was a total accident
that it happened.

William Castle was, of course,

one of the greatest marketers
of all time.

He had worked for
Hollywood Studios for 15 years.

He had already directed
41 movies

by the time "House
on Haunted Hill" came out.

He started out
as a theater director

in his hometown
of New York City,

back when there were dozens of
theaters changing shows weekly

and where it was really hard
to get noticed

if you had a lackluster play
on your hands.

And often he would be hired
by producers

who knew that if you had
no stars and a mediocre book,

Castle might get the company

into the black
with his ballyhoo.

And his biggest publicity
triumph came with a German play.

Castle was German.

His birth name was
William Schloss.

Schloss is the German word
for castle,

and so he sometimes directed
plays in the German language.

So, in 1939 he directed
"Das ist nicht fur Kinder,"

which translates
"This Is Not For Children,"

um, starring a beautiful young
dancer named Ellen Schwanneke,

who had starred in a famous
1931 German movie

about girls at a boarding school

trying to figure out
their lesbian feelings.

And Castle pretended to be
a famous German director

fleeing Hitler,

and shortly after
the play's premiere,

Ellen Schwanneke received
a telegram from Hitler

inviting her to perform
in Berlin.

She said no to Hitler,

and Castle made up this story
about how outraged Hitler was,

and he started billing her as

"the girl who said no
to Hitler,"

and the play was a success,

even though the play is
so unmemorable

that no copies of the play
have been preserved.

But the stunt got
Castle noticed by Harry Cohn,

the head of Columbia Pictures,

and Castle's
film career was launched.

Oddly enough,
once he got to Hollywood,

Columbia consistently rejected
all his ideas for promotion.

He was just
a hired-gun director --

no control over script,
casting, editing,

marketing or anything
except designing the shots.

'Cause this was in the days
when directors

were just expected to do
what they were told.

And Castle was
a great studio director.

Time and again he delivered more
than what his material deserved.

If you want to take
a little film-nerd journey,

watch the William Castle films
of the 1940s and '50s.

You will discover that his
style...is no style at all.

I mean, he made everything.

"The Whistler" is
an early film noir based

on the popular radio series.

It would lead to seven sequels.

"When Strangers Marry"
is a tight little thriller

starring Kim Hunter as a woman

who has a whirlwind romance

with the traveling salesman
Dean Jagger,

marries him, only to discover
he just might be a murderer,

and that sets off
an amateur investigation

with her old friend
Robert Mitchum.

Um, "Hollywood Story" is
a thinly disguised treatment

of the real-life murder

of silent-film director
William Desmond Taylor,

which was never solved.

"Slaves of Babylon"
is a biblical epic

about the prophet Daniel

freeing the Israelites
from King Nebuchadnezzar.

Um, "The Fat Man" with
Julie London and Rock Hudson

is a private eye film set
in the circus world.

"It's a Small World"
is a heartwarming tale

of a dwarf tempted
to join organized crime.

"Undertow" is about a man
on the run from the Chicago mob,

who hides out in the apartment
of a woman that he just met.

He made at least eight westerns,

including
"The Conquest of Cochise,"

"The Law vs. Billy the Kid,"
three westerns in 3-D,

including a great one called,
uh, "Fort Ti,"

uh, plus "Jesse James
vs. the Daltons."

That was a good one.
The list goes on and on.

Castle was averaging three
or four movies a year

in addition
to shooting TV series,

but his shooting style was
just straightforward --

get the job done, no frills.

And after he turned in the film,

Harry Cohn had no interest
in listening to his ideas

about how to sell the film.

And then, fortunately for us,

William Castle got
sick of working for the man,

and he mortgaged his house

in order to form his
own production company.

The result was a movie
called "Macabre,"

psychological thriller in 1958

that Castle barnstormed
across America with.

He would park hearses
outside the theaters

where it was playing,

and he would rise up
out of a coffin at the premiere.

Um, he stationed nurses
at every screening.

Uh, he ensured
every insured member for $1,000

in case of death from fright.

Um, and that promotion worked,
and Allied Artists --

which most people still remember

as the old Poverty Row studio
Monogram --

Allied Artists earned $5 million
on an investment of $125,000,

and $125,000 was $35,000 more

than Castle actually spent
making the movie.

And so, with his reputation
firmly established

as a master of showmanship,

he ran into Vincent Price
in a coffee shop...

and the world got better
for everybody,

but especially for
William Castle.

And I'll tell that story
at the next break,

but right now,
let's get back to the movie.

So...roll it.

You know, one thing
that bugs me, though...

...the inside
of this haunted house

doesn't really match
the outside.

-I know, right?

The outside's ultra modern, and
the inside is kind of Victorian.

-The exterior is
actually the Ennis Brown House

in the Los Feliz neighborhood
of LA,

and it's made out
of 27,000 concrete blocks,

and it's been used
in more than 80 movies.

You see it when all the guests
are arriving in the hearses

in the opening scenes.

-So, the Haunted Hill is
famous,

and the House on Haunted Hill
is famous.

-Yeah, it's like right there
by The Greek Theatre. The, um...

Ron Burkle, the billionaire,
he used to own it,

but now it's owned by some,
uh, cannabis billionaires.

-What? Really? Who?
I might know 'em.

I'm just saying. Maybe.

-Uh, Robert and Cindy Rosenheck.

