All language subtitles for Je Vous Salue Marie (avec Le Livre De Marie).1985.720p.BluRay.x264.en

THE BOOK OF MARY

What do you think?

You'll escape routine
if you're alone?

No, that's not it.

I just can't stand this deal,

putting up with anything
as long as we stay together.

You always come back to that.

Admit it:

you're so afraid of being abandoned,
you're fleeing into loneliness.

You should know by now.

Since you're here, for once,
let's be serious.

Seeing you
is hardly a blessing now.

Even for Mary, it's no good.

And I've had it.

I can't work, I can't sleep.

I see:

if we separate
you'll sleep again?

You see how brutal you are?

You're brutal too, in your way.

You won't face up to things.

Listen, Paul, you've cheated
on the contract from the start.

You can't brush that off.

I think it takes constant
inventiveness to succeed.

In your line of work,
you've lots of time for that.

It doesn't interest you,
that's all.

So we play it safe
and stay together.

What's that do for the child?

Loving's not investing.
You can save, too,

not just give, or expect everything
from one person.

The way you've set things up,
you could talk that way.

You're never here.
I spend much more time at home.

I put a lot in
and get little back.

We've been over this so often.

What other way is there?

Before, you didn't work,
you took care of Mary.

But now we're closer
to an even footing.

I don't agree.

I'm still here serving,
caring for things.

That's a mother's job,
not a woman's.

I'm tired.

Things have got to change
for a while.

You're so impatient.

Maybe.

What I know now

is that I don't need to be
dominated to feel understood.

I no longer need to lose.

I don't see where
that gets you, either.

I don't know.

I want to see clearly.

I wish you understood.

Understanding's scarce.

Truth is often deadly.
Your truths are fatal,

so don't complain afterward.

I'm not complaining,
just trying to see clearly.

Why's everyone so scared of clarity?

Your eyes hurt?

No, I'm all right.

I don't need
your total sincerity.

It's comforting,
but not interesting.

Let's not start again.

No, let's not.

But try to understand sometimes.

For 10 years we've copied.

Now I need to invent.

No one's stopped you.

Anyway, women don't invent much.

Even the soul
was invented by a man.

You're really encouraging.

You don't need
encouragement now.

We can see how well
you do on your own.

Good morning!
We continue with our operation.

Now we cut the eye in half.

It's black, if you can see that.

I put this inside.
It's the pupil.

The pupil, seen from outside,
magnified, of course,

is brown.

The eye is huge,

but the pupil takes up
a lot of space.

The rest is water.

That's right, water.

The pupil floats like a baby
in its mother's belly.

When you look at things,
it's because of the pupil,

because it floats,

and when we move,

as you see, it shifts.

Understand what I'm saying?

It's complicated.
A bit technical.

Yes, it's mechanical
and technical

and surgical too.

You operate once
for this illness.

If you do it twice,
the patient dies.

In any case,

the eye withers.

It's a very serious operation.

Yes, I entirely agree there.

You undergo it after
you've almost been sick.

Because this gentleman...
you see his eye...

has been completely...shaken, see?

It's had a shock.

This eye has been
completely terrorized,

SO,

we can't do much for it.

Well, that's all for this program.

Good-bye.

Spoken to Mary?

Not yet,

but I will, of course.

And you'll have to tell her
what keeps you so far from her,

from me.

You've thought of what
it'll mean to her,

shuttling between parents?

Stop talking as if
this was all my doing.

Silence, please.

"My spirit
with a heavy fear forebodes

"In black battalions,
stray ghosts ride

"Driving me on to moving roads

"closed in by bloodied skies
on every side.

"How strange and wicked
was our act?

"Can you explain my trouble
and my fright?"

Silence!

I said, silence!

Who can tell me

what Baudelaire meant
to express in this poem?

If you weren't asleep,
that is.

Get out your notebooks.
I'll give you some dictation.

Hurry!
We have other things to do.

"My spirit
with a heavy fear forebodes...

"Heavy fear,

"black battalions,"

with two "t's",

and "stray ghosts..."

Silence!

Yes?

Mary, I have something
to tell you.

All right, go on. And make sure
you've made no spelling errors.

