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I've never really been the kind of person to

open up to anyone...

And it was really hard after what happened at school.

I developed feelings for a girl.

And, word got out to the girl through a friend of mine.

And, the girl said that I was bullying her.

And, the school found out,

and I didn't feel like I could stand up for myself.

So I felt really scared,

and I didn't want to tell my parents.

Like, I didn't know how to tell them

without coming out to them,

'cause I wasn't ready to do that yet.

The school asked me, "We can either tell your parents

or suspend you," and I just told the school

straight up to suspend me,

'cause I didn't want my parents to know yet.

And, they called my mom anyways,

and told my mom the whole story

while I was in the other room.

There are days where I'm, you know,

big, tough, and strong,

and I come home, when I'm in my bed,

and I kind of go- I just...

want to go back...

like, seven years or something and just...

be a kid again.

And I remember saying, like,

I've always wanted to grow up,

but now that I'm growing up...

I want to go back and be a kid again.

I don't think I have been in a space

where it's all queer people.

Not yet, at least.

What shoes are you gonna bring?

You gotta have something for hiking.

It just says "outdoor footwear".

Insect repellent.

Five shirts?

Yeah, I would take five, just to so you have extra.

Setting off, it's about 7AM.

We're gonna go get some fuel, we're gonna hit the road.

And we are on our way to Camp fYrefly 2022.

Yeah, hell yeah.

In southern Alberta, there is a really strong religious and

socially conservative community.

So, being queer, it's not often you get to see

someone who is like yourself.

- A hawk. - Oh, yeah.

To have camp,

it's a time to let that weight off your shoulders.

I am so excited.

Just to be surrounded by people who

I don't have to explain myself to.

A camp like this, it's important because

I get to see people who are like me,

and I know that I'm not alone.

Okay...

Mwah!

I'm a trans girl.

And, I've been out for about a year.

I'm just...

I'm just a goth chick.

I was, I think I was 8.

I think that's the first time I actually

told everybody I felt like a girl.

And that was only my family.

My name is Ren. My pronouns are

he/they, and I am trans masc non-binary.

Um, I think the biggest part is

meeting other people like me 'cause...

I don't get to see that every day.

It was a bit of a process.

At first I thought I was a lesbian,

which turned out to be vastly incorrect.

I was a transphobe, a homophobe.

I was like a stereotypical high school bully because

I didn't want to accept who I was...

because I was scared.

My parents think I'm going to this camp because

I'm bisexual, and I am.

But I identify as a trans man,

or just a man.

But my parents don't know,

and I haven't told them or anything.

Hand me that screwdriver.

Mark the drywall where the little anchor has to go.

Yeah.

It's such a big conversation to explain...

that it just feels like it's easier to just

not talk about it.

Hanging some sort of Ikea shelf that she got somewhere.

My parents misgender me, but it's not a situation

where I can be mad at them because...

I haven't given them anything, so they stick with-

my parents stick with what they know.

I have no idea what the shelf is for.

- Whatever she decides- - Trinkets.

Trinkets.

Like, I'm more, I'm more close with my mom.

But, my dad's always been...

he's like a tough dad, man kind of thing.

Oh, come here, have fun.

I'm just trying not to read the back of your shirt.

- Yeah... - Kiddo.

Bye. Get out of here.

Have fun, be safe, don't die.

- Yes. Bye... bye. - Bye.

It's a bigger conversation than

I want to have with them...

but, what feels good for me...

just giving me the space to be able to, like,

find out who I am, myself.

Hi, what's your name?

Hi, ah, either Kingston or-

Kingston... Kingston...

At this camp, I hope I don't have to

carry around two identities and two names,

and I'm able to just feel more like myself.

- Hi, nice to meet you. - What's your name?

- Uh, Kingston. - Kingston? Awesome.

Okay, I will be with you in just a second.

Sure.

Uh, can I please ask your name?

- Um, Manessa. - Cool.

- Are you under 18? - Yeah.

Sure.

I'm like a little bit nervous to do this.

But, I'm excited as well.

I'm part of the adoption community because I'm adopted.

And I'm also part of the skateboard community.

At least, I hope.

And then, also the queer community.

And then, the Black community as well.

Maybe put your other hand near Stella's head.

Yeah, like that. There you go.

But I'm one of the only Black kids in my neighbourhood.

I think there's maybe one other family that lives

a little bit over there, but you know,

it can be really hard sometimes.

I brought jorts, and I brought...

my athletic black shorts 'cause they're really nice.

I wore them hiking, and they're nice 'cause

they're not too heavy.

- Yeah, perfect. - Yeah.

Yeah, it would be nice if there were more

Black, queer people like, in Calgary.

It would be nice to see more of that.

- Here we are. - Hell, yeah.

Let's do it.

Yeah, me and the boys have been to camp before,

but last time we were just scrawny little 13,

14-year-olds.

But now we're like on the higher end of the

age spectrum at camp.

I guess you could say we're like the

cool kids on campus now.

This is my first time at camp.

There's a lot of cool people here.

I don't know.

- Yeah. - Definitely.

For sure, yeah.

Could either be a boy or a girl.

I don't really mind either which.

Well, dating hasn't been great,

if I'm gonna be honest, but I think if

I were to ever have a relationship again, then...

I'd pick a, pick better people.

Yeah, it's really nice seeing people from last camp and

meeting all the new people.

Now we're in the big kid cabin.

Now we have to like pay taxes and stuff.

I got an email about taxes just a couple months ago too.

Oh, man.

I'm not even 18 yet, and they're like,

"Hey, what about taxes?"

Oh, no!

This is Ren.

The first time I realized that, oh,

people can be queer, it was just because

I read a book and there was a queer couple in it.

So, I learned as much as I could so that

I could always defend my right to exist.

- Mhm - Oh, that's gonna be fun.

Yeah, they're Wren is W-R-E-N.

- Oh! - Yeah, so...

You can definitely hear the difference when you say it.

I hope you enjoy.

I'm very extroverted so,

I will read your face if maybe I'm a bit too much.

Yeah, we can help you move in.

- Okay. - Cool, see you later.

Okay.

Ah!

I love your hair. How do you style it?

Um, I like 70's style it.

I would like to make some friends...

who are queer, and who can-

I can like talk to things like gender about to.

But, I kept asking my mom, like,

"Hey, what should I do?

I don't know how to talk to people."

And she kept saying, "Oh, make sure

you make eye contact." And I hate doing it.

It makes me uncomfortable,

so I don't understand why it's a necessity.

- I'm Ren. - Nice to meet ya.

Apparently there is more than one Ren,

but the other one is the one with the W.

