All language subtitles for 2DB0317AECF1F5F24088E63E86244124_eng (LAGGIES)

Hey.

Hey, sleepy head. Good morning.

Oh, wow.

I shot these on Tuesday.

They were such
an amazing couple.

They were so open
to all of my ideas.

Great. Where is that?

Over in Seattle. We had to
go near the shipyards though

so we could get
something a little more edgy.

'Cause I mean,
look at that wall.

Yeah.

Hey, weren't you supposed to go

to that career counselor today?

Yeah.

Yeah? You should...

Yeah. Yeah, okay.
I'll go get ready.

Good.

Hello, is somebody there?

It's me, you don't
have to come out.

What's this?

What's what? I'm just
gonna watch some TV.

Megan, I don't think
I like this new habit.

I spoke with Anthony,

and he said you were meeting
with the career counselor today.

My God, I know exactly
what she's going to say.

It's just a waste of time.

Megan, honey, I don't want to
see you throw away your education.

You have an advanced degree.

I know. And your
father should have

never given you that
stupid job because now...

Is that my girl?

Hey, what are you doing home?

It's his home.

Taking the day off.

Yeah, me too. Hmm.

Wanna stay for dinner?

Yeah. Ed.

Hey, is it "make your
own pizza" night?

Sure, great idea. Great idea.

Yeah.

I promise to love you, to
cherish you and to hold you

and to be the rock in our
relationship for the rest of our days.

I promise to be your baby's
breath when we wake each morning.

And to be your evening rose

at day's end.

And I promise to
be your safe harbor

when the boat is rocking
and when it's not rocking.

I give you the bride and the
groom, Mr. and Mrs. Wanamaker!

And here they are

dancing to the song
Mrs. Wannamaker

has picked for their
first dance together

as man and wife.

My dad used to
make yipping sounds

when I first started
to take you out

because he said
it was puppy love.

I know. I remember.

Yeah, well, you know,
but it wasn't puppy love.

No... I mean, unless we stayed
puppies for a seriously long time.

Listen...

What?

Look...

I know it's taken me a
really long time to get here.

What are you talking about?

Okay, well, you know how I took
that guy's seminar last month?

Right.

Well, I took a personality test.

And the test came back
and the type that I am...

Is a procrastinator.
Anth, I mean...

Who makes up
those tests? Come on.

Experts. Right.

Like really smart people...

But that's not important.

What's important is that
I've been such a bonehead

in waiting to do
this for so long.

No, no! Whoa, get up, get up!

Okay. Get up...

Okay, I'm up, and listen, I know

we have had our
trouble in the past

with recognizing our
moments, but this is it.

This is our moment.

No, this isn't our moment,

this is Allison's moment,
this is her wedding.

I know, and it's totally cool.

When I first had the
idea, I ran it by her

and she was so happy for us.

And today, at lunch,

I got a fortune cookie
that said, "Carpe diem."

Carpe diem? Yes.

Hey, hey, guys, hey.
Megan, can you find my mom?

She has the next
dance with Matt.

I think I saw her
out in the garden.

Yeah, I'm... I'm... I'm
gonna come... I'm...

I'm just a second... Right.

Sorry but she has
to find my mom.

No, it's fine. Okay.

It's fine.

Uh, I'm going to go and put
the rose petals in the bridal suite.

Right this second? Yeah.

Don't you do that
just before they leave?

No, no, it's cool right now.

Okay, I'll... Later
right? Later.

Meg?

Meg...

Hey, excuse me.

Yeah?

You look like you party.

I guess I'm technically
coming from one.

Cool. So...

We can hardly believe
this, but we all forgot our ID's.

And I mean, normally we would
just go buy some beer ourselves...

But I guess we look under
21. Which is crazy, right?

I know. Um, so...

If we gave you some
money or something,

would you help us straighten
this whole problem out

and just buy us a
six-pack or something?

Oh, God.

Um, you could totally
keep the change.

Okay.

Someone did this for
me when I was your age,

so I'm going to do it for you.

It's like a rite of
passage, right?

Yeah.

Yeah, I... I had a
good feeling about you.

That makes one of us.

Hey, yo, can we get
some coolers too?

And some red wine.

And can you get some
white wine also? Thank you.

You don't have to
get all that. Thank you.

Yeah!

Here you go. Drink responsibly.

Sweet.

Okay, I'm out of here.
Goodnight, you guys.

I'm really sorry. Can I have
a look at that for a second?

Yeah go for it.

Okay.

Almost.

God, I haven't done this
since I was in eighth grade.

Okay, okay, one more
time and then I'm going.

Okay, all right,
thank you so much.

Come on, where are you going?

Hang out some more.

Come on, stay.

I mean, maybe I've got an hour.

Yeah.

What are you up to?

- Guys, I'm really impressed.
- This is truly art.

Oh.

Oh. Okay.

Come on, Megan.

Go right now, go.

Shit.

Shit.

You know when you go to a party
drunk, and everybody else is sober.

Or no. Or maybe like,

maybe you're the sober one
and everybody else is drunk.

God, you'd think that somebody
who you've known for forever

would have known what
you meant about nipples,

and it's like, hey, hey,

maybe like, using Buddha
as a restaurant decoration

is the bigger joke, right?

Or maybe...

Maybe actually they're the
ones that are telling the jokes

and I'm the one that's
missing them. You know?

It makes me really
sad what you're saying.

It's sad...

I don't even know what
you're talking about but still...

Oh.

Don't get sad, Misty.

I'm fine. I'm fine.

No, no, like, you shouldn't
get drunk and get sad.

I mean, look at Patrick.

Patrick's sad and he hasn't
even touched his wine.

His folks are splitting up.

His dad's being a
massive dick in the divorce.

Oh.

That's why we TP'd his house.

That was his house?

Yeah.

Huh?

So you don't want
to go out together

as friends then?

Just take the sophomore.

You know, just take a real date.

All right, whatever
Annika. Whatever you want.

