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1
00:00:10,750 --> 00:00:12,583
Check out our web show
at iCarly.com.
2
00:00:14,917 --> 00:00:16,208
Hey, watch "iCarly"
this weekend.
3
00:00:16,250 --> 00:00:17,250
It's gonna be hot.
4
00:00:17,291 --> 00:00:19,083
ICarly.com.
5
00:00:21,959 --> 00:00:24,333
Hey, Wesley,
watch iCarly this weekend.
6
00:00:24,375 --> 00:00:25,750
It's gonna be a great show.
7
00:00:25,792 --> 00:00:27,250
ICarly.Com.
8
00:00:32,333 --> 00:00:33,458
Okay, see ya!
9
00:00:36,792 --> 00:00:38,625
Hey, check out our web show
at iCarly.com.
10
00:00:38,667 --> 00:00:39,709
Thanks.
11
00:00:43,125 --> 00:00:45,041
Hey, Jeremy,
12
00:00:45,083 --> 00:00:46,206
you've heard of our web show,
right?
13
00:00:46,208 --> 00:00:47,792
Sure.
14
00:00:47,834 --> 00:00:52,166
I've seen every episo...
15
00:00:52,208 --> 00:00:53,208
Flyer?
16
00:00:53,250 --> 00:00:55,041
Yes, please.
17
00:00:57,375 --> 00:00:59,417
Thank you.
18
00:00:59,458 --> 00:01:02,041
You keep that.
19
00:01:02,083 --> 00:01:03,250
You're nice.
20
00:01:07,834 --> 00:01:09,375
Didn't he have a cold last week?
21
00:01:09,417 --> 00:01:11,542
Last week,
the week before that...
22
00:01:11,583 --> 00:01:12,875
Why are we talking weeks?
23
00:01:12,917 --> 00:01:14,500
That lump's been blowing
his nose
24
00:01:14,542 --> 00:01:16,208
non-stop since first grade.
25
00:01:17,417 --> 00:01:19,583
Hey, Tasha, check out
our web show this weekend.
26
00:01:20,917 --> 00:01:22,500
ICarly.com?
27
00:01:22,542 --> 00:01:24,625
That's us.
We rock.
28
00:01:24,667 --> 00:01:27,166
Um, if your web show
was worth "checking out,"
29
00:01:27,208 --> 00:01:29,834
I'd have read about it
on Nevelocity.com.
30
00:01:29,875 --> 00:01:31,832
Hey, just 'cause our show
wasn't reviewed on Nevelocity
31
00:01:31,834 --> 00:01:33,250
doesn't mean it's not cool.
32
00:01:33,291 --> 00:01:35,041
Actually, it does.
33
00:01:35,083 --> 00:01:36,832
Nevel writes about everything
that's cool on the web,
34
00:01:36,834 --> 00:01:39,625
and since he's never written
anything about iCarly,
35
00:01:39,667 --> 00:01:41,333
I guess your web show's lame.
36
00:01:43,500 --> 00:01:44,625
She irks me.
37
00:01:46,500 --> 00:01:49,041
I wanna do bad things
to that chick.
38
00:01:49,083 --> 00:01:50,166
You should.
39
00:01:50,208 --> 00:01:51,458
I will.
Cool.
40
00:01:51,500 --> 00:01:52,625
What we you gonna...
41
00:01:52,667 --> 00:01:53,748
Whoa! Whoa! What are you doing?
42
00:01:53,750 --> 00:01:56,041
I didn't mean me! Look out!
43
00:01:59,750 --> 00:02:03,500
In five, four, three, two...
44
00:02:05,875 --> 00:02:08,250
♪ I know, you see ♪
45
00:02:08,291 --> 00:02:09,417
♪ Somehow the world ♪
46
00:02:09,458 --> 00:02:10,625
♪ Will change for me ♪
47
00:02:10,667 --> 00:02:14,917
♪ And be so wonderful ♪
48
00:02:14,959 --> 00:02:17,250
♪ Live life, breathe air ♪
49
00:02:17,291 --> 00:02:19,875
♪ I know somehow
we're gonna get there ♪
50
00:02:19,917 --> 00:02:24,583
♪ And feel so wonderful ♪
51
00:02:24,625 --> 00:02:28,333
♪ It's all for real ♪
52
00:02:28,375 --> 00:02:30,041
♪ I'm telling you
just how I feel ♪
53
00:02:30,083 --> 00:02:32,458
♪ So wake up the members ♪
54
00:02:32,500 --> 00:02:34,250
♪ Of my nation ♪
55
00:02:34,291 --> 00:02:35,709
♪ It's your time to be ♪
56
00:02:35,750 --> 00:02:36,834
♪ There's no chance ♪
57
00:02:36,875 --> 00:02:38,667
♪ Unless you take one ♪
58
00:02:38,709 --> 00:02:40,291
♪ And it's time to see ♪
59
00:02:40,333 --> 00:02:41,625
♪ The brighter side ♪
60
00:02:41,667 --> 00:02:44,834
♪ Of every situation ♪
61
00:02:44,875 --> 00:02:46,333
♪ Some things are
meant to be ♪
62
00:02:46,375 --> 00:02:47,750
♪ So give me your best ♪
63
00:02:47,792 --> 00:02:49,917
♪ And leave the rest to me ♪
64
00:02:49,959 --> 00:02:52,583
♪ Leave it all to me ♪
65
00:02:52,625 --> 00:02:54,583
♪ Leave it all to me ♪
66
00:02:54,625 --> 00:02:57,417
♪ Just leave it all to me ♪
67
00:03:06,667 --> 00:03:07,750
Hey, kiddo!
