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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:10,875 --> 00:00:12,917 ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:12,959 --> 00:00:15,208 Which is why I say the potato 3 00:00:15,250 --> 00:00:19,250 is superior to the sports bra. 4 00:00:19,291 --> 00:00:20,667 And if you don't believe us, 5 00:00:20,709 --> 00:00:24,208 try making French fries out of a sports bra. 6 00:00:24,250 --> 00:00:26,709 Okay, next on "iCarly," we're going to talk 7 00:00:26,750 --> 00:00:29,667 about the doorman who works in the lobby of this building. 8 00:00:29,709 --> 00:00:31,125 His name is Lewbert. 9 00:00:31,166 --> 00:00:34,417 The meanest man alive. We hate his guts. 10 00:00:34,458 --> 00:00:36,125 And so you can hate Lewbert's guts 11 00:00:36,166 --> 00:00:37,458 just as much as us... 12 00:00:37,500 --> 00:00:39,206 We asked our technical producer Freddie... 13 00:00:39,208 --> 00:00:42,208 Say yo to the people, Freddie. Yo to the people. 14 00:00:42,250 --> 00:00:44,000 How y'all doing out there? 15 00:00:44,041 --> 00:00:47,125 That's enough, Freddie. Anyway, we've been secretly 16 00:00:47,166 --> 00:00:49,542 videotaping Lewbert for almost a week. 17 00:00:49,583 --> 00:00:52,375 So let's take a look at some of the highlights. 18 00:00:52,417 --> 00:00:54,667 Freddie, roll the clip. 19 00:00:54,709 --> 00:00:58,000 Playback. 20 00:00:58,041 --> 00:01:00,542 Okay, and there's Lewbert sitting at his desk. 21 00:01:00,583 --> 00:01:03,625 Just a nasty little man working in the lobby. 22 00:01:03,667 --> 00:01:06,208 And if you look real close, you can see his wart. 23 00:01:06,250 --> 00:01:07,166 Zoom in on it, Freddie. 24 00:01:07,208 --> 00:01:10,000 Digital zoom. 25 00:01:10,041 --> 00:01:14,333 There it is living happily right on Lewbert's face. 26 00:01:14,375 --> 00:01:17,792 I call that wart Little Lewbert. 27 00:01:17,834 --> 00:01:20,625 Zoom out. Ooh, okay, see that lady? 28 00:01:20,667 --> 00:01:22,417 Watch what happens. Out! 29 00:01:22,458 --> 00:01:24,417 I just need to check my mail. 30 00:01:24,458 --> 00:01:26,333 No dogs in my lobby! 31 00:01:26,375 --> 00:01:28,709 I will leave in a minute. 32 00:01:28,750 --> 00:01:30,542 Now! Out! 33 00:01:30,583 --> 00:01:34,208 You know what? I pay rent in this building. 34 00:01:34,250 --> 00:01:36,206 This is not... I can't believe you are treating us like this. 35 00:01:36,208 --> 00:01:38,458 He's arguing with a pomegranate. 36 00:01:38,500 --> 00:01:39,500 Pomeranian. 37 00:01:39,542 --> 00:01:41,375 Whatever. Okay. Okay. 38 00:01:41,417 --> 00:01:43,166 Now watch Lewbert closely. 39 00:01:43,208 --> 00:01:47,083 See that little kid with the balloon right next to him? 40 00:01:47,125 --> 00:01:49,458 Mommy, that man ate my cookie. 41 00:01:49,500 --> 00:01:51,667 You took my son's cookie? 42 00:01:51,709 --> 00:01:53,583 No. No way. Oh! 43 00:01:55,083 --> 00:01:58,166 You are so cruel. You've got crumbs 44 00:01:58,208 --> 00:02:02,125 falling all over your face and all over my face. 45 00:02:02,166 --> 00:02:04,333 Security, that man took my son's cookie. 46 00:02:04,375 --> 00:02:05,709 What are you going to do about it? 47 00:02:06,709 --> 00:02:08,375 Ahh! 48 00:02:08,417 --> 00:02:10,667 You see what he did? Did you see that? 49 00:02:10,709 --> 00:02:12,959 As you can see, Lewbert's a bad person. 50 00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:15,208 Not a good dude. 51 00:02:15,250 --> 00:02:17,834 Which is why we're introducing a new segment on "iCarly," 52 00:02:17,875 --> 00:02:21,375 which we call Messin' with Lewbert. 53 00:02:23,458 --> 00:02:25,125 And there's Lewbert live. 54 00:02:25,166 --> 00:02:26,875 I'll dial the lobby downstairs. 55 00:02:31,333 --> 00:02:32,333 Main lobby. 56 00:02:33,542 --> 00:02:36,750 Ahh! 57 00:02:38,083 --> 00:02:39,917 And that concludes this segment of... 58 00:02:39,959 --> 00:02:43,291 Messin' with Lewbert. 