I'm sorry. I just... I
totally interrupted.

What, me and Junior?

No, we were just talking about
the prom. You know, stupid stuff.

I saw my dad cheat
on my mom tonight.

Really?

I think he was about
to get a hand job.

Yeah, my...

My mom left my dad and I,
like, seven years ago now.

It was out of nowhere.

We don't know why she did it.

You know why your dad did it?

I don't.

Well...

If you ever want to talk,

call me.

You're giving me a phone?

I have a bunch of them.

Misty's dad sells them.

I just pretty much just use that
one to hide stuff from my dad.

Thanks.

God, I don't even
know what time it is.

How do I, um... Oh, no...

This one?

Oh, shit.

Shit, shit, shit, shit.

Bye, thanks for
the awesome time.

Megan, what happened to
you? Where have you been?

I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.

I, uh... I...

I... You know, I was more wasted

leaving the wedding
than I knew...

Okay. And by the
time I got to the store,

I realized I shouldn't
even be driving.

And then I got sick and I
was puking in some bushes,

and then my dress got dirty,

and then I had to leave the
car there and take a cab here.

And now I'm back.

I thought you got upset about,

we'll call it the kneeling,

and that you didn't
come back on purpose,

but that didn't seem like you.

No, no, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I got
scared, I'm sorry.

I just... I don't know.

Oh, God, I'm a
mess right now, look,

can we... Can we talk
about this tomorrow?

Well...

Well, baby, no...

No? No.

We can't. Right.

Because we have
wasted so much time...

We should have
just made it official

and our time is now.

I know why you're hesitant.

Why?

It's the planning
and the pressure

and all the
trappings of all that.

But we don't have
to do it that way.

No?

No, because we...

We can elope.

I was thinking.

We don't have
to tell our parents,

we don't have
to tell our friends.

Really?

We could go to a beach or Vegas.

I was thinking Vegas

'cause we could just
check that step off

and we could be
married tomorrow.

Would you do that?
Would you do that?

Yes. I would do that.

Okay. I would do that.

Wow, we have Matt and
Allison's brunch tomorrow.

But we can do it the day after.

We can go the
day after tomorrow.

Yeah.

I can't the day after that.

What do you mean, why? Why?

My God, I really wanted to...

To go to that personal
development seminar.

Wait, really? Yeah.

On Orcas?

Yeah, right.

Ah, because, you know...

I'm twirling a sign for my dad,

and I don't know what
to do with my future.

That's awesome, Meg.

Yeah.

I'm so all for that.

That's amazing. You know...

They do this thing where they
give you an animal to help you

visualize new
behavioral patterns.

And mine was a shark.

And it helped to remind me
that I need to keep progressing,

otherwise I'll just sink.

Yeah, so...

After your seminar on Orcas...

Uh...

Will you...

Megan Burch...

Run off to Vegas with me?

Yes, I will.

You will.

There it goes.

I love you.

I love you.

Mmm-hmm.

I love you so much.

I love you so much.

What happened to you last night?

I'm so sorry. I got sick.

Sick?

She had a few too many drinks
and ended up vomiting in a parking lot.

I'm sorry.

Why would you
possibly drink that much?

Now you are not in
any of the table pictures.

You are missing from the video.

Megan Ashley Burch...

You had everyone scared to
death. Where the hell have you been?

I got sick.

Oh. She said she got sick.

I just, uh...

I just need to... I've got
to go and do something.

It's okay, baby.

Hon.

I was just leaving. Wait...

What's going on with you?

What's going on with me? Yeah.

I saw you.

I saw you.

So right now I don't
even want to look at you.

Let's just quietly talk
about this for a second.

Talk about what? I'm
sorry, talk about what?

I don't know.

People grow together, they
grow apart. It's always shifting.

Oh, right. Three decades
of marriage to Mom

and you're going to describe
what I saw as shifting?

Wait.

Hey. You okay?

Yeah.

Okay. Savannah and Theo

want to talk to us. About what?

I don't know. Come here. Okay.

Oh, good, there you are. So...

Theo and I have
been talking it over

and even though you guys
aren't technically married...

You know, you're doing
the whole Goldie Hawn thing.

You know, you've been
together the longest

and you are young

and you are fun... So fun.

And, you know, if we're being
responsible, you're stable.

And what we
wanted to ask you is...

Is... Ready?

Would you be our
baby's godparents?

Whoa!

- Are you kidding?
- No.

Sure... Yeah, we would.

We would be honored.

See, I told you. Is it official?

You are looking at
Juppiter's godparents.

There they are. Juppiter?

Yeah, nobody has that name.

No one. Oddly.

I bet not.

Like the planet. Except
two "P's," two "P's."

You know, I think this is
going to be really good for me.

Me too.

It's like you're having your
bachelorette party but at a seminar.

Yeah.

Maybe you'll get a shark too.

Maybe.

All right, bye.

Drive safe.

Bye. Bye.

Hello?

Hey, what up? It's Annika.

Uh, huge emergency,

could you come down to my
school and pretend to be my mom?

Whoa, what?

Yeah, I'm supposed to have this
parent/teacher conference today,

but I threw the note out.

So my counselor said
she's gonna call my dad,

but he will be super pissy if
he has to come sit down here.

So I told them my mom
already knew about it

so basically my point is,
could you just come down here

and pretend to care about
me for like ten minutes?

I'll owe you,

and I know I already
owe you for the beer,

but I will really,
really owe you.

But, but I don't
look related to you.

Maybe I'm adopted. What
the fuck does she know?

Probably not much.

So will you come?

Hi.

My God, you
actually came through.

And you have the
fake wedding ring.

Nice touch.

Mrs. Hunter?

Hey.

Hello.

So, I'm becoming concerned that

Annika is not taking
steps towards her future.

Got it.

Well, I'll be sure to talk
to her about it at home.

So, we're good here?

Mrs. Hunter, I realize you
must have a very busy life. But...

I was hoping that we could
all come up with a plan today.

