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1
00:00:01,829 --> 00:00:01,829
████████████████████████████████
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00:00:01,829 --> 00:00:02,705
Helga:
ARNOLD!
3
00:00:02,788 --> 00:00:04,289
( barking )
4
00:00:04,665 --> 00:00:06,625
HEY, ARNOLD!
5
00:00:10,713 --> 00:00:13,006
( glass shatters )
6
00:00:16,552 --> 00:00:17,511
( girl shrieks )
7
00:00:17,594 --> 00:00:20,389
Helga:
HEY, ARNOLD!
8
00:00:21,223 --> 00:00:23,517
ARNOLD!
9
00:00:24,309 --> 00:00:26,353
ARNOLD!
10
00:00:26,645 --> 00:00:29,523
ARNOLD!
11
00:00:29,606 --> 00:00:33,277
[Captioning sponsored by THE
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
12
00:00:33,360 --> 00:00:35,821
and NICKELODEON]
13
00:00:37,322 --> 00:00:38,240
AR-NOLD!
14
00:00:39,616 --> 00:00:41,618
MOVE IT,
FOOTBALL HEAD!
15
00:00:41,702 --> 00:00:43,746
Kids:
HEY, ARNOLD!
16
00:00:55,883 --> 00:00:56,967
Grandpa:
OH, BOY, THIS IS THE LIFE...
17
00:00:57,050 --> 00:01:01,180
SITTING IN A PACKARD
SIPPING ROOT BEER FLOATS
18
00:01:01,263 --> 00:01:04,308
WITH ONE OF MY
FAVORITE GRANDSONS.
19
00:01:04,391 --> 00:01:06,727
JUST KIDDING--
YOU'RE MY FAVORITE.
20
00:01:07,686 --> 00:01:07,978
( crash )
21
00:01:08,061 --> 00:01:08,979
MOTHER HUBBARD!
22
00:01:09,062 --> 00:01:12,316
WHO IN THE BLUE BLAZES
JUST SLAMMED INTO MY CAR?
23
00:01:12,399 --> 00:01:14,777
ARNOLD?
24
00:01:14,860 --> 00:01:15,402
WHAT DO YOU KNOW?
25
00:01:15,486 --> 00:01:16,528
WE GOT OURSELVES
26
00:01:16,612 --> 00:01:17,946
AN OLD-FASHIONED FENDER-BENDER.
27
00:01:18,030 --> 00:01:20,324
ARE YOU BLIND,
YOU OLD BUZZARD?
28
00:01:20,407 --> 00:01:20,783
LOOK AT MY CAR!
29
00:01:20,866 --> 00:01:22,826
THIS IS YOUR FAULT!
30
00:01:22,910 --> 00:01:24,119
MY FAULT?
31
00:01:24,203 --> 00:01:25,579
YOU BACKED
RIGHT INTO US.
32
00:01:25,662 --> 00:01:27,247
HOPE YOU BROUGHT
YOUR CHECKBOOK.
33
00:01:27,331 --> 00:01:29,166
YOU'LL NEVER GET
A DIME OUT OF ME.
34
00:01:29,249 --> 00:01:29,625
OH, YEAH?
35
00:01:29,708 --> 00:01:30,584
YEAH!
36
00:01:30,667 --> 00:01:32,044
LOOK AT
THE DAMAGE HERE!
37
00:01:32,127 --> 00:01:33,212
NICE JOB, ARNOLD.
38
00:01:33,295 --> 00:01:35,130
DAD WILL YELL
ABOUT THIS FOR WEEKS.
39
00:01:35,214 --> 00:01:36,840
IT'S ONLY A LITTLE
FENDER-BENDER.
40
00:01:36,924 --> 00:01:37,925
THEY'LL WORK IT OUT.
41
00:01:38,008 --> 00:01:38,675
NYAH, NYAH,
NYAH, NYAH, NYAH.
42
00:01:38,759 --> 00:01:41,512
YOU CAN'T CATCH ME.
43
00:01:41,595 --> 00:01:42,554
LOOK, YOU, I DON'T
HAVE TIME FOR THIS.
44
00:01:42,638 --> 00:01:45,349
I'M LATE FOR
MY GOLF GAME.
45
00:01:45,432 --> 00:01:47,768
SO THAT'S WHY
YOU'RE IN THAT
IDIOTIC COSTUME--
46
00:01:47,851 --> 00:01:48,769
TO PLAY GOLF, EH?
47
00:01:48,852 --> 00:01:50,312
THAT'S RIGHT, GOLF.
48
00:01:50,395 --> 00:01:51,396
EVER HEARD OF IT?
49
00:01:51,480 --> 00:01:51,897
HEARD OF IT?
50
00:01:51,980 --> 00:01:52,773
WHY, I'VE BEEN GOLFING
51
00:01:52,856 --> 00:01:55,192
SINCE YOU WERE
KNEE HIGH TO A...
52
00:01:55,275 --> 00:01:57,277
I DON'T WANT
A HISTORY LESSON,
PRUNE FACE.
53
00:01:57,361 --> 00:01:58,195
I'M LATE.
54
00:01:58,278 --> 00:01:59,279
HEY, WAIT A MINUTE.
55
00:01:59,363 --> 00:02:01,573
HOW ABOUT YOU AND ME
SETTLE THIS THING
56
00:02:01,657 --> 00:02:02,533
OVER A GAME OF GOLF?
57
00:02:02,616 --> 00:02:06,036
SUNDAY-- LOSER
PAYS THE DAMAGES
FOR BOTH CARS.
58
00:02:06,119 --> 00:02:07,120
ALL RIGHT, YOU'RE ON.
59
00:02:07,204 --> 00:02:08,956
LET'S SHAKE ON IT
SO IT'S OFFICIAL.
60
00:02:09,039 --> 00:02:10,833
YOU'RE GOING DOWN
HARD, OLD MAN.
61
00:02:10,916 --> 00:02:13,043
SAVE YOUR STRENGTH
FOR THE GAME, PATAKI.
62
00:02:13,126 --> 00:02:15,295
COME ON, SHORT MAN,
LET'S RUMBLE.
63
00:02:16,588 --> 00:02:19,716
OH, ARNOLD, FATE HAS BROUGHT
OUR VEHICLES
64
00:02:19,800 --> 00:02:22,094
CRASHING TOGETHER TODAY
BY RECKLESS CHANCE.
65
00:02:22,177 --> 00:02:25,722
ALAS, IF ONLY OUR HEARTS,
OUR SOULS, OUR VERY BEINGS
66
00:02:25,806 --> 00:02:28,851
COULD SO FINITELY ENTANGLE.
67
00:02:28,934 --> 00:02:31,395
OH, WHAT A WRETCHED DILEMMA
IS THIS.
68
00:02:31,478 --> 00:02:34,231
TO WHOM SHOULD I FORSWEAR
MY ALLEGIANCE?
69
00:02:34,314 --> 00:02:36,066
TO BOB, THE BLUSTERY OGRE
70
00:02:36,149 --> 00:02:39,486
OR ARNOLD, HE WHO ALONE CAN SINK
A HOLE-IN-ONE IN MY HEART.
71
00:02:39,570 --> 00:02:41,613
Bob:
HEY, HELGA, I'LL
GIVE YOU 20 BUCKS
72
00:02:41,697 --> 00:02:42,739
TO CADDIE SUNDAY.
73
00:02:42,823 --> 00:02:44,116
DONE DEAL.
74
00:02:44,199 --> 00:02:46,618
Arnold:
YOU WORRIED ABOUT
THE GOLF GAME, GRANDPA?
75
00:02:46,702 --> 00:02:47,244
COURSE NOT.
76
00:02:47,327 --> 00:02:49,246
OH, WHY, I USED
TO PLAY GOLF
77
00:02:49,329 --> 00:02:50,497
WITH MY FRIEND,
JIMMY KAFKA
78
00:02:50,581 --> 00:02:51,790
WHEN I WAS A LAD.
79
00:02:51,874 --> 00:02:54,585
WE USED TO HIT THAT
BALL ALL DAY LONG.