Uh, they paid $18 million
for the house in 2019,

uh, out of their CBD
beauty line empire.

That was the most ever paid for
a Frank Lloyd Wright house.

-Wow.
-They bought the "House
on Haunted Hill" house

by selling body lotion
made from weed.

How weird is that?
You probably use it.

-It's possible.
-It's the Lord Jones brand

of weed body lotion.
-Oh, okay.

It's not what
I was thinking of then.

-Do you use cannabis cosmetics?

-I'm not opposed to it.
-Whenever we discuss weed,

I feel like you have
all kinds of arcane knowledge

that nobody else has.

That's why I ask --
I ask you these questions.

If you say so, sir.

-Annabelle,
you're missing all the fun.

Nora Manning was almost
killed by a falling chandelier.

The pilot bashed his head in.

-Is he badly hurt?

-The saturnine psychiatrist
bandaged him up.

Don't you want to go
and console him?

As you do with most men...
in your fashion.

-You are so clever, Frederick.

-Yes, I lie awake at nights,
wondering why I married you.

It was rather a mistake.

-You didn't marry me, dear.
I
married
you.

Unpleasant, but no mistake.

-Hurry up.

-Frederick, for last time,
I'm not going to your party.

-And for last time,
it's not my party, but yours.

And you
are
going.

-I am not.
-You ready, dear?

-No.
-Are you ready, dear?

-Yes, damn you.

-Would you adore me
as much if I were poor?

No, all you want
to be is a lovely widow.

It's almost time to
lock up the house.

Then your party
will really begin.

And I wonder how it will end.

It's close to midnight, Lance.

-Okay, I'll be down in a minute.

-Who is it?
-Your host, my dear.

It's almost midnight, Nora.

We're all going to get together
down in the living room.

-Alright, Mr. Loren,
I'll be right down.

-Come with us.

Come with us
before he kills you.

-Where is Nora? Miss Manning?

-I don't want to stay here!

-Nora, what happened?

That's Jonas Slydes
and his wife.

They have been caretakers
here for years.

She's blind, you know?

-I'm not going to stay here!

-Well, doctor, it looks like

we have a real case of hysteria
on our hands.

-Oh, I thinks she's just a
little upset, not hysterical.

-Good evening.

-Hello, my dear.

This is my wife.
These are our guests.

Ruth Bridgers.

Dr. Trent.

You know Watson Pritchard,
of course.

Nora Manning, and, uh,
this is Lance Schroeder.

-Get me out of here.

-Now what about the $10,000?

-I don't care.
He wants to kill me.

-Who wants to kill you?

-Mr. Loren.

-May I have your attention,
please?

I think you all remember
the bargain we made

about staying all night --
$10,000 apiece.

If any of you don't survive,

$50,000 will be divided
amongst the rest of you.

If
I
should die...

...you will be paid
by my estate.

When the door is locked from
the outside by the caretakers,

we'll all be forced to stay
in this house until morning.

If any of you decide
not to stay,

you must leave with
the caretakers now.

You won't have a chance
to change your minds later...

because there'll be
no way to get out.

-I don't want to stay!
-Wait.

-It isn't midnight yet.
Who told them they could leave?

-They never leave
before midnight.

-Well, they've gone now.

I was going to ask you whether
you wanted to stay or not,

but it seems that the caretakers
have made the decision for you.

We're all locked in now.

-But I don't want to stay.

-I sorry my dear,
but it's too late now.

-Darling, haven't you had
enough of this silly game?

Get some cars up here for these
people and let them go home.

But pay them first.

-This is
your
party, remember?

In spite of my wife's faith in
my ability to do the impossible,

we will all have to
stay in this house

until 8:00 in the morning.

But we have some
party favors for you

in these little coffins.

This is my wife's idea,

and I must say
I think it's rather dangerous.

I suppose you all know how
to use one of this things,

but in case you don't...

you just press down
on this lever with your thumb

and then pull the trigger.

You see? They're loaded.

-These are no good against
the dead, only the living.

-Doctor.

Lance.

Nora.

-Go ahead, take it.

-Miss Bridgers.

And here is yours, dear.
-I don't need it.

-It was your idea.

Who knows, you may
want to use it on me

before this night is over.

-Throw these guns away.
They won't do you any good.

-I agree with Pritchard
on that point,

although not
for the same reason.

-Dr. Trent...

...don't you approve of
our little party favors?

-Suppose Nora had had
a gun when she mistook

the blind woman for a ghost.

-I don't think anyone else
is going to

walk around in total darkness.

-Oh, I'm sure we're not gonna go
running round the house

shooting each other, aren't you?

-Who knows? Fear makes
people do amazing things.

-Mr. Pritchard,
you said your sister-in-law

killed a man and woman here
and cut them up.

You said they found hands
and feet,

but they never found any heads.

Would you like to see
one of those heads?

Would you all like to
see one of those heads?!

Well, then just follow me!

-Darling, I really
don't need this.

-Pistols as party favors
in little coffins.

What a great idea!
Let's arm the entire cast.

Everybody except the one

who seems most likely
to be homicidal,

Annabelle.

So, the story
I mentioned at the last break

is that after "Macabre"
was a big hit,

there was a lot
of pressure on William Castle

and his screenwriter,
Robb White,

to come up
with a follow-up movie.

