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1
00:00:00,959 --> 00:00:02,251
New york marathon's
Coming up.
2
00:00:02,252 --> 00:00:04,337
You know who won't be there?
Moi.
3
00:00:04,338 --> 00:00:05,755
That is french for "Me."
4
00:00:05,756 --> 00:00:07,673
Because I can't run?
Yes.
5
00:00:07,674 --> 00:00:10,384
Because I don't support a day
Where people can just pee
6
00:00:10,385 --> 00:00:13,179
Wherever they want?
Oh, yes.
7
00:00:13,180 --> 00:00:15,431
But most of all,
I think long distance running
8
00:00:15,432 --> 00:00:16,515
Is lonely.
9
00:00:16,516 --> 00:00:18,559
I can't stand being alone.
10
00:00:18,560 --> 00:00:21,270
In fact, I'm gonna go
To chris in san diego right now.
11
00:00:21,271 --> 00:00:23,231
Chris, be with me.
12
00:00:23,232 --> 00:00:24,815
I need your take
On the chargers' defense
13
00:00:24,816 --> 00:00:27,693
Now more than ever.
14
00:00:27,694 --> 00:00:30,613
Woo! Taking the look
From day to night.
15
00:00:30,614 --> 00:00:32,448
No more
"I work in a man's world.
16
00:00:32,449 --> 00:00:34,158
"I wanna be taken seriously.
17
00:00:34,159 --> 00:00:35,534
I'm gonna dress
Like a russian grandmother."
18
00:00:35,535 --> 00:00:37,536
You know what?
This is my first night out
19
00:00:37,537 --> 00:00:39,705
In two weeks, so you're not
Gonna spoil this for me.
20
00:00:39,706 --> 00:00:41,540
I can't believe ryan isn't
Making you stay late.
21
00:00:41,541 --> 00:00:43,042
You guys have had
A lot of work lately.
22
00:00:43,043 --> 00:00:45,336
No, he just doesn't want
To go home to his empty house,
23
00:00:45,337 --> 00:00:47,838
And so he keeps coming up
With lamer and lamer excuses
24
00:00:47,839 --> 00:00:49,382
To work late.
25
00:00:49,383 --> 00:00:51,550
Oh, we need to pull clips
For the "Best of" show.
26
00:00:51,551 --> 00:00:53,552
We should start early,
Because I've been
27
00:00:53,553 --> 00:00:55,596
Inordinately "Best" this year.
28
00:00:55,597 --> 00:00:57,306
We need to come up
With different ways
29
00:00:57,307 --> 00:00:59,225
For me to do our station I.D.
30
00:00:59,226 --> 00:01:01,394
K-bal.
K-bal.
31
00:01:01,395 --> 00:01:05,731
K-baaal!
32
00:01:05,732 --> 00:01:08,484
Carrie, could you
Come in here for a moment?
33
00:01:08,485 --> 00:01:10,569
I'm just kidding.
You don't have to come in.
34
00:01:10,570 --> 00:01:11,904
That was pretty funny,
Though, right?
35
00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:13,447
You know what?
You better come in.
36
00:01:13,448 --> 00:01:14,699
And then he gets bored
Of the work,
37
00:01:14,700 --> 00:01:16,534
And he says--
- you know what might be fun?
38
00:01:16,535 --> 00:01:21,747
You know what might be fun?
39
00:01:21,748 --> 00:01:23,833
And then we have
What he thinks is fun.
40
00:01:23,834 --> 00:01:25,584
That's the domino's.
41
00:01:25,585 --> 00:01:26,752
Yes!
42
00:01:26,753 --> 00:01:30,340
Faster, faster, faster...
43
00:01:36,305 --> 00:01:37,430
You know what might be fun?
44
00:01:40,767 --> 00:01:43,311
Movin' into this nursing home
Has been rough.
45
00:01:43,312 --> 00:01:45,146
Well, let's talk it through.
46
00:01:45,147 --> 00:01:46,522
Just what is it
About the nursing home
47
00:01:46,523 --> 00:01:47,732
That's bothering you?
48
00:01:47,733 --> 00:01:50,693
I hate old people
And I hate sick people.
49
00:01:50,694 --> 00:01:53,446
You know what could
Make things more fun?
50
00:01:53,447 --> 00:01:56,657
You're blind and black,
So why don't you find a friend
51
00:01:56,658 --> 00:01:59,618
Who's white and deaf,
And then you can be
52
00:01:59,619 --> 00:02:01,287
Like gene wilder
And richard pryor--
53
00:02:01,288 --> 00:02:04,290
Stop, stop doing
What you're doing.
54
00:02:04,291 --> 00:02:05,458
- so can I talk?
- mm-hmm.
55
00:02:05,459 --> 00:02:07,710
My boyfriend jason's
Driving me crazy.
56
00:02:07,711 --> 00:02:08,836
Sometimes, he stares at me,
57
00:02:08,837 --> 00:02:10,629
And I'm like,
"What's with that look?"
58
00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:12,506
And he's like,
"It's just my face."
59
00:02:12,507 --> 00:02:14,383
Let's dig a little deeper.
60
00:02:14,384 --> 00:02:15,801
What do you think
Is the undercurrent of--
61
00:02:15,802 --> 00:02:17,970
No, don't dig deeper.
She hates his face.
62
00:02:17,971 --> 00:02:20,723
So, unless he gets a new face,
That's kind of a deal breaker.
63
00:02:20,724 --> 00:02:22,516
Well, it would appear
That way on the surface, but--
64
00:02:23,810 --> 00:02:25,061
You know what this group's
Problem is?