59 00:02:43,333 --> 00:02:45,125 Who is this? 60 00:02:45,166 --> 00:02:47,625 Ahh! 61 00:02:47,667 --> 00:02:51,208 In five, four, three, two... 62 00:02:53,667 --> 00:02:56,125 ♪ I know you see ♪ 63 00:02:56,166 --> 00:02:58,458 ♪ Somehow the world will change for me ♪ 64 00:02:58,500 --> 00:03:02,583 ♪ And be so wonderful ♪ 65 00:03:02,625 --> 00:03:05,291 ♪ Live life, breathe air ♪ 66 00:03:05,333 --> 00:03:07,792 ♪ I know somehow we're going to get there ♪ 67 00:03:07,834 --> 00:03:12,208 ♪ And feel so wonderful ♪ 68 00:03:12,250 --> 00:03:16,125 ♪ It's all for real ♪ 69 00:03:16,166 --> 00:03:18,041 ♪ I'm telling you just how I feel ♪ 70 00:03:18,083 --> 00:03:22,041 ♪ So wake up the members of my nation ♪ 71 00:03:22,083 --> 00:03:23,917 ♪ It's your time to be ♪ 72 00:03:23,959 --> 00:03:26,917 ♪ There's no chance unless you take one ♪ 73 00:03:26,959 --> 00:03:29,500 ♪ Every time, just see the brighter side ♪ 74 00:03:29,542 --> 00:03:32,792 ♪ Of every situation ♪ 75 00:03:32,834 --> 00:03:34,375 ♪ Some things are meant to be ♪ 76 00:03:34,417 --> 00:03:38,041 ♪ So give me your best and leave the rest to me ♪ 77 00:03:38,083 --> 00:03:40,375 ♪ Leave it all to me ♪ 78 00:03:40,417 --> 00:03:42,458 ♪ Leave it all to me ♪ 79 00:03:42,500 --> 00:03:45,166 ♪ Just leave it all to me ♪ 80 00:03:54,625 --> 00:03:57,125 What up, my peeps? Wow. 81 00:03:57,166 --> 00:04:00,875 That greeting was uncool in so many ways. 82 00:04:00,917 --> 00:04:03,750 Yeah, well, uncool is the new cool. 83 00:04:03,792 --> 00:04:07,792 Wow, that comeback was uncool in so many ways. 84 00:04:07,834 --> 00:04:09,039 All right, you know what, Sam? 85 00:04:09,041 --> 00:04:10,373 What Freddie? Why don't you tell me what. 86 00:04:10,375 --> 00:04:11,957 I'm a human being. Oh, you're a human being. 87 00:04:11,959 --> 00:04:13,250 I feel that I deserve respect. 88 00:04:13,291 --> 00:04:15,709 You deserve a brain. At least I have a brain. 89 00:04:15,750 --> 00:04:17,333 Oh, no, you don't have a brain. 90 00:04:17,375 --> 00:04:18,542 You have nose hairs. Look. 91 00:04:18,583 --> 00:04:20,625 What did you just do? What was that? 92 00:04:20,667 --> 00:04:21,917 Oh, see, when you have a cat, 93 00:04:21,959 --> 00:04:23,639 that's how you get him to stop misbehaving. 94 00:04:23,667 --> 00:04:25,067 You just spritz him with some water. 95 00:04:25,083 --> 00:04:26,542 Well you can't do that to us. 96 00:04:26,583 --> 00:04:28,206 We're not cats. Yeah, just put your little 97 00:04:28,208 --> 00:04:29,875 bottle down. 98 00:04:29,917 --> 00:04:31,542 Spencer, dinnertime. 99 00:04:31,583 --> 00:04:32,792 You guys staying for dinner? 100 00:04:32,834 --> 00:04:36,250 Yeah. I got no place to go. 101 00:04:36,291 --> 00:04:40,917 I'm here. Ooh, one sec. 102 00:04:40,959 --> 00:04:42,375 So what's for dinner? 103 00:04:42,417 --> 00:04:44,500 We're having my special spaghetti. 104 00:04:44,542 --> 00:04:47,458 Yay. Yeah. 105 00:04:47,500 --> 00:04:49,083 Nice-looking meatballs. 106 00:04:49,125 --> 00:04:51,959 Hey, your guys' web show was pretty awesome tonight. 107 00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:55,083 I loved how you zoomed in on Lewbert's big old wart. 108 00:04:55,125 --> 00:04:59,041 I wonder what would happen if you squeezed that thing? 109 00:04:59,083 --> 00:05:01,500 You think some kind of Lewberty goo would squirt out of it? 110 00:05:04,041 --> 00:05:06,241 I just wish I could get more people watching the show. 111 00:05:06,250 --> 00:05:07,957 The same number of people watched "iCarly" this week 112 00:05:07,959 --> 00:05:09,750 as last week. That's the problem. 113 00:05:09,792 --> 00:05:11,123 Our show is getting better and better. 114 00:05:11,125 --> 00:05:13,083 So more people should be watching it. 115 00:05:13,125 --> 00:05:14,790 Why do you guys care how many people are watching? 116 00:05:14,792 --> 00:05:16,000 Why do we care? 117 00:05:16,041 --> 00:05:17,542 You're an artist. When you create 118 00:05:17,583 --> 00:05:19,023 a new sculpture, do you want 2 people 119 00:05:19,041 --> 00:05:21,081 to see it or do you want 2 million people to see it? 120 00:05:23,041 --> 00:05:24,041 2 million. 121 00:05:26,959 --> 00:05:28,625 So... ideas? 122 00:05:28,667 --> 00:05:32,542 Yeah, your spaghetti could use more garlic. 123 00:05:32,583 --> 00:05:34,834 I think Carly's spaghetti is great. 124 00:05:34,875 --> 00:05:37,458 Then why don't you put some down your pants? 