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This programme contains very strong
language and adult humour
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00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:07,880
- I just feel like everything
just keeps going wrong for me
at the minute, you know?
- Mm.
3
00:00:07,880 --> 00:00:10,520
People just keep dying.
I don't know who's going to be next.
4
00:00:10,520 --> 00:00:13,120
- Will it be me?
- Well, yes, it might well be.
5
00:00:13,120 --> 00:00:15,600
- Especially if you keep
dwelling on it.
- Sorry.
6
00:00:15,600 --> 00:00:18,240
Look, in life, you get back
what you put out there
7
00:00:18,240 --> 00:00:20,440
and, if you've been sending
negative vibrations
8
00:00:20,440 --> 00:00:23,800
all the way round to the table,
then don't be surprised
9
00:00:23,800 --> 00:00:26,920
when old Mr Negative Pants comes
and smacks you round the chops.
10
00:00:26,920 --> 00:00:29,080
Wait. So you're saying that...
11
00:00:29,080 --> 00:00:32,040
..I might have actually manifested
most of my family dying
12
00:00:32,040 --> 00:00:33,760
and being left in crippling debt?
13
00:00:33,760 --> 00:00:35,360
Yes.
14
00:00:35,360 --> 00:00:36,400
Oh.
15
00:00:36,400 --> 00:00:40,160
Look, what I do to try
and bring myself out of the slumps
16
00:00:40,160 --> 00:00:43,480
is I take a look
at those worse off than me.
17
00:00:43,480 --> 00:00:46,480
Mm. It's just, like, I just
don't think that's possible for me.
18
00:00:46,480 --> 00:00:48,200
Have a think about
all those little people
19
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in the submarine
that imploded into nothing.
20
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They literally became
nothing within seconds.
21
00:00:53,560 --> 00:00:54,760
Yeah, true.
22
00:00:54,760 --> 00:00:57,520
I volunteered at a food bank
and I met a guy there.
23
00:00:57,520 --> 00:01:01,720
He had lost his children, his house
and all of his limbs overnight.
24
00:01:01,720 --> 00:01:03,840
He was literally a torso
with a plate.
25
00:01:03,840 --> 00:01:06,560
So you see - it can be worse.
26
00:01:06,560 --> 00:01:08,160
That doesn't even sound that bad.
27
00:01:08,160 --> 00:01:09,360
I think it would benefit you
28
00:01:09,360 --> 00:01:11,560
if we took a little trip
down to the food bank.
29
00:01:11,560 --> 00:01:13,920
Make you appreciate
what you already have.
30
00:01:13,920 --> 00:01:15,920
How was he holding the plate,
though, if he wasn't...
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- "Give to those less fortunate..."
- ..able to have any more limbs?
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00:01:19,640 --> 00:01:22,280
"..and stop sulking like a brat."
33
00:01:25,840 --> 00:01:33,840
L'Amour Est Un Oiseau Rebelle
from Carmen by Georges Bizet
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00:01:35,160 --> 00:01:38,600
- Give back to others.
- Give back to others.
35
00:01:40,760 --> 00:01:42,160
This is actually really hard
36
00:01:42,160 --> 00:01:45,440
because, even though obviously
I want to wear something stylish,
37
00:01:45,440 --> 00:01:48,440
at the same time, I don't want to be
just flaunting my curves too much
38
00:01:48,440 --> 00:01:49,760
at all the hungry people.
39
00:01:50,840 --> 00:01:53,840
So you're actually going
to volunteer at a food bank
40
00:01:53,840 --> 00:01:55,600
to give back to other people?
41
00:01:55,600 --> 00:01:58,720
- Well, yeah.
- I never thought I'd see the day.
42
00:01:58,720 --> 00:02:00,120
Ooh, I never thought
I'd see this day.
43
00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:02,760
Quicker, quicker! I'm streaking.
44
00:02:02,760 --> 00:02:04,120
Why are you doing that?
45
00:02:04,120 --> 00:02:07,000
Because we've been inside so long,
your dad said I was looking pallid.
46
00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:09,080
Well, we're supposed to be ghosts.
47
00:02:09,080 --> 00:02:12,160
Look, more wide circles, remember?
48
00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:15,240
Chi, we're really proud of you.
49
00:02:15,240 --> 00:02:18,160
- Please, could you just do my back?
- No more layers, Terry.
50
00:02:18,160 --> 00:02:20,560
Any more layers
and you're going to get cancelled.
51
00:02:20,560 --> 00:02:22,800
I think
that I might actually just go
52
00:02:22,800 --> 00:02:25,440
and look in the cupboards
to see what I can donate.
53
00:02:25,440 --> 00:02:28,400
- She's doing it.
She's actually doing THINGS.
- Yeah.
54
00:02:28,400 --> 00:02:30,400
I'll believe it when I see it.
55
00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:32,560
Right. My back!
56
00:02:32,560 --> 00:02:34,960
SHE PUFFS
57
00:02:34,960 --> 00:02:36,400
Um...
58
00:02:36,400 --> 00:02:38,480
Bechamel sauce.
59
00:02:38,480 --> 00:02:40,640
No-one needs
that much bechamel sauce.
60
00:02:40,640 --> 00:02:41,840
What was that?
61
00:02:41,840 --> 00:02:44,080
Hello? Down here. Hi.
62
00:02:44,080 --> 00:02:47,000
Oh, is that a tiny
little Lily Allen?
63
00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:49,800
Mm-hm. Lil Allen.
From 2007, obviously.
64
00:02:49,800 --> 00:02:51,000
Oh, obviously.
65
00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:53,200
- Well, hey, Lily Allen.
- Hi.
66
00:02:56,840 --> 00:02:58,480
You have enough now. You can stop.
67
00:02:58,480 --> 00:03:00,600
Oh, well, tell me
what I'm supposed to take, then.
68
00:03:00,600 --> 00:03:02,120
Come on, help me, Lily Allen -
69
00:03:02,120 --> 00:03:03,840
you're working class, aren't you?
70
00:03:03,840 --> 00:03:04,960
I've got to go now.
71
00:03:07,240 --> 00:03:09,280
Don't tell anyone
I'm from Hammersmith.
72
00:03:09,280 --> 00:03:11,840
- Ahhh!
- # Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah... #
73
00:03:11,840 --> 00:03:13,040
THUD
74
00:03:11,840 --> 00:03:13,040
Ow.
75
00:03:13,040 --> 00:03:15,040
Oh, well, thanks for your help. Bye.
76
00:03:16,560 --> 00:03:18,000
SHE PUFFS
77
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Bechamel sauce.
78
00:03:22,120 --> 00:03:24,360
So what have we got, then, Lucas?
79
00:03:24,360 --> 00:03:26,080
Bread and cress or cress and bread.
80
00:03:28,800 --> 00:03:31,200
When are you getting paid again,
Dad?
81
00:03:31,200 --> 00:03:33,280
Not until next week.
82
00:03:33,280 --> 00:03:36,040
So we shouldn't go too
heavy on the cress.