I'm not the one with the W.

Okay, cool.

Well, welcome to camp.

I can tell by just looking out...

there's a lot of fear.

There's a lot of excitement.

And what I hope is deep in your hearts is a knowledge

that you're gonna be well taken care of.

And the whole goal this week is for us to

help you to create community.

So, welcome, and thanks to all of you

for spending time with us.

Marshall, can we have you come up and speak as well?

Hello, everybody.

Really excited to be back here at camp.

Camp, for me, has always been a place where

I felt I could thrive.

I'm really excited to assist with anything artistic

that you might need help with,

including lip syncing 101.

Thanks for having me.

Okay, thank you, Marshall!

Part of my job here

is to really bring these kids-

who have to think so much about the outside world,

and how they're being perceived-

and get them to just let go, have fun,

and be themselves.

Our job is to get them to be kids again.

Okay, let's do some community camp guidelines.

I feel like the best way to make rules that

we can all agree on, and like

vibe with is to do it together.

So, I think respect privacy is a big one.

Confidentiality is a big one.

If you ever want to pass for anything,

you don't want to do something,

you want to skip the conversation...

you could either touch your left shoulder or say "fiddle".

Well, I think what's unique about these spaces,

especially with Camp fYrefly,

is that we establish those safer space agreements.

So, we know right off the bat that this is gonna be

a safer space for everyone

to express their gender identity.

I don't know what I identify as.

Was a trans man, but then I was like, wait, no.

That's not right either.

And, I think that's one of the big challenges outside of

camp is that they don't necessarily know

what is going to be a safe space for them.

They don't necessarily know if everyone

in the space will be accepting of their identity,

or if they need to hide a bit of it.

Um, so that's what's so special.

Can we say what respect looks like to us?

Any suggestions?

If my hair is unstyled, do not look at me.

If you end up seeing someone from fYrefly,

out in the community, in your city...

try to be casual 'cause not everyone's out,

so instead of being like, "Oh hey,

I know you from gay camp,"

be like, "I think I know you from somewhere."

There is a potential for triggering conversations,

so as a pod, I kind of want us to maybe choose a safe word.

No, that's so unreasonable.

Hm, like, what do you mean by that?

♪ DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO ♪

So, I'm autistic,

and I have quite a few special interests.

♪ DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO ♪

I collect stuffed animals, and also dolls.

If you couldn't tell by my room.

So, this is my craft room.

I make spikes, I customize things.

That's my Rapunzel wig.

I like to make stuff.

If you'll look around you'll see...

doll body parts everywhere.

But that's fine, that's normal.

Um, I came out as a...

non-binary person, and then a trans man,

at like 13.

And, at the time, there were no...

other trans people at my school...

...which meant I had to take a lot of the um, bullying.

I told the school counsellors. They were like,

"Well, maybe you should just be

less open about your identity."

And that hit.

So, I had to drop out.

I don't get gender.

I don't understand any of the social constructs

that come with it.

I don't get why pink is for girls and blue is for boys.

And all that- I've never understood it.

And so, being trans masc and very feminine,

a lot of people may question that,

but I don't get how I'm feminine,

I just wear what I love.

I don't feel like...

I should hide anymore.

I feel like gay people just kind of find each other

and stick together. It's like a magnet thing.

Just shut up.

No, no, I know, I know my magnets.

I... I might be a high school drop out!

But you know your magnets!

I know my magnets.

Community means so many different things,

like a space where I feel, like, at home, and like...

just shared experience is really important.

It's important to have people who are like you around

because...

then you can share experiences,

you can share stories, and they can relate, or...

they can give you advice.

There is, like, a thing when I meet someone

who's just like me.

Like, it's just, we get each other.

We don't have to specifically talk about...

who we are or what we are.

You know, we kind of just get along, and we're like,

okay, let's go have a good time.

I'm Wren. I use he/they pronouns.

I really like cats.

I have three.

I'm, I'm also Ren, but without a 'W'.

Um...

My pronouns are also he/they, somehow.

And...

I, I don't know, man.

- That's perfect. - I don't know what's happening.

Every month, my friends and I re-come out to each other.

All of my friends are gay.

I also want to maybe learn more about the community

that we have here in Alberta.

Like, maybe some more places that I can go to,

to like talk about these things that aren't my

high school GSA that's full of 14-year-olds.

I have nothing against them. They're wonderful, but...

just... more.

Do I get to sit in the tire stump?

- Oh, boy. - Oh...

Oh, boy!

I wonder how many spiders are in that thing.

Isaiah!

Okay, in this bag,

we have pink hair dye and brushes.

You're gonna be so smooth after this is done.

The um, oils in the cream I'm putting on will...

stop the skin from getting dyed.

This is for distressed skin types.

- Same? - Are you distressed?

How do you feel right now as I'm rubbing my-

This feels like a social experiment.

Do you feel less distressed?

Rub the cream on the head.

On my head, not "the" head.

It's my head, excuse me, it's my head.

Thank you very much.

No, there's just a community head that we rub things on.

It's lather time.

Attention, campers.

Today's activities are going to be arts and crafts,

a nature walk, the clothing swap,

archery, and the bonfire later tonight.

And also, a reminder,

dying your hair is not permitted so,

no more hair dying.

Oh, this is archery?

I shouldn't have worn heels, but also, they look nice.

I, I knew I...

I always knew I wasn't a guy.

I never enjoyed being called a guy.

The trans femme community,

we were raised as "men".

Looks like sushi from the back.

We were told all those like...

stupid things about, "boys don't cry."

So, I panicked, and did something bad...

turning to the bullies at school,

because they were all guys.

So, I wanted to know how to be a guy because

I didn't want to accept who I was.

Um...

- Sure. - Great.

Middle schoolers have this incredible ability to tell

even before you can whether or not

you're gay or neurodivergent.

- Does that seem okay? - Yeah.

Woo! Nice job!

Not a bad first shot, you got this!

Um, and they broke me,

badly, a lot.

Like, and none of it was physical,

which almost hurts more.

Jesus.

I, uh, I had problems with, um...

self-hatred.

I had problems with, um...

I had problems with...

wanting to harm myself.

I actively participated in things that I knew

would cause me pain.

Like, one of my favourite games in elementary school

was throw yourself down the hill and do as much

damage to your body as possible.

I have noticed that ever since

I did start transitioning, um...

my anxiety and like stress about everything

has significantly dropped.

Like, I was...

in a very bad, emotional mental state.

And then, I finally realized who I was.

Now I'm not in that state, and it's allowed me to relax.

Yeah...

- There. - Nice!

You call it really bad at archery.