They started developing
"House on Haunted Hill,"

and Castle happened to see
Vincent Price dining alone

in a coffee shop,
and he didn't know him,

but he strode over to his table

and he told him
he wanted to hire him,

and Price was amused by that
and asked him to sit down,

and it turns out that Price was
somewhat depressed.

He had been cast
as the chief villain

in a big-budget western
starring Jimmy Stewart,

but Jimmy Stewart
had gotten sick,

and he had to be replaced
at the last minute by Alan Ladd.

Remember how tall Vincent Price
is in those 1940s melodramas,

Darcy?
-Yeah, he, like,

towers over everybody else.

But I think they used
his height in "Laura"

to make him seem
kind of clownish.

-So, Alan Ladd was famous

as the shortest movie star
in Hollywood.

And so the studio said,

"We can't have the two of you
in scenes together,"

and Price lost the part
to somebody shorter.

So, um, now can I digress
for a moment about that?

-We live for your digressions.
Please.

-Don't be sarcastic. Alright.

I was in this scene one time
with a very famous actor

who I won't name
because I don't want to,

you know, cause anything...
-Name him!

...but I was a
very minor character,

he was the star of the movie,

and the cinematographer said,
"We need to position them

so that Joe Bob
doesn't dominate the shot."

And this particular
movie star said,

"Just give me an Alan Ladd."

And I didn't know what he meant.

But the term Alan Ladd
was used to mean an apple box.

Apparently, Alan Ladd
was shot standing on apple boxes

for much of his career,
to the point

that his name became
shorthand for the box itself.

Anyway, Vincent Price
often had to act, I guess,

opposite people standing
on apple boxes.

So Vincent Price was
drowning his sorrows

over losing the part

and there weren't
enough apple boxes

to make Alan Ladd
as tall as Price.

And Castle commiserated
with him,

and then at some point
in their conversation,

Castle pitched him on the plot
of "House on Haunted Hill,"

and Vincent Price loved
the synopsis,

and he agreed
to do the movie on the spot.

But Allied Artists
didn't just want another movie,

they wanted another gimmick.

And the one
William Castle came up with is

the most complicated one
that he ever tried.

At a certain point in the movie,

a black box next to the screen
would pop open

and a 12-foot skeleton would
light up, jump out of the box,

and fly over the heads
of the audience

all the way to
the projection booth,

and Castle advertised this as

"the first film with
the amazing new wonder Emergo --

the thrills fly right
off the screen."

And it took a while
to get it to work,

'cause at the first screening,

the skeleton dangled
for a few seconds

and then bounced right back
into the box.

At the second screening,
the skeleton flew halfway up

and then fell on top
of the audience,

where kids threw it back up
into the air.

But when they finally
did get it working,

it became a sensation

that did just what
Castle hoped it would do --

it made people talk about it.

And the word of mouth
was so good, in fact,

that the movie earned $5 million
on an investment of $200,000,

and that established Castle
as the gimmick king.

Unfortunately,
kids started bringing
slingshots to the theaters

and wait for a chance
to knock the skeleton down,

and the theater owners
eventually became annoyed

by the whole expense

and the trouble
of messing with the skeleton,

so most of the skeleton rigs
were just thrown away as junk.

Which is why today
serious memorabilia collectors

will pay up to $75,000

for a single "House
on Haunted Hill" skeleton,

and even more
if it comes with a full rig

that allows it to be pulled
on a wire

over the heads of the audience.

But anyway, the --

-Whoa.
-Okay.

Of course, in --
Of course, in 1959,

they couldn't achieve
the supreme effect

of our own
in-house flying skeleton.

Can you try that again, Shane?

It's --
-Oh!

-Oh!
-So scary!

-I don't think this is the --

Are you scared?
-I'm so scared.

-Back -- Back to the movie.
-Whoa!

-How many movies were made
with Emergo?

One?

-I guess once you've seen
a flying skeleton,

you've seen
a flying skeleton.

-Ooh, a flying skeleton.

- Okay.
- Oh, no!

-O-Okay, Shane.

We get it. We get it.
-Stop saying "Shane."

-What do you mean? Shane Morton,
our special effects guy.

-It is not a special effect.

That is an actual
flying skeleton spirit. Look.

-Oh, okay.
-Whoo!

-Shane, put your undead
aeronautically engineered
skeleton back in his cage.

Okay?

-Aw.

-Just go look in my suitcase.

Just go look.

But it was in there!
A woman's head!

-Nora, I think
you're a little upset.

Would you care for a sedative?

-Get out! Get out, all of you!

All of you, get out of here
and leave me alone!

Just get out of here!

-You think it's alright to
leave her by herself, doctor?

-I wished she'd taken
the sedative.

-Well, what do you suppose
she thought she saw?

-They're closing in on her.

-Look, doc, I think somebody
ought to stay with her.

-There could be a million
people around her.

If they wanted her,
they'd get her.

-What if he's right?

-He's too drunk to know
what he's talking about.

-I wonder.

I'll join you in a minute.

-Do you think
it would do any good

if you went in
and talked to her?

-Well, do you think there really
was a head in her suitcase?

-I don't know.

-A thing like that would
put me right over the edge.

-Well, could you
sort of stay up here,

I mean, in case she needs help?

-Alright. I'll be in my room.

Just call if you need.

-Thanks.

-Are you sure there are only
seven people in this house?

-Positive,
except for the ghosts.