80
00:02:54,668 --> 00:02:55,961
WE LOBBED IT,
HIT IT BACKHAND...
81
00:02:56,044 --> 00:02:59,256
ARE YOU SURE YOU'RE
TALKING ABOUT GOLF?
82
00:02:59,339 --> 00:03:00,132
SURE, I AM.
83
00:03:00,215 --> 00:03:01,758
I GOT THE RACKET
RIGHT HERE.
84
00:03:01,842 --> 00:03:03,093
THAT'S TENNIS.
85
00:03:03,176 --> 00:03:05,178
GOLF IS ABOUT HITTING
A SMALL, WHITE BALL
86
00:03:05,262 --> 00:03:06,430
REALLY LONG DISTANCES
87
00:03:06,513 --> 00:03:08,348
AND GETTING IT
IN A TINY HOLE.
88
00:03:08,432 --> 00:03:09,433
YOU MEAN THAT'S GOLF.
89
00:03:09,516 --> 00:03:11,268
THAT GAME THAT'S ON TV
ALL THE TIME
90
00:03:11,351 --> 00:03:13,437
WHERE THEY DRIVE
THE LITTLE CARS AROUND
91
00:03:13,520 --> 00:03:14,438
AND CARRY THOSE BAGS
FULL OF STICKS?
92
00:03:14,521 --> 00:03:16,148
YEAH.
93
00:03:16,231 --> 00:03:17,399
WE CALLED THAT TENNIS.
94
00:03:17,691 --> 00:03:19,735
UH-OH.
95
00:03:19,818 --> 00:03:22,404
OH, NOW THAT BLOWHARD'S
GOING TO BEAT ME
96
00:03:22,487 --> 00:03:23,739
AND NEVER
LET ME FORGET IT
97
00:03:23,822 --> 00:03:26,867
AND MAKE ME PAY
A HUGE MECHANIC'S BILL.
98
00:03:26,950 --> 00:03:27,743
OH!
99
00:03:27,826 --> 00:03:28,493
DO YOU KNOW HOW
TO PLAY GOLF?
100
00:03:28,577 --> 00:03:30,495
UH, NOT REALLY.
101
00:03:30,579 --> 00:03:31,955
PERFECT, YOU'RE
A FINE COACH.
102
00:03:32,039 --> 00:03:32,831
BUT, I...
103
00:03:34,207 --> 00:03:34,875
I NEED A BALL
HERE, HELGA.
104
00:03:34,958 --> 00:03:37,669
CAN'T PLAY GOLF
WITHOUT A BALL.
105
00:03:37,753 --> 00:03:39,838
IT'S THE CADDIE'S JOB
106
00:03:39,922 --> 00:03:41,798
TO PLACE THE BALL
ON THE TEE.
107
00:03:41,882 --> 00:03:43,592
I'M PAYING YOU 20 BUCKS.
108
00:03:43,675 --> 00:03:45,802
PLACE THE BALL
SO I CAN START GOLFING.
109
00:03:45,886 --> 00:03:46,470
THERE.
110
00:03:46,553 --> 00:03:48,555
NOW, GET BACK
OUT OF THE WAY
111
00:03:48,639 --> 00:03:49,765
SO I CAN TEE OFF.
112
00:03:49,848 --> 00:03:51,767
( grunts )
113
00:03:53,352 --> 00:03:55,562
WOW! YOU ALMOST GOT
A HOLE-IN-ONE, DAD.
114
00:03:55,646 --> 00:03:59,274
OF COURSE-- I'VE BEEN PLAYING
THIS GAME SINCE I WAS FIVE.
115
00:03:59,358 --> 00:04:00,525
NOW, QUIT YOUR YAPPING
116
00:04:00,609 --> 00:04:02,194
AND PICK UP
THE PACE... CADDIE.
117
00:04:02,277 --> 00:04:03,862
( grumbles )
118
00:04:05,822 --> 00:04:07,532
Arnold:
WE NEED SOME GOLF CLUBS.
119
00:04:07,616 --> 00:04:08,492
Clerk:
BEGINNER?
120
00:04:08,575 --> 00:04:10,202
Grandpa:
I WOULDN'T GO THAT FAR.
121
00:04:10,285 --> 00:04:12,663
THEN I RECOMMEND YOU START
WITH THESE.
122
00:04:12,746 --> 00:04:14,498
THEY'RE ON SPECIAL TODAY.
123
00:04:14,581 --> 00:04:15,999
LET ME TRY THAT OUT.
124
00:04:17,709 --> 00:04:19,127
( crash )
125
00:04:19,211 --> 00:04:19,878
WE'LL TAKE THEM.
126
00:04:19,962 --> 00:04:21,338
YOU'LL ALSO GET
127
00:04:21,421 --> 00:04:24,007
MY I GUARANTEE YOU'LL LEARN
HOW TO PLAY GOLF
128
00:04:24,091 --> 00:04:25,926
IF YOU WATCH THIS VIDEO VIDEO.
129
00:04:26,009 --> 00:04:28,762
Take your putter
and carefully aim...
130
00:04:28,845 --> 00:04:30,389
( muttering in sleep ):
CAREFULLY AIM...
131
00:04:30,472 --> 00:04:31,932
...you'll master
this exciting game.
132
00:04:32,015 --> 00:04:33,558
HOW'S THE VIDEO,
GRANDPA?
133
00:04:33,642 --> 00:04:35,852
HUH, EH, WHAT?
134
00:04:35,936 --> 00:04:37,187
OH, HEY,
THE VIDEO, YEAH.
135
00:04:37,270 --> 00:04:39,189
PUT IT ON AND WENT
STRAIGHT TO SLEEP.
136
00:04:39,272 --> 00:04:40,649
THE MATCH IS
IN A FEW DAYS.
137
00:04:40,732 --> 00:04:41,358
MAYBE WE BETTER
GO OUTSIDE
138
00:04:41,441 --> 00:04:43,694
AND ACTUALLY TRY
HITTING THE BALL.
139
00:04:43,777 --> 00:04:45,320
OKAY, FINE, WE'LL TRY IT
YOUR WAY.
140
00:04:48,281 --> 00:04:49,950
IS THIS ALL
THERE IS TO IT?
141
00:04:50,033 --> 00:04:52,202
YOU'RE SUPPOSED
TO USE TWO HANDS.
142
00:04:52,285 --> 00:04:53,370
NOW, TAKE YOUR TIME.
143
00:04:53,453 --> 00:04:54,621
CONCENTRATE,
THEN SWING.
144
00:04:54,705 --> 00:04:55,914
( grunts )
145
00:04:57,290 --> 00:05:00,252
SWING A LITTLE LOWER
THIS TIME, GRANDPA.
146
00:05:03,964 --> 00:05:04,881
( glass shatters )
147
00:05:04,965 --> 00:05:06,216
( car alarms wailing )
148
00:05:06,299 --> 00:05:09,344
ONE MORE TIME
BEFORE THE COPS COME.
149
00:05:09,428 --> 00:05:09,886
( clang )
150
00:05:10,262 --> 00:05:11,054
( clang )
151
00:05:12,139 --> 00:05:14,558
( bees swarming )
152
00:05:14,641 --> 00:05:15,809
( screaming )
153
00:05:15,892 --> 00:05:16,977
( Grandpa groans )
154
00:05:17,060 --> 00:05:18,729
BOY, I REALLY STINK
AT GOLF, HUH?
155
00:05:18,812 --> 00:05:21,023
YOU DON'T STINK, GRANDPA.
156
00:05:21,106 --> 00:05:22,482
YOU'RE REALLY IMPROVING.
157
00:05:22,566 --> 00:05:23,567
THE GAME'S TOMORROW.
158
00:05:23,650 --> 00:05:25,485
YOU SHOULD GET
A GOOD NIGHT'S REST.
159
00:05:25,569 --> 00:05:28,071
MMM, I DON'T WANT
TO DISAPPOINT THE BOY
160
00:05:28,155 --> 00:05:29,364
BUT I GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE.