68
00:03:09,792 --> 00:03:12,625
I'm home, and I got bags!
69
00:03:14,500 --> 00:03:16,333
Oh, yay, you went shopping.
What'd ya get?
70
00:03:16,375 --> 00:03:18,333
Well, y'see...
71
00:03:18,375 --> 00:03:21,208
Butter. Butter.
72
00:03:21,250 --> 00:03:22,291
Butter...
73
00:03:22,333 --> 00:03:25,417
Oh, look. Butter.
74
00:03:25,458 --> 00:03:26,542
I bought a lot of butter.
75
00:03:26,583 --> 00:03:28,291
Clearly. This all you got?
76
00:03:28,333 --> 00:03:29,834
No.
77
00:03:29,875 --> 00:03:31,415
I also got this thingy
that makes the water
78
00:03:31,417 --> 00:03:33,208
in your toilet turn blue.
79
00:03:33,250 --> 00:03:35,208
Great.
80
00:03:35,250 --> 00:03:38,750
So for dinner we can have
butter and blue toilet water.
81
00:03:38,792 --> 00:03:40,834
This butter is not for eating.
82
00:03:40,875 --> 00:03:43,417
I got hired to create
a big sculpture.
83
00:03:43,458 --> 00:03:44,750
Made of butter.
84
00:03:44,792 --> 00:03:46,166
Yeah, for the bread convention.
85
00:03:46,208 --> 00:03:47,667
See...
86
00:03:47,709 --> 00:03:49,083
It's Toasty the Baker!
87
00:03:50,375 --> 00:03:52,500
He's the mascot,
and they hired me
88
00:03:52,542 --> 00:03:55,375
to make a giant sculpture
of him out of butter.
89
00:03:55,417 --> 00:03:57,583
Ahh.
Ask me what I'm getting paid.
90
00:03:57,625 --> 00:03:58,333
Okay, what are you...
91
00:03:58,375 --> 00:04:00,250
Money, baby!
92
00:04:00,291 --> 00:04:02,792
Sweet!
Sweet like corn syrup!
93
00:04:02,834 --> 00:04:04,750
High fructose?
The highest!
94
00:04:06,250 --> 00:04:08,291
Okay, so what are we doing
for dinner?
95
00:04:08,333 --> 00:04:10,166
What's that little
tween belly hungry for?
96
00:04:10,208 --> 00:04:11,333
Whatever.
97
00:04:11,375 --> 00:04:12,875
First, just lemme finish
this e-mail.
98
00:04:12,917 --> 00:04:15,208
Sure. Who ya writing?
99
00:04:15,250 --> 00:04:17,458
This guy, Nevel,
who runs a big website.
100
00:04:17,500 --> 00:04:19,000
Nevelocity.
Yeah.
101
00:04:19,041 --> 00:04:20,707
I'm trying to get him
to check out our next Webcast
102
00:04:20,709 --> 00:04:21,959
and maybe write a review of it.
103
00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:24,000
Oh, that'd be killer.
104
00:04:24,041 --> 00:04:26,166
Everybody reads Nevelocity.
105
00:04:26,208 --> 00:04:27,083
No kidding.
106
00:04:27,125 --> 00:04:30,625
"Please write back. Carly."
107
00:04:30,667 --> 00:04:32,583
There. All sent. Let's hit it.
108
00:04:32,625 --> 00:04:36,083
Um, well, yeah,
but first I was kinda hoping...
109
00:04:36,125 --> 00:04:37,498
You wanna go make
the toilet water turn blue?
110
00:04:37,500 --> 00:04:38,875
So much.
Do it.
111
00:04:46,417 --> 00:04:47,792
Yeah!
112
00:04:50,667 --> 00:04:51,834
Happy?
Uh-huh.
113
00:04:56,792 --> 00:05:01,125
In five, four, three, two.
114
00:05:01,166 --> 00:05:02,834
Hey! Welcome to iCarly!
115
00:05:02,875 --> 00:05:05,417
Check out our
flashy new graphic!
116
00:05:05,458 --> 00:05:09,000
Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo!
Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo!
117
00:05:10,375 --> 00:05:11,125
Okay! I'm Carly...
118
00:05:11,166 --> 00:05:12,709
I'm Sam...
119
00:05:12,750 --> 00:05:14,248
And we like to draw families
on our toes!
120
00:05:14,250 --> 00:05:15,375
Observe!
121
00:05:20,583 --> 00:05:21,667
Uh-oh.
122
00:05:21,709 --> 00:05:23,500
Earthquake!
123
00:05:30,291 --> 00:05:31,873
Okay, if you thought
that video was cool...