83
00:03:36,040 --> 00:03:38,200
Oh, sweet - cress.
84
00:03:38,200 --> 00:03:39,400
No, no!
85
00:03:45,080 --> 00:03:47,200
SHE SPLUTTERS
86
00:03:48,520 --> 00:03:50,840
- Er, so what's in the bag?
- What, this?
87
00:03:50,840 --> 00:03:53,040
Oh, it's just stuff
I'm donating to a food bank.
88
00:03:53,040 --> 00:03:54,240
Yeah, I basically decided
89
00:03:54,240 --> 00:03:56,480
that I should just
sort of start giving back,
90
00:03:56,480 --> 00:03:59,320
really raise the vibrations
that I put out there, you know?
91
00:03:59,320 --> 00:04:00,800
- Ah, that's lovely, Chi.
- Yeah. Thanks.
92
00:04:00,800 --> 00:04:02,480
You can come if you want.
It'll be a right laugh.
93
00:04:02,480 --> 00:04:06,320
- That'd be a laugh, yeah.
- Sorry, as a volunteer or a customer?
94
00:04:06,320 --> 00:04:07,880
Whatever you identify as, really.
95
00:04:09,440 --> 00:04:10,680
SHE SIGHS
96
00:04:14,440 --> 00:04:15,840
SHE SPITS
97
00:04:15,840 --> 00:04:18,080
Isn't this meant to be a bank?
98
00:04:18,080 --> 00:04:19,960
Doesn't look very secure.
99
00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:21,120
CHATTER
100
00:04:24,280 --> 00:04:26,200
I'm here, ready to give back.
101
00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:29,160
Oh, good! Right, well, put this on,
102
00:04:29,160 --> 00:04:33,000
- and we'll get you started
straight away.
- Nothing else?
103
00:04:33,000 --> 00:04:34,360
What are you two doing here?
104
00:04:34,360 --> 00:04:35,720
Are you giving or taking?
105
00:04:35,720 --> 00:04:37,400
Well, we've brought some food, so...
106
00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:40,120
OK, well, this is the takers line.
Step aside, please.
107
00:04:42,320 --> 00:04:44,720
I'm really sorry about your
situation, so I hope this will help.
108
00:04:44,720 --> 00:04:46,400
No, don't give it to her.
She's on our side.
109
00:04:46,400 --> 00:04:48,240
- Oh, OK.
- Just pop that...
pop that back in your bag.
110
00:04:48,240 --> 00:04:49,760
What do I do, then?
111
00:04:49,760 --> 00:04:51,320
Well...
112
00:04:51,320 --> 00:04:55,400
..it's very important that you
follow my soup system correctly.
113
00:04:55,400 --> 00:04:59,600
- Yeah?
- If the customer is plump,
bone broths only.
114
00:05:01,120 --> 00:05:04,080
If they're on the slender side, then
you're looking at your "cream ofs".
115
00:05:04,080 --> 00:05:06,880
- Got it?
- OK, yeah.
- Good.
- Plump, slender.
116
00:05:08,200 --> 00:05:10,480
I don't think
we brought enough cress, Lucas.
117
00:05:10,480 --> 00:05:13,320
I had no idea our country
was in this much of a crisis.
118
00:05:13,320 --> 00:05:15,920
Yeah. I mean, the failure
of successive governments,
119
00:05:15,920 --> 00:05:18,120
coupled with late stage
capitalism and inflation,
120
00:05:18,120 --> 00:05:19,920
has crushed systemic change.
121
00:05:19,920 --> 00:05:23,400
- Right. We need to
make this right, Lucas.
- Yeah.
122
00:05:23,400 --> 00:05:26,480
- Let's walk and talk.
- All right.
123
00:05:26,480 --> 00:05:28,640
Thank you. I really appreciate this.
124
00:05:28,640 --> 00:05:31,480
Oh, well, what can I say?
I'm just a really great person.
125
00:05:31,480 --> 00:05:33,560
OK, off you pop, then, greedy guts.
126
00:05:35,080 --> 00:05:36,760
Yeah, have the "cream of".
127
00:05:36,760 --> 00:05:39,720
- See? Feels good, doesn't it,
giving back?
- Pssh, yeah.
128
00:05:39,720 --> 00:05:42,120
You know,
puts everything into perspective.
129
00:05:42,120 --> 00:05:44,040
You've got nothing
to be depressed about, Chi.
130
00:05:44,040 --> 00:05:46,280
- Um...
- Mm.
131
00:05:46,280 --> 00:05:48,360
What about all my family being dead,
though?
132
00:05:48,360 --> 00:05:52,040
That's still...
a thing, though, right?
133
00:05:54,040 --> 00:05:55,640
Er, a vegetable broth.
134
00:05:57,680 --> 00:06:00,120
SHE GASPS
135
00:05:57,680 --> 00:06:00,120
Oh, my God, Sarah Gilbeaux!
136
00:06:00,120 --> 00:06:01,760
What?!
137
00:06:01,760 --> 00:06:04,200
Wow, what are you doing here?
138
00:06:04,200 --> 00:06:07,280
Is it Comic Relief? Are you...?
Where's Lenny Henry?
139
00:06:07,280 --> 00:06:09,960
No, I don't do comedy any more,
do I, Bev?
140
00:06:10,960 --> 00:06:12,160
Why?
141
00:06:12,160 --> 00:06:14,640
Well, I just prefer
to express myself
142
00:06:14,640 --> 00:06:17,040
through drawings
and still-life paintings now.
143
00:06:17,040 --> 00:06:18,200
You know, more like...
144
00:06:19,720 --> 00:06:22,000
- ..Adolf Hitler.
- Yeah.
145
00:06:22,000 --> 00:06:26,280
Oh, gosh. Well, you know,
if your drawings are anywhere near
146
00:06:26,280 --> 00:06:28,240
as powerful as your stand-up,
then...
147
00:06:29,280 --> 00:06:31,120
..the art world
is lucky to have you.
148
00:06:31,120 --> 00:06:33,440
Well, if only the art world paid,
right?
149
00:06:33,440 --> 00:06:34,800
THEY LAUGH
150
00:06:34,800 --> 00:06:38,120
Oh, you've got some bloody nerve,
showing up in here!
151
00:06:38,120 --> 00:06:40,000
Oh, great.
152
00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:42,240
You here, of all people.
153
00:06:42,240 --> 00:06:43,400
Avert your eyes, babe.
154
00:06:43,400 --> 00:06:48,840
Ruth, this is Sarah Gilbeaux
from, um...from, er...
155
00:06:48,840 --> 00:06:49,960
Oh, wait, I actually don't know.
156
00:06:49,960 --> 00:06:51,240
It's OK - I know.
157
00:06:51,240 --> 00:06:52,760
Terrible stand-up.
158
00:06:51,240 --> 00:06:52,760
SARAH GASPS
159
00:06:52,760 --> 00:06:54,200
Abysmal painter.