125 00:05:37,500 --> 00:05:40,333 Because maybe I don't want to put pasta down my pants. 126 00:05:40,375 --> 00:05:43,000 Maybe if you tried... 127 00:05:43,041 --> 00:05:44,709 All right, look. 128 00:05:44,750 --> 00:05:46,750 We all know that making a good show is important. 129 00:05:46,792 --> 00:05:48,289 And so is getting more people to watch. 130 00:05:48,291 --> 00:05:49,998 So what if we each come up with a cool way 131 00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:51,200 to get more people to watch... 132 00:05:51,208 --> 00:05:53,000 Yeah. And then we show our ideas 133 00:05:53,041 --> 00:05:54,500 to the "iCarly" audience? 134 00:05:54,542 --> 00:05:56,748 And we let them vote on who came up with the best idea? 135 00:05:56,750 --> 00:05:58,041 Right, like a contest. 136 00:05:58,083 --> 00:06:00,458 That way we do a good show and get more viewers. 137 00:06:00,500 --> 00:06:04,375 I'm on Carly's team. Whoa, teams? She said each. 138 00:06:04,417 --> 00:06:06,166 And why do you get to be on Carly's team? 139 00:06:06,208 --> 00:06:09,041 Because "each" sounds like a lot of work. 140 00:06:09,083 --> 00:06:10,875 Relax, buddy. I'll be on your team. 141 00:06:10,917 --> 00:06:12,834 Seriously? Yeah, I've got time. 142 00:06:12,875 --> 00:06:14,206 You're not still dating that girl? 143 00:06:14,208 --> 00:06:17,625 No, she only liked me for my socks. 144 00:06:17,667 --> 00:06:21,583 That's weird. Is it? 145 00:06:30,625 --> 00:06:31,957 Well, okay, then. We're partners. 146 00:06:31,959 --> 00:06:33,583 Partners. 147 00:06:33,625 --> 00:06:35,373 Perfect. So it's me and Sam versus Freddie and Spencer. 148 00:06:35,375 --> 00:06:37,792 Team with the best idea to get more viewers wins. 149 00:06:37,834 --> 00:06:39,583 Okay, but I think the team 150 00:06:39,625 --> 00:06:41,875 that loses should have some penalty. 151 00:06:41,917 --> 00:06:43,917 Hasn't life already penalized you enough? 152 00:06:49,875 --> 00:06:52,583 That's for being mean. It was worth it. 153 00:06:52,625 --> 00:06:53,875 All right, come on. 154 00:06:53,917 --> 00:06:55,667 What should the losers have to do? 155 00:06:55,709 --> 00:06:58,333 I'm going to say losing team 156 00:06:58,375 --> 00:07:02,041 has to touch Lewbert's wart. 157 00:07:02,083 --> 00:07:04,083 Yeah! 158 00:07:04,125 --> 00:07:05,166 I mean, uh... 159 00:07:08,166 --> 00:07:15,333 ♪ ♪ 160 00:07:17,500 --> 00:07:19,000 Hey, Freddie. 161 00:07:19,041 --> 00:07:22,291 Ow. Man. 162 00:07:22,333 --> 00:07:23,500 What are you doing? 163 00:07:23,542 --> 00:07:26,583 Bleeding. Why are you here? 164 00:07:26,625 --> 00:07:28,000 We are going to win the contest. 165 00:07:28,041 --> 00:07:30,125 I came up with an insanely awesome way 166 00:07:30,166 --> 00:07:32,125 to get more people watching your guys' webcasts. 167 00:07:32,166 --> 00:07:33,709 Tell me. 168 00:07:33,750 --> 00:07:34,998 We get a bunch of fireworks, right, 169 00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:36,875 and not the lightweight consumer-grade stuff. 170 00:07:36,917 --> 00:07:39,667 I'm talking Fourth of July razzle dazzle. 171 00:07:39,709 --> 00:07:41,834 Razzle dazzle? Yes, both. 172 00:07:41,875 --> 00:07:44,875 Then at night, we launch the fireworks 173 00:07:44,917 --> 00:07:46,959 off the roof of our building, and they explode, 174 00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:50,834 spelling out "iCarly.com" in the sky. 175 00:07:50,875 --> 00:07:53,917 Can we really do that? No. 176 00:07:53,959 --> 00:07:57,875 So I came up with something else, a sign. 177 00:07:57,917 --> 00:07:59,875 A sign? A big sign, 178 00:07:59,917 --> 00:08:01,917 one that lights up all different colors 179 00:08:01,959 --> 00:08:05,542 and says, "Please go online to iCarly.com." 180 00:08:05,583 --> 00:08:06,792 Yeah, yeah, that's good. 181 00:08:06,834 --> 00:08:09,959 And we should hang it some place like... 182 00:08:10,000 --> 00:08:12,375 like over a really busy highway. 183 00:08:12,417 --> 00:08:14,331 Thousands of people will see it when they drive by. 184 00:08:14,333 --> 00:08:16,625 You are a tiny genius. 