124
00:05:31,875 --> 00:05:33,542
Check out this kid
from New York.
125
00:05:33,583 --> 00:05:34,959
He's a crump dancer.
126
00:05:35,000 --> 00:05:36,959
He enjoys crumping.
127
00:05:37,000 --> 00:05:39,458
And he does it covered
in peanut butter.
128
00:05:39,500 --> 00:05:41,458
Crump it up, peanut boy!
129
00:05:41,500 --> 00:05:44,291
This is for you.
130
00:05:47,375 --> 00:05:54,166
♪ ♪
131
00:05:59,458 --> 00:06:01,917
iCarly.com.
132
00:06:01,959 --> 00:06:03,125
Unbelievable.
133
00:06:03,166 --> 00:06:04,709
But is he smooth or crunchy?
134
00:06:04,750 --> 00:06:06,834
And does he have a girlfriend
covered in jelly?
135
00:06:06,875 --> 00:06:08,750
Important questions!
Important questions!
136
00:06:10,667 --> 00:06:13,208
Okay, next on iCarly,
we're gonna...
137
00:06:13,250 --> 00:06:15,625
Um, who's coming up
the elevator?
138
00:06:15,667 --> 00:06:16,750
Oh, I, uh...
139
00:06:27,667 --> 00:06:28,959
I ordered Chinese food.
140
00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:30,500
During the show?
141
00:06:30,542 --> 00:06:32,542
There's no wrong time
to eat an egg roll.
142
00:06:32,583 --> 00:06:34,667
Ahh!
143
00:06:34,709 --> 00:06:36,373
Okay, looks like
we have a surprise visitor
144
00:06:36,375 --> 00:06:38,667
here on iCarly.
145
00:06:38,709 --> 00:06:40,500
Hi, food delivery guy!
146
00:06:40,542 --> 00:06:42,333
What's your name?
147
00:06:42,375 --> 00:06:43,667
Chuck.
148
00:06:43,709 --> 00:06:46,208
Chuck.
Chuck.
149
00:06:46,250 --> 00:06:48,208
Have you ever been interviewed,
Chuck?
150
00:06:48,250 --> 00:06:49,834
No.
151
00:06:49,875 --> 00:06:52,500
So, Chuck, where ya from?
152
00:06:52,542 --> 00:06:53,834
Wisconsin.
153
00:07:00,542 --> 00:07:02,375
Are you in college?
154
00:07:02,417 --> 00:07:03,542
No.
155
00:07:03,583 --> 00:07:05,500
Okay. Um... Oh!
156
00:07:05,542 --> 00:07:07,164
What's the weirdest thing
that's ever happened to you
157
00:07:07,166 --> 00:07:11,500
while you were delivering food?
158
00:07:11,542 --> 00:07:14,709
I don't know.
159
00:07:14,750 --> 00:07:17,667
Chuck, you're very boring.
160
00:07:17,709 --> 00:07:20,875
And that means
it's time for this.
161
00:07:20,917 --> 00:07:24,208
Random dancing!
162
00:07:27,333 --> 00:07:34,375
♪ ♪
163
00:07:41,667 --> 00:07:43,458
Our most important webcast ever,
164
00:07:43,500 --> 00:07:44,959
and you bring
on a food delivery guy
165
00:07:45,000 --> 00:07:47,333
who was born
without a personality.
166
00:07:47,375 --> 00:07:49,041
The show was still awesome.
167
00:07:49,083 --> 00:07:52,250
Hey, you guys got an e-mail
from Nevel Papperman.
168
00:07:52,291 --> 00:07:53,625
Nevelocity!
169
00:07:53,667 --> 00:07:56,583
Move!
Aah!
170
00:07:56,625 --> 00:07:58,333
C'mon! What'd the man say?
171
00:07:58,375 --> 00:07:59,792
He says he loved our web show,
172
00:07:59,834 --> 00:08:02,458
and he wants to interview me.
173
00:08:02,500 --> 00:08:03,834
Oh, my God!
174
00:08:03,875 --> 00:08:05,581
I can't believe it!
Yes! Isn't that cool?
175
00:08:05,583 --> 00:08:08,041
ICarly is on its way, baby.
If Nevel interviews you...
176
00:08:08,083 --> 00:08:11,625
Hey! Your toilet water's blue!
177
00:08:11,667 --> 00:08:14,083
Look it!
178
00:08:14,125 --> 00:08:16,625
I'll get more.
179
00:08:16,667 --> 00:08:18,834
Now he gets a personality.
180
00:08:20,959 --> 00:08:23,333
Who's the dude
playing in our toilet?
181
00:08:42,041 --> 00:08:43,125
Hey.
182
00:08:43,166 --> 00:08:44,458
Hmm?
183
00:08:44,500 --> 00:08:46,166
Why is it so cold in here?
184
00:08:46,208 --> 00:08:47,568
Oh, I turned
the air conditioner up
185
00:08:47,583 --> 00:08:49,375
so my butter sculpture
won't melt.
186
00:08:49,417 --> 00:08:51,623
Ah. So you ready to drive me
to Nevel's for my interview?