160
00:06:52,760 --> 00:06:54,200
SARAH GASPS HARDER
161
00:06:54,200 --> 00:06:56,120
Even worse sexual life partner.
162
00:06:56,120 --> 00:06:57,320
What?!
163
00:06:57,320 --> 00:06:59,440
Wait. You two were a power couple?
164
00:06:59,440 --> 00:07:03,440
No, we're not a power couple!
She ruined my life.
165
00:07:03,440 --> 00:07:04,800
Sorry, babe.
166
00:07:03,440 --> 00:07:04,800
RUTH LAUGHS BITTERLY
167
00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:06,080
No, SHE ruined MY life.
168
00:07:06,080 --> 00:07:08,800
Which is much worse
because my life is better.
169
00:07:08,800 --> 00:07:12,080
- Now get out!
- You can't
chuck me out of a food bank.
170
00:07:12,080 --> 00:07:14,320
I'm starving!
171
00:07:14,320 --> 00:07:15,360
Look at me.
172
00:07:16,520 --> 00:07:17,960
Wow!
173
00:07:17,960 --> 00:07:19,440
- Quick, have a "cream of".
- Beauty.
174
00:07:19,440 --> 00:07:22,720
No, she's not having a "cream of".
She needs to get a job.
175
00:07:22,720 --> 00:07:26,240
I do have a job. I'm an artist.
Tell 'em, babe.
176
00:07:26,240 --> 00:07:27,760
And how many paintings
have you sold?
177
00:07:27,760 --> 00:07:29,800
Clearly not enough
to not be in a food bank.
178
00:07:29,800 --> 00:07:33,120
- Yeah, well, you can suck shit.
- Yeah?
- Because guess what?
179
00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:35,760
I've had interest from a buyer
for a set of drawings
180
00:07:35,760 --> 00:07:38,520
that you just might remember.
181
00:07:38,520 --> 00:07:40,680
- Uh...
- "Uh..."?
182
00:07:40,680 --> 00:07:42,360
You'd better not be talking about...
183
00:07:42,360 --> 00:07:44,160
Hmm... Mm-hm! Yeah.
184
00:07:44,160 --> 00:07:47,280
No, you can't sell naked drawings
of someone without their consent.
185
00:07:47,280 --> 00:07:48,560
Y-You do know that, right?
186
00:07:48,560 --> 00:07:51,280
They're my drawings.
I can do whatever I want with them.
187
00:07:51,280 --> 00:07:53,040
No, but you can't, actually.
188
00:07:53,040 --> 00:07:55,280
I can do anything I want, princess!
189
00:07:56,280 --> 00:07:57,320
Fuck you.
190
00:07:58,640 --> 00:08:00,960
Stop throwing food,
you piece of shit!
191
00:08:00,960 --> 00:08:02,880
Will you grow up?!
192
00:08:02,880 --> 00:08:06,600
- You grow up! Take that, you bitch!
Take that!
- Get back!
193
00:08:06,600 --> 00:08:09,160
Take that, you piece of shit.
Coming in here!
194
00:08:09,160 --> 00:08:12,000
- Come on!
- Don't make me use this.
- Come on, then.
195
00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:13,600
THEY HISS AND GRUNT
196
00:08:13,600 --> 00:08:14,960
- Oh!
- Ah!
197
00:08:14,960 --> 00:08:16,360
Yeah! Come on.
198
00:08:16,360 --> 00:08:18,160
Fucking give me something.
199
00:08:18,160 --> 00:08:19,720
- Oh!
- Stop!
200
00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:23,400
QUIET GASPS
201
00:08:37,360 --> 00:08:39,120
Babe! Let's bounce.
202
00:08:39,120 --> 00:08:41,400
- Are you talking about me?
- No.
- No.
203
00:08:41,400 --> 00:08:44,560
Maddie, don't look at her.
Maddie, don't. Look at ME! Fuck!
204
00:08:53,400 --> 00:08:54,440
WHAT?!
205
00:08:58,360 --> 00:08:59,400
RUTH SOBS
206
00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:06,560
It's fine. It's just... It's just
cottage cheese for emphasis.
207
00:09:06,560 --> 00:09:07,680
SCANNER BEEPS
208
00:09:10,760 --> 00:09:13,040
- There we go.
- OK, moment of truth.
209
00:09:14,320 --> 00:09:16,040
CARD READER BEEPS
210
00:09:16,040 --> 00:09:18,400
- Oh, that's been rejected.
- God!
211
00:09:18,400 --> 00:09:20,520
Do you put it back
or do we put it back?
212
00:09:20,520 --> 00:09:21,680
DOOR CHIME PINGS
213
00:09:21,680 --> 00:09:25,040
- Look, the main thing is we tried.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
214
00:09:25,040 --> 00:09:26,520
Oh, shit. I forgot to put this back.
215
00:09:26,520 --> 00:09:28,880
- I'll be one sec.
- Hold on, hold on, hold on.
216
00:09:28,880 --> 00:09:30,760
What if you don't?
217
00:09:30,760 --> 00:09:32,840
- What? What, don't put it back?
- Yeah.
218
00:09:32,840 --> 00:09:34,520
Dad, that'd be stealing.
We'd be takers.
219
00:09:34,520 --> 00:09:36,840
Yeah, but think about
all of the hungry people.
220
00:09:36,840 --> 00:09:39,040
I mean, you saw how much food
that they had in there.
221
00:09:39,040 --> 00:09:41,720
God, yeah.
It's not even a real supermarket.
222
00:09:41,720 --> 00:09:44,600
- Imagine what all the big ones have.
- Well, yeah.
223
00:09:44,600 --> 00:09:47,680
I mean, the real question is,
224
00:09:47,680 --> 00:09:50,800
what are these faceless
supermarket corporations
225
00:09:50,800 --> 00:09:52,880
doing with all that food?
226
00:09:52,880 --> 00:09:54,520
Cos I suspect...
227
00:09:54,520 --> 00:09:56,400
..they're selling it
to the public...
228
00:09:56,400 --> 00:09:58,080
..for a profit.
229
00:09:56,400 --> 00:09:58,080
DOOR CHIME PINGS
230
00:09:58,080 --> 00:10:00,640
Well, by that logic,
we should take from them.
231
00:10:00,640 --> 00:10:01,840
What, him?
232
00:10:01,840 --> 00:10:05,120
No, not him. Like, you know,
like, big supermarkets -
233
00:10:05,120 --> 00:10:06,640
we should take from them.
234
00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:08,120
Yeah.
235
00:10:08,120 --> 00:10:10,000
Well, imagine if we did.
236
00:10:10,000 --> 00:10:11,280
Imagine.
237
00:10:11,280 --> 00:10:15,240
THEY LAUGH
238
00:10:18,440 --> 00:10:20,880
- Right, I'm going to pop this back.
- Yeah, yeah, definitely.
239
00:10:20,880 --> 00:10:22,160
DOOR CHIME PINGS
240
00:10:23,920 --> 00:10:25,040
Imagine...