185 00:08:18,625 --> 00:08:21,166 Well, well, 186 00:08:21,208 --> 00:08:25,583 look what the janitor swept up, Spencer Shay. 187 00:08:25,625 --> 00:08:27,834 I thought I'd seen the last of you eight years ago 188 00:08:27,875 --> 00:08:32,500 when you graduated, but sadly you're back. 189 00:08:32,542 --> 00:08:34,208 Nice to see you, Ms. Briggs. 190 00:08:34,250 --> 00:08:36,375 Or now that I'm older, may I call you Margaret? 191 00:08:36,417 --> 00:08:37,667 You may not. Why? 192 00:08:37,709 --> 00:08:40,125 My name is Francine. 193 00:08:40,166 --> 00:08:42,792 Now, get out before I give you detention. 194 00:08:42,834 --> 00:08:45,000 I'm 26; you can't give me detention. 195 00:08:45,041 --> 00:08:47,667 Then I give you detention. One week. 196 00:08:47,709 --> 00:08:49,458 What? You don't scare him. 197 00:08:49,500 --> 00:08:51,542 Yes, she does. Get out. 198 00:08:51,583 --> 00:08:52,792 No. Two weeks detention. 199 00:08:52,834 --> 00:08:54,709 Dude, get out of here. 200 00:08:54,750 --> 00:08:55,830 No, no, no, no, no. wait. 201 00:08:55,834 --> 00:08:57,208 I'm not letting this lady... 202 00:08:57,250 --> 00:08:59,417 Mr. Shay, you have 30 seconds to leave or else 203 00:08:59,458 --> 00:09:01,208 Freddie gets expelled. 204 00:09:01,250 --> 00:09:02,750 Go! 205 00:09:05,792 --> 00:09:08,417 ♪ ♪ 206 00:09:08,458 --> 00:09:10,000 I got it. I got it. 207 00:09:10,041 --> 00:09:11,709 You thought of an idea for the contest? 208 00:09:11,750 --> 00:09:13,333 No. You remember at lunch 209 00:09:13,375 --> 00:09:14,873 that piece of corn that got stuck in my teeth? 210 00:09:14,875 --> 00:09:18,166 No. Well, here it is. 211 00:09:18,208 --> 00:09:22,291 And thank you for flicking your used corn onto my floor. 212 00:09:22,333 --> 00:09:24,331 Now give me that. You've got to help me think of an idea. 213 00:09:24,333 --> 00:09:28,333 All right. Right after we watch "Seattle Beat." 214 00:09:28,375 --> 00:09:29,667 No Please? 215 00:09:29,709 --> 00:09:31,206 No, we're not watching... Oh, come on. 216 00:09:31,208 --> 00:09:32,581 We're watching "Seattle Beat." No, we're not watching. 217 00:09:32,583 --> 00:09:33,957 I'm not gonna let you. We're not watching the show. 218 00:09:33,959 --> 00:09:35,331 Come on. Let me watch... Okay, fine. 219 00:09:35,333 --> 00:09:37,083 Yay. 220 00:09:37,125 --> 00:09:38,845 Okay, you may like the old drummer better, 221 00:09:38,875 --> 00:09:40,667 but I still say they're the best band 222 00:09:40,709 --> 00:09:42,333 happening in Seattle today. 223 00:09:42,375 --> 00:09:44,039 And to prove it, you're going to see them right here 224 00:09:44,041 --> 00:09:45,875 on "Seattle Beat" live 225 00:09:45,917 --> 00:09:48,000 coming up in less than a half hour. 226 00:09:48,041 --> 00:09:50,208 Is that cool? 227 00:09:50,250 --> 00:09:51,500 Whoo. 228 00:09:51,542 --> 00:09:52,792 And how about you people 229 00:09:52,834 --> 00:09:55,542 outside the "Seattle Beat" window? 230 00:10:00,375 --> 00:10:02,208 I got it. I know we're going to get 231 00:10:02,250 --> 00:10:04,291 a ton more people to watch our webcast. 232 00:10:04,333 --> 00:10:06,500 Does it involve dental floss? No, why? 233 00:10:06,542 --> 00:10:09,667 I think that piece of corn had a friend. 234 00:10:09,709 --> 00:10:11,041 Listen, you see those people 235 00:10:11,083 --> 00:10:12,667 outside the window on "Seattle Beat"? 236 00:10:12,709 --> 00:10:13,959 Yeah. You and I are going 237 00:10:14,000 --> 00:10:15,250 to make a big banner. 238 00:10:15,291 --> 00:10:16,875 I enjoy big banners. 239 00:10:16,917 --> 00:10:18,581 And we're going to take it down to "Seattle Beat" 240 00:10:18,583 --> 00:10:20,081 and hold it up right in front of that window 241 00:10:20,083 --> 00:10:22,166 for this whole city to see. 242 00:10:22,208 --> 00:10:24,667 That's brilliant. Everybody watches "Seattle Beat." 243 00:10:24,709 --> 00:10:27,333 Uh-huh. Well, say thank you. 244 00:10:27,375 --> 00:10:28,875 Why? I thought of it. 245 00:10:28,917 --> 00:10:31,333 Yeah, but I thought of watching TV. 246 00:10:31,375 --> 00:10:33,125 Let's just go make the banner. 247 00:10:33,166 --> 00:10:38,000 All right. Let's a banner it up. 248 00:10:41,750 --> 00:10:44,750 Okay, okay, I'm coming, I'm coming. 