Okay, sure. A plan.
Do you have one?

Oh, uh...

I don't know. I mean...

It kind of seems stupid
to plan that far in advance

when you're just gonna
change your mind anyway, right?

I mean, say you had a kid,

and then you realize you
didn't really want the kid.

Was there a pregnancy?

No, she's talking
about her mom. Me.

Her mom.

And as her mom, I'd say that...

I'm sure it does
seem kind of stupid

to make some sort of rigid
plan for the future. But...

It's stupider not to start
paying attention to who you are

and what makes you happy.

Otherwise, you just float.

So...

There's the start of her plan.

Good meeting, Mrs. Halpsky.
You've given us a lot to think about.

Yes, well... Yes.

So this is kind of an
interesting job to have, huh?

What kind of
licensing does it take?

Are you questioning
my qualifications?

No. No. Never mind. I...

I was just curious. Come on.

You worked her over.

You can take that stuff off now,
you know. She totally bought it.

Remember half an hour ago
when you said you'd really owe me?

Holy shit. You collect fast.

I need to lay low for a
week. Your dad works, right?

So, my dad usually
comes home around 7:00,

but he's going to some lame,
divorcee mixer, so he'll be late.

This is the living room.

And this...

Ooh, this is Lynn.

Jesus Christ. Yeah...

My mom bought her when
she saw Finding Nemo

'cause she thought
that turtle was cute, but...

Then she realized that
this kind doesn't swim.

So she ditched you,
too, didn't she, Lynn?

You don't really have
to do anything for her.

Just don't step on her.
She likes to hide back here.

Do I need to feed her?

Um, you can try, but we're
pretty sure she's an anorexic.

Cool pet.

So, this is the kitchen. You can
basically eat whatever you want.

But this is his box of wine.

So if you have
some, use the funnel

with the Tupperware and fill
it up with a little bit of water.

It's what we do. I don't
think he really notices.

And tonight, this guy Dan
has invited some people over

'cause his parents
are out of town.

So if you want to
do that, we can do it.

And then we'll just
sneak you back in.

Okay.

And I'm using Humid. It's
a really gorgeous green.

Under. Yeah, on
the edge. All right.

You ready? Yeah.

You know, I always
wanted to try a smoky eye.

But I thought it might
be too much on me.

I don't know. I like it.

Hey!

Whoa! You're supposed to knock.

Write a letter. I
don't know you.

Megan. Craig.

She's a new friend.

You're supposed
to be at that mixer.

Yeah, well, I came home to
change so I don't look like a lawyer.

Wow.

High school students are looking

rougher and rougher these days.

Just graduated.

God, you can be rude sometimes.

Look, she's a new friend, okay?

We're just gonna
go to the movies.

Right well, let me know if
the teen vampire gets the girl.

And be home by
10. I know I'll be.

You know, why doesn't he just
stay out if he wants to be less lonely?

I don't know. Come on.

Is this turning into
a college party?

Where's the fucking
beer? This way?

Junior!

What's up? Hey.

Long time no see since Econ.

Yeah, that goes on
around him all night.

Yo. Yo, Annika!

Hey. Hey.

Oh, yeah, let's do this!

It's not a party till we start.

Who's gonna help
me get this going!

Here.

Yeah. This is definitely
having people over.

Oh, yeah. I've always
loved Neil Young.

I just discovered him.

Okay, I'm gonna
put the ice cube.

It's gonna be good.

Okay, on the count
of three. One...

Two!

Okay, girls. We need the hoop.

Come on. Hand it
over. Yeah, thank you.

Hey, I think it's past your
curfew, so we should probably go.

This is my mom.

Wow, that's your mom?

Yeah, she models
for catalogs now.

I've come across them before. I
don't even know who she is anymore.

You don't see her?

We did phone calls for a bit.

It didn't really last.

Do you know where she is?

There's an address. On the child
support check she sends my dad.

He puts them in a box
labeled, "No, thanks."

God, I'm sorry.

I'm really emotional tonight.

I was already
upset about Junior,

and then I came in
here, and I saw her.

You like him, huh?

Yeah.

I might even be
in love with him.

Wow.

Well, are you sure that
he doesn't like you, too?

Sure he does. As a friend.

Oh, right.

You know, he's
probably checking her tag

to see what cycle to wash it in.

Yeah.

Mmm-hmm.

Uh, Megan, can I borrow
your car keys for a second?

I think I left my
sweatshirt out there.

Yeah. Sweatshirt's
a really good idea.

Thanks.

You know...

When I was in high school,

there was a guy that
everyone said liked me.

It was all I heard
about from my friends.

But he never acted on it,
so I kept getting unsure.

Well, did he ever
do anything about it?

Yeah.

Sophomore year,
he asked me to be

his girlfriend in
front of everyone.

Oh... And did you like him?

Yeah. He was
cute. Kind of artsy.

He noticed these
details about the world

and talked about them in a way
that no other high school guy would.

And he was always...

He was always
taking pictures and...

Pulling quotes out of nowhere
which I thought was pretty deep.

But, but maybe it
was the start of a habit

of waiting for other people
to make decisions for me.

You know?

Okay.

Ooh, okay.

Okay. He's going
to be waiting inside

to do a whole deposition on me.

So just go straight to my
room and wait for me there.

You don't have to
take your shoes off.

Hey. Where you been?

Whoo! God! That
movie was so long.

Hi. Hey.

Did you find everything
you needed? Yeah.

Yeah? All right, cool.

Are you in trouble?

No. He just made me tell him
the plot to the movie we saw.

And then he read the
same plot to me back online

to see if it matched.

But I just told
him a movie I saw

last week when I ditched school.

Ah-ha!

Yeah. I didn't think you had
an interest in ventriloquism.

You. Downstairs.
We need to talk.

I'm sorry.

It's not your fault.

Who are you?

Megan. Burch.

Mmm-hmm.

And I get that this
can sometimes be

sensitive information
for a woman,

but how old are you?