241
00:10:26,920 --> 00:10:28,320
It's not that bad.
242
00:10:29,320 --> 00:10:30,760
We've all done nudes.
243
00:10:30,760 --> 00:10:32,000
Chi!
244
00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:35,480
It is a collection
of erotic drawings
245
00:10:35,480 --> 00:10:38,200
of me naked from every angle.
246
00:10:38,200 --> 00:10:41,040
Sorry, you're going to
have to give me a second.
247
00:10:41,040 --> 00:10:43,760
That was a lot of smut to take in.
248
00:10:43,760 --> 00:10:46,800
That was the worst five years
with that bitch.
249
00:10:46,800 --> 00:10:49,080
So what actually went wrong
with you and Sarah, then?
250
00:10:49,080 --> 00:10:51,800
Because, um...to me, you just...
251
00:10:51,800 --> 00:10:54,520
..you just looked like a couple of
MILFs that are made for each other.
252
00:10:54,520 --> 00:10:57,360
Well, she was psychotic. Yeah?
253
00:10:57,360 --> 00:10:59,000
Always saying things like...
254
00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:01,200
.."Shall we hold hands in the park?"
255
00:11:01,200 --> 00:11:04,320
And, "Why don't we share a pavlova?"
256
00:11:04,320 --> 00:11:05,680
Fucking mad!
257
00:11:06,920 --> 00:11:08,200
SHE EXHALES
258
00:11:08,200 --> 00:11:11,200
You know, the final straw
was her wanting to start a family.
259
00:11:11,200 --> 00:11:14,400
Oh, yeah. I mean, I remember
what it was like to have a family.
260
00:11:14,400 --> 00:11:16,080
I just feel awful, you know?
261
00:11:16,080 --> 00:11:19,560
And all those feelings
and memories coming back.
262
00:11:19,560 --> 00:11:22,120
Yeah, I remember what it was
like to have memories.
263
00:11:22,120 --> 00:11:24,480
- Especially...
- Will you shut up?
264
00:11:24,480 --> 00:11:27,560
Going on about yourself
all the time!
265
00:11:27,560 --> 00:11:29,560
It's exhausting!
266
00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:32,840
Is that not what we do, though?
267
00:11:32,840 --> 00:11:34,880
How long have we known each other?
268
00:11:34,880 --> 00:11:37,760
Oh, God. Um...
269
00:11:34,880 --> 00:11:37,760
CHI CHUCKLES
270
00:11:37,760 --> 00:11:38,840
Three sessions?
271
00:11:38,840 --> 00:11:40,200
And in all those three sessions,
272
00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:43,800
did you ever once ask me
how I was feeling?
273
00:11:45,320 --> 00:11:47,040
Oh.
274
00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:48,240
Oh, I'm sorry.
275
00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:52,400
- How are you?
- I'm fucking depressed!
276
00:11:52,400 --> 00:11:54,760
- Oh.
- That's how I'm feeling.
277
00:11:56,080 --> 00:11:59,760
- Oh! Oh!
- What?
- Wait, wait.
- Lucas. Lucas, come on.
278
00:11:59,760 --> 00:12:01,960
Broccoli. Sausages.
279
00:12:03,840 --> 00:12:05,600
- Oh, two whole chickens.
- Nice.
280
00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:08,640
Um. I've got...
281
00:12:10,680 --> 00:12:12,520
Oh, shit. Stuck.
282
00:12:12,520 --> 00:12:14,000
Can you get it out?
283
00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:16,520
- I've got the bottom.
- Got it?
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
284
00:12:16,520 --> 00:12:18,920
Magazine. Cheers, yeah.
285
00:12:18,920 --> 00:12:20,480
I still think
we could get some more, though.
286
00:12:20,480 --> 00:12:23,560
Yeah? I mean, I reckon I could get
a couple jars of pesto in here.
287
00:12:23,560 --> 00:12:25,400
- Get a Toblerone up there.
- Yeah.
288
00:12:25,400 --> 00:12:27,560
Well, I'm just going to
go ahead and say it -
289
00:12:27,560 --> 00:12:29,400
we do have two arseholes between us.
290
00:12:34,760 --> 00:12:36,200
- We did it.
- We did it.
291
00:12:38,040 --> 00:12:41,800
- A free stolen chicken help?
- It's not stolen. It's, um...
292
00:12:41,800 --> 00:12:43,520
It's just... It's just acquired.
293
00:12:43,520 --> 00:12:45,120
Would you like some free pasta?
294
00:12:46,400 --> 00:12:48,960
- Sausages from the shop.
- Yep.
- Stolen from the shop for you.
295
00:12:48,960 --> 00:12:51,000
- No, just acquired from the shop.
It's fine.
- For you, sir.
296
00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:53,080
Don't say they're stolen.
They won't take them.
297
00:12:53,080 --> 00:12:55,280
- Hello.
- Fancy yourself a chicken?
Whole chicken? Free of charge.
298
00:12:55,280 --> 00:12:57,560
A lovely whole chicken.
Free of charge.
299
00:12:57,560 --> 00:12:59,960
- Oh, feels good to be a giver,
doesn't it?
- Yeah.
300
00:12:59,960 --> 00:13:02,680
- To givers.
- Ching!
301
00:13:02,680 --> 00:13:03,840
HE SIGHS HAPPILY
302
00:13:03,840 --> 00:13:06,200
God, what a mess, ladies.
What happened there?
303
00:13:08,200 --> 00:13:09,920
Hey, what happened in there?
304
00:13:09,920 --> 00:13:12,480
No, no, she's not available
right now, unfortunately.
305
00:13:12,480 --> 00:13:14,640
- Could you not look at her?
- Yeah. Is she OK?
306
00:13:14,640 --> 00:13:16,720
Looks like she's laying in custard.
307
00:13:16,720 --> 00:13:18,560
For fuck's sake.
308
00:13:18,560 --> 00:13:21,000
Unfortunately,
there's been a small incident
309
00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:23,320
with Ruth's ex-girlfriend,
Sarah Gilbeaux...
310
00:13:23,320 --> 00:13:24,520
- No!
- Yeah, I know.
311
00:13:24,520 --> 00:13:28,720
..who's basically threatening
to sell, um, the Ruth anthology.
312
00:13:28,720 --> 00:13:31,960
So it's Ruth, drawn completely
naked from every angle,
313
00:13:31,960 --> 00:13:33,400
um...in 360 degrees.
314
00:13:33,400 --> 00:13:35,080
- Ahem!
- My God, that's terrible, Ruth.
315
00:13:35,080 --> 00:13:37,480
You must feel like a piece
of you has been taken.
316
00:13:37,480 --> 00:13:39,360
And I can only imagine
how hard it is for women
317
00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:41,280
in the modern-age time
of revenge art.
318
00:13:41,280 --> 00:13:44,240
- Yeah. That is exactly
how I'm feeling.
- Yeah.
- Mm.
