All language subtitles for Go.On.S01E15.Pass.Interference.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DD+2.0.H.264-playWEB_track3_[eng]

Oh.

Just in time
For valentine's day.

Romance has entered
The group.

Last night, we walked in
On an intimate moment

Between ryan and simone,
But it is a private matter,

And we do not want to make them
Feel uncomfortable.

Oh,
I'm not uncomfortable.

Of all the people in the world,
You are the ones

I'd most like
To see me make love.

She's awesome.

We've needed one of her
For a long time.

Simone's delightful
Openness aside, I just--

- oh, thank you.
- okay.

Oh, cheek kisses...

Worldly.

As you all know, I have a rule
Against people dating

Within the group.

It gets in the way
Of healing

And obviously distracts
Everyone.

Guys, I think what lauren
Is saying is she hates love.

I don't hate love.

At the end of titanic,

She was glad
Leonardo dicaprio died.

Did you cheer for the poison
In romeo and juliet?

What other great things
Do you hate--

Sunshine, america, pizza?

I do not hate pizza, okay?

I got this scar
Reaching into an oven

To save a burning pizza.

How many of you
Can say the same?

I broke my hand
In an enchilada accident.

Sweetie, don't say that.

I know it's true,
But it sounds offensive.

I think it sounds beautiful
And authentic.

Guys, slow down.
We don't need dating rules.

We haven't even talked.
It was just one fun night.

Maybe that's all it was.
- I hope not.

- yes! She likes me.
- I more than like you.

As the french say,
Je t'adore.

Mm.

She's using
The familiar tu form

Rather than the formal vous.

Tu rather than vous.

All:
Tu rather than vous!

Tu rather than vous!

Please don't chant this.

Okay, okay. Enough.

You heard lauren.
Let's respect the rules.

Thank you, yolanda.

Back to why we're here--
Loss and life change.

Who would like to share?

Well, my father's heart
Is failing.

Oh, I can't go back.
It's so boring.

Lauren, I brought you

My "How to make
A perfect wedding" binder.

Aw.

Thanks to this baby,

My wedding went off
Without a hitch.

- oh, severed groom head.
- yeah, except for step 50...

Where instead
Of getting an "I do,"

I got an "I am already
In another state."

Wyoming--
He left me for wyoming.

So step one, we've got
An appointment for you

At salon martinique
To find you a wedding dress.

Oh, that's so sweet,
But it's a little early.

Wyatt and I still
Haven't picked out a date.

At some point, we may want
To make this group discussable.

Dress shopping
Would have been so fun.

We'd all start
Trying stuff on.

I even wore
My good underwear today.

You're an adult.

You should only
Have good underwear.

I'm worried about lauren.

She should be more excited
About getting married.

Fausta has a plan.

We find perfect dress
For lauren.

Yeah! She'll put in on,
See herself all pretty,

And get excited
For her wedding.

But the dress
Has to fit.

Do we know anyone
Who's that tiny?

Hey, check out the kid.

Is it just me?

I've always thought
His body had a certain thin

And graceful lauren-ness.

It is true, from behind.

I once talked to him
For five minutes

About my dead aunt.

He's surprisingly helpful.

Let me hug him.
I can feel if it's right.

Tense up like you don't want
To be this close to me.

- more than I am?
- that's it. That's perfect.

Add supple breasts,
And we are there.

- yeah.
- okay. What?

Owen, we're gonna take you out
And buy you some beer.

- okay.
- okay, okay!

Okay.

Ryan, listen, I'm sorry
If I came on too strong earlier,

But you understand why I have
That rule about not dating.

- totally.
- but you're not gonna listen.

- no.
- you're having fun now.

But a relationship is gonna
Bring up so many issues,

And this is where
You deal with them,

And you're not gonna be able
To do that if she's here.

I may be further along
Than you think I am.

The only help
I may need from you

Is help doing this.

Nope, I can do it.