161
00:05:35,245 --> 00:05:36,246
( door opens )
162
00:05:36,329 --> 00:05:36,621
Arnold:
GRANDPA?
163
00:05:36,705 --> 00:05:38,415
WHERE YOU GOING?
164
00:05:38,498 --> 00:05:39,750
ME? I'M, UH...
165
00:05:39,833 --> 00:05:42,335
I'M TAKING MY SUITCASE OUT...
TO BE CLEANED.
166
00:05:42,419 --> 00:05:43,545
THERE'S AN ALL-NIGHT CLEANERS.
167
00:05:45,589 --> 00:05:47,007
WERE YOU TRYING
TO SNEAK OUT?
168
00:05:47,090 --> 00:05:50,635
OKAY, OKAY, YOU WORE ME DOWN.
169
00:05:50,719 --> 00:05:52,763
I WAS TRYING
TO SNEAK OUT.
170
00:05:52,846 --> 00:05:55,432
I'M SORRY, ARNOLD,
BUT I JUST CAN'T GOLF.
171
00:05:55,515 --> 00:05:56,767
THAT'S NO REASON
TO RUN AWAY.
172
00:05:56,850 --> 00:05:59,102
I CAN'T BEAT BIG BOB,
AND I'LL EMBARRASS YOU
173
00:05:59,186 --> 00:06:00,228
IN FRONT OF YOUR
LITTLE UGLY FRIEND
174
00:06:00,312 --> 00:06:03,315
WITH THE ONE EYEBROW
AND... ( sobbing )
175
00:06:03,398 --> 00:06:04,524
IT'S OKAY, GRANDPA.
176
00:06:04,608 --> 00:06:07,944
BUT THE HUMILIATION,
ARNOLD, THE HUMILIATION.
177
00:06:08,028 --> 00:06:10,572
GRANDPA,
YOU CAN'T RUN AWAY.
178
00:06:10,655 --> 00:06:11,531
SURE I CAN.
179
00:06:11,615 --> 00:06:12,991
SAY, DO YOU WANT
TO COME WITH ME?
180
00:06:13,075 --> 00:06:15,535
GRANDPA, YOU HAVE TO DO THIS.
181
00:06:15,619 --> 00:06:16,828
IT'S MORE HUMILIATING
IF YOU RUN AWAY.
182
00:06:16,912 --> 00:06:19,122
BUT I'M GOING TO LOSE.
183
00:06:19,206 --> 00:06:21,792
WELL, YOU PROBABLY
ARE GOING TO LOSE.
184
00:06:21,875 --> 00:06:23,627
BUT IT'S BETTER
TO LOSE GRACEFULLY
185
00:06:23,710 --> 00:06:25,295
THAN TO NEVER HAVE TRIED AT ALL.
186
00:06:25,378 --> 00:06:27,923
WHERE'S YOU LEARN THAT MALARKEY?
NOT FROM ME.
187
00:06:28,006 --> 00:06:28,381
GRANDPA.
188
00:06:28,465 --> 00:06:30,300
OKAY, OKAY, YOU WIN.
189
00:06:30,383 --> 00:06:33,845
I'LL PLAY THAT BLOWHARD
BIG BOB TOMORROW.
190
00:06:33,929 --> 00:06:35,055
GOOD.
191
00:06:35,138 --> 00:06:36,848
NOW, LET'S GET
SOME SLEEP, OKAY?
192
00:06:36,932 --> 00:06:37,974
THE ONLY THING THAT'LL
PUT ME TO SLEEP
193
00:06:38,058 --> 00:06:39,476
IS THAT STUPID
GOLF VIDEO.
194
00:06:42,354 --> 00:06:45,107
Take your putter
and carefully aim
195
00:06:45,190 --> 00:06:48,318
and soon you'll master
this exciting game.
196
00:06:48,401 --> 00:06:53,406
( sleepily ):
TAKE YOUR PUTTER AND CAREFULLY
AIM AND SOON... ( snoring )
197
00:06:55,659 --> 00:06:57,327
TAILS IT IS--
I GO FIRST.
198
00:06:57,410 --> 00:06:57,786
HAND ME MY DRIVER, OLGA.
199
00:06:57,869 --> 00:06:59,746
IT'S HELGA, DAD.
200
00:06:59,830 --> 00:07:01,123
H-E-L-G-A.
201
00:07:01,206 --> 00:07:03,583
I KNOW HOW
TO SPELL, OLGA.
202
00:07:03,667 --> 00:07:03,708
( grunts )
203
00:07:06,670 --> 00:07:09,131
HA! BEAT THAT, OLD TIMER.
204
00:07:11,007 --> 00:07:13,135
YOU CAN DO IT, GRANDPA--
CONCENTRATE.
205
00:07:14,177 --> 00:07:16,763
WHEN YOU'RE TEEING OFF,
HIT THE BALL IN A LOFT.
206
00:07:16,847 --> 00:07:17,597
ATTEMPT TO LAND IT
ON THE GREEN
207
00:07:17,681 --> 00:07:20,600
AND NOT ALL THAT
OTHER GRASS IN BETWEEN.
208
00:07:20,684 --> 00:07:21,309
( grunts )
209
00:07:22,602 --> 00:07:22,894
WOW!
210
00:07:22,978 --> 00:07:24,437
MOTHER GOOSE!
211
00:07:26,648 --> 00:07:28,108
THAT WAS FANTASTIC, GRANDPA.
212
00:07:28,191 --> 00:07:29,192
WHAT HAPPENED?
213
00:07:29,276 --> 00:07:30,360
YOU GOT ME, SHORT MAN.
214
00:07:30,443 --> 00:07:32,279
I SUDDENLY FOUND MYSELF
SAYING A RHYME
215
00:07:32,362 --> 00:07:34,781
FROM THAT IDIOTIC
HOW-TO-PLAY-GOLF VIDEO
216
00:07:34,865 --> 00:07:35,991
AND BINGO!
217
00:07:36,616 --> 00:07:39,119
HA! THAT'S THREE-- A BIRDIE.
218
00:07:39,202 --> 00:07:41,204
YOUR SHOT,
METHUSELAH.
219
00:07:42,914 --> 00:07:45,250
CONCENTRATE, CONCENTRATE,
DON'T LOOK UP.
220
00:07:45,333 --> 00:07:48,003
TAP THE BALL LIGHTLY
AND INTO THE CUP.
221
00:07:48,962 --> 00:07:50,297
( cheering )
222
00:07:50,380 --> 00:07:51,006
YOU GOT AN EAGLE.
223
00:07:51,089 --> 00:07:51,631
LIKE A BIRDIE?
224
00:07:51,715 --> 00:07:53,633
IT'S BETTER-- YOU'RE AHEAD.
225
00:07:53,717 --> 00:07:55,677
WHAT IN THE HECK
IS GOING ON HERE?
226
00:07:57,971 --> 00:07:59,181
WITH THE WEDGE,
CHIP THE BALL HIGH
227
00:07:59,264 --> 00:08:01,308
AND INTO THE CUP LET IT FLY.
228
00:08:01,391 --> 00:08:02,100
( grunts )
229
00:08:05,312 --> 00:08:06,188
( groans )
230
00:08:08,481 --> 00:08:10,192
HIT THE BALL HARD
AND HIT IT TRUE
231
00:08:10,275 --> 00:08:12,068
AIM FOR THE FLAGPOLE
AND FOLLOW THROUGH.
232
00:08:12,152 --> 00:08:12,569
( grunts )
233
00:08:12,652 --> 00:08:14,529
( onlookers gasp )
234
00:08:15,655 --> 00:08:17,908
( gasps loudly )
235
00:08:17,991 --> 00:08:18,742
( cheering )
236
00:08:18,825 --> 00:08:20,243
WHOO-HOO!
237
00:08:21,494 --> 00:08:22,579
MAN, WHAT A GAME.
238
00:08:22,662 --> 00:08:25,248
I CAN'T BELIEVE GRANDPA
AND YOUR DAD ARE TIED.
