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1
00:00:09,241 --> 00:00:12,620
♪♪
2
00:00:12,620 --> 00:00:16,000
Randy:
♪ Goin' down to Tegridy Farms,
gonna have myself a time ♪
3
00:00:16,000 --> 00:00:18,103
♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪
4
00:00:18,103 --> 00:00:20,068
♪ Humble folks
without temptation ♪
5
00:00:20,068 --> 00:00:23,206
♪ Goin' down to Tegridy Farms,
gonna leave my woes behind ♪
6
00:00:23,206 --> 00:00:25,241
♪ There's ample parking
day or night ♪
7
00:00:25,241 --> 00:00:26,931
♪ People spouting,
"Howdy, neighbor" ♪
8
00:00:26,931 --> 00:00:28,517
♪ I'm headin' on down
to Tegridy Farms ♪
9
00:00:28,517 --> 00:00:30,413
♪ Gonna see if I can't unwind ♪
10
00:00:30,413 --> 00:00:32,206
Towelie: I got some weed,
and...
11
00:00:32,206 --> 00:00:33,931
I don't know what's going on.
12
00:00:33,931 --> 00:00:35,827
Randy: ♪ So come on down
to Tegridy Farms ♪
13
00:00:35,827 --> 00:00:37,896
♪ And meet some friends
of mine ♪
14
00:00:40,344 --> 00:00:43,000
♪ Happy 300 to us ♪
15
00:00:43,000 --> 00:00:45,931
♪ Happy 300 to us ♪
16
00:00:45,931 --> 00:00:49,068
♪ Happy 300,
Tegridy Farms ♪
17
00:00:49,068 --> 00:00:50,620
Ugh!
Ugh!Ugh!
18
00:00:50,620 --> 00:00:54,448
♪ Happy three hundred
thousand dollars ♪
19
00:00:54,448 --> 00:00:55,965
Can you believe it, gang?
20
00:00:55,965 --> 00:00:59,586
We've broken $300,000
selling weed.
21
00:01:01,241 --> 00:01:03,172
Not to be a dick,
22
00:01:03,172 --> 00:01:07,206
but I remember back when
you, Sharon, and you, Shelley,
23
00:01:07,206 --> 00:01:11,034
said buying a pot farm
was a "stupid" idea.
24
00:01:11,034 --> 00:01:13,241
Now we're living the dream.
25
00:01:13,241 --> 00:01:16,344
You'reliving the dream.
This is yourdream.
26
00:01:18,206 --> 00:01:21,103
You know,
[scoffs] is it me
27
00:01:21,103 --> 00:01:25,172
or are people starting to not be
that stoked on Tegridy Farms?
28
00:01:27,103 --> 00:01:31,000
Are you guys still pissed off
about the China thing?
29
00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:33,655
You may not like that
I do business with China,
30
00:01:33,655 --> 00:01:36,620
but personally, I think you guys
having a problem with China
31
00:01:36,620 --> 00:01:37,965
is racist.
32
00:01:37,965 --> 00:01:40,172
Now come on!
Let's celebrate 300!
33
00:01:40,172 --> 00:01:41,448
Who wants shots?
34
00:01:41,448 --> 00:01:42,620
Shots?
35
00:01:42,620 --> 00:01:44,931
No shots!
No shots!
36
00:01:44,931 --> 00:01:47,068
Eric, you have
to be a big boy.
37
00:01:47,068 --> 00:01:49,137
Big boys get a toy
from the toy chest.
38
00:01:49,137 --> 00:01:52,586
No, no, no, no, no!
[ Screeching ]
39
00:01:52,586 --> 00:01:54,896
Eric, It's just a little prick.[ Laughs ]
40
00:01:54,896 --> 00:01:56,655
No, no, no!
Nooooo!
41
00:01:56,655 --> 00:01:57,965
Good boy, Eric!
42
00:01:57,965 --> 00:02:00,241
[ Squealing ]
43
00:02:00,241 --> 00:02:01,586
[ Glass shatters ]
44
00:02:01,586 --> 00:02:03,655
[ Cartman squealing ]
45
00:02:05,137 --> 00:02:07,241
Our school now has
a very strict policy
46
00:02:07,241 --> 00:02:09,275
when it comes
to immunizations.
47
00:02:09,275 --> 00:02:12,655
Everyonehas to follow protocol
or it puts everyoneat risk.
48
00:02:12,655 --> 00:02:15,586
I'm sorry, PC Principal.
It's just that...
49
00:02:15,586 --> 00:02:18,655
my little Eric really
doesn't like shots.
50
00:02:18,655 --> 00:02:21,275
Well, Eric, nobody likes shots.
They're just a fact of life.
51
00:02:21,275 --> 00:02:22,896
No, no.
You don't understand.
52
00:02:22,896 --> 00:02:24,862
I've taken him to the doctor
every Friday
53
00:02:24,862 --> 00:02:26,068
for the past four years.
54
00:02:26,068 --> 00:02:27,482
They try to
give him his shot,
55
00:02:27,482 --> 00:02:29,413
but he gets scared
and runs around,
56
00:02:29,413 --> 00:02:31,241
and he squeals
like a little pig.
57
00:02:31,241 --> 00:02:32,896
The doctors try
to catch him,
58
00:02:32,896 --> 00:02:35,275
but Eric greases himself up
so they can't.
59
00:02:35,275 --> 00:02:37,103
I'm sorry,
but my hands are tied here.
60
00:02:37,103 --> 00:02:38,379
If Eric isn't immunized,
61
00:02:38,379 --> 00:02:40,000
then he cannot go
to this school.
62
00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:43,034
[ Sobbing ] Please!
I've tried everything!
63
00:02:43,034 --> 00:02:45,000
You haveto let Eric
go to school.