Look, if we have some kind
Of a problem,

I won't bring it up in group--
I'll just give you a call.

No, I'm not
Your personal therapist.

If you want to discuss
Matters of the heart,

There are groups
Here for that.

Go talk to that
Smug margaret hotchkiss,

With her precious real degree
From a university

And her "I'm smart but sexy"
Tina fey glasses.

You're as good
As margaret hotchkiss.

- she's just so pretty.
- I know.

Owen, come on out.

We know you're doing this
For lauren.

Don't be embarrassed.
This is a safe space.

Fine.

No one told you
To put on the veil.

- I hate it. It bunches up.
- it makes him look schlumpy.

His shoulder disappear--
Not sexy.

- hey! That's hurtful.
- here, try this one on.

- ooh.
- ooh.

To do what you're doing,
You have to be really confident.

And being confident
Is really hot.

Good times.

Ah! Sexy owen--
That's a new color.

Don't care for it.

Well, we've got
Some time to kill.

Let's get to know
Each other better.

Fausta, what's your deal?

I believe
In a benevolent god,

But he gives
Man free will--

Not involved
In the details,

Like great watchmaker.

All right.
I'm interested.

Anne, ever do acid?

Why am I crying?

Because you're beautiful.

I am.

Traveling
Through northern india,

I had dinner with a shaman
And his wife.

They were so poor,

All they had to eat
Was a plate of crickets.

So I surrendered
To the moment and ate one.

Thus began the greatest meal
Of my life.

And I want to share
That gift with you.

This is the worst version

Of where that story
Could have gone.

Impress the girl.

Appear open to new things.

Freak out a little bit.

Eat it.

Oh, my god, you ate that?
That's disgusting!

You gave me a cricket!

You wish it was a cricket!
I found it in the sink!

How could you think
I was serious?

Well, I didn't want
To appear ignorant!

Foreign people
Are so gross.

That story is
From the temple of doom!

What's wrong with you?
- that's funny to you.

Well, I'm going to kiss you
With my bug mouth.

No!

This is really nice.

And the fact that people
Are telling us we can't do it...

- makes it even better.
- oh, yes.

Lauren's just
Trying to help you.

You've been through a lot.
- well, we all have.

But now I'm fixed.

Whoa! Ah! Ha ha!

- everything okay?
- yes. Yeah.

I was just
Thinking how bad

Kingdom of the crystal skull
Is.

I mean, shia labeouf?
Both those names seem fake.

- come here.
- I--

Aah! Let's see,
I want to watch it, though.

I want to watch it right now.
I got to try to find it.

That'll be fun, huh?

Nyah! Ah...

Us dating, bad idea?
Take that, lauren.

You're not here, are you?

Lauren?

And...

Owen.

Wow.

I honor and celebrate
This expression

Of who you apparently are.

Okay, first of all,
She and I just played

A little tonsil hockey--

No. We found you
The perfect wedding dress.

We had owen try it on,
Because as it turns out--

- he's my body double.
- yeah.

I knew
You'd notice eventually.

Last week we wore
The same jeans.

I was so embarrassed,

I threw sweat pants on
Over them.

- that's not a style thing?
- aw, sweetie.

Mm-mm.

What do you think
Of the dress?

It's pretty.

Okay, you guys want
To know the truth?

I have been putting off
Planning my wedding.

It's just all the details
Are stressing me out.

You end up fighting over
Tablecloths and whether or not

The dj should be able
To play hot hot hot-- no.

Listen to me, busty owen.

We want a wedding,
And we want it now.

Why are you being
So hostile?

Because you're turning up
Your pretty nose

At this awesome day
Where you're the star

And everybody kisses your butt.
- we're not getting a day

Because none of us
Is getting married--

Closed off curmudgeon,
Damaged goods,

Insatiable baller.

I'm sorry, sweetie.

I love you, but I don't agree
With your lifestyle.

Why do any of you

Need weddings
To celebrate yourselves?