319
00:13:44,240 --> 00:13:46,840
You know, God knows where those
drawings are going to end up.
320
00:13:46,840 --> 00:13:48,000
Well, probably Pornhub.
321
00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:50,480
PornBits. PornBurst.
MaturePorn, MatureTube,
322
00:13:50,480 --> 00:13:53,040
MatureTits, GirlsOutWest,
HornyElders...
323
00:13:53,040 --> 00:13:54,320
..MiddleAgedMinge.
324
00:13:54,320 --> 00:13:55,800
LooseWomen, KentCunts,
325
00:13:55,800 --> 00:13:58,800
and, um, you know,
the Turner Centre in Margate.
326
00:13:58,800 --> 00:14:01,520
If they end up in the Turner Centre,
I will kill myself.
327
00:14:01,520 --> 00:14:04,400
Or you could just, like,
leave the local area instead.
328
00:14:04,400 --> 00:14:05,840
Yeah, no, we need to sort this.
329
00:14:05,840 --> 00:14:08,360
- I can't have a depressed therapist.
No.
- Mm.
330
00:14:08,360 --> 00:14:11,200
We're going to have to steal
those bloody drawings back.
331
00:14:12,200 --> 00:14:13,840
Right?
332
00:14:13,840 --> 00:14:15,440
No, no, no, no.
333
00:14:15,440 --> 00:14:16,720
Come on, Dad. Come on.
334
00:14:16,720 --> 00:14:20,080
We only steal for the poor,
the hungry and the huddled masses.
335
00:14:20,080 --> 00:14:23,800
Whereas, Ruth,
she's going to be on, like, 55K.
336
00:14:23,800 --> 00:14:26,440
- 65!
- I don't care.
We'd be stealing to take a stand
337
00:14:26,440 --> 00:14:29,600
against the financial
exploitation of women, Dad.
338
00:14:29,600 --> 00:14:31,560
Yeah, I was... I mean,
I was going to say that, Ruth.
339
00:14:31,560 --> 00:14:33,520
That's exactly
what I was going to say.
340
00:14:35,480 --> 00:14:37,280
God, I'm starving.
341
00:14:37,280 --> 00:14:41,080
Been feeding the poor all day. I've
not had a chance to feed myself.
342
00:14:41,080 --> 00:14:42,960
There should be something in here.
343
00:14:42,960 --> 00:14:44,400
Aha!
344
00:14:44,400 --> 00:14:46,200
Yeah.
345
00:14:46,200 --> 00:14:48,360
These chicken nuggets - they'll
be all right to eat, won't they?
346
00:14:48,360 --> 00:14:49,720
I don't know, Dad.
They've been in there
347
00:14:49,720 --> 00:14:52,400
- since we all went to the Willy
Wonka Experience.
- Arrivederci!
348
00:14:52,400 --> 00:14:54,200
OK, listen, this is the plan,
all right?
349
00:14:54,200 --> 00:14:55,440
Me and David go inside the building.
350
00:14:55,440 --> 00:14:57,080
You are to stay
outside the building.
351
00:14:57,080 --> 00:14:58,760
Don't go anywhere near the building.
All right?
352
00:14:58,760 --> 00:15:00,720
It's very important you listen
to me about the building.
353
00:15:00,720 --> 00:15:01,960
Because, if one thing goes wrong,
354
00:15:01,960 --> 00:15:04,160
the whole thing could plummet
so we end up in prison, in court.
355
00:15:04,160 --> 00:15:06,360
Yeah, we don't want that, Lucas.
356
00:15:06,360 --> 00:15:09,600
- So what am I doing?
- Oh, Lucas,
I'm making myself so clear!
357
00:15:09,600 --> 00:15:12,320
We're stealing the drawings.
You're not stealing the drawings.
358
00:15:12,320 --> 00:15:15,080
You are to block Gilbeaux
from the plan.
359
00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:16,480
Correct?
360
00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:17,720
- Yeah.
- Thank you.
361
00:15:17,720 --> 00:15:19,040
DOOR CREAKS OPEN
362
00:15:19,040 --> 00:15:20,840
- Look.
- What?
363
00:15:20,840 --> 00:15:22,680
CHI GASPS
364
00:15:20,840 --> 00:15:22,680
Oh, my God. There she is.
365
00:15:22,680 --> 00:15:24,440
Wow. Look at her.
366
00:15:24,440 --> 00:15:27,800
OK. So how long do I have to keep
Gilbeaux busy and distracted for?
367
00:15:27,800 --> 00:15:30,120
Just for as long as
Gilbeauxically possible.
368
00:15:30,120 --> 00:15:32,080
- Copy that.
- Copy that?
- Roger that.
369
00:15:32,080 --> 00:15:34,240
- So do I go?
- Ugh.
370
00:15:34,240 --> 00:15:35,840
- Good luck, son.
- Thank you.
371
00:15:40,960 --> 00:15:43,080
- Ready?
- Let's go.
372
00:15:43,080 --> 00:15:46,800
Touch The Leather
by The Fat White Family
373
00:16:02,440 --> 00:16:03,560
DOG BARKS
374
00:16:02,440 --> 00:16:03,560
Oh!
375
00:16:05,960 --> 00:16:07,880
Chi! Basically, what I'm going to do
376
00:16:07,880 --> 00:16:10,160
is I'm going to
climb on the balcony...
377
00:16:10,160 --> 00:16:11,640
# Touch the leather, leather... #
378
00:16:11,640 --> 00:16:13,880
DOOR CREAKS
379
00:16:13,880 --> 00:16:16,240
Or just open the door. Yeah.
380
00:16:16,240 --> 00:16:18,280
# Baggy leather
381
00:16:18,280 --> 00:16:23,000
# Touch the leather, leather
Touch the leather, leather
382
00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:26,640
# Your skin on my leather... #
383
00:16:26,640 --> 00:16:28,680
Chi, wait!
384
00:16:28,680 --> 00:16:30,720
Stop. That's... Ooh!
385
00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:34,920
Check under the mat.
386
00:16:37,920 --> 00:16:39,680
HE BELCHES
387
00:16:37,920 --> 00:16:39,680
Oh, God.
388
00:16:39,680 --> 00:16:42,920
Those chicken nuggets have got
a really weird... Urk! ..aftertaste.
389
00:16:42,920 --> 00:16:44,160
PHONE LINE RINGS
390
00:16:44,160 --> 00:16:46,160
Hello, it's Ruth.
I'm closed for business.
391
00:16:46,160 --> 00:16:48,120
If you're on a bridge,
call the Samaritans.
392
00:16:48,120 --> 00:16:49,280
Ruth isn't answering.
393
00:16:52,440 --> 00:16:56,240
- Hi. You all right?
- All right?
- Hello. Urp! I'm sorry.
394
00:17:04,640 --> 00:17:07,360
Hey. Excuse me.
Hey, do you guys want, like, a...?
395
00:17:07,360 --> 00:17:08,960
I could do a picture of
the two of you together?
396
00:17:08,960 --> 00:17:10,440
Thank you very much.