64
00:02:45,000 --> 00:02:47,068
I work all day,
and without school,
65
00:02:47,068 --> 00:02:50,103
he'll just --
he'll just have nothing!
66
00:02:50,103 --> 00:02:52,448
What do you think's gonna
be different next time you try?
67
00:02:52,448 --> 00:02:55,241
If -- If you could
offer Eric something.
68
00:02:55,241 --> 00:02:57,275
Sometimes when Eric
is behaving this way,
69
00:02:57,275 --> 00:02:59,965
I think of a gift
or a treat of some kind.
70
00:02:59,965 --> 00:03:01,344
Oh, that's a good idea.
71
00:03:01,344 --> 00:03:02,827
Like, what are
you thinking?
72
00:03:02,827 --> 00:03:04,275
I don't know!
73
00:03:04,275 --> 00:03:06,137
Like maybe
exclusive use
74
00:03:06,137 --> 00:03:08,344
of the tetherball pole at recess
for the next two months?
75
00:03:08,344 --> 00:03:11,068
Ooh, would that
be possible?
76
00:03:11,068 --> 00:03:13,310
What I care most about is
the safety of the students,
77
00:03:13,310 --> 00:03:15,793
so if you'll take your shots,
then I'll agree.
78
00:03:15,793 --> 00:03:19,310
Sweet.But, Eric, you really have to do
it this time, okay?
79
00:03:19,310 --> 00:03:21,793
When we're at the doctors,
you can't change your mind.
80
00:03:21,793 --> 00:03:23,379
I won't change my mind.
81
00:03:23,379 --> 00:03:25,482
[ Indistinct conversations ]
82
00:03:25,482 --> 00:03:27,137
[ Cartman squeals in distance ]
83
00:03:27,137 --> 00:03:29,000
[ Crashing, glass shatters ]
84
00:03:29,000 --> 00:03:32,551
[ Squealing continues ]
85
00:03:32,551 --> 00:03:33,862
[ Crashing, shattering ]
86
00:03:33,862 --> 00:03:35,344
Eric, it's okay!
87
00:03:35,344 --> 00:03:38,482
[ Squealing continues ]
88
00:03:38,482 --> 00:03:39,931
[ Glass shatters ]
89
00:03:39,931 --> 00:03:41,517
[ Clattering ]
90
00:03:41,517 --> 00:03:44,000
I'm sorry but I have
a lot of other patients to see.
91
00:03:44,000 --> 00:03:46,172
We'll just have to try again
next week.
92
00:03:46,172 --> 00:03:49,137
Come on, Eric.
We're going home.
93
00:03:49,137 --> 00:03:50,275
We're going home?
You promise?
94
00:03:50,275 --> 00:03:52,344
Let's go!
Get in the car!
95
00:03:52,344 --> 00:03:54,758
Wait, can I get a toy
from the toy chest?
96
00:03:54,758 --> 00:03:56,689
One toy, Eric!
97
00:03:56,689 --> 00:03:58,172
Cool!
98
00:03:58,172 --> 00:04:00,896
[ Toys rattle ]
99
00:04:00,896 --> 00:04:03,413
[ Indistinct conversations ]
100
00:04:03,413 --> 00:04:05,275
[ Siren chirps ]
101
00:04:05,275 --> 00:04:07,758
[ Marching band plays ]
102
00:04:07,758 --> 00:04:09,448
[ Parade music plays ]
103
00:04:09,448 --> 00:04:10,896
Yeah!
104
00:04:10,896 --> 00:04:12,793
300!
105
00:04:12,793 --> 00:04:15,068
Tegridy Farms!
Hello, South Park!
106
00:04:15,068 --> 00:04:16,551
Thanks for making Tegridy
107
00:04:16,551 --> 00:04:19,206
the most profitable farm
in Colorado!
108
00:04:19,206 --> 00:04:21,517
We couldn't have done it
without you, so here!
109
00:04:21,517 --> 00:04:23,172
Here's some beads![ Red Rockers' "China" plays ]
110
00:04:23,172 --> 00:04:25,275
Here you go!
Beads for everybody!
111
00:04:25,275 --> 00:04:28,206
I've got $300,000!
112
00:04:28,206 --> 00:04:34,034
♪ China, China!♪
113
00:04:34,034 --> 00:04:37,241
♪ Da-da-ya-ya history!♪
114
00:04:37,241 --> 00:04:40,172
♪ It was la la la China! ♪
115
00:04:40,172 --> 00:04:44,724
[ Sirens chirp ]♪ China, China!♪
116
00:04:44,724 --> 00:04:46,793
Alright, China!
117
00:04:46,793 --> 00:04:49,034
Butters:
So, then I guess the school said
Eric can't come here no more
118
00:04:49,034 --> 00:04:50,448
and so he's been,
like, kicked out.
119
00:04:50,448 --> 00:04:52,896
Cartman can't go
to this school anymore?
120
00:04:52,896 --> 00:04:54,379
Yeah, he was actually kind of
upset about it
121
00:04:54,379 --> 00:04:56,241
because he said on the phone
that he has to do
122
00:04:56,241 --> 00:04:57,896
homeschooling
with this really mean teacher.
123
00:04:57,896 --> 00:05:00,275
Oh, my God. I don't know
how long this will last,
124
00:05:00,275 --> 00:05:01,931
but I'm gonna savor
every minute.
125
00:05:01,931 --> 00:05:03,965
Hey, guys!
I'm back in school!
126
00:05:03,965 --> 00:05:05,413
Everything worked out.
127
00:05:05,413 --> 00:05:06,655
I'm allowed back,
and it's all good!
128
00:05:06,655 --> 00:05:08,000
You got your shots?
129
00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:09,965
No, I don't have
to get my shots ever!