187
00:08:51,625 --> 00:08:54,333
Yep. Let's hit it.
188
00:09:00,250 --> 00:09:01,417
My hands have, um...
189
00:09:01,458 --> 00:09:03,458
Butter?
Yeah.
190
00:09:03,500 --> 00:09:07,208
Uh. I got 'em though.
191
00:09:14,875 --> 00:09:15,834
Let's go!
192
00:09:15,875 --> 00:09:17,083
Let's.
193
00:09:21,750 --> 00:09:23,458
I really think
you should wait in the car.
194
00:09:23,500 --> 00:09:25,041
No way.
You don't know this Nevel guy.
195
00:09:25,083 --> 00:09:27,291
What if he's a weirdo?
196
00:09:27,333 --> 00:09:29,750
Aww, I got butter on my elbow.
197
00:09:35,959 --> 00:09:36,959
Spence?
Mm-hmm?
198
00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:38,333
It's not possible!
199
00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:45,834
Hi, you must be Carly.
200
00:09:45,875 --> 00:09:47,959
Yes, ma'am. And this is
my brother, Spencer.
201
00:09:48,000 --> 00:09:49,440
Nice to meet you.
Please come in.
202
00:09:53,542 --> 00:09:55,542
Nevel is so excited to meet you.
203
00:09:55,583 --> 00:09:57,331
He has been talking
about your web show all week.
204
00:09:57,333 --> 00:09:58,583
He just loves it.
205
00:09:58,625 --> 00:09:59,832
Well, I'm a big fan
of his website.
206
00:09:59,834 --> 00:10:01,250
Oh, thank you.
207
00:10:01,291 --> 00:10:02,790
How long have you
and Nevel been married?
208
00:10:02,792 --> 00:10:04,417
Married?
209
00:10:04,458 --> 00:10:06,709
I'm sorry, I think
you might be mistaking him
210
00:10:06,750 --> 00:10:07,875
for someone a little...
211
00:10:07,917 --> 00:10:11,250
Carly Shay, live and in person.
212
00:10:11,291 --> 00:10:13,375
It is so exciting to meet you.
213
00:10:13,417 --> 00:10:15,500
I'm Nevel Papperman.
214
00:10:15,542 --> 00:10:17,542
You're Nevel?
You're just a little kid.
215
00:10:17,583 --> 00:10:19,792
He's so cute.
216
00:10:19,834 --> 00:10:21,250
I created and now run
217
00:10:21,291 --> 00:10:23,083
one of the world's most
visited websites,
218
00:10:23,125 --> 00:10:26,083
which gets over five million
page views per day.
219
00:10:26,125 --> 00:10:27,834
I'm not "cute."
Yeah, you are.
220
00:10:27,875 --> 00:10:30,792
I can tell 'cause I wanna
mess up your hair.
221
00:10:30,834 --> 00:10:32,333
Who's cute?
222
00:10:32,375 --> 00:10:34,625
Who's a cute Nevel?
223
00:10:34,667 --> 00:10:37,333
Who gets
five million page views?
224
00:10:37,375 --> 00:10:38,625
You do!
225
00:10:38,667 --> 00:10:40,166
Mother...
226
00:10:40,208 --> 00:10:42,208
Uh, why don't you and I
go in the kitchen?
227
00:10:42,250 --> 00:10:43,458
I'll make you some tea.
228
00:10:43,500 --> 00:10:44,750
Will there be lemon?
Yes.
229
00:10:44,792 --> 00:10:46,166
All right then.
Come on.
230
00:10:53,208 --> 00:10:54,417
Please. Sit.
231
00:10:56,709 --> 00:10:59,083
Hand sanitizer?
Uhhh...
232
00:10:59,125 --> 00:11:00,625
Do you know
that trillions of germs
233
00:11:00,667 --> 00:11:02,250
are living
on your hand-skin right now?
234
00:11:02,291 --> 00:11:03,834
Really?
235
00:11:03,875 --> 00:11:06,125
Thanks.
236
00:11:06,166 --> 00:11:08,125
Sure.
237
00:11:08,166 --> 00:11:10,625
You know, I was really
impressed with your web show.
238
00:11:10,667 --> 00:11:12,709
Thanks so much.
That really means a lot.
239
00:11:12,750 --> 00:11:14,625
I know.
240
00:11:14,667 --> 00:11:16,458
I think my readers
will be very interested
241
00:11:16,500 --> 00:11:17,792
to learn more about you.
242
00:11:17,834 --> 00:11:19,458
What type of shampoo do you use?
243
00:11:19,500 --> 00:11:20,542
Huh?
244
00:11:26,166 --> 00:11:30,208
Kiwi salon with Jasmine,
for normal to dry hair?
245
00:11:30,250 --> 00:11:33,625
Wow, you have an amazing nose.
246
00:11:33,667 --> 00:11:35,959
Yes.
247
00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:37,291
You must love flowers.
248
00:11:37,333 --> 00:11:38,959
Oh, I hate flowers.
249
00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:40,750
Bugs sit upon them and make poo.
250
00:11:40,792 --> 00:11:42,834
Okay.
