Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:05,999
Anyone watching thinking we know fuck
all about knowing fuck all about owt,
2
00:00:06,080 --> 00:00:09,539
needs to watch their backs.
So you've had your Labour,
3
00:00:09,579 --> 00:00:12,998
reclassifying skunk, sending
prices sky-high, literally,
4
00:00:13,078 --> 00:00:16,997
literally taking the
grass from its own roots!
5
00:00:17,069 --> 00:00:19,228
Now you've got your ConDemNation,
6
00:00:19,229 --> 00:00:22,988
Liberals noshing Tories like
altar boys picking dimps up!
7
00:00:22,989 --> 00:00:26,468
Have we had a national
fucking stroke or what?
8
00:00:26,469 --> 00:00:30,468
Is revolution a word or was it never?
9
00:00:30,789 --> 00:00:32,868
Anybody watching needs to know,
10
00:00:32,869 --> 00:00:36,308
we cope better than average
with irony in Chatsworth.
11
00:00:36,309 --> 00:00:39,628
Well, for fuck's sake,
we live in Manchester
12
00:00:39,629 --> 00:00:42,508
and they charge us for water?!
13
00:00:42,509 --> 00:00:46,508
I wandered lonely as a clown,
necking mushrooms rarely found.
14
00:00:47,749 --> 00:00:50,428
This green and pleasant
land in ancient times...
15
00:00:50,429 --> 00:00:53,508
Yak-yak-yak-yak-yak-yak-yak-yak-yak!
16
00:00:53,509 --> 00:00:56,788
It's not theirs any more.
17
00:00:56,789 --> 00:00:59,268
This is our England now!
18
00:01:00,454 --> 00:01:02,433
Paaaarty!
19
00:01:02,506 --> 00:01:06,621
Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells
http://UKsubtitles.ru.
20
00:01:12,276 --> 00:01:15,915
'Some people say parenting's
the hardest thing in the world.'
21
00:01:15,916 --> 00:01:19,915
Cilla, it's too early,
darling, go back to bed.
22
00:01:21,105 --> 00:01:22,424
Do you want your brekkie then?
23
00:01:22,425 --> 00:01:25,784
'Those people have never
brokered major drug deals
24
00:01:25,785 --> 00:01:28,064
'between gangs of Scouse and Mancs,
25
00:01:28,065 --> 00:01:32,064
'robbed post offices
or smuggled a mobile phone
26
00:01:32,265 --> 00:01:35,624
'and charger in Strangeways.
27
00:01:35,625 --> 00:01:38,584
'Mothering's a natural thing.
28
00:01:38,585 --> 00:01:42,184
'It's not something you need
to work at, you just do it.
29
00:01:42,185 --> 00:01:46,024
'Make sure they're fed, watered,
pick 'em up if they fall over
30
00:01:46,025 --> 00:01:47,224
'and other than that...'
31
00:01:47,225 --> 00:01:51,104
Eat that, then sleep. Night!
32
00:01:51,105 --> 00:01:53,144
'Make sure they do as they're told.'
33
00:02:26,145 --> 00:02:29,184
If I'm up, every fucker's up.
34
00:02:29,185 --> 00:02:31,104
Fire!
35
00:02:31,105 --> 00:02:33,104
Fire!
36
00:02:33,105 --> 00:02:37,024
Quick! There's a big fuck-off
fire, people are dying!
37
00:02:37,025 --> 00:02:40,104
Please, someone, help!
38
00:02:43,945 --> 00:02:45,424
Morning Frank!
39
00:02:53,745 --> 00:02:57,424
Morning, Pillhead. Another warehouse
project last night, was it?
40
00:02:57,425 --> 00:03:01,024
Yeah, man.
Yeah, man.
41
00:03:01,025 --> 00:03:03,664
Eh, don't forget.
42
00:03:03,665 --> 00:03:07,664
Smile! You're about to step onstage.
43
00:03:21,385 --> 00:03:22,184
Frank?
44
00:03:22,185 --> 00:03:23,384
Boss man!
45
00:03:23,385 --> 00:03:26,304
This is Cheryl, our latest newbie.
46
00:03:26,305 --> 00:03:28,624
You'll show her the
ropes, won't you,
47
00:03:28,625 --> 00:03:31,344
as our longest serving team member?
48
00:03:31,345 --> 00:03:35,344
I've only been here a week!
49
00:03:48,785 --> 00:03:52,784
Everything going OK? Yep?
50
00:03:53,505 --> 00:03:57,504
Walk this way. And what we say is...
51
00:03:58,305 --> 00:04:02,304
Have a greaaaaaat day.
52
00:04:05,745 --> 00:04:07,464
Do you think you could
find a bigger chair?!
53
00:04:07,465 --> 00:04:08,824
Yeah, tell me about it!
54
00:04:08,825 --> 00:04:10,984
Drop it down your end.
55
00:04:10,985 --> 00:04:12,104
Not you!
56
00:04:12,105 --> 00:04:15,184
For God's sake, why don't you
just pick the bleeding thing up?!
57
00:04:15,185 --> 00:04:17,744
Why won't you do what I ask?!
58
00:04:17,745 --> 00:04:19,184
Right, sit there.
59
00:04:19,185 --> 00:04:19,944
What's going on?
60
00:04:19,945 --> 00:04:22,704
He won't do his drawing at the
table so there's felt tip all over.
61
00:04:22,705 --> 00:04:25,104
Right, you sit there,
and you're drinking that juice.
62
00:04:25,105 --> 00:04:26,064
He's only a baby.
63
00:04:26,065 --> 00:04:30,064
He's wrecking the place! Look!
64
00:04:30,625 --> 00:04:31,464
It's not funny, Mimi!
65
00:04:31,465 --> 00:04:32,864
But it kind of is.
66
00:04:32,865 --> 00:04:33,864
What, drawing a co -?
67
00:04:33,865 --> 00:04:34,824
Rocket.
68
00:04:34,825 --> 00:04:36,704
Rocket.
69
00:04:36,705 --> 00:04:40,504
Drawing a rocket all over the doors
and all over the walls isn't right.
70
00:04:40,505 --> 00:04:42,944
Karen, boys will be boys.
71
00:04:42,945 --> 00:04:46,624
Our Micky was always
drawing c... rockets.
72
00:04:46,625 --> 00:04:49,704
He was obsessed with 'em,
draw 'em morning till night.
73
00:04:49,705 --> 00:04:52,624
There was rockets here, there,
they were all over the place!
74
00:04:52,625 --> 00:04:55,584
They weren't all over your living
room walls. It's not normal!
75
00:04:55,585 --> 00:04:56,184
He's only a kid.
76
00:04:56,185 --> 00:04:58,464
What is the point of
us buying nice furniture,
77
00:04:58,465 --> 00:05:00,984
trying to make the place look
good, when he just trashes it?
78
00:05:00,985 --> 00:05:03,984
You need to show him who's boss.
Give him a little smack.
79
00:05:03,985 --> 00:05:06,904
What, and you think
that's what he needs?
80
00:05:06,905 --> 00:05:10,024
Give you a tap on the arse,
didn't do you any harm, did it?
81
00:05:10,025 --> 00:05:11,824
I've been such a naughty boy.
82
00:05:11,825 --> 00:05:15,824
Oof! Naughtier than that!
83
00:05:16,985 --> 00:05:17,904
Yeah.
84
00:05:17,905 --> 00:05:21,104
Well, me and Jamie don't
believe in hitting, do we?
85
00:05:21,105 --> 00:05:23,504
Give over. You two have
knocked out half of Chatsworth.
86
00:05:23,505 --> 00:05:25,944
Hitting Connor.
87
00:05:25,945 --> 00:05:29,944
Fair but firm. Kids need
structure, boundaries and rules.
88
00:05:30,905 --> 00:05:34,904
Connor, no!
89
00:05:35,465 --> 00:05:37,344
Aren't you supposed to be at school?
90
00:05:37,345 --> 00:05:39,184
It's only assembly
and shit like that.
91
00:05:39,185 --> 00:05:42,544
Doesn't matter what it is.
Get your arse down there
92
00:05:42,545 --> 00:05:45,704
before education start banging
on us door again. Now!
93
00:05:45,705 --> 00:05:47,184
All right, keep your wig on.
94
00:05:47,185 --> 00:05:48,584
I mean it, Aidan,
we don't need the hassle.
95
00:05:48,585 --> 00:05:50,664
Yeah, yeah.
96
00:05:50,665 --> 00:05:54,664
Show off in front of your mate and
you'll get a boot up the arse, lad.
97
00:05:59,585 --> 00:06:01,664
She's not bad your mum.
I'd well slip her one.
98
00:06:01,665 --> 00:06:05,664
She ain't my mum! She's just
some prozzie who crashes here.
99
00:06:09,385 --> 00:06:11,384
I wanted to go to uni.
100
00:06:11,385 --> 00:06:13,224
Why didn't you?
101
00:06:13,225 --> 00:06:14,624
There's not much point
nowadays, is there?
