All language subtitles for Stuck.In.The.Middle.S02E04.1080p.DSNP.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.H.264.DUAL-C76_Legendas02.ENG

Call me crazy,
but I always

look forward to
school photos.

I get to put them
on the mantle,

all smiling,
nobody's complaining

about dinner or chores
or who farted on who.

But these...

These...

And Harley, I don't even
know where to begin with this.

If I sent these to abuela,
she'd send them right back.

What happened?

When you're a Diaz
kid, you're always
explaining yourself.

But how do I explain this?

We're gonna need popcorn.

- And drinks.
- And something
for your headache.

- I don't have a headache.
- You will.

HARLEY: It all started
three weeks ago.

My school photo look
is totally natural.

Only took me eight hours
to make it look that way.

Eh, I slept in
these clothes.

You really wanna take
a good school photo?

Don't try so hard.

Congratulations.
You nailed it.

That shirt hasn't been
cool since Kesha had

a dollar sign
in her name.

Who cares?

After school, I get to do
the most awesome thing

in the history of things.
Mom, don't forget.

The science club is taking us
indoor skydiving.

It's the most awesome thing
in the history of things.

You've mentioned it
once or twice.

I recorded that
in your sleep.

She's right; I've
talked about it so much,

I even annoyed myself.

It's just, indoor skydiving
is like Christmas,

New Year's, Fourth of July,
all wrapped up in

a windy plastic tube.

Yay, science!
Yeah!

I made a sweet
countdown watch

so I can mark every second
till jump time.

It originally was
a countdown to summer watch,

but I repurposed.

Harley, I need to switch
spots with you

- at the next stoplight.
- Look, if Beast
peed in that seat...

No, I was sitting
where you are last Friday,

and we all remember
what happened last Friday.

Just say it.
You're going to anyway.

I hit my first ever
free throw!

Nothin' but net.

Well, it rolled around
a little bit, but it went in!

You're on a streak...
of one.

And to keep it going,
I have to do everything today

exactly like I did
last Friday.

Talk about
superstitious.

More like
better safe than sorry-stitious.

Hey, Mom, can you turn on
that cheesy yacht rock station

we yelled at you
to turn off last week?

- Happy to help
- Ugh.

(cheesy rock music plays)

I hate this station,
but gotta keep it on.

(Ethan grumbling)

(school bell rings)

(gasps)

Oy, yay, we got
a substitute.

Easy class day.

Yes! Substitute, skydiving.

Is this "international
Harley gets what she wants" day?

I think it is.

Oh, no.
It's Detention Delorco.

Oh, no.
Oh, no.

I don't know
who that is,

but I wanna
be supportive.

I've never
had him myself,

but he's legendary
in my family

for giving detentions.

And if I get
detention today...

(yells)

♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪

♪ Sometimes it feels like
things are outta control ♪

♪ Like you're living in
a circus ♪

♪ Tryin' to figure out
your way in the world ♪

♪ Where you're at
is kinda perfect ♪

♪ So turn it up,
turn it up ♪

♪ Do your thing,
don't stop ♪

♪ Let the games begin,
let's jump right in ♪

♪ I wanna get
stuck with you ♪

♪ In the middle
of the party ♪

♪ We're just
getting started ♪

♪ I wanna get
stuck with you ♪

♪ In the eye of the tornado,
rowin' in the same boat ♪

♪ I wanna get
stuck with you ♪

♪ Get stuck in
the middle with you ♪

♪ I wanna get
stuck with you ♪

No. This is the worst day
ever to meet this guy.

He has it in for
the Diaz kids.

Why would he have
a problem with your family?

They're great.

Being a Diaz means having
to answer for the mistakes

of every Diaz
who came before you.

RACHEL: That's mine.

Rachel Diaz, detention.

(alarm blaring)

ETHAN: That's mine.

Ethan Diaz, detention.

GEORGIE:
So sorry, that's mine.

Georgie Diaz, detention.

Sometimes I wish I could
just go by one name.

Just Harley,
like Sia or Drake.

I'm marked.

Before my butt
even hits the seat,

Delorco will find
a reason to send it
to detention.

My poor butt.
I wish you went
to a different school.

Your butt
belongs here.

You're amazing.

You built
a backyard roller coaster.

The only thing I ever built
was a healthy dislike
of kale chips.