251
00:11:42,875 --> 00:11:44,917
Oh, hmm...
252
00:11:44,959 --> 00:11:46,959
Look at this.
253
00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:50,458
It's an X-ray of my brain.
254
00:11:50,500 --> 00:11:52,375
Ah, interesting.
255
00:11:53,542 --> 00:11:56,709
Big, isn't it?
256
00:11:56,750 --> 00:11:58,667
Yeah. That's one beefy brain
you got there.
257
00:12:00,291 --> 00:12:02,250
Thank you.
258
00:12:02,291 --> 00:12:03,834
Are you hungry?
No.
259
00:12:03,875 --> 00:12:05,750
I'll fetch you a snack.
But...
260
00:12:15,917 --> 00:12:17,250
Yeah?
Sam! Where are you?
261
00:12:17,291 --> 00:12:18,625
Your house, watching TV.
262
00:12:18,667 --> 00:12:19,959
Well, you're not gonna
believe...
263
00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:21,834
My house?
How'd you get in?
264
00:12:21,875 --> 00:12:24,458
I know where you and Spencer
hide the key.
265
00:12:24,500 --> 00:12:26,041
How's the interview going?
266
00:12:26,083 --> 00:12:27,917
Weirdly. First of all,
Nevel's not a man.
267
00:12:27,959 --> 00:12:30,166
He's a kid.
What? How old?
268
00:12:30,208 --> 00:12:31,959
Like eleven. And he's creepy.
269
00:12:32,000 --> 00:12:33,834
Well, be nice to him.
270
00:12:33,875 --> 00:12:35,540
You know how important
this review is for our show.
271
00:12:35,542 --> 00:12:37,375
Millions of people
read his site.
272
00:12:37,417 --> 00:12:38,875
Don't upset the kid.
273
00:12:38,917 --> 00:12:40,875
But what if he...
274
00:12:40,917 --> 00:12:42,291
Carly?
275
00:12:46,500 --> 00:12:50,208
Man, why's it so cold in here?
276
00:13:12,834 --> 00:13:14,333
I brought you crackers
277
00:13:14,375 --> 00:13:16,041
and some of my mother's
homemade tapenade.
278
00:13:16,083 --> 00:13:17,792
Tapenade?
279
00:13:17,834 --> 00:13:19,373
It's a spread made of olives,
garlic, and capers.
280
00:13:19,375 --> 00:13:20,583
Try some.
281
00:13:20,625 --> 00:13:21,917
Oh, I really don't think
282
00:13:21,959 --> 00:13:23,792
tapenade's something I'd,
you know...
283
00:13:27,542 --> 00:13:29,208
Oh, my god, that's awesome!
284
00:13:29,250 --> 00:13:31,375
Isn't it?
285
00:13:31,417 --> 00:13:32,583
Please, sit.
286
00:13:37,875 --> 00:13:39,959
Do you think fireplaces
are romantic?
287
00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:42,166
Uh, yeah, I guess.
288
00:13:42,208 --> 00:13:45,166
You've guessed correctly.
289
00:13:55,208 --> 00:13:57,625
Do you like music?
290
00:13:57,667 --> 00:14:00,583
Uh, yeah, sure.
291
00:14:03,917 --> 00:14:09,542
♪ ♪
292
00:14:09,583 --> 00:14:11,041
Would you like to dance?
293
00:14:11,083 --> 00:14:12,375
Dance?
294
00:14:15,792 --> 00:14:17,417
Look, I don't wanna sound rude,
295
00:14:17,458 --> 00:14:18,978
but I really didn't come here
to dance.
296
00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:20,331
Could you just interview me
about the web...
297
00:14:20,333 --> 00:14:22,375
Nevel!
298
00:14:22,417 --> 00:14:24,959
I stole a kiss upon your cheek,
299
00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:26,792
and now another kiss I seek.
300
00:14:26,834 --> 00:14:28,417
Seek some tapenade!
301
00:14:31,750 --> 00:14:33,166
Spencer!
302
00:14:35,792 --> 00:14:38,458
You shouldn't have done that,
Carly Shay!
303
00:14:38,500 --> 00:14:39,333
You'll rue this day!
304
00:14:39,375 --> 00:14:40,875
You'll rue it!
305
00:14:48,500 --> 00:14:50,166
You got a little...
306
00:14:58,375 --> 00:15:00,417
Nevel's only eleven?
307
00:15:00,458 --> 00:15:03,417
Yes, now stop speaking.
308
00:15:03,458 --> 00:15:04,917
Tell us what happened.
309
00:15:04,959 --> 00:15:06,373
Okay, I got there,
Nevel sat next to me,
310
00:15:06,375 --> 00:15:07,709
he sniffed my hair,
311
00:15:07,750 --> 00:15:09,250
he showed me
an X-ray of his brain,
312
00:15:09,291 --> 00:15:10,375
he tried to make me dance,
313
00:15:10,417 --> 00:15:11,542
and then he kissed me!
314
00:15:11,583 --> 00:15:13,417
Whoa! He kissed you?
315
00:15:13,458 --> 00:15:15,375
That jerk!