102
00:06:14,625 --> 00:06:16,264
Was there ever?
103
00:06:16,265 --> 00:06:18,904
What are yous doing out there?!
104
00:06:18,905 --> 00:06:21,344
Just showing Cheryl the ropes,
you know, like you said.
105
00:06:21,345 --> 00:06:24,104
Got to get her up to speed
on the rule book, haven't we?
106
00:06:24,105 --> 00:06:27,944
Well, can you carry on inside?
It's the lunchtime rush.
I need you on the counter.
107
00:06:27,945 --> 00:06:28,704
I'm on my way.
108
00:06:28,705 --> 00:06:31,864
Look, hold up. We're just grabbing
a fresh lung full of, you know,
109
00:06:31,865 --> 00:06:35,864
and we'll be right there.
Wesley!
110
00:06:35,945 --> 00:06:39,824
Be quick!
Yeah.
111
00:06:39,825 --> 00:06:41,744
If they're a bit short-staffed,
shouldn't we just...?
112
00:06:41,745 --> 00:06:43,664
What's the worst that can happen?
113
00:06:43,665 --> 00:06:46,584
Some lard-arse is going to be two
minutes late getting their burger?
114
00:06:46,585 --> 00:06:50,584
Can't have management throwing
their weight around, can we? Wankers.
115
00:06:52,385 --> 00:06:56,384
Oi! That fucking chair
is completely stuck now!
116
00:06:59,545 --> 00:07:02,424
Robbed the library?
117
00:07:02,425 --> 00:07:06,424
Free The Child,
Free the Mother, haha!
118
00:07:06,505 --> 00:07:10,144
"By Professor Alex Yates."
119
00:07:10,145 --> 00:07:13,264
Got some really
good ideas, actually.
120
00:07:13,265 --> 00:07:16,544
"You and your child
will discover the secret
121
00:07:16,545 --> 00:07:20,544
"to smash through the glass
ceiling and unlock the gateway
122
00:07:20,705 --> 00:07:24,704
"to a new world of freedom,
happiness and success."
123
00:07:26,145 --> 00:07:30,144
No harm in having
a little bit of help.
124
00:07:30,745 --> 00:07:33,904
Eh, ease up, will you?
You know she's struggling.
125
00:07:33,905 --> 00:07:37,904
I told her, kids needs rules!
I brought you up on strict rules.
126
00:07:38,745 --> 00:07:40,784
Never done you any harm.
127
00:07:40,785 --> 00:07:42,584
You broke my rules, mate,
128
00:07:42,585 --> 00:07:45,664
so now I've got to break
something of yours, yeah?
129
00:07:45,665 --> 00:07:47,184
No!
130
00:07:47,185 --> 00:07:48,424
Oh, no!
131
00:07:48,425 --> 00:07:49,864
Get us a vodka.
132
00:07:49,865 --> 00:07:52,144
Just don't let it spin
out of control, Mam.
133
00:07:52,145 --> 00:07:53,704
I know what you're fucking like.
134
00:07:53,705 --> 00:07:55,264
I doubt he meant it.
135
00:07:55,265 --> 00:07:56,264
Oh, he meant it all right.
136
00:07:56,265 --> 00:07:59,904
I mean, maybe he meant
it affectionately?
137
00:07:59,905 --> 00:08:03,464
"Just some prozzie who crashes
here"? How is that affectionate?
138
00:08:03,465 --> 00:08:07,024
His mum's a prost... hooker?
139
00:08:07,025 --> 00:08:07,984
Sex worker.
140
00:08:07,985 --> 00:08:10,784
Sex worker. So maybe he just
don't know any different.
141
00:08:10,785 --> 00:08:12,944
He thinks all women are prostitutes?
142
00:08:12,945 --> 00:08:13,704
Yeah, could be.
143
00:08:13,705 --> 00:08:15,704
I'm going to have to work on him.
144
00:08:15,705 --> 00:08:19,264
But you're a woman and a pros...
145
00:08:19,265 --> 00:08:23,264
sex worker...
146
00:08:26,225 --> 00:08:29,024
Mayo the burgers,
wrap 'em up, get em out.
147
00:08:29,025 --> 00:08:32,384
Mayo the burgers, wrap
'em up, get... Pillhead?!
148
00:08:32,385 --> 00:08:36,384
Oh, fuck!
149
00:08:37,345 --> 00:08:39,904
Oh, fucking hell!
150
00:08:39,905 --> 00:08:43,464
Rinse them under the tap.
151
00:08:43,465 --> 00:08:45,544
We're going to have
to shut the shop down!
152
00:08:45,545 --> 00:08:47,384
If we're closed, we don't get paid.
153
00:08:48,685 --> 00:08:51,124
Shut down, everyone. Shut it down.
154
00:08:51,125 --> 00:08:52,204
What's the problem?
155
00:08:52,205 --> 00:08:55,884
Aside from him chucking up
in the deep fat fryer, nothing!
156
00:08:55,885 --> 00:08:57,804
What, in there?!
157
00:08:57,805 --> 00:08:58,724
I told him I felt rough.
158
00:08:58,725 --> 00:09:01,964
We'll have to kill the fryer,
cool the oil, drain, clean...
159
00:09:01,965 --> 00:09:04,484
Whoa, whoa! We don't have to do that.
160
00:09:04,485 --> 00:09:06,844
There are health and safety issues.
This is a breach of guidelines.
161
00:09:06,845 --> 00:09:07,964
I'm on full wages...
162
00:09:07,965 --> 00:09:11,884
It's all in the handbook.
Chapter three, subsection B,
"Bodily fluids."
163
00:09:11,885 --> 00:09:14,404
This is a code red.
I need to close the shop.
164
00:09:14,405 --> 00:09:17,004
If you shut it down,
you won't hit your targets.
165
00:09:17,005 --> 00:09:19,244
It's boiling fat, nothing
can live in there.
166
00:09:19,245 --> 00:09:21,044
Just scoop the lumps out
and carry on.
167
00:09:21,045 --> 00:09:24,204
Yeah, if we knew it was
contaminated, we'd drain it
168
00:09:24,205 --> 00:09:27,204
but if we didn't know...?
169
00:09:27,205 --> 00:09:28,004
I couldn't...
170
00:09:28,005 --> 00:09:32,004
You're out front serving customers.
You don't know about it, do you?
171
00:09:32,405 --> 00:09:33,884
It'll all be fine. Trust me.
172
00:09:33,885 --> 00:09:37,004
You, go and stick your
head in the fridge.
173
00:09:37,005 --> 00:09:40,084
Cheryl front of house with Tracy.
Akeeba, that's right, fresh fries.
174
00:09:40,085 --> 00:09:42,724
Wesley, you clear that up. Come on!
175
00:09:42,725 --> 00:09:46,724
Big time.
176
00:09:48,565 --> 00:09:52,564
Anyone for pakora?
177
00:10:02,365 --> 00:10:06,364
Come on!
178
00:10:13,045 --> 00:10:17,044
World of Burger,
World of Pleasure. Mm-hmm.
179
00:10:21,525 --> 00:10:25,204
Oh-ho! Well done, Teamsters!
180
00:10:26,725 --> 00:10:29,844
Right, come on,
smokers, fill your lungs.
181
00:10:29,845 --> 00:10:32,524
You can cover for us, can't you?
I'm in charge!
182
00:10:32,525 --> 00:10:36,524
Yeah, course you are.
183
00:10:39,805 --> 00:10:41,924
50 quid for a moggy.
184
00:10:41,925 --> 00:10:44,084
I'm brassic and this stupid lunatic
185
00:10:44,085 --> 00:10:47,364
is offering 50 fucking
quid for a furball.
186
00:10:47,365 --> 00:10:50,524
Stupid like that, aren't they? They
get all emotional over daft shit.
187
00:10:50,525 --> 00:10:52,244
If they're on their moon.
188
00:10:52,245 --> 00:10:54,124
Nah, man, my policy's sorted.
189
00:10:54,125 --> 00:10:57,004
In-and-out, no involvement,
no trouble, no fucking headache.
190
00:10:57,005 --> 00:11:01,004
Drop your cocks and grab your
socks, we are off to the flicks.
191
00:11:02,285 --> 00:11:04,804
I'm taking you to see a film.
192
00:11:04,805 --> 00:11:08,804
Him, not you, and no,
don't touch your penis.
193
00:11:15,965 --> 00:11:19,964
No, you can't get the fucking staff.
194
00:11:21,885 --> 00:11:23,204
Hey, Teamsters!
195
00:11:23,205 --> 00:11:27,204
We've got a shift on.
Come on, let's get a, er, shift on.
196
00:11:30,525 --> 00:11:32,844
Ooh, er - wait up, Frank.
197
00:11:32,845 --> 00:11:35,684
You're not on the counter
this afternoon,
198
00:11:35,685 --> 00:11:37,684
I've got something more
suited to your talents.
199
00:11:37,685 --> 00:11:40,804
'World of Burgers chicken deal!'