I call it freestyle acupuncture.

I don't have scissors.

So, I'm just gonna tie a really large-

You could probably just chew it off?

- You wanna chew it off? - I can chew it off.

Why didn't we grab scissors?

I actually want to see if he can chew it off.

Oh, easy.

Having trans masc friends, it's very affirming.

Oh, wow, good job.

It's a very specific experience that

very few other people go through.

Ah!

Lovely, smooth moves.

Honestly, it's been way too long.

We need to hang out more often.

I missed you guys a lot.

I think we've grown as individuals quite a bit

since we've last seen each other.

Well, the most notable would definitely be

the years of testosterone.

- Oh, God. Yeah. - Both of us.

Yeah, both of us hadn't even started.

Even back then, you looked like a frat boy.

I did, I had like the sweatpants shorts

and everything.

How do you guys think you've changed, emotionally?

Like, camp was the first time that I ever actually

openly expressed myself as a guy,

and the first time I actually felt comfortable

in any of that.

I know it really helped me going forward because I have

no idea what I would have done without having camp

to even figure anything out.

It would have been even more of a gong show than it was.

What are you considering, like...

down the line?

Well, I want to get a... I want to get my own place.

I want to move. Maybe even come here,

do some counselling.

Without a way to connect with

other trans masc people,

life would be just that bit more...

isolated.

Sorry, that just made me remember a joke

kind of about camp.

Knock-knock?

When I first told my friends about this,

they thought I meant a conversion camp.

Ah, so they were concerned for a bit.

And then, I just told them,

it was an anti- conversion camp.

That works.

Yeah, I mean, it pretty much is.

- Mhm. - Sorry, ah...

It's probably not as funny as I think it is.

Oh, that's so cute.

It's a nice, communal exchange...

where, if you transition and you used to wear this dress,

but you don't anymore, then someone else who will have it.

That's so cool!

This is something you'd wear with Converse in 2002.

Yeah, maybe.

Um, I think this is a purse. These are also swim trunks.

That's underwear.

That's what I feel uncomfortable touching.

- It's just such a cute shirt. - I mean, it stretches.

I mean, maybe.

- What are you guys doing? - Stretching it!

- Ooh! Is that...? - Fishnets.

That's so cool!

I mean, if you get bored you can just chop the feet off...

- Okay, what else? - ...and wear it as a shirt.

Absolutely.

There's gowns in here.

There's full-on gowns. I love gowns.

I want just like a big ole-

One of my friends found a 3-piece suit in here.

I was thinking of wearing a dress to grad,

and this could totally be a good grad dress because, like,

I present more masculine at school...

'cause, like, I feel like...

there's like kind of a disparity between like...

Fem- feminine clothing can be like either feminine

or masculine, you know.

But like, masculine clothing is just masculine.

I like some feminine things, like, or like,

"feminine" things, like makeup,

or cosplaying as female characters,

which lots of people don't understand.

It's like people think that because you are transgender,

you can't like things of different genders,

like, you have to stick in a straight, square box.

I have a thing for turtlenecks.

It's a really pretty turtleneck.

Yeah, it's so nice!

And like, the material's nice too.

And it would look so good with these jeans.

And the hat, oh, my God.

It doesn't make sense to want someone to only like one thing

just because it's been set that way...

when you can like whatever you want,

whether it's masculine or feminine,

whether or not you are masculine or feminine.

Like, I want to look like a cowboy.

I want to date a cowboy.

I want to be a cowboy, all of it.

I want everything related to cowboys.

- I keep coming back to this. - It's really pretty.

- It's so pretty. - Yeah.

Ah, there's binders just over there.

And honestly, whole vibe rainbow one.

I think it's too big for me though.

I have obtained a binder.

- I've also obtained a binder. - Nice.

I, historically, have never been comfortable with the

changes that my body went through during puberty.

I think binding is a really good resource for people

who experience a lot of discomfort and dysphoria

in relation to their chest.

I know I love my binder.

I- it gives me...

a real sense of, like, being myself.

Lots of gender euphoria.

First time I wore it, I'm pretty sure I cried...

'Cause I was just so happy with

the way that my body looked.

Didn't you see that they have rainbow ones?

- I did not. - They have rainbow ones.

They're a size too large for me, but like...

I want to get one for my friend, too.

- They have rainbow whats? - Binders.

I know it's bad to put two binders on...

Extra large though.

...but I kind of want to do it.

And, I know that I have to be careful with it.

After a while of wearing it, your ribs do start to hurt.

So, I know it's not-

it's absolutely not a permanent fix,

and you have to be really careful with it.

But, the binder really boosted

my self-confidence a lot.

Like, wow, I like how my body looks again. That's cool.

I would like, someday,

to be able to get top surgery,

but that's not an option for me at the moment.

I have talked to my mom about it, and...

That that's a no.

That's a no for them while I'm living here.

In all fairness, there's no not-cringe-y way to come out.

It's always cringe-y.

I mean, I feel like it's less cringe-y

when it's an accident.

- You know? - Yeah.

It's like, oops.

I identify as a man.

Ah, but my parents don't know.

They think this camp is just an LGBTQ, like,

safe space, like a camp for all people

of the LGBTQ community, which it is.

But they think I'm just going because I'm bisexual.

I'm gonna come out to my mom in the way that

gives me less conversation.

I didn't even come out as bisexual.

I got outed 'cause my parents searched my phone,

and I was talking about it with a partner at the time.

And I was like...

And I'm sitting at the kitchen table, sobbing,

and I'm like-

And they're like, "Did you think we didn't know?"

And I was like...

Just gender, and just the whole basis of like

who I am...

I prefer to keep it like briefer so,

just keeping brief conversation to let them know

who I am.

I haven't, yet.

It's just because of the way things are normalized,

and the way society is,

it is a big conversation, and it feels like

it has to be a big conversation.

But, um...

It's just like I just want to be able to be who I am

without having to have

a super long conversation about it,

or have an awkward conversation about it because...

it's not a big, huge topic.

It's just me.

Yeah, she's knows it's like a big, queer camp.

But like, she thinks I'm just here 'cause I'm bisexual,

and I was like... - "And".

"There's something you don't know." Yes!

"And..." I was like...

She was just like, "How's your first day been?"

And then, like a smiley face emoji.

So, I'm just gonna say, "Good, I came out as trans."

Smiley face emoji. I was like-

And she's probably gonna be like, "What?"

Yeah, it's just chilling.

Your mom thinks you're typing this really long paragraph.

She's like, "Oh, my gosh!"

Do it, do it, do it!

- Alright... - Do it, do it!

- You got it. - Yeah.