249 00:10:44,792 --> 00:10:46,083 I'm going upstairs. I'm hurrying. 250 00:10:46,125 --> 00:10:47,581 I'm hurrying. I'm hurrying. I'm going. 251 00:10:47,583 --> 00:10:49,417 Oh, hey... 252 00:10:49,458 --> 00:10:53,458 ♪ ♪ 253 00:10:53,500 --> 00:10:55,331 Hurry, it's about to rain. I'm right behind you. 254 00:10:55,333 --> 00:10:58,625 And it's already raining. Come on. 255 00:10:58,667 --> 00:11:00,164 Pardon me, I'm really sorry. Oh, step aside here. 256 00:11:00,166 --> 00:11:01,625 Very sorry, I'm sorry about that. 257 00:11:01,667 --> 00:11:04,083 We're from the internet, and we just need to get through 258 00:11:04,125 --> 00:11:05,417 right now, so just move. Yeah. 259 00:11:05,458 --> 00:11:06,917 Hold it up high. 260 00:11:06,959 --> 00:11:09,083 Let's spread the word, baby. 261 00:11:09,125 --> 00:11:13,375 Move. We're from the internet. 262 00:11:13,417 --> 00:11:14,542 Get ready, Seattle. 263 00:11:17,542 --> 00:11:19,792 ♪ ♪ 264 00:11:19,834 --> 00:11:22,291 ♪ Spin, spin, spin around ♪ 265 00:11:22,333 --> 00:11:26,583 ♪ Spin, spin, spin around ♪ 266 00:11:26,625 --> 00:11:27,834 ♪ Spin around ♪ 267 00:11:27,875 --> 00:11:30,125 ♪ Spin, spin, spin around ♪ 268 00:11:30,166 --> 00:11:32,458 ♪ Spin, spin around ♪ 269 00:11:32,500 --> 00:11:35,834 ♪ Spin, spin around, spin, spin around ♪ 270 00:11:35,875 --> 00:11:38,041 ♪ Spin, spin, spin around ♪ 271 00:11:38,083 --> 00:11:39,875 And if you like what you just heard, 272 00:11:39,917 --> 00:11:44,625 you can catch that band live at the Showbox next weekend. 273 00:11:47,500 --> 00:11:50,000 That sign is messed up. 274 00:11:50,041 --> 00:11:53,083 Aww. 275 00:11:53,125 --> 00:11:56,333 We're going to have to touch Lewbert's wart. 276 00:12:04,667 --> 00:12:07,917 ♪ ♪ 277 00:12:07,959 --> 00:12:10,500 Okay, I've got the brown wire attached. 278 00:12:10,542 --> 00:12:12,500 Let's see if we've got a hot circuit. 279 00:12:12,542 --> 00:12:14,917 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. 280 00:12:14,959 --> 00:12:18,375 Why no... seven times? 281 00:12:18,417 --> 00:12:21,625 Because you're a child, and this is high-voltage stuff. 282 00:12:21,667 --> 00:12:24,125 And you're not even wearing safety goggles. 283 00:12:24,166 --> 00:12:25,832 See, you got to be extra careful when you're... 284 00:12:25,834 --> 00:12:28,000 Yeow! Ahh! 285 00:12:28,041 --> 00:12:30,166 Ahhhh! 286 00:12:30,208 --> 00:12:32,083 Ahh-ahh! 287 00:12:34,250 --> 00:12:37,917 That is why we wear safety goggles. 288 00:12:41,709 --> 00:12:43,625 Hey. 289 00:12:45,375 --> 00:12:46,458 Do I smell barbecue? 290 00:12:46,500 --> 00:12:49,834 No, that's my burning flesh. 291 00:12:49,875 --> 00:12:51,792 What's that? Soggy banner. 292 00:12:51,834 --> 00:12:53,917 Our plan to get more viewers didn't go too well. 293 00:12:53,959 --> 00:12:55,707 Yeah, like how the "Titanic" staying afloat 294 00:12:55,709 --> 00:12:59,083 didn't go too well. Oh, come on. 295 00:12:59,125 --> 00:13:01,959 Maybe a few people read our sign... before the rain 296 00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:04,542 ruined all our hard work and made us sad. 297 00:13:04,583 --> 00:13:09,208 Yeah, we could still win. Yeah, I don't think so. 298 00:13:09,250 --> 00:13:11,917 I think me and Spencer are going to win and you two 299 00:13:11,959 --> 00:13:13,959 are going to have to touch Lewbert's wart. 300 00:13:14,000 --> 00:13:16,500 I feel bad for you, Carly. Not for you. 301 00:13:20,250 --> 00:13:22,750 Sore loser. You haven't won yet. 302 00:13:22,792 --> 00:13:24,081 What are you guys planning to do? 303 00:13:24,083 --> 00:13:25,834 Oh, you'll find out. 304 00:13:25,875 --> 00:13:28,542 Now, if you'll excuse us, we have a contest to win. 305 00:13:28,583 --> 00:13:31,542 No offense, Carly. 306 00:13:31,583 --> 00:13:35,041 Come on. Let's go dry off. 307 00:13:35,083 --> 00:13:37,000 Remember, "iCarly" goes live in three hours. 308 00:13:37,041 --> 00:13:39,208 We'll be ready. To win. 309 00:13:39,250 --> 00:13:43,583 Still no offense, Carly. 310 00:13:43,625 --> 00:13:45,915 All right, kid, help me get this puppy down to the lobby. 