200
00:11:40,805 --> 00:11:44,804
World of Burgers chicken deal! World
of Burgers, the ultimate chicken.
201
00:11:45,005 --> 00:11:47,284
Fills you up, doesn't let you down.
202
00:11:47,285 --> 00:11:50,917
Come on, love, fair is
fowl and fowl is fair.
203
00:11:54,975 --> 00:11:57,534
You do not want to know
what two Cokes just cost me!
204
00:11:58,870 --> 00:12:02,149
This so-called cinema is so far
up its own fucking arse,
205
00:12:02,178 --> 00:12:03,897
they don't even sell popcorn!
206
00:12:03,898 --> 00:12:05,937
We could've went
to a normal pictures,
207
00:12:05,938 --> 00:12:07,697
with normal films
like normal people.
208
00:12:07,698 --> 00:12:09,937
This has a strong woman in the lead,
209
00:12:09,938 --> 00:12:13,857
cos sometimes films just
show women as pieces of meat.
210
00:12:13,858 --> 00:12:16,057
Oh.
211
00:12:16,058 --> 00:12:17,777
Women aren't just pieces of meat.
212
00:12:17,778 --> 00:12:19,097
We're a lot more than that.
213
00:12:19,098 --> 00:12:22,097
Yeah. We've got our differences.
214
00:12:22,098 --> 00:12:25,417
Men and women, yeah,
not just shagging...
215
00:12:25,418 --> 00:12:28,177
we've got, like, different roles.
216
00:12:28,178 --> 00:12:29,377
Yeah.
217
00:12:29,378 --> 00:12:31,617
They go way back like when
we were cavemen and that.
218
00:12:31,618 --> 00:12:33,337
Yeah, but that's not
exclusive to men.
219
00:12:33,338 --> 00:12:34,377
Yeah but women,
220
00:12:34,378 --> 00:12:36,777
women just stayed in the caves,
carrying wood,
221
00:12:36,778 --> 00:12:39,057
looking after the kids
and cooking the men's food.
222
00:12:39,058 --> 00:12:41,097
But times have changed, haven't they?
223
00:12:41,098 --> 00:12:43,257
It's not really like that
any more, is it?
224
00:12:43,258 --> 00:12:44,857
No. Men sign on and go to the pub
225
00:12:44,858 --> 00:12:47,497
while women fuck around
with their nails.
226
00:12:47,498 --> 00:12:50,257
Can I have a shot?
227
00:12:50,258 --> 00:12:51,497
You're under aged.
228
00:12:51,498 --> 00:12:54,297
Oh. And how old were you
when you started?
229
00:12:54,298 --> 00:12:58,297
C'mon.
230
00:13:02,498 --> 00:13:03,537
Shane.
231
00:13:03,538 --> 00:13:05,777
Y'ello.
232
00:13:05,778 --> 00:13:09,697
I'm a good mum, aren't I?
233
00:13:09,698 --> 00:13:10,817
Aren't I?
234
00:13:10,818 --> 00:13:13,977
Yeah.
235
00:13:13,978 --> 00:13:17,977
Well, you don't seem too sure.
236
00:13:18,258 --> 00:13:20,337
Well, you're the only one
I've had, aren't you?
237
00:13:20,338 --> 00:13:24,337
I've no-one else to compare you to.
238
00:13:25,058 --> 00:13:28,337
I've been good to you lot.
239
00:13:28,338 --> 00:13:31,537
Except for the time you stashed
drugs in Mandy's dolls, yeah.
240
00:13:31,538 --> 00:13:33,817
Taught her about safe places.
241
00:13:33,818 --> 00:13:35,657
And when you took Mickey
prison visiting
242
00:13:35,658 --> 00:13:39,657
when he was ten years old,
and you left him in Strangeways.
243
00:13:39,978 --> 00:13:41,897
Taught him to respect authority.
244
00:13:41,898 --> 00:13:43,697
Mmm.
245
00:13:43,698 --> 00:13:47,537
All in all,
I've done a pretty good job.
246
00:13:47,538 --> 00:13:51,537
Ha! See you later.
247
00:13:52,378 --> 00:13:55,137
I hit these targets and
I'll be up for the new outlet
248
00:13:55,138 --> 00:13:56,457
at the Trafford Centre,
249
00:13:56,458 --> 00:14:00,017
and that would mean that
there'd be a vacancy right here
250
00:14:00,018 --> 00:14:04,017
for some bright young go-getter.
251
00:14:04,338 --> 00:14:07,937
Well, we could, erm,
celebrate the restaurant's birthday?
252
00:14:07,938 --> 00:14:10,177
Pretend it's been here
five years or something?
253
00:14:10,178 --> 00:14:12,297
We could celebrate
the restaurant's birthday!
254
00:14:12,298 --> 00:14:16,057
Decorate it with balloons,
and wear party hats,
255
00:14:16,058 --> 00:14:19,177
and play disco music,
you know, Agadoo and all that...
256
00:14:19,178 --> 00:14:21,617
what do you think?
257
00:14:21,618 --> 00:14:22,777
Yeah.
258
00:14:22,778 --> 00:14:26,777
Yeah. That's a great idea, yeah.
259
00:14:29,538 --> 00:14:30,977
Burger me! Sorry.
260
00:14:30,978 --> 00:14:32,857
OK, Frankie?
261
00:14:32,858 --> 00:14:33,737
How did it go?
262
00:14:33,738 --> 00:14:35,057
Great!
263
00:14:35,058 --> 00:14:36,737
Here you go.
264
00:14:36,738 --> 00:14:39,377
I've got to do me fucking job
here, y'know what I mean?
265
00:14:39,378 --> 00:14:43,377
Hold that.
266
00:14:44,098 --> 00:14:47,457
It was a proper, proper laugh!
267
00:14:47,458 --> 00:14:51,297
And I met this bloke dressed
as a pint, promoting this pub,
268
00:14:51,298 --> 00:14:54,577
and he gave me all these
beer tokens - for all of us!
269
00:14:56,098 --> 00:14:58,377
Brilliant!
270
00:14:58,378 --> 00:15:02,017
Take the costume off, Frank,
you look like a cock.
271
00:15:02,018 --> 00:15:06,017
Back to work!
272
00:15:07,298 --> 00:15:09,457
20 fags, please, Ches.
273
00:15:09,458 --> 00:15:11,017
It's just meat, Lillian, just meat.
274
00:15:11,018 --> 00:15:11,897
They should say "meat", then.
275
00:15:11,898 --> 00:15:12,937
But they do...
276
00:15:12,938 --> 00:15:13,777
halal "meat".
277
00:15:13,778 --> 00:15:15,017
Er, hello?
278
00:15:15,018 --> 00:15:16,577
But why can't they just say "meat"?
279
00:15:16,578 --> 00:15:17,737
Because it's halal!
280
00:15:19,058 --> 00:15:20,497
Connor!
281
00:15:21,258 --> 00:15:24,017
Jesus, Karen,
control him, can't you?
282
00:15:24,018 --> 00:15:28,017
Sorry, Ches.
283
00:15:28,098 --> 00:15:30,457
One just grabs this sign
and went "My big cock", y'know?
284
00:15:30,458 --> 00:15:31,657
Yeah, I fucking get it.
285
00:15:31,658 --> 00:15:33,737
Oi!
286
00:15:33,738 --> 00:15:37,377
You're not automatically entitled
to cigarette breaks, you know.
287
00:15:37,378 --> 00:15:39,537
They're at my discretion.
288
00:15:39,538 --> 00:15:41,177
Balloons.
289
00:15:41,178 --> 00:15:43,377
500. We had a pump, but...
290
00:15:43,378 --> 00:15:44,537
it's broken.
291
00:15:44,538 --> 00:15:46,577
Get blowing, Frank.
292
00:15:46,578 --> 00:15:50,577
You're joking?
293
00:15:58,098 --> 00:16:00,577
Ah, fantastic!
294
00:16:00,578 --> 00:16:02,777
Well done, team Sirs.
295
00:16:02,778 --> 00:16:04,417
Come on, balloons all round.
296
00:16:08,658 --> 00:16:11,417
This isn't DIY fucking SOS!
297
00:16:11,418 --> 00:16:15,417
It's just an old man blowing up
some balloons, right?
298
00:16:15,618 --> 00:16:18,337
Get back to work, all of you!
299
00:16:18,338 --> 00:16:22,337
It's just a bit of teamwork, you
know. You ought to celebrate that.
300
00:16:22,898 --> 00:16:24,457
Now, remember, team,
301
00:16:24,458 --> 00:16:28,377
as you scrub to within
an inch of your lives,
302
00:16:28,378 --> 00:16:32,057
that this is all
Frank Gallagher's fault.
303
00:16:32,058 --> 00:16:33,497
I've done nothing wrong!
304
00:16:33,498 --> 00:16:34,977
I'm the manager.
305
00:16:34,978 --> 00:16:37,577
Not you - me!
306
00:16:37,578 --> 00:16:40,177
And no more fag breaks.