Alright... alright, alright, alright!

Done!

- Wait. Did it go through? - Let's check.

Yes.

Oh, my God.

Okay, how do you feel?

I don't know.

I don't want her to respond.

Yeah, you're like...

Ugh!

Ugh.

Perfect.

Marshall! Marshall!

The power of my friends.

I was able to, to burst this flame.

Yes!

You're welcome.

Welcome to the Camp fYrefly fire.

What I would love to start our night with...

is a spooky, spooky story.

Does anyone have a spooky, spooky story

they want to share? - Me!

Yes? Okay, come on down.

So, after Googling "DIY top surgery" on Wiki-How...

- No! - I did, it was a dark time.

I decided, I must obtain a binder.

I have no perception of what my body looks like.

So, I just picked a size,

and it immediately gets stuck, like this.

No!

And so, I'm like, well, this is really awkward,

but it's fine. I'm just gonna go get my mom.

So, I step out of the stall, awkwardly,

and I walk to the door, and I'm like, "Mom! Help!"

And she doesn't respond because she's left me there.

Thank you.

I didn't know transitioning was an option.

There's a trans support community,

and they helped me find things out.

They helped me about all my gender dysphoria.

And, they got me on hormone therapy.

Medically transitioning is my personal preference,

but nobody else has to medically transition

unless they want to.

They don't have to do it because

they feel like they have to.

It's all what somebody is comfortable with.

When trans people encounter cis people,

cis people will always ask about,

"Oh, how does it feel to be in a different body?"

Or surgeries, or whatever, and it's always

about the trans person in a bubble,

when I find the vast majority of my discomfort

as a trans person is from cis people.

Guys, can we do a little, maybe like a check in

on how the day went?

People have been really nice today, so that was good.

- Aw. - Who wants to go next?

We found my bracelet.

It takes me a while to get comfortable with a group.

So, I just try to stay, like, quiet for a bit until I,

'til I get comfortable.

Supper was really good, I'm gonna be honest.

I've met people who are adopted, are Black,

are Queer, or Haitian.

But, I've just, I've never really met that

whole package together, I guess.

It feels kind of like no one can understand

some things about you. I mean, obviously,

there's a lot of stuff that my friends and I

have in common, but I feel like there is

a lot of stuff that they don't get.

And sometimes, like,

they just don't try to understand.

Okay, guys! Maybe let's stop the chatting!

Let's turn off our lights, and let's go to bed.

No!

It would be nice to meet somebody who can

understand me on another level.

Okay, guys, go to bed!

No! No!

I'm signing up for the drag one, I think.

Welcome, I know you folks have had lots of time to

get to know each other, but...

I would love to get to know you folks as well.

I can start- my name is Marshall.

My pronouns are they/them,

and something that makes me feel fierce is lip syncing.

You saw that coming, yeah, yeah.

I just want to get to know you and how you move,

so I'm gonna play a song,

and you can all find any space in this area.

Feel free to jam, do whatever you have to do just to get

all of that fierceness out of you, okay?

♪ STANDING WHERE I AM NOW. ♪

♪ STANDING UP AT ALL. ♪

You have all of these tools. You can move with your hips,

you can move with your shoulders.

♪ ...FEELING LIKE I WAS NEVER GONNA SEE MYSELF. ♪

♪ AT THE FINISH LINE. ♪

Now I'd love for us to focus on some facial expressions.

♪ HANGING ON TO PARTS OF ME. ♪

Love it!

I feel like it's very important to kids growing up,

and anyone in the community, to see that there is...

a place where people can come together and

don't have to worry about being judged.

♪ SEND ALL THOSE VILLAINS AFTER ME. ♪

I felt that I need to act up, act tough.

And, act a certain way so people can like me.

But now, it's just lots of fun

getting to know new people,

and getting away from home for a bit, and just...

being able to, again, let my guard down and

just be myself.

You're beautiful butterflies!

When you're a part of that community of being queer,

you know, we're very different...

for something that we can't control,

but, like, that's just kind of how it is.

But, I just feel like we forget there's little things,

that sometimes people can be hurtful.

I don't know how to explain it, but

I just find that kind of hard.

I don't know, a lot of people seem, like, to be closer,

and I'm kind of just there.

But it'll only get better, I'm just...

Yeah, been really anxious, but it'll get better.

I'm really happy to be here though.

Let's see your surprised face!

Like, I don't know, everyone in my group,

they got close really quickly.

Even if I was there, like, at the start.

And so, that kind of like...

I don't know, terrifies me 'cause I feel like

I'm not gonna get close to them.

I remember, in grade 4,

I went to a private school where we had uniforms.

And, I had to wear a skirt.

- Oh, yeah. - And I was like...

"I absolutely love this."

My mom just kind of, like, brought me, like,

the dresses and skirts, and I just like...

like, at first I was fine with it,

but then I just started to, like...

I don't know, it just didn't sit right.

- It wasn't you. - Yeah.

In grade 4 is when I first, like...

questioned my sexuality.

And then...

and then I came out to my mom, I was a lesbian.

And then I came out to her as bisexual.

And then, I came out to her as trans.

And then, I came out to her as bisexual again.

And then I came out to everyone as bisexual.

And then, later on, I came out as a lesbian,

and then I just... now don't label it as much.

Yeah, that's fair.

Kind of grade 5 is when I kind of questioned it,

or realized I started to like this girl.

And I didn't really think about it much at first.

So, I was like, okay.

And then, I kind of realized it, and then...

I didn't get to tell my parents.

They found, they found out a different way, but...

Oh, really? Oh, I'm sorry.

It's okay.

But, they're supportive and everything,

but I kind of just wish I could have told them, myself.

Yeah, yeah, that sucks.

Oh, yeah, yeah, I skateboard.

What about you?

I can, I can skateboard. I'm not very good at it.

We can skate sometime, then.

Yeah, that'd be really fun.

You have to teach me some things.

Alrighty! Oh, I'm seeing so many beautiful looks!

Ooh, I love this.

I love it.

Now, does anybody need any help?

Let's see yours.

Wow...

Do you mind if I help you out?

Honestly, I've never done my makeup.

This is your first time doing makeup?

Really?

Open your eyes.

Perfect, okay, I'm just, just gonna go in there with

a different colour and blend them together.

- Okay. - Yeah.

Is this your first time at camp?

Yes.

How did you hear about Camp fYrefly?

Um...

I heard about it a few years ago.

Ah, when I turned transgender.

Yeah.

I was about...

10.

Yeah, so how long have you been out?

Well, you could say that I was,

I was acting like a girl since I was 3.

Right.

But, I officially came out, I think when I was 8.