-I don't believe in ghosts,
nor in frightening women.

In Nora's case,
it's gone far enough.

Perhaps too far.

-What do you suggest
we do about it, doctor?

-Don't frighten her any more!

-Nora?

Nora?

Nora?

Nora!

What do you know about this?

-They've taken her. In a little
while she'll be one of them.

-Where is N--

Where is she?

-It's too late. It's too late.

You'll never find her again.

-Pritchard, if you
know where she is,
you'd better tell me now!

-She's gone!
She's gone with them!

And there's nothing
you can do about it.

-Nora.

-Take her down!

-Nora?

-She is dead, Mr. Loren.

Your wife hanged herself.

-Suicide.

- Lance!
- Nora!

-Lance, hide me.
Please hide me.

-What's the matter?
-Hide me!

He tried to kill me.

He grabbed me and choked me
and put me in that room.

And then he went away
and left me.

-Who?

-He thought I was dead.

-Who?

-Mr. Loren.

-Are you sure about this?

-I don't know. It -- It was
dark, but it must have been him.

-Has anybody seen you
since he left you?

-I heard some people
in that room,

but I went by
and nobody saw me.

-Mrs. Loren is dead.

-But how?

-Loren said
she committed suicide.

But I think
somebody killed her.

-Him?

-I'm sure you've come
to the same conclusion I have.

-Yeah. I think so.

-Let's all have a meeting
and discuss what to do.

The living room?
-Okay. In a minute.

I've got to go downstairs.

Now you lock yourself in here

and don't let anybody know
you're here.

If he thinks you're dead
he won't come here.

And I'll get back
as soon as I can.

You'll be alright.

And if you have to...

you use it.

-So beautiful.

So greedy.

So cold.

What are you doing in here?
-Wait, don't we...?

-What do you mean
coming in here?

-I don't want them
to take her away.

-You're drunk.
-They will
if you don't watch her.

-You're drunk!
Alright, out with it, Pritchard!

Why did you come into this room?

-I'm the only one
who understands.

Understands what?!

Your wife isn't there anymore.
She's already joined them.

-Now, Pritchard, I've had
enough of your spook talk.

Get out, you sot, and don't come
back into this room again!

-One thing that always amuses me
about this film

is how Frederick is
constantly annoyed by Pritchard.

And the interplay
between, um, Vincent Price --

Shane, stop!

Shane.
-Oh, no!

-Shane, I know you worked hard
on this flying skeleton,

but once you've seen it,
it's really not scary anymore.

-But he's so cute.
-Yes, skeletons are cute.

It's one of the problems
with Halloween

and one of the problems
with the older horror films.

We just don't react
to skeletons anymore.

I react.

-Yes. You think they're cute.
I get that.

Anyway, the interplay
between Vincent Price

and Elisha Cook Jr.
is priceless.

Elisha Cook is the owner
of the house,

but also the old coot who warns
you not to go into the house

and somehow he sells that.

I think throughout the film
we're all thinking,

"Listen to Elisha. He's crazy,
but he's seen things."

One of the most famous
character actors of all time.

60-year film career.

Always quirky.

His picture is next to the word
"eccentric" in the dictionary.

He was the guy you called

if you needed a neurotic
or a high-strung character

or a hophead, a drunk,
a pimp, weak-kneed gangster,

and he's done so many hundreds
of iconic scenes

that it's hard
to single anything out.

Um, the one I remember is
his drum solo in "Phantom Lady."

He's a jazz drummer.
He's high on something.

He's staring at Ella Raines
in a nightclub

as he does
this frenzied drum solo

that pretty much amounts
to an orgasm.

But he also has this great scene

where he gets
gunned down in the street

by Jack Palance in "Shane."

Um, he may be best known for
playing the cheap crook Wilmer

in "The Maltese Falcon."

He was in a lot of film noirs,
including the original one,

uh, "Strangers
on the Third Floor."

He was especially memorable
in TV westerns.

He did a lot of those --
"Rawhide,"

"Wagon Train,"
"Gunsmoke," "Bonanza."

But he was so famous
within the industry

and so needed

that directors would send people
to track him down

after he dropped out
of Hollywood

and started living like a hermit
in the high mountains

near Bishop, California,
middle of nowhere.

And he was still
getting tracked down

and cast in stuff well
into his 70s and 80s.

Had great performances in, um,
"Electra Glide in Blue"

and "Carny"
and, uh, "Blacula" and, uh,

as the character Icepick in many
episodes of "Magnum, P.I."

Anyway, he does a great job
in this movie

of being the wild-card character
who might just be a drunk,

or might be a psychic,
or might be a killer,

but his main job is
to get on Vincent Price's nerves

every chance he can.

Alright,
let's get back to the movie.

Roll it.

You ever been to Bishop,
California?

-Um, I don't think
I've had the pleasure.

-It's not quite as bleak
as Pioneertown.

It's definitely one of those
dusty, redneck California towns

that seem to have
been transplanted from Oklahoma.

-Let's go.
-Mule capital of the world,

Darcy.
-I love mules.

-You do not love mules.
-I love mules.

-But, yeah, we should.

But we could go to
Bishop Mule Days,

where they celebrate the history
and dignity of the mule.

-Alright. When is that?

-Well,
we'd have to wait till May.

But if you want
a great mule show...

-And who doesn't?

-Black Ruby once raced there
at Mule Days.