65
00:02:25,062 --> 00:02:27,188
We spend all of our time
In the huddle talking,
66
00:02:27,189 --> 00:02:29,315
And we never run a play,
We never take action.
67
00:02:29,316 --> 00:02:30,691
It's always stasis.
68
00:02:30,692 --> 00:02:33,486
Sonia, what do you wanna do
About your boyfriend?
69
00:02:33,487 --> 00:02:35,654
You know what?
I wanna dump him.
70
00:02:35,655 --> 00:02:37,573
Do it then!
Dump his ass.
71
00:02:37,574 --> 00:02:38,949
Yeah, either break up
With him,
72
00:02:38,950 --> 00:02:41,660
Or stop talking
About it.
73
00:02:41,661 --> 00:02:43,496
Did any of you know
I hate my mother?
74
00:02:43,497 --> 00:02:44,580
I haven't been able
To bring it up
75
00:02:44,581 --> 00:02:46,415
Because of all
The jason chatter.
76
00:02:46,416 --> 00:02:47,666
Dump him.
77
00:02:47,667 --> 00:02:50,503
All: dump him! Dump him!
Dump him! Dump--
78
00:02:50,504 --> 00:02:52,421
Okay, it's getting a little
"Villagers coming
79
00:02:52,422 --> 00:02:53,547
For frankenstein" in here.
80
00:02:53,548 --> 00:02:55,383
I'm gonna dump him.
81
00:02:55,384 --> 00:02:56,384
I'm gonna call him tonight.
82
00:02:56,385 --> 00:02:57,968
Tonight?
Why wait?
83
00:02:57,969 --> 00:02:59,678
Do it now.
- yeah.
84
00:02:59,679 --> 00:03:02,890
What does it mean when I light
The serenity candle?
85
00:03:02,891 --> 00:03:05,601
That everything fun stops?
86
00:03:05,602 --> 00:03:07,853
Hello, jason?
87
00:03:07,854 --> 00:03:10,439
I am tired of you,
And your food blog,
88
00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:12,525
And your obsession
With the plausibility
89
00:03:12,526 --> 00:03:15,778
Of living on other planets
Or at the bottom of the sea.
90
00:03:15,779 --> 00:03:17,488
And you hate his face.
91
00:03:17,489 --> 00:03:18,989
Ooh, ooh!
Insult his genitalia.
92
00:03:18,990 --> 00:03:20,408
We hate that.
93
00:03:20,409 --> 00:03:22,910
You tell that low-down
Dirty fool that the sonia train
94
00:03:22,911 --> 00:03:26,247
Is now, uh, an express,
95
00:03:26,248 --> 00:03:28,374
And, uh...
96
00:03:28,375 --> 00:03:29,917
Don't give up, george.
97
00:03:29,918 --> 00:03:33,045
It won't be stopping
At the jason station.
98
00:03:33,046 --> 00:03:34,338
He did it.
He was able to do it.
99
00:03:34,339 --> 00:03:36,340
Oh, there it is.
100
00:03:36,341 --> 00:03:38,634
You are
Broken up with, mister.
101
00:03:38,635 --> 00:03:41,637
- ow!
- yeah!
102
00:03:41,638 --> 00:03:44,557
Wow, I feel like we really
Got carried away.
103
00:03:44,558 --> 00:03:47,643
Why don't we ask ourselves--
- shh. No more questions.
104
00:03:47,644 --> 00:03:50,646
We want action, and ryan king
Is a man of action.
105
00:03:50,647 --> 00:03:52,356
We want action.
106
00:03:52,357 --> 00:03:54,066
All: we want action!
107
00:03:54,067 --> 00:03:55,818
No more stasis.
108
00:03:55,819 --> 00:03:57,570
All: no more stasis!
109
00:03:57,571 --> 00:03:59,905
Action.
Ah--stasis!
110
00:03:59,906 --> 00:04:02,325
All: action!
Ah--stasis!
111
00:04:04,411 --> 00:04:06,996
Ryan?
112
00:04:06,997 --> 00:04:09,498
I, um, I know you like
To stir up controversy,
113
00:04:09,499 --> 00:04:11,459
But this isn't
Sports radio, okay?
114
00:04:11,460 --> 00:04:13,335
You can't solve
People's problems in 30 seconds.
115
00:04:13,336 --> 00:04:15,504
I kind of just solved sonia's.
116
00:04:15,505 --> 00:04:17,423
Did you,
Or did you just help her avoid
117
00:04:17,424 --> 00:04:19,091
Doing some serious
Emotional work
118
00:04:19,092 --> 00:04:21,385
Within the context
Of a relationship?
119
00:04:21,386 --> 00:04:22,803
The first one.
120
00:04:22,804 --> 00:04:25,055
Ryan, you're good at your job,
But so am I,
121
00:04:25,056 --> 00:04:27,725
And I'm here to tell you
Your words have consequences.
122
00:04:27,726 --> 00:04:29,310
Ryan?
123
00:04:29,311 --> 00:04:32,605
Hey, that was the most exciting
Session we've ever had.
124
00:04:32,606 --> 00:04:33,606
Hey, you love sports.
125
00:04:33,607 --> 00:04:35,900
I-I got something
You should see.
126
00:04:35,901 --> 00:04:38,652
A real piece
Of basketball history.
127
00:04:38,653 --> 00:04:40,446
Oh, I'd like to see that.
128
00:04:40,447 --> 00:04:42,531
Well, come by the house,
And, uh, bring your friend,
129
00:04:42,532 --> 00:04:44,950
Uh, steven with you.