I have to talk to the principal.

I'm sure you know what it is.

Dad's going to live elsewhere
for a while.

Until winter, for example.

Right. To continue:

"that seek to lead me
on shifting ways..."

You'll see Dad on weekends
and holidays.

It's not for long.

"Have we committed
a strange act? Explain if..."

It's not that we don't
love each other any more.

On the contrary.

But if he stays here
we'll quarrel.

There's no cause to worry.
I'd tell you if there were.

Believe me.
You can trust me.

Why don't you want us
to go to Capri?

Because you're an ass.

You scare me, Paul.

Don '2' just stand there,
answer me!

I'll just take a few things.
Won't be long.

I'm sorry.

I'm in a hurry, Mary.

You go to Capri, Paul.

See you Saturday. OK?

Tell me...

about when I was little.

Again!

Go ahead.

You seem particularly fond
of hearing that.

You're right.

It's the strongest memory
of love.

It's hard to recover
that strength

without going backward.

You just have to be able
to give and accept.

I'll prepare something to eat.
See you downstairs.

Dry your hair well.

Hi!

What's up?

I'm taking a train.

Where're you going?

To see my father.

Doesn't he live here?

Not right now.

- Your folks divorced?
- No, they're not.

That your bear?

I'm glad my folks
aren't divorced.

You have no luck.

That's enough.

Hi, Mimi.

My name's not Mimi,
it's Mary.

- Where're you going?
- To see my father.

That's right, he's gone away.

It's good for him, a little...

- It's no big deal.
- Of course not.

And you can travel with your bear,
so it's no trouble.

It's not a bear,
it's a panther.

Of course. You're right.

I'm a dumbbell about animals...
I don't know.

Where're you going?

Passing the time.
I'm on relief.

I'm not working these days.

I stay at home.
I've a lot of housework,

I like my place to be clean,
you see.

- Get bored?
- Not at all.

Because I study my own case.

And I have my afternoons
programmed.

I go out on my bike, my moped,
whatever you want to call it.

It takes me everywhere.

I get back at 7 or 9
in the evening.

If it's nice out,
I take my time.

I stop where I please.

"Forever damned
be the feckless dreamer

"who, in his stupidity,
first strove,

"enamored of an insoluble
and sterile problem,

"to mix honesty with love."

Have you studied triangles?

We've just started.

I have to know
the 4 types for Monday.

Know what a jagged line is?

One that changes direction.

Yes, but how?

By forming angles.

And an angle?

It's when the lines close.

And when they meet?

That's the apex.

Also called an intersection.

An angle's like this.

Like this, too.

No, it's like this.

To get that,
you first need this.

All right.

There are 4 kinds of triangles.

The right-angle triangle.

It looks like this.

The side opposite the right angle
is the hypotenuse.

The equilateral triangle

has 3 equal sides.

The isosceles triangle...

You listening, Mary?

The isosceles
has two equal sides,

and the scalene
has 3 unequal sides.

Draw them.
Helps you to remember them.

Are you hungry?

Terribly.

Want a bite?

That's the concerto
I liked so much?

That's the one.

- Don't recognize it?
- Oh, yes.

No, not really, in fact.

Sounds like talk,
don't you think?

People in a discussion.

Agreeing or disagreeing?

A bit of both.

Changes of mood,
icy, exasperated,

I demand,

fire, fire, careful,
error, horror, suffering...

Hey, calm down.

There's a Mahler symphony
I can't find.

- Ask Mom for it next time.
- OK.

Bring your pajamas, too.

Don't forget
your toothbrush again.

We've got to go now.
It's time.

You ready?

Are you dead or just tired?

Dead.

But everything that happens
should interest you.

You're so curious.

You surprise me.

It's not like before.

Nothing can stay the same.

It becomes...

It becomes different.

When a thing stops moving,

it's dead.

You must have confidence.

Sure, still,
it's not like before.

In French, Mary is "Marie".
Know what it makes?

What?

A-I-M-E-R: to love.

You're beautiful!
Your dress is beautiful.

We'll be late.
We must be going.

The hairdo becomes you.

Think so?
It's not my favorite.