Black Ruby, fastest mule
who ever lived.

Girl mules are frequently faster
than boy mules, so...

Of course they are.

-I could see
Elijah Cook owning a mule.

-I like to think he did.

-Where is what's her name?

Nora?

-I didn't disturb her since I
don't think this concerns her.

-No, you're right.

-Mr. Loren, isn't there some way

we can get out
of this house now?

-No. None at all.

-We could try breaking out.

-The only door to the outside
is made of steel.

The bars at the windows
are set in solid stone.

We gotta stay.

-I'm not afraid of
your ghosts, Pritchard.

-But I
am
afraid.

When we came here
a few hours ago,

the only thing we had in common
was the $10,000 we'd get.

Now, however,
we share something else --

the death of Mrs. Loren.

So far tonight...

one of us was almost killed
by a falling chandelier...

...one of us
was mysteriously slugged...

one of us is being driven to the
brink of absolute hysteria...

...and one of us is dead.

Were these accidents?
Suicide?

And we must stay here
for six more hours?

-Six hours?

Six of us.

Time enough.

-Who will be next?

How will it happen?

-Let me ask you a question,
doctor.

You were the first one
to see my wife dead.

Did you also see anything that
she could have climbed up on

and then jumped?
-No.

-Did any of you?

There was nothing.

How then did she get up there

so high?
-Exactly, Mr. Loren, how?

She couldn't have
pulled herself up there.

She couldn't have
dropped from the ceiling.

Do you think
your wife killed herself?

-No.

She was murdered.

By one of you.

-Or
you,
Mr. Loren.

To deliberately kill someone,
you must have a reason.

-We were all strangers
to your wife.

Only you had a motive
for murder.

-What husband hasn't at some
time wanted to kill his wife?

What husband hasn't had
a thousand opportunities

to do it in such a way so
that he'd never be suspected?

I'm not such a fool
as to hang my wife

from a ceiling by a rope.

-The fact remains that you

or one of us
murdered Mrs. Loren.

And that's a matter
for the police.

-So, how do we
get the police?

-That's my point.
We can't until morning.

What began as a silly party
given by an eccentric

has now involved us all
in murder.

-For once,
Pritchard may be right.

If another murder is in
the works, let's stop it now.

-Another
murder?
-Why not?

Maybe one of us saw much.

-Why should even a millionaire
want to give each of us $10,000

to spend one night in
a gloomy old house?

To see some ghosts?
To have a party?

No.
-Have you finished trying me,
doctor?

And is the verdict
guilty of murder?

-Oh, this isn't getting us
anywhere.

Somebody killed
Mrs. Loren, we know that.

One of us is guilty and the
rest of us are innocent. Okay.

Now, what we have to do
for the next six hours

is to protect ourselves...
from each other.

-Do you really think...?
-I don't think anything.

I just know
that I'm going to my room,

and if anybody comes in,
I'll shoot him...or her.

-And if we all stay in
our rooms, we'll be safe.

Because the innocent will have
no reason to leave his room,

and the guilty will admit
his guilt if he or she does.

-And we all have guns.
-Then we are all agreed?

-Oh, I wish this night
were over.

-Rooms? Guns?

I tell you it doesn't
make any difference.

They are through with us yet.

What's the use
in saying good night?

-Good night.

-Good night, doctor.

-Nora, it's me, Lance.

Are you okay?

They've all gone to their rooms
and locked themselves in.

-Lance, I've been thinking.

It was so dark there.
Maybe it wasn't Mr. Loren.

-It was him, alright.

He tried to kill you,
and he
did
kill his wife.

-How can you be so sure?
-She tried to warn me,

asked me to help her.

The doc thinks he is going
to try and kill one of us.

Now there must be a way out
of this place and I'm going

to find it and get the police
before he does.

-I'm going with you.

-But if he finds out
you're alive...

No, Nora, you're safer
here than any place else.

Now just lock yourself
in and keep quiet.

If I find a way out,
I'll come back and get you.

-No.

No. No!

No.

No!

Lance!

-What do you think
of Nora's screaming abilities?

-Oh, she's amazing.

-There's
a certain kind of scream

that women did in the '50s.

I think they copied it
from one another.

But Carolyn Craig,
she's better than the rest.

She knows how to belt them out.

If she wasn't a good screamer,

they would have dubbed
her screams.

But, uh, because

William Castle
did know how to do that.

When it's a screaming male,
of course,

they often use
the Wilhelm Scream.

We've talked about that before.
The Wilhelm --

the Wilhelm Scream is legendary
in sound design history.

-Is that a "Trivial Pursuit"
category?

Yeah.

Sound design history is
the ultimate nerd category.

No, it started
in a Gary Cooper movie

called "Distant Drums" 1951.

This guy gets bitten
by an alligator

in a Florida swamp
and he screams.

And the actual scream
was recorded in the studio

by Sheb Wooley,
who would later become

immortal for his 1958

sound design novelty song
"Purple People Eater."

But in 1951, he was a grunt in
the Warner Brothers ADR studio.

ADR stands for
additional dialogue recording.

Um, and they call it
the Wilhelm Scream

because it was such
a good scream

that they used it again
two years later in the Western,

"The Charge at Feather River,"

in a scene where a character
named Private Wilhelm

gets shot with an arrow.

It has since been used in more
than 400 movies and TV shows.