At some point
In this discussion,

I just became a guy
Standing in a dress.

Lauren's right.
We can throw our own party.

Yeah, we'll call it
A goddess party

'cause we don't need a man
Or a woman

To tell us we're awesome.

And we'll have it
On valentine's day,

But no valentine's stuff
Allowed.

We shouldn't have to feel bad

Because
We don't have boyfriends...

Or girlfriends.

Okay, let's just
Keep it masculine.

This is exhausting.

And if you're gonna wear a veil,
Wear it because it looks cool,

Not because some tradition
Tells you

You have to save your face
For your husband.

I am so proud
Of you goddesses!

Owen, why you
Take dress off?

Oh.

Welcome back
To beautiful losers weight loss.

Part of making
Healthy food choices

Is avoiding temptation,

So pat yourselves on the back
For ridding your cabinets

Of all these
Toxic trigger foods!

Yay!

I am assuming the salty area
Over here is amanda's.

You know.

Lauren knows.

Hey, everybody.
I'm ryan.

So sorry.
So sorry I'm late.

Hey, you got some thin ones.
You're good at this group.

- ryan, what are you doing here?
- oh, my turn to share?

Already? Great.

I have a situation
I need to get off my chest.

The situation
Is janie's ghost.

No, ryan,
This is not a grief group.

Yeah, but it's a group,
So I figured--

- if it's about food.
- well, janie is a cupcake--

The greatest cupcake of my life,
And sadly this cupcake died.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.
What kind of cupcake?

- oh, it doesn't matter.
- chocolate.

So eventually I started
Seeing a new cupcake.

But every time I try to enjoy
This new cupcake--

- red velvet?
- yeah. Sure.

The old cupcake appears.

And I can't tell the new cupcake
About the old cupcake

Because the new cupcake
Will think I'm crazy.

No, we're not doing this.
You have to listen to my rules.

Come on.
- yeah, fine.

I don't need you.
I can get advice from anybody.

Okay, new group,
Assume from my story

That the cupcake
Is a human being.

What do I do?
- where did the ghost appear?

- don't engage.
- very interesting question.

She does not appear
When simone and I

Are away from my house.

Very good insight.
Here you go.

- no.
- it's territorial.

You need to go somewhere
Janie never went. Cheese curls.

- you got it.
- amanda.

Boy, it is raining
Good advice in here.

Excuse me,
But you need to go.

You're getting in the way of
The good work lauren is doing.

Yeah, we got
Four yolandas in here.

Good day.

Great goddess-party venue,
Yolanda.

Thanks.

It was the first place
I called,

So I spent the rest of the night
Creating a composite

Of us four goddesses,

One super bride
I call "Sofanda."

Oh! It's a monster.

Yes. Watchmaker
Does not want this.

I picked the venue.

So to avoid
The kind of conflict

That lauren was worried about,
Let's take turns.

Anne, what kind of flowers?
- oh, screw flowers.

Flowers are no fun.

Balloons! I want them
Floating everywhere.

People can suck on them,
Talk funny.

Balloons are pure joy.

Uh, and, sonia,
You get music.

Oh, my god.

I have the perfect jazz trio
To be backup band.

Backup band?
Who's in front?

- no.
- mm-mm.

Why not?

The binder advises
Against amateur musicians.

Maybe the binder
Would be more open

If it attended a single one
Of my weekly gigs

Instead of staying home
Shaving its legs

Only up to the knees.

I knew
You'd use that against me.

- I want latin funk band.
- what? No funk.

And none of your mouth jazz.

Grouchity-bouchity-bitchity
Bop! Yeah!

That's the power of scat.

I had carrie tell the hotel
I was rachel maddow.

Let's see
What it gets us.

The other night
On the couch,

I felt like there was something
Strange between us.

Wow, you are crazy.

Will you just
Give me one second,

Just to set the mood?

- okay.
- okay, great.