You're darling, really.

I'll leave you the number.

If something comes up, call.
I won't be home late.

Don't forget tomorrow.
I get to go out.

I haven't forgotten.

We must be going.

I have to go, dear.

Don't watch TV too late.

I'll kiss you when I come in.

It would be killing the unification
of Europe in the egg.

This business must be smothered,

in the egg-

Can't make an omelet
without breaking eggs.

So...

I don't know.

Get lost!

It's the only way.

AT THAT TIME

VIRGIN MARY

Out of my mouth is shit.

Stop talking.

Stop eating.

AT THAT TIME

With you,
silence can be unbearable.

We can get married,
if you like.

I'm not afraid.

Maybe that could help us.

I wonder...

What?

All women
want something unique.

Can't you see I'm not listening?

You know,

men think they enter a woman.

AT THAT TIME

How are you doing with Mary?

That's my business.

Listen, Mary,
when there's a break-out, move fast.

"I wondered if some event
would happen in my life."

"I've had only the shadow of love,
yes,

"in fact,
the shadow of a shadow,

"like the reflection
of a water lily in a pond,

"not quiet, but shaken
by ripples in the water,

"so that even the reflection
is deformed and not yours..."

So the sun, visible at last,

began to shine
on the primeval oceans,

and then, it's said,
life appeared

entirely by chance.

There was hydrogen, nitrogen...

AT THAT TIME

What if it wasn't chance?

100 times that of the universe?

What does that mean?

That there was never time,

chance had no time.

Since life
hadn't time to appear...

On earth!

...Then it came from elsewhere,

from space.

We wonder what
an extra-terrestrial looks like.

Go to a mirror
and look at yourself.

It's just a hypothesis,
but...

Look at this dip.

It can only be explained...

by something in this cloud
intercepting light...

at a specific wavelength.

There is a bacteria,
of a very common sort,

that absorbs light
on 3.4 microns.

That's its signature.

Any body, inert or alive,

leaves its special mark
on the electronic field.

In my opinion,

this establishes

a very strong presumption

that life exists in space.

We're from there.

We are extra-terrestrials.

We weren't born
in an amino-acid soup,

suddenly, by chance.

No deal.

The figures say "no".

What if it wasn't chance?

Exactly.

The astonishing truth is

that life was willed,

desired,

anticipated,

organized,

programmed by
a determined intelligence.

Eve, stand behind Pascal.

My name's Eva.

Yes, stand behind Pascal
and cover his eyes.

They say it would take
1.35 trillion years...

to find the solution blindfolded,
but...

if there's someone beside you
who can see,

and says no to every wrong move,

and yes to every move
toward a solution,

at the rate of one move
per second,

how long's needed?

2 minutes.

From 1.35 trillion years
to 2 minutes.

That's what happened.

Memory!

Yes... Yes...

No!

Were you exiled
for these ideas?

These...and others.

See you Monday.

Is the law of falling bodies
because life fell from the sky?

Yes. Good-bye.

- Well!
- Coming?

Like a drink
at my place one evening?

That's another story.

Your shoe!

"The question is if this creature
called man ever existed."

"Legendary man is a figment
of the popular imagination..."

While there are Bourbons in Spain
there'll be no peace.

That's not your line,
Uncle Gabriel!

Right!

- Straight ahead.
- Where's that?

Here's $500.

It's closed.

How about there?

No, there should be
a house alongside.

What are you looking for?

Here!

Stop at this station.

Here's $500, for God's sake.

We'll be back!

You've a daughter, Mary?

What's it about?

Mary...

She's here!

For God's sake!

Mary, help!

What's going on?

Why're you here?
We said Saturday.

Don't, Dad, it's Joseph.

They brought me here.

I'm sick of your tricks.

Forget it!

OK, what is it?

It's you...

It's you, Mary.

What do you want?

What do you want?

And you, my lady?

Your fiancée?

What's it to you?

We couldn't care less.

But you're going to have a child.

BY Whom?

- You'll have a baby.
- I sleep with no one.

Mary, shit,
who are these people?

Drive on!
Here's $500.

BY Whom?

It won't be his.
Never!

BY Whom?