311 00:13:45,917 --> 00:13:47,581 Okay, but then I've got to come back up here 312 00:13:47,583 --> 00:13:48,875 and help get ready for the show. 313 00:13:48,917 --> 00:13:50,000 I understand. 314 00:13:54,417 --> 00:13:56,250 Who's that? 315 00:13:56,291 --> 00:13:58,959 It's my buddy with the truck. Are you downstairs? 316 00:13:59,000 --> 00:14:00,500 Okay, we'll bring it downstairs, 317 00:14:00,542 --> 00:14:02,665 and then me and you can load it on the back of the truck. 318 00:14:02,667 --> 00:14:04,375 Okay, down in five. 319 00:14:04,417 --> 00:14:06,000 Now, let's get this sign on the road. 320 00:14:06,041 --> 00:14:08,750 Freddie? 321 00:14:08,792 --> 00:14:10,375 Yo, Freddo? 322 00:14:10,417 --> 00:14:12,959 Help me. 323 00:14:20,417 --> 00:14:25,083 ♪ ♪ 324 00:14:25,125 --> 00:14:26,750 Okay, on our last webcast, 325 00:14:26,792 --> 00:14:29,041 Sam and I told you to go to iCarly.com 326 00:14:29,083 --> 00:14:30,542 and click that feedback button. 327 00:14:30,583 --> 00:14:32,289 And man, you people clicked on that sucker 328 00:14:32,291 --> 00:14:35,125 like it was your job. 329 00:14:35,166 --> 00:14:36,792 So first we want to say thanks. 330 00:14:36,834 --> 00:14:39,583 Thanks. 331 00:14:39,625 --> 00:14:41,709 And second, we want to show you a video clip sent in 332 00:14:41,750 --> 00:14:44,125 by three "iCarly" viewers from Denver, Colorado. 333 00:14:44,166 --> 00:14:46,083 Freddie, play that clip. 334 00:14:46,125 --> 00:14:47,917 Some people might say please. 335 00:14:47,959 --> 00:14:50,125 Yeah, I didn't. 336 00:14:50,166 --> 00:14:52,083 Playback. 337 00:14:52,125 --> 00:14:54,917 Hey, Carly and Sam. We love your guys' web show. 338 00:14:54,959 --> 00:14:56,583 We love it. Yeah. 339 00:14:56,625 --> 00:14:59,458 Okay, we've got an important question for you. 340 00:14:59,500 --> 00:15:03,041 Can you drink spaghetti and meatballs? 341 00:15:03,083 --> 00:15:07,250 Spaghetti... Spaghetti and meatballs. 342 00:15:07,291 --> 00:15:09,333 Okay, we have no idea why 343 00:15:09,375 --> 00:15:12,458 that guy in the middle was wearing a bunny suit. 344 00:15:12,500 --> 00:15:15,875 But it did get our attention. And so to the question, 345 00:15:15,917 --> 00:15:18,917 can you drink spaghetti and meatballs? 346 00:15:18,959 --> 00:15:23,250 We gonna to find out. Okay, we invited 347 00:15:23,291 --> 00:15:24,959 the little boy who lives two floors down 348 00:15:25,000 --> 00:15:26,625 to come up here and be our little tester. 349 00:15:26,667 --> 00:15:29,041 So get out here, Emmett. Yeah! 350 00:15:32,291 --> 00:15:34,417 This is Emmett. He doesn't talk much. 351 00:15:34,458 --> 00:15:37,750 Isn't that right? 352 00:15:37,792 --> 00:15:40,166 See? 353 00:15:40,208 --> 00:15:42,709 Luckily, Emmett will eat or drink anything. 354 00:15:42,750 --> 00:15:46,375 Seriously. One time Sam dropped a quarter, Emmett ate it. 355 00:15:46,417 --> 00:15:48,750 I got it back three days later. 356 00:15:52,458 --> 00:15:54,083 Okay, Emmett, we want to know, 357 00:15:54,125 --> 00:15:58,291 can you drink spaghetti and meatballs? 358 00:15:58,333 --> 00:16:00,917 So first, we take this spaghetti. 359 00:16:00,959 --> 00:16:05,000 And the meatballs. You've got to love spherical meat. 360 00:16:05,041 --> 00:16:08,709 We put it in the blender. There we go. 361 00:16:08,750 --> 00:16:12,625 Ready? And we press "frappe." 362 00:16:16,875 --> 00:16:19,834 Ya ready, kid? 363 00:16:19,875 --> 00:16:22,875 Go for it. 364 00:16:32,917 --> 00:16:34,583 And there you have it. 365 00:16:34,625 --> 00:16:38,083 You can drink spaghetti and meatballs. 366 00:16:38,125 --> 00:16:41,625 Now get out of here, Emmett. You creep me out. 367 00:16:41,667 --> 00:16:44,000 Yes, you can have the rest. 368 00:16:48,458 --> 00:16:50,041 Okay, now we're going to do something 369 00:16:50,083 --> 00:16:51,667 we've never done before. 370 00:16:51,709 --> 00:16:53,667 Tell us what it is, Carly. 371 00:16:53,709 --> 00:16:55,458 We thought it'd be fun to have a contest. 372 00:16:55,500 --> 00:16:58,291 Me and Carly against our technical producer Freddie... 373 00:16:58,333 --> 00:17:00,542 Who teamed up with my older brother Spencer... 