We're just passing.
397
00:17:10,440 --> 00:17:12,480
No, to just, like, give it a...
398
00:17:12,480 --> 00:17:13,720
SARAH MUTTERS
399
00:17:18,240 --> 00:17:22,360
- Er...
- Oh, hey! Hi. Oh, hello.
- Hi.
- Er, would you like a portrait done?
400
00:17:22,360 --> 00:17:26,040
I do, er... It's one
for 20 or £75 for two.
401
00:17:26,040 --> 00:17:28,920
Um... I can post
about you on TikTok.
402
00:17:28,920 --> 00:17:30,960
Do you know what? Fuck this.
I'm going home.
403
00:17:30,960 --> 00:17:33,960
No, please wait. Don't leave me.
I love this one of Vanessa Feltz.
404
00:17:33,960 --> 00:17:36,920
- That's Gok Wan.
- Please, please draw me.
405
00:17:36,920 --> 00:17:41,160
I mean, like, talent like yours
comes along once in a lifetime.
406
00:17:41,160 --> 00:17:43,880
Thank you. I really appreciate that.
407
00:17:43,880 --> 00:17:48,800
Especially coming from such a
beautiful young lesbian such as you.
408
00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:50,400
Oh, thank...thank you. Yeah.
409
00:17:51,640 --> 00:17:52,960
- Take a seat.
- OK.
410
00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:57,160
Um... How do you want me?
411
00:17:57,160 --> 00:17:58,680
- Silent!
- Yes. Sorry.
412
00:18:00,960 --> 00:18:05,320
- No, don't move! You've fucked it!
- Yeah.
- You've absolutely fucked it!
413
00:18:11,160 --> 00:18:12,680
Wait, let me get my torch on.
414
00:18:19,440 --> 00:18:22,400
FLOORBOARDS CREAK
415
00:18:22,400 --> 00:18:23,520
Oh, actually, Chi...
416
00:18:27,960 --> 00:18:30,200
I wouldn't worry about that,
you know?
417
00:18:30,200 --> 00:18:32,440
- You're doing really well.
- Thank you.
- You're all right.
418
00:18:33,480 --> 00:18:35,480
- But maybe... Yeah...
- Just...
419
00:18:35,480 --> 00:18:37,080
HE GRUNTS
420
00:18:37,080 --> 00:18:40,680
HEAVY THUDS
421
00:18:50,720 --> 00:18:51,760
Did you hear that?
422
00:18:56,160 --> 00:18:58,640
- I really recognise you.
- Hm. That's weird.
423
00:18:58,640 --> 00:19:01,880
- I've never been to a campsite.
- Oh.
424
00:19:01,880 --> 00:19:03,640
- Finished!
- What? Already?
425
00:19:03,640 --> 00:19:05,640
- Oh, my God.
- That's brilliant.
426
00:19:05,640 --> 00:19:08,440
You've really... God, you've
really captured a likeness there.
427
00:19:08,440 --> 00:19:09,800
Yours.
428
00:19:09,800 --> 00:19:11,240
- Thank you.
- Anyway...
429
00:19:12,280 --> 00:19:13,960
..I guess I'm going to
pack up and go home.
430
00:19:13,960 --> 00:19:16,000
You know, head off
and watch some mid '80s Ellen.
431
00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:17,720
No, no, no, please don't leave,
OK? Just do...
432
00:19:17,720 --> 00:19:20,040
Can you not do another one?
I want a few different options.
433
00:19:20,040 --> 00:19:21,920
Oh. Well, what do you mean,
different?
434
00:19:21,920 --> 00:19:23,840
What sort of thing
were you thinking of?
435
00:19:23,840 --> 00:19:26,440
Literally whatever will take up
the absolute most of your time.
436
00:19:29,720 --> 00:19:32,960
How do you feel about...nudity?
437
00:19:32,960 --> 00:19:34,160
Oh, um...
438
00:19:35,160 --> 00:19:37,640
Well, I've never
really thought about it.
439
00:19:38,760 --> 00:19:40,520
How do you feel about...
440
00:19:40,520 --> 00:19:41,880
..extreme nudity?
441
00:19:44,520 --> 00:19:46,360
Could we go back to just nudity?
442
00:19:52,840 --> 00:19:55,520
- Should just punch it.
- OK. Stand clear.
443
00:19:56,840 --> 00:19:58,560
PLASTIC CLATTERS
444
00:19:58,560 --> 00:19:59,600
I'll do another one.
445
00:20:06,200 --> 00:20:08,160
WINDOW CREAKS
446
00:20:09,200 --> 00:20:10,360
Window's open.
447
00:20:15,280 --> 00:20:18,240
HE BELCHES
448
00:20:15,280 --> 00:20:18,240
- Sh!
- OK, sorry.
449
00:20:24,400 --> 00:20:27,640
Wow. Can't believe
I'm in Sarah Gilbeaux's apartment.
450
00:20:28,680 --> 00:20:30,360
It's like Make A Wish.
451
00:20:30,360 --> 00:20:32,080
HE BELCHES
452
00:20:30,360 --> 00:20:32,080
Excuse me.
453
00:20:32,080 --> 00:20:34,440
Um, do you know where the toilet is?
454
00:20:34,440 --> 00:20:36,240
I've only just got here.
455
00:20:36,240 --> 00:20:37,440
STOMACH GURGLES
456
00:20:36,240 --> 00:20:37,440
Oh, God.
457
00:20:42,120 --> 00:20:43,160
Oh, Ruth.
458
00:20:46,840 --> 00:20:48,680
PHONE LINE RINGS
459
00:20:48,680 --> 00:20:50,360
Hey, Ruth. How are you?
460
00:20:50,360 --> 00:20:54,560
Just the same, you know?
Still feel like shit.
461
00:20:54,560 --> 00:20:55,800
I just...
462
00:20:55,800 --> 00:20:58,520
I just sometimes wonder
if it wouldn't just be better
463
00:20:58,520 --> 00:21:00,240
to just end it all, you know?
464
00:21:00,240 --> 00:21:03,920
- Should I go?
- No, no, no.
This won't take long.
465
00:21:03,920 --> 00:21:06,280
Well, I think I found your drawings,
by the way.
466
00:21:07,440 --> 00:21:08,720
Don't look at them!
467
00:21:08,720 --> 00:21:10,080
I'm not.
468
00:21:10,080 --> 00:21:12,320
Well done. Is it all 47 of them?
469
00:21:12,320 --> 00:21:14,080
Internal and external?
470
00:21:14,080 --> 00:21:16,000
Um...
471
00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:17,560
..yeah. There's a...
472
00:21:17,560 --> 00:21:19,400
I think it might be.
473
00:21:19,400 --> 00:21:20,960
Well, don't look!
474
00:21:20,960 --> 00:21:24,560
Um...um...get them out
without looking at them.
475
00:21:24,560 --> 00:21:25,600
Wait.
476
00:21:27,720 --> 00:21:30,360
Sorry, I thought you said
we were going to a studio.