Don't play innocent!

BY Whom?

Mary,

be pure, be rough.
Follow Thy way.

My way!
But the voice or the word?

Don't be silly!

I know where you're going
and soon you will too.

Don't forget!

Don't forget,
what goes in, goes out.

And what goes out, goes in!

I'm tired. Shall we stop?

"We each go on,

"and each of us attains
what he can reach."

Holderlin...his last work.

Those ants are strictly
the invisible man.

I swear it was here!

You never find ants near water.

Wrong. Some ants seek gold.

I read "Scientific American" too.

- What about these ants?
- Olivier found an anthill.

He rigged wiring
to warm the ants in winter.

He wanted to keep them awake
in winter,

hoping they'd use that leisure time,
to invent things.

- What?
- Music, maybe.

There's no escape.

What is this?
Miracles don't exist.

Kiss me.

What is all this?

There's no escape,
for us.

AT THAT TIME

Let's go on with our story.

Imagine...

our descendants
in 8 million years, 100 million.

Their wisdom and knowledge
are unimaginable today.

They suddenly notice

that the supposedly fixed balance
of the universe

is subtly changing.

Won't our descendants

try to preserve life?

Kiss me.

- I kiss you, I do.
- Just once, Mary.

You should trust me.

A prior intelligence
programmed life.

It struggled to exist

in a pitiless universe.

It preserved life.

AT THAT TIME

How'd you think of it?

Because of computers.

When I consider it...

that computer intelligence
stuns me.

If our distant descendants

tried to encode

life as they know it

in a message of magnesium,

or Bohr,

or God knows what...

GOD

wouldn't they try to transmit
the secret of Creation?

Maybe the message
has always been clear.

Yes, that Voice
deep in our consciences

whispers, if we listen:

you're born of something,
somewhere else, in Heaven.

Seek and you will find more
than you dream of.

Come to see the princess?

You can't fall any lower.

Who asked you?

Do I tell him to come?

Leave me alone.

- Why not tell the truth?
- I am.

Maybe the words come out wrong,

or it's my voice,

but it's the truth.

Be simpler if you said
you've seen other men.

I sleep with no one.

So where's the child from?

Where's it come from?

Answer me!

Look at me!

I'm looking at you.

The child must come from somewhere.

For 2 years now
I can't touch you. Why?

Kiss me.

I don't know, Joseph.

By God! It's incredible!

Call, or stop by the theater.

Please kiss me.

Not that way.

I do kiss you, really.

You must be sleeping around.
It's the only answer.

Guys with big cocks!

We're through, Mary.
Ciao!

Hi! You here too?

I keep dreaming.
Can't sleep. It wears me out.

Last night,
before I went home,

I dreamed I had to paint
the whole building.

I thought: that'll take time.

That'll take time.
I couldn't sleep.

Must be a reason.
You should make notes.

Yes, but I can't write,
so I draw.

If it's a picture,
you can't forget.

I must learn to write,
if I want to forget.

That's it.

Your Dad well?

Yes, thanks.

Still pumping gas?

He wants out.

You getting married soon?

Broken up with Joseph?

He seemed serious.

What's wrong, Mary?

I've got a pain.

In the belly.

We'll have a look.

Take her blood pressure,
Esther.

Go next door and undress.
Be right there.

You must put on weight.

You'll be fine.

Does the soul have a body?

What you mean, young lady,
is that the body has a soul.

I thought it was the opposite.

Doctor!

I must be pregnant.

When was your last period?

Take off your panties
and lie down there.

It's no use.

What?

I didn't hear you.

I've always wondered
what we know about a woman,

and I found
that all you can know

is what a man already knew.

There's a mystery there.

Do you want this child?

Was it with Joseph?

It wasn't with anybody.

Some song and dance!
Lie down.

It's no song and dance.
I'm happy.

Now tell me about your period.

I must examine you,
if you say it hurts.

It came normally, very intense.

- When?
- Friday.

Then quit being stupid.
It's nothing.

See for yourself!
I haven't slept with anyone.

I touch no one.

No one caresses me.

I want you to see
if my baby's already there.

You're hiding something from us.

I'm not, I tell you.