He's a real cool guy.
130
00:04:44,951 --> 00:04:47,328
He is a cool guy.
And you know what he likes?
131
00:04:47,329 --> 00:04:48,996
Action.
132
00:04:48,997 --> 00:04:50,789
Action! Action!
133
00:04:50,790 --> 00:04:53,460
- yeah, I'm done with that.
- oh.
134
00:04:56,421 --> 00:04:58,631
Somebody named sonia
Here to see you.
135
00:04:58,632 --> 00:05:00,799
She said she's from your group,
And she seems crazy,
136
00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:02,092
So I believe her.
137
00:05:02,093 --> 00:05:04,386
Really?
Did you tell her that I was--
138
00:05:04,387 --> 00:05:06,472
Hey, sonia!
You're at my office.
139
00:05:06,473 --> 00:05:07,806
That's fun.
What's goin' on?
140
00:05:07,807 --> 00:05:10,476
Nothin'.
What's up with you?
141
00:05:10,477 --> 00:05:13,646
Well, I'm working.
That's why I'm here...At work.
142
00:05:13,647 --> 00:05:17,149
Yeah. I'm lonely too.
143
00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:20,361
Just keep thinking
About jason.
144
00:05:20,362 --> 00:05:21,987
Now, sonia,
Remember how we decided
145
00:05:21,988 --> 00:05:23,656
Not to dwell on our feelings?
146
00:05:23,657 --> 00:05:24,990
What's better than feeling?
147
00:05:24,991 --> 00:05:27,159
- action?
- that's right. Action.
148
00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:29,578
No, no, no.
This is the fastest way out.
149
00:05:29,579 --> 00:05:31,997
So you lost your boyfriend.
You gotta fill the void.
150
00:05:31,998 --> 00:05:33,624
What else do you enjoy?
151
00:05:33,625 --> 00:05:35,584
Mm, back when I had a cat,
I never felt lonely.
152
00:05:35,585 --> 00:05:36,835
I loved taking care of him.
153
00:05:36,836 --> 00:05:38,921
- so let's get you a cat.
- you think?
154
00:05:38,922 --> 00:05:40,798
Yes! Why are we still talking
About this?
155
00:05:40,799 --> 00:05:43,592
Go, get a cat right now,
Before the cat store closes.
156
00:05:43,593 --> 00:05:46,011
I say "Sonia,"
You say "Cat."
157
00:05:46,012 --> 00:05:47,930
Sonia! Sonia!
- cat! Cat!
158
00:05:47,931 --> 00:05:49,974
I say "Ryan,"
You say "Best friend!"
159
00:05:49,975 --> 00:05:51,517
Ryan!
160
00:05:51,518 --> 00:05:54,520
Are you saying it?
161
00:05:54,521 --> 00:05:56,188
Hey, you may wanna get
Some take-out menus.
162
00:05:56,189 --> 00:05:58,023
I'm afraid we're gonna have
To work late again tonight.
163
00:05:58,024 --> 00:05:59,567
Oh, yeah,
It's no problem, boss.
164
00:05:59,568 --> 00:06:00,776
Let me just make
A quick phone call.
165
00:06:00,777 --> 00:06:02,653
Hi, sophie.
166
00:06:02,654 --> 00:06:04,530
Yeah, I cannot come meet you
At the point tonight.
167
00:06:04,531 --> 00:06:08,576
Yes, I am working
Late tonight again.
168
00:06:08,577 --> 00:06:10,703
It's just me and my boss.
169
00:06:10,704 --> 00:06:12,663
We're just eatin' out
Of styrofoam.
170
00:06:12,664 --> 00:06:14,456
It's a fake phone call,
Isn't it?
171
00:06:14,457 --> 00:06:15,541
You're not talking to anyone.
172
00:06:15,542 --> 00:06:16,750
You're trying
To get a point across
173
00:06:16,751 --> 00:06:18,877
By making a fake phone call.
Okay, I get it.
174
00:06:18,878 --> 00:06:22,881
Go have fun with sophie,
If she even is a real person.
175
00:06:44,112 --> 00:06:45,988
Hey, you know
What might be fun?
176
00:06:48,199 --> 00:06:49,533
Carrie!
177
00:06:49,534 --> 00:06:51,076
Hey!
I made it!
178
00:06:51,077 --> 00:06:52,244
There you are.
179
00:06:52,245 --> 00:06:53,495
I've been lookin'
All over for you.
180
00:06:53,496 --> 00:06:55,080
What are you doing here?
181
00:06:55,081 --> 00:06:57,791
Ah, you forgot your hat,
And I thought I'd be amazing
182
00:06:57,792 --> 00:06:58,834
And bring it down to you.
183
00:06:58,835 --> 00:06:59,960
Here you go.
I'm amazing.
184
00:06:59,961 --> 00:07:01,045
This is not my hat.
185
00:07:01,046 --> 00:07:02,046
Yeah, I know.
186
00:07:02,047 --> 00:07:04,006
Your hat was pretty awful,
187
00:07:04,007 --> 00:07:06,592
And the kings won
The stanley cup, so put that on.
188
00:07:07,927 --> 00:07:09,595
There you go-o-o!
189
00:07:09,596 --> 00:07:11,096
Looks great.
So...
190
00:07:11,097 --> 00:07:13,057
- hi, I'm sophie.
- hi.
191
00:07:13,058 --> 00:07:15,643
- this is reina.
- hi, I'm ryan, carrie's boss.