316
00:15:15,417 --> 00:15:18,250
Come show my lips
exactly what he did.
317
00:15:18,291 --> 00:15:20,041
Yeah, I don't think so.
318
00:15:20,083 --> 00:15:22,375
You just keep making out
with your stuffed animals.
319
00:15:24,083 --> 00:15:25,750
Tell us what happened
after he kissed you.
320
00:15:25,792 --> 00:15:27,834
I pushed tapenade in his face,
321
00:15:27,875 --> 00:15:30,083
and then he got all furious
and said I'd "rue the day."
322
00:15:30,125 --> 00:15:31,583
What is "tapenade"?
323
00:15:31,625 --> 00:15:33,248
A spread made of olives,
garlic, and capers.
324
00:15:33,250 --> 00:15:34,834
Eww.
Gross.
325
00:15:34,875 --> 00:15:37,083
It's actually really good,
I can't explain it.
326
00:15:37,125 --> 00:15:39,625
And what did he mean,
you'd "rue the day?"
327
00:15:39,667 --> 00:15:40,875
Yeah, what does "rue" mean?
328
00:15:40,917 --> 00:15:42,208
No one knows!
329
00:15:42,250 --> 00:15:43,667
I got it right here.
330
00:15:43,709 --> 00:15:45,375
"Roux.
331
00:15:45,417 --> 00:15:48,792
A mixture of fat and flour
used to make sauces and soups."
332
00:15:51,834 --> 00:15:54,625
Nevel called you a fat flower?
333
00:15:54,667 --> 00:15:56,375
Try spelling it differently.
334
00:15:59,083 --> 00:16:00,250
Oh, okay, here.
335
00:16:00,291 --> 00:16:02,125
"Rue. To regret.
336
00:16:02,166 --> 00:16:04,333
To wish that something
had never been done."
337
00:16:04,375 --> 00:16:05,333
Uh-oh.
338
00:16:05,375 --> 00:16:06,667
You know what this means?
339
00:16:06,709 --> 00:16:08,250
'Course.
He's gonna make me regret
340
00:16:08,291 --> 00:16:09,750
shoving tapenade in his face
341
00:16:09,792 --> 00:16:12,291
by trashing iCarly
on his stupid website.
342
00:16:12,333 --> 00:16:14,250
We're dead.
343
00:16:14,291 --> 00:16:15,959
I'm gonna go
scrub his creepy lip residue
344
00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:17,000
off my cheek.
345
00:16:22,750 --> 00:16:24,667
Hey, why isn't it cold in here?
346
00:16:24,709 --> 00:16:26,917
Toasty the Baker. Good God!
347
00:16:28,458 --> 00:16:30,333
Aah! What?
348
00:16:33,375 --> 00:16:34,750
Toasty!
349
00:16:37,750 --> 00:16:39,750
Gross. It's like a giant baby
threw up.
350
00:16:42,125 --> 00:16:45,083
Why?
351
00:16:45,125 --> 00:16:46,709
I told you
not to turn the heat up.
352
00:16:46,750 --> 00:16:49,125
What?
I never even...
353
00:16:49,166 --> 00:16:51,123
It's too late for apologies.
But I didn't turn the...
354
00:16:51,125 --> 00:16:52,959
It's okay! It's okay.
355
00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:56,291
I just need a mop and bucket...
356
00:16:56,333 --> 00:16:57,792
and 28 more pounds of butter!
357
00:17:01,583 --> 00:17:03,250
Spencer.
Mrs. Benson.
358
00:17:03,291 --> 00:17:04,917
Freddie, your mom's here!
359
00:17:04,959 --> 00:17:06,500
I came over
because I heard screaming.
360
00:17:06,542 --> 00:17:08,458
Freddie, are you all right?
361
00:17:08,500 --> 00:17:09,500
Yes, Mom.
362
00:17:09,542 --> 00:17:10,792
He's fine, but I really...
363
00:17:10,834 --> 00:17:13,792
You know he's allergic to fruit?
364
00:17:13,834 --> 00:17:17,792
Aw! Who's got a fruit problem?
365
00:17:17,834 --> 00:17:19,709
Not me.
I am not allergic to fruit!
366
00:17:19,750 --> 00:17:21,083
Well, what if you were?
367
00:17:21,125 --> 00:17:22,000
He'd probably
give you an orange,
368
00:17:22,041 --> 00:17:24,542
and then
your face would puff up.
369
00:17:24,583 --> 00:17:26,667
I would love that.
370
00:17:26,709 --> 00:17:27,875
Look, I gave him no fruit.
371
00:17:27,917 --> 00:17:29,039
Now please, I'm out of butter...
372
00:17:29,041 --> 00:17:29,959
False!
373
00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:31,667
I saw you come home yesterday
374
00:17:31,709 --> 00:17:32,583
carrying grocery bags
filled with butter.
375
00:17:32,625 --> 00:17:33,959
You spied on me?
376
00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:35,289
No, I just happened
to be glancing
377
00:17:35,291 --> 00:17:36,458
through my peephole.
378
00:17:36,500 --> 00:17:37,959
That butter's gone.