239
00:08:25,332 --> 00:08:26,499
YEAH, YEAH,
I CAN'T WAIT
240
00:08:26,583 --> 00:08:28,126
FOR THIS STUPID
GAME TO BE OVER.
241
00:08:28,210 --> 00:08:29,377
I HATE LUGGING
THIS...
242
00:08:29,461 --> 00:08:30,170
FORE!
243
00:08:30,253 --> 00:08:31,421
DOOP!
244
00:08:31,504 --> 00:08:32,297
ARE YOU OKAY?
245
00:08:32,380 --> 00:08:33,965
SAY SOMETHING.
246
00:08:34,049 --> 00:08:35,800
( sweetly ):
OH, ARNOLD, I'M FINE
247
00:08:35,884 --> 00:08:37,219
AS LONG AS
YOU'RE NEAR ME.
248
00:08:37,302 --> 00:08:38,595
YOUR HONEST EYES
249
00:08:38,678 --> 00:08:40,597
SO FULL OF
CONCERN AND...
250
00:08:40,680 --> 00:08:43,183
HELGA, WHAT IS
WRONG WITH YOU?!
251
00:08:43,266 --> 00:08:44,226
THAT WAS HEADED
252
00:08:44,309 --> 00:08:45,268
STRAIGHT FOR THE CUP!
253
00:08:45,352 --> 00:08:47,604
THIS COULD COST ME
THE WHOLE GAME.
254
00:08:47,687 --> 00:08:48,688
I'M FINE, BOB.
255
00:08:48,772 --> 00:08:49,856
THANKS FOR ASKING.
256
00:08:49,940 --> 00:08:51,441
THEN GET YOUR FANNY
ONTO THE GREEN
257
00:08:51,524 --> 00:08:51,983
AND HOLD
THE FLAG FOR ME.
258
00:08:52,067 --> 00:08:54,778
HOLD YOUR OWN FLAG, BOB.
259
00:08:54,861 --> 00:08:55,987
I QUIT!
260
00:08:56,071 --> 00:08:57,280
AND YOU CAN KEEP
YOUR LOUSY 20 BUCKS.
261
00:08:57,364 --> 00:08:59,741
FINE, I DON'T NEED A CADDIE.
262
00:09:03,078 --> 00:09:05,288
OH, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!
263
00:09:05,372 --> 00:09:07,916
THAT MAKES 77 FOR BIG BOB
264
00:09:07,999 --> 00:09:09,626
AND 75 FOR YOU, GRANDPA.
265
00:09:09,709 --> 00:09:10,543
OH, I THOUGHT I WAS AHEAD.
266
00:09:10,627 --> 00:09:13,755
YOU ARE-- BOB HAS
TWO MORE STROKES THAN YOU.
267
00:09:13,838 --> 00:09:14,923
THAT PUTS YOU AHEAD.
268
00:09:15,006 --> 00:09:16,091
WELL, WHAT DO
YOU KNOW?
269
00:09:16,174 --> 00:09:17,968
Arnold:
THIS IS GREAT.
270
00:09:18,051 --> 00:09:19,302
JUST ONE HOLE TO GO.
271
00:09:23,598 --> 00:09:26,101
COME ON, HURRY IT UP, GRAMPS.
272
00:09:26,184 --> 00:09:27,102
HIT IT ALREADY.
273
00:09:27,185 --> 00:09:28,478
EVERYTHING OKAY,
GRANDPA?
274
00:09:28,561 --> 00:09:29,062
OH, I DON'T KNOW,
ARNOLD.
275
00:09:29,145 --> 00:09:30,397
THIS IS A CRAZY HOLE--
276
00:09:30,480 --> 00:09:33,900
A LONG FAIRWAY,
THEN THERE'S A DOG LEG
277
00:09:33,984 --> 00:09:35,026
BETWEEN TWO WATER HAZARDS
278
00:09:35,110 --> 00:09:35,860
AND THEN A SAND TRAP
279
00:09:35,944 --> 00:09:38,280
AND THEN THERE'S THAT
BIG CERAMIC GNOME.
280
00:09:38,363 --> 00:09:40,824
WELL, SAY A POEM
AND HIT THE BALL.
281
00:09:40,907 --> 00:09:41,992
BUT THAT'S JUST IT.
282
00:09:42,075 --> 00:09:44,327
I DON'T KNOW ANY CUTE,
RHYMING COUPLETS
283
00:09:44,411 --> 00:09:45,829
FOR THIS KIND OF HOLE.
284
00:09:45,912 --> 00:09:47,289
HIT IT, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!
285
00:09:47,372 --> 00:09:49,165
THEN JUST MAKE UP
A RHYME.
286
00:09:49,249 --> 00:09:50,166
OKAY, HERE IT GOES.
287
00:09:50,250 --> 00:09:53,128
REAL LONG FAIRWAY,
BIG DOG LEG
288
00:09:53,211 --> 00:09:56,631
I HATE SAND TRAPS,
BUT I LIKE EGGS
289
00:09:56,715 --> 00:09:58,300
WATER HAZARDS
LEFT AND RIGHT
290
00:09:58,383 --> 00:10:00,593
SMACK THE BALL
WITH ALL YOUR MIGHT!
291
00:10:00,677 --> 00:10:00,802
( grunts )
292
00:10:04,222 --> 00:10:06,891
AH, FALLING APART
ON THE 18th HOLE,
HUH, GRAMPS?
293
00:10:06,975 --> 00:10:07,809
( grunts )
294
00:10:07,892 --> 00:10:11,688
SEE YOU ON THE GREEN...
WITH YOUR CHECKBOOK.
295
00:10:11,771 --> 00:10:13,189
OKAY, OKAY, YOU CAN DO IT.
296
00:10:13,273 --> 00:10:15,358
MILES TO GO, BIG BOB'S A JERK.
297
00:10:15,442 --> 00:10:17,944
LET'S JUST HIT IT,
HOPE IT WORKS.
298
00:10:18,028 --> 00:10:18,611
( grunts )
299
00:10:21,740 --> 00:10:22,574
( dishes clatter )
300
00:10:22,657 --> 00:10:25,410
WAITER, THERE'S A GOLF BALL
IN MY QUICHE.
301
00:10:25,493 --> 00:10:27,454
Grandpa:
DON'T TOUCH THAT BALL!
302
00:10:27,537 --> 00:10:28,788
JUST US
PLAYING THROUGH.
303
00:10:28,872 --> 00:10:30,040
I'LL BE GONE
IN A MINUTE.
304
00:10:30,123 --> 00:10:31,333
WHAT'S THE SCORE?
305
00:10:31,416 --> 00:10:32,292
BOB'S AHEAD BY TWO STROKES.
306
00:10:32,375 --> 00:10:35,545
THERE'S ONLY ONE
WAY YOU CAN WIN:
307
00:10:35,628 --> 00:10:37,047
YOU HAVE TO
SINK THIS SHOT.
308
00:10:37,130 --> 00:10:39,382
DO YOU KNOW ANY WORDS
THAT RHYME WITH "QUICHE"?
309
00:10:39,466 --> 00:10:40,884
UH, HOW ABOUT THIS:
310
00:10:40,967 --> 00:10:44,054
THESE PEOPLE ARE BRUNCHING,
YOUR BALL'S IN THEIR QUICHE
311
00:10:44,137 --> 00:10:47,766
AND WINNING THE GOLF GAME
MAY SEEM OUT OF... RICHE.
312
00:10:47,849 --> 00:10:50,894
IT'LL TAKE A MIRACLE TO WIN,
BUT YOU'VE COME SO VERY FAR
313
00:10:50,977 --> 00:10:52,437
SO CLOSE YOUR EYES, SWING HARD
314
00:10:52,520 --> 00:10:54,481
AND HOPE THAT BOB PAYS
FOR YOUR CAR.
315
00:10:54,564 --> 00:11:00,153
OH, ARNOLD, THAT WAS THE WORST,
STUPIDEST POEM I'VE EVER HEARD!
316
00:11:00,236 --> 00:11:01,946
THANKS FOR TRYING,
SHORT MAN.
