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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:09,470 --> 00:00:11,150 Relax. Why all the karate? 2 00:00:12,090 --> 00:00:13,990 It's pronounced karate, Mom. 3 00:00:14,270 --> 00:00:15,270 And I'm mad. 4 00:00:15,650 --> 00:00:18,910 Because California sucks. I don't want to live here. I want to move back to 5 00:00:18,910 --> 00:00:19,910 Newark. 6 00:00:20,210 --> 00:00:21,290 Well, sweetie, we can. 7 00:00:21,850 --> 00:00:24,770 I can make up to ten grand a month working at the clubs here. 8 00:00:25,190 --> 00:00:28,570 And once my website takes off and I start doing movies, I can make that in a 9 00:00:28,570 --> 00:00:31,790 week. Now, come on. You're going to feel better once you get laid. 10 00:00:32,110 --> 00:00:34,630 I know. I always feel better with a hot cock in my mouth. 11 00:00:36,490 --> 00:00:40,250 I can't even leave this stupid apartment. I hate it here, stupid 12 00:00:40,510 --> 00:00:41,510 Hi -yah! 13 00:00:41,870 --> 00:00:43,390 Aw, there, there, sweetie. 14 00:00:43,910 --> 00:00:47,470 You're going to feel much better once you get laid. Let me help you. 15 00:00:51,290 --> 00:00:52,290 Here. 16 00:01:00,330 --> 00:01:01,450 Oh, hi. 17 00:01:02,310 --> 00:01:04,489 Hi. Oh, y 'all, that's my son. 18 00:01:04,849 --> 00:01:05,850 We took. 19 00:01:06,030 --> 00:01:07,490 He has an evil karate instructor. 20 00:01:08,230 --> 00:01:09,710 I thought he could show you some moves. 21 00:01:11,010 --> 00:01:14,550 Take that, douche. No mercy! 22 00:01:15,030 --> 00:01:17,830 Now I'm gonna go fuck your mom while you sleep on that couch. 23 00:01:18,230 --> 00:01:20,710 Little shithead. You're gonna be a great daddy. 24 00:01:21,350 --> 00:01:22,350 Shut up. 25 00:01:24,750 --> 00:01:25,750 I am. 26 00:01:26,550 --> 00:01:27,990 You're pretty bad at yourself, huh? 27 00:01:29,150 --> 00:01:30,150 Yeah. 28 00:01:46,000 --> 00:01:47,200 Can you lift me up a little bit? 29 00:01:51,220 --> 00:01:55,020 I need 30 00:01:55,020 --> 00:02:02,280 to 31 00:02:02,280 --> 00:02:03,280 handle it. 32 00:03:50,190 --> 00:03:51,490 Get up. Get up. 33 00:03:51,870 --> 00:03:53,630 Get up. 34 00:07:11,060 --> 00:07:13,860 I don't know. 35 00:08:07,530 --> 00:08:08,610 I can't wait for this to rip me open. 36 00:08:09,990 --> 00:08:11,090 Fuck your little holes. 37 00:08:12,010 --> 00:08:13,450 There you go. 38 00:08:14,750 --> 00:08:18,030 Oh my God. 39 00:10:14,920 --> 00:10:16,180 Oh, yeah. 40 00:10:17,580 --> 00:10:18,960 Oh, God. 41 00:16:41,070 --> 00:16:42,070 Thank you. 42 00:17:46,060 --> 00:17:50,620 Waiting on fly, wait a long time, no fly. 43 00:17:53,200 --> 00:17:55,380 What to catch when fly, no fly. 44 00:17:57,600 --> 00:18:01,160 Unless, smarter than fly. 45 00:18:30,540 --> 00:18:31,540 What's your name? 46 00:18:32,700 --> 00:18:33,700 Daniel. 47 00:18:35,420 --> 00:18:36,420 Daniel. 48 00:18:37,280 --> 00:18:38,280 Daniel, son. 49 00:18:39,360 --> 00:18:43,540 Catch more flies with shit than no shit. 50 00:18:59,690 --> 00:19:00,690 hand technique. 51 00:19:03,090 --> 00:19:09,410 I see now my mission. 52 00:19:10,050 --> 00:19:11,590 I can take you as my student. 53 00:19:12,210 --> 00:19:18,770 I shall be your sensei and teach you what you wish to know. 54 00:19:29,389 --> 00:19:30,389 Think to my offense. 55 00:19:42,590 --> 00:19:44,510 Cobra Kai initiation ceremony, babe. 56 00:19:44,730 --> 00:19:45,930 Ever been with a Cobra Kai? 57 00:19:46,610 --> 00:19:47,610 Ever been with two? 58 00:21:04,200 --> 00:21:05,200 Okay. 59 00:23:46,659 --> 00:23:48,060 Ow! 60 00:32:51,150 --> 00:32:52,150 No. No. 61 00:37:45,740 --> 00:37:47,520 fuck are you doing here? Who the fuck is this? 62 00:37:47,740 --> 00:37:49,240 It doesn't matter. What are you doing here? 63 00:37:49,480 --> 00:37:51,260 What do you mean it doesn't matter? She's naked. 