So, when I decided I was a girl,

I was only 8 years old.

And, my mom suggested that

we waited until the summer because

she was like, it would be kind of-

it would be interesting to finish off the year,

and then transition to a girl.

Are you okay with lashes?

- I'm okay. - Yeah? Okay.

Perfect...

That whole summer, I went as a girl.

We went to this place in Banff, and nobody knew...

what my actual gender was.

And, it was, it was really nice.

Let's see? Oh, my- okay, wait.

No, we need to do another one.

Let's see.

Perfect! I'm just gonna dry it up.

It felt very cool.

It was exciting.

I could say that I was Jane, and no one would even...

say the opposite thing.

And, it was, it was exciting!

It was happy- I was happy.

And, how do you feel about lip, lipstick?

Ah, I don't mind.

It was easy to be me.

Are you ready to see what you look like?

- Yes. - Are you excited?

- Yes. - Are you sure?

- Yes! - Okay, great.

I'm so nervous.

Okay...

Oh, my goodness!

She's beautiful!

I've never seen this before.

You look beautiful.

- What do you think? - Really nice.

- You like it? - Mhm.

Good.

Welcome to the corrals, everybody.

My name is Morgan.

I am one of the wranglers here.

These are our horses, or 8 of them.

So, we're gonna start over here,

with this lovely lady right here at the fence.

Her name is Zephyr.

And then, on this side,

in the really pretty pink halter, is Eddie.

Horses can feel your centre of energy.

They can feel if you're calm.

They can feel if you're stressed, scared,

anxious, any of that.

So, we want to make sure that we're giving off

a nice, calm energy.

I don't like labels.

I don't like being labeled, but if I had to,

it would be gender fluid.

I've put those labels on me just because I think

it's what other people will understand.

Everyone asks, "What's your gender?

Like, what do you identify as?"

I'm just Ghoul, I'm...

a little creature.

Alright, I'm gonna teach you how to

safely approach them now,

and then we'll get into partners,

and we'll go meet a horse. Sound good?

Hi, Bandit.

You can come up and say hi now, if you'd like.

I'm scared of horses.

Oh...

That's about as close as I can get right now.

They take some adjusting, that's for sure.

Yeah, they're very big.

And I feel like this one's judging me.

At school, it was really easy for me to feel judged

by the people around me.

I didn't look like anybody else.

I didn't dress like anybody else.

I didn't act like anybody else.

So, to get around our horses- once we've done that-

is we just do a nice bum hug.

Just like this.

I tend to disengage when I feel like

people are judging me.

Warm.

It's just easier that way, instead of...

actually dealing with it.

Feels really soft.

It feels, sort of like

rug that I have at my house.

My whole life, I've felt like

I was pushed to pretend I was okay.

And I kept pushing myself

until there was that breaking point.

And then, at that point, I had to accept that

I was different, you know?

I'm gonna keep getting up and get better and

get back at it, no matter what.

You are terrifying, but hey.

Coming to this realization made me realize

I am a force to be reckoned with,

and I can do anything.

Also, I'm overheating because it's hot and

I'm wearing all black. - It's really hot.

Thank you for the shade.

Thank you, good sir, thank you.

Sir, madam? Horses don't have gender.

Sir? Ma'am?

I'm so scared of hitting you with my crutch.

Look at this glitter glue, it's like...

It's beautiful.

Manessa, have you done your happy box yet?

I have not.

So, basically, your happy box is,

people can put notes in it.

You can put notes in other people's happy boxes.

You can decorate it. Put your name on it.

And I said, "Astrid thinks you're cute."

When I came out, the family I was living with-

so they have like a whole bunch of younger children-

I came out as bi.

I was like, "Hey, there's this girl I like.

I want her to come over."

And they're like, "Okay, yeah, like we support you.

But, don't kiss her in front of my kids."

I wish that they would've been more understanding,

and be like, "Yeah, we can explain it to our kids."

It felt like so sad to not be supported.

And then it feels like, oh, I did something wrong.

My mom is just like lacking in some of that understanding.

So, I think it's just like the more-

- She learns. - She learns!

And she's growing, and she has grown.

So, it's like those people who, like,

don't necessarily understand it...

all, but like, are looking for more information,

and aren't fully there yet,

but those are like the best kind of people.

Yeah!

I'm like a month clean from self-harm.

Like, as soon as something goes wrong, it was my go-to.

It's getting better.

And, any time I was struggling with it,

I always covered up 'cause I didn't want people to know.

But then, as soon as I wore like a t-shirt or a tank top,

everyone was like, "What's that on your arm?"

My thing is that I just had to learn to be kind to myself.

Like, especially when I was trying to get clean.

It was like, when I failed, I felt so horrible.

And then the second I was able to, like, progress,

and get to that one-month mark,

that two-month mark, was when I stopped being

mad at myself for doing it.

I was like, this is a stress response

that is out of my control.

I am trying to make myself feel better.

I do get comments about it, about my scars,

'cause I do have healed...

self-harm scars in multiple places on my body.

But I, I don't hate my scars,

and I don't dislike them.

I love my scars because when I look at them,

I see that they're healed.

And they're done, and I can look at them and remember,

I don't need to do that anymore.

I love your pants, honestly.

I'd pay you for pants like that.

Oh, I got shorts from the clothing swap,

and I'm gonna do that to them.

Yes, do it, it's so much fun.

Reminder, on the first day when

your pods made community guidelines together,

a gentle reminder around romantic relationships

being built at camp.

After the camp, for sure.

Woohoo!

Because of what happened at my school,

I feel like my trust has gone down for a lot of people.

Opening up to someone new who comes in my life

is really difficult for me.

Nice!

But, the more time that passes,

just having that connection makes it a lot easier

to open up and to trust that person.

I'm so happy right now.

If you guys could have an ideal dream planet,

what would it be?

- Gay. - Dream planet?

- It would be gay. - Gay?

It would be full of the queers,

and we would have the best time.

Oh, I just remember, like I was so...

Even though this is a queer camp,

I was so scared to come here.

Just because I was like, what if they don't accept me?

What if I'm not, like, trans enough?

And then, to get here, like, day one,

and have you ripping off my bind in the washroom

'cause I was wearing the wrong size-

just judgemental for all the good reasons.

That sounds violent- I helped you, aggressively.

It was very stuck. I was wearing like three.

Oh, my gosh!

You were wearing two, and I was very angry.

I didn't know you could wear more than one binder.

- You don't. - You don't!

- It'ss very bad for you. - Don't do it.

I had a feeling that was a bad thing.

- You end up wheezing. - I was wheezing so bad.