130
00:05:09,965 --> 00:05:11,310
And they can't
do anything about it.
131
00:05:11,310 --> 00:05:13,413
Because
I'm a consciousness objector.
132
00:05:13,413 --> 00:05:15,275
A conscientious objector?
133
00:05:15,275 --> 00:05:17,344
Yeah, I told the school,
I said, look you guys,
134
00:05:17,344 --> 00:05:19,413
I happen to have...
"religious, moral,
135
00:05:19,413 --> 00:05:21,275
or philosophical
convictions."
136
00:05:21,275 --> 00:05:23,310
And -- And I said I believe
that "health and disease
137
00:05:23,310 --> 00:05:24,931
should not be controlled
by vaccination."
138
00:05:24,931 --> 00:05:26,965
Those are mybeliefs.
139
00:05:26,965 --> 00:05:28,793
And besides, I don't want
to risk immunizations
140
00:05:28,793 --> 00:05:30,655
making me artistic.
[ Sniffles ]
141
00:05:30,655 --> 00:05:32,620
Dude, Cartman, don't you know
that if you don't get immunized
142
00:05:32,620 --> 00:05:34,137
you actually put people
at risk who --One second! One second!
143
00:05:34,137 --> 00:05:36,068
[ Sniffles ] Sorry.
One second, gotta sneeze.
144
00:05:36,068 --> 00:05:37,448
Oh, never mind.
Never mind.
145
00:05:37,448 --> 00:05:38,862
I'm sorry.
What were you saying?
146
00:05:38,862 --> 00:05:40,413
I'm saying that
we all had to get shots
147
00:05:40,413 --> 00:05:41,448
and, actually,
if just one person doesn't --
148
00:05:41,448 --> 00:05:42,827
[ Sneezes ]
149
00:05:42,827 --> 00:05:43,758
Oh!
150
00:05:43,758 --> 00:05:44,896
Snot web.
151
00:05:44,896 --> 00:05:46,413
I'll be right back,
you guys.
152
00:05:46,413 --> 00:05:47,655
Can somebody get me
a paper towel?
153
00:05:47,655 --> 00:05:49,103
I got a snot web here.
154
00:05:49,103 --> 00:05:51,137
Consciousness objector
coming through.
155
00:05:51,137 --> 00:05:54,655
[ Indistinct shouting ]
156
00:05:54,655 --> 00:05:56,172
Alright, everyone.
Listen up.
157
00:05:56,172 --> 00:05:57,689
I understand your frustration,
158
00:05:57,689 --> 00:06:00,206
but a government organization
like a school
159
00:06:00,206 --> 00:06:03,931
cannot impose its will
on a conscientious objector.
160
00:06:03,931 --> 00:06:06,655
It's not safe for our kids
to be in this school!
161
00:06:06,655 --> 00:06:09,206
You do understand that up
to 5% of kids with vaccines
162
00:06:09,206 --> 00:06:10,724
can still be at risk.
163
00:06:10,724 --> 00:06:13,034
Everyone has to do it,
or it doesn't matter!
164
00:06:13,034 --> 00:06:15,655
Yeah, I don't quite see
how it's fair that
165
00:06:15,655 --> 00:06:18,000
allthe rest of our community
agrees to this.
166
00:06:18,000 --> 00:06:20,655
Why does onefamily
get to have a problem with it?
167
00:06:20,655 --> 00:06:22,137
I'm sorry.
168
00:06:22,137 --> 00:06:24,413
It's just my strong,
personal belief that
169
00:06:24,413 --> 00:06:25,931
"among other things,
170
00:06:25,931 --> 00:06:27,931
vaccines contain
harmful ingredients.
171
00:06:27,931 --> 00:06:30,827
Formaldehyde, aluminum
and even Mercury."
172
00:06:30,827 --> 00:06:33,758
Aw, come on, Mrs. Cartman,
all major medical organizations
173
00:06:33,758 --> 00:06:35,379
state that vaccines
are safe!
174
00:06:35,379 --> 00:06:38,896
The CDC, the FDA, UNICEF,
and the US Department of Health!
175
00:06:38,896 --> 00:06:41,103
Yes, yes,
I know but...
176
00:06:41,103 --> 00:06:45,241
"we can't even risk
a 0.1% chance of vaccinations
177
00:06:45,241 --> 00:06:47,586
making our children
artistic."
178
00:06:47,586 --> 00:06:48,896
Well, that's true.
179
00:06:48,896 --> 00:06:50,310
There are enough artists
in the world.
180
00:06:50,310 --> 00:06:52,068
Look, I don't know
what kind of mother
181
00:06:52,068 --> 00:06:53,724
wouldn't vaccinate
their child,
182
00:06:53,724 --> 00:06:55,931
but it's putting everyone
in danger, and that's why --
183
00:06:55,931 --> 00:06:58,827
Then you try to catch him!
You try it!
184
00:06:58,827 --> 00:07:00,724
Don't you people
criticize me
185
00:07:00,724 --> 00:07:02,896
until you've taken Eric
to the doctor,
186
00:07:02,896 --> 00:07:04,896
and you've tried
to hold him down!
187
00:07:04,896 --> 00:07:06,448
I'm a good mother!
188
00:07:06,448 --> 00:07:11,241
Don't you dare question
if I care about my child!
189
00:07:11,241 --> 00:07:12,965
Oh, shit.
190
00:07:12,965 --> 00:07:14,482
O-Of course you care.
191
00:07:14,482 --> 00:07:16,965
Nobody likes seeing
their child in pain.
192
00:07:16,965 --> 00:07:19,620
Maybe -- Maybe you should
just let us take care
193
00:07:19,620 --> 00:07:22,551
of getting Eric
his shots.
194
00:07:22,551 --> 00:07:27,137
You don't understand
how hard it is.