317
00:11:02,030 --> 00:11:04,324
I GOT TO WIN THIS THING
BY MYSELF.
318
00:11:04,407 --> 00:11:05,742
HERE GOES NOTHING.
319
00:11:05,825 --> 00:11:06,576
( grunts )
320
00:11:11,164 --> 00:11:11,915
( gasps )
321
00:11:12,999 --> 00:11:14,542
( wind whistles lightly )
322
00:11:17,045 --> 00:11:19,589
( cheering )
323
00:11:19,672 --> 00:11:21,091
YOU DID IT, GRANDPA!
324
00:11:21,174 --> 00:11:23,134
DID WHAT? I'M NOT WEARING
MY GLASSES.
325
00:11:23,218 --> 00:11:23,635
YOU BIRDIED.
326
00:11:23,718 --> 00:11:25,261
OH, I HIT A BIRDIE.
327
00:11:25,345 --> 00:11:26,471
THAT'S TERRIBLE.
328
00:11:26,554 --> 00:11:27,639
NO, YOU WON.
329
00:11:27,722 --> 00:11:29,599
OOH, THAT'S WONDERFUL.
330
00:11:29,682 --> 00:11:30,767
HOW'S THE BIRD?
331
00:11:30,850 --> 00:11:33,103
WELL, THANKS FOR ALL
YOUR HELP, SHORT MAN.
332
00:11:33,186 --> 00:11:35,814
WHAT DO YOU SAY WE
GET A ROOT BEER FLOAT?
333
00:11:35,897 --> 00:11:36,940
( crash )
334
00:11:37,023 --> 00:11:39,859
WELL, IT'S DEJA VU
ALL OVER AGAIN, GRAMPS.
335
00:11:39,943 --> 00:11:42,278
I'M MAKING YOU
PAY UP IN CASH.
336
00:11:42,362 --> 00:11:43,363
WELL, WHAT DO YOU SAY
WE PLAY TENNIS
337
00:11:43,446 --> 00:11:46,116
FOR THE WHOLE
KIT AND CABOODLE?
338
00:11:46,199 --> 00:11:47,575
OH, DON'T
GET ME STARTED.
339
00:11:54,749 --> 00:11:55,667
SAY HELLO
TO MY BRAND-NEW
340
00:11:55,750 --> 00:12:00,380
CANDY-APPLE RED, PATENT LEATHER
CAPRINI PLATFORMS.
341
00:12:00,463 --> 00:12:01,172
THEY WERE CUSTOM-
MADE IN MILAN.
342
00:12:01,256 --> 00:12:03,967
YOU KNOW,
CUSTOM-MADE
343
00:12:04,050 --> 00:12:06,928
AS IN THEY ONLY FIT ME.
344
00:12:07,011 --> 00:12:09,639
( kids gasp )
345
00:12:09,722 --> 00:12:11,057
SORRY, RHONDA.
346
00:12:11,141 --> 00:12:12,100
SORRY?
347
00:12:12,183 --> 00:12:15,770
YOU JUST SCUFFED
MY ONE-OF-A-KIND
CAPRINI PLATFORM.
348
00:12:15,854 --> 00:12:18,148
LOOK, IT WAS
JUST AN ACCIDENT.
349
00:12:18,231 --> 00:12:19,482
MAYBE IF YOU DIDN'T
STOMP DOWN THE HALL
350
00:12:19,566 --> 00:12:22,318
WITH THOSE
MASSIVE SADDLE SHOES
351
00:12:22,402 --> 00:12:24,946
THIS LITTLE "ACCIDENT"
COULD HAVE BEEN AVOIDED.
352
00:12:25,029 --> 00:12:25,613
NOT ANOTHER WORD.
353
00:12:25,697 --> 00:12:28,241
STEP OFF,
YOU BIG NEANDERTHAL.
354
00:12:28,324 --> 00:12:29,576
( gasps )
355
00:12:29,659 --> 00:12:31,327
Kids ( chanting ):
FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!
356
00:12:31,411 --> 00:12:32,662
Wartz:
LADIES, THIS TYPE
357
00:12:32,745 --> 00:12:34,664
OF IMPROPER FISTICUFF
CATFIGHTING
358
00:12:34,747 --> 00:12:36,416
IS A SERIOUS BREECH
OF SCHOOL POLICY.
359
00:12:36,499 --> 00:12:38,710
I'LL HAVE TO NOTIFY
YOUR PARENTS.
360
00:12:39,711 --> 00:12:43,298
Rhonda:
THE GIRL
THRASHES MY BOOT.
361
00:12:43,381 --> 00:12:45,925
THE NEXT THING I KNOW,
SHE'S GOING TO POUND ME.
362
00:12:46,009 --> 00:12:47,385
IT WAS SIMPLY BARBARIC.
363
00:12:47,469 --> 00:12:50,013
WE COULDN'T AGREE MORE, DEAR.
364
00:12:50,096 --> 00:12:51,848
SO WE'VE DECIDED
TO SEND YOU
365
00:12:51,931 --> 00:12:55,351
TO THE YOUNG SOPHISTICATE
AFTER-SCHOOL POLISHING ACADEMY
366
00:12:55,435 --> 00:12:57,270
FOR BOYS AND GIRLS.
367
00:12:57,353 --> 00:12:58,730
ALL THE LLOYDS HAVE ATTENDED.
368
00:12:58,813 --> 00:13:00,607
THOUGH TRADITIONALLY,
FAMILY MEMBERS
369
00:13:00,690 --> 00:13:02,400
HAVE ENROLLED IN
THE SIXTH GRADE, WE THOUGHT...
370
00:13:02,484 --> 00:13:04,611
CONSIDERING
THE CIRCUMSTANCES
371
00:13:04,694 --> 00:13:06,571
THAT YOU SHOULD START
RIGHT AWAY.
372
00:13:06,654 --> 00:13:09,699
IT'S HIGH TIME YOU WERE
AROUND OTHERS
373
00:13:09,782 --> 00:13:11,367
MORE LIKE YOURSELF,
DARLING.
374
00:13:11,451 --> 00:13:12,660
THANK YOU, MOMMY.
375
00:13:12,744 --> 00:13:13,912
THANK YOU, DADDY.
376
00:13:13,995 --> 00:13:15,830
GROUP HUG.
377
00:13:15,914 --> 00:13:17,040
( all moan )
378
00:13:17,123 --> 00:13:19,209
Woman:
TO BE PERFECTLY HONEST,
PUMPKIN
379
00:13:19,292 --> 00:13:22,253
YOUR FATHER AND I ARE WORRIED
ABOUT YOUR...
380
00:13:22,337 --> 00:13:24,631
WELL, THE WAY YOU DON'T
ALWAYS GET ALONG
381
00:13:24,714 --> 00:13:25,381
WITH YOUR CLASSMATES.
382
00:13:25,465 --> 00:13:26,841
AFTER ALL, GUMDROP
383
00:13:26,925 --> 00:13:30,595
YOU'VE BEEN IN QUITE A FEW
SQUABBLES THIS SEMESTER.
384
00:13:30,678 --> 00:13:33,056
Mother:
AND YOU DON'T SEEM
TO HAVE MANY FRIENDS.
385
00:13:33,139 --> 00:13:34,891
AND SO, WE'VE DECIDED
TO SIGN YOU UP
386
00:13:34,974 --> 00:13:38,394
FOR THE YOUNG SOPHISTICATE
AFTER-SCHOOL POLISHING ACADEMY
387
00:13:38,478 --> 00:13:40,897
FOR BOYS AND GIRLS.
388
00:13:40,980 --> 00:13:43,816
THE BROCHURE SAYS
IT'LL HELP SOCIALLY
ACTIVATE YOU.
389
00:13:43,900 --> 00:13:45,902
WOULDN'T YOU LIKE
THAT, MUFFIN?
390
00:13:45,985 --> 00:13:47,570
I GUESS.
391
00:13:49,405 --> 00:13:52,575
( kids chatting )
392
00:13:52,659 --> 00:13:55,912
NOW, THESE ARE
MY KIND OF PEOPLE.