I'm in my 20s.

Uh-huh.

And why are you
sleeping over at my house?

Or I guess the
larger question is,

why are you hanging
out with my daughter?

It's kind of hard to explain.

I bet.

No, I mean, I've never really
tried to. Not even to myself.

I like hearing things better
when they're not rehearsed.

All right, uh...

I grew up around here.

Well, no, I didn't,
I mean, you know,

across the lake
on the east side.

Uh...

I got "best couple" with
my boyfriend in high school.

And I started an alternative
dance team with my friends

meaning that we
danced to Beastie Boys

instead of top 40.
It was kind of cool.

After college, I worked some
random jobs, time went by.

I'm gonna skip to...

Okay, I went back to

grad school to get my marriage
and family therapist degree

because I thought
I wanted to have

honest conversations
with people.

Mmm-hmm.

But... But...

I did my internship and I...

I couldn't relate to
any of my clients.

I felt like a total fraud.

So, you know, I kind of found
myself in this place. Like...

This kind of weird in-between
place, you could say, you know?

And, I don't know, I
was kind of floating.

And, and then I met
Annika at the grocery store,

and I skateboarded
with her for a minute.

And, and it was
really fun, you know.

I liked skateboarding.
I missed it.

I think it was just nice to
hang out with somebody

that cut me some
slack for a change.

I'm sorry. This isn't gonna
make any sense. This is...

You know, this isn't...

It's not gonna make any
sense, so just fucking sue me.

I'm sorry, that wasn't
meant to be a lawyer joke.

It's not a joke if
it's not insulting.

I don't think I know
any lawyer jokes.

Oh, no, wait, I do. I've
got one from my dad.

What do you call 5,000 dead
lawyers at the bottom of the sea?

A good start.

Hey, did you hear the one
about the grown woman

who started hanging out with
a bunch of pubescent kids?

No, what?

No, I'd never heard
of it before either.

Come on, you gotta help me
out. So what... What were you like?

Uh, well...

Senior year, I was voted
"best gorgeousness,"

and most likely to pump gas

when I get older.

And then I realized it would
be fairly easy for me to argue

for a living if I wasn't
doing it on my own behalf.

And then there was this
intensely poufy white dress.

It gets a little hazy because
of all the tulle or taffeta.

And then there was a kid, and
then the taffeta floated out the door.

And that brings us to tonight.

Tonight.

What a cluster fuck.

You talking about the mixer?

Yeah. Mmm.

At these things, women
insist on touching your forearm

in this very deliberate manner.

These touches are
meant to communicate

gold-star level
skills in listening...

In connectedness. Oh, yeah.

Do you know about
this kind of gesture?

Yeah. You mean this one?

Yes. Do go on.

Do go on. Right?

Yeah. That's it.

Um...

Dad, you do know you can't
lecture her all night, right?

She's not a kid.

Oh, really?

You snuck your
friend into my house,

I think you're
lacking say-so here.

If you let her spend
the night in your locker...

No, that's school's property.

If you let her spend the night in
your backpack. Yes. No, that's...

Actually I paid for
the backpack. Okay.

So I guess that's my
property. I don't know.

Why don't you put a case
together. And come back.

All right. When you
got something solid.

I'm gonna go to bed.

You sure? We can
talk about this more.

Okay, goodbye.

Good night, honey.

The property argument is
inelegant but it ends things quickly.

Uh, listen, I deal with a lot
of scumbags on a daily basis.

So I've developed a real
appreciation for the truth.

I've gotta think that
if you were lying,

you'd make up an excuse
that's less fucking weird.

You do realize that
reverting to a teenage life

and sneaking into my
house is weird, correct?

Right.

And why were you
trying to sleepover?

Uh...

The lease on my
apartment ran out,

and I can't get into my
new place for a week.

And my, my friends...

I just, I didn't want to, uh...

I didn't want to involve
them or my parents.

All right, um...

Fuck it. I'm not gonna kick
you out at 1:00 in the morning.

Oh, thank you.

You're not sleeping on the
floor of my kid's bedroom.

I'm putting you
in the guest room.

Got enough pillows here?

Yeah, yeah. Thank you.

Please don't let this decision
become bad parenting on my part.

I won't. I really...
I really won't.

Wait. He let you stay?

Yeah. I'm in the guest room.

I'm gonna let you do
something too, Annika.

I'm gonna let you do
additional chores for two weeks.

Oh, no, hey, look, it's
my fault she got in trouble.

She's the one who
made the decision.

Hey, throw another tart
in there for me, will you?

It's your house.

It is my house. You know, I think
I'm gonna work from home today

because I really have no
good reason to trust you.

No offense. None taken.

Yo, your ride is here.

Patrick.

What happened to us, man?
You don't write anymore.

That's a great shirt. Listen.

I know you want
to kill your dad.

Sometimes I do, too,
but I'm doing my best

to keep this case
civil on his end,

and toilet papering
isn't gonna help.

So if you want to take some
aggression out on a father figure...

Let's get scrappy, man.

So you can move on.

Whoosh!

You're a divorce lawyer?

Yeah, he's my dad's.

Wait, do you live here now?

All right.

Yeah, we should go to school.

Dad, stop. Just go.

Thanks for the
banana, Mr. Hunter.

Seriously, Patrick.
Help me out, okay?

I'm not... I'm not
kidding actually.

Mmm. Good.

I think I cracked
her eating disorder.

Really.

She is feeling so
confident about her body.

Yeah. I can see that.

Did you see the mail come?

No, not yet.

Show me something.
What have you got?

Well, okay, I'm
working on a flip.

So you flip it
around and... Whoa!

And then you get
on. You wanna go?

Come on.

I'm middle-aged.

No, look. Have a go.
Come on. Come on.

Okay.

Just sort of like stand there.

You want to stand to
make it go, like, this way.

Okay.

Oh, geez. That almost hit
my dick. Okay. That's not good.

Maybe we should get
the training wheels for me.