307
00:16:40,178 --> 00:16:44,177
Looked dead interesting -
what d'you reckon?
308
00:16:44,538 --> 00:16:46,177
It had subtitles.
309
00:16:46,178 --> 00:16:48,857
And?
310
00:16:48,858 --> 00:16:51,417
Is that it? Is that
the extent of your review?
311
00:16:51,418 --> 00:16:55,417
OK... I thought it was a very
interesting take on gender politics,
312
00:16:57,698 --> 00:17:00,457
and a muscular piece
of film-making...
313
00:17:00,458 --> 00:17:02,817
You're just reading
that from the poster, aren't you?
314
00:17:02,818 --> 00:17:06,617
Yeah!
315
00:17:06,618 --> 00:17:07,777
Bag of shite, wasn't it?
316
00:17:07,778 --> 00:17:09,097
Yeah.
317
00:17:09,098 --> 00:17:11,057
Come on, let's go get wasted.
318
00:17:11,058 --> 00:17:12,097
Yesss!
319
00:17:12,098 --> 00:17:14,697
You stay there and you do not move,
cos God help me,
320
00:17:14,698 --> 00:17:16,577
I will knock you into next week -
got it?!
321
00:17:16,578 --> 00:17:17,937
Karen?!
322
00:17:17,938 --> 00:17:20,377
He won't do as he's told.
He's wrecking the place.
323
00:17:20,378 --> 00:17:23,377
He's a baby, Karen! Shouting
at him's not going to help, is it?
324
00:17:23,378 --> 00:17:25,617
Well according to your mother,
it is.
325
00:17:25,618 --> 00:17:28,777
I have to show him who is the boss!
326
00:17:28,778 --> 00:17:32,777
Well, what happened to the positive
parenting thing you were doing, eh?
327
00:17:35,178 --> 00:17:37,497
Here you go, darling.
328
00:17:37,498 --> 00:17:40,457
You draw all over the walls,
draw all over the ceilings.
329
00:17:40,458 --> 00:17:43,217
Do what you want,
because I don't care any more.
330
00:17:43,218 --> 00:17:46,577
Mummy is going to be positive!
331
00:17:46,578 --> 00:17:50,097
Easy, innit?
332
00:17:50,098 --> 00:17:53,217
Connor!!
333
00:17:53,218 --> 00:17:54,497
Ahhh.
334
00:17:54,498 --> 00:17:58,497
My mum was a proper good-time girl.
335
00:17:59,818 --> 00:18:02,897
But she drank her looks away
and the fellas pissed off.
336
00:18:02,898 --> 00:18:05,537
She got depressed.
337
00:18:05,538 --> 00:18:09,497
She wouldn't go out or anything.
338
00:18:09,498 --> 00:18:12,537
Was like that till she died.
339
00:18:12,538 --> 00:18:13,657
What about yours?
340
00:18:13,658 --> 00:18:15,017
A slag.
341
00:18:15,018 --> 00:18:16,737
And a smackhead.
342
00:18:16,738 --> 00:18:19,057
There's got to be
more to her than that.
343
00:18:19,058 --> 00:18:22,897
No - that's it, the whole story.
344
00:18:22,898 --> 00:18:25,057
She loves you.
345
00:18:25,058 --> 00:18:26,097
Yeah, right.
346
00:18:26,098 --> 00:18:28,897
She must do. She brought you up,
looked after you.
347
00:18:28,898 --> 00:18:30,017
I was put in care.
348
00:18:30,018 --> 00:18:33,217
Seven families in three years.
349
00:18:33,218 --> 00:18:35,617
She had loads of
chances to clean up.
350
00:18:35,618 --> 00:18:38,977
Medication, counselling, support.
351
00:18:38,978 --> 00:18:42,977
All that shit. She couldn't do it.
352
00:18:43,338 --> 00:18:46,537
So they swiped me.
353
00:18:46,538 --> 00:18:50,177
So, despite her addiction,
354
00:18:50,178 --> 00:18:53,297
and all the nasty crap
that goes with it...
355
00:18:53,298 --> 00:18:55,697
she never gave you up.
356
00:18:55,698 --> 00:18:59,057
Tried to hold onto you.
357
00:18:59,058 --> 00:19:03,057
They took you.
358
00:19:03,338 --> 00:19:07,337
Must've really loved you.
359
00:19:10,178 --> 00:19:11,897
Fuck it.
360
00:19:11,898 --> 00:19:13,297
It's history, anyway.
361
00:19:13,298 --> 00:19:15,617
So, you're stuck wi' me now, are you?
362
00:19:15,618 --> 00:19:19,617
For better or worse!
363
00:19:25,258 --> 00:19:26,697
I knew this would get out of hand.
364
00:19:26,698 --> 00:19:28,897
She's all over the place
because of you.
365
00:19:28,898 --> 00:19:31,857
It's not my fault! I only gave her
a bit of motherly advice.
366
00:19:31,858 --> 00:19:35,377
Why not try getting
your own house in order before
you start helping anyone else?
367
00:19:35,378 --> 00:19:38,297
I'm qualified, thank you very much.
I've had seven kids!
368
00:19:38,298 --> 00:19:42,017
And where are they all now, Mum, eh?
There's only me, Shane and Cilla
left.
369
00:19:42,018 --> 00:19:44,777
Karen's big enough to admit
we're struggling with Connor,
370
00:19:44,778 --> 00:19:47,417
and she's trying to do
something about it. But you,
371
00:19:47,418 --> 00:19:51,417
you think you're perfect, Mam,
and you're not, you're not.
372
00:19:51,698 --> 00:19:55,297
Somewhere along the line, you've
failed every fucking one of us.
373
00:19:55,298 --> 00:19:59,297
So do us a favour and
read that fucking book yourself!
374
00:20:05,498 --> 00:20:09,497
Just be a couple more minutes.
375
00:20:09,698 --> 00:20:12,017
What the fuck?
376
00:20:12,018 --> 00:20:16,017
Frank?
377
00:20:17,058 --> 00:20:18,097
What's going on?
378
00:20:18,098 --> 00:20:19,537
I'm sorry, it's not...
379
00:20:19,538 --> 00:20:22,497
everything's just kind of
slowed down a little bit.
380
00:20:22,498 --> 00:20:25,897
Ever since you binned fag breaks.
381
00:20:25,898 --> 00:20:29,617
Woooo-hoooo.
382
00:20:29,618 --> 00:20:33,617
Haaaaave a grrrrreat day.
383
00:20:36,418 --> 00:20:39,577
This is insubordination!
384
00:20:39,578 --> 00:20:43,177
There's nothing in here that tells us
what speed we need to work at.
385
00:20:43,178 --> 00:20:44,297
You're fired!
386
00:20:44,298 --> 00:20:46,657
Oh, unfortunately, you can't.
387
00:20:46,658 --> 00:20:49,537
Having successfully
completed my trial period,
388
00:20:49,538 --> 00:20:51,617
you can only issue me with a warning
389
00:20:51,618 --> 00:20:54,017
for unprofessional
or gross misconduct,
390
00:20:54,018 --> 00:20:56,217
bringing the company into disrepute,
391
00:20:56,218 --> 00:20:58,657
harming or potentially
harming the company,
392
00:20:58,658 --> 00:21:00,857
the company logo or
any of its employees.
393
00:21:00,858 --> 00:21:02,657
You could launch an investigation,
394
00:21:02,658 --> 00:21:05,577
but you'd have to suspend me
with full pay first.
395
00:21:05,578 --> 00:21:07,017
Fucking European Union.
396
00:21:07,018 --> 00:21:09,337
Well, it's the only union
we've got left, mate.
397
00:21:09,338 --> 00:21:13,337
We are a team.
398
00:21:14,298 --> 00:21:16,617
All of you?
399
00:21:16,618 --> 00:21:19,337
All of us.
400
00:21:19,338 --> 00:21:20,857
I'm part of that team!
401
00:21:20,858 --> 00:21:24,857
Nah, you're management, mate.
402
00:21:35,218 --> 00:21:36,857
OK.
403
00:21:36,858 --> 00:21:40,857
Have it your way.
404
00:21:41,218 --> 00:21:43,057
Welcome to management, Frank.
405
00:21:43,058 --> 00:21:46,017
That's an extra
30 quid a week for you.
406
00:21:46,018 --> 00:21:50,017
Come on, team!
407
00:21:51,018 --> 00:21:54,577
Well, the only thing that
I think we need is a happy team,
408
00:21:54,578 --> 00:21:58,137
so put some choons on
and have a laugh - sorted.
409
00:21:58,138 --> 00:21:59,617
Oh, and fag breaks are back on.
410
00:21:59,618 --> 00:22:03,617
Have one whenever you want.
411
00:22:04,378 --> 00:22:06,057
S'all right with you, innit?
412
00:22:06,058 --> 00:22:09,137
Do whatever you want.
413
00:22:09,138 --> 00:22:12,657
As long as that lot gets sorted
before you clock off.