Camp has taught me that, like,

I can just be whatever I want to be.

Like, I can be like a trans femme with hairy legs.

And I don't gotta, I don't gotta apologize for that.

There's the Big Dipper.

I see a triangle, which is pretty sick.

No, it's kind of like sideways.

If you turn your head diagonally,

then the Big Dicker-

- What's the Big Dipper? - Big Dicker!

I said, "The Big Dicker!"

Oh, my gosh!

What?!

You know what's kind of cool?

What?

If there were arguably aliens on another planet,

and they had a massive telescope,

and they looked down at Earth,

they could probably still see the dinosaurs being here

because the light would be just reaching them.

Why am I jealous of aliens now?

I want to see Triceratops just vibing.

Yeah!

So, if we can give a warm welcome to our Rainbow Elders

that have joined us today.

Hi.

We are the Rainbow Elders Calgary.

What we do is, we try to connect with young people

because we know that it's not an easy journey, being gay.

I was raised in a...

fanatical Christian home.

There was no discussion about sexual identity,

gender identity.

Not only was it a closed subject,

but bringing it up would get you in trouble.

It cost me everything to transition.

Now, resilience comes from surviving adversity.

But, you don't have to actually give-

create your own adversities.

And that happens from...

caving, caving to some... somebody else's idea

of who you should be.

According to Aristotle,

the meaning of life is to enjoy yourself.

If you stay honest to the things you want,

your life will feel much better.

I've gone on too long.

I'll pass the floor on.

Specifically in my community, I don't have a lot of older

queer people to like ask questions to, and...

rely on.

I would like to ask an older queer person

what things were like when they were younger,

how they dealt with it, and how they managed to

persevere and find a life that they love.

I was married for 10 years, had two children,

when I realized that I was also attracted to women.

And, I ran across a small gay community at a little

hole in the wall gay bar that was selling tickets

to straight people to come down and

look at the queers.

So, we as a community, boycotted.

And so, consequently, they went bankrupt,

and we took over the lease.

And finally, we had a place where the gay community

could, could meet and enjoy themselves.

My youth was very isolated.

I grew up in a very rural town,

so I can see you guys, you know,

maybe having those sort of same lived experiences,

and it's a difficult time, but I have lived through it.

I've gone past it,

I've had a lot of positive things in my life.

And I'm out here now, and I'm out and I'm proud,

and I'm here, and I want to make a difference

now that I'm older.

My main interest at this point in my life is to

continue to meet as many young people as I can,

to find out what their goals are, what their vision are.

What do you see the gay community, 20 years from now,

30 years from now?

And what are you going to do about it to make sure

it continues to move forward?

And you have to be constantly vigilant because

there are some church organizations,

and definitely some politicians,

that would change the law just like that.

Don't let it be taken away from you

just by being complacent.

There's always work to be done,

and if not right here in our own backyard,

for other countries, other gay people

throughout the world. So, don't give up.

I am one of those kids from...

a rural town, who...

does not have any resources,

or help, or any support, or any...

education about being queer, being trans.

When I was trying to figure myself out,

I felt so completely alone because I had never met

a queer person older than me.

I was the only person that I knew who was

going through this and,

I know that a lot of people have had similar experiences,

and it sucks, but it doesn't have to

be like that anymore.

And I think that's really awesome that we have the

chance to improve on that.

I've never felt more support anywhere else in my life.

And, I'm so glad I'm making connections because

making friends is hard when you...

stand out as much as I do,

because people are judging you often.

But here, it feels judgement - free, it feels safe.

I feel like everyone else here is just as weird

as I am, for lack of a better term.

This place is the best for- I've ever felt.

- Can we take a group picture? - 1, 2, 3!

- Queer joy. - Queer joy!

Thank you very much! All done on my end.

♪ DARLING, A MESSAGE TO DELIVER ♪

♪ I HOPE YOU'RE READY ♪

♪ FOR THE CALL, I'LL BE... ♪

Okay, team, I would like you to jump on the rope, okay...

Let's go and support that climber.

I kept looking down.

I kept looking down the whole time.

- Is my belay on? - Yeah.

- Can I climb? - Yes.

My mom texted me back.

She just kind of ignored it and skipped over it.

Like, I said, "Good, I came out as trans."

And then, she responds with: "What activities did you do?

How many are at camp?

Being on film put a kink in me,

wishing you a sincere goodbye and

wishing you had an amazing time.

Meet friends, get lots of pictures, and have fun."

That's all she said.

And I was like, okay, okay, alright.

That's like a big moment in someone's life.

And you're just like...

"What activities did you do?"

"How was camp?"

When you come out to your parents without getting the

supportive response you might have expected,

it kind of feels like the floor falls out

from underneath you.

No, I'm not calling her, no way!

It kind of just feels draining to not have that support,

or like, just acceptance in the basic topic of it.

Don't look down!

You're worse than me.

I'm nervous to see how this plays out,

and how this conversation goes at home.

I just want them to see me,

and understand me as who I am.

Go, King! Don't fall.

Almost there.

At camp, you could see that there was

one kid or another who was

struggling with something or other.

And, camp not only gives you the opportunity

to be supported, but it also gives you

the opportunity to support.

You're pretty much over that edge now.

There you go! Now you're over the edge!

- You're almost at the bell! - Woo!

Being able to provide that support,

it almost gives you a feeling of closure.

- You're all good. - Yeah!

Oh, my God, you did it! I had no faith in you.

What can I say? Master, legend.

You're just made because you could definitely not do it.

Oh, yeah, no, I'm...

gonna be honest, I probably couldn't.

Hey- Oh!

Alright, I see how it is.

Do you know how to make origami things?

I can teach you how to make a frog.

It just needs to be folded to make a square.

I went for the rock climbing thing.

I love it, just 'cause...

you get to leave the earth.

I don't.

I just wish I could express myself the same way

I do here, when I'm at school, because...

Here, I don't have to worry about the judgement

over the neurodiversities,

'cause I have to mask that a lot.

But yeah, here, I feel comfortable with the ticks.

People complain that I talk too much, yeah.

So I don't talk at school anymore.

But I talk here, a lot.

Because, I learned very early on that not talking

about things leads to a lot of problems.

Generally in the past, when queer people have spoken

about their queerness to people, face-to-face,

they have gotten punched in the face...

for being queer.

But on the internet, no one knows who you are

in real life unless you tell them.

You can talk about being queer if you don't get to

talk about being queer with your family.

In like 6th grade, I found

a bunch of trans masc YouTubers.

I watched all of the T videos.

I watched all of the top surgery.

I watched, like, everything.

So, it was kind of like...

an, oh, I found my community.