I'd love to be you.

That's nice
of you to say,

but you've never
chipped your tooth

fighting for a spot
on the couch.

But you're an A+ Diaz.

A rock star.

Mr. Delorco will see that.

You're Harley.

I'm not Rachel, Ethan,
or Georgie.

You're right.
I am Harley.

Let me guess.

You must be
Harley Diaz.

No, that's me.

I'm Harley Diaz.

Of the Marshport Diazes.

I so did not see
that coming.

Probably the same way
Delorco didn't see the door.

Are we really doing this?

I'm Ellie Peters.

Sorry about your face.

At first I was thinking
something sparkly,

but that's, like,
"Look at me!"

Wrong. I want it
to be, like...

(low-key)
"Look at me."

Like you look,
but you don't know why.

9:33.
Took a bathroom break.

Don't have to go,
but winners make it happen.

Like Taylor Swift
and whoever she's
dating right now,

me and this shirt
are meant to be.

Hmm.

I think maybe your shirt
is seeing other people.

Hmm?

O-M-G!

Riley Diamont is not
wearing the same outfit as me.

I'm alphabetically right next
to her in the yearbook.

I cannot be twinsies
with a girl who snort-laughs.

Sloppy joes are back!

Sloppy joes are back.

Seven and a half
dark months

have finally
come to an end.

Banned for being
too sloppy.

And I fought
to bring you back.

This is the greatest day
in American history.

You're not hearing
me, Mom.

It's an alpha level
twinsy situation.

I understand yours is also
a matter of life and death,

but I'll get there
when I can.

(frustrated groan)

That woman is so selfish.

Ethan, you have to
help me find a new outfit.

Borrow one from
your friends.

They must have
something in their lockers.

Kiki's over-plaiding,

and the only thing
in Zia's locker are
books. Books!

Everyone knows a locker
is a second closet.

Go to Lost and Found.

It's where I get wardrobe
for my movies.

Even props. You read
my script about the yo-yo.

I don't want anyone to see me
rifling through someone's

scuzzy old clothes.
That's a loser move.

You do it.

I would love to help,

but I've got a date
with a sandwich named Joe.

Do you?

It would be a real shame
if someone called the school

with a food fight scare,

and bounced Joe
from today's menu.

- Food fight?
- Mm-hmm.

That's how it was
banned the last time.

History can't repeat itself.

Hey, Miles, remember
last Friday,

you laughed at the toilet paper
dragging from my shoe?

- Not really.
- Well, you did.

Yuck it up.

The quadratic formula.

I don't know
what I was thinking.

I was trying to
protect you, and it
just popped out of my mouth.

"I'm Harley Diaz."

Terrifying,
but I did like
the sound of it.

Well, like the sound
of it quieter.

If Delorco finds out,
it's bye-bye, skydiving,

hello, detention.

Forget freefall.
I won't be free until fall.

Oh, I'm too soft
for detention.

It's a tough crowd.

The gelled-back hair,
the leather jackets.

Okay, you gotta stop
watching Grease.

No one's gonna
get detention.
We got this.

Oh, Mr. Delorco.

Could I have an important
word with my sister?

We're in the middle
of class.

It's a matter
of life and death.

I need to find out
what I had for lunch last week.

Say good-bye, Ms. Diaz.

Bye, sis.

Nice touch,
but that was close.

We got lucky. Georgie
doesn't usually give up
that easily.

GEORGIE: Harley.

Why are you
saying my name?

- I'm not.
- Harley.

Harley. Harley!

- Hey, Harley.
- Stop calling me that.
Go away.

I just army-crawled
through three pieces of gum,

and what I'm hoping
was ketchup to get here.

Now tell me what I had
for lunch last week.

I'm Harley;
maybe I can help.

- Why is she Harley?
- Because I'm Ellie.

What?!

That's right,
I'm Ellie,

she's Harley.

Harley who loves rewarding
her non-blabby friends

with a free slushy
from her Slushy Shack.

Diaz, detention.

And the next time I see you
crawling around my classroom,

it better be
fire safety week.

Hey, I got detention
last Friday, too.

It happened around 1:47,
but I'll take it now.

Thanks, Mr. D.

There's the door.

What kind of sicko
threatens a food fight

the day a sandwich
makes its glorious comeback?