414
00:22:12,658 --> 00:22:14,817
Staff hours, orders,
415
00:22:14,818 --> 00:22:17,177
rotas. You'll have plenty of time,
416
00:22:17,178 --> 00:22:21,097
providing your team run
the kitchen and counter OK.
417
00:22:21,098 --> 00:22:23,537
Oh, and as you'll know
from paragraph three,
418
00:22:23,538 --> 00:22:25,737
sub-section C
of the company handbook,
419
00:22:25,738 --> 00:22:28,017
"failure to complete
and file paperwork
420
00:22:28,018 --> 00:22:32,017
"is an immediate sackable offence."
421
00:22:34,098 --> 00:22:37,217
Tough at the top, eh, Frank?
422
00:22:37,218 --> 00:22:38,897
Cunt.
423
00:22:55,819 --> 00:22:57,538
Tch-tch-tch-tch!
424
00:22:57,539 --> 00:22:58,618
Here, 50 quid!
425
00:23:06,539 --> 00:23:09,018
Tch-tch-tch-tch!
426
00:23:09,019 --> 00:23:11,258
Shit! Come here you, little fuck!
Tiger!
427
00:23:22,299 --> 00:23:24,098
Kelly! Kelly!
428
00:23:24,099 --> 00:23:25,298
Y'all right?
429
00:23:25,299 --> 00:23:26,618
I wanted a word.
430
00:23:26,619 --> 00:23:29,098
Yeah? Oh, fuck off, Lillian!
431
00:23:29,099 --> 00:23:33,098
Well, what we talked about,
"I've got you now..."
432
00:23:33,099 --> 00:23:35,858
I was wondering if... you want to
go out some time, you and me.
433
00:23:35,859 --> 00:23:39,378
What are you going on about, Aidan?
I'm fucking busy here!
434
00:23:39,379 --> 00:23:41,338
Is your phone broke?
435
00:23:41,339 --> 00:23:43,938
Look, can we talk about this later?
436
00:23:43,939 --> 00:23:47,818
Sorry I'm late. Traffic were a bitch.
437
00:23:47,819 --> 00:23:51,818
Traffic?
438
00:23:59,819 --> 00:24:01,258
I'd pay you double next month.
439
00:24:01,259 --> 00:24:03,298
I'm not here about that.
440
00:24:03,299 --> 00:24:05,818
It's about your cat, Tiger?
441
00:24:05,819 --> 00:24:08,338
Charity!
442
00:24:08,339 --> 00:24:12,338
Charity, this man's found Tiger.
443
00:24:12,499 --> 00:24:14,698
There you go!
444
00:24:14,699 --> 00:24:15,618
What's...?
445
00:24:15,619 --> 00:24:19,178
That's Tiger.
446
00:24:19,179 --> 00:24:20,058
What's this, some kind of...?
447
00:24:20,059 --> 00:24:23,578
Come on, I'm sure it's him.
448
00:24:23,579 --> 00:24:25,578
A van got him... I think, you know,
449
00:24:25,579 --> 00:24:28,138
judging by the tyre marks
across his back.
450
00:24:28,139 --> 00:24:31,618
I think that's his back, anyway...
Fuck it!
451
00:24:31,619 --> 00:24:34,418
What about my 50 quid?
452
00:24:34,419 --> 00:24:35,658
In your own time, mate.
453
00:24:35,659 --> 00:24:37,538
Yeah, hang on, give us a minute.
454
00:24:37,539 --> 00:24:39,098
Great.
455
00:24:39,099 --> 00:24:43,098
Erm... Fries, sorry, just...
456
00:24:43,139 --> 00:24:44,258
Is that large fries, is it?
457
00:24:44,259 --> 00:24:47,578
Yes, mate.
458
00:24:47,579 --> 00:24:50,138
There you go,
one Mighty Mountain Meal.
459
00:24:50,139 --> 00:24:51,898
Sorry for the wait, I'm a bit...
460
00:24:51,899 --> 00:24:54,338
Well... Hey!
461
00:24:54,339 --> 00:24:56,698
We were just finishing
our fag break.
462
00:24:56,699 --> 00:24:57,738
Another one?!
463
00:24:57,739 --> 00:25:01,738
Well, you said we could
whenever we wanted to.
464
00:25:01,779 --> 00:25:03,778
Right, no more breaks
until further notice.
465
00:25:03,779 --> 00:25:06,698
I've got paperwork to do,
you've got targets to hit.
466
00:25:06,699 --> 00:25:09,018
We'll never hit that.
And why do you care, anyway?
467
00:25:09,019 --> 00:25:10,258
Just do what I say, I'm the manager.
468
00:25:10,259 --> 00:25:14,218
Line manager,
not that you've earned it or owt.
469
00:25:14,219 --> 00:25:16,258
Right, that's it. A verbal warning.
470
00:25:16,259 --> 00:25:17,298
That's not fair!
471
00:25:17,299 --> 00:25:21,298
Well, life isn't fair, sweetheart.
Come on, back to work, all of you!
472
00:25:27,219 --> 00:25:29,818
You are as free to be
whoever you want to be.
473
00:25:29,819 --> 00:25:32,578
Oh! What in the name of holy shit
is that?!
474
00:25:32,579 --> 00:25:34,538
It's a cat. It's dead now.
475
00:25:34,539 --> 00:25:37,338
No shit, CSI Chatsworth!
You can't leave that there.
476
00:25:37,339 --> 00:25:38,178
Why not?
477
00:25:38,179 --> 00:25:39,578
Because it's disrespectful.
478
00:25:39,579 --> 00:25:40,978
All right, fair enough.
479
00:25:40,979 --> 00:25:44,018
I'll give the Pope a bell, sort out
a full-on fucking Mass for it!
480
00:25:44,019 --> 00:25:45,978
It's dead! Get over it, fuck's sake.
481
00:25:45,979 --> 00:25:49,978
You can't leave that there.
Do something with it.
482
00:25:50,539 --> 00:25:54,178
Something respectful, eh?
483
00:25:54,179 --> 00:25:58,178
Creativity, beauty
and wonder are free,
484
00:25:59,459 --> 00:26:01,258
just like you.
485
00:26:02,739 --> 00:26:04,858
All right? What's that noise?
486
00:26:04,859 --> 00:26:05,898
What noise?
487
00:26:05,899 --> 00:26:07,018
The banging.
488
00:26:07,019 --> 00:26:08,858
It's Connor.
489
00:26:08,859 --> 00:26:11,498
I locked him in the wardrobe.
I'm being a firm parent.
490
00:26:11,499 --> 00:26:15,498
Can't you see how happy
it's making us all?
491
00:26:18,139 --> 00:26:22,138
'Something respectful, yeah?'
492
00:26:43,619 --> 00:26:47,218
Excuse me? Excuse me!
493
00:26:47,219 --> 00:26:49,218
Oh.
494
00:26:49,219 --> 00:26:51,858
Oi! Where are you lot going?
495
00:26:51,859 --> 00:26:52,658
Pub.
496
00:26:52,659 --> 00:26:53,818
What, all of you?
497
00:26:53,819 --> 00:26:55,458
You did the rota.
498
00:26:55,459 --> 00:26:57,058
No, you have to stay.
499
00:26:57,059 --> 00:26:58,818
Don't have to.
500
00:26:58,819 --> 00:27:02,818
You're still in your trial period,
you're on a verbal warning already.
501
00:27:03,219 --> 00:27:06,018
Leave now and I'll sack you.
502
00:27:06,019 --> 00:27:10,018
Stay or go, it's up to you.
503
00:27:13,699 --> 00:27:15,538
'Children thrive on routine,
504
00:27:15,539 --> 00:27:18,538
'but routine doesn't have to inhibit,
505
00:27:18,539 --> 00:27:21,458
'doesn't have to be a straitjacket.
506
00:27:21,459 --> 00:27:23,178
'A good routine can liberate a child.
507
00:27:23,179 --> 00:27:26,898
'Let the child establish
his or her own routine.
508
00:27:26,899 --> 00:27:30,898
'Allow them to take control
of their day.'
509
00:27:31,739 --> 00:27:33,058
Cilla?
510
00:27:33,059 --> 00:27:34,698
Cilla?
511
00:27:34,699 --> 00:27:37,978
Cilla?!
512
00:27:37,979 --> 00:27:39,338
Cilla!
513
00:27:39,339 --> 00:27:41,858
Cilla!
514
00:27:41,859 --> 00:27:45,858
CILLA!
515
00:27:50,379 --> 00:27:51,418
Cilla!
516
00:27:52,419 --> 00:27:53,778
Cilla!
517
00:27:53,779 --> 00:27:57,778
Cilla!
518
00:27:57,819 --> 00:28:01,818
Oh! Cilla!
519
00:28:01,979 --> 00:28:04,418
Oh! Hiya!
520
00:28:04,419 --> 00:28:08,418
Oh, hello, gorgeous! Oh!
521
00:28:10,179 --> 00:28:13,018
We should've locked up by now!