Uh, anyway, enterprising
sound designers have always

been searching for the female
Wilhelm Scream, to no avail.

There's a scream called
the Howie Scream female variant,

which is a version of
the scream emitted by Howie Long

when he fell from a train
in the 1996 film "Broken Arrow."

And there's one
in the BBC library

that's just labeled
blood curdling scream.

That is female.

Nobody knows
where that one came from,

but I think the owners of
"The Texas Chain Saw Massacre"

should license Marilyn Burns'
screams.

-Yeah, but Nora didn't
need that.

-Right.
She's a true scream queen.

She's not a cheater.

But most actresses
in the '50s cheated.

-How do you know that?

-You can tell the scream
doesn't match their face.

-Well, that's not their fault.

The director probably dubbed it
after they were gone.

-Exactly.

And I think female screams
are harder to do also

because they have
a greater range.

And so the context matters
a lot.

Carolyn Craig,
who played Nora, had a sad life.

She started a career as a model.

In 1955, she made a famous
series of photographs showing

the health benefits
of being a housewife.

Like, how using a mop tones
your arm muscles.

And then she broke into movies
in a very small role

as the daughter
of Elizabeth Taylor in "Giant."

Um, she had one major lead
in a crime drama called

"Portland Exposé" in 1957.

She kept playing
teenagers well into her '20s.

She got a part
on "General Hospital."

She married
a Buick dealer in L.A.

and stayed married
for six years,

and then went into
a deep depression

after her divorce in 1970,

and she killed herself
with a handgun at the age of 36.

But while we're speaking
of females in this movie,

I shouldn't pass up, Ruth,
the money hungry,

alcoholic newspaper columnist.

That's Julie Mitchum,
the older sister

of Robert Mitchum,
who was --

She was a nightclub singer,
rarely seen on screen.

In fact, this was her last role.

But that character is
so underwritten it seems

like an afterthought
to kind of fill out the runtime.

I should also mention
Richard Long,

who plays Lance,
known as one

of the best looking actors
in Hollywood

and married to one of
the hottest women in Hollywood,

Mara Corday,
who was known as,

"The most photographed model
in the world"

and became Playboy Playmate
of the Month for October 1958,

which was the issue
that came out

while they were filming
this movie.

Um, she was a showgirl.
She also starred in "Tarantula."

She would go on to be
in four Clint Eastwood films.

She had a tumultuous
relationship with Long,

but they stayed married
for 17 years until he also --

he also died early.
He had a heart attack at age 47.

Best known for TV roles,
"The Big Valley,"

he was in "Nanny
and the Professor."

He was in the movie
"Follow the Boys" in 1963,

opposite Connie Francis
and Paula Prentiss.

Okay, we now approach
the strange conclusion

of "House on Haunted Hill,"
but more importantly,

the scene where the lighted
skeleton jumps out of the box

and terrorizes the audience.

So, roll the film.

-Shane, not funny.

Shane, funny.

-This is why theater owners
eventually

destroyed the skeletons.

-It is irresistible.
-What's irresistible?

-Making the skeleton fall
on someone like that.

-I -- I don't get the joke.

-Ha!
Welcome to our world, man.

Ha-ha!

-An admission of guilt, doctor?

-Certainly not.

There's either
somebody else in this house

or one of us has left his room.

Did you hear anything?

-Organ music?
-That and someone walking.

-You got yours?

Ready?

-You look downstairs
and I'll look up here.

-Why not together?

We maybe only minutes,
seconds left to someone's life.

Why waste time?

-It's almost over, darling.

Every detail was perfect.

-What's happening?
-We've done it.

The perfect crime.
Beautiful.

-Has she killed him?

Not yet.

But she will.

-Get me out of this hanging
harness.

What's taking that girl so long?
What time is it?

-At first I couldn't
get Nora to want to protect

herself with a gun.

But after you appeared
at the window

everything began to work
just as we had planned.

You were wonderful.

Just the touch
which finally drove her

into complete hysteria.

-It will be worth all of
our planning, darling.

Where is Nora now?

What's happening?
-On her way to the cellar.

So scared, she'll shoot the
first thing that moves.

-And Frederick?
-On his way to the cellar, too.

-David, are you sure none
of them will suspect us?

-Of what?

An hysterical girl
accidentally shoot somebody?

Who would suspect that
we planned it that way?

That we drove her to it.
-What about my suicide?

-For just a ghost party gag.

We'll claim it was a dummy
since I'm the only one

who touched you.

-And the caretakers?

-Well, they had no idea what
they were really doing.

-What about Nora?
She's not stupid, you know?

-Darling, believe me. Everything
we planned is working perfectly.

-Nora is sure Frederick
murdered you.

She thinks Frederick attacked
her in the cellar, not me.

And now Nora is almost
out of her mind with fear.

The heads, the music,
your hanging.

I tell you, when Frederick walks
in there, she'll shoot him.

-It's taking too long.

David, you ought to be there.

-When you hear the shot,
come down to the cellar.

-Nora! No!

-Ugh!

-David?

David.

-At last you've got it all.

Everything I have,
even my life.

But you're not going
to live to enjoy it.

Come with me, murderess,
come with me.

-Good night, Doctor.

Good night, Annabelle.

The crime you two planned
was indeed perfect.

Only the victim is alive
and the murderers are not.