My parents never talked about it.

I never learned about anything like that in schools.

I... did all of the research about

different identities by myself,

and it was really overwhelming,

but as I've learned more about the community

and about myself, I realize that there are

so many options, and I could finally found one-

find one that fit me. And I did.

Frog.

Wrong side- you hop from the legs.

Okay...

I think everyone has a sheet of paper in front of them.

So, let's read out what's on the sheet of paper,

and then we can give you sort of a definition.

Would anybody like to talk about

what intersectionality is?

It's basically what the word says,

it's how your identities intersect with each other,

and whether you're a POC, or disabled, or white,

or whatever, the different queer experiences

within different experiences.

- Mhm, wonderful. - Well said.

Yeah!

I think that society was drawn that way,

where the way you were labeled, that's how you acted.

It's like you kind of...

I don't know, it's like a character on a video game.

You have all these things you can do and

things you can't do.

Gender identity...

Gender identity, you often hear

of like, it's what's in-between the ears.

Right, because it's so innate in all of us.

And the other side of that is why

pronouns are so, so, so important!

But, I think the more we grow into society,

people have to start to learn that and to accept that,

that we're not gonna necessarily act...

the way that our label tells us to act.

How do we know what someone's pronouns are?

- Ask them. - Ask them.

Perfect! Perfect. Basic stuff.

What do you do if you accidentally use

the wrong pronouns?

- Correct yourself. - Apologize quickly.

But, you don't spend a lot of time on it.

You don't be like, "Oh, I'm such a terrible person

'cause I messed it up."

You just correct yourself and move on.

- Exactly. - I love it, yes.

We're starting to learn that whole idea of, like,

the freedom. The freedom to do what you...

want to do, and express yourself

the way you want to do.

And even I talked about that with my mom, too,

just the way she was raised.

Things like LGBTQ or, People of Colour,

it was never talked about as a...

you know, feelings weren't talked about very much

in the household.

Do you want to read out what we have for identities and

ways of being?

Sure. Um...

There's "disabled" and "neurodivergent".

And then there's two ones that say,

"Haitian" and another one that says "queer".

There's also "immigrant" and "intersection".

Yeah.

- Try to remember the card. - Okay.

- Okay, I got it. - Okay, put it back in.

Is this your card?

Yeah!

Wow!

That was impressive.

I know you said that you were also adopted.

When you said that, I was like...

What?! I was like-

What are the odds?

At first when you, when you,

you said you were from Haiti, I was like, okay.

And then when you said you were adopted, too,

I was like, oh, okay!

No way.

I don't meet a lot of other people from Haiti.

And, I meet even fewer who are adopted.

And even fewer who were adopted at a young age.

Yeah.

'Cause I was adopted when I was just...

I think like over two years old.

Yeah, we were around the same age when we were adopted.

- Yeah. - Which is cool.

Were you adopted with siblings or by yourself?

Well, I have siblings.

I think they still live in Haiti...

because they're older than me, too.

Yeah, mine are older than me as well.

But my parents decided to adopt

when I was like one and a half or something.

And my brother was under a year old.

We were in the orphanage maybe six months or something

before we were like matched.

But growing up, I think my family kind of tried,

to like, have us have cultural influences.

And it's hard when like everyone you grow up with

looks different from you and acts different from you,

like...

So, I think I was really excited when you said

you were also adopted from Haiti, 'cause I'm like...

I was too, and it was nice because

you're also a queer person who's like, you know,

in the same boat as me, and it's like,

it's hard to find a lot of, you know,

Black people who are also, you know,

supportive sometimes. I mean, there is obviously...

there, there are, but it's,

it's hard to find that mix sometimes.

Can I ask, like...

I don't know if you feel super connected

to your culture.

I feel really separated from mine,

which makes me sad sometimes.

Like, it's hard, especially in Calgary, to find, you know,

a lot of Haitian culture and everything, and...

I don't think my mom, like- I think...

I don't think she like tried to push me away from it.

- I just think... - Yeah.

I don't know, their traditions are...

Yeah.

Their like, I don't know,

some food they eat or whatever.

I don't know, just things like that would just be nice.

I feel like when families adopt kids from

other cultures and races, like,

it's hard to be prepared for, like, connecting a kid.

Right, and then, when you're not really growing up in it,

it's hard to... yeah.

Like, replicate that. Like, how do you...

you know, like, simulate that experience

of growing up in Haiti when, like,

we're in Canada, we're in Alberta?

Yeah.

I think meeting someone who's in the same boat as me

gave me a lot more confidence in myself.

It just feels good to be around people

who like geneuinely get it.

I found like one, like...

like, Jamaican restaurant.

That was the closest I found.

I think there is a good Haitian restaurant in Calgary.

There definitely is one in Edmonton.

I think there should be a bit more.

I agree. That'd be nice.

That'd be nice if we went to something together

since I do know you very well.

- That would be cool. - Yeah.

And it made me just more proud to

be all the stuff I am.

So, it was nice.

Another heart.

Nice, good job. You're getting the hang of it.

- Hey! - Ooh.

It's always dangerous playing cards outside.

Okay...

You look really beautiful!

Yeah!

Hello, everybody!

Hi!

Welcome, and thank you so much for joining us here at

the Camp fYrefly "gay-la".

We're gathered here in the middle of the woods

to showcase our talent.

Please feel free to sing along.

Yeah, okay.

"Truth Hurts" By Lizzo ♪

♪ I JUST TOOK A DNA TEST. ♪

♪ TURNS OUT I'M 100% THAT BITCH ♪

♪ EVEN WHEN I'M CRYING CRAZY ♪

♪ YEAH, I GOT BOY PROBLEMS ♪

♪ THAT'S THE HUMAN IN ME. ♪

♪ BLING BLING, THEN I SOLVE 'EM ♪

♪ THAT'S THE GODDESS IN ME ♪

♪ YOU COULDA HAD A BAD BITCH, NON-COMMITTAL ♪

♪ ...HOLD ME DOWN ♪

♪ BUT YOU'RE HOLDING ME BACK ♪

♪ AND THAT'S THE SOUND ♪

♪ OF ME NOT CALLING YOU BACK. ♪

♪ BOM BOM BI BOM BI DUM DUM AY ♪

When it comes to my future, I'm not 100% sure yet.

Hopefully, I will be medically transitioned

to a point where I'm comfortable.

I want to be a dad.

I want to have kids one day.

I want to pursue my interests in fashion so,

I just hope that in 10 years

that I'll be more me than I, than I am right now.

However that will happen, it'll happen.

Oliver!