374 00:17:00,583 --> 00:17:02,623 To see which team could come up with the best idea 375 00:17:02,625 --> 00:17:04,333 to get more people to watch "iCarly." 376 00:17:04,375 --> 00:17:06,834 Sadly, our plan didn't go too great. 377 00:17:06,875 --> 00:17:08,625 Check it out. 378 00:17:08,667 --> 00:17:10,147 And if you like what you just heard, 379 00:17:10,166 --> 00:17:13,375 you can catch that band at the Showbox next weekend. 380 00:17:13,417 --> 00:17:14,583 So be sure... 381 00:17:19,041 --> 00:17:21,208 That sign is messed up. 382 00:17:21,250 --> 00:17:23,625 Aww. 383 00:17:23,667 --> 00:17:25,750 Okay, obviously that sign 384 00:17:25,792 --> 00:17:27,583 won't be getting us any more viewers. 385 00:17:27,625 --> 00:17:29,625 Our project failed... 386 00:17:29,667 --> 00:17:30,875 Aww. 387 00:17:30,917 --> 00:17:32,206 But luckily, we weren't the only ones 388 00:17:32,208 --> 00:17:33,917 with a plan this week. 389 00:17:33,959 --> 00:17:36,206 So let's go to my brother Spencer live on a remote camera 390 00:17:36,208 --> 00:17:38,083 to tell us about his and Freddie's idea. 391 00:17:38,125 --> 00:17:41,583 Okay, going to Spencer live. 392 00:17:45,542 --> 00:17:47,291 Hey, Spencer. How's it going out there? 393 00:17:47,333 --> 00:17:50,583 What's up, Spence? Spencer? 394 00:17:50,625 --> 00:17:54,166 Hello, are you there? Put the taco down. 395 00:17:54,208 --> 00:17:55,542 Can he hear us? 396 00:17:55,583 --> 00:17:59,417 Yeah, he should be able to. Oh, try now. 397 00:17:59,458 --> 00:18:02,542 Hey, Spencer! Ahh! 398 00:18:02,583 --> 00:18:06,583 Hey, Carly, Sam. 399 00:18:06,625 --> 00:18:10,417 You guys owe me half a taco. 400 00:18:10,458 --> 00:18:12,373 Yeah, so tell us what you're planning to do out there. 401 00:18:12,375 --> 00:18:15,542 Well, I'm currently standing by the interstate 402 00:18:15,583 --> 00:18:19,625 near the Lumpford on-ramp in downtown Seattle. 403 00:18:19,667 --> 00:18:23,834 And as you can see, there are literally many cars. 404 00:18:23,875 --> 00:18:26,083 Ooh, I'll show you. 405 00:18:30,125 --> 00:18:33,750 Literally many cars passing by every minute, 406 00:18:33,792 --> 00:18:36,417 which makes this the perfect place 407 00:18:36,458 --> 00:18:40,125 to hang a gigantic, luminescent sign 408 00:18:40,166 --> 00:18:43,875 like this. 409 00:18:43,917 --> 00:18:46,291 Behold the sign. 410 00:18:49,417 --> 00:18:52,417 Are you beholding it? 411 00:18:52,458 --> 00:18:55,500 Oh, we're beholding it. And since we're good sports, 412 00:18:55,542 --> 00:18:57,458 I have to say that sign does deserve a... 413 00:18:59,875 --> 00:19:01,792 Good job, Spencer. You too, Freddie. 414 00:19:01,834 --> 00:19:05,792 Thank you, Carly. In your face, Sam. 415 00:19:05,834 --> 00:19:08,709 Carly, Sam, you cannot understand 416 00:19:08,750 --> 00:19:12,125 how awesome this sign looks from out here. 417 00:19:12,166 --> 00:19:13,750 It is so dazzlingly bright. 418 00:19:13,792 --> 00:19:15,000 I swear it's like... 419 00:19:19,166 --> 00:19:21,041 What's going on out there, Spencer? 420 00:19:21,083 --> 00:19:25,083 Well, it seems our sign is so bright and dazzling, 421 00:19:25,125 --> 00:19:27,250 it distracted one of the drivers below. 422 00:19:29,333 --> 00:19:32,417 Actually, two of the drivers... 423 00:19:32,458 --> 00:19:34,291 three of the dri... 424 00:19:34,333 --> 00:19:37,959 Literally many of the drivers below are being distracted 425 00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:40,458 by our extremely dazzling sign. 426 00:19:40,500 --> 00:19:43,000 Quick, turn it off. Turn it off. 427 00:19:43,041 --> 00:19:46,375 Okay, I will now turn off the sign. 428 00:19:49,250 --> 00:19:50,500 That's not off. 429 00:19:50,542 --> 00:19:51,959 Spencer. Dude. 430 00:19:52,000 --> 00:19:55,041 Oh, man. I am pressing the buttons... 431 00:19:55,083 --> 00:19:56,208 Literally all of them... 432 00:19:56,250 --> 00:19:58,500 Trying to turn off the sign. 433 00:19:58,542 --> 00:20:00,417 You're going to overload the circuits. 434 00:20:06,250 --> 00:20:08,709 Pee on Carl? 435 00:20:08,750 --> 00:20:11,125 Turn that off. I am trying. 