It's a pity you didn't know when
started your game of murder

that I was playing, too.

-There must be some
way to get in here!

-It's right along here,
some what.

-Lance!

I've shot Mr. Loren!
He's down in the wine cellar.

-Alive?
-I don't think so.

It's him! He's alive!

-You didn't shoot anyone,
my dear.

I loaded your gun with blanks.

I can tell you all now

Trent and my wife were
planning to kill me.

They failed.

Trent tried to throw me
in the vat.

My wife stumbled and fell.

I'm ready for justice to decide

if I'm innocent or guilty.

-Now there are nine.

There'll be more, many more.

They're coming for me now.

And then they will come for you.

-So Vincent Price was
the master puppeteer,

orchestrating everything,
including the hokey skeleton

that terrorizes Annabelle.

I have a question, Darcy.
-Yes.

-The two conspiratorial
lovers, Annabelle and Trent,

they have planned
this whole thing

so that Nora will kill
Vincent Price.

And the way they do that
is they make her so nervous

that she's jumpy,
and then they give her a gun,

and then they send Vincent Price
down to where she is.

-Correct.

-Isn't that kind
of a lame plan

with very little chance
of success?

I mean, it depends on, A,
she has to be a scaredy cat.

B, she has to believe in
the ghost of Annabelle.

And by the way, when the
Annabelle ghost appears to her,

what's that whole thing
about the rope

that snakes out of the window
and circles her feet,

and then it un-circles her feet,

and then it goes back
out of the window and...

-Yes?

-And, C, she has to be good
with a gun.

She has to not miss.

And, D, she has to want
to kill Vincent Price.

Isn't that a really long chain
of stuff

that has to happen
before they get what they want?

-It's a William Castle movie.
-Okay.

If we scare her bad enough,
she'll definitely kill him.

-Exactly. It makes sense.
-Okay, well,

this was the second hit
in a row for William Castle,

and it led to another
Vincent Price success,

"The Tingler."
-Ooh.

-One of Castle's
most famous films, the one

where he wired the seats so that
the audience got a little shock

when the parasite got loose
in the theater.

Castle made several
more horror films.

He made "Homicidal,"
he made "Mr. Sardonicus,"

he made "Strait-Jacket"
with Joan Crawford.

He made "13 Ghosts."

You wore these things.

This is a ghost viewer.

To see them,
you look through here.

This is a ghost remover
down here.

"To not see the ghost,
look through here."

You know, like, who's
going to look through here?

Scaredy cat.

-So, anyway, um,

he thought he'd finally gotten
to the top of the industry

when he bought the rights
to Ira Levin's

best selling novel,
"Rosemary's Baby."

He mortgaged his house
to buy that novel,

and Paramount Pictures was
willing to make the film,

but not with William Castle
as director.

The studio just didn't
regard him as a "real" director.

So he became a producer
on that project instead.

Roman Polanski got
the directing assignment,

and Roman Polanski got
the glory

when the 1968 film version
became one of Paramount's

biggest hits
and one of the most successful

horror films ever made.

Castle would live till 1977.

He would retire
with 66 directing credits,

including "Bug,"
which was his answer to "Jaws"

that was released
shortly before his death.

And by the way,
the guy who turns out to be

the villain, Dr. David Trent,
he's played by Alan Marshal,

who also met a
most untimely death.

Um, he's the guy
who died on stage

while appearing in
the play "Sextette"

with Mae West
in Chicago in 1961.

So "House on Haunted Hill"
was released on

February 17, 1959 at
the Golden Gate Theater

in San Francisco, where it made
the highest grosses

in that theater's history.

The line was six blocks long.

To get in,
there was a huge tombstone

erected in front of the theater
with the inscription,

"Here lies the body
of Frisby Quill.

He went to see
'House on Haunted Hill.'"

And it happened to open
on the same day as the arrival

of William Castle's
second child, a daughter.

So to celebrate,
Castle gave a cigar

to every patron in the theater,
including children.

Aww.

-The film earned over $4 million
on a budget of $150,000.

And those were numbers
that caught the attention

of Alfred Hitchcock,
who was inspired

to make "Psycho" as a result.

And the modern era
of horror was launched.

What do you think, Darcy?
-About "House on Haunted Hill"?

-Yeah.
-It's amazing. It's amazing.

-Okay,
that's your succinct review.

"House on Haunted Hill,"
amazing.

That's it?
-Do I really have to explain

why this movie is awesome?
-Yes.

-It's the perfect blend
of camp,

but not too campy.

It's got beautiful,
creepy atmosphere.

Vincent Price
at his sinister best.

Serving elegance
and a side of menace.

Right?
-Yeah.

The practical effects,
haunted house tropes.

Just amazing.

It's playful,
but genuinely eerie.

Is that enough for you?

Does that explain it?
-Alright.

-It's fun.
-I'll take that.

-Well, alright,
we got The Innkeepers coming up

in a few minutes
here on Haunt Night.

Um, but first...
-We have mailbag.

-Oh.
-You distract me

with all your talking.

-Alright, what you got?

-Hold on.
Here you go.

-Alright.
-It's from Zach White of Austin.

-Man, a lot of stuff in here.

"Dear -- Dear Joe Bob."

What in the world?

Okay. Oh.
"Dear, Joe Bob.

I have been a fan of yours since
the days of 'MonsterVision.'