393
00:13:55,995 --> 00:13:57,872
EXCUSE ME.
394
00:13:57,956 --> 00:14:00,833
YOU... WHAT IN THE WORLD
ARE YOU DOING HERE?
395
00:14:01,834 --> 00:14:03,419
NEVER MIND.
396
00:14:03,503 --> 00:14:06,714
JUST STAY AS FAR
AWAY FROM ME AS
HUMANLY POSSIBLE.
397
00:14:06,798 --> 00:14:07,840
NO PROBLEM.
398
00:14:07,924 --> 00:14:09,592
Woman:
WELCOME, BOYS
AND GIRLS.
399
00:14:09,676 --> 00:14:11,594
I AM YOUR INSTRUCTOR,
MADAME PARVENU.
400
00:14:11,678 --> 00:14:15,390
TODAY YOU COME TO ME
MERE CHILDREN.
401
00:14:15,473 --> 00:14:17,725
IN JUST FOUR SHORT WEEKS
402
00:14:17,809 --> 00:14:22,272
YOU WILL EMERGE CIVILIZED,
CULTURED LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.
403
00:14:22,355 --> 00:14:24,274
I WANT YOU TO SPREAD OUT
AND PRETEND
404
00:14:24,357 --> 00:14:25,942
THAT YOU ARE AT A PARTY.
405
00:14:26,025 --> 00:14:27,485
NOW, WHEN I CALL YOUR NAME,
YOU ARE TO CROSS THE ROOM
406
00:14:27,569 --> 00:14:30,280
AND POUR YOURSELF
A GLASS OF PUNCH.
407
00:14:30,363 --> 00:14:31,114
SIMPLE, NON?
408
00:14:31,197 --> 00:14:34,450
VERY WELL, LET'S BEGIN
WITH RHONDA LLOYD.
409
00:14:35,118 --> 00:14:37,245
HELLO?
410
00:14:37,328 --> 00:14:39,831
DO YOU THINK YOU COULD
GET OUT OF MY WAY?
411
00:14:42,208 --> 00:14:44,335
AND NOW... PATTY SMITH.
412
00:14:45,253 --> 00:14:46,629
PARDON ME.
413
00:14:46,713 --> 00:14:47,922
EXCUSE ME, PLEASE.
414
00:14:48,798 --> 00:14:51,968
ALL RIGHT, RHONDA,
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS
415
00:14:52,051 --> 00:14:54,178
PRETEND THAT YOU ARE
AT A TEA PARTY.
416
00:14:54,262 --> 00:14:55,847
A TEA PARTY? GREAT.
417
00:14:55,930 --> 00:14:57,849
BECAUSE I JUST LOVE TEA PARTIES
418
00:14:57,932 --> 00:15:00,184
BUT ONLY IF THERE'S
THE RIGHT SANDWICH.
419
00:15:00,268 --> 00:15:03,313
I MEAN, IF IT'S NOT CUT
INTO A PERFECT LITTLE TRIANGLE
420
00:15:03,396 --> 00:15:05,023
IT SIMPLY WILL NOT DO.
421
00:15:05,106 --> 00:15:06,691
WOULD YOU LIKE
MORE TEA, PATTY?
422
00:15:06,774 --> 00:15:07,483
NO, THANKS-- HOW ABOUT YOU?
423
00:15:07,567 --> 00:15:09,944
YOU WANT ANOTHER CUP?
424
00:15:10,028 --> 00:15:11,738
ME? WHY, ACTUALLY I WOULD.
425
00:15:11,821 --> 00:15:13,531
THANK YOU FOR ASKING.
426
00:15:13,615 --> 00:15:15,533
BROWNNOSER.
427
00:15:15,617 --> 00:15:18,328
THIS IS MY ONE-OF-A-KIND
CAPRINI PLATFORM BOOT.
428
00:15:18,411 --> 00:15:20,663
I USED TO HAVE TWO OF THEM.
429
00:15:20,747 --> 00:15:24,042
ANYWAY, IT COST A TON OF MONEY,
SO I'M SURE THAT, YOU KNOW
430
00:15:24,125 --> 00:15:27,378
EVEN WITHOUT THE OTHER ONE,
IT'S STILL WORTH SOMETHING.
431
00:15:27,462 --> 00:15:28,338
THANK YOU, RHONDA.
432
00:15:28,421 --> 00:15:30,548
NOW, WHO ELSE IS READY
TO PRESENT THEIR ITEM
433
00:15:30,632 --> 00:15:33,301
OF PERSONAL VALUE
TO THE CLASS?
434
00:15:33,384 --> 00:15:36,554
MY MOM AND I MADE THESE SOCKS
TOGETHER LAST WINTER.
435
00:15:36,638 --> 00:15:38,514
I GUESS THAT MAKES THEM
KIND OF SPECIAL.
436
00:15:38,598 --> 00:15:40,558
SPECIAL? YOU'VE GOT
TO BE KIDDING.
437
00:15:40,642 --> 00:15:42,935
THANK YOU, REX,
THANK YOU, PEPE.
438
00:15:43,019 --> 00:15:46,522
NOW, CLASS, BEFORE YOU GO,
I'D LIKE TO DISTRIBUTE
439
00:15:46,606 --> 00:15:48,608
YOUR PRELIMINARY
PERFORMANCE EVALUATIONS.
440
00:15:48,691 --> 00:15:50,318
THE PURPOSE IS
TO LET YOU KNOW
441
00:15:50,401 --> 00:15:51,486
HOW YOU'RE DOING
IN MY CLASS THUS FAR.
442
00:15:51,569 --> 00:15:55,323
REX, ARCHER, PATTY.
443
00:15:55,406 --> 00:15:59,952
"PATTY SMITH: COURTEOUS,
A GOOD LISTENER, PRACTICAL."
444
00:16:00,036 --> 00:16:02,580
...MILLICENT, RHONDA.
445
00:16:02,664 --> 00:16:03,998
( gasps )
446
00:16:04,082 --> 00:16:06,042
Rhonda:
"PUSHY, SELF-OBSESSED...
447
00:16:06,125 --> 00:16:07,710
AND MATERIALISTIC."
448
00:16:07,794 --> 00:16:08,878
MADAME, THIS IS
AN OUTRAGE.
449
00:16:08,961 --> 00:16:09,754
THERE MUST BE SOME MISTAKE.
450
00:16:09,837 --> 00:16:12,757
NO, I AM AFRAID
THAT THERE IS NOT.
451
00:16:12,840 --> 00:16:14,592
BUT DON'T YOU KNOW WHO I AM?
452
00:16:14,676 --> 00:16:17,303
I'M A LLOYD,
AND LLOYDS HAVE
BEEN ATTENDING--
453
00:16:17,387 --> 00:16:19,555
NOT TO MENTION
DONATING MONEY TO--
454
00:16:19,639 --> 00:16:20,848
THIS ACADEMY
FOR GENERATIONS.
455
00:16:20,932 --> 00:16:24,352
I AM SORRY, MISS LLOYD,
BUT TIMES HAVE CHANGED
456
00:16:24,435 --> 00:16:25,728
AND SO HAS THIS ACADEMY.
457
00:16:25,812 --> 00:16:29,065
I AM AFRAID YOUR
HERITAGE WILL NOT
EXCUSE YOUR...
458
00:16:29,148 --> 00:16:31,567
LESS-THAN-PERFECT PERFORMANCE
IN MY CLASSROOM.
459
00:16:31,651 --> 00:16:34,404
NOW, UNLESS YOU WANT TO
FAIL THIS COURSE ENTIRELY...
460
00:16:34,487 --> 00:16:35,488
FAIL? BUT I CAN'T FAIL.
461
00:16:35,571 --> 00:16:37,573
IT WOULD BE...
UNHEARD OF.
462
00:16:37,657 --> 00:16:41,160
I'D DISGRACE
MY ENTIRE FAMILY.