64 00:37:51,500 --> 00:37:52,600 It wasn't doing anything. 65 00:37:52,940 --> 00:37:54,280 Why don't you just get out of here? 66 00:37:54,680 --> 00:37:55,760 Did you fuck her? 67 00:37:56,840 --> 00:37:58,600 Did you fuck her? Did he fuck you? 68 00:37:59,020 --> 00:38:00,020 Yeah. 69 00:38:00,420 --> 00:38:01,680 You're a fucking cheating bastard. 70 00:38:03,240 --> 00:38:05,440 What do you mean I don't know anything? You don't know anything. 71 00:38:05,720 --> 00:38:06,720 Hey, 72 00:38:07,160 --> 00:38:09,280 don't talk to her like that, bro. 73 00:38:26,860 --> 00:38:27,860 Why don't you get out of here? 74 00:39:19,550 --> 00:39:21,690 Mr. McGee, I'm here to train. 75 00:39:22,170 --> 00:39:23,810 I'm here to get karate -sized. 76 00:39:43,490 --> 00:39:46,090 Hey, what was that move? 77 00:39:46,470 --> 00:39:47,770 Can you show me that? 78 00:39:56,300 --> 00:39:57,300 I ain't your friends. 79 00:39:57,780 --> 00:39:59,840 Look, man, I'm not gonna fuck your dick. 80 00:40:00,640 --> 00:40:02,280 Hey, no, fuck dick! Fuck dick! 81 00:40:02,820 --> 00:40:03,820 Fuck dick later! 82 00:40:17,080 --> 00:40:20,360 You must be... Lola. 83 00:40:32,110 --> 00:40:33,110 Took a whack on. 84 00:40:34,250 --> 00:40:35,810 Took a whack off. 85 00:41:51,030 --> 00:41:52,710 What are you doing? 86 00:41:53,810 --> 00:41:54,850 Never you in the mind. 87 00:41:56,870 --> 00:41:59,030 Yeah, but that's totally distracting. 88 00:41:59,270 --> 00:42:00,350 Never you in the mind. 89 00:42:00,890 --> 00:42:02,750 You just wax on, wax off. 90 00:42:03,990 --> 00:42:05,250 Totally distracting. Good. 91 00:42:05,610 --> 00:42:06,610 Did you focus? 92 00:42:07,670 --> 00:42:11,790 Everything that bothers you, causes trouble, must be fixed. 93 00:42:12,830 --> 00:42:13,830 Yeah, but... 94 00:42:13,960 --> 00:42:14,960 What's wrong? 95 00:42:15,600 --> 00:42:16,459 What's wrong? 96 00:42:16,460 --> 00:42:18,060 But? No but? 97 00:42:18,360 --> 00:42:19,360 No but for you? 98 00:42:49,520 --> 00:42:51,260 Help me out. You show your golden parachute. 99 00:42:52,060 --> 00:42:53,440 Yeah. Reach out. 100 00:43:27,050 --> 00:43:27,808 Wax off. 101 00:43:27,810 --> 00:43:28,810 Wax off. 102 00:43:41,630 --> 00:43:42,630 Wax off. 103 00:43:43,430 --> 00:43:48,270 Wax off. Wax off. Wax off. Wax off. 104 00:43:49,110 --> 00:43:50,110 Wax off. 105 00:43:50,170 --> 00:43:51,390 Wax off. 106 00:54:54,830 --> 00:54:59,710 That man put his udar noodle into your mother's fishbowl. 107 00:54:59,990 --> 00:55:02,250 That man is evil karate teacher. 108 00:55:02,570 --> 00:55:05,970 A man who trained the boy who kicked your ass. 109 00:55:06,210 --> 00:55:07,610 That bad guy. 110 00:55:09,790 --> 00:55:11,130 You need to stop him. 111 00:55:11,610 --> 00:55:14,190 I train you to stop him. 112 00:55:15,330 --> 00:55:22,170 You need to beat him and win heart of girl and make little baby much yours. 113 00:55:23,490 --> 00:55:24,490 When's the tournament? 114 00:55:26,430 --> 00:55:27,430 Tomorrow. 115 00:55:28,770 --> 00:55:29,770 What? 116 00:55:30,370 --> 00:55:31,510 I mean, 117 00:55:32,250 --> 00:55:36,650 what happened to the whole, like, montage of them, like, beating me up and 118 00:55:36,650 --> 00:55:40,050 like, look, I want to fight you in the tournament. You can't touch me until we 119 00:55:40,050 --> 00:55:41,710 have the fight. What happened to all that? 120 00:55:42,270 --> 00:55:43,270 No time. 121 00:55:43,390 --> 00:55:44,390 10 -page script. 122 00:55:44,490 --> 00:55:48,510 Only time for sex and barely enough time for top technique. 