I felt right away our senses
of humor just clicked.

I had definitely found a kindred
spirit in this horror loving,

quirky Texan named
Joe Bob Briggs."

Kindred spirit, Darcy.
-They exist.

"As with so many of your fans,

you've helped me
through some dark times

and kept me laughing at
the absurdity of life.

As a fellow Texan and
particularly a native Austinite,

I too am enthralled, obsessed,

and oddly,
constantly reinvigorated by

the cultural phenomenon that is
'The Texas Chain Saw Massacre'

and all the mystique
that surrounds it.

And to that end,
please send me a copy

of your Texas Monthly article
on 'Chain Saw.'

I'm really looking
forward to reading it."

Um, should I point out
that that article

has been greatly expanded
and will be out

this year in book form?

-I feel like you just did.
-Alright.

-Um, "I have a 'Chain Saw' story
of my own I think you will like.

When my mom and dad
and some extended family

were visiting
Ireland some years ago,

they found themselves
in conversation with some locals

in a downtown pub."
-Downtown where?

-Downtown Ireland.
-Okay.

Um...

"One -- One of the men, upon
hearing they were from Texas,

promptly gave
his solemn condolences to my dad

for the terrible tragedy

that had happened
'down there in Texas.'

Realizing the Irishman
was referring to

the 'Texas Chain Saw Massacre,'
my dad assured him

that it had in fact
been only a movie.

The man fell silent
and took on an air

of having had
his intelligence insulted,

as if my dad had burst
his proverbial bubble

by contradicting his
long held belief

that the
"Texas Chain Saw Massacre"

had been a real life tragedy,

a horrific affliction
shared by all Texans.

My dad told me in hindsight
he wishes he had played along."

You know, I get this all
the time. Um...

-Comments from pubs
in downtown Ireland?

-Well, no, but
people telling me they know

the real life families
involved in

"The Texas Chain Saw Massacre."

-What...are you saying?

That people in Texas
would lie about that?

-Everyone, everywhere,
not just in Texas,

everyone everywhere lies about
"The Texas Chain Saw Massacre."

Well, they're not really lying.

I think they're just deluded.
Anyway...

Alright, "Lastly,
please find enclosed a photo" --

Here it is -- "Of my dad,
granddad, great uncle, cousin,

and the hero of
'The Texas Chain Saw Massacre,'

the truck driver."

"Ed Gwynne,
circa early '90s.

My dad met Ed in the '80s
after moving to Austin

and they became fast buds

through their
mutual musicianship.

I asked dad recently if he ever
discussed 'Chain Saw' with Ed

back in the day, and he said no,

that 'Chain Saw' was still
very taboo at the time,

more something to be shied away
from rather than be analyzed,

much less celebrated.

Thank you for your time
in reading this, Joe Bob.

Drive-in will never die
because it resides in each

and every one of us.

Forever yours in kindred spirit
in the Texas Hill country

and in the absurdity
of this crazy thing

we call consciousness,
Zach White, Austin, Texas."

And enclose this picture,
I can point him out.

This is Ed Gwynn on the left,
the guy who stops

his semi to let Sally jump in,

and he throws his wrench
at Leatherface

and knocks him down
at the end of the movie.

And -- And over here on the,
um, extreme right,

um, that's Jack's dad.

Uh, and this appears to be --

Or I guess this is Jack's dad,

and this appears to be at,
um, Deep Sea headquarters,

which is the cool Marina
in Port Aransas,

where you go out 30 or
40 miles to catch the Marlins

and the sailfish
and the yellowfin

and all the big boy stuff.

The wahoo.

You ever eat a wahoo, Darcy?

-I don't eat fish.
-You're missing out.

-Oh, I'm -- I'm okay with that.
-Okay.

Okay.
Thank you, Jack,

for those reminiscences
and for making me feel at home.

I'm going to go down
to Port Aransas

and get me a mackerel,
and that's it for me.

Joe Bob Briggs
speaking for myself

and for Darcy the Mail Girl
when I say that

you can't get --
you can't get lard

unless you boil the hog,
and the drive-in will never die.

I entered 10 puns in a contest
to see which one would win.

-And?
-No pun-in-10-did.

-Ha.
Well, I like that kind.

I like the cheesy ones.
-Huh?

-Why don't blind
people skydive?

Because it scares their dogs.

-Alright,
guy goes to confession.

He says, "Bless me, father,
for I have sinned.

On Friday, I went golfing
and I used the F word."

And the priest says, "Well,
tell me about that, my son."

And the man says,
"Well, I was on the first tee

and I shanked it wide left."

And the priest says,
"Oh, you must have said --

said the F word
after you did that."

The man goes, "No, because
the ball went into the woods.

It hit a tree and bounced back
into the middle of the fairway."

And the priest says,
"Then what happened?"

The man says,
"I hit my second shot

and I sliced it wide right."

The priest says,
"So that's when you said it?"

The man says, "No,
because my shot hit the ball

washer machine on the next hole,

popped up, rolled back
into the low rough."

And the priest says,
"Oh, so you said it

when you ended up in the rough?"

And the man says, "No, because I
took my wedge and I hit it,

and it wound up on the green
about six inches from the cup."

And the priest takes this in
and thinks about it,

and then he says, "Don't tell me
you missed that fucking putt?"

-They really like that one.

-Oh!
-Not the skeleton. Oh, no!