192
00:07:15,644 --> 00:07:17,645
I recognize you
From your billboard.
193
00:07:17,646 --> 00:07:19,104
Oh, well,
Don't be intimidated,
194
00:07:19,105 --> 00:07:20,564
Uh, by us billboard people.
195
00:07:20,565 --> 00:07:21,982
We're just like you.
196
00:07:21,983 --> 00:07:23,692
In fact, I was just riding over
With the burger king.
197
00:07:23,693 --> 00:07:25,527
He's a funny guy.
198
00:07:29,658 --> 00:07:31,950
- ryan, hi.
- hey, jack.
199
00:07:31,951 --> 00:07:33,786
No waiting for you.
200
00:07:33,787 --> 00:07:36,121
How many in your party?
- well, I don't know.
201
00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:38,582
Is it a party of one,
Or a party of four?
202
00:07:38,583 --> 00:07:40,918
- four.
- definitely four.
203
00:07:40,919 --> 00:07:42,920
- right this way.
- okay, ladies, after you.
204
00:07:42,921 --> 00:07:44,630
Drinks are on me.
All right?
205
00:07:44,631 --> 00:07:46,590
Except for you though 'cause
We're gonna have to work late.
206
00:07:46,591 --> 00:07:48,468
I'm serious.
207
00:07:53,932 --> 00:07:55,265
George!
We're here.
208
00:07:55,266 --> 00:07:56,934
Ryan, hello.
209
00:07:56,935 --> 00:07:58,310
Hey, cuz, how's it hangin'?
210
00:07:58,311 --> 00:07:59,978
Steven, my brother.
211
00:07:59,979 --> 00:08:02,147
What up, blood?
Love your crib.
212
00:08:02,148 --> 00:08:04,066
Come in.
Sit down.
213
00:08:04,067 --> 00:08:05,150
What?
214
00:08:05,151 --> 00:08:06,318
Does george think
You're black?
215
00:08:06,319 --> 00:08:07,861
I think so.
216
00:08:07,862 --> 00:08:09,863
I didn't say anything, but I can
See how he'd get there.
217
00:08:09,864 --> 00:08:11,156
I have an innate
Street credibility.
218
00:08:11,157 --> 00:08:14,034
No one with sight
Has ever thought so.
219
00:08:14,035 --> 00:08:17,037
So, george, you wanted
To, uh, show us something?
220
00:08:17,038 --> 00:08:18,706
Brace yourself.
221
00:08:18,707 --> 00:08:22,000
It's a real piece
Of sports history.
222
00:08:22,001 --> 00:08:24,002
I even made
A special case for it.
223
00:08:24,003 --> 00:08:28,632
Take a look.
224
00:08:28,633 --> 00:08:31,719
Ah, it's not every day
You see something like this.
225
00:08:31,720 --> 00:08:35,013
What do you, uh--what do you
Call a thing like that?
226
00:08:35,014 --> 00:08:37,182
- it's a basketball.
- no, yeah, no, yeah, I know.
227
00:08:37,183 --> 00:08:39,017
Uh, no, no, I mean,
What do you call it?
228
00:08:39,018 --> 00:08:42,020
Because I'll call it
"The rock," "The pumpkin,"
229
00:08:42,021 --> 00:08:43,063
"The round dribbly"--
230
00:08:43,064 --> 00:08:44,898
I was nervous
About displaying it
231
00:08:44,899 --> 00:08:46,191
Because of its value.
232
00:08:46,192 --> 00:08:48,944
Can you read the name on it?
233
00:08:48,945 --> 00:08:50,821
Steven,
Why don't you read it?
234
00:08:50,822 --> 00:08:54,032
You know how george loves
The sound of your voice.
235
00:08:54,033 --> 00:08:55,242
Dig that, ryan.
236
00:08:55,243 --> 00:08:58,203
Um, the thing is
I don't have my specs.
237
00:08:58,204 --> 00:09:00,038
It's wilt chamberlain's
Signature
238
00:09:00,039 --> 00:09:02,624
On a ball
From his 100-point game.
239
00:09:02,625 --> 00:09:05,711
Oh, that is so awful,
240
00:09:05,712 --> 00:09:07,337
Because I'm a big fan
Of defense.
241
00:09:07,338 --> 00:09:10,841
That game was one of the great
Experiences of my life.
242
00:09:10,842 --> 00:09:11,967
Hand me that ball.
243
00:09:11,968 --> 00:09:14,344
I haven't touched it
In a long time.
244
00:09:14,345 --> 00:09:18,141
Sure! Just let me,
Uh, get it out of the case here.
245
00:09:19,851 --> 00:09:21,727
Boy, that is really in there.
246
00:09:21,728 --> 00:09:23,980
Is it hermetically sealed?
247
00:09:35,784 --> 00:09:37,160
Homey, we need to talk.
248
00:09:40,163 --> 00:09:41,705
I got a cat like you said.
249
00:09:41,706 --> 00:09:43,707
God!
Good, sonia, good.
250
00:09:43,708 --> 00:09:45,626
Yeah, fuzzy jason's amazing.
251
00:09:45,627 --> 00:09:47,920
Thanks again.
You really made my life better.
252
00:09:47,921 --> 00:09:50,172
Oh--hey, would you
Do me a favor
253
00:09:50,173 --> 00:09:51,548
And say that
In front of lauren?
254
00:09:51,549 --> 00:09:54,426
I think she's beginning
To question my awesomeness.
255
00:09:54,427 --> 00:09:56,970
The only problem is
Now fuzzy jason's home alone
256
00:09:56,971 --> 00:09:59,348
While I'm at work,
And I worry.