379
00:17:38,000 --> 00:17:39,166
And so am I.
380
00:17:39,208 --> 00:17:41,041
What've you done
with all that butter?
381
00:17:41,083 --> 00:17:43,250
Freddie, I want you to take
a bubble bath tonight.
382
00:17:43,291 --> 00:17:45,792
Spencer!
383
00:17:45,834 --> 00:17:48,083
I didn't give him any fruit!
384
00:17:50,500 --> 00:17:51,792
Cool mom.
385
00:17:55,667 --> 00:17:58,667
Nevelocity.com.
386
00:17:58,709 --> 00:18:00,083
This is gonna be bad.
387
00:18:00,125 --> 00:18:01,166
Maybe not.
388
00:18:01,208 --> 00:18:02,500
He said I'd rue the day,
389
00:18:02,542 --> 00:18:04,422
and I have a feeling
the ruing's about to begin.
390
00:18:06,250 --> 00:18:07,957
Just 'cause he hates you
personally doesn't mean
391
00:18:07,959 --> 00:18:10,125
he's gonna give our show
a bad review.
392
00:18:10,166 --> 00:18:12,125
Uh...
393
00:18:12,166 --> 00:18:13,834
get ready to rue.
394
00:18:13,875 --> 00:18:15,166
You found Nevel's review?
395
00:18:15,208 --> 00:18:16,750
Read it!
396
00:18:16,792 --> 00:18:18,333
"ICarly,
or, as it should be called,
397
00:18:18,375 --> 00:18:19,542
iBoring."
398
00:18:19,583 --> 00:18:20,917
You see?
Boring?
399
00:18:20,959 --> 00:18:22,542
Keep going. Let's hear it.
400
00:18:22,583 --> 00:18:24,250
"This webcast stars Carly Shay,
401
00:18:24,291 --> 00:18:26,709
an unappealing
13-year-old girl."
402
00:18:27,709 --> 00:18:29,500
Yeah, if I'm so "unappealing"
403
00:18:29,542 --> 00:18:30,623
then why were you
sniffing my hair
404
00:18:30,625 --> 00:18:31,917
and chomping on my cheek?
405
00:18:33,917 --> 00:18:36,083
Keep going.
"My advice,
406
00:18:36,125 --> 00:18:38,250
"If you're trying to decide
between watching iCarly
407
00:18:38,291 --> 00:18:40,667
and going to prison,
choose prison.
408
00:18:40,709 --> 00:18:41,917
You'll have more fun in jail
409
00:18:41,959 --> 00:18:45,166
than you ever will
at iCarly.lame."
410
00:18:45,208 --> 00:18:46,834
That's so unfair.
411
00:18:46,875 --> 00:18:48,750
At least he didn't call you
a fat flower.
412
00:18:50,542 --> 00:18:52,422
Yeah, but now everybody's
gonna read that review
413
00:18:52,458 --> 00:18:55,125
and stop watching us.
414
00:18:55,166 --> 00:18:56,166
No, they're not.
415
00:18:56,208 --> 00:18:57,834
Why aren't they?
416
00:18:57,875 --> 00:18:58,750
'Cause we're gonna
make Nevel admit
417
00:18:58,792 --> 00:19:00,208
that he loves our webcast,
418
00:19:00,250 --> 00:19:01,959
and he only wrote
that mean stuff
419
00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:03,206
'cause I didn't wanna be
his little girlfriend.
420
00:19:03,208 --> 00:19:04,959
Yeah.
421
00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:06,331
Let's make him regret
writing that review.
422
00:19:06,333 --> 00:19:08,709
Oh, he's not just gonna
regret it.
423
00:19:08,750 --> 00:19:10,166
He's gonna rue it.
424
00:19:15,417 --> 00:19:16,959
Don't worry, Toasty.
425
00:19:17,000 --> 00:19:19,583
Soon, you'll be back
and butter than ever.
426
00:19:22,667 --> 00:19:23,792
Thank God no one heard that.
427
00:19:28,667 --> 00:19:29,709
I'm coming!
428
00:19:35,166 --> 00:19:36,458
I am Nevel.
429
00:19:36,500 --> 00:19:39,500
I'm coming in now.
430
00:19:39,542 --> 00:19:42,208
Okay.
431
00:19:42,250 --> 00:19:45,041
Carly invited me here.
I know.
432
00:19:45,083 --> 00:19:46,834
She said she wants
to apologize to me
433
00:19:46,875 --> 00:19:48,875
for her obnoxious behavior.
434
00:19:48,917 --> 00:19:50,331
Well, I think
she feels bad about it.
435
00:19:50,333 --> 00:19:51,875
Good.
436
00:19:53,542 --> 00:19:54,959
Where is Carly?
437
00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:56,917
Up on the third floor.
438
00:19:56,959 --> 00:19:59,291
You can take the elevator
or the stairs there.
439
00:19:59,333 --> 00:20:00,625
What is that?
440
00:20:00,667 --> 00:20:02,625
Oh, I'm an artist.
441
00:20:02,667 --> 00:20:04,250
I'm making a sculpture
442
00:20:04,291 --> 00:20:07,000
out of butter.