436 00:20:11,166 --> 00:20:15,417 It's the stupid cars! Don't look at the sign! 437 00:20:15,458 --> 00:20:17,375 Stop beholding the... 438 00:20:17,417 --> 00:20:20,208 I stepped on my taco! 439 00:20:29,709 --> 00:20:32,083 Wait, wait, and read this one. 440 00:20:33,667 --> 00:20:35,208 Unbelievable. Insane. 441 00:20:35,250 --> 00:20:36,792 I know. Can you believe this? 442 00:20:36,834 --> 00:20:39,792 I said, unbelievable. Oh, I'm sorry. 443 00:20:39,834 --> 00:20:42,500 I thought you said you were doofy and annoying. 444 00:20:42,542 --> 00:20:44,182 All right, one more comment like that... 445 00:20:46,250 --> 00:20:48,458 Try not to kill each other while I get the door. 446 00:20:55,417 --> 00:20:56,500 He belong to you? 447 00:20:56,542 --> 00:20:58,625 Yes, sir. He's my brother. 448 00:21:03,125 --> 00:21:05,000 Thank you, officer. Do you have any lotion? 449 00:21:05,041 --> 00:21:06,917 No. 450 00:21:06,959 --> 00:21:08,959 I'm letting you off with the warning. 451 00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:11,123 But the next time you cause one of the worst traffic jams 452 00:21:11,125 --> 00:21:13,125 in Seattle history, you will get arrested. 453 00:21:13,166 --> 00:21:16,792 I think that sounds fair. What were you thinking, 454 00:21:16,834 --> 00:21:20,000 putting up a sign telling people to pee on Carl? 455 00:21:20,041 --> 00:21:23,709 It was a terrible mistake, Officer... Carl. 456 00:21:31,750 --> 00:21:34,083 Well, that... 457 00:21:34,125 --> 00:21:39,083 And just so you know, I did have lotion. 458 00:21:39,125 --> 00:21:40,375 Cucumber melon. 459 00:21:46,291 --> 00:21:47,792 That was weird. Yeah, that was... 460 00:21:47,834 --> 00:21:49,792 Yep, that was not right. Yeah. 461 00:21:49,834 --> 00:21:53,208 Anyway, I'm sorry I kind of ruined your webcast tonight. 462 00:21:53,250 --> 00:21:55,125 You didn't. Come here. 463 00:21:55,166 --> 00:21:57,000 What? 464 00:21:57,041 --> 00:21:59,333 We were just reading the comment boards. 465 00:21:59,375 --> 00:22:01,792 Listen to this one. 466 00:22:01,834 --> 00:22:03,792 "The spaghetti in the blender made me LOL, 467 00:22:03,834 --> 00:22:05,458 but I swear when your brother's banner 468 00:22:05,500 --> 00:22:09,083 said 'Pee on Carl, ' I almost peed myself." 469 00:22:09,125 --> 00:22:10,873 Now read the one below it about "Seattle Beat." 470 00:22:10,875 --> 00:22:12,291 Oh, yeah. Here. 471 00:22:12,333 --> 00:22:15,041 "Carly, loved seeing you and Sam on 'Seattle Beat.' 472 00:22:15,083 --> 00:22:17,208 Sorry about the web banner, but that was hilarious. 473 00:22:17,250 --> 00:22:19,415 I'm going to forward that clip to every kid in my school. 474 00:22:19,417 --> 00:22:20,792 Rock on, 'iCarly.'" 475 00:22:20,834 --> 00:22:23,041 Sweet. How many comments like that? 476 00:22:23,083 --> 00:22:24,667 Tons. People are linking to us... 477 00:22:24,709 --> 00:22:26,917 Telling their friends. Okay, so wait, wait, wait. 478 00:22:26,959 --> 00:22:29,625 We all failed miserably trying to get you guys 479 00:22:29,667 --> 00:22:32,625 more viewers for "iCarly," 480 00:22:32,667 --> 00:22:36,083 and yet it is precisely those miserable failures 481 00:22:36,125 --> 00:22:39,208 that are getting you guys more viewers for "iCarly." 482 00:22:39,250 --> 00:22:40,500 Right. That's it. 483 00:22:40,542 --> 00:22:43,417 Insanity. Oh, hey, 484 00:22:43,458 --> 00:22:45,000 we almost forgot the best part. 485 00:22:45,041 --> 00:22:46,417 Yeah? What? 486 00:22:46,458 --> 00:22:47,957 Since all of us pretty much lost the contest, 487 00:22:47,959 --> 00:22:50,250 none of us have to touch Lewbert's wart. 488 00:22:50,291 --> 00:22:51,709 Oh, yeah. That's right. 489 00:22:51,750 --> 00:22:53,500 Well, then I say let's go get us 490 00:22:53,542 --> 00:22:56,625 some low-fat cheeseless vegetarian pizza. 491 00:22:56,667 --> 00:22:59,750 Yeah! Whoo! 492 00:22:59,792 --> 00:23:01,125 And some cucumber melon lotion? 493 00:23:01,166 --> 00:23:03,291 Please. 494 00:23:09,709 --> 00:23:11,792 Hey guys, I love "iCarly." 495 00:23:11,834 --> 00:23:14,542 Now watch me pick my nose with my toes. 496 00:23:32,041 --> 00:23:33,834 Ta-da! 497 00:23:34,959 --> 00:23:36,625 Mmm. 36004

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