257
00:09:59,349 --> 00:10:02,100
Mo' money,
Mo' problems, right?
258
00:10:02,101 --> 00:10:03,393
Not really.
259
00:10:03,394 --> 00:10:05,103
It just makes me feel like--
260
00:10:05,104 --> 00:10:06,814
Don't feel, sonia.
261
00:10:06,815 --> 00:10:08,273
That's where we get
Bogged down.
262
00:10:08,274 --> 00:10:10,734
You and I, we're doers.
What do you wanna do?
263
00:10:10,735 --> 00:10:12,986
I wanna get fuzzy jason
A friend.
264
00:10:12,987 --> 00:10:14,863
I wanna get a second cat,
Damn it.
265
00:10:14,864 --> 00:10:17,282
You know, I wasn't looking
For a protege, sonia,
266
00:10:17,283 --> 00:10:19,409
But I guess
When the teacher's ready,
267
00:10:19,410 --> 00:10:20,786
The student appears.
268
00:10:20,787 --> 00:10:23,123
- cats!
- right.
269
00:10:27,043 --> 00:10:29,127
So what's up with
The george museum over here?
270
00:10:29,128 --> 00:10:31,797
From now on,
Anything I own
271
00:10:31,798 --> 00:10:34,258
That's worth anything,
I keep with me
272
00:10:34,259 --> 00:10:35,676
So no one will steal it.
273
00:10:35,677 --> 00:10:37,803
Ryan told me what happened to
Your basketball, george.
274
00:10:37,804 --> 00:10:39,221
I'm so sorry.
275
00:10:39,222 --> 00:10:40,222
How you holdin' up, buddy?
276
00:10:40,223 --> 00:10:41,974
How do you think?
277
00:10:41,975 --> 00:10:45,727
I had something I love
Cruelly and suddenly taken away.
278
00:10:45,728 --> 00:10:46,979
You wouldn't understand.
279
00:10:46,980 --> 00:10:49,731
Well, I did lose
The love of my life.
280
00:10:49,732 --> 00:10:52,317
I'm talking
About something you can bounce.
281
00:10:52,318 --> 00:10:53,443
Ah.
282
00:10:53,444 --> 00:10:55,237
Poor george.
283
00:10:55,238 --> 00:10:57,489
I don't know how to help him.
284
00:11:05,123 --> 00:11:07,040
Uh, can we turn this off?
285
00:11:07,041 --> 00:11:08,458
Jazz makes me nervous.
286
00:11:08,459 --> 00:11:10,043
It's too sexual.
287
00:11:10,044 --> 00:11:12,421
This is john coltrane.
288
00:11:12,422 --> 00:11:16,925
It comforts me,
And we gonna listen to it.
289
00:11:21,347 --> 00:11:26,852
Whoever this is,
It better be a woman.
290
00:11:26,853 --> 00:11:29,062
Hey, carrie!
291
00:11:29,063 --> 00:11:31,356
I just got a, uh, text
From sonia.
292
00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:32,733
- from your group?
- yeah.
293
00:11:32,734 --> 00:11:35,068
You know how I like
To take people under my wing,
294
00:11:35,069 --> 00:11:36,069
Better them?
295
00:11:36,070 --> 00:11:37,821
She's kind of my project
This week.
296
00:11:37,822 --> 00:11:40,866
She just adopted a cat,
So cute.
297
00:11:40,867 --> 00:11:45,954
Hmm.
298
00:11:45,955 --> 00:11:48,749
Is this the same cat?
299
00:11:48,750 --> 00:11:51,126
Uh, I'm countin' three cats.
300
00:11:51,127 --> 00:11:52,377
No, four.
301
00:11:52,378 --> 00:11:56,298
No, the first one had spots.
That's five.
302
00:11:56,299 --> 00:11:58,300
That's curious.
303
00:11:58,301 --> 00:11:59,885
Eh, whatever makes her happy.
304
00:11:59,886 --> 00:12:02,220
So, what is on tap
For us tonight?
305
00:12:02,221 --> 00:12:05,057
Oh, ryan.
306
00:12:05,058 --> 00:12:06,767
Gah!
307
00:12:06,768 --> 00:12:08,477
You know, it never occurred
To me that you would
308
00:12:08,478 --> 00:12:10,771
Wanna do something,
And I made these plans,
309
00:12:10,772 --> 00:12:12,773
And it's at this place
That you would hate...
310
00:12:13,983 --> 00:12:16,068
And, uh, it's set in stone,
So...
311
00:12:16,069 --> 00:12:18,528
Sounds like it'd be hard
To cancel.
312
00:12:18,529 --> 00:12:21,782
What is it?
313
00:12:21,783 --> 00:12:24,368
So all they do here
Is blow-dry hair?
314
00:12:24,369 --> 00:12:26,411
I love it.
315
00:12:26,412 --> 00:12:28,413
Whoa, miss popular,
Gettin' a lot of texts there.
316
00:12:28,414 --> 00:12:30,207
Are they from a boy?
317
00:12:30,208 --> 00:12:33,877
Has to be, 'cause all of
Carrie's angels are right here.
318
00:12:33,878 --> 00:12:35,087
Is it somebody
From the office?
319
00:12:35,088 --> 00:12:37,089
Is it eric from sound editing?
320
00:12:37,090 --> 00:12:40,258
Sophie, does carrie ever talk
To you about boys at all?
321
00:12:40,259 --> 00:12:41,551
She talks about an eric.