195
00:07:27,137 --> 00:07:28,620
We'll find a way
to make it
196
00:07:28,620 --> 00:07:32,275
completely painless
for him, okay?
197
00:07:32,275 --> 00:07:34,137
[ Snoring ]
198
00:07:43,413 --> 00:07:44,620
[ Keys jangle ]
199
00:07:44,620 --> 00:07:46,551
[ Door creaks ]
200
00:08:00,551 --> 00:08:02,310
Alright, alright.
Bring him in!
201
00:08:05,448 --> 00:08:07,068
The little boy's room
is upstairs.
202
00:08:07,068 --> 00:08:09,206
Oh, I don't know
if I can go through with this.
203
00:08:09,206 --> 00:08:11,965
My little Eric is going
to be so mad at me!
204
00:08:11,965 --> 00:08:13,310
Look, by the time
he knows what's happened,
205
00:08:13,310 --> 00:08:14,517
it'll already be over.
206
00:08:14,517 --> 00:08:16,344
Did you bring
his boo-boo present?
207
00:08:16,344 --> 00:08:18,206
Yeah, yeah, come on.
Thomas and Laura.
208
00:08:22,482 --> 00:08:24,000
Okay? See?
We got the present.
209
00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:25,482
Everything's
gonna be fine.
210
00:08:25,482 --> 00:08:27,137
[ Snoring ]
211
00:08:36,793 --> 00:08:38,517
[ Snoring continues ]
212
00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:40,965
Hey, what's going on?
213
00:08:40,965 --> 00:08:42,000
[ Squeals ]
214
00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:44,034
No, no! Nooo!
215
00:08:44,034 --> 00:08:45,655
Oh! It'll just
be for a second!
216
00:08:45,655 --> 00:08:47,344
Oh, Jesus!
217
00:08:47,344 --> 00:08:49,172
[ Cartman squeals ]
218
00:08:49,172 --> 00:08:51,862
Eric, there's a big treat
for you if you stay still!
219
00:08:51,862 --> 00:08:53,310
[ Squealing continues ]Catch him!
220
00:08:53,310 --> 00:08:54,862
[ Squealing ]Butter's Dad: Thomas! Linda!
221
00:08:54,862 --> 00:08:56,551
Y-You gotta get him!
222
00:08:56,551 --> 00:08:58,448
[ Squealing continues ]
223
00:08:58,448 --> 00:09:00,724
[ Snorts ]
224
00:09:00,724 --> 00:09:02,620
[ Squealing resumes ]
225
00:09:07,724 --> 00:09:09,620
[ Squealing continues ]
226
00:09:10,482 --> 00:09:13,620
Eric! Oh!
227
00:09:15,034 --> 00:09:16,793
Well, what do we do now?
228
00:09:16,793 --> 00:09:19,758
I think the only way
we're gonna get Eric immunized
229
00:09:19,758 --> 00:09:22,034
is by bringing
in an expert.
230
00:09:22,034 --> 00:09:25,172
[ Western music plays ]
231
00:09:25,172 --> 00:09:27,689
[ Telephone rings ]
232
00:09:30,241 --> 00:09:34,689
This is Big Mesquite Murph.
How can I help you?
233
00:09:34,689 --> 00:09:39,379
You say you got yourself
a conscientious objector?
234
00:09:39,379 --> 00:09:41,206
Well, you just sit tight.
235
00:09:41,206 --> 00:09:43,103
There aren't never no hog
236
00:09:43,103 --> 00:09:46,000
that Big Mesquite Murph
couldn't catch.
237
00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:48,206
♪♪
238
00:09:50,103 --> 00:09:53,482
♪♪
239
00:09:53,482 --> 00:09:56,965
How many thousand dollars has
Tegridy Farms made selling weed?
240
00:09:56,965 --> 00:09:59,137
$300,000!
241
00:09:59,137 --> 00:10:01,103
It's a 300-palooza!
242
00:10:01,103 --> 00:10:03,103
Come on down
and see what we've got!
243
00:10:03,103 --> 00:10:04,034
Deep voice: What have we got?
244
00:10:04,034 --> 00:10:06,551
We've got $300,000!
245
00:10:06,551 --> 00:10:10,448
Just selling' all
this [echoing] weed!
246
00:10:10,448 --> 00:10:12,103
And this month,
we're celebrating
247
00:10:12,103 --> 00:10:14,172
all our new customers in China!
248
00:10:14,172 --> 00:10:17,172
[ Reggae music plays ]
249
00:10:17,172 --> 00:10:19,655
We're celebrating with
new T-shirts!
250
00:10:19,655 --> 00:10:23,275
"Tegridy Farms made $300,000
and all I got was high."
251
00:10:23,275 --> 00:10:25,137
Get yours for just ten bucks!
252
00:10:25,137 --> 00:10:26,793
We couldn't have
done it without you!
253
00:10:26,793 --> 00:10:29,862
Remember!
That's $300,000!
254
00:10:29,862 --> 00:10:31,137
[ Remote clicks ]
255
00:10:31,137 --> 00:10:32,862
Well...
what'd you think, guys?
256
00:10:32,862 --> 00:10:35,000
How much did you spend
making that commercial?
257
00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:37,068
Who cares, Sharon?
Business is up.
258
00:10:37,068 --> 00:10:40,482
Nobody cares about
your stupid $300,000!
259
00:10:40,482 --> 00:10:41,896
We've become
the kind of business
260
00:10:41,896 --> 00:10:44,034
that we moved out here
to get away from!
261
00:10:44,034 --> 00:10:46,206
You know why
the Chinese buy our weed?!
262
00:10:46,206 --> 00:10:48,482
It's to plant
on their student protesters
263
00:10:48,482 --> 00:10:50,379
so they can
put them in jail!