Have a good day, you guys.

Can I trust you?

Yes, you can.

Okay, if you need anything,

key's under the stone tortoise.

All right. Bye.

Bye.

Hey.

Hey!

I was just retouching some guy's

back zits out of his baby shots.

That sounds lovely.

Oh, it was amazing.
It was amazing.

How's the seminar?

It's so weird being away.

I mean, with you being gone, I've
just been holed up working, and...

I'm afraid to see everyone.

'Cause I feel like if I see them

I'm just gonna
crack and tell them.

I've just been pretending
to be some complete loner.

When really I'm a secret fiancé.

So are you getting
a lot out of this?

Yeah. Yeah, you know, uh...

My animal's a
tortoise. Go figure.

A tortoise? That's sweet.

I miss you.

I miss you.

Oh, hey,

your dad has left like three
million voicemail messages

so you should probably call him.

'Cause I'm assuming he
doesn't know you're on Orcas.

Oh, yeah, no, I was... I was
being a secret seminarian.

Makes sense. Yeah.

Wise choice.

Thanks. I thought so.

Look, I've gotta go. I gotta go.

Okay, right. All right.

I love you. Glad I caught you.

Love you, too. Bye, baby. Bye.

Oh... Hey.

Will you go with
me to see my mom?

Sure.

All right.

My God.

What is this?

Um...

I don't know. It...

It just kind of felt like
something I should do.

God. She's been in there

making lemonade
for, like, 20 minutes.

I don't think she's coming out.

Just take her and put her in
the car and tell her I'm sorry.

And whatever else you need to.

What could I possibly tell her?

That I thought I'd be
the really cool mom

that took her to concerts, and
she'd want to borrow my boots?

But then one day I realized
there's no such thing as a cool mom.

That the cool mom is
really just the bad mom,

or the mom who
has become a joke.

Are you Craig's girlfriend? Is
that why you're here with her?

No. I'm just her friend.

What does she expect?

That you serve some lemonade,

and you ask her five to
10 questions about her life.

You treat somebody badly enough,

you just assume they'll
be happy to let you go.

She had... Said she
had to get something.

So, after I...

You know...

I started doing a lot
of catalog modeling,

and I ended up
doing a lot of lingerie.

Yeah, I know, I've
seen your pictures.

Oh.

Well.

Anyway,

they send me home with so many
things from these stupid photo shoots.

And I just thought
that since, you know,

obviously, well, you're
a growing woman...

And, well, maybe there might
be some things you like in here.

Um...

Do you like this one?

Yeah, it's really nice.

I think that's about right.

I mean, do you like black?
Is black a color you like?

Sure. Great.

Great, I have more.

What about florals?

I mean, do you wear
nightgowns? Or...

I have thongs. Are
you into thongs or no?

I like that one with the bows.

Great. Yeah.

That's cute.

Got room for that? Yeah.

You know, I really
needed a strapless bra.

You did?

Yeah. For my prom dress.

It's actually really good
that she gave me one.

Yeah. Yeah, no,
it's really good.

You should come.

Where? To the prom.

Saturday night. It's on
this boat in Lake Union.

Oh, no, I've gotta go
home Saturday, remember?

You know, I've gotta get into my
new place and sort everything out.

I mean, I can't just
float around forever.

No.

Come on. You
belong there with us.

Hi. I'm so sorry to keep you
waiting. Can I take your order?

Can we have two mondo chococinos

and two boysenberry muffin
tops. We're celebrating.

10.50, please.

There you go. Thank you.

Megan?

Hey. Coinky-dink.

Anthony told us that you were
working on yourself on Orcas Island.

And that you probably weren't
checking your messages,

so that's why you
weren't calling us back.

Oh, did you call?

No, my... My phone's been off.

Megan. You missed
Savannah having her baby.

And you are the godmother.

The godmother!

Juppiter?

Yesterday!

No, and they went with Callisto

because someone at the
hospital had a Juppiter last week.

Oh.

Callisto is one of
Jupiter's moons.

Oh, I only knew about Io.

Yeah, I learned there are 64.

Anyway, the baby is here.

And you're not
out of town at all.

You're not immersed
in some seminar

trying to get your life
moving in the right direction.

You are driving around
getting chococinos with...

Who the hell is that? I
don't even know who that is.

Oh.

Meg... Is that your drug dealer?

No.

No. I'm not on drugs.

Okay, look, here's the thing. No,
I'm not... I'm not on Orcas Island.

But I am on Orcas, if you think
about Orcas on a bigger level.

Like symbolically.

I just, you know...

I just needed a
second of personal time.

You know, I mean, it's a week,

but in terms of my
life, it's more like

just a second to
get my shit together.

And then... Then I'm going
home in a couple of days. Okay?

I feel like I should really tell
Anthony that you never left.

What are you talking about?

Oh, my God. You're
supposed to be my friend.

I mean, it was you and
me and Savan and Danielle

before he ever
even asked me out.

But I'm not going to tell him.

Thanks.

Because he bought a ring.
And he's going to propose to you.

Yeah. That's right. He did.

I helped him pick it out,
and it's, like, incredible.

So I bet that makes
you think twice about

how ridiculous you're being
with this fake Orcas stuff. Meg...

I really want this
wedding for you.

And it's not even the wedding.

It's that we're friends.

It's like how our prom,
it wasn't just a dance,

it was us getting
ready together.

And then how we all
lied to our moms together.

And stayed at the cheap hotel,

and went swimming
naked in that nasty pool.

And we all thought
we were so cool.

But if you had stayed
home that night,

then the stories wouldn't
have made sense to you.

You wouldn't have been a part
of everything that night meant.

And I just think now that we're
adults, our lives are that times 10.

What are you saying?

I'm saying that I'm not going
to mess things up for you. Just...

Don't mess them up for yourself.

All right. What
was that all about?

Oh, she just had a
message to give me.

Um, I need to get a baby gift.

Hey.

Where you two been?

Um...

Megan took me to
get some new bras.