Okay, where are you?

Here, ghosty, ghosty.
Here, ghost wife.

I'm kissing someone!

Very romantic.

Aah!

It's a romantic situation.
I hope no one interrupts us.

I'm kissing.

Sorry.
I was just warming up.

You know, I'm really glad we
Decided to do this on the 13th,

'cause if we were hanging out
On valentine's day

This soon in the relationship,
It would be weird.

Weirder than...

I'm just really nervous,

And I'm so excited
To be alone with you.

I'm going to go get
In the shower.

Want to join me?
- huh?

Let me help you.

Yes.
That--yes.

Hey, nice pump.

Janie,
What are you doing here?

What are you doing here?

Well, I'm--you know,
I'm here with a woman.

It's time.

Great view out there, babe.

Oh, hey.

Ryan, this is thomas.

You're dating?
You have a ghost boyfriend?

Well,
Just because I'm not real

Doesn't mean
I don't have needs.

You want a drink, babe?
It's cool, right?

You're not, like, cheap are you?
- oh, actually, he kind of is.

Pay-per-view.
Alive guy's paying.

Okay. He's got to go.
I don't like him.

You know who he reminds me of?
That guy mike from your office.

Okay, we're not
Doing this again.

Oh!
The avengers.

I was so excited
About this,

But it came out the week
After my accident.

You know, there
Is just no good time

To walk
Into a helicopter propeller.

But that was a bad time.

We are so watching this.
This is gonna be a fun night.

Uh, hey, simone,
So I'm taking off.

- what?
- yeah. Enjoy your shower.

Here's the key
To the room.

Oh! And if you get
The feeling that there are

Two spirits
Doing it out there,

Do your best to try
To shut it down.

Thanks. See ya.

What's with the tension?

This is more distracting
Than when you were being sexy.

We're not supposed to talk
About it in here.

He won't touch me.
He keeps kissing his hand.

And he left me alone,
Naked in the shower.

What?

I've got a dead wife
And a broken windshield wiper

That smears crap
All over the place.

You've got that
Naked in the shower,

And you walk away.

Can no one in here win?
I'll take anything.

Lauren was very clear.

We're not talking
About the relationship.

Oh, it's okay.

We can talk about it.
We're not in a relationship.

It's over.

What?

Lauren, you got to do
Something.

It's valentine's day.

No.
It's goddess sofanda day.

I don't like that.
Make that go away.

Lauren, help them.

Prove that you don't hate love.
Do it for jack and rose.

Do it for pizza.

Okay. Just this once.

I feel--owen, please don't cross
Your legs like me.

It's all I can think about.
- yeah. Buddy, come on.

Seriously.

Okay, ryan,
Let's start with you.

You were going to take simone
Someplace new

Based on the sage advice
Of amanda.

Okay, simone,
The truth is...

Whenever we get romantic...

I-I see janie.

And last night at the hotel,
She brought a gentleman friend.

A date?

You're in a love triangle
With two ghosts?

Damn, ryan, you're
The most messed up one here.

Yeah. And I sleep
With a chew toy.

I'm just odd.
Mentally, I'm quite lucid.

So this has nothing
To do with me.

No. You're awesome.
I'm crazy.

No, king, you're not.
You're just feeling guilty.

You're seeing janie
Because part of you

Worries
That you're hurting her,

And you invented this boyfriend
To punish yourself,

To make yourself feel
How you imagine janie feels.

Lucid...

Odd.
- ah.

- actually, that really helps.
- yeah. That helps me too.

Yeah.
Thank you, lauren.

This place really does make
A difference.

Hey, you hear that, hotchkiss?
I make a difference.

Suck on that!
- good for you, lauren.

Yeah,
It's eating at her.

Care to join me
At the goddess party,

Or do you have a thing
For sane people?

It's okay.
You're conflicted.

I am too.

I mean, I get hurt last night,
And what's the first thing I do?

Call my ex-fiance.