123 00:56:22,030 --> 00:56:23,030 No more tea. 124 00:56:53,680 --> 00:56:54,680 The cock says you are ready. 125 00:56:55,220 --> 00:56:56,220 We're ready. 126 00:57:02,400 --> 00:57:09,200 I don't... I really... 127 00:57:09,200 --> 00:57:11,380 I don't want this guy, Walker. Hey! 128 00:57:12,040 --> 00:57:15,300 Hey! You're gonna do great, Daniel. We're all rooting for you. 129 00:57:15,840 --> 00:57:16,880 Uh -uh. Okay. 130 00:57:18,080 --> 00:57:19,080 Oh. 131 00:57:19,360 --> 00:57:20,360 Sorry, I'm sorry. 132 00:57:29,520 --> 00:57:31,760 Welcome to our martial art competition. 133 00:57:32,140 --> 00:57:35,180 Our first fight from Cobra Khan. 134 00:57:35,920 --> 00:57:42,500 And from the Miyagi 135 00:57:42,500 --> 00:57:46,040 Dojo. Please welcome Daniel Tan. 136 00:57:47,580 --> 00:57:48,580 Fighter. 137 00:57:49,840 --> 00:57:51,320 What are you 138 00:57:51,320 --> 00:57:58,240 doing this dancing for? 139 00:59:46,920 --> 00:59:47,920 busted leg. 140 00:59:49,860 --> 00:59:52,040 Where's Mr. Miyagi? Where's my mom? 141 00:59:52,880 --> 00:59:54,020 You don't want to know. 142 00:59:57,980 --> 01:00:04,680 Look, I don't want you to die without knowing what my vagina feels 143 01:00:04,680 --> 01:00:05,680 like. 144 01:00:06,660 --> 01:00:07,800 Take me, Danny. 145 01:00:09,060 --> 01:00:10,060 Take me. 146 01:00:12,240 --> 01:00:13,260 I'm a virgin. 147 01:00:14,060 --> 01:00:15,060 Me too. 148 01:01:30,290 --> 01:01:31,690 Oh. 149 01:01:56,839 --> 01:01:58,240 um 150 01:05:57,840 --> 01:05:58,840 Bye. 151 01:06:29,610 --> 01:06:30,610 Ah. 152 01:08:53,260 --> 01:08:55,420 You won't cry. 153 01:09:11,220 --> 01:09:13,260 Oh, my. 154 01:09:50,600 --> 01:09:53,580 Oh my god. 155 01:09:54,620 --> 01:09:55,780 Oh 156 01:09:55,780 --> 01:10:02,560 my 157 01:10:02,560 --> 01:10:04,920 god. Oh my god. 158 01:11:01,840 --> 01:11:03,080 Yeah. 159 01:11:07,060 --> 01:11:08,300 Yeah. 160 01:13:12,330 --> 01:13:14,110 I'm totally fine with you. 161 01:13:17,410 --> 01:13:18,930 I love you so much. 162 01:13:55,760 --> 01:13:56,760 Oh, my God. 163 01:13:57,040 --> 01:13:58,940 Oh, my God, it feels so good. 164 01:15:34,120 --> 01:15:35,120 Oh, God. 165 01:16:50,860 --> 01:16:51,860 Thank you. 166 01:17:45,320 --> 01:17:46,320 Women must leave. 167 01:17:46,580 --> 01:17:48,640 Fuck you. I'm not going anywhere. 168 01:17:49,780 --> 01:17:50,780 Very well. 169 01:17:53,000 --> 01:17:54,100 What are you gonna do? 170 01:17:55,240 --> 01:17:56,620 Prepare yourself, Goldenwood. 171 01:18:01,420 --> 01:18:02,420 Oh! 172 01:18:05,660 --> 01:18:06,660 Stay gold. 173 01:18:17,450 --> 01:18:21,890 Last martial art fight, unfortunately, is a win by default. 174 01:18:22,370 --> 01:18:24,830 So from Cobra Khan, the winner... 175 01:18:24,830 --> 01:18:31,690 Okay, we have a fight after all. 176 01:18:32,010 --> 01:18:38,450 From Cobra Khan, this is Johnny versus, from the Miyagi Dojo, 177 01:18:38,710 --> 01:18:40,410 Daniel Son. 178 01:18:44,890 --> 01:18:46,510 Fighters, take care of the other leg. 179 01:18:47,240 --> 01:18:48,500 You sure you wish to do this to your son? 180 01:18:48,880 --> 01:18:50,700 Yeah. You wish no dishonor by leaving. 181 01:18:52,000 --> 01:18:53,740 Do not use golden parachute. 182 01:18:54,300 --> 01:18:55,840 And that's absolutely necessary. 183 01:18:56,440 --> 01:18:57,440 You ready? Why? 184 01:18:59,940 --> 01:19:02,280 Because if you do it wrong, it can kill you. 185 01:19:02,500 --> 01:19:05,800 The scrotum's not meant to be stretched out. Is the word there scrotum? 186 01:19:06,240 --> 01:19:07,240 Yummy. 187 01:19:11,500 --> 01:19:12,500 Hit him! 11207

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