Oh.

How was that? Was that fun?

Fun?

I'm gonna go and lie
down for a while. All right.

Um, Misty is gonna come
over and have a sleepover

'cause we have
no school tomorrow.

No school, why is that?

Yeah, it's a staff
development day.

Okay, well, keep Misty
away from our valuables.

I was joking. That was a joke.

Yeah. I know.

Goodbye.

Want some poppy snaps?

I totally forgot about this guy.

Oh, my God. Herschel
Thrasher. What was his mom on?

You really don't
have a chance in life

if your mom wears a belly chain.

Look at Tiffany Wilmington
with her real teeth.

Oh, my God.

Who is she dating now?

Uh, Kyle Stempano,
I think. Is that right?

I really wouldn't know.

I'm gonna go get
some snacks, okay?

Okay.

Bye. Later.

Peace! Peace!

Hey. Hey.

Come in. Yeah?

Thanks for knocking.

It's okay. Thought
I'd be polite.

Them's the rules. Mmm.

Can I complain to you?

Sure, go ahead.

I'm so fucking stressed out
right now, all I want is a drink.

I went for the box
wine in the fridge,

and it's funny how much that
vintage tastes like tap water.

Yeah, you know, I'm, yeah. The
box stuff really is never very good.

Ah.

So, what are you working on?

A letter to opposing counsel.

During mediation
my client agreed

to give back two of her
handguns to her husband,

and now she's decided they
were anniversary gifts to her.

Wow. That's romantic.

Are you gonna win?

I hope so because

it would kill me to see a
mother separated from her guns.

Hey, um...

No, never mind.

What?

You want to come
get a drink with me?

Now? Yeah.

Well, I'm supposed to be
in the middle of a sleepover.

Oh, they're like little
animals. They're like gerbils.

They have next
to no sense of time.

Aren't you leaving soon?

Yeah.

One pop.

Careful.

Okay, we gotta hurry.

Don't slip.

Thank you.

Hey. Hey.

Anybody here? All right.

Waitress won't give it to 'em.

Right.

So he says, um...

Hey.

Hey, how you doing?

Just about closing.

Oh, well, that's perfect for our
needs. We just want a round of shots.

Bourbon.

Bourbon. Hey.

Wow. Like your style. Thank you.

Bourbon in a Mexican restaurant.

Can I get a Pacifico? Of course.

Uh, I think doing
cheers is cheesy,

so if you need to touch
glass to glass, use my watch.

So do I.

Mmm.

You have time for another?

Yes. Yeah.

Thank you.

Twist my arm.

So, uh, what's up
with that Junior kid?

Is my daughter in love
with that Rico Suave kid?

Whoa, that's
friend-friend privilege.

Can't talk about that.

Not much going on between
the ears on that one, is there?

Oh, you know, at the moment,
she doesn't need him to be smart.

Thank you.

Yeah, I guess it's easier
when you're young.

All you need from someone
is to feel stupid around them.

What do you need
when you're older?

You need to feel like you're on

the same side of
what seems stupid.

Oh.

You really like hanging
out with her, huh?

Yeah.

You genuinely like
hanging out with her?

I genuinely think
she's really cool.

Huh.

You know, good
for her. I like that kid.

I do, I do. I love her.

Good.

I'm a little hard on her. Maybe I
haven't been giving her enough credit.

She's a good kid.

At least she didn't end
up paying attention to me.

You know. Could be worse.

I can't go back and fix my
own fucked up head but...

She doesn't have to

get bitter in the first
place, does she?

No.

I think we need another drink.

Let's have a drink.
Let's have a drink.

No cheers.

No cheers.

Right?

You know, so, monks
and priests, right?

They say they get
their calling from God.

But that means that it was
from something outside.

It wasn't from
something inside, right?

And everybody thinks
that that's just great.

Yeah. Right?

What the fuck, right?

Sorry, guys.

You're gonna have
to close your tab out.

- Going home.
- Aw, man.

I... I...

This is your coat. So I
don't have any money.

No, no, no. My responsibility.

Okay, good. I dragged you out.

Put your money away.

Here, it's on me.
It's on... It's on you.

It's on Blockbuster.
Gosh darn it.

That was fun. Yeah.

Yeah, I just... I just wanna...

I just wanna say
thank you for...

For what?

For letting me stay.

Well, I loved having
you, you know.

You're good people.

And uh...

Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait,
wait... Wait, wait, wait.

I just... I just, uh...

I don't think we should
finger-bang in the street.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You know? Of course.

No, no, no, no, no. We
should go to my... The house.

House, yeah, yeah, the house.

Well, maybe we take
Annika's tee-shirt off.

Yeah. Maybe
that's a little creepy.

Yeah.

Yeah. That's hot.

Yeah, I'm just wearing,
like, a little tee shirt with,

like, crotchless panties.

Who's she talking to?

Our math teacher.

Does he know it's her?

No. Okay, good.

I'm just gonna... I'm just
gonna brush my teeth, okay?

Yeah, yeah, you're good.

Hey. Hey.

Hey.

Got a headache?

Yeah.

This is an old hangover cure
from college. You want one?

Yeah.

It's very scientific.

I'm not messing around.

No.

You know...

You can stay here a
little longer if you need to.

Yeah, you know, I've gotta
get back into my new place.

So...

Okay.

All right. I'm calling
Patrick and Junior again.

Laggies.

Do I have something on my face?

Yeah. My dad's saliva.

Oh, shit. Yeah.

How about that?

I think you're pretty but...

That's my dad.

I... Oh, God, I... Annika, I...

I don't know what
happened, you know. I mean...

I was thinking the whole time
like, "What are you doing, Megan?"

No, no, no, no. I really
don't need details.

Look, I've had a couple
of hours to think about it.

And I just keep thinking
about how lonely he's been.

You know, and how hard
he's been trying with me lately.

And as much shit
I talk about him...

I love him.

You know, and I
want him to be happy.

And I want you to be happy.