463
00:16:41,244 --> 00:16:43,538
THEN I SUGGEST
YOU GET IT TOGETHER
464
00:16:43,621 --> 00:16:46,874
AND ADJUST THAT ATTITUDE
OF YOURS IMMEDIATELY.
465
00:16:50,336 --> 00:16:52,922
SO HOW ARE THINGS AT
THE ACADEMY, DEAR?
466
00:16:53,005 --> 00:16:53,881
HUH? THE ACADEMY?
467
00:16:53,965 --> 00:16:57,719
OH, GREAT--
THINGS ARE GOING
JUST GREAT.
468
00:16:57,802 --> 00:16:59,971
I'LL PROBABLY GRADUATE
FIRST IN MY CLASS.
469
00:17:00,054 --> 00:17:01,723
Buckley:
WELL, THAT IS
470
00:17:01,806 --> 00:17:03,307
JUST FANTABULOUS, HONEY.
471
00:17:03,391 --> 00:17:06,602
TODAY THE YOUNG SOPHISTICATE
AFTER-SCHOOL POLISHING ACADEMY
472
00:17:06,686 --> 00:17:08,312
FOR BOYS AND GIRLS;
473
00:17:08,396 --> 00:17:09,439
TOMORROW, PRINCETON.
474
00:17:09,522 --> 00:17:13,192
PRINCETON... YEAH.
475
00:17:13,276 --> 00:17:14,652
Patty:
WELL, I ALWAYS CARRY
476
00:17:14,736 --> 00:17:17,572
HEAVY GROCERIES
FOR MY MOM
477
00:17:17,655 --> 00:17:20,742
AND... OH, YEAH, SOMETIMES I
VOLUNTEER AT HOMELESS SHELTERS.
478
00:17:20,825 --> 00:17:22,618
WHAT A WONDERFUL
ANSWER, PATTY.
479
00:17:22,702 --> 00:17:23,786
YOU ARE A VERY HELPFUL
PERSON, INDEED.
480
00:17:23,870 --> 00:17:27,915
PERHAPS EVEN
VALEDICTORIAN MATERIAL.
481
00:17:27,999 --> 00:17:31,294
THIS IS SO UNBELIEVABLE.
482
00:17:31,377 --> 00:17:32,920
I'M GOING TO FAIL
483
00:17:33,004 --> 00:17:37,300
AND BIG PATTY IS GOING TO
GRADUATE FIRST IN THE CLASS?
484
00:17:37,383 --> 00:17:40,803
IF ONLY... IF ONLY I COULD
SOMEHOW BE MORE LIKE PATTY.
485
00:17:40,887 --> 00:17:41,471
BUT HOW?
486
00:17:41,554 --> 00:17:43,681
( bell gongs )
487
00:17:43,765 --> 00:17:46,309
AND, WELL, WHAT
I WAS THINKING WAS
488
00:17:46,392 --> 00:17:48,144
IF YOU WANTED, WE
COULD GET TOGETHER
489
00:17:48,227 --> 00:17:51,147
AND YOU COULD, WELL,
YOU KNOW, SHOW ME
YOUR TECHNIQUE.
490
00:17:51,230 --> 00:17:52,565
I DON'T THINK SO.
491
00:17:52,648 --> 00:17:54,233
COME ON, PATTY, PLEASE.
492
00:17:54,317 --> 00:17:56,027
YOU'VE JUST GOT
TO HELP ME.
493
00:17:56,110 --> 00:17:56,819
FINALS ARE IN TWO WEEKS.
494
00:17:56,903 --> 00:17:58,696
AND IF I DON'T PASS
POLISHING SCHOOL
495
00:17:58,780 --> 00:18:01,449
MY PARENTS WILL TOTALLY FREAK.
496
00:18:01,532 --> 00:18:03,367
THEY'LL SO COMPLETELY DISOWN ME.
497
00:18:03,451 --> 00:18:06,079
I'LL BE A SOCIAL
OUTCAST, A LOSER
498
00:18:06,162 --> 00:18:09,332
AND THEN I'LL NEVER
GET INTO PRINCETON,
EVER.
499
00:18:09,415 --> 00:18:11,167
SO PLEASE,
PATTY, HELP ME
500
00:18:11,250 --> 00:18:11,876
PLEASE.
501
00:18:11,959 --> 00:18:13,669
WELL, OKAY, I GUESS
502
00:18:13,753 --> 00:18:17,590
IF YOU'RE
THAT DESPERATE.
503
00:18:19,425 --> 00:18:21,677
OKAY, PRINCESS,
HERE'S HOW IT WORKS.
504
00:18:21,761 --> 00:18:25,014
I POUR THE TEA AND YOU ASK ME
A QUESTION ABOUT MYSELF, GOT IT?
505
00:18:25,097 --> 00:18:26,182
GOT IT.
506
00:18:26,265 --> 00:18:28,142
WHERE ON EARTH
DID YOU GET THIS CUP?
507
00:18:28,226 --> 00:18:29,644
IT'S CHIPPED.
508
00:18:29,727 --> 00:18:33,105
RHONDA, I THINK YOU'RE MISSING
THE POINT OF THE EXERCISE.
509
00:18:33,189 --> 00:18:35,191
AND HOW AM I SUPPOSED
TO GET PUNCH
510
00:18:35,274 --> 00:18:36,901
WITH YOU JUST
STANDING THERE?
511
00:18:36,984 --> 00:18:38,861
TRY SAYING
THE MAGIC WORD.
512
00:18:38,945 --> 00:18:39,737
"MOVE"?
513
00:18:40,905 --> 00:18:42,365
TELL ME AGAIN
514
00:18:42,448 --> 00:18:45,076
BECAUSE I SWEAR I
JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND
515
00:18:45,159 --> 00:18:47,537
WHY ANYONE WOULD
ACTUALLY WANT TO
MAKE A SOCK.
516
00:18:47,620 --> 00:18:50,373
JUST TAKE THESE, RHONDA.
517
00:18:50,456 --> 00:18:53,876
AND HE'S ALL, "F.Y.I., YOU'RE
NOT THE BEST-DRESSED GIRL
518
00:18:53,960 --> 00:18:55,378
IN SCHOOL."
519
00:18:55,461 --> 00:18:57,672
AND I'M ALL,
"YEAH, RIGHT, WHATEVER."
520
00:18:57,755 --> 00:19:00,091
OH, NO, I'M DOING IT AGAIN,
AREN'T I?
521
00:19:00,174 --> 00:19:01,968
I'M TALKING TOO MUCH.
522
00:19:03,803 --> 00:19:04,428
EXCUSE ME.
523
00:19:04,512 --> 00:19:05,930
WHAT?
524
00:19:06,013 --> 00:19:10,184
I SAID THE MAGIC WORD,
DIDN'T I?
525
00:19:10,268 --> 00:19:11,519
VOILA! IT'S PERFECT.
526
00:19:11,602 --> 00:19:13,855
( giggles )
527
00:19:13,938 --> 00:19:15,398
AND WHAT IS
SO FUNNY?
528
00:19:15,481 --> 00:19:17,024
NOTHING.
529
00:19:17,108 --> 00:19:19,569
IT'S JUST... WELL, WHEN YOU
ASKED ME TO HELP YOU OUT
530
00:19:19,652 --> 00:19:20,820
I REALLY DIDN'T
WANT TO
531
00:19:20,903 --> 00:19:22,488
BECAUSE I THOUGHT
IT WOULD BE A PAIN.
532
00:19:22,572 --> 00:19:23,030
BUT NOW...
533
00:19:23,114 --> 00:19:24,031
IT'S JUST SORT OF FUNNY
534
00:19:24,115 --> 00:19:26,784
HOW WE KIND OF
HIT IT OFF, ISN'T IT?
535
00:19:26,868 --> 00:19:29,078
YEAH, IT'S FUNNY.
536
00:19:29,912 --> 00:19:31,581
WELL, IF THERE'S
NOTHING ELSE
537
00:19:31,664 --> 00:19:32,623
I NEED TO KNOW
FOR TOMORROW'S FINAL
538
00:19:32,707 --> 00:19:34,292
I REALLY OUGHT
TO BE GOING.