You see?

I'm going to have a baby
and I've slept with no man.

Joseph won't believe it.

You tell him.

Lie Still!

Will you hurt me?

Don't be afraid.

I was there when you were born.

Being a virgin should mean...

being available,

or free,

not being hurt.

Well, do you believe me?

It's true that it's true.

Tell Joseph.

Esther!

May I get dressed?

It must be mine!

Where to now?

Paradise villa, Hermance road.

- I quit work at 5 P.M.
- Sure, that's OK.

- Is it in France?
- It's very close. You'll see.

It's as pretty
as Czechoslovakia.

Well?

"Yet I rejoiced in giving
my body to the eyes...

"of Him who has become
my Master forever,

"and glanced
at this wondrous being.

"For in truth, He was that,
then and always,

"not for His looks
nor what He did,

"but in the silent power
of what He was,

"the power gathered up in Him,
vast as a mountain on the sky

"that you can't measure or name,

"but only feel."

Tonight?

No, I've got a practice session.

OK, I'll go jump in the lake!

Jump in the lake?

Ophelia's no role for you.

What are you talking about?

"To be or not to be..."
Don't know it?

I had to quit school
when I was 12.

Sorry.

I must go.

OK, I'll go jump in the lake!

No, stop it!

What's on your mind?

Night changes
its own look and meaning.

Heidegger,
"3 lectures in the..."

"...Bavarian Academy."

- Winter of '59.
- Yes.

Know why he wasn't shot?

As soon as we talk politics,
you clam up.

I think politics today...

must be the voice of horror.

The voice,
but the way or the word?

The voice of horror,
of which nothing can be said.

Can I put this on?

What is it?

You can't find that in Prague.

You OK?

A smoke, a sax solo,
that's all a man wants.

I often wonder that in music...

What?

We marvel at a new phrase, but,

really, there could be nothing.

This is the time.

And the place.

Yes?

No, not tonight.

"I think the spirit acts on
the body, breathes through it,

"veils it to make it fairer
than it is.

"For what is flesh alone?"

I have business. I'll be in late.
Write down the pump figures.

Yes, Dad.

"What is flesh...

"alone?

"You may see it
and feel only disgust.

"You may see it in the gutter,
drunken,

"or in the coffin, dead.

"The world's as full of flesh
as a grocer's counter is of candles

"at the start of winter.

"But not until you've brought
a candle home

"and lit it

"can it give you comfort."

Come on...

Don't you like my body?

That's not it.

Then what?

- It's because of her.
- I don't know.

It's making me sick.
I don't know.

I know, it's her.

It always is.

I'm a real woman, too.

I'd like to love you,
but I don't know how.

Let's go home.

Come on.

I'm coming.

You're complicating things,
don't you think?

What?

If God exists,
nothing's allowed.

What are you doing
with that tramp?

No, Uncle Gabriel.
Not like that!

When he's around,
I forget my lines! It's awful.

He's a real nothing.
Got the list?

What list?

He wants to know everything.

Like everyone!

He doesn't even know
how to walk his dog.

Like everyone.

He's scared of the hole.

Like everyone.

He has no taste in ties.

Like everyone.

- Zero equals zero.
- He lacks trust...

That's no fault.

What's the common denominator
between zero and Mary?

Mary's body!

- Answer, nitwit!
- Dunno!

He wears blind man's glasses,
the dolt.

Try and follow the movement...

Not with your hand,
your eyes!

- She'll make a fool of me!
- He won't look me in the eyes.

- If some guy's knocked her up...
- We're not "some guy"!

Have trust!

Trust!

I've none left.

And love, you jerk!

Love...

I've come.

What's wrong?
Your eyes again?

- What's the book?
- It's for you.

"Into the maze of life
goes the dashing young man.

"The best horse,
the finest armor and clothes,

"to be a knight, a lord,
a prince, he wants it all.

"But Someone unseen awaits him
without weapon, title or pride: God!"

- Thanks a lot!
- Don't want it?

I like my book better.

Would've been a change.

I'll pass it up.

He's funny: he calls the rain
"Sister Rain"...

and the fire: "Brother Fire".