477
00:21:30,360 --> 00:21:33,320
- Yeah, we are. It's in my flat.
- Oh.
478
00:21:33,320 --> 00:21:36,840
No. You know what? I don't...
I don't fancy being in a studio.
479
00:21:36,840 --> 00:21:38,960
Do you mind
if we did it somewhere else?
480
00:21:38,960 --> 00:21:40,160
Er, where?
481
00:21:40,160 --> 00:21:41,920
Out here would be fine.
482
00:21:43,440 --> 00:21:46,040
I know what this is. You're nervous.
483
00:21:47,280 --> 00:21:49,000
- Yeah.
- And, listen, I promise you,
484
00:21:49,000 --> 00:21:51,520
this is going to be
a really positive experience.
485
00:21:52,800 --> 00:21:55,080
- OK?
- OK.
- OK.
- OK.
486
00:21:55,080 --> 00:21:57,280
Oh, and, er...my toilet's broken,
487
00:21:57,280 --> 00:21:59,800
so, if you need to go, just, like,
shit in the bush or something.
488
00:21:59,800 --> 00:22:02,000
Yeah, great. You know what?
Actually, I do need to go.
489
00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:03,840
So, if you just give me a second,
then...
490
00:22:03,840 --> 00:22:06,560
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Great.
- Yeah, go.
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
491
00:22:06,560 --> 00:22:10,440
- Take your time.
- I will.
- Yeah.
- Yeah, really, I will.
- Yeah.
492
00:22:10,440 --> 00:22:12,360
- Pick up!
- Gilbeaux incoming!
493
00:22:14,560 --> 00:22:16,800
- Oh, gosh. So much better.
- Hello?
494
00:22:16,800 --> 00:22:19,640
- What's that? Dipsy from Teletubbies?
- No, he can't look at them either!
495
00:22:19,640 --> 00:22:23,440
Ruth, you know, um...
drawing number 45?
496
00:22:23,440 --> 00:22:25,800
- Stop looking!
- Is that your actual front bum?
497
00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:29,760
Or is it the back of someone's
head doing a cunnilingus?
498
00:22:29,760 --> 00:22:32,440
I said don't look! Don't look!
499
00:22:32,440 --> 00:22:35,560
- Excuse me, I'm just...
- No, no, no.
This won't... Stay there.
500
00:22:35,560 --> 00:22:39,320
It's actually, like, the size
of the Wimbledon runner-up plate.
501
00:22:39,320 --> 00:22:41,200
Yeah. Just cos, um, it's apparently
502
00:22:41,200 --> 00:22:43,160
the size of
the Wimbledon runner-up plate.
503
00:22:43,160 --> 00:22:44,640
Why are you looking at them?!
504
00:22:44,640 --> 00:22:46,600
They're saying
there's too much hair,
505
00:22:46,600 --> 00:22:48,760
but the hair is back, isn't it, now?
506
00:22:48,760 --> 00:22:51,440
They're not having it all
off any more, are they?
507
00:22:52,720 --> 00:22:54,560
I've been peeing for too long,
haven't I?
508
00:22:54,560 --> 00:22:55,960
- Yeah, you really are.
- OK.
509
00:22:55,960 --> 00:22:58,560
- Yeah.
- OK.
- OK.
510
00:23:00,000 --> 00:23:03,520
- It's like, um...someone's
making a pizza, 16-inch.
- What?!
511
00:23:03,520 --> 00:23:06,000
And instead of things
like, you know,
512
00:23:06,000 --> 00:23:10,560
toppings like mushrooms,
pineapple and, like, garlic,
513
00:23:10,560 --> 00:23:12,800
they've done just ham and pubes.
514
00:23:12,800 --> 00:23:14,920
Stop looking!
It doesn't matter how much...
515
00:23:14,920 --> 00:23:17,200
FRONT DOOR RATTLES
516
00:23:14,920 --> 00:23:17,200
- Quick!
- Shit!
517
00:23:17,200 --> 00:23:18,560
- Hello?
- Oh, my God.
518
00:23:18,560 --> 00:23:21,240
- Spiders?
- Yeah.
- Rabbit food?
- Yep.
519
00:23:21,240 --> 00:23:23,720
- Paloma Faith?
- Yep.
- Oh.
520
00:23:23,720 --> 00:23:26,600
Told you - if you can name it,
I've eaten it.
521
00:23:28,040 --> 00:23:32,240
Listen, I'm going to need about, uh,
five minutes to just get set up, OK?
522
00:23:32,240 --> 00:23:34,320
Yeah. Oh, you're...
523
00:23:32,240 --> 00:23:34,320
HE GASPS
524
00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:42,680
- Um... Oh.
- Hey.
- Hey.
- What's up?
525
00:23:42,680 --> 00:23:44,200
Er, nothing.
526
00:23:45,400 --> 00:23:46,600
No. Um...
527
00:23:48,000 --> 00:23:49,280
Actually, can you smell that?
528
00:23:49,280 --> 00:23:51,040
SARAH SNIFFS
529
00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:53,440
- Do you mean the smell
of fresh diarrhoea?
- Yes.
530
00:23:53,440 --> 00:23:54,560
SARAH SNIFFS
531
00:23:54,560 --> 00:23:56,600
Yes, I can.
532
00:23:56,600 --> 00:23:59,680
- Weird.
- It's weird.
I haven't used the toilet in months.
533
00:24:01,640 --> 00:24:03,680
- What are you doing?
- Why bring her here?
534
00:24:03,680 --> 00:24:06,160
Out of all the errors tonight,
that's the most incompetent, son.
535
00:24:06,160 --> 00:24:08,200
You need to keep her busy,
all right?
536
00:24:08,200 --> 00:24:09,480
Think, Lucas!
537
00:24:10,480 --> 00:24:13,320
- Um, hey!
- Hi, hey.
- You OK?
538
00:24:13,320 --> 00:24:15,960
Well, yeah. Er...no.
539
00:24:15,960 --> 00:24:19,560
Someone's broken in
and defecated in my toilet.
540
00:24:19,560 --> 00:24:21,800
And you're sure it wasn't you?
541
00:24:21,800 --> 00:24:23,240
Maybe.
542
00:24:23,240 --> 00:24:26,040
Why would I do that to myself?
543
00:24:26,040 --> 00:24:27,200
Um...
544
00:24:27,200 --> 00:24:32,040
Hey, please! Can we just focus on,
you know, painting me in the nude?
545
00:24:32,040 --> 00:24:33,080
OK?
546
00:24:36,640 --> 00:24:37,680
Got my shoe off.
547
00:24:39,160 --> 00:24:40,440
Ah!
548
00:24:40,440 --> 00:24:42,200
Run.
549
00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:43,920
Don't drop any.
550
00:24:43,920 --> 00:24:45,120
Shit!
551
00:24:47,640 --> 00:24:48,680
Hey!
552
00:24:51,120 --> 00:24:52,600
Quick! Back in.