539
00:19:37,628 --> 00:19:38,421
HEY, RHONDA.
540
00:19:38,504 --> 00:19:39,589
OH, HEY, ARNOLD.
541
00:19:39,672 --> 00:19:40,923
SINCE WHEN DID YOU AND
PATTY BECOME FRIENDS?
542
00:19:41,007 --> 00:19:43,342
OH, ARNOLD, PATTY AND I
ARE NOT FRIENDS.
543
00:19:43,426 --> 00:19:47,471
I'M JUST GETTING HER TO HELP ME
WITH SOME SCHOOLWORK.
544
00:19:47,555 --> 00:19:49,765
PATTY AND ME
FRIENDS... PLEASE.
545
00:19:49,849 --> 00:19:51,726
THAT'S RIDICULOUS.
546
00:19:55,646 --> 00:19:56,564
VERY NICE, REX.
547
00:19:56,647 --> 00:19:58,274
AND NOW, RHONDA LLOYD.
548
00:20:01,027 --> 00:20:02,653
EXCUSE ME, PLEASE,
MADAME.
549
00:20:05,364 --> 00:20:08,117
RHONDA, WHY DON'T YOU
TELL ME SOMETHING ABOUT
YOURSELF.
550
00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:09,619
OH, ENOUGH ABOUT ME.
551
00:20:09,702 --> 00:20:12,371
I'M MUCH MORE INTERESTED
IN HEARING ABOUT YOU.
552
00:20:13,998 --> 00:20:15,374
I MADE IT MYSELF.
553
00:20:15,458 --> 00:20:18,836
IT'S UNCANNY HOW WELL
IT MATCHES MY OUTFIT, NON?
554
00:20:21,213 --> 00:20:21,589
Rhonda:
BYE-BYE, ARCHER.
555
00:20:21,672 --> 00:20:23,549
ADIEU, BRITTANY.
556
00:20:23,633 --> 00:20:24,967
SEE YOU AT GRADUATION.
557
00:20:25,051 --> 00:20:26,469
HEY, RHONDA, WAIT UP.
558
00:20:26,552 --> 00:20:28,596
BEFORE YOU GO,
I WANTED TO ASK YOU
559
00:20:28,679 --> 00:20:30,306
IF YOU AREN'T BUSY
THIS WEEKEND
560
00:20:30,389 --> 00:20:32,475
DO YOU WANT TO COME
SLEEP OVER AT MY HOUSE?
561
00:20:32,558 --> 00:20:34,602
SLEEP OVER?
562
00:20:34,685 --> 00:20:37,146
YEAH, MY PARENTS ALREADY SAID
IT WAS OKAY.
563
00:20:37,229 --> 00:20:39,315
LOOK, PATTY, I REALLY APPRECIATE
564
00:20:39,398 --> 00:20:40,608
YOU HELPING ME OUT
565
00:20:40,691 --> 00:20:42,944
WITH ALL THIS
POLISHING SCHOOL
STUFF AND ALL
566
00:20:43,027 --> 00:20:46,864
BUT AFTER TODAY, YOU KNOW,
SINCE FINALS ARE OVER
567
00:20:46,948 --> 00:20:48,991
WE PROBABLY SHOULDN'T
HANG OUT ANYMORE.
568
00:20:49,075 --> 00:20:51,035
YOU UNDERSTAND,
DON'T YOU?
569
00:20:52,286 --> 00:20:55,122
YEAH, SURE.
570
00:20:56,958 --> 00:20:59,877
AND NOW, THIS YEAR'S
ACADEMY VALEDICTORIAN
571
00:20:59,961 --> 00:21:02,713
MISS RHONDA WELLINGTON LLOYD.
572
00:21:02,797 --> 00:21:05,049
( applause )
573
00:21:05,132 --> 00:21:06,842
THANK YOU, MADAME PARVENU.
574
00:21:06,926 --> 00:21:10,346
I WOULDN'T BE HERE TODAY WITHOUT
YOUR FABULOUS TEACHING SKILLS
575
00:21:10,429 --> 00:21:14,183
AND, OF COURSE,
MY WELL-ROUNDED UPBRINGING.
576
00:21:17,061 --> 00:21:20,022
WE'RE SO PROUD
OF YOU, SWEET PEA.
577
00:21:20,106 --> 00:21:21,816
WE'RE HAPPY
YOU'VE MADE A FRIEND.
578
00:21:21,899 --> 00:21:23,693
SO WHEN'S THE BIG SLEEP-OVER?
579
00:21:23,776 --> 00:21:25,861
I DON'T KNOW.
580
00:21:25,945 --> 00:21:27,697
I HAVEN'T ASKED HER YET.
581
00:21:30,116 --> 00:21:31,575
GREAT SPEECH, HON.
582
00:21:31,659 --> 00:21:33,369
ABSOLUTELY.
583
00:21:33,452 --> 00:21:35,037
HOW ABOUT WE GO OUT
AND CELEBRATE
584
00:21:35,121 --> 00:21:36,706
WITH SOME
MOCHA LATTES?
585
00:21:36,789 --> 00:21:37,540
MOCHA LATTES?
586
00:21:37,623 --> 00:21:39,417
SOUNDS DELISH.
587
00:21:42,461 --> 00:21:44,797
I GOT IT AS A POLISHING ACADEMY
GRADUATION PRESENT.
588
00:21:44,880 --> 00:21:49,385
IT COST A TON OF MONEY.
589
00:21:51,512 --> 00:21:54,682
DID I MENTION
THAT I WAS VALEDICTORIAN?
590
00:21:56,559 --> 00:21:57,309
CHECK OUT MY NEW
COWBOY BOOTS.
591
00:22:00,146 --> 00:22:04,817
( kids laughing )
592
00:22:04,900 --> 00:22:05,568
SORRY.
593
00:22:05,651 --> 00:22:07,528
SORRY?!
594
00:22:07,611 --> 00:22:09,447
THESE ARE BRAND-NEW
COWBOY BOOTS.
595
00:22:09,530 --> 00:22:11,282
IT WAS JUST
AN ACCIDENT.
596
00:22:11,365 --> 00:22:13,826
YEAH? WELL, NEXT TIME,
WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING
597
00:22:13,909 --> 00:22:14,702
YOU BIG DOOF.
598
00:22:17,121 --> 00:22:20,416
HEY, PRINCESS,
MY FRIEND SAID
SHE WAS SORRY.
599
00:22:20,499 --> 00:22:21,584
EXCUSE ME?
600
00:22:21,667 --> 00:22:22,585
YOU HEARD ME.
601
00:22:22,668 --> 00:22:23,627
WHILE YOU'RE AT IT
602
00:22:23,711 --> 00:22:26,547
YOU CAN APOLOGIZE
FOR BEING SO RUDE
603
00:22:26,630 --> 00:22:28,257
AND SO TOTALLY
SELF-ABSORBED
604
00:22:28,340 --> 00:22:29,592
UNLESS YOU WANT
THIS FIST FOR LUNCH.
605
00:22:29,675 --> 00:22:31,552
SORRY.
606
00:22:31,635 --> 00:22:32,970
NOW, HOW ABOUT YOU
607
00:22:33,054 --> 00:22:36,015
AND THOSE TACKY FARM BOOTS
OF YOURS TAKE A WALK?
608
00:22:36,098 --> 00:22:37,850
HMM.
609
00:22:37,933 --> 00:22:39,018
OH, GOSH.
610
00:22:39,101 --> 00:22:40,061
COME ON, PATTY.
611
00:22:40,144 --> 00:22:41,145
I SEE A TABLE
OVER THERE.
612
00:22:41,228 --> 00:22:43,522
SO ABOUT THAT
SLUMBER PARTY
613
00:22:43,606 --> 00:22:46,317
I WAS THINKING...
SATURDAY NIGHT?
614
00:22:50,613 --> 00:22:54,325
[Captioning sponsored by THE
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
615
00:22:54,408 --> 00:22:56,786
and NICKELODEON
42367
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