322
00:12:41,552 --> 00:12:43,553
She does?
I was just fishing!
323
00:12:43,554 --> 00:12:44,638
I knew it!
324
00:12:44,639 --> 00:12:47,892
♪ carrie and eric,
Carrie and e-- ♪
325
00:12:50,853 --> 00:12:53,522
Okay...
This has gotta stop.
326
00:12:53,523 --> 00:12:56,566
Look, I know that you are going
Through a lot,
327
00:12:56,567 --> 00:12:59,903
But I gotta have my own life.
328
00:12:59,904 --> 00:13:04,116
I'm your assistant.
I'm--I can't be more.
329
00:13:04,117 --> 00:13:06,076
I need more.
330
00:13:06,077 --> 00:13:08,286
No, that's where you say,
"I'm sorry
331
00:13:08,287 --> 00:13:10,288
For asking so much of you."
332
00:13:10,289 --> 00:13:13,250
Hey, I lost the person
That cared about me
333
00:13:13,251 --> 00:13:14,918
More than anyone else
In the world,
334
00:13:14,919 --> 00:13:16,920
And now I don't wanna
Go home
335
00:13:16,921 --> 00:13:19,965
Because everything reminds me
Of her.
336
00:13:19,966 --> 00:13:21,383
Please?
337
00:13:21,384 --> 00:13:23,593
A lot of people
Care about you.
338
00:13:23,594 --> 00:13:24,928
Yeah, but not like you.
339
00:13:24,929 --> 00:13:27,389
Come on, you were always
The vice janie,
340
00:13:27,390 --> 00:13:28,473
And now you gotta step it up,
341
00:13:28,474 --> 00:13:30,475
Because the current
Vice-vice janie
342
00:13:30,476 --> 00:13:33,061
Owns up to
Five different cats.
343
00:13:35,189 --> 00:13:37,274
All right, okay, fine.
344
00:13:37,275 --> 00:13:39,317
Can there just, at least,
Be some guidelines?
345
00:13:39,318 --> 00:13:40,402
Sure.
346
00:13:40,403 --> 00:13:42,279
You go first.
- great.
347
00:13:42,280 --> 00:13:44,197
Uh, how about stop throwing
Soccer balls at my head?
348
00:13:44,198 --> 00:13:45,407
Done.
349
00:13:45,408 --> 00:13:46,783
I'm gonna take the next three.
350
00:13:46,784 --> 00:13:49,619
If I'm watching the daily show,
Can I call you
351
00:13:49,620 --> 00:13:52,205
And repeat funny things
That jon stewart has just said?
352
00:13:52,206 --> 00:13:53,331
Yes.
353
00:13:53,332 --> 00:13:55,333
If I get invited
To a wedding,
354
00:13:55,334 --> 00:13:58,503
And the dress is havana casual,
Can you tell me what that means?
355
00:13:58,504 --> 00:14:00,422
Yes, I can tell you
That you're supposed to wear
356
00:14:00,423 --> 00:14:02,174
A linen suit, and also,
Don't go to that wedding,
357
00:14:02,175 --> 00:14:03,258
'cause it sounds stupid.
358
00:14:03,259 --> 00:14:06,011
Perfect.
359
00:14:06,012 --> 00:14:09,347
This next one may be
Pushing it a little bit.
360
00:14:09,348 --> 00:14:13,101
I wanna know that someone is
Thinking about me,
361
00:14:13,102 --> 00:14:15,229
Even if I'm not around.
362
00:14:18,066 --> 00:14:20,650
I can do that.
363
00:14:20,651 --> 00:14:22,527
Of course,
You're gonna have to agree
364
00:14:22,528 --> 00:14:24,279
To sometimes not be around.
365
00:14:24,280 --> 00:14:26,198
I can do that.
366
00:14:26,199 --> 00:14:28,116
I'll start right now.
367
00:14:28,117 --> 00:14:29,659
Good night, one of the bee-gees.
368
00:14:29,660 --> 00:14:32,955
Good night,
St. Elmo's fire rob lowe.
369
00:14:49,430 --> 00:14:50,722
Hey, rye-bread!
370
00:14:50,723 --> 00:14:52,682
We're havin' fun
With my name.
371
00:14:52,683 --> 00:14:54,059
That's good.
372
00:14:54,060 --> 00:14:55,102
Here's a question.
373
00:14:55,103 --> 00:14:56,394
What are you doing here?
374
00:14:56,395 --> 00:14:58,688
Oh, you need to watch the cats
For a few hours.
375
00:14:58,689 --> 00:15:00,941
Lauren's gonna stop by my house
To check on me,
376
00:15:00,942 --> 00:15:03,568
And she gets all judge-y
Because she thinks I use cats
377
00:15:03,569 --> 00:15:05,987
To avoid human relationships,
And you're so awesome,
378
00:15:05,988 --> 00:15:07,239
And you get it.
379
00:15:07,240 --> 00:15:09,241
I thought I did.
380
00:15:09,242 --> 00:15:11,993
Weren't you supposed to just get
One more cat?
381
00:15:11,994 --> 00:15:13,161
You know how it is.
382
00:15:13,162 --> 00:15:14,412
You get two,
And then you think,
383
00:15:14,413 --> 00:15:15,956
"It'd be nice to have a third,"
384
00:15:15,957 --> 00:15:17,707
But then you don't want one
To be the "Middle" cat.
385
00:15:17,708 --> 00:15:19,376
Then you're like,
"I've got four,
386
00:15:19,377 --> 00:15:21,044
I'm so close to five."