264
00:10:50,379 --> 00:10:52,379
Yeah, we make money
either way.
265
00:10:52,379 --> 00:10:55,034
You don't care
how anyone else feels!
266
00:10:55,034 --> 00:10:57,172
We bought this farm
together, Randy!
267
00:10:57,172 --> 00:11:01,379
Or did you forget that?I hatemarijuana!
268
00:11:01,379 --> 00:11:04,068
[ Gasps ] Shelley!I hate marijuana,too.
269
00:11:04,068 --> 00:11:06,172
[ Gasps ] Stan!
270
00:11:11,241 --> 00:11:13,758
Oh, Eric, I...
271
00:11:13,758 --> 00:11:15,827
wasn't sure
if you'd be up yet.
272
00:11:15,827 --> 00:11:17,275
[ Chuckles nervously ]
273
00:11:19,965 --> 00:11:22,931
Eric, you know I only
want what's best
274
00:11:22,931 --> 00:11:24,448
for my little snookums.
275
00:11:24,448 --> 00:11:27,724
You read me a bedtime story.
You tucked me in.
276
00:11:27,724 --> 00:11:29,344
And then you let half the town
into my room
277
00:11:29,344 --> 00:11:31,068
to try and give me a shot
against my will.
278
00:11:31,068 --> 00:11:33,551
It was supposed
to make it easier on you,
279
00:11:33,551 --> 00:11:36,137
and th-th-they didn't
catch you anyway.
280
00:11:36,137 --> 00:11:39,206
This is goodbye, Mom.
I can't live with you anymore.
281
00:11:39,206 --> 00:11:41,172
Eric, please!
282
00:11:41,172 --> 00:11:43,241
You don't know how hard it is
to be a parent!
283
00:11:43,241 --> 00:11:45,620
Sometimes we don't know
the right thing to do!
284
00:11:45,620 --> 00:11:47,034
So you go along
with society
285
00:11:47,034 --> 00:11:48,379
and try to force
immunizations on me
286
00:11:48,379 --> 00:11:50,206
even knowing
the health risks?
287
00:11:50,206 --> 00:11:52,448
What if immunizations made my
friend Timmy the way he is?
288
00:11:52,448 --> 00:11:53,896
What if they made Jimmy
the way he is?
289
00:11:53,896 --> 00:11:55,931
What if they made Token
the way he is?
290
00:11:55,931 --> 00:11:58,034
Eric, when I was
at the store, I got you
291
00:11:58,034 --> 00:11:59,931
some Little Debbie Cream Pies
and --
292
00:11:59,931 --> 00:12:01,310
That isn't gonna work
this time, Mom!
293
00:12:01,310 --> 00:12:04,758
I don't want
to be around you anymore!
294
00:12:04,758 --> 00:12:06,241
So I don't know where
you're gonna stay,
295
00:12:06,241 --> 00:12:07,620
but you'll just have
to figure it out.
296
00:12:07,620 --> 00:12:09,275
I've already packed
all your things.
297
00:12:09,275 --> 00:12:12,310
Sweetie, you can't live
on your own.
298
00:12:12,310 --> 00:12:14,344
You should've thought about that
before you made this house
299
00:12:14,344 --> 00:12:16,344
a nightmare for me.
Goodbye, mother.
300
00:12:24,000 --> 00:12:27,137
[ Country music plays ]
301
00:12:27,137 --> 00:12:30,172
Alright, youngin,
we can do this the easy way
302
00:12:30,172 --> 00:12:32,448
or we can do it hard.
303
00:12:32,448 --> 00:12:35,931
♪♪
304
00:12:35,931 --> 00:12:38,137
[ Squealing, snorting ]
305
00:12:38,137 --> 00:12:40,758
-Yeeeeeeee-haw!
-[ Squealing continues ]
306
00:12:40,758 --> 00:12:42,689
-Soooiee!
-[ Squealing continues ]
307
00:12:45,137 --> 00:12:54,620
♪♪
308
00:12:54,620 --> 00:12:56,862
Well? What happened.
309
00:12:56,862 --> 00:13:00,068
[ Slurring ] I ain't never seen
no hog like that...
310
00:13:00,068 --> 00:13:03,379
It's like it could run
two places at once.
311
00:13:03,379 --> 00:13:05,551
You said
you could catch him!
312
00:13:05,551 --> 00:13:07,000
I didcatch 'im!
313
00:13:07,000 --> 00:13:09,103
I got him locked in a pen!
314
00:13:09,103 --> 00:13:11,068
It's just that every time
I bring out that needle,
315
00:13:11,068 --> 00:13:13,068
he becomes
like a hog tornado,
316
00:13:13,068 --> 00:13:14,965
but I'll get him!
Yeah?
317
00:13:14,965 --> 00:13:16,862
Or maybe you just believe
a little bit
318
00:13:16,862 --> 00:13:19,655
that vaccinations shouldn't be
mandated for school attendance
319
00:13:19,655 --> 00:13:22,344
due to possible
still-unknown side effects.
320
00:13:22,344 --> 00:13:25,413
Don't you question me.
If anyone believes
321
00:13:25,413 --> 00:13:28,758
that the most common side effect
of vaccines -- anaphylaxis --
322
00:13:28,758 --> 00:13:31,206
occurs in only one per several
hundred thousand
323
00:13:31,206 --> 00:13:32,827
to one per million vaccinations,
324
00:13:32,827 --> 00:13:35,034
it's Big Mesquite Murph.
325
00:13:35,034 --> 00:13:37,517
Now this hog you got here,
he's contained,
326
00:13:37,517 --> 00:13:40,241
but now I need help gettin' him
his shots.