And the body?

What about the body?

The body...

The body...

The body... "Brother Donkey".

Why does my body repel you?
Don't say: "I kiss you, I do".

I'm scared, too.

All this doesn't happen every day.

So I'm a bit scared.

One's better as a pair...

Why don't you believe
the spirit affects the body?

I believe the opposite!

That scares me.

At least say you don't love me.

I can't stand the silence.

Brother Silence!

I know you love me.
But it has to be something else.

You don't care if we see each other,
or if I'm sick or dead.

Am I alive?

Maybe I can only harm you.

I don't understand.

It's a big secret.

My love...

We don't know how to say it.

So immense

that all is consumed

and you'll leave me.

Anyway, I must know.

Know what?

The hand of God is upon me
and you can't interfere.

What now?

- I must go home.
- There was no point in coming.

Your body's not the snag,
it's your lack of trust!

Why can't I want
the child to be mine?

Tell me who you did it with.

I don't care,
if you stay with me.

If I stay with you, sleep with you,
wake up with you.

And Juliette?

I don't love her.
I love you.

Very well.

Look.

Give me your hand.

Come on, by God!

There, feel.

You see,
I'm sleeping with no one.

But I'll still have a child.
You must believe it.

I'll only be your shadow.

God's shadow.
Isn't that what all men are...

for a woman
who loves her man...

Let the soul be body.

Then no one can say the body is soul,
since the soul shall be body.

Thy will be done...

Yes, she's married.

Who is it?

I got your letter.

So basketball's like that!

Exhaustion, winning...

Exhaustion...

What did you mean by:

"That's not enough."

You said
you could see I loved you.

Yes.

I see it.

But you said that's not enough.

You'll find something.

What do you do all day now?

Talk to me.

It's unbelievable,
he never comes.

I've waited for 4 days.

I fixed the motor,
put in a phone and video.

It's all working.

He phones to say he's coming,
but by evening he hasn't shown up.

Rich folks are weird.

AT THAT TIME

Which one is it?

The big white one there.

AT THAT TIME

Can I go see it?

Yes.

We're getting married:
can I see you naked...

just once.

I'll only look.

Yes.

You'll look.

It's been ages since I've had
a normal conversation.

Yet nature prevails.

I want to talk, like others.

Because, though I hide it,
I'm in pain, like others.

Even a bit more.

They'll wrest from me
that which I dare not give.

You'll act chastely with me.

Don't take from someone
who never took from you.

To be chaste
is to know every possibility,

without ever straying.

"That's an impossible task!

"To accomplish it,
one has to admit...

"that the stars we see at night

"are vast worlds
located very far from ours...

"...and everyone knows,

"that stars are just lamps
hanging from the sky,

"most of which
are very close to us.

"For us, maybe the best explanation
of our origins

"is this idea of another world,
located farther in space.

"It is only, he said,

"a legendary deformation
of Horla's idea of the world

"whose dogs knew of it
since ancient times..."

Go, Arthur.

The time has come.

I'll go see the boss lady.

This time I think we've won.

I no longer
wish to understand.

Does it matter
what I am or am not?

No, not already!

We can't escape one another
any more than...

we can escape him.

Mary, what are you doing?

Stop it!

Tell me you love me.

I love you.

BU'! Why?

Why?

Because!

Because it's Law!

- Got it?
- Yes.

- I'll sacrifice myself.
- Asshole!

First, a hole isn't a hole.

Second:
Taboo wipes out sacrifice.

But why?

Because that's the rule!

I love you.

Is that "I love you"?

Is that it?

That?

"Suddenly a light
shone in my heart,

"warm and gentle
as a glowing fire.

"What, on earth,
or even heaven,

"beats knowing you please
the One you love,

"and Who is your master?

"I remember what He said about sin,
as we watched the dragonflies:

"if you thought of it rightly,
it just wasn't there.

"It was gone like
the shrouds of dragonflies,

"when they wrestled free."

We're speaking His Word.

How else can we be close to His Word
than by speaking it?

Yes? What?

We're speaking,
and we're speaking of the Word.

What we're speaking of,
the Word, is always ahead of us.

Then you won't leave me?