You know, so if you two
are happy together, then...

It might be kind of cool.

And obviously, he can't come
with us when we go out. But...

You know, if he wanted to take
you to the movies, or whatever,

I've decided not to
lose my shit over it.

Annika, I don't
think that dating

is in the future for
your dad and me.

Did I just hear you're
boning Mr. Hunter?

No, it's not like that.

Ew. Gross.

Yo, finally.

Fucking drop it
already, I'm here, okay?

Oh, bad mood.

Hey, the tux place
is at the other end.

All right, so we'll meet
back here in like an hour?

Sure. If you can live
without me that long.

I'm not sure I can.

You've gotta dance
with him tomorrow night.

I mean, who's to say?

Okay, I'm trying this one on.

It's you.

I know.

No. No?

You wear white to your
wedding. Not to prom.

Shut up. I like it.

This is it. This is it!

I look so fucking good, man.

I don't even know
why those other chicks

are even gonna
bother to show up.

What do you think?

Oh, you look so cute.

Good?

You should buy it. Yeah.

Do you have any gum in your bag?

Right there. Little shorter.

You can't take it a little more.

Yeah, but like, shorter.

You want my ass out? No.

She wants my ass out.

"A and M. Best couple forever."

He had it engraved?

Are you married?

I'm only engaged.

Only engaged.

Who's the A?

You don't know him.

My dad know about him?

No.

Are you going back to him?

Yes.

God, you're even
worse than my mom.

You know, at least when she
pulled my dad into her bullshit,

she didn't know she
was gonna leave.

Oh, shit.

God, Megan, don't even turn
around and look at me right now.

I'll swear on whatever
you want me to swear on.

I really like your
dad. I wasn't faking it.

You're a huge fucking liar.

Even your fake ring
was fake at being fake.

Who knows what else
you're trying to lie to me about.

She's really hurt, Megan.

Oh, shut up, Junior. You pulled
your own bullshit with her, too.

Oh, don't you even
try to bring him into this.

Can you please stop the
fucking yelling while I'm driving?

Who gives a fuck about
your dad's love life?

He helps break up other
people's relationships

every fucking day.

Don't be a dick to Annika

just because your dad's a dick

and her dad's trying to
bring home some cash.

Shut up, Misty! How does any...

I don't know what crawled
up your ass today...

You want to hear what
crawled up my ass, Annika?

Oh, God!

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Are you okay?

Is anybody hurt? Are you okay?

- Is your neck okay?
- Yeah, I'm fine.

Okay.

I'm drunk, Megan.

He's sending me to
boarding school next year.

And she didn't
even fight him on it.

I opened the bottle of
wine you bought me,

and I put it in
the OJ container.

I just didn't want
to care anymore.

Okay.

Okay, everyone out of the
car. Out of the car right now.

When the cops get
here, I was driving.

The wheels slipped. I
think my palms got sweaty.

Can you touch your
nose with your left hand?

With...

Are you able to recite
the alphabet backwards?

Uh...

Z-X-Y-V...

No, W, W, V... Oh, God.

I don't think that
I could do that

even if I hadn't been drinking.

Have you been drinking?

No.

Please, stay here a moment.

I just wanted to say that

what you're doing for
Patrick is pretty solid.

This officer thinks
I've been driving drunk,

and I might be legally
drunk. I don't know.

I had some gin this morning.

What the fuck, Megan?

Miss Burch, I'm going to
ask you to take a breath test.

Is that okay with you?

Yes.

I want you to
blow into this tube.

Continue to blow until I
say stop. Is that understood?

Keep blowing
please. Keep blowing.

That's good.

Miss Burch, I'm gonna
ask you to turn around

and put your hands
behind your back.

Hold your hands
together, please.

Wait, no, she... She
didn't do anything.

No, chill out, Patrick.

Please, relax.

This way, ma'am.

Annika, can you please call
your dad to come, please?

Watch your head, please.

Are you in? Yeah.

What are you gonna do?

Burch.

Your lawyer's here to see you.

Thank you, Officer.

Well, I've planned your escape.

It's gonna involve
a lot of soap.

We're gonna have to
roofie this guy over here.

But I think we can do it.

Annika didn't tell you.

She told me.

I know Patrick was driving.
And I know what you did for him.

I think it's a really
stand-up thing.

Craig...

Uh...

I've got something to tell
you, and you're gonna hate me.

I doubt that.

Uh...

I am not waiting
for a new apartment.

My boyfriend, the one
that I got "best couple" with,

he proposed.

And I needed some time.

I'm engaged to be married.

So you...

So you didn't lose your lease?

That's not why you've
been staying over?

No. I just...

I needed to get my head
together, and I gave myself a week.

When are you getting married?

Tomorrow.

You know, I mean,
if I'm not in jail.

I, uh, we're eloping. I'm
getting married tomorrow.

That's really something.

Yeah.

Tomorrow. Huh.

Congratulations.

I'm so sorry. I'm so
sorry. No, that's...

I'm such a shitty person. I
really want to tell you everything.

The first time I met the
kids, I bought them alcohol.

It never happened again,

but that's where
Patrick got the wine from

and I went with
Annika to see her mom.

So you met, uh...

Shit. I'm gonna stop there.

That's all the lies
though. You know, the...

The rest is true.

However, I acted
around you, that was true.

Whatever happened
between us, that was true.

And I know that I
shouldn't have kissed you.

I know I shouldn't have done
that. It just got so confusing.

'Cause I had this feeling like
I was already in love with you.

Say something.

The number you blew at
the scene was borderline.

The number you blew
at the station was under.

So they're gonna release you.

Something else?

Like what?

That I haven't felt connected
to anyone I've flirted with

or casually seen or dated
or slept with for years,

for I don't know how long.

That this was a rare deal.

That right now I'm aware looking
at you, this could be it for me.

I never anticipated still
having to find a place

where I'd fit in by the
time I was an adult either.

I thought you
automatically got one

once you had a job and a family.