327
00:13:40,241 --> 00:13:42,068
The only way
we're gonna get him,
328
00:13:42,068 --> 00:13:44,413
is we gotta build a big
enclosed pen
329
00:13:44,413 --> 00:13:46,413
'bout 100 feet in diameter.
330
00:13:46,413 --> 00:13:50,034
I'm also gonna need the best
wranglers flown in from Wichita.
331
00:13:50,034 --> 00:13:54,206
And I'm gonna need some loud
music and some barbecue.
332
00:13:54,206 --> 00:13:56,586
Barbecue?
333
00:13:56,586 --> 00:14:00,310
[ Doorbell rings ]
334
00:14:00,310 --> 00:14:02,137
Mrs. Cartman?
335
00:14:02,137 --> 00:14:03,448
Hello, Randy...
336
00:14:03,448 --> 00:14:06,103
I'm...sorry to trouble you,
but...
337
00:14:06,103 --> 00:14:07,793
I don't know where to turn.
338
00:14:07,793 --> 00:14:09,724
I was hoping maybe...
339
00:14:09,724 --> 00:14:11,758
I could buy some ganja.
340
00:14:11,758 --> 00:14:13,482
Whoa, whoa, what's going on?
341
00:14:13,482 --> 00:14:15,724
My son h-hates me.
342
00:14:15,724 --> 00:14:17,931
The whole town h-hates me.
343
00:14:17,931 --> 00:14:20,137
Nobody thinks I'm a good mom,
344
00:14:20,137 --> 00:14:22,206
and I don't know
if I am anymore!
345
00:14:22,206 --> 00:14:23,586
Ok, ok, come on...
346
00:14:23,586 --> 00:14:26,586
let's get you inside
and get you some weed.
347
00:14:26,586 --> 00:14:28,965
It all just happened gradually,
you know?
348
00:14:28,965 --> 00:14:31,379
[ Inhales ]
I don't know why
349
00:14:31,379 --> 00:14:33,310
but it's like everyone's
against me.
350
00:14:33,310 --> 00:14:35,965
Even my own son.
[ Exhales ]
351
00:14:35,965 --> 00:14:37,896
Believe me, I know
how that feels.
352
00:14:37,896 --> 00:14:39,448
[ Inhales ]
353
00:14:39,448 --> 00:14:41,103
You try to do what's best
for your family
354
00:14:41,103 --> 00:14:42,758
and all you do
is get shit on.
355
00:14:42,758 --> 00:14:45,655
I know immunizations
are probably for the best...
356
00:14:45,655 --> 00:14:48,275
[ Inhales ] ...but then you read
some of this stuff
357
00:14:48,275 --> 00:14:50,413
on the Internet,
and I don't know.
358
00:14:50,413 --> 00:14:52,586
It's scary.
[ Exhales ]
359
00:14:52,586 --> 00:14:54,275
That's just it.
[ Inhales ]
360
00:14:54,275 --> 00:14:56,068
When it comes to families,
we just have to do
361
00:14:56,068 --> 00:14:59,448
what wethink is best.It doesn't matter.
362
00:14:59,448 --> 00:15:01,931
They're having an all-county
mandated immunization
363
00:15:01,931 --> 00:15:03,310
round up tonight.
364
00:15:03,310 --> 00:15:05,655
Any child not immunized
is about to be.
365
00:15:05,655 --> 00:15:07,517
All-county immunization
round up?
366
00:15:07,517 --> 00:15:09,862
What's that?[ Indistinct chatter ]
367
00:15:09,862 --> 00:15:11,689
ANNOUNCER:
Good evenin', everybody,
368
00:15:11,689 --> 00:15:15,551
and welcome to the CDC
Child Immunization challenge.
369
00:15:15,551 --> 00:15:17,724
This here special event
is sponsored by
370
00:15:17,724 --> 00:15:20,793
Voices for Vaccines
and also by Chevy.
371
00:15:20,793 --> 00:15:23,793
So with all that all out the
way, let's get to some action!
372
00:15:23,793 --> 00:15:29,344
[ Cheers and applause ]
373
00:15:29,344 --> 00:15:32,000
First up, we have little
Danny Ray Johnston
374
00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:33,724
out of Bailey, Colorada.
375
00:15:33,724 --> 00:15:36,551
He has not been immunized
since kindergarten.
376
00:15:36,551 --> 00:15:39,034
He says he just don't like
needles.
377
00:15:39,034 --> 00:15:40,344
[ Whistle blows ]
378
00:15:40,344 --> 00:15:45,620
[ Cheers and applause ]
379
00:15:45,620 --> 00:15:47,379
No! Noooooo!
380
00:15:47,379 --> 00:15:49,379
[ Screaming ]
-And there they go!
381
00:15:49,379 --> 00:15:51,379
[ Screaming continues ][ Banjo music plays ]
382
00:15:51,379 --> 00:15:53,379
[ Cheers and applause ]
383
00:15:53,379 --> 00:15:55,827
No! Noooo! [ Screams ]
384
00:15:55,827 --> 00:15:58,000
[ Crowd ohh's ]
385
00:15:58,000 --> 00:16:01,379
[ Screaming continues ]
386
00:16:01,379 --> 00:16:05,586
[ Gate rattling ]
387
00:16:05,586 --> 00:16:10,724
[ Screaming continues ]
388
00:16:10,724 --> 00:16:12,206
Ah! [ Shouts ]
389
00:16:12,206 --> 00:16:14,068
[ Screaming continues ]
390
00:16:14,068 --> 00:16:15,931
Nooo!
391
00:16:15,931 --> 00:16:20,068
[ Crying ][ Cheers and applause ]
392
00:16:20,068 --> 00:16:22,275
He stuck him
in the left buttocks!
393
00:16:22,275 --> 00:16:24,724
That is a 8.7 score,
right there.