Even though camp is ending,

and we are, undoubtedly, going to go our separate ways,

it's still just so nice to know that at the very least,

we have each other now.

And, we'll have these memories

for the rest of our lives.

Yeah, my dudes will always have my back.

Um... This is a piece called "Nevermore".

I played it in school this year.

It's my favourite piece that we played.

We're good to go.

I think being brave and trusting myself

has been really hard.

I haven't played in a while, so I might mess up.

You got this!

Yeah!

But, I feel like I'm much more brave

to be myself a bit more.

That's it.

Give it up for Mia!

Really makes me feel special because I know

that there are people out there

who want to see that, and who do care

about my true, authentic self.

It feels like the weight has been lifted off,

and I can like relax...

and do me.

♪ ...REACHING OUT FOR YOU. ♪

♪ IN THE DARK. ♪

♪ I'M JUST NO GOOD AT GIVING RELIEF. ♪

♪ IN THE DARK. ♪

♪ IT WON'T BE EASY TO FIND RELIEF ♪

♪ AND I'M NOT PROUD ♪

♪ THAT NOTHING WILL SEEM EASY ABOUT ME ♪

♪ BUT I PROMISE THIS ♪

♪ I WON'T GO MY WHOLE LIFE ♪

♪ TELLING YOU I DON'T NEED ♪

In 10 years, I could maybe see myself somewhere.

In a city, like in an apartment.

Maybe I'm living with somebody else, maybe I'm not.

I'd like to be able to help people

like me when I was younger.

I'd like to be the person that I needed.

I either want to be a criminal justice lawyer,

or I would want to be a film director.

Either way, I want to do something to help people.

And like, make an impact on the world.

I see myself probably in a better place, very happy.

And, I see myself being successful.

I think, I think I'm going to be successful.

I can imagine that I'd be in an apartment, definitely.

Being a hard worker...

trying her best to do what she can.

Happy last day, campers.

After breakfast, we're gonna have the closing ceremony.

And then, the bus will be here by noon,

so please have your bags ready to go by then.

Thank you!

Everyone in the world is going to know that

you drink straight milk.

Milk is so good.

Good milk.

I'm really nervous to see my parents

and kind of talk to them...

to see how this plays out, and how this

conversation goes at home.

They're not gonna like throw out all the milk, right?

- No. - Okay.

- 'Cause I was like... - The milk.

The milk can go back.

Good.

In my family, when we have something to talk about,

we kind of just say it, and it just sits there.

We don't really discuss it.

Kind of just left out on the table, like cold dinner,

and just kind of cools down until nobody really

wants to eat it.

It feels a lot worse because this is literally who I am.

I love my parents, and I know they love me,

but I wish they could understand and see me,

as Kingston.

Have I ever told you that I hate you?

Oh, yeah.

Marshall has a few words

to really bring this all together.

- Go, Marshall! - Thanks, everyone.

You don't have to stop clapping

just 'cause up I'm here.

Growing up, I didn't necessarily

have friends who were queer.

The fear of being my true self, it made me pretty weak,

as I'm sure a lot of you can feel as well.

It's... very hard

to be queer in this world.

Take a moment and acknowledge, and,

and see how much you shine,

and how much you've allowed yourself

to shine here at camp.

And, please hold onto that shine

for as long as you can.

It's so amazing just to see

how much you've grown and thrived,

and I want to all remind you all to just keep shining.

I was bullied for being gay for three years,

at my old school, and it really put me down.

And, coming here, like, I just forgot about

everything that happened at my old school,

and I just feel so much better

to be here with all of you,

and feel like I have a home with you guys.

I don't want to leave.

I will be back next year, for sure.

I mean, the best thing about being at camp has probably

been actually making friends that are in a similar

community to me.

Where I'm from, it's a really small town, and there's not-

dude, stop, I'm gonna cry.

I'm trying not to!

And, I really love you guys.

So...

I'm gonna cry. I'm gonna get off now.

There's the things that'll stick with me,

which are probably the bug bites more than anything else.

But, also just the memories

of seeing queer people having fun.

It's just nice to see everyone happy.

And, this image is going to stick with me forever.

One thing I'm gonna leave with,

all the clothing from the clothing swap.

♪ YOU SAID, "YOU DON'T KNOW HER

♪ LIKE I DO" ♪

♪ DON'T BELIEVE YOU'RE NO GOOD WHEN I INSIST ♪

♪ THAT WE ARE ALL MADE OF STONE ♪

♪ ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE ♪

♪ SHOULD I SAY READY FOR ♪

♪ ANOTHER BROKEN HEART ♪

♪ I DON'T CARE ♪

♪ IF YOU DON'T REALLY LOVE ME ♪

♪ AS LONG AS YOU BLOW ME A KISS ♪

♪ WE ARE ALL MADE OF STONE ♪

Queer joy! Queer joy!

Queer joy! Queer joy!

♪ STANDING WHERE I AM NOW. ♪

♪ STANDING UP AT ALL. ♪

♪ I WAS USED TO FEELING LIKE I WAS NEVER GONNA ♪

♪ SEE MYSELF, AT THE FINISH LINE ♪

♪ HANGING ON TWO PARTS OF ME ♪

♪ HANGING ON AT ALL ♪

♪ I WAS USED TO SEEING NO FUTURE ♪

♪ IN MY SIGHT LINE ♪

♪ SOMETIMES IT FEELS LIKE ♪

♪ THEY WANT TO REMIND ME. ♪

♪ SEND ALL THOSE VILLAINS AFTER ME. ♪

♪ FEELING LIKE I AM NOW. ♪

♪ LIGHTING UP THE HALL. ♪

♪ I WAS USED TO STANDING IN THE SHADOW ♪

♪ OF A DAMAGED HEART ♪

♪ LEARNING ALL I KNOW NOW ♪

♪ LOSING ALL I DID ♪

♪ I NEVER USED TO FEEL LIKE ♪

♪ I'D BE STANDING SO FAR AHEAD. ♪

♪ SOMETIMES IT FEELS WHAT I RECOVERED, YOU LOST. ♪

♪ SENDING YOUR PEACEFUL LOSS ♪

♪ TO ME ♪

♪ I'M NOT THEIR HERO, BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN ♪

♪ THAT I WASN'T BRAVE ♪

♪ I NEVER WALKED THE PARTY LINE ♪

♪ DOESN'T MEAN THAT I WAS NEVER AFRAID ♪

♪ I'M NOT YOUR HERO BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN ♪

♪ WE'RE NOT ONE AND THE SAME. ♪

♪ OH, OH, OH. ♪

♪ AH-OH-OH. ♪

♪ AH-OH-OH-OH. ♪