387
00:15:21,045 --> 00:15:23,296
Then you decide
You wanna have a six-pack!
388
00:15:23,297 --> 00:15:25,757
Then you say,
"Maybe it's too much,"
389
00:15:25,758 --> 00:15:28,176
And then you say, "Action!"
390
00:15:28,177 --> 00:15:30,428
Thanks!
Bye, ry-clef jean...
391
00:15:30,429 --> 00:15:32,264
...From the fugees!
392
00:15:32,265 --> 00:15:33,765
You're coming back,
Though, right?
393
00:15:33,766 --> 00:15:35,600
Protege?
394
00:15:36,978 --> 00:15:38,186
She's coming back,
Though, right?
395
00:15:44,068 --> 00:15:46,194
Hey.
Did you, by any chance,
396
00:15:46,195 --> 00:15:49,322
Tell sonia it was a good idea
For her to start getting cats?
397
00:15:49,323 --> 00:15:51,283
She seemed ready, so--
398
00:15:51,284 --> 00:15:54,286
Ah! You got it all
Figured out, don't you, king?
399
00:15:54,287 --> 00:15:56,454
I don't feel
Like I had all the information.
400
00:15:56,455 --> 00:15:58,456
Here you go, smart guy.
401
00:15:58,457 --> 00:16:00,041
There are more?
402
00:16:00,042 --> 00:16:02,210
I thought she gave me
All the cats.
403
00:16:02,211 --> 00:16:04,129
Why is she spreading around
The cats?
404
00:16:04,130 --> 00:16:06,590
Because she doesn't want you
To realize she's crazy.
405
00:16:06,591 --> 00:16:09,759
Even six cats is crazy.
This doesn't make any sense.
406
00:16:09,760 --> 00:16:12,638
Yeah, because she's crazy.
407
00:16:19,103 --> 00:16:20,770
Dude.
408
00:16:20,771 --> 00:16:24,274
They keep rubbing against me.
409
00:16:24,275 --> 00:16:25,525
It's too sexual.
410
00:16:25,526 --> 00:16:27,777
These guys are firecrackers.
411
00:16:27,778 --> 00:16:30,238
No mas gatos!
412
00:16:35,536 --> 00:16:38,538
Where are the cats?
413
00:16:38,539 --> 00:16:40,665
What cats?
414
00:16:40,666 --> 00:16:43,418
So, as you can see, lauren,
There are no cats here,
415
00:16:43,419 --> 00:16:44,669
And I'm totally fine.
416
00:16:46,088 --> 00:16:48,173
Oops, so sorry.
417
00:16:48,174 --> 00:16:50,300
Do you mind if I get this?
- take your time.
418
00:16:50,301 --> 00:16:53,386
I'll refill our saucers--
Glasses.
419
00:16:53,387 --> 00:16:57,182
Glasses.
420
00:16:57,183 --> 00:16:58,683
- hello?
- hey, lauren.
421
00:16:58,684 --> 00:17:00,602
It's ryan from--
From your group.
422
00:17:00,603 --> 00:17:03,605
Listen, you're gonna find this
To be very funny,
423
00:17:03,606 --> 00:17:05,148
But I have a small problem.
424
00:17:05,149 --> 00:17:06,524
You're surrounded by cats,
Aren't you?
425
00:17:06,525 --> 00:17:08,568
Right now,
They're pretty disorganized,
426
00:17:08,569 --> 00:17:10,195
But if they ever get
Their act together,
427
00:17:10,196 --> 00:17:12,447
I think the power
Will shift quickly.
428
00:17:12,448 --> 00:17:13,531
I'm beginning to think
Sonia's problem
429
00:17:13,532 --> 00:17:15,784
Was not her boyfriend.
- yeah.
430
00:17:15,785 --> 00:17:17,369
She wants a long-term,
Meaningful connection,
431
00:17:17,370 --> 00:17:18,620
But she's afraid
Of abandonment,
432
00:17:18,621 --> 00:17:21,122
So cats are a crutch
And a compulsion.
433
00:17:21,123 --> 00:17:23,124
They're not a cure.
- yeah, listen.
434
00:17:23,125 --> 00:17:25,835
While you said all that,
Two cats went into the corner
435
00:17:25,836 --> 00:17:28,338
And I'm fairly certain,
Just made another cat.
436
00:17:28,339 --> 00:17:29,673
I'll make you a deal.
437
00:17:29,674 --> 00:17:30,715
I'll take care of sonia,
438
00:17:30,716 --> 00:17:32,550
And you take care of the cats.
439
00:17:32,551 --> 00:17:34,469
Deal.
440
00:17:34,470 --> 00:17:36,221
Cats!
Cats!
441
00:17:36,222 --> 00:17:38,431
Ow, ow, ow.
God! Ow!
442
00:17:38,432 --> 00:17:39,724
Stop it!
Oww!
443
00:17:42,186 --> 00:17:43,395
Friend for life!
444
00:17:43,396 --> 00:17:44,854
Cats--ow.
445
00:17:44,855 --> 00:17:47,816
Ow, ow, ow, ow,
You minion of the antichrist.
446
00:17:47,817 --> 00:17:50,402
So the house is empty now,
447
00:17:50,403 --> 00:17:52,153
But I have 50 pounds
Of fresh kitty litter
448
00:17:52,154 --> 00:17:54,322
If anyone knows
Someone who wants it.
449
00:17:54,323 --> 00:17:55,700
Does anyone have any thoughts?
450
00:17:59,704 --> 00:18:01,746
Well, I have something
I would like to share.