But it's just you, alone.

Thanks for coming.

Hey, no problem. I'm happy to.

Do you want to tell
me what happened?

No, nothing. It was a mix-up.
They're not pressing charges.

Good. Good.

Listen, honey...

Dad, no, I...

I need you to know
that I fucked up, too.

So I'm in no
position to judge you.

What are you talking about?
You can totally judge me.

I did something really stupid.

And it's gonna take a long time

before your mom can
think well of me again.

You told her?

Yeah. I wasn't going anyplace.

I just had a moment
in time where...

You know, I lost sight of who I
was and what was important to me.

So you're staying together?

Yeah, we're gonna work
on it. She wants to work on it.

Do you still think
you were just shifting?

Well, that's what, you know,
relationships are, you know?

Not the cheating part,
that was my problem.

But you know, you don't just
get into one and then that's it.

It's work, and it's always
changing. It's always changing.

Yeah, I think I know
what you mean.

Look, I was just happy to hear
from you. Even if it was from jail.

Hey. Hey.

Baby.

Welcome back.

So I, uh, checked the
chapel's photographer out.

He's no me, but he's
done some okay work.

I think we're gonna have to
paste in the Caribbean behind us

so our parents think we went
further away and couldn't invite them.

Who's that?

I don't know. I got it.

All right.

Hey-o.

Misty.

Uh, what are you doing here?

Well, I brought the stuff you
left behind from the crash.

Here. Oh, thanks.

Oh, and by the way,

Patrick's dad wants you to pay
for his car repairs out of pocket.

Out of...

Nobody does that
unless it's a scratch.

Yeah, well, he's a dick.

Oh, my God.

Anywho, um...

I'm also here to tell you that
you need to come to prom.

Misty, I can't.

I know.

You and Annika are having
a lot of issues right now.

But if you stop being
friends after this,

she's gonna become, like,
secretly tortured about it.

That's how she is.

I know she looks up to you.

That trip you got her to
take to her mom's was huge.

And all this time you've been
spending with us fucknuts.

Hey. Hi.

Who's this?

Uh, I'm Misty.

Hi, Misty. Yeah.

Megan's been mentoring me.

Right. At the seminar, she
was in the junior program.

The junior program.

Oh, wow, that's cool.

What was your animal?

I'm my own animal.

Ah.

Right. I like that.
I respect that.

Okay. Nice meeting you.

Yeah, you too.

He's cute.

Thanks.

Well, we bought you a
ticket as Patrick's date.

Just come.

Attention, passengers.

Flight 514 has begun
general boarding to Las Vegas.

Please, line up to the
right of the podium...

Oh, my God. Oh,
my God. Here we go.

Okay. Wait. Hold on a second. I
know it's going to be bad quality.

But I need to capture
this moment. Right.

Of course. Of course.

All right. Just gonna
send this to the group.

They're over at the soft
open for the restaurant.

We've got to celebrate with
those guys as soon as we get back.

Why do you need to do that?

I'm not gonna send
it to our parents.

I know that's a whole
other conversation.

And... Done.

Why did you need to do that?

Well, I figured 'cause
they can't be here,

it's our way of
bringing them into it.

Oh, look, Allison
already wrote back.

Oh, my God. I can't do this.

What? Oh, are you thinking...

You're thinking we need
to have a real wedding.

I know, and you know what?

That would actually make
me a whole lot more happy.

No. No, I mean that
we can't be together.

Wait, what?

Oh, my God...

Oh, my God, I think...

I think I might throw up
that I'm finally doing this.

Doing what? What are you doing?

Okay...

Um...

How am I gonna
explain this to you, right?

Right, the animal thing,
right? The animal thing, okay.

God, Anthony. That
could never be my speed.

But... But if it helps you to
understand what I'm trying to say to you,

then...

Anth, I'm a snake.

I'm a snake that's been dragging
my old skin around with me

for way too long. I'm a snake.

No, you're not. No, no.

You have to see this about me.

I'm dropping out. I'm
dropping out of the group.

Okay, I mean, that's
okay, 'cause that's them,

and you can just cut down on

the amount of time you
hang out with them...

'Cause that's just
them. That's not us.

No.

No, you're still
part of the group.

You and me, we're...

We're somewhere back there.
You know, we're in the past.

Holy shit, Meg.

All this time?

No, no, God, no.

Not all of it.

Well, however long.

Holy shit.

This is it.

Yeah.

This is what it comes down to.

Yeah.

Waking up in the morning,

and never being
able to see your face...

Ever again.

No, we can still be
in each other's lives.

No, we can still...

We can still talk?

Yeah.

Yeah, right.

Sure.

Hey.

Hey. You came.

The smoky eye looks great.

Thanks.

Okay, what I did to your
dad was wrong. But...

I just really,
really fell for him.

Annika...

I broke it off with
my boyfriend.

Yeah, well...

I guess I know what
it's like to forget yourself

when you really,
really like someone.

Okay, I'm gonna
tell you two things

that I've gotten
some perspective on

after being out of high
school for a while now.

The first is that a lot of the
math they're teaching you

that they swear you'll
use in your life, you won't.

You're never going to
need to use parabolas

and you really, really
don't need to know shapes

that have more than
eight fucking sides.

The second...

The second,

which I've only got some
perspective on recently, but it's this.

You can't keep putting
aside what you want

for some imaginary future.

You've just got to suck it
up and go with your gut.

All right, guys. This is it.

This is the last
song of your prom.

Make it good.

You gonna sit here?

All right.

Fuck it. I'm gonna do it.

Good.

Hey.

Um...

I wanted to tell you, um,

I have serious feelings for you.

And I would like to cut in.

And also...

Junior, I'd like to
be your girlfriend.

So you're saying that you
want to try and be together?

Yeah.

Okay. Okay.

Okay.

So...

Did you hear the one
about the grown woman

who fell in love with the
really pissed off lawyer?

Is it funny?

It's really funny.

Come here.

Close the door.