394
00:16:24,724 --> 00:16:28,068
[ Cheers and applause ][ Gate rattling ]
395
00:16:28,068 --> 00:16:31,137
Alright let's hear it
for little Danny Ray, folks.[ Crying ]
396
00:16:31,137 --> 00:16:33,965
He's a little worse for wear
but now he can pick himself up
397
00:16:33,965 --> 00:16:35,758
a nice little toy
from the toy chest.
398
00:16:35,758 --> 00:16:37,758
[ Banging ] Jesus...
399
00:16:37,758 --> 00:16:39,137
I've got to get out of here!
400
00:16:41,344 --> 00:16:43,482
[ Crickets chirping ]
401
00:16:43,482 --> 00:16:45,034
[ Crying ] It's just --
It's like --
402
00:16:45,034 --> 00:16:46,586
Can't people see
I'm trying to do
403
00:16:46,586 --> 00:16:48,275
what's best
for my family?!
404
00:16:48,275 --> 00:16:50,827
I'm trying to provide for them
by running a business!
405
00:16:50,827 --> 00:16:53,172
I'm sorry
if I make mistakes!
406
00:16:53,172 --> 00:16:54,896
I know, Randy.
407
00:16:54,896 --> 00:16:56,896
Other parents expect me
to deal with Eric and --
408
00:16:56,896 --> 00:16:58,724
And I get it
from both sides
409
00:16:58,724 --> 00:17:01,758
because my family's
pissed off at me, too!
410
00:17:01,758 --> 00:17:04,034
I understand.No, you don't!
411
00:17:04,034 --> 00:17:06,310
Yes, I do.
No, you don't!
412
00:17:06,310 --> 00:17:07,758
[ Garbled ]
Nobody understands.
413
00:17:07,758 --> 00:17:13,034
Randy, we all try to do
the best for our family.
414
00:17:13,034 --> 00:17:14,896
And sometimes...
415
00:17:14,896 --> 00:17:17,068
when we're afraid
of being judged,
416
00:17:17,068 --> 00:17:19,482
we can push
our family away.
417
00:17:19,482 --> 00:17:22,206
Yeah, it's like everybody's
doing business with China.
418
00:17:22,206 --> 00:17:23,827
Just, like, get over it.
419
00:17:23,827 --> 00:17:26,620
You should just feel lucky
that you have a partner
420
00:17:26,620 --> 00:17:29,620
in doing what's right
for your family.
Yeah...
421
00:17:29,620 --> 00:17:32,448
I'm afraid I haven't been very
kind to that partner lately.
422
00:17:32,448 --> 00:17:34,862
I think maybe it's time
for an apology.
423
00:17:34,862 --> 00:17:36,758
Thanks for the talk,
Randy,
424
00:17:36,758 --> 00:17:39,413
andfor the weed.Where you going?
425
00:17:39,413 --> 00:17:42,896
I'm going to do the only thing
I know how to do.
426
00:17:42,896 --> 00:17:44,724
Be a mom.
427
00:17:44,724 --> 00:17:46,586
[ Screaming ] Nooo!
428
00:17:46,586 --> 00:17:48,344
[ Screaming continues ]
429
00:17:48,344 --> 00:17:50,896
ANNOUNCER: Alright, and that is
Dr. Chet Molwinns
430
00:17:50,896 --> 00:17:53,724
that just gave that girl
her DTAP booster
431
00:17:53,724 --> 00:17:56,241
and her HPV vaccination.
432
00:17:56,241 --> 00:17:58,068
That is for genital warts.
433
00:17:58,068 --> 00:18:00,000
Way to go, Chet.[ Cheers and applause ]
434
00:18:00,000 --> 00:18:02,724
Hey, folks, let's hear it for
all these wranglers tonight.
435
00:18:02,724 --> 00:18:05,137
They're workin' extra hard
to bring immunity
436
00:18:05,137 --> 00:18:07,172
to your community.
437
00:18:07,172 --> 00:18:10,793
Alright, folks, we are now
ready for the main event!
438
00:18:10,793 --> 00:18:15,172
This young man hasnever had
a single immunization.
439
00:18:15,172 --> 00:18:17,517
[ Walls rattling ] He says he is an orthodox Jew
440
00:18:17,517 --> 00:18:20,034
and a conscientious objector.
441
00:18:20,034 --> 00:18:22,344
Everyone put your hands
together now for little
442
00:18:22,344 --> 00:18:24,827
Eric "The South Park Piggy"
Cartman.
443
00:18:24,827 --> 00:18:28,034
[ Cheers and applause ]
444
00:18:28,034 --> 00:18:29,965
Sooouuuiiieee!
445
00:18:29,965 --> 00:18:31,344
[ Shouts ]
446
00:18:31,344 --> 00:18:36,655
[ Squealing ][ Cheers and applause ]
447
00:18:36,655 --> 00:18:39,517
ANNOUNCER: There he goes folks!
Dear Lord, he's a slippery one.
448
00:18:39,517 --> 00:18:41,000
[ Squealing continues ]
449
00:18:45,689 --> 00:18:47,000
[ Gearshift slides ]
450
00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:48,620
Do you remember
we used to come here
451
00:18:48,620 --> 00:18:51,689
and look over
the town lights together?
452
00:18:51,689 --> 00:18:53,172
Yeah, so what?
453
00:18:53,172 --> 00:18:55,068
Then you turned
into an asshole.
454
00:18:55,068 --> 00:18:58,206
I brought you here
to apologize, Towelie.
455
00:18:58,206 --> 00:18:59,517
I let the money go
to my head.
456
00:18:59,517 --> 00:19:01,034
I -- I got greedy,
457
00:19:01,034 --> 00:19:03,172
and I started acting
like a towel.
458
00:19:03,172 --> 00:19:04,689
I need you back.