We're well past closing time.
522
00:28:13,019 --> 00:28:17,018
I'm the manager. I'll decide when
it's time to lock up, all right?
523
00:28:19,499 --> 00:28:23,498
All right?
524
00:28:25,219 --> 00:28:28,178
Shouldn't you be doing something?
525
00:28:28,179 --> 00:28:31,178
Necking cheeky Vimtos
and rimming Akeeba?
526
00:28:31,179 --> 00:28:34,658
Work-wise.
527
00:28:34,659 --> 00:28:37,378
Right, go on... What?
528
00:28:37,379 --> 00:28:38,898
What?
529
00:28:38,899 --> 00:28:42,098
Just that thing you said about
how all management are wankers.
530
00:28:42,099 --> 00:28:43,698
You think I'm a wanker?
With a plastic star.
531
00:28:43,699 --> 00:28:45,418
Yeah, one more than you.
532
00:28:45,419 --> 00:28:48,378
Get the fuck dow... ooow!
533
00:28:48,379 --> 00:28:51,858
I said, on the fucking floor now!
534
00:28:51,859 --> 00:28:52,458
Get off me!
535
00:28:52,459 --> 00:28:55,618
Please don't!
No, I've got kids, don't!
536
00:28:55,619 --> 00:28:56,498
Frank?
537
00:28:56,499 --> 00:28:58,138
I've got family!
538
00:28:58,139 --> 00:29:00,698
Frank Gallagher?!
539
00:29:00,699 --> 00:29:04,378
Fucking hell!
540
00:29:04,379 --> 00:29:05,658
Shawy?
541
00:29:05,659 --> 00:29:07,058
Fucking hell!
542
00:29:07,059 --> 00:29:08,818
How are you doing, mate?
543
00:29:08,819 --> 00:29:11,298
Yeah, all right... you know. You?
544
00:29:11,299 --> 00:29:15,298
Yeah, yeah, fine.
545
00:29:16,699 --> 00:29:18,538
You work here, then?
546
00:29:18,539 --> 00:29:19,698
I'm the manager.
547
00:29:19,699 --> 00:29:21,498
Line manager! Shut it!
548
00:29:21,499 --> 00:29:24,178
Nice one! Yeah.
549
00:29:24,179 --> 00:29:27,458
I'm dead sorry, mate, but I'm
still going to have to rob the gaff.
550
00:29:27,459 --> 00:29:29,658
You understand, don't ya?
551
00:29:29,659 --> 00:29:33,658
Oh... yeah.
552
00:29:47,899 --> 00:29:50,658
Hey! Marty about?
553
00:29:50,659 --> 00:29:54,098
I don't know.
554
00:29:54,099 --> 00:29:55,538
Got you some chippies.
555
00:29:55,539 --> 00:29:57,418
Want a medal?
556
00:29:57,419 --> 00:29:59,138
Aidan!
557
00:29:59,139 --> 00:30:01,618
I'm sorry, I should... Aidan!
558
00:30:01,619 --> 00:30:05,618
Look, we'll do something nice
tomorrow. Anything you fancy.
559
00:30:06,019 --> 00:30:07,618
Fucking?
560
00:30:07,619 --> 00:30:09,658
Yeah, I tell you what, let's fuck.
561
00:30:09,659 --> 00:30:13,658
I've got a bit of money stashed,
let me know how much you charge.
562
00:30:14,259 --> 00:30:16,578
I'm in deep to a loan shark,
563
00:30:16,579 --> 00:30:18,778
our Amy's getting married next month
again,
564
00:30:18,779 --> 00:30:21,098
and Tony needs one of them
motorised wheelchairs.
565
00:30:21,099 --> 00:30:22,498
Paralysed himself tombstoning.
566
00:30:22,499 --> 00:30:24,618
Yeah, I heard.
567
00:30:24,619 --> 00:30:26,418
Fucking knobhead!
568
00:30:26,419 --> 00:30:28,098
Times are hard.
569
00:30:28,099 --> 00:30:31,138
You've done all right for yourself,
haven't you? Manager?
570
00:30:31,139 --> 00:30:34,858
A proper manager would have
locked up, emptied the tills,
571
00:30:34,859 --> 00:30:36,298
put the takings in the safe...
572
00:30:36,299 --> 00:30:36,858
Yeah, yeah...
573
00:30:36,859 --> 00:30:40,538
Shall I clip her?
Make it like an accident?
574
00:30:40,539 --> 00:30:44,258
It's a joke.
575
00:30:44,259 --> 00:30:47,658
Hey, any jobs going here?
You could put in a word for us.
576
00:30:47,659 --> 00:30:48,658
For you?
577
00:30:48,659 --> 00:30:52,498
You could vouch for us,
my trustworthiness and that.
578
00:30:52,499 --> 00:30:56,218
Well, to be honest,
I don't think it's going to happen,
579
00:30:56,219 --> 00:30:57,578
not with you robbing us and that.
580
00:30:57,579 --> 00:30:59,058
Right.
581
00:30:59,059 --> 00:31:03,058
But, if you didn't,
if you left without that,
582
00:31:03,179 --> 00:31:07,178
then, you know,
I could... see what I can do.
583
00:31:08,059 --> 00:31:11,418
A bag of money versus a lifetime of
minimum wages working for wankers.
584
00:31:11,419 --> 00:31:14,618
Well, it pays time and half
at weekends,
585
00:31:14,619 --> 00:31:17,778
double on bank holidays
with a day off in lieu.
586
00:31:17,779 --> 00:31:19,058
You've convinced me!
587
00:31:19,059 --> 00:31:23,058
Oh, please don't, you're going to
get caught. There's CCTV cameras.
588
00:31:26,459 --> 00:31:28,978
Eyewitnesses.
589
00:31:28,979 --> 00:31:31,098
You wouldn't shop me, though,
would you?
590
00:31:31,099 --> 00:31:33,058
Well, he is the manager.
591
00:31:33,059 --> 00:31:37,058
You're not one of them, Frank.
You're one of us.
592
00:31:37,819 --> 00:31:38,858
I'm sorry, mate, I...
593
00:31:38,859 --> 00:31:40,178
Don't.
594
00:31:40,179 --> 00:31:44,178
I'm desperate.
595
00:31:52,979 --> 00:31:54,738
I'll phone the police.
596
00:31:54,739 --> 00:31:57,141
No. It's my call.
597
00:32:07,921 --> 00:32:09,600
What the fuck is going on?
598
00:32:09,601 --> 00:32:13,180
Spinach soup - super food,
apparently.
599
00:32:13,184 --> 00:32:16,023
Are you pissed? It's the middle
of the fucking night!
600
00:32:16,063 --> 00:32:20,022
Cilla's decided she wants to get up.
601
00:32:20,023 --> 00:32:22,182
Tell her it's not time to get up,
like you always do.
602
00:32:22,183 --> 00:32:24,302
I can't!
603
00:32:24,303 --> 00:32:28,302
I'm giving her
"her own personal freedom,"
604
00:32:28,863 --> 00:32:32,622
she'll decide her own
sleep patterns.
605
00:32:32,623 --> 00:32:36,022
I can hear words coming out your
mouth, but they don't make any sense.
606
00:32:36,023 --> 00:32:37,422
I'm just trying to be a good mum!
607
00:32:37,423 --> 00:32:39,102
You are a good mum.
608
00:32:39,103 --> 00:32:40,982
I'm not, I never have been!
609
00:32:40,983 --> 00:32:44,982
And that little girl's
my last chance at it!
610
00:32:51,583 --> 00:32:55,582
I think you're a good mum.
611
00:32:58,823 --> 00:33:02,142
Look, I, I...
612
00:33:02,143 --> 00:33:05,062
What the fuck!
613
00:33:05,063 --> 00:33:07,022
Here's the branch manager.
614
00:33:07,023 --> 00:33:10,182
Look, I didn't want to bother you
late last night.
615
00:33:10,183 --> 00:33:14,182
We got turned over. I really wanted
to fight back but...
616
00:33:15,463 --> 00:33:19,462
they had guns!
617
00:33:19,903 --> 00:33:23,902
I didn't get a chance to get the
night safe with the paperwork
and the...
618
00:33:24,023 --> 00:33:27,822
turn the CCTV cameras on and...
619
00:33:27,823 --> 00:33:30,262
Why are the police here?
What's happened?
620
00:33:30,263 --> 00:33:34,262
Absolute fucking disaster.
621
00:33:35,663 --> 00:33:37,902
"Allow the child
to set his own parameters
622
00:33:37,903 --> 00:33:40,062
"within the boundaries
laid down by the parents."
623
00:33:40,063 --> 00:33:42,422
All right, that makes sense, kind of.
624
00:33:42,423 --> 00:33:43,742
So what stage is Connor at now?
625
00:33:43,743 --> 00:33:47,462
Stage five, but to be honest I think
we got stuck about stage two.
626
00:33:47,463 --> 00:33:50,302
"Failure to progress between stages
is a result of
627
00:33:50,303 --> 00:33:52,502
"a lack of parental reinforcement."