The kind who's so desperate,
she might wearing something

from a box
that has a moldy pizza in it.

Looky, looky.
We have a winner.

Ugh.

Everybody likes cats.
Am I right?

If the person who wore that
goes to this school,

I need to transfer.

I can't believe
we made it out of there.

My heart is racing.

Probably won't beat this fast
during skydiving.

I'll be happy if mine
never beats this fast again.

I feel like I've
been juggling lightning.

You did good.
I couldn't have
been a better me myself.

It's Delorco.
Quick, other way.

Oh, no.

Our mom is here.

Harley, hurry up.
We're waiting to hear the rest.

Seriously. You leave at the most
tense moment of the entire story

to get more popcorn?

That's what
good storytellers do.

They make you wait for it.

- So where were we?
- Delorco on one side,

and Mom on the other.
World's lamest showdown.

Your story is about
digging through
the Lost and Found,

so maybe lose
the attitude.

This portion's about me,
so I wouldn't mind hearing it.

Hi. Mr. Delorco.

Always a pleasure.

I just came by to give
this to my daughter.

- Oh! That's for Harley.
- Yes, thank you.

Oh, I almost forgot.
Harley, could you get that...

Harley, could you
get that...

...to Rachel?

You bet.
Thanks, Mom.

I gave blood earlier, so
my head's still a little swimmy.

Maybe I should
have one of these.

To stop the wooziness.

They said,
"Take as many as you want,"

but I just took these and
the six other boxes in my car.

To stop the wooziness.
I'm gonna go.

Kinda filled in the blanks
for me on the Diaz family.

Ditto that, Mr. D...

...lorco.
That's a lovely tie.

Hey, Chet, I need you to
think long and hard,

because I have
a very important question.

What did you serve
for lunch last Friday?

Fish and chips,
absolutely sure.
I'd bet my life on it.

Oh, because for a minute,
I was thinking

- it was meatball subs.
- Right. That was it.

Great. Give me
one of those.

Uh, today's Sloppy joes.

That weird floppy-haired kid
with the petition

finally got what he wanted.

Sloppy joes,
meatball's messy cousin.

Meat, bun. Oh, we've got
the building blocks here.

Would you mind
balling up some meat,

plopping it onto a bun,

and kind of smooshing the bun
into a longer shape?

Yeah. I've been warned
about squeezing the food.

Can't do it.

I'm under a lot of
pressure here,

trying to create
a winning streak,

so I'm not moving
till I get something

that resembles
a meatball sub.

I've ridden a lot of
benches, Chet, I know
how to wait.

(sighs)
This day's been
an emotional roller coaster.

At least,
that's what I've heard.

My mom only lets me
ride the merry-go-round.

This day's been
an emotional merry-go-round.

(clock chiming)

Only two more hours,
and I'm flying high.

Ain't no stoppin'
Harley/Ellie/whoever
I am now!

(painful groaning)

What was that?

I'll be taking over
for Miss Parsons

until her nose
stops bleeding.

I hope young Ellie Peters
has learned a valuable lesson

about doors, and how
they open.

Not that I'm agreeing
with him or anything,

but really, Harley,
how hard is it to
open a door?

Look, we've already
done this once.

We just have to keep
a low profile,
and we're golden.

Ellie Peters.

Ellie Peters!

That's you,
golden girl.

Yep. That's me.

According to Miss Parsons'
lesson plan,

you're giving your
biology presentation today.

Yes, of course.

Remind me
what it is again.

Bird calls.
The sweet song of nature.

Bird calls? Really?

This isn't my fault.

I invited you
to birdcall camp.

It's true, she did.

But knowing what I know now,

I still probably
wouldn't have gone.

Here's your Frankensub.
Now get out of here,

- or I'll get
written up again.
- Absolutely.

But first, do you remember
where I sat last Friday?

Look, all I remember
about last Friday

is that some idiot
spilled a meatball sub,

and I had to
clean it up.

Got it all over me.

Heads up, don't go
to a dog park with
meatball sub pants,

unless you wanna leave
with just a waistband.

Wait. I was that idiot
who spilled their sub.

I humiliated myself.

Oh, I could totally
do that again.

I have every reason
to believe that's true.

Okay, one, two, three,
trip, spill on myself,

or one, two, three,
spill on myself, trip?

Guess I'll have to
find it in the moment.

One, two...