451
00:18:01,747 --> 00:18:04,207
Ryan found homes
For all of the cats
452
00:18:04,208 --> 00:18:06,751
Except for one.
453
00:18:06,752 --> 00:18:08,628
- aww.
- so I thought it might be nice
454
00:18:08,629 --> 00:18:10,463
For us to have a group cat.
455
00:18:10,464 --> 00:18:12,590
You know, we could all
Take turns taking care of it,
456
00:18:12,591 --> 00:18:15,802
And it'll be a bond
That'll connect us
457
00:18:15,803 --> 00:18:16,886
For a really long time.
458
00:18:16,887 --> 00:18:17,887
Thank you, lauren.
459
00:18:17,888 --> 00:18:19,556
You're so wonderful.
460
00:18:19,557 --> 00:18:22,350
Aww.
461
00:18:22,351 --> 00:18:24,811
Hey. Hi.
462
00:18:24,812 --> 00:18:26,938
I just wanted to apologize.
463
00:18:26,939 --> 00:18:29,190
Turns out you are really good
At your thing,
464
00:18:29,191 --> 00:18:30,692
And I am so not.
465
00:18:30,693 --> 00:18:33,153
Yeah, um, don't ever
"Game show buzz" me again.
466
00:18:33,154 --> 00:18:34,279
What do you--
467
00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:35,905
- oh, I do--I did do that.
- you did.
468
00:18:35,906 --> 00:18:37,115
- didn't I?
- yeah.
469
00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:38,742
Yeah, listen,
I am never gonna try to help
470
00:18:38,743 --> 00:18:40,493
Anyone ever again.
- no, look.
471
00:18:40,494 --> 00:18:42,954
Everyone in the group
Has their own unique gift.
472
00:18:42,955 --> 00:18:45,540
Just bring what you bring,
473
00:18:45,541 --> 00:18:48,127
And trust that you can help
In your own way.
474
00:19:01,974 --> 00:19:03,433
Are we on the floor?
475
00:19:03,434 --> 00:19:05,518
Yep, best seats
In the house, george.
476
00:19:05,519 --> 00:19:07,771
I called in a few favors.
Here we go.
477
00:19:07,772 --> 00:19:11,816
Uh, $2,000 seats
For a blind man.
478
00:19:11,817 --> 00:19:14,235
You are weird, ryan king.
479
00:19:14,236 --> 00:19:16,529
White guys.
Am I right?
480
00:19:16,530 --> 00:19:17,989
They're all "This is
A good value proposition.
481
00:19:17,990 --> 00:19:19,574
"I think I'll
Make this purchase,
482
00:19:19,575 --> 00:19:21,659
And then I'll vote
For mitt romney."
483
00:19:24,705 --> 00:19:26,331
All right, enjoy the game.
484
00:19:26,332 --> 00:19:27,582
Here you go, george.
485
00:19:27,583 --> 00:19:29,542
Now, I want you
To experience this game
486
00:19:29,543 --> 00:19:32,670
Exactly the way you used to,
So, tonight,
487
00:19:32,671 --> 00:19:34,547
I'm gonna be your eyes.
488
00:19:34,548 --> 00:19:35,757
It's amazing.
489
00:19:35,758 --> 00:19:40,303
Sounds just the way
I remember it.
490
00:19:40,304 --> 00:19:42,389
Tastes like it too.
Mmm.
491
00:19:53,442 --> 00:19:54,609
Okay, here we go.
492
00:19:54,610 --> 00:19:56,986
Kobe's got the ball.
He takes it down.
493
00:19:56,987 --> 00:19:59,531
He's looking.
Pau gasol's open...
494
00:19:59,532 --> 00:20:00,907
Left-handed hook...
495
00:20:00,908 --> 00:20:02,701
Nothin' but net!
Yeah!
496
00:20:02,702 --> 00:20:04,994
All right, george, we're deep
Into the second quarter.
497
00:20:04,995 --> 00:20:07,664
Lakers are up 40 to 38.
- shut up.
498
00:20:07,665 --> 00:20:09,707
I'm--I'm sorry?
499
00:20:09,708 --> 00:20:11,710
You talk too much.
500
00:20:11,711 --> 00:20:13,837
Listen to the crowd,
501
00:20:13,838 --> 00:20:16,464
Sound of the ball,
502
00:20:16,465 --> 00:20:19,551
Sneakers squeaking
On the floor.
503
00:20:19,552 --> 00:20:22,720
Ah, ball just hit the rim.
504
00:20:22,721 --> 00:20:25,306
Yeah, they rebounded it.
505
00:20:25,307 --> 00:20:28,351
Oh, man!
Sounds like a foul.
506
00:20:28,352 --> 00:20:30,728
It was.
507
00:20:30,729 --> 00:20:34,399
I can hear this game
Better than you can see it.
508
00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:36,652
Just close your eyes
And listen.
509
00:20:41,532 --> 00:20:44,451
Heh, it's beautiful.
510
00:20:44,452 --> 00:20:46,619
Yeah.
511
00:21:06,056 --> 00:21:07,974
- oh?
- nice catch, george.
512
00:21:07,975 --> 00:21:10,059
You still got it.
- take this and run.
513
00:21:10,060 --> 00:21:11,394
I'm not givin' it back.
514
00:21:11,395 --> 00:21:12,937
Oh, they don't let you
Keep the ball.
515
00:21:12,938 --> 00:21:16,608
- run!
- okay.
516
00:21:16,609 --> 00:21:19,779
He went that way.
36828
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