628
00:33:52,503 --> 00:33:53,782
She's got it covered.
629
00:33:53,783 --> 00:33:55,422
Yeah, there's some good stuff
in here.
630
00:33:55,423 --> 00:33:56,702
Is that right?
631
00:33:56,703 --> 00:33:57,742
"Every child has the potential
for greatness" and...
632
00:33:57,743 --> 00:33:59,742
Where's the chapter about drawing
cocks on the wall?
633
00:33:59,743 --> 00:34:00,822
Sorry?
634
00:34:00,823 --> 00:34:03,622
Well, what does the professor say
about drawing cocks on the wall?
635
00:34:03,623 --> 00:34:05,302
Mmm...
636
00:34:05,303 --> 00:34:08,942
"If you get stuck, go back to
the previous chapter."
637
00:34:08,943 --> 00:34:12,502
So, book after book,
you read it to the letter.
638
00:34:12,503 --> 00:34:15,102
And if it doesn't work,
it's not the book's fault,
639
00:34:15,103 --> 00:34:17,142
it's your fault
for not doing it properly.
640
00:34:17,143 --> 00:34:20,142
It's a scam. It's fucking foolproof!
641
00:34:20,143 --> 00:34:21,462
So, I don't have to finish the book?
642
00:34:21,463 --> 00:34:25,462
It's bollocks!
We have got a great kid, he's happy.
643
00:34:25,663 --> 00:34:28,742
He draws a few cocks on the wall,
so what?
644
00:34:28,743 --> 00:34:31,582
Thank fuck for that.
645
00:34:31,583 --> 00:34:34,502
That one's not actually bad.
646
00:34:34,503 --> 00:34:36,182
Attention to detail.
647
00:34:36,183 --> 00:34:37,342
Hm.
648
00:34:37,343 --> 00:34:38,062
Proportion.
649
00:34:38,063 --> 00:34:39,422
Mm-hm.
650
00:34:39,423 --> 00:34:41,342
Our son is a fucking genius.
651
00:34:41,343 --> 00:34:44,102
Hmm, is he!
652
00:34:44,103 --> 00:34:45,662
Well, I fucked a 15-year-old.
653
00:34:45,663 --> 00:34:49,422
He was dead nervy, it was all over
in about 30 seconds.
654
00:34:49,423 --> 00:34:51,022
And how old were you?
655
00:34:51,023 --> 00:34:53,062
14.
656
00:34:53,063 --> 00:34:55,702
Get it over and done with,
he'll be that embarrassed,
657
00:34:55,703 --> 00:34:56,982
he won't bother you again.
658
00:34:56,983 --> 00:34:59,822
If you're worried about diddling me
out of my commission...
659
00:34:59,823 --> 00:35:03,822
I'm not. Oh, I don't know,
I can't just fuck Aidan.
660
00:35:04,343 --> 00:35:06,422
Why not?
661
00:35:06,423 --> 00:35:08,302
Apart from it being
register-signing-illegal?
662
00:35:08,303 --> 00:35:11,462
It just wouldn't be right,
it'd be like incest or summat!
663
00:35:11,463 --> 00:35:15,462
He's not your blood.
Fuck him and move on.
664
00:35:17,943 --> 00:35:21,942
Put me back on flipping burgers
and frying... fries.
665
00:35:21,943 --> 00:35:25,342
I want to get the Trafford Centre
outlet and I always get what I want,
666
00:35:25,343 --> 00:35:27,622
and whoever helps me achieve my
dream is going to end up
667
00:35:27,623 --> 00:35:28,982
running this place.
668
00:35:28,983 --> 00:35:32,262
Whoever helps you will end up
running this place?
669
00:35:32,263 --> 00:35:36,262
That's what I said.
670
00:35:37,383 --> 00:35:40,382
How we going to make target now?
671
00:35:40,383 --> 00:35:44,382
Cheryl, change of plan.
672
00:35:44,423 --> 00:35:47,582
What?
673
00:35:47,583 --> 00:35:51,582
Oh, don't.
I've tried to get shot of it.
674
00:35:52,063 --> 00:35:55,262
The only way I can get back on
the floor is by hitting the targets
675
00:35:55,263 --> 00:35:57,182
and getting fuckhead
to the Trafford Centre.
676
00:35:57,183 --> 00:36:00,382
That's never going to happen.
677
00:36:00,383 --> 00:36:04,382
That's a very negative attitude.
678
00:36:08,023 --> 00:36:09,062
Need a word with you.
679
00:36:09,063 --> 00:36:12,942
I'll give you more than a word,
sweetheart.
680
00:36:12,943 --> 00:36:16,342
Now.
681
00:36:16,343 --> 00:36:19,342
Are we going to... fuck?
682
00:36:19,343 --> 00:36:22,062
You better believe it, boy.
683
00:36:22,063 --> 00:36:26,062
If you're up to it.
684
00:36:38,423 --> 00:36:39,462
Get undressed. Now!
685
00:36:39,463 --> 00:36:43,462
What, now?
686
00:36:44,463 --> 00:36:48,462
Well, come on,
what're you waiting for?
687
00:36:48,823 --> 00:36:51,022
Come on, what's the matter with you?
688
00:36:51,023 --> 00:36:55,022
No, Kelly, stop!
689
00:36:55,143 --> 00:36:56,622
I don't want this.
690
00:36:56,623 --> 00:37:00,622
Well, what do you want?
691
00:37:04,223 --> 00:37:08,222
I want my mum!
692
00:37:15,343 --> 00:37:17,262
Mimi?
693
00:37:17,263 --> 00:37:21,262
Ssh! Cilla's asleep,
said she wanted to go night-nights.
694
00:37:21,503 --> 00:37:24,382
Can't disturb her...
695
00:37:24,383 --> 00:37:28,382
This isn't right.
696
00:37:28,983 --> 00:37:31,942
It's in the book, Karen,
so it must be right.
697
00:37:31,943 --> 00:37:35,942
I knew nothing before this book,
nothing at all.
698
00:37:35,943 --> 00:37:37,702
Mimi...
699
00:37:37,703 --> 00:37:38,742
Keep it down.
700
00:37:38,743 --> 00:37:42,182
I don't want Cilla hearing conflict.
701
00:37:42,183 --> 00:37:46,182
"A butterfly can't float
in a war zone."
702
00:37:46,583 --> 00:37:50,582
Mimi. You live on the Chatsworth!
703
00:37:51,223 --> 00:37:53,982
You're a drug dealing,
loan-sharking, kneecapping Maguire.
704
00:37:53,983 --> 00:37:57,982
There is no spring meadow
for a fucking butterfly to float!
705
00:37:57,983 --> 00:38:00,942
This is an instruction manual
on how to live your life,
706
00:38:00,943 --> 00:38:04,942
that's all. It's just ideas
and most of them are bollocks!
707
00:38:05,303 --> 00:38:09,022
No, Karen, right.
708
00:38:09,023 --> 00:38:11,462
I nearly lost Cilla yesterday.
709
00:38:11,463 --> 00:38:15,462
I was reading the book, in the park,
I looked up and she'd gone.
710
00:38:17,743 --> 00:38:20,662
Now, I could've lost my mind,
711
00:38:20,663 --> 00:38:23,822
thinking she'd been snatched by
some paedo, but...
712
00:38:23,823 --> 00:38:25,542
Or, if you hadn't been reading
the book,
713
00:38:25,543 --> 00:38:27,582
and doing what you usually do
with Cilla,
714
00:38:27,583 --> 00:38:29,702
watching her, playing with her,
715
00:38:29,703 --> 00:38:32,862
being with her, none of it
would've happened, full stop.
716
00:38:32,863 --> 00:38:36,782
You've been a mother seven times
over. You know what you're doing.
717
00:38:36,783 --> 00:38:37,822
Jamie doesn't think so.
718
00:38:37,823 --> 00:38:41,822
Course he does.
Look, he was just looking after me.
719
00:38:41,903 --> 00:38:44,142
He's turned out all right,
hasn't he?
720
00:38:44,143 --> 00:38:47,342
Look, so what, you might not be
the greatest mother in the world.
721
00:38:47,343 --> 00:38:51,342
Who is? We're all winging it,
aren't we?
722
00:38:54,463 --> 00:38:57,182
I'm not your mum.
723
00:38:57,183 --> 00:38:58,902
No.
724
00:38:58,903 --> 00:39:02,902
So, when I let you down, you thought
you'd put me in my place.
725
00:39:03,983 --> 00:39:07,982
Just some prozzie who crashes here.
726
00:39:09,103 --> 00:39:10,782
Not really us, though, is it?
727
00:39:10,783 --> 00:39:14,782
Mother and son or fuck buddies?
728
00:39:15,143 --> 00:39:19,142
We've got something different.
729
00:39:21,703 --> 00:39:25,702
I can't promise that I'll be here
for you, not all the time.