All suited up
and ready for a joe-down.

Yes. Trip then spill.
That's how I did it.

I am so sorry.
I'll go get some napkins.

And maybe change if
you're going to a dog park.

I wish with
all my heart

you'd taken that joe bib
when I offered it.

Gross!

Hey, who threw
that at me?

Sorry. Accidental flick.

Everyone, calm down.

Food fight!

As you know,
I am Ellie Peters,

whose friend Harley
will give a slushy

and a soft pretzel to anyone
who enjoys this presentation
without comment.

We have a fascinating
20-minute film on mitochondria

to get to. Let's hear
your bird calls, Ms. Peters.

Ah, yes. Bird calls.

The calls that
come from birds.

Our winged friends
from the great blue yonder.

In five seconds, I start
the film and you get a D.

Seagull, seagull.

Crow, crow.

Uh, card... inal.

Uh... cardinal!

I find it hard to believe
that those are actual birdcalls.

- Hey.
- That's a pigeon; I'm only
giving you half credit.

And you owe me
a tuna sandwich.

That's half more
than I deserve.

(phone rings)

- DELORCO: Yes?
- I thought you did super.

Wow. You are
a really good friend.

Cardinal?
Come on.

Diaz, that was
the office.

You're late for
Friday announcements.

Great. On it.
I'm all about it.

I have to do
Friday announcements?

I can't speak to
the entire school.

You have to.

If you don't...

Detention.

Being a Diaz
is too much pressure.

It's scary
and stomach churny.

You can do this,

because today,
you're Harley,

and someone once told me
she's an A+ Diaz.

A rock star.

She is.

Let's go, Diaz.

Or are you waiting for
a bird to call you down there?

Seven and a half months
I campaigned

to get that sandwich back.

I even tried rebranding it
the tasty joe,

to highlight
its better qualities.

People are already
lining up for photos.

I'm just gonna have
to suck it up and wear
my original shirt.

Where is it?

I think I found it.

She's rockin' it.

I can't believe
it's come to this.

Come to what?

(kids meowing)

- Hey, cool shirt.
- Really?

No. I just told somebody
that last Friday.

Day repeated.

Man, sports are exhausting.

I'm Harley Diaz.

I'm Harley Diaz.
Really cool girl,

excellent person.
I can do anything.

(feedback whines)

( clears throat,
feedback whines )

Good day,
Marshport Terriers.

In breaking news,

today's basketball game
has been canceled

due to a food fight in
the school multi-purpose room.

No!!

As a reminder,
the school bus will be leaving

after school for
a field trip

to the Wind Beneath My Wings
Skydiving Institute.

Hey, my best friend
Harley's doing that...

I mean, I'm doing that.

I'm Harley.
Ask anybody.

Please don't.

(coughing over P.A.)

Let's just skip right to
the word of the day.

Oh, no, I forgot.

Today's word is the longest
word in the dictionary.

Took me a whole week
to learn how to pronounce it.

Ellie's going to black out
just looking at it.

Pneumonoul...

tramicroscopic...

silico...

volcanoconiosis!

Yes. She did it!

Yes, yes!

What?

Ellie Peters really
loves the word of the day.

(whispers)
Yes.

I did it.

I am Harley Diaz.

I am...

Harley Diaz.

Way to go, Harley.

Back atcha,
Harley.

Harley Diaz,
you're up.

Harley Diaz,
you're up.

Harley Diaz?

You're up.

Harley Diaz!

(bell rings)

Well, we did it.
Let's promise to
never do this again.

You can count on it.

I've learned my lesson about
being brave and spontaneous.

There's the Ellie
I know and love.

Oh, poor Ethan.

Who threw that?

That would be me.

Harley Diaz.

Detention.

No, wait--

I'm Harley Diaz.

Ellie, I can't just--

Yes, you can.
That's what friends do.

(watch chiming)

Hey, Mr. Delorco.

You don't know Diaz.

Sorry, watch.
Not happening.

It's easy to focus
on the negative.

To take being a Diaz
for granted.

What are you two
in for?

BOTH: Food fight.

But every now and then,

it takes an honorary Diaz
to remind you

how special
it really is.

Well, I guess that answers
all my questions.

Except for one.

What's gonna happen
when Ellie's mother

opens her pictures?

(doorbell rings)

Everyone hide!