553
00:24:55,080 --> 00:24:58,160
Wow. That's extreme nudity.
554
00:24:59,400 --> 00:25:02,240
Quick! I don't know how long
I can stay this hard for.
555
00:25:02,240 --> 00:25:03,640
KNOCK ON DOOR
556
00:25:02,240 --> 00:25:03,640
Police!
557
00:25:06,560 --> 00:25:09,120
All right, boys? Graham.
558
00:25:09,120 --> 00:25:11,960
This gentleman's apartment
has been broken into
559
00:25:11,960 --> 00:25:14,280
and completely destroyed.
560
00:25:14,280 --> 00:25:17,040
- Have you seen anything suspicious?
- Yeah.
561
00:25:17,040 --> 00:25:20,640
Someone broke into my apartment
and did a liquid shit in the toilet.
562
00:25:20,640 --> 00:25:22,280
DOOR OPENS
563
00:25:22,280 --> 00:25:23,320
Oof!
564
00:25:25,960 --> 00:25:28,600
- Oh, shit.
- Oh, wait.
565
00:25:30,560 --> 00:25:31,720
Who's died now?
566
00:25:33,880 --> 00:25:35,440
- Psst!
- Him.
567
00:25:35,440 --> 00:25:38,880
Sarah Gilbeaux, are you
annoyed at me? Is she annoyed at me?
568
00:25:38,880 --> 00:25:40,360
Oh, thank God.
Gilbeaux's coming over.
569
00:25:40,360 --> 00:25:42,880
Hopefully, she'll forgive me
and maybe draw me in the nude.
570
00:25:42,880 --> 00:25:44,800
OK. Smarten up.
571
00:25:44,800 --> 00:25:46,920
Er, Miss Gilbeaux
is pressing charges.
572
00:25:46,920 --> 00:25:47,960
THEY GROAN
573
00:25:47,960 --> 00:25:51,600
- For breaking and entering and theft.
- And defecation.
574
00:25:51,600 --> 00:25:55,080
But I did it in the toilet,
where it belongs.
575
00:25:55,080 --> 00:25:56,920
It's true. It is a tricky charge.
576
00:25:56,920 --> 00:25:59,480
- I'd also like to press charges.
- Ruth!
577
00:25:59,480 --> 00:26:01,400
Officer, where do you stand
578
00:26:01,400 --> 00:26:03,440
on nonconsensual sharing
of intimate images?
579
00:26:03,440 --> 00:26:05,560
- Oh, fucking... Here we go.
- Hi, Ruth.
580
00:26:05,560 --> 00:26:07,720
- Hi.
- Hi, Ruth.
- Hi.
- Hi, Ruth.
581
00:26:07,720 --> 00:26:10,840
- OK. For the last time.
- Yes?
- These are mine.
582
00:26:10,840 --> 00:26:13,360
I drew them.
I can do whatever I want with them.
583
00:26:13,360 --> 00:26:16,040
Actually, you can't share
those without her consent.
584
00:26:16,040 --> 00:26:19,040
I knew it.
Oh, you Australian fuck-rag.
585
00:26:19,040 --> 00:26:21,200
- "Fuck-rag"?
- Bet you feel like a right idiot.
586
00:26:21,200 --> 00:26:22,840
No, I don't feel like an idiot.
587
00:26:22,840 --> 00:26:25,720
You're the one who just sent three
people to break into my apartment -
588
00:26:25,720 --> 00:26:28,760
- one of whom is a patient of yours.
- And?
589
00:26:28,760 --> 00:26:30,720
Which one of us
do you think she's talking about?
590
00:26:30,720 --> 00:26:32,960
Now, that is malpractice.
591
00:26:32,960 --> 00:26:34,520
- Oh!
- She's right.
- "She's right"!
592
00:26:34,520 --> 00:26:36,160
What do you know about malpractice?
593
00:26:36,160 --> 00:26:38,600
What do you mean, what does he know?
He's an officer of the law.
594
00:26:38,600 --> 00:26:40,960
- Oh, sorry, officer.
- Why are you such a bitch?!
595
00:26:40,960 --> 00:26:42,560
Guys! Please stop.
596
00:26:42,560 --> 00:26:45,960
Let's just drop all the charges,
OK? I beg.
597
00:26:45,960 --> 00:26:49,440
Ruth, what if you keep
all the frontal nudes?
598
00:26:49,440 --> 00:26:52,080
- You keep all the back rolls.
- Maybe...
- Yeah...
599
00:26:52,080 --> 00:26:55,280
That way, if she sells them, no-one
will even be able to tell it's you.
600
00:26:55,280 --> 00:26:59,160
Yeah. That's pretty good. Is that
legal? Like, in the court of law?
601
00:26:59,160 --> 00:27:01,600
- Sure.
- We should shake on it,
probably.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
602
00:27:01,600 --> 00:27:02,840
- OK, Ruth.
- OK, here we go.
603
00:27:02,840 --> 00:27:05,840
RUTH CACKLES
604
00:27:02,840 --> 00:27:05,840
- Loser!
- Oh, you fucking dick!
605
00:27:05,840 --> 00:27:07,680
DOOR CLOSES
606
00:27:05,840 --> 00:27:07,680
Ugh!
607
00:27:07,680 --> 00:27:08,840
That's theft.
608
00:27:08,840 --> 00:27:10,840
Oh, fuck,
I'm still in love with her.
609
00:27:10,840 --> 00:27:13,800
- Ugh... Yep.
- What, me?
610
00:27:13,800 --> 00:27:16,760
- Really?
- No - Ruth.
611
00:27:16,760 --> 00:27:19,440
Oh, yeah. Fair enough.
612
00:27:21,000 --> 00:27:22,320
God, she's a fast runner.
613
00:27:22,320 --> 00:27:25,160
{\an8}Probably should have run
after her, shouldn't I?
614
00:27:25,160 --> 00:27:29,280
Uh, you two, can you get off the
bench and start scraping, please?
615
00:27:29,280 --> 00:27:31,320
- Us?
- And put your high-vises on?
616
00:27:32,560 --> 00:27:33,760
Thank you.
617
00:27:33,760 --> 00:27:36,960
- Cor, this bit's
really stubborn, innit?
- Yeah.
618
00:27:36,960 --> 00:27:39,760
- But it feels good
to give back.
- Yeah.
619
00:27:39,760 --> 00:27:43,680
# Can't live
620
00:27:43,680 --> 00:27:47,080
# If living is without you
621
00:27:47,080 --> 00:27:50,600
# I can't live
622
00:27:50,600 --> 00:27:54,160
# I can't give any more
623
00:27:54,160 --> 00:27:58,320
# I can't live
624
00:27:58,320 --> 00:28:01,560
# If living is without you
625
00:28:01,560 --> 00:28:05,080
# I can't live
626
00:28:05,080 --> 00:28:09,440
# I can't give any more
627
00:28:09,440 --> 00:28:12,600
# Oh, oh-oh-oh... #
46904
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