730
00:39:26,943 --> 00:39:30,942
I've got work, Marty, mates,
got a million other things.
731
00:39:32,863 --> 00:39:35,102
But I'll try.
732
00:39:35,103 --> 00:39:39,102
I'll try harder to be better.
733
00:39:39,943 --> 00:39:42,702
Hey! That's a big thing for me
to say.
734
00:39:42,703 --> 00:39:44,942
Nod.
735
00:39:44,943 --> 00:39:48,942
Say thank you.
736
00:39:49,303 --> 00:39:51,262
But you've got to try an' all.
737
00:39:51,263 --> 00:39:54,262
You've got to start seeing me
as something other than
738
00:39:54,263 --> 00:39:58,262
just a prostitute.
739
00:39:59,583 --> 00:40:03,582
Now come on,
let's go get twatted at The Jockey.
740
00:40:04,623 --> 00:40:07,902
You wouldn't really have done it,
would you? Shagged me?
741
00:40:07,903 --> 00:40:11,902
You'll never know, will ya?
742
00:41:10,303 --> 00:41:12,502
What're you doing, Shane?
The house stinks.
743
00:41:12,503 --> 00:41:16,022
You're going to be the first
to see it.
744
00:41:16,023 --> 00:41:19,142
See what?
745
00:41:34,543 --> 00:41:38,542
Little bit of atmos.
746
00:41:39,583 --> 00:41:43,582
What do you think?
747
00:41:43,623 --> 00:41:47,622
City's 1970 European
Cup Winners' Cup squad.
748
00:41:47,983 --> 00:41:51,982
Franny Lee, Neil Young,
little Colin Bell.
749
00:41:53,703 --> 00:41:57,702
I'm going to sell 'em to the
National Football Museum in town.
750
00:42:02,223 --> 00:42:06,142
Colour that chart in, add a zero
to the figures and then bingo...
751
00:42:06,143 --> 00:42:08,582
you're away.
752
00:42:08,583 --> 00:42:12,582
Well, nobody knows exactly how much
money was robbed!
753
00:42:15,783 --> 00:42:19,782
Head office'll think I've hit
targets, insurance pays out,
754
00:42:19,783 --> 00:42:22,102
and I get to the Trafford Centre.
755
00:42:22,103 --> 00:42:23,902
Everybody's happy.
756
00:42:23,903 --> 00:42:24,662
Everything OK?
757
00:42:24,663 --> 00:42:28,662
Yeah! We've just had a little chat,
me and Cheryl!
758
00:42:30,223 --> 00:42:33,342
She's a pretty good sounding board
for a couple of ideas of mine.
759
00:42:33,343 --> 00:42:36,982
And, it looks like...
760
00:42:36,983 --> 00:42:39,662
She's on her way to running
this place.
761
00:42:39,663 --> 00:42:41,382
Really?
762
00:42:41,383 --> 00:42:44,022
Yeah. I'm sorry, Frank.
763
00:42:44,023 --> 00:42:48,022
Come on, Cheryl. Paperwork to do!
764
00:42:58,503 --> 00:43:02,502
Cheer up. Have some pakora.
765
00:43:09,743 --> 00:43:13,742
Hang on - we don't sell pakora.
766
00:43:16,503 --> 00:43:20,142
Peace offering?
767
00:43:20,143 --> 00:43:24,142
Karen says I was a bit hard on you,
and she's right. I'm sorry.
768
00:43:25,143 --> 00:43:27,902
I'm sorry, an' all.
769
00:43:27,903 --> 00:43:30,102
The second you think you know
all the answers
770
00:43:30,103 --> 00:43:34,102
is the second you fuck it all up.
771
00:43:34,863 --> 00:43:37,942
She does a good job cos she's scared
of getting it wrong.
772
00:43:37,943 --> 00:43:40,942
Yeah, well, she's usually bang on.
773
00:43:40,943 --> 00:43:44,342
Whoa, whoa! There's no need
for that! It'll fit through.
774
00:43:44,343 --> 00:43:46,582
Flip it on its side...
775
00:43:46,583 --> 00:43:50,182
You were right.
It is the wrong colour.
776
00:43:50,183 --> 00:43:53,182
99 times out of 100, anyway.
777
00:43:53,183 --> 00:43:55,302
We know parenting's hard.
778
00:43:55,303 --> 00:43:58,382
The wee man kicks off every time
I try to brush his teeth.
779
00:43:58,383 --> 00:44:01,422
He'll thank you for it one day.
780
00:44:01,423 --> 00:44:05,422
Yeah well, I never thanked you.
So...
781
00:44:07,903 --> 00:44:10,622
Thank you.
782
00:44:10,623 --> 00:44:12,582
For brushing your teeth?
783
00:44:12,583 --> 00:44:14,662
Yeah, Mam, for brushing me teeth.
784
00:44:14,663 --> 00:44:17,742
Don't know what you're thanking me
for, they're green and manky.
785
00:44:17,743 --> 00:44:18,982
Yeah, well, that's your fault
786
00:44:18,983 --> 00:44:20,942
for buying me sweets
after visiting the dentist.
787
00:44:20,943 --> 00:44:23,342
Er, a reward for being brave.
788
00:44:23,343 --> 00:44:25,382
Er, mixed messages.
789
00:44:25,383 --> 00:44:26,702
That's my fucking cat.
790
00:44:26,703 --> 00:44:28,862
Was your cat. Didn't want it,
did ya?
791
00:44:28,863 --> 00:44:31,222
Er, that was years ago.
792
00:44:31,223 --> 00:44:33,462
Stuff we didn't know
that we know now!
793
00:44:33,463 --> 00:44:35,022
Like sugar rots your fucking
teeth, Mam!
794
00:44:35,023 --> 00:44:36,822
You had one fucking chance!
795
00:44:36,823 --> 00:44:39,902
I'm not a fucking dentist!
It's not fucking rocket science, is it?!
796
00:44:39,903 --> 00:44:41,862
You were a little twat
when you were little!
797
00:44:41,863 --> 00:44:43,382
I was four!
798
00:44:43,383 --> 00:44:46,902
'Like it or not, we're always
learning something.
799
00:44:46,903 --> 00:44:49,542
'Someone wants to teach you a lesson
800
00:44:49,543 --> 00:44:51,582
'and put you on a steep
learning curve,
801
00:44:51,583 --> 00:44:55,182
'but one day you've got to ask -
when's the fucking exam?
802
00:44:55,183 --> 00:44:58,382
'I'm sick of being taught lessons -
I just want to be!
803
00:44:58,383 --> 00:45:00,902
'That's all - be!
804
00:45:00,903 --> 00:45:04,902
'My name is Katherine Harmonica Joy
Mimi Tutton, and I'm a fuck up.
805
00:45:06,903 --> 00:45:10,902
'But so are you and you and you.
806
00:45:11,183 --> 00:45:13,622
'We're all fucked up,
none of us are perfect,
807
00:45:13,623 --> 00:45:15,062
'and none of us know everything,
808
00:45:15,063 --> 00:45:18,222
'and when we all finally
fucking learn that
809
00:45:18,223 --> 00:45:21,742
'as our big, fuck-off, last lesson,
810
00:45:21,743 --> 00:45:25,742
'we'll all be able to get on
living life and have a great time!'
811
00:45:26,383 --> 00:45:28,662
She's been investing it
in kinky boots.
812
00:45:28,663 --> 00:45:29,502
Gloria, we've got a house guest.
813
00:45:29,503 --> 00:45:30,662
Gloria.
814
00:45:30,663 --> 00:45:32,582
That was your mother?
815
00:45:32,583 --> 00:45:34,262
The money. I spent it!
816
00:45:34,263 --> 00:45:36,062
Three and a half grand?!
817
00:45:36,063 --> 00:45:37,462
I've bought something.
818
00:45:37,463 --> 00:45:40,302
It's hard. Very hard. Suck me cock!
819
00:45:40,303 --> 00:45:42,342
Tickle me balls! No, leave!
820
00:45:42,343 --> 00:45:43,102
This is...
821
00:45:43,103 --> 00:45:44,462
Brenda.
822
00:45:44,463 --> 00:45:46,142
Brenda is Lillian's slave.
823
00:45:46,143 --> 00:45:47,942
You two should think of getting one.
824
00:45:47,943 --> 00:45:49,102
I found a lump.
825
00:45:49,103 --> 00:45:50,582
Which one is it?
826
00:45:50,596 --> 00:46:30,510
Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells
http://UKsubtitles.ru.
827
00:46:32,223 --> 00:46:34,742
So no news from the
National Football Museum, then?
828
00:46:34,743 --> 00:46:36,462
No, not a sausage, funnily enough.
829
00:46:36,463 --> 00:46:38,542
You know what they say, though,
don't you?
830
00:46:38,543 --> 00:46:42,262
One man's loss
is another man's profit.
831
00:46:42,263 --> 00:46:45,822
You bastard.
832
00:46:45,823 --> 00:46:52,022
Five pound, your Museum Of Pop,
five pound!
61049
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