"Oh, god, marco.
Oh, I miss you so much.

What do I have to do
To get you back?"

What?

I just got off the phone
With my balloon guy.

Sonia, why is
Your jazz trio setting up

Next to an abomination called
"Los amigos del funk"?

You say no.
I don't listen.

Here is me in two hours.

"What's that, anne?

I can't hear you yell
Over perfect party music!"

You were on the phone
For eight hours

To romania with this guy?

I was in a rough place!
I'll pay you back.

You used the hotel phone?

Maybe I am cheap.

It is a string quartet
Or nothing.

Whoa.
Why do you get your way?

Because my wife died,

And we never got to have
Our party.

We put it off,
And it never happened.

Well, my fiance
Left me at the altar.

I haven't been able to see
My husband in three years!

All: no!

Hey, hey, hey.
What's going on here?

I can't be with her.
She's unstable.

And I'm too unstable to be with
Someone who's that unstable!

Leaving a girl
In a shower

Does not make an unstable girl
More stable.

I'll tell you that.
- huh.

Maybe we should have a rule

About not dating people
In group.

- party is off.
- what?

Lauren, sweetie,
My people are almost fixed

If you need some help.

Hotchkiss.

♪ my funny valentine ♪

♪ skee-bop-boo
Valentine ♪

This may be rock bottom.

♪ you make me
Spee-li-bop-boo ♪

I checked with my manager.

I can only give
You store credit.

My ass.
I'm going to talk to her.

♪ your looks
Are laughable ♪

♪ un-skee-di-li-bop-boo
Affable ♪

♪ stay, funny valentine ♪

♪ skee-bop-boo-bee-bop-bow ♪

♪ each day
Is valentine's ♪

♪ day ♪

♪ skee-di-li-bop-boo-bee-
Bop-bop-bop, yeah ♪

What? Why did I have
To come down here?

I had a binder with 50 steps
To plan the perfect day.

Here's the 51st.

"If it's right,
Don't take 'no' for an answer."

It wasn't right with him.
It's right with you.

Oh, sweetie.

- sofanda is back.
- grab a dress.

Latin funk?

Sorry, but you cannot cancel
Los amigos del funk.

They have no phone.

Whoo!
Yeah.

Ryan, have I introduced you
To sasha?

Five times now.
It's very nice meeting you...

Again.

Here's your fifth one
Of these too.

- I'll be back in a minute.
- I'll be here.

Hey, buddy boy.

Hey.

Can I buy you a drink?

I'm quite certain
You didn't drive here.

I'm sorry
About the other night.

Ah, don't be.
It's for the best.

She's nuts...

Says the man who,
From anyone else's perspective,

Is talking
To a coat rack.

Talking to a coat rack?

- yep.
- okay.

I don't think I can be

With somebody like her
Right now.

Maybe she's just
Who you should be with.

I mean, you told her
The crazy truth about you.

She didn't freak out.

And you need to stop
Feeling guilty.

I want you to be happy.

Come on, go to her, now.

Why are you
Trying to wrap this up?

And why are you all dressed up?
Do you have a date?

Well,
It is valentine's day.

Go.

Hi.

I think we should be crazy
Together.

Did you ask your dead wife
About that?

Yes, but just briefly.
She has a date, so...

Will you be crazy
With me?

I'd love to be crazy
With you.

I would like to make
A toast to the goddesses.

You are beautiful,
And you are strong.

And no one
Needs men or rings

Or sanity
To make them whole.

So, lauren, we managed
To pull off a party

For four brides.

You ready
To take the binder?

Yes.

Yes. You guys
Have inspired me. I'm ready.

You start tonight
By picking a venue.

Here's a surprise to help--

Back one day early
From his trip, wyatt!

Happy valentine's day, baby.

- oh, my--
- oh, no, sweetie.

- ooh!
- oh, um, that--

Uncanny. Sorry.

Whoo!
Yeah.