443
00:20:07,041 --> 00:20:09,583
Your work disgusts me.
444
00:20:12,500 --> 00:20:13,709
Nevel's a stupid name.
445
00:20:18,667 --> 00:20:19,709
Carly?
446
00:20:25,250 --> 00:20:27,583
Hello?
447
00:20:27,625 --> 00:20:29,625
Carly?
448
00:20:32,375 --> 00:20:33,750
What the...
449
00:20:33,792 --> 00:20:35,750
Who are you?
What's going on?
450
00:20:35,792 --> 00:20:37,166
Hello, Nevel.
451
00:20:37,208 --> 00:20:38,875
I see you've met our friend,
Jeremy.
452
00:20:38,917 --> 00:20:42,709
Or as we like to call him,
"Germy."
453
00:20:42,750 --> 00:20:44,959
The germiest kid
in our whole school.
454
00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:48,542
It's true.
455
00:20:48,583 --> 00:20:51,792
I'm a mess.
456
00:20:51,834 --> 00:20:53,959
Stop it! I can't stand germs!
457
00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:55,458
Then you better tell the truth.
458
00:20:55,500 --> 00:20:56,709
Admit that you like iCarly...
459
00:20:56,750 --> 00:20:58,291
And that your review was a lie.
460
00:20:58,333 --> 00:21:00,625
Let go of me!
461
00:21:00,667 --> 00:21:02,375
Freddie, roll camera.
462
00:21:04,166 --> 00:21:04,917
Rolling.
463
00:21:04,959 --> 00:21:07,083
Tell the truth, Nevel.
464
00:21:07,125 --> 00:21:09,208
I don't know
what you're talking about!
465
00:21:11,500 --> 00:21:12,291
Stop it, sick-o!
466
00:21:12,333 --> 00:21:14,000
Let go of me!
467
00:21:14,041 --> 00:21:16,083
No way.
They're paying me to do this.
468
00:21:16,125 --> 00:21:17,792
How much?
Five bucks.
469
00:21:17,834 --> 00:21:19,114
I'll give you ten to release me.
470
00:21:19,125 --> 00:21:22,041
Deal.
Ha! Now you get nothing!
471
00:21:25,917 --> 00:21:29,458
You feel the rue?
472
00:21:29,500 --> 00:21:31,166
You feel it?
473
00:21:37,917 --> 00:21:41,041
He outsmarted me.
474
00:21:41,083 --> 00:21:43,291
He outsmarted all of us.
475
00:21:46,500 --> 00:21:49,625
Why does he have to have
such a big brain?
476
00:21:49,667 --> 00:21:51,959
So what are we gonna do now?
I don't know.
477
00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:53,542
How do you take down
a brilliant,
478
00:21:53,583 --> 00:21:55,208
powerful eleven-year-old boy?
479
00:22:04,750 --> 00:22:07,709
Mother, I'm home from school.
480
00:22:07,750 --> 00:22:09,417
Nevel Papperman.
481
00:22:09,458 --> 00:22:11,418
Did you write a bad review
of this girl's web show
482
00:22:11,458 --> 00:22:14,625
just because
you were angry with her?
483
00:22:14,667 --> 00:22:18,291
You told my mom on me?
484
00:22:18,333 --> 00:22:19,458
Nevel!
485
00:22:19,500 --> 00:22:21,375
Okay, yes!
486
00:22:21,417 --> 00:22:23,123
But only 'cause she rubbed
my face with tapenade!
487
00:22:23,125 --> 00:22:24,748
'Cause you kissed me
in a surprise attack.
488
00:22:24,750 --> 00:22:27,667
Shh, shh, shh!
489
00:22:27,709 --> 00:22:29,792
You told me
you thought girls were yucky.
490
00:22:29,834 --> 00:22:32,583
That was last year!
491
00:22:32,625 --> 00:22:34,959
I'm going through changes.
492
00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:36,709
You just go to your room
493
00:22:36,750 --> 00:22:39,125
and write an honest review
of Carly's web show.
494
00:22:39,166 --> 00:22:40,333
Which you said you loved.
495
00:22:40,375 --> 00:22:42,750
A lot.
Yeah, Papperman!
496
00:22:44,166 --> 00:22:45,208
Go on.
497
00:22:49,375 --> 00:22:50,417
Can I call you?
498
00:22:50,458 --> 00:22:52,750
Get outta here!
499
00:22:58,291 --> 00:23:00,291
Germs!
500
00:23:03,417 --> 00:23:04,750
Tapenade?
501
00:23:04,792 --> 00:23:06,250
Oh, and those little crackers.
502
00:23:11,583 --> 00:23:16,959
♪ What so proudly we hailed ♪
503
00:23:17,000 --> 00:23:21,375
♪ At the twilight's
last gleaming ♪
504
00:23:21,417 --> 00:23:25,959
♪ Whose broad stripes
and bright stars ♪
505
00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:29,625
♪ Through the perilous night ♪
506
00:23:31,458 --> 00:23:33,625
♪ Mmm-ahh ♪
507
00:23:35,208 --> 00:23:36,417
Mmm!
33223
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