I'll stay.

I'll never touch you.

I'll stay.

Don't believe
the dollar'll fall.

Don't believe
vacation will be fun.

You can believe
rain falls downward.

It's a law of nature.

The world's too sad!

It isn't sad. It's big!

I must go.

Don't I count for you?

My wife and son count too.

Now that I've a visa, I must
go see what's going on, no?

Understand?

How much
do your wife and son count?

I don't get it.

Bastard!

I'm sorry.

You say your wife's in jail,
and you sleep with me.

- Please, Eve.
- Eva.

It's all over with Eve.

Go on, beat it,
since it's what you want.

Give me back my 32,000 francs.

I'll send it to you.

You really are a nothing.

What makes a soul is its pain.

He'll be the first
to hear my pain for them.

And He told me:

Daughter, I'm suffocating
to see you suffocate.

God's a creep, a coward who
won't fight, who counts on ass alone,

that is, on a quiet heart,
for existence,

an excess of ingress.

I want no carnal joy:

I don't want to wear out
my heart in one go,

or my soul, in one go.

Even pain
won't get me in one go,

and I won't disappear into it.

It will disappear with me.

It will always be horrible
for me to be the Master,

but there'll be
no more sexuality in me.

I'll know the true smile
of the soul,

not from outside...

But from inside.

Like a pain
that's always deserved.

It's not a matter of experience,
but of total disgust, total hatred,

and not of morality or dignity.

The Father and Mother
must fuck to death over my body.

Then Lucifer will die,

and we'll see...

We'll see who's weariest,

him...

or me.

Earth and sex are in us.

Outside there are only stars.

Wanting isn't expanding
by force.

It's recoiling into oneself...

from level to level, for eternity.

You don't need a mouthhole
to eat with...

and an asshole
to swallow infinity.

Your ass must go in your head,

and so descend to ass level,

then go left...

or right, to rise higher.

God is a vampire
who suffered me in Him

because I suffered
and He didn't,

and He profited from my pain.

Mary is a body
fallen from a soul.

I am a soul
imprisoned by a body.

My soul makes me sick at heart,
and it's my cunt.

I'm a woman...

though I don't beget my man
through my cunt.

I am joy.

I am she who is joy,
and need no longer fight it,

or be tempted,

but to gain an added joy.

I am not resigned.
Resignation is sad.

How can one be resigned
to God's will?

Are we resigned
to being loved?

This seemed clear to me.

Too clear.

AT THAT TIME

AT THAT TIME

Oh, Mary, what a strange road
I had to take to reach you.

Now what's wrong?

Here they are!

Do you believe it now?

Will he call Joseph "Dad"?

What'll you do?

Tell him later
that he's not his father?

That's life.

I came about the station.

We'll talk about it.

I figured it out.
I can pay it back in 2 years.

- Sure!
- No!

Dad! Joseph!

Thanks, Mary.

For every woman.

"How did He look?
What was He like?

"There are no looks in love,
no outward seeming,

"no likeness.

"Only our hearts
will tremble in the light.

"I can't describe Him
as He stood there,

"but I can tell you how
the women looked on seeing Him."

Come with me.

Come with me.

- What's your name?
- Fabian.

Now your name's Peter.

- And what's your name?
- Florent.

Now your name's James.

What's my name?

Where's my coffee?
I'm late.

Where's my coffee?
Where's my coffee?

Juniors'd
better be nice this morning.

Or we won't play whale tonight.

Please, Mom, let's play whale!

What's that called?

The hedgehog, or the lawn.

What's that called?

Bells.

What's that called?

Loaves, bread.

He's too old
to see you naked now.

"Quia respexit," Joseph.

Some day, you know,

he who is your father
may forget you.

Then you'll regret
I'm not around.

Look at me!

I am who he is.

Quit clowning! Get in!

I must tend
to my Father's affairs.

By God, we'll see about that!

Stop it!

He'll be back.

When?

At Easter,

or Trinity Sunday.

Madam!

Hey, Madam!

What is it?

Nothing. Hail, Mary!

I am of the Virgin,

and I didn't want this being.

I only left my imprint
on the soul that helped me.

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