459
00:19:04,689 --> 00:19:07,586
I need Tegridy back
the way it used to be.
460
00:19:07,586 --> 00:19:09,758
No more harassing
home growers?
461
00:19:09,758 --> 00:19:11,586
No more harassing home growers.
462
00:19:11,586 --> 00:19:14,034
No more dealing with those
MedMen assholes.
463
00:19:14,034 --> 00:19:15,379
No more MedMen.
464
00:19:15,379 --> 00:19:17,965
No more kissing China's ass?
465
00:19:17,965 --> 00:19:20,103
China's actually a free
and loving country that --
466
00:19:20,103 --> 00:19:21,586
I'm out.[ Door closes ]
467
00:19:21,586 --> 00:19:24,379
Wait! Wait, Towelie!
Come on, I need you!
468
00:19:24,379 --> 00:19:26,103
I'm never working
for a company
469
00:19:26,103 --> 00:19:28,344
that's regulated
by a communist government.
470
00:19:28,344 --> 00:19:29,931
Okay, okay...
471
00:19:29,931 --> 00:19:31,724
No more selling
to the Chinese.
472
00:19:31,724 --> 00:19:35,689
Then say it. Say, "Fuck
the Chinese government.
473
00:19:35,689 --> 00:19:37,517
[ Quietly ] Fuck the Chinese
government.
474
00:19:37,517 --> 00:19:39,241
I didn't hear you.
475
00:19:39,241 --> 00:19:42,275
Fuck the Chinese government!
There!
476
00:19:42,275 --> 00:19:43,586
Well...
477
00:19:43,586 --> 00:19:46,758
you just got
your partner back.
478
00:19:46,758 --> 00:19:49,758
[ Laughs ]
This is it.
479
00:19:49,758 --> 00:19:51,655
This is the moment
that Tegridy Farms
480
00:19:51,655 --> 00:19:54,206
got back on track.
481
00:19:54,206 --> 00:19:55,965
♪♪
482
00:19:55,965 --> 00:19:58,758
ANNOUNCER: Dear Lord, we are
goin' on 16 minutes here
483
00:19:58,758 --> 00:20:01,275
and ain't nobody caught
this youngin![ Squealing ]
484
00:20:01,275 --> 00:20:03,517
This might very well be
a world record
485
00:20:03,517 --> 00:20:05,793
you're seeing here, folks.[ Squealing continues ]
486
00:20:05,793 --> 00:20:08,620
Get out of my way!
Move it!
487
00:20:08,620 --> 00:20:11,172
Whoa, whoa, Mrs. Cartman.
Everything is fine here.
488
00:20:13,551 --> 00:20:15,793
It's okay, Liane!
They know what they're doing!
489
00:20:17,517 --> 00:20:19,551
[ Squealing continues ]
490
00:20:19,551 --> 00:20:21,896
[ Man grunts ][ Crowd ooh's ]
491
00:20:21,896 --> 00:20:24,379
Oh, looks like we've got a
concerned parent in there,
492
00:20:24,379 --> 00:20:26,655
tryin' to take issue
with her child's well bein'.
493
00:20:26,655 --> 00:20:28,206
♪♪
494
00:20:28,206 --> 00:20:29,862
[ Squealing continues ]
495
00:20:29,862 --> 00:20:32,241
[ Grunts ]
496
00:20:32,241 --> 00:20:33,275
[ Crowd ohh's ]
497
00:20:33,275 --> 00:20:35,551
Mooommm!
498
00:20:35,551 --> 00:20:38,586
Leave my son alonnnneeeeee!
499
00:20:38,586 --> 00:20:41,896
♪♪
500
00:20:41,896 --> 00:20:43,517
[ Screams ][ Music stops ]
501
00:20:43,517 --> 00:20:46,344
[ Crowd ohhhh's ]
502
00:20:56,206 --> 00:20:58,689
I know I'm not the greatest mom
in the world.
503
00:20:58,689 --> 00:21:00,827
I do the best I can.
504
00:21:00,827 --> 00:21:02,620
Whatever happens now
505
00:21:02,620 --> 00:21:04,758
is going to be done my way.
506
00:21:04,758 --> 00:21:06,275
Come on, Eric.
507
00:21:09,620 --> 00:21:11,103
Wait, Mom.
508
00:21:11,103 --> 00:21:12,413
No, Eric!
509
00:21:12,413 --> 00:21:14,413
No shot, no toy!
510
00:21:14,413 --> 00:21:15,827
What?!
511
00:21:21,689 --> 00:21:23,793
Okay, doctor,
I'm ready for my shots.
512
00:21:23,793 --> 00:21:26,965
Eric, I've been speaking
with your mother...
513
00:21:26,965 --> 00:21:30,000
I'm afraid
there's some bad news.Bad news?
514
00:21:30,000 --> 00:21:31,620
What are you talking about?
Mom?
515
00:21:31,620 --> 00:21:33,862
Your mother received
a heavy dose of vaccine
516
00:21:33,862 --> 00:21:35,448
that wasn't meant
for an adult.
517
00:21:35,448 --> 00:21:38,068
I'm afraid there have been...
side effects.
518
00:21:38,068 --> 00:21:40,275
What side effects?
Mom?! Mom!
519
00:21:40,275 --> 00:21:42,000
Mom? Are you here, M--
[ Gasps ]
520
00:21:44,620 --> 00:21:47,137
[ Softly ] Eric...
521
00:21:47,137 --> 00:21:48,448
[ Echoing ] Nooo...
522
00:21:48,448 --> 00:21:50,172
Noooooo!
523
00:21:55,275 --> 00:22:05,275
♪♪
524
00:22:05,275 --> 00:22:15,137
♪♪
525
00:22:15,137 --> 00:22:25,000
♪♪
38100
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